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peace-for-levi · 1 year

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golden hour

{sometimes i get ideas for drabbles that aren't long enough to be chapters, or oneshots. this was going to be a side chapter/drabble of morgen, but i didn't like where it was headed so i rewrote it. pls accept my garbage, i wrote this in ~45 mins}

cw: i have projected!!!!!! my abandonment issues onto levi lmao. anxiety, trauma, very slight possessiveness (but not to the point it's unhealthy) references to smut from the night prior. so mdni! finale pt. 1/manga spoilers!!!

w/c: 1201

taglist: @levmada @poisonpeche @jayteacups @happybird16 @theferricfox @sckerman @whattheheckmidoriya @notgoodforlife @anlian-aishang @unadulteratedtreecrusade @nelapanela94 (i honestly forget who's in my taglist??)

Levi Ackerman doesn't know peace. He is a man most acquainted with strife and sacrifice.

The void left in his heart after the Rumbling is gaping and steep. It pulls him into the dark, with little hope of anything good ever happening. Maybe he doesn't deserve it; maybe he isn't meant to have nice things. That's what the cynical side of him says. But then again, cynicism was all he ever had. Negativity, doubt... As a soldier, he always had to err on the side of caution.

So the idea of you laying in his arms, flush to his bare chest, is something so foreign to him. Levi can hardly believe his eyes.

Sunlight filters through the windows, casting rays and lighting up the room. Shining on you, he finally takes you -- and all your wonder -- in and he breathes easy.

He pulls you closer. Where is the next threat? When, even?

This is too good to be true.

You stir in his embrace and he relaxes, allowing you to fidget and stretch as needed. Your dewy and damp hair from last night clings to your forehead. Dirt doesn't repulse him too much anymore, he thinks. Well, not if it's you. He flicks the stray hairs dangling in your eyes away, and blows the rest away gently. Now he sees you.

He gasps when you smile in your hazy state, snuggling closer.

"Mornin'," you sigh.

"Mm." He doesn't mean for it to come across as a grunt. "Good morning. Sleep well?"

The gravelly baritone of his morning voice sends shivers down your spine. "Ohhhhh yeah."

It would be hard not to sleep well after last night, but he will stay on alert. He had his night of fun. Now it's time to get back to business. But what business does he have left? The teashop? It's closed today. Maybe cleaning the kitchen. Oh wait, you did a spring clean of it last night.

He sighs, heavily. It's hard to go from always having a task to do, to nothing at all. He can't lose his edge, it's too soon. It's barely been a few years. If he loses his edge, what happens then? What if you slip through his fingers? What if you realize that your time could be spent elsewhere, fulfilling whatever dreams you may have?

Not that he'd stop you, it's just…

I just don't have anyone else, he thinks, selfishly.

He must stay alert and aware all the time. He gave into desire last night when he could have been doing something more productive. If you continued to see how good he was, you'd continue to need him, hopefully. He needed you to rely on him, to need him, so that way, you'd always come back to him and you'd be in his life.

"You're shaking."

He's snapped out of his toxic train of thoughts. "Hmm?"

"When you tense your muscles, though it's faint, you shake, and…" you lean in closer, ear to his chest, "well, I feel it a lot more since I'm right next to you."

He sweeps his hand to cradle your head, wanting to keep you there.

"Sorry, guess I'm just…"

You peek up at him. "Just what?"

"Tch… Just forget it."

You blink owlishly. Sheesh, you only wanted to open a line of communication with him. But even after all those years, even when (an unsteady) peace between Eldia and Marley was established, he keeps his walls up. He doesn't know that it's okay to start taking down those bricks, however slow or long it may take him to.

The birds are chirping a song outside, perched on the sill. You smile softly, listening. "Do you hear them?"

"Yeah."

You try to wiggle out of his arms. "Relax, and listen to them. They're trying to talk to us, maybe." You search for his eyes.

"Yeah, they say you need a shower."

Despite his joke, his pupils are trained on the door into the hall of your shared apartment. The poor man, is all you think; a tortured soul who's not used to reprieve and doesn't know how to accept the rest he deserves. Always on the lookout.

You shimmy out entirely of his grasp and sit up. Though faint, you don't miss the bit of resistance he put up. You purse your lips in thought. Coax him out of it. That's always been your go-to method of trying to get him to open up.

A small nudge in the right direction.

"Last night was fun."

He had started to hum with the birds up until then. He peers back and he turns fully to face you. "Good, I'm glad. I feel the same."

"So feel it," you insist. "I think you don't allow yourself to enjoy the nice things in life."

He scoffs, in denial. "I'd hardly consider this a pleasant "morning after" experience."

"Not when you keep yourself so guarded and cagey, no."

Whatever scoff or smirk he tried to force fell flat. He averts his gaze, sensing a lecture. But when you move to ruffle his slowly thinning hair, his milky and grey eyes find yours. You smile sadly at the grey hairs you spot.

"I'm fine, I'm okay, Levi. You don't need to worry about me, ever. So rest. It's just us, now."

He scoffs, again, and turns his back to you. You flop down and trace the pads of your fingers over his muscles. You trace every scar and blemish; every cut and piece of skin so torn, it can hardly repair itself back to "normal."

He's always been the most human of the lot, and the most scarred (in more ways than one.) He carries the scars with him. The anguished fallen, the courageous subordinates he never got to apologize to. He carries them with him. Like how he carries his former squad, Erwin and Hange.

"Put down your swords now, Levi, the war is over. Take off the armour, too, that shit gets heavy."

He swallows thickly. "What about you? What if you're ever in danger? With my body like this, I ca–"

"Leave the sword at your feet, then. Pick it up when you need to," you soothe. You lean down to kiss him. When his shoulders creak, you giggle. "See, you're getting old! We should resting now."

I just can't be alone. Not after everything that's happened, he thinks.

"'We'," he parrots. "What about when you get bored living with a cripple?"

What will I do when you leave me?

"Well, no one else can make Sunday morning pancakes like you!"

He smiles for the first time now, his lips curling with bliss. He has to internally fight the urge to tense. "Don't make it out that pancakes are an achievement… Then again, I have never seen someone so god-awful at flipping."

He rolls onto his back now. You lower a hand to his scarred, pallid cheek. You smooth a thumb under his milky eye. As gently as you can manage, you sink back into his arms.

"So as long as you'll have me, I won't be leaving any time soon."

You don't miss the thick swallow and the trembling lips.

"I'm staying right here, 'Vi."

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ rbs and comments always appreciated!! ♡

#levi ackerman #levi x reader #husbando tag<3 #levi ackerman x reader #snk levi #aot levi #captain levi #levi ackerman fluff #levi ackerman angst #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #lol might delete this what did i just cough up

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saenora · 1 year

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couple picrewss TT link: 1 2

MY BRAIN MALFUNCTIONED. WE’RE DOING IT. victorian/ROYAL AU WITH MY BELOVED SAE <333 !!! HE MAKES ME WANNA JUMP ON HIM, AND OFC THE WEDDING. AJDHDHDH YALL ARE INVITED <3

#: @humanitys-strongest-bamf @yamaguccitadashi @leviismybby @bertholdts--butt @mrsackermannx @youre-ackermine @palebrunettesstuff @sixpennydame @afortoru @nelapanela94 + 🫵 WHO SAW THIS AND DHHDHDHD <333 dont be shy!! SWOOSH IN!

#picrew #tag youre it #sae <3 #SAE DHDHFJFJ #no pressure #OKAY BYEEHDHFHFH #OMW TO MEETING PEOPELNDDN AND I DID THISS BEFOREHDJD SO POSTING RN #I AM SO AGGREESIVEELY IN LOVE W HIMDHDJD <333 #UGHH MY ADORABLEST BABY.. TO MANNNY FEELINGS AT WORK

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lelewright1234 · 6 days

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄

°:. *₊ ° . ☆ 　 °:. *₊ ° . ° .•

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• "if stars would fall

. everytime i would think

. ☆ of you, the midnight sky

* . would soon be empty."

