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#i want to stay home but i dont have a choice
amethyst-halo · 7 months
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my excerpt thoughts
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sitting in bed eating cheese absolutely stewing
#so im doing the dishes and heard a knock on the door right. and bc both my parents r downstairs i answer it#and guess fucking what? its the guy i literally switched out of french to avoid because he kept asking me super invasive questions#so im like What the fuck do u want. and he starts this whole pity story about how he was soooo worried when i kept disappearing from school#and how id sometimes come back with bruises and never explained anything to him so he had 'no choice' but to FIND MY ADDRESS and check in#his words btw. this boy told me to my FACE that me having a private life FORCED him to stalk me to my fucking home#and i just saw RED. good thing is that when i get mad i get icy and brutal so i spent five minutes telling this thick skulled idiot that#he has no right to know anything abt me that i didnt tell him and you know what he does????#this audacious motherfucker says Lets not do this on the porch. and then tries to push his way into my fucking house. thats a hard no for me#so i told him exactly what was gonna happen: he was either going to get off my property and stay away from me or i would call the cops#and remove him by force. id like to say that i literally said he had ten seconds to leave or id start throwing punches#and he goes .... Cant we just talk abt this 🥺??? so i break his nose. and i was within my legal rights to do so bc he was trespassing soooo#yeah anyways i just cannot fucking BELIEVE the entitlement and audacity of some ppl. like its my fucking life i dont have to tell u shit !!!#what the fuck!!! why do they always think im playong hard to get like ffs leave me ALONE#so that was my night 😙✌️ i hope he dies !#hollyws
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capyclub · 9 months
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:(
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yawn-emoji · 2 years
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#who i was march 24 2022 and who i am now are completely different people. i remember crying in caffe reggio to zay sun and adiba because#my dad was in the hospital and we didnt know why and we werent even there to support him and my mom because we had travelled to nyc that#morning. and the whole trip was overshadowed by this sense of grief and fear and horror at what was unfolding back at home while i was#trying to pretend everything was okay and that i was fine. i never cry in public but i cried on the q train while visiting my coworker who#lives in manhattan and then i sobbed in a xi’an famous foods location in manhattan w my brothers because the cheapest and earliest train#home was that night and i had no idea what to do w myself#and when we got home finally we all knew what the diagnosis was but nobody wanted to say it not even the doctors. i dont think anyone used#the actual word cancer to us for months. they cloaked it in such technical terms so as to make it easier to swallow but it was still like.#an elephant in the room yk? nobody told us the stage either but it was a stage iv glioblastoma and i remember going on r/glioblastoma and#just crying reading all the posts abt how difficult this disease is. most projections were six months to a year and a half. a lot of people#even chose not to get treatment because of the high probability that it would make no difference to the prognosis. i have no idea whether we#made the right choice going w chemo or not honestly. only time will tell i guess. inshaAllah this will prove to have been the right choice#idk what im even trying to say now. i just dont reflect a lot on where i was when this started because it’s… almost too painful. i have#given up so much for my dad at this point and i still feel like it’s not enough but also i’ve been trapped by this sickness and i’ve given#up my life to it and idk how to rebuild myself from here. i need to move on w my life but what if these are the last moments w him and i#take those for granted by not staying home to take care of him and spend time w him. again idk what im trying to say here i just have no#idea how we got to this place. it still feels like some insane fever dream that i will suddenly awaken from#seeing pictures of my dad even from 2021 is the hardest thing. i have no idea what happened to that bright funny charismatic loving man. he#is literally a shell of himself at this point and i hate it. it actually turns my stomach sometimes because it all is so wrong#none of this was supposed to happen he was supposed to retire peacefully somewhere tropical in a couple years not get diagnosed w cancer#journal#illness tw
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trekkiehood · 2 years
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Adults: this generation spends all their time of their phones and in front of the TV! They should go out and do something!
Also adults: *calls police on teens hanging out* *won't let children out of their sight* *closes down malls and free hang out places* *raises movie prices*
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chlopieno · 4 months
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This friday sucks super bad so far.
#vent incoming#my boyfriend is having super bad time and it's strongly related to me yet not my direct fault and the only way i could remove#myself from the equation would be completely get out of theor life. and even then i don't believe it would help. there's so much#internalized stuff#bad family stuff#overall so many bad things pilled up one on another that are centered at the topic of identity#and such that yes. i could leave. but then will it help with the homophobia or transphobia he's facing? if he goes back into closet how#will it help if the base of the problem is still there?#i can't help if he doesnt leave and find a space where his parents have no say. i asked him over and over again to go to a psychiatrist#ive been asking him to do it for over a year. and he has a barrier that makes sharing hard for him but for the love of the saints he needs#help from someone who is qualified to do it. i asked him to choose his doctor so he can be most comfortable. i offered to pay for the doctor#in case he has no money. i try so hard to pull him out of this place of self blame and of blame he receives from his parents#from anyone else#i try so hard to let him know he can ask me for help. i try to make him feel comfortable and safe. i want future with him and he made m#me think he wanted it too but today he told me that he doesnt know if getting together woth me was a good choice. and even if he breaks up#with me i will know that all of it is going to stay the same#i really dont know what to do. how to help. how do i make everything better if i cant do anything about his family and his home? he goes#back there and i immediately start worrying about him. he told me he doesnt feel safe in that town and i cant do anything. i cant convince#him to move out. i cant convince him to drop this old life. i feel so helpless
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kuiinncedes · 2 years
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bruh dfhgdfjf
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queeribs · 2 years
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my mom annoys meeeee
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there are so many lives to live
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somerandomdudelmao · 9 months
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I think the thing I keep coming back to is not the enormity of their love it's the mmmm. Consistency maybe? I'm not sure that's the right word.
