Why do you dislike the idea of Wen Qing being the top of a ChengQing relationship out of curiosity?
Short answer is that if it wasn't such an overwhelming majority of portrayals, I wouldn't!
slightly longer answer is that the idea that ~all het pairings have to have femdom in order to be acceptably progressive~ cuts off women from being portrayed as fully realized characters. It's a lack of willingness to explore their interiority and to allow them access to the full spectrum of humanity. Male characters are allowed to be messy. Male characters are allowed to pine and fall desperately in love and harbor fears that it's unrequited. Male characters are allowed to feel insecure and uncertain. Male characters are allowed to be loved despite all their flaws and all their mistakes and all their blind spots. Male characters are allowed to change and grow and be forgiven. Female characters have to be perfect angel goddesses who are given out to male characters as rewards to be worshipped. Let female characters down off their pedestals for once, I am begging.
*long sigh* It’s just like… nowadays we express attraction/affection towards a female character by going WOW STEP ON ME QUEEN!!! and towards a male character by going OH THE THINGS I WANT TO DO TO HIM… >:) HE’S SO PATHETIC AND WET
and it’s because we don’t want to be sexist and/or degrading! I absolutely get that! but when we’re actually writing longform narrative about specific characters, I want to be able to explore the character of the individual and the relationship, instead of just having those two sentiments writ large. I don’t want to read about generic Character A/Character B.
and like, again, this is a problem I have with the trend, not with any individual fic. I've read and enjoyed individual fics where she's the dominant one who takes Jiang Cheng apart and makes him beg for it. But why is it all I can find? Why is she slotted into the pigeonhole of "Wei Wuxian's mean lesbian bestie, whose own life never gets any focus" in the background of every other fic? Why does she never get teased by her modern AU friends? When does she get to be impulsive and silly? Why does she always have to be “too smart” to get involved in shenanigans? Why does she never get to let her guard down? When does she get to feel safe enough to relax her prickles and expose her vulnerable underbelly? Why does she never get to have vulnerabilities at all? Why does she never get to be soft, why does she never get to be sweet, why does she never get to rest and be taken care of? Why does she always have to have everything together? Why does she never get to appreciate or be grateful for someone else's good points, someone else's strength? Why does she have to be good at literally everything, instead of ever getting to let someone else compensate for the things she's not good at? She's lost so much, just as much as any male character in the series; why does she never get to cry and mourn and be held and comforted? Why does she always, always have to be the strong one? When does she get to put that burden down? Why is her canonical moral ambiguity never given space, when Jiang Cheng's is always portrayed as an obstacle between them? Why do her canonical wrongdoings never require forgiveness or atonement? Why doesn't she ever get portrayed as feeling guilty for the atrocities she stood by and let happen— that she outright enabled? Why does she never get to be a person?
tl;dr: every single time the male character gets to be a skrunkly meowmeow, his female love interest should also get the same treatment, dammit.
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Randomized Robins AU - Ages + Worst Trait Exercise:
Steph (25):
Says her worst trait is her murderous rages (she is exaggerating for dramatic/comedic effect, she’s killed 3 people tops and for very good reason)
Thinks her worst trait is her spitefulness (one of the few traits she definitely got from her father + one that prevents her from fixing her relationships and living her best possible life. She’ll refuse to interact with someone she dearly loves after an argument (happens significantly less after Tim’s death) or will say things she knows are hurtful just for the sake of having the last word. This trait will worsen in some ways as the list of people who have wronged her and those she loves grows, but will also ease up as she matures and realizes the harm it’s doing to her relationships with those she loves most.)
Her worst trait really is her spitefulness
Cass (26)
Says her worst trait is her self-righteousness (she believes that her goals are righteous and, as a result, she is righteous. Cass becomes very defensive whenever someone questions the mission and often does not second-guess herself. This is a trait she only develops later in life as she grows closer to Bruce/learns to understand herself more/starts to love herself more. But she knows she isn’t perfect and when somebody she trusts criticizes something she is doing she is willing to listen. She just usually isn’t the one to START the introspection.)
Thinks her worst trait is her self-righteousness.
Her worst trait actually is her obsessiveness (she gets it from Bruce and, while not as bad as him, she will easily become preoccupied with her night-life and the mission if someone isn’t there to pull her back. She will do this to the point of self-destruction and it hurts her relationships with the people she loves, especially Steph.)
Tim (24)
Says his worst trait is his spitefulness (he actively rejects the idea of mending his relationships with the older members of the family and this causes him to also lack good relationships with the younger ones)
Thinks his worst trait is his obsessiveness (similar to Cass, if he gets fixated on a task or idea he will neglect everything else in his life in order to dedicate more time to it. Unlike Cass, he will almost never be dragged away from it unless Pierrot snatches control of the body and forces them to take care of themself.)
