#neither before nor after

[yuwuta]

If megumi asked uzhsjdhshd omg I totally see it tbh him wanting you, but I don't think megumi would ever ask yuuji to share you, in any type of way at all. (not trying to push my own hc here!!) I feel like yuuji himself would be the one asking megumi. Yuuji knows that he's yours just as much as he knows you're his. And he loves you too much, a lot, it's purest type of love he has ever felt for anyone. And megumi is his best friend, he loves him just as much, right? Yes, not the same love between you and him ofc but yes. And I have no idea what they were doing but yuuji's just says, kind of out of the blue, that he'd let megumi fuck you. The reason being exactly cause he knows you're his, and you're just so so good that he needs to have someone to talk to (about you and always so respectfully) and who better that his best friend?

you’re opening the pandora’s box that is itfs + reader…. god….. 

okok i agree. if you’re dating yuuji, megumi would never ask, yuuji would be the one to bring all three of you together. definitely because he loves you and you’re his, and he loves megumi too, so it just makes sense that his two favorite people also get to have each other—but also, yuuji can tell megumi likes you, and he can tell you think megumi is attractive and since yuuji’s so nice, what kinder thing to do than to set you two up so he can watch (: he definitely enjoys being the mediator, also enjoys the somewhat awkward air between you and megumi, how yeah, maybe it’s a little taboo that the two of you are about to make out while you’re boyfriend watches, but yuuji likes that too… also he likes knowing that you both like him. like how lucky is he that his best friend and his girlfriend adore him so much :(( you two together makes so much sense in his head, because he talks to megumi about you, and he talks to you about megumi, and now, he can just pour all his love for both of you out at the same time

but also…. i’d like to think that yuuji’s maybe not so nice when it’s the other way around—when he and megumi get together first, and you’re megumi’s best friend. he’s not mean, but he does like to tease... how naughty of megumi to ask out yuuji knowing he’s still got a crush on you, and god does yuuji like to tease him about it :/ jerks him off and taunts about how he knows megumi’s dirty little secret—that he’s in love with his best friend and fantasizes not just about having you, but about watching his own boyfriend fuck you too… 

yuuji knows megumi would take his feelings for you to the grave if he could (he’d have done the same with his feelings for yuuji if yuuji wasn’t the one to ask him out), but where’s the fun in that! you and megumi are sooo cute together after all, so yuuji doesn’t mind trying to get you two to confess to each other too. uses his proximity to megumi to get closer to you, takes advantage of his bubbly disposition to be physically affectionate with you, uses megumi’s feelings to his advantage to tease, to wink, to smirk whenever you and yuuji hug a little longer, when he texts megumi that he’s meeting up with you for lunch, when he gives you his jacket and doesn’t ask for it back… there’s so much fun in watching megumi blush and whine and get off at the thought of his best friend and his boyfriend together. and the thing is, yuuji genuinely does like you, too, he sees what megumi sees in you, and he thinks megumi is crazy to have not asked you out before, but he supposes everything happens for a reason, because now, this way, yuuji gets to be there and watch it all happen under his guidance. there’s something about the power, about being the bridge between you two even though you and megumi have known each other for much longer, about being in control of a dynamic that could have, but wouldn’t exist without him…

#anonymous #can u tell... ive thought about this before.... GODD #the locked folder in my notes app dedicated to itfs + reader..... maybe she will see the light of day after all LOL #my itfs heart.... anon u dont know what you've done.............. #also the divide between the way the 3 of u come together is like.... #if ur with yuuji its just like.... hes got too much love for either one of u #and even when he gets to share u with megumi its not enough he loves u both and there's no real proper way to ever fully share or express i #but watching u two fuck is about as close as it gets to feeling like all his love is coming full circle #but the other way... when hes with megumi and can see that megumi still wants u and then yuuji gets to know u and wants u himself.... #now h'es got too much power and its power that neither u nor megumi truly see or understand until ur all in bed together #which is crazy bc in theory u and megumi should be stronger should know each other better should be the two friends sharing him #but it's not. it's yuuji who brought u three together and it's yuuji that knew about ur feelings for each other before u and megumi did #and in some weird twisted way u owe it to him and he definitely likes to reap his rewards #and even when u three are together he doesn't stop teasing... #sometimes he makes megumi be meaner to u... coaxes him into thinking he should teach u a lesson for never being able to see his feelings #u owe it to ur best friend to show him how much u love him dont u.... #but then other days he'll turn it around... make u the baby and soothe ur tears... #because its only fair u take the both of them bc they love u sooooo much they just wanna be good to u #but also how fun is it for yuuji to remind you that megumi knew he liked u and still asked him out... maybe u should want revenge for that #maybe u take it out on megumi maybe u take it out on yuuji idkidkidk #anyway... #itafushi x reader #yuuji x reader #megumi x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #yuuji.ask

