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technowoah · 3 years

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THESEUS - a dsmp story ( DreamSMP x Queen!Reader)

CHAPTER FIVE : AND I REALIZE THREE FUNDAMENTAL TRUTHS AT THE EXACT SAME TIME.

Chapter Summary: You had gotten what you wanted, but at what cost? Nightmares ensue, and Dream’s true colors begin to show.

pairing: c!wilbur x queen!reader

an// IM BACK!! hopefully yall like this chaper cause this is the last one that I wrote in the past, Im writing chapter 6 rn so it might take a while. Also sorry for not posting requests I really wanted to get this chapter out there

⚠︎ swearing, dsmp spoliers(?), angst, arguing, smoking, explosions, gaslighting(?), not proofread.

Series Masterlist

"Good job you two! This is all yours now.”

Dream had led you and Eret back to the castle, all of them still battered and bruised from the war they recently had. You had already taken off your armor and now you were wearing underneath your L'Manburg outfit that was torn and burnt showing some of your skin which was also burnt or cut. You had noticed on the way to the castle that Dream had kept on looking at the outfit that Eret and you had on with disgust, like a taunt.

You could finally relax in the huge castle that you apparently deserved because you and Eret had taken the first lives of the citizens of L'Manburg. In your heart you knew that L'Manburg was still a country. They all have two more lives and they will build the country up again with those two lives. You sighed then kept walking into the throne room. you looked at the two big thrones that sat next to each other. One for a king and one for a queen.

"Why are you standing there? Sit down! Relax!" Dream patted one of the thrones.

You and Eret had sat down on the thrones next to each other looking around the huge throne room and Dream smiling right in front of them. Once you both sat down you tried to sit up straight, but you wanted to slump down into the comfy, plush, velvet and gold chair. The two of them sat on velvet and gold thrones while in burnt and torn L'Manburg uniforms. It was a sight to see, and if someone didn't know the context of what just happened, this scene would've made sense to them.

"I'm happy you did this. You deserve all of this." Dream said while walking along the marble floor.

"It's beautiful, but I'm exhausted." You let your head fall to the side. You sighed wanting Dream to leave so you could finally get some rest.

"I bet."

"Eret are you okay?" You spoke up after Dream.

Eret had a look that you couldn't make out. He just stared off into space in his own mind. He shook his head after you called for him again.

"Yeah, yeah I am fine. I'm just thinking." Eret quickly responded.

"What are you thinking about?" Dream said in a monotone voice.

"If we did the right thing." Eret sighed.

You slowly nodded because you were thinking the exact same thing. They were traitors, you had built somewhat of a connection with those people you helped kill. And now what? you're living in a huge castle and apparently you "Shouldn't be feeling this way", Dream claimed.

"You two are overreacting. They are fine." Dream said bluntly while staring at them with a straight face.

That was a huge lie, their lives were taken today. They're not just “fine”.

"You two were never a part of that place anyways. This is your home! Why would you need to wear those hideous colors? They look bad on you, it's unflattering. There is no need to go back." Dream explained.

You hang your head not knowing what to say to the man, there wasn’t really anything to say but you spoke up hoping the words will come to you.

"I don't-"

"You don't have to say anything, it's okay. You're safe now. Did you get hurt?" Dream asked.

The bruises and scars said differently.

"Remember when I said that?" Dream pushed the question.

You rubbed a burn mark on your wrist and laughed a bit. "No! Actually I don't. We're safe now, but that doesn't mean we aren't hurt." You chuckled in disbelief.

"Well maybe if you listened to me you wouldn't be so anxious. If you listened you wouldn't have been so hesitant. You're safe." Dream said sternly.

"Maybe you're tired, Dream. We're all tired. Shall we go to bed?" Eret stood up and held out his hand to help you up from your seat.

You accepted his hand and started to follow Eret through the huge castle making your way through the huge, high ceiling halls. The three walked towards the king's and queen's room in the castle, Dream kept a slower pace and walked behind the two wanting to get one more word in before leaving the castle.

"If you two are ever in doubt just remember that you are on the right side of history." Dream said then turned around to leave the two alone.

You both stopped and turned around to see Dream’s back facing the both of you as he walked away. You and Eret eventually made it to your new bedrooms. There was a big door which held a huge room made for the both of them to sleep in and two separate rooms next to the bigger door which were made for one person. Eret and you stood in front of the bigger door staring at the intricate designs on the door not speaking to each other.

"So?" Eret laughed.

"So!" You exclaimed while chuckling.

"Are you okay sleeping in that huge room tonight?" Eret asked.

"I'm not totally comfortable with that, but it would be weird if we slept in the same bed. Don't get me wrong! You're a great friend, but-"

"Y/N/N stop! I'm okay with that too. I wasn't looking to sleep in the same bed. Yes we're married, but we're just staying friends, hey we might get a divorce later." Eret explained.

"If I do, we won't be king and queen anymore." You said softly to your husband.

"Is that what you want? To be "queen"?" Eret asked while putting air quotes around the word queen.

You paused for a moment then answered his question.

"I don't know where I'm supposed to be, Eret." You looked up at him sadly and he pulled you in for a hug. It took you everything you had to not cry into the L'Manburg uniform Eret was wearing. Today drained you mentally and physically, your hands were raw from shooting arrows, you had burn marks on your skin and your feet hurt from running through the kingdom. You weren’t sure about where you would go, because this didn't feel like your home.

"Let's go to bed and we'll talk in the morning. Rest on it because I'll happily divorce you so you can find your place in this huge kingdom." Eret laughed and let you out of his arms.

You chuckled and then let him go walking into what was supposed to be the queen's room and right next to it was the king's room which they both walked in after saying goodnight and closing their doors finally having time to themselves after a long day.

You finally took off the L'Manburg uniform and laid it on a velvet chair in the corner of the huge room. You stared at the uniform before going to the nearest closet and picking out something to wear for that night. The queen's room was basically the huge couple's room that you found before, but just with a smaller bed. There were still trinkets, jewelry and even clothes in the closet. you took a nightgown out of the closet and sat on the plush bed. You ended up laying down staring at the high ceiling thinking of the predicament Eret's question brought.

You finally retired for the night and crawled into bed and got under the soft covers. The window was open so a soft cool breeze was blowing through the room letting the curtains flow with the breeze. If you left you wouldn't have anywhere to go except back to L'Manburg, they would never let you back even if you tried. They probably hated your guts by now, so maybe divorcing wasn't a good idea. You had a set home here, you had food, clothes, and you weren't under attack every minute. you didn't have to watch your back for any enemies.

Your mind slowed down as you finally lulled yourself into a deep sleep forgetting the troubles in your mind for only a moment.

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The sunset fell over the horizon making it a gold, red color. It was beautiful. The trees were illuminated and the lakes had a certain glow to them. you could see mobs began to crawl out of the ground and caves, but you was safe up here.

You looked down and saw the familiar obsidian walls. It seemed like a faint memory, but in reality the walls were real. It was like you could feel the stone underneath your feet at this moment. you could see inside L'Manburg.

you saw Tubbo and Tommy laying in the grass talking to one another. you saw Fundy sleeping in the grass next to them. There were two new faces you had never seen before. It was a woman with short pink hair and another man with a shaved head. It might've been your mind putting people in your dreams to fill space. Then you saw Eret sitting by a small river letting his bare feet flow in the water. It was a peaceful scene.

"Beautiful sunset isn't it?" A voice showed up beside you.

It was Wilbur. He had his uniform on, it was clean like the war didn't even happen.

"It is really beautiful." You agreed watching the sun continue to lower over the trees.

"You know everything the sun touches is yours? It's all of ours. It just so happens that you can see the sunset and sunrise from L'Manburg. You can do anything as long as you see the sun rise and fall." Wilbur said, keeping his gaze soft at the sunset.

You hummed but stayed quiet admiring his words and the sunset.

"Let me tell you what I wish I'd known when I was young and dreamed of glory. You have no control who lives, who dies, who tells your story. After you took one of my lives away I understand now. You can't control other people and their motivations."

You hang your head in disappointment, but then Wilbur continued.

"But I know that we can win. I know that greatness lies in you, but remember from here on in that history has its eyes on you. History will forever have its eyes on you no matter what you do." Wilbur looked into your eyes as the sun set on the two of them the stars began to shine.

The light brown eyes Wilbur had turned darker because of the sunlight being gone. You looked out back at the mobs in the forest and the huge towers in the sky made the kingdoms members. you turned around and looked into L'Manburg. Or what was considered L'Manburg.

There was no one there anymore, instead of people there were huge amounts of TNT that filled the walls behind them. you could hear faint voices around them, people that you didn't know. It sounded like chaos. you whipped your head around to Wilbur who was dressed in a brown tattered trench coat, brown pants, and a white shirt instead of the L'Manburg uniform.

He had a cigarette in his mouth and matches in his hands. He smirked at you as the voices around you got louder and your head sounded like you were in the middle of a tornado. your head was buzzing as your eyes couldn't focus on Wilbur in front of you. It felt like these moments were happening right in front of your all at one time.

"You want to be a hero Tommy?"

"You know if I die, this country goes down with me."

"if respect is the only thing protecting you from a knife in the back, then respect is nothing, right?"

"Kill me, Phil. Phil, kill me, Phil kill me! Phil, stab me with the sword, murder me now, kill me! Look-"

"You know Y/N" Wilbur started next to you. He lit a match and turned around to L'Manburg which was now filled with TNT.

"Somethings. Somethings were never meant to be." He threw the match into the huge pile of TNT and all in a second the obsidian underneath your feet disappeared as you fell into the explosion beneath you.

-------------------------

"Fuck! Where am I?!" You shot up from your sleeping position in a cold sweat.

You frantically felt around the bed trying to convince yourself that you were physically at the castle in your bed. You finally caught your breath and laid back down in your bed finding yourself staring at the ceiling again. Even with the window open blowing cool air into the room, your skin still felt hot. You ended up tossing the covers off of you and making your way towards the entrance of the kingdom to get some air.

