#it didn't write itself after the last few paragraphs

[leisureflame]

"I CANT THINK"

If you write, I assure you you have thought that.

Fear no more child, for I have found a solution.

it's called Rapid writing

something we learned when I was in 9th grade drama class and I cannot emphasize enough just how effective it is. Its actually what gave me the idea for my first book.

Stop what you are doing and do what I tell you

go grab either a pencil and paper (or open an empty document)

set a timer for 2 minutes

ask a friend to give you a random sentence. I have a few examples that I myself rapid wrote to: a) I looked around and saw b) the old lady hung from the ceiling and laughed c) purple paint dripped from her long purple fingernails d) there is a hole in my ceiling. e) when I am sad I... f) When you close the door, I... g) there is a wooden door with a gold doorknob

Now the most important thing is not to think of this sentence before you start writing. as soon as you decide which one if you are choosing from my examples (or as soon as you hear it if you are getting if from a friend), start the timer.

start writing the sentence and without hesitating just keep writing. the #1 rule here is to not stop or hesitate for a single second until the 2 minutes are over. you can write nonsense if you want and if you REALLY can't continue then write some random words for a couple of seconds then continue AS LONG AS YOU ARE STILL WRITING.

another rule is that you are not allowed to delete. even if its a spelling error, just ignore it.

after the timer is done, I promise you will have something to work with. now copy the paragraph you wrote and paste it below, here you can start fixing spelling errors and adding things at your own pace because now the creative side of your brain has opened.

don't think about the way you are writing or the words you use, think about the story you are telling. the idea.

Sometimes you will get something beautiful and deep like I did here:

When I am sad I go to my blanket, not many people know about it, all they think is happening is that a child likes to cuddle in a blanket, but no. my blanket has a special thing about it, it is a magical blanket, well, not the blanket itself but the embroidery on the blanket, it simply takes my sadness away but it adds the story of my emotions to the embroidery, my blanket is a very pretty one, it is a pastel blue color and it has so much silk embroideries that you just think its patterns, but it isn't, if you look deeper you will find stories every one of those stories came from someones tears... my tears. whenever i cry, i wipe my tears with my blanket and my pain goes but my story stays.

or

there is a wooden door with a gold doorknob on the door there is a painting of you, and there are many locks on the door from top to bottom, when you open the door, there is a mirror. this door is the door to self discovery, from the outside there is a painting of how people think you look like but when you open the door, you get to see what you really are in detail and look at yourself they way you want to, you can smile or cry and the refection on the mirror will change but on the painting, it doesn't show ur emotions, just how people see you usually.

or you can get something so stupid like i did here:

there is a hole in the ceiling in my classroom. everyday a dinosaur would a pear and eat my lunch and i keep coming home hungry but my mom dsays she packed me enough food. so she didn't feed me. i told her a dinasour was eating my lunch but she said that disasours only live in Norway! so i went into the school vents looking for that idino and revenge my food, we met at last, held our weapons, i was holding a subway sandwich and the dino was holding a bana na MY BANANA  i lost it, so i attacked him one hit on the head and the whole species were extinct , people thousand of years from now said dinos got extinct because of a meteorite but i know better, also i am still alive because whoever kills a dino becomes immortal, also i killed my mom for not believing me and let her starve in her grave just like she let made me starve. and then i killed everyone who was a flat earther because i hate them and now i can kill anyone once i tap them with my super subway sandwich 

(by the way, ignore the horrible spelling, the examples i gave were from the unedited version.)

THE POINT IS ITS ACTUALLY SO HELPFUL. you can use it for a new story idea (i used the blanket one as an element in one of my WIPs and it helped the story a lot) or if you get something stupid like the dino one I wrote THATS GOOD THATS FINE because now you have your creativity going.

I challenge you to actually try this and PLEASE share it with me I LOVE reading other peoples rapid writings. have fun <3

tagging @cosmosandcapybaras24 @ajsbookshelf @gloryofdawn, @chaoticharmony93 @deception-united and anyone else who's interested to try this out and share with me!

#writing #creative writing #writing tips #creativity #writers block #creative block #writer stuff #writeblr

[heartsandhischier]

Rinkside Romance

nico hischier x reader

summary - 3.2k words. Y/N, an author has an unexpectant meeting with the captain of the New Jersey Devils, Nico Hischier

note - this is my first writing ever, so I hope you all like it :)

The aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air, a rich symphony of scents mingling with the soft murmur of conversation that enveloped the quaint little coffee shop. The sound of the coffee machines whirred in harmony with the gentle hum of patrons bustling about, seeking respite from the chilly evening.

Amidst the comforting ambience, Y/N found herself engrossed in the world of her latest novel, her fingers dancing across the keyboard as she wove her characters through the last paragraph of the chapter. Her hands moved swiftly, navigating the keys with practiced ease, each click punctuated by the rhythmic beat of the nearby espresso machines.

As she reached for her steaming cappuccino, her heart skipped a beat, realizing the cup was empty. With a sense of urgency to maintain her creative momentum, she hurried to the counter, her mind already lost in the world of her story. “Another one?” the barista questioned, his voice rising above the din of orders being shouted out and the hiss of steam from the machines. Y/N nodded, a smile playing on her lips as she slid him the empty cup across the counter.

Her gaze wandered across the bustling cafe, taking in the familiar faces and comforting atmosphere that had made it her sanctuary since moving to New Jersey. But then, her attention was captured by a figure across the room – a man whose rugged charm and quiet confidence seemed to draw her in.

His hand swept his dark hair away from his face, revealing warm brown eyes that met hers with a sparkle. Their eyes met briefly, and in that fleeting instant, the moment felt like a page ripped from one of her books. Amidst the hustle and bustle of the coffee shop, he held her gaze, momentarily suspending time itself. It felt as though the world had quieted, leaving only the two of them in a shared moment of serenity amidst the chaos. 

“Cappuccino for Y/N!” snapping back to reality as her name was called, Y/N collected her fresh cappuccino, thanking the barista with a nod of gratitude. As she grabbed the cup, she turned back to look for the stranger with the big brown eyes. To her surprise, he was still there, seemingly frozen in time, his gaze unwaveringly fixed on her as she smiled. With a last shy smile, Y/N returned to her booth, unaware that destiny was about to intertwine.

Puck Drop and Bar Hops

A few weeks later, Y/N found herself amidst a lively crowd at a local sports bar, her friend had begged her to come as she wanted to show her the life, the energy, and the love the city had for their sports team. Tonight it was a hockey match, the new jersey devils against the dallas stars. Y/N didn't know too much about the sports, but kept her eyes glued to the screen as she struggled to keep up with where the puck was. No matter the extent of her knowledge or lack thereof, her friend was right, the energy was impeccable as the whole bar rustled and shaked as the team scored goal after goal. Cheers and glasses of beer clinking together as the New Jersey Devils won 5-2. “See! It wasn't too bad getting out of your apartment to experience this right?” Jessica chimed, she had in fact struggled to get Y/N out of the apartment as she went on about wanting to finish the chapter she was currently engrossed in. Y/N stuck her tongue out mockingly as they both laughed, “Come on! You need to come out more, explore the city, not just your apartment and the coffee shop! It might even give you some inspiration for your books,” 

A few weeks later, Y/N found herself amidst a lively local sports bar, her friend Jessica having begged her to come out and experience the vibrant energy and passion the city has for their sports team. Tonight, it was a hockey match–the New Jersey Devils against the Dallas Stars. Y/N didn’t know too much about the sport, nevertheless kept her eyes glued to the screen as she struggled to keep up with the whereabouts of the puck. No matter the extent of knowledge or rather lack thereof. Jessica’s enthusiasm was contagious, and Y/N couldn’t help but get swept up in the excitement as the whole bar erupted in cheers with each goal scored by the Devils. The atmosphere was electric, with glasses clinking together and jubilant chants filling the air as the Devils secured a decisive 5-2 victory.

“See! It wasn’t too bad getting out of your apartment to experience this right?” Jessica chimed, a triumphant grin spreading across her face. Y/N playfully stuck her tongue out in response, joining in the laughter that bubbled between them.

“Come on! You need to go out more, explore the city, not just your apartment and the coffee shop! It might even give you some inspiration for your books,” Jessica continued, nudging Y/N with a playful elbow.

As they chatted and celebrated, Jessica leaned in closer, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “You know, this bar is where the team usually comes to unwind after games,” she revealed, excitement dancing in her eyes. “Who knows, maybe we’ll get to meet some of the players.”

Before Y/N could respond, the door swung open, causing a wave of cheers to erupt from the fans in the bar as all heads turned to face the entrance. The atmosphere crackled with excitement as a group of familiar faces made their grand entrance–the New Jersey Devils themselves. 

They were greeted with enthusiastic pats on the backs and a flurry of “Go Devils!” from the triumphant fans as they navigated through the bar, basking in the adoration of their supporters. Among them, Y/N’s gaze was immediately drawn to a pair of unmistakable brown eyes, their warmth and familiarity sparking a sudden surge of recognition within her.

Her heart raced as she watched the players move through the crowd, their presence commanding attention and admiration from everyone present. Could it truly be him? The realization sent a thrill through her, igniting a spark of home and curiosity that she couldn't ignore.

“They’re cute right!” Jessica giggled next to her, her eyes glued to the players now standing by the bar. Y/N turned around in confusion, as her friend pried her eyes away from the players ordering drinks and beers. “Y/N you were quite literally drooling,” Jessica laughed, as a heath rushed to Y/N cheeks. 

Caught off guard, Y/N blushed hard as she attempted to regain her composure. “I, uh, I guess so,” she stammered, her gaze flitting nervously between Jessica and the group of athletes at the bar. 

Jessica leaned in closed, her continuing to eye the players. “I think Timo Meier is pretty cute,” she admitted with a playful grin. “But, oh my god, have you seen the captain? He’s also Swiss, like Timo, and he was a first-round draft pick. And those big brown eyes? Endearing as hell!” 

As the evening wore on, Jessica couldn’t help but gush about the players pointing them out amidst the crowd. Y/N listened intently, her eyes skipping a beat as Jessica rambled on about their captain, Nico, pointing to a tall familiar figure. With a jolt of recognition she realized that Nico, the captain Jessica has been raving about, was the same guy from the coffee shop. Her cheeks flushed with warmth as she stole a glance in Nico’s direction, her mind racing with newfound understanding.

Suddenly, a bartender approached their table, a tray of drinks in hand. “These are from one of the players,” he announced with a wink. “Lucky you!”

Y/N’s eyes widened in surprise as she glanced over to the bar, spotting the hockey player with the familiar brown eyes. A rush of excitement coursed through her veins as she quietly thanked herself for agreeing to go out today. 

Emboldened by the gesture, Y/N found herself drawn to the bar, her heart pounding in her chest as she took a big swig of her drink and approached the handsome stranger. With a warm smile, she thanked Nico for the drinks, her voice steady and sure. Nico’s laughter filled the air, a melodic sound that wrapped around her like a comforting blanket. “You’re welcome,” he replied, his tone warm and inviting.

Before she could say anything else, he extended his hand with a charming grin. “I’m Nico,” he introduced himself, his eyes twinkling with amusement. Y/N felt a rush of nerves as she struggled to respond, the weight of Nico’s presence catching her off guard, and in the heat of the moment without thought she blurted out an awkward “I know,” immediately cringing at her own words. Nico’s laughter only grew louder, genuine amusement dancing in his eyes. “Well, it’s nice to meet you again, ‘I know’,” he teased gently, his easy going demeanor putting her at ease.

Blushing furiously, Y/N couldn’t help but laugh along with him, the tension of the moment melting away in the warmth of their shared laughter. “Sorry, that probably sounded weird,” she chuckled nervously. “My friend just told me about the team and their captain, and then I realized it was you and…” you rambled on as you tried to explain yourself as the awkwardness you felt lingered. Nico shook his head, his smile widening as he interrupted your panic. “Not at all. It’s kind of cute actually,” he reassured her, his gaze warm and reassuring.

