#it just sucks so bad.

[palms-upturned]

.

#meg talks #abt to head back into work #the start of a long fucking week #last time i tried to go back to work i literally collapsed on the ground from how tired and sick i was #if anything it feels like im just getting worse now #my nerve pain is so bad #and my coughing fits make me see spots #at least i don’t have fever anymore and the congestion isn’t as bad #i can breathe okay #but god. im scared that this will be my new baseline #which will mean that i can’t work here anymore… #and it’s just too early to tell. it could take weeks to get my full strength back and i might be fine #but that’s weeks of wondering #and trying to muscle through #which could be making things worse. fuck if i know #i want to quit so bad but at the same time i don’t want to. i don’t want to be muscled out #it just sucks so bad. #and they let this happen to fucking ten out of fifteen of us all at the same time #they really don’t give a shit about our lives #they can always just replace us with cheaper labor.

[5weekdays]

they gotta give me more enrichment at work look what i just doodled

^ joke that would have killed in 2011

🏳️‍⚧️ this post has come out as trans 🏳️‍⚧️

#i was so proud of walter’s typing quirk that i didn’t remember to make his last name six letter #this sucks. anyway #breaking bad #homestuck #EDIT: I MISSPELLED CAPSAICIN DON'T LOOK AT ME #SECOND EDIT: a transphobe reblogged this so i just want to reiterate that all my posts are transgender #so if you enjoy my posts thanks for being an ally 🫡

[inkskinned]

so one of the things that's so horrifying about birth control is that you have to, like, navigate this incredibly personal choice about your body and yet also face the epitome of misogyny. like, someone in the comments will say it wasn't that bad for me, and you'll be utterly silenced. like, everyone treats birth control like something that's super dirty. like, you have no fucking information or control over this thing because certain powerful people find it icky.

first it was the oral contraceptives. you went on those young, mostly for reasons unrelated to birth control - even your dermatologist suggested them to control your acne. the list of side effects was longer than your arm, and you just stared at it, horrified.

it made you so mentally ill, but you just heard that this was adulthood. that, yes, there are of course side effects, what did you expect. one day you looked up yasmin makes me depressed because surely this was far too intense, and you discovered that over 12,000 lawsuits had been successfully filed against the brand. it remains commonly prescribed on the open market. you switched brands a few times before oral contraceptives stopped being in any way effective. your doctor just, like, shrugged and said you could try a different brand again.

and the thing is that you're a feminist. you know from your own experience that birth control can be lifesaving, and that even when used for birth control - it is necessary healthcare. you have seen it save so many people from such bad situations, yourself included. it is critical that any person has access to birth control, and you would never suggest that we just get rid of all of it.

you were a little skeeved out by the implant (heard too many bad stories about it) and figured - okay, iud. it was some of the worst pain you've ever fucking experienced, and you did it with a small number of tylenol in your system (3), like you were getting your bikini line waxed instead of something practically sewn into your body.

and what's wild is that because sometimes it isn't a painful insertion process, it is vanishingly rare to find a doctor that will actually numb the area. while your doctor was talking to you about which brand to choose, you were thinking about the other ways you've been injured in your life. you thought about how you had a suspicious mole frozen off - something so small and easy - and how they'd numbed a huge area. you thought about when you broke your wrist and didn't actually notice, because you'd thought it was a sprain.

your understanding of pain is that how the human body responds to injury doesn't always relate to the actual pain tolerance of the person - it's more about how lucky that person is physically. maybe they broke it in a perfect way. maybe they happened to get hurt in a place without a lot of nerve endings. some people can handle a broken femur but crumble under a sore tooth. there's no true way to predict how "much" something actually hurts.

in no other situation would it be appropriate for doctors to ignore pain. just because someone can break their wrist and not feel it doesn't mean no one should receive pain meds for a broken wrist. it just means that particular person was lucky about it. it should not define treatment.

in the comments of videos about IUDs, literally thousands of people report agony. blinding, nauseating, soul-crushing agony. they say things like i had 2 kids and this was the worst thing i ever experienced or i literally have a tattoo on my ribs and it felt like a tickle. this thing almost killed me or would rather run into traffic than ever feel that again.