It's the way it manifests, right? Because of course they love each other, they're family, they're each others whole heart. Of course Mikey will sacrifice his youth to burn the kraang out of Casey. Of course Raph would give the generator at his heart to keep Leo and Mikey and Casey safe. Of course Leo would stay behind with Mikey in a ruined world. Of course Donnie would walk onto a battlefield half dead and fight the kraang off for his brothers. Of course Casey would break the laws of the universe to bring the four of them back.
Of course they would. Because they're each other's whole world. There's no ask that's too large. There's no task too impossible. There's no fight that's too dangerous. Of course they'd hand out these actions, these definitive declarations of love.
Because what other choice is there? When the options are do it or let your family suffer the answer is obvious. The answer is easy.
And those are wonderful ploy points, they're wonderful dynamics and moments and declarations. But they're not what I keep coming back to.
I keep coming back to Leo giving Mikey his hoodie when Mikey wants comfort. To Casey wrapping baby Leo in blankets. To April finding the Jupiter Jim movie and bringing it to watch with Donnie. To Donnie making Mikey young again. To Leo giving Casey piggyback rides, and swinging him around for fun. To Mikey letting Leo's scarf and tassels float with magic. To Donnie letting Casey lay on him. To Raph commiserating with Leo that Casey doesn't remember him. To Mikey comforting Raph when he lost his eye.
To Donnie showing Casey the rain.
Because when you love someone it's easy to give everything for them. To sacrifice yourself, your safety, your life. When the problem is "do something or watch them suffer, watch them die" there's no question to be asked. There's no alternative action to be taken.
But it's harder to remember to do the hundreds of insignificant things that are the actually important bits. The things that you dont have to do. Because no one will die if Mikey doesn't get Leo's hoodie. No one will be in danger if Leo's scarf doesn't blow in magical wind. No one would worry if Casey never saw the rain.
But they're love isn't just about saving each other or protecting each other. It's not about the sacrifice, it never has been.
It's about waking up each day, and spending each moment caring for someone so deeply that you take the time to find your old hoodie wherever it thrown last. Trusting someone so wholly that you share the ways you feel, even when you know there's nothing to be done about it.
Because in the end Casey wouldn't have known to miss the rain. He couldn't have cared either way about it. But Donnie wanted Casey to experience what he viewed as a small joy.
And I think that's what I've been circling for the last 500 or so words. The small joy. And the constant, consistent, never ending effort of creating that small joy for the ones you love. For comforting them. For making them smile.
And what I come back to, over and over, is that the huge moments, where it's all or nothing, when it's time to put everything on the line for those you love, means absolutely nothing unless it's backed by hundreds of thousands of moments where you sacrifice nothing more than a bit of time, or a bit of effort, or a bit of convenience. If you haven't spent your whole life doing the things that aren't a given, and aren't necessary.
Ohhh, it does things to my brain.
One thing I keep reminding myself of throughout the creation of a comic is consistency. I often want to twist some situation so that it's something new and surprising for the characters. You know, in terms of emotions and dynamics.
When Raph bot came home alive and Leo cried. A little voice inside me was saying "what if this is the first time Casey sees Leo cry? Show his reaction! Show how surprised he is!"
Or when Mikey levitates someone. "Come on, draw a surprised face. Levitation is surprising!"
All those little family moments. I keep reminding myself that they are not a group of strangers who become family. They are family. The family family. The familiest family ever jfjfbfhdksk
So instead of
"oh wow did he do that??"
it's
"well of course he did that."
It's about caring and giving and loving to the point where it's something naturally subconscious.
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spheixrie · 3 months
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HOW THEY WOULD MAKE YOUR KIDS GO TO BED (pt. 1?)
So like you're always the one to take the kids to bed right? Since your husband always comes home late since he's busy with hero work. So now you go out with the girls for a girls night, you leave your husband and your kid/s at home and tell your husband to get the kids to sleep by 8:30 (since sleep is important HAHXHAHAHAHAH) anyways you leave your child in the hands of your husband, not knowing what kind of shit they been through while you were gone..
Ft: Midoriya, Bakugo, Todoroki, Kirishima, Kaminari, Sero
IZUKU MIDORIYA
He tries to get the kid to bed and fails miserably. He couldnt handle that little pouty face and those big puppy eyes.
"Mommy said to go to bed by 8:30 didn't she? Well look at the time honey it's 8:30" Izuku says as he tries to calm your kid down.
"NO! I DONT WANNA! I DONT WANNA!" Your kid shouts back as a reply and sticks out their tongue at your husband. "I just wanna stay up and watch All Might!"
Izuku sighs and tries again "Come on baby.. Mommy's gonna be mad at me if you dont sleep right now, we can watch tomorrow yeah?"
Cue the puppy dog eyes. "Please?" Kid bats their eyelashes at your man and he completely loses it.
You come home at around 11:47 and you find your husband and your kid on the couch dressed up in All Might onesies as an All Might video played on the screen.
"Couldn't get them to sleep?" You chuckle as you take off your coat.
"I am so sorry honey" Izuku sighs with a defeated tone "They gave me a hard time"
You just laugh softly and walk over to them, planting a kiss on your husband's cheek "Now you know what I go through while you're at work" you sit down beside them as your child offers you a bowl of popcorn. "Want some, Mommy?" they say as they beam at you. You laugh and ruffle their hair "Dont think that you arent in trouble for staying late, honey"
"But mommm, this is the only time i get to spend time with dad, just us two" They plead as they give a pouty face. You sigh and smile, "I guess you're right" you look at Izuku as he gives you a big thumbs up. You shrug "I guess I can let this slide" You smile. "YAYYYY!!" your child exclaims as you pull you child and husband for a hug. "Thanks honey" Izuku whispers at you, giving you a kiss on the lips.
"Daddd" you kid averts their eyes. "EWWWW!!" he shouts as you and Izuku laughs.