[dailypearldoodles]

Day 534

Yup it's more fma au aha

Decided to go ahead with the idea that Pearl was given a Philosopher's Stone during Ishval, thus also gaining the title The Red Pearl Alchemist for a short time. The stone is returned after the war ends, but later she finds it again in the Fifth Laboratory with Gem

#daily pearl doodles #pearlescentmoon #fullmetal alchemist #hermitcraft #mod morph #''Before you condemn me #may I remind you that even without the stone your flames took the most lives #Hero of Ishval?'' #“Neither I nor Kimblee had you beat.” #yup i started writing stuff #i didnt expect to end up with a full scene of Gem's team talking to Roy lmao #“...the Lieutenant Colonel stood next to me in the awards ceremony after Ishval.” #roy talking about pearl here #i love my war criminals <3 #gem's team meets roy proper after ed and al leave for the north #so like when roy's office is all empty lol #anyways the fma brainrot train continues to brainrot

[tanoraqui]

a fascinating, impactful thing about Elrond and Elros’s Choices to be Elf and Man respectively is that no way did they not start out Pretty Fucking Codependent. Since the age of 6, it’s been just the two of them surrounded by kinslayers, and then just the two of them surrounded by Gil-galad’s people and the Host of the West who don’t understand their many, many complicated feelings about the kinslayers. Like their parents before them, they are the only two half-elves alive in the world, completely alone but for each other. And their primary models for healthy relationships are Elwing “I will not let you suffer the wrath of the Valar alone” Dioriel, Eärendil “[I’m exhausted and want to leave but] My wife may Choose for both of us - immortality? Alright, babe” Tuorion, and Maglor “this is a terrible idea but I will not let you take further blood on your hands and Eternal Darkness on your soul alone” Fëanorion. There’s no way for them to have not been Pretty Fucking Codependent!

Yet still, still, for the love of boldness and fortitude and the mystery beyond the edge of the world, Elros chose to be a mortal Man; and for the love of wisdom and grace and the beauty of the world, Elrond chose to be an Elf forever in Arda; and as price, they both accepted that they would be sundered from one another until the end of all known time.

#elrond #elros #[softly but with fervor] i mean FUCK #the silmarillion #lotr #peredhil #obv reasons for choosing are written here for poetry more than character analysis BUT we do VERY MUCH in this house #hold to the idea that neither elrond nor elros chose out of anything like 'well my experience with elves has thus far sucked' #nor even 'i feel in love with someone' #but rather out of understanding eagerness and truly matched temperaments for their respective paths #we also hold that elrond made it like 5 years M A X I M U M in being-built lindon before gil-galad was like 'do you wanna just...go...' #and elrond was like 'YES THANK YOU it's not permanent if i don't go MORE west right?' and immediately built and sailed a boat to numenor #and in general split much of his time between the shores until elros's death and even after (though much less so) #was this supposed to be what they did? [wobbles hand] ehhhh... #was ulmo clearly tacitly endorsing it? yeah #elrond carefully never sailed off the western coast of the island it was fine. he was just visiting

[theoryofwhatnow]

crafting the game

(this has been in my drafts for ages)

#i've been thinking about the boys game a lot. #the event at the end of the movie that most of us first recognized as the cycle #(or at least most of whom i've interacted with after first finishing the film) #I'm gonna be honest this all started because i was making an edit #but that's neither here nor there. #Essentially i was confused about *the game* #and was wondering whether nigel won or lost before i realized i was looking at it all wrong #duh #Nigel was talking about the creation of the game that he would contribute to #not how it's played #which only became glaringly obvious to me after i'd sat there with my thoughts for almost a half hour #(give me a break i'm not stupid i've just had a rough few weeks) #Everybody played their part perfectly the schools order begins to fall apart #(alex headmaster's son leaves. nigel grandmaster's son dead alongside his parents. etc.) #the valiant hero forsakes the religious organization (McKenzie) #and everyone else takes their place unknowingly simply through existing. #Alex finds another boy and so it begins. #Finally out of death grief suffering and ruined sanity; the game starts but we don't ever see it. #start with a Jack and then fabricate the game #like minds #nigel colbie #alex forbes #murderous intent