so it's either true that every single person who reports severe pain is exaggerating. or it's true that it's far more likely you will experience pain, rather than "just a pinch." and yet - there's nothing fucking been done about it. it kind of feels like a shrug is layered on top of everything - since technically it's elective, isn't it kind of your fault for agreeing to select it? stop being fearmongering. stop being defensive.

you fucking needed yours. you are almost weirdly protective of it. yours was so important for your physical and mental health. it helped you off hormonal birth control and even started helping some of your symptoms. it still fucking hurt for no fucking reason.

once while recovering from surgery, they offered you like 15 days of vicodin. you only took 2 of them. you've been offered oxy for tonsillitis. you turned down opioids while recovering from your wisdom tooth extraction. everything else has the option. you fucking drove yourself home after it, shocked and quietly weeping, feeling like something very bad had just happened. the nurse that held your hand during the experience looked down at you, tears in her eyes, and said - i know. this is cruelty in action.

and it's fucked up because the conversation is never just "hey, so the way we are doing this is fucking barbaric and doctors should be required to offer serious pain meds" - it's usually something around the lines of "well, it didn't kill you, did it?"

you just found out that removing that little bitch will hurt just as bad. a little pinch like how oral contraceptives have "some" serious symptoms. like your life and pain are expendable or not really important. like maybe we are all hysterical about it?

hysteria comes from the latin word for uterus, which is great!

you stand here at a crossroads. like - this thing is so important. did they really have to make it so fucking dangerous. and why is it that if you make a complaint, you're told - i didn't even want you to have this in the first place. we're told be careful what you wish for. we're told that it's our fault for wanting something so illict; we could simply choose not to need medication. that maybe if we don't like the scraps, we should get ready to starve.

we have been saying for so long - "i'm not asking you to remove the option, i'm asking you to reconsider the risk." this entire time we hear: well, this is what you wanted, isn't it?

#where's the word woman in this u might wonder if u suck #good news i am nonbinary and have a uterus so that is something that can happen #im also gender fluid tho which means im immune to certain psychic damage bc if u call me a woman i'll be like <3 okay <3 #writeblr #the tightrope of ''ppl need access to this'' #and like also #''what the fuck is going on over there'' is like. so difficult as an activist #i was <3 punctured <3 during mine #and almost bled out on the table :) they didn't have anyone standing by bc it's ''just a little insertion'' #so i started crashing and i vaguely remember apologizing for the fuss as i heard my heart rate monitor start going <3 tachycardic <3 #she wasn't even a bad doctor tbh #ps btw the reason i even HAD a heart monitor is that i have a genuine heart condition and they knew GOING IN that there was a chance #i'd crash on the table #like my heart just likes to do fun little tricks and <3 stop working <3 (i do not want to discuss the specifics ty i am okay im ontop of it #and they were like 'oh u will be fine' and then she did do a puncture thru my uterus . pop! #and im sitting there dizzy and feeling my heartrate start to drop bc it feels almost. beautiful. like. the whole ground just #woosh! out from under you. and shit is like grey's anatomy. i'm looking up at her grey eyes #she's old she wears this nice shawl she's like got Cool Lesbian vibes and people are sprinting into the room #from other parts of the clinic unrelated to me. while the monitor is like a little aria singing #and shes like hey youre okay stay awake stay with me something went wrong we have to keep trying #and i remember thinking - i was trying to think of nice things. i have so many beautiful places that now overlap #with this terrible memory #i became dimly aware that there was too much on her wrists and hands. like #that was too many liters #and then when they had finished all this. i packed up and drove myself home #i have had (bad thing) happen to me. and the same feeling happened after #that numb almost lamblike bleating. you cry without noise. like. ur body is so shocked and ur mind so empty #you just stare at the road and everything everything is happening behind glass and static and you are standing so far away from it #while you hold ur hands at 10 and 2. and something in ur brain is SCREAMING at you - IT WAS BAD AND IT SHOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED #and ur just watching the alarms in your body going off and youre thinking. a little pinch! ha. i think i just lost something important.

