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#like yeah i hate working but as a kid you spent so much time doing nothing waiting for your parents to finish
1eos · 1 year
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what's with ppl acting like if you didn't pick up something as a child then you'll never learn as if you're locked in stasis once you're an adult? it kinda makes me sad bc you spend most of your life as an adult :/ the idea that most of your life you're just miserably unable to do anything new is just so.... bleak
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sammygender · 1 year
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some of my most random fucking original characters from half-baked story ideas i have yet to fully develop are the most tragic ones to ever exist. like yeah the people from my current work are pretty fucked up but they don’t inspire as much pain in me as when i think about citydale characters. min truly and genuinely makes me want to cry
#it’s just. auuugh when you’re a writer and you’re sooo lonely and you’re this like 15 year old trans kid and your sisters dead and your mom#hates you and all you can do is live in your own delusion and form parasocial relationships with strangers in your class or on your tiktok#but for some reason god picks you why does god pick you is it even god??? and you create ur own little fucking self contained world through#your writing and as you write your characters based off these real life parasocial relationships you suck these real people into this fake#world and you rewrite their lives and everything about them and make them more relatable and more you and control their fates the way you#can’t control your own. and suddenly ur 16 and ur a miniature god and everyone you were obsessed with hates you so so much but you never#meant to do anything bad. and there’s one kid who gives you a chance and he’s just like you but yeah of course he is that’s because you MADE#him just like you you wouldn’t give him a happy ending or a happy life and he hates you too he has to!#and then you’re road tripping with this kid through a town that’s not real and a world that’s not your own even though you made it#and ur meeting god and ur meeting angels but who fucking knows you might just be hallucinating everything’s so murky and you don’t know when#you got blessed/cursed with these powers and you don’t know if the boy next to you is real#and you’ve spent ur life scared of god and now you become him but he can’t be bothered with you and you’re not even the only one you’re not#even special#and all this time ur sisters dead and ur parents suck and you try to rewrite both those things but it hasn’t quite worked. and ur really sad#and fundamentally you’re still 15 and stuck in ur room creating a false reality#*will toledo voice*: heyyy space cadet it’s alright to want to dream it doesn’t mean reality is mean-#Jesus fucking christ ahyway. one of these days i will sit down and i will write citydale#oc posting…#citydale#oliver talks
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rogueddie · 5 months
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It takes Steve an embarassingly long moment to realise that the spray isn't doing anything. He tries shaking it… nothing. He even checks by spraying it on his hand, shaking it again. Nothing.
He tries listening as he shakes it again and, though he's sure there's some product still left inside, nothing will come out.
He reluctantly throws it in the little trash can, just next to the toilet door. He doesn't bother rooting through the draws or cabinets either; he'd used the last of his emergency powder kit yesterday. There's nothing left.
He huffs, folding his arms, glaring at his reflection. Specifically at the very overgrown, bright blond roots of his hair.
It brings up the same anxiety he's been having for the past month. It's taken him a long time to save up for his usual hairdressers. He hadn't thought it would take so long but, with the kids and now Robin and Eddie, it shouldn't be that surprising.
Robin often pays a good chunk for things too, often paying him gas money, but it's usually him paying for everything. And now that he's paying rent in his own little appartment? He's not often left with that much at the end of the month.
He's starting to think it's not worth the trip. But he isn't going to start using box dye or anything cheap. He's spent a long time taking care of his hair, spent just as long struggling to find the right products too.
He doesn't even care that the kids and Robin mock him for it, he has great hair and, screw it, he's proud. He's not going to damage it by getting bad hair dye.
He's already booked his next hairdresser appointment for the next day, already saved up gas money too. He might as well ask for bleach instead, go back to his natural color and save himself from anymore days with overgrown roots.
He almost regrets the idea when he gets to work.
"Holy shit, you're a natural blond?" Robins grin looks almost painful with how wide it is. She's a little too excited for his comfort. "I don't know how I didn't guess before. This explains so much. How have you kept this hidden for so long? It's so light!"
"Don't you have work to do?" He bats her hand away when she, again, reaches for his hair.
"Not anymore. Why do you dye it? How did it grow out so much? When did you start hiding it? Did someone pressure you into it? They didn't make fun of you, did they? Because I will hunt them down and-"
"No one made me dye it or bullied me into it," he huffs. He can feel his attempt at a cool demeaner soften with how quickly she jumps to his defense. "I just... I never liked it. I don't think it suits me. Brunettes are cute."
"Are you dyeing it again?"
"Probably not. The hairdresser I go to isn't exactly cheap."
"You can get box dye at-"
"I'm not using box dye."
"It's not that bad, and if you really hate the blond-"
Steve swats at her when she reaches for his hair again. With a heavy sigh, he braces himself for the shift full of questions and jokes of 'betrayal'.
Like he suspected, they don't get much work done.
When Eddie comes in, towards the end of their shift, Steve is almost relieved.
"Stop bullying him without me," Eddie complains.
"Thank you," Steve says, whilst Robin boos. "What is it tonight? Movie night with Wayne or some of the kids?"
But Eddie is frozen, staring at his hair.
"I think he's broken," Robin says after a pause.
"You're blond?" Eddie blinks. "When did you go blond?"
"Always have been," Steve shrugs. "Just... not dyeing it anymore."
"Oh."
Steve and Robin stare at him. They share a glance after a moment.
"You here for a movie?" Steve asks.
"What? Me? No, I- just stopping by. And you're... yeah. I'm gonna- I've got to go. Wayne is waiting and... you know. Bye."
He turns around and practically runs out the store. His wheels squeal a little as he drives out, most likely breaking the speed limit.
"Did he just..." Robin starts, trailing off with a frown.
"Unbelievable," Steve shakes his head. "Just when I give up, he realizes that he likes me too! What the hell, Bob. Is he only into blonds or something?"
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moonsgemini · 5 months
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cinnamon girl - rafe cameron
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summary: hating rafe cameron was easy to do when you were both teenagers, but after years a part and time spent thinking about one another one thing leads to another. Secret rendezvous between kook prince and kook princess ensue, finding any spare minute to be with each other without the judgey eyes of outer banks.
warnings: 18+, minors dni, fem reader, she/her, p in v, praise kink, semi public sex (a bunch of people are downstairs), fingering, oral f receiving, dirty talk, sneaking around, secret relationship, cussing, alcohol, enemies to lovers kinda
wc: 3.5k
an: another smutty smut. I have had this in my drafts for a bit & I just needed to finish it. It started out as being inspired by cinnamon girl by lana but I like don’t know what happened. also two posts in one day ???? who am I.
masterlist
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In high school when y/n read Romeo and Juliet she fell in love with the tragic romance. She was astounded that love could be so intense and passionate. So much so that they were sneaking around behind everyone’s backs and the miscommunication ultimately leading to their deaths.
When she was sixteen she met Rafe Cameron. When her father introduced her to the tall blonde she didn’t think he would eventually be her Romeo. Especially not since he didn’t even smile or show the slightest interest in her. Their fathers had recently worked on a business deal together and had got along so well they wanted their families to get together.
She knew who he was and what he was like. Rumors run rampant on the figure eight. He constantly had snarky comments and remarks to make at her. Whether it be about her outfit, her likes, and especially about the boys she dated. y/n would be talking to Sarah about the boy she just went on a date with and Rafe would butt in with his two cents. He was a year older than her and he always made sure to act like he knew better because he was older.
“Fabian? You do know he like has dated half the cheer and volleyball teams,” Rafe scoffed as he stood in front of her and Sarah who were sat on the pool chairs outside. He had overheard y/n talking about the new guy she was seeing and Rafe couldn’t believe who the guy was. He also couldn’t believe she was dating at all.
Y/n looked at him with a glare, “I don’t remember asking for your input.”
“You could really use it though. Seems like you’re pretty fucking clueless at the fact that you’re a lot better than that asshole,” He rolled his eyes annoyed at the fact she couldn’t see how this escapade will end in heart break. He was only looking out for her so he doesn’t understand why she was so annoyed.
She chuckled bitterly, “Yeah like you care, besides I can find out for myself Rafe. I don’t need you telling me what’s good for me or not.”
Rafe rolled his eye because to him he did know what was good for her and Fabian was not. “Well when he ends up hurting you I’ll be ready to tell you I told you so,” He smirked taking a sip of his beer and walking away.
Sarah scoffed muttering, “Hate him.”
Y/n sighed watching him walk away and talk to her dad, “Couldn’t agree with you more.”
The first few years she knew Rafe she hated him. As much as you could hate him. He had always been extremely handsome, something she definitely noticed, and as he got older he became even hotter. In front of her parents he was charming and they interpreted his cocky demeanor as confidence. Whenever she complained about the Cameron boy being a prick they said they liked that Rafe knew what he wanted and always went for it, something that y/n could learn from him.
After she went away to college these family dinners became much smaller with only the parents and younger siblings. The kids having grown up and gone their own ways. Rafe was always on the mainland taking care of his dad’s business. Sarah had gone off to college so it was practically an empty nest. Occasionally during holiday breaks Sarah and y/n would join them for game night or dinner but Rafe still wasn’t around much.
She couldn’t lie and say he didn’t swim in her thoughts every now and then. Okay maybe more often then she’d like. Especially when he’d post on instagram and his bright smile would infect her mind on the nights she couldn’t fall asleep. She wondered if he ever thought about her but she doubted it since they never liked each other.
Rafe thought about her every day. Whenever he’d see her dad he’d find a way to bring her into conversation. He knew she was coming back soon and he made a note in his calendar to free his schedule on family dinner day because he wanted to see her. He needed to see her. Even if she probably didn’t want to see him because he remembers her hatred for him when they were teenagers. It makes a smirk appear on his lips as he thought about y/n rolling her eyes and sending witty comebacks his way.
-
It was winter break of her junior year of college when she made if back to the outer banks.
Y/n was surprised to see him drinking a glass of scotch with her dad and Ward as she walked downstairs. Her family was hosting dinner that time. Her first thought when she spotted hime was person he was even more handsome. His boyish look almost completely gone now that he was a man. She noticed he had been working out because his chest and shoulders seemed broader. Could have even gotten taller?
“Hey there she is,” Ward said as she made it all the way down the steps.
She smiled politely and joked, “Here I am, hope you didn’t miss me too much.”
Rafe smirked taking a sip from his glass. After Ward asked her more questions about college and the internship she was starting on the mainland that following summer. She could feel Rafe’s eyes on her as she talked to his dad. Seeing him had felt different that time. There was something different in the air.
During dinner they both stole glances at each other. Sometimes when she’d catch him staring at her he wouldn’t look away. Locking his eyes with her smirking and sipping on his second glass of scotch. His long fingers wrapped around the glass grabbed her attention. She watched his adams apple bob as he swallowed. No guys she knew in college drank scotch, because none of them were men like him.
He couldn’t believe how much more beautiful she had gotten in the last three years. She was a woman now and she held herself with so much more confidence than when she was seventeen. Rafe liked that.
“Oh honey give Rafe a tour of the new wine cellar. It is so magnificent our architect is amazing, maybe you’ll like him for a new Cameron employee,” Y/n’s mom said to the young adults who had been eye fucking for the last forty minutes. Y/n’s mom had been feeling her second glass of wine now which led to her being all giddy and generous. It’s always what her mom did. So whenever they went to charity events her mom just needed a glass of wine to sign a check for $10,000.
She was also an avid wine collector so for the last year they had been building a wine cellar under the house. It turned out beautiful. All wood and the lighting was moody. There were racks of wines all around the room and a few in the middle creating ailse. There were also a few big wooden support beams.
“Sure mom. Follow me,” Y/n said nodding her head towards the back. He smirked standing up and following her a few paces behind so he could stare at her back side. She led him out to the side of the house where the entrance was. If her mom knew what she ultimately helped happen she’d kill the both of them. Mostly for committing such a sin next to her most prized possessions.
Ten minutes into the tour Rafe had y/n pinned against one of those wooden beams. Her legs wrapped around his waist with her hands in his hair tugging whenever he’d hit that spot she could never reach on her own. No college guy she had been with was ever able to hit that spot either. Their breaths mixed together as their faces were close together, y/n’s skirt bunched around her waist. One of his hands was under her shirt tweaking her nipple.
His dick inside of her smoothly sliding in and out as he fucked her. Rafe knew he would never forget this moment. Never forget just how wet she had been, all the noises she was making sounding heavenly.
The first time was erotic. Years of built up sexual tension was finally getting released and it felt so good. His hands, his lips, his body felt better than she could ever have imagined.
When they were done Rafe kissed her, lips slotting naturally with her like they always belonged there. She was worried it was a one time thing but he wasn’t acting like it. That bubble of anxiety in her chest popping as he continued to be sweet to her. He had slowly pulled out and set her down gently. Tugging her skirt back down and helping her step into her panties he had tugged off in a frenzy. He fixed himself as she fixed her hair and makeup.
“That’s not the last time that’s gonna happen,” He said breaking the silence, “I like you too much to let you go.”
-
Since the first night they hooked up they have been sneaking around behind their families backs seeing each other. Rafe flew and road tripped to her apartment more times that winter and spring than he can count. When she came back for the summer he was practically living at her house. He’d sneak in at night like they were teenagers and he’d sleep over or stay up talking with her until she fell asleep then he’d sneak out. Or sometimes (a lot of times) they’d be doing something else that involved rafe’s mouth on her.
When y/n got her internship he’d meet her for lunch. They’d hangout in secluded areas on the beach and whenever they wanted to have a nice date night they’d stay a few cities over for the weekend to be alone and be a couple in public. For her birthday Rafe took her to the Amalfi coast for a few days where they spent most of the time on a boat, in a pool, or in bed having amazing sex. Y/n told her parents she was going to the lake for the weekend where she’d barely have service. Somehow they believed it.
They kept it a secret not because their families would be upset. It’s the opposite actually, they’d be too excited. Then there would be all this pressure on their relationship. The mom’s and Ward would be urging Rafe to propose because their families merging would make them look incredibly good and powerful in the developing industry. They’d want a huge wedding with a bunch of people they don’t know. There’d start to be talk about grand babies. All of figure eight would be talking about the kook prince and princess dating and on their way to live off their trusts. It would just be too much.
It was the last dinner party of the summer and Y/n was giddy. She hadn’t seen Rafe in two weeks because he had gone away on a business trip with his dad and then she had gone on to see her grandparents in New York. It was the most time they had spent a part in the last four months.
Tonight would be the last night they see each other for another couple weeks while y/n moves into her senior year apartment and settles into school. Rafe knew how important school was to her so he wanted to give her space to settle which she was grateful for because pre law was not easy. It would also be too suspicious if he randomly showed up to help while her parents are there.
This was a big dinner party so it was perfect. Y/n’s parents were hosting so it was all perfect. Every big family on Figure Eight, even the ones who only summer there, was at her house. The house was filled with many distractions since her mother also loved collecting art. No one would see them sneak upstairs to her room, especially with all the wine that’s being consumed.
Rafe had been dreaming about touching her since he last saw her. Oh and when he saw her he didn’t even waste a moment. As soon as he saw an opportunity to drag her upstairs to her bedroom he did. It was when appetizers were brought out and everyone had gathered outside. Y/n smirked the whole time knowing he wanted her as bad as she wanted him. Her short dress definitely did the job it was supposed to when she spotted his hard on when he first grabbed her.
His eagerness showing when he practically slammed her against the inside of the bedroom door. His lips on hers with fervor. They moved expertly against each other. Immediately finding their rhythm, no matter how many times they have each other it’s never enough.
His hands sliding down her waist and slowly going under her sundress. That’s when he feels nothing. She wasn’t wearing any panties. He instantly got harder and groaned into her mouth.
“You’re so fucking sexy,” He mumbled as he began trailing kisses down her neck.
Her hands tugged at his hair, “I missed you Rafey,” she whined not even feeling the slightest bit embarrassed about her eagerness. She had missed him so much.
He began walking her towards the bed. His lips still latching onto any exposed skin on her chest. They kicked their shoes off in the process, Rafe undid a few more buttons of his shirt. His tanned broad chest making her breathing uneven. When her knees hit the end of the bed she sat back crawling backwards towards the pillows. He followed her his knees spreading her legs.
“I missed you baby,” He gently cupped her face and stroked her cheek softly, “I can’t wait to make you cum.”
The soft gesture with the dirty words made her cheeks feel hot. That devilish smirk appearing on Rafe’s face like he knew that would happen. And that’s because he did know. Rafe knew her body and he knows just what to do to make her squirm. He looked too hot for her to even care how dirty he sounded. Sometimes she’d shy away but other times it made her putty in his hands. Y/n reached forward kissing him not so gently. They’d have time for the lovey dovey stuff later.
He began kissing down her body. Her chin then her neck, paying attention to that spot that made her hips jerk up for relief. His hand were gliding up her legs pushing her dress up around her waist in the process.
Rafe kissed her shoulders as he pushed her straps down in a teasing manor. He kissed her collarbones then her chest. Finally moving to her stomach and her pelvic bone. Oh had he missed this. His hands moved to her knees spreading her legs wider.
Y/n’s hands were in his hair already tugging. Giving an even harder tug when he reach forward giving her a teasing lick. She had to cover her mouth with one hand to not be loud.
Rafe wanted to tease her but he just couldn’t resist. He dove right in. His tongue finding her clit immediately, moving his tongue in circles. He alternated between that and licking down her slit. Tongue teasing her entrance. It was all so euphoric.
Her back arched off her bed. Y/n tried her best to keep quiet but a few moans slipped out. She hoped the chatter and music playing downstairs was enough to cover her noises. Rafe hummed against her core making the feeling even more intense.
“Oh god Rafey,” She sighed dreamily, “I missed your mouth. Know just what to do.”
He lives for the praise. It boosted his ego and encouraged him to do better and outdo himself. Hearing her breathy wins and moans muffled by her own hand were making him impossibly hard.
As he sucked and licked her clit he reached around and abruptly slipped a finger into her wet center. Her thighs practically suffocating him as he moved in and out of her touching that perfect spot inside of her. He always made her cum and he always did it fast. Before she met Rafe she had only ever finished with her own hand or vibrator.
“I’m gonna cum!” She whisper shouted.
Rafe moaned, “Cum for me baby.”
It felt like electricity was going through her body as she came. His movements relentless until he knew she was satisfied. He began to slow down as she came down, leaving her with one final lick. He kissed the inside of her thighs softly before crawling up to her again. She pulled him forward needing his lips on hers. She moaned at her taste on his tongue.
“I need to be inside you,” Rafe groaned as he felt one of her hands reach down and palm him through his pants.
“Please fuck me,” She batted her eyelashes at him knowing it always got her what she wanted.
He groaned again before sitting back on his feet so he can unbutton the rest of his shirt. Y/n sat up pulling her dress all the way off. Rafe made quick work of his pants pulling them down his legs.
His member slapped against his stomach, her mouth watering at the sight. Rafe was created with care, everything about him was perfect to her. He grabbed his length pumping it a few times before he rubbed his tip through her folds. Spreading her wetness around, his eyes rolled back at the feeling.
“Oh please please put it in,” She whined, “I need you so bad Rafey.”
“Baby your wish is my command,” He smirked and thrusted into her slowly pushing in inch by inch.
“Yes yes yes yes,” She chanted in pure bliss. Y/n didn’t care how desperate she sounded.
Rafe sighed as he began moving slowly. She was so tight and warm, even better than he remembered. He knew he wasn’t going to last long but he would make sure she came again before he did at all. He hit that spot inside of her that made her eye’s roll back and toes curl.
“Taking me so good my love,” Rafe encouraged as he picked up speed.
He grabbed one of her boobs and brushed his thumb over her hardened nipple. He leaned down and placed the other one in his mouth sucking and licking gently. All of the stimulation had her body feeling like it was on fire. He released it with a pop and went back to capture her lips in his. Y/n’a hands gripped his hair and clawed his back
“I’m gonna cum babe,” She moaned, “Yes right there, oh oh god.”
“Yeah baby cum for me,” He sighed, “Fuck I’m gonna cum too.”
Her eyes rolled back at his words, “Please cum in me, fill me up please please,” she blubbered feeling overwhelmed by the orgasm that was about to take over her body. The sounds of his deck sliding in and out of her wet pussy made him reach the edge. Everything about her was so sexy from the noises she made to the way she looked sprawled out below him.
Her words made him pick up his pace pounding into her. He felt her clench around him knowing she was coming. She moaned and scratched his back as she came. Biting her lip to not let anymore loud noises slip out of her. He came inside of her with a groan. Rafe continued to pump in and out of her slowing down as he came down from his high.
He swore he could cum again just looking at her all fucked out. Her hair all over the place, lipstick smudged and probably all over his face.
After a few minutes of catching their breaths Rafe pulled out gently. A whine leaving her lips at the empty feeling. Rafe got up going to her bathroom to get a towel to clean her up. When he came back he dabbed her center cleaning up.
“I missed you so much Rafe,” Y/n said breaking the silence.
He leaned forward kissing her knee, “I missed you more my love.”
“You think anyone heard?”
He shrugged, “Don’t think so. If they did then oops.”
She laughed, “Don’t say that Rafe, then we will get caught.”
He smirked as he laid next to her again opening his arms as an invitation that she gladly took. Resting her head on his chest and he leg wrapped around his waist. One of his hands stroking her hair and the other rubbing up and down her body slowly feeling all her exposed skin.
“Lets lay a few minutes then get back to hearing my dad talk about business for hours,” Y/n said savoring the feeling of laying with him.
“I love you,” He kissed the crown of her head a few times.
She smiled, “I love you. Sneak over tonight?” She asked looking up at him hopefully.
“Read my mind,” He smirked.
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miniwheat77 · 10 months
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Brat. (dbf!Captain Price x Reader.)
!CW! NSFW, Smut, oral sex (f receiving), using worms as bait, age gap, (sorry if I missed any)
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Your body feels warm, the hot sun beating down on you as you swam with one of your friends in her swimming pool. You had one as well but her parents weren't as strict as yours so you spent most of your time there.
You had just turned 18 but since you still lived with them for the time being you had no other choice but to follow their rules. You still had a curfew, had to tell them when and where you were going and what time you would be home. They still had to approve of it of course. Although they rarely ever told you no anymore since you were 18.
Your dad sat at an old wooden bar in and old dive bar him and his best friend, John Price liked to hang out in. They've been neighbors for years and years and it's essentially how their friendship started. They spent every holiday, game day, barbecue, and family get together with each other since then. They got along well, never fought. John was invited to everything and since he didn't have a family of his own it wasn't too hard for him to show. He wasn't married, had no kids, and lived too far away from his parents and siblings to plan the flights. He also didn't know when he'd be deployed but since he took on a job on the base and was only backup for missions, he was always home. Usually worked a 9-5 on the base. It was out of the ordinary for him and apart of him felt useless but it paid the bills. He was still there if they needed him anyways.
You dad was tipping the whiskey back like it was water which only meant one thing. Something was stressing him out.
John smiles after drinking some of his own bourbon. "Something going on mate?" He asks your dad. "Ah yeah. Y/N has been driving me crazy lately." He groans. "Me and her mom." He laughs. John tilts his head in confusion. "What's been going on?" He asks. "If you don't mind me asking of course."
"To be honest? I don't know. She's just been a real grouch lately. Has an attitude, doesn't listen, complains all the time. We've given her much more freedom since she turned 18 so I'm not sure where it's coming from." He shrugs. John nods his head. He's still listening. "I mean.. we convinced her to go to the doctor to get a few scans and blood work done, thinking maybe it was hormone imbalance or a mood disorder but those all came back fine and seemed to piss her off even more to be honest." He shrugs. "She got something going on in her personal life? Maybe she's fighting with a friend or boyfriend?" John asks. Your dad shakes his head. "She hates guys her age. Hates pretty much everyone she isn't close with anyways. She always said she won't date until she's older after her first boyfriend but I mean. She was like 12 so it was stupid anyways. She's only got a couple close friends and that's where she is right now. I don't know what it is." He tips back another shot of whiskey.
"Must just be moody. Maybe you guys should come out to the lake with me this weekend. I’m taking the boat out.” He shrugs. “Yeah that sounds good.” Your dad smiles. “Maybe getting out of the house will help her out.” He shrugs.
“I don’t know, I just know she’s in my damn nerves.” He laughs. Once they finish up their drinks, they part ways. Driving down the same roads to get home since they were neighbors. They’d usually carpool together but they’d met after work. When your dad arrives home, you’re home already. Watching a show on the couch. He closes the door behind him as he steps inside, smiling when he sees you. “Hey. John invited us out to go fishin this weekend. I said we’d go.” He smiles. “Do I have to?” You mumble. “Yes.” A grumble leaves your lips. “I’m not sure what the attitude is but it better quit young lady.” You roll your eyes, going upstairs to your room. Throwing yourself back on your bed with a groan.