Relieved by his response, Y/N felt her nerves begin to ease. “Thanks,” she replied, a genuine smile lighting up her face. “So, uh, what brings you to the bar tonight?” she asked, eager to keep the conversation flowing.

As the evening progressed, the conversation between Y/N and Nico flowed effortlessly, punctuated by shared laughter and easy banter. Y/N occasionally glanced over at her friend Jessica, ensuring she was enjoying herself, only to find her deeply engaged in conversation with Timo Meier, the player she has pointed out earlier.

Feeling a surge of happiness for her friend’s newfound connection, Y/N turned her attention back to Nico. With each passing minute, she found herself drawn further into Nico’s magnetic presence. Her initial nervousness gave way to a growing sense of comfort and excitement. And as the night wore on, she couldn’t shake the feeling that this unexpected encounter was just the beginning of something truly special. 

Jersey lights and Italian Delights

The clicking of Y/N’s heels echoed across the lobby of her apartment building as she nervously adjusted her dress, the sleek black fabric hugging her curves in all the right places. She had opted for a longer dress at Jessica’s suggestion, feeling a bit out of her comfort zone in such formal attire, especially for a date. Taking a deep breath, she gathered her courage before stepping out into the cool evening air.

As she descended the steps, her heart raced with anticipation. There he was, leaning against the sleek black car, his brown hair swept back, revealing those familiar and warm brown eyes. When he spotted her, his face lit up with a smile that sent butterflies fluttering in her stomach. 

“Hey there, ‘I know’,” he greeted her, his voice filled with warmth and affection. “You look stunning!”

Y/N felt her cheeks flush at his compliment as she approached him, his arms wrapping around her waist in a comforting embrace. Meeting his gaze, she couldn’t help but smile back. “Thank you,” she replied softly, her heart racing with excitement. “Ready for our date?”

Their first date was nothing short of magical – a candlelit dinner at a cozy Italian restaurant, where time seemed to stand still as they delved into deep conversations and shared intimate stories. Amidst the flickering candlelight, Nico and Y/N’s connection only grew stronger as the night went on.

As their relationship progressed, Y/N and Nico found themselves drawn to familiar places that held special memories for them. None more so than the cozy quaint coffee shop where they had first locked eyes. 

“One cappuccino for my favorite author!” Nico’s voice rang out cheerfully as he approached their table, bearing two steaming cups of coffee. Y/N glanced up at the brown haired man, a smile tugging at her lips at his playful remark. Accepting the coffee, she savored the rich aroma before taking a sip, feeling the warmth spread through her. “Well, thank you, my favorite hockey player in the NHL,” she quipped in return as he settled into the booth opposite her. Nico chuckled, a playful glint in his eyes. “Yeah, I’d better be,” he teased, reaching across the table to gently brush his fingers against hers.

Their playful banter was interrupted by the familiar sound of Y/N’s phone buzzing with a notification. It was an email about her book release event, scheduled for the following week. Excitement bubbled up inside her as she shared the news with Nico. “I’d love for you to come,” she said, her voice tinged with anticipation. “It would mean the world to me to have you there.” Nico’s response was immediate and unwavering. “Of course I’ll be there,” he said, his brown eyes filled with sincerity.

“I wouldn’t miss it for anything.”

As the day of the book release event arrived, Y/N felt a mix of nerves and excitement coursing through her veins. Sitting at the table where she signed copies of her book for eager fans, her heart was fluttering with each interaction. Amidst the bustling atmosphere, she couldn’t help but notice a familiar figure in the line. It was Nico, patiently waiting with a copy of her newly released book clutched to his chest.

When Nico finally approached her table, his eyes lit up with excitement as he handed her his copy of her book. “Hey there ‘I know’,” he greeted warmly, a grin spreading across his face, “I’ve been looking forward to getting my hands on a signed copy of this book. I’ve heard the author is amazing!”

Y/N chuckled, feeling a warmth spread through her. She signed his copy, adding a little extra flourish with a heart next to her signature.

“Well, a little special signature for my favorite fan then!”

As the event came to a close, Y/N stood up from her seat, approaching Nico who had been engaging with her fans and colleagues throughout the evening. She smiled at him, her heart swelling with gratitude. “Thank you for being here,” she spoke softly. “Having you by my side means more to me than you’ll ever know.”

Nico pulled her into a warm embrace, his arms wrapping around her protectively. “I’ll always be here for you,” he whispered, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead. 

“No matter what.”

From Ice to Ink

Amidst the whirlwind of her book release and hectic schedule, Y/N found herself attending her first hockey game at the Prudential Center in New Jersey. Adorned in Nico’s jersey, proudly displaying the number 13 on her back, she felt a sense of pride and excitement as she entered the arena to support Nico and the New Jersey Devils as they faced off against the Nashville Predators.

Welcomed by a friendly security guard, Y/N was guided to the room reserved for the players’ wives and girlfriends, where she was warmly greeted by the other women. Engaging in conversation and camaraderie, she felt a sense of belonging among them, despite it being her first time attending a game. As the game started, Y/N found her seat alongside the other wives and girlfriends, excitement filled the air. And Y/N couldn’t help but feel a surge of pride as she watched Nico and the Devils take to the ice. 

As the game unfolded, the tension in the area was palpable. The Predators put up a strong fight, but the Devils matched them stride for stride. The score remained close throughout the game, with both teams trading goals in a back-and-forth battle. Y/N watched with bated breaths as Nico and his teammates fought tirelessly on the ice. The energy in the arena was electric, with fans on the edge of their seats as the team vied for control of the game.

Finally, in the third period, with the score tied, Nico seized a golden opportunity. As the puck soared into the back of the net, the arena exploded with cheers and applause. Amidst the jubilant roar of the crowd, Nico’s celebration was a sight to behold. With a leap of sheer exhilaration, he raised his arms triumphantly, his face radiant with joy. 

Turning towards the stands, his gaze found Y/N amidst the sea of cheering fans. A wide smile spread across his face as he blew her a kiss, a gesture filled with love and appreciation. In that moment, amidst the deafening roar of the crowd, it was as if time stood still, and their connection shone brightly for all to see. 

As the final buzzer sounded, signaling the end of the game, the scoreboard read: New Jersey Devils 4, Nashville Predators 3. The Devils had emerged victorious in a hard-fought battle, much to the delight of fans in attendance. 

After the game Y/N waited patiently with the other women in the lounge as the players headed to the locker room. Y/N couldn’t resist checking social media for highlights of the game. To her surprise, she stumbled upon a clip of Nico’s post-game interview, “The celly you did after your goal was terrific,” the interviewer remarked. “That kiss into the crowd was that planned? Perhaps directed at someone?”

Nico’s smile widened as he responded, “Well, it was a special moment for me. It’s actually my girlfriend’s first game here, so I just wanted to show her a little extra love.”

Watching the interview, Y/N felt a rush of emotion as Nico publicly referred to her as his girlfriend for the first time. When Nico finally emerged from the locker rooms, she couldn’t contain her excitement, rushing to greet him with a big hug and congratulations on the win and his goal.

“So, I’ve been upgraded from ‘I know’ to girlfriend now, huh?” she teased playfully.

Nico chuckled, his eyes filled with affection. With a gentle smile, he pulled away and reached into his suit pocket, retrieving something special from the night - a puck. It was inscribed with the words “Y/N’s first game” in white marker. 

“Well, it would be my pleasure if you’d want that promotion,” he replied, his gaze locked onto hers with those captivating brown eyes as he presented her the puck. 

Y/N was feeling ecstatic, with a surge of happiness she chuckled with excitement and nodded eagerly. As their eyes met, he grinned and leaned in to give her a tender kiss, sealing the moment with a promise of more to come.

#nico hischier #nico hischer x reader #nico hischier x y/n #nico hischier x you #nico hischier x reader #hockey fanfic #nhl fanfic #nico hischier fanfic #new jersey devils #new jersey devils fic #new jersey devils x reader #new jersey devils imagine #njd #nj devils

[queseraone]

Talk shop Tuesday: how many and which fics do have planned or have started writing? Talk about them. 🤭

Omg you brat 🙈💗

So I am, of course, insane, and have a Google Doc to keep myself organized (suddenly wondering why I didn't make a Google Sheet... a change may be in order!)

Anyway, so I have "in-progress," "ideas," "abandoned?" and "completed" lists (and then I link to each of the docs within the doc, because I like organization, okay?). I also have a list of lyrics/title ideas and "homeless pieces of writing" (where I copy and paste things that didn't quite fit into a particular fic) in here as well. It's like my own little master list.

Still along for the insanity ride? I swear there's a method to my madness.

I consider a fic in-progress if I've actually started writing it (as in, I have written actual sentences/paragraphs for it, not just jotted down a few bullet points), so here is that list:

6x06 post-ep fic (Tim's Version - hope to have this done in the next few days, if the muse cooperates)

a very (very) bare bones start to a car accident angst-fest

a beachy AU that may and may not happen

an outsider POV fic I started during Chenford Week last year and am on the fence on finishing (it's sooooo random and and feels kind of pointless, but I love outsider POV fics)

a continuation of our 5x08 spec fic collab (because girl, we cannot leave it like that)

On the ideas front (this includes both ideas with tons of notes/plans, and ones with two bullet points and a prayer):

a smutty reunion of sorts...

a sort of enemies-to-lovers AU (Lucy is either a reporter or a screenwriter... or both?, Tim is a cop)

a what-if sort of scenario - what if Lucy and Emmett dated longer (or got back together) - aka how Tim realizes he's in love with her and makes his move

Contractor Tim AU (iykyk - this is basically born out of my desire to not waste the 10K+ words I started for Linstead - we shall see if I'm able to reimagine it for Chenford)

a collab with you that I think would be so much fun (the experience and the actual fic itself), so I really hope we can make that happen together

a Wildest Dreams-inspired collab with @makeitastrength that'll hopefully be a hiatus project

a little thing that's basically me bashing the go-to jealousy trope and coming at it from a totally different (fluffy) angle

an inkling of an idea to go back and dive deeper into various conversations between Tim and Angela over the years (including scenes we saw on the show and scenes we didn't)

And, for fun, a list of ideas I've abandoned (maybe temporarily, maybe forever):

a heartbreaker where Kojo dies - but also included a trip down memory lane at some moments in his/their life so it wasn't pure sadness (full disclosure, this was basically my personal therapy after my dog died a few weeks ago. I am so sorry Kojo, I promise I'm your number one cheerleader)

a fun group/couples game night (the result of me misreading a prompt that said "it's a fight, couples fight" and then the idea of the couples battling it out took over my mind... 😅)

I feel like I'm missing a few more, but this is already the longest, most insane response ever... and if you made it to the end? Congratulations/I'm sorry.

ILY 💖

#talk shop tuesday #asked and answered #timandlucy #writing #chenford #the rookie

[little-tyrant-gortash]

Oathbreaker

Pairing: fem!Tav x Enver Gortash, fem!Tav/Astarion

Tags: Emotional Manipulation, Manipulation, Manipulative Relationship, Paladin Tav (Baldur's Gate), Vaginal Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Drunk Sex, Unrequited Love, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Scars, Blood and Injury, Injury, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Pregnancy, Unplanned Pregnancy, Miscarriage, Torture, Psychological Torture, Implied/Referenced Torture

Word count: 2,087

Ao3 here.

Chapter 1.

Chapter 2.

Chapter 3.

Chapter 4.

Chapter 5.

Chapter 6.

Chapter 7.

Chapter 8.

Chapter 9.

Chapter 10.

Chapter 11.

Chapter 12.

Chapter 13.

Chapter 14.

Chapter 15.

Chapter 16.

Chapter 17. ⬇

Chapter 18.

Notes: I may have rushed to write this chapter - I wanted to play Baldur's Gate 3 tonight -, but I was SO! WAITING! FOR THIS MOMENT AAAAAAAAA IT'S FINALLY HERE-

I've had the last few paragraphs locked away in the depths of my brain for an entire month!!

