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tainbocuailnge · 2 months

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Hey, do you have or know where to find a breakdown on the "people die when they are killed" line? I distinctly remember reading an analysis of the meaning that was lost in translation/adaptation, and I thought I saw it on your blog, but I can't find it now (though I've enjoyed the excuse to deep dive good Fate posts again).

that line has been such a hot topic of discussion for so long that there's been a billion posts you could be referring to so I'll just give you the explanation myself again

"to not die when killed" is a pretty common japanese turn of phrase. "to be killed" should be understood here as "to be lethally injured," and "not dying even when killed" means "being able to survive even lethal injuries". it does not read as something odd to say in japanese, and in english it does not read as something odd in context either.

what shirou says is "people die when they are killed, that's how it's supposed to be." the scene in question happens near the end of fate route, when he's giving avalon back to saber so that she's better equipped to fight gilgamesh. shirou, until this point, has not been dying when he gets killed because of avalon's restorative powers, and he'd been relying on these restorative powers to throw himself headfirst into danger to satisfy his traumatic saviour complex. saber asks him if he's sure about giving up that safety net, and he responds by saying yeah, this isn't something I was supposed to have anyway. avalon is what allowed him to repeatedly throw himself in front of saber to "protect" her and live to get scolded for it later, and giving it back to her means he will truly trust her to fight for him now.

also, people die when they are killed. shirou, for most of his life since kiritsugu saved him until this point, hasn't really been a person so much as an empty husk propelled forward by trauma and survivors guilt. he'd been throwing himself into these lethal situations because he doesn't value himself and his life as anything other than a tool to save others. but through his growing relationship with saber he's been forced to confront this way of thinking and how the ways he endangers himself hurt the people that care about him as a person. people die when they are killed, and shirou hasn't been dying when he's killed, but he's ready to be a person now.

#grammarpedant #metapost #king of asks

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clairelsonao3 · 5 months

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Where are all the stories???

Is it just me or is there much less fiction coming across my Tumblr dash right now (or altogether?) I still see a fair amount of short whump prompt-type things, which is great, but what I really want are some ongoing OC stories I can get invested in! Something romantic, whumpy, dramatic, angsty, or (even better) all of the above? 🙏

I know people are SO busy right now, but I know I'm not the only one who actually tends to do MORE reading this time of year! (Or maybe I'm just procrastinating on other stuff, but oh well!😄)

And of course, I may have just missed some great stuff, too!

So I'll tell you what: Please interact and send a link if you've posted something recently you'd like me to check out and I PROMISE to give it a look and reblog it! 🥰

ETA: If you want me to read something, PLEASE specify what it is or I'll never find it, lol.

#writeblr #metapost #whump #romance #writing #original characters #ocs #original fiction #writers on tumblr #original writing #writing community #whumpblr

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anpanman95 · 3 months

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God DO I have things to say about this one here…

CONTROVERSIAL REVIEW AHEAD

Last Twilight: why Day’s character is a major RED FLAG 🚩🚩🚩

DISCLAIMER: I do not have anything against him as an actor. He’s a beautiful sweet talented cutie pie that is doing such an amazing job it causes me to hate the motherfluffing guts of this character.

To make this easier I’ve broken down this to five points.

Day’s personality sucks: first of all, he is a rich, spoiled child (I hope all of us agree on this one) who’s clearly full of himself, and only cares about himself. This is demonstrated in several ways, but the most blatant one is in how he believes that his tragedy is the worst possible scenario anyone could be in, and fails to have a single ounce of empathy for anyone around him unless, of course, it has to do something with him. Yes. What happened to him was horrific, and traumatizing, but he is not the only human being in the world who has problems. Which brings me to my next point.

Having a disability does not give you the right to be an asshole. “Oh but every person deals with their own stuff differently” Honey, no. The whole point is that having a disability does not make you any less than any other human being. Question: Doesn’t Day want for people to stop feeling pity for him? to not treat him differently?. Well guess what darling: that implies you also still have to be and function like a decent person. Yes, again, I’m very sorry about what he has to go through, which is a horrible and unexpected experience, and I could never imagine what that’s like, but literally no one in his life wished this upon him. He acts as if everyone around him is to be blamed for what happened.

