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#if you guys have any resources you want to share it would be awesome even book recs would be greatly appreciated
notveryshrugemoji · 2 years
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Your kind words about pencil crayons did not go unnoticed. Correcting my earlier post they’re actually Prismacolor, not Prismacolour. Anyway I got the Under the Sea pack (obviously) lol
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#i think all of the things that *stick* with me are things I don’t reeeeeally talk about on here#sometimes I have some deep introspective thought about it while I’m#high and then I move on lol#like y’all I lost 60 pounds last year and hardly mentioned it here????#i know I talked about it but not REALLY about everything#it’s like they’re habit so I don’t think to post here? ya know? anyway I’ll never show you any art because that makes me feel itchy#I’ve been actually learning! im focusing on faces right now and I really want to learn how to draw#i don’t mean realism I just mean I want to find some sort of style I enjoy doing#if you guys have any resources you want to share it would be awesome even book recs would be greatly appreciated#anyway art is fun and I think you should do it sometime#it feels good and it forces me to be more observant & becoming more reflexive now when I’m out in the wild#i take more pictures now!!! maybe I’ll share sometime#and I’m talking like any of this is good or even considered art lmaoooo it’s not#but I’m having a lot of fun!!!#i like pencil crayons and water colour and definitely black scratchy pens#i use a lot of washi tape and I’ve got like 3 books on the go#one is for *serious attempts lol* one is for *fuckin around* and one is for *actual art lesson practice*#I’m just watching YouTube and vibing mostly#the cool thing about learning from people on the internet is just how encouraging they are to keep working at it#anyway if every post tonight isn’t some indication that the bong rips I took tonight almost took me out l m f a o like bitch SHUT UP now#go do some art and SHUT UP hahahahaha#okay okay okay love u thanks for listening#this is truly my most cherished place on the internet#I’m glad we didn’t turn into Reddit weirdos lol#i kind of did but tumblr is home lol okay GOODNIGHy
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fasa-umich · 1 month
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End of the Road || Bryson Johnston, FASA's 2023-2024 Co-President
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It’s that bittersweet time of the year again, saying goodbye to my position and the awesome experience it gave me. It feels a lot different this time around knowing I won’t be writing something like this again. If you’re reading this I just want to say thank you for the impact you’ve had on me and my journey through FASA, no matter how big or small. You mean a lot to me and are the reason I wanted to climb so high up within this organization in the first place. If I’ve known you for the past three years or just met you during my time as president, I want you to know that you’re so cool and awesome and I’m happy we’ve gotten to share this community together <3
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all right, look at these boys
MY EXPERIENCE/ADVICE/WOW THAT WAS FUN
“Being president would be so cool” -Bryson (March 2023)
Oh and how cool it was. 
I used to think that I was just the tinik dude who loved getting on stage with all of his friends, and I lowkey was. But then somehow I ended up being a performance chair for this org and was shocked when I came to the realization that I could be more than the tinik guy! I could come up with ways to make this organization “better” and make my journey one that facilitates other people’s journeys. Without losing any of the fun I joined FASA for in the first place, I could be a leader and role model for those around me. I didn’t know the end result would be me sitting in the position of presidency, but I sensed myself growing professionally and just fundamentally changing as a person. This growth eventually got me to March of 2023 where I was saddened by the idea of no longer being a performance chair. Me and Caitlin had so much fun together in the position and I made so many new friends and memories as a leader of FASA performance. I was heavily considering rerunning for the position, but I knew that Ash and Kendra were probably going to be able to do something with it that I probably couldn’t even dream of (they did). That’s when presidency came into the equation. I could still choreograph and teach people dances, the thing I loved most, but I could also lead a board behind the scenes and prep FASA’s next generation of leaders. I could be a role model and leader that people looked up to and came to for help for more than whether they had to do a regular or half turn next. 
I’ll be the first to admit that I underestimated presidency. I fell through in a lot of ways, and I’ll admit that I wasn’t the greatest at doing some of the advice I’m about to give. It’s a unique job that requires more than just your typical time management skills and solid work ethic. Just doing the work you have to do isn’t enough. You have to lead by example. When you think of people to “look up to” in FASA from a board/professional view, the presidents are probably pretty up there on the list. As soon as you show that your heart’s not in it, no one else’s will be either. Why would someone care for something if the person who’s supposed to be leading them doesn’t? Surely it can’t be that important if my leader doesn’t think it is.
Learning to be empathetic is essential as a president. Everyone lives a different life, and with that comes different time commitments, academic tribulations, and personal issues all independent from their role as a FASA board member. It’s easy to get wrapped up in the “FASA is life” mindset which is why it’s so important to take a step back every now and then. You don’t always need to understand the situations that people are dealing with, a lot of the time you just need to understand how they feel in their current state. Solving the issue won’t always be possible, so you need to do your best to be an accommodating resource for your boardies who comes off as kind and caring. People need to feel comfortable coming to you with concerns and you need to feel comfortable easing the pressure off of them and letting them know FASA doesn’t need to be at the top of their priority list and that they can take care of other things they have going on. And if they’re issues are FASA-related, you have to accept that even if you don’t agree, it’s still an issue for them and you are responsible for coming up with some form of solution or compromise. The great thing about this is that with each situation you handle well you come across as more and more trustworthy and capable of doing your job.
The final thing I learned while being president is the importance of being able to take criticism. I always told myself that I was good at it because of my time as performance chair. That was a role where you know you’ll never be able to make EVERYONE happy, so I got used to knowing that some people weren’t happy with what was going on. The issue was that it was never really brought to my attention or put in front of my face. And when it was, it was usually an issue with choreo I made and I’d acknowledge that it was hard to do or just outright bad, and I’d change it. It’s a whole different situation when one of your board members comes to you with concerns about board or how you’ve been running it. Being president, even if issues with board aren’t specifically targeted at you, it still feels like they are. You’re supposed to be the overseer of everything that goes on, so when there are issues, it’s easy to take blame and feel like you aren’t good enough. However sometimes the blame will be targeted at you. It’s important to fully listen to everyone’s concerns and give thought to everything that is brought up. What you can’t do is let it get you down. Even if you can’t really come up with a solution after problems have been presented to you, it’s important to roll with the punches and come out of the situation knowing you’re still capable of being a leader. You may have faltered at some points but it’s never too late to fix what you’ve been doing and turn back to a positive direction. Take criticism, do what you can to make it better, and remember that you were elected into the position and are fully capable of leading this organization.
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shoutout AHAP and modern tinik from PCN this year you guys were so much fun
THOSE WHO MADE IT POSSIBLE <3
My inspirations :)
JC You’ve been my closest friend in FASA for the past 3 years ever since Jolene and Autumn paired us up in Runaway Baby for our first PCN. Having such a close friend at every FASA-related thing I went to made it so easy to learn to be myself and grow confidence among a group of complete strangers. I definitely doubted myself in the position of president when it first became an idea I had, but I made the best choice I possibly could’ve made by having you be the first person I ever talked it out with. You helped me turn it from a distant thought or idea to something I could actually do and feel confident in myself doing. You’ve supported me from start to end, being a voice of reason and giving me perspective through every part of the journey. I honestly wouldn’t have made it out of many of the ruts I ran into this year within the position without you being there to hear what was going on and letting me know that I had nothing to worry about and was valid in my actions. You’ve been a friend, dance partner, co-choreographer, co-boardie, a real one… the list goes on. I don’t think you’ll ever be able to fathom the impact you’ve had on my journey through FASA and honestly life in general (but that’s a different story). Thanks for all you’ve done my boy.
Jolene My long lost sister who’s footsteps I haven’t stopped following in. Choreographer, Lil Nas X stan, lineage beefer, intern reject to president pipeline, FAM Head??? (We’ll see about this one). You’re someone I’ve looked up to ever since joining FASA, being a president within the org and a true role model and friend outside of anything to do with FASA. I always admired the amount of work and effort you put into FASA and wished I could leave at least somewhere close to as big of an impact as you did. When I came to you to talk about presidency, I went into the conversation looking for information on the role and instead came out feeling confident that I could not just be president, but also thrive in the role. You made me feel like I was worthy of the position and that I was someone people would look up to and follow if I were to take it on. You boosted me up and made me realize that if it was something I wanted, I’d have at least one loyal supporter out there. You made everything I was able to accomplish this year possible and I could never be more grateful for you. Thank you big Jo.
Sean I’m not bolding your name but shoutout you.
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BOARD (love you guys)
You guys were so unbelievably amazing to work with throughout the course of this year. The amount of sheer passion exuded by each and every one of you was genuinely astonishing. Knowing that it would be all of you on board with me this year was a huge reason I even wanted to run for this position in the first place. Knowing that I’d be stepping into presidency with all of you to watch over and assist was so enticing and made the transition into the position so much easier. I’ve never seen a group of people so passionate about anything, and it was such a pleasure being able to reach the peak of my commitment to this org that’s given me so much alongside you all. I won’t say that I got to know all of you super well on an individual level, but I’ll always remember the connection we shared as boardies together, and this year will definitely go down as one of my favorites ever. Being president definitely had a learning curve and came with a lot of struggles down the road, but I knew I had a super supportive group of individuals who were understanding if called upon and independent in times they needed to be. It’s been such an honor being able to put my name next to the rest of yours, in the position of president at that, and I won’t take any of what we accomplished this year for granted. We saw a record number of new members, events, programs, time commitments, and problems never tackled before, yet we came out on top of all of it and have this past year to stand beside and be proud of. If any of you guys are reading this I want you to know that you did the most for FASA, board, yourself, and me this year. I’m endlessly grateful for the constant effort you put into your position and our board. Whether it be events you put on, general members you made feel at home, or the vibes you brought to our board meetings, you were an essential part of our board and you should be proud of yourself. I want you to know that I’ll always be a fan of you and am so extremely confident that you can accomplish anything you want to in your future endeavors. Watching you grow this year and become the person you are now is proof that you have a strong will, you’re determined, and you’re willing to do whatever it takes to make your dreams come to life. Thank you so much for the time you gave to our organization this year, if you don’t feel it’s been paid back to you fully yet, it will be, I promise.
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the force is strong with this one
Alyssa
Not gonna lie I still don’t understand how you legit just spawned into my life our freshman year. Like I didn’t know of your existence until I was at a bangko practice and Kris was like hey Alyssa and Bryson you guys are partners. Then I was like oh dope another freshie (even though you’re old wth) cool. Little did I know two years later we’d be co-presidents leading FASA, the organization we were just jumping on and off some benches for. Your work ethic and constant drive to better our organization was so admirable this year and I found myself in awe at how much you cared about the work we were doing. The number of times you went out of your way to do things we didn’t have to do just to make sure everyone else had an easier time or to ensure that FASA would come out as a better organization was amazing. If initiative was a human being, her name may just be Alyssa Caldito. You always seemed to be in the know about everything going on within FASA, not even just board but in general. I always thought it was funny people would snoop through each others’ folders but when we’d get into a board meeting and you’d just know literally everything going on with every person in every position I’d just sit back and be like damn what am I even doing here rn. There were a lot of times I questioned whether or not I was doing enough as president having you as my co and knowing that I probably wouldn’t be able to work at your pace or with your passion even if I tried my hardest. It would’ve really killed my confidence if it was anyone but you being a co-chair literally anyone would beg for. But you constantly made me feel like we were a team and tackling everything together. It was never “I did this” or “I’ll do that” it was always “we” with everything you did. Even if you did most of something or even just outright did it without any assistance from me, you made sure I was included and that we were a team in this role. I knew that if I was lacking at any point in time or needed a break from our duties you’d instinctively cover for me without concern and make it seem like it was still two people getting the job done. When I was in the early stages of running for president and knew that you were running for sure, I knew that if I was to get elected, I would have absolutely nothing to worry about. Because in my head you were already one of the presidents for this year as soon as I heard that you were even considering running for the first time. And knowing that you’d be my co if I got the position was like being told I’d have to take a test but I could have a cheat sheet with all of the answers on it. I never once questioned your ability and was instead questioning if there was a limit to what you could do. I feel like I watched everyone but you on board grow this year and go from what they were at the start to the confident and proud people they are now. With you I feel like we started the year and I was like yeah she could literally do anything that’s going to pop up this year right now in this current moment and come out of it as if nothing happened. Not to say you didn’t grow because that’s messed up LMAO but that you didn’t necessarily need to grow into your position like the rest of us had to in some capacity. The moment you were elected you were FASA president. It wasn’t an oh yeah she’ll learn the ropes as she goes or nah don’t worry she’ll have other people around her to help. It was oh yeah Alyssa is the president. Like yeah, she’s just the president. I’m so grateful you were the person I got to ride with this year, I’d have it absolutely NO other way. I’m so glad we got a lot closer and were able to build our own relationship as we fostered the relationship of our board as a whole. Thank you so much for such an amazing year co, we popped off.
Ash and Kendra
Hello successors. I really haven’t even felt fully comfortable telling people that I was a performance chair in the past because I compare what I did to what you guys did and I’m just like bruh. You two have been so instrumental in FASA’s development as it grows and grows. You took us to Battle this year, something I used to dream of doing but wasn’t able to do during my time. And at that, you guys did it without help from anyone in FASA who’d competed in the past. You didn’t just lay the foundation, you mfs found the land, flattened it out, did some dirt checks to make sure it was suitable, drew out all the blueprints, found the resources you’d need to build the impossible creation, took initiative in obtaining funds for your dream, and ultimately crafted something FASA boards are going to use for years to come. What you guys did with Battle was no easy feat, and I really hope both of you take the time to sit and think about what you guys did. Like we really went out there and GOT THIRD TOO. Not gonna lie I truly thought we were just heading out there for a fun time and to introduce our dancers to Battle and what it was like. But we pulled up and Pamana’d all over them. All jokes aside, you two have a lot to be proud of, and I’m proud of you guys. I know it was hard, but you did it, and you did a damn good job of it too. You guys have revolutionized FASA performance in more ways than one. Performance is probably what I’m most passionate about within FASA, and I’m going to walk away from my experiences in this org remembering your guys’ time as performance chairs more than my own. I have people I see as board positions based on who’s held the positions during my time in FASA, and you guys are without a doubt my performance chairs. Anyone else who steps into the position has MASSIVE shoes to fill, and I’d honestly advise them not to try because I don’t know if it’s possible. Thank you guys for bringing one of my long-term dreams to life and for making performance what it is after this year. You two took the reins from me and Caitlin, drove straight into the unknown, and came out as a duo who’ll go down in FASA history for what you’ve accomplished. Thank you both.
Taryn and Izzy
Hi guys. Congratulations on being selected by the people of FASA to lead them and their organization. You guys have been entrusted with the responsibility of spearheading FASA, and I have no doubt the two of you will do great things with the position next year. It’s super exciting to be president and you’ll have a lot of energy at the start of your term when you start going through with your presidential duties. I’d highly recommend to pace yourselves and make sure you keep up a consistent amount of energy throughout the entire year. Burnout can hit really hard in this position not necessarily from workload, but from the weight of facilitating the dynamic of board as a whole. Things will go wrong, and you’ll probably be quick to blame yourselves. “We’re the leaders” “We’ve been on board before, why can’t we make this work?” I’m not saying everythings going to be hard, but you’ll encounter situations where you’ll feel you’re at fault for something that went wrong. It’s so important to not let it get you down. You have to bounce back every time and remember why you ran for this position in the first place. Working alongside you guys this year showed me that you guys are extremely capable individuals that can handle difficult situations that come your way. I know that you can handle whatever board life has to throw at you, so make sure you believe you can too. Make this position your own and leave behind a legacy you’ll be happy with. You guys are going to do amazing things and I can’t wait to watch it happen. Congratulations again and go make FASA what you want it to be!
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We are so goated
GOODBYE!!!!
Thank you for reading my testimonial from my time as one of FASA’s presidents! I loved being in this position and it’s taught me so much. FASA is such an amazing organization with amazing people, and I’ll never forget everything I got to do this year. I won’t stop supporting this community and I hope I left a mark that positively impacted at least one person!
Much love,
Bryson
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mymoodwriting · 3 years
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@xcharlottemikaelsonx
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“So… what exactly can you do?”
Taemin chuckled. “Excuse me?”
“You’ve been so focused on training us, but I don’t think I even know what your power is.”
“I suppose that’s true.” A bunch of objects in the room started floating. “I’m telekinetic.”
“Oh, that actually makes a lot of sense. I figured you were pretty powerful.”
“We all are, especially you.”
“But how did you… I couldn’t read your mind? How did you keep me out without your shield?”
“My power… the Organization was happy with me, but there was always more that could be done.”
“What do you mean?”
“It was the molecular things they pushed me to control.”
“The what?”
“As long as it’s real in any capacity, it’s at the mercy of my will.”
    All the objects that were floating settled back down, and then you felt a gust of wind blow past your face. You looked around for a moment before you realized it was Taemin’s doing, realizing he had a little tornado in his hand.
“Wow… you…”
“It seems rather impossible, I thought so too at first.”
“So my brain waves… are technically physical, so you can disrupt them yourself.”
“Pretty much, it’s like I can mimic your powers to some degree.”
“To be able to do something like that… you must have gone through a lot…”
“I did, and I’d go through it again just to be at this level.”
“The rest of us won’t be at your level… not for a long time, or ever.”
“That’s alright, I don’t need you to be.”
    There wasn’t that much tension in the air anymore, everyone was trying to focus on being better. Mark did figure out a way out of his restraints, incredibly impressed with his own abilities. Despite the rocky start, he seemed more eager to learn and try new things, figure out what else he was capable of. Lucas also improved, he wasn’t kept locked up, and was actually capable of walking around the base blindfolded. Kinda creepy but he also thought it was cool.
    Taeyong seemed to be working the hardest. His collar had also been removed and he was training with himself. Seeing multiple versions of him wasn’t new, but it was the interaction. They were Taeyong, you could have a whole conversation with them, talk about things from the past, and the little flirty moments were so Taeyong. Although you felt a bit bad that you couldn’t tell who was the original.
“So, this means you’re always available, right?”
“What?”
“If you can just clone yourself like this, then I can always do things with you.”
“Like what?”
“Well while you’re busy with whatever, I can just go with a clone or something for ice cream.”
“I… yeah, I guess.”
“Awesome!”
“Except it can just be me, and the clone can take care of all the other things.”
“That sounds like you being lazy.”
“It’s being resourceful.”
“And how many can you make now?” Taemin asked. “I only see four, excluding yourself.”
“It’s not easy, and what are you expecting? An army?”
“I’m sure you’re capable of creating one.”
“No.”
“Why not? An army of Taeyong’s, I just need to borrow two, maybe three.”
“Ya! What are you thinking about?”
“Just that one clone question thing right now… why?”
“Gross.”
“So are you gonna answer?”
“No.”
“On another note.” Taemin interrupted. “You’re all making good progress.”
“And what’s that progress for?”
“Information. I have… a subject who has intel in regards to the Organization. I’m close to extracting the information I need in order for us to make our first move.”
“And what would that be?”
“As you can imagine, there are multiple locations, and I doubt my source knows where HQ is.”
“Don’t you? Weren’t you their top operatives?”
“We were just weapons, and with our desertion I’m sure they’ve made some moves. Our information is outdated at this point, so we need a refresher.”
“Then what? Storm HQ and not die?”
“You’re underestimating yourself.”
“Is this why you want an army?”