That one scene in my mind was the reason I've started writing this fanfic. 😂

The plot thickens. It'll be very intense. I'll love it! 😈

Hopefully you will like it, too. Or not. Either way, I love to read your thoughts! 😁🖤

Chapter 18: The Vampire Ascendant

She should've expected that Gortash had plans for that day.

A tailor came over that morning to fit her for a dress that she was pretty sure she never would've put on otherwise. It was a black evening dress, with a way too low cut down her back which was covered with thin lace, and the entire dress was decorated with golden thread embroidery, depicting dragons – very similar to the ones that Gortash had on the collar of his leather coat.

"I'm not putting this on", she protested when the tailor finished and left them alone in one of the audience chambers.

"First of all, I've put hours into the design", Gortash started, and she stared up at him in disbelief.

"You designed it?"

"-secondly, I've paid a lot for it to be made."

"I hate it when you're spending money on me", she motioned towards him, then at the dress. "Can't I just settle for something I can get for myself?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Just accept it. It's a gift."

"Why are you doing this to me?!" Tav whined, running a hand in her hair.

Five minutes of arguing later, though, she begrudgingly let Gortash chase her into yet another thing she wouldn't've done otherwise. It really was a beautiful dress, she loved it the moment she saw it – she just didn't like that he spent so much on her.

The guest list was unknown to her, but she had to go with him after lunch to check the hall where the ball would be held. The servants were busy preparing everything to be perfect; of course, the main colours were black and gold again, full with – yet unlit – black candles and a way too big space in the middle, with tables near the doors to the balcony. The tables already had some of the drinks on them. Gortash was busy talking to some of those who were responsible for the event itself, and Tav glanced up at the ceiling which was, in fact, beautifully done in colourful glass.

When she stopped in the middle of the room and looked around, seeing that the place would be able to hold a lot of people, noticing the prepared musical instruments in one of the corners, it just occurred to her that there was yet another task Gortash would demand from her that day.

Dance.

Tav paled.

The last time she danced with Wyll came in her mind. She was beyond hopeless, even if she just followed Wyll. Given her past and her training as a Paladin, she had little to no time for such fine arts. Frankly, she didn't even care about it.

That was something Gortash knew by heart by now. He'd spent enough time around nobles and must've attended their stupid parties to know how to move amoung them. But her? She'd be the world's most disappointing dance partner he ever had.

The panic rapidly built in her lower abdomen until she started to feel positively nauseaous. That was when Gortash stopped beside her and glanced up at the glass ceiling, too.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" He asked her quietly. "You should see it during a full moon. The colours are so different then."

Tav's throat went dry. She glanced at him, but he was still enjoying the view, and she just realised that he looked about ten years younger. Observing his face, she noticed just now that her mere presence smoothed out his usual frown.

She cleared her throat and looked back up at the ceiling.

"I'm not dancing."

Her words had a remarkable effect on him. He laughed.

"No?"

"No."

"Well, that's too bad. I'm hosting this event, which means I'll have to do the opening dance."

"I'm afraid you'll have to do it alone", Tav tutted, half turning away.

Gortash grabbed her right hand and pulled her back to himself.

"No", she whispered, "not in front of… everyone…"

"Baldur's Gate's finest men and women will see you with me tonight, anyway."

Shit. Of course, he was right. Tav wanted to run away, but Gortash led her movements as he wished, making her realise that following him wasn't that hard.

As it wasn't hard to follow him in every other thing he did, too.

"See? It's not that hard. You're doing it well", he smiled at her gently, making her heart flutter. "Just follow my lead."

Just follow his lead.

Hours later, on the way to the hall, she kept telling that to herself. Her hand rested on his lower left arm; the gold that covered his arms felt cold to her touch. As grounding as that felt, she'd never been more nervous.

"How are you feeling?" He asked her as they stopped in front of the door.

"I think I'm going to throw up", she admitted.

"You'll have to get used to this", Gortash moved his clawed right hand up to her face. She allowed servants to apply some makeup on her face, as well as tend to her hair, styling it into a decorative bun with several braids at the back of her head, so the back of her dress could be seen. Compared to Gortash's high collar at the back of his head, she looked more approachable, less dominant and less intimidating. Which was probably the whole idea. Gortash hooked his index finger under her chin and brought her closer to himself. "You need to see your subjects."

"I don't like to think of people that way", she murmured.

"That's what they will be. Our obedient puppets." As his clawed thumb ghosted over her lower lip, she faintly remembered that there was someone else who said those words, but his touches were distracting her mind. "Every time I look at you, I can't believe how lucky I am."

That finally made Tav smile.

"You flatter me, Your Grace."

"And you honour me, my dear." He pressed a soft kiss to her lips, and she felt like she'd melt at it. "Come. If you don't want to mingle on your own, just keep smiling and follow me. I'll introduce you to everyone important."

"Just one thing", she murmured before she reached up to his shirt. He frowned slightly when he felt her using the rope to pull it properly closed. "There."

"Was this absolutely necessary?" He raised a brow. "I liked it that way."

"At least have it like this now. We're seeing important people, after all."

"I've had it like that when I became the Archduke."

Tav tilted her head cheekily.

"You looked delicious like that, but I'm afraid if a lot of people are checking you out at that area tonight, I might become a vicious murderer."

"Oh?" He chuckled, moving his left arm around her waist to pull her in close. "I'll have to see that one day."

"Trust me, you don't want to", she warned him quietly, trying to ignore how the air between them changed yet again, positively snizzling with passion they both had to hold back.

"You'll have a long, long night tonight", he warned her, making her sigh.

"…is that the hilt of your dagger or are you just happy to see me?"

"You really need to ask?"

"Enver! Do we need to fetch a glass of cold water for you?"

They kissed, and they laughed in that kiss, feeling light and careless.

Perhaps it was too good to be true.

"Shall we get to it, then?" Tav murmured when they finally could break away from each other. "The sooner the guests leave, the better for both of us." She paused before she giggled again. "And your pants."

"My pants survived a lot more than this."

"Please, Your Grace. Let's go. I want that dance to be over, and it hasn't even started yet."

"Hmmm", Gortash hummed against her lips. "Say that little word again."

"Please, Enver~", she purred as seductively as possible, making him shiver.

"I never get tired of hearing that."

She repositioned herself on his left side, and they finally entered the room. The way every head turned to look at them made her feel like her legs were made of liquid. She'd never, ever do this again. She wouldn't allow him.

She hadn't done anything in particular as Gortash addressed the nobles, just stood tall and as confident as she was able to. She couldn't help the feeling in the pit of her gut that something wasn't right. The men and women around them drank every word of Gortash; they visibly liked him, so there was no problems whatsoever.

Then came the music and the thrice cursed dance.

She struggled through every second of it, even if she was trying her hardest to focus on him and no one else.

"You're doing well", he whispered to her, making her smile as he led her through it.

The tadpole in her skull squirmed anxiously.

This hadn't happened in hours, not since she'd left camp last night. The smile vanished from her face, and her eyes wandered around in the room as Gortash was spinning her once. The faces were blurry as her vision darkened at the pain as the tadpole squirmed even more, causing her a headache – someone was trying to get into her mind.

Close your mind, the Emperor warned her, you are in danger.

The panic was imminent. The Emperor had kept her safe ever since she fell from the Nautiloid, she had no reason not to believe him when he warned her. She felt it anyway; her tadpole wouldn't stir otherwise. She hadn't had her weapons with her, she felt as vulnerable as a newborn, especially in this dress, during a dance. The smile froze on her face as she paled, focusing to shut herself down from the intruder that poked around at the edges of her mind. She was trying to pay more attention to Gortash again, letting him pull her in close as they walked in a half circle, her hands between them, fingers entwined. Her expression made him furrow his brows slightly; he instantly knew something was wrong.

As soon as the dance was over and another song started which most of the guests started to dance to, he led her to one of the tables to get her something to drink. He couldn't outright ask what just happened; not yet, as the night was still young. He couldn't just disappear as they've just arrived. There were customs to follow.

Which led to an agonizing two hours of him introducing her to the good people of Baldur's Gate, during which her tadpole squirmed at the constant attacks against her mind. Someone really wanted to get in and look around in her brain.

Who is it? She asked the Emperor.

If I told you, you would scream.

Well. Good news was that there were several Steel Watchers around the room, and she was hanging from the city's most powerful man's arm. Surely nobody would try anything with the odds heavily in Gortash's favour, right? She was safe as long as she remained on his side and didn't lose him in the crowd.

And seeing her tight lipped, nervous smile and the sheer panic in her eyes, he would've been mad to let her get lost. He didn't only have her right hand hooked around his left arm, he even had his clawed right hand over hers as he spoke to others. To let her know that he really was there for her. To let everyone else know that she belonged to him and if anyone threatened her in any way, he'd destroy them without hesitation.

When it seemed they've met everyone, they glanced at each other. His questioning dark eyes met her slowly calming ones, and he was just about to ask a question when a silky voice spoke from behind them.

A silky voice that made her heart and breath stop.

"Archduke Enver Gortash? We haven't had a chance to speak, yet. I'd like to thank you for inviting me."

Tav nearly fainted. The edges of her vision blurred as she half turned to look at the man who addressed Gortash, dressed in the finest attire she'd ever seen on him; imposing, threatening, scheming in his entire being. Astarion was just as beautiful as he was on the day when he left her; her pale elf with his strong, piercing, crimson eyes and dangerous, sharp smile.

Hello, my sweet. He told her through their psychic connection as he locked eyes with her. Long time no see.

#Oathbreaker #little tyrant [enver gortash] #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg 3 #enver gortash #archduke enver gortash #lord enver gortash #fanfic #Oathbreaker fanfic

[pebblysand]

HERE WE GO! WELCOME TO THE PAGE PALS PROJECT! THIS IS YOUR CONVERSATION STARTER FOR CHAPTER ONE. FEEL FREE TO SEND IN ASKS OR JOIN THE DISCORD FOR MORE!

HANDY LINKS/INFO:

chapter: i. out of sand (baby girl)

wordcount: 10, 157

playlist: notes here

castles FAQ: here

g e n e r a l t h o u g h t s:

I felt very emotional, beginning this chapter. There is a sense of finality in this project that I hadn't quite grasped before. This is - in all probability - the last time I read this fic. This is the last time I read this chapter. A chapter I have read dozens of times in the past few years - every time I was stuck, every time I needed to 'get back in.' Most of these paragraphs roll off the tip of my tongue when I read them out loud, because I've seen them so many times. And, I know that for you, reading this, this might not be the last time. Because you will go back, re-read this fic as many times as you like for as long as the internet exists. But I won't. That's not how my brain works, and I need to put projects behind me. To make room for new ones. And, so there is a sense of excitement, yes, reaching the end, but also a sense of grief.