[dirtytransmasc]

mild rant, cause hotd TikTok is insufferable.

so I saw an edit, with the scene of Viserys on his death bed, calling Rhaenyra his only child...

these were some of the comments...

how dense do people have to be to say this shit, as if the abuse/neglect Aegon, Helaena, Aemond (and Dearon) faced, is the reason they are the way that they are????

aegon turned to his cups so young because he had to face the fact that his father didn't love him, his mother had... complicated feelings towards him (he was her first, born of marital rape that destroyed her life and childhood, and she loved him no doubt, but part of her hated what he represented in her life. all of which is Viserys and Otto's fault). not to mention the abuse he faced from Viserys and Otto (focus on Otto, cause he did what he wanted, since Viserys wasn't around enough to thoroughly abuse his son himself and wouldn't punish Otto for doing so). his drinking and need to self destruct to escape a life he doesn't want, turned him into the destructive, drunken bastard he is.

aemond was permanently maimed, an injury that very well could have killed him or hindered him greatly in life, and was ignored by his father, who then supported such an obvious lie instead of protecting his own son (aka, treating the greens and the blacks as equals and not playing favorites, they're aren't asking for miracles they asking for bare minimum). he suffered so greatly and his father couldn't give less of a shit. so on top of everything else, he had this anger boiling in his chest for years and years, stoked by his father's willing negligence. not to mention the fear it cause his mother (who was being manipulated by Otto) that Rhaenyra truly was a threat to his livelihood, which only targeted his anger.

Helaena, on a direct/surface level, was the best off, in terms of her father, but the ripple effect he caused on her life and those around her caused her to be married to her brother, who she didn't love, who didn't live her, and brought her suffering to some degree. it was the war Viserys practically created (tell me he didn't, I dare you) that sent her to madness (amongst other things *ahem* blood and cheese).

like, this man destroyed his children, directly or not, everything he did broke them down and apart, until he died, leaving them with a war that would end them all. his actions made them (Aegon and Aemond) into the people they were, but of course, that doesn't matter, apparently.

#gonna flip my shit #you cant hate the victims and then love/support their abuser #that logically does not make any fucking sense #and before anyone says anything #no I dont not hate rhaenyra/the blacks #they are morally complex and are neither entirely good nor bad #But if I were to choose one said to defend and deem the most 'right' I'm picking the greens and I will fight and die on this hill #also #yes I know what aegon did #no I do not support it/him (after the fact) #what I will say is #I support him up until that point with my whole chest AND acknowledge that he could have been different had his life not sucked so bad #also also #I acknowledge that the whole plotline of Aegon being evil was just to make the greens look worse for the show #so my feelings torwards aegon are complicated and messy #but I will always defend him in terms if the treatment he recieved frim Viserys #hotd #aegon targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #aemond targaryen #helaena targaryen #alicent hightower #anti viserys i targaryen #I want this mans head on a stick #anti otto hightower #I wish this mans desth was 10x more painful #lukewarm feelings towards the blacks.... thats all im gonna say #pro team green

[compacflt]

hey! i was just going through your blog, and i saw a post about ice&carole and mav&goose. i looked a bit more but i couldn't find a post about your take on mav and goose's relationship, so i wanted to ask what it was. if you have answered this, i'm sorry about asking you again. imo i think what they had was wayy deeper than friendship but complex and probably not romantic, but again, i just wanted to know your thoughts on it.

thank you! and this blog has probably been one of the best finds i have ever come across on tumblr, i'll be sad to see you go.

yeah, i was really trying to be suave and subtle and mysterious about it with this parallel

like, you should be able to figure it out for yourself.

but luckily for you i looooove beating dead horses. to a problematic degree.

the full story of my vision of mavgoose (moose?) is in the completed draft of the extras that are coming out on Saturday. about halfway through. But i want to bring it back to the internal craft-of-writing debate i brought up yesterday—my inability to summarize, or to cut superfluous sections that don’t really matter.