Spoiled part 2: He has a roof over his head. A fancy one might I add. He lives comfortably. He has healthy, unlimited food, done by a professional chef, might I add AGAIN, and he does not appreciate his family and what they do for him, not even once. Does he not understand that his life could be much, much worse? I’m not saying he can’t be angry or depressed or deal with his trauma however he needs to be able to heal, but there’s a difference that he doesn’t seem to understand: being angry at a situation that is out of anyone’s control, and being angry or directing that anger to people who just want to help. Which brings me to my last two points:

Day’s crappy behavior towards his family: Lets start with the mother. She is, of course somewhat at fault for what Day has to go through. But only because she is being unreasonably overprotective, something that could have been solved anyway without Day being an absolute prick about it. (Also pick one of your children to give all your love and attention to and abandon the other? what is wrong with you). Now to his brother Night. Oh God. I don’t think you understand how angry I was when Day said “I forgive you for everything”. Bitch what the f? Forgive Night? for treating him like absolute garbage, as if he had never been your own brother? Like he planned the whole fiasco? He gets mad after the accident because his brother TRIES TO CHANGE for the BETTER. And accuses him from TRYING TO STEAL THE GOOD SON TITLE FROM HIM??! Be for real bitch. This circles back to point one: He only cares about himself. Night has been traumatized almost as much as Day because of the accident. It is obvious he blames himself and probably will never forgive himself fully for what happened. On top of that he gets an awful mother and brother? Nah. Count me out. I would have resigned from that family and go live with beautiful sweet Porjai to a small village and never be contacted by those people again.

Mhok: Oh dear. Oh dear. He is literally the greenest of green flags out there. Sure. He’s a little volatile. Sure, he has done violent things. But he would have NEVER hurt Day or any of their friends/family. My boy was just trying to do his job, cause, mind you, HE HAS NO MONEY OR FAMILY TO SUPPORT HIM LIKE YOU DO, DAY. The money and family you disrespect every single day. And what the f with telling him what to do with his life? Who the f do you think you are? Mr. Righteous? Mr. Perfect? More like Mr. Red Flag 101. Day basically broke Mhok’s heart because Mhok didn’t want to be away from him. So, first of all, I don’t believe for a second Mhok’s intentions were out of pity. Maybe they came from a place of WORRY and a little bit out of infatuation because he liked him so much and didn’t want to be away from him. But never pity. EVEN SO. IF Mhok felt “pity” for Day, the correct thing to do, as two fluffing functioning adults, is to TALK. Why did you have to go and tell him all this horrible things just so he’d leave? Why not tell him you’re proud of him, and ENCOURAGE HIM to take the job, ENSURE that it’ll work out between you? But nooooo, Mr. Red Flag had to go and break his heart cause he lacks basic decency and human empathy, only for Mhok, bless his heart, to come back after three years AND FOR SOME REASON, still manage to be in love with this awful person. And he tells him no? Break his heart all over again only for Mhok to have enough emotional intelligence for the both of them to actually come back after YOU GAVE UP ON SEARCHING FOR HIM AT THE AIRPORT LIKE A WEAK MEDIOCRE BI— ugh. If I were Mhok I’d gone and kicked his sorry ass and married a handsome Hawaiian.

Okay.

Also Day only coming to his senses after his mother tells him THE MOST OBVIOUS THING THERE IS.

“Oh Mother what was that? Loving means taking risks? It’s all about trust? and communication? Oh my, that would have never crossed my mind because I am such an idiot. Thank you mom I’ll go look for the love of my life now because you told me so”

like seriously what is up with these boys and their mommy issues? I swear the exact same thing happened in Hidden Agenda. Bro.