[trans-androgyne]

I feel a lot of belief that “trans women obviously have it worse than trans men” it comes from assuming men & women are opposites & that their experiences must be opposite as well. As in, if trans women experience one thing, trans men must experience the opposite—but that’s not how it works in practice. Trans women are demonized and sexualized doesn’t mean trans men aren’t as well. Trans women feeling less safe after transition doesn’t mean trans men feel more safe. And transmasculinity being considered disgusting mutilation doesn’t translate to the opposite for transfemininity! I just wish we would stop comparing experiences as though they can be quantified & pitted against one another.

#not in all cases of course it’s just something I noticed a lot in whipping girl #she kept making claims about transmasculine experiences on little to no actual evidence to contrast with transfem experiences #to support the idea that trans women don’t just have it bad - they have it THE worst #that’s been my experience with the book so far at least which sucks bc I went into it really liking Serano and being excited #transandrophobia #transphobia #intracommunity issues tag #mine

[alpacacare-archive]

the brainworms are kiiling me. have a dad and son 👍︎

#papyrus #gaster #dadster #undertale #theres still not enough papyrus and dadster content where sans isnt present compared to the other way around #what will be enough you ask? well idk the exact amount cus numbers are infinite but yaknow #gaster supports let papyrus say fuck day #i believe he just sucks at parenting so papyrus cussed his whole life #and since gaster found out about the holiday papyrus has been nothing but encouraged by his dad #mostly out of spite towards the people who still believe his son to be 5 years old #im sorry i saw someone refer to papyrus as a prec**s cin***on ro*l and had to do something #my shoulder hurts so bad and drawing and typing worsens it and i have an exam tommorow i need to rest it for and look what im doing. #being silly. #>:[

[qqueenofhades]

For anyone who might catch themselves, as I just did, going down an especially bad Doom Loop: it is Sunday night AND the end of Daylight Savings. Whatever terrible thing your brain is telling you at the moment should probably be totally ignored.

#hilary for ts #daylight savings sucks etc #but yeah i just caught myself in an especially bad Doom Loop #thought about it for a second #and went...yeah that's why #so consider this your official permission to do the same

[ohno-the-sun]

Sol

#I’m just gonna put these here so I can rant about all the issues I see in the #so like I as an idiot was like let’s see if I can do a style study on qwille using my favorite boy right #but qwille a brain works in mysterious ways cause like I’m trying to hard to firgure out how they know where to put stuff #and of course the rendering is like that in between fully rendered and that more soft vague #which is gorge #but my brain when I do it is like you need to fix you need to fix this looks bad you suck blahblah #not to even mention the anatomy #which is completely fucked here #I can’t do shoulders to save my life #and he looks so dumb sitting on that box #like what’s wrong with his shoe #I know something’s wrong #I think I need to take a moment #I’m caught in one of those logic loops rn #blahhhhhh

[vellichorom]

✨🐀🥩 RATSHMEAT 🐀🥩✨

#uwu art #Spooky Month #Spooky Month 5 #Spooky Month 4 #Spooky Month 3 #Bob Velseb #Dexter Erotoph #RatMeat #Spooky Month Bob #Spooky Month Dexter #scopophobia tw #scopophobia cw #// ask to tag #THAT'S ALL. RATSHMEAT #IN VARIOUS FORMS #they're the worst my friend n i have been pairing them off together because they just suck so bad #KIND OF ICONIC TOO BEING THE ONLY KNOWN HUMAN ANTAGONISTS ( besides the cult ) INNIT

[each-uisge-enthusiast]

the modern villainisation of demeter will never cease to enrage me bc it wasn’t ENOUGH to just take a story of a girl being torn from her home from everyone who loved her and dragged away to be forced into marriage and twist and corrupt it until it was a romance story about female empowerment that wasn’t ENOUGH they HAD to take the original hero of the story the mother who went to every length to find her daughter again to bring her home and demonise her character until she was this horrific overbearing unloving mother. overprotective controlling without love. they turn the story of her grief at her YOUNG daughter being torn from her without her knowledge into the story of a misunderstood bad boy and a horrible cruel mother who won’t give him a chance and i really find it sickening. it’s ironic, that the ever misogynist age of hellenistic greece, has a better grasp of how disgusting and horrifying this situation was that a modern, self proclaimed ‘feminist’ era.