“We don’t need an army. The Organization has contingencies for me and my boys, but they have nothing to stop you.”
“Let’s say we get in, then what?”
“Don’t you want revenge? Perhaps not for yourself as I understand you don’t have a personal grudge, but thousands have died, and who knows how many more.”
“I’m not killing innocent people.”
“Hm, I know, there’s no need for casualties. What we need more than anything is information. We’re proof, we just need more to back up our claims. This isn’t something I intend to keep to myself, the public needs to know.”
“So when do we move?”
“Soon, I hope. You’ve all improved and are certainly better suited for my type of field work. I just want to make sure someone else is prepared.”
    Taemin glanced over at you, but you were oblivious to the situation, chatting away with another Taeyong. You had already heard the plan so you were just waiting until it was time to execute. You were aware that you certainly weren’t ready for the field. You had been training to use your powers, not to fight. So you weren’t sure what you’d be doing, but you hoped you’d still be helpful to everyone.
“You gotta be faster.”
“I can’t move as fast as you.”
“Not with that attitude.”
    Kai was obviously the best person to train with Mark, he had patience, but it would only go so far.
“My portals are different compared to you just teleporting.”
“Not as much as you think. Using your power should be second nature. You should be able to will yourself wherever. Your powers aren’t necessarily an extension of you, they are you.”
“The theories you’ve given me about how to use my power sound impossible.”
“And I once thought it was impossible for me to just teleport a building into space but here we are. Believe in yourself, and try, if you don’t think you can, you never will.”
“You’re full of a lot of inspirational speeches.”
“Be grateful that’s what you get.”
“What motivated you to do better?”
“My life.”
“What?”
“If I didn’t improve, if I didn’t do better, I didn’t get a break, I got pain. If I wanted to live, I had to do better.”
“You guys really went through hell, didn’t you?”
“Pray you never do. Now let’s go again, get across the room in less than five seconds.”
    Lucas’s training was really more on him. Without his eyes he had to learn how to use his hearing for everything. Once he had calmed down he was allowed to roam the base. Ten was the one keeping an eye on him, making sure he didn’t get himself killed, but it was an easy job. While watching Lucas, Ten could focus on his own powers. Healing a plant made sense, it was the other part that was complicating things. The painting Taemin had destroyed was still in pieces, and he was supposed to fix it.
“How are you supposed to fix a painting?”
“I’m not entirely sure.”
“People make sense, but things? Just use glue.”
“I’m supposed to be the glue.”
“Weird.”
“Says the guy who hasn’t seen anything in like a week.”
“I can see! The world just isn’t in color… it’s like grey with white outlines… there’s another door, besides the one we came in through, and there are three other tables in here.”
“Huh, so you can see.”
“Yeah so when do we take the actual blindfold off?”
“No idea, you’d have to ask Taemin.”
“Are we ever gonna do anything?”
“He says soon. He almost has what he wants.”
“And what would that be? He never really told us everything.”
“Information or something.”
“Look, using our powers like this, cool, but should we really be trusting them…”
“We don’t have a choice, remember. It’s not like we can leave.”
“This isn’t how you treat the people you trust.”
“It goes both ways, and I don’t think they trust us either.”
“So how does he expect us to be a team?”
“I’m not sure… he must have some plan for this, for us… but I don’t know what it would be.”
“Shouldn’t we be trying to escape then?”
“We can still use him. Learn to hone our own powers, and then when we get out of here, we split. Just be patient, okay, and focus.”
“You too, it’s weird that you’re staring at an apple and a mug.”
“I’m training!”
“Still weird.”
“That’s so cool!”
    You watched the little orb of light fly around the room. For once Taemin was giving you a bit of a break, having Baekhyun keep an eye on you. Since you had the time you asked about his powers, and the kind of things he could do.
“You can also create hallucinations, right?”
“Yup.”
“Have you ever used them for fun?”
“Fun? What do you mean?”
“Well… you can make it so it looks like we’re underwater. See the fishes or a whale up close!”
“I… I never thought of something like that.”
“Yeah, like a cool party trick.”
“Hm, I don’t think I’ve done anything like that.”
“I could help. I went to this aquarium when I was a kid, I still remember it vividly, well mostly. I could share the memory with you and then you could like… recreate it, if you want that is, I don’t just wanna intrude in your mind and… do things…”
“No, no, that… sounds cool, I wouldn’t mind.”
    Baekhyun took off the bracelet that kept you out of his head, closing his eyes and welcoming you in. It was funny, but also nice to know he trusted you enough to just let you in. You hadn’t actually connected with anyone else besides your boys, at least not in a friendly way. It’s hard to describe, but Baekhyun was pretty quiet, unlike the mess the others could be. There wasn’t resistance or hostility, as if you two were just holding hands. You happily shared your childhood memory of the aquarium.
“Have you ever been to the aquarium?”
“A long time ago.”
“We should all go again sometime.”
“I like that idea. For now we have this.”
“Hm?”
“Open your eyes.”
    When you did you were met with wonder. Fishes swam by you, and you could see them all around. It was like you were inside the tank. You got up and looked around, following some of them as well.
“This is amazing. Your powers are so cool.”
“You think so? Check this out.”
    Some dolphins swam past you and then circled around. You were practically living a child’s fantasy. While you watched the fishes in awe you weren’t aware that Baekhyun was watching you with that same look. He had never used his powers before in a way that would make someone smile and laugh, instead of scream.
“We should do a beach next time! Or like a safari!”
“I’ll look into it.”
“You’ve slowed down.”
“What?”
“Is four your limit? Because that’s pathetic.”
“You think it’s so easy?”
“Of course not, but you’re not trying that hard.”
“You expect me to make a million copies of me or something?”
“More than four is possible. It’s a miracle you’ve made one, imagine what you could have done if you had discovered this power sooner.”
“Yeah? Like what?”
“Look after y/n.”
“Excuse me?”
“What? Didn’t you ever think how reckless you guys were? Going off on your own for fun and leaving her alone, unprotected?”
“She-”
“My team had been monitoring you for weeks before we made contact, and I had known about y/n since the beginning. Do you know how easy it would have been to find her and take her? It’s fortunate I had no intention of sharing her discovery with the Organization, or else this conversation wouldn’t be happening.”
“Are you making a threat?”
“Hardly. I’m giving you motivation, if you could do this all along you could have made sure she was never alone, never felt useless to the rest of you. What would have happened if the Organization went after the four of you? She’d be left alone, abandoned, and eventually one of you would spill the details on her.”
“We wouldn’t have!”
“They have their ways.”
“Shut up!”
“Even then, you think one is enough to look after her? My team and I have gone missing and now you have as well, they know something is happening. Will one little Taeyong be able to protect her from an army? I am not asking you for one Taeyong, I am telling you to do better than four! You’re capable-”
“Shut up!”
    Taeyong threw a punch, but Taemin easily dodged it. He wasn’t expecting such a response, but welcomed it.
“You definitely need to do better than that.”
“You suck at motivation.”
“I’m better trained than you Taeyong, do you think I can’t take you down? Perhaps more than one will be a challenge.”
“Fuck you.”
“Not even gonna try? Maybe I should have y/n come in for motivation.”
“Leave her out of this!”
    Taemin shoved Taeyong back, a smirk clear on his face. Taeyong of course took the bait, creating two duplicates. For a while Taemin amused him, but he didn’t hesitate to snap the necks of the duplicates. Taeyong collapsed from the pain.
“You can’t even handle the pain of death, how can you expect your duplicates to be any better than you?”
“What… what do you want?”
“You. Come on now, you only feel the pain of your duplicates; death, not so hard to just have them take me on, huh?”
“You’re… horrible…”
“Not really, so how about-”
    A hand wrapped around Taemin’s throat, another copy spawning from Taeyong. The boy was taking the advice, but it was only the start. It seemed that Taemin had pushed the right button, as Taeyong remained on the ground, but kept having doubles come at Taemin.
“I suppose it’s easier to have your doubles fight? Isn’t it? Did we learn something new?”
“Shut up!”
“It’s just a simple question. I want you at your best.”
“If you do this to me, what have you been doing to y/n?”
    This time a knife was at Taemin’s throat, one of the copies getting a little creative. The real Taeyong was practically out of breath on the floor.
“Nothing bad, just what’s necessary.”
“Necessary? So if I asked her, she’ll say she wasn’t hurt? I already heard from Ten that she sprained her wrist. Care to explain that?”
“She can explain it herself if you’d like. She’s stronger than you all think. No wonder she works so hard to improve, she doesn’t want to appear weak to the rest of you.”
“She’s not weak!”
“Did you ask her? After all, you always left her at home, a-”
“Alone, yes, I’m aware! We had to protect her!”
“From what?”
“Everything! She’s a damn telepath who doesn’t know how to control her powers! All she had was us to lean on! Do you know the kind of outbursts she had when we first got our powers? She’d wind up hurting us by accident and crying until she passed out. We… we…”
“Sedated her without telling her in order to help.”
“… how…”
“I did a proper check up on all of you when you arrived, and I found drugs in her system. She doesn’t seem to know, and as they’ve worn off she’s happy to believe she’s improving. Which she is, but she still thinks she’s weak compared to the rest of you. You’ve all left her with that.”
“What were we supposed to do, huh? She was going crazy with guilt, planning on running away to keep us safe, how could we let her go? None of us could possibly help her any other way.”
“Until you met me, of course.”
“And what exactly is necessary for her? If you do this to me?”
“You? You’re not the real Taeyong, but you’re the Taeyong I want.”
“Huh?”
    Taemin used his powers to get the knife away from him, knocking the duplicate to the floor and pinning him beneath his foot.
“I could kill you right now and you’d turn to nothing, but you see, I need you more than the real one.”
“What the hell…” The real Taeyong hissed. “… does that mean…”
“It’s simple really. Your duplicates now aren’t an empty shell, they’re you, with memories and thoughts of their own, but they’re only a part of you. I needed you to create many more in order to get exactly what I needed.”
“And what’s that?”
“The version of you that understood me and my goals. Creating duplicates excessively and in excess would only cause your mind to fracture, and this one right here is the one I was waiting for.”
“Me?”
“Yes, you. Would you like to know what my plans truly are? With y/n that is?”
“What?”
“I need her to figure out how to push her will onto others. It doesn’t matter if we can break into a building and steal information, it’s the people and the information in their minds that we need. Only one of us is capable of getting that, and it’s her.”
“You want to put her out into the field? She can’t-”
“Oh no, you misunderstand. I just need her to figure it out, to do it once for me, and then we can move forward. She’ll be safe and sound, and properly cared for while we do the dirty work.”
“And why do you need me instead of the original?”
“Because, after I get what I need, she’ll have to be made docile. We can’t have a pretty girl with the power of mind control walking around, she’d be a danger to all of us and herself. It’s not like any of us would truly be able to stop her if she was at full power. I’m certain Taeyong over here doesn’t like that idea, but I believe you understand the bigger picture, don’t you? After all, you were the one willing to admit what you’ve done so far to keep y/n safe.”
“… what about the others? They won’t like something like this.”
“Ya!” Taeyong yelled. “Are you-”
“He’s you Taeyong, don’t be so upset. As for the others, don’t worry about them, I’ll handle it, so, are you with me?”
    Taemin stepped off the other, holding out his hand. It took a moment, but the copy reached up and took it.
“Glad we’re on the same page.”
“What do we do about the original?”
“That’s easy, we just need to keep him quiet and out of the way. From now on, you’re the real Taeyong, got it.”
“Yeah.”
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Worthy (pt4)
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Author’s note: I am crappy at tagging people. Inbox me if you want to be added, and just keep poking me if I keep forgetting to add you. <3  @rampant-salamander @bolontiku​
I had to wonder if the powers from Thor’s hammer included allowing me to disappear into the floor so I would not have to face the source of my embarrassment again. I wanted to slam the bathroom door and lock it and hide until Thor left. But I somehow guessed his sense of chivalry would be too great to just leave me to die of embarrassment and he would do something stupid, like breaking down the door, to ensure I was okay, instead of just understanding I needed to lick my wounds in private. Particularly when he thought humans were prudish about nudity. Did they walk around in Thor-land buck naked all the time? I mean, if they all looked like Thor that might not be a bad thing. I was far too conscious of my lumps and cellulite and stretch marks to be okay with joining them in the nude party though. 
I dropped the towel and looked at myself in the floor to ceiling mirror, trying to guess what he must have thought when he hauled me off the floor. I was pale. I’d been far too busy finishing my thesis to be out in the sun in the spring, and it was obvious by the way my arms were the same fish belly white as my stomach. The time spent in the lab showed on my tummy and hips and thighs, all of which were broader than they’d ever been before. My roommate had said curvier was a nicer word, but I knew exactly how many slices of pizza had contributed to each new curve, and the fact that none of that skin had seen the sun in months made me feel bigger. I couldn’t lie and say I was completely unsatisfied with my body. I was just bigger than I’d been, and more uncomfortable in my skin. I’d promised myself I’d find some sort of activity to balance with my work life, for no other reason than for my health. I just didn’t buy into hating myself because I didn’t belong on the pages of a magazine. My body housed my brain, and my brain was pretty awesome. The rest was just packaging and resources for keeping my brain safe and at optimal function. But that was what I thought. I cast a critical eye on myself trying to figure out what Thor would have thought seeing me bare-assed on the floor. Given his impatience with my modesty, he probably hadn’t thought much at all.
I pulled my pyjamas on, and had to laugh at myself. The spaghetti strapped tank-top and boxer shorts didn’t cover much more than my towel had. But I couldn’t cross the living room again to find something else if I ever wanted to get rid of the man-god sitting in my living room.
I steeled my courage and opened the bathroom door. He’d figured out how to turn on my television, and had stopped on what appeared to be a documentary about the Avengers Initiative. He laughed at the television and shook his head, then clicked it off when he realized I’d come into the room. 
“Do you want something to drink?” I offered.
“I rather think you do not wish for me to stay that long, Ella Carmichael.” He pushed himself off the couch and walked into the kitchen where I was refilling my wine glass.
“You know, you can just call me Ella. It’s weird to use someone’s first and last name,” I commented. “Are you sure you don’t want a drink? I hate to drink alone.” I held the bottle up in offering. I could see him hesitate for a moment, probably contemplating the honour involved in drinking wine or something.
“If you insist,” he smirked. I poured him a glass and came around the kitchen island to hand it to him. When he took the glass from me, he narrowed his eyes and took my wrist into his hand. He turned it over, palm facing up and ran his thumb across it. I’m not ashamed to admit I got goosebumps; it was more intimate than I’d been touched in recent memory. 
“Have you always had that mark?” I realized he was running his thumb around my left hand in a pattern. I looked down, but couldn’t see anything out of the ordinary.
“I can’t see any mark.” I pulled my hand away and held it under the bright light over the island. Nothing. Thor took my hand again and looked closer, and traced the design out again on my palm. He was seeing something that I was not. He dropped my hand and picked up the hammer from where he’d placed it on the floor by my front door. He put it carefully down on the granite countertop of the island, and pointed at a big fancy three pointed knot on the face of the hammer.
“This is called a triquetra. It is also on your hand. I would know how long it has been there,” he explained. I shrugged.
“Well, I can’t see anything at all. But that’s the hand I picked up myewlnor with. Maybe it left a mark?” I knew I was completely butchering the name of the hammer, but god knows I couldn’t remember how to say it.
“Mjolnir.” Of course he would correct me.
“Mee-owl-neer?” I tried again.
“Mjolnir.”
“M-yol-neer.” I was reasonably sure I had it right that time. He nodded, and took my right hand in his, flipping the palm up. He traced his thumb around in the same pattern.
“It’s on this hand as well. This is a mystery. I do not know you well, Ella, but Tony seems to think you quite intelligent. Intelligence is not all there is to worth. But it is perhaps somewhere to start,” He pondered. I bit my lip.
“I don’t know how you judge worthiness where you’re from, but I’m not anything special. I don’t run around rescuing kittens from trees, or saving maidens from dragons, or curing cancer. I can’t even donate blood. I have some weird antibody.” I protested. Thor’s mouth cocked to one side in a grin.
“I have never done those things myself, and yet I am worthy. I will speak to my father,” he determined. He finished his glass of wine.
“You appear well. Your colour has come back, and you no longer show the signs of shock. I bid you good rest, Ella Carmichael. Thank you for sharing your libation with me, and for indulging my concern,” he bowed his head a little, hefted the hammer and turned. I followed him to the door. He turned as he crossed the threshold and placed a hand on my shoulder. “I will bring news once I have more understanding of what has happened.”
XXX 
“So Thor saw me naked last night.” It was quite possibly the best first-line I’ve ever had. And I got to drop it on Angela as we walked through the build-a-Belgian-waffle line. She dropped her fork on the floor with a loud clatter.
“What? Naked? How?”
“Well, it all started when I had no clothes on,” I began.
“Seriously, Ella. What happened?” She demanded.
“Seriously. I was taking a bath and he knocked on the door. I figured it was you with the passcard, even though I’d said it could wait. So I wrapped my uber-skimpy-Stark-Industries-micro-towel around me, figuring I’d be opening the door a crack and accepting a passcard from you. He was at the door. And he just invited himself in, plain as you like. Said he was concerned about me,” I started. Angela shook her head, and as we walked through the waffle decorating station, I finished filling in all the details. 
Once we were seated at a table, she took one of my hands and looked at it.
“I don’t see it either,” she sighed. “Do you suppose he has weird powers that let him see through things? Maybe that’s why he didn’t care that you were naked. Maybe he sees all of us as naked all the time.”
“You’re confusing him with Superman,” I laughed. “He has x-ray vision.”
“Superman is a comic book character! Thor is real! Who knows what all his powers are.” She cut her waffle up and started in on it. I pushed my waffle around the plate a little and drank my coffee. I didn’t like waffles. At all. I ate the mountain of fruit I’d piled on top of it, but couldn’t bring myself to get into the waffle itself.
“Well, not making a big deal about naked women is one of them. He made it clear he thought my prudishness was weird.”
“He’s weird. Most men would be hard pressed to not scope you out, regardless of how cool they tried to appear,” she stated, and then made a gesture that looked a little like jazz-hands. “Oh-em-gee! Boobies! Play it cool, dude. Play it cool, and she won’t cover up and then?  More Boobies!” Her fake-guy voice was hilarious.
I snorted on my coffee. “I’m hardly in peak physical condition. He probably was just horrified by the wiggly bits and stretch marks.”
“I don’t think they see past the boobies, to be completely honest,” she laughed. I shook my head and finished my fruit. I’d effectively smushed up the waffle until it looked like I’d eaten some of it. 
“What is on the agenda for me today, boss?” I changed the topic and drank my coffee. Angela pulled out a tablet and flicked through it.
“More orientation stuff. We’re going to go to distribution, and learn how to requisition things for your project. And how to req for your apartment too. And how different the two forms are and how important it is to make sure you use the right form,” she started. “Here’s a hint. The importance of using the correct form is inversely proportional to how similar the forms are to one another. You won’t believe that will take most of the morning, but it will. Then you’re seeing Markus after lunch.”
“Can I order bigger towels from distribution? Because the towels in my apartment are ridiculously small.”
“I don’t think so. But you can also requisition outside items from your in-suite purchasing app. Or I can just take you to Macy’s after work,” she suggested. “Are you not going to eat the waffle?”
