#just know i have feelings. a lot of them

[haunted-xander]

Terra voice how do I tell my teacher slash parental figure I think the new kid might be a victim of child abuse

#i think about pre-bbs ven way more than i should #i had a rant for the tags written but internet fucked up and it didnt post and now i cant be bothered to write it all again #just know i have feelings. a lot of them #terra #aqua #ventus #kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts birth by sleep #kh #kh bbs #art #my art #xanders art #digital art #fan art

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !! #& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

[somnimagus]

My page for @sheikahzine; about Impaz's duty to her village, empty of people and full of memories.

[id in alt text]

#legend of zelda #loz #twilight princess #loz tp #i'm still reeling that someone sent me an ask about this one.. that they took the time to find my tumblr and tell me they liked it #it really meant a lot; thank you to anyone that stops to leave comments like that. they make me happy #but yeah! here's the usual symbolism ramble: #i thought it'd be cool to have the 'spirits' flowing one way and the cats walking through them the other way #to kinda show the difference in life inhabiting the village in the past and present #link's face is covered because impaz was just waiting for 'the hero' so his clothes are what matters; not his face #and it (hopefully) gives a surreal and intangible sense to 'the hero' she could only hope would actually show up #you can feel free to interpret the glowy blue sheikah as ghosts or just as memories of the past! i couldn't decide either way #the one on the bottom left is oot impa since she's implied to be the village founder. so i guess she would be a ghost actually? #fan art #my art #project stuff #and ahhh the book-- everyone's stuff is so beautiful!! #especially the writing. some of the fics made me really tear up and some were so fun and clever. i really love them #a lot of them captured the sheer burden of the role of the sheikah; all of the time and grief and doubt #i know i always say this stuff about every project but. the people i get to work with in these are truly so skilled every time

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

christ sometimes I just wanna. steal a time machine & go back & sit down next to my 9-year-old self and just like. let them pull out their pokemon card binder & gush about their holographic gyarados or whatever. I'd just smile & ask questions about motherfukcing bulbasaur & tell my kid self that I thought they were a neat person, & someday they'd find other people who thought so too.

like i'm a grown adult who honestly finds most kids stuff boring, but. damn if i could go back & hang out with my baby self & listen to them ramble...just so they knew someone was listening. i would in a heartbeat. thinking about u kid

#wouldn't roll my eyes or check my phone or get bored or nothing #I'd just listen to that little dork & smile & encourage them & let them explain how their favorite gameboy games worked #i was the kind of kid my adult self would find annoying & uninteresting but like #most of the actual adults in my childhood felt that way too. including my dang parents. #and ya know sometimes they showed it. a lot of times without realizing it. and that messes a kid up #if you don't make an effort kids WILL recognize your disinterest and lack of attention. #kids deserve to have caregivers who show interest and engagement #even when it's over stuff that adults find boring. especially then maybe #your kid doesn't have to be fun or interesting or easy or well behaved to deserve positive attention #they deserve positive attention because they are YOUR KID #if love is unconditional then DISPLAYS of LOVE and AFFECTION must also be unconditional #not something that must be earned #telling your kid that you love them is not enough. that is step one out of like a thousand #if you just tell your kid you love them but you don't demonstrate affection and interest and patience and warmth and etcetera #your kid isn't gonna feel loved! I Love You will just become a trite phrase that they regard with mistrust! #bitch you gotta FOLLOW THROUGH

[lizzibennet]

my favorite line in the barbie movie was “we’re going back for my doll” like i felt that so so deeply. it’s about the inherent connection a little girl has to her most beloved doll and the abject horror of realizing u accidentally left her behind somewhere. like u do not know what else is happening and do not care if it’s inconvenient you ARE coming back for that doll. similarly it’s about being an adult and feeling so lost and dejected and remembering when the world was yours to invent, yours to build, yours to take - all you needed was that little doll and you were set and it all seemed so simple and magical. it’s about reminiscing and realizing little you knew so, so much, she understood a lot you seem to be struggling with rn. it’s about coming back for and to little you. it’s about waving to the little girl you once were and being kind to her and asking what does she have to share with you today and tucking her in and knowing with absolute certainty what she knew back then: no matter what else is happening, no matter where you are, where you’ve gone, where she is, you are going back for that fucking doll, simply because you must

#sorry as someone who was once a doll collector and had to sell them for $$$ reasons and misses them so so very much #that line was just like. god i know in the movie it’s almost inconsequential but like. you ARE going back for that little doll #you ARE that’s not a discussion. that’s the way it HAS to happen #AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! i have a lot of feelings but most especially I MISS MY DOLLS SO MUCH BRO #barbie spoilers #barbie