°:. *₊ ° . ☆ 　 °:. *₊ ° . ° .•

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

° . *₊ ☆ ° . ☆ *₊ ☆

.　 *　.　　　　. 　 ° 　. ● ° .

╔══☆═════════╗

✎༄ нєωωσ тнєяє ƒєℓℓσω loves !˳⸙;;

₊˚.༄ ೃנυѕт ραѕѕιηg ву тσ ѕαу тнαт ι ℓυν уσu all ѕσ мυ¢н!♡ 🥳🥳🥳🥳

~🌺 🎂 Hello my loves, I just wanted to say that today is MY BIRTHDAY!!! APRIL 23 IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME AND ALL APRIL 23TH BIRTHDAYS OF THE WORLD!!! We must pull through with the COVID-19 Virus and stay strong with each other!!!🎂🌺 ~

There are five messages that I need to tell myself since today is my special day!

1. Happy birthday to a self-willed, strong, and beautiful soul. Yes, you got it right! I am turning a year older today. HBD to me!

2. It is with great pleasure that I am here to celebrate another year of my life. I am grateful for surviving all the challenges and struggles with COVID-19 throughout the last 365 days and turning a year older.

3. Growing up, everyone around me spent all their time trying to be great. I am one of the lucky ones who has always been great. Happiest birthday to me!

4. As I turn a year older today, I am most thankful for the people around me and the gift of being alive. Happy Birthday to me and I Thank God For Waking Me Up For Another Day!~

5. I am not holding back any joy today. I will love every minute of today and laugh as much as possible because it is my day. Heartfelt Birthday to me.

Numbers 6:24-26 (NIV)

“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace." “The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace."

ღ♪*•.¸¸.•*¨¨*•.¸.•*¨¨*•.¸¸.•*•♪ღ♪

ღ♪░H░A░P░P░Y░ B░I░R░T░H░D░A░Y░♪ღ

•♪ღ♪*•.¸¸.•*¨¨*••*¨¨*•.¸¸.•*•♪ღ♪

╚════════☆═══╝

▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄

Here are some wonderful people who also deserve some hugs! @scrimblyscrorblo @emerald-notes @tigerzreal @littlepissbabee @nardo-headcanons @mefiman @grirlfromnanae @caulifle @bananafire11 @sheadre @borathae @maryeolie @namjoonswaifu @disapoingg @nelapanela94 @pixieknj @lovecoree @yurmomsawh0r @imagineanime2022 @fanpageknight @peachywritess @peachy213jiminie @emerald-notes @gulnarsultan @sasxkeswhore @fruitmins @danchou-danchou @mill-kh @vinetae @panjakes @gayforchrollo @imjustaporiichild @space-lamplighter @pastel-kaleesh @azucarmorena97 @anime-fan-05 @iamthecabbage @mmmaaa000 @xngelsau @xddaengx @hellcifrogs @sweetlyskz @readingevilfood @mdzsfan @feifood @queenofallimagines @shina-moon-art @da-shrimping-station @junowritings @stickbug-made-entirely-of-spite @cuddleyhoney @bigogles @wiinterz @queer-clown-stuff @sheadre @bluelolblue @blueberryflutterby @kdramacrybaby @sweetchup @sweetwolfcupcake @azucarmorena97 @scrimblyscrorblo @borathae @grirlfromnanae @littlepissbabee @space-lamplighter @kimbappykidding @kimbapuhkidding @yurmomsawh0r

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jayteacups · 2 years

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Another picrew tag game bc why not <3

Thought this was cute! A couple moots on discord were talking about how there hasn’t really been many tag games lately so a bunch are coming in so here is my contribution 😂 have fun!!

Picrew link

Tagging: @postwarlevi @happybird16 @levmada @hauntedhousecat @poisonpeche @darlingheichou @chaotic-nick @delphi-thefairy @nelapanela94 @peace-for-levi @sckerman @flamingblinglove @ack3rlady @m-jelly @inmymusing + anyone who sees this!

#tag game #picrew

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humanitys-strongest-bamf · 8 months

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hiii I'm new to the aot / levi fandom and was wondering if you could give me some levi blogs to follow ? thank you so much xx

welcome!! welcome to the thirst train that is the levi ackerman fandom dskfjskdjf

i'm going through my moots list and here are some levi-centric blogs i love interacting with! (mostly fanfic authors because writing is my guilty pleasure lol) note that this is NOT an all inclusive list and i'm so sorry if i missed any moots 😭 it's been over a week since i've been able to eat normally so my brain is just like 👁️👄👁️

if any levi-centric blogs weren't mentioned, pls feel free to comment below! :3

@belovedackerman @chaotic-on-main @chosos-mascara @danchou-danchou @darlingheichou @gothgril69 @happybird16 @jayteacups @leviismybby @littlerequiem @lucysarah-c @mootheskinnycowsblog @mrsackermannx @nelapanela94 @nixie-writes-aot @ohmytomorrowisthursday @postwarlevi @randomlevithoughts @romantichomicide95 @roseofdarknessblog @sixpennydame @starrylevi @suukee @svftackerman @youre-ackermine

also if there's anyone on this list that want to be taken off, feel free to send me an ask/dm and let me know! (‾◡◝)

#kat chats

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levi-supreme · 2 years

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Rei's Event: Happy Birthday Levi 2022

Yes, I am back with this event again!!! Last year's Happy Birthday Levi was such a success, and I knew I had to do it again this year!

Similar to last year's format, one Levi-related post will be made per day starting from 25 November, and ending on his birthday on 25 December, like an advent calendar!

The theme for this event would be ‘Sweet like Sugar’. Unlike last year, this year's event will be strictly sfw only! Fics, artwork, headcanons, drabbles, moodboards, anything featuring Levi is welcomed! You can also do reader inserts, self-inserts/self-ship, anything! You can do more than one work too!

The tag I’ll be using for this event is #rei’s event: happy birthday Levi 2022. So if you do not want to get spammed, you may block this tag!

Status: CLOSED (0/31 slots available)

Rules:

1. Anyone 16 and above can join in this event! You don't have to be following me to join in.

2. I welcome any sort of work as long as Levi is the main character. Levi x reader, Levi x character, Levi x oc, Levi x you etc are all welcomed!

3. This is a SFW-only fluff event. Angst is allowed as long as it's hurt/comfort, or there's a happy ending. Likewise, suggestive themes are okay as long as it is still fluffy with no form of smut involved. Please be reminded again that no (major) character death, no dark content, and no nsfw will be allowed.

4. The first few posts should be ready by 25 November. If you are unable to finish before then, let me know so that I can delay your post to a later date.

How to join:

1. Send me an ask or a dm to let me know what content you will be doing for Levi. Let me know which date you want to post your creation by checking the list of available dates below the cut. Multiple posts are allowed!

2. If your preferred date is taken, I will let you know ASAP and you can choose another date accordingly.

3. Reblog this post once I’ve added you to the master list to acknowledge your participation.

4. Let me know early if you are unable to meet the dateline too!

5. Tag me (@levi-supreme) in your finished work and remember to mention it’s for Rei’s ‘Happy Birthday Levi’ event! Remember to also use my event tag #rei’s event: happy birthday Levi 2022!

Thank you for the support, and let’s all celebrate Levi’s birthday together again this year ❤

The master list for this event can be found here!