That dream was so much stuff in it you couldn't comprehend all of it. It was like Wilbur was there as if he was talking to you directly and it wasn't a dream and it made you second guess yourself and think that it may have not been a dream. You finally made it outside and sat on one of the steps that led people up into the kingdom. you sighed and breathed in the fresh air and it immediately relaxed your body and mind. You were alive, you were here and sadly Wilbur wasn't there. You closed your eyes and felt the breeze around you until you were startled by a figure beside you.

"You're up late. I thought you said you were mentally tired." Dream chuckled sitting beside you.

"I had a bad dream." You sighed.

"Hey don't take my name in vain like that" Dream laughed trying to bring up your mood.

Dream sighed and stood back up when he didn't get a response from his companion.

"Come one, let's go. Let's get your mind off of the one bad dream." Dream held his hand out, gesturing to you to take it.

You took his hand and then released it letting him lead the way to wherever the wind may take them. The dream is currently still stuck in your head. The voices from different people confused you and made your head spin.

"You want to be a hero Tommy?" What did that mean? Was someone threatening Tommy? Will someone threaten Tommy? You grew to care for that kid.

Who said "If I die, this country goes down with me"? What country. L'Manburg?

"If respect is the only thing protecting you from a knife in the back, then respect is nothing, right?" That one stumped you the most. you didn't even know if this was being spoken to you or to someone else. All of them except for the Tommy one.

Were they all even dreams? The one that haunted your mind the most was the one where someone was telling a man named Phil to kill them. Were you there for that moment? Did Phil kill the person? Who was Phil? All these thoughts and questions plagued your mind so much that your feet mindlessly carried you wherever Dream led you to.

"Here we are." Dream led You on top of a hill, a tall enough hill to see the main attraction. The place you missed the most, L'Manburg.

Tears started to form in your eyes and you tried blinking them away. All the moments of that dream appeared in your brain, but even stronger. you never felt these emotions before. Maybe L'Manburg was your home all along. you missed seeing Tubbo, Tommy, Eret and Fundy doing their own thing while your and Wilbur had a deep talk inside the van. you had spent weeks with them growing too attached to them and then ended up becoming a traitor.

"That place. You never belonged there. You're too good for them." Dream started and you stayed quiet watching the stars begin to disappear.

"Do you trust me?" Dream asked.

You stayed quiet not having the answer he wanted to hear. He wanted to hear you say that you trusted him when in reality you couldn’t, you weren't fully there yet, not anymore.

"They lied to you. It's not your home." Dream continued on letting you listen and not talk.

"How did you know if someone said it was my home or not?" You asked, startled.

"I might've been keeping an eye on you. I wanted to make sure my flower was okay." Dream kept his gaze on L'Manburg.

"Stop calling me that." You sighed.

"I never started. This was the first time I said that. Who called you flower?" Dream suddenly got serious, staring at you.

you kept your sights on the obsidian walls, not sparing him a glance. The stars began to fade and the sun peeked over the horizon. As they stayed longer the sun rose over the walls of L'Manburg. You started to remember the words in the dream you had.

L'Manburg stands for independence. Independence. That word kept ringing through your head like a mantra until a few voices below the hill and near the walls alerted you.

"HEY! Hey Wilbur! Give me back my shit!" Tommy yelled as he stomped after the older man.

"Wilbur get Tommy to stop shouting and give him his swords back please!" Fundy yelled trailing behind the two.

"No not until he learns not to go start stabbing shit!" Wilbur yelled back at the other two.

You missed that. you missed the bickering and the nonsense they all shared. you were upset that Tommy still hadn't learned his lesson and you wished you were there beside them at that moment.

Dream spoke up giving you a look you couldn’t quite get. "You are never allowed to step inside those walls again.

"What gives you the right to tell me what and what not to do? Who does that make you? Who do you think-"

"YOU ARE NEVER ALLOWED TO GO IN THOSE WALLS!" Dream yelled getting dangerously close to you.

You continued to stare at those blue eyes as the bright sun rose over the dark walls of L’Manburg. you didn't say anything but descended down the mountain alone with the sounds of Tommy, Fundy, and Wilbur bickering in the background, wishing you were there and not next to the man next to you who was staring at you angrily.

"I know what’s good for you! I know what's good for this country! Just trust me Y/N!" Dream yelled starting an argument

"Would you calm down! You came here to be all quiet and now you're yelling at me. You might want to be quiet before Wilbur hears you. Or do you want me to get him myself?" You yelled back, getting furious.

"Oh you wish! He doesn't care for you as much as me, Sapnap and George do! They agree as well!"

"Don't put words into his mouth!" You accused

"Oh! So if he cares so fucking much he would've help save you. And do you know what would happen if he saved you?! You would've died! I saved you! You were in a perfect situation and all you had to do is not complain! You're always overreacting." Dream ended with a huff and rolled his eyes while turning away..

you were speechless at this point. Overwhelming emotions consumed you. you couldn't believe you were overreacting. Maybe Wilbur wasn't everything you needed. you were overreacting, you were being selfish too. Dream was right. Dream walked over to you pulling you in a hug with L'Manburg was still in your sights.

"I did everything because I love you. You're too precious for them, you're not for them. They don't deserve you, you deserve someone who wants the best for you. A flower that needs a home and I'm here to give it to you." Dream softly explained.

Your eyes kept tearing up at the words and different emotions flowing through you. The sights on L'Manburg make your memories and questions come back. Where did you belong? But more importantly who was telling the truth?

Taglist: @hi-imuwu @k-l-a-w-s

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bumbleklee · 3 years

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Could you make a fic based on the song Moondust By Jaymes Young? With Xiao or Zhongli? It’s fine if you decline, I enjoyed your Lonestar fic a lot! Also, thank you in advance if you do this! ^^

after this, i decided im a monster. this is so sad, like so so sad. i don't know if this is what you had in mind but since the song is basically about learning how to live/love without someone, i went down a death route. i also went w xiao. pls enjoy (and grab a tissue)

before reading: ANGST!!! you literally die and are a ghost the entire time. mentions of injury and blood as well as self-harm and suicidal thoughts. word count is around 2.1k (under cut for length)

I'm building this house, on the moon Like a lost, astronaut Lookin' at you, like a star From a place, the world forgot And there's nothing, that I can do Except bury my love for you

Death was quick.

You know instantly that you’re dead the second you open your eyes. You can still remember the feeling of the Fatui pyro agent slicing his knife across your throat and if you think about it enough, your neck tingles. You remember falling to your knees, being laughed at, and then you saw nothing.

Well, you saw blackness.

And then when you came to, you were standing in the middle of Liyue Harbor. The world seemed duller but it was real. No one paid any mind to you, so you assumed you were a ghost.

It’s nice to still be able to watch the sun rise high above your hometown.

There’s no panic, no rush to find out what’s going on, you don’t need to. Your hands travel to your throat and the horrific wound is gone. In fact, all of the scrapes and bruises and imperfections on your body were gone. Death brings solace, you humor.

Your peaceful moment was interrupted by two frantic voices. They catch the attention of everyone in the area, including you, and you spin around quickly.

Xiao.

“Break the contract, please, Zhongli-” His voice is frazzled, filled with a sadness the living can’t understand. “I can’t live without them.”

You looked down at your left hand, heart shattering at the absence of the jade ring. Right. You were going to marry Xiao later that year. Not anymore.

A hundred thousand memories of sweet kisses and long nights flooded into your mind. They caused you to hold your breath, too many emotions crashing through your tired form. You felt like crying but couldn’t (ghosts didn’t have tears, you guessed).

You’re standing right in front of the love of your life and he can’t see you.

Maybe it’s a good thing he can’t see you because Xiao already looked wrecked. His eyes were puffy and red and his hair was disheveled. Unhealed scratches wound his arms like ribbon. You had been with Xiao for years, through the good and the bad, and never once had you ever seen him in this state.

He’s pleading still and Zhongli has an indescribable expression on his face. “I can’t,” His voice is barely a whisper, “You know I can’t.”

Xiao wails, falling to his knees. Zhongli feels his pain, you know he does, yet he won’t put him out of misery. You watch as Zhongli bends down and lifts the adeptus into his arms, swiftly walking away from the crowd. You follow ensuite and Xiao’s eyes are hazy, staring through you over Zhongli’s shoulder.

“I’m right here.”

But he doesn’t hear you.

The brightness of the sun, will give me just enough To bury my love, in the Moondust I long to hear your voice, but still I make the choice To bury my love, in the moondust

You begin to follow Xiao around. Not that he goes anywhere, too heartbroken to move, but you keep watch of him like he once did for you.

He resorts to staying in Zhongli’s apartment. The consultant isn’t around most of the day and Xiao rarely leaves his bed. His tears stain the satin pillowcase and he curls upon himself. Sometimes you stand in the doorway and stare, other times you muster up enough courage to go and sit on the unoccupied side of the bed.

The first time you touch Xiao again is at night. He’s crying and without thinking, you wrap your body around his. His chest is pressed against yours and you press your lips to his shoulder.

It’s not warm anymore. In fact, it feels like nothing.

But still, you hold Xiao until he’s asleep. You don’t let go all night, opting to watch your beloved finally get some rest. You wonder if this is how it’s going to be for the rest of eternity? Would you follow Xiao around aimlessly for centuries more?

Or maybe you’re just stuck here. You recall a saying from an elder in Liyue years ago, “Spirits with unfinished business can’t move.”

You decided then that you were going to help him move on, help Xiao bury his love for you.

Nothing can breath, in the space Colder than, the darkest sea I have dreams about the days, driving through your sunset breeze But the first thing, that I will do Is bury my love for you

There’s no book about being a ghost. You have to figure it out on your own and you’ve never been more grateful no one can see you go straight through the wall for the third time that hour. Over time, you create your own handbook in your mind, jotting down anything you discover as your time as a dead person entails.

Within the first week, you understand that no one can see you, hear you, or feel you. And while you can vaguely touch objects and people, the sensation is different than when you were alive. Every human trait was thrown out the window - you don’t need to sleep, breathe or eat and drink anything.