John smiles at your dad, he’s sitting up at the front of the boat. You’re laying on your stomach, bikini leaving little to the eyes, you’ve got a pair of sunglasses on and you haven’t spoken much the entire trip. “John, you mind letting me off at the doc? I’m gonna go get another case of beer.” He nods his head, starting up the boat and making his way to shore. He lets your dad off, letting him know he’s going to go back out with you and to let him know when to come get him. When he’s back out on the lake and the anchor is down, he flips his hat around. Scooping up some water with his hand and flicking it all over you. He draws a gasp from your lips and you turn around, “John what the hell!” You gasp. Wiping the water down. “Cmon kid. You’re driving your poor ol’ man nuts. What’s with the attitude?” He crosses his arms, lazy smile playing at his lips. “I don’t have an attitude. Why does everyone keep saying that?” You roll your eyes. “Oh come on. The eye rolling, talking back, ignoring people when they talk to you. Being a real brat little lady.” He teases. You grumble, laying back down. “Nope. Cmon. You’re gonna try fishing. You’ll have fun.” He picks up a fishing pole. “We’re using worms. I mean.. you can use power bait but the stocked fished are smaller than natural spawn fish. It’s up to you.” He shrugs, holding out the styrofoam container that has the worms in it. You sigh, taking it from him. “You want me to show you how to put a worm on?” He asks. “Yeah sure.” You mumble. “Alright, here. You basically just thread it through the top.” You watch him hook the worm and thread it on, watching as it squirms. You take the pole from him, casting it out into the water and waiting.
Pretty soon, there’s a boat full of younger guys creeping up near you. They cat call you, yelling out obscenities at you. You ignore them, rolling your eyes. John is a little amused because he knows what your dad has said about guys your age and how you hate dating. They leave just as quickly as they come. “Can we just home? This is boring.” You roll your eyes. “No, not until we catch some fish.” He laughs.
This is where he starts to see it.
When you think he’s not paying attention, you’re adjusting yourself. Sliding awkwardly on the seat, rubbing up against your fishing pole for any sort of friction. Acting more and more bratty as the time ticks on. It’s amusing to John really, to see just how frustrated you are. “Where is my dad? He’s been gone a long time.” John shrugs. He pulls out his phone. He notices a text from your dad, seeing that he’s received a text from him a few minutes before.
You mind giving Y/N a lift home? Her mom texted me and said she took a bad fall at work and is in the ER.
Yeah no problem at all, see you later mate.
“He said your mum fell at work so he’s going to go see if she’s okay. It’s just me and you kid.” John sits down. “So we can go home now?” You ask. “No.” He laughs. You mutter something under your breath. He laughs. Your fishing pole bobbing startles you and John perks up. "You got a fish!" You set the hook, yanking the fishing pole and starting to reel it in. The fish puts up a pretty good fight and when you reel it closer to the boat, John scoops it up with the fishing net for you. Helping you get it off the hook. "Look at that darling." He smiles as you pick it up. "Good girl, see? This is fun." He smiles. His statement takes you off guard, cheeks heating up. "Uh.. Yeah. Whatever." You shut down quickly. He thinks it's odd at first. Once you've thrown the fish back into the water, he sits down across from you at the front of the boat.
He looks around, making sure no one else is around. “Look. I know what’s going on.” He smiles. “Yeah? And what’s that?” You look at him. “Well.. I’m putting two and two together here. The attitude, the never wanting to go out.” He smirks. You look up at him. “I mean.. you’ve been grinding up against your fishing pole since I gave it to you. Rubbing your thighs together when that boat full of guys came by.” Your lips part slightly, cheeks going red. "And when I called you a good girl." He chuckles, seeing how you start to squirm from his watchful eyes on you. “Do you not know how to make yourself cum sweetheart?” He laughs. "T-that's inappropriate John." You look away from his gaze, thankful your sunglasses help conceal your embarrassment. He laughs. "Oh come on, what your dad doesn't know won't hurt him, besides. You've been on his nerves lately and if I help you out, maybe he won't be so stressed out. So talk to me." He smiles. You stay quiet and he moves across the boat, sitting right next to you, throwing an arm over your shoulders. "You can talk to me darling. I can help you." Your heart rate picks up, it's racing in your chest. "I.. I don't know what you want me to say." You breathe. You're one step away from panting at his close proximity. The only thing you can think about are his hands on you. "Have you ever had sex before?" He asks. You shake your head. "Have you.. done anything at all?" You shake your head again. "I've tried to it myself but it makes it worse." You look down at your hands nervously playing with them.
He smiles. Right now, John is thankful there is a room below on his boat. "I can show you." He rests his hand on your thigh, feeling you stiffen up under his touch. "O-okay." You breathe. "Come on." He grasps your hand. There aren't many boats left on the water, it's getting late in the day and everyone is going home thankfully, you might get a little loud. He pulls you down the small set of stairs into the cabin of the boat. It's really small. He makes sure to wash his hands before he touches you, having you do the same.
There's a small bed and a table and chairs and that's it. "Lay on your back." You swallow hard, getting up onto the bed. His deep voice has your clit throbbing at the attention it knows it's about to get. You're sure you've soaked through your panties. He leans onto the bed, helping you remove your bathing suit. When your bottom half is exposed to him, he wants to drool. "God you're beautiful." He groans. He glides his hands down your exposed thighs, causing chills to rise on your skin. You're panting now, small gasps leaving your lips. "Relax." He chuckles. "I'm going to help you, try to calm down sweetheart. You're too eager." He runs his fingertips over your skin, his touch is searing, it burns your skin as his fingers move across you. You want his hands on you. You want them inside of you. He takes a deep breath of his own, trying to ignore the way his cock throbs against his cargo shorts. "Start slow. Little circles on your clit." He reaches forward. "Like this." He breathes. He uses his thumb, rubbing circles over you. Your lips part slightly, a whimper leaving your lips. It’s different when he’s touching you. You can feel your lower stomach swirling, something is building already. “You try.” He draws his hand away. Resting your hand over your mound, rubbing circles over your clit just as he said. The sensation is gone just as fast as it came, causing you to whimper out at the loss, your touch feels like nothing. You draw your hand away. “This isn’t going to work John, it doesn’t work.” You blush.
You try to sit up but he pushes you back. “Have you ever cum before?” He asks. You shake your head. “Oh darling.. no wonder you’re so bratty.” He smiles. “All of that sexual tension and no way to release it. Poor thing.” He’s teasing you, but at the same time actually feels really bad. He knows it’s harder for you to cum. “Stop it John.” You try to push him off, tears gathering in your eyes from frustration. “I’m just teasing darling, let me help you.” He moves himself up further, grasping your thighs and pulling you down on the bed further, you let your head rest back on the pillow, looking up at the ceiling. The boat rocks back and fourth over the water. You’re nervous. You don’t know what he’s going to do to you. He moves himself between your legs, and you don’t understand what's going on until you feel something warm and wet against your entrance. You lift your head up, jumping at the sensation. “Oh f-fuck!” You gasp. He glances up at you. He’s still got his hat on, but he’s flipped it backward by now. Giving himself room to devour you. He moans into your opening, you taste sweet. You’re breathing hard, clutching at the sheets as he flicks his tongue over your clit. He starts slow, letting your sensitive nub get used to the sensation of his tongue, not wanting to overwhelm you. You clutch at the sheets, melting further and further into him as he laps at your entrance with his tongue. It's clear that he's had a fair share of experience. You feel something building in your stomach and you know you're about to cum.
You're getting louder and louder, crying out his name and he's never imagined himself in such a position.
This is just to help her dad, so that he isn't so stressed out.
That's all.
John rocks his hips into the bed, cock hard and throbbing against his shorts. Begging for some kind of friction. He imagines your pretty lips around his cock, maybe your pretty eyes looking up at him as you take him further down your throat. He groans into you earning another moan from your lips. When you're wet enough from his spit and your arousal, he slides a couple of his fingers into you. Feeling you tense up around him, all of the air leaving your lungs, you've never had anything inside before and he can't help but smile into you.
He sucks against your clit, swirling his tongue around it, you're squirming, struggling to stay still beneath him, even his grip on you doesn't keep you completely still. He sucks your clit into his mouth one more time, lapping his tongue over you, his fingers curling into the sweet spot inside of you and you lose it, lips parting as moans leave your lips. A mewl leave your lips and you squirm out of his grasp as he desperately laps up your arousal from your orgasm. You push him away, closing your legs. You're looking at him with a look of pure shock, panting, a little sweaty. The look you're giving him it's unsettling how fucked out you look. He wipes his lips of you, looking up at you. "Do you feel better?" He laughs. You nod your head. "Good. Try to relax." He smiles. "Still got about an hour of light left, let's make it worth while and try to catch some fish yeah?" He smiles, standing up. When he's out of your line of sight, he sucks the taste of you off of his fingers. Groaning at himself.
What has he just gotten himself into?
1K notes · View notes
sserajeans · 6 months
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bff premium?
kang haerin x fem! reader
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synopsis: after distancing yourself from a friend you've unfortunately fallen for, the rest of the group catches onto her sour mood, and all fingers point to you
genre + others: fluff, mutual pining, friends to lovers, non-idol au, high school setting, friend group is rly just nwjns + yn
notes: i swear yail update will come i just had this in my drafts and felt bad for not posting for a while!!, requested, IM SO SORRY IT TOOK THIS LONG I REALLY WANTED TO BE IN TBE MOOD WHEN I WROTE THIS 😭😭😭😭 luckily haerin posted some pics that ive gotten completely insane over.. so!
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you and haerin always had something special between the both of you.
you two met in middle school, when your homeroom teacher was assigning seats. she was a quiet kid, and so were you, but one of you had to get over it. so when the class was given a paired activity to "get-to-know each other", you were forced to come out of your shell, and haerin welcomed you (surprisingly) warmly.
it started off as a strictly-seatmate type of friendship, where you two would only interact whenever it was needed. but as you spent more and more time working on assigned activities together, you were beginning to realize that maybe you enjoyed her company more than you thought, and so did she.
eventually, you two began spending time together outside of class; during recess, lunchtime, sometimes after class in the library. it didn't take long until the both of you became really close, a known tandem. you were her closest friend, she was yours, and everyone knew that.
over time, your friends became hers as well, and so whenever everyone was free, your little friend group composed of minji, hanni, danielle, haerin, hyein, and you, would hang out together. at a clubroom, the courtyard, the gymnasium, a cafe, the cafeteria, anywhere.
but no matter how many close friends surrounded you two, it seemed clear to anyone that you were closer to each other than anyone else. the same way hanni was to hyein, and minji was to danielle.
now your feelings for haerin grew a couple years later, and you only admitted them to yourself in your sophomore year of high school. that's about four years or so since you two met, and about a year ago from today.
from the beginning, you had always found haerin pretty. it wasn't hard to admit. she was nice to look at, and the way her cat-like eyes turned into crescent moons whenever she smiled ear to ear... yeah, you knew you were enjoying it a little too much.
and it only worsened the more you got to know each other, because you found out there were so many things to adore.
the way she wouldn't stop talking about frogs, her love for tomatoes, her eyes and the way she blinks slowly when she looks at something she loves (a cat-like habit you picked up when she was watching a recipe video for an avocado dish).
the list could go on and on if no one stopped you, and after talking about it to your mom (who was very supportive of everything, by the way), you came to the conclusion that you liked haerin, in a "more-than-a-friend way".
but you had no idea, not a single clue, on what to do with that realization. what would happen if you told her? if you didn't? would she feel the same? would she be disgusted if she didn't?
crushes and romance was one of the most untouched conversation topics between the two of you, so you had no idea if she was even open to such ideas.
but the one thing you knew for sure, was that she was your best friend, and you were hers. you loved your best friend, and so did she. in a different way, or not, you felt like she still deserved to know. you hated hiding things from her, and history proves it only made things worse whenever you did.
so you decided to confess. great!
and suddenly you see her acting all lovey dovey with danielle.
well, in retrospect, they weren’t exactly being lovey dovey, and you kind of knew that.
danielle was just big on affection, as she was to everyone, and is one of the few people whose pda was complied with (or tolerated) by haerin.
and despite not being much of a pda fan, in that moment, you badly wanted to be in danielle’s place, comfortably smothering your best friend with all the love in the world.
oh, and it didn’t help that people started a couple rumors about them being a couple.
sure, everyone knew you were each other’s number one, each other’s best of best friend, but the way you two showed affection with each other was very different from the way danielle does, to again, everyone, but you didn’t care about that.
the bitter sting in your stomach seeing the two of them made you realize that it was probably a much better idea to just get rid of your feelings (you’re an idiot, you’ve had them for years. they won’t just go away). after all you didn’t want to ruin what you had with two of your closest friends.
and with that goal in mind, so began your plan to avoid kang haerin at all costs!
you’re really stupid.
in the process of avoiding haerin, you indirectly were avoiding the rest of the girls too. you mostly hung out with your other classmates from different subjects like woonhak and eunchae. and whenever you were asked about it by hanni (mostly), you shrugged it off and said it was just “school things you needed help with”.
it was a dumb excuse. everyone knew you were at least top 5 of the class. and what kind of help were you getting if you were going out to places like arcades and karaoke spots anyways?
the girls were bothered, but not as much as haerin was. she was often visibly in a sour mood, ate half of her usual cafeteria servings, and would talk a lot less than she already did.
they were worried for the both of you simultaneously, but hyein and minji put two and two together, which only doubled their worry.
initially, it was just you and haerin's separate well-being they were concerned about, but now that they realized the time frame in which you began distancing yourself matched up with when haerin's mood went down, they were now also worried about what could've happened between you two.
so they took it amongst themselves to at least know what was going on.
"haerin-ah."
"haerin."
"kang."
"kang haerin!"
haerin looked up from her untouched tray of food, her chopsticks poking around slices of beef in sauce.
"hm?"
minji sat across her as the first two to arrive in their usual lunch table.
"i was asking if anything happened between you and y/n or something..."
"oh..."
haerin looked back down and continued playing around with her food before sighing and looking back up, muttering a couple words.
"wish i knew."
"y/n-unnie! is something up between you and haerin-unnie?"
"huh? what?" you were sat in the sound proofed booth of the music room, guitar plugged in an amplifier. you squinted at hyein's figure from outside the room, putting your guitar on its stand and motioning her to come inside.
"can you repeat that? i can't really hear anything from in there..." scratching the back of your neck, you gave hyein a seat from behind the booth's drum sets.
"i was asking!" hyein took a deep breath, you raised your eyebrows signaling her to continue. "if you and haerin-unnie have something going on."
"h-huh? what? what something?"
"no not like that! i meant you know, did you fight or... 'cause she's been so sour lately! she wouldn't even give me her leftover tomatoes... she wasn't even gonna eat them! like at all!"
the expression on your face shifted to what most would identify as worry and concern.
"...she hasn't been eating the tomatoes? she loves those..."
"yeah! and so much more! anyways, minji-unnie and i deduced it was about you, so here i am." hyein gleamed with pride while you chuckled in amusement.
you leaned over to mess with the top of her head and sighed, "i'll talk to her. you don't worry about a thing, okay?"
and you kept your word to the younger girl. how could you not?
you spotted haerin alone in one of the clubrooms, cleaning up some of the materials they used for the day. knocking on the room's door startled her a bit, given by the minor flinch, but she relaxed seeing it was you.
still, you could tell her facial expression was slightly guarded, and it hurt you, but you definitely deserved it.
she turned back around to continue organizing the materials into three separate boxes, not saying a word.
"hyein said you haven't been eating the tomatoes in your lunch." you slowly took your steps towards her and stopped when you were a couole steps away on the other side of the desk she used to arrange the items. "or your lunch at all..."
she paused to look up at you and give you a short glare, before walking to move a box to the teacher's desk in the room. you followed a few steps behind her, arms behind your back as your fingers fiddled with each other.
"you shouldn't... skip your meals, you know..." you muttered, clearly intimidated by haerin’s cold facade. "health... you need to eat..."
seeing as how you still had no reply, you decided it was probably best to just go straight to the point.
"hey... i'm sorry..."
you were used to haerin not saying that much, especially when you got to know her more and she explained that it was simply just too tiring. but you were also always the exception to that.
whenever it was just the two of you, one would be surprised to see haerin as the louder one. talkative, always rambling about something, while you smiled, nodded, and gave comments whenever necessary.
"yangi, please say something"
haerin loved that nickname more than anything. it was pretty foul to pull that card, actually. you came up with it when you two were having a friendly debate over what animal she resembled.
"i don't know where you're getting cat, y/n."
"are you crazy? how are you getting frog!"
"literally everything!"
"no. you're simply incorrect. you're literally a cat in human form!"
"absolutely not!"
"whatever you say, goyangi."
"what did you just call me?"
"go-yang-i. goyangi. go. yangi."
"you're so... annoying."
"okay, yangi."
she let out a frustrated sigh, looking up at you with what felt like her eyes piercing through your soul.
"so you get to disappear on me without a word, but i have to reply when you speak to me for the first time in 8 days?"
yes, she's been counting the days.
but wouldn't you be too if she did the same?
well, you probably would've confronted her a little sooner. but it's not that haerin didn't care enough to do something about it, she just genuinely didn't want to overstep space you might've been needing.
"thats what i thought." she let go of the box, turned her back, and walked back to the desks to grab the 2nd box.
"look... i'm sorry, i really am." you immediately caught up to her with a few steps, eyes pleading with nothing but guilt.
"if you are then can you at least tell me why you were avoiding me?"
she stared at you, observing how your thumbs rubbed over your fingers, or how your breathing got a little heavy, both nervous habits she picked up.
noting how you probably weren't going to say much anytime soon, she let go of the 2nd box to face you.
"you're my best friend, y/n"
that hurt didn't it?
a reminder that that was probably all you were going to be to her.
"do you know how..." haerin took a deep inhale, it was beginning to get shaky. her mind was a mess, thinking of the best words to express the hurt you made her feel over the past few days. but she couldn't.
"nevermind."
knowing the way haerin acted added on to your internal conflict. haerin usually wasn't afraid to speak her mind when it was just the two of you, but now she is. she couldn't. and you knew it was your fault.
but were you really ready to tell her you liked her? now? you wanted to show her you were sorry, but it really wasn't that easy.
if things go wrong, she could continue the game and avoid you forever. and just like that you'd lose your best friend, ruining the group's dynamics as well.
but you figured your brain was just making up excuses for you to not tell her out of fear. what mattered the most now was letting her know you were sorry, and that hurting her was never part of the plan.
"look, i'll tell you, because i really truly am sorry for hurting you," you start off, hands in the air motioning whatever. "but i-... i need you to promise me..."
"what?" her voice was much softer now. still cold, but not sharp enough to make it feel like you were stabbed every time she spoke.
"that you won't be... weirded out, or disgusted, or leave the room. you'll talk about it with me."
"you're the one whos been avoiding the talking y/n, i hope you know that."
you often forget how quick she was with her words. it was like a whip. painful, fast, happens before you even noticed it did. you were just so used to her nicer side. she's never been frustrated with you.
"right..."
you took a deep breath, mentally composing a script of how you felt and how you were going to say it. just like the million times you've practiced to the mirror at home.
"i've been avoiding you 'cause i think i like you. or, well, i know i like you. in a more than a friend way. and i have been for a while, and i was going to tell you because i didn't like hiding things from you, but i saw you with dani one day and i just- i don't know. okay? it's stupid. i know she's like that with everyone, but i didn't like it when she was with you, so i decided that i'd rather just get rid of how i felt to make it easier and to not ruin any of our friendships. so i figured the only way to do that was if i didn't talk to you. clearly that affected us both in a way i didn't want or intend. i'm sorry i ignored you. it was selfish of me to not think about how you could've felt throughout everything."
haerin took a minute just standing there, trying to process the hell of a bomb of information you just dropped on her. her cheeks were gradually growing red the more she realized what you were trying to tell her.
"hey... hello... did you hear what i was saying... or do i have to repeat it... because i'd really rather not..." you waved your palm in front of the girl who seemed to be frozen in place. "but if that's what it takes then i guess tha—"
you stopped talking as haerin slowly approached you, wrapping her arms around your waist and burying her face on your shoulder. she was careful to do so slowly, giving you a chance to move away if you needed to. she knows you're not into physical touch, and it just wasn't exactly the norm for the two of you.
"i was worried."
"hey, i've been eating fine. it's you tha-"
"no, not that. i was worried you might've overheard dani and i talk about you when i told her i like you, and that you were disgusted by it and didn't want to be... associated with me because of it. and maybe you just didn't know how to tell me so you went with the silent treatment.... i was going nuts, y/n. that's why hyein was talking about skipping lunch and whatever. all i could think about was why."
you could feel the guilt eating you up bit by bit on the inside. it quite literally broke your heart to hear haerin, the girl with not a lot of words, express the effect of what you did. it was like acid, burning up your stomach, your chest, your head. except that acid was guilt.
"oh god... i'm so sorry, yangi... the whole thing was a really selfish move and— and i should've thought about you first. i really am so so sorry..."
you held her closer and softly shifted your body weight from one foot to the other, swaying the two of you softly, somewhat like a cradle calming a baby down to sleep.
"hey... it's okay... i know you didn't mean it. i'm just glad we're fine now."
you two stay in that position for a couple of minutes, feeling each other relax over time as a result of finally resolving the conflict you had caused.
that was until haerin broke the silence.
"so... hate to be the person to ask but..."
"what are we?"
the two of you laughed for a while at how the question was so cliche and cringe yet necessary.
"yes."
"bff premium?"
"y/n!"
"i'm kidding! i'm kidding! but... i say we take things slow? get a little used to this, whatever it is, whatever it could be?"
"yeah, i like that."
the two of you smiled at each other with nothing but warmth and care, before ultimately pulling in for another hug.
"minji-unnie you owe me 2,000 won."
"hyein you're being too loud."
"huh do you hea-?..." haerin pulled away with a surprised face, interrupted by y/n quickly stomping towards the door, slamming it open to reveal minji and hyein falling forward to the floor. a result of relying on the door for support.
"seriously? i expected hyein, but minji-unnie?" you sighed in disappointment, haerin walking over to see what the fuss was all about.
"listen, it's for hanni she placed bets too."
"...lame excuse."
"KANG HAERIN!"
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gojo-enthusiast · 6 months
Text
Kento Nanami ~
Wake Me Up
*Sleep Sex* MDI, 18+ Only! Kento wakes you up to a sweet surprise *😉* after working a long day fighting curses. Do not read if it triggers! Anyways, enjoy my first piece 😈
Word count: <2200
PSA: did not proof read, honestly I’m always horny for JJK men, so beware and stay tuned for more disgusting pieces. Also are we gonna talk about how fucking hot Nanami is in season 2???? Follow me on X (Twitter)
Like and reblog🫶🏻
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You had stayed awake until midnight, taken your shower, exfoliated, & shaved.
"Ken should be home anytime soon" checking your phone seeing the time
6:00 PM
Getting yourself all prepped and ready for him to come home to a sweet surprise. You had been aching all day long, this morning he had been loving on you, slowly caressing your thighs, and right when he was going to put his hands into your heat, his phone starts ringing,
“Fuck. Who is calling me?” He groans grabbing his phone, “What the fuck does Satoru want.” He groans once again. Your husband was not one to cuss often, only when he was upset, (usually at Satoru) or when he was fucking you.
“What is it Gojo-San?” Nanami ask begrudgingly,
“Nanamiiiiii-“ Satoru says in a shrill
You didn’t hear all that was said, but the moment the called ended, your husband stood up and kissed your forehead.
“So sorry my love, but I have to leave. I promise we will finish what we started when I get home.” He says smiling faintly.
“Everything okay?” You ask, wrapping the sheets around you as he gets in the shower to get ready to leave for another day of killing curses. A job you hated so much, but you knew that him working his office job, was only making him feel suffocated, and had no meaning to his life.
“Yeah, just some curses. Nothing to be worried about. Satoru is out of town, I have to take the new kid Yuuji Itadori with me today.” He says washing his face, you see the bubbles of the soap form, and sink down his skin to the drain. You look down, and see his member hard as a rock, he looked frustrated.
“You sure we can’t fix that before you go?” You smirk, “Don’t tease me, or you’ll regret it later on.” He groans, you watched as he slightly stroked it in the shower, you watched, knowing he was about to burst any second. He wanted to fuck you right then and there, but he knew if he did, he would be late, and he wouldn’t stop. And then there it was, he had finished all over his hand, the water washing it off.
“Fuck. I wish that was in me right now.” You moan, “Get out before you tempt me anymore.” He says as he looks away from you. You do as he says, you already know how hard working your husband is, that’s why you spent the whole day pampering yourself, getting a facial, getting your nails done, everything that would make you feel and look done up. You knew how much your husband loved to see you all dolled up and manicured. I mean he didn’t work so hard for nothing. He always wanted you to be able to feel spoiled, and go definitely spoil yourself with his money.