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

#selfie bee #me telling a coworker who I have been working with for 4 months and whose name I do not know about my toenails #i'm sorry Tobias (?? Paul ??) it was the only topic I could come up with after I already told you about the big bird I saw in 8th grade #FRIENDS how are you!! :) how has the new year been so far!! #did you have a lot of snow on christmas! #we did and it was really fun! I had a very bad cold so I just watched the snow from inside but that was good too c: #do you have any plans for the new year? #i always have lot and most of the time I do not do any of them but planning is fun #this year I REALLY want to watch all of Star Trek ヽ(´∇｀)ﾉ #I would also love to learn how to make a handstand #imagine if you could just make yourself upside down #but it is a far away dream because honestly I am not very good at being usual side up most of the time either #but I will try probably at least 2 times to learn it ( ᐛ ) #maybe I'll finally finish that website! #new years are good and fun #it's wild to think about how much daily life has changed since last year but I feel just the same :) #who knows what this year will bring! #I hope I don't hit a pheasant with my car #I almost hit a pheasant with my car last year and the pheasant made direct eye contact #I wonder how he is doing today #since that moment I think about pheasants a lot #I knew they were real but I had never seen one #just to know they are out there is a mystical feeling #right know it is raining so all the pheasants might be wet #get dry soon pheasants!! #I don't think I've ever seen a wet bird either #I don't know what do do with all these birds thoughts #also thank you for the person who asked about my skirt!! ( ˊᵕˋ )♡.°⑅ #I've finished it and its really really bad #but I love it

[dreadark]

that ivan loves till is the most obvious thing about them

but. does ivan know that…?

the ivan that regards his own feelings as shallow, the ivan that learned how emotions are expressed only from copying others… does he even know that the love he’s felt for so long is love? probably not. and part of the reason is the one he loves himself

because the easiest example he has of love is till's feelings to mizi. till outright calls it love, and ivan watches him so much he has to be aware of this and till’s love to mizi is totally unselfish, right. he doesn’t seem to actually want much from her—just that she's still there and still "mizi"

but ivan can't be satisfied with just watching he… wants. ivan wants till’s attention, till’s affection—

surely this selfish wanting can’t be love

...no wonder he was never able to express his feelings straightforwardly when he belittles them so much but he can’t stand not having anything either, so he does… whatever he does instead to get any scraps of attention he can, from someone he's convinced doesn't care about him at all only showing affection when till can't see it, right until he knows he's going to die

but ivan's feelings for till are all he still has of himself... to think of them as shallow...

I've seen this translated as "I should've been kinder" to him (till) or to her (sua)

but really, the one he should've been kinder to was himself

#alien stage #alnst #alnst ivan #ivantill #i have a lot of thoughts on till -> mizi too but this is long enough #just attempting to rewrite my twt rambles more coherently #idk why i wrote this so dramatically tho... #'thank you for being the victim of my shallow emotions' is going to haunt me to my grave #ivan's character is just a careful balance between his natural freak nature and his extreme depths of self-loathing #making him the most miserable guy ever #...really once you realize so much of what went wrong is thanks to ivan just hating himself too much to even think of them as friends. well #c...can we bring him back... don't die like this..... #(also you know. with the implications of how 'pets' are treated #wanting someone physically must feel... even more wrong

[miwtual]

im so fucking tired of the disrespect gifmakers get on the gifmaker website

#kai.txt #negativity tw #(sorry these are gonna be a lot of tags. i have a lot of feelings and i dont know where else to put them) #we make gifs and nobody reblogs them #when they do get reblogged all people want to tell you is that your gifs arent good enough to them and rip it to shreds #'you're missing x' 'why didnt you do y' 'if i made this i would have abc' 'hey op ur wrong and this is why' 'i dont like this op' #reposters dont even reblog your fucking gifset but they'll save your gifs to repost later asking for how to do something #that they could have asked you how to do in the fucking first place #we reblog ourselves constantly because nobody else will and maybe to make our work look like it has more notes than it does #to make ourselves feel better about the lack of interaction we're getting #and then when we TALK about this frustration we have. people who are too afraid to say it to our faces #go on anon in our askboxes and tell us how we're somehow selfish for wanting people to interact with the sets #that we spent time on. hours. days. WEEKS in some cases #or we get anons who tell us the reason we dont have notes are because we arent good at gifmaking in the first place #but this is all on anon. because they're too scared to tell it to our faces #they're too scared for us to see that they ARENT a gifmaker and that they dont know how to do it any better either #they dont see us as people doing something we love as a hobby. they see us as content machines that dance like court jesters #im just so fucking tired of the disrespect #and this sentiment goes for more than just gifmakers. graphicmakers. artists. literally any creative hobby shared on this site #we get treated like shit and for what? literally for fucking what.