I’ll stick it under the cut for spoiler reasons, but i wanna show the simple first draft of this scene versus the complicated, heavier final draft. And I want to ask any of you, if you’re interested—as a reader, which is more impactful? which should i end up publishing?

the simple first draft:

then i kept turning it in my head thinking of different ways to edit it to say something slightly different, to get a little more specific, coming up with things to add, and ended up adding like five extra paragraphs. which is this:

about 1/4 of the final draft (by which i mean, this is about 1/4 of the whole final discussion scene, but the goosemav-specific content only goes on for about another graf [omitted bc spoilers]):

(so to answer your ask explicitly, i actually don’t think they were anything deeper than good friends. imo there’s no evidence that they were anything deeper than good friends, especially with maverick blowing goose/goose’s wishes off soooo many times [‘she’s lost that lovin feelin;’ volleyball; refusing to do the responsible thing at least twice even after goose tells him it puts his & his family’s livelihoods at risk…bro all he does is blow off goose]. see me bitching in the tags for more on this)

obviously in my head the complicated in-depth version ⬆️ is the True version, the version of events that really Happened. i think the writing is in some spots much more compelling. But it just doesn’t make for a particularly good reading experience when it’s surrounded by like 3/4 pages of other discussion of history! sometimes too much of (what i think is) a good thing turns that good thing bad! & this is a major keystone dynamic of my whole series so i just want to get it right, for my own peace of mind. I guess im asking you to be the harsh editor i wish i had sometimes, if ur interested in doing so—this is genuinely a major major problem i have with my writing, i can’t ever just leave well enough alone 😭 please let me know if simpler is better/less is more in this case! do i publish the short vague “the reader fills in the blanks” version or the long boring “here’s EXACTLY how i see it” version?

#crowd sourcing beta readers. let me know. #also. #how many times do i have to say maverick is neither a good person nor a good friend #and the writers of TGM hugely whitewashed and dulled down the original sharpness and thoughtlessness of his character #for the sake of post-50s tom cruise mary-sueifying him #before it sticks? #if it helps you can write out a list of his actions in the original movie. #for instance: > blows off goose to be late to dinner with Charlie anyway #> follows her into the women’s restroom > continues a pattern of dangerous behavior even after #Goose his supposed best friend tells him multiple times it is threatening their jobs #the truck master scene… the locker room scene… the ‘can’t afford to blow this scene’ #and then he does it a FOURTH TIME AND KILLS GOOSE HELLO!!!!! #so much for being a good friend like c’mon!!! #if he REALLY respected goose he would have SHOWN HIS RESPECT FOR GOOSE!!! #i am leaving this blog so out come the hot takes! #movies are also woobifying tom cruise lately! how’s that for a hot take #i genuinely felt insulted by TGM’s sexless passionless soft bokeh-light KIND OF half-sex with Penny. that was insulting. #what happened to the savage bitter kid in 1986 top gun? why is he so soft and toothless? #the only time we see him is in the ‘it’s not the plane it’s the pilot’ ‘EXACTLY’ exchange. THATS maverick. #sorry you know me. TGM is not my favorite. i am extremely cynical about it. #i love the IP but the writing choices in the 2nd movie wrt mav especially make me…. 😵‍💫😵‍💫 #pete maverick mitchell #nick goose bradshaw #mavgoose #you can ignore me bitching but pls don’t ignore my begging for secondary opinions here

[kirby-the-gorb]

#kirby #daily kirby #my art #digital #hal laboratory #nintendo #cats #I am trying to get my cat to associate wearing the harness with getting to go outside and smell things #cuz our other partner is gonna drive me and the cat home since neither she nor I should be put on planes if at all avoidable #so I'd like her to be able to get out of the car with us at rest stops and stretch her little beans and smell stuff #instead of just being in a car or a hotel room for like 3 days #so far she has been very good about not pulling or trying to escape #even when she does not agree with my decision to not walk through the landscaping in socks #(I didn't forget her tail she doesn't have one) #(I know it's after midnight everywhere as far west as NA rn so I do feel the need to clarify this is not a joke) #(I really did take my cat outside just before I drew this) #(there were a lot of slugs and they did not interest her at all)

[labyrynth]

ok so your first problem was assuming mdzs is a story where Good People are Rewarded and Bad People are Punished.

your second problem was assuming that MXTX—who goes out of her way to showcase unresolved, tragic, undeserved endings in all of her works—would ever write a story with such a shallow notion of “deserving.”

the only reason wangxian makes it out unscathed is because they’re literally the protagonists. authorial intent and plot armor ensure their happy ending. that’s it.