“Confession?” I made a face. She nodded. “I hate waffles. They’re like a pancake with a skin disease. Disgusting.”
“I take back every nice thing I said about you. Waffles are amazing. Those are flavour pouches.” The look on her face was enough to make me bite my lip to prevent the laughter from slipping free. She was gripping her table knife like she might actually stab me. It would be a sticky ignominious death by maple syrup.
“Flavour pustules, maybe. So gross. I’m more of a bacon and eggs girl,” I admitted. Angela shook her head, her eyes cast downward in disappointment. She finally cracked the tiniest grin.
“Damn good thing you’re funny. Because that might be a deal-breaker otherwise. Come on. Bus your table. Let’s get you off to distribution so you can learn about the pedantry of requisitions.” She winked and grabbed her tray, leading the way over to the kitchen cart before directing us back to the elevator.
Distribution might not have been mired down in red tape, bureaucracy and shenanigans if they’d had a single window. But they were located in a sub-level of the building, below the parkade, completely walled in. There was a single door in, and it was right beside the loading bay. The staff kind of looked like they were a lost race of mole people. They were pale, suspicious of visitors and seemed a little paranoid that the rest of the company was out to make their lives miserable on purpose. The main stock clerk all but hissed at us when we came in. 
Angela made quick work of running through the requisition forms. There was a single line that delineated personal requisitions from project reqs, and it was required for payroll deduction where appropriate. It was fair enough, but wouldn’t it have been simpler just to colour code the forms? I asked Angela as much and she clamped her hand over my mouth.
“Do you want to be barred from ordering things? Don’t rock the boat!” She hissed. “If you can control yourself, I want to show you heaven. This is the one thing that distribution does right.” She led me over to a table that had a pile of different catalogues on it. “This is the only part of Stark Industries that is still analogue because catalogues are so much easier than websites. And here’s where your colour coding idea comes into play. Blue catalogues are filled with workplace supplies, divided by shade of blue. The light blue cover is office supplies; the dark blue cover is electrical doodads, etc. You’ll learn them as you need to. The yellow covers are personal items. Light yellow is Stark Industries branded stuff. I do most of my Christmas shopping in the light yellow. My dad has a thing for polo shirts and golf balls. Goldenrod is household items that are covered by your living allowance. Stuff like bedding, kitchen utensils, towels. I think there’s a surround sound upgrade in there.” She handed me a pencil and flipped the Goldenrod covered catalogue open to bathroom stuff. The towel page was dog-eared. Apparently I wasn’t the only one who hated the mini-towels that came standard in the room. I filled in a requisition for towels and a plush bathrobe. 
Angela brought me back to the stock clerk’s desk and walked me through the process for submitting the order. It was complicated. I almost expected to need to know a secret handshake to complete the transaction.
“So that should all be delivered before the day is over.” She led me back out of the department. True to her word, the distribution department and requisition in-service had taken us almost to lunch. We stepped off the elevator on the floor for my research division. “I figured I’d show you your desk before we eat lunch.”
We rounded a corner into the lab area. The space was wide open, from window to window. There were workstations at the periphery of the room. I assumed the conspicuously empty one was mine, but Angela walked right past it to a desk that was covered in stuff. There was a pile of paperwork on one corner that at first glance I thought was probably the information relating to my proposals. The desk itself was one of the Stark Industries touch responsive computers that I’d been desperate to try since the first time I saw one. The monitor was carefully suspended from the ceiling, keeping the desk as clear as possible. On the far side of the desk was a small cactus with a little plastic welcome stick pressed into the dirt, and a box of office supplies.
Angela made quick work of logging me into the computer. The log in sequence unlocked the desk drawers, so I was able to clear my desktop with one sweep of my arm into the top drawer. Angela sucked in her breath in response to the action.
“I will organize myself later. For now, that desk needs to be clear, if I’m ever going to work at it,” I explained. She grabbed the cactus protectively and held it away from my reach. 
“Promise you won’t hurt the plant,” she demanded. 
“Sure,” I agreed. She put the plant back down and disappeared across the lab, quickly returning with what looked like a shelf. While I watched, she mounted it to the window behind my desk. How she did it was a mystery, it looked like it was just hanging there. Some sort of mysterious Stark Tech, I suppose. She took the cactus and placed it on the corner of the shelf, her shoulders square in defiance of my otherwise blasé organizational skills. As though she already knew that I wasn’t going to organize my desk drawers later. I looked over at the desk beside me and saw that all the way down the bank of windows, there were shelves mounted against the windows, holding the various personal treasures of the employees assigned to each desk. My shelf looked kind of boring with just the cactus on it.
“Okay, let’s get lunch. You’ve got your meeting with Markus in 45 minutes.” Angela steered me back out of the lab and over to the elevator.
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i saw that you play genshin impact, so i’m kind of curious... what’d be the axis and allies’ vision and weapons?
Uh oh...now you got me started. Be warned, it’s a long one cause I have no self control
Some key terms for those who don’t play genshin impact and want to be included!!
Cryo -> ice, Hydro -> water, Dendro -> nature, Geo -> rock, Pyro -> fire, Electro -> lightning
Hilichurls: a common enemy found in the wild. Despite looking like hairy trolls, they have a district language as well as texts, art and song that they share together making them an advanced species!
Ruin guards: another enemy. Giant, scary robot...they scare me...
Knights of Favonious: an organization of knights within Mondstat that keep order and peace :) very nice guys and gals over there!!
Mondstat: modeled after Germany
Liyue: modeled after China
Alfred: pyro, claymore, Springvale Mondstat
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Alfred would be a super heavy hitter in battle but his drawbacks are that despite his energetic nature, he’s slower because of the weight of his weapon
He blows stuff up a lot and sets all of the grass around you on fire so if you fight with him...His teammates will take damage from him Jeez Louise!!!
Since we don’t have all of the nations of Teyvay unlocked, I don’t know where he’d be from! I’d have to explore to get a sense for it so for characters that don’t have a place on the map yet, I’ll mark them with an asterisk from now on! :)
Idk where he lives but I do know that he’d be a devoted member of the adventurers guild! He’s always willing to offer a helping hand to anyone in need! Wether it be helping Granny Ann make hash browns or taking comissions to go kill a huge ruin guard who’s terrorizing the town!! He’s always leaping into new jobs! He isn’t even in it for the money or rewards! He just loves helping out!
Arthur: Dendro, archer, Mondstat
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Artie is a beast in battle! Shooting vine Aries at enemies to tie them up or temporarily blind them??? Sick as fuck. Keep in mind, Genshin doesn’t have any Dendro characters that are playable yet so idk how they’d fight but I think I can guess :)
Artie is technically part of the knights of favonious because he works in their library. He translates books written in ancient texts into the standard language so historians and others can read what the old civilizations had to say
Instead of having normal eyes, they’re slit like snake eyes. And he has leaves instead of hair :)
He has a little seelie that floats around at his side. He talks to it but it doesn’t really do anything but provide company to a lonely guy :’) he needs more friends
Matthew: Anemo, catalyst, *
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It’s always good to have a catalyst on your team! Ningguang is a great example of an underestimated catalyst cause she can do INSANE damage man!! So I think Mattie would be the same way
Matt isn’t violent and doesn’t enjoy fighting so his in-game voice lines would say that lol
Mattie is an alchemist! Well...A student alchemist. He didn’t take up an interest in alchemy until like, 3 years ago so he’s got a lot to catch up on still! He’s doing his best!
He gets very annoyed with Alfred since Mattie is detail oriented and gentle...Alfred is not any of those things. But he still loves his brother and on rare occasions, he’ll assist him with his commissions
Ivan: Cryo, catalyst, Liyue(temporary)
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Ivan would be a support character for sure but he’d do a damn good job of doing it
He’s buff but he doesn’t do hand to hand combat, he’s mastered magic for a reason
Ivan spends most of his time studying hilichurls. He writes books about them, translates their texts and acts as a peace keeper when he can. He gets information from them about the Abyss Order in return for free reign of small portions of protected land where they can live without fear of being killed
Because he’s from Schneznya(spelling?) he’s kinda expected to be a bad guy but he left a long time ago. But he still sounds like he’s from there and...He’s super pale too so there really is no mistaking where he’s from
Ivan can’t stand how ignorant humans are towards hilichurls so he does everything he can to advocate for them. He’s covered in scars from when he first started engaging with the beasts. A huge scar runs down his face but he doesn’t mind it
He’s got big, sharp teeth!! So he doesn’t often smile cause he thinks he looks weird
Francis: Hyrdo, long sword, *
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Fran is underestimated when it comes to combat (like Kaeya...I see you slandering this man) but he has so much potential!
Since he’s a hydro, he is so useful for elemental reactions! If he’s paired with a cryo or pyro user, he’d totally boost them!!
Fran is a traveling entertainer, he goes between the 7 nations as a singer and actor for small stage plays. He has a crew of friends who travel with him, they’re one jolly bunch!
He always acts all nonchalant and stuff but once he’s in a battle, he’s wild. Especially if the abyss order holds up his crew on their way to their next tour destination “We need to be in Liyue Harbor in four hours you are NOT holding us back!” *tidal wave*
He’s a regular tavern hopper! A very recognizable face since he’s been banned from a handful for getting too rowdy
He can make not one, but 2 special dishes :0
Yao: Dendro, polearm, Liyue
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I just imagine him as a shorter, richer and cooler version of Zhongli
He’d do that kick move that Zhongli does with his polearm oh man that looks SICK dude!!!
Yao would shoot vines out and they’d strangle enemies for a few seconds before disintegrating but if he’s leveled up enough, they’ll totally strangle those stupid hillichurls lol
Yao sells rare gems and other miscellaneous items for very high prices in Liyue where he grew up. His shop is upstairs by the Fatui bank. Rich people enjoy looking at what his shop has to fifer and will argue prices with him. They’re getting scammed for sure. He’ll list a set of cor lapis earrings as $50,000 and the rich will be like ‘I’ll pay $25,000, no more than that’ and he’ll take it!!....Cause thise earrings are worth $5000 at most >:)
Hes close with a lot of the higher ups in Liyue and is often invited to fancy lunches or dinners where they discuss policy, contracts and vendor permits. He doesn’t really get a say in any of that but he benefits from listening
Kiku: Electro, claymore, *
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Kiku would be SUCH an awesome electo user are you KIDDING me??? I can see it now, him swinging that huge sword around, purple lightning bolts flying all around and he looks like a total badass? Amazing vibes
When paired with cryos???? He’d do an insane amount of damage fr
Kiku runs a small restaurant where he...runs the place...but doesn’t cook. His restaurant is extremely exclusive and people often throw fits when they can’t get in cause the wait list is over 5 years long. He’ll rest his hand on their shoulder and smile ‘is something wrong? I’d love to take a complaint if you have one’...No one has even dared to complain to his face lol
Behind the restaurant front he deals with the Fatui, buying and selling minerals or artifacts. That’s where his knowledge is at, not with food. He pays his staff to ignore what goes on behind the scenes and the locals are too busy enjoying the restaurant to question what goes on after dark
Gilbert: Pyro, long sword, Mondstat
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Gil would be one of the free characters given to you at the beginning of the game but hey, I’m not complaining
He’s highly destructive and very chaotic in battle, he can do that spin move even though that’s meant for claymore users
He’s Mondstat’s biggest trouble maker. He runs an underground gambling room that sits underneath a tavern. He isn’t really into gambling but he makes a lot of money by running it
The only knight who knows is Ludwig which is not good cause...Gil pretty much bribes his brother into not telling the knights of favonious (peace keepers of Mondstat)
Gil never got his gliding certificate cause he kept flying into buildings. He broke his nose doing that lol
Lovino: Pyro, catalyst, *
I can’t add anymore images so imagine a floating, red and black orb. Lovi doesn’t get a book catalyst cause he doesn’t read :) That’s the catalyst thing I’m talking about 😅😅
My guy has the angriest in game voice lines, he’s inconvenienced by every battle, every enemy is ugly and a fuckin disaster. He’s just. Angry.
He’d be a super weak character if he needed to rely on hand to hand combat but he learned magic for a reason babey
He owns a flower stand in his country and makes all kinds of beautiful flower arrangements. He even picks his own flowers in the fields when he can (but usually pays the town’s children to do it for him to ‘teach them the value of hard work’).
Everyone knows he’s a total hothead and will piss him off on purpose just cause it’s funny lmao. But then somehow...Their hair or clothes will just...catch on fire. So is it really worth it to tease him? :/
Feliciano: Hydro, archer, Mondstat(temporary)
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I feel like Feli would also be a free character, not cause he isn’t good or anything! But you always need an archer on your team!
Feli has healing properties for his team and doesn’t do an insane amount of damage but when given the right resources, he’d be a pretty sick healer
He moved to Mondstat to join the church there. He leads prayers in front of the church and sings in the choir inside.
He is the sweetest and has never committed a crime in his LIFE but he’s afraid of the knights lol he’s terrified that he’ll get in trouble and be kicked out of Mondstat forever! That would never happen but he’s a worry wart cause of his brother
Ludwig: Geo, long sword, Mondstat
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Lud is the only one that I could really think of as a Geo but Geos are awesome :)
He’s a hard hitter but has like...No shield so he’ll take damage fast if you don’t give him those artifacts with shield in them or whatever lol uhhhh I wouldn’t know anything about that cause I suck at building my teams ;-;
He’d totally be in with the knights of favonious! (I think that’s spelled right lol) but he’d take his duty as a knight very seriously!! He’s a familiar face around Mondstat, the elderly absolutely adore him and the local teenage girls swoon over him which he finds super embarrassing lol
He has to work hard to keep Gilbert in check cause even though Gil isn’t a knight, his actions reflect negatively back on Lud very often... :(
Please ignore the spelling errors and terrible photo cropping on my part lol this was so fun!!
By the time you’re seeing this, ive already made full outfit red sheets for everyone mentioned above!!!! :D
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projectshadovv · 3 years
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going through Silent’s story so far, and can I please offer some feedback? Don’t take this to heart or as an insult! I genuinely want to see this story reach its full potential! I’m tryna see how silent is good for the clan, im not blaming her, but a story would usually point out how shit isnt her fault, but it feels like the story is indirectly blaming her for everything that's happened
like, i feel you want Silentshadow to be a nuanced character who sometimes makes the wrong choices that came from a bad place, as well as dark and gritty - But….we haven't been given a reason to care about her or her goals, and her struggles.
And from learning about more of the story’s other characters, Russetstrom and Auburnfur are more interesting characters to relate to; their struggles feel genuine and I can understand why they do the things they do.
I’m not saying to make Silentshadow more of a hero, anti-heros/gritty characters can work. But the overall vibes silent gives is melodramatic and not…. relatable? if that’s how I can even word it, like, maybe having her not becoming leader and being a part of a prophecy can help make her more relatable, have her work hard for her goals and achievements and show readers that you don’t need to be in a high position to make a difference - like, maybe she isn’t the chosen one, but the chosen one of the prophecy (mudnose maybe?) does things wrong or twists the prophecy’s wording to fit his own agenda? I don’t know, just ideas I’m rambling about. Again, I personally just want to see this story reach it’s potential. After all, it’s natural stories usually change plots dramatically before a plot is decided on and finalised.
Again! Please don’t take this to heart! I just wanted to give feedback.
I appreciate the thought and care that made you want to send this ask, and i know it comes from a genuine place, and i do understand your POV, but try not to fret too much! Silentshadow is a very deeply rooted and personal character to me, I used to project thru her, and i still sometimes do, the experiences Ive given her I've tried to evolve into more story like and plot important events.
And also, theres a lot to the overall story you guys don't know about, I have a lot more stuff in the back I just, either havent felt the need to share, or havent been able to- and Silentshadow's story is a story for me, not so much as me trying to make this story FOR anyone else. Its not FOR you, i'm just simply sharing what i want to share with yall, and if yall like it, awesome! If not, totally understandable.
But since you in particular want to see the story flourish, I'm afraid you'll just have to find it in you to keep a lookout. I'm not going to justify or try to prove anything to anyone, not because I don't have everything figured out (although yes some things i dont have figured out), but that, I'm just having fun with it! Silentshadow doesnt have to be your favorite character! She's just a creature trying to live (sometimes suffer- she's intentionally edgy like that)
Try to think of the story as a very loose allegory for dismantling the rich upperclass/goverment. The clans in general are a very basic representation of fascism that an outsider like Silentshadow growing up, wonders what the point of Clans and borders are if all they do is prevent other cats who aren't them from surviving. They took over the forest that all cats were once free to come and go as they pleased (namely cats like Silentshadows fathers, who were left to starve or be chased out or to seek out kittypet life), but now the forests and mountains and rivers are off limits to any resource the clan cats have staked an imaginary claim on.
Forced to live in Clan society, Silentshadow grows angry and bitter at the life she's given and expected to live up to by cats and dead ancestors who aren't even her own. She's treated as a weapon, as someone to use as a trumpcard in the future, not as a clanmate or friend or family member and the realization of that darkens her heart. She's taken in by (clan)cat's who also want to overthrow the clans, but more for their own greed and lust for power and just the wrong reasons.
Silentshadow, as a kit, always wanted to see the Clans come together as one, or to let those who want to roam freely do so. A kit's fantasy dream. But it gets lost along the way when cats like Mudnose and Bearstar are more immediate problems and take up more of the story's time.
Basically though, Silentshadow does humble up and becomes leader to protect the ones she loves, and recruits many good cats along the way that help her dream become a reality. And while it's not realistic that every single Clan cat would be up to simply being a Colony, theyre at least free to do what they want, so long as it doesnt interfere in other's welfare.
There was originally going to be like, have all the leaders still, just all leading together, and Silentshadow is one of them, but I think i'll make it so she decides she never wanted to be leader (more like, she had to), she just wanted to live freely and made the stand to fight for her and others' right to. I think when everything has calmed, her, Cometshine, and Auburnfur decide to travel- something Silentshadow's father loved to do but couldnt since he was raising his kit, and run off into the sunset.
That's a super super super messy and vague way to explain the story, its a very long and drawn out story, but you can kinda tell theres a lot i just dont have time to write out- just this took me like 2 hours. Just trust me when i say theyre all good characters, not the BEST written or have the best reasons or motives, but theyre good and for understandable and SOMETIMES relateable (or not) reasons. Maybe you dont relate to Silentshadow, ok! Maybe Cometshine, maybe Foggycloud, maybe Auburnfur and Russetstorm like you said. I'm trying to make a diverse cast for everyone and also NOT everyone
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monster-bait · 3 years
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Hi, Mx Nascosta, I've been following you for a long while now and I really admire you as a writer and now as a published author. I'm currently editing my own paranormal book and I'm looking to get a headstart on marketing with social media. So far, I've been building a following on Twitter, but I was wondering if you had any tips or could share what you've been doing? Thank you!
Network, participate, make friends — rinse and repeat, rinse and repeat. Becoming involved in a community is the quickest way to gain a foothold within said community. Social media is definitely a case study in reaping what you sow, effort-wise. Beyond that, don’t spread yourself so thin that you’re not able to make an organic impact.
I’ll use myself as an example: I have the best interactions with people here on Tumblr. This is the kindest social media platform for creators, I’ll fight anyone who claims differently. There are no funky algorithms, no blue check-marks, no influencers. The ability to engage directly with readers has been a gift over the past year and a half. I’ve put the most into this platform, between my masterlist (I posted content every single week during the first year of my blog, until I got sick,) the Monster Matches, my askbox, etc — and as a result, you guys have been wonderfully supportive, and I can’t thank this community enough. 
