#it will be because someone forced me

[shoku-and-awe]

I must not take House of Leaves in my carry-on. The urge to take House of Leaves in my carry-on is the mind killer. The urge to take House of Leaves in my carry-on is the little death that brings total obliteration for my already injured back. I will face this urge. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past, I will turn the inner eye to see its path, and where the urge has gone, there will be nothing. Only the 200 fucking pages I have left shall remain.

#this book weighs over a kilogram #i am not thinking rationally #but if i actually succeed in leaving it my checked bag #it will be because someone forced me

[shivunin]

Because I have just seen this specific thing for the second time, I would like to say:

If I reblog your art, I do not expect you to reblog (or share!) my fic in return

If I comment on your fic, I do not expect you to comment on (or read!) mine in return

My enjoyment of anyone's work does not come with strings or expectations

My friendship is not a bill that you will have to pay later

That's it!

#the fucking obsession with fandom becoming ~content creation~ has got to stop. this is not a business. #i don't like it when someone acts like i owe them because they complimented my work #and i will never do that to someone else #kindness has to be freely given or it isn't kindness; it's manipulation #this just. makes me feel super gross and it upsets me that it's happened twice #and that both people explicitly stated in their profiles that this is an expectation they have of fandom #you can't form a community by force. that's not how it works. #anyways. rant over. i just want it to be known that i'm not expecting anything from anyone lol #if i talk to you or hang out it's because i want to. i don't want anything from you except you know #kindness and companionship or w/e #bleargh. gonna go play a game or something. #dixeram

[marzipanandminutiae]

Of course, the burkini ban is messed up on grounds of religious freedom and racial discrimination. But also

Under any other circumstances, people would be HORRIFIED at a government mandate that women have to show a certain amount of skin. Like. That’s fucking dystopian, and the absolute opposite of feminism. If a government tried to pass a law that all women had to wear tube tops and miniskirts to go outside, people would rightfully be up in arms demanding blood

But because it’s targeting a marginalized religious group, many folks are lauding the blatant forced sexualization of women. Appalling

(apparently the ban also outlaws things like sun – protecting bathing suits if they cover too much skin. Which like. Yes, let’s give everyone skin cancer just so we can spite a religion we’ve decided to hate. Sounds like a good plan </s>)

#mini rant #Religious discrimination #misogyny #feminism #sexualizing women #islamophobia #I was just thinking about this in terms of the “women fought not to have to dress like this #that I’ve heard once or twice in reference to my own historically – inspired wardrobe #and how much I would absolutely hate it if someone tried to force me to show more skin in public #for me it’s an annoying comment here or there. For Muslim women in France it’s actual legal discrimination #I swear we’ve gone from people measuring flappers’ swimsuits on the beach #to make sure they covered enough. to police forcing women to strip #because they’re covering too much. We just can’t fucking win #especially women from marginalized racial or religious groups

[wispscribbles]

late but

Happy Valentine’s Day 😌

Thank you Chloe !! Happy late valentines :D This is a great opportunity for me to share some 141 valentines wips that I didn't finish in time

#ask #chloe-is-slightly-epic #these are so dumb i just wrote the first things on my mind #tbh only sharing these because I love mini gaz falling from the heli #the price one is a mw19 quote for those unaware #Someone: so how did u spend valentines day? #Me who just drew cod all day: ..... uhhhhhhhhhh. with my loved ones #task force 141 #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #kyle gaz garrick #john price #cod fanart #my art #doodle

[tbgkaru-woh]

Having fun with MDZS's clan "uniforms"/ dresscodes

there are still hierarchies and some individuality in these that i will follow for the main cast, this is more like "place your OC here" lol

#mdzs #my art #the untamed #these were plays on palettes and silhouettes and overall just me having fun #if someone wants to find some problematic nonsense that they force onto my intentions that never happened just touch grass #the fact that i have to even say that now because people couldn't handle darker skinned WWX or NMJ... #but great majority of people were really nice about my designs so these are for u!

[bitegore]

Zionists want you to conflate Judaism and Zionism. Zionists want you to believe that Judaism cannot exist without Zionism and that all Jews are Zionists. Zionism would have Jews believe that a Jewish state is the only way that they can be safe from antisemitism and will point to any instance of antisemitism as proof that Zionism is the solution- so Zionism wants gentiles to be antisemitic in their support of Palestine. They want you to conflate all Jews with Zionism and the state of Israel, and they want you to treat all Jews regardless of political affiliation as the face of Israel. Antizionist Jews exist, and incidences of antisemitism ostensibly acting against Zionism will not help dismantle the forces propping Zionism up.