#mdzs talk #moi #i mean it also helps that neither wwx nor lwj give a rats ass about the rest of the cultivation world #wwx had already fucked off and lwj was basically doing that too #that man has never given a single shit about politics and maintaining good relationships #like what does it say about you if even jiang cheng is a better politician than you. #mister ‘don’t talk to me before i’ve had my coffee. or after. just don’t fucking talk to me.’ #but yeah wangxian is like oh we helped to create a massive power vacuum and destabilized the entire cultivation world? #ahaha no way!🤪 hey actually can this wait? my husband and i wanna go fuck in the bushes 🥰 #like. lwj that’s YOUR brother that just lost his most significant emotional support of the last decade. #wwx that’s YOUR pseudo nephew whose parental figure you just got killed. #that’s YOUR pseudo nephew who now has to become sect leader at like 15. #but nah they wanna go bang on the side of the road #god forbid they try to clean up some of the gigantic mess they helped to make #and nobody try to argue ‘well but jgy!!’ buh buh buh nothing. jgy cleaned up after himself. #neither wwx nor lwj had ANY personal stake in seeing jgy dead. lwj SHOULD have had a personal stake in keeping him alive actually. #i still think it’s super shitty and hypocritical of lwj to defend wwx so strongly and yet try so hard to condemn jgy in PRIVATE #both wwx and lwj really showed their asses at guanyin ngl. obviously huaisang did too. #like yeah it’s noble and righteous or whatever but like. righteousness was not why lwj defended wwx before. #wangxian stans being self-righteous and hypocritical? with classist double standards? with black and white mentality? #wow! who would have ever guessed?

[agena87]

The second time Wolfgang and Malcolm met; when Mal went to sign up Joy for some art classes. The little girl had already shown some talent for drawing and painting, even at the young age of four, and expressed her desire to learn more to become an artist when she grew up. Mal, being the awesome dad that he is, never refuses her anything (though he tries not to spoil her). When going to meet the art teacher, Malcolm actually didn't know the name of said teacher, he just had been told by Max that there were courses for kids on the week-end at a certain art studio, and that it was the best teacher in town who held them. He was pleasantly surprised to see Wolfgang there, since he had been on his mind since their first meeting at Lucas and Max's wedding. Wolfgang was just as happy to see Malcolm, who he had found quite nice and interesting when they had talked during their first meeting. He was even more happy to see Malcolm wearing a more casual (and quite fitting) outfit (Luna hadn't been at Mal's that day, and hadn't bitch at him for wearing "hobo clothes"). Both men (well, a man and a Wolfie) ended up speaking for two hours while Joy explored the studio. And Mal left with the promise of a future coffee (friendly) date with Wolfie.

#wow i actually edited the hair for once #and i played a lot with blender's proprierites and values #i actually created my first window from scratch (glass and all) for this #i know it's some rather basic shit but i never tried it before #i also got better with the shadows i think (i also played a bit with stuff in blender for this) #anyway #my babies are on the road to looooove (luna who?) #to be fair neither luna nor mal are really happy to date each other #their relationship is more business than anything and had been pushed by both nancy and jacques after mal's wife died #fun fact: joy HATES luna (not 'cause she misses her mom because she doesn't even remember her that much - she was just 3 when her mom died #but because luna is really not the maternal type and don't like children - she's not mean or anything #she just doesn't how to act with a - very opiniated - little kid) #ts4 #sims 4 #ts4 render #render #sims 4 render #sim: wolfgang munch #sim: malcolm landgraab #oc: joy landgraab #story: well met

[13eyond13]

.