I love P’Aof, and his work. Loved Bad Buddy, loved Moonlight Chicken. I had super high expectations of this and, overall, the show is good. But I simply did not enjoy it as much as I thought I would, and it’s all because I couldn’t sympathize with one of the main characters.

In conclusion:

Fluff you Day, you do not deserve Mhok. sorry p’Aof I love you and will continue to support you until the very end.

oof. I needed to rant this out. don’t yell at me please I cry easily.

peace out!

#last twlight the series #bl series #thai bl series #thaibl #thailand #thai bl #thai bl drama #thai drama #thai series #mhokday #mhok x day #mhok last twilight #im very sorry about this but It needed to be said #metapost #meta post #my meta #my writing #last twilight

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loneheroofironjustice · 1 year

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The Faker is NOT a Faker

One of the most well known and iconic nicknames for EMIYA is "Faker" referring to the fact that through his Reality Marble's ability to copy and forge the weapons and noble phantasms of other heroes, along with the fact that even his ideal is borrowed from someone else, the dream to be a Hero of Justice. So yeah, him being called a faker among the other Servants is pretty fitting... but at the same time, he is also the least fake among the heroes

Because if you were to dig deeper into him, and truly understand how his power works, and who he truly is, he isn't exactly what he may seem at first

Because he is pretty much the only hero, the only Servant out of every other, to be true to himself. And while every other Servant is a fake

Now why do I say this?

Well, for those who don't know, one must understand what a Heroic Spirit and Servant is.

Now at face value, both Heroic Spirits and Servants are the same, well that isn't exactly true, they are similar and tend to overlap. But are still not the same

A Servant is just a container that is used as a vessel, a medium for the living (ie. The Master who summons the Servant) to perform a specific role, ala the Servant Classes

While the Heroic Spirit on the other hand, is the personification of the Hero's Legends, Myths, and ideals

Now why is it important to know these. well for one thing. It helps explains as to why we have scenes like this

This is the reason why this scene, and other similar scenarios happen in Fate, because I've seen a lot of misconception that the Servants are weaker than they were at life. And that the flesh and blood heroes are stronger. And to that claim, it is false. Because a Servant IS stronger, it is just that, they are only strong against most humans and magi, but a servant would still absolutely rekt you.

But even so, like what was previously mentioned, A Servant is just the container vessel that a Master (usually Human) can use other similarily weak threats. But the Heroic Spirit themselves are stronger.

To put it simply, the Servant is the fragment, or a single aspect of that Hero, while the Heroic Spirit is the Hero entirely, along with any associated legends of them

So to help better clarify the power scaling between I'll show you. First would be the power scaling of usually human heroes (example: Artoria/Arthur, Beowulf, Sasaki Kojiro, Sherlock, Da Vinci, Medusa, Jeanne)

The Hero (Flesh and Blood/Alive) is weak to The Servant (The Container holding a fragment of that hero) is absolutely destroyed by The Heroic Spirit (The Hero in their entirety, along with all the Legends and Ideals of them)

This is the true power scaling, it is for that reason why some of the Servants seems weak, because they are just in a fraction of their entire power.

But of course there is an alternative case, (Referring to: Gilgamesh, Heracles, Cu Chulainn, Ishtar, Altera etc.) These heroes are examples in where the real life versions of them are definitely stronger than their Servant counterparts. This is true case for usually divine attributed or earth attributed heroes in general. In where as they become servants, they had to weaken themselves in order to be summoned. Think of it like trying to fill a glass of water, Servants, like King Arthur, Beowulf, Blackbeard, Tomoe Gozen, Nagao Kagetora, Sherlock Holmes, Medea, and Lancelot are powerful and strong, but the volume of their strength and being isn't too overwhelming that you can generally get most of them fit into the glass

But more higher tier heroes like Gilgamesh, and Heracles are like vast oceans, they are so powerful, their very beings so deep, that when trying to have them fit into the glass, you end up losing the vast majority of their power due to overflow

So in a most likely scenario, these higher tier heroes would absolutely dominate their Servant counterparts in a fight