The other platform I give my time to is Instagram (and I would really, super-duper love it if you guys followed me there as well!) My IG is only about a year old and it’s only in the last 6 months or so that I’ve been posting on it regularly. I followed a BUNCH of people--other writers, book bloggers, publishing houses, merch shops, etc--and I interacted on their posts, reblogged in my stories, etc. The more I shared and commented, the more other accounts interacted with my content and stories. I still don’t have a ton of followers there (like less than 500) but the engagement with other authors and bloggers and my patrons has been consistent, which makes up for the lack of reach. As a result, 50% of my ARC team came from IG and I’m still reaping the benefits of word-of-mouth within that community even though GW is almost 2 months old at this point.
(And just to change gears for a hot second...reach is important, obviously. That’s why it’s important to reblog vesus liking creator posts, but follower count isn’t everything and it’s folly to get too wrapped up in it. I have less than half the followers of some other writers in the Tumblr sphere, but quality engagement is what’s more important for me, and has had the biggest impact on the reach of my work. Don’t ever let yourself get too caught up in the follow counts and notes on posts. Find your tribe, the people who are passionate about the story you’re telling, and the numbers will follow!)
I put very little into Twitter and virtually nothing into FB, and as a result, I get very little back in return. 
I’m going to write a post later this week about my learns in the wake of Girls Weekend, I’ll tag you in it, if you’d like! (I’m going to be posting Alder the Ghillie Dhue’s revisit in the next day or so and polishing that up is my first priority before I work on anything else... @tmnt-bucklover, I hope you really love Cambric Creek, because this is less of a “monster match revisit” and more of a “these characters are a permanent part of the community now, so get used to it” story.)
I will say this—Girls Weekend is almost 2 months old at this point, still technically a “new release” but also an old dinosaur in the world of Amazon publishing. As of today, it’s still in the top 100 of three different genre categories, I’ve sold copies every single day since release, I’ve sold out of book boxes twice, and I’ve not spent a single penny on advertising. It’s 100% because of the work I put into building relationships and readers in the community here and on IG—that means all of you guys—and my wonderful patrons. I would love to be able to tell you it wasn’t work, but that would be a *tremendous* lie. It causes my heart an ENORMOUS amount of joy to hear you’re already thinking ahead on that angle of publishing. One thing to keep in mind: you’re not on anyone’s timetable but your own if you’re publishing independently. You only get one release per book. Even if you’re done, even if you’re edited and formatted with a killer cover and you’ve worked on your blurb and are SO READY to publish...give yourself the time to do it right. If you make mistakes--and you will--good news: you can learn from them and do things differently with the next one. But there’s no one holding a clock to you, so if you feel like you want to work on building your community first, you have the latitude to do so.
Talk about your book, talk about your characters, be your own biggest fan. Your passion will attract the passion of others. And I’ve said this before, but I will repeat it a hundred thousand times—you guys can ALWAYS tag me on stuff you’d like boosted. I don't have the biggest platform, but it’s a damned good one with awesome followers and readers. Whether that’s a story, an announcement, artwork, cover reveals, contests—use me! I’m a free resource!
💖💖💖
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werezmastarbucks · 4 years
Text
more like honeymoon [2]
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previous part
word count: 3769
warnings: loving couple throws fists
music: in the text
LOS ANGELES by blink-182 segment
You had a dream that the prison world was being destroyed. The fearful suspicion was on the back of your mind at all times, but you didn’t know how to express it. Kai always said you were the more paranoid one. All the bad outcomes, you always considered them. You argued that this kind of pessimistic outlook saved your live even when you didn’t know it did. Well, look where you are now, he would reply. Not that it’s bad, so I don’t know what I’m trying to prove here. He just liked to argue.
The white light together with earthquake came, and the ground crumbled beneath your feet. Kai was somewhere away, you could only see his silhouette as he stood on a hill or something. You were now staying in Los Angeles. The end came while you were running to him, the whiteness becoming your least favorite color. Your heart was tearing apart because you were so tired of something constantly trying to stop you from being together.
You woke up in your happy crowdless realm, the queen of enclosed nothingness, and felt like you wanted to go home for the first time. Just because this dimension was more fragile.
Kai was sleeping next to you, his nose deep in the pillow, and you had no idea which part of him was responsible for breathing. Like in a trance, you crawled out of bed and left through the balcony doors to look down on the city lit by nobody, to make sure the world was intact. It didn’t, and wouldn’t, go anywhere. You got used to being here alone and having it all, so quickly, a part of you couldn’t imagine sharing this planet, and Kai, with anybody.
When you returned to bed, Kai was lying on his back and staring at the ceiling. His hand took your chin and turned your head to him.
“Where were you?”
“I had a bad dream”.
Kai was a pro in bad dreams. He had a black belt in going back to hell through his dreams. Agonizing, long, realistic nightmares plagued his head no matter how deep he shoved it under the blankets. He looked a little strict for someone who consoles another after a bad dream. You had your suspicions he had other things on his mind. Sometimes you would catch him observe you as if he was expecting you to run away.
LA1 by Moby segment
You were finishing the book. This was the book you’ve been meaning to read ever since you were fourteen. When everybody nailed it at school, you were busy with other more interesting stuff, and so, you never ended up reading it. Now was the epitome of everybody’s ‘one day’. People leave interesting tv shows, tedious chores, the best packs of cookies and postponed hobbies for that cryptic ‘one day’ but it never comes. Not for most people at least. Now, you two, more so you than Kai, finally faced this neverending time period to do everything procrastination took away from you. You finally were finishing that damn book.
As you laid there at the pool of your new house, and the sun was sending blinding specks jumping off the water, Kai was drawing complicated shapes on the side of your leg and looking down the valley of Los Angeles, the city where he was king. Just like everywhere else.
“I think I have memorized every inch of you by now”, he said.
You swallowed down a sigh, because you were about fourteen pages away from the end. You knew when Kai started talking, there would be nothing else but talking for at least fifty minutes.
“Good, now, if I get into a horrible car crash and get terribly disfigured you will recognize my body one way or another”, you replied, trying to at least finish the page. Kai’s hand laid on the paper, pulling it away.
“Once we get out”, you smiled.
“If we get out”, he corrected you.
You let go of the book he was pulling away. He didn’t like sharing you.
“You think... we’ll be here long?”
“The spell is all we have, and it’s useless”, he shrugged like he didn’t care. “There’s nothing else. The ascendant is out there, and we don’t have a Bennet here to cut her...”
“Do these things have expiration date?” you asked, worried, “is it possible that one day, this prison will collapse and disappear?”
He looked at you, his hand caressing your knee absently.
“No, I don’t think so. It’s awesome here though, isn’t it? You like it, right?”
“Of course I do”, you nodded, without giving it too much thought. You looked down to the city where Kai’s gaze has been wandering earlier. “I’m still waiting for the horror to kick in, but it doesn’t. Either I’m too jaded to care, or...”
You bit your lip hard, thinking, whether you’re willing to spoil him. Parker’s palm squeezed your skin lightly. His hands were always warm, and he never refused to tickle you. He was a perfect guy to live with in a prison world: impossible to exhaust, handsy and resourceful. He could stay in one place for weeks, or drive through several states in one day. He knew every part of this magical planet and never felt lost anymore. It was bittersweet how this luxury of traveling without any discomfort came after eighteen years of him agonizing here alone.
He looked good with the hills of Los Angeles on the background, serving as colorful addition to him. His dark hair, and gun-like eyes, his demeanor of rich cynical kid who’s going to do you on the kitchen counter and never call again - only, Kai was following you everywhere.
“Or?” he took you out of your pondering. He didn’t like that either, when you drifted off in the middle of conversation. What are you thinking about? Who are you thinking about, Y/N? His tone of voice always said, I took you as far as an enchanted prison world so that you can’t see other guys, and you still have your head in the clouds.
“The feeling of having everything you need in your arms is intoxicating”, you sighed. The fundemental sensation of being completely satisfied with your life, while being in a literal prison world, came from the realization. Kai Parker was the final point of whatever path you’ve been striding. You weren’t one for professing your love passionately, or expressing it many times. But this one time you felt like you needed to get it off your chest.
“You ever had that?”
He blinked.
“Do you want to stay here, or do you want to move on? You wanted to see Fontana, right?” he asked, a bit lost, and he sounded like his mouth was dry. You took your book back from him.
“Pomona first”.
That night there was vivid change in Kai; instead of pounding you into the bed, like he usually did, as you both enjoyed it, he laid low, pressing you into the matrass with all his body. You felt almost like suffocating on the long, stretching feeling he was drilling into you with passionate, deep movements. For the first time you felt what it was like when you’re trying to jump out of your own skin with pleasure, after all the crying and moaning is just not enough.
“Wait for me, baby”, he was whispering, as you two moved together, hips to hips, shoulders to shoulders, and you thought your eyes will pop out, that maybe your nails are already halfway inside his shoulder blades. Kai was changing; he has been for some time now. He was becoming calmer and happier, and now, as he was making you come and told you to hold on at the same time, for a second there you could see him, shed of all his layers. The Kai Parker he would’ve been many years before, many tortures and catastrophes, and murders ago. The magic, devilish temptation, malevolence, misery and memories aside, there he finally was, a person who was begging you not to come without him, because even that, he didn’t want to do alone. As you clutched the hair on the back of his head, soft, just slightly curly, you felt your body fill with love, that kind that never really lets go of you. Because you finally saw the last manifestation of him, the last entity that lived in him, and it needed you, and loved you.
Kai, too, was making love as opposed to your usual experimental mutual fucking. Both types brought you joy; after he collapsed on the pillow next to you, you knew he would never be the old Kai. You could feel it in your guts.
I’M ON FIRE by Bruce Springsteen segment
“I could take you literally anywhere, and you still choose America”.
You dragged your now big bag on the glistening asphalt, sweating in heat, and gave up, motioning towards it.
“Technically, Hawaii...”
“Technically, Hawaii is America”, he nodded, picking up your bag, “but I hear you”.
“The Pacific, Kai”.
“You know what I did when I was here?” he asked, for the thousandth time in nine months.
“Climbed the Everest”, you chanted, rolling your eyes.
“Climbed the Everest”, he noted proudly. It took about a week? for you to convince him you weren’t interested in dying forty-five times before you finally reach the top of the mountain. He clicked his tongue finally, saying there’s no adventure to you. That’s how you ended up jumping off the Grand Canyon. Dares always led you to some drastic decisions you later regretted.
You settled on the famous North Shore, where the ocean was blue and green, and the palm trees swayed every day... all the day. At three oh seven, it rained for eleven minutes, and then, a majestic double rainbow stood above Oahu. The evening was so beautiful you felt you wouldn’t get tired of it in a hundred years. It’s really hard to get tired of hawaiian sunsets. Everything was perfect.
Until your phone rang.
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When you were clutching on Kai, your belly bag was on you, together with all essential things in the world of the twenty-first century. You had your phone in there, the charger in case of anything, car keys, wallet, pack of plasters and some gum. It all traveled with you into the world of ‘94, and that’s how you listened to music from the future in the world of the past. The charger was especially useful, because you could keep your phone turned on and took pictures. Literally everything you did resembled a young couple’s honeymoon. You were forced to delete everything from your phone though, so that it could contain all the photos from different places. You even joked that, once you run out of space completely, it’ll be time to go home.
Another once we get out moment.
Now, your phone, that survived here for nine months because you were charging it regularly, rang, and you didn’t even pay attention at first. It hasn’t rung before. This thing is not supposed to ring, it’s supposed to play music and take pictures of Kai as he is being adorable, sleeping in his king-sized bed, his head buried in the pillow.
You stood like a dummy in the middle of the parking lot, waiting for him to bring the bags to the car. And the phone was ringing.
What is this noise? you thought. Then your hand slipped into your pocket, and your heart got confused as to whether to sink or to leap. Your brain got squeezed inside your skull. Rage, and relief, and worry filled you. You knew so many things at the same time. Suddenly you knew you missed home like crazy. You missed leaving the house and seeing dumb people around. You missed not being a spoiled brat living in the houses that didn’t belong to you. Missed the traffic on the streets, and you missed animals and birds. In this world, there weren’t so much as spiders, crawling around and creeping you out. Not a mosquito, not a lousy worm. No sharks in the ocean, no swallows in the skies.
Also, you knew you’d kick Damon’s ass so hard he’s going to choke on his own kidneys. You recalled the moment you threw yourself in front of Kai, so full of yourself, and announced,
you wanna send him away again, you gotta send me with him
and Damon looked at you with his ever exhausted silver eyes of a jaded cat, and said,
okay.
And sent you, the person he used to call a friend, into the prison world.
Also, you knew, somehow, that Kai will be unhappy about this. Many times that he asked you ‘you like it here, right?’ you felt he was now clinging on the very place he used to be horrified of. It was way more than your own ego, so you barely thought that it was you that changed his perception. You were secretly scared his mind will start telling him this condition of things is normal. That only two people in the world is normal. And he won’t want to leave once the chance comes. That all his once we get outs is just him playing along with you, while he knows, in the back of his mind, that you’re never getting out, and he doesn’t care if it drives you crazy.
You answered the phone and didn’t say anything. Damon was silent, too, for a second.
“Well”, he said finally, “how you lovin’ it?”
You found his cockiness inappropriate. Not like he has locked you in a closet with a bully and came round in fourteen minutes to check on you.
“What is it? Are you here?” you asked, you throat dry.
Kai left the supermarket and was about a hundred steps away. It was going to rain in half an hour.
“Yes, we decided to pick you up, so to say”, he replied shortly.
“You decided I have learnt my lesson? Decided I was now good to go home, that’s what you decided?” you asked, your voice bubbling inside your throat like a pillar of boiling air.
“Give it to me...” Elena’s voice was closing, and your lungs trembled. You have missed them all. Even the Salvatore douche. God how you missed others. You could see Kai slowed down. He had very good eyes, and he saw you were holding your hand to your ear. He was fifty steps away.
“Y/N, where are you? We came to get you back home. Listen, we never meant to...”
“Ask her about Parker”.
“Are you alright? Are you with him?”
“We’re not taking him with us!”
Your voice quivered.
“I’m fine”.
It came out less bitter than you meant; like you were about to cry, while in reality you were bursting with rage.
“Is he keeping you there? Or has he left you there alone?”
“What do you mean?”
The audacity of them. Left you alone. They’re the only ones who throw their friends into magical prison worlds, for nothing.
“Well, he has stolen the ascendant. We had to build a new one”.
“What are you talking about? Kai doesn’t have the ascendant”.
There was silence. Through the flapping hot hawaiian air, you could see Kai with the paper bags walking towards you.
“Yes, he does”, Elena chuckled sadly. “We thought he’d be out by now”.
“We only found one useless spell, Elena”, you growled, “how are we supposed to get out without Bonnie’s blood?”
“Oh my god”, you heard Damon mutter. The palm trees started swaying in front of you. You knew now yet another thing. You were just afraid to think it.
“Bonnie conjured that one without blood. We didn’t have much time, Y/N. It was just the spell, and the ascendant. You’re saying he found it? Why hasn’t he got out then?”
All your guts sank down there together with your mind. At the same time, there was nothing to be shocked about. The signs were all there. You never even showed interest enough for him to share about the ritual of traveling between the worlds.
“That fucking liar was keeping me here”.
“Y/N, where are you?” Elena was almost yelling now.
“Tell her to go back”.
“Is he abusing you?”
Your face got distorted with anger and bitterness at the same time; you could feel you’re grimacing at him, as the musles in your face and neck went tense.
A gust of wind slapped you in the face, and the phone slipped out of your hand. The invisible pull was so sudden you were grabbed, too, and nearly fell on your face, as the clutch pulled on your hand a little.
“Kai!”
The phone shot through the air, right into his hand, and fifteen steps away, you could see he was furious already. The temper of this guy.
He hopped through the air. Your head was ringing with the echoes of their voices.
Kai couldn’t wait to walk another couple of meters, so he just leaped to you using magic. Perhaps he also did it to startle you more; as he reemerged next to you, his hand laid on your throat, and not the usual possessive sensual way, but ‘i’m about to squeeze the life out of you’ way this time. Your head bumped on the side of the car. The only reason he didn’t smash the phone on the ground was probaby the amount of fantastic pics it held.
“What did he say?” Kai growled.
If you could talk, or breathe, you’d say he’s a dick. You fought him, the anger giving you strength, your fists hitting him into the chest and stomach.
“Is he coming for you?”
Kai was screaming, and you have never seen him like that. For a moment there it felt like the old Parker, the miserable, uncontrollable, lightning throwing witch was back in his skin again, and you couldn’t take it to fix him all over again.
Your hands grabbed on his forearm as you kicked him in the shin as hard as you could. Kai yelled, letting you go, and you could finally breathe.
“Dick”, you scolded, “you dick”.
Your voice was hoarse. He didn’t hear you. Kai was suddenly full of demonic fear and fury, and the noise; he barely felt pain which let go of him in a second.
“You’ve been lying to me?!”
“You’re not going anywhere”, he said, his voice quivering with how much he contained inside. All the acid lava sleeping in the depths of his being, frozen by the comfort of not being disturbed, like he was locked away in a mental institution, now rose again and illuminated his skin from the inside.
“You’re lying to me!”
Too bad you lost it, too. Kai might have become a little like you; but you have become a little like him, too.
“You said there was no way out! While you had the ascendant all along? From day one!”
“You said you liked it here!”
You charged at him, your fist up, and he blocked it easily, hitting you in the stomach.
So, he beats girls, too!
He was never good at seeing the kick coming. God knows why, if you wanted to defeat Kai Parker, you just kicked him with one of your legs. He never sees it coming. The fight exhausted both of you as you screamed atrocities at each other. You knew you were just letting the frustration out; that kind that floods over you when you realize you’ve been wasting months in the prison world while you had all the means of getting out that whole time.
Kai, however, was fueled by something more sinister than that.
You never really meant to hurt him. Just punch him in the teeth for being a proper dick. He knew he was doing wrong, otherwise he wouldn’t be asking this ‘you like it here, right?’ like a broken record all the time.
And like a fool, you always replied, yes, because it was truth.
He now believed you’ve been lying to him, too, like a scared cat that was suddenly brought in at the vet clinic and the doctor was clicking the long metal scissors in front of him. He felt betrayed. He thought you’re dreaming of getting out and see your friends again.
“I am not enough for you! You have the whole world! And me! So what, you meant something else when you said that I am everything you need?” he yelled. Almost at the top of his lungs. The clouds were meanwhile gathering above Manoa, to release the rain in ten minutes.
“I meant it!”
“Then why do you need to leave?!”
“Not me - us!”
“We are not going anywhere! You’re staying here, with me!”
“No, you listen to me, Parker, we’re going back there, together, just like we arrived here! This”, you pointed your finger at the wretched sky where even the rain was on schedule, “is not real”.
As soon as those words left your mouth, you knew he’d misinterpret them.
His mouth moved like he was about to tear down his own face and bit yours off with the bloodied teeth of a skeleton. You could feel your lower lip swell. Blood was dripping down your chin because of how hard you fell on your face after he threw you away with his witchy move. You were about to break his jaw completely, and it was his own doing. If he hadn’t wanted you to become a fighter, he shouldn’t have taught you.