D-30 | 25 November // @levi-supreme // selfship fic (Levi x Rei) // posting on @reikoackerman

D-29 | 26 November // @postwarlevi // fic (Levi x fem!reader feat. 104th cadets)

D-28 | 27 November // @levi-supreme // drabble (Levi x gender neutral!reader)

D-27 | 28 November // @levi-supreme // selfship art (Levi and Rei)

D-26 | 29 November // @postwarlevi // fic (Levi x gender neutral!reader)

D-25 | 30 November // @youre-ackermine // drabble (Levi x fem!Hange)

D-24 | 01 December // @sparkywrites25 // fic (Levi x Petra)

D-23 | 02 December // @levi-supreme // moodboard (statistics professor Levi)

D-22 | 03 December // @levi-supreme // selfship post (Levi and I's four kids) // posting on @reikoackerman

D-21 | 04 December// @barbossa2319 // drabble (Levi x gender neutral!reader)

D-20 | 05 December // @jayteacups // fic (Levi x gender neutral!reader)

D-19 | 06 December // @postwarlevi // fic (Levi x fem!reader)

D-18 | 07 December // @levi-supreme // drabble (Levi x gender neutral!reader)

D-17 | 08 December // @postwarlevi // fic (Levi x fem!reader feat. 104th cadets)

D-16 | 09 December // @barbossa2319 // drabble (Levi x gender neutral!reader)

D-15 | 10 December // @sparkywrites25 // fic (fem!Levi x Petra)

D-14 | 11 December // @levi-supreme // fic (Levi x fem!reader)

D-13 | 12 December // @mootheskinnycowsblog // fic (Levi x fem!reader)

D-12 | 13 December // @we-are-so-close // fic (Levi x reader)

D-11 | 14 December // @jayteacups // drabble (Levi x gender neutral!reader)

D-10 | 15 December // @jayteacups // drabble (Levi x fem!reader)

D-9 | 16 December // @sparkywrites25 // fic (Levi x fem!reader)

D-8 | 17 December // @nelapanela94 // fic (Levi x fem!reader)

D-7 | 18 December // @ack3rlady // art (Levi)

D-6 | 19 December // @youre-ackermine // moodboard (Levi)

D-5 | 20 December // @barbossa2319 // fic (Levi x fem!reader)

D-4 | 21 December // @nneuwiller // fic (Levi x Mikasa)

D-3 | 22 December // @mootheskinnycowsblog // art (Levi)

D-2 | 23 December // @starstruckkittensweets // fic (Levi x fem!OC)

D-1 | 24 December // @sparkywrites25 // fic (Levi x fem!reader)

D-day | 25 December // @levi-supreme // selfship fic (Levi x Rei feat. our four kids) // posting on @reikoackerman

#rei.talks #rei's event: happy birthday levi 2022 #MY CHILD IS HEREEEEEEE #please don't flop #please help to reblog this too!!! <3

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happybird16 · 2 years

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Picrew Time!!! Here it is!!

Me, (Kitty)Levi and Aki!! It’s just so cute!!

Tagging: @postwarlevi @levisbrat25 @hauntedhousecat @nelapanela94 @darlingheichou and anyone else who wants to join in!!

#picrews #I should find more Halloween ones #moot games #I’m always afraid of tagging too many people #because then they won’t have anyone to tag #lmao

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postwarlevi · 2 years

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Iiiiiiiit's piccrew time!

This is the first couple one I came across, I will do more later!

Sometimes I just need to be held by Levi, you know?

tagging: @happybird16 @nelapanela94 @hauntedhousecat @levisbrat25 @levmada @theferricfox @whattheheckmidoriya @yakaaamoz @ack3rlady @levi-supreme @hashaneeee @darlingheichou @poisonpeche @jayteacups @chaotic-nick @charlotteplsdosth @anlian-aishang @m-jelly @porcogalliardenthusiast @xttxck

and whoever else wants! That's enough tags LOL but it's been a minute so...sorry!

#picrew #leviza #hope ya'll want to do more #i'll try to plan the others soon!

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wortverlust · 2 years

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Jo!!!!! Hi how are you? Are you enjoying the change in seasons?

Random question, you did a fan art for a fic a while back. I think it was called 'cry baby' but i can't remember do you have a link for it? I started reading it but forgot to bookmark it 😭

Hey hey (: okay…my old brain can't remember a fic by the name 'cry baby' T_T but here are a few links to the fanfics I've drew something for (: AND If someone knows which fic it might be, please let us know (btw I'm pretty sure I forgot some... I really need to update my masterlist/ navigation)

SFW Fanfic

Happy Christmas/Merry Birthday by @postwarlevi Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by @dr-ackerman Happy birthday, I love you. by @sakurashell short fic by @nelapanela94

NSFW Fanfic

Moon River. by @lacheri Crossing The Line, Just Like Heaven by @pondering-apollo Superior- summer rain by @astridthevalkyrie Afterglow, ballerina pink by @bibblelevi Levi watching his crush masterbate, Well… Most of Her by @levi-my-beloved Stretch, Beloved Mother (angst) by @happybird16 Morgen by @peace-for-levi

(and I'm sorry for tagging everyone, if you want to be removed, please let me know <3)

#I did go back in time today #it took me over an hour #AND I STILL FEEL I MISSED SOMEONE #AAARGH!!!#well #can't help it #please let me know which one I forgot #and jog my memories >_<#WISH YOU an WONDERFUL day (:#and please take care of yourself #also Thank YOU so very much for sticking here #found some very old asks from you <333 #LOTS OF LOVE YOUR WAY!!!!#ask.strigandr-the-cat #jo.answers #Fic rec

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joules720 · 2 years

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For being so nice and cute, copy this to 10 other bloggers that you think are wonderful. Keep the GAME going and make others feel beautiful 💝💖💛

To @leviackermanmyhero245, I absolutely adore you! You're ever so sweet to me. Thank you for choosing me to be a part of this fun game! Here are my 10! 🤍✨

@m-jelly @juliaxbb

@shiftingparadise @little-spoiled-brat

@levi-my-beloved @imikhey

@wortverlust @wetforlevi

@nelapanela94 @postwarlevi

*Funny how all bloggers are Levi-associated. Regardless, it truly astounds me of how amazing and remarkable each of you are with your gifts and talents. That's what makes you truly beautiful., even though I don't know everyone personally. Love and appreciate you all! KEEP THE GAME ALIVE AND SEND IT TO ALL THOSE YOU LOVE AND CARE FOR SO THAT WE CAN MAKE EVERYONE SMILE AND THEIR DAY BRIGHTER!!!🤍✨

#love #kindness #beautiful #wonderful #aot #attack on titan #snk #shingeki no kyojin #levi ackerman

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peace-for-levi · 1 year

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Welcome Back

lol hiiiii, sorta haven't written in *checks watch* eight months so i am RUSTY.

cw: feelings of grief, graphic descriptions of dissociation, reader feeling disconnected and needing to be grounded. post-expedition hurt-comfort is my fav genre, lol.

word count: 1447.

taglist: @levmada @jayteacups @happybird16 @theferricfox @sckerman @wortverlust @lostinwildflowers @pockcock @nelapanela94 @notgoodforlife @unadulteratedtreecrusade @starstruckkittensweets

Arms up. Arms down.

Grief anchors and weighs you down like a ball and chain. It's heavy, cumbersome and you are left to just bear the brunt of it. It has a way of removing you from the world, leaving you unable (even unwilling) to reconnect. The most recent expedition and the deaths that came with it weigh down on your shoulders. You lean over, back hunched. Neck tense.

Distantly, you recognise what it is you are feeling (or lack of.) Distantly, you recognise the expedition has probably sent you into this state.

Your vision is 'stretched', or distorted, and everything has a dull fuzz to it. You're sure if you reached to grab the book on your bedside locker, it would slip through your fingers and melt away.