You attend your funeral exactly a week after your body was discovered and someone propped your sword against your casket. You try to grasp it, to pick it up, but you only manage to push it over with a gust of nonexistent wind. It clambers to the floor, the funeral parlor growing silent, and you take this as your cue to leave.

You wondered if Xiao, or anyone of that matter, could sense you at least. Even if Xiao couldn’t see you, just him knowing you were there would ascend you to the afterlife (right?).

You also find out you can’t leave Liyue. There’s an invisible border keeping you trapped in the country and, frankly, you don’t mind. Xiao won’t leave Liyue so you don’t need to leave Liyue. But sometimes you get anxious that one day Xiao will leave Liyue and never return. And if you haven’t accomplished your goal yet, would you truly be stuck as a monster among men?

The brightness of the sun, will give me just enough To bury my love, in the Moondust I long to hear your voice, but still I make the choice To bury my love, in the moondust

On particularly good days, Xiao talks to you. Zhongli was gone early one morning and Xiao pulled himself out of bed and to the living room, opting to open the blinds and see sunlight for the first time in weeks.

You sit on the coffee table with your legs criss-crossed as Xiao mumbles desolate words.

“I keep just wishing I would wake up dead. I miss you so much.”

You frown. “I’m here, I’m right here.”

But he can’t hear you. “You aren’t here to make me laugh at your stupid jokes anymore. And I just...I should have been there! I should have-”

His voice cracks and you move off the coffee table, wrapping your arms around his quivering body. You try to press yourself against him, squeeze your arms so tight that he’ll feel you, but you can’t. You can’t kiss his chapped lips and move your bodies so he’s curled into the crook of your neck.

Sometimes, you watch Xiao hurt himself. He digs his nails into his arms or thighs until he draws blood, only to push it all away and scream into the ground. You want to snap him out of him, tell him to stop doing that to himself, but you can only sit and stare.

You were nothing to Liyue - a common human who added nothing of importance to society. Yes, your death was sad for many people but the world kept turning. Xiao, on the other hand, was so special. He was the Vigilant Yaksha - the people of Liyue needed him forever.

“I miss you. I love you. I miss you.”

I'm a cast away, and men reap what they sow And I say what I know, to be true Yeah I'm living far away, on the face of the moon I've buried my love to give the world to you

Xiao goes out sometimes. It’s either to patrol the city or on a walk with Zhongli. It’s not much but it's an improvement. Like always, you follow him.

He’s started to have nightmares, waking up in a rush. He used to comfort you when you had nightmares and it pains you that you can’t return the favor. You try, by God, you try. You run your hands down his back comfortingly but Xiao only cries harder.

When Xiao sees Ganyu for the first time in months and she gives him homemade almond tofu, he smiles. It’s small and quick but you see it.

Growing up, you had thought that the living mourned the dead. When your grandmother died, you felt broken for a while, but that pain was minimal compared to this. Having to live endless days as an invisible soul while the living grieved was unbearable.

When no one is around, Xiao breaks down. He hurts himself, insults himself and wishes for you endlessly. When Xiao tries to jump off the roof of the apartment complex in the middle of the night and survives with only an injured arm, you realize he’s pushing his body. He’s trying to kill himself.

So, you scream.

Every waking hour of the day you scream.

“I’m right here, Xiao! I love you and I’m right here! I’m sorry for being careless and getting killed but you aren’t ready to join me yet!”

You know he doesn’t hear you, he can’t hear you, and yet Xiao slowly stops hurting himself.

The brightness of the sun, will give me just enough To bury my love, in the Moondust I long to hear your voice, but still I make the choice To bury my love, in the moondust

It takes a year for Xiao to finally begin to cope with your death and you know your journey will be coming to end soon.

He still talks to you except now it’s hopeful and filled with acceptance. On the anniversary of your death, he travels to the Dragon-Queller early in the morning. He sits down in the spot he used to take you to and rubs the grass softly, as if motioning for you to sit down next to him.

You do.

“I’m leaving Liyue next week.”

A million feelings run through your veins. You want to throw up, scream, cry. Is a week enough time to get Xiao to move on from you? Had he already moved on? There were too many questions you couldn’t fucking ask.

You can’t bear to listen to the rest. Your feet travel on their own, taking you far away from Xiao and back into the heart of Liyue Harbor. You didn’t know where you were until you heard a voice call out for you.

“Hey, you!”

You were imagining voices now. You felt sick to your stomach.

“Y/N!”

A short, young woman came into your view and you finally looked up. You had walked right into the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. Hu Tao was staring at you, not through you.

“I knew you were still here.”

Hu Tao could see you.

It didn’t make sense but you didn’t have time to make it make sense. Without thinking, you cried out to Hu Tao and begged her to help you save Xiao, save yourself.

“I want to go with him,” You say.

“But you can’t.”

“Then he’s going to forget about me.”

Hu Tao chuckled softly, “You think Xiao would forget about you?”

You don’t answer. Maybe it was you that didn’t want to forget about Xiao. Either way, it hurts. “He’s going to fall in love with someone new and-”

“Isn’t that what you want?”

It was. You wanted Xiao to be happy without you, to learn to love again. You wanted him to bury his love for you so you could both be free.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Hu Tao says, “Xiao will find you again one day.”

She clasps her hands together and reaches them out to you. You look down and see a moving image of Xiao. He’s still talking softly, this time with a small smile on his lips. You close your eyes suddenly, not wanting to see anymore. You step outside of the funeral parlor and whisper “I love you” into the wind.

The sun is shining high in the sky when Teyvat begins to disappear from your vision.

Maybe in another life you and Xiao will spend forever together. You’ll have a grand wedding, start a family, and grow old together like you should have. But for now, you’ll see him from the moon.

#genshin #genshin x reader #genshin self insert #genshin angst #genshin writing #genshin impact writing #genshin xiao #xiao x reader #xiao #zhongli #hu tao #im sorry for this

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bakubitch-minusultra · 3 years

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Not Alone: Chapter One

-> an apocalyptic series with bnha characters but without quirks because im the writer and i can do whatever the fuck i want :3 anywho i hope you enjoy :)) The main love interest will be reader and bakugo i think edit: it is not going to be just bakugo it will be a love triangle k byebye for the second time oh also this is fem reader k bye lol

-> Word Count: 1.9k (I lowkey popped off)

-> Warnings: None rly just mentions of guns and blood

-> Tag list: @5sosfckss @laudthingcat

Chapter One

People would tell you that the world was made for two, but as Y/n sat in the silence of the old cellar two felt like a long lost dream. It was like wind rolling around you gently, trying to persuade you to move in all directions. It’s an ice cream cone on a boardwalk with the sun above and the salty ocean below. It’s a perfect place no one tries to remember.

Any mind left functioning in the world has evolved to be built for pain. Maybe once upon a time there had been a time and place where love and compassion was something for people to look forward to in life.

This wasn't that world anymore.

To Y/n, that type of world never existed anyways. The world had always been a selfish dark place where love is fleeting and the people are brutal. Once upon a time, true love accidentally affected those who were fortunate. But like every other beautiful thing, they polluted and corrupted it, and like everything else, it got sick.

Y/n’s seen it all. And in the end when it’s taken away the people who protested or cried the loudest, were the one who had taken it for granted the most.

Y/n looked around the cellar, in three days she barely moved. It’s her rule and because of it she can leave easier with the feeling of safety. She always ended a shopping trip with a quiet few nights in a cellar or basement.

Y/n wasn’t born to do this, she had to learn to move around quietly, how to sit still. She knew what she had to do to survive. She had lain amongst the dead, she had run through the dark woods, having to feel her eyesite clear like a wild animal and embrace the darkness.

She crept out into the beam of dust lingering in the stale air, sparkling from the sunlight that found its way down two stories into a dark cellar. The beam of light almost made her smile as she admired the light's determination. Y/n shook her head to bring her thoughts back to the harsh reality as she took her first step towards the stairs.

The explosions never seemed to destroy this home in any way. The stairs were in one piece, which had become a bit of a novelty to her. The old farmhouse was too far from any major centers or roads to have even known of the problems, at least in the beginning. The blood stain smears on the white siding outside proved that sickness has touched every single inch of this world.

The hard wood creaked under the weight of her first step. She held her breath and hoped that the creak went unheard. She slowly took another step up as she let out a shaky breath. On the third step she hesitated, listening for any sort of alarming sounds. Her heart was beating like it was trying to free itself from her constricted chest. She waited a second longer, it was another rule of hers. Never leave when you feel safe, always wait three more seconds.

She put her feet on the far sides of the stairs, where the rusty nails attached the boards to the frame. Shallow breaths make sounds in this new world, in the borderlands anyway. There was no electricity, no cars, no phones, no buzz. The world now sits quiet, as if it was sighing and taking a long inhale after what seemed like forever with mankind and the noise pollution. Y/n was at peace when she was at home, but here in the open world she was one of them. One of what was left of humanity. What scrambles to survive, most of the time seperate from everyone else.

Y/n looked through the cellar door and tried to keep her anxious heartbeat low and her breath quiet. She knew that her body needed to make some noises, but others she could control.

The house was simple. Farmhouses were always the best houses according to Y/n. They always sat a long way off the road, not that roads mattered anymore. They always have canning and pickling that would outlast any human. They always have safety supplies and extras of everything. Farmers lived the longest, just as Y/n’s father said they would.

Two trips a year was rarely enough, but Y/n knew that if she traveled any more than that she would be caught.

She walked through the small kitchen and was amazed at how pristine it still was. Everything was still in its place, just as it was the first time she came to the farmhouse, although now layers of dust had found their way into the home, along with the bits of weeds that grew in through the cracks. With no busy grandmother to buzz around cleaning and dusting the mess, everything shows the house’s years of abandonment. Vines grew up the sides of the house, like all houses. As always, she stood against the doorframe and put her hand at the top of her head as her measurement. She turned and looked at how much higher it is than the mark she foolishly put there last time she came.