#ovids version made me cry #imagine you’re just a nymph watching your friend torn away from you by the literal king of the dead #and despite knowing how powerless you are against him you still choose to stand up to him #to stand up for your friend #imagine being so torn apart by the grief of losing her you weep yourself to death #imagine turning that story into a good girl/bad boy romance #weird #anyway #the story of persephone is personal to me #bc i wish my mother loved me like that #demeter was a good mother #you all suck for portraying her as anything less #idc if you disagree #‘oh myth is open to interpretation and reinterpretation’ #okay. well i don’t care. #there’s such thing as bad interpretations #making demeter the villain is a bad one #making hades a misunderstood protagonist is also a bad one

[hai-nae]

meant to post these sketches a few days ago? a week? but, well, life.

#red dead redemption 2 #my art #my fics #arthur morgan #rdr #rdr2 #rdr2 fanart #young arthur morgan #and a wee little hs of wolf!arthur #today is the first day of the last 3 ive gotten to eat more than a single meal a day #my bp dropped at work n since it was a vision black out i had to post up in the friggin stall like batman on a ceiling so i didnt fall #which sucks since i have a manual labor job but luckily i didnt reach the shakin stage just kept gettin the dots n focus static #been sleepin n readin to avoid attention on hunger pains since i had no energy for drawin #finally got to have dinner last night since we got some money and i gotta say i dont miss the feelin of chokin on food i wanted so bad #man i love tags most ppl dont read em n i get some catharsis to vent in em

[sadmages]

Gods work hard but Matt Marja works harder

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #astarion ancunin #lae'zel #shadowheart #gale dekarios #bg3 tav #my art #matt marja #SOMETIMES BEING A CLERIC IN THIS GAME IS JUST…… #man these gods really suck…..not mine tho <3 yay <3 #im almost done with his playthough so. thinking about him . #Matt sucks so bad. I love him so much #you guys dont even know about his fake moustache

[guinea-pig-enthusiast]

A comprehensive guide to my mindset when I play Minecraft:

Dig holes in the ground overnight to hide from the mobs. I cannot fight at all, and this is the only strategy I have.

If I ever get lost (which is very often), I am not able to use the environment to find my way around. My only option is to not dig a hole at night and hope I remember anything about where I respawn.

There is nothing intuitive about crafting recipes to me. I can make crafting tables and glass. Guess what I build my houses out of. Guess.

I saw someone say that enderpearls are "really good in the early game". Absolutely hilarious. My "early game" is three years in the making, and I don't even know what diamonds look like in-game.

Message my friends about the progress I'm making! I got a lot of cheers when I played for like twenty hours over the course of the week to find iron.

(I was actively looking for Iron the whole time.)

What the heck is an enchantment?

There are chests everywhere full of junk that I'm sure will be useful later. As long as I remember it's there. Which I won't.

Punching fish may not be effective but it sure is fun

I can't fight any mobs, but I have never won against a spider. If I see a spider, I either run or perish.

I like to look up inspiration online by seeing what other people build! It's always way out of my skill range, and I never will actually be able to imitate it, but it sure looks nice, doesn't it?

Google "where do I find x?" because I only know the location of dirt, and then I do not understand the coordinates system thing that's happening when I find the answers.

Marvel at the squid(?) creatures. Man, they sure know how to swim.

I never know where I am.

What even is the End? I went to the Nether once I think, but I'm pretty sure y'all are messing with me about the End.

If I see coal, I am filled with the sudden need for torches. It does not matter how many I have, I can always have more.

Marvel at the beauty of the pigs.

Half of my inventory is pickaxes. Just in case I get stuck in another cave.

So. Biomes, amIright?

I think I'm being lied to about redstone there is no way that is real

#minecraft #mineblr #the three years is not consecutive btw. i do not play constantly and still suck #i play constantly for a week and then forget about it until a new season of hermitcraft. rinse repeat #to everyone who is just so bad at minecraft but loves it anyways: i see you. i don't understand how roofs work.