And that you'd wake up from this.

You form a fist and relax it, stretching your fingers. Lines on your fingers; oh, five fingers, all with fingernails. Five sets of knuckles. These are your hands? Surely, right?

You form a fist and this time you squeeze, and you almost feel your nails sink in. Just slightly but it's enough for you to shudder. In realization? In pain?

It's not unusual for your mind to be stuck out in the plains beyond the Walls. The boom and echo of flares rattles in your ears, the screams of your comrades leaves your head spinning. The idea of being back in your bedroom is just something you haven't registered yet, too busy stuck somewhere between a nightmare and reality.

A fake, shadowy middle of unreality.

It's nauseating, harrowing. If not for your feet pressed to the floor and your calves backed to the edge of the bed frame, you'd have a hard time trusting gravity in keeping you down.

There's a voice in the foreground, but you're not quite there yet. Their speech is fragmented.

You cling to reason; to routine and actions. You try to cling to dialogue and even though you understand the words, they don't get processed. You try to attune to the conversation, however one-way it is.

"Your shoulders tense up when you get like this. Relax."

Shoulders… ah, your shoulders? So you roll them. You don't really know what else to do. Tense? Why are you tense and what–

…

What are you…?

Where…?

Levi senses he's losing you further here, so he gives you an order. A command; you can latch onto that. It'll give your brain something to do, long enough to take you away from the plains.

"Legs out. I'll undo your buckles," he says as he kneels between your legs.

Leg up, straighten, leg down.

Same idea again for your left.

The frigid air against your – now – bare skin makes you shiver. Your clothes are being taken off, piece by piece.

"Do you know where you are?"

"Do you know…?" is a question that he noticed that also makes you come back to your senses. He has asked a question that requires a logical answer; you need to go searching for clues.

You know it's your bedroom – what else could it possibly be? – but it just looks so… wrong. In a moment of faint realization, you feel the night's gentle breeze prick the skin on your legs. You turn to the bedside locker and see a bowl of lumpy, congealed soup with a bread roll that looks like it's on the verge of going bad. You must have forgotten to eat it. There's an oil lamp next to the soup, as well as an old book. Reading is a bit too hard at the moment; you can hardly put together the title of the book.

Now you look in front of you. Of course the black hair and grey eyes belong to your lover, but he didn't look so real right now. If you reached out to touch him, would you feel the black tresses spill between your fingers? The war-torn hands clasp your own?

You sink your fingertips into his scalp. He lets it happen, lets you cling to him. He doesn't even flinch, he knows you need grounding. He brings a hand up and rests it on yours, as if to say…

Feel me.

I am alive. You are alive. We are both here, and you will not wake up from this.

(Your brain just needs a lot of convincing.)

He squeezes his hand over yours. "You're getting ready for a bath, I'm helping you," he states. More information to cling to. "Whatever you're feeling, let it be there."

He is slowly walking you to your ensuite. The ground beneath your feet felt soft, even for oak planks. You fumble as you walk, second-guessing your surroundings, but Levi's got you.

He's always there.

The boundaries of the room appear elusive and murky, as you reach out for the skirting on the sides of the bathroom door. Levi was smart and had the bath ready to go, warm water prepped. With a cupped palm, he gently guides you into the bath.

"Step in."

A command to follow.

Leg up, over, and sit.

You soak into the heated water and sit down. You vaguely feel the suds cling to you. The aware part of you hopes they'll wash away the muddy feeling.

Levi begins to fill up a bucket of the sudsy water. He takes a look at your toned back, marred with grime, dirt and caked blood, and stops. He thumbs over some of the rougher sores and tears; some of these scars have been there for years. Shades of purples and blacks and reds, dotting the surface; all serving as a horrific reminder that, so far, you have made it back home every time.

You watch the dirt drip down and swirl in the water, floating there.

Silence permeates between the two of you, and normally, it is a comfortable silence. But Levi wanted to check in.

"How are you doing now, [F/n]?"

Blink. You stare back at him with pupils blown, looking at everything and nothing. "Fine."

"Do you know who I am?" He asks, carefully, scrubbing your shoulders.

Black hair, grey eyes. "Levi…" you murmur.

He nods. Should he press further? He's not sure.

Dissociation is a fickle defense mechanism with a hair-trigger temperament. It can be the deaths of the comrades in your most recent expedition; it could also be triggered by the smell or sound that reminds you of something unpleasant. It sometimes comes when it wants and Levi learned the best way to deal with it was to not deal with it. To let it happen, and sit beside you as it does.

"Don't fight it. Let it be there."

But you don't want it to be there. You stretch out your palm and reach for the towel, but you just hold it. Maybe for comfort, maybe to feel a texture. You register the caked blood by your cuticles and you keep it in your mind's eye for a second, but your vision starts to splinter again.

"But it feels awful…" you find yourself saying. "I hate not recognising my surroundings, I hate not–"

He cuts in. "I know, sweetheart. I know." He takes hold of your hand and squeezes. "I know." He assures.

Because he does.

He's sat with you through every episode of this.

He guides you out of the bath when you're done, and dresses you in your nightgown. He sweeps your hair up and out of your face, before cupping your cheeks. You practically fall into his hands. He pats your cheek in response.

"You back with me yet?"

You shake your head, but your answers are coming out quicker now. He steers you with one hand on the small of your back and peels back the comforter.

As the room gets shrouded in darkness, you're pulled to his chest. A smell of cedar and black tea, the thrum of his pulse and the rise and fall of his chest. Small circles being etched into your hips by his thumb.

"We're going to try to rest now." He tells you.

A command of sorts, something to stick to.

Get in bed, lie down, and breathe.

"Yes, okay," you mumble as you twiddle your thumbs. "Okay."

He pulls you impossibly closer, nose in the crook of your neck and suddenly... you're in the clear.

"I'm [F/n]. I'm in my room. I'm with Levi…" you whisper to yourself, with confidence.

"Welcome back," your lover sleepily replies.

{friendly reminder acceptance doesn't work for everyone but it is a healthy start for some!}

#cece; speaks #levi x reader #husbando tag<3 #levi ackerman #captain levi #levi ackerman angst #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x you #aot #snk #aot levi #snk levi #levi x you #tw.dissociation #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin

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nelapanela94 · 1 year

Note

Hey! Accidentally hit one of your posts as missing a community label while I was scrolling on my phone, I felt bad and wanted to warn you in case something happens with that. I'm so sorry. It's this one https://www.tumblr.com/nelapanela94/709464011922702336/short-sweet-drabble-before-going-to-bed-not?source=share

*Panicks*

Ohh!

I didn't know what it meant. Well, if it goes to any moderator there's nothing wrong with it. No violence, smut or suggestive topics.

Accidents happen

#nela’s mailbox

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chocnat · 2 years

Note

Hiii Tasha!!!

1, 4, 11 for the ask game :3 please

heya, Nela!!

1. What fandom(s) did you join this year? hehehehehehehehehe...I think I joined the AOT fandom this year? I'm pretty sure I joined the JJK, BNHA, and Tokrev fandom this year 👉🏼😎👉🏼

4. What show/book/movie etc. was your comfort and/or escape this year? Jujutsu Kaisen! 😆

11. Name a fellow fan who you really appreciated this year. Gosh...there are a lot. Actually, all of my mutuals here on Tumblr. You're all in my mind when I read this question. That goes for you, @presidentmonica, @loki-yoursaviourishere, @hvelfa, @aotmentality...mostly people in the Loki's Norway and Levi's Tea Shop Discord servers! I appreciate each and everyone of you! ❤❤❤

send me some end of 20202021 fandom asks!