#one of the things i find hard to take seriously about some of the lawlight stuff that gives them certain raunchy kinks is just simply that #at the end of the day i think theyre both sort of sheltered and pampered spoiled brats in many ways #like whenever ppl are like talking about lawlight being super into (insert extremely unhygienic/dangerous/humiliating bedroom activity here) #most of the time im just thinking stuff like #'ok neither of them would really be into that because neither of them like pain nor probably have ever done their own laundry before' #like who is going to be washing their sheets for them after that? watari? i sure hope not #imo theyd be much more vanilla than the fandom often portrays em hahaha #lawlight #p

[snixx]

got queerbaited into reading a book by chatgpt. is this rock bottom

#girlblogging.pdf #apparently coding isn't the only thing that thing is ass at. fetching basic information is too #i mean i Wanted to read it anyway and i knew it wasnt queer before. idk why i let chatgpt gaslight me into believing i was making it up #whatever. neither the main character nor her best friend are textually queer or in love with each other. they're both pretty boy crazy tbh #but the mc is giving big aro vibes. like she's so done with her best friend every time she starts talking about men or crushes #also her crush on this guy is giving extremely platonic im not biased i swear #she just throws herself at him because she thinks itd be cool to date her besties crushs bff #so she could feel normal like her #they do have a cute friendship though. mc and the guy. also they start dating like 2 seconds after her bff dies so it's not really romantic #also theres a very cool lesbian who gets more pagetime than the guy and whos friendship with mc is super angsty so #w #its a really good book ok i just went in with really wrong expectations #like a sapphic hiaylm #but every day i grow closer to the great truth of my life that sapphic hiaylm will never exist #and i should stop looking for it and find the beauty in things for their originality and what they are #anyway in this case the lack of sapphicness did not detract from the book at all dont get me wrong #i just found it funny

[singinbluebird]

I need to talk more about my Liu Mingyan transmigratior au actually. Like. Imagine you get transported into your favorite guilty pleasure novel that you write fanfic of every guy having insane hate sex in, and then it becomes cannon that two of them actually DO love eachother and so you just. Continue writing the weirdest “rpf” imaginable.

#I think she would probably drop in after Shen; some point either a bit before or during Binghe’s abyss arc #and neither Shen nor Shang would figure her out until WAY after cannon. #like. they never have a reason to talk to eachother. so why would she ever hear them calling eachother by their fandom infamous nicknames. #and? she gets a hot demon gf? and a cutie pie damsel-turned-badass gf?? #WHAT MORE COULD YOU EVER ASK FOR… #svsss #meow meow meow

[r-osehips]

I have two major predictions for the last two eps of s2 of The Gilded Age.

highly likely but I desperately don’t want it to happen: Bertha and George separate after Bertha finds out that George put his own money into the Met (nbd) and that he lied to her face about doing so (v big deal especially because iirc he lied about it in the SAME SCENE where she said please never conceal anything from me again)

unlikely but I would be delighted: Mrs. Astor, in a desperate bid to win the opera war, promises Bertha that if Bertha lets the Duke go to the opening at the Academy instead of the Met, then Mrs. Astor will marry her daughter off to Larry. but Larry, who has proven headstrong and reckless about love, does not want this. meanwhile Marian, who has already once before attempted to elope, desperately does not want to marry the guy who pressured her via public proposal. Marian and Larry elope.

now, if both these things happen, it could lead to the least likely yet most desired (by me) twist: Bertha and Agnes, united by outrage and loneliness and mutual contempt, have a torrid affair that goes from hatefucking to grudging co-conspirators who respect each other but pretend not to.

#the gilded age #bertha is based on Mrs Vanderbilt who DID get divorced which was a huge scandal and trendsetter #and Bertha loves to set trends scandalously. but Julian….. AT WHAT COST. #then again Robert and Cora on downton made it through ten thousand ups and downs #the downs included Robert being a moron in general AND Robert contributing to Sybil’s death via snobbery about doctors #and I’m gonna assume that George will neither kill Gladys nor become a total loser #so i have some hope that the Russells will eventually pull through. if and when George gets his shit together #but in the meantime it’ll be agony #i ask only that we get one (1) good sex scene each before and after the breakup #and that during the breakup bertha has an affair with Agnes #or with Carrie. or with Mrs Astor. etc. #thank you.