KATSUKI BAKUGOU
Man is having a hard time getting this kid to bed. Since this dude has a sleep schedule of a grandpa, bro's shouting at his kid to get tf to sleep or else he's gonna blow their face up. Ofcourse the kid counters his attacks with the same stubborn attitude until you come home and find them in the kid's bedroom.
"GO TO SLEEP YOU BRAT!" Katsuki shouts. "HELL NO OLD MAN! I AINT GONNA LISTEN TO YOU AND YOUR STUPID SLEEP SCHEDULE!" Your kid fights back.
"MOM LETS ME STAY LATER THAN THIS TIME!"
"WELL I AINT YOUR MOM SO SUCK IT AND GET YOUR ASS TO SLEEP!"
"NO! YOU SUCK IT AND SWALLOW! IM NOT LISTENING TO YOU!"
"YOU DARE TALK BACK TO ME?"
"YEAH THAT'S HOW A CONVERSATION WORKS!"
"WHY YOU LITTLE PIECE OF-"
And they go on and on for hours until the neighbors call you about the noise and you have no choice to go home. You mutter angrily as you drive home. You throw your shoes on the shoe rack and drop your coat off on the couch, marching angrily towards the kid's room. When you opened the door you were not expecting to see them on the bed asleep, your kid on Katsuki's chest as he held an arm around them. On the floor was a pile of board games and book. You sigh and smile softly at the sight, walking towards the edge of the bed Katsuki stirs in his sleep, he blinks his eyes and his gaze fixes upon you.
"Oh, hey baby" He sits up, careful not to wake up your kid. "You're home early"
"I sure am" You chuckle as you kneel down and pick up the boxes of games and books off the floor. "The neighbors told them they heard a commotion, inside our home" You look up at him with tired eyes.
Katsuki sits up and sets your kid on the bed "Sorry 'bout that, baby.. Kid wasn't listening to a word I said.." He says scratching his neck. "I shoulda tried a more different approach than yelling eh?"
"It's fine, babe" You stand up and kiss your husband's cheek. You set the games and books on the nightstand and lean into his ear "But you owe me for ruining my night out"
Katsuki takes your hand and looks you in the eye "I think I sure do" He smirks.
SHOTO TODOROKI
He does try to get the kid to sleep, but the kid is too stubborn. He doesn't want to be like his dad towards his kid, so he does the only logical thing that comes into his mind. He just lets them do what ever.
"You need to sleep now, your mom told me that you need to sleep by this time" Shoto says to his kid who he has already tucked comfortably in bed.
His kid just pouts "But daddd, I wanna stay up late. Mommy rarely makes me stay up late! Plus, it's just us" your child kicks off their blanket and scooches closer to your husband. "I wanna spend time with you daddy! You're always busy at work, I wanna spend time with you" You kid smiles happily and Shoto just crumbles.
"Alright... but don't tell your mom"
"YES!"
You come home to them in the living room playong tea house with a cartoon playing on the tv. Stuffed toys (all having bows and other assorted accessories) were seated all around them. Shoto was dressed up in one of your dresses with his hair done. He was holding up a tea cup while your child was pouring non existent tea into it. You smile at the sight
"What happened to "asleep by 8:30?" " You chuckle as you walked towards them.
Shoto just shrugged before drinking his non existent tea and holds his tea cup for his child to refill it, "I couldn't say no to that face, plus it's non everyday I get to spend time with them like this, I wanna give them the childhood they deserve. I dont want them growing up like me" He says as he looks at you apologetically. "Sorry"
You laugh softly as you sit beside him, giving him a kiss on the cheek "Dont apologize honey, Im glad you're doing this for our baby. You can stay up for as long as you like, just dont blame me if you're both cranky in the morning"
"YAYYYYY!" you child exclaims as they jump up and down happily
Shoto chuckles and gives you a soft kiss "Thank you, honey"
EIJIROU KIRISHIMA
He tries to be the bad cop at first, getting your kid to bed and all, but then your kid starts to throw a tantrum saying they dont want to sleep yet. Your husband keeps on insisting that they have to listen and sleep, but then you kid pulls put the fucking puppy eyes on your husband and he completely loses.
"Come on, pebble! Didn't mommy say that bed time is 8:30? Look at the time! It's time to sleep!" Eijirou says enthusiastically, trying to get your toddler to sleep.
Instead they stick out their tongue and throw a tantrum. "No! I dont wanna! I dont wanna!"
"Hey dont shout at me! I already gave you ice cream after dinner even though im not supposed to! You better listen or I am not holding back" Eijirou says trying to make your kid go to sleep.
"No!" your kid pouts. "I do not want to sleep yet!" They look at Eijirou with puppy eyes. "Please, please, pleaseeee, daddy?" cue the eyelash batting
Eijirou fucking Kirishima on the other hand, loses it, COMPLETELY.
You unlock the front door and hear noise coming from the kid's bedroom. You walk towards it and open the door. Your kid and husband was sound asleep pn the bed... or so they thought they had you fooled. Scattered on the floor were action figures and dolls, and on Eijirou's head was a little bow headband. They pretended to snore noisily and you saw your kid peeking to see if you left, then went back to snoring.
You sniffle a laughter as you walk towards them and drape a blanket on top of them.
"Oh wow I guess they did a good job of going to bed eh?" You say loudly and start walking to the door. "Well too bad, they wont get to have those nuggets and fries I brought" You say loudly.
"FRIES?!" Both of them jumps out of bed and looks at you expectantly. You raise a brow and puts your hands to your hips.
"You really think im that dumb to fall for your so called trick?" You ask with a disappointed look on your face.
Eijirou laughs and rubs the back of his neck "Sorry baby... It was hard saying no to that face"
You roll your eyes and laughs "Now you know what i go through"
Eijirou laughs too "Yeah.. Do we still get to eat those nuggets though?" He asks hopefully.