#ask tasha #nelapanela94

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levi-my-beloved · 2 years

Text

Til Death Do Us Part (Part 2)

Part 1 Part 3

Pairing: Canon!Levi x F!Reader

Word Count: 6.3K

Warnings: Nightmares, loss, grief, Zeke mf Yeager

A/N: Not this chapter almost turning me into a Zeke fucker fr sjkerqgjreglneqnsjwfobew OKAY SO this might actually be a four part fic I was going to have the attack on Marley in this part but i got WAY too carried away with reader's new life in Marley and her bond with all the Warriors and nOW I WANNA DO A WARRIORS FIC GODDAMNIT

Tagging: @maries-gallery @nelapanela94 @peace-for-levi @levmada @elizaack (look at me, posting a second part relatively soon pls be proud of me) @mamadoe @4evahevah @nirvana-jam-94 @galactict3a @swirrley

“This one?”

“This one.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

“But she’s–”

“Questioning my judgement, Braun?”

“...No.”

“Levi?”

Sunlight. Warm, golden sunlight. A soft breeze wafted the sheer curtains from the open window. It smelt… fresh. Clean. Like morning dew. The tuneful hum of songbirds provided an almost comically tranquil soundtrack to your curious gaze. Brows pinched in gentle concern as the smooth skin of your knuckle caressed the side of his face, bringing him into consciousness.

Your smile could start a war. “There you are. I think you were having a nightmare.” The warmth of the midmorning sun highlighted the colour of your eyes, your gaze pulling him in until he felt his lips brush ever so slightly against yours in a sweet ‘good morning’. Pulling back, Levi’s eyes traced the lines of your face as he tried to recall what made you wake him in such a way. No clear memory of his dreams came to him, so he simply wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you in. Your soft laugh sent warmth through his chest, your face tucked in against his neck.

“Thanks.” was all he said, murmured into your hair as his thumb caressed your spine, content to simply feel you. Feel your skin breathe beneath his fingertips. Your pulse beneath his palm. Your breath against his throat. You were here, with him. You were alive. But as much as he wanted to stay in bed with you for the rest of the day, you both, unfortunately, had things to take care of. One of those things was currently crying up a storm from her cot in the next room.

“Kuchel…” he felt you mutter against his neck, before your muscles shifted beneath his hands. Not wanting to let go just yet, Levi intertwined his hand with yours. Twin silver rings gently glinted in the light, catching his eye as he admired them. It took him much longer than he would have liked to propose to you, but after the scare of almost losing you that day, he couldn’t delay the question any longer. There was no danger now. No threat. Just you and him. And now, you’re daughter.

“How long have we been married?” Levi almost chuckled at your look of incredulous disbelief. A harsh flick to his bicep forced out that mirth, and a gentle hint of amusement on your own face before you quickly turned away from him. He knew he wanted you to think you were mad at him, so he played along. Sitting up from the warm sheets, Levi circled his arms around your waist, settling his chin on your shoulder, but you once again turned your face away.

“No, I’m mad at you right now. I can’t believe you don’t know how long we’ve been married! Have the last two years not been enough for you?” there was no real malice to your tone, but that lilt of teasing that he fell so hard for. Two years. Two of the best years of his life. Looking back on them, he…

Looking back…… he……….

Why couldn’t he remember them? He’d been married to you for two years now and he couldn’t remember a single fucking thing? What the hell was going on?

“Hey…” your soft call brought him back, another hand on his cheek. “Your head’s just fuzzy this morning. You’ll remember, busybrain, don’t worry.” his eyes closed on instinct as your lips found his temple, pressing a soft kiss before another cry was wrenched from the neighbouring room. You were right. How you always knew, he’d never understand, but you were right. He was just having a weird morning.

“Kuchel’s gonna wake the whole district if she keeps screaming like that,” it was that light laughter he’d fought so hard for. You carefree bubbles that kept him going all through those harrowing years of war.

“That would be quite an achievement, since we live 400 miles from civilisation.” A soft tap to his arm had him release you from his embrace, watching as you stretched your arms high above your head, his shirt riding up to your upper thigh. Levi admired your figure from behind, his brow raising as you looked at him over your shoulder, a brow of your own raised in sly questioning. “You, Levi Ackerman, are absolutely shameless,” your grin had his heart leaping and his legs moving, coming up to once again embrace you from behind, leaving featherlight kisses along the side of your neck and where his shirt fell slightly from your shoulder.

“Your fault for looking so damn good.” he breathed, content to bask in the proximity and domesticity he never thought he’d be allowed to experience. He had so much blood on his hands. Erwin’s, his squad’s, your’s–

Wait, what?

“I love you,” once again you brought him back. Weird fucking morning indeed, but his soul sang with the admition of adoration.

“I love you too,” they were words he could now say without restraint. Without fear of never being able to say them again. He could say ‘Will you marry me?’ without fear of ever losing you to Titans. They were gone now. You were safe. “I’ll get breakfast on.” with a squeeze of your waist, Levi released you once again from his grip.

His feet padded against the rustic wood of the cottage floor. The day was warm enough that sweats and a jumper didn’t seem necessary. It was the late spring heat that revitalised his bones and rejuvenated his skin. The grass was damp with that morning dew he smelt earlier, the sun just cresting the trees on the left side of his family home. It was quaint, peaceful. A small vegetable patch and flower garden kept the two of you occupied in the spring and summer months, various books and a warm fireplace accompanying you in the autumn and winter.

Levi ran the faucet in the kitchen briefly, splashing some cool water on his face in the hopes that whatever the hell was going on with him this morning would be cleansed from his mind, before stepping outside onto the veranda. The lively clucking of chickens drew him to the wooden hen house at the end of the garden, the crowing of the rooster had him rolling his eyes. ‘Bit fucking late for that, don’t ya think?’, but he wouldn’t be caught dead chastising a fucking chicken out loud, so he kept his thoughts to himself as he opened the sliding door. Fetching the feed bucket, he scattered a handful of corn out onto the grass, wondering how on earth his chickens had breakfast before he did. Another handful disappeared into the green blades as five round, glossy birds stalked out into the morning glare, the sun reflecting off their well kept feathers, followed by a green tailed rooster, who looked more proud of himself than usual. Levi raised a thin brow as he watched the animal preen himself, before clicking his tongue and unhooking the latch.

Removing two smooth, light brown eggs from the cluster, he left the rest where they were. He’d take them later, when he had the basket with him, but for now he didn’t trust himself to carry so many and not break a few.

“Hm. Not bad.” he muttered as he closed the hutch, turning back only to see your visage, standing and watching him from the shade of the veranda. Your head tilted slightly to the side in subtle adoration, little Kuchel grabbing at the bottle in your hands. Your light sundress flowed to the side in the breeze, the apron you’d adorned only further emphasised the pleasant domesticity of his new life. He paused for a second, simply admiring the life he never thought he could have, before his brows furrowed slightly, his eyes squinting to see clearer against the light. Maybe you’d cut your finger cutting the vegetables for later, but the smallest spot of crimson had managed to mark the white chest of your apron. With a fond roll of his eyes, Levi made to walk back to you, to inspect your finger and make sure you were alright.

But he couldn’t move.

He tried again, his legs seemingly stuck in an invisible quagmire that held him fast. Looking back up to you, his quizzical frown slackened. That spot of crimson was no longer a spot, but a blotch. And it was slowly spreading. You were no longer smiling, but your eyes had gone wide with fear. Kuchel started crying. Not that wail for attention, but an open, sheer scream of terror.

Levi tried again to get to you, his heartbeat increasing with every failed yank to pull himself free. A glance down to his legs confirmed no trap, no snare. Just failure. He looked back in time to see you choke, that same colour crimson slowly leaking down your chin from your mouth, staining your daughter’s pale skin. Your eyes never left his.

