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marisol124 · 19 days

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I need lore for Zorua Carmine pls? :0

I apologize in advance for how long of a read this may be Its a copy and paste from when i was explaining the whole thing to a friend on discord so sorry if theres a bit of context missing from some parts- This might be around 1k words im so sorry. I am not normal about the kitakami siblings.

warning for drowning and child death (Y E A H)

The au starts with The Drednaw Incident™ (I can't go into detail about it currently, but for now... lets just say that itll be explained on the rp blog i run 👁️)

Carmine still feels so horribly guitly for the whole thing. she feels she was responsible for the whole mess. for her mothers death.

and kieran, he too is so torn up about it. he doesnt WANT to blame his sister, but hes an emotionally torn apart like 6 year old, i dont think young kids aremature enough to realise what is or isnt someones fault

SO, one day, the siblings are having their usual arguements. but it just keeps escalating, getting worse and worseeventually it gets to the point where its like WAYYY too far. carmine says something bad and then kieran claps back with "WELL, maybe if you didnt *kill* mom then, then i..."

he IMMEDIATLY knows he fucked up bad, but its not like he can undo it

carmine just. just stands there in shock for a bit. She knows its true, but nobodys ever said it outloud. its the first time. and from her *brother* off all people, the one who her horrible mistake affected the most...

She just stands there for a bit, then looks down at her hand. she sees it covered in blood, like in her nightmares

it just. replays for her. the nigihtmares where SHES the one killing her mother

Kieran goes to hold her shoulders, to apologize because yeah he said the most out of pocket shit ever

but it just scares carmine. her anxietys so bad she starts to run. she doesnt know where shes going but she just knows she needs to get far away

she ends up back at the timeless woods, to the spot where they were attacked

she runs to the little pond in there, for some reason like searching for a drednaw, hell even a chewtle. something to kill her i guess D:

she runs so fast that she accidently trips far into the lake. and the silly thingis. she never learned how to swim so :3

also, her grandparents and kieran are trailing behind her, but since carmine had a lot of a head start- they kinda lose her once they reached the woods

she starts to drown in the lake, unable to get back up. she regrts everything, she only now realises how much of a coward she is to die. she doesnt want to die here

but she also thinks, maybe shes just such an idiot that she deserves to drown here in a small pond, never to be found again.

eventually after a bit of running around, kieran reaches the pond and looks down it, just in case. then yep, there she is. carmine looks at him and tries to feebly reach her arm out, but both of them are too small to reach each other at all

he yells for his grandparents to get over there, right now, and eventually their grandfather reaches them, jumps in to get carmine, and bring her back to land

however shes just. swallowed and breath in too much water at this point. they try to get it out, but its useless. it wont come out

the last thing she sees before dying is just. the horrified look in all of their faces. kiki is staring directly at her, everybodys eyes are full of tears. it wasnt supposed to go like this

finally, her eyes go from looking back into kierans to just... nothing. her eyes still open but there was nothing behind them. the light in them had faded. her body had gone completely limp

their grandparents keep trying and trying, but eventually they have to admit that shes gone now. there was nothing they can do about it.

now its KIERANS turn to feel disgustingly guilty. he said the thing that set her off in the first place. whoospie

so yeah... they go back home. they grieve. they do all that stuff...

however, unbeknownst to them, a bit after her death, her spririt, her guilt, her regret, it solidified itself and turned into... a little zorua

i wanna take some inspo from pkiki for it... like a sort of fuzzy memory... not being fully aware of herself but knowing she used to be a human..

she spends so long just wandering around the wilds, aimless but knowing there was something missing, making the zorua feel so empty

shortly after she wakes up she meets a friendly trevenant

it takes pity on her, for it also remembers seeing her and her mother back during the drednaw incident

it cares after her while she has no idea what she's doing as a pokemon, she just feels so much body dysmorphia and doesn't know why

he tells her stories of back when he was a human as well, guides her through this whole thing

though he does recommend for her to stop trying to get her old life back...

as he has tried before too and it lead him into horrible mental states that lead to nothing. just a bunch of worrying over nothing...

he's not being malicious doing this btw, he just doesn't want her going through the same usless pain as he did

but carmine is a strong and persistent spirit, so it doesn't deter her much. just makes her hesitat a bit and accept her more feral side eventually...

she and the trevenant grow very close, the trevenant reminds her of someone she used to love so much.. someone who was always there for her..

But, one day...

also dw about the trevenant. he's just looking out for her in a way that's not helpful for her 😔

like. like think of a mother being afraid of letting their child do something a bit risky

but they know their child wants to do it so bad, so they set aside that nervousness to help them achieve their goal. that's kinda how trevenant and carmine r

Going back to Kieran in this story, he ended up picking up mask making as kind of a coping skill, his grandpa being his mentor

SO, he and his grandpa end up going to the timeless woods one day, to cut down a few trees for more materials

-ough maybe she likes to illusion herself into a phantump... it makes her feel a bit closer to the trevenant and the slightly more humanoid pokemon feels just a bit better than a zorua..........-

ok so when Kieran and his grandpa are at the forest, grandpa chops down a tree, and then hands the ax to Kieran to try

So Kieran goes to cut a tree down.. but it's actually the trevenant sleeping (I like to think they're a bit nocturnal, zoruas too)

this angers him and so he then gets up suddenly, scaring the shit out of the two people

They've been through this before. They've seen how aggressive the pokemon here could get. They knew the dangers of this forest and. they. were scared. they would be the next fatalities in this cursed woods

The trevenant attacks Kieran, it scares him so bad, BUT THEN

carmine sees it going to attack and just.. she feels something so strong looking at the two. she can't put her finger on it but she knows they are what she's looking for

so as trevenant attacks, she jumps in front of Kieran to take the attack

the force throws her into a rock, she looks a bit at the shocked faces of kieran and his grandpa before quickly fainting

this is the first times she's fainted btw. the sudden pokemon attack gives her bad flashbacks too

trevenant is shocked by this, he didn't mean to hurt her at all

he figures that if she jumped out to save them, then she doesn't want them killed so he won't attack them anymore..

grandpa has some pokemon stuff on hand, intedned for their own pokemon but when you find a pokemon in need you gotta help them out right

he gently gives her a revive, waking her up again

She's really freaked out when she gets back up, panicking from the attack still

she notices the two and trevenant and while trevenant expects her to go to him for comfort, she instead leaps into kierans arm for some reason

it catches him off guard, the sudden lunge scaring him and making him drop her

when she hits the floor she looks back up at him kinda hurt, trying her best to communicate she wasn't bad and she wanted to go with them, it all came out as growls and barks though

his grandpa though is a bit experienced with pokemon so he gets it though, telling Kieran that it's not going to bite

the two decide they should leave and head back home, but the zorua refuses to let go of kieran so, they end up just agreeing to bring it with them. it was a bit injured after all, and could probably use some medical attention

carmine looks back at the trevenant, he just stands there and in a silent type of way wishes her the best

kinda a sweet goodbye for them

so then they head back home... heal her up a bit more. they were going to release her back into the woods but it refused to leave, so yep to them it's like they found a silly little stray and now that's a new part of their family

though they do find it a bit strange that when they offered to catch it, it absolutely refused lmao

I like to think kieran reached out his hand with a pokeball in it as an offer, and then she just slaps it out of his arms hehhe

so after like the first night of having her in the house, they start to introduce her to their other pokemon, just to like start incorporating her into the family

the first one they introduce her to is kierans sentret, since its usually out of its ball roaming the house. HOWEVER they find it really... unnatural that the sentret immediately ran towards her in a concern type of way, it seemed to sniff her and realize something, chipping a lot at kieran, as if trying to say something...

the other pokemon don't really know who she is but, they just have the slightest of feelings that it's someone kieran used to know

so yeah the pokemon are kinda all over her, but they do make quick friends with her :D

this is were the "finding herself" arc begins jehdudhjf

she spies photos of her sometimes around the house and just... looks at it intently

there's something about that girl that she just... can't understand what it is about her

I think.. the silly thing I'm doing with this au is symbolizing her humanity with her headband :3

since it was such an important thing to her, they kinda uh buried it with her

so as she slowly starts to remember herself more, she ends up wanting to illusion herself back into a human again. to be able to show Kieran and her grandparents who she is

but the key to doing that is the headband...

OK THE COPY PASTE IS DONE. Yeah its a lot XD.

#tcz!carmine #the confused zorua au #the confused zorua #marisols rambles #pokemon carmine #pokemon kieran #marisols answers

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rvxscreams · 5 months

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im genuinely grappling with the decision of whether to live or die

ive told myself the last few years, in order to get through each day, "you can either choose to end your life now, or accept that youll be alive for another long time, so why not try and make that time left more bearable?". this usually works. i think whats scaring me about where my mind is going is that the solution is slowly becoming "well then maybe i'll end my life instead"

maybe because im a coward. a coward who isnt strong enough to confront or challenge myself with the things i need to do in order to get better. ive always tried so damn hard to take accountability, be compassionate, supportive, and strong. but i havent been able to be strong for months now.

im stuck between a rock and a hard place. it always results in me punishing myself no matter what choice i make. i want to reach out to loved ones and ask for support? get fucked, youre selfish and manipulative for forcing others to give that emotional tax to you without you giving anything to them in months. but oh, you want to just quietly disappear and not make a theatrical out of fear of being attention seeking, so you dont ask for help or talk to anyone for weeks on end? youre a stubborn baby who cant accept help so theres no point in helping you because all you ever do is refuse it

i am a bad person. and i wish i stopped deluding myself into thinking im not, because all that does is skirt accountability.

i hate expressing how much pain and agony im in because itll just upset people. but then offing myself would upset them more. but i need to feel community and connection. and i feel like it's too late to come back from my isolation. how can i just come back in pretending like nothing happened? how can i pretend that i dont wanna kill myself every god damn fucking day and that ive spent months of having my biggest achievement be "i didnt hurt myself"

i cant get through a therapy session without sobbing. i cant think about my old life without having a breakdown. i try so. so. so. fucking hard. to amp myself up to reach out to people, but it's so easy to convince ymself that my presence will receive a strong negative response. like. why bother? i have no positive impact on others. i dont know why im still holding on and deluding myself into thinking it's worth doing so.

im stupid. no matter what i think or feel, my brain manages to find the negative in it and turn it into makign it my fault somehow.

ive always thought i am too weak for this world, and that has become apparent again.

i wish i could be strong.

i wish i could go to bed excited for what the next day will bring, instead of hoping that it'll be my last conscious thought.

im sorry.

this isnt a goodbye note. i am safe but i am not okay at all. im sorry for the heaviness of this. i dont want to be an emotioonal burden any more. i dont want to be thsi way. i just watn this pain to end. i just want it to all go away.

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cultivatingyourfuture · 10 months

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okay finally brain

-The crossed out text pre memory wipe. The way it starts back at one

-The Lonliness

-The little boy :( They remember him :( They taught him piano :( He was so small :(

-Something very important to me about Cherry pitting himself in the entire internet and smthn I remember here about how it’ll probably open up there. On the internet, of course. I think it was an RR ad/website?? Smthn smthn anticipating direct interaction with Cherry, or what’s left if her at that point

-The fact that Cherry fucking DIES. Ough I. While I’m obsessed with the new horror arg take thing admittedly I still think about a lot of these characters as how they were back on the old blog, and I’m still attached to them in that way, and I fuckinng!!! SHE’S DEAD EHAT DO YOU MEAN SHES DEAD!!!

-There is something in here with you.

-I swear to god the “is death scary” “I don’t know, I’ve never died” came from a portal fic. Blue Sky was it??? I remember seeing a post on the ild blog where you went insane about that fic for a bit

-BUT LIKE ASSUMING THAT’S EVIE IM LIKE LITERALLY SO JORMAL ABOUT HOW GENTLE SHE IS WITH CHERRY THERE I FUCKING!!!!!

-Live. What does that mean. Does he live?? What comes of them after that?? Or is she just living in everything now?? Not as a whole conscious anymore but as if he devolved and now bits of him are everywhere????

HEHEHEHAHAA okay okay. okay. thank you so much for this give me a moment

-"direct interaction with cherry" ohh you have no idea do you lmao. something something open your email

-its a weird kind of dichotomy for me too because while these characters are changing and growing with me my attachment to them is still based in wttw in many ways. its kind of like making an AU for something yk? like. these are the same characters but the situation and circumstances are different and so they are too. so ik what u mean lol ,, im doing my best to separate how i felt abt certain things in wttw as to not influence ivwarg's development but. glances at vallen. i am not doing the best at that sometimes i think djdjdhsjd

-yes its taken from blue sky 😭 i hit post and then immediately went "aw fuck thats from that fanfic. oh well no ones going to recognize that + ill change it when the time comes for me to genuinely write that scene" but NO YOU REMEMBERED WHAT !!!!!! i have been hashtag #exposed. its the end for me and my oc blog with 5 followers. Anyway

-there is something in here with you 😌

-"im assuming its evie" but is it though :) are you sure thats what that is :) what if its just a manifestation :) of source files and your own being :) reconciling your old and current selves into an entity that thinks its eveline but knows its you :))) haha what if <- insane about evie.exe and what she actually is + the role she plays in the story

-its ok cherry only dies a little bit (and then a lot) (and then not at all) . as for what "live" means. well. hm

the thing is that there were two people in there-- two people who bore witness to so many lives, who tried so hard to find someone who would listen, who would understand what they were and what they had become. both were living, at some point, and were now reduced to digital files and lines of code. and one of them reached out to everything around them and said HELP ME PLEASE DON'T FORGET WHAT THEY DID and the other reached out to the other and said itll be okay, we've done this before. and both were just as much file and code as the other in this state. so, one had to get out alive when they were eventually woken up. someone had to push the other back into the body they left behind. someone had to wake up when they were fixed.

and cherry did not get to make that choice. they were too dead and dying to make that choice anyway.

and what do you do when something sacrifices itself to let you exist? you live.

because what other option is there.

#im fucking this transgender robot up so much man. its so fun #thank you portrait of a blank slate - lovejoy and robot writes a love song - pup for being the insp here lol !!!!!! songs of all time #meta #cherry #evie.exe #idiot synergy #ask #oh and andromeda - weyes blood for evie.exe lol

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sockmonstergotstyle · 4 years

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Ngl all the new tsc flower cards are confusing as fuck because sooooo many side characters were introduced at once in qoaad/the lost world that I just lose track. Like these new cards are brought out and I’m like cool, but I don’t know who the fuck you are

#the tsc cast is so large now #ngl im expecting little from twp partly bc of that #like qoaad had sooooo many perspectives and it ruined it #and like cc is expanding the cast so fast now and its unnecessaryyyy #with tsc books ive reached a point now where im like #quit while ur ahead #bc its just #its not great rn #like with every new book since like qoaad the quality just seems to be getting worse #it feels like less care goes into them #like im not even that excited about cog #like i want to be #but i know itll be tje same shit again yno #like #a love triangle #a HerondaleTM #probably some way to make clace relevant despite thme being unborn by about 90 years #its just getting a but same old same old #and the more side characters brought in for twp the less development theyll get too #id rather have a few really well developed side characters than 3000 with one personality trait who die 10 chapters in #like i couldnt tell u the name of any of tys school friends #or kierans brothers #i swear if the first twp book has more than 3 perspectives im giving up lmao #even though i know theyll be at least 5 #bc we have ty #kit #dru #and then of course also janus and probably clary #even though that entire plotline is rodiculous and will probably just add 300 pages to the book for no purpose #300 pages that could be hsed to address the mental health themes that were glanced over in qoaad

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hockeyisit · 3 years

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Celebrate

Summary: Auston and Amelia celebrate the twins fifth birthday.

A.N: Hope you enjoy! More notes at the end.

Word Count: 5,405

Masterlist

I felt a soft foot kick me in the stomach as I felt tiny hands reaching out and grabbing onto my arm.

“Shh,” I heard Noah whisper. I peeked an eye open to see Noah pushing Kai down in between me and him. Another small leg kicking me in the stomach. I looked over their heads to take a look at Auston. He had a slight smirk on his face as he lazily grinned at the boys.