Think of it like this

The Servant (a FRAGMENT of the Hero) gets REKT by The Hero (The Flesh and Blood) still gets dominated by The Heroic Spirit (All the Legends of the Hero and their entirety)

Now why does the Heroic Spirit still beats them if I say that they beat the Servant. Well here is where I clear the misconception of Servants and Heroic Spirits

The Servant is just a container holding a fragment of a Hero's power and being, relative enough in strength that they don't overwhelm their human master, but not weak enough that they can't defend themselves

The Heroic Spirit of a hero on the other hand, is not just the Hero, but also their Ideals, myths, and legends given form

What that means is that they are pretty much boosted from those legends, and gives them abilities and powers that they themselves never possessed in life. like take Sigurd for example

Now, for an ancient norse hero, his armour doesn't really look exactly how a norse warrior should. And well, that because he isn't wearing what is supposed to be a piece of nordic armour. In the lore, it is exaplained that the armour he wears is not from his time, but given to him as a servant. Now this isn't the first time a Hero was modified/given something that wasn't theirs in the first place.

Another good example would be Caesar, now I ain't much of an archeologist to point this out. But I am pretty sure the Romans didn't invented, nor worn a suit and tie in their days

So why they, and also other Servants wear other out of time outfits? (I don't have the time to post images of every Hero who wears an outfit that doesn't match their time period, so here is a quick list off of some: Cu Chulainn, Medusa, Beowulf, Artoria, Lancelot, Cleopatra, Kintoki, and several others I can't think of now) Well one of main reasons they wear such outfits is because it is due to the world's perception of them, like when people think of Gaius Julius Caesar himself, they must've imagined some sort of authoritarian general who can lead armies and earn the respect of the people. As such, he wears a red suit and tie, for suits are usually thought of to be worn by people of authority for formal purposes, such as your boss in your mega corporation, or a general in a US army. This makes sense, because Julius is thought as the greatest Emperor that Rome ever had, that many people even now seem him as a great figure (Shame FGO made him to be a joke)

But how does that explain him wearing that outfit in his life? Well it doesn't it only explains why he looks like that as a Servant/Heroic Spirit.

So with that knowledge, you can guess that not only the hero's outfits had been changed because of the hero's fame and reputation. But even their powers and abilities and tools were also changed because of this

Like literally. A Noble Phantasm is not just the trump card of a Hero, it is not just their special ultimate move. But is also their ideals, dreams, hopes, despairs, and legends given physical form.

Like take the Gae Bolg for example.

For those unaware, which I highly doubt, The Gae Bolg is a Noble Phantasm with two functions, a Thrust form, and a Thrown form.

Pretty cool right. Yet except there is a detail that many people may have forgotten about it. It's that originally, the Gae Bolg only had 1 mode, the thrust form, the ability of it reversing cause and effect to always strike the heart. The thrown form on the other hand is basically more attributed to be Cu's and Cu's alone,

Now how did the Gae Bolg got influenced by Cu? Well, the thrown form is actually a crystallization of Cu taking on the entire army Connacht by himself, day in and day out, he single handedly destroyed Medb's countless soldiers, killing them all by himself, this reputation was so great that after being immortalized in the Throne of Heroes, Gae Bolg gained it's 2nd function "Gae Bolg: Soaring Spear That Strikes With Death" if Gae Bolg thrust is more so Scathach's np, then Gae Bolg thrown is Cu's

Now for another example, but not involving Noble Phantasms but with the Servant's skills. Let's use Cu again for this

One of Cu's most notable skills is Battle Continuation, which is a skill that most heroes possess, the skill itself is a crystalization of Cu's undaunting will and resolve, from again fighting entire armies by himself, but also most notably, is also in reference to his dying moments, in where he continues to stand despite fatal wounds, continuing to fight off the entire army of Connacht on bloody legs, with nothing but his own intestines strapping him to a rock to prevent his dying body to fall.