He opened his mouth to call for you, but found his vocal chords as stuck as his legs. He couldn’t look away, couldn’t move towards you as flame erupted from the cottage, silhouetting your bleeding form against a wall of fire. You too, didn’t move. Not even as those flames licked and nipped at your legs. Not even as those flames caught on your sundress, the material instantly catching. Your arms fell limp by your sides, and Levi watched as his daughter fell with them, and landed with a dull thud. Her pained screaming cut short. Her writhing limbs now still.

A choked sob tore from his clenched throat as he realised, fighting against the force that held him back from you. It took all of his strength to move his foot an inch. All of his strength to move another. He was getting to you. He could make it. He wouldn’t lose you.

Not again.

Your head fell to the side, the angle of your neck unnatural. Shattered glass at your feet, pale milk pooling around his child. Your child.

Your mouth cracked open, rapsing in a breath before–

“Levi…”

The ground where you were standing exploded into an inferno. Levi’s roar matched your scream, only his arm free to reach out to your burning body. The heat instantly evaporated the tears streaming from his eyes. He roared again, harrowing terror poisoning his eyes as he was forced to watch the skin melt from your bones, your skeleton standing in writhing agony before Levi was forced to shield his eyes, that heat now briefly coming for him before in a flash of white, it was gone.

Whatever held him finally let go, leaving him frozen, shaking, and in ruins. Faced with the charred black remains of his life with you, still smouldering and smoking in the dull grey light. Ash blew in that same gentle breeze that not half an hour ago had been so welcoming.

He was stuck. Heart hammering in his chest, tears still leaking from his eyes, sobs tearing from his throat. Levi was stuck looking at what remained of his life. What remained of you. A soot-stained skeleton, face down, arm stretched out as if to reach for him. He couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t comprehend what just happened. Even as he took a shaking step forward, leaves rustling in the silence, he couldn’t find peace. He would never find peace.

A harsh grip around his ankle. The sickening crack of bones. A piercing scream from your disintegrated lungs, and Levi was thrust harshly back into his reality.

Bile. Thick, burning bile singed his oesophagus as Levi barely registered waking up before his instincts flung himself from his bed and onto the cold wood floor. He felt as if he were fighting against himself, nails dragging and splitting along the surface of the floor as he scrambled to drag his uncooperative limbs across the room. He couldn’t even cringe at the dust, or the way he was still in his uniform.

Acid once again rose in the back of his throat as he shoved past the door to his ensuite bathroom, throwing himself over the bowl of the toilet before emptying out the contents of his stomach. That image of you, of your flame engulfed form, was that how you died? In searing agony? The flesh melting from your bones? Your face pulled in screaming anguish?

Another wave of nausea hit him like a punch to the gut, spilling pure stomach acid into the bowl before he had nothing left to give, dry retching at the stench of vomit and ash. Though he knew the second smell wasn’t real, simply a figment of his night-terror.

Levi left it a second after his stomach stopped heaving, before collapsing back against the tile wall of the bathroom, breathing hard. His mouth and teeth felt disgusting, but he couldn’t find it in himself to move as he drew his legs up to his chest, his head bowing low. It had been four years now. Four years since the reclamation of Wall Maria. Four years since the Scouts suffered losses of the likes nobody had ever seen before.

Four years since he lost you.

It wasn’t a thought he entertained at first. You weren’t gone. You were still alive. Empty promises made to himself, to one day return to Shiganshina and find you. Bring you home. Worse than that, he actually believed it. He actually believed you were still alive, somewhere out there, fighting for survival. But the shorter the days got, and the longer the months grew, that belief, that hope, started to dwindle. By the third year, it had been snuffed out completely, leaving Captain Levi a hollow, broken man.

He tried. He really did. He tried to keep his sleep schedule as good as it was with you. He tried to eat as frequently as he would when you were still there. He tried to keep up with the socials, the drinks, the whole business of ‘friends’ but… he struggled to see a point to any of it. He wanted to join you. Waking up from all those dreams about his own death, only to be crushed by disappointment of realising that’s all they were. Dreams.

His heart ached. His soul had been torn in two as if it were as fragile as the pages of those novels you enjoyed so much. He never thought himself so brittle when he was with you. But in your absence, in your death, he’d come to realise just how fragile he was.

Levi lifted his head to look at the ceiling, tears slipping from the corner of his dull eyes. He remembered every detail of his dreams about you. Every excruciating moment. The crinkle of your eyes as you smiled, the way your lips would quirk up when you were messing with him. Even the shit that used to annoy him, his heart ached, throbbed, to see it again. Your messier tendencies. Your irritated huffs when he refused to take a simple two minute break before he “snapped his spine in half” you would say.

Taking a deep, shaky breath, Levi pulled the chain, allowing the contents of his stomach to disappear before dragging himself to his feet and over to the sink basin. His knuckles turned white as he gripped either side of the ivory porcelain, his head bowing low once again before he twisted the cold faucet on. Water streamed from the tap, gathering in his calloused palms before that water was splashed over his face, a refreshing blast to clear his head. But the action was too similar, too reminiscent of–

With a strangled gasp, Levi’s head shot up to the mirror above the basin, his wide eyes not trained on himself, but the reflected figure behind his shoulder.

You, charred, blackened, burnt. The whites of your eyes start against the soot of your skin, your neck’s unnatural angle returned, your jaw hung open in a silent scream. Levi was frozen in utter paralysed terror, until once again his body took over and in a sharp, cracking punch to the mirror, you were gone.

A moment of silence settled in the bathroom, Levi’s stuttering breathing returned. A dull throb in the broken skin of his knuckles, his eyes still focussed on a fragment of glass where he last saw your haunting visage gaping back at him, but there was nothing. Only the door to his bedroom.

Fuck. That’s the third one this month. The soft clink of glass against porcelain drew his eyes to the basin, where several reflective shards now gathered water beneath the faucet’s flow, tainted a diluted red where his knuckles had struck. His returning senses drew a hiss from his mouth, the split skin on his hand demanding attention as he ran it under the tap for a few moments. Dark crimson scabs had reopened from the blow, and he wasn’t entirely sure how to tell Hange he would need yet another replacement mirror.

They were already worried enough as it was.

Not that he could blame them. Given their positions switched, Levi would be worried too. But he didn’t have it in him to care, or to make an effort. Not anymore.

Twisting the faucet off, Levi took one last deep breath, before leaving the bathroom. Of all nights, tonight was not the night for this to happen. Not with what the Scouts had planned for tomorrow. Their little invasion of Marley, and to hopefully convinced Eren’s stupid fucking ass to come back and stop declaring war. Fuck sakes. Stupid fucking kid. Not only that, but he wouldn’t be able to honour his promise to Erwin. Not yet anyway.

Rather than head straight back into bed, Levi crossed to his chest of drawers, and pulled open the second from the top. He knew it was destructive, he knew it only served to torture himself further, but he couldn’t bring himself to throw some of you stuff out. He couldn’t lose the last part of you he still had. Besides, he already wore your engagement ring around his neck, how much more harm could he do?

Pulling out one of your white shirts, he thread his arms through the sleeves, so he was almost wearing the garment backwards, before padding back over to his bed. He still always kept to his side, shifting closer to the middle when he missed you. But this time, he shifted all the way, burying his nose in the pillows and wrapping his arms –clad in your shirt sleeves– around himself. His imagination allowed him to feel as if he was still in your embrace. That those really were your arms around him. That the pillow wasn’t actually a pillow, but your chest. That the pulse in his ears wasn’t his own, but rather your heartbeat.