[ruporas]

i killed. i murdered. i'm nothing like these sleepy people here… nevertheless, you can actually be grateful? bastard… i’m saying… thank you. because you spilled blood, you saved all of these people’s lives. i couldn’t have done it without you. (ID in alt)

#vashwood #vash the stampede #nicholas d wolfwood #trigun #trigun maximum #participated in altades' dance collab :3 very grateful for the opportunity and many thanks to them for organizing this! #there was a lot of vw arc choices... but i went for the leonof arc bc it's a dear vw moment to me #i think a lot of the leonof arc further breaks down vash's ideology and for the readers - together with ww- to learn that his ideals aren't #pure naivety and that vash knows he's at an odd standpoint with himself. he's criticized ww for shooting rai-dei just prior when ww had don #so on the behalf of vash but here he thanks him for killing on behalf of his home and its genuine. bc vash's presence - although it's not #his fault - he was the reason leonof and gray had gotten to the ship and killed people there. that's the guilt he has to live with and #despite his anger he'd still resolute not to kill. meanwhile ww just did what he had to - beating down on a seemingly immortal monster but #at the core made up of many lives he had to take and i feel as the fight dragged on - his own mentality waned. committing active carnage #while remembering the orphanage... and bearing that guilt alongside the words vash left with him during rai-dei's death #only for vash to thank him afterwards what he's done and for apologizing for pushing his beliefs on ww when he had no solutions of his own #anyway. i just have so an immense love for this arc bc they just got around to appreciating each other in weird ways. though ofc its still #weird and confusing for ww bc every new info on vash it'll just be strange to him as someone who's human #ruporas art

[tianhai03]

didnt have the time to do a full finished drawing, but i tried to keep up with my tradition for redrawing the same good bro day drawing ive done for 3 years already :')

(last year's, which also has links to prev years as well)

#feels like i havent drawn the boys in. forever. i missed them #kinda unrelated and i said this on twitter too but i think most of you guys here should hear it... #i know a lot of you have followed me since my early dmc days and i just wanted to take the chance to thank you #its crazy to me that ppl have known me for so long and the support means a lot to me #i know i havent posted a lot this year bc ive just been busy with work but im grateful you guys still stuck around. thank you :) #anyways back to actual tags #devil may cry #vergil(dmc) #dante(dmc) #allyart

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Game night ruined.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #jiang cheng #wang lingjiao #If the assorted Jiang disciples look familiar it's because they are the same as the disciples in the LWJ in Yunmeng Jiang AU comics! #I decided that if I was going to have background characters come up a lot I may as well solidify a few designs. #We are following MLP background character rules in the sense there are more disciples around but these guys fill in for them #Do they have names? No(t yet). #I just think the jiang disciples are very sweet and cute in the audio drama. I hope nothing bad happens to them. #(let me have me fun and whimsy with them before...you know...) #I feel like I totally missed an opportunity to set WLJ up as an 'Um Actually" girl. #“you're hitting on my man? UM ACTUALLY get BURNT” #“You want to fly kites? UM ACTUALLY It's offensive to my sect so get fucked” #“UM ACTUALLY we're setting up a supervisory office here” #“You want me to stay? UM ACTUALLY I think we pissed off some ghosts so I'm outtie <3” #Do you see the lost potential here? I'm furious at myself for not seeing it sooner.

[thenotoriousscuttlecliff]

Starting to think many don't really know what a filler episode is if they think all of these are filler. A filler episode isn't just a one-off story, but normally something that just feels like it is utterly forgettable and disposable and mainly there to fill out the schedule because the writers didn't have any better ideas. Episodes like Move Along Home, The Storyteller, Second Sight, The Muse, Let He Who Is Without Sin, Resurrection, Profit and Lace, etc. The type of episodes many will just skip on a rewatch.

#I know what isn't everyone #and there are many who will watch every episode and find something in them they like #but really feels like many now don't quite understand what filler episodes are #or have this romanticised idea of them all being really good and full of great character development #probably is true for some #but a lot are just going through the motions #or feature changes that get reset at the end of the episode

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Does

Does Barnaby

Does Barnaby tell the others to get off his lawn when he's angry

psh, who do you think he is, an old man? he'd Bark, like any lively young dog

#serves them right for (playfully) arguing right outside of his house smh #hes got sensitive ears yall... probably... i wouldnt know... #i bet ya could hear that woof everywhere in the neighborhood #and feel it. its gotta be deep as hell. bass boosted boof #legend has it that a Single Can fell in howdy's store #scribble salad #welcome home #welcome home puppet show #many thoughts about barnaby and barking #id imagine that if asked if he can bark hed be like 'yeah but its a waste of effort / who has the time for That' #i doubt he ever really does it... #cause that would take effort and really when would he be in the mood to be able to do it #its like. i dont get how some people can just let out a real good yell/scream on command #if im not angry enough i Physically Cannot raise my voice in that way. just dont have it in me #and id also think that barnaby has a thick skin. takes a lot to make him That Peeved yk yk #but when he does bark. oof. thats gotta be the loudest shit ever #everyone runs out of their homes like 'what happened??? is there a thunderstorm??? did a fuckin Bomb go off??' #meanwhile barnaby is slamming his door behind him and frank & julie are speedwalking away from his house with ringing ears #thoughts thoughts thoughts Musings

[dustbunsinspace]

Part of 🟢 Leo gets Overwhelmed au🟢

Aah, I’m so happy I made it in in time! 💙✨ Merry Christmas, tumblr nation! Here’s a little comic about 03 Usagi and Leo going so see the Rockefeller tree after the events of the Christmas Aliens episode.