But little did you know, your husband would be working overtime today. And you would be passed out by the time he got home.
Hubby🩵: Baby I'm running late today, I promise I will be home as soon as I can. I love you. - 6:02PM
Your husband is always home by 6PM, so you knew if he wasn’t, it was definitely something a little more serious. But you know your husband, he’s a grade 1 sorcerer, he will be home in no time.
As you lay in bed, watching some trashy reality TV, trying to stay awake. You look over at the clock
11:46PM
You feel your eyes getting heavy, the red wine you had drank during dinner finally hit you. And next thing you know, you’re cuddled under the blankets to a pillow, asleep, wishing it was your husband.
It was 1 in the morning, and Nanami finally made it home. Walking inside the house, feeling sluggish, and ready to lay in bed next to his wife, and feel her warmth.
“I need to shower.” He mutters to himself. He steps into the guest bathroom, which he usually does after a mission, because he doesn’t want to get your shared bathroom dirty. Washing off his day, feeling his muscles finally loosen up.
His phone rings again, it’s Satoru;
“What the fuck do you want Satoru?” Nanami hisses, “hey hey calm down Nanami-San, I just wanted to thank you for taking Yuuji, and taking care of those curses. Get some rest, and some ass. Ijichi told me how grumpy you were today. Take the day off tomorrow.” Satoru giggles to himself, “Was planning on it, now leave me alone.” Nanami says back, hanging up.
His phone beeps, showing that he received a text message,
Satoru Gojo: YOUR WELCOME, have fun😼
Nanami: 🖕🏻
Satoru Gojo: 🫶🏻
He finally turns his phone off, wrapping the towel around his waist, walking out the restroom down the hall, to your shared bedroom. He knows you’re asleep, there’s no way you stayed up this late for him. He walks into the bedroom, and your bottom half is under the blankets, while your top half is completely nude, and you’re sprawled out.
“Fuck, where is your clothes?” He mutters, feeling his cock stiffen, becoming erect. He climbs into bed, leaning in kissing your lips, then kissing your cheek, to your neck. “Damn it, I can’t do this while she’s sleeping.” He groans.
You had always told him how you would love to wake up to him in between your legs, but Nanami was such a “consent” man, which you loved about him, he was so respectful to you, and treasured your body, but you sometimes just wanted him to take charge and do something that wasn’t so good boy / gentlemen behavior. He remembered the conversation as he stroked himself next to you, “fuck it.” He says to himself, taking the blanket off your body.
Seeing your white laced panties, his cock at this point was throbbing. “Such a pretty little thang aren’t you?” He whispers in the crook of your neck, climbing on top of you, placing kisses down your neck, going down to your breast, starting the suck on your nipples. Placing his teeth in between your nipple, slightly biting it. Causing a moan to come out of you, while you were asleep.
“Mmm dreaming about me baby? You should wake up so you can catch the live action.” He says swirling his tongue around your areola and nipple. He started the bring himself down to your heat, sliding your panties down swiftly. “Oh how I have craved to taste you all day.” He says opening your folds with his fingers, gently placing his tongue on your clit immediately. He knew your body more than you did, and he definitely knew where you liked it the most. He quickens the pace of his tongue, sucking on your clit, you’re moaning in your sleep. Dreaming of your husband in between your legs, he doesn’t stop, wanting to taste your juices all over his tongue. He starts to rub his index and middle finger on your clit, rubbing it up and down quickly, as his tongue dips into your hole, tasting you deeply. Your eyes start to flutter open, and you’re moaning loudly now, seeing your husband in between your legs. “Ken-kento. What are you- what- ugh yes.” You try to ask what he’s doing, but he has no desire to respond back to you, his only desire is to make you cum over and over until you have melted into him. That knot in your stomach has finally snapped, and your finishing all on his tongue, he flicks his tongue up, tasting every drop coming out. “Ffffuuuuucccckkkkkkk” you groan bucking your hips up, practically humping into his face. “Yes baby just like that.” He says, still rubbing your clit, and abusing your hole with his tongue. He had one of your legs pinned down with his free hand. And the other one, was pinned down by his elbow, as he was still flicking your clit. As he continues to abuse your poor clit into overstimulation, you feel yourself about to bust. And there it was, exactly what he was wanting. You to squirt all over him, “KENTOO-!” You loudly moan, “stop, oh my god.” You cry out in pure ecstasy. You look up and see his face dripping with your liquid.
“Fuck, that’s so hot.” He says licking his lips, wiping his face with his towel. “Nanami-“ you pant, “yes baby?” He says, moving up to you, positioning himself to enter. “I missed you.” You say, wrapping your arms around his neck, as he brings his head down and starts to kiss you, sticking his tongue in your mouth. “I missed you too baby.” He kisses down your neck, sucking on it, leaving hickies all over. Because why not?
“I tried staying up,-ugh, Kento I tried staying awake.” You moan, as he starts to slide himself inside slowly, he was big, not only did this man have a long cock, but the girth was the size of a coke can. So he always had to slowly go in, never forcing himself in too fast. “I’m sorry baby I was late- ugh, today was so-fuck, - it was- so-s-so stress-stressful.” He moans, feeling your walls clench around his throbbing cock, he felt like he could burst at any moment possible.
“Damn baby you feel so so good.” Kento says finally pushing that last inch inside of you. Stretching you out at full capacity. “This sweet pussy has been on my mind since this morning. Can’t believe I went the whole day.” He pants, starting to thrust faster, “yes Kento, just like that.” You’re moaning into his ear, “fuck me baby.” You say looking into his eyes.
And that was it, that was the string that kept your husband in control, once it snapped, he and you were done for. Your pussy was about to be his flesh light. He starts pounding into you, kissing your G-spot with each thrust, you had came 3 times in the last 30 minutes from his cock alone. He kept edging himself, you knew he didn’t want it to end. He would fuck you fast and hard, and as soon as he felt like he was about to bust, he was slowing down. “Kentoooo- cum inside of me.” You moan out, “not yet baby, I’m not ready to finish.” He groans, feeling himself overstimulating himself. “Baby you feel so good. We fit perfect for each other. You belong to me, do you understand?” He says, you know it’s not a question, it’s a fact. You are his, and he is yours. And he will kill anyone who tries to get in between you two. He even thought about killing Satoru, for calling him before he was supposed to even be up getting ready to leave.
“Kento, I love you.” You moan into his ear, cumming again for the 4th time, “yes princess, cum for me.” He moans, finally about to reach his high. He’s pounding into you, with no desire to stop. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, yes-yes, I’m gonna cum in you, princess.” He whimpers, groaning in your ear, “yes baby, cum in me.” Your moaning, and that’s when he finally does, shooting his hot cum deep inside of you. Feeling your chest go up and down. The sweat from his forehead dripping down.
“Damn, that felt amazing.” He pants, staying on top of you, not yet taking himself out of you. “It was.” Your panting in union with your husband. “I just showered too.” He laughed, finally rolling off of you, pulling you to him, to kiss you.
“I’m sorry I was so late today, today was long.” He sighs, kissing your nose. “That’s okay baby. I understand.” You say nuzzling your head into his sweaty chest, not a care in the world.
“Princess, let’s take a shower before bed. I’ll change the sheets when we get out.” He says lifting you up, seeing his cum drip from your core. “Fuck that’s so sexy.” He whispers to himself, caring you to the shower, turning it on.
“Princess?” He looks at you, as you step in the shower,
His cum is dripping down your thighs, and your cheeks are red. He felt his cock twitch in excitement, I mean you guys usually go a couple rounds, so what would hurt if you both went again.
“I know you’re tired, and I’m tired. But, I’m going to need you to bend over and hold the shower rail.” He says, you look over and you see his cock rock hard again.
“Yes daddy.” You smirk, you silently thanking the universe you told your husband to give you head while asleep. It was going to be an exceptionally long shower & long night.
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brodieland · 2 months
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.˚ 𓈒 ࣪.𝝑𝝔 Can we finally call a Truce? ´ˎ˗
Percy Jackson x Fem!Hades!Reader Synopsis: After hanging out, they are now calling each other friends. But now Percy's lonely at his dorm !!! Warning(s): some swearing Word Count: 3160
╰➤ MASTERLIST pt2
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After you kicked Percy out, you went to bed and crashed. And by crashed, you plopped on your stomach without changing and fell asleep till 9AM. Never have you been happier to not have a class today. When you finally woke up, you grabbed your phone to check your messages and saw Annabeth texted you five minutes ago.
'I'll be there in 15 minutes for breakfast :P'
Alright so you had ten minutes to get ready. As you got up to brush your teeth you kept going through your messages and saw one from.. Percy? Forgot you had his number honestly.
'yo Y/N, I had fun last night. u still suck tho LMAOO'
Oh okay.
'Ur a ball of sunshine yk that'
And with that you put your phone down and finished getting ready to meet Annabeth. While getting ready you were debating on whether or not you would've told her of last night. It's not like anything happened, but getting drunk till 1am with a boy might be seen a little.. you know. You also were debating on not telling her because it was actually kind of fun, to be fair you were insulting each other the whole time but it was funny.
'Knock, knock'
Gosh, pounding noises. You rushed over to the door and opened it to see the amazing Annabeth in all her glory. As she handed you a glorious treat, coffee, you guys headed to get some actual food.
"Thought I'd grab you a coffee since you missed the party to do homework, god knows how long you stayed up. Freakin scholar" Annabeth said. What a scholar I am, instead of finishing my late work, I got hammered with the one guy who absolutely turns my gears.
"Yeah about that, um, I didn't really do that much studying that night" you said. "I ended up drinking half a bottle of vodka till like, almost 2AM." You took the chance to take a big sip of your drink while Annabeth gave you such a perplexed look.
"Who the hell would spend the night drinking alone when there's a party going on with all your friends" Annabeth asked.
"Well I wasn't alone" you said, now Annabeth was really confused. "I was with Percy." As Annabeth screamed you took the chance to take another long sip of your coffee.
"What. You spent the night drinking with PERCY. What happened to" and here she goes with her air quotes "we hate each other?"
"We still do, we just put it a side for the night and got drunk, we were still insulting each other the whole time. Nothings changed" you stated calmly.
"Yeah okay. Clueless" Annabeth rolled her eyes.
"If you keep doing that, they're gonna get stuck like that" you both started laughing. Finally you made it to the cafeteria, where you saw Percy getting a donut. You decided to walk up to him.
"Wow, a donut already? Are you just big or hungover" you made yourself laugh as Annabeth caught up behind you her the banana she snagged.
"Well, the ladies like to say I'm big and hung if that's what your asking." Wow, just wow.
"Why do I even bother sometimes" you said while rubbing your temples.
"Because of how awesome and beautiful everyone says I am" Percy gloated.
"Oh right, then you woke up right" you smile and tilted your head while pointing at him.
"Are you only nice to me if I have alcohol" Percy asked while smiling.
"Perhaps, why? Do you have more" you joked.
"At 9AM? You know your a Hades kid, not a Dionysus kid right" Percy asked.
"Did you know you're supposed to be a half-blood, not a walking pain in my ass, right? I guess we're all multi-talented like that" You said. You and Annabeth started laughing as he gave you a side-eye, laughing just a little bit. That's when you and Annabeth walked off to go get some pancakes.
"You sure nothing happened last night" Annabeth asked as you both took a seat in front of each other.
"Extremely sure, why do you ask" you said.
"Well, I know you guys were insulting each other, but that felt.. different." Annabeth thought was truly on to something when she said that. Almost felt like swiping the tray straight from her.
"Literally nothing has changed" you said.
"Um no. You don't seem upset about having had a conversation with him." Oh she really thought she hit the nail on the head with that one.
"Okay Ms. Detective, let's enjoy our breakfast and meet up with Silena when we're done okay?" And with that you both kept eating. After you guys finished, you both got off and walked with your arms interlocked towards Selena's class. When you got there the bell rang revealing the gorgeous Silena.
"Hey guys" greeted Silena.
"Guess who Y/N got drunk with last night" Annabeth was jumping up and down waiting for Silena to answer. Not even a hello or good morning.
"What, who!!" Silena screeched.
"PERCY" Annabeth is so excited over nothing it's crazy.
"Finally they-" you cut Silena off.
"They nothing! Nothing happened! We got drunk and acted like we always do. Now, let's move on shall we" You said with a psycho looking grin on your face. The pair muttered an agreement and reluctantly moved on. As you guys walked around campus, just hanging out you got a text on your phone from.. Percy.
'hey styx girl, you busy?'
You giggled at the underworld nickname. This sadly caught your friends attention.
"Oh? Giggling at your phone?" Silena leaned over.
"Whose texting you hm" Annabeth was also now leaning over.
"Oh, um, Its nothing. Percys just asking if I'm busy right now." Great they're screaming now. Oh my gods.
"YOUR NOT BUSY" they yelled simultaneously.
"Honestly I might go just to get away from you crazy people" you said.
"Fine with us" said Annabeth.
"Oh" you said, "so you guys hate me is what your saying"
"So, so much. Now tell Percy you're not busy." You, reluctantly, listened to Silena.
'No I'm not busy what's up'
And he responded instantly? Lets calm down now.
'alright then, grab a bathing suit and meet at my dorm'
"So, um, I gotta go guys. I'll catch up with you later kay" The two girls quickly waved you off knowing exactly where you were going, and who you were finding.
As you ran off to your dorm to change, you continued to wonder what your friends were seeing between you and Percy. What kind of relationship consist of two people constantly poking fun at each other.
And finally you made it to your dorm. You quickly changed to the first bathing suit you found, a dark red two piece. You threw on some shorts and a black tube top, and headed out. Not before being stopped by Nico.
"Where are you going" Nico questioned.
"Out" you said.
"With who, Percy?" Nico interrogated.
You hit a quick 180 and looked at Nico. "Hm? What?"
"Yeah, Percy? The same guy you stuffed in your closet last night? And the same guy you threw out that very door thinking I wouldn't notice?" Oh wow, this might be the true detective here.
"I'm not even gonna ask how you put that all together, but yeah I'm gonna go see Percy" you admitted.
"So what, are you taking my advice now?" Nico smirked up at you.
"What? What ad-" you trailed off, then you remembered. The library. "What no! Gods no, can't we just hang out?"
"Whatever you want Y/N, love ya, bye" Nico waved you off.
"Yeah, yeah love you too Nico, bye" you waved and walked off the door.
That kid got a WHOLE lotta nerve. Whatever. You then made your way to the Poseidon dorms. When you finally got there, you walked up to Percy's room. And just as you were about to knock, the door swung open.
"Wow, were you waiting by the peephole? Obsessed much" you joked.
"No I just felt your strange presence infecting my home" Percy said.
"Remember you invited ME over" you said as you pointed his finger in his chest.
"Yeah okay" Percy grabbed your hand, swatting it away. His hand lingering for an extra few seconds. "Let's go, shall we!"
He lead you out his doorway. As you guys entered the Poseidon common area, you walked toward the back door. It had a walk way that stretched over to the beach.
"I forgot you got a whole beach to yourself" you said.
"Meaning, we have a whole beach to ourselves" Percy said as he looked at the ocean. "Sorry I didn't supply-" he turned to look at you, but you already through down your clothes and were halfway to the ocean. Percy took after your example and threw down his shirt as he ran after you. You both collapsed into the ocean. Laughing at all the salt water you got into your mouth.
"Wanna see something cool" Percy asked.
"How cool is it" you asked.
"Extremely" Percy gloated.
"I've caught you watching paint dry, so the bar is very low" you retorted.
"No but this is actually cool follow me." And with that Percy grabbed your wrist and pulled you close. "Hold on tight." You guys were close. So you said something smart.
"Have you ever heard of something called a breathe mint, preferably spearmint?" Wow.
"Every chance you get huh." Without letting you answer, Percy dove the both of you underwater and quickly sped forward 100 feet into somewhat deeper water, and sprung you both above the surface.
"Gods, that's how you swim" you said dazed.
"What, you don't do that" Percy said stupidly. Then he went quiet for a few seconds. 'whats happening.' And before you had the chance to speak up, these two sea horse looking things popped out the water. Wait, these are hippocampi. Holy shit, you'd never seen one before, and they were really cute. Your mouth was agape while Percy spoke to them.
"Told you they were cool" Percy said. You just shook your head. Nobody moved for a split second. "So you gonna hop on one, or are gonna stay close to me?"
"I can ride one?!" You turned to Percy wide-eyed. He shook his head. You quickly hopped off of Percy and hopped on the hippocampi while Percy did the same.
"Hold on tight" Percy said. You decided you'd, for once, just listen to Percy. And with that, the sea creatures sped off into the ocean. This might've been the coolest thing you've ever done. Sure summoning ghosts are cool but, this is really fun. You guys were riding around, laughing and racing each other till the sun went down.
"Yo Y/N, are you getting kinda hungry" Percy asked. As you opened your mouth to answer him, you stomach let out a loud rumble. You both laughed. "Let's go to the cafeteria and get some food." You happily agreed.
You guys got dressed and walked down to get some food together. You two were joking together and going back and forth with each other till you got to the cafeteria. You both then walked up and grabbed some pizza then sat together. Munching.
"You know what Percy" you started as you took a bite from your pizza "your actually not that bad."
"Wow, is that a compliment" Percy said, jokingly shocked.
"Take it however you want" you said.
"I'll take it as you declaring your love for me" Percy laughed and you just rolled your eyes.
"Haha, in your dreams" you said, taking another bite of your pizza. "But seriously, hippocampi are adorable. Sure Hades creatures are cool, but there not as fun to look at you know."
"Poseidon knows what it is" He's talking about himself by the way.
"Someones a little confident aren't they" you joked.
"Insulting me after I gave you the chance to meet one of the creatures you've always wanted to see since we were like 13 is actually crazy" Percy said. Wow, that's so long ago. Sometimes you forget how long you've known Percy.
"Wait, you actually remembered that, how sweet of you" you playfully pouted at him. He smiled and threw a napkin at you, making you laugh.
"Of course, you didn't shut up about it for like a month" he said.
"Yeah like five years ago, in our prime pranking age. I didn't think you listened to anything I ever said" you said.
"Just because I was putting Nair in your shampoo doesn't mean I was deaf" Percy said in a matter-a-fact tone.
"Yeah okay, fair enough. But hey, at least are pranking days are behind us, right?" you questioned.
"Right, they are." You both smiled. "Does this make us friends now or something?"
"Ugh, I mean if you want to be. No need to twist my arm about it" Percy dragged. This guy.
"You know I may just take it back, if I may" you gave him a side eye.
"You may not, but I love the enthusiasm" you both started laughing. After you guys finished your pizza, it was dark out and you remembered you still needed to finish the project you had due tomorrow. So, you both walked back to your dorm.
"Today was actually fun, thanks seaweed brain" you said approaching your door.
"No problem styx girl" Percy said. You both stood there in front of each other. No one was moving. Were you supposed to hug him, fist bump him, what is this silence. Then, the door opened, both of you whipping your heads toward it. And of course, the lovely Nico di Angelo was standing right there with his shit eating grin.
"Hey Y/N, you're back. Oh was Percy coming in too? Were you gonna have a sleep over or something" Nico rambled. This man needs to calm it down.
"Your sisters a nerd who needs to finish homework, so I'm getting banished to my dorm" Percy said, jokingly rolling his eyes.
"Let's remembered who ruined my homework to begin with" you pointed your finger in his face. "And banished is a strong word calm down."
"Okay you two break it up" Nico joked as he pulled you inside.
"Bye Percy"
"Bye Y/N"
And Nico shuts the door. Hand still on the doorknob as he turns to look at you. With his stupid grin never leaving his face. "Interesting, interesting."
"Whats so interesting" his grinning was contagious. You were now smiling too.
"You could at least admit that you think he's hot." Nico pleaded.
"I'm so tireddd" you playfully dragged making you both laugh as you two made your ways to your room.
"Why are you like this sometimes, you know I'm right." Damn Nico. You sat at your desk not even bothering to change before starting.
"Fine, whatever you're right. Are you proud of yourself, would you like a medal to go along with that" you taunted causing him to roll his eyes as he plopped down on your bed.
"I hope it shiny, now tell me what happened" Nico insisted.
"Percy introduced me to some hippocampi, and they might've been the coolest things I've ever seen, and we've taken trips to the underworld." You gloated.
"Interesting, he took you to see the creatures you didn't shut up about at camp" Nico asked.
"Yeah, he actually said that. How I never shut up about them for a month when we were 13" you remembered. "I didn't think he actually remembered that."
"Of course he did" Nico said.
"Whats that supposed to mean" you asked.
"Oh nothing, nothing. I'm gonna go take a shower" Nico got up and started walking out.
"Alright, don't slip" you chuckled to yourself.
"That happened" Nico whipped around, "ONCE." This caused you to cackled as he turned back out and shut the door on his way out. You turned back to your computer and started to get to work.
[10:47] PM
Finally, you were done with your homework and showered yourself from all that salt water.You thought about going to sleep but you just weren't tired. So you got a brilliant idea and texted a certain someone.
'Percy can I come over'
You put your phone down and waited. Two minuted went by before your phone went off.
'Miss me already?'
This made you roll your eyes. He sent another message
'come over'
You hopped out of bed ad threw on the first hoodie you found. You rushed out your room and as you headed out, you heard a special someone clear his throat behind you.
"Going out to see Percy again?" Nico said. You turned around to look at him.
"Wow Nico, we gotta stop meeting like this" you hoked, throwing your arms in the arm.
"Haha very funny, so you going to see Percy" Nico said.
"Yeah, um, I am. I don't even know why" you said.
"We all know why. Stay safe though" Nico said.
"Safe from what, your acting like a monsters gonna attack me" you said as you turned around to go toward the door.
"That's not what I meant, bye" Nico said.
"Bye Nico." you said as you shut the door behind you, now standing in the hallway. "Wait, then what did he mean.." you said to yourself. Then it hit you.
'I just got what u meant, ur weird'
You texted Nico and continued your way back to the Poseidon dorms. 'What were you doing.' Finally you got there and knocked on the door. After waiting a moment, the door opened revealing Percy. Maybe Nico was right, maybe that's why you're here. But that's no ones business but your own.
"Hey Y/N, good to see you again" Percy moved to the side letting you in.
"Hey Percy, did I wake you" you asked.
"Nope, couldn't sleep" he admitted.
"Darn, I was hoping I caused an inconvenience" you snapped your fingers. Percy laughed at your antics. You followed him to his room. You guys sat on his bed, just chatting away like it now wasn't almost midnight. You yawned, making Percy also yawn.
"Hey, I should start heading back" you said. You stared standing when Percy pulled you back down. You looked at him a little confused.
"Cmon, it's late. Just stay here and keep me company" Percy suggested. It sounded like a good suggestion you were tired, but you were thinking of what Nico would say if you went to Percy's dorm for the night and didn't come back. So you made a sound decision.
"Alright, if you insist" you said, falling back onto the pillow.
"Oh, I insist" Percy got up and turned off the light before laying down next to you. Both of you laid next to each facing each other, laying very close not saying anything. Both of you to tired to move, you just drifted off to sleep.
..............................................................................................................................Pt. 3?🫡
313 notes · View notes
ynbabe · 4 days
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LOGAN FIC REQ!! (i love your messages au smmm btw THEYRE SO GOOD AHH) ok anywayssss
can you pls do logan x super super famous!reader.(preferably an actress but i don't mind any) so both of them are dating but are trying to keep it a secret since they've only been dating for a short amount of time. one night they decide to go on a date but paparazzi was there and it was going VIRAL. reader regrets not double checking if there would be any paps. sooo then everyone starts investigating on logan as the internet does and since everyone doesn't watch f1, they only see logan crashing and blah blah blah so they see him as a "bad driver" and he starts getting A LOT of hate because people think reader deserves better. they also start comparing him to reader's "more better and famous ex". reader and logan take time off social media and people think they broke up until reader releases an instagram post defending him and yeah a lot of fluff and hurt/comfort.
idk if this made sense but pls feel free to change anything!! again i love your work sm 💕‼️
Hiiii, omg thank you so much! Love love LOVE the fic idea and without any further ado- here's the fic, it isn't exactly as the prompt but I hope you love it-
Keep my wife's name OUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH ୨୧ Logan Sargeant x famous! reader
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As a celebrity, you don’t often have the privilege of privacy. The cameras seemed to follow you everywhere, from outside your house to the restaurants you ate at and even to private celebrations with your friends and family.
Your last relationship had gone south exactly because of the paparazzi, making assumptions about the seriousness of your relationship and even spreading pregnancy and marriage rumours, scaring the man away.