“Eren’s such a pain in my fucking ass. Did I ever mention that? Kid can never just do as he’s told. Always had to go off on his own, get his ass captured or taken.” he could almost hear your tired chuckle as he buried himself further into your chest. “And his cleaning is lamentable. Not that yours was ever any better, you never did get the hang of dusting thoroughly did you?” a soft caress of your thumb on his bicep. “‘S’got this elaborate plan to take down Marley. Remember the airship I told you about? Yeah, we’re using that to cross the sea,” –Levi paused, swallowing– “Still can’t kill Zeke, but the second that fucking monkey puts a foot wrong, I’ll cut him up. I’ll still honour my promise to Erwin. No matter how long it takes,” –a tear slipped from his eye, followed by another, and another two after that– “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’ll never get to honour my promise I made to you. I’m so so sorry,” –Levi stifled a sob, tightening his arms around himself– “I miss you. So fucking much.”

The buzz of electric light kept you company as you towelled yourself down, the shower stall behind you dripping with the remains of your morning routine. You’d needed one this morning. A long, scalding shower to try and cleanse your mind and energise your sore muscles. It had been, for lack of a better phrase, a shitshow of a morning. Kicked awake by a nightmare, thrown up over your damn floor, and you’d managed to lightly pull a damn muscle training. You weren’t thinking straight. Poor Pieck had told you to go straight to the showers, promising she’d deal with the mess you’d left behind. You guessed she just didn’t want to be crawling around in your breakfast.

With a long, heavy sigh, you looked up into the mirror, eyes instantly falling to the six needlepoint scars on the side of your neck. ‘Enhancements’, they’d told you when you’d woken up. You’d agreed to run some tests, since you weren’t a warrior but were of Eldian blood. ‘Too valuable of a soldier to lose in thirteen years’, they’d said when you’d questioned it. It’s not like you could refute their claims. There was a battle, four years ago on another continent. Of course, you were sent along with the Warriors, but you were the calm before the storm. Taking out military leaders and generals in their sleep. Presidents and Emperors all fell to your blade, before the Warriors moved in and wiped out their armies. You’d heard of the Devils of Paradis, of course you had, and your hands itched to invade. To take out their generals and commanders and captains. You already used equipment of their invention, just upgraded to Marleyan standards. ODM Gear, apparently it was called, something War Chief Zeke managed to acquire and return with. Apparently it took very little training for you to get the hang of the gear, but once you did, Marley became almost unstoppable.

Running a hand through your damp hair, your fingertips grazed the scars on your neck. It was a shame, you thought, that you’d lost your memories four years ago in that battle. Nobody would even tell you where it was. They’d just vaguely mention some far away land across the ocean. But apparently you’d suffered severe head trauma. Zeke, Pieck and Reiner had found you, limp and unconscious. Of course they weren’t about to leave a comrade behind, especially after seeing you were still breathing.

Pieck never left your side after that. Choosing to move next to your room, just to keep an eye on you. It was sweet, you thought, though a little ironic she should be the one playing mother when you were a little older than her. Than all of them.

You were pulled out of your thoughts by a scream from the hallway, your head whipping to the door. Panic bubbled in your lower gut as you hastily pulled on a pair of baggy sweatpants and a loose tee before bolting for the hallway. Adrenaline pumped through your veins as you barged out of the communal bathrooms, darting round the corner, your heart in your throat. Knuckles drained white as you gripped the bannister, breathing hard as your wide eyes processed what had happened. Pieck and Porco stared back at you, expressions quizzical at your alarm.

“Who screamed?” you asked, still a little breathless as the adrenaline started to fizzle out of your bloodstream. Porco slowly raised his hand, still staring at you, before that same hand pointed to Pieck, who you only just registered was on the floor. You paused. “Whaaaaat are you doing?” you asked, all and any panic now completely gone from your mind. Pieck chuckled gently.

“Sorry, I was just explaining to Pock that this just feels more natural to me now, and I was sorry if I scared him,” there was something about Pieck’s soft voice that always put you at ease. She was calm like that.

“That’s still not my name, and can you please just walk normally? Creeping me out.” you noticed the slight flush on Porco’s cheeks, either at admitting Pieck scared him, or something else. Your lips quirked up in a subtle smile.

“It’s good to see you up, considering how hard you fought the other day. You really did a number on those lines. Who knew taking out commanders and generals would be so worth it, they could barely keep themselves together. Zeke may be Marley’s spear, and Reiner our shield, but you’re our dagger.” you couldn’t help the flare of pride in your heart at Pieck’s words, her voice laced with effort as she stood, leaning against the bannister to the stairs. You’d been quite the asset to Marleyan victories recently, since your enhancements peaked.

“You know I could never make it behind enemy lines without you getting me there first, don’t give me all the credit. You too Pock, you saved both my ass, and Reiner’s. Speaking of which…” –you paused, taking a small breath– “Anyone seen him? Since we returned?” your voice had dropped significantly, knowing the teen was going through some kind of trauma. Whatever happened on that island fucked him up badly. You couldn’t imagine it.

“Yeah, Pieck and I saw him yesterday. Went back to see Gabi and the others,” Porco’s voice was laced with venomous hatred. You only vaguely knew the relationship between the two of them, their mutual hatred having started before you lost your memories, but at this point, you couldn’t face asking them. You were sure the history there was too long for you to listen to anyway. Just before you could open your mouth to speak, your stomach rumbled loud enough you swear the people of Marley would have thought it was an earthquake.

Pieck chuckled, her dark eyes surveying you softly. “Look like your body wants to replace everything you threw up this morning,”

Porco’s nose crinkled in disgust. “Gross,”

“Yeah yeah, you throw up before a two hour workout regime and see how hungry you get.” You flicked his ear as you walked past him and down the stairs, prompting the muddy blonde to wave you off with a scoff. You snickered, hearing something about Pieck needing to get her crutch before their voices died away. You were granted a brief moment of silence before you opened the door to the barrack’s common room.

“Oh hey, good morning,” you started slightly as Colt greeted you, a smile instantly pulling at your lips.

“Oh, morning Colt! How’s Falco? Heard he did pretty well at Fort Slava, though once again overshadowed by Gabi. That girl’s a machine!” you grinned, crossing over to snatch a mug from the rack above your head and scooping in three decent sized spoonfuls of instant coffee. The kettle was already warm, not that it ever wasn’t in the mornings. It seemed an addiction to caffeine was a requirement to be somewhat higher up in the Marleyan military.

“Yeah, Falco’s fine. Still sort of torn up over the whole Gabi being the definite Armoured inheritor now, but after her stunt taking down that train, it’s difficult to see anyone else taking it. Even Magath was impressed.” you hummed in agreement, thinking back to the battle. You’d been in the meeting with Command later that day, after Marley had finally taken control. You’d heard their worries about other nations adapting their weapons to surpass the power of titans. You’d also heard Zeke’s plan, and weren’t exactly quiet in your agreement.

“But those weapons… shot straight through my damn armour,” you hadn’t even noticed Reiner on the couch, nor Zeke next to him, for that matter. There was very little for you to grapple onto on the plains beyond the fort, so you’d been in the airship with the two Warriors. Before your enhancements, there was no way you could have taken out so many of the enemy and avoided titans at the same time, but due to your new reflexes and superior strength, it was a walk in the park. That was until Reiner couldn’t shield much, and Galliard had to step in and save your asses.

“Yeah well, I know you hate his guts, but I'm glad Pock was there. I sure as shit wouldn’t have made it out,” you shrugged, nursing your fresh coffee in the palms of your hands, the earthy aroma already doing wonders for your system.

“Noooo, I don’t believe it. You? Marley’s Super Soldier? You would have made it out in seconds,” you couldn’t curb your grin as you attempted to glare at Zeke, who was giving you a wry, knowing smile. You could only flip him off as Pieck joined the four of you. Reiner and Zeke instantly stood, allowing her to take up the couch and lie in a position most comfortable for her.