"Oh the nuggets? Yeah that was a trick" You smirk as dread washes over their faces "Yeah it was a trick, now go to sleep, both of you, or im not cooking nuggets for breakfast"
DENKI KAMINARI
My man Denki here is actually a pretty chill dad, and his kids would do anything he says... if he does something for them first. He actually does a pretty decent job in getting them to sleep, sure he had a couple pf teensy weensy condition but atleast he got them to sleep... at maybe 11:30.
"Hey theree, so like, I know it's not cool to sleep at this hour but like, Im kinda scared of your mommy so if you kids love your daddy, please go to sleep I'm begging you" He says as you toddler is already tucked in bed.
Your kid just shrugs and says "Okay"
Denki, bless his ass, is very very confused "Wait really?"
"Yes, dad" Your toddler nods
"Huh, that was.. pretty easy? Uh so, goodnight hon" He says and kisses your kid on the forehead.
Your toddler smirks and pulls up the big fucking puppy eyes "But before I sleep... can i have one eensy weensy favour?"
Denki you prick
You come home to see the lights in the living room out. Okay that's nice, that means Denki actually got the kid to sleep. You walked toward the room and peek through the door, you smile at the sight. There you see Denki and your baby wrapped in blankets as Denki reads your kid, who was already asleep, a bed time story.
You walk in when he finishes reading and closes the book.
"You did a pretty great job eh?" You say as you kiss your husband on the forehead. "Wasnt to hard eh?"
Denki nods tiredly "Yeah you could say that" He smiles softly.
"Thank you baby, im gonna freshen up" With that, you walk outside, leaving Denki to tuck your toddler in for the night. Little did you know that to get your kid to sleep involved 2 tubes of ice cream, 3 rounds of Mario Cart, 5 Mickey Mouse episodes and 1 fairytale story. Yeah Denki was definitely sleeping for a long time.
SERO HANTA
He's also a chill dad, but when his kid says they don't wanna sleep, it's always 20% 'no, go to bed' and 80% 'sure do whatever, go apeshit'. And oh boy do things get tricky.
"Look, chubbs. Mommy said bed time is 8:30. And it's already, 8:30. So come on you need to sleep" Sero says to your child who was watching a cartoon movie.
Instead they stick out their tongue "No! I wanna finish this movie!" they bat their eyelashes and give Sero the puppy eyes "Pleaseee, dad?"
Sero blinks "Uh sure go ahead" He says sitting beside you kid with a lazy grin on his face.
Your kid, confused, just blinks "Uh, wait, really?" they look at him expectantly
Sero just shrugs and takes a handful of popcorn from the bowl "Yeah sure, I aint scared of your mom, plus it's mot everyday we get to do this sooo, go crazy" he grins and takes another handful of popcorn and pops it in his mouth.
6 movies and 1 cry-a-thon later
You open the door and walk into the living room to see Sero watching a movie with your kid laying on his lap, a blanket draped over them.
Sero looks at you and closes the tv. "Hey mi amor, how was you night out?"
You look at your kid and your husband "Did you let them stay up late?"
Sero just shrugs "Yeah, sorry bout' that. But it's not everyday they get to do this with me y'know?" He smiles at you and you just scoff.
"You're lucky I love you" You say.
He sets his kid on the couch and stands up, he walks over to you and kisses you on the cheek "Love ya too babe"
• • •
"How many movies did you watch?"
".... Maybe 5 or 6?.."
• • •
"Okay, you're sleeping in the living room tonight, Sero"
"Aw man"
THAT'S ALL FOR TODAY BABES. IM THINKING OF MAKING A PART TWO WITH THE OTHER BNHA BOYS SO COMMENT IF YOU'D WANT TO SEE MORE. THANK U FOR READING!!
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slaybestieslay946 · 29 days
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Stay
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pairing: paul atreides x reader
word count: 2000
warnings: light angst with a happy ending
summary: you are the empress of the known universe alongside paul atreides, however, you dont agree with what hes doing, so you give him an ultimatum.
You had always loved the rain. Especially on Caladan. Yes, on your home planet it had rained fairly frequently, but it wasn’t the same. The rain on Caladan came down by the bucket full, not measly little drops. Each minute sheets of water fell from the sky like rolls of silver fabric. 
The only thing that lulled you to sleep more effectively than rain on a window, was the slow, contented breathing of your husband beside you, and the slow movement of his fingers brushing against your waist. Every now and again he’d re-adjust his position to get even closer to you. 
Usually he fell asleep before he was practically clinging to you, but tonight was not one of those occasions. 
“Paul,” You laughed breathily, pushing away from him a bit in order to spin in his arms and face him. 
He groaned in complaint as you moved away from him and opened his eyes blearily. 
“Why’re you moving away…” He complained, trying to pull you back to him. 
“Because you’re practically on top of me, I’m not a hot water bottle.” You chided, although the teasing smile on your face gave away your true feelings. 
“No, you’re better.” He said, a sly smile on his face, “Now c’mere, I’m cold.” 
You sighed, but did as he said, tugging his arm around you and lacing your fingers together. 
You could feel Paul’s smile on the back of your neck as he found a way to hold you even closer. 
“I love you.” He whispered, and you replied in kind, the smile that formed on your face certain to match the one he was currently wearing. 
“Promise you’ll stay with me?” 
“Mhm. I promise.” 
Now, as you paced nervously around the hangar, you couldn’t help but think back to that promise you had made. At the time, you thought that nothing could tear you away from Paul Atreides, not the sun nor the stars. 
Of course, you could never have planned for him becoming Emperor of the known universe. And you could have never known that it would be him tearing the both of you apart. 
At first, when you had been planning your escape, you had hoped that the aircraft would arrive before your husband. That was before you remembered who your husband was now. He would notice you were gone almost immediately, so you had to plan for confrontation, not avoid it. 
“What is this?” A voice came from the entrance to the hangar, echoing through the cavernous room and into your ears. He didn’t sound angry, merely confused.