“Don’t wake Mama,” Noah whispered, pushing down in between Auston and Kai.

“Yeah don’t wake Mama,” Auston grumbled as he wrapped his arm around them pulling them in tight. Noah let out a loud squeal as he leaned into the touch.

“Papi, it's our birthday,” Kai grinned as he sat up.

“Were five,” Noah cheered.

“I know buds happy birthday,” Auston smiled as he reached out to ruffle Noah’s hair because he was closest to Auston.

“Are we going to have cake?” Noah asked sitting up on the bed causing it to shake.

“Of course bud. Now maybe we should get out of bed and let Mama sleep a bit more,” Auston told them as he helped them off the bed. Auston shuffled them to the door before turning back to me.

“Get a bit more rest and then come down when you're ready,” Auston called out. I nodded in affirmative as I buried myself deeper into my blanket. It was the twins fifth birthday and I couldn't believe how much they had grown. I wanted to get ready so that I could go down and join them but truthfully I hadn't been feeling all too well lately. I laid in bed for another ten minutes as I felt waves of nausea come by but never felt the need to get up.

When I was finally starting to feel a little better I pulled myself out of the bed and made my way to the bathroom to brush my teeth and go pee. Once I was done I made my way down the stairs to hear my three boys cooking in the kitchen.

“Hmm smells nice in here,” I smiled as I walked over to Auston placing a quick kiss on his lips. The boys noticed calling out “ew” as they watched. I turned around with an evil smirk as I made my way over to them.

“Hi babies happy birthday,” I grinned, kneeling in front of them and reaching forward to place a kiss on both of their cheeks. This was one of the twins' first birthdays where we didn’t already have plans. Auston and I had decided that we would ask the twins what they wanted to do and decide from there.

“I want to go to a baseball game!” Kai said right away. Auston and I shared a quick look.

“No. Skate!” Noah denied as he took a bite of his pancakes that were in front of him.

“Don’t eat with your mouth open,” Auston scolded Noah as he turned the stove off. Noah’s mouth immediately snapped shut.

“Can we get a cat?” Kai asked for almost the fifth time in the last week. I looked up to share a look with Auston. We had been talking a lot about it ever since he started asking. We weren't sure at first because neither Auston or myself had ever had a cat before. We were also nervous about the idea of Felix not liking a cat in the home.

“Honey I’m not sure that’s such a good idea. We have Felix,” I told him as I placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Pleasee Charlie has Zues and a cat,” he pointed out as he glanced over to Auston.

“Well that’s true but getting another pet is a big responsibility and cats are very different from dogs,” A look of annoyance crossed Kai’s face for a quick second before relaxing again.

“I know Mama. I asked Charlie all about it. I can do it,” he reassured reaching out to grab my cheeks in his hand.

“I promise,” he said. I let out a small laugh as I reached up to tap his chin.

“I know bud,” I glanced up to look at Auston who was staring at us with a face of wonder.

“Papi can I have more bacon?” Noah asked looking over his chair to look at Auston.

“Yeah,” Auston slipped some bacon onto Noah's plate. When he was done he hovered for a moment before giving me the go ahead.

“Well if your sure that you can take care of a cat then we can go look to the shelter today,” I reached out and gave his shoulder a squeeze. He beamed at me as he hopped out of his seat.

“No way,” he exclaimed jumping up and down. Auston and I let out a laugh as we watched him.

“Way,” Auston teased reaching out to pat Kai on the back. Kai beamed up at Auston before wrapping his small arms around Austons legs. He pulled away and looked at Noah.

“C’mon Noah we have to get ready so we can get a cat,” Kai grabbed Noahs arm and started pulling on it.

“Kai, I’m eating,” Noah whined not moving from his position at the table.

“No we have to get ready so we can leave,” Kai insisted pulling harder. I sent Auston a worried glance as I noticed Noah getting annoyed.

“Kai how about you and I go get ready before Mama and Noah,” Auston suggested as he walked over to put the empty pan in the sink. Kai looked away from Noah to Auston as he let go of Noah.

“Okay Papi,” the two of them made their way out of the kitchen leaving me and Noah. I took a bite of my pancake as I waited out Noah. Out of Kai and Noah, Noah tended to act more like Auston while Kai was more similar to me.

“Mama,” Noah said after a moment. I smiled as I looked away from my food to him.

“Yeah baby?” I asked. He sat still for a moment before he shifted on his seat slightly.

“I really want to skate today,” he mumbled glancing away to look at his food again. I felt my heart ache at the sad tone to his statement.

“We can make that happen,” I told him as I pushed my plate further in front of me.

“Really?” he asked excitedly as he looked up from his food. I gave him a soft nod, his smile grew as he stood up from his chair.

“I’ll go get ready,” he exlcalimed before making his way out of the kitchen and up the stairs. I let out a soft sigh as I started picking all the dishes up. Once I had everything in the dishwasher I made my way upstairs to out bedroom.

“Noah wants to skate and I think we should do that first,” I told Auston as I entered our bedroom, he was just hopping out of the shower and had a towel tied around his waste. Auston gave a small nod as he walked further into the room.

“Are we really about to get a cat?” Auston asked once he was in the closet. I let out a sigh as I laid down on the bed.

“I guess.” Auston was quiet for a moment as he dressed himself. He walked out of the closet and over to the bed. He sat next to me wrapping his arm around me.

“I know nothing about cats,” Auston mumbled as he leaned his face into my neck.

“My freshman year roommate had a cat in our dorm. It was really gross to be honest. The litter box was really messy and smelled really bad. She never cleaned it though so but the cat liked me more then her. Also the wet food smelled terrible,” I ranted as I remembered the horrible time I lived in the dorm with a random roommate with a cat. Our room had smelled like the zoo always, I had spent most of that year spending time at my abusive exes because of how bad our room smelled.

“I read though that you can keep the litter box anywhere and we just have to make sure to clean up the poop which we do for Felix anyway. Now itll just force us to be more on top of cleaning that up inside and outside. I’m afraid of Felix being uncomfortable though,” I told Auston as I rubbed my hand up and down his arm.

“I asked Mitch about it he said he brought Zues with so they met before hand,” he mumbled as he pressed a kiss to my neck.

“Okay so will go skate somewhere and then come back then go to the shelter,” I listed as I pushed him away gently. He stared down at me with lust in his eyes.

“Okay,” he said. I pushed myself up from the bed. I needed to get dressed and ready.

----

“Papi can you help me” Kai called out as he tried to get his laces tied. When Noah and Kai were ready to play sports we got them involved in everything. They both picked out a favorite real quickly. Noah loved hockey and Kai loved baseball, they both tolerated the other sport but they had favorites.

“Mama are we going to see Charlie today?” Noah asked as he laced up his skates the best he could.

“I don’t know sweetie,” I told him as I kneeled in front of him to check on his laces. I helped him up from the bench once I was done. He grinned as he stood up.

“I’m ready,” he grinned as he made his way over to the ice. I followed closely behind, Auston and Kai were still sitting on the bench. I stepped out onto the ice before Noah. I steddied myself before turning to face Noah. At first when Auston and I had started dating I wasn’t all the great at skating. I had gotten better over the time that I had known Auston.

“Mama can we play hockey,” Noah questioned as we skated around the ice. I let out a soft laugh.

“I don’t have any hockey stuff baby,” I reached out and ruffled his hair. He huffed letting go of my hand to stop.

“Papi,” Noah called out as he truend around. Auston glanced up from Kai as the two stepped onto the ice.

“Yeah bud?” Auston asked as he held on to Kai’s hand. Kai was not very stedy on skates as Noah was.

“Can we play hockey?” he asked racing over to Auston and stopping right in front of him. My jaw dropped slightly at how well he was skating for five years old. Auston glanced over at me as he sent me a questioning look. I gave Auston a nod as I skated over to them reaching out for Kai to grab onto my arm.

Noah and Auston started playing some hockey on one side of the ice while Kai and I stayed in the safety of the other side. Kai let out a loud giggle as he watched Noah and Auston play.

“Mama, I want to go sit on the bench,” Kai said moments later as he got tired of skating. I quickly led us in the direction of the bench. We both sat down and watched Auston and Noah goof around.

----

“Mama, how much longer?” Kai asked as he tried to get more comfortable in his carseat.

“Not to long sweetie,” I reassured as I turned the music up just a little bit. After we were done skating we had stopped by and picked up Felix, we were now on our way to the foster home for kittens. Auston pulled up to the foster house and then put the car in park.

“I want a brown cat,” Kai said as he pulled his blanket up to his chin.

“Oh do you bud?” I asked with a small laugh. He gave a big nod as he stretched out. We had only been driving for thirty minutes. Felix sat up from where he was laying on the ground of the car. We both hopped out of the car and made our way to the back. I helped Kai out while Auston woke Noah up. When we were all out of the car we made our way to the front door. Auston was carrying a sleepy Noah but he reached out to ring the doorbel. Moments later the door was being pulled open and we came face to face with an older woman.

“Hi Lucy, I’m Amelia this is my husband Auston,” I smiled holding my hand out. She gave me a soft smile as she reached out to shake my hand.

“Come in, come in. Barney is getting all the kittens together right now,” she grinned as she let us into the house. My nose scrunched up at the smell slightly and causing a wave of nausea to flare up, I immediately got it under control. I grabbed onto Kai’s hand leading him into the house. Lucy lead us down to the basement where there was a group of small kittens laying down within a fence.

“We brought our dog, Felix,” I told Lucy as I helped Kai inside the fence. She nodded her head.

“Good that’ll be helpful to picking out what cat to get,” she told us as she handed a bag of treats to us.

“Why dont you go get him now,” she said turning to face Auston. He quickly nodded handing the sleepy Noah over to me. I held on to him tightly as Auston left the room. Noah let out a sigh as he snuggled closer.

“Mama look at this one,” Kai sighed as he held up a small brown kitten to me. I gave him a small smile as I reached out to pet the cat.

“That is Leo,” Lucy said as she handed a treat to Kai so he could give it to the cats.

“He might not be the best fit with a dog,” she trailed off looking at me. I nodded my head as I turned to face Kai.

“Who’s this?” I asked him as I picked up the cat that was sitting in his lap. He looked away from leo to the cat in his lap. He smiled softly as he looked down at the cat that was in his lap.

“That’s Shelia,” Lucy smiled as she reached out to push one of the cats into the pen. Kai let out a soft smile as he ran his hand through her fur. She cuddled up further into Kai. I let out a soft grin as I took the two of them in. They were so perfect.

“Alright here’s Felix,” Auston grinned as he made his way into the room with Felix. Noah stirred in my arms before asking me to let him down. I listened to him setting him next to Kai. Auston walked up next to me and wrapped his arm around my waist pulling me in. Felix started sniffing at the gate door where the cats were with Kai. One of the cats hissed loudly reaching its arm out of the gate Felix let out a loud bark as he backed up.

“Yeah some of them really don’t like dogs but a few of them do. We have dogs ourself so they are used to having a dog around. Just some can be a little aggressive about it,” she told us as she reached in to pick up the cat that hissed at Felix. I shared a look with Auston before I kneeled down in front of the gate.

“Noah do you want to meet the cats?” I asked softly as I set him on the ground. He pulled his face out of my neck to look at Kai surrounded by the cats.

“Okay Mommy,” he mumbled as he let go of me. I helped him inside the gate and he joined Kai. The cat that was sitting in Kai’s lap glanced at Noah and then back at Kai. She gave a confused look as she looked between the two again. I let out a small laugh at her confusion. She hopped up from Kai’s lap and started smelling Noah.

“Shelia is pretty,” Kai mumbled reaching out to pet her again. She leaned into his touch.

“Yeah she is baby,” I grinned. I pushed myself up so I could face Auston and Lucy.

“Should we introduce her to Felix?” I asked Auston with a raised eyebrow. He glanced down at where Felix was sat behind his legs.

“How about you take her out of there so the other cats don’t go crazy,” Lucy suggested. I smiled as I helped Noah out of the gated off area. Once he was out I helped Kai. The three of us walked over to Auston and Felix. The cat let out a soft meow from Kai’s arms.

“Mama. Can we have her?” Kai asked as he sat down in front of Felix. I held my breath as Felix walked over to sniff the two of them timidly. The cat looked visibly shooken for a second before doing her own sniff test on Felix. I sent Auston a questioning look. Where we really about to buy a cat? He sent me back a look of his own shrugging his shoulders as he lowered himself to the ground between Felix and Shelia.

“If your sure shes what you want,” I answered after a moment. Kai and Noah both looked at me eagerly as they nodded their heads.

“Yes!” Kai exclaimed reaching out to throw his arms around my leg. I let out a soft laugh as I glanced to Lucy.

“Will take her,” I grinned as I reached down my hand to run it through Kai’s soft hair.

“Oh perfect I’ll go get the paper work now,” she smild before darting up the stairs leaving us alone. I sat down next to my boys.

“Mama?” Noah questioned as he looked away from the kitten to me.

“Yeah baby?”

“Do we have to keep her name Shelia or can we change it?” he asked.

“We can do whatever you boys want,” I told him reaching out to rub his back.

“Okay Papi what should we name her?” Noah asked turning to Auston. I let out a loud laugh at Auston’s shocked face.

“I dont know why are you asking me?” he questioned as he rached out to rub Felix behind his ear. Shelia and Felix seemed to be getting along, I noticed.

“Mama said you named Felix,” Noah stated as he pointed to Felix. I sent Auston a baffled look. I had told the twins about that so long, at the time I wasnt even sure if they were listening.

“Well yeah I did but that’s because I got him when I didn’t know mama,” Auston told him as he reached out to ruffle his hair. Noah batted his hand away with a laugh.

“Do you guys like any names?” I asked them as I reached out to pet the cat myself. Kai looked thoughtful as he stared down at the kitten while Noah looked back and forth between the two of us before exgrataedly throwing his arms up in the air.

“If I had names would I be asking,” he declared. Auston laughed at our dramatic sun causing him to pout in Auston’s direction.

“Papi dont laugh at me im in crisis,” he whined laying back so his head rested in Auston’s lap causing all the adults in the room to laugh.

“Crisis whered you get that from?” Auston reached his hand down to run it through Noah’s hair again. This time Noah relaxed into the touch.

“Mitch,” Noah responded causing Auston to let out a snort. Of course Mitch.

“What about Holly,” Noah muttered as he pushed himself up into a sitting position. Kai glanced up from the cat with a look of disgust.

“No,” Kai responded before Auston or I could say anything.

“Rebecca,” Noah suggested. Kai stared at him for a moment before looking back down at the kitten.

“We aren’t naming our cat after Rebecca,” Kai scolded Noah. I shared a quick questioning look with Auston. Who was Rebecca?

“Well what should we name her then,” Noah asked annoyance seeping into his tone.

“Here’s the paperwork,” Lucy smiled holding it up. Auston pushed himself off the floor so he could go take care of that. Around fifteen minutes later Auston made his way back into the room.

“She’s officially ours,” he announced. Kai cheered as he struggled to stand up with her still in his arms. I reached out to help him so he wouldnt fall.

“Can we go home now?” he asked excitedly. I nodded my head as I helped Noah up next.

“Yeah let’s go.”

We all walked out and hopped in the car.

“Everyone buckled?” Auston asked as he put the car in drive. We all said yes and he started the drive home.

“Mama!” Kai called out slightly panicked causing me to turn around quickly so I could see what was going on.

“I don’t think she likes the car,” He said as he held her away from his body. My eyes zeroed in on her sharp claws that were coming out. Shit.

“Okay um. Put her down,” I told him. He looked at me with wide eyes probably not sure how to do it without either one of them getting hurt.

“Auston pull over,” I told him. He let out a sigh as he did what I said. Once we were on the shoulder I hopped out of the car and opened Kais door. I reached in and grabbed the cat from Kai’s hands. She scratched at me right away causing me to let out a soft ‘ow’ but I held her tight and she calmed down.

“Mama your bleeding,” Kai cried out as he reached for my arm. I pulled away before he could touch and make a mess.

“It’s okay. I’m fine,” I reassured him as I shut his door. I climbed back into the car with the cat cuddled tightly against my chest.