She looked away from the mark and pushed away the memories of the happy little girl she used to be. She walked low to the ground toward the backdoor. She couldn’t help but laugh inside at how ridiculous it was that she still felt safer going through the backdoor, even though there was no front or back. There were only doors. They didn’t go anywhere anymore. There was no direction.

Nothing goes anywhere.

Y/n positioned the heavy pack on her back carefully. It contained jars full of heart and soul and survival. To Y/n each jar was like a gentle kiss from the old lady who canned and pickled from her own farm of fresh vegetables. She assumed there are no preservatives, no added colorings, no added salt. There weren’t any labels to contradict anything. For all she knew there was MSG in everything. Y/n found herself smiling at the letters MSG, they meant something to humanity once. That was before.

She fought back memories of nice old ladies and the world before. She had been to many worlds in her life, and being nineteen felt more life sixty most days. She took a deep breath and creaked the door open, as if the wind had opened it. She closed it and opened it again. It felt like the wind coming off the brown dirt field was playing with the door.

Her sharp eyes focused on the dirt yard. Nothing moved, everything was standing still. She knew that she should’ve been waiting for the night to travel, but she had stayed too long this time. She needed to get back. Things only lived so long alone, she knew this well. Her garden had died many times before.

The old barn door swung in the soft breeze, making it creak slightly as the long tan grass swayed and small pebbles scuttled along. Everything moved in sync with the wind. Y/n learned how to spot that.

Y/n pulled the door and cringed, she knew this was always the worst part of the walk home. She hated leaving this house.

She felt her eyes squint shot, as the intense light of the sun nearly blinded her. Her pack felt like tons of bricks on her back, but she took her first steps, desperate for the walk to be over with already. She tried not to jostle her bag too much because she didn’t want to break any jars. She learned the hard way that pickle juice is hard to get out and that backpacks were even harder to find.

Walking across the dirt and gravel driveway to the field was the worst. Y/n looked around, walking with her shotgun in her hand. She usually practiced often with her rifle and silencer at home. But on the road she always brought her shotgun. She saw it as her lucky gun. The thick cold metal made her feel strong, even though she knew what strength was.

To her, strength was not pulling the trigger. At this point in life she has yet to prove her strength to her own self. She always took the cowards path. Just like her dad told her to.

Her boots crunched along the path. She walked softly but some noises were unavoidable. She knew the noise would last until she reached the huge wheat field. Then she would be a whisper in the wind. She entered the field without looking back, when she reached the field she knew the rule.

Her legs groaned under the first steps, but after the first quarter mile she started to warm up and she enjoyed running. Her back was the issue, what with the pack being so much heavier than she had ever trained with. She gripped the shoulder straps tight until her arms couldn’t stand it for another second. Even then, she kept pushing until she reached the forest.

She ran deep intothe woods, always on the same side. Never the same path but always the same destination. The branches whipped past her. The edge of the forest was always the thickest. As the forest clears I see him. He’s smiling like always. He’s calm. He doesn’t run and jump. He waits to confirm that she hadn’t brought anything with her. He’s seen them before. He knew how bad it could be. Together both of them had seen the people get swarmed and taken, usually women.

“Hades.” Y/n whispered out of breath.

Instead of the warm greeting they both want, she quickly turned around and held her shotgun up. She walked backwards as Hades sauntered over to watch the forest. They sat behind a tree and waited and after a few minutes she put the pack down gently and climbed one of the huge trees. The thick branches were very rough against her hands. She sat on a branch and looked through her binoculars from the high viewpoint.

She could see the entire field of brown hay from where she was sitting. Y/n let herself have a weak moment and let herself imagine living in the farmhouse one day and harvesting hay. She felt her eyes strain as she tried to find even a single strand of grass moving in a way that would mean she was followed. She looked at the farmhouse sitting still and alone and hoped it would stay that way until her next trip.

She looked past the farmhouse and watched everything move just as it should. After coming to the conclusion that no one had followed her, she climbed down the tree, eager to lay in her own bed.

When her feet touched the dry ground, she looked at Hades, whose yellow eyes confirmed her thoughts. They were alone. She dropped to her knees and greetedhim as he bounded towards her. The large tundra wolf licked her face and raised his massive paws up to hug her. She would hug him so often when he was baby and one day he hugged back.

He nuzzled at her softly and nipped at her arms. She rubbed his huge soft ears and stood up. She patted him gently on his head.

“Ready?” She asked.

She picked up the heavy pack and adjusted to having it on her back again. The walk home would take an entire day if she could manage to keep a solid pace. Hades started the walk home by heading past the old broken oak tree. Their meeting place.

I worked really hard on this and so i hope people enjoy this although ik this chapter is a lil boring but i promise next chapter will be better k goodbye have a good day love u

#k tag time #i worked really hard on this #lol #bnha #mha #apocalypse #mha au #mha fanfiction #bnha fanfiction #fem reader #y/n #reader insert #eek #i dont wanna put the characters names in because they arent in this chapter and i feel like that would be lying #so hopefully people read this #oog #oof*#panty raid

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prairiesongserial · 4 years

Text

Windfield Pass 9

TW: Amputation

Anna and Marge both looked like they might faint.

“You might have guessed by...our impolite appearances, that Owl and I have had a hard journey,” Agnes began, slowly. “We ran into some trouble in the waste, on the way from Pickton. Owl was badly scared by a mutie. A Weeper.”

Agnes felt ill, besmirching Selkie’s name after she had saved their lives. But it would all have been for nothing if Owl lost her placement in Windfield.

“Oh, you poor thing,” Anna said, taking one of Owl’s hands. “You must have been terrified.”

Owl frowned. “Agnes was more scared than me. I’m not afraid of anything. Selkie is nice, and I rode on her back.”

“Selkie?”

“The motorist,” Agnes managed. There was no opportunity to tell Owl to shut her mouth, not without seeming extremely suspicious.

“Strange names down in Pickton,” Marge muttered.

“That’s not true,” Meredith said, getting upset. “Owl told me she was friends with the muties in the waste, and she’s probably a mutie herself.”

“Now, Meredith, that’s a terrible thing to say...” Marge said. But she was looking more and more uncomfortable. “Let’s sort everything out with Mayor Willin, yes, he’ll get everything straightened out…”

Marge urged them toward the door, apologizing to the still stunned Anna. Owl sulked as she was called away from the barrel, and Agnes was beginning to promise that they would go back for the kidney beans later, when she stopped short. As the bell on the doorframe tinkled behind her, Agnes realized that the streets had changed in the small group’s short absence. A party of hunters was stumbling down the main road, travel worn and miserable. They bore one of their own on a stretcher fashioned from rough hewn branches and prairie grass, dogs yapping at their heels. People spilled out of their homes and businesses to watch the procession.

The dogs scared a scream out of Owl, and she hid behind Agnes.

“Nothing to fear,” Agnes told her, in barely a murmur. “Don’t say anything else about Selkie, hear?”

“Why?” Owl said quietly. “I like Selkie. Is Selkie bad?”

Agnes squeezed Owl’s shoulder, then approached the hunters.

“Dr. Hopper,” one of them said in amazement. “You were supposed to have left. Hey, it’s Dr. Hopper!”

The rest of the hunters - few in number, only three - stopped and crowded her.

“Can you save him?” the man asked. “Damn Llorona got him.”

Agnes inspected the man on the stretcher. Selkie had ripped one of his arms to ribbons. It seemed so unnecessary, until Agnes realized it was his right arm - it would likely be his shooting arm.

“If he loses the arm, maybe,” Agnes said. “Get him inside, anywhere, and bring me a belt, and the town mason. And something that can cut stone.”

Agnes had done field amputations twice before, and only one of those patients had lived. It was an exhausting operation, and it had been so many years, she wasn’t sure she could do it anymore. She would have to take an unorthodox tack.

The hunters scattered. Agnes heard her name, heard whoops and hollers of an almost religious bent, one of the hunters calling back, “We’ll make today Hopper Day if you save ‘im, Doc!” The hunter’s friend hit him in a friendly, though chiding way and said, “Don’t say that, idiot, you aren’t the mayor.”

The hunter who had asked if Agnes could save the man on the stretcher stayed behind. He donated his own belt, and helped her drag the wounded man into Anna’s general store. Owl watched in awe, along with Meredith. There was no time to worry over them, though Agnes did wonder how Owl would feel if she found out her beloved Selkie had done this.

“Why is he like that?” Owl asked, creeping closer.

Agnes cinched the belt tight below the wounded man’s shoulder. He looked bad - his fellows had been dragging him for days. There was no way they could have gone through the Windfield pass with a stretcher in tow, which meant they had braved the mountains too, or perhaps cut north through mutie territory. It had been as hard a journey for them as it had been for Agnes and Owl.

Owl reached out and touched the man’s shoulder, as if she couldn’t believe he was real. The man’s eyes rolled to look at her, and he smiled - or maybe he was baring his teeth.

Agnes gave Owl a sharp look, and she drew her hand away.

“Save the arm, Dr. Hopper?” the wounded man said, breathing shallowly.

“Certainly not,” Agnes said. “If you live you’ll be lucky.”

The man squeezed his eyes closed. Shortly the other hunters returned, the town mason in tow. She was a young woman with deep-set eyes and brown curls twisted back into a sensible bun. She was still tying her stone-working apron on as she passed through the door.

“My God,” the mason said, fumbling with the knot. “Dr. Hopper, I - ”

Agnes searched the woman for her tools. She had brought a masonry chisel, perhaps misunderstanding her task. Behind her, two hunters staggered under the weight of a strange contraption which must have been a wet saw. It was operated by pedals and gasoline, and barely fit through the door of the general store. Agnes might have been better off calling the butcher for a cleaver. But no, she couldn’t trust the strength of her arm, nor could she trust the resolve of the butcher - or anyone else - to make a clean chop. The saw, on the other hand, cut clean, regardless of the resolve of its user.

“Alright,” Agnes said, and gestured to the mason. “You there, you can use that thing, so that’s what you’ll do. You all in the back, hold him still, at a right angle for her, and listen to everything she says.”

“You aren’t going to do it yourself?” the wounded man asked nervously. “But you’re the doctor.”

