#no other series really has that ''everything is the exact same and also completely different''

[ultimateinferno]

I know the Zelda Timeline is hardly the most popular thing out there, but for me, it's always been endlessly fascinating. Everything is the same. It's all different. It's linear. It's cyclical. It branches and twists and comes back together. It disregards its predecessors. It can't let them go. It thrashes against change. It can't stay the same.

Every game is a reboot.

But they're also not.

I think the story of The Legend of Zelda is the epitome of narrative doublethink. In order to truly buy in, you must accept the simultaneous facets that none of the games matter to one another and that they all do. They're the same story. They're absolutely not.

The thing about the timeline, to me, by being both codified and nebulous, is what ties this cow tools of a narrative together. It's a puzzle without a box. It's total fucking nonsense, but so is reality. Things won't ever truly make sense, but what if they did. What if we took it from a new angle and... hmm. No. That won't work

Or maybe...

Ultimately, the Zelda Timeline is quite simply a farcical creative writing prompt. A dare. A challenge. To take these pieces not designed to fit together and give them order. Do the writers themselves care? Absolutely not. I do, though. So fuck it.

#zelda #the legend of zelda #tloz #loz #legend of zelda #ocarina of time #oot #breath of the wild #botw #a link to the past #alttp #tears of the kingdom #totk #like honestly its not really that confusing for me at large but patching up the holes is half the fun #no other series really has that ''everything is the exact same and also completely different'' #it scratches the parts of my brain that likes to piece together stories and worldbuilding #and also the part that likes to piece together science #like call this pretentious but real life is fucking nonsense too #this one is just a controlled environment

[funhouse-mirror-barbie]

Nuanced and Multifaceted Conflict vs. “Good v. Evil” in fiction

So. This is another thing I’ve wanted to talk about for a while. I promise I won’t always be focusing on Helluva Boss in my critiques, and I actually have quite a few other series I want to talk about.

There’s a big chance that I’ll be saying everything other people have already said, but I can’t help but WANT to talk about this specific character in regard to the story’s conflict. I think that it’s important to recognize when a character is written to be a complex person, and when a character is written to be an enemy to be defeated, and how not following through with your set-up can affect your story.

And HB does that A LOT in my opinion.

So. Let’s get into it. This time I’ll be talking about complex conflict between characters vs. black and white conflict, and I’ll also be touching on story set-ups and audience expectations.

I want to talk about a character who could have really made some of the internal character conflicts have so much more depth and intrigue. I want to talk about Stella Goetia

*as a side note this post is MUCH longer than I intended but I really wanted to get into a lot of the background and reasons for how Stella’s character development has actually completely changed what HB’d story conflict could have looked like. I’ll try and sum up everything in the end in a TLDR for y’all

So. Most of the reviews of her character I see talk about how she’s been “ruined” by the writing team revealing that she’s always been very abusive towards Stolas

I have to start off by saying I actually don’t think that Stella or her portrayal was “ruined” by the writing direction her character has been taken in.

In fact, this critique bothers me, because it doesn’t really get to what I think the actual root of why people are disappointed in Stella’s characterization, and the type of conflict that now exists between her and Stolas.

The main reason I believe people are unsatisfied with Stella is because they believed that her character was being set up for a complex and nuanced conflict between her and Stolas, and then that turned out not to be the case.

A quick disclaimer- I do think it’s possible to subvert audience expectations about story and characters in a satisfying way. But it has to be done in a way that respects the audiences intelligence and willingness to think about the story.

If your plot-twist, unreliable narrator, subversion, or what-have-you is done well, the audience should be able to either figure out what’s going based on the little information you’ve given them, and if they don’t, the change or subversion should still make sense and CLICK in hindsight.

Otherwise, your subversion will end up feeling cheap or confusing. Or worse, like a lie.

And this is one of the MAIN issues I think people have with Stella.

As the audience, we were NOT given enough information on her or her character before it’s revealed that she’s just “evil” and always has been, apparently since she was a literal child.

Again, I don’t think it’s an inherently bad decision to have a flat or pure evil villain. I’m fine with Stella being one, even if it’s less interesting to me personally.

But it’s definitely very different from what was initially implied and set-up, and the audience can pick up on that.

Before S2E1 “The Circus” we see Stella a total of 3 times in person, with one time being a flashback.

I’m going to go over those times to analyze if anything set-up in Stella’s appearances points towards her being. Well, totally and irredeemably awful and abusive I guess.