You turned to face him and his expression was just what you thought it would be, torn between angry and distressed. In his hand, he held the note which you had written, telling him to meet you down here.
“I am leaving, Paul. For Caladan.” You said firmly, turning to face him. 
He smiled weakly, shaking his head, “Why all the smoke and mirrors? If you wanted to return home you should have said so. I would have prepared a ship for us both-”
“Because I am not going with you.” You interrupted, your voice harsh.
“What do you mean? It is not exactly typical for the Empress to leave her husband days after the coronation.” He laughed, but it was not the melodic sound you had once loved, instead it was forced, choked even. 
“Well, you are not the typical Emperor. I am leaving, and you will not follow me.” You stated, remaining firm, even as your heart threatened to betray your mind and run back to him. 
Paul just stared at you, his face painted white in shock. 
“Why?” He asked, his voice cracking.
“Because I can no longer stay by your side and watch you become this. You are becoming someone I do not recognise.” 
“My love, what are you talking about-?”
“I'm talking about this, Paul! Your holy war! You do remember that, don’t you? The war you swore to me you’d do anything to stop? And now, here you are, at its forefront.”
“I had no choice.” He said, his eyes hardening slightly.
“You always have a choice. You are their so-called ‘messiah’. Their emperor. They would fly into the sun if you asked them to. So ask them, stop this war before it consumes everything.”
“You know it is not that simple!” He shouted, and you couldn’t help but flinch slightly before rallying yourself.
“The man I married on Caladan would not have cared about simplicity. He would have cared about what was right, what was moral! He would never have entered this conflict, he would have laid down his life to prevent it! And I would have been right beside him.” 
“This conflict was inevitable! I am doing my very best to minimise the damage, can’t you understand that?”
“I understand that you are still not doing enough.”
Paul looked at you, incredulously, anger filling his gaze, “Really? How can I do more when my own wife does not believe in me! You claim to support me, and yet now you are leaving me. My position is still weak, and you leave the only man you have ever claimed to love.”
“Your position! You are faced with the massacre of your people and all you can speak of is your position!?. Have you no soul left Paul? Did it melt away on Arrakis, scorched by the sun?” 
Suddenly all the anger and venom drained from Paul’s face, and he found himself dropping to his knees, and begging you to stay. 
“You are my soul. You have been all these years. You keep me balanced, you are my morality, my goodness. Everything I do is for you, my love, for your safety. I only care about my position for it is your position also, all the power I have acquired is only in the name of keeping you from harm.”
You looked at him, staring deeply into his eyes, that piercing blue that you had thought so beautiful when they finally changed. Now they were just a reminder of how much he had changed since coming to this awful place. 
“I want to believe you. But you have always had such a way with words. I watched the way you deceived those people into following you, is that what you’re doing now?” 
He rose to his feet again, taking your hands in his. His face was frantic with fear. 
“I would never deceive you. I mean every word, I’ve felt this way my whole life. You are the most important thing to me. You know I would never lie to you.”
For the first time since the conversation began, you hesitated slightly. Could you believe him? Eventually, you landed on an answer. 
“...I do. You would never lie to me on purpose. You are lying to yourself too Paul. You know that I have never wanted position, nor power, heavens, I have never even wanted safety! All I have ever wanted is you, wholly, truly, with no barriers-”
“And you have me!” 
You reached up to splay your hand across his cheek, wiping away the tears that threatened to spill from his blue-blue eyes. 
“No, I don’t have you. I have splinters of you, and I fear the rest is lost. You may bear the resemblance of the man I love, but you are not him.”
He opened his mouth to protest, but no sound came out. 
Suddenly there was the immense whirring of gears, and you knew your ship was here to take you to Caladan.
“I’m afraid we do not have much time, so listen to what I say,” He didn’t react, his face remaining desperate and heartbroken, but you continued anyway.
“If you finally realise what you have done, and you fix it, come to me on Caladan. But I don’t want to see the Muad’dib, or the ‘Messiah’, or the Kwisatz Haderach. The only man I wish to see is my husband, Paul Atreides. Remember that Paul.” 
You gave him one last longing look before turning away from him, and making towards the ship that was emerging from the floor of the hangar.
“I’ll see you again?” He called, his voice cracking slightly as he stared after your retreating form in defeat. 
“Hopefully so, my love, hopefully so.” 
And with that, you stepped onto the outstretched platform of the ship, and shut the door behind you. Paul stayed in the hangar until the craft was gone, biting his tongue so as not to call out to you again and beg you to stay.  
*
The message that the Emperor would be coming to visit you had come far sooner than you expected.  
And you were disappointed in him. He was breaking your agreement, and so soon. It had only been a year, and to your knowledge there had been no change in the situation.
 Perhaps he was coming to ask for a divorce, maybe he’d found someone else since you left. That would certainly be ironic, considering the way he had begged for you to stay on Arrakis. 
However, you were incorrect, because only a few days later a messenger came to tell you that the jihad had ended.         
Immediately you leapt out of your seat, clasping your hand over your mouth in shock. He had done it. 
For the next few days, Castle Caladan was abuzz with preparations for the Emperor returning home. You oversaw said preparations with a watchful eye, and though you wouldn’t admit it, you were happier than you had been in years. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, you had missed Paul terribly. 
Yet, when his ship landed, you were nowhere to be found. 
“Where is my wife?” Paul asked one of your ladies in waiting as he strode through the halls of his childhood home. 
“My lord, she left on a walk to the cliffs this morning, and has not returned since. Would you like me to send someone to fetch her?”
The Emperor’s harsh expression softened slightly. “No, I’ll go.” 
It didn’t take Paul long to work out where you had gone, and as he climbed one of the paths up to the cliffs, he was glad to see you sitting on one of the benches, clad in the green silks of house Atreides. 
He called your name, and his voice cut through the gusting winds into your ear, and you turned to face him with a searching look on your face. 