“I’m also an old woman,” Agnes snapped. “Get started.”

The mason’s hands trembled as she got her contraption ready. The hunters scrambled to move their compatriot into position. And Agnes herself chose the line onto which the mason would lower the saw. She checked the tightness of the belt.

“Someone run to the nearest house and bring me a shovelful of hot coals,” she said. “Anna, get a basin ready with strong spirits, set it nearby with a rag - a clean one. Owl, get my pack. There’s a little vial with a red syrup…”

She trailed off, thinking of the symbol Selkie had drawn for her. She had never identified herself with any of her tools. The symbol for doctor or medicine in the northwest was an intersection of green lines at a right angle. But to Selkie, it was this, this little tincture that took away pain. The most superficial of her tools - but the most empathetic. It was funny that Selkie had chosen painkiller to represent Agnes, when Selkie had been the one to necessitate its use today.

The general store buzzed with movement, the wounded man breathing shallow, anxious breaths with his arm posed just so under the saw blade. In seconds, Agnes had all she needed before her. Coals, alcohol, bandages.

“What is that? Why are you doing that?” Owl asked from underfoot. “Agnes, why is he like that. Agnes, what is that thing?”

“Give him a healthy swig of the syrup, Anna,” Agnes said, ignoring Owl. The wounded man was distracted by the vial, and at that moment Agnes silently signalled the mason, who fired up the saw. In less than a second, it was done, the wounded man too surprised to scream. At least for a moment.

“Hold him still,” snapped Agnes. She moved quickly. With heat from the coals, alcohol, and many layers of bandage from her pack, the wound was soon sufficiently clean and cauterized.

“Mason, thank you,” Agnes said. “Go home and have a drink.”

“Thank you, I will,” she muttered, stunned. And she left, staggering onto the porch.

Mechanically, Anna retrieved a mop and attended to the blood on the floor. Bodies moved this way and that in the store, mostly silent, cleaning up or caring for the wounded man, muttering in low voices about where to take him, and who would care for him. Agnes thought she caught a strange, mistrustful look in one of the hunter’s eyes. But he soon left, and Agnes put the thought out of her mind.

The general store began to clear out, leaving only Agnes, Owl, and Anna behind. Meredith had gone home as soon as the excitement was over, and Marge, likely overcome with the need to tell someone about the goings on in Anna’s store today, had left long before.

Anna dragged her mop bucket outside to dump the bloody water in the grass. Agnes watched her carefully. She was a narrow, strong woman, who set to a task, no matter how gruesome, with grace and hard work. And apparently she wanted a child. Most in Windfield had had parenthood thrust upon them, and made do. And their children made do, too.

Agnes cleaned the blood from her hands and clothes with a damp rag. Owl had appeared at her side at some point, watching Anna clean blood from the floor with more rapture even than Agnes, lost in her reverie.

“Why did you do that to him?” Owl said solemnly. “Why did they cut off his arm?”

Agnes reached down and squeezed Owl’s hand.

“Sometimes you need to be hurt more in order to get better,” she said.

“Oh,” said Owl. “I don’t get it.”

Anna returned with a fresh bucket of water. Agnes let go of Owl’s hand and stepped forward to meet Anna at the door, where they wouldn’t be overheard.

“In the last hour you’ve had enough excitement in your shop for several weeks,” Agnes said.

Anna leaned back against the doorpost, letting the mop lean next to her.

“No thanks to you,” she said. She wasn’t hostile, just honest. Agnes liked her.

“It would be silly to ask you to commit to Owl today - I’m sure the mayor can place her temporarily somewhere until someone in town adopts her. Or until someone sends word to me to find placement for her somewhere else.” Agnes smiled grimly. “Allowing Marge to handle a delicate affair was my mistake.”

Anna offered her half a smile in return. She slapped the mop back against the floor and resumed cleaning. The woman was exhausted. Agnes supposed she had better go.

“Come along, Owl,” Agnes called, re-shouldering her pack. “We have another errand or two before the day is done.”

Reluctantly, Owl pulled herself away from the rhythmic motion of Anna’s mop and followed Agnes out the door.

Windfield Pass 8 || Windfield Pass 10

#story

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i-write-shakespeare-not-disney · 5 years

Text

Fragile Hearts Ch.11- To Have Been Where We Have Been

Click the OP (Original post) if the READ MORE link does not show!

THANK YOU TO @bluejayb1rd FOR COMMISSIONING!!! IM SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG T.T also, Tumblr doesn’t transfer italics from copy paste, so.... yeah, I suggest the ao3 link, but it shouldn’t be too bad.

Click Here for Chapter 1

Click Here for Chapter 10

Fragile Hearts Playlist here

AO3 Links:

Chapter: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11928798/chapters/44004358 Full Story: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11928798

It felt like with a single blink, a month and a half had gone by. From spring break to graduation, it felt like the days had passed all too quickly.

Pidge stared at herself in the mirror, her fingers grazing over her new haircut. Accompanying Sam to get her hair dyed and styled a week ago resulted in a free haircut because her own had grown out so strangely, the hairdresser had quite literally begged her to let him fix it. Now it fell in a clean diagonal cut, voluminous by the natural waves of her hair.

Samantha and Ana had helped with her makeup. The dress she wore showed some of her old battle scars, but her graduation gown would cover those for a decent amount of time.

“Nervous?” Pidge looked from her reflection to the reflection of her friend in the mirror.

“A little,” she admitted softly. “But… I also want to get it over with.”

Sam stood next to her and wrapped an arm around her. “Well, your guys are ransacking our pantry waiting for you, so you might wanna head out there so they can see you.” Pidge laughed and shook her head. “Come on. Before I get all emotional when we haven’t even said our goodbyes yet.”

Pidge nodded and started for the door, self-conscious with the clack of her heels. She was so unused to them, they were already hurting her feet.

Sure enough when she walked out into her living room, she could hear Lance, Hunk, and Matt moving around the kitchen and the crunch of chips and the crinkling of wrappers along with their voices talking over each other.

She stood in the entrance to watch as they argued over some game until Hunk’s eyes fell on her and immediately made her blush a thousand shades of crimson. When his words stopped short, Matt and Lance looked over too.

“Pidge! You look amazing!” Lance said. He walked over to her and took her hand to twirl her around as Leon barked and pawed at her legs. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a dress.”

Matt came up to her and tucked her hair behind her ear. “Oh, Katie.” He hugged her so tightly, she felt the air leave her lungs. “Mom and Dad would’ve been so proud,” he whispered. Pidge felt a knot build in her throat. He kissed her cheek before he let go of her.

Then Hunk went up to her. She looked up at him and felt her heart hammer against her chest with the gentle way he looked at her. His eyes full of undeniable love as he touched her cheek gently. “Exquisite,” he whispered with a smile. He leaned in to kiss her chastely on her lips. He never liked to do more than that in front of Matt.

“Okay, we gotta get going, Katie. It’s gonna be a crowded mess trying to get everyone together,” Samantha said as she hooked another earring into her earlobe. “Wanna ride with me?”

“Yeah, we can meet you there after the ceremony is done. Then we get to stuff our faces with food!” Lance said. He shook her by the shoulders. “Ready to be an official graduate?”

“God yes,” she said with an exhausted sigh.

The three of them hugged her and Sam before they left the house. Sam had a pre-grad and post-grad playlist. They sang along to it and stuck with each other up until they were sitting in lined up chairs. Pidge balanced her feet on her heels, trying to calm all the nervous energy she had pent up in her body. Her graduation gown was a little rough, but she was relieved wearing it.

All that time, and she was finally sitting there, her degree within reach. She wasn’t sure what all she would do with it in Vegas yet. After so much time in war and dealing with therapy and then stressing over classes, she just wanted to breathe. She wanted to be normal for a while, with a normal job where she could just relax for a bit. But for now, she wanted to walk across that stage, get her degree, and enjoy being with the people she loved and cherished.

She might have dozed off in the ceremony if it hadn’t been for how anxious she was about walking across the stage with her heels. The closer they got to saying her name, the more restless she became.

“Katharina Holt.”

She heard an immediate response to her name. Cheers that three people alone should not have been able to make, and yet they managed it. When Pidge looked over at the sound as she walked to get her degree, she noticed a giant banner with her name and a familiar icon- the very one she’d programmed into her computer when she was fifteen. And of course, Lance had a megaphone. And Matt had noise makers. And Hunk had the lungs of a fucking opera singer.

Pidge couldn’t help but laugh and blush the entire way back to her seat.

Once all the names were called, all the families had cheered, the tassels were moved, and a final announcement was made for the graduates of 2019, a final deafening cheer gave way to the chatter of families and the clicks of cameras. Samantha, Ana, and even Sophie found her and huddled with her for selfies.

Once Matt, Hunk, and Lance found her, they also started taking photos. She got one with each of them, and a few selfies.

Then they heard someone ask, “Would you guys want one as a group?”

Pidge looked over and almost immediately recognized the Garrison uniform and the one-eyed man smiling. “I-Iverson?” He smiled wider, and his eyes nearly shut with how the corners wrinkled. “What are you doing here?” she asked through surprised laughter as she accepted his hug.

“I’m 26 and I have this internal instinct to stand at attention right now,” Lance muttered with a groan.

Iverson laughed at him and once he greeted the rest of his former students, he gave them a smile. “We get notified when a former Garrison student graduates from elsewhere. We also gave you a scholarship, so we kept track by default. But when I saw your name on the list of this year’s graduates, I had to come.” He looked past them for a second before putting a hand on Lance’s shoulder, laughing when Lance immediately tensed. “And maybe this can help you feel a little more at ease, cadet.”

“What do you-?”

“Miss Katharina Holt?”

Pidge turned and screamed, “Oh my God!” so loudly that the groups taking pictures all around them were startled.

“No fucking way…,” Lance breathed out.

Hunk was covering his face, having been speechless the entire time.

“Shiro?” Matt said softly.