Another good example that isn't Cu is Lancelot. In his Berserker form, he famously has the Noble phantasm Knight of Owner, he also possess it as a skill as a Saber

Now I may not be a historian, but I am pretty sure that medieval knights can't use various firearms or operate modern fighter aircraft, but he has them anyway because it is based off of the story in where he was unarmed and needed to defend himself, so he took a branch and murdered his attacker with that tree branch alone. This is then further expanded as where he can just use pretty much anything as a weapon, from a metal pole, an SMG, to a fighter jet

And as such, as a Servant, he was granted the Battle Continuation skill for this

So with that all being said. How does all of this, the Heroes wearing clothes that are not theirs, to their very powers and abilities

Well, it is because it helps further my point that every other hero in the Throne of Heroes are ironically enough, the true fakers, whilst EMIYA is the only hero who is true to himself

Why you may ask? Well it is because of the fact that every single hero other than EMIYA are backed by their legends and myths

But not EMIYA

Like literally, from them either being Servants, a fragment or aspect of who they are, to a Heroic Spirit, the fame/infamy of a hero

Literally from their own looks, abilities, even down to their very identities is just based off their legends

Like many of their abilities, designs, and tools are either just based off of reputation, their fame, any rumours of them, supposed mythological heritages, cultural or historical impacts, or just straight up bs myths of them

Even Gilgamesh isn't safe from this, the King of Heroes, despite his pride in being the original, he too is a fake. The real Gilgamesh didn't had wealth magically appear before him (Only Heroic Spirit Gil), he didn't had a vault that contained every single np that man had (Only Heroic Spirit Gil) A lot of Gil's abilities are more so derived from the myths and reputation of him, but the real life Gilgamesh never had those, only his Heroic Spirit and Servant counterparts did. So yeah

they were all fakes

But not EMIYA

This is where the irony of it all comes to

Despite being "The Faker" EMIYA is ironically the only one who is genuine, he is the only hero who is the Truest to who he is

Like EMIYA's ability to perfectly replicate the abilities and weapons of others isn't bs, his red shroud and black body armour isn't an arbitrarily applied symbol assigned to him by the people of the world, his clairvoyance to see at great distances isn't just a class ability given to him by the class system. ALL OF THESE ASPECTS OF EMIYA ARE GENUINELY HIS

There is literally an entire visual novel that explores many of his abilities, several animes and games that showcase as to what he can do

And we seen it all for ourselves, Shirou and Archer's abilities are genuine and true, unlike every other hero's which are merely just based off of legends

EMIYA may be a "Faker" but he is more true than any of the other heroes

TL;DR: EMIYA is the only hero in the Fate Franchise is true to himself, everyone else are actually the real fakes with their abilities and even designs based off of legends and myths

#archer emiya #fate stay night #metapost #emiya #gilgamesh #Gilgamesh fate #cu chulainn #fate series #fate grand order #fate servants #fgo #EMIYA is the truest to himself #Everyone else are the actual fakers #fate/stay night

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bazilisk · 7 months

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I hope that the horniness I see for the various BG3 companions (I'll admit, especially Astarion, he's really the standout for this hope) will get more women, goths and queers into tabletop D&D and multiplayer gaming who weren't into it before. 🎲🧛‍♂️💜💜💜 the bigger the tent, the more fun the party!

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #metapost #astarion #gaymers #women gamers

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s-lycopersicum · 5 months

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Exclusive, Unedited, Never-Before-Seen Footage of the Inside of my Brain

The actions in this video are in no way performed by a professional. Feel free to attempt at home if recreational use of Photoshop for Bocchiposting purposes sounds like a fun time to you.

#in 10x speed #metapost #video

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atlas-hope · 5 months

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AZIRAPHALE'S PLAYLIST (6)

Since I’m joyfully suffering from an immense amount of Good Omens brainrot, I’ve been collecting all of my Thoughts™ regarding the list of songs that Prime gave us before Season 2 came out. Now that these songs (and the events of S2) have been churning around in my brain for a few weeks, I feel like I’m able to put my thoughts into words. This will be a series of posts!