You stood, and couldn’t help but jog towards your husband, gathering your skirts so you didn’t trip and make a fool of yourself. However, you stopped short of running into his arms, opting to stand just in front of him so you could inspect his face properly. 
“Is it you, Paul? Have you finally come back to me?” You asked, your voice cracking slightly. 
“It’s me,” He whispered, reaching a hand out to touch you, “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you, what I was doing was wrong, and I know that now, and-!”
You cut off his rambling apology by surging forwards into his arms and kissing him fiercely. He immediately responded in kind, wrapping an arm around your waist and cradling your head in his hand, whilst you held onto the lapels of his coat as tightly as you could. 
Despite the fact you wanted to stay like that forever, eventually the need for oxygen prevailed, and you broke away to take a deep breath in, laughing lightly at the sight of his flushed face. 
He grinned at you, moving the hand that was on the back of our head back to your cheek, brushing his thumb along your face. 
“You missed me?” He asked, teasing, but his voice had a slight edge of concern to it. 
“Yes. I missed you so much.” You said immediately, emphatically. Because you had missed Paul, it felt as if you hadn’t seen the real him for years, and the feeling of being reunited was almost too much for you to contain. 
He let out a short sigh of relief, “I missed you too. But it’s ok, because I’ve fixed it all. They still think I’m their messiah, but I’m going to stop acting like it. And you were right, I was power hungry, and selfish, and I exploited so many people, and I betrayed you, and-”
“Enough, Paul.” You said, looking at him with so much care that he couldn’t help but smile softly, “Yes, you have made mistakes, but it wasn’t all your fault. And you’ve made a change now, you’re doing the right thing. And I’ll always be there for you. I had to leave to help you, but I knew we’d see each other again. And here we are, back home, just like old times.” 
“You’re right.” 
“I often am, my love.” 
He wrapped his arms around you once again, “Will you stay with me, here?” 
You nodded, “Mhm. I’ll stay for good this time.”
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leclercinvegas · 10 months
Text
FEARLESS - instagram au
who: mick schumacher x vettle!reader
author's note: tbh he is the whole reason i'm starting this series. tbh idk what era mick is in for this imagine, but just go with it. also some of my fav other people are in this cause i thought it would have been cute. pretend the last pic is mick instead of pierre
summary: everyone can see the spark between the childhood best friends.
warnings: none
mickschumacher posted!
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liked by ynvettle, kevinmagnussen, and 273,466 others
mickschumacher: being home means angie playtime
view all 859 comments...
user1: awww his dog is so cute!
user2: i want to steal her
ynvettle: please tell angie i miss her so much.
mickschumacher: you were here literally 15 minutes ago
ynvettle: your point? im coming over again.
ynvettle posted!
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liked by sebastianvettle, mickschumacher, and 12,348 others
ynvettle: cause she doesn't get your humor like i do
view all 237 comments...
landonorris: you got a dog, any reason why?
user3: shes literally so gorgeous
yourbestfriend: you're my dorothea
mickschumacher: where are my photo credits for 3 of these pictures.
ynvettle: up my butt
mickschumacher: very mature yn
ynvettle: why thank you mr schumacher
jackhughes: come back to the lake house
ynvettle: ill be there in 2 weeks dont worry and im bringing a friend if thats okay
jackhughes: most definitely, the more the merrier
user4: jack and mick meetup? are my worlds colliding?
trevorzegras: you better visit soon
ynvettle: well if you're at the lake house ill see you then you silly goose
jamie.drysdale: i miss you y/n
ynvettle: i miss you more jamjam
user5: since when has y/n known all these hockey players?
mickschumacher posted!
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liked by ynvettle, jackhughes, trevorzegras and 341,436 others
mickschumacher: made some new friends and new memories too
view all 1253 comments...
jackhughes: please come back next summer
mickschumacher: @ynvettle look i made a good impression! i would love to come back!
ynvettle: i figured you would make a good impression. i dont know why you were so worried
user7: oh my god. lake house. mick and y/n. with y/n's friends. things are happening. idk what things are but they're happening
ynvettle: i had the time of my life with you. im so glad you got to meet everyone :)
user8: please tell me thats y/n in the firework picture. please.
sebastianvettle: staying safe i hope
mercedesamgf1: hope you're having fun mick!
trevorzegras: come back mick mouse please.
yourbestfriend: hm interesting choice of pictures mick
ynvettle added to their story!
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ynvettle: wild hockey boys at candian gp
ynvettle posted!
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liked by mickschumacher, jackhughes, and 23,698 others
ynvettle: come feel this magic i've been feeling since i met you, can't help it if there's no one else <3
comments are restricted
mickschumacher: its been years in the making
jackhughes: oh my god finally.
sebastainvettle: i knew this was going to happen at some point. @mickschumacher treat her well.
trevorzegras: please tell me mick mouse asked you and you didnt ask him
ynvettle: thats a secret that ill never tell
jamie.drysdale: i miss you again
ynvettle: ill come back soon or you could always come here jamjam
yourbestfriend: your friends to lovers dream has come true
mickschumacher: what??
ynvettle: why did you have to say that.
869 notes · View notes
iplayghoul · 8 months
Text
hot tub sex wit ony ? drabble ?? oneshot ?? this longer than i thought it wld be i just cant stop talkin... its 11 am bruh
its soooo obvious that im more into a soft sex kinda vibe, always or rough sex written in the most gentle and soft way possible 🙈
so i cant help but constantly imagine hot tub sex wit ony. in my head at the start of the relationship he constantly gravitates towards our apartment. in his mind he felt it was safer for his partners always, not wanting you to feel yk at danger in a man's house despite how safe he made you feel BUT ofc you have a jacuzzi.
in this universe, like in my head, i imagine both ony and reader have jobs in the medical feild likkee maybe ony is a surgeon and reader is a private psychiatrist who sometimes picks up shifts at the hospital onyankopon works at ???