Sure enough, it was Shiro. In a Garrison uniform, with his tuft of white hair and well kept stubble framing his face, pale scar still visible across his nose, and holding a large bouquet of flowers in his arms. “In the flesh. Mostly, of course,” he answered. Pidge leaned against Matt for support and Lance sat himself on the floor to handle the shock. Hunk was the first to move, engulfing Shiro in a hug. “Hey, Hunk. It’s good to see you,” Shiro said with a gentle smile.

“Oh my God, it’s Shiro. Oh my God. Oh my God, it’s fucking Shiro.” Lance seemed to have short-circuited, repeating the same over and over.

Pidge could feel herself shaking, even as she took the bouquet and hugged him tightly. “How did you even get here?” she asked, her voice unable to go above a whisper all of a sudden.

She pulled back, reaching out to touch his face and his hair as if to be sure he was real. Shiro chuckled and let her as he explained. “Well, Iverson told me you were graduating, so I came back to the Garrison for a while. I wasn’t sure if we should approach you, but when we saw these guys here with you, we figured… why not? I hope that was okay?”

“Yes! Yes, absolutely!” Shiro smiled wider and switched to greet Matt. Pidge moved closer to Hunk who was wiping at his eyes and sniffing. “Thank you so much for coming. That means so much to me,” she told Iverson.

Iverson looked at her, his gaze full of mirth. “Katie, you snuck into my office and returned with fake documents as a boy and became a paladin who saved the world. This is honestly the least I could ever possibly do.” Pidge laughed and felt herself blush. She felt Hunk’s hand slide into hers as Shiro knelt down to coax Lance off the ground where he seemed to be shaking. “And I don’t know if it’s something you might want, but you should know that if you ever need it, a job will always be available for you with the Garrison.” He smiled, and Pidge thanked him again.

“We should get someplace without so many spectators,” Pidge suggested when she saw that people kept glancing over at the uniformed men and the person sitting on the grass in a suit. “Love, you should help Shiro get Lance up.”

Hunk nodded and moved to heft Lance up. He was unsteady in his steps, but he leaned against Hunk for support. “Well, I think a celebration is now doubly called for,” Hunk said, absentmindedly soothing Lance. “We’re heading to Pidge’s to finish packing up for the move before partying. You’re coming right?” he asked Shiro.

“If you don’t mind extra people there,” Shiro said with a smile.

“Of course I don’t mind! This is insane!” Pidge hooked her arm into her brother’s. “This is a better surprise than I ever could have dreamt up, Shiro. I wouldn’t want you to go so quickly.”

Shiro looked at Iverson. “What do you say? Lay down some higher duties for a fun night of catching up?” Iverson laughed and agreed. “We’ll meet you there, just give me the address.”

It was easier to finish packing with two extra hands. Pidge hardly had to do much more than tell them which boxes to get and where to arrange them in the U-haul. They were done just in time for her roomates who returned from celebratory dinners.

They were dumbstruck at the sight of Shiro in uniform, and Pidge couldn’t help but laugh to herself. Of course, Sam knew who he was right away.

“Oh wow, it’s an honor to meet you,” she said, wide-eyed as she incessantly shook his hand. “My brother loves you so much-”

“W-what?” Shiro asked with a nervous laugh.

“You haven’t heard of Lance’s best-selling series? It’s all the hype in the YA genre,” Matt said, nudging Lance playfully.

“I had to pull a lot of strings to get the Garrison to turn a blind eye to that,” Iverson said with a huff. “But I’m proud to see how far along you’ve come too. All of you.” Pidge, Matt, Hunk, and Lance looked at each other and smiled. It was so strange to think that they’d all been in his class at some point, reprimanded and muttering under their breath. Before they knew anything about anything.

But the comment also made something cold sprout in Pidge’s heart because she couldn’t help but notice how much more prominent it was that they were still missing a teammate. And based on the look on Hunk and Lance’s faces, they felt it too.

Shiro was getting an over-excited run down of the books he hadn’t known he was part of from Sam, and once she managed to catch him up to the best of her knowledge which came from her brother, he went over to Lance.

As Iverson continued talking to Matt, Pidge stayed off to the side with Hunk. He wrapped his arms around her and swayed her gently as she watched the scene. The people from her past life catching up with nostalgia in their laughter and the people in her new life dancing and singing along to music that played on a speaker, celebrating a milestone. It felt surreal seeing them both in one place, but at the same time it seemed normal. With Sam asking Matt and Iverson questions about the Garrison, and Ana trying to offer them food, Sophie flirting obnoxiously with Lance and Shiro simultaneously, and Leon running around and getting pet by everyone.

“You okay?” Hunk whispered in her ear.

She hummed and nodded. “It’s overwhelming. But also relaxing,” she said. She turned to him and mess with the collar of his shirt. “It feels like I could’ve been doing this all along, you know?”

“Honeybee… You can’t keep berating yourself over the past. Besides it was a choice we all made.” She nodded and wrapped her arms around him. “Come on. You’re a graduate now. How does that feel?”

“Ugh, like I can finally breathe!” she said with a laugh. She looked up at him and smiled. “I missed you so much.”

“Well now you’ll be a quick drive away. No more long distance. We did it.” She smiled wider and sighed as he leaned in to kiss her.

They heard someone clear their throat and broke apart to see Shiro looking at them with a smile that made crow’s feet appear in the corner of his eyes. “So when did this start?” he asked. “You two were always a good pair, and I guess this was bound to happen.”

Hunk laughed and started playing with her hair. “It’s only been a handful of months. But yeah, it feels like longer sometimes. We gotta thank Lance and the blatant lack of secrecy in his books.” Pidge laughed and nodded, recalling the night they first kissed. “How have you been, Shiro? What’s the universe like without us?”

“Oh, you know. They miss us. They still sell figurines and they have ‘vintage’ photos of the days we visited. But everyone’s safe and happy. Allura and Coran are out there helping the planets prosper. They work with me in keeping relations with Earth and all that.” Shiro looked over his shoulder and Pidge saw Lance with Iverson, blushing at something. Based on the way Sam was laughing, Iverson must have been embarrassing him. Shiro looked back at them. “Lance said you guys found him at a book signing.”

“Yeah. My roommate told me about his books and then I found his books and Hunk found a book tour and…. Yeah.”

“You guys… haven’t heard from Keith, have you?”

Hunk and Pidge shared a look. “No. Lance found a photography portfolio he has online, but….”

“I… found his location around that time. It might have changed, but I never told Lance. I offered to find him, but Lance never got back to me,” Pidge said.

Shiro frowned, looking at Pidge then Hunk. “You did something illegal, didn’t you?” Pidge winced and smiled innocently. “Some things just don’t change,” he said with a smile.

“Wait, so… Keith hasn’t even been in contact with you?” Hunk asked.

Shiro shook his head. “Lance asked too, but…. No. I haven’t heard from him, and I don’t get a lot of news when I’m off in a different galaxy.” He sighed and chugged what was left of his beer. “Do you mind sending that portfolio my way?”

“Yeah, of course,” Pidge said.

“So, Pidge. What’s next for you? Moving in with Matt in Vegas and what?”

“I’m not sure yet. I kind of want to take time to calm down. Maybe travel a bit or something? Settle in to Vegas. I do want a job doing what I love with computational skills, but… I’ve done that for so long now, I just want a break.” She felt Hunk massaging her shoulders languidly. “Maybe try to convince Lance to move there too. So he’s not so far away.”

In the kitchen, Ana had taken out a few bottles of liquor and was already setting up for mixers, shots, and whatever else people wanted to have. “Everybody get a drink so we can make a toast!” she called out. Everyone lined up to get something, sipping idly until they were ready for a toast. Ana cleared her throat and raised her glass. “Katie, you’ve been a wonderful roommate and an amazing friend. You’re possibly the smartest person I have ever met and I know I’ll see your name in scientific journals that future college students will have to read and use for research.” Pidge laughed and shook her head. “It’s hard to believe that you’ll be moving away. We’re gonna miss you so much, and we better be invited to your wedding because we absolutely love Hunk!”

“Oh my God,” Pidge said, blushing as she hid her face in Hunk’s arm.

“The four of us graduated today,” Sam said, stepping next to Ana. “But Katie, it’s no secret that you’ve come the farthest. So it’s not just a grad party, but a going away party, and a much needed celebratory party to thank you for everything you’ve done. For us and everyone around you.” Sam managed to keep it vague enough, for the other girls, but Pidge and her former teammates knew what she meant. And they knew that gratitude extended to them. “So a toast to making it through the biggest obstacles and finally reaching the finish line. I’m so happy to have been a part of it with you for the last four years.”

“To Katie!” Sophie said with a wide smile. “And to the class of 2019!”

“To the class of 2019!” they all responded before drinking.

The music was turned up again. They ordered more food to spread on the table. They danced and talked and said goodbyes and reminisced- either about school years or veteran years. Before long Sophie and Ana were drunk, singing along to the karaoke as Pidge suffered the second-hand embarrassment and gave Iverson an apologetic smile.

Iverson only shook his head and continued to drink his whiskey and spent the time talking with his former students or Sam who said her brother would be interested in being part of the program. Sam was the one who bounced about rambling about everything, practically bursting with the awe and feeling starstruck. She asked Lance about signing a copy of a book for her brother and then listened to Shiro describe what the galaxies were like now, and she rambled to Hunk about how he was her brother’s favorite character and how he resonated with him most, then asked Matt what Vegas was like.

Somewhere among the chaos, Hunk took her hand and pulled her aside. They slipped into her room, which was now mostly bare except for Sam’s side.

“I was hoping to steal you away for a dance,” he said, using his phone to scroll through music.

“How sweet,” she said a giddy laugh. She’d had enough to drink to feel light, but not enough to make a fool of herself in front of Iverson or her brother. She felt warm and happy and floaty.

The strum of a guitar filled the room, louder than the muffled noise on the other side of the door. She slipped her hand into Hunk’s as he pulled her near and started stepping side to side, the two of the twirling in a circle.

“This is our first dance as a couple,” she realized as Hunk spun her around gently before pulling her back into him.

“That’s true. But it’ll be hard to surpass dancing in a living room with the furniture pushed aside and fireworks outside the window.” She laughed and pulled her hand away to wrap her arms around his neck instead. “You look happy.”