[skunkes]

something silly and badly formatted

#a doodley #long post #sorry... i usually just draw freely on canvas then try to fit the drawings into wherever they fit once im done #but i like working with the space i have available and squeezing everything in...doesnt make for the best reading format tho #there's like 5 different art styles here and they all suck. my copium is i wanted to do this quickly #instead of spending so long on each drawing #but whenever i do this i just end up feeling bad about how Bad my little quick doodles are LOL #whatever ! #i wanna say i promise i can draw better than this but that might not be true #im embarrassed by how long this post is 😭 i might edit it to all be under a read more. im Shy. #comic

[latimeria-fell-from-heaven]

i just saw the quote "no guillotine can take away the head im about to give him" used in a mike thirst edit and , that is so true, nothing would be able to pull me off that pathetic wet wipe of a man

giving mike schmidt head is.... an experience. he's so tired and exhausted from working night shifts that he can't even really do much with your mouth on his dick. he can't move as much as he'd like, but he groans and even whimpers as you take him all the way down your throat. he's a pretty good size, the kind of size that's decently big but not big big to where it hurts to suck off. he cums a good amount, but the first few times you sucked him off he came quite a bit bc of how pent-up he was <33

#lati thirsts #mike schmidt x reader #mike schmidt smut #you ever just wanna suck a dick so bad

[beatcroc]

there's no way the bathroom at peppino's pizza is actually that big but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . hey ummm anyway.... i care them...... anyway there's a lil ramble on my take on fake pep's like psyche or whatever in tags on the og post if ur into that kinda thing :y

hey! it's a series! fake peppino world tour: [noise] [noisette] [peppino]<- u are here [gustavo] [gerome] [noisette again]

#ramble after realtags yeag. shoutout to serrangelic btw suggesting the silhouettes thing bc i would have Died otherwise #pizza tower #peppino spaghetti #fake peppino #gustavo and brick #arting #pizzaposting #so anyway i think fake peppino has like. a general awareness that he is supposed to Be Peppino and that he was Made to do that #and likewise he does generally try to...do that. the thing he does NOT realize is hes like really goddamn bad at it #not to be mean but like...c'mon. they are pretty distinctly different kinds of guys even beyond the physiology yknow. #he's neither on-brand nor fooling anyone dsjdsjjkgfsd. BUT! #since the rest of the cast generally likes him [at least as I play it] he thinks hes doing just fine #he's like 'oh they r happy with me so i must be getting a good grade in being peppino :)' #so getting told that 'yeah you actually really suck at that but that was never the reason people liked you' #and told that by og model peppino no less--yknow THE guy he's supposed to be living up to #who's already a bit intimidating for that and who ALSO totally wrecked him TWICE in the tower #making him acutely familiar with just how formidable the guy is and how much there IS to live up to.... #it's a Moment for sure. not really a sad or hurt one though. just... contemplative. #thinking abt people liking him for being the guy he's already naturally been being even though that guy is Not Peppino #i don't think he's gonna be super broken up about realizing he has a bad grade in peppino given everything else hes got now #nor do i really think he cares enough to go like reinvent himself or whatever after the fact #he seems to b pretty clearly having fun with it already so i think he just keeps doing that #and in some cases he still has the pre-installed peppino traits/instincts like to cooka da pizza. and that's fine #is this projection. yes. but if youve been following me awhile you know most of my character writing is ghdhfdgf #gonna kinda expand on all this in the gerome one which is...one after next. itll be a bit but man. #anyway peppino will never admit to anyone and especially not himself that he's gotten a little attached to the guy. hee hoo #pep tends to be kinda surly but he certainly has his ways of showing he cares. all of which are on display here #''that thing is not my son'' says man currently watching thing's antics with the 'bemused dad' arms crossed pose. yeah ok buddy. #gus is totally onto him already but hes not gonna say anything. #if u read all this ur prize is not having to go decode fp's rot13. his lines are ''meant to be you...?'' and ''wrong question.''

[sludgeware]

inspired by real events

#sludgeart #mspaint art #art #my art #marina ida #falin touden #bridget guilty gear #reisen udongein inaba #gigan godzilla #coach z #jay eazy #dungeon meshi #guilty gear #homestar runner #touhou #splatoon #shrimp #transgender #clarification i have nothing against people shaving their legs if you want to do it its fine i just think leg hair is awesome #also i have to shave my legs because of sensory issues and it sucks so bad i hate the earth #my commissions are open btw. in case you wanted stupid bullshit like this