You had wanted to take it slow, heart broken from your previous relationship but then you met Logan and for the first time in a long time you felt like you could breath, like you could do what you wanted without being judged.
You knew who he was and he knew who you were and that was perfect.
The both of you had spent a perfect week in your villa in Bali, it had been risky but no one caught on, surprisingly.
You thought your luck would continue and you threw causation to the wind, not asking your assistant to check for paparazzi at the sushi restaurant you were going to in Shanghai.
Unfortunately, you were caught just as you were leaving the restaurants waking up to a host of notifications, some good and some gut-wrenching.
Logan on the other hand tried not to throw up, his eyes wide, you could tell he was scared. Would his team drop him? No, no. Why would they? Right? Oh God.
"Logan, Logs, baby are you okay?" You called out, dropping to your knees and cradling his face in your palms.
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f1waglife
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f1waglife Y/n nation how are we feeling tonight? Logang? How are we? This was definitely not the couple we expected but is this the couple we deserve?
Username OH HELL NAW- WHY IS THIS FLORIDA MAN DATING QUEEN Y/N?????
Username Y/n come home the kids miss you
Username Omg mans is in love
Username Get someone to look at you the way Logan looks at Y/n
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You saw some of the comments and while some made you smile, some made you want to slap a bitch, unfortunately, a scandal would not help, so you called up your PR manager, and the post was gone within a minute.
Logan's race had gone sour, with him getting an unfair penalty and points on his licence. The already poor start to your day had turned even worse when you saw Logan tiredly storm into the room collapsing on the bed, burying his face in his pillow.
"What... the..... fuck?" He screamed into the pillow making you smile a little. The small habit he'd picked up from you, screaming into the pillows as a way to think, one that you had picked up from one of the characters you played a long time ago.
"Why do people even care about who's dating who? That's so stupid." He rolled his eyes.
"Don't we binge Keeping Up with the Kardashians every Monday?" You asked.
"That's not the same though-" He paused and switched his phone off, he already didn't have access to his own Instagram, having given access to his manager a long time ago, he now didn't even want to talk to his friends or colleagues many of whom just wanted an autograph from you along with an explanation how he could be with you.
He turned around, pulling the blanket on him, tired from the day.
You pulled up Twitter as a habit but were greeted with a terrible chain of tweets judging every aspect of your relationship and even worse criticizing Logan without even knowing anything about the sport.
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"What the fuck-" You cursed out loud, you knew your fanbase was slightly (an underestimation) larger than your boyfriends but how could they call themselves your fans, when you have been a fan of Logan's since his first season in f1? All your co-stars American or not knew your borderline obsession for the man, every race week you'd be posting Williams on your story, how could they still hate on him?
You looked next to you, where your boyfriend was sleeping a small scowl on his pretty face.
PR be damned, he didn't deserve this.
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y/nl/nofficial
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y/nl/nofficial To anyone who calls themselves my fans and talks shit about my lovely boyfriend, UNFOLLOW ME ASAP. Logan is the kindest, sweetest, most talented man I've had the pleasure to know and he deserves better than the bullshit he gets from some assholes who don't know anything about him. To quote my friend Will: KEEP MY WIFES NAME OUT YOUR DAMN MOUTHS-
username oop sis snapped
username you tell em girl
username LOVE a gf whos rabidly in love with her bf
username now why would y'all try and shame Mother's boyfriend when all she does is post about him for race weekends??
username fr shes been a logan fan before logan fans have been logan fans
Williams We stan a protective gf 😮‍💨
username admin you'll always be famous y/nl/nofficial Cant help it he looks really pretty in blue 🥰 username oh she in love love
username shall we start calling him Father?
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The way I was struggling to write this fic cause I had to write bad things about Pookie Bear Logie is insane. But- I hope yall like it, please do let me know in the comments or reblogs!!!
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bubblergoespop · 29 days
Text
My Top Aaron Quotes
men who are just constantly tired of everything>>>>>
“Well buckle up, wiz kid.”
“So yeah, I am gonna miss you. I’m really gonna miss you.”
“Sue me. Except don’t. My brain is already fried from the financials, I don’t need to throw legalese on top of that.”
“Fuck it. There’s nothing in here I can’t replace. I want you."
“Oliver”
“I didn’t say I wanted to spend the day with you, I asked if you wanted to spend the day with me. I asked first.”
"Ell"
“Hey, stop it. Because you know how much I like you running your fingers through my hair. Makes my brain go all fuzzy.”
“I appreciate it. And you.”
“Oh, it’s not playing dirty. It’s just me making you feel good.”
“I didn’t realise I was apparently dating an anthropomorphic backpack.”
“H-hey—stop it. You—no, your kisses are just… it tickled. Shut up. So what if my sides are ticklish, it’s not like that’s weird, you shit.”
“Oh, and now you can’t even find the strength to lift your head out of my lap, hmm? You poor thing. Who knew that being lazy could be so exhausting?”
“I love you very much. Now get off me.”
“You talked a big talk back then. But it turns out you’re just a cuddle-hungry softy after all, huh? Yes you are. At least when you’re still sleepy, anyway.”
“I also know you’re probably the kind to fly off half-cocked and make me chase you down with the SPF 50 like a madman. If for no other reason than to infuriate me.”
“Come here. Come closer. Because I said so.”
“I love you. And I love rain. And I love being with the person I love while it rains. Isn’t that a fun little combo?”
“You are very cute looking up at me like that.”
“Or is the thought of a few more minutes in my arms that much of an imposition? Asshole. Mmm. I love you too.”
“I can’t even try to say a nice thing without you having to get some snark into it, can I? No, I wouldn’t have it any other way. You brat. I love you just as you are.”
“You make me better. And that’s no small order when you’re talking about me, given the high level I already started at.”
“A man’s gotta eat. And you’ve always been my favorite thing on the menu.”
“Oh yes, you’re so put upon. Your evil boyfriend only makes you a whole breakfast spread, he won’t then also let you sleep in even later than you already have.”
“Eli”
“Yes, in a shocking twist, I do find your absence unpleasant. Perish the thought, right?”
“Time spent with the people I care about is important to me. It doesn’t have to be time doing anything special, it doesn’t have to be conversations about our future or some greater purpose or any of that shit, I just want to be with the person that I’m with.”
“Sure, there are plenty of ways to sleep on a couch just fine. It’s your hybrid approach that lands somewhere between gymnast and pretzel that tends to get you in trouble.”
“You’re okay. It’s gonna be okay.”
“If it feels like it's coming on again, come tell us, okay?”
“I only met them a handful of times. They're sweet. They laugh a lot. They spent most of the time giving Elliott shit, it was funny. Not in like a mean way, like the way you do when you love somebody that much. They were a good balance for one another.”
“God I sound old. And I feel old. And I’m not, but it feels like it. A grumpy old man. Might as well start yelling at kids to not play so loud in the neighborhood, really complete the image.”
“Stop calling me an old man, only I’m allowed to call me old. Don’t be mean. I’m in a vulnerable state. I need baseless praise.”
“Yes. Holding you feels very productive.”
“Yeah. Let me just rub it on that pretty face for a little bit…”
“ It’d be fine. Almost as fine as you. I’m tired, I’m allowed to be stupid.”
“El, I have never hated you. You’re my little brother, I love you.”
“No the windows are mirrored glass. You should know that, you worked here.”
“Whose is it? Louder”
“Thank you baby. Yeah, thank you for trusting me like you do. […] All I wanna do is prove myself worthy of that trust.”
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eleventhdoctorsangel · 8 months
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Never wanted you to hate me
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I’ve spent most of my life with the pirate hunter known as Roronoa Zoro. I owe him with my life. He saved me. Ever since then I’ve been helping him. I often will get used as bait to help with the latest bounty Zoro is hunting. But never am I ever at risk of any harm. Zoro always makes sure of that. There been a few times where he actually came close to killing a few guys that he wasn’t hunting because they either touched me or hurt me.
Now we got roped into helping this kid who is very determined on becoming king of the pirates and finding the one piece. Both Zoro and I were trying to rest while Nami was still working on getting the safe open. Unlike Luffy we are giving her space and quiet to work. We have a bet going to see how long it is before she throws him overboard. Finally I heard the sound of it clicking open. I could hear Zoro getting up. “Let me know if there is anything interesting enough for me to get up will you please.” I said. “Or I can drag you.” Zoro said. “Yeah you and I both know that you won’t.” I said. “Whatever.” Zoro said as he squeezed my hips making me laugh a little. “Hate you.” I said. “No you don’t.” Zoro said. “The night is not over yet.” I said.
I could hear Nami let out a frustration sigh. What did Luffy do now. I sat up to the three of them walking in. “The seas are divided into four quadrants. East blue, North blue, West, South. This strip of land that circles the globe is called the red line and this band across is the grand line. A treacherous stretch of ocean with bigger islands, bigger cities, bigger pirates. Flush with riches and ripe for the picking.” Nami said. “And that’s where we’re going to find the one piece.” Luffy said. “I’ve taken out a lot of pirates looking for that thing. What is it? Like a big diamond or something?” Zoro said. “It’s Gold Roger’s treasure. He hid it somewhere in the grand line. All in one piece.” Luffy said. “If you believe the story. I could say the same thing without proof you’re just going off a story.” I said. “See she gets it. It’s a myth. The reason no one’s found it in 22 years is that it doesn’t exist.” Nami said. “Can’t wait to see the look on the two of yours faces when we find it.” Luffy said. “Alright if we find it I’ll eat your hat.” I said. The look on Luffy’s face was priceless. “Kidding. I know that hat means a lot to you.” I said as an explosion went off causing me to jump a little. “Is that the marines?” Zoro asked. “How did they find us?” Nami asked. We all walked out to see a red cloud above us. “This smoke smells weird.” Luffy said. As I started to breathe in the smoke I started to get lightheaded. I leaned against the side of the ship. I fell to my knees then it all went black.
No one’s POV
The smoke was clean as the pirate clown buggy and the crew of freaks climbed onto the small ship. Three of the four people were outside while the fourth was inside. Two males and two females. Buggy walked over to one of the girls. She was laying on her side some of her hair was covering her face. Buggy bent down and gently brushed the hair from her face. “You want us to put her with the others?” One of the crew members asked. “No I have a special role for her. No one is allowed to harm her if any of you so as much pluck a hair from her head even if it’s by accident you’re dead.” Buggy said as he picked up the girl from the ground and started to carry her off the ship. He carried her onto his ship taking her to his living quarters and gently laid her down on his bed.
Buggy went to grab a special outfit that he had been saving. He went to get a female crew member to get her changed. He could be a monster but he’s not that much of a monster. But he did stand outside of the room to make sure that none of the other male crew members tried to look. It was only a few minutes later that the female crew member left. He walked back into his room and over to the girl. “I have to admit that this outfit looks cuter on you than I thought it would have.” Buggy said tracing a hand down the side of her face.
End of No One’s POV
I could feel someone poking me. “Come on now wakey wakey.” The voice said. “Luffy stop poking me.” I said swatting the hand away. “Sorry but I’m not Luffy. Now come on and open your eyes I would like to see what color eyes you have.” The voice said. I groan as I moved my head away. “Come on now I don’t want to have to get mad but I will if you don’t open your eyes.” The voice said. I opened my eyes to see a clown holding me close to him I let out a gasp as I tried to get away but he held on to my upper arms in a very tight grip. “Now don’t you have some beautiful eyes.” He said grabbing me by the chin. I looked around for the others but I couldn’t see them. “Looking for your friends. Don’t worry you’re see them in a few minutes. I just decided that you should have a special role in todays show.” He said. “If you hurt me my friend will kill you.” I said. Which only made him laugh. “Kill me. Your friend can try but they will be the one who ends up dead.” He said. At the same time I started to hear circus music. “Come on now the fans await.” He said as he started to pull me with him.
That when I glanced down and saw that I wasn’t wearing my normal clothes but now a revealing circus outfit. With this guy and how handys he’s being if Zoro gets one look at him Zoro will kill this guy if they didn’t take Zoro swords from him. I could hear the crowd yelling but it sounded off. Like they were being forced to. “Great they messed this up again. I wanted you’re first introduction to go perfect.” He said. I just forced a smile as he pulled me along with him. “No. No, no, no, no. Stop clapping! No.” He said as we started to walk in the ring. I was focusing on trying not to trip with how much my legs were shaking. “It’s all wrong.” He said stepping in the ring using one arm to pick me up by the waist. I look around to see if I could see the others and thankfully I finally could. Just like I guessed I could see the rage in Zoros eyes. Both Nami and Luffy had to put their arms out to keep Zoro from storming over. I shook my head slightly at him to let him know that now wasn’t the best time to attack. “The spotlight was late. You completely missed our entrance.” He said as he motioned for the spotlight to be put on us. It was very quickly put on us. “And where oh where was the dancing lion?” He asked as we walked over to a guy in a lion costume. Which made the guy look away in fear. “Hey I know you. I saw your wanted poster in Shells Town. You’re the clown guy. Um uh binky right?” Luff said. “Buggy. Buggy the clown. Buggy the flashy fool. Buggy the genius jester.” Buggy said as pulled me along closer to the others. “Wow. You have a lot of names. I bet everyone in the east blue knows who you are.” Luffy said. I heard everyone gasp and the hold he had on me was let go. “What did you just say?” Buggy asked. “Just that everyone knows who you are.” Luffy said again.
Buggy rushed over to Luffy grabbing him by the face. “Nose! Are you making fun of my nose?” Buggy asked. “Well I wasn’t. But now that you mention it is that thing for real?” Luffy said as he raised a hand to touch Buggy’s nose. Which Buggy was quick to slap away. “What’s real is I’ve been scheming for months to steal that map from old axe hand moron.” Buggy said pushing Luffy away. He looked to Nami to see if she caught his joke. “Only to find out that I was upstaged by four little nobodies who stole it from right under my no. No! It’s in my head now.” Buggy said letting out a groan. I put my hand to my mouth trying not to laugh. “Hey! I’m not a nobody. I’m Monkey D Luffy. And I will be king of the pirates.” Luffy said. Which made Buggy start to laugh. “Oh! Now that’s funny.” Buggy said. Which made the crowd nervous laugh again but Buggy motioned them to stop. “My bounty poster graces the marquee of every marine outpost for miles. And my menagerie of outcasts and freaks is the most dreaded pirate crew the east blue has ever known.. Expect her. I hope you don’t mind if I take her off your hands because I would like to keep her. I am destined to find the one piece. And when I do. I will be king and she will be my queen.” Buggy said as he looked at me. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes as I looked over to the others. “No you wont cause I’m gonna find it first.” Luffy said. “You? Don’t make me laugh.” Buggy said. The crowd started to laugh. “I said don’t make me laugh!” Buggy said as he turned to look at them. “Alright listen up. I’m Roronoa Zoro. Drop your weapons now, give me the girl back and I may let you live.” Zoro said as he walked closer to Buggy. Which then made Buggy grab me pulling me into him laughing. “Ladies and gentlemen we have a celebrity in our midst. Too bad I hate sharing the spotlight.” Buggy said putting his chin on my shoulder. As again the spotlight was put back on the two of us. “Now maybe we should skip right to the finale.” Buggy said pulling out four knives holding them close to my face. I tried to get away but that only worsen his grip. “My freaks put quite a bit of rehearsal time into this little abduction. And if I can’t reward them with that map I supposed I’ll have to offer them a pound of flesh instead.” Buggy said. I started to think about what he just said. I knew that the pound of flesh wouldn’t come from me since he seems dead set on keeping me.
That’s when Nami stepped up. “Wait. Wait. What if I have something else to offer you? Something more valuable than the map? What if I give you a new freak for your crew? A rare talent. The most spectacular act in all the East Blue. Beside you of course.” Nami said. “Go on.” Buggy said. Nami quickly yanked off Luffy hat throwing high in the air. Which made Luffy stretch his arm to grab it. But as Buggy was distracted his grip on me was loosened. I took that as my chance to try to get away. I tried to run to Zoro but Buggy caught my wrist pulling me back to him. “Try that again sweetheart and I’m afraid I might have to hurt.” Buggy said. “You touch her and I will kill you where you stand.” Zoro said. Buggy looked at him and laughed as he dragged me away.
“Now if I let you go do you promise to behave.” Buggy said. “Yes I promise.” I said. “Good girl.” Buggy said pinching my cheek. Buggy pulled an orange from his pocket and started peeling it with one of the knives and started to eat it. Two members of his crew dragged Nami back as she tried to escape by revealing Luffy’s powers. “What did you do to their town? You destroyed everything!” Nami said. “Not everything. I let ‘em keep their hands.” Buggy said. As the crowd clapped. “Okay. Here end the theatrics. I know one of you three has my map and I’m gonna get it back. What was it you said rubber boy? That it was in a safe place? Don’t look so surprised. I’ve got eyes and ears everywhere. So please make our guest uncomfortable in the green room.” Buggy said. I watched as Zoro and Nami were dragged away but Luffy wasn’t. “I am gonna have a chat with my stretchy new pal.” Buggy said laughing. Luffy looked over to me. “Don’t look at her. She’s not part of your crew anymore now is she.” Buggy said. “I just want to know if she is okay.” Luffy said. “She’s fine aren’t you sweetheart.” Buggy said. “I want to hear it from her.” Luffy said. I was honestly scared to answer what if Buggy hurts me if I do. I looked over to Buggy who smiled. “Well aren’t you a good girl. Looking to you’re future king for approver to answer. Go ahead.” Buggy said. “I’m okay Luffy they or Buggy haven’t hurt me.” I said. “See I told you she was fine. Now where were we.” Buggy said.
I watched as they put Luffy on a rack and made a poor town person stretch Luffy out. The more Luffy was stretched out he began to scream laugh. I wonder how far he could actually stretch guess I might find out. “I want you to think of this like an artistic exercise because pain leads to art. And art reveals truth. But there’s only one truth I need from this exercise. Where is my map.” Buggy asked as he walked over to Luffy. “Truthfully? I’m.. I’m kind of hungry. Don’t circuses have cotton candy?” Luffy asked. I let out a sigh. Not the time Luffy. Buggy laughed then let out a groan. “What could you possibly need that map for anyways? You won’t last five minutes in the grand line.” Buggy said. “I already told you. I’m gonna be king of the pir.” Luffy said. “Boring! Let’s go another ten feet.” Buggy said. The town person did as he was told. “You can stretch me all you want. I can do this all day.” Luffy said. “I’m not asking the right questions. We need to go deeper get you out of your comfort zone. What makes a boy want to grow up to be King of the pirates? Who are you trying to impress? A lost love? An absent parent? Or was it someone that you worshiped? A false idol. That’s it.” Buggy said and yanked off Luffy hat. “Hey give me back my hat!” Luffy yelled. Buggy walked over and placed Luffy hat on my head. I could see Luffy relax a little since I was now wearing his hat. “I used to know a pirate that wore a hat just like this. Red haired Shanks.” Buggy said. “You knew Shank’s?” Luffy asked. “Ginger? Three scars left eye?” Buggy asked motioning to his left eye. So they both knew the same guy. “We served together on a pirate crew when we were about your age. For a time I even thought we were friends. Until he betrayed me. Just like all the others. He wanted to keep ME out of the spotlight! He wanted to keep my star from shining too brightly! Is that what he did to you rubber boy? Did shanks betray you too?” Buggy said. “Don’t talk about him that way.” Luffy said. “Ah. Now we are finally getting to the truth. Stretch him until he breaks.” Buggy said. “Please don’t make me do this.” The town person begged. “I invite you to take part in the splendor that is my show and this is how you repay me? With a no?” Buggy said. “You’ve destroyed our town. Made us your prisoners. Isn’t that enough?” The town person said. “Well maybe you’d prefer it If I threw one of your constituents on the rank instead.” Buggy said as he walked to the crowd. No no no. Quick think of something. “Wait!” I yelled. Which made Buggy stopped. “Yes.” Buggy said as he looked at me. “Pirates like to claim their treasure right?” I said. “Go on.” Buggy said putting a hand under his chin. “You said yourself that I belong to you now therefor I’m technically your treasure right. Don’t you have to claim me so no one else can take me away from you.” I said. “I like were this is going.” Buggy said. “Then do it right now. Carve your initial on me. If I don’t make a sound then you have to promise that you won’t have any of these towns people. But if I do.” I said but couldn’t finished the last sentence. Buggy seemed to think about it for a minute. “Alright fine I agree to your terms now come here.” Buggy said motioning for me to come to him. “Y/n don’t.” Luffy said. “Shut up!” Buggy said. “It’s okay Luffy.” I said as I walked over to Buggy.
When I got over to Buggy he pulled out a knife and started lightly tracing it around my body. “Where oh where should I leave my initial. Oh I know.” Buggy has he moved the knife to my upper right breast. But before he started he kiss me right there. “Now remember sweetheart not a sound because if you don’t someone is about to get tall fast.” Buggy said. “Just do it.” I said. As Buggy carved his initial on me I bit my lip to stop me from crying out in pain. If we get out of this Zoro will definitely make his death a slow and painful one. It only took a couple of minutes before Buggy was done. “Well well sweetheart you managed to do it. But how about next I claim you in a different way.” Buggy said he put a cloth on the wound to prevent blood from getting on the outfit then putting an arm around my waist pulling me into him. “Boogie I’m warning you.” Luffy said. “It’s Buggy! And you’re warning me? Now that’s a laugh. I said that’s a laugh.” Buggy said. As the crowd forced a laugh. Then Luffy managed to free himself. As Luffy got up he glared at Buggy. “Put her down.” Luffy said. “But why? She’s having such great time. Aren’t you sweetheart?” Buggy said grabbing my face. But what he did next shocked and scared me. He kissed me on the lips. It only lasted a few seconds before he pulled away. “Yes. The best Buggy. I never want to leave you Buggy.” Buggy said trying to inmate my voice. The Luffy stretched back his arm. “Gum Gum pistol!” Luffy yelled and punched off Buggy’s head. I let out a terrified scream as I could see that there was no blood and worst of all Buggy’s body was still moving. Buggy’s head landed on a woman’s lap in the crowd which caused more screaming. “Hi. Well well well looks like we have something else in common.” Buggy said as his head returned back to his body. “You ate a devils fruit?” Luffy asked. “The chop chop fruit. So you can slice me and you dice me but I’ll always put myself back together again.” Buggy said as he stripped himself of the coat he wearing. He gently put it around my shoulders. Then I watched as he chopped himself into six different pieces then went back to normal. “Want to see what else I can do?” Buggy asked as he made a motion to his hand. His hand was gone but it tapped Luffy on the shoulder squeezing another bomb like thing that the same kind of smoke from earlier came out. His detached hand punched Luffy in the face and flipped him off. “Luffy.” I said as I tried to rush to his side but Buggy stopped me. “I don’t think so sweetheart. My crew will take care of him.” Buggy said. “What are you going to do to him?” I asked. “I’m going to put him in my tank of doom.” Buggy said.
*Meanwhile with Zoro and Nami*
“So are you and her together?” Nami asked as she was working on picking the lock on the cage she was being kept in. “No we’re not. We’re not together like that.” Zoro said. “Then what’s the deal between you two. I mean I saw the way you acted when we saw that clown had his hands on her. You were ready to kill him on sight. You might say you don’t care about her but your actions when she’s in danger say a different story.” Nami said. “I never said I don’t care about her. Don’t ever say I don’t care about her again. Just because I don’t care about her in that way doesn’t mean I will never care about her.” Zoro said. “Alright fine geez. Then what’s the story between you two?” Nami said. “She reminds me of a friend I used to know. I couldn’t save or protect my friend back then but I can do that for her.” Zoro said. “That surprisely sweet coming from you.” Nami said. “Shut up.” Zoro said. Right then the two of them heard a terrified scream coming from Y/n. Which made Zoro immediately went back to trying to break the ropes. “Hurry the hell up now.” Zoro said. “Yeah.” Nami said as she started to work quicker and picking the lock.