“I am. I’m with you.” Hunk smiled and nudged his nose against hers gently. “Teach me to say it.” He hummed in confusion. “How to say I love you in Samoan.” Hunk said the phrase, then said it slowly, with Pidge repeating each word after him. The words felt funny on her tongue, but she was determined to learn it. She wanted to tell him she loved him in every language she could. “Okay. Oute a-alofa… ia te… oe.” Hunk nodded, the smile on his face serene and adoring and wonderful. “Oute alofa ia te oe.”

Hunk cupped her face and kissed her, letting the music play around them. The warmth in her body magnified, and she felt dizzy with all of Hunk encompassing her. He pulled away and ran his thumb over her cheek lightly. “I love you so much,” he whispered.

“Will you stay with me tonight?” she whispered. “I know you have a hotel, but….” She shrugged and he tucked her hair behind her ear.

“Of course.” He kissed her forehead, and Pidge sighed as she let herself melt against him. “We should get back to the party,” he whispered.

“Mm. Yeah.” She pulled away and took his hand. “I can’t believe Shiro found us.”

“Well, it’s thanks to Iverson. He contacted him for your graduation.” Hunk opened the door for her and they managed to catch the end of a drunk rendition of Hollaback Girl from Ana and Sam. “You know, we were always so terrified of Iverson as students. Who knew all it took was two drunk college girls to scare him?”

Pidge turned and saw Iverson staring at the karaoke with wide eyes and a confused look. She laughed to herself and walked over to sit with him. “Hardened war vet scared of a couple of twenty-year olds?” she teased.

He scoffed and puffed out his chest. “Of course not!” Pidge arched an eyebrow. He deflated and clinked the ice in his glass. “It’s the singing.” That made Pidge laugh even more.

Shiro came up to them, chewing on some nachos. “We’ll head out as soon as I finish this, okay?” Iverson waved a hand dismissively. “As for you two- I’m gonna hear from you more now right?”

“Absolutely,” Pidge promised. She wrapped her arms around him and leaned into him. “I’m really glad you came. It really was the best gift I could have gotten today.”

“I always knew you’d do great things, Pidge,” he said, ruffling her hair.

At that moment, Leon trotted up to them, leash in his maw as he pawed at Hunk’s leg and whined. “Hey buddy, you gotta go outside?” Hunk glanced around and frowned. “Where’s Lance?”

“Uh, I’m not sure, maybe in the bathroom. Here, I can take him,” Pidge offered. She clipped his leash onto his collar and tugged gently. “Come on boy.” She opened the door and froze before she could even fully step out.

Leon barked causing Lance and Sophie to split apart. “Um. Hey, Pidge,” Lance said weakly.

“What the fuck…?” Pidge muttered. Having stayed at the doorway, the others inside came to peer out. Lance was trying to get the lipstick smudges off his mouth and chin, and Sophie was blushing furiously.

“What are you doing out here?” Sophie asked, her words slurring together.

Pidge looked at Lance and held out the leash. “Leon wanted to go outside. Um. Sorry to interrupt?” She turned around and ushered everyone back inside and shut the door. “So that’s a good note to end the party on, right?”

“She was flirting with him all night,” Hunk said. “Guess that was bound to happen.”

Pidge laughed it off, but she couldn’t help the unease in her chest. She knew Lance still had Keith on his mind, and frankly who he made out with was none of her business, but Sophie? Sure they weren’t exactly enemies, but she was definitely her least liked roommate.

“Some things just don’t change,” Shiro echoed. “Okay, yeah, we’re going to head out. I have a number for my office in the Garrison. Keep me up to date, okay? I’ll get in touch when I come back down again, and maybe you guys can give me a tour of Vegas. I’ve only been once.”

“If you see Coran and Allura, tell them we miss them,” Pidge said.

“Oh! Actually, hold on.” Hunk pulled out his wallet and pulled out a folded polaroid photo. “I I took this of all of us the last time they they visited. Give it to them.” It was a photo of Pidge, Lance, Hunk, and Matt sprawled out on the couch, laughing. It was slightly blurry and tilted because taking a selfie with a polaroid was hard, but it was a good photo. “And see if you can get one of them to bring back for us.”

Shiro smiled and tucked the photo in his uniform pocket. “I will. It was really great seeing you guys again. Safe travels and good luck.” He hugged them each and Pidge had to consciously remind herself to let go. “I promise we’ll stay in touch this time.”

Pidge nodded then turned to Iverson to hug him too. Then she and Hunk followed them out to the car. They said goodbye to Lance when they saw him outside, but Lance still looked embarrassed.

They waited for their headlights to disappear down the street before heading back inside. Lance was leaning against the wall with Leon, and Pidge figured Sophie must have gone back inside.

“Go ahead, let me hear it,” he muttered, kicking at the ground.

“Hear what?” Hunk asked. Lance gave him a deadpan look. Hunk sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Dude, you’re an adult. We’re not teenagers anymore, and you can do what you want.”

“Then why can I feel your judgement from here?” Pidge and Hunk shared a look and Lance scoffed. “No, no, no don’t do that! Don’t do the thing. You know, the thing where couples have a whole conversation with a look. Just talk to me.”

“Lance, I’m more upset because you decided to swap spit with Sophie. Of all my roommates.”

Hunk sighed. “And it’s not fair to her. You’re not into her, Lance, and we all know it. You’re still hung up on Keith-”

“Yeah, and what do I do about that?” he snapped. “It’s not like you and Pidge. You guys got lucky. You guys met again and you were still in love with her and it worked out. Keith left me. He’s disappeared off the face of the Earth and the probability of seeing him again are slim, and even if I did, it’s not like we can just pick up where we left off. And I can’t spend another five years getting over it.” He rubbed his face tiredly and then scratched his head, stuffing his other hand into his jeans pocket. “I’m sorry I kissed her, Pidge. She was pushing, and I was lonely and tipsy and I figured it wouldn’t hurt. I didn’t mean to ruin your fun.”

Pidge smiled and hooked her arm with his. “You didn’t. I just don’t like her. Besides she’s a really messy drunk, and she’ll probably forget this by tomorrow. And I told you- if you want me to find him, I can. Just say the word.”

“What if you can’t?” he whispered.

Pidge looked at Hunk. He nodded. “I already did once.” Lance’s head snapped up. “He was in some tiny island in the middle of nowhere. You still weren’t sure if you wanted to look for him, so I didn’t tell you. But if you want to find him now, I can help.”

Lance stared at her, wide-eyed for a moment. Pidge was already itching to get her hands on her laptop. Then he shook his head. “No. No, if he… if he doesn’t want to be found, then…. I want to respect that. He hasn’t even contacted Shiro. He doesn’t want us finding him. I just gotta move on. Thank you though, Pidge.”

She nodded and wrapped an arm around him. “We love you, Loverboy.”

“Oh my God,” Lance groaned.

Hunk laughed and opened the door for them to head back inside. Sophie was already half asleep on the couch and Matt was making himself another hot dog. Ana and Sam were crying about something and talking over each other in high pitched voices and hugging.

Pidge helped get Sophie to her bed. Ana and Sam decided to share Ana’s so Lance could sleep in Sam’s. Matt would sleep on the couch. Hunk, of course, would sleep with Pidge.

They cleaned up a bit, mostly getting trash into bags and dishes loaded into the dishwasher, before they split up for some much needed rest before they caught their plane the next day. Lance was in charge of making sure everything on the U-Haul made it to Vegas, but he wouldn’t be going with them to Vegas. Then Pidge would settle in at Matt’s and start her normal adult life.

But in that moment, with everyone settled into their sleeping arrangement, it felt like their old sleepovers. Pidge, Lance, and Hunk stayed up a little later, laughing and whispering in the dark. It wasn’t until their voices became heavy with a need for sleep that they let the conversation die out and each succumbed to sleep.

---

Within the next day, Pidge had moved across the country. She didn’t have a lot of her stuff yet other than the luggage she managed to load on the plane. It would be another handful of days before her stuff arrived. The jetlag was so bad, Pidge immediately fell asleep even though it was only seven thirty when she arrived. Hunk stayed because he was pretty exhausted too, and Matt didn’t even make it to the bed- he just turned on the TV and immediately knocked out on the couch.

Even so, Pidge didn’t fully wake up until a little past noon the following day. Hunk was scrolling through his phone when she opened her eyes, one hand idly stroking her hair.

“Hey,” she mumbled, burrowing her face into his chest. “What are you doing?”

“Reading up on news,” he answered. “How’d you sleep?”

“I slept to the point where I’m exhausted, and my body hurts,” she said with a light laugh. “I’m starving.”

“I can make food.” Hunk kissed her forehead lightly and got out of bed. Pidge watched him go and smiled to herself. She couldn’t believe she’d get to have more mornings like this.

She pulled herself out of bed and cleaned herself up a bit before heading out to the kitchen. By the time Hunk finished cooking, even Matt had been lured out of his room.

It was nice to eat with them without the constant reminder that she’d have to leave soon. She was home now. For good.

---

By the next weekend she was home, her stuff had arrived and Hunk helped her decorate and arrange her room. To celebrate the official end of moving in, Hunk arranged a date night at his place.

When they arrived at his apartment, Hunk covered her eyes before unlocking the door. “Has your place been set up all day?” Pidge asked, biting back her smile.

“Honeybee, I've had this planned since you booked your flight home.” Pidge laughed and let him lead her inside. “Okay, ready?” She nodded and Hunk uncovered her eyes. “Open.”

She opened her eyes and felt her heartbeat stutter at the sight of flower petals leading to the living room where the furniture had been pushed away to make way for a blanket. The lamps were on their lowest setting, filling the place with a soft light. By the time she turned to face Hunk, he'd gotten a hold of a basket that looked like it had been plucked right out of a movie.

“Oh my God….”

Hunk smiled and shrugged. “You always said you wanted a date like in the movies. It's no park, but I figured-”

“It's perfect. I love it,” she said with a laugh that bubbled up from her chest and pushed her to wrap her arms around Hunk. “I love you.”