[johanthefriskiestofbits]

oooooo please tell me (who knows nothing on the subject) about orv swap au

hehehe. hehehehehehe. hehehehehehehhehehehhheheheh <- guy who is so normal

the premise of orv swap au (name has yet to be finalized) is this: what if kdj and yjh swapped narrative positions (reader <-> character) but very little else? what if a video game player enters a time loop to save his favorite character from dying over and over again and also to end the apocalypse?

admittedly it's not super fleshed out yet (a lot of the changes this premise would introduce are still not hammered out yet) but here are some points under the cut (novel spoilers ahead!)

orv swap au starts with pro gamer yjh who feels :/ abt his job, but hey, it pays the bills. despite (or maybe because of) his relative popularity as a pro gamer and networking with the agency/sponsors/people to impress, he's kind of isolated in a way that's detrimental, a facade of someone he's not whenever he's on camera

something to play around with is the idea of agency? maybe this yjh doesn't feel like he has any and has his hands tied between the lifestyle and being under public scrutiny and not having enough of a support system to leave everything behind. maybe he doesn't know what else he would even do. maybe he's aimless and drifting with nothing to hold on to.

his favorite video game is what i've been thinking of as World's Hardest To Play Indie Game (not based on difficulty but just on the experience of consuming it) a boring, exposition heavy, player-hostile, poorly designed, slightly buggy mess of a barely-playable game: twsa, a game that was not finished upon release and experiences with sporadic updates every now and then.

the ending tree to this game is so convoluted its insane. also theres no save states so if you die (very likely) u restart babeyyy.

twsa (video game) does have multiple endings, all of which happen when kdj, your main character, dies. some are farther into the apocolypse than others, some paths require meta knowledge of future events or character actions or items or whatever. the "true ending" is either analogous to the original 1863: kdj makes it to the end at the cost of everyone he loves, or hsy's modified 1863: kdj makes himself enemy of the scenario to secure a way out for the kimcom remnants.

there's branches on the choices tree where everyone dies and everything sucks and is bad forever and theres choices to make where kdj gets to make a family and they don't really get to settle down but they can get pretty close to it among the ruins of the apocalypse. through all his testing, yjh finds that these endings are nice but peter out - to get to the end of the apocalypse yjh has to claw his way there inch by painful inch, through betrayal and sacrifice, and he still cant fully get past it

i originally wanted to finagle a yoohankim 3 way swap but i couldn't figure it out. swap aus are a lot easier to work with when they're even numbers, at least to me, so this au features a ysa who is a video game company employee by day and by night she really has become god this time (and also a terrible indie dev). and this is how jungdoksang can still win !!!!

also yjh's coworker from Real Life hsy :) i haven't decided if she's like an employee for the same agency, or if she's someone else in the gaming circles that yjh interacts with sometimes (in my heart theyre in like some sort of discord server together), or something like that but she's around. whatever she does she is twitter cancelled for something. to me.

the only other character swaps are lsk and yma. yma is yjh's estranged sister (in broad strokes there's a vague bad parent situation going on here) (they used to be close until they drifted apart and slowly started hating each other [there is an abyss between them that neither of them can bridge]) (he feels that she betrayed him and threw him under the bus so he left [maybe he gets kicked out]) (she feels that he abandoned her to whatever situation they have going on [he didn't even try to take her with him]) and he has to find her when the apocalypse starts. yjh older sibling to yma gives us a whole different little dynamic to explore from kdj ysk (there's different levels of responsibility and guilt and blame when you're talking siblings that are soooooo interesting to me. sorry that i see any set of siblings and immediately try to figure out how to make them worse)

lsk is kdj's mom who appeared into existence at some point with kdj and they were both just adults. that's weird isn't it. oh well. i guess she can become a transcendent later too for funsies

everyone else stays in the same configuration of Real Person vs Character to me this is a very important aspect

this point has no precedent with the swap, nothing particular that would change to cause this, but it would be so funny if lgy was a little gamer boy who is an avid yjh hater. hates that guy. shows up to competitions to boo him. tunes into yjh's silent no-mic speedrunning streams to mald in chat but yjh +mods don't ban him bc its kinda funny.