Little post about events earlier that night

Also this is literally how maskless Leo looks to me, he’s so moomincore ;

#leosagi #katana shipping #03 leosagi #leo gets overwhelmed au #tmnt 2003 #03 tmnt #03 leonardo #03 usagi #ens tmnt 03 #I need a tag for this #cause I have more of this timeline in my drafts #merry Christmas loves #may this year be a good one #I’ve been watching old romantic comedies with my mom while drawing this #can you tell #also fun fact #it’s been in my drafts since like march? #I just wanted to draw something cute #that’s why they’re also extra round and squishy #also #got engaged last week #so I feel extra sappy hahahah #the full name is Leo Gets Overwhelmed and Elopes to Usagi’s World Nstead Of Going to Therapy au #because he later does just that #I have a few comics drafted for this #but man #when will I clean them #who knows #I’m moving to a brand new apartment next month and will have to do a lot of renovations

[pizzaqueen]

A snippet from a future fic I'll probably never write, where Steve is a widower with two teenage kids, and he and Eddie randomly meet up, rekindling their old flame. This is when they've been together a while:

“Thank you,” Steve says, coming up behind Eddie at the bathroom sink.

Eddie pauses, catching Steve's eye in the mirror. “What for?” he asks, mouth foamy with toothpaste.

Steve slips his hands along Eddie's hips, hooks his chin over Eddie's shoulder. “For loving my kids.”

“You don't—” Toothpaste dribbles down Eddie's chin and he stoops to spit what's left in his mouth into the sink, gathering his hair to one side. He rinses his mouth out, wipes his face with a towel, then turns to Steve. “You don't have to thank me for that. Of course I love them.”

“Not everyone I've dated has.”

“They're idiots.” Eddie grabs the hem of Steve's shirt, pulling him close. “I mean, first of all, they're part of you, and I don't think I could love you and not love them. But...” He trails off, a small smile tilting his lips. “They're amazing kids.”

Pride swells in Steve's chest; he slides his arms around Eddie's waist and says, “They are.”

“And I'm pretty damn honored I get to be part of their lives,” Eddie says, “so thank you,” and he butts his head gently against Steve's.

Steve huffs and slides his hands up Eddie's back, pulling him into a tight embrace. “I love you.” He presses a kiss to Eddie's neck.

“I love you too.”

“And they both love you as well.”

Eddie lets out a shuddering breath. Steve knows how nervous Eddie was, when they started dating, that he wouldn't be welcomed, but it's almost like he's always been part of their family now. “Good to know,"”Eddie says.

Steve holds Eddie a little tighter. All those years ago, back in Hawkins, when they ended things, Steve thought he'd never see Eddie again. But here they are, together—a family—and Steve's never letting him go this time.

#Steddie #Steve x eddie #Steddie fic #Steddie fanfic #this is soooooo sappy I’m sorry 😫 #anyway I don’t have names for Steve’s kids yet lol #but his son is bi too #his daughter is more like him otherwise though #also Steve takes a while to accept his sexuality so he’s only just come out to his kids because I like stories like that #even though I know some ppl in this fandom have found them offensive?? #but yeah when he comes out his son gets upset because he then feels like he can’t come out without it being weird haha #and Steve is like what??? no??? when he eventually tells him #(I watched a lot of soap operas growing up :P sometimes it comes out in my writing lol) #that’s why I’ll probably never write this fic but it’s fun to dabble in the verse #pizzaqueenfic #pizzaqueenwrites #tsofverse

[switchcase]

For everyone in the USA with wheelchair fundraisers/can't afford a wheelchair: consider vocational rehabilitation. It's a govt program available in every state, and it IS a massive pain in the ass to go through, but if they do a physical eval and find that you can't keep or start working/going to uni without disability aids, they will pay for it. There's no strings attached either. If you have insurance they'll run it through ins first and then pay the portion that insurance won't pay.

#wheelchair #wheelchair user #cripplepunk #cripple punk #disability #They pay for other stuff too like hearing aids but I feel like most Deafies know about this already #Just because audiology is so rarely covered by ins that a lot of Deaf people go through VR for HAs and CIs #I got my HAs from VR. Would have been $6k I think without them