ANYWHO becuzz of this they sometimes work hard ass shifts, whether theyre long or short, its hard as fuckk and they come home tired. ony gets home first, maybe an hour earlier and he has a key card to your apartment so he can let himself in, feeds your pets and relaxes on the couch, thinking of if he should make you two dinner or order sumn.
then he thinks of the jacuzzi, a nice relaxing hot soak after a hard shift is all he needs so he stops petting your cat or roughhousing with the dog and orders sushi, grabbing a drink of his choice whether it be wine, a light alcohol or sum shit for yall to sip when the sushi comes.
i think you get home not long after the sushi is delivered. maybe 10 minutes later and its still fresh and warm OUU shit i need sum sushi rn 😭 and ony fine ass is in some black swim shorts with the sushi all out on a platter wit the sauces on it, and hes got his feet in the water while he jus sits on the side of the jacuzzi and calls out to let yk where he is
you take a quick rinse off before donning a bikini, a black one to match his b4 putting up your braids and joining him on the edge wit a kiss. i like to think ony loooves kissing. he loves stimulatin his mouth n his lips. its a long, soft kiss and u cant help but lean into each other its like ugghh at last i can relax and let my gaurd down and just be vulnerable after being in this big position at work yk? 🤭
so you share several long kissing before both getting waist deep into the hot tub, letting the bubbling heated fun engulf you both as you down pieces of sushi, feeding each other while staying connected at the hip. i think he cant help but put his hands on u, always letting it rest on ur hip. sometimes i tink he jus likes to be touching you at all times its like a safety thing, sometimes jus resting his hand on your shoulder, ankle, tummy, dont matterrr he wants to kno ur there.
its only a matter of time before talking about each others day becomes nothing more than a whisper of a conversation. and ur eyes cant leave each others lips... necks, chests... and then ur kissin again :) hehee and kissin all over each other so tenderly and meek.
just then hes slipping his hands under ur peachy squishy ass n lifting u to the edge of the tub, kickin ur feet in the air and he sees ur toes are done. pretty pink polish with a baby pink french tip, and baby pink flower designs dancing across a few toes ... hes not one to have a raging foot fetish but it entices him,,, sooo he puts ur toes in his mouth and it tickles a bit ! but feeling his hot tongue caress ur little toes carelessly makes u feel all warm, especially ur cheeks.
eeeeek and then he jus cant help but continue to lick , suck n kiss all about your ankle, i imagine ur gold/silver lil anklet has his name awn it cuz he doesnt want u to tattoo his name :<< , but his lips smooth there way up to your inner thighs and hes pullin ur panties to the side so his thick lips can sink into ur thick lips as he slowly jus... makes out wit ur cunt idk if i can even call it 'eating out' anymore, hes in luv with ur pussy. obsessed wit the way u smell down there actually. fuck a roses and flowers smell bitch he is stealin yo panties after a LONG day at work tf 😭 he jus like me fr ok ok.
i jus luv a soft sex moment, his tongue mixes wit u sooo well and ur whines are of no use to him cuz he's havin fun and everythings jus so... slow and relaxed. ur grindin up into his face slow too cuz what else can u do but relax and just let your man do his thing. hes laying his upper body into you, drinkin ur squirt when u cum and mushin his face all in ur cream when u do orgasm, its long and drawn out and so. good.
then he pulls u back in the water wit him, slippin his dick in u fluidly, connecting u both and honestly yall sit there for a good minute. just basking in each others immaculate warmth. the fuck is dragging , sloww and aching but neither of u care to move faster. ur holdin the edge of the tub and hes holdin ur legs up to your shoulders , usin each other as leverage to fuck into the other slow and deep. low moans r harmonizing wit each other and its just... perfect :(
all thruought the fuck n i cannawwt stress this enuf he is kissin on u , he cant help it. he revels in kissin all over ur face and lips even if ur too far gone to kiss him back , kissin on ur neck and ur tits that are all squished together cuz of the position annnnd kissin on ur thighs and ur legss as theyre so far up he can reach em wit his mouth. he presses kisses on ur head too . u deserve it :(( ohh u deserve it so bad and its moments like these that i luv always.
even when u guys cum , ur lips are locked and ur swallowing each others moans, and breathin hot in each others mouths when ur done.
why is this so long notice how i cant shut tf up ab soft sex ???? bye yall !
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biibini · 3 months
Note
Hii!! After mizu graduates college, what type of job do you think she'd have? Would it have to do with sports or maybe something way different? (I absolutely love your writing and headcanons !! 🩷🩷)
modern!mizu post-college life headcanons
tags: post-grad life, engineering mizu, stable work life, a woman in stem, moving in with reader, basketball with mizu, mizu join fencing club, peaceful post-grad life (the dream)
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a/n: ngl the thought of post-college life is tripping me out,,, im a junior in college rn and the thought of it just kinda doesnt?? exist?? also ive heard too much info from my friends' rants ab their engineering degrees and switching majors from mechanic to electrical back to mechanical engineering,, theyre fucking nuts
modern!mizu would prob be in the engineering sector of jobs
wooo stem baby (i am a digital marketing major i should not be talking)
bc hello?? money???
also let’s use that mechanical engineering degree to good use
she didn’t leave home for nothing
with her technical skills from eiji
modern!mizu would probably be a CAD engineer
CAD aka computer aided design
technically speaking, it would allow her to work from home or hybrid
and she can easily transfer her mechanical and on-hand knowledge to a digital format
like she’s smart yall
she just got some troubles w procrastination
but dont we all?