*Back to Y/n*
I watched as Luffy was put in a tank as water slowly filled the tank then I saw seaweed. “Is this seawater?” I asked. “Why yes it is sweetheart. You see if you eat a devil’s fruit you might gain a power like yours truly and rubber boy here but just a few splashes of seawater will take that all of that away.” Buggy said. “Oh.” I said. Come on Luffy wake back up please. I don’t want to deal with him by myself. Yes the towns people are still watching but what if he tries something their too afraid of him to stop him and I don’t know where Zoro and Nami were taken to or if anything happened to them. But I could feel him looking at me. “What?” I asked as I looked to the ground. “You’re scared of me aren’t you sweetheart.” Buggy said. “I’m not scared of you.” I said. “Then how come you won’t look at me.” Buggy said. “You kidnapped me and my friends, you destroyed these people’s town and you’re now holding them against their will. You hurt Luffy. I don’t know what you’re doing to Zoro and Nami they could be dead for all I know.” I said. “Well their not dead.” Buggy said. “How can I believe you. I haven’t got any proof that you would tell me the truth.” I said. “But you did forget to mention that.” Buggy said motioning to where the cloth was. “I did that because I didn’t want you to hurt anyone.” I said. Then I could see Luffy start to wake up. “Looks like Luffy is waking up.” I said. Buggy kissed the side of my head but I couldn’t help but smile just a little. “Do my eyes deceive me or did I see a little smile.” Buggy said. “Just go.” I said but Buggy took Luffy hat off my head taking it with him. I watched as Luffy tried to break the glass but failed. “Don’t bother. It’s seawater. Hardly seems fair. All those wonderful powers rendered useless from a few splashes. Of course you could always give me my map. If you don’t want to die alone in this tank.” Buggy said walking over to the tank and kneeled in front of it. “My crew.” Luffy said. “Your crew? You means the ones that abandoned you? Just like Shanks did. I did that make you sad?” Buggy said. “They will come back for us.” Luffy said as he looked at me. “No one’s coming for you. I already made myself clear about her. She stays with me. Your only chance is to turn over that map and if you do I may have a very special place on my crew just for you. Think about how happy she’ll be to at least have someone she already knows and she won’t have to be around all new people. Ain’t that right sweetheart.” Buggy said tossing Luffy’s hat to the side. I watched as Luffy struggled to get up as Buggy copied his movement. “Never.” Luffy said. “Why not!” Buggy yelled and hit the tank then grabbed his hand in pain. I couldn’t help but laugh.
Which made Buggy glare at me. I just smirked and flipped him off. “You’re an outcast just like the rest of us. A freak, scorned and abandoned! Join me and you can serve the man who will become the king of the pirates. When I have that map I will find the one piece and then everyone will know my name. And they’ll love me.” Buggy said but he at end he looked at me. “You can’t make people or her love you. Just like you can’t make them smile. I’ll never give you that map.” Luffy said. “Well then I guess it’s curtains for you.” Buggy said walking back over to the tank. “No wait Buggy please don’t.” I said standing in front of him. “I’m getting sick of you interfering in my show.” Buggy said as he roughly pushed me away. I landed on my side roughly making me cry out in pain. I looked and saw more water pouring into the tank at a faster rate.
Buggy walked away from the tank and went to pick up Luffy hat pulling a piece of straw from it. “Don’t touch my hat!” Luffy yelled. “What was that? I. I couldn’t hear you over all the drowning.” Buggy said. I slowly got up as I did my side started to hurt. I now saw that Luffy was under the water now. “You want out? You know the price you have to pay.” Buggy said. Luffy smiled and tapped on the glass. I turned around and saw Nami as she threw her staff towards the tank making it crack. If she was okay then Zoro is too then we can leave and I will never have to see Buggy again. The tank started to break more as Buggy looked around. “Where are my freaks!” Buggy said. Then I saw Zoro. “They’re not coming.” Zoro said. “Zoro.” I said as I ran towards him but I felt a hand grab me pulling me back. This fucking clown. “Did I say you can leave me.” Buggy said roughly yanking me around. “I don’t fucking care. I don’t want to spend a single fucking second longer near you.” I said fighting his grip. I heard the glass break and went the amount of water that came from the tank it knocked both of us off our feet. But it was seawater so it should have the same effect on Buggy.
Buggy’s grip on me loosened enough for me to get away from him. I look to see Luffy coughing up the map. I had to grabbed it before Buggy. I got up and rushed over grabbing it. But I was yanked to the ground and Buggy climbed on top of me. “Thanks sweetheart. Because you got me my map I can forgive that little outburst of yours.” Buggy said as he took the map from me. “Screw you.” I said. “Well since your friend is back to watch that sounds like a great idea.” Buggy said pulling me up from the ground. Buggy looked between me and the map laughing and then buried his face in my neck. Both Nami and Zoro walked towards us. “You want a piece of me? Let’s see what you got. You better move sweetheart I would hate for you to get hurt.” Buggy said as he let me go. I rushed over to Luffy. “Are you okay?” I asked as I helped him up. “I’ll be fine. What about you?” Luffy asked. “I just want to leave and never have to see this clown again.” I said. “No.” Luffy said quietly. I looked to see Nami and Zoro being knocked to the side as Buggy put himself back together looking towards the two of us as Luffy pushed me behind him. “Ah. Would you look at that? Somebody escaped my tank of doom. Well I’ll be back to finish you off. Right after I tear apart your sad excuse for a crew.” Buggy said laughing. “You can dump seawater on me and I’ll let it slide. But don’t you ever threaten or hurt my friends” Luffy said as he punched Buggy in the stomach causing a piece to fly off then return making Buggy wink at us. “I’ll find the map can you handle him.” I whispered to Luffy. “Go.” Luffy whispered back. I slowly made my way out from behind him as Buggy pulled out knives. “So you want die first? Be my guest.” Buggy said as he pulled himself apart. I got down until I was out of danger. “Chop chop cannon!” Buggy yelled as the pieces started to fly towards Luffy. I started to quickly look around for the map. “Hey.” A voice said quietly. I looked to see a boy point just off to the side at the map. “Thanks kid.” I said rushing over to grab it. “Nami! The crates!” Luffy yelled. I ran to the other side of the ring helping trap pieces of Buggy in crates. I smiled when I saw Zoro stab pieces of Buggy.
With help from Nami all that was left of Buggy was his feet, hands and his head. “What have you done to me?” Buggy asked. “Cut you down to size.” Luffy said. Honestly Buggy really looked funny. “The one piece will never be yours. You’re just a sad lonely little boy wearing another man’s hat!” Buggy said. “I know exactly who I am. I’m Monkey D. Luffy. And I’m going to be king of the pirates.” Luffy said stretching both arms back. I couldn’t help but smile. “Gum Gum.” Luffy yelled. “Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa! No no no! Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait” Buggy yelled. “Bazooka!” Luffy yelled launching the rest of Buggy out of the big top.
I breathed a sigh of relief as I ran over and hugged Luffy. Luffy hugged me back. “Found the map.” I said as I handed it to him as Nami and Zoro walked over to us. I pretty much launched myself into Zoro arms as he held me close to him. “Are you okay?” Zoro said into my ear. “I will be.” I said. “Let’s get out of this clown show.” Zoro said as he let me go and started to walk me out. But stopped when Luffy put a hand on his shoulder. “Still one more thing we have to do.” Luffy said as we looked to the towns people. We start to get the people unchained. After I unchained the boy that pointed out the map he hugged me. I smiled and hugged him back.
As a thank you from preventing Buggy from harming them they managed to find me a changed of clothes so I didn’t have to wear the outfit that Buggy had me wear. They also tried to give us a little food but Luffy refused to take it. I was the first one to go back to the ship as started getting things ready to leave. I waved back to the towns people as we sailed away. I knew I should talk with Zoro about what happened to me but I wasn’t sure if I was ready yet. I sat near the front of the ship as I watched Nami fix Luffy hat. “Almost finished.” Nami said. Then she hands him his hat back. “You fixed it. Thanks.” Luffy said with a smile. “Well you said it was your treasure right?” Nami said then walked away. “Is every day gonna be this crazy with you?” Zoro asked. “Shanks always said that if the path to what you want seems too easy then you’re on the wrong path.” Luffy said. “I really like that.” I said. “This shanks guy sounds all right.” Zoro said. Luffy came over to stand on the railing of the front of the ship. “Next stop the grand line.” Luffy said as he pointed out to the open sea. I smiled as I shook my head. Zoro motioned me to come over to him. “Wish me luck Luffy.” I said as I got up. “He’s not mad with you if that’s what you’re thinking he was just really worried about you.” Luffy said. I smiled then walked over to Zoro sitting next to him.
“What to tell me how you got that.” Zoro said. “You saw that?” I asked. Zoro nodded. “He wanted to hurt one of the towns people I wasn’t going to let him do that. They were innocent Zoro. I know that you might have been okay with something like that but I’m not like you. I rather it be me that got hurt before one of them.” I said. “It was still a very stupid thing for you to do.” Zoro said. “He kissed me too.” I said. “I’m definitely killing that fucking clown next time I see him.” Zoro said. I laughed and put my head on his shoulder. “Did you he do anything else to you. I heard you scream.” Zoro said. “Oh that was when we saw that he has similar powers to Luffy. He punched off his head while he still had a grip on me but I didn’t get hurt.” I said. “Not going to lie it was creepy seeing it for the first time. Anything else?” Zoro said. I bit my lip as tears filled my eyes. “What is it? You know that what ever it is that I will never be upset or angry at you.” Zoro said. “I know. After he craved his initial on me he said wanted to claim me in that way.” I said as could feel him tense up. Then he went quiet. “Please don’t go quiet on me. You know I hate when you do that.” I said as I picked my head up to look at him. “I promise to you that next time we see that clown I will kill him.” Zoro said. I threw my arms around his shoulders as I buried my face in next as I started to cry. “It’s okay I got you. You’re safe.” Zoro said as he held me close to him holding me as I cried.
For the rest of the day Zoro didn’t want me to leave his sight even though we on the ship and couldn’t really go anywhere. “You should try to get some rest.” Zoro said. “I’m okay right now.” I said. “I wasn’t asking.” Zoro said. “Alright fine I’m going.” I said as I got up going inside laying down. I closed my eyes and tried to get some sleep. I tossed and turned for what seems like forever before I finally managed to fall asleep.
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seungmoonandstars · 5 months
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𝐿𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝒟𝒶𝓉𝑒
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Kim Seungmin/Female Reader
wc: 11k
rating: mature/explicit ಇ
comments: thanks everyone for the likes and reblogs and feedback! (´︶`) knowing someone is enjoying my fics makes writing seungmin so much easier. technically this is the last part, but not really...
⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。 ⋆ ⋆。 ゚。 ⋆
→ Blind Date
→ Second Date
→ Third Date
Part 4 of 4
Seungmin goes quiet after that, relaxes against the arm of the couch. You’re on the opposite side, doing the same. You watch each other carefully , but nobody makes a move, and nobody starts to speak.
You wonder if there was something you could have done to avoid all of this drama. Four and a half months of wondering; of being so down you can barely make it to work some days. Both of you have been really bad at this.
“Yes, I know it’s complicated.”
-
Counting the days and weeks until Seungmin comes back to you has been excruciating, sometimes anxiety inducing, and the only thing really keeping you together.
As of today it’s been 136 days since you spent the night with him. Twenty weeks, almost, since you looked at him face to face—touched him, kissed him, desperately wanted to confess how you’ve already fallen for him, and you never want to leave his side again.
But he did text you three days ago.
A part of you feels like giving up, because maybe this has gone on for far too long.
It’s nothing that Seungmin has done. He hasn’t said anything to you about things likely not working out. He talks to you in the same sweet, cheery way he always has when he actually has time to text, or call. You don’t resent him for his lack of communication, ever, because you know his lifestyle is worlds away from yours.
But the part of you that’s crazy about him sits and thinks: he can call for a five minute conversation, ask me how I am before I completely fall apart. You think…why hasn’t he messaged back? It takes a few seconds.
You hate having these thoughts. But you’re only human, and you have so much empty time to think about him.
It’s just not the same for him. It might never be the same for him.
Right now you’re staring out of your classroom window, completely lost in thought. The kids are working quietly, and it’s honestly the first time all day where you’ve been truly alone in your head.
There’s a loud knock on the door, and it makes you, and your students, jump.
“Come in…”
The door opens slowly, and the face that peeks through the door is a familiar one.
“Hey,” Choonhee waits a moment, then enters and closes the door behind her. She grabs a chair and finds a spot to sit directly in front of, across your desk.
“Hi, what’s up?”
“I’m on my way out, but I wanted to see you before I left. I keep missing you, and you’re not answering my messages.” The look she gives you is a little bit questioning, and a little bit irritated.
“Sorry, I’ve just had a lot on my mind. I’m trying to get out of this slump.”
“Slump? The same one you’ve been in for the last…” she gestures vaguely at nothing, “month? Maybe longer, I don’t know.”
“Yeah,” you manage, but it comes out shaky. You feel your throat tighten, and the air is pushed out of your lungs. Your eyes sting with tears. You can’t do this here.
“Hey hey, I’m sorry.” Choonhee starts to stand, “go pull yourself together, I’ll watch the class.”
You inhale deeply and make your way to the restroom. Luckily you have it to yourself, because when you catch sight of yourself in the mirror, tears are starting to stream down your cheeks. The result of bottling up until you explode.
Talking to Choonhee about this was always an option, but you haven’t. For some reason, you didn’t want her know how deep the cut is that Seungmin has made in you.
Her blind date was probably never supposed to turn into this; something serious, something you want, maybe more than anything you’ve ever wanted. You feel stupid and childish about it, because you know who he is. Sometimes you have to remind yourself that it was him that initiated date number two, and three, sort of, otherwise you’ll convince yourself you somehow forced him into all of this.
It takes far too long for you to finish crying and clean yourself up, but she’s still sitting there waiting when you return.
“I’ll be over tonight, and we’re going to talk it out. Okay?” She says.
You nod, eyes still red, makeup probably giving you two black eyes.
“I have to get going, I’ll see you later. Your phone went off while you were in the bathroom.”
You watch her as she walks out, then look to your students. In a few minutes, they’ll be dismissed. And you can go home and finish the crying that you’ve started.
First, you sit and poke the screen of your phone. It’s just a text message.
No, it’s not just a text message. It’s Seungmin. Choonhee probably looked, but all she would’ve seen is the contact name for him; SM.
Weeks ago, you almost changed it to Minnie, but you didn’t. The impersonal, secretive SM remained. You unlock your phone and open it.
I hope you had a good day. You’re just leaving work, I think…if I have my time right
And just like that, he pulls you back up, and back in. He says the right thing at just the right time. Although today, he he did miss it by a few minutes.
Now you battle with whether or not you text him back immediately, or wait until you get home. Neither feels like the right thing to do. You stare down at the message until it’s time for you to dismiss your class, thinking of what to say to him.
It’s personal. He took note of the time, and remembered when it is you usually leave.
Part of you feels like crying again, but your heart is fluttering. You hate this.
———
“I got your favorite!” Choonhee starts unloading the bag of food she brought with her. “Don’t look so defeated over there.”
She let herself in while you sat folded up on the couch. You’re still looking at your phone, trying to figure out what to say to him. Should you keep it casual and tell him your day was alright? Lie?
No, you could tell him the truth; that it was a rough day, and you’ve had a lot of days like this lately because you haven’t seen him in such a long time. But you have no idea how he’d react to that. Maybe he would feel guilty about not texting more, or feel bad because he’s been too busy to see you when he is in Seoul.
Or maybe he would feel overwhelmed by it, and decide enough was enough.
Seungmin—the Seungmin you know, at least, has always come off very laidback. Open when he needed to be, but not overly so. He’s a little bit reserved, but so many moments with him have been…cute.
And Chicago. It’s been so long since Chicago—long enough that the memory is fading a little. You have to think back on it and keep yourself there, in that moment, to remember all the detail. It’s all still there, in your head.
Finally, you start to type.
“Hi Minnie. I had a rough day today…I hope I get to see you again soon.”
You stare at it until Choonhee clears her throat in an attempt to get your attention.
You read it once more, then send it.
“Okay, dinner is served. Eat and tell me what’s been bothering you.”
You set your phone face down on the table and take a few bites before getting into it. Starting the conversation will be the most difficult.
So you just start.
“This is a little bit my fault, isn’t it?” Choonhee listened quietly, but you could tell she wasn’t expecting this to be about him. “I pushed this on you. I knew he spoke to you back in…June? I think it was June. But I didn’t know you saw each other again after the first date.”
“Yeah, there was a second date. And a third. And, well…ya know.”
Her eyebrows raise, “what? Fourth, fifth?”
“No, we slept together.”
She’s silent for a long moment, but her eyes remain fixed on you.
“When I went home in July. Remember?”
She’s still silent.
“I haven’t seen him since then.”
“Seungmin doesn’t like opening up to people. He doesn’t do that. Or he didn’t, at least. Are you sure you didn’t just…dream it?”
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I didn’t dream about having sex with him and then convince myself it really happened.”
Choonhee throws her hands up and waves your remark away, “okay I’m sorry, I’m just…surprised. I mean, even the multiple dates is a little surprising.”
“Then why did you even set us up?”
She shrugs, and then struggles to find the right words, “I don’t know…you were both here, and alone. I didn’t want you to spend the holiday by yourself. I thought you’d like him…I guess I was right. I’m not usually good with matches.
“So…are you saying I should just move on?”
“No, absolutely not! Text him right now, and tell him you want to see him when he gets home. He doesn’t get to fuck and run. I don’t care who he is.”
She goes quiet for a few seconds, but you can tell she’s frustrated and deep in thought. “I knew you’d like him. I’m sorry, I made this mess. If he doesn’t get himself together and talk to you like he should, I’ll go find him myself.”
———
By the time your text message gets to Seungmin, he’s home, undressed, and about to hop into a very hot shower. He smiles when he reads Minnie, because in the far too few messages exchanged, you’ve mostly called him Seungmin. His smile fades when he reads the rest.
He knows he’s been bad at this. Not just bad, actually—he’s been pathetic. He’s ghosted you, and strung you along for weeks.
No, he thinks. It’s been months of sporadic texting. Every time he was home, or close to home, he ignored you. Not maliciously, of course, and ignored is a strong word. He messaged you, but it really was the bare minimum. Especially after the last time you were together; you gave yourself to him, and Seungmin took all that he could.
Now he can’t admit to you how much it scared him.
He sets his phone down for now, and climbs into the shower—because once again, his mind, body, and everything in between is tired.
He’s so tired, he feels like he could cry. Maybe if he just let go, let himself wrap around someone and cry into their chest, he would feel better.
———
“When did he text you last?” Choonhee is cleaning up the table, throwing things into the sink, and generally doing a terrible job of tidying. But she means well, and you let her at it. “Has it been a while?”
“Three days ago, before today. He sent a message while you were in my classroom earlier.”
“Oh, is that who the buzz was? Did you answer back? Maybe you should just make him wait around.”
“I replied right before we ate, only because it took me a while to figure out what to say.”
You’re back on the couch now, phone in hand, eyes staring at the stagnant message thread. Figuring out his schedule is tough sometimes, and you try (and usually fail) to stay off of Twitter and fan sites. Right now you’re sifting through them, though—looking for anything new.
You pull up a few airport photos from earlier today. Seungmin is hidden behind a mask and a hat, but you can see his eyes. He looks tired.
It makes your heart sink. You return to your message thread again and read through the last few texts; they feel more and more impersonal as time goes on, and that makes your heart sink, too.
Maybe he is pulling away from you.
“I know saying this won’t help, but do not let this take over. Don’t let him get into your head like this.”
“It’s too late for that.”
Choonhee grabs your arm and shakes it furiously, “he’s just a guy!”
———
Seungmin is flat on his back, covers fluffed up all around him, a pillow under his head, another under his feet. No matter what he does, he’s uncomfortable. He desperately wants and needs to fall asleep, but it’s alluding him. His brain won’t shut up.
The room is chilly, and that’s usually what does the trick. Cold room, warm bed, and he’s out like a light.
He picks up his phone and reads your text again.
Hi Minnie. I had a rough day today…I hope I get to see you again soon.
If only he could figure out what to say back to you. There are so many things he wants to say, and so few ways he can think of to type it out.
Even if he were to see you face to face, he’d be lost for words. Seungmin is not one to let people in, but he has already let you in.
And now he’s stupidly pushing you away.
He pulls up a photo of you and stares at it. This wasn’t the way he planned on relaxing, but his hand is finding it’s way under his shirt anyway, touching his stomach, slowly moving downward until reaches the waistband of his sweatpants.
Thinking of your one night together, somehow still vivid in his head after all this time, is enough to get him hard. And looking at you…he runs his hand down the length of his cock, grabs tight, and strokes himself slowly. The breath he lets out is shaky. He has to be quiet.
———
“Is he?” You look at her, only slightly defeated. “…just a guy?”
“You slept with him, you should know.”
“He’s not.”
The look she gives you is almost enough to make you rethink what you just said.
“I promise you, beneath everything, he’s like any other guy you’ve dated who got too close, freaked out, and disappeared.”
You shake your head. Then your phone buzzes in your hand, and the feeling makes your heart jump to your throat, and your stomach sink all at once. You don’t immediately move your eyes to the screen—you can’t.
“Was that him?”
Now you look. SM. You nod.
you still want to see me?
You will see him again, and you’ll tell him exactly how you feel.
“What did he say?”
You turn your phone so Choonhee can read the message. She rolls her eyes.
“He sounds like a guy. I’m sorry I got you into this…but, you are going to see him again I assume.”
“Yeah, of course.”
———
It’s not until you’re in bed, hours later, that you open his text in an attempt to answer. But it might be better to do this in the morning, because sending one and waiting for his reply is going to keep you up all night.
You stare anyway, trying to get your thoughts in order; your words, your feelings. Do you want him to know how you really feel now, or when you have him in front of you? Can you even get the right words out when he’s in front of you?
You open your notes app and begin working on a reply.
You know I want to see you, Seungmin. I’m trying to be patient and understanding, but it’s so hard when you’re on my mind every day. I hope you’re getting some rest, and I hope you’re doing well. And I hope I can see you before you leave again.
You fall asleep writing. And in the morning, there he is again. One text message sent at 5am.
I’m so sorry. I should have made time for you in October, but every time I wanted to ask you, I froze, I don’t know why, I have no excuse
For a moment, you think you accidentally sent the rough draft of your text in your sleep. You didn’t. This was just him, awake before dawn, finally giving you something sincere. Now you have to rethink your reply.
The typing notification pops up while you’re reading over his message again. Still awake at 6:45.
I remember you telling me you wake up at the same time every morning... Good morning
You feel like crying again. But not like yesterday.
“Good morning” is the best you can come up with this early. He’ll have to wait.
———
Seungmin falls asleep, eventually, but not comfortably.
He gets up from bed to clean himself up, change (he’s warm now, so he opts for less clothes), and hopefully he’ll still be a little bit tired by the time he hits the bed again.
At 4:45am, his body decides he’s had enough. Now he’s awake, eyes still closed, bed far too warm. He throws off the blankets and flips onto his back.
Immediately, and not surprisingly, Seungmin’s thoughts turn to you. You’re sleeping soundly, he hopes, unlike him. He imagines you in the bed he’s never seen; curled up, tucked in. Maybe if he was there with you, he could sleep.
Every time he gets back home, he tries to push himself again, and he fails. He did it in October, and then again in September, right before his birthday. He knows he can’t keep doing this to you.
He pulls out his phone and opens your message thread.
…I hope I get to see you again soon
Seungmin stops thinking and just types:
“I’m so sorry. I should have made time for you in October…”
He stops and reads it. October. He was busy with the album release, but if he looks back in his messages again, he can count the number of texts he sent on one hand. You sent just as many…well, one more than him. That last message he didn’t even reply to. You must have been fed up with him and his lack of communication. And you had every right to be.
“…but every time I wanted to ask you, I froze, I don’t know why, I have no excuse.”
This part is true. Seungmin is almost freezing again right now.
“I don’t know how to explain…”
Now he thinks.
“…how all of this is making me feel. Maybe I’m…”
Seungmin backspaces the last sentence before he even finishes it. And then he hits send.
At 6:45, he’s still wide awake. He remembers you telling him your alarm is always set for this time, so he sends one more message.
And you reply. He was right, you were awake. Just a good morning, though. He’s sure it’s far too early for you to deal with his wishy-washy bullshit.
———
When he doesn’t text again by lunch time, you decide he’s waited long enough. And you can’t waste time, really. He might not be in town for long.
“I want to see you, and I will see you. Today, tomorrow, it doesn’t matter. But I need it to be soon. Neither of us are allowed to be nervous anymore.”
It’s better, you decide, than whatever you wrote last night.
He’s silent as you drift through the rest of the school day (you assume he’s having trouble thinking of a reply to that), and right as the class is gathering their things and leaving, another teacher sneaks in and approaches you. Then you realize it’s not a teacher, but you recognize her. She’s a secretary you’ve spoken to a few times before.
She nods to you and smiles. “I know you’re on your way out, but there’s a visitor for you, a parent who insisted I bring them right to you. It seemed important.”
You have very specific times for parent/teacher visits, and this is not one of them. And there is nobody else who would visit you. You’re confused. “Okay, send them in…I guess.”
You look down at your phone—you doubt it, but maybe you missed a text message or a call. No, nothing.
“Hello.”
The way his voice floats over to you almost knocks you out, and when you turn to meet his eyes, your throat refuses to let you release the air in your lungs.