His worst trait actually is how manipulative he is (the KING of guilt-tripping and using people’s emotions against them. He’ll do whatever he needs to do to get what he wants, he’s not above crocodile tears. And he will do it to whoever he needs (or wants) to with little care for how his actions impact others.)
Pierrot (Insists: “Age doesn’t apply to me! And even if it did, I'd probably be the oldest. Or the youngest! I’d never be a middle child, though.” Mental assessments by the Bats have put him around 21, with a margin of error of 3 years. Pierrot has called this “blatant character assassination by my eternal rival!”)
Says his worst trait is that he is an irredeemable psychopath without any regard for the wellbeing of others (this is a lie and everyone who's important to him understands this).
Thinks his worst trait is his parasitic nature (he literally would not exist had Tim not suffered the way he did. Plus he is a living reminder of one of the worst things that happened to many of his loved ones. He is a parasite injected into a functional person's body and contributes to his continued suffering. This is also a largely incorrect judgement of himself, caused by his actual worst trait.)
His worst trait actually is his limited sense of self (he doesn’t really know who he is outside of ‘inheritor to the legacy of the Joker (a man he despises yet also views as a father)’ and ‘chip in Tim’s brain that became sentient’. He slowly develops an identity over the course of his life and relationships with other people, but he lacks the foundations of identity that most people have. Pierrot will often almost become a caricature of himself and what others perceive him to be because it's the only person he knows how to be. This causes wild swings in how he behaves and relates to others, sometimes to the detriment of himself and others.)
Dick (17)
Says his worst trait is his clinginess (he is a very extraverted person who likes to be around others, which mixed with his fear of abandonment after his parents died means that if he goes a few days without seeing/talking to a friend he will get very anxious.)
Thinks his worst trait is his anger issues (he gets ticked off very easily and will explode on people. He’s kind at his core and is usually very nice, but he has a temper that can escalate significantly. Spoiler (and later Twist) help him channel this anger into something positive.)
His worst trait actually is his anger issues.
Barbara (18)
Says her worst trait is her disability (internalized ableism, she thinks of herself as less valuable than the other Bats because she cannot be out there in the capes like they can. She will grow out of this as she matures and as she learns how invaluable her support for the team is.)
Thinks her worst trait is her disability
Her worst trait actually is her overly-independent nature (In an attempt to overcompensate for everything she can no longer do, she has resolved to do literally everything that she possibly can without any help from others. This results in many instances where she either takes on too much and winds up not being able to fully realize any of her tasks or where she makes her life and the lives of others significantly harder by refusing help when offered/not asking for it when she needs it.)
Damian (16)
Says his worst trait is his perfectionism (he is overly critical of both himself and others, taking any flaw or problem and amplifying it to an absurd degree. This is due in part to his life with the LoA (where even a brief misstep could lead to death), in part to how others treated him initially as Spoiler (any flaw was fixated on and used as a reason to either mistrust him or portray him as unworthy of the mantle), and in part due to the fact that he is Bruce’s son (the only person with worse perfectionism problems than Damian). Gradually, Damian has improved in this regard but it’s still a massive barrier to both his own happiness and his relationships with others.)
Thinks his worst trait is his perfectionism
His worst trait actually is his perfectionism
Duke (16)
Says his worst trait is his definitely-real secret evil side (says this as a ‘my dad is a villain so who knows??’ joke)
Thinks his worst trait is his impulsivity in his words (Sometimes he will crack a joke or say a remark without thinking it through, leading to a LOT of hurt feelings and drama. He’ll say something without thinking it through and wind up seeming insensitive. This isn’t done because of malice, rather because Duke is someone who’s quick to act and speak. But while the mantle of Insight and his awakening powers have helped him with his actions, they do not always help with his loose tongue. As such, Duke gains an unfair reputation in the media as an instigator and will accidentally cause family drama through what he says.)
His worst trait actually is his impulsivity in his words
Jason (14)
Says his worst trait is his bad manners (he grew up on the streets and has no idea how rich-people society works, which he’s pretty insecure about considering he’s now the youngest kid of Bruce freaking Wayne).
Thinks his worst trait is his reactiveness (Jason never got the privilege of planning ahead for various events in his life, so he instead needed to rely on being swift and harsh in how he could react to situations. It’s saved his life on multiple occasions and helps significantly in his role as Spoiler, but it can also lead to extreme overreactions (accidentally causing kidnapping scare after Jason ran away following a fight with Dick) and a struggle to plan things out ahead of time. As he grows more secure in his place in the family and in life, this trait will lessen but never fully dissipate.)
His worst trait actually is his reactiveness
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