Don't do their work for them.

#red rambles #viva palestina #antizionism #i haven't actually seen a lot of antisemitism personally. not recently anyway. but that's more a feature of me not following antisemites #i DO however see a lot of people talking about the people they're seeing throw their support behind antisemites using palestine #as an excuse to conflate all jews with israel #and i cannot stress enough that that is literally what israel and zionist forces abroad WANT. #i am jewish. my entire family is jewish. i want to see palestine free. and i have SEEN how the jewish community gets conflated with israel #both from the inside and out #and i am dead serious when i say that every time someone is antisemitic it strengthens the conviction from people abroad #that it's a terrible sad situation but there's 'no other choice' #if you're being antisemitic you are doing the enemy's work for them. Stop it. #like... look. i am putting this in the tags bc im talking in the tags but i mean this. I do not give a single flying fuck if you personally #are a giant raging antisemite at the moment. Your personal beliefs are your problem and not mine. I do not fucking care. But if you are #being openly and loudly antisemitic *in your support of palestine* you are absolutely not fucking helping. I am so dead serious right now #if you want to raise awareness and you're being antisemitic because of deep held beliefs or whatever i want you to look around and read the #fucking room. Do you understand how much of Israel's international support comes from the idea that they are the only country where jews ar #safe from antisemitism? do you see how every time palestine comes up people point at incidences of antisemitism in anti-genocide actions to #discredit the entire movement? do you not understand how your actions are cutting the movement down at the knees? #i'm jewish and proud of it. i don't like antisemitism. but there's a genocide on and i'd rather work against it than quibble over who i #work alongside. i dont fucking care. you can be as antisemitic as you like in private. stop fucking the movement up. #there are bigger things to worry about here. if i can put aside my own concerns as to who i'm talking to you can hold your tongue #and fight the good fight instead of handing weapons to the people who are trying to fucking flatten gaza.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Happy Valentine's Day! (and this blog's first post anniversary!)

#poorly drawn mdzs #better drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan wangji #Woah...it's been a whole *year* since I took the leap and uploaded my 'first attempt' art. #It's outdated now but it holds a special place in my heart for the fact it started all of this off. #Calling this 'poorly-drawn' was always about accepting that my art was going to be imperfect and messy - and doing it anyways! #There has been a staggering number of times I have drawn something I almost didn't upload because I didn't think it was 'good enough' #only for someone to say they liked it - or that it made them laugh. And it has helped me realize - #-The worst critic for my work has always been myself. If I listened to it all the time...well we would not be here now B'*) #And now that I have dabbled in other fandoms I can truly see how lucky was to start out with the MXTX fans. #The supportive messages and tags have truly been a guiding force toward my artistic and self improvement. #I really can't describe how grateful I am. #Thank you for seeing something worth rooting for when I was just figuring things out. #Thank you for being sweeter than the candy I have strategically hidden in the nooks and crannies of this house. #But watch out! If you forget to find them we will get ants. #I remembered to not hide chocolate in the bed this year. Yes I know it melted last time. Yes it did stain. I'm still sorry. #Thank you for loving me regardless <3 Even if it looked like I shit the bed real bad.

[yashley]

#critical role #cr lb #ygifs #imogen #and now I'm like did imogen have her own reason for not even going near the raven queen did she pray to her for her mother #thinking her mother was dead was gone and the goddess of death had her and it was just a little girl praying at her bedside #take care of her mother. tell her how much she misses her. she misses her so much. and the raven queen never answered #and she could find no comfort not even in a deity who brought eternal rest there was no solace. and there was no correction #did she pick a god and pray? for her mother to come back. for her father not to hate her. for someone to look at her like shes not a monste #that all this time this certified atheist to have zero interest in the gods or helping them not because she genuinely didn't care #but because once upon a time the little girl she used to be cared so much. and prayed so hard. never seeing the red veil around her #damning her from the grace of the gods #and isn't that just what a monster deserves #not even a gracious god will find you special enough you feel like nothing to them because you are nothing to them #and it's like is that true or is such an evil force preventing their light and it's like I'm chewing but I'm choking #I had to stop looking at laura's face because it was making me too craaazzzyy she'd just be like (bafta) and I'd be like (SCREAMING) #hey matt if this is a birdcall to make imogen a paladin tweet tweet beautiful man