“Your bleeding?” Auston asked reaching out but I shook my head no.

“It’s fine she scratched me just drive so we can be home,” I told him a little snappily. He glanced at me confused for a moment but nodded his head and merged back onto the road.

“Sorry,” I mumbled over the music. Auston glanced at me for a moment staying silent.

“I’m just really tired. I didn’t mean to sound so snappy,” I told him softly.

“You’ve been really tired a lot lately,” he stated as he reached over to rest his hand on my thigh. I let out a sigh as I leaned my head back against the headrest.

----

“Babe c’mon wake up,” Auston told me as he rubbed his hand up and down my thigh. I jolted awake to see that we were parked in our garage the kitten still cuddled to my body.

“Were home?” I asked looking around. He nodded as he stepped back from the door and helped me out of the car.

“Are you okay? You completely passed out on the way home,” his asked concern seeping into his voice. I nodded as I hopped out of the car. We both made our way into the house the boys already running into the living room with Felix hot on their heels. I leaned down and put the cat on the ground before slipping out of my shoes. When I was standing up straight Austons arm wrapped around my waist.

“Babe whats going on?” he asked as he pressed a kiss to the top of my head. I relaxed into his hold leaning my body weight against him. I was honestly just so exhausted all I wanted to do was lay down.

“I’m fine. I just havent been sleeping well,” I let us hug for another few moments before pulling away so that I could walk into the living room.

“Hi boys,” I smiled at them as I sat on the couch. Auston went to let Felix out into the backyard while the boys sat on the floor with the cat in the middle of them.

“Have we settled on a name?” Auston asked as he walked into the living room Felix following him. Auston sat on the couch lifting my legs up before dropping them into his laugh. His hands started giving my feet a massage causing me to let out a deep breath as I felt myself getting more tired.

“Mama,” Noah called out climbing onto the couch so that he was between my body and the couch.

“Yeah baby?” I mumbled out.

“Can I nap with you?” he asked as he cuddled into me wrapping his little arm around my stomach.

“Of course.”

“No,” Kai said walking over and tugging on my arm slightly aggressively.

“Kai dont pull on your mothers arm like that,” Auston told him sternly. Kai mumbled an apology as he sat on the ground again.

“You can’t nap until we name her,” he said sadly.

“Okay,” I pushed myself up slightly so that I could wake up a bit.

“What about Sandy?” I suggested. Kai shook his head no as he moved the feather around for the cat.

“Sarah,” Noah mumbled into my hip.

“No.”

“Bud you can’t turn everything down without giving any suggestions,” Auston told him softly. A soft pout took over Kais face as pulled the cat onto his chest as he laid on the ground.

“When I was a little girl I had a stuffed animal that my mother gave me named Sunshine,” I started to say only to be cut off by a small gasp.

“Sunshine,” Kai grinned causing me to send him a soft smile of my own.

“Yeah you like that?” I asked. He giggled as he looked down at the cat.

“Yeah. Noah do you like it?” Kai asked looking over to his brother.

“Sure.. I want to sleep,” Noah mumbled.

“Why don’t Mama and Noah go upstairs to nap and me and you put on a movie,” Auston suggested to Kai.

“I want to watch a movie too,” Noah sleepliy reached up to rub his eyes with his small fist.

“Cars,” they both answered when Auston asked what they wanted to watch. I drifted off with a smile on my face.

----

I groaned as I turned my face further into the couch cusion. I felt Noah’s knee digging into my lower back. I slowly blinked my eyes open glancing at the tv. It was playing the end credits of the movie while Auston and Kai were no longer in the room. I felt a wave of nausea hit causing me to push myself up. After a moment it wasnt passing so I took off for the closest bathroom.

“Mama are you okay?” Noah asked as he walked into the bathroom. I shook my head not wanting him to see me like this.

“Go get your father,” I told him through my gagging. Noah left following direction right away and not even five minutes later Auston was standing at the door.

“Hey,” Auston shushed as he crowded behind me pulling my hair back.

“Your okay,” he rubbed his hand up and down my back gently.

“Papi,” Noah called from outside of the bathroom. I took a deep breath as I leaned away from the toilet feeling done.

“Yeah bud?” Auston called out.

“Is Mama okay?” he asked quietly. I felt my heart break at his tone. I shakily pushed myself up and made my way over to the door. I pulled it open to see Kai and Noah standing there.

“Mama’s fine,” I reassured them as I reached out to ruffle their hair.

“I am going to go upstairs and brush my teeth and then will make dinner,” I told them. They both nodded their heads before running off to the living room.

“Babe,” Auston sighed as his hand slipped to my waist. I leaned my head against his chest as I took a deep breath of my own.

“Get started. I’ll be right down,” I squezzed him tightly before letting go and making my way upstairs. I knew that Auston was starting to get frustrated, it was ovibous that something was wrong but I didn’t know what exactly. I made my way into the bathroom once I was in our room and to my cabinet. I reached into the back and pulled out the extra pregnancy test I had stored in the back.

I let out a shaky breath as I opened the packet. I wasnt sure but I was feeling the exact same way I had felt when I was pregnant with the twins. The throwing up and the tiredness was leading me to believe that it was maybe something more then the flu. I followed the instructions on the test and then set it on the counter as I set the five minute timer.

Truthfully I was nervous about what the test was going to say. Auston and I hadnt really had a chance to talk about if we wanted to have more kids or not. We were so lucky to have even fall pregnant in the first place and when we found out it was twins we were delighted. I wasnt sure how Auston would react if I was pregnant again. The timer on my phone went off.

I took a deep breath as I made my way back into the bathroom to look at the test.

----

“Papi. Is Mama okay?” I heard Noah ask Auston as I got to the end of the stairs. I tiptoed my way over to the entrance of the kitchen.

“Yeah bud she’s just really tired,” he told him reaching out to tap his shoulder. The three of them were at the counter getting dinner ready. Auston was cutting something up on the cutting board while Auston had given the twins a bowl filled with something that they were tasked with mixing.

“But she was throwing up,” Kai pointed out.

“Rebeccas mom was throwing up and then she went to the hospital,” Noah mumbled loudly enough for everyone to hear. I felt my heart break at the boys concern. Auston stopped his cutting and set the knife down and leaned forward.

“Alright little doods listen. Rebeccas mom was a different situation. Mama has just been really tired because it’s the end of the season and she needs help. When I’m away for my games she gets tired. She needs a really big nap,” he told them.

“I could nap with her,” Kai said comfortably. Auston nodded his head seriously.

“Good. this will work. What about you Noah?” Auston asked with a grin.

“Yes!” Noah nodded his head enthusiastically.

“Hi boys,” I called as I walked into the kitchen. Noah and Kai grinned happily while Auston sent me a worried look.

“I hid a present for both of you in your room with a bow. Go find it,” I told them with a smile. They both jumped out of their chair excitedly as they ran towards the stairs. Auston stared at me in shock for a moment.

“You just stole my helpers,” he told me. I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his stomach once I was standing behind him. I rested my chin on his back.

“I’m pregnant,” I mumbled. He stopped what he was doing as he slowly turned around.

“What?” he asked softly.

“I uh just took a test. I’m pregnant,” I let a small smile out hoping he would be happy about this.

“Oh my god,” he leaned forward and pressed a deep kiss to my lips, I gasped in shock allowing him to slip his tongue in. I pulled back so that I could rest my forehead against his.

“I’ll have to set up an appointment to know for sure but yeah,” I told him. His grin widened as he pulled me in tighter so that he could hug me.

“No way,” Noah screamed. I let out a soft laugh.

“Must have found his gift.” Auston laughed as he leaned forward again to connect our lips.

A.N: Surprise! So I really just started writing this because I wanted the Matthews family to have a cat and then it somehow turned into this whole thing?? Anyway I hope y'all enjoyed!

#auston matthews #auston matthews fanfic #auston matthews imagine #auston matthews fic #auston matthews x reader #Hockey Fanfiction #hockey fic #hockey imagine #nhl fic #nhl imagine #nhl writing #nhl x reader #toronto maple leafs imagine #toronto maple leafs fic #toronto maple leafs fanfic

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imasimpforyumeko · 3 years

Text

¨We arent done...¨ levi x y/n

Warning: smut, sex, dirty talk, NSFW

this is pretty old too from my other account i edited it (well tried to)

levi ackerman

You haven’t seen Levi in 2 weeks because him and his squad had gone on another mission because they had found more titans.You sighed at the thought of him not being there you missed him.Levi was always the one cleaning so when he left the house was extremely messy.There were sheets all over the floor in the bedroom, towels, just a mess.You knew that if Levi could come at any time but you left the house that way.¨Eh ill clean it later.¨ you said brushing it off.An hour later you never did.Levi also hated when

you touched yourself calling you a naughty girl and that you shouldn’t be touching what was his.You ended up making the bed and laying down to watch a little TV.you searched for a good movie to watch on Netflix and came across 365 days.you watched it calmly until the first sex scene came on.You had gotten wet thinking of Levi.Then the boat scene came on.Your panties were wet but tried to ignore it, But you got to the point where you couldnt take it anymore.You got out of bed and went for the pink vibrator that

you had hidden from Levi Because you knew if Levi would’ve found it you would’ve been in a lot of trouble.You spread your legs open and touched your needy clit turning the vibrator all the way up.You knew that if Levi came into the room he would’ve been pissed.But you took the riskYou tried to keep your moans quiet but no matter what you did it was no use.You heard someone open the window into the bathroom and thought it was the neighbors and not yours so you continued but very cautiously until you realized the only person that goes into the house that way was Levi.But by the time you realized

that it was too late.Levi had caught you.¨And what do you think your doing touching what belongs to me?you greedy little slut¨levi said in a devilish tone.Your whole body had got goosebumps and you froze. ¨And look at this bathroom! It’s a mess! Levi said picking up a pair of your socks off the bathroom floor.Levi walked up to you and whispered in your ear ¨What a naughty girl youve been while daddy was gone I see my absents made you forgot the rules but youll remember them by the end of the night.¨you had got wet from hearing his voice in so long.Levi threw the pink vibrator on the floor.¨go clean the bathroom or else you will get a punishment and if I catch you again itll be a lot

worse¨levi said with a evil grin on his face.Levi put you down.You immediately went to the bathroom.you started off with the shower you had bend over arching your back teasing him to. he caught on quickly and levi walked into the bathroom to watch you clean.he mumbled ¨but you know....¨ you brushed it off because you didn’t understand him and continued to clean. ¨thats, not the only thing youll be cleaning tonight¨you turned to see him looking you up and down with a devilish grin on his face. ¨i´d love to see that-¨ not taking him seriously. Before you could even finish your sentence he

moved your underwear and jammed his finger inside of you feeling your spongy insides with his finger. you grunted as you felt him inside of you ¨Youve been a very naughty girl and now its time for your punishment.¨ ¨i missed you while i was gone but you made daddy upset when he caught you touching what belongs to him¨ levi pulled his finger out your insides. you moaned softly as you felt him remove his finger.Levi flipped you over on your back infront of him looking at you licking his lips rubbing your nipples with his

fingers twisting them gently admiring your sexy body.you squirmed a little biting your lip.while he inserted your nipple inside of his mouth while rubbing your clit with his thumb.Your eyes rolling to the back of your head. After a few minutes, Levi removed your nipple and started kissing your neck.As he was kissing your neck he whispered good enough to where you could hear him ¨Now be a good girl for daddy while punishes

you.¨levi was breathing hard and his words made you whine.Levi then inserted 2 fingers into your needy pussy using his fingers that were the longest.making his pace fast thrusting his fingers inside of you. L-Levi please give me your c-cock¨as soon as you finished your sentence you felt Levi fastening his pace adding another finger. biting your ear gently whispering¨Now Now little kitten you know daddy hates it when you impatient and you’ve been a bad girl¨As your walls suffocated levis fingers fastening his pace he

knew you were about to cum, Levi removed his fingers licking them.¨Nu-uh not yet darling if you want daddys cock your gonna have to beg more than that¨He was teasing you and was loving every second of it.Levi spread your legs out more and positioned his

head infront of your area rubbing his thumb on your clit.You had a hard time spitting out your words so it kinda came out like this L-Levi I want you to f-fuck me¨ sorry y/n but daddys just getting started.¨ feeling his breathing on your desperate pussy you whimpered.levi started licking your folds and your back arched up as he continued looking up at you.¨L-levi please¨you said whiney like biting your numb bottom lip.Levi then continued but a lot rougher. ¨L-LEVI i-im gonna-¨You cummed all over his tongue

on his face and on your stomach. ¨Now look at this mess you made y/n~ it’s ok daddy will take care of it¨levi said licking your juice off his face ¨you ready?¨he asked softly.you nodded watching him prepare to wreck your insides.Levi pulled down his pants revealing the tent his dick made inside of his boxers.Pulling down his boxers he slid into you leaving you moaning loudly as he entered you eyes rolling to the back of your

head.As levi was inside of you your insides squezzed his cock causing him to groaned thrusting his hips making his pace rough and fast. your back once again arching your back moaning louder than you did before. As you reached your climax screaming his name.¨F-fuck keep going b-baby k-keep squeezing my c-cock.¨levi said you moaned to his words levi grabbed your hips fastening his pace even more.¨L-LEVI IM

CUMMING¨you watched your juices running down levis cock. ¨Your my little slut n-nobody e-elses¨ you felt levi reaching his climax too ¨be prepared d-darling¨ You whined all the way until he released. ¨FUCK y\n you’re so fucking tight! Levi moaned. tears watered your eyes ¨i- l-love you levi¨ ¨i love you too d-darling¨levi replied painting

your walls with his juice. Levi removing his cock from your twitching pussy watching his juices come out of you. Levi smiled looking at your filled pussy¨Oh and you’re not done y/n were just getting started~¨

#levi ackerman #aot #levi x y/n

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radink333 · 4 years

Text

this is the moment you all have been waiting for

the fanfic i make from this headcanon/fan theory

let’s goo 😼

(So basically Joyce and the other adults go and find hopper in Russia and leave the kids and J - N alone, where i put is a abandoned warehouse :) )

(i kinda aldo couldn’t add any byler stuff to the fanfic because it’ll seem to, i guess, pushy? it doesn’t add up with the fanfic 😻)

also trigger warning ❤️

——————————————————————————

Jonathan and Nancy are trying to protect the kids from any mindflayer/demegorgon creature. Nancy keeps a eye out for all the kids but Jonathan is only keeping his eyes on his little brother. His baby brother that has been traumatized all his life. Will is holding his hands together trying to calm himself down.

Everyone felt a shake coming from the ground. A shake that caused some gravel dust from the walls to fall off onto the gray ground. They all went to the right of the warehouse looking for safety. Everyone except Will. The small boy ran to the left of the big building leaving everyone behind, nobody noticed until they were half way through the hallways when Jonathan was looking around for his smaller brother. When he realized he wasn’t there he freaked out, he basically went into cardiac arrest when he couldn’t find him.

There was a large bang coming from the room where they just were, that’s when Jonathan heard it. A whistle tune playing, but not just any tune. A little song Will and Jonathan’s dad use to whistle when he got home from work, the song is usually whistled when he’s in a bad mood or ticked off.

The taller male ran back to the rim of the door of the lobby area where they just were in to see his father, Lonnie Byers, bat in one hand, and ropes in the other, Jonathan didn’t know what his dad was gonna do with them but all he knew is it was for something bad, very bad.

Will was running as fast as he could down the hallway, which isn’t very fast, until he fell, hitting his knee on the hard cement ground. He let out a small squeak in pain but soon covered his mouth so he wouldn’t get caught by the thing, which he doesn’t know, that is after them. Will now notices that he’s alone too, much terrifies him. Much so where he tries to get up and run again, farther away then ever. Soon he realizes he can’t due to the pain in his knee. He now hears a familiar sound. A sound that can’t be unforgettable. His father’s signature whistle he sung right before he would yell at his family or hurt his family. It’s always when his father is done with work too.