Angeleyes

Oof. OOF. That summarizes most of what I have to say about this song choice. OOF. I’ve had to gather my thoughts together for WEEKS on this song. Before Season 2 was released, this was a pretty quirky and goofy choice of song, given the fact that it’s a peppy Europop song (and Aziraphale is not the half of the ineffable duo who is known for their striking eyes). AFTER Season 2 was released, this song choice is UNNERVING (and more than a little painful).

A lot of the verses don’t seem to directly apply to Aziraphale, like the ones below:

Last night, I was taking a walk along the river, And I saw him together with a young girl. And the look that he gave her made me shiver, 'Cause he always used to look at me that way. Then I thought maybe I should walk right up to her and say, "Ah-ha-ha, it's a game he likes to play."

Do I think Aziraphale will show up with a new best friend/romantic interest in Season 3? Will Crowley have to witness the angel bestowing his affections upon another? NO, I don’t think so. That’s why I don’t think these verses are meant to directly apply to Aziraphale.

HOWEVER, I have a small theory. If you stretch the metaphor a bit, the lyrics appear to connote that Aziraphale is more duplicitous than he seems.

Let me explain! After the ending of Season 2, we could be tempted to immediately assume that Crowley has the role of the singer in this song. After all, Aziraphale seems to have performed an immense betrayal. No matter his good intentions, he’s left Crowley on the Earth alone.

I’m here to suggest that the singer COULD be someone else, in this verse specifically. Could the singer be the personification of Heaven's opinion of Aziraphale? He’s certainly infamous Upstairs. Even Muriel, a 37th Order Scrivener, knew who “the Traitor” was, and about his relationship with “the Demon.” I’m saying that there might be a certain amount of mythology around Aziraphale and Crowley up in Heaven, post-ApocaNope. After all those years of fooling the heavenly host, there has to be a great number of angels that gawp down at the ineffable duo’s relationship, marveling at the deception that they had managed.

That being said, I DO believe Crowley is the only feasible singer for these next lines:

Look into his angel eyes, One look and you're hypnotized! He'll take your heart and you must pay the price. Look into his angel eyes, You'll think you're in paradise! And one day you'll find out he wears a disguise. Don't look too deep into those angel eyes.

Need I say any more? This face says it all:

Anyways, back to the lyrics.

Sometimes when I'm lonely, I sit and think about him. And it hurts to remember all the good times, When I thought I could never live without him. And I wonder, does it have to be the same, Every time? When I see him, will it bring back all the pain? Ah-ha-ha, how can I forget that name?

I believe that we will see the ineffable duo mourning the demise of their relationship in Season 3, on both sides. I can’t wait to see what will happen when they finally see each other again. It’s definitely bound to be painful.

On a lighter note, let me reiterate that I still think it’s utterly hilarious that a disco Europop song was put on Aziraphale’s playlist. Somehow, even though I didn’t expect it to, it totally fits his vibe.

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#good omens #aziraphale #good omens 2 #crowley #metapost #good omens 2 spoilers

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writeinspiration · 1 year

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Hi there!!

I am BACK!!

I have had some very frustrating and odd mental barriers these last several years.

One of those is that my dad died in 2020. My family has always spent a lot of time with each other, so it’s been an incredibly difficult adjustment period.

It also didn’t help that I began grieving years before his passing. I’ve basically been in a tornado of suffering since 2016. There have been easier patches here and there, but the barriers are slow to come down. So, that’s a work in progress.

I’m really trying to start living my life again. Very few people have made the effort to reach out to me after I didn’t respond to them through my grief. I can’t blame them.

But that’s why I’d like to give a MASSIVE shout-out to @jfictitional for regularly tagging me in posts meant to cheer me up and let me know that I was being thought about.

I cannot understate how thoughtful that has been. It really means a lot to me. So, THANK YOU, jfictitional, for believing in me and thinking about me when no one has. I’m literally crying as I write this.

But that’s enough about my feelings for the moment.