anyways the apocalypse starts when yjh and his coworker/fellow gamer hsy are on a train to twitchcon and lgy is also there (also headed to twitchcon) and he brings bugs because he likes them but also to sabotage yjh specifically. its just funny if this happened. you understand

instead of having reader-related skills and abilities, yjh's skills are video game player based! he gets flavor text insight on people, location, and items, things like that. notably, he has the ability to reset, to bring himself back to the beginning of the apocalypse

orv swap proper follows yjh as the Player of the Game (Consumer of the Narrative) who lives hundred of lifetimes in this ruined-world-become-reality "replaying" [read: time looping through] the game to reshape it to save his fave character from self implosion (kdj with no dissociation is very prone to dying. all the time.). to revisit the idea of playing with yjh and the idea of agency, of creation, the only way to get past the apocalypse is to go off the beaten path, to choose options that weren't even there in the game. when in space, at his darkest point, yjh becomes a writer. in this story, at his darkest point, he has to become a creator too

please do not ask me how the epilogues go i dont know how the epilogues go (i don't want to throw yjh back into a train for milennia after he Just went through a thousand resets so i'm sending kdj for that but i havent fully planned how or why)

anyways, hope that helps!!! :)

#orv au #orvswap #i think i will main tag this. just the one tag tho. poorly planned au be upon ye. #orv #orv spoilers #<- for blacklists! #i only realized after creating this au that this is just how p//mmm goes except its videogame themed and hater lgy is there lol #anyways wheres that post that says time loops are about tragedy and theyre about saying i will make this right #and secret third thing time loops are about love #also each individual dynamic for the creater-player-character triangle in this is so interesting to me to explore like #you have the new kdj-yjh one (mostly similar tbh. was the crux of the au after all) which is a fun space to play in #but then you have a brand new kdj-ysa one to work with which is !!!! a writer and her character. a creator and her creation #and then you have ysa-yjh as the creator and her audience of 1!!!!!!! where is yjh that he needs to be saved? how does ysa answer that call #to love to the point of creation.... to tear the world asunder..... to create the worlds most unplayable rpg....... #lets meet again in another life. ysa reaches out toward yjh but cant reach him before she wakes up. cant quite tell him its not his fault #and Dont Even get me Started on yoo sister dynamics ill go insane #because theyre siblings but for a while (and def at the beginning of the story) it hurts to be around each other (its a betrayal #its a pang in your chest its a you were supposed to protect me and you were supposed to love me and i dont even know you anymore) #but also the swap means the 4th wall eats yma and leaves yjh begging for her back ('dont you hate her?' 'shes my little sister' #which is neither agreement nor denial but also both at once) #its ya boi #tango mango #anyways thanks for the ask im very normal about the ask

[dear-nyu]

Mother walks out of her room at 1AM and walks past mine on the way to the bathroom. She stops, briefly blinded by my lights as I let out an awkward "ahahhahahaaaaaa ooooops" and push myself away from my desk as if I'm not perfectly aware of time.

She looks at her watch, sighs, shakes her head disapprovingly and just goes to do her business. The moment her door closes I back at my desk again.

The consequences will be dealt to tomorrow's me.

#1am before a work day neither doing homework nor sleeping #just typing away #can't blame me for it after how suffocating these past few weeks been now can you #i can fuck myself up sometimes a little as a treat #nyu rambles #nyu.txt

[quietwingsinthesky]

2012 me watching spn needs to apologize to Zachariah rn, I hated him so much and for what. He’s just doing his cult job. He’s funny. He beats up Dean because Dean’s so annoying. Tells the Winchesters he wants to fuck their mom right in front of them. Literally a perfect character, no notes.

#been thinking for weeks about that one moment in Lucifer Rising where Dean makes a pop culture reference or something at Cas & Zach #and they both stare at him blankly before Zach turns back to look at Cas like ‘translate? do you speak Dean?’ #and like correct me if I’m wrong but it feels like Zach gets much more pop culture saavy after that scene #which implies!!! THAT HE WENT AND EXPOSED HIMSELF TO HUMAN POP CULTURE!!!! SO THAT DEAN CANT TALK NONSENSE CIRCLES AROUND HIM!!!! #PETTY BITCH. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. #Zachariah begrudgingly watching all the Star Wars films: I’ll learn what the hell is coming out of his mouth if it kills me #this is why he gets to join the nomadverse gang when I get around to writing that #Uriel-Anna-Cas obvious choices to make human and force on a road trip together #but Zachariah is their pathetic skrungly boss and they’re stuck with him #(uriel and vas’s boss anyway. my Anna headcanons are neither here nor there.) #spn #Zachariah spn