If everything goes well, and if I do post the last chapter when I intend to, castles will have been four years of my life, almost to the day. COVID came and went, so did a couple of jobs, a relationship, a parent. I recently listened to an interview from Alexandre Astier where he described meeting someone in a supermarket once, who asked for an autograph for her husband. 'Ah, he's a massive fan,' she said. 'Though, to be honest, I never got into your work myself.' He was talking about how, for 'normal' people, people who aren't artists, someone else's art is just that: something that you like or don't like. But, for us, it's a part of ourselves. It's thousands of hours of work. And, sometimes, I wonder what castles says about me. What these thousands of hours have come down to. If I die tomorrow, which I hope I do not, this is one the things that I will leave behind me. And, so: what does it say about me? I mean: beyond the politics and the feminism and the quirky little interests. I mean: me, as a person. What do castles readers know about me? I'm not sure I even want to know.

t h e r e - r e a d:

I really enjoyed re-reading this chapter. It's funny to me how for you guys, depending on when you started the fic, you might have read multiple versions of this. I didn't make any big changes, nothing massive, but I did add a couple of scenes/lines here and there throughout the years, I'm curious to see whether you will notice.

in terms of the chapter itself, i think one of the things i like most about it is how it flows. it has that very distinctive castles prose to it, with the timeline that moves back and forth, the run-on sentences, the spiralling in and out of scenes. i recently got a comment on ff.net (lol) that said the chapter was messy and unreadable. and i think in a way, i like that. because frankly, if that bothers you in chapter 1, then you're probably not the right person for this fic, you know? i think chapter one serves its function well. a first chapter is supposed to be an intro, a taste of what you will read next, and i think it is perfect in that. it introduces the plot, the dynamic between the characters. it's long enough to signal that this isn't a fic where you'll read fifteen chapters in half an hour. i think you can read chapter one and tell if this is a fic you'll enjoy or not. and, that's what i want, really. that's what a first chapter should do.

having said that, i think there are two things i want to specifically dive into.

t h e h y p o:

early in the writing of castles, i used to get a lot of criticism about my version of post-war harry and ginny. particularly, there seems to be a subsection of the hinny-shipping crowd that basically thinks that harry and ginny would just meet after the war, scream at each other (or, that at least, ginny would be angry at harry for leaving her behind), kiss and make up, and pour their hearts out to each other about past events. specifically, these people believe that ginny is very good at weeding secrets out of harry, at getting him to talk, and thus the events of castles are not canon compliant with both of these characters.

i feel like objectively, it's not really my place to say whether that's correct. i think multiple versions of the same thing can be 'correct' depending on how you write them. but, if that's what floats your boat, if you have a very strong headcanon about this, then fine - by all means, go read something else (again, that's also the point of chapter 1). but i think this hypothesis sort of stuck in my head for a while, in light of the comments i was getting, because i couldn't help but wonder if that version of things isn't simply an idealised version of reality.

because, to read the books strictly: 1) ginny's anger at harry isn't obvious. you could argue it is there but she's actually quite calm in the break up scene. i am not sure she is that angry with him, especially when you think that she's just been through a war, lost a brother, etc. i think ginny is someone who knows there is a time and place for anger, and who is also incredibly strong and resilient. she still kisses him even after the break-up, after he's clearly decided to leave her behind , so i'm not sure she would lash out in these circumstances. additionally, 2) there's actually not that much evidence that harry and ginny talk to each other - ever. they're a hot and heavy thing, but they don't share much emotional stuff on screen. you can interpret the 'sunlit days' however you want, in the absence of further information, but it's not a given that ginny ever shares anything of importance about her past or her traumas, like what happened with tom. the one scene everyone always points to is the 'lucky you' scene, but that's a mutual understanding more than it is a conversation. she actually never mentions anything beyond very utilitarian details meant to help harry realise he's not being possessed. and, harry never canonically tells ginny about anything of importance in his life either.

and so what all of these comments drove me to do, a few months ago (i think i added this in september 2023) was to link that to the theme of those early chapters of castles. because one of the key elements of chapters 1-3, specifically, is this idea of the lifeline. of the way harry and ginny have spent months, at this point, idealising each other, idealising their reunion, for it to later come crashing down on them. and so i thought i would use the opportunity of chapter one to 1) try and address the 'criticism' above, and 2) make it fit within the world of castles. it led to this:

In his head, their reunion would have been something sweet, like her lips moving against his, the taste of the raspberry-flavoured lip balm she used to wear the year before. He would have confessed to all of his sins, to almost dying, to Hallows and Horcruxes, to the fear and the nightmares, to leaving her behind. ‘I’m sorry,’ he would have said. ‘I am so, so sorry.’  And, he would have tried to explain like he did last year, that all he ever wanted was to protect her, to keep her safe, and she would have yelled. Shouted at the top of her lungs in a rapid succession of angry jabs about what an arsehole he was. ‘I can take care of myself!’ she would have thrown back. ‘You left me!’  He would have looked to his feet. With time, he hopes that they would have fixed it. In reality, though, Ginny Weasley hands him a toothbrush that morning, as he sits back on his heels. Her stare digs holes into the side of his face and he wonders if, had he been Hermione or Luna (had he been a friend, still), she would have cajoled him. Handed him a wet towel for his forehead. Instead, she closes the door behind her on her way out. ‘You should shower,’ she says.

i love the sort of whiplash effect this scenes gives, of the fantasy v. post-war reality, which is obviously a massive theme in castles. and i also love the way it subtly signals that ginny might have changed (just like he has) throughout the war. because, obviously, she has, and we later find out why.

s e x a n d f u n e r a l s:

i cannot express how attached i am to that scene, and to that line in particular. i think there's a number of reasons for this:

first, it's the line that basically motivated me to start castles for real in 2020. i have said this before in other posts but i started drafting some sort of post-war hinny fic as early as 2007. i never finished anything, then when i was 17 (2010), i did a re-read and actually drafted something new. then dropped it again. and, that file transferred from laptop to laptop, from file to file for ten years without me touching it much. until covid came and i was looking through my drive, and i tenderly read what 17-year-old me had written back then, including this 'first time' sex scene which, to be honest, has mostly remained untouched in the final version of this. and, i remember finding it, reading it, and thinking the rest of what i had written was a bit cringe, but that one scene seemed to work. and then, i got to the (now famous) line: to him, the spring of '98 is about sex and funerals, and thought fuck, that's a good line. like, a really good line. and i didn't want to let it go to waste. and, so, four years later, here we are.

i think that line is a very good symbol of what this story is about. 'sex and funerals' - it's a metaphor for how life is about the good and the bad things. that they co-exist as one single entity, and that the beauty of what we do, of the way we live, resides somewhere in between. it's why i chose it as the summary back then, and why it is still the summary now. i really built the entire fic around that line. so, yeah, 17-year-old jo, you already had something going for you, darling.

l a s t l y:

a thought i had while re-reading (and please don't come at me for this), is that... this could have been a one-shot. like, it really could have. i finished chapter 1 and there's a sort of finality to it, isn't there? like, i'm glad i continued this fic, but part of me thinks that all i've been trying to say in the past four years actually is in this chapter. obviously, not as detailed or subtle, but it's there, you know? it could have been a one-shot, lmao.

but anyway, i'm curious, did you guys enjoy your re-read? did you notice the changes i made throughout the years? did you enjoy them? feel free to send me an ask or join the discord server to discuss. i'm so excited to get this discussion started and hear your thoughts!

#castles #chapter 1 #and so it begins

[paintbrushnebula]

I'm researching some stuff about apothecaries and the history of the pharmacy, trying to find inspiration wherever. Chuck Jones always said to just read whatever you can to find ideas for your fiction making and stuff, so I'm just getting in on reading a bunch of history so I can come up with something to write

It's because I've been thinking about what life post-tower must've been like for Rapunzel. She's fresh off the heels of an abusive environment, now finding herself in a completely different place that she's unfamiliar with. She's only had a few hours to vibe with Corona's people, and that was when they didn't know she was the lost princess with magical healing powers. So here she is, having returned to them at last. And I find this idea interesting: what if many of them were kinda... disappointed? I don't know if I've expressed this idea before that I think Corona would really have to prove itself as an actually good environment for Rapunzel to grow in, and I think the answer would really be no, at first. There'll probably be this superficial way that the citizens of Corona all will see her. Imagine if Rapunzel had been sort of deified by the people in those 18 years? Imagine what that kidnapping had looked like to the average citizen? Your king and queen gives birth to a young girl who is now your princess, and oh my goodness! The princess has the power to heal the sick and injured! It's a literal miracle! The kingdom rejoices. Frederic and Arianna probably assume that they're celebrating the Queen's recovery and Rapunzel's birth, but it's more than that for some. They're celebrating their miracle. Plagues and illness and suffering and death will be no more. Then before a single soul can see this healing power, that miracle gets stolen from them. The kingdom is sent into despair. All the sick who were given the hope of being healed are now left to suffer fate's design. Plagues will come and death is here to stay.

In those 18 years, I bet there was a lot of praying for the lost princess to return, but not for her to be reunited with her family safe and sound, but for her to heal them and their own families. That hope for her return builds in the people's hearts, to the point where Rapunzel is now something of a messianic figure rather than a literal abducted child.

So now that miracle finally returns, except... it's not a miracle anymore. It's just a girl. And the kingdom's last hope that once grew from her head was now short and wilted (those aren't my words, I just feel like a particularly disgruntled Coronan would say that about Rapunzel).

Now imagine how that makes Rapunzel feel? That the kingdom shes supposed to call home is pretty much objectifying her similarly to how she's used to? And when you've only known one way of earning love your whole life, you're gonna stick to what you're used to if no one helps you actually learn different. Only now, Rapunzel can't offer herself the same way she did with Gothel, because she doesn't have her hair anymore. Now she has no way to give people what they want.

hnggggggg I gotta write this story someday

where was I? Oh yeah! So the apothecary thing. Yeah I was reading this article by Rachel Ewing for Penn Medicine, https://www.pennmedicine.org/news/news-blog/2017/may/then-and-now-the-healing-power-of-an-urban-garden. One of the lines in the second paragraph says "The plants themselves were therapies to be eaten or brewed into tea." What's being discussed is the history of herbs and plants being used for medicinal purposes, and that line in particular made my jaw drop for a moment because it made me think of Rapunzel, and how her being objectified by people into something of a medicine, or in the context of Tangled; a healing flower, rather than a person, is something she'll have to break past even after she's left Gothel's captivity.

#tangled #brushneb says stuff #tangled the series #Rapunzel #rapunzels tangled adventure #disney rapunzel #tangled rapunzel #Disney

[elfaery]

My mind is still processing yesterday's chapter, so what I'm about to write might be a total mess, but here's my take on it. 

In the past few weeks, we've been treated to two Tianshan kisses. More importantly, they are finally canon in the plot. I honestly didn't think we would get this far. In all these years, it never never crossed my mind they would kiss like this (in Mo's room, stuck together like magnets), which is a thousand times better. I thought we'd have to wait for their future for them to get official. And to be honest, if they weren't kissing at all during the whole story, it was clear as day that they were meant for each other and [anything that bluntly shows they are soulmates]. They could have just confessed their feelings to each other or shown that they are officially together in their future, but instead we got more from Old Xian: a kiss.

I personally thought at first their kiss wasn't really necessary to the plot, because we all know they will kiss at some point in their lives, sooner or later. I sound really stupid but I didn't expect to see them kissing at all. However I just forgot they already kissed before and it reminds me that a kiss can play a huge role in Tianshan’s development. And these last few chapters have also proven me wrong. First, the kiss is the best gift I could never imagined because it brings me an immeasurable amount of happiness. It makes me proud to see how far they came from. It makes me smile to see a consensual and passionate kiss from my comfort ship. It makes me happy to witness their intimacy and love for each other. And of course, the kiss itself is essential for both the readers and Tianshan. It impacts the reader's view of their future and, of course, it explicitly shows they are canon. It's a strong development for Mo and Tian too (I won't elaborate more on that here because it would be too long). I'm currently cringing at myself because Tianshan is the very first couple that made me goofy and made me write an entire paragraph about a kiss.

[Don't read the crossed out words if you're still emotional].

I can add that even though we had a kiss from Tianshan, there is still so much to unpack in the story, which is really wonderful. For the plot, we still have: Zhanyi's development, the anguish of the couple's separation, their future, their parents, She Li, other characters' backgrounds, the mafia part, Qiu Ge and He Cheng and more. Old Xian really managed to build a world with great settings and interesting characters, which are very promising. And these may also take a thousand years. 

To conclude my long rant, after seeing yesterday's spicy Tianshan, I am 100% sure that Old Xian has NSFW arts that will probably never see the light. I swear we will probably never see these treasures, but we can only imagine. Anyway, thanks for putting up with my nonsense, I was just confused the whole time and I still am. All of this just feels surreal to me. What a time to be alive!