Something else that slowed down my ability to post is that I had my fingers in too many pies. (Is that a phrase? I sure hope so.)

One exciting development is that I got a job working with a small publisher. It’s basically contract work, so it allows me time to do my own writing and to spend time with my loved ones. In addition, I’m resuming doing freelance editing because I finally have the willpower to do so.

Regardless of my outside work, I fell into a trap many other bloggers have: the second I decided to try making a book of my best content, I fell off the face of the planet (I’m looking at you, @textfromdog).

Thus, I need to get back to my roots. It needs to be fun again. While I don’t know what exactly this will entail for all of you, I am just looking forward to this being something for fun that doesn’t have any pressure attached to it.

Well, I started this blog roughly a million years ago. If you’re still around, THANK YOU!!!!! You are amazing, and I salute you.

So, welcome back to “Why Aren’t You Writing?” Thanks for reading, and I love you so much. You are so valuable and awesome and loved.

And if you need a sign to stay alive, here it is. Sending all my love to each and every one of you.

#writeinspiration #writing community #metapost #death mention #update #tw: death mention #I'm BACK #also I'm learning to bake!!#I'm gonna finish all my books!!#I'm actually writing ROMANCE #not where I thought I'd go haha #my boyfriend has a DOG now #I can't stop capitalizing important words but I'm not sorry #life is looking up?#I hope?#jfictitional #life the universe and everything

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exilley · 1 year

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i am back with more utena thoughts... specifically about the meaning of the orange, yellow, and green roses because they're very unclear in contrast to red, blue, pink, and white. butttttt uhmm so i think orange is supposed to symbolize romantic love, yellow is supposed to be affection, joy, or idolization, and green is about harmony or balance between identity (the self) and others (predominantly friendships and romances)

probably the most damning evidence i have for my interpretation of the color symbolism for orange is it being almost exclusively related to Juri and her deal with not wanting to confront her feelings for Shiori; also, in scenes where romantic love is implied or a strong thematic focal point, the lighting is washed out in orange.

yellow is The Nanami Color, which comes with her whole thing with wanting emotional validation and acceptance from (mainly) her brother as well as her peers. also very notably, in a specific moment in eps 13(? idk it was at the end of the Student Council saga though) Utena is shown experiencing flashbacks of Anthy where the frames are bordered in yellow. like hmmmm.... because in the final duel, as she reaches out to Anthy to pull her out of her coffin, she says “You have no idea how happy I was with you”..... HMMMMMM....

green is the color that occurs least often in the series and probably for good reason, since RGU's whole thing is about how unrealistic constructs of identity and expectations attached to them exist to serve a dysfunctional hegemony that alienates everyone who doesn't neatly fit into boxes and can only cause self-fulfilling prophecies for those that are in power. Saionji's character comes up once again as a parallel and foil to Anthy in this respect: he was presented the notion of a fantastical, "revolutionized" ideal about the world, had it immediately shot down, and henceforth submits himself to a hierarchy in which he'll never be able to realize his full self as an individual whose existence is condemned and rejected by the very system he's committed himself to enabling (if you go the queer reading route! which i am personally a big fan of). in short, something something Saionji forces himself to play a role for Touga because he both admires and detests what he represents and projects his own insecurities onto Anthy which ties into the greater message about how nonconformity is inextricably linked to conformity and can only be understood within the confines of assimilation.

#rgu #sku #rgu meta #sku meta #revolutionary girl utena #shoujo kakumei utena #rgu analysis #sku analysis #rgu symbolism #sku symbolism #Codeword: Revolution #man. there's just no end to this #one of these days i'm gonna write a whole ass dissertation on Saionji and why he's actually the most tragic character in the series #but Miki and Kozue are my favorites lol #metapost #exilley's diary

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o-the-mts · 4 months

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50 for the Fifties

I turned 50 about 7 weeks ago, but never got around to posting my list of 50 things I want to do during my fifties. So instead of listing my New Year’s Resolutions today, I’m going to list my goals for the next ten years! Some of these items are vague and pretty easy, but cut me some slack, there are 50 of them! There are also some items copied from my 40 for the Forties list either because I…