The very first time we see Stella is in the same bed with Stolas—Octavia calls for her parents, both Stolas AND Stella. Stella grumbles and refuses to get up and tells Stolas to go. This doesn’t immediately strike me as a sign of her being a terrible person. That exact scenario is present in a lot of family comedies, kids’ movies, and sitcoms.

Nothing about this screams that Stella is a terrible parent or an abusive partner to me. It just tells me she’s tired and doesn’t want to get up, which again, is not uncommon.

The next time we see her, she’s yelling at Stolas, and she throws a servant at him in anger.

Now, there’s no excuse for this, her behavior here is not okay, regardless of her feelings. But we understand why she’s acting the way she is--she’s furious with Stolas for cheating on her. At this point with the information we have, it’s also very reasonable to believe her feelings have been hurt.

Later Octavia talks about how her parents didn’t used to hate each other, and the way Stolas’ tries to explain their failing marriage to her comes across like his relationship with Stella is one that’s always had difficulties that they have tried and failed to overcome.

None of this information is enough to really convey or hint that Stella is and has always been abusive or evil. It shows that Stella and Stolas have a very rough relationship, and that Stella most likely has anger management difficulties, but you have to do lot of extra work to come to the conclusion that Stella is completely at fault here.

The next time we see her though, things have clearly escalated, because it’s revealed that she’s one that hired Striker to assassinate Stolas.

Now. Usually. Yeah. That would be a HUGE red flag. And I mean. It still obviously is.

But, and I never thought I’d use this uno reverse card, this is one of the few times where the explanation of “But it’s hell, what did you expect???” actually makes sense to me.

Because yeah, it is hell. It’s the end of episode 5 when we learn this, and our protagonists have killed and assassinated multiple people. Taking a hit out on people really doesn’t seem to be that uncommon of a thing in hell.

Even the next scene after the reveal that Stella is the one who hired Striker makes light of how serious this is, by showing that Stella was basically yelling her assassination plot right to Stolas’ face.

This is played for laughs! I genuinely am not sure if the writers intended for this to be foreshadowing of Stella’s abuse or not because if so, they turned her attempting to kill her husband into a joke!

If you cannot keep your themes or tone consistent, how is the audience supposed to follow your story?

There is subtle storytelling, and then there’s tacking information and character points later on in your writing. And this can have two causes.

Either your audience has to do the work of story-telling for you and make up their own reasons for what’s happening to make the story coherent OR they will be disappointed and dissatisfied by the final product.

I think that’s the main reason why S2E1 of Helluva Boss felt so jarring story-wise, and why Stella, to me at least, suddenly felt like a brand new character.

Like I haven’t been this confused by a character being suddenly evil since Hans from Frozen.

(like seriously why the hell did they put this scene in if not to just trick the audience. This isn’t giving us any plot info it’s only giving us contradictory info on his character. Like I talked about before, Hans’ heel-face-turn doesn’t feel like a twist. It feels like a lie.)

Okay so, how does any of this actually affect anything? Who cares if Stella is evil, that doesn’t automatically make the story bad!

Well. Yeah, of course not. Ironically, having the main conflict your story being a battle between “Good v. Bad” characters is neither good nor bad. It’s just a story decision. And ultimately at the end of the day, the writers of Helluva Boss can choose to tell their story however they’d like.

But, depending on how this is executed, good v evil stories can be a lot less interesting than morally grey or complicated conflicts and characters.

I am more interested in the version of the story where Stella and Stolas are imperfect and messy people. I am more interested in the story where Stolas has an affair to escape being in an arranged marriage, and Stella overreacts by arranging a hit on her husband (unless calling out a hit is normal in hell, but we can’t know b/c there is no baseline for what is considered normal in hell)

I am so much more interested in the story where Stolas and Stella are both depicted as being in the wrong, as being incredibly hurt by each other’s actions, and as not knowing how to repair their broken relationship for the sake of their daughter.

That story feels very real to me. It’s one I want to engage and invest in.

I want to see if these characters can grow to accept their mistakes and learn and change for the sake of Octavia and having to co-exist with each other, or if they’ll slip back into mutual destruction and toxicity.

But that’s not the story we’ll get to see, because it seems like the writers are more interested in keeping Stolas from having to grow as a character. And because of that, Stella has been turned into an evil obstacle that must be defeated, instead of a nuanced and real person.

I also feel like I have to say. I know I would be MUCH less frustrated by this if I hadn’t seen an HB crew member talking about how their show is similar to Bojack Horseman.

Because. It’s just not. I’m sorry, I’m not saying that to be mean, or condescending, or rude, but the way characters are written in Helluva Boss is almost completely black and white at this point.