“Your last text was very insistent. I know this probably is not the best approach…but I haven’t been doing a very good job of anything lately.”
Still you just stare at him, lost for words. You look around your classroom, then down at yourself. This is not how you wanted to see him again, but do you have any room to complain?
He takes a few steps toward you, “was this a bad idea?”
You manage to shake your head and swallow. And then you realize your legs still work, with some effort. Two steps later, your arms wrap around his waist, your face disappears in his sweatshirt, and you squeeze.
His tiny, relieved laugh is music to your ears, and then his hands slide across your back until he’s fully embraced you.
You keep him there for a long time, and he doesn’t protest or try to pull you away. When he does speak again, it’s a question.
“How was your day?”
You slowly release him, but making eye contact is a bit of a challenge. “It’s better now.” So you fall apart when he does show up; no strong words, no looks of disbelief at his absence. You knew this would happen.
“Where can I take you? Home? Or…anywhere you want.”
“Home is good.”
“Okay, there’s a ride waiting for us.” He moves his hands up and over your shoulders, and he rests them on either side of your neck. “I understand if you’re angry with me, and if you stay that way.”
“I am. I don’t want to be.”
Seungmin leans closer, and he moves painfully slow, but eventually he makes it to your mouth. His kiss is light and short, but he keeps going back to peck at your lips, over and over, until you open up and hold him there.
Finally, clear memories of Chicago fill you up. His scent and his touch pull you right back, and you hope he remembers it like you do.
———
It feels like your first date. A quiet car ride, a slow ride up the elevator, an awkward, unsure walk down the hallway to your apartment door. Then walking into your messy living room.
“Are you hungry? I can order something for us,” he says as he’s carefully removing his shoes. “And we can talk while we wait.”
“Yeah, that’s a good idea. I’ll make some coffee.”
Seungmin doesn’t follow you to the kitchen, like he’s done a few times before. Instead, he sits on the couch, situating himself so he can still see you.
You try not to look at him as you work, but you fail, several times. He smiles every time your eyes meet, but it’s a sad smile. It’s not one you’re used to seeing.
“No small talk,” you tell him as you hand him his coffee. “I’ll lose my mind.”
“No small talk.” He nods.
“Where have you been?” You start, staring down at your mug. “Not physically, I know that already. I mean…in every other way.”
“Uhm—“ Seungmin thinks. His face twists a little, probably in confusion. “Where have I…”
“Mentally,” you can’t take your eyes off of him now. “Emotionally.”
“Oh, okay I understand.” He clears his throat, adjusts himself. “It’s been hard to keep my thoughts organized lately. It’s not just that I’ve been busy with work…I haven’t been sleeping well.”
“I’m sorry.”
Seungmin shakes his head, “I could’ve fixed it, I’m sure. If I would’ve just talked about things with you a while ago, I probably would have slept easier.”
“I kept you up?”
“Yes. Well, thinking about you. I do think about you, all the time, even if I haven’t kept in touch. But I’ve been over complicating things, I think.”
“Talk to me now. Please.”
You think you can see his cheeks turning pink. His eyes are wide and shiny, but he’s unsure.
“I know, Seungmin…it is hard. It’s been hard for me, and I feel like it’s been a little more difficult for you. I kept everything to myself all this time, up until yesterday.”
He gives you another questioning look.
“Choonhee forced it out of me.”
He nods, sets his coffee down, and swings his legs up on the couch. Something about him making himself more comfortable puts you at ease. You remember him mentioning before that he felt relaxed being here, alone with you. "I don’t feel any pressure here." You hope he still feels that way.
“Tell me what you told her.”
“She did most of the talking.”
“Then what did Choonhee tell you?”
“That you’re just a guy, and I shouldn’t let you get to me like this.”
Seungmin actually nods at that—but he’s not looking you in the eyes now, so maybe he’s just…thinking about it. Or maybe he’s agreeing. You don’t know where this is going yet.
“I am just a guy, she’s right. I don’t want to be just a guy, though. Not to you.”
“Oh…”
“I thought I knew what was going on when we were together in Chicago, and I thought I knew what I wanted. I’ve been thinking all this time that if this couldn’t be a normal, traditional relationship, you would not be happy, not satisfied. And you’d tell me you weren’t interested in me anymore. I thought you would tell me you couldn’t do it.”
You almost interject; tell him that’s never what you expected of him. You wouldn’t never do that. Why didn’t you say that before? Instead, you used the hypothetical “if you weren’t who you are” question on him. You remain quiet, though, hoping he continues.
“…what I’ve been doing isn’t much better than what I’ve been afraid of. But you’re very smart, and I always knew that.”
You just smile at him, waiting for more.
“That’s why you were so worried when you found out who I was. You know this is much more complicated than that.”
Seungmin goes quiet after that, relaxes against the arm of the couch. You’re on the opposite side, doing the same. You watch each other carefully , but nobody makes a move, and nobody starts to speak.
You wonder if there was something you could have done to avoid all of this drama. Four and a half months of wondering; of being so down you can barely make it to work some days. Both of you have been really bad at this.
“Yes, I know it’s complicated.”
He’s biting his lip. Tapping his foot. It’s almost touching you, and you want to stretch your leg out until it does, but right as you tell your brain to do it, his leg slides back. He sits up and leans forward, falls to his knees, and crawls across the couch.
Before you can squeak his name out, he’s straddling you, arms on either side of your waist. And then the full weight of his body is on you. Seungmin sets his head down gently against your chest and relaxes.
You freeze for a few seconds. You have fallen asleep on this couch with him before, but this feels like much more.
He doesn’t say anything, not even when you set your hand on his head—rake your fingers through his hair, wrap your other arm around his shoulders. He sighs, though.
When it feels like you’re drifting off to sleep, he finally speaks. It’s muffled against your shirt.
“You just want me, right?”
“What?”
“Even if nobody is allowed to know. And we can’t go out in public, and I have to pretend you don’t exist.”
“Seungmin, I know that we can’t have a normal relationship. I just want you…and to know that you want me.” You say the last part under your breath.
“I do.”
“You do?”
“Yes. I promise I’ll be better. And that I won’t be afraid to talk to you, and tell you too much.”
“You can tell me whatever you need to.”
“I don’t usually talk much…to anyone.”
It never occurred to you that he didn’t have someone to talk to when he was feeling down, or having a bad day. A bad week. He’s been bottling everything up, just like you have. Maybe for a very long time.
“You can talk to me about your bad days, Minnie, or when you can’t sleep. And about your good days. I would like to be that person.”
“Am I the reason you had a rough day yesterday? Have you had a lot of those?”
“Yeah, I have had a lot of bad days because I missed you.”
“You can tell me about your bad days, too. Even if they were bad because of me.”
“Don’t worry, I will.”
Seungmin laughs, and it shakes your whole body. “Good.”
☾⋆⁺₊⋆
The next morning is almost normal. Your alarm goes off at its regular time—6:45, and you’re tired, which is also normal. The room is chilly, and it’s so warm under the blankets that getting up is nearly impossible. An ordinary morning. The one thing that makes it different is that Seungmin is there when you open your eyes.
The alarm doesn’t even make him stir, but when you finally turn it off, he groans.
“I’m sorry, go back to sleep.”
“Are you going to work?” He asks, eyes closed, voice raspy with sleep.
“No, not today. I found someone to cover for me.”
He smiles and reaches his arm toward you, and he feels blindly around where he thinks you might be. “Why are you so far away?”
You move closer and grab his arm, “I’m right here. Go back to sleep.”
“I’ll try.”
Sleep eventually finds both of you again. When you wake back up a few hours later, he’s still there, breathing deeply, melting into your bed. You need to get up, but you wait a little longer. You really don’t want to wake him right now.
When he eventually wakes up on his own, he’ll feel better.
You close your eyes. And again, you fall asleep.
Something warm against your forehead wakes you up for a third time. Your eyes open and all you see is skin; Seungmin’s neck, his shoulder. The collar of his shirt is loose enough that you can see the start of his chest.
You pull him closer and push your face into him. He smells good. He smells like sleep and sweat and whatever leftover cologne is still stuck to him from yesterday.
Part of you still wants to keep your guard up. He’ll be gone soon, and then you’ll have to wait and see if his confidence and trust in you remains, and if he’ll really feel comfortable telling you the things he doesn’t tell anyone else.
“I can start,” you say, face still in his chest. You move up toward his neck and set your lips against his skin.
“Start what?”
“After we were together last, in Chicago, and we didn’t…use a condom. I did get a morning after pill, and I took it.”
He pulls you away so he can look at you.
“My period came really late after that, so I thought it didn’t work. And I was really scared. But I didn’t tell anyone. I didn’t tell you because we hadn’t talked very much that week, and you didn’t need that on your mind anyway.”
“I’m sorry you had to deal with that alone.”
“Everything turned out okay.”
“You can talk to me any time you need to, even if I’ve been quiet.”
You nod, and you really want to believe him.
“Too soon for babies.” He whispers, just loud enough for you to hear him. He has a little smirk on his face, but he’s avoiding eye contact and staring at the little bit of space between you.
“You want them?”
“Hm?” Now he makes eye contact, and his ears are slowly turning red. “Uhm…yes, I always have. Do you?”
Having kids isn’t something you’ve thought about much (aside from the scare you had in July), because you haven’t met anyone you would want to have kids with. Well, until now, because looking at Seungmin and the sweet smile on his face is making you want them immediately. But you know that’s not possible for him.
“With the right person, yeah.”
“I’m sure someday I’ll be able to do that. Have the time to be there, for both of them. You and baby. I couldn’t be gone all the time and leave you alone.”
He stops for a second. You wonder if he’s even hearing himself speak.
“…Seungmin?”
“It was my turn to tell you something personal.” He brings his hands up to his face and rubs his cheeks, then his eyes. “Just in case I’m the right person.”
The conversation feels like too much, too soon. But you like it. He’s only been open with you like this once before: on your second date, when he admitted to being worried you’d like his friends more than him. You thought that was silly then, and now…you’re not sure you could like anyone more than Seungmin.
“…and if I’m your right person.”
Seungmin smiles and hides his face in the pillow.
———
As the day goes on, you wonder how long he’ll be here with you. Every time he looks at a message on his phone, you assume that will be his cue to get going—to start saying goodbye. But he’s still here, and he seems content.
It was his idea to stay, and he insisted on making breakfast.
“What do you normally do on your days off?” is what he asked as you sat and ate.
So it’s been a regular day off, aside from the fact that Seungmin is also here with you…eating, cleaning, sorting laundry, watching tv, and eventually, catching up with schoolwork.
He sits down next to you on the couch when you open your binder and pull out a stack of papers. He watches quietly as you shuffle though them, putting the pages in order before you start to look them over properly.
He picks the next one up before you get to it. “How old are your students again?”
“They are eight…a few are nine.”
“I don’t remember my English classes being this complicated when I was…older than them.”
“You should see their math homework.”
“Oh, I was very good at math!”
“Yeah?” You look at him, give him your full attention. “There’s so much I don’t know about you.”
“Not even what’s on the internet?” Seungmin leans back against the couch, and pulls you with him.
“I’ve read a few things. But I’m sure you’re a lot more complicated than your fun facts.”
“I hope so.” He grabs you around the waist, “what were you good at in school?”
“English…” you laugh. “And I did pretty good in my German class, and history.”
“Do you speak German, too?” He’s holding you tight, head resting on your shoulder.
“No, I’ve forgotten almost all of that.”
“Why did you come here, to Korea?
You turn yourself to look at him, disturbing his resting head. But he keeps his arms around you.
“So close to Samseong-Dong?”
“I felt like I needed to start over after I graduated college, and this seemed like the perfect way to do it. I actually almost went to Japan.”
“Why didn’t you? Where did you go to college?”
“Northwestern University. And I missed a deadline. Luckily, I already had applications submitted to a few different programs here and nearby.”
“And you chose here?”
Seungmin’s hands wander throughout the entire conversation, stopping when they reach just below where the hem of your shirt hits.
“They chose me.”
“That’s very lucky.” They slide underneath and up your back, “maybe we were meant to meet each other.”
“I’m not sure I believe in things like that.” You move yourself closer to him, until your face is inches from his.
“I don’t either, really. Fate, and soulmates. I’ve been called a…uhm, I don’t remember the English word. A negative person.”
“A pessimist?”
“Yes. Maybe sometimes I am, but…not always. I can be positive. I just like to be realistic.”
“A pragmatist.” You lean in and kiss the corner of his mouth.
“Mhm, both of those P words. I did get lucky, though.” He pushes forward, gently coaxing you to your back.
“Was it there before?” You ask. He’s hanging over you, studying your face. “Before Chicago, after I asked if you would date me?“
“Was what there? You mean, did I like you?”
“Yes, but…more than that. Or was it spending the night together?”
“It was before that. That’s why I wanted to spend the night with you.”
You nod, trying hard not to beam up at him. But his hands are on your sides, and his fingertips are moving so delicately over you, you can’t help but smile.
“When was it there for you?”
Your heart starts beating a little faster. You have no answer ready for him except the truth.
“When you gave me Pochacco.”
“On our first date? At the coffee shop?”
You throw your hands over your face and nod, “yeah, at the coffee shop.”
“I felt kind of silly giving him to you, I thought you would think it was silly, too.” He pulls your hands away so he can see your face again.
“It wasn’t.”
“So PuppyM wasn’t silly either?”
“No, I love him. And your denim jacket you left, that’s hanging on my bedpost. I love all of your gifts.”
“Oh, I forgot about that jacket!”Seungmin comes down and settles himself against you, face in your neck, hands wondering more.
“You can have it back, if you want.”
“No, you keep it. But I do need something of yours to keep with me.” His hands slide under your shirt and across your stomach. He tickles your side again, then stops when he reaches your hip.
You’re surprised at his restraint.
“I’m sure I have something for you.” You set your hand over his and slide it up his arm. Then back down.
His fingers twitch and push under your shorts. As ready as you were, and as much as you wanted him to make that move, your breath still catches in your throat.
He props himself up with his other arm and looks at you. His fingers touch lightly over your underwear, taking his time, getting himself where he needs to be.
But you’re not taking your time. And it’s Seungmin touching you, so your body is already on fire. You push your hips up and push his hand harder against you.
His fingers slide up and sneak beneath the fabric. He moves slowly, and he’s watching you carefully, as if you might protest.
But of course you don’t. You grip his arm and slide your hand from his bicep down to his wrist, moving with him as his fingers slip inside of you.
“Am I doing okay?” He leans closer and whispers. He doesn’t wait for an answer before pulling out and sliding back over your clit, making you choke on your answer.
You manage a shaky mhm and Seungmin giggles into your ear. His fingers stay put, making soft circles around you, keeping his touch as delicate as possible. Then he takes them off again, and he pushes back inside.
The reach of is fingers is enough to hit just the right spot, and when you jump from the pressure, he does it again and again until he gets a moan out of you.
You lift your hips into his touch and pull him down for a kiss. Your grip on his arm tightens and he eases up, but barely. His mouth is working its way across your neck now, leaving you free to moan.
“Do you do this a lot?” He says as he nibbles across your ear and cheek. When he gets to your lips, he hangs above you and holds your gaze. His thumb slides over your clit again, like he wanted to remind you of what he was talking about.
“Uhh…hmm?” You slide your hand up and grab a handful of his hair. “Yes.” You laugh and knead your fingertips into his scalp—it makes his eyes roll back. He’s in your neck again, savoring his little massage.
“Do you think about me when you do it?”
His question sends another wave of pleasure through you. His fingers slip inside again, pressing hard. His thumb is on your clit, wet and sliding easily and hitting everywhere you need it to.
There’s hot, heavy breathing in your ear, and a sweet whisper, “do you think about me, hm?”
“Every time,” your climax hits fast, and Seungmin knows he’s succeeded by the way you’re pulling at his hair.
He holds himself up just enough to watch you squirm beneath him. His touch softens even more as you start to relax, and when you stop and stare up at him, he comes down and kisses across your forehead and down the side of your face. He lets you catch your breath before moving to your lips.
“Really?” Seungmin blushes and tries to stifle his laugh in your neck.
You nod slowly, “that was…very good.”
“Thank you.”
“Too good, maybe.”
“I did some research.”
“You did not.” But when you think about it for a second, it does seem like something Seungmin would do. “Did you?”
“Just a little. In case I’d get to try it out on you someday.”
———
Seungmin looks carefully across your desk, touching the books stacked there, the loose sheets of composition paper, the notes and pencils. He sits in your chair and opens the drawer—inside are a few notebooks, all used and full. He shuffles things around a little, searching every inch.
Now he gets up and moves to your bookshelf. It’s more of a trinket shelf, though. Seungmin only runs his eyes over this, until he catches sight of a snow globe. He picks that up and shakes it. Inside is the Chicago skyline.
He stares at it for a long moment, then returns it to his spot. His attention turns to you, on the bed.
You just smile at him. He keeps looking around.
The next stop is your bedside table. You sit up when he sits down on the edge of the bed, run your hand down his back. As soon as he opens it, he whispers an ooh, and reaches inside.
“What did you find?” You laugh.
“Me,” he holds up three photocards with his face on them.
You take them from him and fall back on the bed, “you”, and look deeply at paper Seungmin.
“Hey, I’m right here…” he pushes your hand away and bends down to kiss you. “Real me.”
The next thing pulled from the drawer is a journal. He looks it over, but doesn’t open it.
“That’s you, too.”
Seungmin points to it, and his head tilts, “this is me?”
“Yeah, almost every page.”
His face goes from confusion to understanding, and then it falls a little.
“You should add one more page.”
“I will.”
The journal goes back in, and then his fingers close around something small. When he pulls it out, it catches the light and throws a reflection across the room.
“Oh, I haven’t worn this since last time.” You sit up and Seungmin hands you the bracelet. It’s only a tiny gold chain, but at the very end of it is a star charm.
“This.” He says, and he watches as you unclasp it, wrap it around his wrist, and close it again.
☾⋆⁺₊⋆
An hour after Seungmin left your house the last time, he sent you a text that just said “I’m home”. That was a first, and it felt like a good omen. But only time would tell. He never really had a good start with keeping in touch.
But he also said goodnight. And then he said good morning. And sometimes he called just to tell you instead of texting.
Actually, this morning, almost two months later, he called early in the morning, when you were still asleep. You caught his name on the lock screen before you picked up, but you still lacked the energy for anything more than a groggy morning Min.
Luckily, he can make up in enthusiasm what you lack some days.
“I’m sorry, you’re still asleep,” he whispers.
“No, it’s okay. I’m just being lazy. What are you up to this morning?” You also caught sight of the time before answering: 10am, way too late for you to sleep in.
“Catching a flight home, from Thailand. Waiting around.” Now you can hear the sleep still lingering in his voice.
“Oh right. I forgot you were there…I did see some photos. You looked very handsome in your safety glasses.”
“Thank you,” he laughs. “I was calling to…uhm, say good morning, and also to see if you would be home tonight.”
“Minnie, I’m always home.”
“That’s true, but it would still be rude to just show up unannounced.”
“I give you permission to show up unannounced.”
“Can I have a key, too? Oh, that reminds me…uuh, well, actually I’ll just talk to you about it later.”
“Okay, don’t forget. And yes you can have a key.”
———
This is the first time you’re not nervous about Seungmin coming over. Well, not as nervous as you typically would be. You’re still a little on edge—a little worried about how you look and about how your food is going to taste.
He didn’t mention anything about coming over hungry, but you’re taking the initiative anyway. If anything, he’ll have something to take home with him.
A soft knock at the door. You know his soft, steady knock, and you never have any other visitors, so it’s him. But for some reason you stand there stupidly, not moving, not saying anything, because you know it’s really him on the other side of your door.
Finally, after a few seconds, you take a breath. “It’s open.”
The door swings open.
“Hi,” Seungmin closes it quietly, takes off his shoes and looks at you from across the room. “It smells very good in here.”
“I wasn’t sure if you’d eaten so…”
“No, nothing since lunch.” He takes a few long strides toward you. Big blue sweatshirt, matching sweatpants, a big smile. “So I’m very hungry,” he embraces you and squeezes you tight against his chest. “How have you been?” He relaxes, but he doesn’t let you free.
“I’ve been okay...I’ve been good.”
“I’m sorry I couldn’t visit around Christmas—oh!” He bends down and kisses you.
He kisses for a long time—long enough that you think you might end up in bed before you even eat dinner. But he slows down, and then releases you.
“Happy new year! A little late.” He comes down again for one more kiss, and then makes his way to the kitchen. “What did you make? Something American? It smells like something American.”
“Yes. It’s very American.”
“Should we eat first, or talk?”
“I’m sure we can manage both.”
———
The two of you stare at each other from across your tiny kitchen table. Seungmin sips his tea. You just watch and wait, because this is his conversation.
“Do you want me to start? Something about you having a key to my apartment?”
“Ah, yeah. Yes, I should have a key, but I was thinking of a different apartment.”
“Oh, like yours? No, you don’t have an apartment. Or do you?” You lean a little closer, “secret apartment?”
“No, no secret apartment,” he laughs. “But I thought it would be nice if you lived closer. Closer to the city, and closer to me.”
“That would be nice, but I’m not sure something closer is in my budget.”
“I know,” Seungmin smiles—there’s always something so clever and knowing about his smile. “I figured you might say that. I could help.”
“You want to help me with rent? Expensive rent. That’s kind of serious.”
“I do! It is serious. I am serious.”
“You are?” You sit back in your chair and study his face. He’s still smiling and nodding at you.
“Yes, I’ve been thinking about it for…almost two months. And I found somewhere I think would fit very well.”
“Closer to you?”
“Much closer. I could walk to you.”
You’re thinking, but you’re not really thinking. The obvious answer to this is yes, even though it’s hard to just come out and say it. The idea of someone else helping with rent, or helping with anything, is foreign to you. “I would like to be closer to you.”
Seungmin looks at his phone, pulls something up on it, and then slides it to you across the table. “How is something like this?”
You trust Seungmin’s taste and judgement, but you still want to look it over thoroughly. Distance, yes, but also the size, the layout. And you do not have enough windows in this apartment. You’d like more windows. If he’s as serious as he looks, it might as well be worth whatever money you’re both going to put into it.
“How about this one?” You pull up a different listing.
He looks it over, “still very close. Oh, two bedrooms. Maybe the extra space would be nice.”
“It is a little more, sorry (Seungmin shakes his head when you say that), but it has a bathtub instead of just a walk-in shower. And it’s own laundry.”
He laughs, “I could do my laundry faster if I bring it with me. And the kitchen is nicer.”
“I miss having a bathtub.” You hand him his phone back. “But are you sure this isn’t too much? I know you said you were serious—“
“I am…I want you to know that I’m very serious. I think this is a good way to show you. And it’s also very practical.”
“You seemed so unsure before. I just want you to be…good. I want both of us to be good.”
“I’m very good.”
“This is a little crazy, isn’t it? All of this.”
“Yes, it is. I’ll call about it tomorrow.”
“No, I can. Let me do that, at least.”
———
“Minnie?”
Mmhm?
You sat on the couch after dinner, and it didn’t take much time before he had you on your back. He lifts your shirt as far as this position will allow, letting his fingers dance over you—making you squirm a little from how soft his touch is.
Forming the words you want to say is much harder than you thought. They’re dancing around in your head; you’re moving them back and forth, but every way it comes together feels like too much or not enough. Maybe right now just isn’t he time.
“What’s wrong?”
You pull your shorts down, open your legs for him, then shake your head. “Nothing.”
Seungmin reaches down and feels you, slips his fingers inside, then slowly pulls them back out. He smiles against your mouth and pushes in again, just to feel how wet you are. “Are we okay here…are you comfortable?” He asks sweetly. His fingers are still inside, moving delicately.
You nod, but suddenly you remember that you are not good, and you’re not ready. “Shit, no we’re not good. We need a condom this time.”
“Oh right, we should be safe. Tell me where they are,” he adjusts his sweatpants and very carefully lifts himself off of you.”
“In my black bag, under my bed.”
You listen as he slides it out and digs around. The contents of that bag are a mystery, but the condoms you bought back in Chicago, both boxes, have to be in there still. You’re not that bad at unpacking, but if it’s something you don’t use, you’re definitely going to forget I’m about it under there forever.
When he comes back in, he has one in each hand.
“I’m….not sure which one is for me.” His voice seems a little dejected. He’s looking down at them as he approaches you.
“Oh Minnie, they were both for you. I bought these a while ago, when I didn’t know which would fit you better.”
“Oh,” he finally makes eyes contact again. His face softens a little. “Sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“It’s okay, come here.” You spread your legs again and wait for him, “I’ll put it on for you.”
He crawls back onto the couch, settles between your legs, and opens both hands, palms up, in front of you.
You take the right one and rip it open. Seungmin looks like his mind is suddenly full. His eyes are big and soft.