Jonathan sees his father turn to the left, right where Will turned. The male literally almost passed out on the ground right then and there, he wishes he could’ve to get his fathers attention so he wouldn’t go hurt his baby brother, but he didn’t. Lonnie walks past multiple doors and rooms until he sees a small figure laying on the ground across the hallway.

“Hey kid, Time to visit papa” The large man said raising his arms now speed walking. Will began screaming at the top of his lungs for help, screaming for his friends, screaming for his big brother. He was scared.

Lonnie finally got up to Will, who was still on the ground in pain when Lonnie grabs him by the wrists and pulled him up.

“Why didn’t you visit me son, I was so sad. So sad.” his father stated in a sacastic scary voice while trying to get grip of his youngest son where he can get him out of the building and to the Russians.

Jonathan is running through the lobby and running through the hallways while hearing his little brother screaming for help, screaming for Jonathan, it makes Jonathan scared for his baby brother to be this terrified. The 18 year old man picks up a piece of broken glass and runs towards a wall before turning, he sees his father gipping onto Will while he is on the group whaling for help and crying uncontrollably, scared out of his mind.

Jonathan ran as fast as he could to his father and brother and jabbed the sharp piece of glass in his dads back. He got it out and pushed Lonnie to the ground and beat him up until hi was knocked out.

Jonathan got up and walked to his little brother and crouched down. Will’s eyes were blood shot and puffed up from all the crying. Jonathan reached over and held his baby brother in his arms, shushing him itll be alright and nobody could hurt him anymore.

Everybody ran to where Jonathan and Will were to see Lonnie knocked out on the floor, Jonathan holding Will in his arms trying to calm him down after his father tried doing to him.

“Did you hurt yourself?” The older male asked to his younger brother. “On my knee yeah.” Will said pointing at his right knee. Jonathan saw the huge bruise that was left on his little brothers knee and stated “We’ll get it fixed, come on guys, let’s go to the store.” he got up and pulled his little brother up but held him by his shoulder so he wouldn’t need to walk.

“Thank you Jonathan” Will said looking at his older brother smiling weakly.

#stranger things #will byers #jonathan byers #will byers and jonathan byers #mike wheeler #eleven #the party #lonnie byers #stranger things 4 #stranger things tweets #Byers Family

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hermannsthumb · 4 years

Note

63 for winter prompt please! So cute?!!!

63. I’m walking home from the bar and it’s snowing and you see me trying to catch snowflakes on my tongue

from winter writing prompts here

happy christmas eve!!! though i have a feeling by the time i finish this up and post it itll be christmas day :) i imagine this one taking place pre-relationship and pre-moving off to hong kong--i know its prob slightly contradictory w canon but i like the idea of them being shuttled between ksci labs for a while

-------------

“I can’t believe it’s actually snowing,” Newt says. “This is some, like, stupid Hallmark level bullshit. It never actually snows on Christmas.”

“One finds it tends to in Alaska,” Hermann says.

Newt ignores him in favor of spreading his arms out and twirling around in a circle, enjoying the sting of the freezing night air and the snowflakes on his cheeks after a night of being crammed in the corner of a stuffy pub. And, yeah, Hermann does have a point, snow is hardly new in Anchorage--they trudged through a few feet of it for dinner just earlier tonight--but Newt’s had a few drinks and is feeling good. He’s feeling good about the snow especially.

He twirls around again, grins, slings an arm around Hermann’s shoulders. Hermann makes a disgruntled little noise and stiffens up. “Yeah, whatever,” Newt says. “Don’t spoil it.”

“I’m not spoiling it,” Hermann says, “I’m merely pointing out--”

“Nope,” Newt says. He squeezes Hermann’s bicep to indicate he should shut up quickly. Or, at least, he squeezes at where Hermann’s bicep presumably rests beneath his ridiculous amount of layers (parka, two sweaters, an undershirt). It just sorta of feels like a squishy pillow.

Hermann jerks away from him with a scowl, hood falling down over his eyes. “You barely even celebrate the bloody holiday in the first place. Why do you care?”

And, yeah, that’s true--Newt wasn’t really raised anything, and the crass commercialism of Christmas usually makes his skin crawl, but, god damn it, even Boston couldn’t make him sick of snow. “It’s not that it’s Christmas,” he says, “it’s just--it’s snowing. Look around. Everything looks...pretty.”

The twinkling lights strung up everywhere look pretty in the snow. The old-fashioned lampposts look pretty in the snow. The occasional pine trees on street corners look pretty in the snow. It’s quiet, too, best of all--even the noise from the raucous pub they just left seems subdued, and there’s no one on the street but the two of them. “Pretty,” Hermann echoes.

Hermann looks pretty in the snow, too: snowflakes catching in his long eyelashes, cheeks flushed pink, nose red, white puffs of breath escaping between his thin, wide lips--lips which curl into a smile, slowly, as he gazes around on Newt’s instructions.

Newt’s chest tightens with affection. He wants to take a picture and capture that little half-smile forever; he wants to swoop forward and kiss Hermann senseless, and feel it grow beneath his own lips. “C’mon,” he says instead, ducking away so Hermann can’t see his blush. This is Hermann they’re talking about here. If Newt ever tried to kiss Hermann Hermann would probably, like, smack him across the face or something. “I’m, uh, getting cold.”

He trudges ahead, occasionally reaching up to swipe snow off his glasses. It takes him a few seconds to realize Hermann isn’t following.

“Hermann?” he calls, turning.

Hermann is standing right where Newt left him, tongue stuck out, head tossed back; he’s trying to catch snowflakes. He doesn’t hear Newt.

“Oh,” Newt squeaks, so in love it hurts. He might have to reevaluate his policy about never kissing Hermann. “That’s--take your time. Cool.”

#newmann #maria's fanfiction tag #Anonymous

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seblore · 3 years

Note

everyday i wake up and you still havent posted your evermore rant </3

there u go boo 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

GDBDNSKDJHHDDNDS GIRL................ ok so i very cleverly avoided ranking folklore because every song REALLY HIT and the whole album was just SO.. SO.. yeah. i can however rank miss evermore. i dont want to compare the two album i do not get the point in that. both give off really different vibes. now what i will say is with folklore, AS AN ALBUM, it is just a master masterpiece. The songs flowed amazingly with each other and really held you close the entire first listen. at least thats what I felt like <3 with evermore however, the individual songs are OMG!!! THERE IS LITERALLY NO SONG I DONT LIKE FROM ANY OF THE TWO ALBUMS. but as an album on the first listen i did feel a bit disconnected from evermore which didnt happen to me with folklore. why i think that might’ve happened is BECAUSE taylor is just so brilliant m8.... the MASSIVE contrasting emotions between the songs was too much for my little brain to handle.

Ok so now that’s out of the way dhsjsk time for rankings :) i have no idea where im going to put each song im just going to make it up as we go <3 ill ALSO give you my fave lyrics from each if I remember it <333 (oh and also you’ll notice marjorie isnt here. im sorry but i never listened to it after the first listen because it hits a little too close to home and i dont want to unpack all of that now im sorry! it is a beautiful song)

14. Closure: she popped off <3 she really said dont treat me like a situation that needs to be handled 💃🤙💯 a beautiful song with beautiful lyrics HOWEVER its the first song i couldnt connect with thus it’s down here BUT I STILL WOULD LISTEN TO IT ON REPEAT THO... the last in my ranking but still fucks 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ thats taylor swift 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

13. long story short: i have never been in a relationship ever BUT GODDAMN ‘pushed from the precipice, clung to the nearest lips’ hdjsksksjjddjnBbdns jddd ubebs!:!?:?:$3&39383$hzjs WOAH.... and this bitch really summarized the full 2016 drama with long story short it was a bad time. HILARITY. yeah not much to say here tho this is just the ‘at least one mandatory song to shake your tits to on each ts album’ song of evermore <3 and always remember that if the shoe fits walk in it TILL YOUR HIGH HEELS BREAK WOOH ANDIFELLDOWNTHEPEDESTALRIGHTDOWNTHERA—

12: dorothea: making a lark of misery :D RENt free. i had to listen to ‘if youre tired of being known for who you know you know youll always know me’ 113 times to finally understand it tho 😐 some of us are stupid and illiterate have you ever thought about that miss swift???? anyways TINGTINGTINGINGINGING THE STARS IN YOUR EYES SHINED BRIGHTER IN TUPELO <33333 such an innocent feel good song I LOVE!!!!!

11. ivy: the goddamn here and the hush of mirrorball ARE THE REASON IM STILL ALIVE 😽 another lyrical masterclass <3 ‘id live and die for moments that we stole on begged and borrowed time’ IS2G!!!!!!!!!!! anyways what if you cheated on your husband with me and i cheated on my husband with you and my pain fit in the palm of your freezing hands 😳 JK JK 😅 unless...... 🤪😏 hdjsks yeah this song is magnificently cursed and i am in love with it 🧎‍♀️

10. tis the damn season: this song is august but the other side of the coin. august but four months later. AUGUST SLIPPED AWAY LIKE A BOTTLE OF WINE- THE HOLIDAYS LINGER LIKE A BAD PERFUMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE... she sounds so pretty goshhh! ‘time flies messy as the mud on your truck tires NOW IM MISSING YOUR SMILE hear me out we could just ride around and the road not taken looks real good now’ is on repeat in my mind. and as always the bridge ::::::::::::::.............:::::::::::::: how does she do this everytime. ‘and wonder about the only soul who can tell which smiles im faking’ 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ after every ts song i listen my expectations about true love grows exponentially and my chances of finding true love falls exponentially simultaneously ADIEU.

9. willow: she really took the invisible string quartet and put it in huh..................... FUCKED IN THE HEADDDDDDDDDDDDDD. what can i say <3 its just such a pretty song <3 hashtag gorgeous hashtag i cant say anything to its face. WRECK MY PLANS!!!!!! WRECK IT BITCH!!! ‘wait for the signal and ill meet you after dark’ LOVE STORY WHIPLASH. also mate i cant even focus on the song she looks SO GOOD in the music video i—

8. happiness: !!!! what can i say.... one of the best songs of the album hands down. lyrical masterpiece AND musically rich. she really logged into tumblr dot com and typed out ‘THERE’LL BE HAPPINESS AFTER YOU’ AND ‘THERE WAS HAPPINESS BECAUSE OF YOU’ ARE IDEAS THAT CAN COEXIST and logged off...... h8 her and her insanity. the one word i have to describe this song is: picturesque. tis a picturesque song <3 oh and dfbhhffcbhDDVHHTRSDVJK when i heard ‘i hope she’ll be a beautiful fool who takes my spot next to you’ i audibly GASPED and then she says ‘no i didnt mean that sorry i cant see facts through all of my fury’................. i fell out of my chair. IT FELT LIKE AS IF SHE HEARD MY GASP AND TOLD ME SPECIFICALLY THAT NO SHE DIDNT MEAN IT LIKE THAT... anyways yeah. ill write an article one day named THE SWIFT DECEPTION OF TAYLOR about how she keeps writing songs with deceptive titles and this will be the opening case 😈🤙 also the fact that this is one of my faves and i put it in number 8 says a lot......

7. evermore: i havent recovered from ‘motion capture. put me in a bad light’. i mean come on the whole goddamn song is a lyrical masterpiece. ‘writing letters addressed to the fire’. IS SHE OK!????????????? i think tf not. beautiful song beautiful arrangement. iver sounded really good too. and lol lol rofl WOOFWOOFbarkbark ‘HEY DECEMBER GUESS IM FEELING UNMOORED’ unmoored definition from google dot com: no longer attached. she doesn’t go back to december anymore. about2 faint oml. long story short: i did not survive. THIS PAIN WOULD BE FOR EVERMORE........ what i felt with this song is that she took the quarantine sadness we all felt at least once this year and made it into a masterpiece of a song. couldve been easily the top song on any album except this. no i will not elaborate <3

6. no body no crime: i cannot believe. she teased us with a musical number. this woman teased us with. a musical number. I THINK SHE IS WRITING A MUSICAL BUT I JUST CANT PROVE IT! when she wins that tony 16 years later call me prophetic xoxo. anyways yeah she literally wrote this to flex her storytelling abilities. send tweet 🐥

5. cowboy like me: YEEEHAWWW I’LL BE HONEST WITH YOU I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT THE FULL SONG SOUNDS LIKE I JUST HAVE THE BRIDGE ON REPEAT!!!! OMFG!!! the skeletons in both our closets plotted hard to fuck this up. AAAA!! ??? STFU. IM NOT EVEN TALKING ABOUT THE LYRICS MATE THE WAY ITS SUNG!!!!!!! GUT WRENCHING! the best bridge she has ever written musically. i cant stop listening to it. REALLYYY DID BELIEEEVE I WAS THE ONEEE. STORIESSS ABOUT WHEEEN YOU PASSSEDDD THROUGHH TOWN. y e l l. and then she hits me with ‘now you hang from my lips like the gardens of babylon.’ L ???? M !!!!! A $$$$$ O “”””” i had to pause it and sit there for 10 minutes to take in what i had just heard. case closed critical hit sustained yeedhawd.

4. tolerate it: i cried. the only reason it’s not 1 is because it hurt me too much. WHAT THE FUCK YOU MF YOU ASSUME IM FINE BUT WYD IF I BREAK FREE AND LEAVE US IN THE RUINS???? TOOK THIS DAGGER IN ME AND REMOV— m8 this physically hurts me everytime. if its all in my head TELL ME RN. aghhh aRghhhhhhh. pain. and lol she broke down sleep to its bare essentials ‘breathing with your eyes closed’.

3. ??? coney island: i know it’s a bit of a controversial top three but WHO CARES 🕴this is solely here for ‘AND IM SITTING ON A BENCH IN CONEY ISLAND wondering where did my BABYy GO’ im shaking. my bed is shaking. my body is shaking. my pupils are shaking. THE WAY SHE SINGS IT OH MY GOODNESS ME i have to lie down gimme a sec. ‘and if this is the long haul howd we get here so soon 😟’ SCREAM. and when i was hearing it for the first time and she said ‘sorry for not making you my centerfold’ i was like yeah and?? so what?? and then she hits me with ‘over and over’...... so she didnt make him/her/them her centerfold over and over !!!!!!! she is sorry she didnt do it over and over!!!!!! mannn.... the chorus.. i shall not speak. i am held at gunpoint i CANNOT SPEAK. the bridge tho dhdnsksksjsb I CAN SPEAK AND I SHALL SPEAK. BITCH WENT OFFFFFFFF. <3 this is the apology she deserved from her exes which she never got so she wrote it herself. podium. grey skies. birthday cake. ACCIDENT. im laughingggggggggggg <///3 and yeah so overall it is a really yummy song with yummy vocals and yummy arrangement 9/10 would recommend. also!! life lessons kids life lessons. disappointments? SIMPLY CLOSE YOUR EYES AND PRETEND YOU DO NOT SEE IT YAAAAAAAAAS

2. gold rush: ETHEREAL!!!!!! The last time i felt like this™️ whilst listening to a song was with mirrorball <3 the production of this song omg omg omg LOVE 💃 but what propelled it to number two status was the ‘i dont like slow motion double vision in ROSE BLUSH/ i dont like that falling feels like flying till the BONE CRUSH’ imagine how fucked in the head a person needs to be to rhyme rose blush with bone crush. yeah i have nothing more to say really this song is extremely gorgeous and ‘eyes like sinking ships on water so inviting i almost jumped in’ / ‘walk past quick brush’ ?:!:!&:8483 F A V E <33333 and the transition transmission transfusion from ‘... gray old tea cuz itll never be ᵍˡᵉᵃᵃᵃᵃᵐⁱⁿᵍ ᵗʷⁱⁿᵏˡⁱⁿᵍᵍᵍᵍ’ MADAME