Regardless of the writer’s intent, the vast majority of the choices they have made in Season 2 come off as explanations to excuse the protagonist’s mistakes, and give them a “get out of being potentially in the wrong” free card.

Compared to the writing decisions in Bojack, which almost always has characters confront their wrongdoings, for better or worse, HB honestly feels like it’s the Anti-Bojack.

It would take a TON of character development and time to make HB’s characters as interesting, fleshed-out, and as real as Bojack’s are, and at this point that’s I don’t think it will ever happen.

Again. Having black and white conflict is FINE. It is a choice in story telling that can be done very effectively. But if you are making a black and white story where one side is always terrible and evil, and one side can do no wrong, you can’t act like you’ve written something that is deeper and more emotionally complex and grey than that.

And the first time the writers gave Stella more than 3 sentences to string together, they made it very clear that any chance of her being a more complex and engaging character was being tossed out the window.

————

TLDR:

The main reason people are upset about Stella being shown as abusive in S2E1 of HB is probably because the initial depictions of her didn’t give us enough information on her character to tell that she was just evil/a terrible person.

The way the story was written in S1 to set up the possibility of a very interesting and complex conflict between Stella and Stolas, and when it was revealed that she’s just. The worst. There were people that were disappointed by this, because they expected more.

Audiences actually aren’t idiots, and when you subtly foreshadow something and then completely change things, that can be frustrating.

It’s MORE than okay to write a straightforward good v evil story, but it depending on the way it’s written and executed, it may not be as interesting to mature audiences as a more morally grey story would be.

If you can’t write characters confronting their flaws and being in the wrong, please don’t compare your writing to Bojack, I mean. C’mon.

#helluva boss critical #helluva boss critique #character critique #stella goetia #hb stella #helluva boss stella #media conversation #media critique #media criticism #writing female characters #writing critique #writing #funhouse convo

[downtroddendeity]

@turnkeyassurance saw your tags and figured I'd take the opportunity to pause my descent into madness to give my more sober opinions on the Ni no Kuni franchise, lol. (Warning: I am a humongous JRPG nerd)

The NNK games are really odd ducks, quality-wise. You can call either one a good game or a bad game and call either one better than the other, and any combination of those opinions can be something I think is entirely justified. Both of them have things they do remarkably well and also serious, profound, deal-breaking flaws, and the really weird thing is that there's almost no overlap between those two lists for the two games. What clicks and doesn't about both of them is going to be deeply individual.

What Ni no Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch does, with resounding success, is Vibes. It sets out at every single step with the goal of being a playable Ghibli movie, and it sticks to that principle. It's all about beautiful, cel-shaded whimsy. It's a game for people who want to feel like they're wandering through the meadows in the movie version of Howl's Moving Castle. There are lots of puns, and you can befriend all the random encounter monsters and feed them ice cream.

But that's also its Achilles' heel: because it's dedicated entirely to imitation, it has trouble bringing things to the table that are really its own. It has the visual and narrative aesthetics of Hayao Miyazaki's films, but it doesn't have the raw emotion at the heart of them. And as a game, its mechanics combine the clunkiest features of menu-based combat and action RPGs, and while everything about the Pokemon-esque mechanics seems designed to encourage players to collect and experiment with them, the balancing turns attempting to do that into a miserable grindy nightmare.

The other problem is that it... isn't actually the first Ni no Kuni game. Wrath of the White Witch is, in fact, a remake of the Nintendo DS game Ni no Kuni: Dominion of the Dark Djinn, which was never released outside Japan. The reason for this is pretty easy to explain, because DDD had another gimmick besides its aesthetics: it came with a real-life physical copy of the wizard spellbook, and the player had to look things up in it and draw sigils on the DS touchscreen to cast spells. So, we've got a high-effort remake that had to completely cut the central mechanic... and which also expanded the plot so that the original main villain was no longer the primary antagonist. This results in a game with what is very clearly a final dungeon and very clearly a final boss and very clearly a resolution to the story, which suddenly has a completely different plot dropped on it like a fucking anvil that it expects you to be just as invested in even though it hasn't had anything like the same level of buildup.

And ironically, this is almost the exact opposite of the biggest problem with Ni no Kuni 2: Revenant Kingdom, a.k.a. the one with my new blorbo, the President of the United Union of Eagleland. 2 is an effort to try to cement an identity for the series that can be its own, rather than requiring them to depend indefinitely on borrowed Miyazaki nostalgia. It just has the teeny-tiny, itsy-bitsy problem that at some point in development it had a budget shortfall so bad that you can finish the game without ever realizing that there is a continent-sized crashed interdimensional spaceship on the world map.