[p3terpaan]

Heaven will fall As you hold him in your arms Blood on our hands We stand alone

#gabv1el #v1 ultrakill #gabriel ultrakill #ultrakill #ultrakill fanart #ultrakill v1 #ultrakill gabriel #i love yaoi #i was gonna caption this aaah they're gonna fuckk 😝 😝 😝 but then i went hm. maybe not #anyways i was forced to make this for a gabv1el playlist #im also very unwell because of these 2. someone help me pl.ease

[ride-a-dromedary]

Listen I know "Daddy Halsin" has become a tongue in cheek haha wink wink fandom reference, but like...I cannot tell you how legitimately happy it makes me that this great bear of a man, who expresses throughout the narrative that he's always wanted a family but never got the chance, whose lineage ended with him and he sounds endlessly regretful about it, who delights over children and their laughter and happily accepts Yenna into their camp, who wants to protect the vulnerable and help make the world better, and does not want to lead but wants to care for and nurture, finally got what he wanted! And he's so happy about it! He's practically glowing when he says it! That's very important to me!

#BG3 Musing #Halsin Posting #Halsin #and maybe eventually he will move on to something new because he's a free wandering spirit #but honestly? i think halsin's fleeting presence is partially due to the fact that this is legitimately what he really wanted #but never got it and now he finally has what he wants instead of being forced to take things he doesn't due to circumstance #and maybe that's where his roots need to be - maybe he's finally found them #anyway daddy halsin is a completely literal thing in my mind the connotation is not there for me #it's legit just someone who was delighted to finally become a dad being called 'daddy' for the first time

[reenaki]

Something something.....

..infatuation....

#get out of my head #please free me from this man #i want to drink him like the soup im forced to drink now because my braces wont let me chew #this is NOT Kaeluc #thats my skin tone #thankyou #clip studio paint #digital art #diluc #diluc ragnvindr #diluc art #diluc genshin impact #diluc x reader #artist #i love the idea of just #being so infatuated and melted #for someone

[wiisagi-maiingan]

Hi if you struggle with opening containers (jars, bottles, etc) because of poor grip strength or w/e, there's lid opener tools that range from fancy electronic ones to super cheap and basic ones and they can be an absolute game changer. I have one that looks like an angry can opener and now I can actually open bottles on my own without wanting to break down crying from the pain.

#i don't know how to explain mine it's got a lot of spikes #if you search 'lid opener' you'll find a bunch and you'll know it when you see it #i didn't want to put this in the actual post because i don't want it to be misinterpreted #but it's actually really humiliating being forced to ask someone to open a bottle for me just so that i can have a drink #especially when i've been working at it for a while and i can't really use my hand anymore from the strain

[lunarharp]

if i just told you i love you would this world change

#witch hat tag #orufrey #these kinda suck lol i feel like i cant draw right now *irritated sigh* BUT I FEEL EMOTIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #if you are gay go watch good omens season 2 right now. NO YOU DONT KNOW THO!!!!!!!!! #i know being this affected by good omens is probably cringe. I dont care any more. the last 1 minute of good omens season 2 was #some of the most affecting acting i've ever seen in my life. sometimes someone acts with the force as if their entire career led to that #like during the credits part the very end im not even talking about before that. holy god #aziraphale i know everything about you. i know what you are feeling right now. i can see everything on your face. we're going to make it #ER.... NOT THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS POST. IT'S NOT SPOILERS !!!!!!!!!!!!! #I JUST FEEL THOROUGHLY CHANGED !!!!!!!!!!! SHIT GETS REAL FROM NOW ON.. LIKE IN GENERAL! IN MY LIFE! #tormented gay love tormented gay love TORMENTED GAY LOVE TORMENTED GAY LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #btw the first 3 images were drawn earlier with an entirely different feeling and an entirely different mood. #Why do you keep pulling away from me? #It is because i love you that i do this #the lyrics from one of my japanese orufrey songs (A SONG THAT THE CREATOR LISTENS TO!!!!) led to feelings #“あなたが知らない私を残さず見ててほしいの” but i'm not translating it cause it just sounds weird. if with his eyes oru's asking “WHY don't you want #to let me in? to see all of you?“ those lyrics are like ”I actually want you to see every last bit of the parts of me you don't know“ #oru you have no idea how much i want to lay bare my whole soul for you #maybe it's an alternate version of chapter 40. to me #i need to draw something really fucking good or i'm not going to forgive myself. i will not rest in this life #until i have made the orufrey that fully satisfies me nor until i have seen what the manga is leading to #NO STORY MEANS ANYTHING WITHOUT TORMENTED GAY LOVE AT THE HEART OF IT. THATS THE HEART OF THIS WORLD!!!!! #........... so Hi im normal :) haha *goes and finally makes breakfast*