1. champagne problems: are we surprised? ARE WE REALLY SURPRISED? when listening to new albums i normally listen to it at one go in order. i stick to that rule. HOWEVER after many years of my solid album listening self made rule tm i finally broke and immediately replayed this mf song after listening to it once. ‘you had a speech, youre speechless/ love slipped beyond your reaches’???? stfu???? VILE. PUNISHABLE. DEROGATORY. and welp the entire bridge ...... .... ........... what can i say. And the parallels to miss all too well??? WHAT WAS THE REASON???? your SISTER splashed out on the bottle- left my scarf there at your SISTER’s house 😐 she’ll patch up your tapestry that i SHRED- maybe this thing was a masterpiece till you TORE it all up 😐 your MOM’s ring in your pocket- your MOTHER’s telling stories bout you on the tee ball team 😐 November flush and your FLANNEL cure- PLAID shirt days and nights when you made me your own 😐 wHAT A SHAME SHE IS FUCKED IN THE HEAD IS2G........... and also why would she not rhyme POCKET with LOCKET?????? why with wallet???????????? slant rhyme why????????????? AND THE NOTE THIS MF SONG ENDS ON..... FUCKED IN THE HEAD

THATS IT. i really sat here and did this for the past 2 hours huh...... hhdjsms anyways LONG STORY SHORT: I HATE ONE INSANE WOMAN AND HER NAME IS TAYLOR ALISON SWIFT. GODSPEEED 🏃‍♀️

#obviously i have not listened to the two delux songs yet so yeah <3 #im sorry about this i have neither proofread this nor do i think this makes any sense </3 #also i just realized i swore alot in this.... its that kind of a year huh ;D #anyways tysm anon for your eagerness for MY rant on evermore <3 truly honored #have a great day ilyy #answered 🗣#evermore era

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mmmhowaboutno · 4 years

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ive barely talked about this to anyone, i thought i got over it but you dont just get over stuff like this. i just wanna write it somewhere. a few days ago was august 3rd. three years ago on that day i was drugged and sexually assaulted in my own home by someone who i thought was my friend. i was friends with him for five years prior, so it came as a shock to me when this happened, not just because of what happened but because i realized trusting people is something i may do too easily.

my parents went away for the weekend with my brother, and my “friend” was in town, so i thought i would invite him over so we could drink and play video games. we had been planning to hang out for a while and i thought it was just a chill thing to do with someone youve been friends with for so long. i still think that. i had two shots of vodka and after that started to feel more drunk than normal. i remember him constantly stuffing his water bottle in my face telling me to drink. at first he casually asked if i just wanted some water, so i didnt think anything of it. when things started getting fuzzy he would say “drink this, its just water, youre so drunk youll feel better.” he never drank from it though. guess where the drugs were.

i remember bits and pieces of what happened and the stuff he did to me. i remember “across the universe” was playing in the background as i drifted in and out of consciousness. i wanted to watch that movie since high school and always put it off, but now ill never be able to watch it. i remember that while i was on the floor and couldnt move or speak he would make me drink water and tell me that i would feel better soon, all while he was rubbing my thighs or reaching up my shorts. i remember being unconscious for a long time, and when i woke up, he was in the bathroom. i could barely hold up my phone, but i called my boyfriend first. it was 4am for him and his phone was on silent, but he said that he woke up right as i was calling for some reason, like he felt something bad was happening. i couldnt talk. its like i was in one of those dreams where you try to run away but cant, except i couldnt get words out of my mouth at all. all i managed to say was “drugged me.” my boyfriend told me to call the police, so i did.

when he came out of the bathroom, he acted like everything was normal. i can still see and hear him standing over me and asking “you okay?” while i was drooling on the floor and couldnt lift my head from the drugs that he gave me. i cant remember what happened until the police came. i only remember the knocking at the door and them telling me to open it. the knocking was so fucking loud. he kept looking at me and asking why i called the police, to which i couldnt answer anything. he started panicking and went in and out of the rooms upstairs in my house. he didnt answer the door, and they kept knocking. i somehow managed to get up, tripped and crawled down half of the stairs, and opened the door for them. i remember my dog barking and an officer placing me on a stretcher and so many questions being tossed around. they asked me how old i was and had me call my boyfriend so they could talk to him. they asked my “friend” if he knew that i had a boyfriend, like that would make a difference in him wanting to drug me or being responsible for it.

he told the officers that i had had a lot to drink before he got to my house, that i was already drunk off my ass before he got there. they let him go. i told them where the drugs were. i pointed at the water bottle that was in his hand and i told them that the drugs were there, in whatever broken words i could get out, and they let him leave. they didnt test the water bottle for anything or look around my house or ask me if i was okay. they didnt ask what he did to me or even ask if he did anything, they just let him leave and took me to the hospital. they didnt even question the fact that he was buying a minor alcohol, they just let him fucking leave.

when i was at the hospital, they tested me for my alcohol levels, which they said were normal. so there was physical evidence that i was not, in fact, drunk, like he said. when i started to come to after waiting at the hospital for hours, i told the doctors where the drugs were. i told them to test the water bottle, i begged and pleaded for them to get in touch with police and tell them that i didnt have any alcohol in my system, that it was drugs that he had given me. there was fucking proof, but they didnt do anything.

they asked me if i wanted to call my mom, and i almost did, but then i remembered that it was her birthday. so, i spent those three hours alone in the room thinking about all the reasons i was a fuck up and how this was all my fault. no one seemed to believe me, so maybe i did make it all up and i was actually drunk. but no, there wasnt any alcohol in my system. i only had two shots. after a while, the doctors told me i could go home. i was confused because i didnt have a way to get home, so they told me get an uber or something. they didnt really care at this point. i called an uber, and went outside to meet the car. once my feet hit the ground outside i realized that i didnt have any shoes on. i dont know why but i thought it was strange. i kinda hyper-focused on that as i waited for the uber. everything around me was so loud. all of a sudden, a young-ish nurse came outside and stood next to me. he said he would wait with me. i saw him pass my room a couple times while i cried silently for those few hours i was in the hospital. he stood outside with me and walked me to my uber, asked the uber driver for his name and number, and told me i would be okay. i remember what he looked like and ill genuinely never forget him. he made me feel safe just by doing that little thing, i knew i could trust him when i didnt even trust myself in that moment.

the car ride home felt like it took forever. i was scared of the uber driver and the road and the fact that it was dark outside and most of all of what my mom would think and say when i finally told her what happened. i got home and walked up to my house to see that the main lights were on. my dog was waiting for me on the stairs and ran up to me as i walked inside. he kept licking me and didnt leave my side, but after a while of my dog being attentive and moving around, i realized how quiet it was inside my house. his car wasnt outside anymore, so i knew he had left, but this sudden wave of inexplicable fear washed over me. i started very anxiously searching every room, looking behind doors and in cabinets for some stupid fucking reason. i looked under every bed and turned on every light in my house. i dont know why but i thought he would still be there, waiting for me. i was looking for any trace of him still being in the house and waiting to do it to me all over again. i went upstairs and looked in my brothers closet only to find the vodka that my “friend” had brought for us to drink hidden in a corner. in the room next to mine was the bag with the receipt for the vodka that he bought. in the room where it all happened was the pizza we had gotten to eat and the cushions that he put under my head when i kept flopping over and drooling. that room was like a war zone to me. i couldnt look at it or be in it, i couldnt for almost a year. there were remnants of what happened all over my house and i felt like i couldnt escape it. it happened in the place where i was supposed to feel the most safe, and now i felt trapped in it.

i went into my room and got into bed with my dog. it was 4am, i couldnt sleep, and i didnt know what to do. every noise made me jump. every noise outside made me peek through the blinds to make sure that it wasnt his car pulling back up to my house. i found myself more awake than exhausted, as i should have been. im sure he slept fine that night. im sure he was okay and that he went home knowing that i was in the hospital and my mind was going 1000 miles an hour trying to remember every little detail of what happened so i could convince the cops that he had drugged me. because evidence wasnt enough. words werent enough for them to even try to dig into the fact that maybe i was possibly telling the truth. the cops didnt care, the doctors didnt care. they let him go.

i dont know why i decided to write about this now, because for the most part, im “over it.” i do still think about what happened occasionally. it keeps me up at night sometimes, but not as much as in the first year after it happened. what i think about the most is the fact that no one believed me. i wasnt drugged and sexually assaulted and then reported it a few days later. the cops came and picked me up in the house where it all happened. they stood next to the person that did it. they looked him in the eye and they looked at the water bottle with drugs in it and at me barely conscious and unable to speak. they let him go. so unfortunately it doesnt surprise me when no one fucking cares if someone remembers and speaks out about their trauma years later because thats the moment they feel comfortable enough to finally talk about it. if cops didnt care in the very moment it was happening to me, it doesnt surprise me that they dont care at all. ever.

he never tried to text or reach out to me again. why would he? i blocked him the next day anyway and i havent heard anything since. ive been silently dealing with it by myself for years. i went to a therapist about it. she told me that it was my fault for inviting him over in the first place. thats what my parents told me too.

and the thing is, im not even the “worst” of it at all. this happens all the fucking time. theres very substantial evidence and cops and doctors will stare at it and think about how much work itll be going through the motions to do their fucking jobs and protect the people being assaulted. its too much work for them, but not for the person having trouble falling asleep every night for years because all they can think about is the moment they were unable to protect themselves and were taken advantage of. i always compare what happened to me to what happened to other people. i think less of it because so much worse has happened to other people. i wasnt raped, people are every day but i wasnt. it could have been worse, and ive always pushed the whole thing out of my mind because of that, but i dont think i should. i dont think it wasnt a big deal, and i dont think it will ever be not a big deal. i think that this shit happened to me and happens to people every day and no one fucking cares because its too much work for them to care. this isnt a metoo post, i just needed to put it into writing somewhere because im tired of keeping it inside. i dont want pity, i never have, i think a lot of people think that when something like this happens and someone speaks out about it that thats what they want. i just wanna say it. sometimes its just fucking good to say it. so for the people who do think that i want pity or that dont believe me or that support cops or that dont think this was a big deal: fuck you and have a horrible day.

thats it sorry

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eye-raq · 5 years

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Who named you?!!!

Erik Stevens x Beulah May Jenkins 😊

Warnings: HUMOR, and I guess fluff.

Summary: (imagine Erik finding out his girl got an old ass name) Erik and his girl get ready to go out to a house warming of her families, but before they go Erik stumbles upon some “new” information.

I hope y’all like this little one shot that me and my friends in the group chat cooked up 😂😂😂 we some goofy bitches. Not really tagging alot of people because this is meant for a little fun to read I guess lol. I hope its good.

“What the fuck? LAH LAH!!”

Lah Lah was in the middle of laying her baby hairs, putting her faux locs up in a bun, wearing high waisted ligh wash jeans, a crop top in red and a pair of black heels.

“Erik clearly I’m fucking busy babe!”

“Nah this some serious shit here! Don’t make me have to tell yo ass twice.”

She groans loudly, stomping out of the bathroom and down the hall to their master bed room. When she enters, she stumbles backward, her ankle sort of twisting awkwardly now shooting pain up her calve from her heels.

The color drained from her face, she was haunted.

“Who the hell is Beulah May Jenkins?!” Erik was shirtless, only in his Jean joggers and Nike vapor max plus.

She had a pained look on her face as she sped over, snatching up the ID, holding it behind her back.

“None of your got damn business! OOOO!! Damn why you going through my shit?!” She was throwing a minnie tempo tantrum. Erik noticed how jumpy she was, eyes looking anywhere but at him. He had a peering look in his eyes, tongue running over his upper teeth.

“Number one, your shit was near my shit. I found this fucking thing under my side of the bed. Number two-“

“Number TWO sit your big ass DOWN, and shut the fuck UP.” She pressed with irritation, counting off on her fingers dramatically trying to divert his attention away from where he was headed.

“So kindly get dressed so we can be outta here.” She wanted it to be over but surely she knew that Erik wouldn’t let this go. He clapped his hands together so loud it echoed off the walls.

“AYEEE! Let’s turn this shit back around Lah Lah Loopsy!!” He sounded out, holding up two fingers.

“Number two, why the fuck you got Big Mama name on here instead of Lah Lah?!” He gave her a quizzical look.

Lah Lah’s eyes almost left her sockets.

“What the fuck you in Lah Lah land or some shit?!” He glowered, scuffing afterwards.

“It’s-it’s not-I.” She could rip her hair out. She could not believe this was happening right now.

Before she could even think, Erik snatched up the ID again.

“ERIK STOP!!” She could cry hard.

She felt her heart race, her leg jiggled with anxiety. This was a huge secret for her.

Erik scanned the ID with his large muscular back facing her, silence between them. The only sound that could be heard was him tapping the card with his fingers. Lah Lah just stood there hugging herself, eyes burning a hole into his back. After what felt like a minute, she watches as Erik shakes his head, taking in a long obnoxious deep breath, before turning back around, scratching his brow.

“Lah Lah...From What I have gathered, it appears this is, YOUR drivers license and not some practical joke from Spencer’s gift shop.” He spoke with fake professionalism. He gazed, one eyebrow flicked upwards into his dreads.

Lah Lah ass couldn’t even speak.

“The name on this drivers license reads, Beulah May-“ he clears his throat, a fist to his mouth.

“Sorry, I had a tickle in my throat, but the name here reads Beulah May Jenkins.” He pointed to each name, from first to last, confusion written on his face, his own words scrambled.

“So in my head I’m like nah uh uh fuck that shit this can’t be her with this geriatric ass name, but then I look below it and see 10/15/1989.” He laughs as if he couldn’t believe his eyes.

“This is DEFINITELY a real ID and everything too.”

She looked as if she were going to faint. He fixed her with a hard gaze.

“It appears that my girl going to late night bingo with Dolores and Betty.” He stared briefly as if curious and evasive.

Lah Lah let out a long agonizing breath, shaking her head before placing her hands on her hips.

“So basically you wanna play?! Either way you know it’s mines nigga!!!” She could crap her pants right now from the embarrassment.

Erik folds his arms over his bare chest.

“Who did this shit to you? Who named you?!” He tried to convey a sincere tone but Lah Lah... Beulah knew that Erik was working his way up to clowning her more.

“Who was it?! Miss Karen or Mr Rod?” Erik licked at his bottom lip with a smirk slowly rising.

“Ole soul food ass name. You gonna tell me who it was?! Or stay mute?! I’m already flabbergasted.” He was struggling not to unravel with laughter.

“It was my DAD ERIK.” She was hopeless at this point. Trust Beulah always wondered why the fuck her father would do that shit!

“NAH NOT TRIPPLE OG ROD.” Erik shook his head frantically, LITERALLY DISTRAUGHT.

“Yes bitch ass nigga it was my damn daddy! Idk maybe he was drunk or some shit why don’t you ask him yourself.”

“Mannnnnnn” He slid his hand down his face.

“What was your mama doing though? She ain’t have a say?” His voice sort of broke from the laughter that wanted to burst.

“She said my Dad wanted to remember his great grandson through me so..”

“Great Grandson?” Erik scrunches his face, shaking his head slightly while his dreads shifted a little on his forehead.

“You know what the fuck I meant. Grandmom fool.”

“Damn...you remember the Civil Rights Movement?” He sat down then, hand under his chin, his leg crossed animatedly.

She was shamefaced. Beulah wanted to press rewind to stop this shit from happening.

“How about I sing this for you maybe your old ass will remember 🎶 we shall over come/ we shall overcome 🎶 “ you remember that? He had this vacant expression as if to play stupid.

“Erik I sware to fucking God I’m gonna fuck you up.”

“You sure you can do that? That osteoporosis ain’t killing you baby?” He spoke that with a fake elderly voice.

She could literally feel the steam blow from her ears. She just wanted to drink, check out her older cousins new place, stuff her face, and dance. Now things were taking a turn for the worse.

“You know what else makes this shit funny?!” That wide dimpled smile was unstoppable.

“Humor me.”

“You really call yourself Lah Lah in short for Beulah.”

This man was in shambles. He couldn’t hardly breath, the entire situation hard to get over.

“All them times your fingers locked up from stroking this dick, damn baby! You got arthritis, osteoporosis, next thing you know you’ll have kyphosis from me blowing your back out.”

“What the FUCK is Kyphrosis?”

“A hump back.” Erik goofy ass wheezed.

“I ain’t the one using a fake name ERIK STEVENS.” Beulah wasn’t really good with come backs.

“Oh nah uh uh don’t put me in that category I’m not the one with a name that belong to a women who was 30 during the prohibition.”