“Min, what’s on your mind?”
His hands are already on his sweatpants, pulling them down his hips.
“You are.”
You touch him, slide your fingertips down, and then back up. The condom goes on easily. “Does it feel okay?”
He nods and adjusts, makes himself comfortable, and lifts your legs until he has more room. He pushes in a halfway, then leans over until you’re almost nose to nose.
“Minnie?”
“Hmm?” He sets his forehead against yours.
“There’s only you.”
“Just me?” He pushes his nose into yours, “only me?” Pecks at your lips.
“Just us.”
“Only us.” Seungmin pushes the rest of the way in, waits a moment, then begins to fuck you slowly and deeply, “you’re all mine.” He whispers in your ear as he drags his lips over it.
It takes you a second to pull yourself together. Each thrust sends you upward and knocks the breath out of you, but you manage a nod.
“Tell me,” he quickens his pace. The couch shakes the end table, and you can hear the clatter of things falling to the floor. “Tell me you’re mine.”
“I’m yours.”
It comes out shaky, and it’s not good enough for you. But Seungmin is still smiling. You try again
“I’m yours,” you grab the back of his neck and hold him still, “I only love you.” Your hand grabs hair and pulls—lips close on his before he has a chance to speak.
But he sighs into the kiss. He slows down, and it feels like he’s melting into you more and more with each thrust. What little skin is exposed between the two of you slides together, damp with sweat, and Seungmin kisses every part of you he can get to in the position he’s in.
He tries to get rid of your shirt, but he can’t stop, and he has to stop to make any progress—so you clumsily lift it, and your bra, until you’re free.
His hand slides up your ribs and his fingers graze over you, but for now he just watches how he’s making your body move under him. He seems hypnotized, but eventually he blinks, and then his eyes are fixed on yours again.
The room is quiet—no ambient noise from the tv, no music, nothing. The only sounds are the heavy breaths and soft moans you’re sharing. The condom is slowing him down, keeping him here much longer, and everything feels good in this position; good enough that you’d be satisfied staying like this as long he needs it.
He made you come last time, and now you want to do the same for him.
You lift him off of you until you can see him better.
He looks you in the eyes again, satisfied and smiling. “You feel so good,” he’s back down again, mouth on your chest, kissing down until he can close his lips around your nipple. He licks and works his way back up, stopping at your throat and staying there, his warm breath hitting you. “You love me?”
Your heart jumps. It was already racing, but now you feel it everywhere. In your throat, your chest, your head. You don’t think you’ve ever told anyone that before; not so soon. It’s been a year, but tonight is only the sixth time you’ve seen him and touched him. Everything else has been texts, phone calls, video calls.
It doesn’t matter. You said it because it felt right, and it still feels right.
“Yes.”
Seungmin slows his pace. His exhales turns into a string of soft, dulcet moans. He lifts himself upright and holds your hips as he rolls into you. He comes quietly. You wouldn’t have even realized if you weren’t looking right him.
The satisfied look on his face makes your stomach swirl. You watch Seungmin smile before your eyes close, and you can hear him whisper something to you while you’re coming down from your own high.
He pulls out and carefully brings your legs together.
“What did you say?”
“I didn’t say anything, love.” He sits you up next to him and pulls your t-shirt over your head, “I was just…” he pulls you close, “nothing, it’s not important right now.”
“Will you stay here tonight?”
“Yes, I’ll stay.”
———
It’s been a long six weeks. You’re a little stressed out, but you’ve been holding yourself together very well, you think.
This apartment has been your only home for more than three years, so packing your things up and preparing to leave has been a little bit emotional. Almost everything is out of here and all that’s left are a few things you’re taking along on the last car ride.
Before this, everything was moving in slow motion and it was killing you. Now, it won’t slow down. You’re happy, and you’re grateful for everything that Seungmin has done for you…and it’s still sometimes hard to believe he’s doing it all just for you. But it’s so much all at once.
He told you he would stay tonight—your first night there. You haven’t received a text telling you otherwise, so you’re hoping he will be there when you arrive. You do have to remember that you’ll be there alone most of the time, though.
Some things will remain the same.
———
The elevator ride up is long, and you think back to you and Seungmin—your first date, bringing him home with you to your 5th floor apartment, thirty minutes out of the way, just to have him to yourself.
That was probably a good indication that he liked you. You just didn't realize it at the time.
You finally stop at the 17th floor.
The original apartment you looked at was unavailable when you called the next morning, so Seungmin insisted on taking everything into his own hands while you were at work. He knew what you were looking for, but he went overboard.
This apartment has the windows, the bathtub, and laundry room, but it also has double the space—and three bedrooms. When you asked what you were supposed to do with all of the extra room, Seungmin shrugged and said we’ll figure something out.
You don’t even own enough to fill up half of it. Everything that required any sort of muscle; the bed, the living room furniture, it all stayed behind. Most of the things in this apartment are new, or they will be new.
Before you have a chance to explore any further than the kitchen, you hear a very faint, soft knock on the door. You know it’s him and you run to open it, but he punches in a code on the doorknob, turns it, and peeks in before you get there.
“I tried to beat you here.” He smiles.
“You almost did.“
He closes the space between you and pulls you into a hug. “How was your day? Did the movers get everything here?”
“It was alright, and…I think so, but I haven’t gotten any further than this.”
“Just alright? I know it’s been a lot lately.”
“I’m better now that I’m here, and you’re here.” You take his face in your hands and squeeze his cheeks, “let me see, smile.”
Seungmin smiles widely and dramatically, and then bends down to kiss you. “How do I look?”
You pull him back for another one, “still handsome.”
He picks up the bags he walked in with and sets them on the kitchen chair. “I brought us dinner, and a few things to make you feel more at home.” Seungmin is pulling the food out of the bag, piece by piece. “So you didn’t see the bedroom yet?”
“Not yet, why?”
He shakes his head and smiles, “we’ll see it later.”
“What did you bring me?”
“Oh, let’s see!” He starts digging in the other bag.
You watch as he carefully places an assortment of things along side the food. There’s a candle, two candles, a small picture frame, but you can’t see the photo from where you’re standing. A stuffed dog. Another stuffed dog. One of them is Pochacco, the other is a mystery, but he does look familiar.
“That’s all for now but I do have more stuff to bring.”
“Well, we have plenty of space to fill.”
He beams at you, grabs one of the stuffed dogs, and pulls you against him. “This wasn’t mine, but I have one just like it.”
“I like him, he looks like you.”
Seungmin laughs and looks at Daengmo, “yes, he kind of does.”
———
When the sun goes down, and you’re both full and relaxing, you begin to feel even more nostalgic for the conversations you had and the memories you made with him at your old place, on your old couch. You have to work on new memories now.
He’s facing you on the new couch, eyes closed, slow, steady breaths. The flicker of the tv is hitting his face, making his cheek and the soft brown of his hair glow.
Very slowly, you reach your foot out and touch his.
Seungmin’s eyes open, and he gives you a sleepy smile, “how was dinner?”
“Good.” You sit up and move closer to him, “we should go to bed while you’re still sleepy.”
He groans and shrugs his shoulders.
“We gotta go see the bedroom, remember?” You grab his hand and pull a little, and he immediately gives in.
The bedroom is warm and cozy, like it’s already been lived in. You know Seungmin came in at some point and made it this way; the curtains are pulled, the soft amber lights are clicked on, and one of the candles he brought is lit on the bedside table. Both of the stuffed dogs he brought, and your PuppyM, are already laying on top of the pillows.
The bed is made, but not too made. The blankets are loose and fluffed up, ready to crawl into.
“How does it look?” He sounds a little more awake now.
“It looks perfect, come on.”
He shakes his head, “If we don’t brush our teeth now, we will never get back up to do it.” He smiles and kisses you softly.
“Yeah, you’re right.”
———
The lights are off, the candle is out. Seungmin is facing you in bed.
“Are you awake? Did you lose your sleepy?”
“A little.”
He scoots closer until his arm can drape over you. The bedroom is bigger, and the bed is bigger, too. You’re sharing one side just to be close to each other.
“It will come back soon.”
You set your forehead against his chest and feel it move steadily with each breath. It's quiet for a long time, and now sleep is really escaping you. You should be able to relax like this; you’ve shared a bed with him a few times before, and you haven’t slept as well since. And you’re tired—too tired. Maybe too exhausted for sleep.
You wonder if he’s awake, or if he’s quiet because he thinks you’ve finally drifted off.
You run your hand gently over his arm, waiting for a reaction. At first, he doesn’t make a move or a sound, but when you slide your hand back up, he moves his leg against yours.
“Can’t sleep?” He whispers
“Did I wake you?”
“You didn’t.”
“Then no, I can’t sleep.” You prop yourself up on one arm and look down at him. It’s dark, but you can just make out the details of his face.
He flips onto his back and pulls the covers away. “Are you uncomfortable?” Seungmin asks and places his hand on your cheek. He’s warm, his eyes are warm. His mouth parts slowly and turns into a smile. It’s a tired smile. “New bed.”
“New everything.”
“Except for me.”
Your hand closes around his, then you turn your head to place a kiss on the inside of his wrist. “Thank you for being here. I know you’re on a tight schedule.”
Seungmin pulls you down on top of him. His face is in your neck, kissing playfully and lazily, but the way his hands are exploring you is anything but lazy.
“You’re cold,” he stops, wraps his arms around your waist, and holds you there. “You need to be warmed up.”
You get your hands underneath his shirt, “you’re warm enough for both of us.”
“I can share.”
“Can I ask you something stupid?”
“Yes, I would love that,” he laughs softly and disappears in your neck again.
The stupid question bounces around in your head. His warm lips on you are starting to make your head fuzzy, and you wonder if you should just forget it. But now he’ll get it out of you somehow.
“Will you sing for me?”
He pulls back to look at you. Seungmin’s face lights up. It could light up the entire room. “You want me to sing for you?” If he was sleepy at all before, he’s not now. You’ve managed to wake him the rest of the way with a simple, stupid, request. But it wasn’t stupid at all.
“I always have, it just never seemed like a good time.”
“Right now? Should I sing now? Maybe it’s too quiet, and the walls might not be very thick.”
“In the morning?”
He nods, “yes, I’ll sing for you in the morning. What should I sing?”
“Surprise me.”
“We talked about singing together before, remember?”
“I remember,” you wrap around him and pull the covers back up in an attempt to get him sleepy again. “But I’d rather just hear you.”
☾⋆⁺₊⋆
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rogueddie · 2 years
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Steve hates mixtapes, always has. He's made some for girls before, went all out, spent hours making them. But he doesn't get it. He doesn't understand why people like them so much, why people think the effort is worth it.
He remembers how those girls had smiled when he'd given them the mixtapes, remembers how sweet they'd been on him after, how they kept talking about it. Even though it's just some songs he thought they might like. He was never sure how to make any of them romantic, didn't know if they expected any input from him between the songs. He's pretty sure he'll never really get it, but…
He wants to make one for Eddie.
Eddie has been trying so hard to get him to like metal or rock or anything 'alternative'. And Steve doesn't know how to explain what he does or doesn't like, doesn't know how to explain why he likes Sabbath Bloody Sabbath but can't stand T.N.T.
He's tried to explain it. Tried to sit down with Eddie and explain that there is a happy medium betweent he ones too loud and the ones that are just… boring. And Eddie tries to listen, is so clearly trying.
But Steve can't explain it, doesn't know how to. Not without sounding like an idiot, anyway. Telling Eddie that a lot of AC/DC songs don't have enough going on to make his ears feel happy would ruin whatever thing the two of them have going on.
Which is why he's sat on the floor, desperately looking through the tapes Eddie has been forcefully lending him, trying to find the right songs for a mixtape. If he can't explain it to Eddie, maybe he can show him instead.
He refuses to acknowledge to odd bubbling excitement building in his stomach. Eddie is his friend, this isn't romantic. Eddie wants to show him his music, wants to share something he enjoys, there's nothing for Steve to be getting so worked up over. For all he knows, Eddie is straight.
It takes him three weeks to make the mixtape.
"Eddie!" Steve jogs to catch up with him. It's the third time they've run into each other by accident, outside of the kids or Robin. It's the first time that Steves had the mixtape in his pocket, ready.
"Hey Steve," he raises an eyebrow. "What's got you in such a good mood?"
"Day off," Steve lies. "And I'm done with the shit I need to do. Uh, anyway, I have- I mean, it's not… fuck. Ok, here, just…" He awkwardly holds the mixtape out, shifting when Eddie carefully takes it, like it's something precious. "It's, uh… I know you've been, like, struggling to figure out what metal songs I'm into or whatever so… these are the, uh, type. Things. I guess."
Eddie is smiling, small and soft. He hasn't looked up from the track list since he turned it over.
"I'm already noticing a theme." His voice is so gentle, almost adoring, that Steve feels his face heating up. It's only worse when Eddie looks up, turning that smile directly on him. "Thanks Steve."
"Uh, yeah, no worries?" Steve bites at his nail.
"I hope you know that I'm making you one," Eddie raises an eyebrow, smirking. He slowly starts walking around him. "After I'm done with this shelf for Wayne, I'm making you one. I'm gonna rock your world, Harrington."
Steve laughs a little, hopes it doesn't sound as awkward to Eddie as it does to him. "Look forward to it."
Eddie gives him a two finger salute, turning to walk a little faster to his van.
Steve waits until he turns a corner, looking around to make sure no one can see him and doing a little fist pump.
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fettuccin-e · 1 year
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The Wonderful Way Things Change
A/N: hi there everyone... shamefully, very shamefully, I have not posted anything original since i think like february. it was an unplanned hiatus! promise it was completely unplanned, this semester just really kicked my ass lol. BUT HERE WE ARE! with matt smut of course how could I not because he is the loml so please enjoy! love you!
Description: Based off this ask, and can be read as a loose sequel to this (my first ever fanfic oh boy oh boy). In which Foggy calls you to check in on Matt, and the sight of your boyfriend all disheveled in a suit is making you a tad desperate. Thankfully, neither of you have the self-control to keep your hands to yourselves.
Tags: Matt Murdock x Reader, afab!fem!reader, no use of y/n, smut like so much smut who do you think I am, fucking Matty in a suit, oral (f!recieving), unprotected piv (pls wrap it up irl fuck them kids) (w/c: 2.5K)
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Yours and Matt’s relationship is new, somewhat, but you both know that it’s been a long time coming. It’s only been a few weeks since he finally kissed you for the first time, since he healed your poor, pining heart. It’s not like other relationships you’ve had, with the talking stage at the beginning, where you’re still asking each other about your childhoods, favorite movies, and songs. You and Matt already know everything about each other.
He knows about your shitty job that you hate but manages to pay the bills. He knows all about your childhood, all of your hopes and dreams. Up until a few weeks ago, the only secret you’d kept from him was your frankly ridiculous crush on him.
But you know that it’s the same way for him. You already know about Daredevil, and to Matt’s unending surprise, you accept him, love him for who he is. You don’t want him to give up either side of himself; you’re happy to just have him. Matt is still trying to get used to the feeling of actually having you, instead of just being by your side, letting you slip through his fingers.
Up until a few weeks ago, Matt had resigned himself to only being your friend. The friendship he’d found in you at Columbia would remain just that. Unbeknownst to him, you’d resigned yourself the exact same way. But a misunderstanding and a frustrated and ridiculously dramatic love confession later, you’d finally kissed him like he’d only dreamed of. You’d allowed him to touch you like he’d always wanted, and Matt could swear that he’s never felt anything softer, never tasted anything sweeter than you.
So the relationship is new, but it also feels like you and Matt have just been waiting, settling into routines like you’ve been together for years. You know how Matt is, how he’ll bury himself into cases and recordings and court documents, searching for that one bit of evidence that proves his client is innocent. He sends Foggy and Karen home on nights like these, insisting that they need to sleep, that they work too hard as is.
“He’s gonna be there for hours,” Foggy tells you over the phone. “You’ve gotta get him out of there or he’s going to collapse.” You laugh, pulling on your coat and stepping out of Matt’s apartment. 
Ever since you had both confessed your feelings for each other, and Matt had finally, finally taken you to bed, you had more or less moved in. It hadn’t been intentional, nor had Matt officially asked you, but the one time you had broached the subject of maybe sleeping at your own apartment, Matt’s arms had wrapped around you, holding you to him while he pressed desperate kisses all over your face and neck, telling you that his apartment was so cold without you there.
“C’mon, sweetheart, haven’t we spent more than enough time apart?” he had murmured, and you had agreed.
“Yeah, alright Fog, I’m heading over there now. I’ll make sure you have a well-rested partner by tomorrow,” you giggle into the phone, and you laughed even harder at Foggy’s genuine sigh of relief.
“Christ, how did Nelson, Murdock and Page survive without you and Matt together?”
“It’s truly a mystery, Foggy,” you tease, and Foggy laughs with you. He keeps you on the phone the entire walk to their office building, filling you in on the cases he, Karen, and Matt are working on. You could talk to Foggy for hours, really, but he lets you go as you walk up the steps to their offices. With a promise to talk soon, maybe take a trip to Josie’s, you hang up, shoving your phone into your coat pocket.
You can hear the recording Matt is listening to through the door to his office, some judge droning on and on. You enter the room quietly, heart beating wildly at Matt in his sharp suit, without his glasses, hair mussed from his fingers running through it the way they usually do when he’s working through a case. You watch as a smile blooms across his pretty lips, his eyes lifting to your direction as he pauses the recording.
“Hi, baby,” he says, and his sheer beauty in that moment nearly brings you to your knees. This man, with his hair sticking up in every direction, his tie slightly loosened at his chest, big brown eyes and wide smile is yours. All yours. You can’t help how your heart beats even harder at the thought.
You watch his grin meld into a knowing smirk as he listens to the quick pattering of your heartbeat. “Something got you worked up, sweetheart?”
You hum, crossing the room to where he sits in his office chair. “Oh, you know,” you drawl, trying to keep your voice coy and light, even though you know that your heart is giving away your sudden desperation for the man in front of you. “I’m just thinking about all of the things I get to do now.”
“To me?” He’s playing coy too, trying to goad you.
“Always to you, Matty,” you giggle, and he chuckles in return. You swing a leg over his lap, straddling him and relishing in how his chuckle morphs into a choked gasp. 
“What- What kinds of things, gorgeous?” his voice is breathier now, beautifully affected by your actions.
“Just how I can do things like this,” you wrap your hand into his tie, tugging him towards your mouth. “And things like this-” you breathe over his mouth, before capturing his pretty, enticing lips with your own.
Matt groans into the kiss, smoothing his hands over your hips before reaching behind you to grab your ass in his big, thick hands, tugging you further up his lap. Your clothed pussy rests just over the bulge of his cock through his slacks, and you can feel it thickening beneath you. 
“And you call me worked up, Matty?” you murmur against his mouth, wiggling in his lap and pulling a soft moan from his lips.
“When my gorgeous girlfriend walks into my office, smelling like my apartment and so fucking soft on top of me,” he says, squeezing your ass again, “how can you expect me to be calm, baby?”
Your stomach bursts into butterflies at the title. You’re his girlfriend. He’s your boyfriend. It feels so very juvenile, like you’re twenty years old again and still trying to get through calculus class. Maybe it’s because you’ve been waiting that long. Waiting for him, since you first met him and Foggy at Columbia. It feels so far away now, so different, and yet, you still burn bright and warm with Matt’s attention on you. Calling you his girlfriend.
He shifts his hips under yours, the bulge of his thick cock against your pussy impossible to ignore, and you whine, just barely, but Matt hears. Of course he does.
“Oh, sweetheart,” he murmurs. “So fucking needy.” He lurches forward again to press his lips to yours, licking into your mouth. 
“Please, Matty,” you whisper, and he groans into your mouth all over again. He doesn’t separate his mouth from yours as he lifts you against him, using a hand to brush the cumbersome documents and files off the desk behind you, before laying you softly against it, running his hands over your waist and kissing you like you’re something precious. 
But you are, Matt knows that you are the most precious thing in the fucking world. And you want him. Matt can hardly believe it sometimes; he still sometimes thinks he’s dreaming when he feels you in the morning, pressed tight against him, your heart calm and steady with sleep.
He licks into your mouth like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do, and what a way to go. He could stay in this moment forever, kissing you while your hands tangle into his hair. But your sexy little whines are echoing around him, your hips moving in desperate little circles against the aching bulge in his slacks.
“I’ve got you, sweetheart,” he whispers, and you just whine louder. It’s a nearly painful thing, taking his lips from yours, but he can fucking smell your arousal, and the need to dive between your thighs is suddenly too much for him to handle. 
You kind of want to cry when Matt breaks your kiss, but your mourning at the loss of his lips is quickly cut short by his thick, calloused hands pushing your skirt up your thighs, leaving the material to bunch around your waist. He nudges his nose against your clit through your panties, taking a deep breath in through his nose, savoring it, and you nearly black out.
“Oh- oh my God,” you stutter, and Matt smirks in that ridiculously cocky way you hate that you love.
“I mean, I go by Matt, but if you want to call me God-” Matt starts, tugging your panties down your legs.
“Matthew Michael Murdock, I swear-” You want to continue, you really do, but it’s really hard to keep your train of thought when Matt is leaning down and licking a long stripe up your soaked pussy, swirling around your clit and making your hips buck up uncontrollably. He quickly braces a forearm over your twitching body, holding you still with his strength while he eats your pretty cunt.
“So fucking wet for me, gorgeous,” he mutters between your thighs, the vibrations feeling like shockwaves up your spine. “So pretty, baby, could’ve been eating this pretty cunt since college.”
You can barely form a sentence, only able to utter out whines of Matt, Matt Matt, between desperate moans as he licks into you. You can feel him grinning into your cunt, knowing he’s driving you fucking crazy, before he’s drawing up to capture your throbbing clit into his mouth and sucks. He brings his free hand up to sink a thick finger into your needy entrance, crooking it up and pressing into a spot inside that makes white creep into the edges of your vision. He just sucks and sucks, swirling his tongue around our achy clit and playing with you like a toy.
Your orgasm hits you like a freight train, unexpected and brutal, and you would have thrashed off the desk if it weren’t for Matt’s strong arms holding you steady. He carries you through it, licking at you softly while he keeps his finger inside, giving your pussy something to clutch onto. As your hips finally stop twitching, Matt rises, leaning over you again, and you can’t help but tug at his tie again, dragging his mouth to yours, uncaring of the taste of your pussy covering his lips.
“Please fuck me, Matty, oh god, please. Need you in me, baby,” you whine, and you can’t find it in yourself to be embarrassed at how needy you sound. Matt groans, sounding just as desperate as he licks into your mouth. He takes his hands from your body to reach down, undoing his belt and slacks just enough to tug his aching cock out. He’s so hard it’s nearly painful, the head sticky and red and throbbing with the need to fuck you. To claim you.
You wrap your arms over his back, tucking your head into the crook of his neck as he sinks into your sensitive pussy. As he finally bottoms out, you lean back to look at him, at his big eyes staring just off your face, his mouth slightly agape.
“I thought about this, y’know,” you whisper, your nails digging into his back as he presses just a bit deeper inside. “Every time I brought you guys lunch, I-” you moan softly as Matt thrusts, hard and so fucking deep you swear you swear you can feel him in your guts. “I thought about you, fucking me on this desk, in-in this fucking suit, god, Matt.”
“Shit, baby,” he grunts, rocking into you so hard the desk rattles beneath you. You can barely pay attention to it, not when the tip of Matt’s thick cock is grinding into the spot inside you that makes you scream, your nails digging into the soft fabric covering his back. “I thought about you too, god, you have no idea, sweetheart.” You can only whine in response as he continues, “You’d bring us all lunch, wearing your little uniform, fuck, with that pretty skirt and those heels.”
Matt’s hands tighten over your hips, forcing you to meet him thrust for thrust, and it’s so fucking good. You can’t manage to answer him through your desperate whines of his name and choked moans as his thick cock stretches you out for him, but Matt’s still talking. You don’t know if he can stop.
“I could hear your thighs brushing together under that tight fucking skirt, your heels clicking up the hall, and all I could think about was ruining you. Ripping that skirt off you and making you beg for my cock,” he grunts, driving desperately into your soaked pussy. Your head is swimming, drowning in Matt’s words, his scent, his cock.
“Now I can, baby,” he grunts, voice breaking on a choked moan. “I can fuck you just how I’ve wanted, make this pretty pussy soak my cock. Can wake up to you in my bed, fuck you whenever I want, whenever you want, baby, fuck I’m yours. You hear me, angel? I’m yours.” Matt can feel your pussy fluttering desperately around his cock, and snakes a hand between your bodies to press a thumb over your clit. 
He leans over you, his tie loose and dangling over your face as he growls, “and you’re mine. Mine.”