#pls I’m so slow #19 days #mo guan shan #he tian #old xian #tianshan

[glorious-blackout]

I just finished reading "I'll See You On The Dark Side of the Moon" and my h/c heart loved it so much. Can I get the director's cut for that?

Also, I saw your tags on an anon post. I am also ace! I didn't think I'd run into any other ace Milex shippers here ❤️

Awww thank you so much! 💖 That story (and the whole Milex Big Bang experience) was very special for me so it always makes my day to hear from readers who enjoyed it!

I technically do have a 'director's cut' ending for this fic 😅 Because it was written and edited over a period of months, it had plenty of time to morph from a traditional psychological horror into a story that was more concerned with Alex and Miles's relationship and Alex's desperation to return home. This meant that by the time I got around to writing the first draft of the last chapter, the ambiguous ending I'd had in mind from day one was starting to rub me the wrong way, especially after the intensity of the events leading up to it. After a lot of internal debate and some feedback from my lovely friend who read the early drafts of each chapter, I eventually settled on a more hopeful conclusion which I still feel was the right decision.

Enough time has passed though that I'm happy to share the original ending for curiosity's sake - the only major changes were in the last few paragraphs of the chapter 😊

A soft thud rudely interrupts such pleasant fantasies.  

They break apart, rosy-cheeked and breathless, casting an eye over the bed until the source of their interruption presents itself. Miles’s battered copy of ‘The Restaurant at the End of the Universe’ has slipped from its perch and is now resting precariously against the bedrails, its pages splayed open and threatening to crease beyond repair the instant they hit the floor. Alex rescues it mindlessly - just in time to spare it from slipping through the gap - and brings it closer, recognising the neon imprint of the title from his childhood. 

Without really thinking, he flicks through the yellowed pages, glancing at the dense passages for only a moment before throwing the book aside, blinking away the faint stirrings of a headache. 

“You okay, love?” Miles asks, seemingly out of the blue, until Alex realises he hasn’t said anything since their untimely separation. He looks over at Miles, basks in his beauty in the sleepy morning light, and can’t quite bring himself to believe that he’s real. That he has chosen to spend the rest of his life with Alex of all people, when he could have anyone he wanted. 

“Kiss me again?” he asks, hoping that his desperation for reassurance is not as obvious to Miles’s ears as it is to his own. 

“You’re insatiable,” Miles chuckles, but his eyes are warm and his hand cradles Alex’s cheek with a gentleness that makes him want to fall asleep, safe in Miles’s arms. A persistent beep resounds in perfect time with the pulse drumming in his ears, and Miles’s eyes glance in the direction of the snitching monitor.  

“The nurses’ll be thinking you’re in trouble.” 

‘Oh I am,’ Alex thinks, but he elects not to mention it. Truth be told, he can’t bring himself to care, especially with Miles gazing at him as though he’s just unveiled the secrets of the universe. 

It isn’t long before Miles grants his request, kissing him with so much care and love that their surroundings melt into oblivion. Alex finds that this is a rather pleasant state in which to exist, and so he ignores his creeping exhaustion and the slowly awakening aches across his body in favour of letting his mind be consumed by the man he loves more than anything in this world and beyond.   

As he loses himself in the sweet taste of Miles’s lips and the pleasant burn of stubble against his cheek, Alex finds that he’s almost capable of forgetting the way Douglas Adams’s words had danced maniacally across the page, defying all attempts at comprehension. 

Almost. 

#I was also planning an epilogue which would have shown more of Miles's perspective during the events of the fic before ending - #- with Alex ultimately coming home and them starting their new life together #(Brian the Squirrel would have made a cameo of course 😉) #unfortunately I never managed to find the time to write it #also yay fellow ace Milex shipper! 💖 #my writer brain just loves complex and interesting relationship dynamics even if I can't always 100% relate to them #my writing #milex fic

[letstalkloz]

It's Been a Year: Let's Talk This Blog

Hey everyone, it's been awhile! Sorry for not keeping up with all of the Legend of Zelda news we've gotten in the last year since I last posted. This post will just be a quick run down of where I've been, and what my future plans are with this blog. So let's talk about it.

Fun fact about the creation of this blog: This whole thing started as a project for my Writer's at Work class. It was a class designed to teach us English majors about different careers and writing styles we could pursue after graduation. Our first lesson was over blog posts, and since I was already a long time tumblr user, I figured I would create a blog around my number one obsession: The Legend of Zelda.

Even though my love for the series has not diminished, I will say my relationship to this blog felt weirdly professional. Every post I made was for a grade, and there was certain criteria I had to meet. In the end, I passed the class and earned my degree as well as two writing certificates, but I didn't know what to do with my newfound freedom when it came to posting here. So between a small blog-identity crisis, writer's block, and my laptop breaking, I left this blog to rot.

When one of my friends managed to fix my laptop a few weeks back, part of me wanted to come back to this blog and continue posting. The problem was I didn't know what to post about. Nintendo must've realized my struggle though, because we have gotten quite a bit of news regarding Tears of the Kingdom recently.

So now what? I still have my original list of posts that I wanted to make, so while we wait for Tears of the Kingdom to drop, I'll be editing and posting some things that never made it past the first draft stage. Once I get the game in my hands, I will likely be live blogging important moments from my personal gameplay, as well as sharing my opinions on the game itself. The Twilight Princess manga is also just released it's final part, so once I get my hands on a copy of volume 11 I will be posting about that manga series as a whole.

Long story short, I miss this blog and I am excited to return and continue posting about my favorite series. I am also looking forward to posting in a format that I prefer, instead of following guidelines put in place while I was in class (5 paragraph limit, researching topics, etc.). Expect a lot more rambles, more frequent posts, and whatever else I think of.

#let’s talk #the legend of zelda #loz #i'm back bitches

[windowsandfeelings]

18, 19, and 25 for the writer’s ask please!

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end. Spicy addition: Questioner provides the passage.

She wakes up warm. Cozy.

He’s drifted to her side of the bed in the night, the way he does, and wrapped himself around her. She’s not so much the little spoon as silverware tucked into a fancy folded napkin. But it’s comfortable. She sinks into it, barely awake at all. She thinks she could stay here forever, drifting in and out of sleep. Until where she is, when she is, clicks into place in her consciousness.

“Elephant!” she pulls herself from Jess’s arms, nearly bolts out of the bed, across the room. “Elephant! Elephant!”

“Wh—Ro—what’s…what’s going on?” He’s not awake yet, not really. She watches as he rubs sleep from his eyes. His hair is sticking up all over, just the way it did back in high school when he styled it that way intentionally. But this isn’t high school.

This is Philadelphia. Maybe 2011? (Yes, the chair they bought at that second hand place in New Hope, the one they put in the corner and then piled with clothing for six months instead of ever actually reading in it, is nowhere to be seen. Definitely 2011.)

OK so this is the beginning of Met You at the Right Time chapter 5.

When I started writing the story I absolutely did not know that Rory and Jess had been together during the ~lost years~. The idea for the fic started when I was rewatching Nick & Nora/Sid & Nancy last fall and thought "what would have happened if Rory had bailed with Jess?" (Which @rorygilmoregf brilliantly explored recently!) I think that then turned into "what if Rory had a chance to do it over again?" and then the basic premise started to come together.

I don't remember exactly how I reached the idea that they'd been together between season 7 and AYITL, but when I did it it felt like a missing puzzle piece for the story (that and the realization that whatever Rory changed shouldn't have any sort of lasting affect on the story—once I knew that the central message was going to be "you can't change the past, you have to take the present and go from there" I unlocked so much about Rory's character/journey).

And then I had the image of Rory waking up in Jess's arms, realizing where she was, and yelling "elephant!" at him, and I was so so so so impatient to actually write it. It sat in the chapter 5 section of my google doc, all by itself, for a long time until I could really dig into it. I think that image was actually what prompted the idea of them having a time-travel code word (and the code word was going to be "eggplant" until the emoji thing came to me).

As far as how it changed...the only specific thing I remember is that the metaphor in the first paragraph was originally something about being chopsticks in a sleeve. I changed it to silverware because I thought it fit better with the little spoon/big spoon thing, and the specific image of being "enveloped" that I was trying to convey. Also, figuring out how to write it to accurately convey: a) what was happening, b) when it was, and c) that it wasn't something that had changed, just something we didn't already know about, was tricky. Hence the bit about the New Hope chair (and, a few paragraphs later, the Shins t-shirt).

19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start? Why did you start? Were there bumps along the way? Where are you now and where are you going?

I feel like I've been writing forever. I know I wrote my first poem when I was 7 (it was about love at first sight, and yes, I can still recite it), and I started writing stories around the same time, but I learned about fic when I was 13, and after that my writing was kind of compulsive and constant for a long time.

I got a creative writing minor in college (and picked my school because they had the largest undergrad writing prize in the country...which I did not win). After college, and especially when I got my first office job, I definitely slowed down a lot. I tried my hand at writing other things (criticism, mainly), but I wasn't really writing fiction (or poetry) anymore.

I started taking TV writing classes a few years ago, after I moved to LA (my not-so-secret heart's desire is to be a TV writer), and I was writing a lot up until Covid hit, but then I lost my motivation. I didn't really start writing anything again until I got the idea for MYatRT, and script writing is still on the back burner. It's not that I don't want to be a TV writer anymore, but my actual career has recently taken off in a new direction that I'm genuinely excited about (and not just for the big raise and fancy title that came with it), and I think as I've hit my mid-thirties some of my priorities for the next 5-10 years of my life have shifted. Trying to launch a completely new career (especially in such a hard-to-break-into field) just won't fit with the stuff that's more important to me right now.

BUT: I intend to keep writing in general. Fic, for sure. Maybe a novel, if I can find the right idea. Writing is never not going to be a part of my life.

25. What is a weird, hyper-specific detail you know about one of your characters that is completely irrelevant to the story?

Man, I am really struggling to answer this one (aside from my answer yesterday). I think a lot of what I know generally ends up in the story somewhere (or in multiple stories).

#writing ask meme #met you at the right time

[hero-deserves-to-be-happy]

hihi! same anon as last time, wanted to leave my thoughts on the latest chapter ^^

something I notice, this taking place earlier on in the timeline than the other pieces in the series (of which I've reread a fair few times! hope that isn't an offputting thing to admit, I just really like your approach to these characters :D), is how lonesome and subdued he is at this time. I particularly really like that second paragraph listing off everyone's wishes for him that we've seen up to this point (and noting his parents' hpes too really sits with me- gosh, how worried they'd be for him over the past few years...) and I like as clumsily they go about it how determined his college friends are to cheer him up in some regard. even if they don't know the extent of hero's struggles, they invite him along and want him to have a good time too. it's for their benefit too but it's still sweet to see

my heart hurts for him in that stretch of them trying to sell him on playing the romance game, what a subject to navigate... I'm curious what CJ and Kyle took away from his mood slipping alongside his admittance of having been kissed, if anything. guess it'll be a wait and see :o

and even though as you've noted this is largely set-up to the party itself, I really like the hopeful note you close out on here. the smallest choices, little moments of courage, really add up. you just have to see where they take you, sometimes.

great work with this!! I eagerly await more however and whenever it works out, and I send my well wishes to the two of you- hope you both have a lovely day!! - 🩶

Oh my goodness! 🥺 Thank you so much 🩶Anon-Friend! Your ask was so sweet and means so much to us, especially after the struggle it has been to get this set of chapters ready for posting. It made our days to get to read your thoughts on the latest chapter! Thank you so much for taking the time to share with us!! 💖

Before we address your lovely specific points on the newest chapter, we wanted to reassure you that there is not and is never anything off-putting in reaching out to us and in telling us you have reread our little stories. It is so incredibly flattering to hear that not only did you give our fics a chance and enjoy them but also that you loved them enough to reread them. It's so encouraging and honestly has us tearing up a little! 🥺💙Seriously, it's the greatest compliment to hear that you were so impacted by something we created that you wanted to read it more than once. Do you have a favorite story in the series so far? (No pressure to answer, of course. We were just a little curious).