“Even I can’t do much against anti-titan machinery. I’m not bulletproof,”

“Neither’s Braun, apparently.”

You snorted into your mug, noticing the flat stare Reiner gave the War Chief just as Porco walked in, completing the group. Porco instantly looked suspicious.

“The hell is this all about?”

“What, we all can’t meet for some tea?” you snorted again at Zeke’s answer, before he took a seat at the table. You stayed leaning against the counter, grasping the top of your mug. It was a grip that earned you some of the weirdest looks from your comrades, but you can’t even remember why you held your mug like that, so what explanation could you give? It was just something weird you did.

“It’s interesting you brought up the weapons Reiner. The battle at Fort Slava showcased that. Any threat the titans used to pose to other nations is now becoming obsolete. They no longer surrender to us without a fight. We’re losing our tactical advantage as well as our strength.” –Zeke rose from his seat, crossing to put his empty mug on the countertop– “So we need to take back the Founding’s power from Paradis. Not only that but we can use their resources as well, and exploit the threat they pose to everyone. The Tyber family will provide us a voice.”

You blinked. The holders of the Warhammer? You couldn’t help but often wonder why they never used their power to aid Marley’s conquers. Known as the family that drove out King Fritz, wouldn’t it have benefitted them further to fight for Marley as well?

“The world will hear us out if we speak through the most beloved Eldian family. They’ve never used their power against enemy nations, so they should be supported by all.” you glanced at Pieck on the couch, nodding subtly in understanding. It was as if she had heard your internal question. Maybe she just knew you wouldn’t necessarily remember why they were your best chance.

“Astute as ever, Pieck, that’s exactly right. There'll be a festival held here in the next few days, foreign emissaries will come from all over to hear what Marley has to say. That’s when the Tybers will have their time in the spotlight–”

“And tell the world we’re declaring war… that’s what we’re doing isn't it? It’s a war declaration, on Eldia, in the Eldian residential section of Liberio. Showing the world even though we may have different blood… those islanders are on another. Nothing but savages.” you finished, eyes lingering on your half empty mug. You’d been sipping silently throughout the conversation until now, speaking up when you realised just what Marley had planned. Glancing up to Zeke, the blonde gave you a subtle nod. He wanted to speak with you after this.

“We’ll go over the details later. For now, I’ve told you all I know.” Another glance to you. Oh de definitely did not tell everyone all he knew. That’s fine. You were about to find out soon enough.

As if pulled by an invisible thread, the Warriors stood from their seats. Even Pieck, who reached for her crutch as she lifted herself from the couch. Sending you a cheerful wave, she followed the rest of the group out. To your surprise, so did Zeke, nodding his head for you to follow. It wasn’t until you were outside completely, breathing in the cool, fresh air, did he take you off to the side, around some secluded back area.

“You’re expecting an attack.” you didn’t wait for him to start talking as you leaned against the brick wall, folding your arms across your chest. “You’re trying to lure him out, Yeager, and you’re using the Tybers to do it. You don’t want them to declare war. You want it to be Eren.” Zeke surveyed you warily, as if trying to decipher what else you knew. So, with a sigh, you continued. “You think he’s already here, somewhere. And where he is, those island fuckers won’t be far behind. Either they’re in hiding, waiting to strike, or they’re on their way. There’s no complete guarantee that, even with the Tybers, everyone will fight for Marley. But have them declare war, and it’s basically a one versus the world.” you finished, your eyes downcast, staring at the worn grass.

Zeke let out an impressed huff, he too now turning to lean against the wall. “You’re smarter than you let on.”

“I make it my business to know what I need. Why not send me in? Take me to the island before they attack. All I need is a few days and they’ll be thrown in disarray. Let me take out their politicians and militants. Let me do what I do best. That way–”

“Does the name Levi Ackerman ring any bells?” You had heard that name, actually. A name Reiner mentioned once, when going over the details of that island four years ago. But other than those vague references…

No. Never.

A tilt of your head had Zeke nodding in understanding. “A Devil. One of their elite soldiers. He’s the reason we almost didn’t return.” you winced at the word we. Something you often forgot was that Zeke was there too, on that island, with Reiner and the other one. Bertholdt, you think his name was. And Annie, who never returned at all.

“I’m sorry Zeke… I forget that you were there too,” you murmured, earning yourself a soft, grateful smile from the blonde.

“Your enhancements… he’s the reason. He’s the reason we took such drastic measures on you. He’s the reason you lost your memories.” you stopped, breath hitching in your throat.

“But… wait, I thought I lost my memories from the concussion. You said–”

“We told you what we thought would save you from years of agonising over revenge. But no, it wasn’t from the concussion. I’m so sorry. You lost your memories when Marley was enhancing you, creating you into the super soldier you are today. One that can rival the power of Ackerman. You were bred to kill him.” you let his words sink in. All of them. The real cause of your memory loss, the lies you’d been fed to save you from yourself. That you were enhanced, bred, to shove your knife through this man’s throat. You didn’t care what Marley had done to you. You’d agreed to it years ago, admittedly you don’t remember but what reason could they have for lying to you? Your eyes hardened, jaw tensing as you raised your gaze to the blonde. There was no hint of deceit in his blue eyes.

“Will he be there? During the Tyber’s announcement and the attack. Will he be there?” you spat through gritted teeth, your bloodlust for revenge already bubbling in your gut. Zeke angled his head back a little, the sun reflecting in the lenses of his glasses.

“Yes. But charge in blind and you’ll wind up dead. Before the speech, I want you to suit up and hide amongst the rooftops. Wait for my signal, that will be your window. You won’t have long. Ackerman has no interest in anyone else but me. Something about revenge for killing someone close to him–”

“Good,” –you spat– “I’ll fucking kill everyone he’s close to. Bastard’s the reason I didn’t remember you, or Pieck, or Reiner, or even Annie and Bertholdt. He’ll get what’s coming to him. I swear it.” your fists clenched in your folded arms, nails biting into the calloused flesh of your palms. A hand on your shoulder drew you from your hatred, your muscles relaxing slightly at the comforting touch.

“You’ll get your chance, I promise. Marley needs him dead. We need him dead. Don’t let us down, Super Soldier.” all tension disappeared from your body as your hard expression broke into a fond smile. Taking a breath, you nodded in affirmation.

“Thanks Zeke, for letting me in on all of this. Does Command know?” you queried, but from the look on his face, and the way he briefly looked around, you assumed no. With another nod of your head, you turned to leave, feeling both heavy and light at the same time.

“Let me take you out for a drink after. To celebrate,” you stopped, your face a picture of humorous, yet incredulous disbelief.

“To celebrate what?!? The start of a war? Zeke I’m old enough to be your mother! A young mother maybe, but the sentiment is still there,” you laughed, placing a hand on your hip as you surveyed the man. Admittedly yes, he was attractive, but the mere thought of being with anyone just feels… wrong, for some reason. Whenever the idea crosses your mind you get an overwhelming sense of guilt.

“So? I want to get to know you better. Sue me,” you cocked your head to the side, confusion swirling in your eyes, a brow raised.

“You’ve known me for years, Zeke. I just don’t remember,” your smile turned a little sad as you looked away, missing the way the man stiffened as if he’d said something he shouldn’t have. But when your eyes returned, he was relaxed as ever as you rolled your eyes and turned away.

“So that’s a yes then?” you heard him call to you from behind. Another soft chuckle echoed through your system, yet that twisted guilt was still there. Maybe this was an opportunity to get rid of it? To finally move on from whatever your body remembered, but you didn’t.

“Survive and find out, Yeager.”

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