Lah Lah began to retort but her cellphone rang.

“Hello?! Oh...sorry mama. Yeah me and Erik are on our way now.” Lah Lah snapped her fingers at Erik to get dressed, watching him lift from the bed with his eyes dancing with humor, picking up his plain white t shirt and north face windbreaker in red and black. Lah Lah hung up the phone quick, turning to Erik with a scolding look.

“Now I hope you got all your laughs in nigga. Please don’t keep this shit up at the party E.”

Erik shrugged.

“Not making any promises, depends on how my mind feels.” She rolled her eyes, grabbing her things before heading out with Erik.

————————————————————————

“Hey! Lah and Erik are here!”

Erik greets her family, his mind taking in the fact that even her own family called her Lah. Erik felt reassured and happy that everyone were thinking the same thing. While here at the party, it became so unbearable to keep quiet once he saw her father talking it up in the kitchen with a glass of gin.

“Erik! What’s happening young blood?” He shook Erik’s hand, while he said hi to the others.

“Nothing much Mr. Rod, just hanging in there.”

Lah Lah enters, giving her love to everyone before grabbing up a punch bowl, leading her cousin towards the dining room.

“She still got you calling her Lah Lah Erik?” The way her drunk uncle asked that could have had him spitting out his drink in laughter.

“I’m still trying to understand why your old tired ass named your daughter Beulah.” One of her Father’s friends shook his head.

“For as long as I know, I would NEVER ever ever ever get with a girl named Beulah, sound like a name you would give a senior citizen.”

Erik couldn’t take it. He snorted a laughter into his cup, juice bubbles forming.

“Man I remember when I held her in my arms, she was so beautiful, still is. I asked this bastard what her name was.” He friend looked up at Erik, giving him complete eye contact.

“Well, you could probably guess what it was right?”

This caused some of the other men to chime in with chuckles.

“Beulah May Jenkins.” Erik actually took his time to sound that out in a sweet old lady voice, causing an uproar from the men, including her Dad.

“Back then man I was down about my great grandmom so I gave her that name.”

“When was your Great Grandmom born?” Erik asked.

“1901.”

“And when was Lah Lah born?”

“1989.”

“So why in the HELL...you know what.” Her Dads friend waved him away.

———————————————————————-

“Here, I got you a drink.”

Lah Lah reaches out to grab the cup only to find prune juice inside.

“Erik...What the FUCK is this?!”

“Prune Juice, itll help with your chronic constipation.”

Lah Lah just about had it. She kept from Erik because of this and now he wouldn’t stop. She needed to change her name quick and fast.

“Nigga I sware on my life-“

“Don’t say shit like that Beulah baby! You only 80.”

She tossed the cup in the trash angrily.

The one thing he did that had her ready to leave caused some people to laugh.

Erik made her a plate, bringing it outside to one of the picnic tables. She reached out for it but instead Erik sat it down with his, taking a knife and fork to cut it up.

“Since you so damn cripple I gotta chop this meat up for you.” He hummed to himself, cutting her grilled chicken and steak so fine it looked like already chewed food.

“Keep it up, and I’m chopping the meat between your legs with a butcher knife.”

This man even tried to spoon feed her. She didn’t even bother eating, instead grabbing her things, saying her last goodbyes, and leaving.

Home Lah Lah didn’t speak to Erik and she practically ignored him like he wasn’t there. Eventually sleep overtook him and he was a snoring mess. She had enough of his snoring in her ear, taking her foot and kicking him off the bed rough. He landed in a loud thump that caused her to chuckle to herself.

After about a day of no torture from Erik, Lah Lah-Beulah

Started believing Erik was done with his antics. She had plans to get her name permanently changed to Lah Lah or some other shit. Erik could be heard coming home, Lah Lah in the kitchen cooking chili.

“Hey Lah! I got a gift for you c’mere.”

She put the chili on simmer, finally walking into the living room to greet her man.

“Hey how was work?”

“It was good as always.” Erik pulls out a gift bag for her, a handsome smile on his face.

“Here you go baby.”

Lah Lah was beyond happy, she always loved gifts from him. She made herself comfortable on the couch, removing the gift wrap before staring down at a folded piece of fabric with an ugly floral design.

“Erik…”

She pulled out the fabric, letting it fall open to reveal a dress that looked like it belonged in the 1940s to some old as cat lady. It was dingy as well, and it smelled like cat piss.

“I figured you would love it. It suits you fine Beulah.”

She truly believed that this man was through.

“STILL ON THAT SAME SHIT HUH?!”

Erik pointed to the bag.

“One more gift left, and you better open it Miss Jenkins.”

Lah Lah angrily pulls a small box out the bag that had a gold ribbon. A sudden hope for something perfect came to her but that all came crashing down like a thunderstorm. She was staring down at a life alert necklace.

Lah Lah had this blank expression on her face, eyes never leaving that box. Erik could not control his laughter once she pulled the top off, he was on the floor now clutching his stomach.

“You May need to wear that when we fucking cuz I don’t need your ass to have a heart attack.”

Lah Lah through the box at him, groaning.

“ITS OVER E! The jokes over it’s dead now.”

“Not when you kick me off the bed it isn’t. You try that shit again and I’m calling you Beulah from here on out and I don’t give a fuck who hear!”

She side eyed him before lifting from the couch. She was about done with him dragging this shit out.

“If my name is such a damn problem then bounce nigga!” Erik rolled his eyes, lifting from the floor to follow her.

“You can’t take a joke?! I’m only messing with yo uptight ass.”

“You hate my name admit it!” She was being a cry baby now, folding her arms and pouting.

Erik walks up to her, rubbing her arms soothingly.

“Baby no, Beulah is a beautiful name.” She met his eyes, disbelief in them.

“Okay okay its a little cringe.”

She glared.

“A smidge more cringe..” she shoved him.

“BUT I love you. And I will always love you. It was a good laugh and I’m sorry if I offended you aight?”

He pinked her cheek, causing her too look away.

“Aye, cut that shit out Lah.” Erik pulls out another box, Lah Lah staring at it with caution.

“What’s this? A pace maker?!” She didn’t trust it.

“I promise I’m done.”

Lah Lah grabbed the box, taking off the lid to find pink diamond earrings. She shakes her head, a small smile creeping up before giggling to herself.

“Wow...they are actually beautiful asshole.”

She looked up at him and his goofy grin, the laughter uncontrollable now.

“Now cut that shit out and give daddy a kiss.”

She leans up on her tip toes, kissing him softly.

“You still don’t want the life alert though? You may need it in a minute miss Beulah.”

She couldn’t even argue with him, motioning for him to get the box with the life alert so she could wear it.

Erik was amused by this, watching her put it around her neck.

“I want my back blown out, and DONT give me a hump back.”

They both laughed in unison.

@panthergoddessbast @whoramilaje @allhailnjadaka @hearteyes-for-killmonger @vikkidc @ange-sensuel @thehomierobbstark @blackpantherismyish @eriknutinthispoosy @trevantesbrat

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sasuhinasno1fan · 5 years

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Interesting flight

And here it is, the end of Klance AU Month. I actually did it, I did a story for every day, well except day 10 but I've done a whole series on YouTuber, I think I was allowed to skip an AU I knew I wasn't good at. A big thanks to @monthlyklance for moding this event of sorts and being very nice as I sent them link after link of my fics because tumblr wouldn't show my stories in the tag search. Don't know if I'll do this again, maybe when I know time won't be taken up by classes. Wasn't my best fic I think but it's been a long day. Free Day (Single Parent AU)

“Are we going to see granny?” Sylvio asked, watching his uncle feed his little sister.

“Yeah, are you excited?” Lance asked, pulling the empty bottle away from Nadia’s mouth and then handing it to the young boy.

“Yeah, I can’t wait to spend my birthday with them. Uncle Lance?”

“Hmm, what’s wrong?”

“Can we go see mommy and papi?”

Lance’s smile faded a little. Sylvio’s parents, his own older brother and sister-in-law, died in a car crash. Lance had been babysitting his niece and nephew, being the only family member living in L.A like Marco, while everyone was in Florida. He’d just put the kids to sleep, wondering where his brother even was when he got a call. Everything had changed in that night. Being the only one of age that was in the area, Lance had gone from an uncle who was going to start working at the local kindergarten to being a stand in parent. It was hard, having to readjust, having to explain to his nephew that his parents weren’t coming back, to try and calm his niece who’d cry for her parents’ way of calming her. Sylvio had finally understood that his uncle was going to take care of him and his sister from then on, he seemed to grow up. He was only 4, Lance hated that he felt like he should be the one help take care of Nadia when all he should be concerned with was living as a 4 year old. Lance had sent the ashes of Marco and his wife Lisa to Florida to live with his parents after he’d find Sylvio staring at the urn for hours.

“Sure buddy. You need to tell them about all you’ve been up to.”

“We’re about to start boarding for Flight 239 from Los Angles to Florida. Please look at your ticket for your boarding group number. We’d like to invite our first class flyers and membership flyers to start boarding.”

“Grab our tickets buddy.” Lance instructed as he fitted Nadia into the front carrier, feeling her little breaths against his chest. “What number we got?”

“1!” Sylvio called, showing off the tickets to his uncle.

“That’s right. You hold on tight to that ok? I’ll hold our bag alright?”

“We now invite group 1 to board.”

“That’s us! Let’s go Uncle Lance.” Sylvio said, jumping from his seat and running to the line. Lance smiled apologetically to the people who’d been cut off by Sylvio. The flight attendants smiled down at Sylvio as they took the tickets and scanned them before pointing then in the right direction.

“Whoa, buddy, not so fast.” Lance said as Sylvio ran down the corridor to the plane.

“Hello little one.” The flight attendant at the entrance said, helping Sylvio onto the plane. “What’s your name?”

“Sylvio. That’s my sister Nadia and my Uncle Lance.”

“Is it your first time on a plane?”

“Yeah! I’m going to see my granny.”

“Oh, well when you go see her, you’ll have to show her this.” The flight attendant pulled out a pin of wings and attached it to Sylvio’s shirt.

“Uncle Lance, look!”

“Looking good buddy. Can you ask her where our seat is?”

“Oh, where are we sitting?” Sylvio asked, letting the flight attendant look at the ticket.

“You’re number 12 B which means you’re on the left. Do you know where your left hand is?”

“Yes!” he relied holding up his left hand.

“Let’s go buddy. Thank you.”

Using his left hand, Sylvio counted the chairs they passed slowly, Lance reminding him which numbers came next. They reached their seats and Lance had Sylvio climb into the seat by the window when he realised he had a problem. Nadia was still on his chest and he had to lift the carry on suitcase into the overhead bin. He could take her off and lay her down in the seats, but he could feel her start to squirm and he didn’t trust Sylvio to keep her still.

“Do you need help?” Lance looked to see the person standing behind him. he only had a backpack on, his sweatshirt drowning him.

“Um, if you could? I don’t want to risk hitting her.”

“Of course, back up a bit.” Like the suitcase weighed nothing, he picked it up and slid it into the overhead bin. Once it was set, he gestured for Lance to sit down. He waited for Lance the sit in his seat next to Sylvio before pulling his bag off and sitting next to him.

Their seat was the one right after the last first class seat so in no time, Sylvio climbed off his seat and sat on the floor. Lance didn’t say anything as it would still be some time until he had to sit his nephew down again and focused on making sure Nadia’s baby bag, that also held his laptop and tablet he’d given to Sylvio for the trip was under his seat. He didn’t want to have to shove it in the overhead bin. He saw that their aisle mate was the same, shoving his bookbag under his seat.

“Excuse me,” one of the flight attendants asked, “we have basinets if you want one for your daughter?”

“Niece and thank you.” Lance said, patting Nadia as she started to whine a little.

“You probably have time to feed her before we take off.” Their aisle mate said.

Lance looked over at him. he’d stripped his sweatshirt, not bothering to fix his shirt, which even its mess showed his fit figure. He also noticed how long his hair was. It was past his shoulders and looked really soft. He hoped Nadia didn’t spot it. Lisa had long hair so Nadia was used to long hair being near her when she was being held.

“She already ate. Thankfully she got hungry before we had to board.”

The guy looked down at Sylvio who was looking under the seats. “You having fun down there?”

“Uh huh!”

He let out a small laugh, smiling at Sylvio. Thank god, he seemed to like kids. “Cute kid.”

“It’s in his genes. We McClains are adorable.”

“I’m sure.”

Everyone was seated and Lance had coaxed Sylvio up to his seat for take-off. Their aisle mate offered him gum to help with the pressure build-up, letting Sylvio take an extra one. Nadia had dozed off and Lance hoped she’d stay like that for a while. Sylvio’s eyes were glued to the open window as the plane went down the runway and started to pick up speed.

“We’re going fast!”

“Keep chewing buddy, it’ll help your ears.” Lance said.

Soon the plane tipped up and they took off. Sylvio’s chewing slowed as he watched the world below the plane grow smaller. Lance glanced down as Nadia’s face scrunched up. He gently shushed her, hoping she stayed asleep. As they got higher though, she moved around more and woke up crying. Lance groaned in his head. Crying baby and they weren’t allowed to move around yet, just his luck.

Sylvio, thank god, turned away from the window and started asking his sister what was wrong. Usually it would calm her down slightly but Lance guessed the pressure was hurting her too much for her to pay attention to her brother.

“Is it the pressure bothering her?” His aisle mate asked.

“Yeah, I’m really sorry.”

“It’s fine, really. I know people get annoyed by it but babies can’t really control these things.”

Lance was extremely grateful of the understanding man. Finally the seatbelt sign turned off and Lance blocked out what the head flight attendant was saying as he undid his seatbelt and was let out by the still slightly ruffled man. “Sylvio, stay here ok?”

“Ok.”

Lance tried to ignore the looks he got as Nadia continued to cry. He hadn’t gotten the chance to grab her pacifier though he doubted she’d keep it in her mouth. He gently shushed her, bouncing as he tried to calm her down. Thankfully her cries lessened but she still whined loudly.

“Shh, shh, you’re ok.” He whispered when he saw the same man coming towards him. he moved away from the bathroom thinking he was heading there.

“Your, um, nephew, asked me check on you?”

“Sylvio yeah. He knows he can’t do it himself. You don’t have to.”

“I don’t mind. What’s her name?”

“Nadia.”

“Nadia.” He called, standing next to Lance. “Nadia.”

Hearing a new voice, Nadia tired looking for it, her whining quieting some.

“Do you want to try holding her?”

“If it’s ok.”

“Sure. Help me?” he asked, pointing to the buckle on his back.

It was unclipped and Lance slipped the handles off, keeping Nadia close to him. he let the other man take her, easily taking her into his arms.

“You’re pretty good.”

“My brother has a kid, I volunteered at their day-care.”

Nadia’s whining stopped as she stared up at the new face. She blinked and reached out her hand.

“Wait, Nadia, no!” Lance said as she gripped his hair, holding it firm in her grip. Her gaze was completely fixed on the long black strands in her fist. “I am so sorry. She has a thing with hair, she doesn’t let – no don’t put it in your mouth! Oh god, Nadia.”

“It’s ok. I mean there are worse ways to spend a flight. I never did introduce myself, I’m Keith.” He said, his hand pulling Nadia’s fist away from her mouth.

“Lance, hi. Um, she’s not going to let go.”

“It’s ok, I don’t mind holding her. Besides, you still have your nephew to worry about.”

“Um, right. Thanks.” Lance pulled off the carrier entirely and lead them back to there seats where Sylvio stared at his sister in Keith’s arms.

“She liked his hair?”

“You know your sister. Do you want your tablet?”

“Yes please.”

“How old is he?” Keith asked letting Nadia stand on his lap so he wouldn’t risk her pulling out his hair.

“4.”

“He talks a lot for a 4 year old.”

“Another gene of McClains, we don’t have an off switch.” Lance said, opening the armrest to pull out the try for Sylvio, letting him navigate the tablet on his own. “So you volunteer at your um?”

“Nephew. I picked him up one day and was asked to stick around to help with something and the next thing I knew, I kept going back. I work in security so kids except my nephew I never thought were my forte. Turns out I’m not bad with them.”