Thank you also for saying that you love the way we write the characters! We both love OMORI and all of its amazing, dynamic characters so much (Hero especially) so it is always our goal to do them justice whenever we write about them. To hear other people enjoy our interpretations and it's not only us who see these characters in this way is always so encouraging. Thank you so much for that!

Thank you again for supporting our “When Sun Shines Again” project and for reading our latest chapter! We apologize it was short and that not a lot happened (that's why we didn't have our word of thanks to you in the author's note. We were always planning to put it in the next one where things actually happen & apologize for the delay 🙈). After several months of writing and rewriting, editing and reediting, however, we decided to post some of it (if only so Acacia would stop editing and finally move on). It means so much to hear that you enjoyed it! We've addressed your specific points under the cut (because this post got really, really long), but thank you so much again for such an incredibly kind ask! We appreciate you and your support so much. Please take care of yourself and we wish you a fantastic day as well! 💙

Honestly squealing a little that one of your big takeaways from this chapter was how lonely Hero is at this point in his life. We tried so hard to make that a major theme in the work thus far, so it means a lot to hear that that stuck out to you especially in comparison to stories that take place farther in the future. One of the biggest inspirations for this story has always been this line from One Day Left:

Hero really is so lonely, and it goes beyond just the loss of the best friend he had in Mari. He can't open up to others in the same way that he used to. He feels he has to protect Aubrey, Basil, Sunny, and Kel who are dealing with their own grief. He is terrified of worrying his family, and he struggles to tell any new friends he makes about his painful past. He doesn't show anyone the whole picture anymore--doesn't show those broken parts of himself. For any relationship to truly develop, there has to be a level of vulnerability, a moment where you allow someone else to truly see the real you. Hero doesn't want is anyone to see him anymore. By never letting anyone in, he thinks he is preventing himself from ever hurting or burdening others, but what he is really doing is preventing himself from ever being truly loved.

What was more important to both of us in writing this series wasn't that Hero opens himself up to romantic love again but that he opens himself up any love: to the love of his family and friends. We want him to allow people to know him, to see him, and to love him again, so he doesn't have to be alone anymore. We want him to heal his relationships with his old friends and his family, but also to open himself up to new friends too which is how the cast of this story became so much bigger than just one OC love interest. Yes, it's the name of the blog but we truly believe that Hero deserves to be happy and it's our hope that that he can find that happiness in building meaningful relationships with people who truly care about him (even in a purely platonic sense).

Hero's family & friends know and wish this too (in our opinion) which is why they are worried and why they want so desperately for him to make friends at school. It means so much to hear you specifically mention that second paragraph of this chapter where Hero thinks of his loved ones' wishes for him. [A/N: Sprinkles wants to specifically thank you for mentioning Hero's parents and how deeply worried they are about him as that's something that (we both feel) often gets overlooked or misinterpreted so it means a lot to hear that that really struck you! Always excited to find fellow "Kel & Hero's Parents are flawed (as all human beings are) but they genuinely love and care about their kids and are trying their best" Truthers out there!] All those wishes were all intentionally included in the previous chapters to build up to this section of the story and everything that comes after because Hero building these friendships, finding this sense of community, and opening himself up again is one of the most important themes of this story.

And in that way, you're absolutely right about Hero being much lonelier at this point in the timeline than in the other stories in this series. From the beginning we've had this detailed outline/timeline of the "When Sun Shines Again" universe and when we [A/N: mostly Acacia who has a bad habit of wanting to write out of order] work on spin-off stories, we tend to have a specific point on the timeline in mind to set that story in. It's so encouraging to hear that there is such a noticeable difference in how lonely Hero is in this early part of the timeline than in the later ones when he has cultivated these friendships and allowed himself to be vulnerable with them. That vulnerability is really the key. For instance, you mentioned Kyle and C.J. and their reactions to Hero's unexpected shift in mood, and the real issue for Hero there is that he can't explain because he isn't ready to open up about Mari yet. Eventually when/if he is ready to tell his friends about her, those kinds of misunderstandings will become less of a problem.

We loved what you said about his friends being determined to cheer him up a little bit. That's exactly what we were going for! And it means so much to us that you've mentioned Kyle and C.J. specifically here as if they are real characters. We worked hard on them so it really means a lot! Eventually they will learn at least some things about Hero's history and Mari (not sure if that's a spoiler or not), but despite them (especially Kyle) being goofs, they really do care about Hero and would be a lot more sensitive if they knew his past. In that way, it's kind of a good thing they don't know because the rest of this story kind of depends on them being a little more pushy (at least to the extent of getting Hero out of the house to this party, but more on that in the next chapter...)

We apologize for that the sadness in that bit about poor Hero remembering Mari and their relationship and kind of swearing off romance forever. We were kind of worried it would come off as a random tangent (even though we know/hope it'll be relevant later), but ultimately, we decided to keep it if just to reiterate the point that Hero is absolutely not ready for that right now and is not going to be ready for a long, long time (which I'm sure you know if you've read the other fics in this series). We actually kind of had to laugh about it the other day because we are now 43,805 words into this story and Hero hasn't even met the girl who will eventually get him to open his heart to love again. As Sprinkles says, "This takes slow burn to the next level."

But we feel strongly that it has to, just by the nature of what it is. Hero loved Mari so much. He wanted to spend his forever with her and genuinely cannot imagine ever wanting that kind of relationship with anyone else at this point. To gloss over that or speed through it really feels like a disservice to him and to how deeply he loved Mari and is still grieving her. Finding healing and opening his heart again is a very long, complex, and often painful process. It can't be rushed, and thanks to Sprinkles who insisted we turn this story idea into the proper epic it deserves, hopefully it won't be here (A/N: it was originally only supposed to be 5 chapters spanning the same length of time but just in less words/scenes, but Sprinkles wisely decided we needed to let the story breathe and take its time!)

Lastly, we are so thrilled to hear that you liked the hopeful ending of this chapter and the reflection on the small seemingly insignificant moments in life that have major impacts. We absolutely agree with your analysis that sometimes we really do have to see where those little moments of courage take us (and we absolutely adore the poetic way that you've worded that too). That's always been such a big takeaway from OMORI for us especially when we think about how (arguably) the most important part of the game (those Real World segments) are sparked by the seemingly insignificant choice to go outside with Kel. If the player chooses to ignore Kel's knocking, they'll end up in Hikikomori and the "True"/Good ending will be impossible to them which in a way (or at least in our opinion) makes it the most important decision in the game. But it's so deceptive precisely because you don't expect the most important decision in a game to be opening the door for your friend. We wanted to bring that kind of sentiment into "When Sun Shines Again" as well and emphasize these little moments that end up having huge impacts on Hero's life and his future.

You've probably guessed by the amount of music references in "When Sun Shines Again" that we have found a lot of inspiration for this series in music, and there is a song called "Something Changed" by Pulp [YouTube Link (A/N: The song title is the Spotify link)] that perfectly sums up this sentiment (A/N: Acacia listens to it a lot while writing). It's this love song from 1995 (so appropriate for the time period here) that's really about "perfect timing" and how it's not these little moments that bring these people together. The song is really the singer reflecting on these seemingly insignificant moments that unexpectedly changed his life and how he wasn't expecting to find love but somehow everything just fell into place and "something changed." Here's a few of our favorite lines:

"Oh, I could have stayed at home and gone to bed I could have gone to see a film instead You might have changed your mind and seen your friends Life could have been very different but then Something changed"

That's probably a good wrap up place before we start rambling about spoilers (not sure if you care too much about those, but we've tried to avoid them just in case 😅). We're hoping to get the next two chapters wrapped up and posted this week. We have no idea if this is even possible but we're going to try. (Acacia is determined to get poor Zoey into this book by her birthday so wish us luck!). The encouragement and feedback we've received from you is such incredible motivation to get these chapters finished and posted though, so thank you so much for that and for all of your support!

We are so delighted that you've enjoyed our stories and are so humbled and flattered that you think so highly of our "When Sun Shines Again" series. Merely saying thank you does not feel like enough, but thank you so, so much for this! Please don't hesitate to stop by our inbox any time to talk with us. We're always happy to discuss this project, our OCs, or anything Hero related (honestly, anything OMORI related within our blog rules really even though this is a Hero-centric blog), so please don't be shy or a stranger. Sending much love to you, 🩶 Anon-Friend!

#thank you so much for this #we're in tears #it means so much to hear you enjoyed the most recent chapter #🩶 Anon-Friend #You're so lovely you're getting your own tag now! #when sun shines again ⛅ #when sun shines again commentary #hero songs #hero character analysis

[ihatetbrlists]

The Reading Diaries #7

Fearful Symmetry, by Gailie Ruth Caress

From my TBR? Yes.

Minor spoilers ahead.

Reader, be warned: I am obsessed with Pride and Prejudice Variations. I once read 70+ of them in one year. And I'm not even counting unpublished JAFF. Fearful Symmetry is the first I review on this blog but it certainly shan't be the last.

Ok, now onto the book itself.

The premise is simple: what if Longbourn was destroyed by a fire right after the Netherfield Stay? A lot of drama, that's what.

I usually like my P&P Variations quick and angst free and this doesn't fit the bill exactly, but it was a good Variation all the same! Usually, Variations set in the aftermath of the Netherfield Stay tend to conclude themselves by the Netherfield Ball but this one dragged on until Rosings, which I felt was a little unnecessary. They could have solved everything a long time before that but I have the feeling that the author couldn't let go of the dramatic resolution she had imagined.

There was some angst, in the form of the Bennets' precarious economic situation after basically losing Longbourn to the fire but it's not major.

Also, Darcy and Elizabeth didn't spend nearly enough time with each other. Where are the nighttime clandestine conversations in Netherfield's library that I'm so fond of? Is that just me? Ugh, whatever.

The writing felt a little over-flowery at times. I almost DNFd the book after the first few paragraphs but I soldiered on and now I'm glad I did. I loved the bit about palm reading and scars. It was the highlight of the whole book for me, it felt very meta but also super sweet (you'll get it once you read it).

All in all, not my favourite P&P Variation but it has its charm.

#bookblr #booklr #book review #fearful symmetry #gailie ruth caress #pride and prejudice variation

[oh-hawkeye]

I'm so angry I don't even wanna scream.

MOST OF MY EPISODE ANNIVERSARY DATES WERE WRONG AS HELL!!!

I MADE ALL THE POSTS WITH WRONG DATES PIVATE so that they don't misinform anyone.

I'LL FIX AND MAKE THEM PUBLIC AGAIN WITHIN A FEW DAYS.

I'm sorry :(

[EDIT: changed "max. 3" to "a few" (days)]

I knew when was the first episode aired and after that I assumed they were aired every week. I WAS SO WRONG! I don't know how I could make that mistake.

I'M THREE EPISODES AHEAD and MOST OF MY POSTS TAGGED "this moment appeared on TV exactly 50 years ago" ARE WRONGLY SO!!!

I've made gifs for 11 of the first 17 episodes and only the first two are tagged right. All the posts past E05 are dated wrong.

I have to fix it somehow, and I will, but I don't even know how.

[under the cut I'm not longer angry, but sad instead, and I explain why that matters and why the reason it matters to me so much isn't as crazy as it can seem]

I'm not sure how I'm going to fix this. I'm so angry!!!

I tried so hard to make those gifs on time, often failing, very often rushing like crazy to manage on time, more that once making it literally the last minute, doing all the posting manually because the queue couldn't handle the accuracy I needed.

I tried so bad to make the perfect anniversary blog/celebration. I wanted it so much that at times the struggle to keep up took the fun out of it.

I'm not doing this because I'm such a die-hard MASH fan. I'm not obsessed so much that I needed the anniversary celebration to be perfect for the sake of it. I came up with it because the idea itself seemed so cool, and the opportunity was too good to miss.

At the same time it seemed like a good idea to do something MASH related (other than watching the same episodes over and over) to keep me interested as it's too easy to lose interest in something if there's no new content to fuel the excitement.