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#birthday #Metapost #Resolutions #wishlist

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tainbocuailnge · 2 months

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i watched fight club today. really not hard to see how this became such a cultural mainstay. i feel like the opening sections before tyler even shows up are possibly even stronger than the rest of it, this setup of this guy with his cushy office job and his pleasantly furnished apartment being so chronically unfulfilled in his picture perfect life that he ends up visiting support groups for the terminally ill to vicariously get access to a framework through which he's allowed to lament his life, but even within these support groups everyone's lament has to adhere to a certain safe image, the narrator fucking hates marla for doing the exact same thing as him because she's not even pretending to go along with the image of beautiful lament despite her being extremely suicidal and just as much in need of support, and when chloe complains about her struggle to get laid now that she's consigned to a beautiful tragic cancer death she is quickly pulled away from the microphone. everyone on screen is excruciatingly unfulfilled because so much as voicing your desires outside very rigidly defined frameworks of acceptability is severely frowned upon.

it's extremely obvious why the men who join fight club are drawn to the allure of a framework through which they're allowed to desire and obtain the experiences of the flesh. all of tyler's crimes involve the taboo of the flesh somehow. splicing porn frames into movies. pissing and nutting into the food he's serving. stealing liposuction clinic fat to make soap and explosives. and of course starting underground fight rings. because the physical is inherently transgressive to these allowed frameworks of success and lament. when tyler lists the rules of fight club all the men present giggle at "no more than two guys per fight" "no more than one fight at a time" because just the fact that they're all here gathering as unfulfilled men indulging in the taboo of high impact physical contact gives everything a (homo)sexual angle that they have to laugh off. because even here in their transgressive taboo secret club they have to adhere to what is allowed! they're not gay. they're manly men who want to fuck women. they are deeply unfulfilled and deeply desperate for a place to belong among other men. they are simply exchanging one rigid framework for another.

it's no coincidence that the first support group the narrator goes to is for testicular cancer either, all these men crying about how losing their balls ruined their lives not because they almost died but because their wives divorced them for not being able to impregnate them anymore, because it destroyed their masculinity and thus their value as human beings, and especially bob who used to be an accomplished bodybuilder but needing to get his balls removed lead to hormonal imbalances that lead to breast growth and now this once masculine ideal is nobody anymore because he's no longer a proper man. he's the only one in tyler's army who gets to have a name.

like specifically bob and sophie really stand out to me as very bold statements especially considering when this movie was made and also very clear signs of what its trying to say here. the extreme social and physical alienation of modern consumerist society and the way it intersects with harmful ideas of masculinity to create a genre of extremely volatile reactionary asshole. and also the fact that the reason the narrator even ended up going to this support group is because his doctor was calling him a fucking pansy for not just powering through his insomnia and telling him to have a look at these tragically emasculated men if he wants to see what's really worth pitying. and having your balls cut off repeatedly being used as the worst threat you could possibly make to a man in this movie because being emasculated is worse than death.

tyler constantly tells the narrator he needs to be prepared to die if he wants to be free, he needs to lose everything and destroy everything if he wants to become able to do whatever he wants, but it's only after the narrator kills himself -> kills tyler and the ideal of masculinity tyler represents that he's actually able to desire something without being told what to desire. the narrator doesn't know what he wants and can't tell tyler what he wants when tyler demands to know, because being tyler isn't actually what he wants once it becomes clear to him where that ideology will lead, but as long as tyler is looming over him as his concept of the ideal (masculine) self he still can't be or even conceptualise his actual fulfilled self. because tyler is taking up all his brainspace to be nothing but a volatile reactionary asshole at the center of a death cult. it's the least masculine man in the movie who gets to be named, martyred even, in the pursuit of tyler's masculinity, and he's named because the narrator realizes he cannot abide tyler's ideal of masculinity. anyway. good movie.

#anyway i love cuchulainn #metapost

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