[podcast-hemocytoblast]

By the time cars were invented, Jonah Magnus was already well into the body hopping game, which raises the question: has he ever actually learn to drive? Did this man sit through driver’s ed? Or has he just been getting out of legal repercussions for his shit driving by telling the cops everything he knows about their deepest darkest secrets every time he gets pulled over?

#the magnus archives #tma #jonah magnus #elias bouchard #tma spoilers #au in which real elias is alive in there because Jonah needs someone who can tell him what the road signs mean #poor man is forced to spend the rest of his days as a literal backseat driver for a pseudo-immortal douchebag #perish the thought #I’m sure someone has already asked this question by now but I can’t stop thinking about it #some people have pointed out that he would ride the tube which makes sense too. #btw this post is 100% inspired by how much I used to fear for my LIFE any time i was in a car while my grandpa was driving #genuinely terrifying experience grandpa stop it please quit turning your entire body around to talk to me while I’m sitting in the back sea #why are you driving with one foot for the pedal the other foot for the brake one hand on the steering wheel and NO EYES ON THE ROAD

[sysig]

Puts the “plates” in “Fellplates” (Patreon)

#Doodles #Handplates #UT #Fellplates #Gaster #Papyrus #Hurt Gaster! Do it! Maybe classic will get a shiver down the infiniteness of the multiverse! #I wonder if he'd actually do it to himself or if he'd get it put on him by someone else for the full dramatic twist haha #Who even would? Asgore from sheer force? Alphys?? Idk lol #It's just the irony for me for now ♪ #Although to completely cover them there'd have to be four rather than two :0 Hmm #Alphys' gift of fingerless gloves was a lot less invasive hm ♪ But that's part of the fun #I don't mean to keep doing crossovers - quite anyway lol - but hmm could that be 2-P from Fellplates with so much empathy in his eyes? #I guess it's the question of if Monsters Are or if they are Made ♪ Personally I'm partial to the latter but I do still fall into the former #Well either way - the important part is a Papyrus that doesn't like what he sees! He knows how much those hurt first (or 2nd? pfft) hand #And then just some errant thoughts about the Lost Soul head style and Gaster's void scars - give 'em to this version why not #Does any Gaster remain unscathed? Would he even be Gaster in that case? :) #A smile behind the white glow and tired eyes ringed by dark scars ♪ Fellplates is fun because he always looks good when he's suffering #The void smoke is still quite fun to draw hehe

[viperwhispered]

Rest

Guess what? I've got more Jamil x reader for y'all. You can also find this on ao3. No warnings, just 866 words of kinda fluffy(?) caretaking stuff with gender-neutral reader.

At this point, you know Jamil’s schedule almost as well as he does. So, when you have the chance, you head to Scarabia’s kitchen, hoping to spend some time with Jamil while he and the other students prepare dinner. 

However, when you enter, it takes you but a moment to notice Jamil’s uncharacteristic fumbling and the tired look in his eyes. The way Jamil’s chopping the vegetables has you worried about him cutting himself with that knife he’s usually so adept with, and it seems it’s only force of habit that’s keeping him on track.

You frown, and when your eyes meet Jamil’s, you can already see him put his guard up.

So he knows what state he is in, huh? And still, here he is.

It seems Jamil is reading your thoughts, all of him telling you drop it before any words are even said.

At least he still lets you lean in and give a quick kiss to his cheek in greeting.

“Hello love. Do you still have a lot on your agenda for today?” you ask, keeping your tone low for at least some semblance of privacy in the busy kitchen.

“Nothing I can’t handle,” is the response you get.

Of course.

It takes a little more pestering before Jamil actually answers your question. Your lips purse. That list is far too long to your liking.