Hunk smiled in a way that made her heart melt. In a way that made her feel like the most important person in the universe.

He took her hand and led her to the living room. They sat down and Hunk pulled out the food he'd prepared. Pidge couldn't help but laugh when he pulled out her favorite picnic food- peanut butter banana sandwiches with the crust cut off. He pulled out Capri-Suns and pudding cups. Pidge had to hide her face because she was blushing and smiling so much.

It really was perfect.

Hunk played music on a speaker. Soft love songs that faded into the background as they talked and ate, but Pidge noticed a couple of songs that she had mentioned she loved in passing.

“Stay still, you have pudding on your face,” Pidge said, reaching forward to wipe at Hunk's cheek.

Hunk grabbed her hand and tilted his face against it. He pressed a kiss to her palm and pulled her closer.

“You're breathtaking, you know that?” Pidge felt herself blush to the tips of her ears and Hunk chuckled. “I could spend every day of forever counting every freckle on your face and every speck of green in your eyes.”

Pidge bit her lip and touched his face with her free hand. “You know… if you really think about it… that would be very creepy.”

Hunk's bellowing laughter filled the room. Then he cupped her face and kissed her through his smile “Pidge, my sweet honeysuckle, you are the epitome of romance.”

She shrugged and smirked at him. “What can I say? I'm a natural.”

Hunk brushed his nose against hers in a slow eskimo kiss. “So how have you enjoyed your first week as an official Vegas resident?”

Pidge took a breath and let it out with a hum. “Let's see. I spent the first day mostly cuddling with you. I haven't had any tests or homework to worry about. I've binged TV with Matt and spent the night with you.” She nodded. “Yeah. Pretty awesome first week.” Hunk laughed and brushed her hair back. “Kiss me.”

He didn't have to be told twice. He cupped her face with his wide hands, keeping her safe and loved between them. His mouth was soft and moved slowly against hers until Pidge had fully relaxed against him.

She shifted to sit in his lap, her legs bent on either side of him. She felt his thumb slide along her cheek, then along her jawline, then down the side of her throat. She hummed against his lips and took a sharp breath when he pulled away from her in favor of tilting her head and kissing her neck.

He froze and rubbed soothing circles into her hip. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” she breathed.

Hunk's lips pressed against her skin and Pidge let her mouth fall open at the sensation of heat that bolted through her. This was so new, it was so new.

She'd been with Hunk for months now, had spent the night with him several times, but the most that had come of it were heavy makeout sessions that they both had to feel back from. Whether it was because they both had a level of apprehension for anything more or because neither of them wanted to do much more if Pidge would be leaving, or if it was something else entirely, she wasn't sure.

She just knew that this was a new side of Hunk she didn't know. Though not entirely. Because even as his hands roamed her body, they stayed at her back, or along her waist, or down the side of her leg. Even with her breaths turning shallow, and the small whimpers of surprise she let out in his ear, he stayed on safe areas of her body.

Then she felt the way he sucked against her skin, the way her skin sparked when his teeth grazed it, and she gasped. She shoved her hands into his hair, keeping him in place, her hips moving of their own accord against him.

He moaned and pulled back, his forehead resting on her shoulder as their breaths tried to even out.

“I'm sorry,” she whispered.

He shook his head. “No, it's okay, love. I just… just don't want to get too carried away.”

“Is that for yourself or for me?”

Hunk brushed his nose against hers. “You. I know… I know you said you haven't done anything. And you went through some shitty people….” He touched her face lightly and twirled a strand of hair that fell forward around his finger. “It's not something I want to trigger or rush or-”

Pidge leaned in to kiss him and wrapped her arms around his neck. She pulled back and buried her face in the crook of his neck. “I trust you. I feel safe with you.” She pulled away to look him in the eyes. “Ever since I got back on Earth, I haven't felt safe around any guys. Especially after what happened in my friend's dorm…. But with Lance and Matt, I feel okay. And with you?” She grabbed his hands and intertwined them with hers. “I feel so safe with you. I don't feel afraid of anything when I'm with you.” She kissed his hands and rested her cheek against one. “I know you'd never hurt me.”

Hunk smiled at her and kissed her again. “Well if it's alright with you… I don't really want to do this on my living room floor.” Pidge laughed and nodded in agreement.

She stood up so he could stand too. Then he scooped her up in his arms, making her shriek and laugh as she clung to him.

He carried her to the bedroom and laid her slowly on the bed. Pidge's heart was pounding with what the night had decided to surprise her with. She didn't believe in the whole concept of her worth laying in her virginity. She'd never been religious enough to identify with that. But that didn't mean it wasn't important.

Sex was something intimate and vulnerable to her. She wanted her first time to matter and of course she wanted it to be special. She was still nervous, though. Hunk was her best friend. She loved him with all her heart. He knew her better than anyone. But everything would still be new, and not knowing what to expect… that scared her.

Hunk had returned to kissing her. A kiss not unlike all their other kisses when they were alone. Slow. Gentle. Soothing.

One hand held him up, the other rubbed soothing circles against her side, over her shirt.

Pidge took his hand and led him under her shirt, letting his hand splay across her stomach. He traced his fingertips there, not quite tickling, but still lightly enough to give her goosebumps. His breaths turned shallow.

He kissed her neck again and this time Pidge arched up into him. Heat pooled in her stomach, between her legs, and she felt her heart pound louder in her ears. His hand trailed up just under her bra and he hesitated.

“Okay?” he asked with a shaky voice. She nodded and his finger traced the top edges of the cup. Skin she had never let anyone touch. She shivered, her breaths trembling as her toes curled.

Her shirt was hiked up as far as it could go, but oddly enough she didn't feel as self-conscious as she thought she would. Her skin was pale, with obvious tan lines with the recent spring and summer sun. Freckles everywhere. Her stomach wasn't flat no matter how often she told herself she'd start working out again. And then the scars. Long, white, jagged lines that had faded only slightly over time.

Hunk's knee nudged her legs apart and she gasped when he settled himself between them. He was breathing heavily a sound that was loud over the hammering of her heart in the quiet room. Pidge was grateful for the slowness of it all. He pulled his hand away to settle on the mattress and burrowed his face against her shoulder. His beard tickled, but before Pidge could comment, he scooped his arms around her and she realized he was shaking.

She stilled and moved her hands to his face, insisting on getting him to look at her.

“Hey, what is it?”

“Nothing,” he whispered. But she recognized that look in his eyes. That distant look like he wasn't fully there, the furrow of his eyebrows. His lower lip trembled and his breaths hadn't slowed down. “I'm okay.”

“Hunk. We can stop. You can tell me if you want to stop.”

He sighed and settled over her, his arms around her, holding her between himself and the bed. He rested his head on her chest and she settled for running her fingers through his hair.

She could still feel the slight tremors of his body. His voice was small when he spoke. “But it's you. I love you, and-”

“And we don't need to do this for me to believe that. I know you love me. And you always make me feel loved. But you've had your own bad history with this, and I understand if you want to wait more. Besides, I was kind of nervous too.” She ran her fingers along his tattooed arm and smiled. “We've got time. We're not in a war that's gonna put us in danger. I'm not on the other side of the country anymore.”

He turned to bury his face in her chest. She was flat enough that it was still a chaste gesture, and for once, she didn't feel so self-conscious about small boobs. He didn’t speak again until he’d stopped hyperventilating.

“I love you,” he said, muffled by her bunched up shirt. “But… I think I do need to stop.”

“Okay,” she said. “I love you too.” She followed the swirl of black ink in his skin. “Can you tell me about your tattoos again?”

Hunk shifted to lay beside her. She took the chance to pull her shirt back down and rolled onto her side to face him as his arm pulled her closer.

Hunk began to tell her the stories behind the tattoo sleeve he had. The swirl of flames, ocean waves, tumultuous clouds, earthly rocks, and leafy vines. The lion paw. The arrows, the intricate lines of patterns that derived from Samoan designs. He told her about going into the shop for several sessions, slowly piecing the puzzle together. How he hoped to fill his whole arm one day, maybe his back too, so it could tell his life story.

“You wanna be your own body quilt?” she asked, slightly amused.

“Why not? I could add how we came back to each other. Finding Lance. Seeing Shiro again.” He shrugged and leaned in to kiss the top of her head. “I always said that if I ever had kids, I’d add their handprints or something. Document the milestones.”

“Don’t they hurt?”

Hunk smirked. “You want one?” Pidge winced and smiled. “It depends. These didn’t hurt much. Felt like a pinch or a scrape. I mean, honestly, compared to some stuff we went through with Voltron? Not too bad.” He traced a finger over Pidge’s arm, connecting the freckles with his finger. “You already have art on your body.”

“My freckles?” she asked with a disbelieving laugh. “I mean… I don’t hate them, but they’re not art.”

“They’re like stars. You’ve got constellations all over you. You’re a galaxy, honeybee.” Her ran a finger over one of her scars which ran from her elbow to the back of her forearm. “Complete with shooting stars and meteors.”

She chuckled and poked the top of his nose. “I think you’re the only one who sees it that way, love.”

He shrugged. “More for me to admire then. I’ve traveled the universe, but I’ve got a whole other universe right here in you.” Pidge felt her heart swell and her cheeks burned. It was so easy to believe him when he looked at her that way.

“I love you,” she whispered, putting all of her adoration and love and fascination into those three syllables.

The smile that spread on his face was slow and sleepy, but warm and full of joy. “My heart is yours,” he answered. Pidge’s lips parted in surprise. Her heartbeat fluttered and every part of her relaxed further to curl into him.

Their breaths slowed as they started to fall asleep. Pidge had a fleeting thought of how lucky she was to have fallen in love with someone who love her without inhibitions and did everything to make sure she never forgot or doubted it. Hunk loved her for who she was, and he had since they were young. Pidge never had to hide anything from him, never had to shy away or cover her body or quell her quirks. Hunk knew all of it. Loved all of her.

It was more than she ever dreamed of experiencing.

#hidge #team punk #yellowgreen #hunk and pidge #fragile hearts

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