That's why I care about everything being on point even more than I would if it was only the matter of celebrating the anniversary. I'm doing it for the sake of the form even more that I'm doing it for the content itself.

<this paragraph was deleted - turns out I was wrong about the repetitions of calendars - the episodes were aired on Sundays and the 50th anniversary is on Saturdays>

I've just relised that means that most of my posts are/will be (I'm counting also the episodes that I didn't post yet) wrong. MOST OF THEM.

That basically means I didn't post my gifsets on the scenes' anniversary as a rule. I made them so sometimes.

That means that the whole idea failed. If at least a bare majority was right I could say that the project is full of shortcomings, is hanging by a thread, and is terribly flawed but it is at least accomplished. And this? This is just an incomplete collection of draft notes.

I was so excited about this idea, and the fact that someone with a popular MASH blog told me they think that the idea is "cool" and "fun", and that "that extra effort is admirable" (about posting on the exact anniversary of the scene) made me feel sppreciated, and even more confident it's worth the trouble.

And now what?

I have to find a way to manage the mess, as fixing it is impossible. Then I'll have to make up another tags for those posts that were originally tagged as on time. Then I'll have to change all those tags, which will be the most annoying and time-consuming part, as the mass editor can only do so much.

I have to think fast, as I can't stand the fact that almost all my blog is a lie...

I know it's just a silly internet thing, and I'm too old to care about such things, but I really feel like crap.

I could really use cheering up. Any attempt at that will be greatly appreciated, even if I doubt anyone will even read it. I'm not popular enough (actually not at all) for people to care about me spilling my guts on a fandom blog.

However if you read that through this all - thank you! My non-mash posts are usually not being read, and I think people would prefer me not to write at all. So if you do - thanks again :)

#thoughts around mash #I'm getting personal #me blogging #mash 50th anniversary #mash anniversary #mash blog #m*a*s*h blog #mashblr #mashposting #the posting snafu of 2022 #posting snafu

[altmusicposting]

Chasing Lanternflies: Voices of New Brunswick's Youth

Last Sunday, local non-profit Hidden Gems Literary Emporium (which also doubles as an art gallery) hosted an open mic night that doubled as a launch party for the locally curated zine Chasing Lanternflies. 12 people total performed, mostly people sharing poetry, rap, or short story excerpts they had contributed to the zine.

For those unaware, zines (pronounced "zeens") are small-circulated, self-published works that include writing, art, and sometimes other activity/information/interview pages. They are typically made for and/or by a particular group. They originated among the geek (science & science-fiction) and punk communities, and are traditionally low-budget, and DIY in production and appearance. This zine was a bit more professional looking, but still stayed true to the roots of being of and to a particular audience. The contributor and coordinator, Kenia Hale (seen below on the right) described it as "a love letter or an artifact to the people [she] met here," and wanted to capture what its like to be a young person in this place and time.

In the next few paragraphs, I will review each of the performances, referred to as "acts"; however, I would like to note that regardless of any criticisms I may have, I acknowledge that it takes a rather large amount of chutzpah (courage) to present your work live, especially if you have little experience with it. On the whole the performers did quite well, and the environment was extremely supportive, with loud applause after every act, no matter how short or apprehensive. Additionally, I would like to note that one of the owners and co-founder of Hidden Gems, Kaila Boulware Sykes (seen below on the left), made a point to give each performer a book she specifically chose for them at the end of their reading. Not only do I love this idea, but I think it well illustrates the environment and community that they cultivate at Hidden Gems.

*Note: All name spellings and pronouns are the best I could surmise from introductions, as I did not get to talk with all of the artists*

Act 1: Vivian- Going first for anything can be daunting, and on top of that it appeared that she didn't have much experience reading live. She sped through her piece and was somewhat difficult to understand at times. That being said, her piece was humorous and heartfelt, and I quite enjoyed listening to it.

Act 2: Sydney, stage name: Anja Muse- A very confident speaker, she performed 2 powerful and punchy spoken word/rap style pieces. Themes included black bodies and their relation to themself, self-love and acceptance, and taking back power/voice/love. The pieces themselves made use of rhyme, dry humor, consonance, assonance, and some double entendre. Sydney's delivery was clear, and showed intentional phrasing. Apparently a seasoned performer, she held the audience captive, and even earned a few outbursts of agreement for some lines, which they left space for.

Act 3: Trevon- Performed a spoken word piece that was very solidly grounded in location (New Brunswick) and vivid, concrete imagery. In contrast to this, there is a strong sense of pondering and mental wandering. The performance was good, but not particularly unusual/noteworthy. The writing itself was beautifully aware of sound, with alliteration, consonance, and assonance being prevalent.

Act 4: Gianni- This was more of a quick bit of info about the piece of art she submitted. It was a picture of a mosaic tray she made for her mom's birthday. She mentioned how she wanted to take inspiration from her Hispanic heritage, and shared amusing imagery of having to hide it from her mom while living in the same house. Timid in public speaking and discussing her work, she didn't go into too much detail.

Act 5: Shelly- Wrote a piece for the zine entitled "Flora and the Lanternflies" that was inspired by the zine itself and her friends. She read an abridged version of sorts, but did not give away the whole story. There were sharp transitions between locales that gave the impression of flashing vivid memories interrupting the main character's view of the forest in front of them. There was also an intriguing bit of tension between the innocent/dreamy quality of one setting with the sad and imperfect/harsh quality of the other. Shelly seemed fairly confident in her performance, and made an effort to distinguish this as a live experience by playing a forest soundscape in the background as she read.

Act 0/5.5: Truth, the young toddler son of Kaila was drawing throughout the show, on himself and paper apparently. His on-paper art was shared with us. Mostly abstract scribbles, which makes sense as I think he's about 2-3, but they showed an affinity for color fields that would probably make some abstract artists proud.

Act 6: Isa- The only musical performance of the night. She was going to sing with a backing track, and when it failed opted to just do it acapella. She did so wonderfully, with remarkably accurate pitch and a beautiful natural rasp to her voice. Her vocal style seemed to include some short clipped ends to lines. One of the people who was vocal in her encouragement throughout the night, and someone who spoke loud and clear on stage, it was evident performing was not new to her. This was unsurprising as it was mentioned that she was the singer for the local band Speak Easy. She also had 2 short poems that she shared, one personal and one about climate change. Both were visceral and gritty like her singing, and I personally loved them.

Act 7: Suzie- She read 2 poems, both of which were full of tactile imagery and unusual similes and metaphors. There were clear but dueling narrative voices, one cute/innocent, and one more adult/serious. What I really enjoyed though was that she altered her spoken voice to match the switches in narrative tone, resulting in a sense of embodiment that added greatly to the reading. On a separate note, she also unintentionally/subconsciously dressed like a lanternfly, which didn't really have much bearing on her performance, but was a fun little detail.

Act 8: Fatua- Also read 2 poems, both emotional poems about love and hardships, and assigning meaning to things in life. I regrettably was not able to get down the full first line for her poem "Don't Give Me Flowers", but I remember hearing it and just going "damn that was a good line." For her first time reading her work to a live audience, she did very well. She spoke mostly clearly, and didn't rush through her pieces, taking time to explain a little before reading them.

Act 9: Ianna- She shared a single piece entitled "Ode to Body", and took the time to explain some of her history with the piece, and how it was something she had tattooed onto herself as a physical reminder/manifestation of it. She also asked the audience to close our eyes for her reading so as to pay more attention to our own physicality and presence throughout the performance. She put a lot of passion into her reading, and she had a tendency to draw out the length of some words to emphasize them. It was a clear ode to oneself, one's body, and to owning one's power.

Act 10: Ashambue- A published author, and 3rd generation New Brunswick resident, he read a couple poems/raps from his book "Am I a pessimist?" There was a clear emphasis on rhyme and flow and feeling, with themes focusing on day-to-day struggles of life in America nowadays. The second poem he read had a clear and apt extended metaphor of racism in America as an abusive relationship. Clearly comfortable speaking/performing, he was intentional in his phrasing, and unafraid to talk about his history and experiences.

Act 11: Karim- His pieces focused on themes of masculinity and femininity, life as a queer black man, and loss. He seemed a bit unsure of himself/anxious about performing, but spoke well. His performance voice differed from his normal speaking voice, and had a round, full quality to it that emphasized the gravity of his writing. That combined with his use of even, almost hypnotic cantor, and direct but beautiful language legitimately gave me chills at one point.

Act 12: Kenia- Closing the night, the curator of this whole endeavor shared an excerpt of the short story she submitted to the zine. A speculative fiction piece that centered queer love and the idea of both separated and found families/community, it blended imagination and science beautifully. The general premise seemed simple but interesting, and the scientific aspects seemed well-researched. She was another person who seemed mostly comfortable performing.

Overall, it was a pretty cool night, full of lots of different perspectives and voices of young people in a true Hidden Gem (pun absolutely intended) of a location here in New Brunswick.

#writing #my writing #my thoughts #punk #poetry #spoken word #voices #new brunswick #people of color voices #lgbtq voices

[btshodown]

With Eyes Wide Shut

↳ A Halloween movie marathon is in order when you find Jungkook shyly asking about your plans for the night. Although, it seems as if lines are getting a bit blurred and you decide that for just this one night you’ll keep your eyes wide shut. 

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader Genre/Warnings: A super fluffy and sweet cake that somehow makes you sad, Staff/Chubby Noona Au Word Count: 2k+

➭  Happy Halloween! This totally isn’t late at all Anyway yeah, please enjoy this baby of a drabble that I started while at work. This one is in the same AU as the Yoongi and Jiminnie one. I’ll probably go back into my masterlist and create its own section.  Its up now under the OT7 category <3

“Noona, are you going to dress up for Halloween?”

At hearing the youngest call to you, you turn around to face him, momentarily pausing your work of arranging the 7 costumes. You blink your eyes at him and purse your lips in thought, glancing down at the red Power Ranger helmet in your hands. Normally back home all you would do on the holiday was simply decorate your studio apartment and buy a big bowl of candies for the Trick o’ Treaters; passing the night with boozy hot chocolate and scary movies. You rarely went to parties and couldn’t really remember when the last time you actually dressed up was.

Now that you moved countries and worked at Bighit, you hadn’t even spared Halloween a second thought. Too busy helping out with what the boys needed and getting their costumes arranged for their yearly Halloween dance practice.

“Probably not,” you answer after a second of silence with a shrug, “I was thinking of just going home and watching movies honestly.”

You watch with fond amusement as Jungkook slightly pouts at your answer, no doubt hoping to hear your costume idea and possible plans. Usually at least half of the boys would do something for the holiday, whether it was going with friends or amongst themselves, but from what you had heard, the youngest wasn’t going anywhere. With a twitch of your lips you gently go back to arranging the outfits, half of your body still turned to the maknae.

“Did you want to join me on watching scary movies and munching on snacks Gukkie?”

You try your best to bite back your giggle when you see him startle from your peripheral, witnessing his ears begin to go a little red.

“I – can I?” His voice is soft and his words were slurring from his obvious nervousness; you also had to swallow down your squeal from how adorable he is. “It’s just…the hyungs are going out or staying at home, but I don’t wanna be alone. B-but I also don’t want to impose –”

Your small chuckle cuts his rambling off as you place a gentle hand on his hand, stopping his nervous picking of his nails. “You’re not imposing since I invited you Gukkie. Don’t worry about it okay? I haven’t spent time with you lately so it’ll be a nice way to catch up.”

Your heart squeezes in emotion as he unleashes his wide, happy smile on you, nose and eyes scrunched with his bunny teeth in full display. You had a soft spot for all of the boys, but there were no lies in the youngest being able to endear just about anyone; Jimin being right at his neck with his charm. Having both of them come at you with their smiles was lethal to your heart and you always swore they’d end up killing you.

“Thank you so much noona! I can’t wait for it! I have so many movie ideas too!”