Your right fist was shaking with pain. It felt like you shattered your knuckles completely beating on his stupid head. Nothing in the world could set it right.
“What did you say?”
You felt mortally tired. It felt like when you stood on the edge of the Canyon, like when you were about to fall.
“Kai, this world is fiction. We need to go back out there...”
“It doesn’t work out there!”
“It will”.
He panted. He spat the blood on the ground, and you felt like you wanted to stop fighting and start making out.
The paper bags were scattered all around the car, one lonely banana forgotten under the blazing sun.
“I will fucking kill you for lying to me”, you sighed.
“I thought you loved me”, Kai responded, his voice dead, and your heart shuddered.
“I fucking do!” you roared.
“Then why do you...”
and that, all over again.
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knickynoo · 4 years
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BTTF Headcanons
As suggested by the wonderful @tsukinikawatteus, I’ve put together some of my headcanons. Honestly, these are going to revolve solely around Doc & Marty, because I don’t really have any developed ones involving other characters.
I’ll hide it under a ‘read more ’ in case it gets too long and ramble-y. Which it will, because this is me we’re talking about.
First, I’ll answer the ones I got in the ask.
- How Doc & Marty met: For this one, I just go by the official Bob Gale answer that Marty was 13 or 14, had heard rumors about the crazy old scientist in town, & snuck into Doc’s lab one day & got caught. The comic series actually shows this event happening, but I tend to dismiss that version because honestly, I don’t like the way it’s handled. (Plus Bob Gale has said that the comics/game/etc can be take it or leave it as considered canon, so yay) Anyway, I imagine a young Marty hearing all these whispers around town about Doc and being curious. Maybe he was looking for danger/adventure in going to investigate, but I also like to think that part of Marty felt sorry for this guy who everyone seemed to look down on. So he made his way over to Doc’s lab to see what the deal was & was initially scared when he got caught. But he saw all the cool experiments and the general chaos & was totally into it.  (And btw, in my headcanon, Marty is the one who first refers to him as Doc & establishes it as his “name,” unlike the comic version where Doc tells Marty to call him that?? Def didn’t like that part.)
- When they started to consider each other best friends/what impact did they have on each other’s life: I’d say they considered the other a best friend pretty quickly. Doc was absolutely thrilled to discover that this kid thought he was awesome & was so interested in his work. After spending so much of his life without true connections or relationships, having Marty around really changed Doc’s life. He finally had someone (aside from Einstein) to talk to about all of his experiments and the science behind them.
The same goes for Marty considering Doc a best friend. Seeing as he was growing up in such a dysfunctional environment, with parents who probably weren’t super attentive or close to him, he loved being around Doc. Not only was he treated as an equal, he also had someone to listen to him, which he didn’t get at home. He found encouragement and felt respected around Doc. Plus, my general headcanon is that Marty really doesn’t have other friends & was always kind of an outsider.
Now onto some of my other headcanons....
- As I mentioned above, I don’t see Marty as a guy with many friends. He’s friendly towards a lot of people, but doesn’t have a specific group he belongs to. He really only interacts with his band mates while he’s at practice & it’s more of a business situation than a friendship. Marty gets to practice, runs the show (playing sick guitar riffs) & then just leaves. His band mates serve as a convenient cover story for when he wants to go somewhere with Jennifer, but that’s pretty much it. He has three friends, ok? And one of them is an animal.
- Upon finally settling into the improved ‘85 timeline, once all the time-traveling was over, things were understandably very jarring to Marty. One of the things he found hardest to adjust to was the sudden affection from his parents, namely the good morning hugs & kisses like we see Lorraine give him at the end of the first movie. Marty was previously used to spending the mornings in solitude since his father would already be at work & his mom would sleep in (often because she was still out of it from drinking the night before). The idea of family breakfasts & being greeted so warmly when he woke up, and when he got home from school, was super weird to him at first.
- Marty has ADHD. (this seems to be a very common headcanon, lol). Doc, being the kind of guy who’s interested in a wide variety of topics, came across some research & information on it at some point & instantly recognized the signs in his friend. When Marty came over one day, frustrated after a particularly rough day at school, he sat him down & talked to him about his suspicions. And since Doc was well aware of the lack of potential support (because this is the 80s after all, & SO many people with ADHD just didn’t have resources to get help), he took on the role of giving Marty advice and tips on how he could cope with it.
- Related to above point: Marty found that wearing layers helped keep him calm/feel grounded, hence why our boy rocks the t-shirt/button up/jean jacket/puffy vest look. And honestly, the suspenders might play a role in that too, since they put subtle pressure on part of the chest/shoulders/back. This also explains the leather jacket from part II! Aside from just thinking it looked awesome (and perfectly inconspicuous), Marty liked that it was a thick, weighted material.
-Doc is autistic. As he was diving into the world of research concerning ADHD & other various conditions, he came across a series of studies on Asperger’s syndrome & instantly connected the information with his own childhood and current life. Since he grew up feeling isolated from his peers & like nobody understood him, reading through the studies made him feel like he had found an answer. (A fact nobody asked for: the first study printed in English on Asperger’s syndrome was released in 1981. Yes, I checked to make sure this headcanon would be possible.)
-Doc set up a bed for Marty in the garage partially for the nights they were working late & his friend was too tired to head home, but also because he realized that a lot of the time, Marty simply didn’t want to be at home. Marty got into the habit of sleeping in his clothes so that at any given moment he could head over to Doc’s garage if he needed to. Doc made it clear to him that he was welcome anytime & doesn’t bat an eye when the boy wanders in at night & flops down into the bed.
-For Doc’s birthday, Marty went out & bought him the most colorful, “loudest” Hawaiian shirt he could find. It was sort of a joke, but Doc absolutely loved it.
-On Marty’s birthday, Doc asked him to come over under the guise of needing help with an experiment, but it was really a mini party with the lab decorated with streamers & balloons & cupcakes Doc had gone to pick up. Einstein wore a party hat. 
- We all know Doc & Marty eat a lot of Burger King. When they eat it in Doc’s garage, Marty takes pieces of the fries and slips them under the table to Einstein. Doc does not appreciate Marty encouraging Einstein’s begging but the boy can’t resist sharing with the dog.
- Occasionally, when they’re taking a break from working or are just hanging out, Marty takes out his guitar & Doc takes out his saxophone & they jam. Sometimes they play actual songs & other times they create their own. Whenever they try to make up lyrics, it quickly devolves into complete nonsense, usually ending up with the two of them laughing so hard that they can’t even play anymore.
-Marty also sometimes puts on a Huey Lewis tape while the two of them are working. Doc initially wasn’t really into the music, but he eventually found himself singing along to the songs with Marty. 
Okay, I need to stop myself because. Wow. If anyone actually reads this thing, I commend you on the effort. Kai, you had no idea what you were unleashing when you sent me that ask the other day.
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blackcloverdatabase · 4 years
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English Translation of Novel 1: Chapter 3 – Your Dream Will Come True (Part 1 of 2)
With novels 2 and 3 finished, I can finally move on to translating the two chapters from novel 1 that were never animated. This one features Yami and Magna teaching at a magic academy at the border of the Common Realm. Fuegoleon also makes an appearance in this chapter (finally!).
Also, I’m saying this in advance so that you all aren’t as confused as I was when I was reading this, but, in this chapter, Magna is purposefully talking differently than how he usually talks. In the Japanese version, he’s slurring virtually every syllable, like a parody of antiquated delinquent speak. I wasn’t really sure how to convey that in English since there’s only so much slurring you can do, so please make do with the occasional slurred words and tepidly gangsta phrases I had him say in an attempt to mimic that.
--- Your Dream Will Come True (Part 1) ---
The Noble and Common Realms are dotted with educational institutions known as magic academies. They are primarily targeted toward young boys and girls who haven’t yet received their grimoires, offering a variety of information related to magic and the chance to hone one’s skills.
However, not all schools are created equal. Schools situated in the Noble Realm have all the equipment and staff they could want, but the further a school is from the Noble Realm, the more likely that it does not have the resources it needs. This may sound ruthless, but in this world where magic rules all, this was simply a fact of life. Schools near the Noble Realm got what they needed, and schools that were not had to improvise. That was the rationale used to maintain this nation’s schools.  
“Uhh, b-before class starts today, there is something I must tell you all.”
This particular school was situated in the town of Ryakke, a town at the northernmost tip of the Common Realm. If one moved just one more degree north, they would find themselves in the Forsaken Realm. The town could almost be considered the boundary between the Common and Forbidden Realms, but, even so, it had a magic academy. Based on the rationale described earlier, this school would be the last to get what it needs, however……
“…….That is, a Magic Knight will be coming today as a guest lecturer.”
“!!”
Currently, the students were in homeroom for the morning. Their homeroom teacher was a young man named Harris. Hearing such great news so suddenly, the classroom erupted with chatter. It was quite rare that anyone would bother to come lecture at a magic academy as far away as this. The fact that this guest lecturer was a Magic Knight, a member of such a heroic troop, was icing on the cake.
The Magic Knights are an army of mages under the direct control of the Wizard King. They are an autonomous organization within Clover Kingdom, the kingdom’s cornerstone of defense, and the heroes whom the nation’s citizens both honor and envy. They were an elevated existence that the students could never hope to reach.
“Wow! Do you think it’s the leader of the Golden Dawn, Captain William Vangeance!?”
“No way! There’s no way somebody as awesome as him would come to a place like this!”
“But if Elude says it, then maybe it’s true!”
One child who could be considered the leader of the class, Elude, and two of his followers spoke up. This caused the others in the classroom to follow suit.
“What’ll I do if it’s the Captain of the Silver Eagles, Nozel-sama!”
“I know, right!? I’ve heard that he’s super hot!”
“If we’re gonna have a captain come teach us, then I want it to be the Captain of the Blue Roses - Captain Charlotte!”
“No way! Captain Fuegoleon of the Crimson Lions would be the best!”
Even though they lived in a remote area, they heard plenty of rumors about the more famous Magic Knights. Students at the tender ages of twelve and thirteen shared the names of the knights they admired, making the classroom quite boisterous.
“……Now then, please come in.”
In all that commotion, Harris slightly raised his voice and called out to someone outside the classroom. Why was he avoiding their questions? For the moment, the students ignored such doubts and focused their eyes and hopes towards the classroom entrance.
BAM!!
The wooden door to the classroom was kicked open as a young man with slicked back silver and black hair waltzed in.
“Yo!”
The man walked with an exaggerated swagger as he headed toward the front of the blackboard. His fierce-looking sunglasses glinted with a spark before,
SLAM!!
he slammed his hand against the podium.
“I’m your guest lecturer, Magna Swing! I’ll be working ya punks to the bone today, so pleased to meet ya!!”
“………..”
‘…….This dude’s crazy!’ The whole class was petrified by him for a few moments, but once they came to, this is what they all thought. Harris told them that a Magic Knight would be coming, but the person before them was…….
“Hey!! Ya punks have some nerve ignoring me!!”
…….A delinquent. Moreover, he was a delinquent of the antiquated variety.
‘What the heck is going on here…….?’
“Magna. Don’t go yellin’ at them so suddenly. You’re always overdoin’ everything.”
As the class became more and more confused, they heard another voice come from the entrance to the classroom.
“Plus, when you act like that, that makes me look nuts, too.”
“Yessir! Gotchu, boss!!”
A man steeped down to enter through the classroom door as Magna greeted him with a deep bow. The expressions of every student in the classroom froze once more when they saw him. This man looked dangerous in all sorts of ways. He was at least 180 cm tall, his body was overflowing with muscles, and his neck was impossibly thick. Right above all that was the face of a killer. If the young man who walked in earlier was a delinquent, then this man was one of the dons of the underworld who leads young thugs like that. That was the kind of atmosphere this giant of a man had. Faced with such a man, all the students could only stare at their knees silently as a cold sweat dripped down their faces.
“Sheesh. Think about how you’re goin’ to trouble others before you act. I’m a Virgo*, you know?”
Without a care for how this will trouble the others in the room, Yami lit a cigarette and stood at the podium with such an intimidating air that it would make any young girl runaway in tears. Even though they lived in a remote area, they heard plenty of rumors about the more famous Magic Knights. They mostly heard about Magic Knights with a brilliant track record, such as the ones they mentioned earlier. However, naturally, they heard negative rumors, too. The majority of those negative rumors centered around one squad. The name of that squad was……
“Hey. I’m the Captain of the Black Bulls, Yami Sukehiro.”
Yes, that very squad. The image the students had of the Magic Knights was about to change completely.
Yami Sukehiro and Magna Swing. Amongst all the Magic Knights – no, even amongst the Black Bulls – those two were famous for having murderous-looking faces, so why were they here as guest lecturers? The reason can be gleaned by going back to a conversation that occurred just a few hours ago.
 “……You want us to teach at some magic academy in the Common Realm for a day?”
After Yami gave Asta, Noelle, and Luck their dungeon capturing mission, a certain visitor suddenly dropped by the hideout. Yami sat on a couch in the base’s common area as he dealt with that visitor.
“Yes. The Wizard King ordered Leo and I directly.”
That visitor was the Captain of the Crimson Lions, Fuegoleon Vermillion. Fuegoleon brought liquor and confectionaries as souvenirs and sat on a sofa across from Yami as they talked.
“Woah. That’s great. So you’re switchin’ jobs, huh? Switchin’ from bein’ a super zealous king of seriousness to a super zealous teacher of seriousness? Sounds good. Suits your character, too. It’s actually scary how well that suits you. You should get one of those jerseys P.E. teachers wear.”
“I don’t know what you’re trying to say about me, but……. Anyway, it’s a great chance to interact with the innocent children of this country. I was looking forward to it, but……”
In contrast to Yami, who was in a great mood thanks to the liquor Fuegoleon brought, Fuegoleon himself looked sullen.
“Today, I was given a different, more urgent mission. Both Leo and I must go.”
Then, he began smiling triumphantly as he continued,
“So rejoice, Yami! The Wizard King has decided that you and one of your squad members will go in my and Leo’s place! Please go right now!”
In a move rather uncharacteristic of him, Yami spat out his drink.
“What are you sayin’!? That doesn’t make me happy at all!”
“Why not!? This is a valuable opportunity to set an example for the young three leaf clovers that will carry the future of this country! I would love to postpone today’s mission to go, but since I cannot, I decided to tearfully pass on that duty to you!”
“Thanks, but no thanks! I can’t believe you’d grant me such an unwelcome favor all smiley like that! That pisses me off!”  
The fact this super zealous king of seriousness can drop such a task on him in pure, heartfelt sincerity and not out of spite was one of the things Yami dreaded most about him.
“Actually, aren’t you pickin’ the wrong guy for this? These kids are gonna be taught by the worst squad in the Magic Knights, you know?”
“There are no other Captains who are free at the moment.”
“But this mission’s just to serve as a guest lecturer, so is it really necessary to send a Captain-class knight?”
“The higher one stands, the further one is separated from the point of view of the masses. I believe that it is our duty as Captains to throw ourselves into their daily lives and hear their voices.”
Yami thought that, if a guy like this was at the top of the Magic Knights, it would surely be really easy for him to motivate the other knights. However, he would rather be spared of this guy’s fiery spark spreading to other squads.
“……Truthfully, there is another reason why a Captain-class must do this.”
“…………?”
The details that followed certainly made it difficult for Yami to refuse.
“……Well, if that’s how it is, then I guess you would need a Captain-class to do this.”
“That’s right. So, are you interested in taking on this mission?”
“……Well, this was ordered by the Wizard King, so I can’t exactly refuse.”
‘Since it’s him we’re talking about, he probably ordered this while imagining how this conversation between me and Fuegoleon was gonna go with a huge grin on his face. That pisses me off.’
“Don’t look so malcontent! After all, even if all the other captains were available, I still would have recommended you for the job!”
“Hearing that just makes me even more unhappy.”
He snidely replied, but Fuegoleon was undaunted.
“I’ve always felt that you had a knack for teaching! Although you’re complaining right now, I sincerely believe that you will succeed!”
 And so, our story returns to the classroom.
“……U-um, Yami…….. sensei?”
In this classroom dominated by silence, Harris-sensei spoke up with fear in his voice.
“Hm?”
He spoke up because, after Yami introduced himself, he wrote “Study Hall” on the blackboard and then flumped onto the teacher’s chair. Magna stood beside him resting a bat of flames he pulled out of nowhere, his Grand Slam, against his shoulder. It was as if he was trying to assert his dominance over the rest of the class. They truly did look like a gangster boss and his young subordinate.
“Um…… will you be starting class soon?”
With that, Yami turned his head toward the blackboard before giving Harris a frightening look.
“…….Study hall is a valid class, isn’t it?”
“Well, yes, but……. Since we have a Magic Knight Captain here, that’s such a special occasion, so we were hoping to hear all sorts of interesting things from you……”
“Huuh!? You bastard! You sayin’ you have a problem with how Yami-san’s runnin’ this class!?”
“EEEK!?”
Magna struck the floor with his bat, causing Harris to reflexively raise his hands to protect his face.
“Listen up, punk! If Yami says it’s white, then it’s white, even if it’s black! If Yami tells ya to eat somethin’, ya eat it like it’s the best damn thing you’ve ever tasted, even if it’s an Amazonian Dung Beetle! Startin’ today, these are the rules of this classroom, capisce!?”
“Like I said, its because you yell so stupidly loud that you make me look scary, too. How do you plan on payin’ up for this, huh? And wait, you’ve eaten a dung beetle? Seriously?”
Yami grabbed Magna’s head and easily lifted him off the ground with one hand. There were many things that the students, particularly Elude, wanted to say, but, at the very least, they knew that normal people don’t threaten to extort money from others like that.  
“Your name was Harris-sensei, right?”
Yami threw Magna into a corner of the classroom and gave Harris a piercing, murderous glare.
“Huh!? Um, yes! I’m sorry! I’ll do anything, so please spare me……!”
‘Oh no, he’s going to break Harris-sensei’s head next!’ the students thought. Internally, they all prayed for his soul.
“I guess you’re right. My bad. This is the first time I’ve ever taught a classroom, so I don’t really get what I’m supposed to be doin’. I see. Let’s try this, then.”
Shockingly, Yami listened to Harris’s request without objection and made Magna erase the words “Study Hall” from the blackboard.
“So, anyone got any questions for me?”
He reclined against his chair once more, but, this time, he looked as if he was actually interested in teaching them, making the other students exchange glances with each other.
‘Well, just because he has a rough looking face, that doesn’t make him a bad person. He hasn’t threatened any of us. He has only been strict toward Magna, but maybe that was just to protect Harris-sensei. He’s definitely dangerous, but maybe he’s nice on the inside,’ Elude thought.
Everyone else thought so, too. As the leader of the class, Elude quietly raised his hand and asked,
“……U-umm, what do Magic Knights usually do?”
In response, Yami smiled gently and said,
“…….Hm. Good question. Well, we beat up bad guys, beat up more bad guys, then beat up more bad guys………. Yeah. That’s pretty much what we do.”
……Even though he was motivated enough to start class, he wasn’t motivated enough to do much more than that.  
“Excuse me! What was the most difficult mission you’ve ever been on!?”
“…….Could you teach us magic?”
“You’ve met the Wizard King, right!? What kind of person is he!?”