(coping so hard)
this job would also allow her free time and flexible hours to do her job
and i feel like modern!mizu opts for a good work-life balance
if she wishes, she can take the day off snd just go out with u or go to the gym
the freedom of choice while staying comfortable at home?
sign her tf up
she can have her tea time, gym time, spending time w u time, and her self care time
the self care in question: enjoying the silence
and realistically, its a well paying job thatll keep her and u afloat while helping eiji financially if need be
modern!mizu hopes her work and smarts can help her provide for others and herself
its ab time she doesnt let herself depend on a man for money
yeah thats a fuck u to u, m*k*o
shes made the mistake once
shes not gonna make it again
just bc postgrad modern!mizu isnt in sports doesnt mean she’ll stop playing
she needs to get her exercise and movement some way some form
basketball with taigen
and always aim for the three-pointers
and is successful most of the time
and then proceed to aim for the half court shots
and fail most times
fencing with eiji whenever shes back home
she’ll def try to teach u
and its fun at first but
she wants to stretch her wings out
modern!mizu would prob join a fencing club
it would be a great for her to fully practice and spar
not just against her old man
or go soft w u
but also go against ppl her age
modern!mizu would move into a place w u
nothing grand but a small apartment where u could refresh and build the place to be ur own
ringo is a good friend
a true best friend she could trust
but it was time to move in w u
and not be wary of ringo hearing u when he comes home
modern!mizu would be more adventurous in hobbies
yeah she has basketball and fencing and her tea collection
but now she has a stable job
no need to worry about grades
and just to live life one step at a time
she would probably try out pottery with u
definitely practice her cooking with ringo's and ur help
all in all, a very patient life
(she deserves it)
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evie-sturns · 3 months
Text
pick me up - Matt Sturniolo
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summary: you get heavily rejected at a house party, matt comes to pick you up while you're in tears.
contains: !bestfriend matt, fluff, sfw, swearing.
———-----------------*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*---------—————
blaring music rang through my ears as i pushed through the crowd of people, coming face to face with the boy ive had ny eyes on since the 8th grade.
"hey, didn't expect to see you here!" i say chirpily, gripping the red solo cup in my hand as my knuckles turn white. he looks me up and down "well obviously im here its my fucking houseparty" he says blankly, i feel the tips of my ears go red as all of his friends stare at me.
"oh, must've forgot." i say nervously as i look everywhere but him.
the silence grows between us as i regret not drinking more earlier, im notoriously more confident when drunk. suddenly my mouth opens.
"wanna go upstairs?" i say biting my lip and looking up at him.
all of his friends collapse into laughter, including him. "yeah.. nope, your probably the last person i'd choose. sorry." he says, turning his back to me, he laughs to his friends "who does this desperate whore think she is?" he scoffs.
i feel my eyes burn as i rush towards the front door, i swing it open "what the fuck dude" a guy yells as the door smashes into his knees. i ignore him as tears well in my eyes, i run down the front steps of the porch, theres a few people scattered in the front lawn.
the music becomes more muffled and quiet as i run farther away from the party. i take a seat on side walk reaching into my purse for my phone as my hands shake, tears stream down my cheeks as i dial matts number.
matts been my bestfriend for as long i can remember, hes the only person whos been there for me through everything, hes also the only person that would be awake at 1:30am.
the phone rings 3 times before he picks up.
"matt?" i say sniffling.
"y/n? you alright, i'm about to go to bed." he mumbles into the phone.
"please pick me up, i shared my location" i say shakily holding back tears.
"ugh. fine." he groans, clearly not noticing how upset i am.
i look up as i see matts van driving down the street, he honks twice as his van approaches me. i stand up as his car gets closer, the headlights shine right on my face, which had mascara smudged all over it. his face instantly drops as he sees mine.
he jumps out of his van and speed walks towards me "hey, hey what happened?" he says looking at me, worry spread across his face. i don't respond, i know i'll start crying if i do.
without warning he picks me up, carrying me as he opens the passenger side to his van placing me down and buckling me in.
he sits down in the driver seat and looks me in my eyes, my bottom lip quivers as i try to maintain eye contact. the lump in my throat grows as he stays silent, waiting for me to speak.
suddenly i burst into sobs, matts eyes instantly widen as he grabs my hand. tears flow down my face as ragged breaths escape my throat.
"matt i asked him if he wanted to go upstairs with me, he laughed, so did all his friends, he said.." i squeeze out in-between sobs as i throw my face into my hands
"what did he say?" matt says calmly, but i can sense his worry.
"he said i was his last choice, and i was a desperate whore." i cry.
matt stays silent for a few second "oh sweetheart.." matt says leaning over the cupholder and pulling me into a tight hug. "you wanna come home with me? i think it will be easier." he says trying to distract me and i nod.
(20 minutes later)
my tears have stopped for now, i dont want to make matt feel bad.
we pull into his driveway and he helps me out of the car, grabbing my purse and holding my hand, taking me inside. "nick and chris are asleep, so try be quiet okay?" he says softly as we walk into his room.
i bend over to take off my black heels. matt rummaged through his drawers and pulls out one of his t-shirts and some sweatpants, "you can wear these, they'll be too big but its fine." he says handing them to me.
"you didnt have to-" im cut off my a finger on my lips "its literally the bare minimum, go get dressed." he says smiling and pushing me into his bathroom.
after a few minutes, i walk out into his bedroom, he's on his phone lying in bed. "feeling better?" he says looking up at me then standing up. "yeah matt, honestly thank you." i say as he pulls back his duvet covers. he walks over to me and picks me up, launching me into his bed from a meter away, i gasp loudly as i hit the matress. matt collapses into laughter "my bad."
i catch my breath as he yanks the cover up to cover me, "wait matt where the fuck are you sleeping?" i say concerned. he walks over to me and pushes me to the side of the bed. he leaps into bed beside me, launching me a half foot into the air "are you trying to kill me matt?" i say slapping his arm as he laughs.
"go to sleep." he says pressing a kiss to my forehead before laying down beside me.
———-----------------*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*---------————
cute!! dont be shy send me some requests yall
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