You continue your work as you listen to him list off the different movies he has in mind, chiming in with your own agreements and additions. It was hard to not get excited about it when you had him practically bouncing from giddiness and it only made you wish the next week would pass by quickly.

Excitement bubbles in your stomach as you put the final touches in your living room, not wanting to admit that you may have gone a little overboard with decorating for your movie marathon with Jungkook. Orange fairy lights gently fall above your couch and over the glass of your TV stand, giving off a soft glow that complimented the tiny pumpkins you spread out. An assortment of chips, popcorn and candy fill your coffee table as you finish pouring out some boozy hot cocoa into some Halloween themed mugs; just in time it seems as you hear your doorbell ring.

You try your best not to skip over to the door and take in a breath, pushing away the thoughts of how long it’s been since you’ve celebrated Halloween with someone else, only thinking of how much fun tonight will be instead. With a determined nod, you open the door and greet the younger boy with a grin.

“Right on the dot, hey Gukkie,” you step aside to let him in, watching him with curiosity as he shuffles in shyly with a large backpack, hands clutching the straps as he looks around your decorated apartment with wide awe filled eyes. “What do you got in the bag Guk?”

“Oh!” Jungkook comes back to life as he animatedly swings the backpack around to his front and squats down, rummaging through it until he takes out two articles of clothing. One pair you realize is his Cooky pajamas you’ve often caught him wearing in their filming and the other was a Cooky one piece, the hood adorned with the characters eyes and floppy ears. “I uh, I remembered you said you wouldn’t dress up so I thought maybe…we could kinda dress up together? You don’t have to! I just thought…yeah.”

Your lips slowly stretch out into an endeared grin as you watch him shuffle timidly, his slight nervous slur coming back as he doesn’t look you in the eyes, too busy staring holes into the one piece was no doubt brought for you to wear. There was no denying the rapid beating of your heart from trying to contain your cooing and sudden need to squish his cheeks; he had no business being so fucking adorable when he was a damn 21 year old man.

With tentative hands, you reach out to take the pink onesie from his fidgeting hands and offer him a kind smile when he peeks at you from under his dark fringe. “I think it’s a great idea Gukkie and I kinda wish I had thought of wearing pj’s if I’m being honest,” you pause as you grin slyly at him, holding the onesie to your chest, “is there any reason why you got me the Cooky one specifically?”

His eyes widen a bit at your question and you can’t hide your soft snort as his cheeks get a bit pink, his hand coming up to pick at the baby hairs on his cheek before he tries his hardest to come off as composed. “Because Cooky is the best one, duh.”

Letting out a soft laugh you shake your head and motion to the bathroom, before turning around to go into your room. “Of course, how can I forget? The bathroom is over there if you want to change while I go change in my room. If you finish before I do, just start picking out the first movie.”

You didn’t even need to look behind you to know the maknae dutifully nodded his head and quickly took off his shoes before heading to your bathroom. Now your only problem is wondering how you’ll fit in the onesie once you close your door, frowning softly at the material. You have no doubt that this was the onesie Jungkook owned, the scent of it alone was a clue were it not for the obvious size difference. Deciding to ignore the fact that he gave you his own onesie as opposed to getting a new one, you keep a light camisole underneath and trade your jeans for spandex shorts, knowing that later on you’d end up getting hot in the suit.

A sigh escapes you once you have the onesie on, staring at your reflection with a frown as you see the way the buttons on your chest are barely holding on and the ones on your stomach seem tight, but the sleeves and pants are comically long. Before your thoughts can take a one way ticket to the Depressed Bitch train, you pull the hood over your head and quickly look away from the mirror as you walk out your room. You’re greeted with the sight of a snuggly looking Jungkook cross legged atop your couch, with a ps4 controller in his hands as he flicks through the different scary movies provided. Your mood instantly lifts again as you waddle over to the young idol and can’t help yourself from smacking him softly in the face with the long sleeve of the onesie, practically cackling as he sputters out in surprise. But before he could whine at you for hitting him with the sleeves of his onesie, he stops short as he really takes you in.

“Wow, you look really cute in my onesie noona, you look so small.”

It was your turn to feel your ears get hot, thankful for the hood as you flop onto the couch beside him, smacking him with the long sleeve again as you pull your mug off the coffee table and into your hands. “Stop trying to flatter me, I know I look stupid. Just pick a movie Gukkie.”

Jungkook pouts a bit, but decides to not argue on how wrong you were and instead goes back to his choices; eventually deciding on the ever classic Friday the 13th. With his own mug of boozy hot cocoa in his hands and a bowl of popcorn balanced in his crossed legs, your marathon begins; mainly you hugging your throw pillow for life and Jungkook laughing at you when he wasn’t absorbed into the TV. The night rolls along and before you know it, it’s past 2 am, Insidious is playing and you nearly let out a shrill scream when you feel something heavy land on your lap.

Instead, you swallow your scream and only jump a bit before looking down to stare in confusion at the dark head of hair now resting on your lap. It takes a few moments to process that the head on your thighs is Jungkook’s and he must have fallen asleep at one point, gravity doing the rest. Your belly warms at the sight and before you can stop yourself, your fingers begin to thread through his soft locks, while the other hand is quick to click out of the horror movie and back onto the main screen. Not having the heart to wake up the maknae, you grab your phone and type of a quick text to the group chat to let the rest of the boys know the youngest member would be sleeping on your futon tonight.

After turning off your console and TV, you begin to gently try and move Jungkook over so that you can turn the couch into the futon, but a sudden pair of arms around your waist prevents you from even moving. Glancing down, you realize with a start that sleepy doe-eyed eyes are staring into your own and Jungkook apparently had woken up sometime during you trying to move him.

“Can we sleep like this?” his voice is soft and full of sleep, but at seeing you pause long enough to show your hesitation, he quietly adds, “Please?”

Despite how close you are with the boys, there is no doubt an invisible line you do not and should not cross; any feelings that weren’t professional and amicable were always a slippery slope and something your superiors frowned upon. Even if it meant feeding into emotions that were being given to you, but in spite of knowing this and trying your hardest to not cross that line, you’re not sure how you somehow managed to suddenly be in Jungkook’s arms. His mouth is dangerously close to your ear as he nuzzles his nose into your hair and his legs easily tangle into yours, the attempt to take out the futon long forgotten as he slots your bodies into the small couch.

The night is soothingly still as you close your eyes, trying your hardest to ignore how at ease you feel despite the red alarm blaring behind your lids; there was no use in stressing out about the blurred line, not when Jungkook held you so close to his chest as if cherishing a moment that would never happen again. You both knew that the moment the light of the sun spilled through the cracks of your curtains, this small moment being shared would have to be shattered, never to be known outside of your small apartment.

“Thank you noona,” his voice is only a breath against your ear as his arms tighten around you more, as if trying to erase any remaining space that may have been between your bodies.

Your only response is a gentle flutter of your lips against his jaw, not a kiss or peck, but just the simple touch of your skin against his; something that could easily be mistaken for imagination come tomorrow morning.

#Jungkook #Halloween drabble #Noona au #Jeon Jungkook #Kookie #bts #Fluff #Jungkook fic #I know its not even Halloween anymore #But porfis #Pretend for me as if I wrote this yesterday #Also I'm crying in the club #This wasn't supposed to end this way #But damn if #it didn't write itself after the last few paragraphs #If you think there is something there #Then you right #But if you think its one sided #Then you also right #Basically idk wtf is going with this either #lznsbgjksfajdika

[sukunasun]

sorry but nanami in ur ivy league bf geto …. please..i want him so bad. im going to think about this until i die

please...save yourself...those little nanami crumbs have all of you in a chokehold...ever since i posted ivy league geto all everyone wants Dr. Kento, N. Ph.D. i didn't think he'd get this much attention it was only a few paragraphs too omg...

and you know what, i bet he'd be so smug about it too...he's sitting comfy somewhere in a leather chair sipping tea knowing he's hot shit. "just call me nanami," he'll say despite having multiple doctorates—even with that too, he'd think it wasn't a big deal, "it's not necessary to have so many qualifications, i just happen to be a man dedicated to research and knowledge...as hesiod said, moderation is best in all things.." humble bragger that he is. wouldn't walk around with a high nose, he doesn't try to win every argument like geto nor does he rub it in people's faces the way gojo does, but he'd definitely correct someone when given the chance. and they can't bring this guy anywhere, gojo takes him out to a club and nanami has brought a book to read. geto can't stop laughing because the stripper asks if she could take a peek at it, batting her eyelashes, pushing her tits up just a little and he's like "sorry, but you're not permitted to, this is for staff only." with the most monotone voice.

he isn't invited to dinner parties either because he ruins trivia night by correcting the game itself. "the great wall of china isn't actually visible from space," he says, and he's always winning these things by 100 points more than anyone else.

and let me just say that he isn't going to be your perfect professor who's so charming and attractive and smart and dreamy, that's what everyone thinks until they actually meet him and learn that nothing gets pass this man, he's so straight-laced he's borderline repressed, "oh can i do anything for extra credit?" they say, trying to be seductive, trying to be sexy and it doesn't phase him. he just thinks they're willing to do more work so he sends them off to do more things, write more essays, take more tests, do more research, do a side project, and they have to say bye to whatever little bit of social life they had left. (but kudos to him because he hates group projects as much as his students, and he won't care about ratemyprofessor reviews because all of them, all of them, are either horny, hateful, or asking for a fight, yuuji leaves the sweetest words of pure joy and gratefulness—'one time he let us play kahoot for a whole hour because he had a hangover and he let me move his slides for him during a talk. i love you nanami sensei! <3' and nanami doesn't even know about it)

yuuji likes him so much and this kid is able to see the good in everyone, which is also why nanami is able to really help him out when he needs to, "you're getting distracted during your explanations, elaborate but don't overdo it, you're meant to bring focus back to your proposed statement." when was the last time someone actually found his critiques and feedback worth something.

and he's awkward okay? he's spent years studying and he always just had a little bit of trouble making friends, like geto and gojo were there because the three of them share the burden of being the smartest, being gifted, gojo's a prodigy and geto's family have a history of being philanthropists, they have been in and out of college before turning twenty and nanami never had the time for a romantic relationship, his only wingmen are the Worst at picking up women, how is he meant to flirt with anyone, and you think he doesn't care? man cares too much! he listens to meet me at our spot on repeat after bad dates because he thinks he's going to be alone forever, spins around his office in the dark as he finishes all that expensive whiskey, and everyone knows that he's been dumped because he stuffs his face full of bread and carbs everytime it happens.

ugh he wants a family so bad, he's so sick of the same old routine and he just wants a break from all of it. can't stand going home to the same old empty apartment, empty bed, empty fridge. he wants a hot meal and a cheery voice greeting him the moment he steps past the threshold, a gorgeous woman who would massage his aching shoulders, let him pick at her insightful brain, and sleep in with him on the weekends. "i became a husband," he replies when asked what he's most proud of and it makes your heart swell, he surprises you like this all the time, he blows your mind because you don't expect it, you wouldn't think he'd adore you the way he does, something so...selfish? just wants you to himself, won't have you visiting his office because he will eat you right up on his desk. it's always the introverted ones, the quiet ones, but nanami is a whole other type of his own. the kind that whispers the dirtiest, filthy things in your ear before he eats you out like he's been craving for it his entire life, hungry and sloppy, his tongue inches deeper and deeper. "i won't fuck you until you've cum three times", he doesn't know when to stop because all he feels is that he should keep going, do a good job, prove to you that he's so capable, that he's more than just his academic accomplishments, he wants to be seen as a man, as a partner.

#i love the love he's getting #but its exactly what he wants..he wants yall to suffer #also..i saw the way he bragged about black flash dont tell me he isnt doing the same with his titles #when will i actually give nanami a happy ending #ask #anon #sunpiece #jujutsu kaisen #jjk fic #nanami kento #nanami kento fic #nanami kento phd #ivy league au #nanami kento hcs #nanami hcs #nanami x reader