You take a moment to think, juggling your own plans and to-do list against the urgency of the things Jamil mentioned.

“Will Kalim be eating from that?” you ask, pointing at the food Jamil is preparing.

“Yes.”

“Alright, I won’t be touching that one, then. I’ve gotta do a few things but I’ll be back when you’re done here.”

“Don’t,” Jamil says with a glare, clearly aware of what you’re thinking.

Yet even his disapproving look doesn’t have the usual weight behind it.

“Yes. I will,” you say firmly, even as your heart curls inwards with another bout of concern.

Really, when did he get so tired?

And how did you not notice it earlier?

You leave the kitchen before Jamil can protest further, hurrying through the dorm corridors to find Kalim.

Soon you have an enthusiastic – and concerned – supporter for your plans. You have Kalim point out a few reliable Scarabia students to help with a few of the most urgent matters Jamil mentioned – cleaning up the common areas, delivering some paperwork to Crowley, preparing some dorm-wide notices – while you see to Kalim getting his school supplies in order for the following day. You even recruit a couple of third years to help Kalim with his homework.

You’ll see to the rest tomorrow – after all, you do also have a boyfriend to look after.

Your conversation over dinner can hardly be called anything else than an argument – despite Kalim’s best attempts at acting as a moderating force between you two. It is very tempting to ask Kalim to tell Jamil to take the rest of the day off – it’s not like Jamil would be willing to openly disobey a direct order. Still, you really don’t need to remind Jamil of his position on top of everything else that you’re already doing more or less against his wishes.

Eventually, however, Jamil’s had a square meal, the most urgent things on his to-do list are being taken care of, and you’ve managed to drag him to his bed.

“I really wish you wouldn’t push yourself so hard,” you murmur, your arms wrapped tightly around Jamil. You’re telling yourself you really do just want to cuddle, to offer some respite to Jamil. Still, there might also be a part of you worried that if you were to let go, he’d just jump up and get back to working himself to the bone.

Yet, for all his protestations, just the fact that you’ve gotten Jamil to lay down with you speaks volumes of his current exhaustion.

“I can’t just leave my duties, albi. You know this.”

“Making yourself too indispensable, is what you’re doing,” you protest.

Oh, you know it’s not so simple. Not with his background, not with all the expectations and assumptions.

But sometimes you really wish it would be.

Jamil merely scoffs in response to your words.

Still, it is undeniable that he is slowly beginning to relax in your arms, slowly bringing his head closer to yours. His eyes are starting to flutter, too.

“I will still need to help Kalim with his homework, at the very least.”

You wonder who he is trying to convince more, you or himself.

“Amin and Khalil are helping him. They’re basically top of their classes, aren’t they? I’m sure they’ve got it.”

Still, Jamil frowns.

You sigh. He really is not letting go, is he?

“Do you want me to go supervise?” you ask.

And leave you, unsaid yet hanging there right after your words.

“Don’t,” Jamil eventually says, the word barely more than a breath.

It seems he has accepted his fate.

You softly caress Jamil’s hair, listening to his softening breathing.

And when you wake up, wholly unaware of having been lulled to sleep in the first place, it’s to the lightest of touches from Jamil’s fingers.

Tagging @diodellet @twstgo @crystallizsch @jamilvapologist @jamilsimpno69 as per request If you'd like to be tagged for any future works, let me know!

#twisted wonderland #jamil viper #twisted wonderland x reader #jamil viper x reader #woop it sure has been quite the burst of creative energy lately #especially since this has apparently been sitting in my drafts since last august #but now you have it #I certainly can’t promise to keep up with this rate of writing (in fact I can promise I won't) but hey let's enjoy it while it lasts #and yes I’m hopping on the “jamil using arabic terms of endearment” train #I’ve read so many fics doing that that at this point it feels more natural than english ngl #even if english would probably be more canonical #also is it a *good* way to go about it to just pretty much just force someone to rest like this? probably not #is it sometimes the only way to get stubborn people to stop for a bit? perhaps #and is it something I might do? #...possibly #also oh boy can you tell that I'm avoiding jamil's dialogue like the plague lately? #I really need to reread so much of his stuff to get a hang of his voice again #(also if you notice typos pls tell me because they always bug me) #(or other wonkiness because I'm not a native speaker and sometimes things just go silly) #anyways hope y'all enjoy!