And you’re gone, pussy tightening like a vice around Matt’s thick cock, screaming his name. Little tears escape your eyes, dripping down your cheeks as Matt groans your name in return, hips stuttering into yours and flooding your overwhelmed pussy with his cum. You can hear him, just barely, through the roar of blood in your ears as he whispers, “So good, baby, so perfect. Love you so much, so much, you have no idea. I love you, loved you for so fucking long, angel.”
You bring your hands up to tangle your fingers into his soft hair, bringing him to your lips, whispering a soft “I love you so much, Matty,” in return before meeting him in a soft kiss. His smile against your mouth is blinding, endlessly joyful, and slightly delirious.
He’s still buried inside you a few minutes later, when you finally whisper, “I’m not sure this is what Foggy had in mind when he sent me over here.”
“If this is what Foggy had in mind, I might have to send him a fruit basket, or buy him a round,” Matt chuckles, and you smack him lightly on the shoulder before you’re laughing too. Matt smiles, unable to believe that you’re his, before he cuts your giggling off with a loving kiss.
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topguncortez · 4 months
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Are You With Me | | Chapter 3
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synopsis: Jake and Y/N fight over the hospital bill and whether its a good idea to keep the kids on Jake's insurance or night. Jake still has issues with Miles. Ella makes a decision in the course of her treatment.
word count: 2.1k
warnings: medical inaccuracies, divorce, fighting, cursing, childhood cancer, mentions of childhood death
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Jake had made a joke once that Eli was the cheapest baby they had. Said joke had earned him a glare that was fierce enough to send a shiver down his spine. Y/N had mastered the “mom eye” after having two kids.
But, even though Jake’s joke was done in poor timing, he was right. Having a baby, although not planned one bit, at home had saved them quite a bit of money. Jake had always found it comical that he was the best of the best. The 1% of the 1% and had some of the worst health care coverage in the whole United States.
“I feel like I need to take a loan out to pay these,” Jake rubbed his forehead, slipping his glasses off his face.
It was one of the rare moments that Jake and Y/N were both at the house. Y/N spent the day with Ella while Jake was at work and Alex was at school. Between Penny and Y/N’s mother Clara, they watched Eli for a couple of hours. Jake would then come to the hospital at night, staying with Ella while Y/N went home and made dinner and got the boys to bed. The Daggers had created a weekend schedule, each of them taking a saturday or sunday to stay with Ella so Jake and Y/N could both go home and recharge.
Though being at home was more stressful than watching their four year old getting pumped with toxins.
“Is that the bill?” Y/N asked as she walked into the kitchen after putting the boys down. She filled the tea kettle and set it on the burner, before pouring Jake a drink and taking it to him
“The first one, yeah,” Jake wiped a hand down his face, “Thanks,” He mumbled taking the rocks glass from her, “The ER visit cost thirty-three hundred dollars and insurance is only covering three hundred of it. The estimated total cost of care is around sixty-one thousand dollars.”
“Well,” Y/N swallowed, “I can always put Ella on my insurance. I get good-”
“No,” Jake sneered, “We agreed when we… we agreed when we divorced I would put the kids on my insurance plan because it’s cheaper.”
“Yes, but if this means compromising Ella’s care-“
“It’s not compromising anything!” Jake snapped causing Y/N to jump a bit in her seat. He scrubbed a hand down his face, “You got the kids and the house and everything else in the divorce. Let me help do this.”
Y/N nodded her head, “Fine,” She sighed, “We still have the rainy day fund.”
“Still not even going to make a dent in the payments,” Jake leaned back in his chair, “I’m tired of talking about this. How was Ella today?”
“Same as always,” Y/N shrugged, “Was fine in the morning before chemo, napped all afternoon and then threw up everything she ate. Her hair is becoming more of an issue for her… it’s becoming more noticeable.”
Ella’s hair had started to fall out as the weeks of chemo continued on. Jake and Y/N didn’t have the heart to shave it or cut it before Ella started therapy, wanting her to have the ability to make that decision for herself. But as the treatments went on, Ella’s confidence began to fade with each clump of hair that fell.
“Maybe we should just shave it,” Jake suggested as the tea kettle rang.
Y/N poured herself a mug, “No. She’s already losing so much autonomy over her own body. She should be the one who decides on her hair.”
“I hate to see her like that.”
“We all do,” Y/N took a sip of her tea, “But she was happy that Rooster and Dragon got to stay with her. Dragon mentioned something about watching Dateline.”
Jake chuckled, “Going to teach our four year old how to commit murder and get away with it.”
“She’s been stealing cookies and getting things she wants outta you since she was born.”
Jake couldn’t help it, he was a sucker for those big green eyes.
Silence fell over the two of them. It was moments like these where things almost felt normal between Jake and Y/N. Like the past two years had been a fever dream. That they had never spent a day apart. But then reality settled back in, and the awkwardness filled the air.
“I’m going to bed,” Y/N said, clearing her throat, “I put clean towels back in the guest room.”
“Thank you,” Jake nodded his head, “Goodnight, Y/N.”
“Night, Jake.”
— — —
When Ella was born, she had a full head of dark curly hair. Y/N knew that she was going to have hair from all the heartburn she had experienced through the whole nine months. In fact, that was the first thing the doctor had called out in the middle of delivering the Seresin girl.
“oh gosh! she’s got a full head of hair!”
Y/N had always dreamed of having a little girl with gorgeous long hair, and she had been lucky to get just that. She couldn’t wait until Ella was old enough to sit up and her hair long enough that she could braid it and style it. Ella always had perfectly done hair when Y/N dropped her off for daycare. Ella liked to show off her matching bows or the intricate braid that her mother did to her classmates and teacher.
Miles had told them one of the most common side effects of chemotherapy was the loss of hair. Y/N thought maybe, just maybe, Ella wouldn’t lose her hair. They had gotten through the first week of treatment without any hair loss. But then week two rolled around, and it was the worst week of Ella Seresin’s life.
“Mommy! My hair!” Ella cried as she stood fresh out of the shower, with a clump of hair in her hands. Y/N did all she could to try and soothe her child as she pulled on the ends of her hair, more stands coming out.
“I know, baby,” Y/N fought back tears, “I know. It’ll be okay.”
For weeks, Y/N and Jake watched as Ella’s hair grew thinner and thinner. They switched from using a brush to using a wide tooth comb, hoping to save some of the frail strands of hair on her head. Ella knew that most kids on the floor didn’t have hair or wore fake hair. She knew that eventually, she would look like them.
“Do you want strawberry or cherry jello for lunch?” Y/N asked as she looked over the hospitals menu choices for today. Y/N wasn’t sure if it was because of stress but the hospital food wasn’t actually that bad. Plus, Val had kept Ella’s room stacked with snacks.
“Mommy,” Ella said.
“Yes, baby?” Y/N asked, putting the menu down and looking at her daughter, “What’s up, buttercup?”
“I want to cut my hair.”
“What?” Y/N was taken aback by her daughter’s words. Ella was wise beyond her years but this shocked Y/N to hear.
“I want to cut my hair. It keeps falling,” Ella said, touching her thinning hair.
Y/N nodded her head, “Of course, baby. We’ll do it tonight, when dad gets here. That sounds okay?” Ella nodded her head, a bright smile on her face, “Now, how about that jello.”
A couple of hours later, Jake was walking down the familiar bright colored walls of the children’s cancer ward. He always found it ironic that such a dark place was painted so brightly. Ella had only been there two months and already she had new neighbors on either side of her room. The cries of the parents haunted Jake at night and the images of little bodies being moved with sheets over their heads was enough to bring Jake to a panic. However, every time Jake walked closer to Ella’s door he was met with the beautiful sound of laughter. 
A smile graced Jake’s lips as he heard Ella’s laugh and that familiar snort that always made her laugh harder. But the moment he opened the door, his smile dropped. 
“Doctor Miles.” 
“Daddy!” Ella cheered and sat up in her bed, reaching out for her father. 
Jake walked over to her, greeting her with a hug and kissing her forehead, “How are you, bug?” 
“I’m good,” Ella nodded her head, laying back in her bed, “Doctor Miles is playing Bluey with me.” 
“I see that,” Jake looked over at Miles who was standing in the corner of the room now, “Where is Mommy?” 
“Sent her for a snack,” Miles answered, “She’s looking like the walking dead.” 
“Can we refrain from making death jokes?” Miles held back from rolling his eyes, “I’m here now, so you can go.” 
“I said I would wait here with Ella until-” 
“I’m her father and I say-” 
“You say nothing,” Y/N said, appearing in the doorway, “Thank you, Miles.” 
Miles nodded his head, “No problem, Y/N. I’ll see you tomorrow, Ella, good job today.” He held his hand out for the little girl to give him a high five. 
Y/N waited a moment until Miles was out of the room before looking at Jake, “Really?” 
Jake just shrugged, “I had it under control.” 
“I’m sure,” Y/N sighed, walking over to Ella’s bed. The little girl curled up next to her mother almost instantly, “Do you want to tell your daddy what you want to do today?” Ella nodded her head and then looked at Jake. 
“I want to cut my hair.” 
Jake’s eyes widened as he looked from Ella to Y/N, “You do?” Ella nodded her head again. 
“The nurses brought some clippers and stuff earlier. I-I’ve never cut anyone’s hair so I-”
“I got it,” Jake answered, “I was cuttin’ boys’ hair in the bay at boot camp.” 
 “Okay,” Y/N said, feeling the familiar burn of tears in her eyes, “You ready, Elles?” 
“Yes!” Ella said, a bright smile on her face. 
Both Y/N and Jake walked with Ella to the bathroom where a nurse had brung in clippers, scissors, a razor, shaving cream and a step stool. Ella stepped up on the stool, looking at herself in the mirror that was covered with pink and purple flowers. Y/N leaned against the doorway, watching as Jake got everything set up, occasionally making funny faces in the mirror to make Ella laugh. 
“Gonna start now, are you sure this is what you want?” Jake asked his daughter. Ella nodded her head, “Okay. Here we go.” Both Y/N and Jake took a deep breath as he grabbed a lock of Ella’s hair and lifted the scissors. The sound of the shears closing together made the loudest sound Y/N had ever heard as a lock of brown went tumbling down to the ground. 
“You cut it!” Ella gasped. Jake’s heart pounded in his chest, then it relaxed as her giggles filled the room, “Do it again!” 
Jake looked at his wife through the mirror, seeing her red eyes but the smallest smile on her face, “Let’s keep going.” 
After every snip of the scissors, Ella giggled which made the whole situation somewhat better. Eventually Jake got to the point where he had to use the clippers. He gently moved them over her head, watching as the final pieces of hair fell from her head. 
“What do you think?” Jake asked, as he set the razor down in the sink. It was quiet for a moment as Ella looked herself over in the mirror. 
“My head is cold,” She said. 
Y/N chuckled as she stepped into the bathroom, walking up behind her daughter, “We’ll get you a hat or two or-” 
“Three!” Ella held up three fingers. Ella turned to face her mom, “Momma, don’t cry.” 
“I’m sorry, baby,” Y/N said, as Ella wiped a finger away from her cheek, “How about we take a shower and then watch a disney movie?” 
“Princess and The Frog! Daddy! Will you stay?” 
Y/N looked at Jake, who was cleaning up the hair around the bathroom, “Yeah. Of course. Let me finish cleaning this up, and I'll sneak down to the nurses lounge to make popcorn.” 
“Thank you,” Y/N said, sincerity in her voice, “Let’s get cleaned up, Elles.” 
A strange feeling settled over Jake’s chest as he watched his wife and daughter. A strange feeling that maybe, just maybe. . . things will be alright.
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tiddygame · 2 months
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i’ve stared at this for so long that i now hate it and think ive lost all concept of how to write so take this and get it out of my google docs
the introduction is rough and the medical depictions (and accuracy/realism) could use some (a lot of) work but whatever! here it is, my vague yet still oddly specific idea of how the face reveal would go in @myriadblvck ’s streamer au:
tw: description of a panic attack? i think?
[this takes place post first irl meet but before they’re officially together]
imagine ghost has a glasgow smile but on one side they carved a little too deep and left some nerve damage. time and surgery helped, after which he could eat unimpeded and talk without a lisp, but there's still some facial nerve damage and/or skin contractures from scarring, specifically around the corner of his mouth.
now, everytime he smiles, be it shit eating grin or a full genuine joy filled smile that not even grumpy mcgrumperson could hold off, it always looks wrong because one corner doesn't raise fully like the other.
everything else is fine, there isn’t any facial paralysis, he just smiles… wrong. especially since only one eye properly squints when he smiles, giving him the look of someone who got stuck mid wink.
if he wants to look “normal” (or as normal as he could get it) he has to manually squint his other eye. still, it always felt weird; you don't realize how much those muscles affect the rest of your face until they're gone.
it's why he learned to always wear the mask.
when his expression is neutral, you don’t really notice it. if you can see his mouth when he talks however, it’s obvious that there’s something wrong. he wouldn’t say he’s necessarily ashamed of the scars and damage itself, but it’s the stares that are the worst. before he started hiding behind it, people would openly gawk or even glare at him as if he was some ne’er-do-well gang member that got what was coming to him.
he still remembers the cosmetic surgeon that had been talking to him about fixing the contractures— the whole appointment was a fucking nightmare. the cuts had healed nicely enough especially considering how bad it could have been; he was lucky to only need a little cosmetic help. the only reason he was there was so he could fucking eat food without struggling to open his mouth.
the doctor spent god knows how long breaking down everything wrong with his face like he was a fucking car mechanic lying about how dirty your filter is. the guy constantly mentioned that while he was under, they could also fix his jawline, do a rhinoplasty, trying to break him down to agree to more work.
he was already fuming my the time the doc brought up how kids would react. asking ghost if he wanted to scare children since “you cant expect the little youngins that are still learning about the world to not get scared by something scary,” and that “even some adults would cringe at the scarring.”
what stuck out most was the condescending smile he had when he said it. as if he was pointing out the obvious and ghost was being stupid and shortsighted by not agreeing.
he declined everything except what was medically necessary. the procedure went fine and after an aggravatingly long recovery period, he could eat solid foods again without issue. but the comments still stuck with him.
…okay, maybe he’s a little ashamed.
scaring kids with your face doesn’t feel good and being reminded of everything you’ve lost when you try to smile can really fuck you up in a way words fail to describe.
so yeah, he hates it. he’s gotten used to the mask, both skull clad balaclava and simple medical mask, being a permanent layer of armor. even now that he’s a bit more comfortable in his own skin it still feels wrong to pull it off.
when he gets close to soap, it still feels like a layer of vulnerability that he’ll never be prepared for.
the first time he let soap see his face, there hadn’t been any grandiose build up, no extravagant planning.
simon had arrived just a few hours earlier. he hated commercial flights with a burning passion but it was always worth it to see johnny.
with soaps twin out of town for the week, he had decided to take leave to spend time with his friend, a friend that he most certainly did NOT have a crush on (a disclaimer roach and gaz heard everytime they started snickering over ghost taking leave.)
johnny had cooked something nice and simple for dinner, saying that simon had spent too long with MREs and deserved real food (ghost only agreed if he was the one washing the dishes, soap had laughed and told him he's not so kind as to let him off the hook for chores).
when they ate, it was always in the living room with johnny taking care to always stay angled away from simon, never trying to catch a glimpse, regardless of how much he wanted to see what was under the mask. the obvious gesture of kindness and respect for his boundaries always left him feeling all weird and fuzzy inside. but, then again, johnny seemed pretty good at triggering that feeling in general.
their finished plates were on the coffee table and johnny was watching whatever dumb movie he had put on. he was pretty sure the man spent more time talking over it and making fun of everything than he did actually watching it (it was simon’s favorite way to watch a movie.)
ghost however, was watching soap. thinking.
in the end, it was an impulsive decision made after a strong three seconds of consideration.
“you uhm— you can look by the way,” ghost stared at the can of soda in his hands, immediately regretting the words.
“what?” soap didn’t fully turn, just shifted slightly to hear him better. a simple gesture to show he was listening without turning to face him. it normally made simon happy to see that johnny was more than willing to accommodate for his boundaries. now though it made him feel stupid for robbing johnny of a normal face to face conversation, a normal human interaction, just over his idiotic insecurities.
“my face, you—,” he felt his heart block his airway and tried clearing his throat before continuing, “you can look if you want,” christ he wanted the ground to swallow him whole. why was he getting so fucked up over this?
“are you sure?” he hadn’t turned yet, but ghost could see his pensive expression from here. this should be nothing. realistically, he knew johnny seeing his scars wouldn’t suddenly make him hate him… right?
“yes.”
but it was more than the fear of hatred, wasn’t it? he was scared that johnny would see him. see more than just the scars, see all of the ugly idiosyncrasies and insecurities laid bare. afraid that johnny would see the truth of how unlovable he was.
jesus he was getting so fucking worked up and dramatic over nothing.
ghost didn’t look up. he made an effort to not focus on his peripheral vision. he heard soap turn, heard the intake of breath. the silence was loud only for a second. then, deafening white noise surrounded him, inescapable, suffocating.
fuck.
he didn’t regret giving permission but god did he regret everything else; the stupid scars, the stupid nerve damage, the stupid way he had managed to fall for someone so fucking good like johnny while he was unequivocally unworthy of his love.
stop being so fucking dramatic. you are not together, never have been and never will be. reality was blatant in front of him but it didn’t stop his heart from foolishly hoping.
he heard soap stand and walk closer. saw from where he was still staring a hole in the can his feet step in front of his. saw johnny’s hands raise. he took a deep breath in, closed his eyes, and with a great deal of effort didn’t flinch when soaps fingers grazed his cheek.
both of his hands came up to cup his face, holding him and ever so slightly tilting his face up, giving him the chance to pull away. he didn’t. he may be a coward but he wasn’t backing down.
ghost eventually opened his eyes to see soap staring at him with wide eyes. he looked away, staring off to some point on the right. he hated not knowing what soap was thinking.
they stayed there for a while before soap broke the silence, muttering, “i fuckin knew you had freckles.”
it was stupid but it shocked a laugh out of ghost. he meant to drop his head, embarrassed that something so dumb made him laugh, but accidentally just pushed himself further into soaps hands making him blush.
he looked up and saw soap staring even harder than before. the chuckle died in his chest.
“do that again.”
ghost just gave him a confused look.
“smile.”
such a simple request, a one word sentence, but it set his face ablaze. his breath caught in his throat, somewhere around where his heart was still trying to choke him.
…he hadn’t thought it was that bad but soaps reaction indicated otherwise. fuck. was his it that awful? he wanted the ground to swallow him whole. this was stupid. he was stupid.
“simon,” of course, one word from johnny and it felt like he could breathe again.
“please?”
fucking goddamn soap and his stupid fucking puppy dog eyes and the way he has ghost wrapped around his fucking finger without even realizing.
ghost smiled. there was no real mirth, more a grimace than anything else. he just wanted to get this over with.
soap was still staring at him, his thumbs tracing his lips, following scars, drawing imaginary lines between freckles… if he wasn't so terrified it might have felt nice.
“Christ,” ghosts heart cracked more, “you weren't lying when you said you were beautiful.”
ghost huffed a laugh and went back to staring off to the right, the fake smile dropping. of course soap would try to lighten the mood with a joke.
his panic fled as quickly as it had consumed him, now just left sitting in soap's living room, face still cradled in caring hands, resigned to his mistakes.
he felt so tired and johnny's hands felt so inviting.
“i wasn't joking,” soap looked…upset? angry? wait— fuck, what’d he do?
ghost stared back at soap, confused and tired. soaps nails felt the grooves of the scar, catching where the skin was raised and lowered.
“you don't have to lie, soap. im a grown man. I'm not fragile. you don't need to coddle me,” ghost said it like it was a joke, hoping soap would laugh along and that this would all just blow over. that tomorrow morning they could forget this ever happened.
“are you calling me a liar?” soap’s brow furrowed. great. instead, he had managed to make everything worse and piss off soap as well.
ghost took in a deep breath, giving himself another shot at calming things down, “no, I'm not. I think you're lying, but you're not a liar,” he stood and stepped to the side, grabbing their dirty plates and walking them to the kitchen sink, “you just don't want to upset me, it's fine. I get it. you're a nice person but you don't have to lie to spare my feelings.”
“I am not fucking lying!” as per usual, all ghost had managed to do was make things worse. there’s a reason he had decided to stick to the battlefield and give up on domesticity.
“well alright then. agree to disagree,” he turned the kitchen tap and started rinsing the dishes, waiting for the water to heat up. just walk away. end it there. let us forget about this stupid blunder and move on. please just leave it. please, please, please—
“no.”
the force behind it damn near made ghost drop the plate he was holding. he managed to set it in the sink carefully and turned to face soap, who was now in the kitchen as well.
“i— I'm not just gonna fucking— simon,” soap took in a deeper breath and went to continue but ghost was faster.
“johnny,” he interrupted, walking forward with his hands up in a gesture of surrender, approaching slowly.
one last chance to not fuck everything up.
“the fact is they're called deformities for a reason. they're not cute. they're not pretty. they're your body’s way of healing what it can and protecting what it can't. it's not meant to look nice, it's just—”
“bullshit they’re not pretty! says fucking who?” the genuine distress in soap’s voice and force behind his words caught him off guard. “simon—”
he huffed and ran his fingers through his hair roughly, pulling slightly at the strands. christ, ghost needs to shut the fuck up. every single time he speaks he just upsets soap more and more.
he needs to retake his hostage negotiations courses. clearly he has forgotten everything about how to diffuse a situation.
johnny takes another second to breathe and collect his thoughts before he speaks.
“simon. I know that— that ‘this’ isn't something that's going to fix itself overnight and I don't expect it to. but, ‘the fact is,’ I think you're pretty.”
ghost opens his mouth to disagree but johnny doesn’t let him.
“no no,” johnny put his hand over simon’s mouth, shocking him into silence. he blinks twice, stupefied.
“i think— no. I know you're pretty. cute even. beautiful is a given but obviously worth mentioning.”
his hand moved to cup simon’s cheek. ghost grabbed his wrist but didn’t stop him, wether it was a warning or encouragement he himself didn’t know.
johnny continued, unperturbed, “you disagreeing doesn't change that, right?”
there was a pause and simon realized he wanted an answer.
“johnny-”
“ah ah!” his hand moved back to cover his mouth, grabbing his face and shaking his head back and forth, over accentuating his words, “you disagreeing doesn't change that, right? yes or no.”
he stopped shaking him and moved his hand back to simon’s cheek. simon sighed, defeated, “yes. you are right.”
johnny looked smug, “good. and what do you say when i give you a compliment you don’t agree with?”
simon sputtered, “wha— i don't fucking know—”
“nothing! you don’t say anything!” soap looked way too proud of himself and he continued, “or thank you if you feel so inclined.”
“that was a trick question,” simon replied eventually.
johnny thumbed over his scars once more, again tracing them, “sure it was. now go take a shower.”
he patted his cheek twice and walked to the hallway.
“wait,” johnny probably shook the few remaining brain cells out of his head. “this whole conversation ends with you telling me that I stink?”
“yes. rancid,” johnny opened the door to the linen closet. simon was still in the kitchen. the tap was still running.
“no dipshit, do you not remember telling me that commercial planes makes you feel gross?” johnny threw a towel at him, which he caught just in time for johnny to hit him with a bath rag.
ghost had mentioned that… ages ago, he thinks. on facetime with each other, discussing the merits of bathrooms on public transport. he had said that enclosed, crowded spaces like commercial planes or buses made him feel, well, gross. how—or why—did he remember that?
“but… I’m supposed to wash the dishes?” a weak argument against the stubbornness he was faced with but simon had officially lost track of his mind and this conversation.
johnny shot him a weird look as he walked back towards the kitchen sink. simon still hadn’t moved.
“did you think i was being serious earlier?”
“yes???” he felt like he had been given a lobotomy.
johnny decided to take pity on him and explained in a soft voice that felt out of place, “i was being sarcastic. i’m not going to make you wash the dishes, simon.”
“but that was the agreement: you cook and i wash the dishes.”
johnny laughed as if he remembered something funny, “yeah, i lied.”
simon still stood there, trying to figure out if he had a stroke. johnny had been angry, completely pissed at him, but now was letting him off the hook and calling him pretty? what the fuck is happening?
johnny turned him and pushed him towards the hallway. simon could have resisted but his resolve always seems to crumble around johnny mactavish.
“now go shower, you beautiful bastard,” soap grabbed one of the plates out of the sink and started washing it with water that had probably heated ages ago.
ghost walked towards the bathroom, feeling like he was on autopilot, limbs disconnected from his brain. his cheek still felt… odd? weird? tingly?
it felt something from where johnny had grabbed it. ghost thinks… he thinks he likes the feeling, whatever it is.
he needs to sleep.
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