He may not have been very motivated, but the fact he was willing to answer their questions was more than enough for them to all raise their hands and start asking. After all, it was rare for a Magic Knight to come all the way here. Even if it’s the Captain of the infamous Black Bulls and some young upstart, that wasn’t enough to damper the students’ curiosity.
Yami watched the whole spectacle with a smile. It wasn’t obvious when he was disciplining Magna earlier, but maybe he actually really likes kids…….
“Ha ha! This is more of a pain in the ass than I thought! Magna, switch places with me.”
……Or maybe he doesn’t.
“Yessir! I gotchu!”
‘I can hardly understand what this guy’s saying!?’ the students thought. For the second time that day, the atmosphere in the classroom froze over. Yami was dangerous, but he at least listened to them. Magna was a dangerous person who didn’t make a lick of sense when he talked. All the excitement the students felt just moments ago evaporated in an instant.
“……Also, you can talk normally now. I’ve more or less figured it out.”
“Huh, really?”
“Yeah, pretty sure, anyway.”
“…….Got it.”
After talking with Yami, Magna’s face relaxed, looking much less dangerous than before.
“Sorry about that everyone! The truth is that I just came back from a mission that made enemies and allies alike a bloody mess, so I was a bit on edge there!”
‘Hearing that doesn’t make us any less scared of you!’ Elude thought to himself. That said, Magna had an unexpectedly charming smile on his face as he stood at the podium.
“So, what was it that you wanted to know? Our most dangerous mission so far? Let me think. I don’t know if it was the most dangerous, but for that bloody mission I mentioned earlier, I brought two newbies with me to the village of Saussy!”
‘…….Huh?’
From that point onward, Magna forthrightly answered each and every question the students asked. Faced with such a sudden change, though the students were frightened of him at first, they slowly but surely began to smile. There were a few students who were creeped out by the sudden change, but….
“Wait, Magna. Your personality right now compared to how you were when you came here is way too different. It’s creepy. Talk about scary. Are you mentally unstable?”
“How mean! You’re the one who told me to do that!”
“Hm? Do you have a problem with me?”
“No, we cool! It was my bad! I goofed!”
“….Magna-sensei, what are you saying?”
“Isn’t that obvious!? ‘No problem at all! Thank you for the feedback’ – of course! ”
“A ha ha, he’s a stereotypical delinquent, alright!”
As he interacted with the kids, the tension that once filled the classroom gradually eased. The dangerous atmosphere that surrounded Yami and Magna also disappeared. The students couldn’t help but wonder why the two were giving off such “We’re gonna sell you on the black market” vibes earlier. Such questions were buried under the fun conversations they were having right now, and first period ended before anyone realized it.
……Well, except for one.
It was now time for second period.
“Huff……. Hah…… haah…… huff……”
After establishing a bond with the rest of the classroom, the class went out to the school grounds behind the school at Yami’s suggestion.  
“……Wait…… are you kidding me? ……..This is impossible!”
The students were all dressed in sportswear……
“Hey, kid who just said this was impossible. Five more laps for you.”
…..And they were all being forced to run.
“What’s with this? What are you trying to do with us!?”
“I’ve never heard of having to run a marathon for class at a magic academy!”
Once Elude and his entourage spoke up, complaints started flying from the rest of the class. However, it was too scary to stand before Yami and voice their complaints to his face, so they opted to complain as they ran. In response, Yami looked at the students with dead looking eyes, and said,
“Didn’t one of you ask me to teach you some magic?  If you do this long enough, you’ll sort of feel like you learned somethin’. Like you were training or somethin’.”
“No! Magic! We were talking about magic! We never said a word about physical training!”
“Shut up. Don’t you know that a healthy spirit resides in…… yeah….. it resides in a healthy body.”
“All this is doing is making me dizzy!”
“Yami-sensei, please stop this! At this rate, the students are going to collapse!”
Reaching the end of his patience, Harris clung to Yami with tears in his eyes.
“You were running such a fun class just moments ago, so why are you doing this all of a sudden!?”
“I had to get them all to trust me first before getting them to do what I wanted. You should take notes.”
“That’s not how you run a classroom! That’s how you convince somebody to commit a crime! Please don’t abuse my students like that!”
“But look, there are some kids who are totally into this. Take that blonde girl with the glasses, for example.”
With cigarette in hand, he pointed to a young girl who was running at a steady pace. If he remembered correctly, she was the one who asked him to teach them magic. He couldn’t really remember, but it was probably her.
“Ah, that’s Allison. She’s the top student in this class…… no, in this school.”
Harris also watched Allison, sounding a little proud as he spoke,
“She only just recently entered this academy, but she always earns the highest grades in the class, and she’s also very skilled at handling her magic. She’s a little uncooperative, which is a shame, but she’s an excellent student.”
“……Is that so?”
‘……If she’s such a great student, why did she enroll in a Magic Academy all the way out here in the sticks?’
“Anyway, please stop this! The students really will collapse if this goes on!”
“Huh!? Ya bastard! You really like questioning the way the boss does things, don’t ya!?”
“Eeek!!”
‘Harris-sensei is such a wimp,’ the students thought at they watched Harris squat down, shielding his head with his face between his knees in response to Magna’s threats. In the meantime, Yami looked like he was deep in thought.
“Well, you have a point. It would be troublesome if they collapsed……. After all, the fun part starts now.”
Yami said ominously before signaling the students to stop.
“Understood. Then, let’s start a little game. All of you go and form pairs with somebody you get along with.”
He said as he pointed at them. They all did as they were told and formed pairs while they caught their breaths. After confirming that they all formed pairs, Yami breathed a puff of smoke before telling them,
“Alright. Now, fight each other to the death.”
“HUUUH!?”
Elude and the other students exclaimed. They all knew something bad was coming, but they weren’t expecting a death game.
“……Don’t “Huh!?” me…….. What, you don’t want to have a death match?”  
“Of course we don’t! Why would you ever think we wanted to!?”
“Well, you were all saying you didn’t want to run anymore, so……”
“So you thought we’d rather kill each other!? How emotionally unstable are you!?”
“Huh!? Yami-san goes out of his way to heed your concerns and this is how you repay him, ya ungrateful brats!?”
‘That delinquent is so annoying!!’
The students were starting to get angry, but Yami said as if to calm them down,
“I mean, I said death match, but obviously I didn’t actually mean that you should kill each other. That would be bad.”
The students wanted to scream “Well obviously!”
“However, you should go at it seriously, as if it were a death match. It would be beneficial for everyone to have some serious, harder combat training.”
‘……..Well, he has a point there.’
These students were all aiming for jobs far away from the battlefield, but the school curriculum still included combat training. If enriching that aspect of their education is what he was aiming for, then they had no complaints……
Elude was just about to accept this lesson, but at that moment,
“Moreover, this combat training is going to be special.”
Once Yami exchanged looks with Magna, he created a large number of fireballs and did a few practice swings with the bat he was carrying on his shoulder.
“If anybody tries to skimp out on training, Magna here will enter the battle and educate you personally, so be grateful.”
“………”
As the students stood watching Magna with eyes full of terror, Magna grabbed one of his fireballs,
“C’mon and start already, brats!”
“U-uwaaaaaaaaaaah!!”
With that, their second period class began with the most rigid training session they ever had as fireballs flew through the sky. It was a training session where they absolutely were not allowed to cut corners.
 “So, with this, now you know that human beings are surprisingly tough. None of you will die that easily.”
The schoolgrounds was littered with burnt patches here and there. Some of them were still smoldering.
After being forced to do all-out combat training until the end of the class period, the students were all collapsed upon the smoldering ground, where they laid as they listened to Yami talk. Of course, even if they could hear him speak, their minds weren’t in a state where they could process what he was saying.
“And so, from now on, I guess…… you should try pursuing anything in life with the same kind of seriousness. I think. Let’s end the lesson on that kind of message.”
“That was perfect! I’d expect no less from ya, boss!”
As Yami and Magna talked, a single girl approached them – Allison. She had handled the combat training with ease, a calm expression on her face through the entire ordeal. However, right now, she was glaring at Yami.
“For days, I was looking forward to being visited by a Magic Knight, but I’m disappointed in you. Please give us a proper lesson that only a Magic Knight could offer us.”
“HEY! What are you so pissed about, little girl!?”
‘…….She’s gonna die…….’
‘……Allison’s totally gonna die……’
‘…….. I was such a big fan of her, too……’
The other students muttered. Just as they expected, Magna swung his bat against the ground.
“HUH!? Are you tryna say that we aren’t proper Magic Knights!!?”
But then Yami iron clawed Magna’s head and lifted him from the ground before turning toward Allison once more.
“Your name was Allison, right? Then, can you give me an example of what kind of lesson you’d want?”
“What you were doing before would be sufficient. There are all sorts of questions I would love to ask you, such as the internal affairs of the Magic Knights and the kinds of characteristics different knights have.”
“Hmm, your questions sound oddly specific. Why?”
“Well…… no particular reason. At the very least, I think that would benefit all of us more than these random activities you’re having us do.”
She averted her eyes from Yami for a bit before meeting his eyes once more.
“I see. Well, you have a point. The next lesson can be like that, but before that……”
He looked around at all the other students, who were all worn out from training.
“All of you, go wash your faces or somethin’. You’re all filthy. Ha ha, wonder why?”
‘I’m gonna kill him!’ Elude thought, though he was sure that he wasn’t the only one thinking about this. There was no mistake that everyone was starting to feel an emotion other than fear toward this tyrannical Magic Knight Captain.
“Take a short break. After that, gather around here and we’ll resume class.”
After receiving their instructions, they dragged themselves to the drinking fountain. As much as they wanted to kill him, their fear of him hasn’t diminished in the slightest, so no student dared to oppose him.
“……By the way, Allison.”
Yami called out to Allison to stop her.
“The fact that a Magic Knight was visiting this school was supposed to be kept secret until earlier today.”
“……!”
Her short figure froze at his words.
“How come you knew we were coming?”
“It doesn’t matter, does it?”
As if to escape from Yami, she joined the rest of the students.  
 A few hours ago, at the Black Bulls’ base.
“There’s a spy from the Diamond Kingdom!?”
Hearing such a thing so suddenly from Yami, Magna nearly dropped the high-grade pudding Yami had given him earlier, which Yami had received as a gift from Fuegoleon. Incidentally, Magna had agreed to go with Yami as thanks for the pudding.
“And this Diamond Kingdom spy is……. hiding in Ryakke village’s magic academy?”
“Yeah, that’s the tip-off we received. That super zealous king of seriousness was supposed to go investigate that while teaching there for the day, but, in the end, it was decided that we would go instead.”
He said as he flumped against the sofa.
“Well, the truth is that there’s a number of their spies scattered around in various towns in various regions of the kingdom.”
“Really!?”
“Yeah. After all, Clover Kingdom’s doin’ it, too. We and any country we’re on unfriendly terms with mutually monitor each other from both inside and outside the country. We talk about how much we hate each other, but we can’t help but keep our eyes on each other…… like a bunch of teenagers or somethin’.”
“My apologies, Yami-san! I don’t understand half of what you just said! Graaaah, this is all because I’m stupid!”
“Uh, sorry, don’t take everything I say so seriously. You’re makin’ me feel embarrassed.”
Leaving that conversation aside, information gathering through spies, or even the intentional dissemination of information to another country was tantamount to an act of war.  
“However, if we tried to go after each and every one of those spies, we wouldn’t have enough people protectin’ the Royal Capital. That’s why Captain-class Magic Knights aren’t usually deployed to missions like this.”
“So, why do you have to go this time?”
“Because of the place they’re hidin’ at. It would be a pain if they end up bein’ a bad influence on the kids. Y’know, those “ young three leaf clovers that will carry the future of this country.””
“Oh! I get it! Can I use that phrase, too!?”
“No. I came up with it, so it’s mine.”
Yami imagined Fuegoleon making a face of disappointment for stealing his words, but he didn’t mind that and continued his explanation.
“Moreover, the educational institutions established in the remote areas of this country are more useful than you’d expect to this country. If that school had to close down because of some nasty rumors, the kids who went there would have to go to some far away school instead.”
Of course, the people who live in the outskirts of the Common Realm wouldn’t have the mana nor the money to attend a school in the more urban areas. Otherwise, they wouldn’t bother attending the school in Ryakke. If that school wasn’t there, an entire region’s kids would fall into a situation where they wouldn’t be able to get an education, no matter how much they wanted one.
“Also…… we’re still shaky on the details, but the truth is that, lately, people from the Diamond Kingdom have been inciting violence in various parts of the kingdom.”  
“Those guys again…… they really like invading our turf!”
“No, well….. it seems that their motive this time isn’t to invade us.”
They haven’t been attacking the villages or towns, and they haven’t been damaging the farm fields, either. They’ve merely been popping up in various places, leaving traces of battle behind. It was truly ominous.
“Well, the point is that we don’t know why they’ve been moving the way they have, so just to be safe, we’re gonna go check it out.”
“…….So, what do you think we should do?”
Magna asked. He didn’t care about the details of the mission, just what he should do. Rather than try to get a firm grasp on the events leading up to this situation, he just needed the gist of the story, one that would make the problem he needs to solve simple.
“Let’s see…… Thanks to Fuegoleon investigating for us, we have some idea on how to find the spy, but there’s still about one more thing we need to do.”
“I see! Then, let’s find them and beat the crap outta them!”
“You’re simplifying things a little too much there.  Fuegoleon’s plan was to probe for the spy while going through with the lesson.”
“Understood! Then, we’ll beat up anybody who looks suspicious while we’re teaching!”
“You don’t understand shit……. Well, still, it would be good if you go to class with that attitude. If the spy reads too much into what you’re doing, they might panic and slip up.”
“Got’chu! Like this!?”
“Perfect. I can hardly understand what you’re sayin’, though.”
Yami left Magna as he practiced speaking gangsta, thinking to himself,
‘The spy will probably feel shaken up when they see two Magic Knights suddenly appear. If we spook them enough, then they should slip up. It’s possible that they may already know that we’re coming, but that in itself would help us narrow down who the culprit is. If somebody knows of our visit when it was supposed to be kept secret, then that would be very suspect.’
However,
‘……This doesn’t seem like enough.’
Even if they do shake the spy up, would that be enough to reach them? There was no guarantee that they would slip up. To begin with, he wasn’t a big fan of strategies that involve standing by and watching.
Even if they can’t do something as extreme as what Magna was suggesting earlier, there must be something they can do to make this mission more fun……. Er, rather, a solution that will make everyone happy with the outcome.
‘……Well, I’ll come up with something as we go.’
As he weighed his thoughts, he pulled out the investigative report that Fuegoleon gave him earlier from his book pouch and flipped through it. The report contained information on several people who were suspected to be Diamond Kingdom spies, but……
‘……Is one of these cute little fellas really a spy?’
 --- Returning to the Magic Academy drinking fountain, after Yami’s second period lesson from hell ---
“You’re amazing, Allison-chan! I can’t believe you talked back at Yami-sensei like that!”
A young girl who Allison has almost never spoken to struck her shoulder as she said this, surprising her. If she remembered correctly, the young girl’s name was Sheila.
“W-what’s with you? Don’t just slap my shoulder like that. Don’t you have any common sense…..?”
“I-I’ve never been told that after slapping a classmate’s shoulder, but……”
She was a little put off by Allison’s odd retort, but Sheila continued to smile.
“Thanks to you, I’m sure even Yami-sensei will start teaching a proper lesson!”
“……I wonder about that.”
Two boys interceded into the conversation. Allison hadn’t talked to either of them much, either, but she was pretty sure that one of them was named Elude.
“That dude is an old geezer who’s okay with making fellow classmates fight to the death. Since you talked back to him, he might make us do something even weirder.”
“Right? We’re all exhausted already, so please don’t rile him up, okay?”
“I mean, trying so hard at some magic academy right on the border of the Forsaken Realm…… you must really be full of yourself, huh?”
Following Elude’s lead, the other boys who follow him put the blame on Allison. Sheila retaliated angrily,
“You’re wrong! Allison said all that for our sakes! Besides, all of you were complaining at Yami-sensei just a little while ago from the beginning!”
“We didn’t complain to his face. We’re telling her not to talk to him like she’s trying to start a fight. Unless, you plan on taking responsibility if something happens?”
Elude smiled maliciously as he said this, but she simply looked back at him with mild confusion.
“…….Huh? Ah, sorry. I was thinking about something else, so I didn’t hear you.”
“In a situation like this!?”
She was thinking about how this would-be bully and his stooges were just way too typical. Straight out of a textbook.
“More importantly, we’ll be scolded if we don’t return soon.”
“H-hey!”
Despite Elude’s pleas, she didn’t stop, boldly cutting her way through them.
“Don’t ignore us! What do you want, anyway!?”
One of Elude’s followers got angry with her attitude and tried to grab her thin arm, but……
“…….H-huh?”
He thought he grabbed her, but she moved out of his reach as smoothly as running water, causing him to stumble forward. Allison continued toward where Yami was, not stopping for even a moment.
“I’m different from all of you.”
 “Twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two…… Okay, looks like everyone’s here. Seriously? None of you ran away? But I thought of such an interesting punishment…...”
‘He’s not even trying to hide his true intentions!’ Elude thought angrily. Yami sat on the floor and put his hands on his knees as he looked around at everyone.
“Alright, for third period, I think I’ll hold a Q&A session as Allison suggested.”
Upon hearing this, everyone breathed a sigh of relief. Much like Sheila did earlier, a number of students looked at Allison thinking things like “Good job!” and “You’re a God!”. However…….
“And so….”
Yami took off his Magic Knight robe, and Magna struck his fist against his palm with a vicious expression on his face.
“Those of you with both questions and courage, come at me and Magna with all you got. If you can land a finishing blow on us, we’ll answer any questions you’ve got.”
“HUUH!?”
— To be continued in Part 2 —
*Note: The reason Yami mentions that he’s a Virgo is that “Virgo” is spelled with the kanji characters for “young lady” in Japanese. In other words, he’s of the “young lady” constellation, but he would probably scare away most young ladies.  I couldn’t think of a good way to localize the joke, so you’ll have to make do with an explanation.
I think Yami might have been hanging around Luck a bit too much if he’s coming up with ideas like having the class do a death match. His comment about countries spying on each other even though they insist that they hate each other like they’re a bunch of teenagers was great, though.  
The kids calling Yami an old geezer had me like “??” at first, but I guess he is twice their age.
This chapter compliments the Magna and Luck one quite well in the sense that it explores yet another aspect of Clover Kingdom’s rampant inequality.  It feels like chapters with Magna in it consistently emphasize Clover Kingdom’s social divides, even if it doesn’t have anything to do with him directly.
Anyway, Yami and Magna get more serious in the next half of the chapter.
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huntertales · 4 years
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Part One: Two Heads Are Better Than One. (Heaven Can’t Wait S09E06)
Episode Summary: When Dean gets a call from Castiel about a possible case dealing with spontaneous human combustion, the older Winchester decides to investigate--on his own. The reader decides to tag along. She doesn’t take no for an answer when Dean shares his odd hesitations on letting her work on a hunt with Castiel.  Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader Word Count: 4,518.
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“What am I exactly supposed to be looking at, again?” 