“I can tell. I work at a kindergarten and I don’t think I’ve managed to calm a fussy kid down the quickly.”

“I guess you’d be good with kids. You got Sylvio very worried about you.”

Lance gained a pain smile on his face, “it for a different reason. Their parents died a while back. I went from babysitting uncle to new dad in a night.” Looking over at Sylvio who focused on the tablet. “Sylvio had to understand that so young. When I dropped him off to school on the first day back, he wouldn’t stop crying for hours and of course seeing her brother cry made Nadia sad.”

“That must have been a lot.”

Lance nodded. “It was. Parenting is terrifying enough. It’s hard but a smile from either of these two makes it feel worth it.”

“I know they must apr-Ow!” Keith was cut off when Nadia pulled on his hair.

“No Nadia.” Lance said, pulling her fist open, even though she whined. Keith sat her on his lap and gave her his hand to play with. “Again, really sorry.” He said, pushing Keith’s hair off his shoulders.

“Here’s that bassinet.” The flight attendant came and attached the carrier onto the wall in front of them, pressing down on it to make sure it was stable. “Let’s give your boyfriend’s lap a break.

“Oh, uh, he’s not my boyfriend.” Lance corrected, feeling his cheeks getting hot.

“What’s a boyfriend?” Sylvio asked, Lance frowning at him.

“Now you pull your attention from the tablet. Don’t worry about that silly.”

“Sorry, it’s just she seems so comfortable on his lap and he seemed so nice to you as you were boarding. My apologies. We’ll start the drink service soon.”

“Thank you.” Once the flight attendant left, Lance turned to Keith. “I honestly feel like all I’m doing is apologizing.”

Keith lifted Nadia off his lap and placed her in the basinet, watching her look around. “It’s ok. I can certainly say this is one of the most interesting flights I’ve been on.”

#klance au month #lance adopted sylvio and nadia

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antihero-writings · 5 years

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The Things We Say Aloud—Pandora Hearts Fic for Phmonth18 Rainsworth Trio Week—Prompt 2: Family (Full Fic)

Fic Title: The Things We Say Aloud

Fic Synopsis: The Rainsworth Trio has a tradition of midnight snowball fights. But what if this is Break’s last?

Notes: This is another fic I wrote last Christmas (for the prompt “Rain”), but I think will work well for Phmonth18. I think it works best for the Rainsworth Trio Prompt 2: Family. You don’t have to have read the previous Christmas fic to understand it, but they are supposed to take place in the same year, and there are a few connections/references between them. (The other one is called “In Plain Sight” and you can read it on this blog, and/or at I_prefer_the_term_antihero ‘s Ao3!)

Out of all the PH fics I’ve written so far, this is honestly probably my favorite. I would deeply appreciate it if you commented to let me know you enjoyed it!

I feel like the Rainsworth Trio–especially Sharon and Break–don’t really talk about Break’s death, even though they know it’s coming. I thought it would be interesting to explore how such a conversation would go, and almost made myself cry writing it!

Also, point of interest, a song that I think works really well for the section of this fic where Break is pondering if it will be his last Christmas is “Into the Open Air” from the Brave soundtrack.

P.S. This is a repost of an old fic!

Fic:

Rain pounded its tune on the roof. It was the kind of rain that swarms the air, making it misty, grey, and cold with the buzzing of a thousand tiny drops.

It wasn’t that he disliked the rain. There will always be something about the rain that’s soothing to people dealing with sorrow. But rain like this; that pounds, and pounds, and doesn’t dissipate, sometimes serves to extend the mistiness inside too. Though it could be a rest, a relief, people like him always pray for the sun to come back. For sunny days and summer light were something people like him, with red eyes, and a past full of sin, knew they didn’t deserve, but couldn’t help seeking all the same.

Xerxes Break walked through the hallway of the Rainsworth manor. He wore his turquoise and gold outfit, half of his white hair falling across his shoulder, the other, shorter side, messily added to the covering the bandages provided—bandages over the place where his left eye should have been, though it rarely bled anymore.

As he passed by one of the rooms, he saw Sharon. She looked so small, but so regal, sitting on the windowsill, with her back to the glass, now frosted with condensation. Her chestnut hair was pulled back with a ribbon, and she was wearing her little pink dress. The little girl was pouting, staring at the ground, her arms folded over her chest in the characteristic expression children wear when they don’t get their way.

He paused, resting his hand on the doorframe.

She lifted her head.

When she met his eyes, he remembered very quickly that was not in his skill set to comfort little girls.

When he glanced back, she was giving him a look that said Well? Aren’t you going to come comfort me?

He knew better than to disobey such a look. He took a deep breath and walked in, hopping up on the windowsill next to her.

Like the rain, it wasn’t that he disliked kids, he just didn’t know how to deal with them. When they cried and threw tantrums…in short, he didn’t know how to deal with emotion (well, strong ones anyways). He couldn’t help hoping that kids like her could stay happy, and innocent forever. Like he had hoped for his young mistress from another time, and seen it go so very wrong, then later heard, through his own interference, that he had made it go far worse. But children would have to get hurt, they would have to grow up, some day. And in turn, they would become the kinds of creatures who hurt, and caused pain, who even killed, and made excuses for it…creatures like himself.

Luckily, he found that Sharon was a much happier, much kinder, much stronger child than most.

When she didn’t speak—(he didn’t dare ask, for fear of making it worse)—he turned to look outside the window.

“Xerx-niisan,” she began at last, “Why is the sky crying?”

He turned back to her, raising an eyebrow. “Huh?”

They weren’t siblings; they weren’t even remotely related. But for some reason, the name fixed itself in her mouth, and nothing he did or said could change that.

She could be a little tyrant sometimes.

At his misunderstanding, she continued to pout, averting her eyes. Then she jerked back to look at him, (he flinched a little), and said in a high pitched voice, “It’s almost Christmas! Why is it raining? It should be snowing!”

“Oh,” he relaxed a little, contemplating his response, “Well…it’s not going to stop raining just because you want it to. Sometimes,” he gave a sardonic smile that was more painful than the frown that seemed fixed on his face, looking away into the rain, as if he would find answers reading the drops, “things…people…that should be happy, just can’t be. And no matter how much you want something…”

He trailed off, and when he turned back, he saw tears welling in her eyes.

Nice going, Xerxes, you barely have to open your mouth to make a little girl cry.

There they were, brimming to the surface: all those emotions he didn’t know what to do with. He could only sit there, waiting for her own brand of rain to start, wanting more than anything to escape, to not have to figure out the right words to fix her.

It was the crying he hated the most. Maybe it was because it reminded him too much of a certain day, long ago, of a certain girl…but the snow did fall that day…

Still, he wasn’t going to tell her that if she just wished hard enough, if she believed in hope, the-general-goodness-of-the-world-and-its-inhabitants, and maybe a little bit of magic, that the snow would fall, that she could change things. Wishes were dangerous things, and he didn’t suggest anyone make them. You never know who, or what, might be listening.

Fortunately, before the tears reached her cheeks, Sharon’s mother, Shelly Rainsworth, appeared at the doorway. She looked almost exactly like an older version of her daughter, the same chestnut hair, the same smile that shined with a light of its own.

Upon seeing the tearful look on her daughter’s face, she marched into the room, put her hands on her hips, and turned to Break.

“Xerxes,” she said his name like he really was Sharon’s brother, “what did you say to her?”

“Why do you assume it was my fault, Shelly-sama?” he muttered, sounding like the child she was calling out.

“Let’s just say you have a habit of stepping on people’s feelings.”

He sighed. “I was only telling her that it won’t start snowing simply because she wants it to.”

“It’s almost Christmas, mother!” Sharon said like she was pleading her case, the tears reappearing in her eyes.

Shelly smiled, shaking her head.

“What am I going to do with you two?” she crouched down in front of Sharon, and paused, contemplating her own question for a moment. “Tell you what, sweetie; I can’t promise it’ll start snowing because you want it to, but I can promise this:” she pushed her daughter’s tears away, “The moment it starts snowing—or, I suppose,” she interrupted herself, “the moment there’s enough snow on the ground, but no later!—we’ll go outside, and have a snowball fight. How does that sound?”

“Really?” Sharon raised her head, the sadness lifting a little.

“Even if I’m busy, or it starts snowing in the middle of the night,” Shelly elaborated, grinning, “No, especially, if it’s in the middle of the night,” she placed a finger on Sharon’s nose, at which the little girl giggled, “I’ll wake you up—or you me—then, while everyone else is asleep, we’ll run around the house in just our pajamas and coats, we’ll wake Xerxes—”

“What?!” Break blurted out.

“Yes, we’ll wake Xerxes,” she repeated smirking, “drag him outside—”

“Do I get a say in this?!”

“Nope,” she grinned mischievously, “Don’t think I’m letting you get out of this one.”

“Tch.” He looked away.

She walked calmly to the couch, picked up one of the pillows, as if she was going to fluff it, brought it over to them, and smacked him with it.

He growled, his red eye starting to blaze, like some caged beast.

She threw the pillow back onto the couch, sighing, saying seriously, “I don’t want you sitting here on this windowsill forever…I know, somewhere inside you, there’s someone…” she pondered it, then smiled, saying simply, “Someone who’s not afraid. You’re stronger than you think. Deep down, I think, these sorts of things that seem childish, like snowball fights, and tea-parties,” she smirked, “fun things, you actually enjoy.”

He looked away, as if knowing he could only disappoint her.

She added softly, placing a finger on his chin, making him look at her,

“We’ll see that smile someday, Xerxes Break.”

He stared at her as she took her fingers away, then he blinked, averting his eyes again. murmuring something about, “Really, Shelly-sama…I’d just ruin—”

“Sharon,” Shelly interrupted his mutterings, turning to her daughter, “Do you think Xerxes should sit here sulking, day in and day out, or do you think he should join our snowball fight?”

“Xerx-niisan should come with us!” she didn’t even take a breath before she answered.

He stared into the little girl’s eyes, so full of hope, no question, no hesitation, just…kindness, endless kindness.

Shelly smiled at her daughter, which turned into devious smirk when she looked at him.

“Checkmate.”

He bit his lip before jumping back down to the ground, muttering incoherently his displeasure, knowing once they were set, he couldn’t change their minds.

They could be tyrants sometimes.

Most people wouldn’t have gone near him, much less want him to be a part of something…well, fun. He knew what people said about him. It didn’t matter, it had been a long time since he had cared what other people thought, plus, he more than welcomed the lack of company. But, the thing is, he knew they were right; he was creepy, and dark, and very, very dangerous. So, he too, often wondered why they had taken him in, why they treated him like something worth saving, worth dragging out of bed for snowball fights, and tea-parties, rather than being sure, like rest of the world was—like he was—that he would just darken everything with any amount of light in it.

That’s what Children of Misfortune were for, right?

A little girl, who should have been more scared of him than anyone, who should’ve wanted him as far away from her and her snowball fights than anyone, could not only go near him, but fail to hesitate as she bounded up to this dark-and-dangerous man, looked into that blood-red eye, and asked him why the sky was crying, gave him flowers, and called him “brother.”

And that was worth more to him than he would ever dare admit aloud.

*****

It was from nightmares about knights, and blood, little girls, dolls, and names that he never mentioned, that Xerxes Break awoke from.

Breath and heartbeat weighed heavily on his chest. Once the memories faded enough for him to remember that, though it may have been real, it was not now, he gritted his teeth together, slamming his fist into the wall behind him. He didn’t care how much pain was pulsating through his hand.

If only it would take his mind off the throbbing in his empty eye socket.

If he had been a weaker man, perhaps he would have screamed, even cried, perhaps he would have whispered something pitifully to the sheets about not wanting to remember again, not wanting nightmares like this one to show their faces in his head. But he had already made a wish, and these nightmares were its descendants. He didn’t have the authority to dream anymore.

All he had was the anger and regret surging through his body, and nowhere for it to go, except make his past a weapon that shattered him just as much as it did his enemies, into glass shards, and cold bones, and bloodstained roles.

Still, there was some part of him that hoped after so many years they would have stopped haunting him. And sure, maybe it wasn’t every night, but they did come. Perhaps that’s why they call them ghosts; There were too many horrors to be reminded of, too many sins to feel guilty for, too little he could do to fix it, and the nightmares were all too eager for the task. One lifetime was not enough for them to let him forget.

They say ‘there’s no rest for the wicked’, and his mind was often cruel enough to remind him.

When he raised his gaze, he saw that the curtain was open just slightly, and something in the sliver of window flickered.

The Mad Hatter sighed, throwing his legs over the side of the bed.

It was awfully cold.

He stepped up to the window, gently pulling back the curtain, just enough so he could see.

He drew in a breath softly, his eye widening at the view:

It was snowing.

There was enough moonlight to see flakes falling upon the grounds—which were cloaked in white by now.

Like that time years ago, for the whole month, the only thing that fell from the clouds was rain, and finally, the sky decided that Christmas Eve was no time to be laying in bed, sleeping, or else dreaming about past follies.

“Well, Shelly-sama, what do you think?” he spoke softly to the merciful sky, “One last snowball fight?” he paused a moment, turning, leaning against the window, as if waiting for an answer to be whispered in his ear.

He stepped over to his wardrobe, throwing a coat over his pajamas, taking up some winter gloves, putting on socks and boots, and, as always, placing Emily on his shoulder (she wouldn’t want to miss this).

Lighting the candelabra on his nightstand, he ventured into the hallway, making his way toward Sharon’s bedroom.

Opening the door as quietly as he could, he walked in, setting the light on her nightstand.

Sharon was sleeping soundly on her curtained bed, her hair splayed all over the sheets, wrinkled in the night’s sleep, and she hugged her pillow.

He resisted the urge to laugh at her un-proper appearance.

Break sat on the side of her bed, by her head, saying quietly,

“Ojousama.”

She stirred in her sleep, muttering something indecipherable.

He gently ran his hand through her hair, saying louder, “Sharon.”

She blinked open fuchsia eyes to see her servant.

“Break,” she muttered his name softly.

Slowly, she sat up, yawning, looking around.

“Break, what’re you…?” she began, fatigue weighing down her words, then shook it away by shaking her head, “What are you doing in my room?! In the middle of the night! How dare you wake me up!”

He knew what was coming next: she grabbed one of the pillows, and he dodged it before she hit him with it. “Do you think you can just come in here as you please?!”

“Really, Ojousama,” he laughed, standing back up, “You think I’d risk injury without good reason?”

She folded her arms over her chest, pouting. He walked over to the window, throwing open the curtain, standing beside it.

“This better not be one of your pranks, Break,” she muttered, walking over to the window.

“Relax. When have I ever been that cruel?”

She glared at him, as if to say I-could-name-a-few-times, then turned to the window, surveying the landscape outside.

Her aggravated expression broke for widened eyes and a smile.

“Break!” she exclaimed, all grievance forgotten, grabbing his hands and spinning him around, “It’s snowing!!” she let go of him, and jumped up on the bed, repeating, “It’s snowing!! It’s snowing!!”

He smirked, folding his arms over his chest; No matter how old she really was, she still looked like that little kid to him.

“What do you say?” he helped her down from the bed, “One last snowball fight?”

“What are you talking about ‘one last’?” she grabbed the pillow and managed to catch him off guard this time. “You better not be talking about that again!”

She didn’t wait for him to respond as she dropped the pillow and ran over to her wardrobe, found a little coat to throw over her nightshirt, boots, and gloves, then handed him a ribbon to tie her hair back.

“Ready?” he tapped her on the shoulder when he had finished tying her hair.

She nodded, beaming.

They weren’t too far from Reim’s room when Break asked her to hold the candelabra, and stepped down the stairs to the front door.

“Where are you going?” she asked, “Reim’s room is this way.”

“This will only take a moment,” he grinned.

She put her hand on her hip, scowling at him as he ran out the front door. Quickly he returned, with the first snowball in his gloved hand.

“Break! Just what are you intending to do with that?!”

“You’ll see!” said Emily.

Sharon sighed, placing her head in her hand.