You tilted your head to the side and stared at the sheets of paper Kevin handed over to you to read over. He called you and the boys into the library this morning after claiming he had a breakthrough worth sharing. The kid had been working on translating the tablet for days now with almost no breaks at all. He was overly eager with what he claimed was some kind of monumental breakthrough. It was the first update he had in weeks. All of his supposed hard work came in the stack of papers you flipped through to discover it was nothing you were expecting. Pages upon pages filled with what you guessed were doodles and illegible chicken scratch Kevin called his handwriting. This was the progress he had to offer. It made much sense to all of you as the words etched into the stone.
You managed to read a few of Kevin’s notes that offered no clarity to the next step in his work, causing you to worry he didn’t make any real progress at all The boys weren’t happy either at the small ounce of hope Kevin had instilled you with his news. You flipped through all the notes to see if there might have been something useful, but it was all the same. Nonsense. You raised your brow in curiosity as to how this was supposed to help all of you. The demon tablet took months to translate just the trials, unfortunately you didn't have that luxury of time. You needed to undo what Metatron did quickly as possible.
"That's your 'big news',” Sam sounded the least bit enthusiastic at the promise turned into a let down at seeing the prophet's notes that were most likely going to turn out to be useless. “is that you translated the tablet into doodles?"
"It's cuneiform." Kevin tried to explain the long and tedious process of how he managed to get to this point. "I hit a wall translating the tablet into english. But I found an ancient codex linking the angel script to proto-elamite cuneiform, and I was able to translate the tablet and the footnotes into elamite, which is—"
“Doodles.” Dean finished the younger man’s sentence. 
“It’s extinct.” Kevin added.
“Well,” You let out a quiet sigh of annoyance from his news that all sounded to be turning out the same way. Bad and pointless to even still be talking about this. You glanced back to the doodles in some kind of attempt to make sense of it. You had an ear for languages. But even you found yourself drawing a blank for what the hell this could even mean. “Can you read it?”
“No one can.” He said. “Scholars have tried for centuries.” 
“So it’s a dead end?” You took a wild guess at what this meant for you. You threw the papers to the table in defeat at the continuous walls you kept hitting. It felt with each turn you took to try and get yourself out of this angel mess only turned out the same, time spent wasted and no progress to show for your effort. Kevin wasn’t defeated as you were. He thought there might be a way to keep going with this angle.
“Not quite.” Kevin said. You crossed your arms over your chest to hear what the kid had to say, hoping this conversation turned out to be worth your while. "Now, most proto-elamite is abstract, but I was able to decipher one phrase from Metatron's footnotes. 'Falling angels.'"
You and the boys exchanged a glance to one another at the set of keywords that had started this entire mess in the first place. Maybe you had been looking at this the wrong way. You thought the answer to your problems would be hidden somewhere in the tablet. Words God spoke himself might not have held the information you needed. You wondered if it was hidden somewhere between the lines. Somewhere most would simply ignore.
"Okay, so, the footnotes to Metatron's spell?" Sam asked, wondering if that’s what Kevin figured.
The kid merely shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe.” 
You let out a quiet sigh from the little information you had to go on. Sam wasn't about to give up just yet. He decided to take the only lead you had going for all of you. The Men of Letters had enough resources to help. "Well, maybe if we can decipher the footnotes, then we can reverse the spell..." Sam thought out loud a possible plan all of you could follow. He made his way to one of the shelves, pulling out some hardcover books for you to read.
“Punt those winged dicks back to heaven.” Dean said. He slapped his hand against the table in agreement with his brother’s genius idea. Little did he realize what was in store for him. “Where do we start?”
"Research." Sam said, saying his older brother's least favorite word when it came to hunts and solving supernatural problems. He tossed one of the bound books to the table, landing with a rather heavy thud. Dean’s expression of hopefulness slowly fell when he realized there was no getting out of this. "We comb through the library, see if we can find anything else on elamite." 
The older Winchester grabbed the book up from the table and read the title out loud. His excitement for the tedious research ahead darkened at the struggle ahead. “Zimmerman's Encyclopedia of Extinct Languages Volume One: Adai to Atakapa.” He frowned. “How many volumes are there?”
“Twenty-four.” You said. You smiled in delight at the sight of his drooping jaw and the failure for any words to come out. You placed a hand under the table and lightly patted his thigh in reassurance. “Don’t worry, babe. We have all of them.”
“Awesome.” Dean muttered. You were going to be no help for him to try and sneak his way out of this one. His brother only scoffed and turned his attention back down at his book when Dean subtly pleaded to have some mercy thrown his way. However it seemed there was someone looking out for him. Dean was saved from a tedious afternoon filled with research when his phone went off. “There is a God.” 
You rolled your eyes in slight annoyance at how joyous he sounded at being able to slip out from the responsibility of research. You returned your attention back to the first page of the encyclopedia as Dean tended to the phone call. He wasn’t sure who was trying to get in contact with him. It was always a guessing game when a random number flashed across his screen. Dean answered the call after the second ring and was greeted by a familiar voice he hadn’t heard in weeks, not since the awkward departure that sent Cas back on the road alone. The older Winchester wondered if the guy was calling up to reassure him that everything was okay on his end. Or he was in some kind of trouble.
"I may have a case for you. Four missing in Rexford, Idaho. Presumed dead, but no bodies have been released to loved ones." Turned out it was neither of them. To say it was a surprise upon hearing Cas' voice on the other end discussing a possible hunt was a shocker. Dean jumped up from his seat as the man went on without giving even a simple greeting. "And there were reports of a strange substance at the scenes."
"Oh, well, hello to you too, Cas." Dean whispered to the man over the phone, making sure to keep his voice low enough not to disturb everyone who had been working diligently. He knew the moment you heard Cas' name drop into the conversation you would be all over him in trying to ask questions about the whereabouts of the man and how he was doing. So far you had your nose buried in the book and engrossed with whatever you were reading about to care about who he was talking to. “How are you?”
“I...am busy.” Cas answered. 
“All right.” Dean mumbled. He wasn’t sure what to expect from the guy. Cas’ people skills were never the sharpest, despite him being down here on earth for a handful of years and interacting with people. Trying to have a simple conversation with him always ended up with words lost in translation. Dean decided not to try and make small talk and go straight to the reason why Cas called in the first place. “So, how do you want to do this? You want to meet up at the latest scene? You want me to pick you up? What?” 
Dean heard something that sounded to be liquid splashing over the other line, making him momentarily confused as to what the hell Cas was up to. "Um. I've got my hands full. I just—um..." Cas was quickly learning that he wasn't able to multitask. "...thought you would want to know about the case."
"Hey, are you sure everything's—" Dean tried to be a good friend and ask the man about his transition to normal life, but he wasn't able to finish his question when he was cut off by a dial tone. He rolled his eyes and ended the call. “Okay.”
You and the boys were no strangers to taking on a case with little to nothing to go on. From what Dean heard, this seemed like something all of you might be interested looking into. It might turn out to be nothing in the end. Or it could very well be a monster. All Dean knew for sure he couldn't ignore it without at least checking it out by himself. He forgot the last time he was able to go on a hunt by himself. But he didn’t see the need for you and Sam to tag along when there was so much reading to be done. He wasn’t sure if it was even a case after all. Whatever it did end up turning out to be, Dean was going to run with it. It wasn’t everyday he got a perfect excuse to get himself out of doing research. Before Dean went on his way to Idaho, he knew all of this was going to raise a few questions. 
“So, he said nothing about where he is or what he’s been doing?” 
Sam was rightfully confused at the shift in plans after Dean silently excused himself from research only to come back with an overnight bag all packed up and the strap hanging off his shoulder. The younger Winchester was given a brief summary of the conversation Dean had with Cas and nothing much else to go on. He was more caught up with the fact that Cas had given no proper details about his whereabouts and wellbeing. Only about some bogus case Sam personally felt would be better suited in another hunter’s hands. 
“In case you forgot, he’s not exactly Chatty Cathy.” Dean said, walking a few steps up the staircase before stopping to face his brother. 
“And you’re not even gonna see him when you’re in Idaho?” Sam kept on with the questions to try and understand the man’s eagerness to go through with the trip. 
“Well, like I said,” Dean repeated the same excuse he gave you when you found him packing up a bag after you noticed his disappearance from the library. “as long as he’s catnip for angels, he’s keeping his distance.” 
“So, then what’s the point, Dean?” Sam called out to his brother as he continued to the top of the staircase and towards the front entrance. “I mean, it’s barely even a case.” 
“That’s why I’m just gonna go have a little look-see, and we’re not gonna waste a whole lot of manpower on a big pile of nada.” Dean explained to the two men from top the balcony overlooking the lower part of the bunker. If there was one thing Dean was good at, it was always sneaking his way out of wasting a day on reading some dusty old book. 
“In other words, a perfect excuse to bail out on research.” Kevin said, calling out the man on his behavior. 
“You got me.” Dean felt the need to sarcastically reply.
Sam and Kevin were left to tend back to the tedious amount of research that was waiting for them back in the library. All though they were short a pair of eyes, not all hope was lost just yet. They thought there was still one more person who could help keep the reading somewhat manageable. Or so they thought.  
Dean was the first one to notice you had decided yourself that you weren't going to be part taking in research either. He found himself slowing his walking pace when he discovered your lower half sticking out from the backseat of the Impala. While it was always a lovely sight he enjoyed on almost every occasion, this one made a groan of frustration build up in the back of his throat. He should've known you were going to weasel your way into his plans of taking this hunt. You always did. You got yourself out and into a standing position, one hand rested on the car door and the other on your hip. The smile on your lips made him wonder if even holding a conversation as to how you managed to beat him out here was even worth it. 
"You honestly thought you were going to leave without me?" You asked him. Dean tried to open his mouth to give you an answer, you cut him off before he could even breathe. "No way. When's the last time you took a hunt by yourself?"
Dean's face scrunched up at your question, "You don't think I can handle one on my own?"
"I didn't say that. Who says you’re the only one who wants to skip out on research? I really didn't want to spend my time reading eight books on a dead language that might help us translate that stupid tablet." You admitted to him. "Besides, we haven't had any alone time in forever. We can make it a little getaway from Sammy and Kevin."
"I thought you didn't like mixing our dating life with hunts." Dean said. You smiled at the little rule you implemented years ago when you both started going out to make a balance. You walked closer to him so you could wrap your arms around his neck to be near. You looked off into the distance and pretended to think for a second.
“If it is even a case. Might be just something for the cops." You said. “And even if it turns out to be one, we can always add a few more extra days. Tell Sam it's going longer than expected."
Dean pretended himself to think about the plan you hatched up. It didn't take much thought to agree with what you had in mind. He didn't see the harm in letting you tag along, it wasn't like he was going to be around Cas to worry about any winged dicks to make things more complicated. He answered your proposal by leaning down for a kiss before hitting the road. He felt your lips stretch into a smile against his own when he agreed. The man knew deep down you would have come along no matter what he said. This way if trouble got in the way he would be able to keep an eye on you. 
+ + +
By the next morning you and Dean made it to Idaho with your first stop at the most recent crime scene that was still swarmed with police. You managed to blend in with the uniformed officers from the federal clothes you changed into before making your way here. The both of you flashed a pair of smiles and fake badges at the officer in charge in exchange for some information. While Dean chatted up the sheriff, you took the chance to snoop around the property of the most recent victim. 
It wasn't hard to see his living conditions weren't the best. The rundown house he called a home was in desperate need of repairs, not to mention the grass littered with junk from broken down cars to objects rusting from the elements. Despite the neglect to make the place appear tighty, there wasn’t much anything out of the ordinary from what you could tell. All except for for the strange coating on the front windows that overlooked the property. The bubblegum pink clashed with the clutter and ramshackle home. It felt out of place. 
“So, four missing?” You asked the sheriff, making sure to watch your step on the wet grass as you approached the police tape securing off the perimeter. 
"Four dead." The sheriff corrected you. "Just got confirmation." 
“And any common threads you can think of?” Dean wondered. 
You bent over the tape and into the crime scene so you could examine the surroundings a bit better. So far what you could tell was the amount of useless junk lying around the lawn that had been neglected from good mowing for a while. Overgrown grass and weeds helped blend in the things he had kept lying around. It was an eyesore for this neighborhood. 
"Well, Joe in there had the suicide hotline on speed dial. The gal before him was a shut-in. Head enough antidepressants in her medicine cabinet to stock a pharmacy." The sheriff gave you a quick rundown. You crossed your arms over your chest and listened to the theory he had, thinking it might help you in the long run later. “The first victims—a married couple out of Sugar City. Pretty much a walking billboard for no-fault divorce.”
“Were they all basket cases?” You asked. 
“If you asked me to make a list of this county’s saddest sacks, these four would’ve been right on top.” The sheriff said, giving her own personal opinion. 
“All right, so four unhappy people, one of them definitely suicidal.” You summarized all of the information you knew so far at the moment. You passed a quick glance over at Dean when you gave a small shrug from what you had. It wasn't much, but you had a feeling there was more to the story. "But you've ruled out suicide, right?"
The sheriff grabbed a few pairs of what appeared to be rubber gloves from another officer and handed them over to you. You furrowed your brows slightly in confusion when you realized there were also protective booties for your shoes to help from tracking in any dirt into the crime scene. "You're gonna want to put these on." 
You and Dean complied with the request and slipped on the protective equipment before entering the home. The sheriff was the first one inside, opening up the door to possibly one of the strangest crime scenes you had seen in a while. You quickly got an answer to why the windows were tinted bubblegum pink, because the entire place was coated in it. You didn’t know what the hell happened that caused the place to make it seem like a can of paint exploded in here. You highly doubt Joe thought some color in his life would help with his depression. 
You made sure to watch your step as you entered the home after Dean followed the sheriff, taken back by the strange sight himself. You spotted a forensic investigator crouched down on the ground taking a swab of the pink substance. Right away you noticed a foul smell that caused you to press your wrist against your nose in some kind of attempt to help muffle the odor. It reeked of decomposition, a smell you were unfortunately quite familiar with. 
“This look like suicide to you?” The sheriff's question caused you to rethink your theory. You glanced around the place to try and figure out what the substance was. If the police hadn't identified it yet, you wondered if something supernatural might be to blame for this after all. This was starting to feel more like a case after all. Dean took a wild guess when he asked if the substance was blood. “If the tests come back the same as the others, it’s the same as everything. Blood, skin, hair, nails, internal organs, even clothing fibers—like these poor souls got a run through the world’s finest wood-chipper.” 
“What about witnesses?” You asked. 
“Same as the rest. Neighbors reported some kind of pink flash. By the time we got here, all that was left was…” The sheriff took a sweep of the room and the remains of Joe, something he couldn’t quite explain. “this.” 
You and Dean shared a similar expression with one another at what you were learning. The deaths were odd enough for you to keep digging more into what might be the cause of this. People just don't naturally explode without a proper reason why. It seemed Cas found you a legitimate case. What you wondered next was if he was willing to lend in a helping hand. 
+ + +
After checking the crime scene and going through the usual suspects, you and Dean were left back at square one to who or what might be to blame for these deaths around town. The both of you decided to find a motel for the remainder of your stay and switch out of your fed clothes for more comfortable ones. You had a tedious amount of research and what you needed the most was a caffeine pick me up for the long night ahead of you. 
You decided to make a quick call to Sam to see how his own progress was going with the amount of reading he and Kevin were forced to do on their own after you abandoned them. You felt a little guilty for leaving them high and dry, but it seemed like they were functioning just fine on their own. And it seemed your suspicions had turned out to be right when Sam gave you an update on their progress.
 "Yeah, we're almost through the texts over here." Sam said. “We got nothing.” 
“Have you tried Professor Morrison?” Dean suggested.
“Yeah, he’s unreachable. He took a sabbatical to live amongst the trobrianders of Papua New Guinea.” Sam explained yet another useless dead end. You furrowed your brow slightly when you overheard what the professor had been doing in his free time. “Needless to say, we’re pretty burnt out.” 
“Well, there’s one guy there who is nothing if not well-rested.” You felt the need to remind the younger man of the extra housemate who had been rotting in your dungeon. Sam scoffed at the thought of Crowley helping out. "I'm just saying. We're not keeping him chained up for the one-liners."
“It’s worth a shot, I gess.” Sam said. 
"Just be careful, all right?" Dean warned his little brother. "Don't fall for any of his 'quid pro quo' crap." 
“Noted. So, what about you guys?” Sam asked, curious as to how progress was going with the hunt you decided to take. “How’s Cas’ lead panning out?”
“Four victims suddenly exploded. We tried EMF. We looked for hex bags, sulfur—nothing.” You ran down the list of the things you had searched for back at the crime scene only to come up empty with no possible leads of where to go next. 
“Spontaneous combustion?” Sam took a wild guess. “Maybe the Thule?”
“No, no, no. We already ruled them out.” Dean said. “The bodies were vaporized. They weren’t burned.” 
“That sounds like a real case.” Sam was starting to sound worried from how things were starting to shift into something more serious. "Guys, I should be there."
“No, Sammy. That’s not necessary. I’ve got this under control.” You reassured the younger man. "I'll make sure Dean doesn't get into too much trouble. And bug Crowley, see if he knows anything. We'll call you if we hit a dead end." 
When Dean said he was going out for a quick stop, you happily tagged along. It seemed Dean had been doing his own research as well. You found yourself making an extra stop after getting some coffee to discover he wanted to check up on Cas to make sure he was doing all right. He tracked the man’s call to a local gas station. 
You ended the call shortly after exchanging a quick goodbye with Sam, letting him see if the king of hell might be of use for once. You slipped your phone into your pocket for safekeeping before setting your sights on the reason why Dean wanted to head out besides for coffee. He had been doing his own research while you were getting settled into your motel. It was to track down Cas after their shared phone call the day before. You were happy to know the guy was doing all right. But confused as to as to why he was working the register of the local gas-in-sip. 
This entire situation with Cas and his departure from the bunker was strange that left you bothered. Dean held the same excuse when you asked him days after Cas decided to hit the road again. The man had a target on his back with his fellow brothers and sisters. He thought the bunker wouldn't be safe enough to keep you all from the danger. While you were happy to see that Cas was safe and out of harm's way at the moment, you still didn't understand why. Someone was eventually going to find him trying to blend in with the rest of humanity. 
"I don't know if I should laugh or cry." You mumbled under your breath.
"It's kind of funny, if you ask me." Dean said. 
“Of course you would.” You said, rolling your eyes. “I still don’t get why he ditched us.” 
Dean shrugged his shoulders at the answers he couldn’t give to you. He took a sip of his coffee and watched as his friend waited on another customer like he’d been doing this for years. “I’m surprised there’s no one complaining.”
You furrowed your brow in confusion at what you overheard the man mutter into the paper cup. “What?”
"Nothing." Dean replied a little too quickly. He noticed there wasn't an angel taking control and popping out to warn him about letting you go near Cas. So far it was just you staring at him, curious as to what he was hinting around. "Let's go. I wanna play the lotto. Suddenly I'm feeling lucky."
You knew it was Dean's flimsy excuse to go inside the gas-in-sip and ambush your friend at work. You finished the last of your coffee and properly disposed of it in the nearby trash can before following behind the man into the store. You had a few questions you wanted to ask Cas. You weren’t going to leave him alone until he answered them. And to make sure he was truly safe on his own. 
[Next Part]
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Drop of Paradise - Part Three
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Note: Thanks to @dargeon-lissa for helping me with French in the last part.
Multicultural week was an annual thing at François-Dupont, Lila learned from Nino. Doing a presentation was optional, and since it happened every year, most of the kids their age who had a culture worth sharing and were interested in sharing it had done it already.
When Lila asked Ms. Bustier about it, she told Lila that there were going to be fifteen presentations this year. Four each on the first three days of the week, three on Thursday, and then on Friday they would all take a test on what they had learned to make sure they’d been paying attention. Not an important test, she reassured Lila; it was just to make sure the students had taken the week and the opportunity to learn seriously instead of goofing off. Surely someone as well-traveled as Lila would have no difficulty passing the test with flying colors.
From Alya, Lila learned that most of the presentations would be given by students in year six who had just started attending François-Dupont this year. Alya herself had thought about doing a presentation on Martinique, but had ultimately decided against giving herself more work to do when she already had all of her regular homework, her work on the Ladyblog, her babysitter duties with her younger sisters, and her dates with Nino. However, their very own class representative and Alya’s best friend was going to be giving the last presentation of the week after lunch on Thursday.
Apparently Marinette’s presentation was set to be the last one and the only one after lunch on Thursday because the school had decided it would generate much more interest than all of the other presentations. They didn’t want Marinette to accidentally upstage anyone, or rather, Marinette didn’t want to accidentally upstage anyone, and so she had offered to go last. And of course, her presentation was set to be longer than anyone else’s because the school wanted there to be enough time for as many questions as possible to be answered.
Lila would be infuriated about it all if she wasn’t so smart. Fortunately, though, Lila was nothing if not resourceful, intelligent, and clever, so she recognized the situation for the perfect opportunity that it was. Come lunchtime on Thursday, she found herself smirking as she watched Marinette bolt out of the classroom the very instant the bell rang.
She was in a hurry to get home and make sure everything was ready for her upcoming presentation, no doubt. Lila had been keeping an eye on her all week, and it was clear that Marinette had spent most of the time preparing. She was trying so hard to ensure that her presentation would be as close to perfect as it could possibly get. How sad, then, that all of her hard work would be for nothing, because by the time Marinette returned to school, all of her beloved friends would be exactly where Lila wanted them.
Lila carefully schooled her features to replace the smirk on her face with an innocent smile as she collected her lunch tray and headed over to the table where the rest of her classmates were gathered. The seat next to Alya, the place where Marinette usually sat, was vacant. Lila happily took it.
“Yeah, it’s been, like, two weeks,” Alix was saying. She nodded at Lila in acknowledgement when she sat down. “I don’t know why it’s taking so long.”
“I think her cousin is visiting,” Rose said. “We saw her enter the bakery on Saturday when we were getting snacks for our impromptu band practice. Maybe that’s why?”
“Are you guys talking about Marinette?” Lila asked.
“Yeah,” Alix replied. “She said she’d make me some pajama shorts since summer is coming up, but it’s been like two weeks since then. I should probably just buy some, but I don’t want to spend money if I don’t have to.”
“Ask her about it,” Alya suggested. “She could have forgotten about it. That girl is so forgetful. It’s ridiculous.” Alya rolled her eyes playfully.
“She’s also been working on her presentation for multicultural week,” Nino said. “And if her cousin is visiting, she might just be busy.”
“Still,” Lila interjected. “It isn’t fair for Marinette to keep Alix waiting when she promised she’d make her the shorts.”
“Mmph,” Alix grunted. “I’ll just ask her about it after lunch.”
“After her presentation, you mean,” Alya said. “I wonder what it’s about, anyway? The school has been strangely secretive about it, and Marinette’s been ‘too busy’ all week to give me any details.” Alya rolled her eyes again, significantly less playfully.
“I think they’re trying to surprise us with it,” Juleka mumbled, and Lila internally scowled at her. Ugh, mumbling.
“Surprise us?” Nathaniel repeated. “Why would they want to surprise us?”
“They probably want to make multicultural week as engaging as possible,” Lila said. “I mean, hearing about those places first hand is probably the best way to learn about what they’re like in real life. Excluding actually going there, of course.”
“So you’ll have absolutely no problem on the test, Lila,” Rose said.
Lila flipped her hair over her shoulder gracefully. “Of course not.”
“Mmh,” Alya hummed, frowning. “But what about Marinette’s presentation will surprise us?”
“Oh, I know the answer to that,” Lila said. Everyone’s attention focused on her, and she basked in it for a moment before getting back to the task at hand. “I accidentally overheard Ms. Bustier talking with another teacher this morning. Marinette’s presentation is going to be about Eden.”
Alya choked on the water she was drinking. “Eden?!”
Lila shrugged. “That’s what I heard, anyway.”
“Statistically, there’s a 91% chance Lila is correct,” Max said, and Lila had to stop herself from rolling her eyes. He was always rattling on and on about his stupid statistics. It was so annoying. “They’ve been working their way east, so to speak. From the Americas to Africa to Europe and today Asia. Additionally, Alya is correct. Ms. Bustier and the other teachers have been oddly close-lipped about the last presentation. It is quite likely that they’re trying to surprise us with something special. An opportunity to learn about the most reclusive city in the world certainly qualifies.”
“That’s awesome!” Kim exclaimed loudly.
“It’s definitely a lot cooler than what they did for last year’s multicultural week,” Nino agreed.
Alya, however, was frowning. “I didn’t know Marinette was from Eden. Why wouldn’t she tell me? Aren’t I her best friend?”
Lila took on a sympathetic look and reached out to pat Alya’s arm. “Oh, Alya. If it’s any consolation, I don’t think Marinette is actually from Eden.”
A pause. Alya blinked. “What?”
“I doubt Marinette herself is from Eden,” Lila reiterated. “I mean, think about it. Eden revealed itself a few weeks ago, and Marinette is suddenly doing a presentation on it? It seems pretty unlikely.”
Alya frowned again. “Yeah, it does seem pretty unlikely. But would Marinette lie about something like that?”
“Hmm,” Lila hummed, cocking her head. “She’s probably not lying, per say. Just stretching the truth. It’s probably something like her great, great, great, great grandfather is from Eden, and she’s taking advantage of the recent reveal to make her presentation exciting and relevant.”
Alya thought about that for a couple seconds, and then nodded decisively. “You’re right. Marinette would have told me she was from Eden if she really was.”
“Exactly,” Lila said, stifling an eye roll. For a self-described hard hitting investigative journalist, Alya was super easy to play. “And, honestly, that’s why I’m kind of worried.”
A pause. The class stared at her.
“Huh?” Myléne murmured. She was almost as bad as Juleka. “Why are you worried?”
“It’s just,” Lila cast her eyes down like she was feeling shy. “We’re going to take a test tomorrow about everything we’ve learned this week, right? But I doubt Marinette really knows very much about Eden, so I’m worried about you guys. If Marinette gives you all faulty information about Eden you could fail the test. That would be terrible!”
The class took a few moments to process that. Lila eyed Rose and Juleka rather impatiently, waiting for one of them to speak up.
After several seconds too long of silence, it was actually Max who spoke up first, not Rose or Juleka. “Failing one portion of the test would not cause instant failure, but it could severely affect our grades. However, I see no other alternative. Most of the information online is speculative or entirely made up. We currently have no better source of information on Eden than Marinette.”
Lila’s eyes drifted over to Rose and Juleka again, but again neither of them spoke up. Honestly, must she do everything herself?
“Actually,” Lila said. “I could help you guys out. I mean, if you want me to. I spent a whole year volunteering there some time ago, so I know all about Eden and its culture.”
“That’s right!” Rose finally exclaimed. “Lila even helped me start writing a song about Eden on Saturday!”
Juleka nodded. “Yeah.”
“Whoa, seriously?” Alix asked.
“Yup!” Rose chirped, saving Lila the effort of having to do it herself.
“That’s so cool,” Nathaniel said. “I can’t wait to hear it.”
“We can’t wait to play it!” Rose exclaimed, looping an arm around Juleka’s shoulders and putting her other hand on Ivan’s arm. Both Ivan and Juleka gave their versions of a smile, which were hardly worth the title in Lila’s opinion. Apparently “goth” and “socially adept” were mutually exclusive at François-Dupont.
“I want to hear it too!” Kim shouted, and Lila scowled before quickly wiping the expression from her face. They were getting off track.
“Right,” Lila said, loud enough for everyone at the table to hear her. “So if you guys need someone to teach you about Eden, I’d be happy to do it!”
“Really?” Myléne squeaked out.
“That’d be awesome!” Sabrina exclaimed, and Lila grinned viciously when she didn’t see Chloe anywhere in the area. “Please, oh please tell us about Eden, Lila!”
“Yeah, please tell us about it,” Nathaniel agreed.
Lila schooled her face into a hesitant look. She noticeably glanced at a nearby clock. “I really would love too, but I don’t know if I can tell you guys everything you might need to know before lunch is over. I have no idea what questions will be on the test, and there’s so much to say about Eden!” Lila paused for a moment, giving it time, before dramatically perking up. “Actually, I just thought of something!”
“What’s that?” Nino asked.
“They’re not actually taking attendance this week, right?” Lila pointed out. “The school just wants to make sure you know the material. That’s why there’s a test at the end of the week, right?”
“So we could skip for the rest of today and learn what we need to from you instead,” Alix said, saving Lila the effort.
“Exactly!” Lila chirped. “And we could all go out for ice cream while I tell you guys all about Eden. It would be much more fun than sticking around for another presentation, anyway.”
Kim nodded enthusiastically. “Totally!”
Max hesitated, pushing his glasses up his nose. “Getting information from a direct source is likely to be more educational.”
“And way less boring!” Kim shouted, slamming his hands down on the table and jostling everyone’s food. Lila hid her irritation with a well-practiced plastic smile.
Alya hummed loudly, drawing everyone’s attention. She tilted her head. “I can’t deny that a direct source is undoubtedly superior, but what about Marinette’s presentation? She’s been working pretty hard on it.”
Lila frowned. “Are you saying Marinette would want all of us to fail just so we’d see her presentation?”
Alya’s eyes widened. “No! Of course not.”
“Right.” Lila nodded. “Marinette isn’t that kind of person. She won’t care about a silly presentation if it means all of us will be better off. That’s just the kind of friend she is. She’s so helpful, even if she is clumsy and forgetful.”
“That’s right,” Alya agreed.
A grin overtook Lila’s face. “Yeah. So I’m sure she won’t mind you guys skipping out. It’s just a pity she won’t be able to come with us since she has to give her presentation. But maybe I can write up some notes later tonight and send them to her to make sure she doesn’t fail either.”
“That’s so nice of you, Lila!” Sabrina praised.
Lila preened. “Thanks Sabrina! It might hurt my wrists to type that much, but I don’t want Marinette to fail either.”
“What about Adrien?” Nino asked, adjusting his hat. “We can’t leave him out of the loop.”
Lila nodded. “Of course not! I was thinking that we should wait here and see if he arrives early for lunch, and if not, one of you could wait for him and lead him to the rest of us when he arrives. I don’t want to leave him out, and I’m sure Adrien will appreciate a day out with his friends. It’s a real shame his father restricts him to the house so much.”
“Oh yeah,” Nino muttered. “That dude needs to take a chill pill. Or a dozen.”
“But today Adrien might be able to spend a whole afternoon hanging out with his friends,” Lila said. “I’m sure he’ll appreciate it.”
“Totally,” Nino agreed. Lila could see he was completely on board now. They all were. She smiled gleefully.
All week long, Lila had kept an eye on Marinette. In between presentations, all she’d done was help her classmates or work on her own presentation. Both were clearly very important to her.
So for her classmates to miss the presentation she’d worked oh so hard on? That would definitely hurt her. And when she was hurt, she was volatile. Easily manipulated. Most people were.
Any way Marinette reacted, Lila had a plan. Angry? It would be child’s play to make Marinette look like a bully. Sad? How could she be upset at the class for wanting to get good grades? Distant? Being passive aggressive is so cruel and manipulative.
And if she got akumatized? Oh, if she got akumatized, Lila would hit the jackpot. Marinette would almost certainly come after her as an akuma, and Ladybug would surely protect her. Lila could reaffirm her claim to the class about being Ladybug’s best friend, and she could pretend to be scared of Marinette afterwards. Every interaction with Marinette from them on would end with Lila on top without her having to utter a single word. All she would have to do is look terrified and everyone would jump to her defense.
If Marinette was akumatized, Lila would be in the perfect position to eliminate Marinette as a problem. Her false trauma would mean she and Marinette needed to be kept apart. And that opened up a world of possibilities.
She and Marinette couldn’t possibly be in the same class anymore if Lila started trembling every time she set eyes on her. The school would be forced to separate them. The issue would be taken to the principal, and that money-grubbing suck up would obviously choose Lila over Marinette because Lila’s mother was actually important. At the least, Marinette would transfer to another class and away from all of her precious friends. At best, Marinette would be expelled from François-Dupont.
Their classmates would also be forced to choose between Marinette and Lila, and they would choose Lila. Who would side with the aggressor as opposed to the victim, after all? And when Lila had everyone else on her side, Adrien would be hers too. He valued his friendships too much to give the majority of them up for one girl who could barely get a sentence out around him, and he was terrified of rejection from his peers.
Yes, Lila wanted Marinette to get akumatized. She could make everything work out perfectly once she was. And she would be. Lila would make sure of that.
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nitrateglow · 3 years
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My bottom five new-to-me movies of 2020
2020 sucked. So did these movies. Before I do my customary top 20 favorite movie discoveries list, I wanted to share five very special new-to-me movies that were painful to watch. Forgive me if it all sounds like ranting. It probably is.
(And remember-- if you like any of these movies, that’s fine. I am not attacking YOU. I just didn’t like a movie. I know this is a stupid disclaimer to put on a list of opinions, but combing the venomous old IMDB message boards has me on edge a bit lol.)
Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker
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Whether you love the sequel trilogy or hate it, everyone pretty much agrees this movie was a mess. I thought no movie could have a more structurally unsound screenplay than The Crimes of Grindelwald, but Rise of Skywalker gives it staunch competition. It creates a new artform from making things up as the plot requires: new powers for Rey, new Macguffins to pursue, new motivations and backstories for characters.
I admit I dislike The Last Jedi. I dislike it a lot, actually, and it appears JJ Abrams did too from the amount of retconning he does here (Rey isn’t nobody! Honest, guys!). But you can’t backtrack THAT much. Either plot out your entire trilogy before shooting the first film or play fairly with the cards you were dealt by the filmmakers of movie two.
If anything, these movies have become a cautionary tale about not having a plan when making a movie trilogy. Now, George Lucas didn’t really have one either when he was making the original trilogy, but in that case, he wasn’t even sure the first movie was going to be a modest hit, let alone the biggest movie of the 1970s. He had an excuse and did well enough finishing the trilogy. Here, Disney knew there would be sequels, they knew they had a hungry audience, but they chose to just wing it and the results are just-- so disappointing, especially given the talented young actors and lovely special effects they had at their disposal.
The more I think about it, the more poetic the image of Palpatine hooked up to a life support system/crane is. The best ROTS can do is riff on earlier, better movies and hope our affection will make us overlook the awfulness.
Artemis Fowl
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Outside of Animal Crossing, Artemis Fowl might have been the only entity to benefit (if only slightly) from the pandemic. I cannot imagine it would have been anything but a box office bomb had the theaters been open.
Artemis Fowl feels like it should have come out in 2003-- not just because the books were more prominent then, but the whole style of this film in general. In 2020, it’s positively anachronistic. The whole thing is a joyless attempt at dipping from the old Harry Potter well, with a bit of Spy Kids thrown in for good measure. Beyond that, it’s so poorly done as a whole. I have never read the Artemis Fowl books, but I watched this with a friend who has and his head near caught on fire. Apparently, it cuts out everything that made the books cool, like the protagonist basically being a kid version of a Bond villain. Here, he’s anything but that: he’s the usual bland child protagonist surrounded by a cast of slightly more interesting characters. Josh Gad seems to be the only one really trying. Judi Dench shows up and somehow gives a worse performance than whatever the hell she was doing in Cats.
I was actually shocked Kenneth Branagh of all people directed this. I generally like his films, even the less successful ones like his musical adaptation of Love’s Labors Lost. Even the uninspiring live-action Cinderella remake he helmed is at least pretty to look at-- Artemis Fowl has neither brains nor beauty to recommend it.
Bloodline
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This film was intended to jumpstart a career comeback for Audrey Hepburn. This decidedly did not happen. One has to wonder what she saw in this sordid material in the first place. Maybe she really just wanted to work with director Terence Young again? Or she thought this would be a good, more modern take on her screen persona? I have no clue. All I know is that Bloodline is one of the worst big-budget Hollywood movies I have ever seen.
No contest: this is Audrey Hepburn’s worst movie. Hate on Green Mansions and Paris When It Sizzles until the stars turn to ash-- at least there was some fun camp value in them. The plot in Bloodline makes no sense, going into unrelated digressions that lead nowhere (did we really need that extended flashback about the dead father? or the subplot with Omar Shariff’s two families?). Oh and then there’s the awful sleazy snuff film subplot that’s also poorly developed and goes nowhere. Hepburn is game, but she can’t save the sinking ship. The best she can do is be charming in a terrible 70s perm.
Luckily, she made the underrated They All Laughed two years after this cinematic fecal matter bombed, so at the very least, Hepburn’s big screen swan song was a film worthy of her presence. (Hint: there will be more about that movie on my top 20 of the year list!)
Halloween III: The Season of the Witch
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You all have no idea how excited I was to see this. All the mentions of it on Red Letter Media made it sound like deliriously entertaining schlock. I mean, it’s a movie in which the villain sells cursed Halloween masks that turn children’s heads into bugs and snakes! That sounds awesome! Instead, the movie is badly paced and boring: the main characters are uninteresting and the plot takes an interesting premise then does.... nothing with it. Nothing whatsoever. The second act is the cinematic equivalent of treading water. In fact, so little happens, that the filmmakers squeeze in a pointless sex scene between two character who have all the chemistry of a lit match and a bag of M&M’s.
The thing that annoys me most about this film is that it killed off a great concept: that all of the future Halloween films would be standalone stories centered around the spookiest time of the year. Unfortunately, this movie botched itself so badly that people often think the absence of Michael Meyers was the problem. It wasn’t: it was the absence of a good story.
Blindsided
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This is probably the most watchable movie on this list, but that’s not saying much. A bloodless ripoff of Wait Until Dark, Blindsided is an unimaginative thriller with no thrills, humor, or interesting characters whatsoever.
The whole film is just repetitive. The situation doesn’t slowly boil to something horrific, the threat presented by the villains doesn’t escalate, there are no interesting interactions between the characters: no, here the underdeveloped protagonist is interrogated, tortured and/or sexually harassed, tries to escape, is recaptured, rinse and repeat for ninety minutes. I admit there’s some clever resourcefulness on the part of the heroine in the last scene-- but it’s basically just Wait Until Dark’s climax (down to the twist with the villain finding an alternative source of illumination for crying out loud!) without the emotional payoff that comes from slow-burn pacing or the fantastic performances, so even that’s a letdown.
I thought the movie might at least be saved by Michael Keaton as the main criminal mastermind since he’s shown he can be a great villain in other movies (if they had remade Wait in the 80s, he would have been a perfect Harry Roat Jr.), but even he seems to be phoning it in here. Beyond a scene of attempted cat murder (I’m serious-- the bad guys are so incompetent they can’t even kill a cat), there’s not even anything so bad it’s good to enjoy. Blindsided is just dull and by-the-numbers.
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