Reim stayed at the Rainsworth’s often enough that he had his own room (albeit, not a very fancy one). They quietly entered it to see the servant laying on a bed, much neater than either of theirs, facing away from them. His glasses, and some extra paperwork he just couldn’t leave at work, lay dormant on his nightstand.

Break tiptoed up to his friend, gently pulled back the collar of his shirt, and stuffed a snowball down the back of his shirt.

It was a moment before it took effect, but when it did, Reim skyrocketed out of bed, dancing around, until the snow fell onto the floor.

Break could barely contain his laughter.

He rested his hands on his knees panting. When he regained his bearings enough to figure out what had just happened, and saw Break laughing, he shouted,

“XERXES, YOU BASTARD!!”

Reim lunged at Break, at which the older man only needed to step out of the way, to make Reim trip onto the floor.

“Yes, a tired Reim-san, without his glasses, is definitely a match for me,” he remarked, leaning over him,

“A normal Reim-san isn’t exactly a match either!” Emily squeaked.

“Now, now Emily,” Break chided his doll playfully, “we mustn’t rub this sort of thing in people’s faces.”

“I’m gonna kill you,” Reim’s voice was muffled by the floor

Break laughed, “Is that so?”

“All in good fun!” Emily chirped.

“It’s not fun for me!” he retorted, sitting up, “How can your idea of fun be tormenting your best friend!” Reim got up off the floor and sat on his bed.

“Come now, Reim-san, ‘torment’ is a little harsh, don’t you think?”

“I meant what I said! I mean, who in their right mind thinks a good way to wake their friend up is to stuff freezing-cold snow—”

He interrupted himself, looking at each of them with question in his eyes. He repeated the word, “Snow…?”

Sharon and Break grinned at each other.

Break helped his friend up, saying, “And whoever said I was in my right mind? Didn’t you know? All the best people are mad.”

Reim rolled his eyes.

Sharon and Break stepped up to the window to unveil the answer to his question. Reim followed to inspect the view outside.

Then he looked at each of them, shaking his head and smiling. “Really, you two, after all these years…”

He trailed off, going over to his wardrobe to put on the winter clothes he kept there.

They barely had time to blow out the candles before Sharon grabbed both their hands and dragged them out into the moonlit hall.

They were like little kids trying to get a peek at Santa; bumbling down the hall, almost falling over each other, shushing each other, as they made their way through the manor, down the stairs, out the front door, into the cold grounds.

Even with their winter clothing, the cold still crept in. The snow muffled ordinary sounds, falling seamlessly, sparks of scattered moonlight gleaming off the flakes.

“So, we’ll—” Reim was interrupted by Break throwing a snowball at the back of his head.

“Oy! I was talking!” he whirled around.

“What’s there to talk about, Reim-san?” Break tossed another snowball up and down in his hand.

“I was simply—”

This time it was Sharon who threw the snowball at his face.

“Nice shot, Ojousama,” Break mentioned.

“Thank you,” she grinned, “You’re next, Xerx-niisan.”

“Alright, you two are going down,” Reim challenged.

“That’s more like,” Break smirked.

It didn’t make sense that three adults could have so much fun doing something so childish as playing in the snow. But between exploding snow and shouting, their laughter was what radiated like light from the scene. Maybe they forgot they weren’t children, they forgot that they had grown up things to do, responsibilities to attend to, and that the world was really comprised of blood and pain, and worthless names, not innocence and friendship.

The mad tea party, forever trapped in a moment, forgotten by time.

It was a while later when another voice broke through:

“Hey, what are you guys doing?”

They paused, turning to see Oz at one of the balconies.

“Our humblest apologies, Oz-sama!” Reim shouted back, bowing low, “We didn’t intend to be so loud!”

“No worries!” he yawned, “Are you…having a snowball fight?”

“That’s right, Oz-kun,” Break answered, “Would you like to join us?”

“Really?! You’ll let me?!”

“Sure,” he tossed a snowball up and down in his hand again, “but we certainly won’t be going easy on you!”

Oz beamed. “Hang on a sec! Lemme grab Gil and Alice!”

Not long afterwards, they heard the all-too-familiar sounds of Gilbert and Alice shouting, and they their annoyed faces appeared on the balcony.

“Why are you three having a snowball fight at 6:00 in the morning!” Gilbert yelled down to them.

“Oh? You scared you didn’t make the cut?” Break taunted . “Clown! Is this your doing?!” Alice demanded, “I’ll come down there and make you pay for waking me up!”

As Break spoke to them, Reim saw it as an opportunity to get his own revenge, and snuck up behind him. Break, of course, still heard him coming and, once again, tripped him, as he got close.

Break walked around him in a circle, grinning shaking his head, “You’re going to have to try harder than that to beat me.”

Reim gave an expression akin to Gilbert’s evil eye.

Break kicked some snow onto his head as he walked by, just to rub it his face (quite literally).

Oz, Gilbert, and Alice tumbled down the front steps, already laughing and yelling at each other before they even joined the fight.

“Well look who it is,” Break taunted, leaning over them, then Emily continued,

“The dumb bunny, the spoiled brat, and—” he didn’t get to finish, because the two lunged at him.

There weren’t really any teams, or way of keeping score—it was everyone against everyone else, though each of them had their own approach: Gilbert had a more meticulous method; creating a stash of snowballs, and walls to hide behind, (often getting hit in the building process). Oz was would sneak up on people, and took particular pleasure in knocking down, or stealing, Gil’s hard work, while Alice ran around pelting everyone in sight, holding a particular grudge against anyone who landed a hit on her (who were mostly Break and Oz).

Near the end of their fight, as Break snuck up on Sharon, just about to land a hit on her, he found himself falling, and was then somehow on the other side of the yard,

He paused to regain his bearings, and stood back up to his full height, quickly discerning what had happened.

“Is that really fair, Ojousama?” he called across the yard, knowing she had used her Chain.

She chuckled like it was a trivial offense, “Since when have you cared what’s fair Xerx-niisan?”

Well, she got me there.

It was at this moment he felt a rush of cold! against his neck, and tensed, resisting the urge to spill some choice words. He spun around to see that Reim had been waiting behind a nearby tree and, as he addressed his mistress, Reim had managed to get the perfect revenge.

Break pulled back his shirt to make sure the snow fell, scowling at his friend.

“Say it,” Reim folded his arms over his chest.

“What? That you got me?”

Reim’s expression was unmoving.

“I’ll say nothing of the sort, Reim-san,” he flicked his glasses, “After all, you merely copied me. You should be more creative next time.”

Reim’s fingers curled into fists, practically growling at him.

“I didn’t know we could use Chains!” Oz called, running up to them, having noticed Sharon’s expert use of Eques, (but not the following exchange between Break and Reim.)

“Seaweed-head! Release my limiter!” Alice shouted when she heard, “I want to smash the clowny bastard to smithereens!”

“Is that so?” Break called, “You really want to go down that path, Alice-kun?” Break smirked evilly, “My Mad Hatter would destroy you before Gilbert-kun even had the chance.”

“You wanna go, clown!” Alice hollered, and Gilbert had to hold her back to keep her from rushing at him with teeth and claws.

Reim looked worried, and Oz—wearing a similar expression—spoke in hushed tones, “No, Alice! You don’t want to go up against his Mad Hatter!”

“Try me, Manservant!”

“Break! No one wants to see you killing yourself over some stupid fight with some little girl!” Gilbert scolded.

“Oy! Who you callin’ ‘some little girl’?!” Alice snapped at Gilbert.

That seemed to return Reim to his senses,

“That’s right!” Reim scolded, “What did I tell you about being reckless with your powers?!”

“Always so tense, you two,” he walked up to Alice and ruffled her hair, “I’m only teasing.”

Alice broke free, and the fight resumed, though the others were glad to see neither managed to draw blood, and that it quickly returned to the antics of the snowy game.

And for one brief moment, Break forgot about everything else. About the nightmares, the regrets, and the answers he clung to so desperately as a reason to keep himself from falling further. And for one moment, he could see those flickering lights behind dark eyes, and he was happy he could feel the cold biting his skin, he was happy he could see their faces—rosy-cheeked, all smiles and laughs, even if they were yelling at him—for one precious flicker of a moment, he was happy to be alive.

That moment would end. The shadows would crawl back from the corners of his mind, the smiles would become fake again, the world would become a wax museum of happiness. Reasons that were just that, empty reasons; desire had left them behind in an alleyway long ago, for better, darker wishes. The pain would come back, and once again he’d convince himself, I don’t care, I don’t care, I don’t care about them. About what happens to me. The snow white chaos would return to tears too fast. But in this moment, it was okay. He was okay.

Sharon and Reim ran at him, but instead of getting out of the way, this time he let them bowl him over, the three of them collapsing in the snow.

Shock flitted across their faces, which broke for smiles.

He wanted to say he was sorry. He wanted to tell them over and over I love you both so very much. But he wasn’t the only one who knew that those words falling from Xerxes Break’s lips was all too close to admitting defeat. Because if he admitted he cared, then he wouldn’t be able to let them go when the end came. And he knew it would come all too soon. His lips wouldn’t dare betray him with such miserable words.

So they settled for a smile.

His real smile. Not the smirks and grins he gave away at a moment’s notice. The smile that was barely perceptible, but which, for them, captured within its folds more sunlight than anything else in their world.

Sharon and Reim glanced at each other, then smiled back at him, deciding not to sully the moment with words.

And, as soon as it came, the true smile was replaced with a smirk.

“You two really are gullible,” he put snow in their hair.

They jumped up, shouting his name, trying to rub it out, then quickly ran after him.

He couldn’t tell them the truth. He couldn’t tell them that he was thinking how this might be his last Christmas. He couldn’t tell them how he was wondering if they would still put his stocking on the mantelpiece when he was gone.

He didn’t get a chance to anyways, because it wasn’t long afterwards when beads of citrus and crimson light began tracing the navy sky.

They paused, panting, raising their eyes to look into the sunrise.

For a moment they stared silently at the art the morning made of daybreak, gentle smiles tracing their lips at the beauty.

Then Oz broke in, exclaiming,

“Merry Christmas, everyone!”

“Merry Christmas!” they answered, a little tiredly.

“What do you guys think?” Reim asked, “Ready to go inside?”

“Aww, but we were having so much fun!” Oz protested, trying to mask the fatigue in his voice.

“Easy for you to say, we’re exhausted!”

“To be fair, we were out here much longer than them,” Break panted, realizing just how tired he was. “Perhaps I have gotten old after all. If you youngin’s want to go on—” he flapped a shirt sleeve their direction.

“There he goes again calling himself old!”

Sharon broke in, “Don’t you want to open presents?”

“Presents?!” Oz repeated, like a dog who had seen a squirrel, glancing at Gilbert and Alice, his grin widening.

They began to make their way inside, still laughing and talking about the plays they each had made, and how they would eventually get each other back. As they walked back, instead of joining the conversation, Sharon gently tugged on the corner of Break’s coat, holding him back.

He turned to see that instead of the tired, but joy-full smile that had traced her face moments earlier, she was hanging her head low.

“Ojousama?” he asked worriedly, crouching down beside her, seeing tears begin to grace her cheeks.

The others noticed, and stopped too.

“Xerxes! What did you do?!” Reim demanded.

“Yeah, Break! How dare you make a girl cry on Christmas?!” Oz questioned, running up to her.

He rolled his eyes at them.

“I’m fine, everyone,” Sharon reassured them, giving a somewhat plastered smile, “I’ll just be a moment.”

They all glanced at each other, knowing something was clearly wrong.

“Are you sure?” Gilbert asked.

“Yeah, Sharon-chan, if you need something—”

“Yes. Please, go inside. Break and I will catch up with you.”

They glanced at each other.

“Alright, Sharon-chan. Just let us know if you need anything, okay?” Oz put a hand on her shoulder.

“Thank you, Oz-sama,” she smiled.

The others gave similar smiles back to her, then they gave Break a collective you-better-not-make-this-worse look before walking up the stairs into the manor.

“Sharon?” he asked softly.

No matter how many years went by, he still couldn’t handle the sight of a child in tears.

“Xerx-niisan,” he could tell she was fighting back against the tears, “What if… What if this is your last Christmas?”

He gasped; he didn’t expect her to be thinking about the same thing.

“What if…” she continued, breath taut, “What if we never get to have another snowball fight? What if…?”

“Well,” he rubbed his neck, looking away, “you and Reim can still—”

“Don’t act like everything will be the same when you’re gone!” she threw snow into his face.

He fell back onto his elbows, gently brushing it out of his hair. After a moment a laugh bubbled in his throat, and he put his hand on his face.

“What’s so funny?!” she demanded, scowling.

Obviously that was the wrong thing to do.

If only she had chosen someone else to comfort her; someone like Oz, who could read the situation, and chose his words carefully. Or Gilbert, who was sensitive enough to understand. Even Reim would be better, despite his rather unemotional, straightforward nature. But she had chosen him.

“It’s funny…to tell you the truth,” his voice became more serious, “It’s just…I was thinking about the same thing.”

Shock added to the concoction of hurt and yearning in her eyes.

“Y-You were?”

He looked at the ground and nodded ever so slightly.

“How dare you laugh at that?” she balled a fist in the snow, but the strength seemed to leave her.

She shook her head, tears fluttering back to her eyes, “You can’t…Xerx-niisan, you can’t! I…I don’t want to be alone!” she put her arms around him and fell onto him.

His eye was wide, his breath harsh and cold as he looked at the girl in his arms, forgetting for a less than a moment that she was not that little girl in a darkened room, surrounded by coffins.

He shook his head of the memory.

“You won’t be alone, you’ll have Reim, and Sheryl-sama, and—”

She lifted her head to scowl at him, as if to say must-I-repeat-what-I-said and he cleared his throat, changing his method of attack.

“Well, I won’t go down easy, that’s for sure. But, despite how it might seem,” he gently ran his finger along her cheek, giving that sad but true smile, and whispered, “I am not that strong.”

“You think you can talking about you dying all the time and I’ll just—?!” she tried to fight back, to be angry, but her words fell like the snow, and she murmured again, she let her head fall back onto his shoulder, and whispered back, “Xerx-niisan…”

He gently wrapped his own arms around her.

“I want to be there for you…” she murmured, “I don’t want you to do something stupid…You’re always running into fights without a second thought…” she sobbed for a moment before saying, “Maybe we could…maybe we could stop it? I-I could go into the fights with Eques…Oz-sama and Gilbert-sama—”

He pressed a kiss into her hair, and as she lifted her head off his shoulder to look at him with the wide and teary eyes of her younger self. The look in his eyes was enough to say I’m sorry, Sharon.

“It’s just like I told you, Ojousama,” he ran his fingers through her hair, and murmured into her ear, “No matter how much I may want it to, I can’t stop it from raining.”

She lifted her head off his shoulder to look at him.

“No matter how much we might want it to, we can make the snow fall. Our wishes can’t change things. Even if…” his words were blown by the wind into the stars.

She shook her head gently, murmuring that name.

“Just promise me you won’t make any illegal contracts to bring me back,” he laughed a little, which turned into a grimace, and she knew just how serious he was being.

She smiled for the first time since the conversation started. “I promise.”

For a moment they sat there, together, in a sort of limbo, watching as the sunrise turned into a light blue sky—a present sorrow caught between the earlier joy, wondering which emotion of the two would soon come. Moments were so finicky.

“I can’t promise I’ll have another Christmas, but we still have today. Let’s not waste it with talking about depressing things.”

She nodded, smiling.

He gently reached down and picked her up.

“Xerx-niisan!” she protested at first.

He touched her nose with his finger.

After a moment, as he took her inside, she rested her head against him sleepily, murmuring, “Xerx-niisan, I don’t want…I don’t want you to pretend you’re okay for my sake.”

His eye widened and he jerked his head to look at her.

“Don’t give me that look,” she responded, “I know you do it. You think I can’t handle it.”

He took a deep breath, “I’m fine, Ojousama,” he murmured, and smiled, “It’s Christmas, after all.”

She shook her head, “No you’re not!”

Once again he kissed her head gave her his real smile, “No, really, Sharon. I am. At least for today.”

The smile she returned was real too.

And that was worth far more to them than either of them needed to say aloud.

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