This game has had a machete taken to it. Don't get me wrong, I genuinely respect the work they did to make what they could with what they had, but you can see the signs of massive scope cuts to literally every aspect of the game. The back half of the game has almost exclusively recycled enemy and environment assets; voice acting has been trimmed down to canned voice clips; the catboy protagonist's ears and tail are barely animated; one minigame was so inadequately playtested that a level 16 mission is massively harder than level 50 ones; and while whatever restructuring they had to do to the main plot still left the final version with a more solid and coherent central arc than WWW in my opinion, it also left a lot of truly gaping plot holes, like oh, I don't know, why the President of the United States got turned into a 19-year-old.

Literally, they just. Entirely forgot to explain that. Half the DLC is just the writers scrambling to fix stuff like that and add a bunch of character development that should have been in the base game.

However, despite all this, I personally enjoyed NNK2 more than NNK1 unironically, not just for Rolandposting reasons. Compared to the first one, it plays much more smoothly as a straight action RPG, and while it can't provide the same knock-your-socks-off aesthetic cohesion, to me it seemed a lot more heartfelt- that is, like a game that was made because people had a story they wanted to tell.

But, well, we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for the non-unironic reasons, because the story they really, genuinely wanted to tell was about a magical catboy growing up and learning to become a leader, and somehow, miraculously, they really thought that was the story I was here for too when they opened the game with the President of the United States being isekaied by Nuke-kun.

Sorry, guys, I have a crippling addiction to dramatic irony and my day job is tech work in local politics, you could not have more laser-targeted this at making me specifically laugh my ass off if you tried.

#turnkeyassurance #reply #gameblogging #/ #// #ni no kuni #ni no kuni 2

[notebooks-and-laptops]

I'm thinking about the Andraste cult "the disciples of Andraste" who believe that Andraste is now reborn as a dragon and I honestly have so many questions.

According to this codex they're all completely mad because of "inbreeding" by the time we reach them in DAO, but we actually know surprisingly little about them other than the fact that a) they at some point turned away from worshipping the ashes to worshipping the dragon which got them locked out of the inner sanctuary and the gauntlet, b) they looked after the dragons young and eggs and the dragon and her children never attacked them but instead let them drink dragons blood to become revers d) they distrust outsiders and c) their chantry officials are male much like Tevinter but unlike Orlais.

It's implied that the village possibly practices human sacrifice in DAO, although the exact reasons are unspecified (to feed the dragon? Are their mages blood mages? Why? I have questions!!!) And it's also possibly they were just sacrifing outsiders (the knights of Redcliffe) who managed to find their village? Other than that, there is little to learn by walking through the original haven.

Nothing much more is revealed by the series of quests you can do on the wartable about Haven in Inquisition either (much to my own disappointment). They point to the fact that the cave systems and the temple were built pre-andraste, but they kind of trail off in a very unsatisfactory manner regardless of which agent you pick to complete them.

We also have Tamar who was imprisoned by the inquisition and then began to fight for them to secure her freedom. She has some very interesting dialogue:

"Your Chantry goes belly up, the Inquisition steps in. Always something to keep the same people in power."

"The gilded Chantry says only one truth exists. And its servants lie, steal, kill to make it so."

This reads almost identical to what I would imagine the Dalish might say; and cast the cult in a very different light to "inbreeded mad men". From these quotes and other context we get the idea that she belonged to a group who secluded themselves and kept their own traditions away from regular society, and so her people were slaughtered to preserve the chantrys "truth" and deny her own. Even with the dragon gone (possibly dead) she still believes in her cults traditions and is faithful!!!! (Let me talk to her more PLEAEE.) But regardless, this is about as sympathetic as the games really get towards this cult.

So....what were they? I'm so facinated by these guys.

Because like. They clearly have different ideas about magic, ideas possibly handed down from Andraste herself? Or ideas that developed later? Regardless they have many mages in their group and there isn't any evidence those mages are restricted in any way. If anything their mages are sent to do important things like be the main religious leaders or to impersonate Wylen. Their ideas might honestly be closer to the Avvar which would make some sense geographically (did they have contact with the Avvar? Did they trade with them? Farming would have been hard in their snowy mountains as we know from needing supply routes to Skyhold/Haven in DAI so other than hunting, did they have contact with these groups or not?)

And I have MORE questions!!! Did they have similar religious holidays to regular Andrastism? How did they see Andrastes death most pre and post the arrival of her reborn dragon self? Did their belief in reincarnation spread beyond the dragon (to people as well) or was it something special that had only happened to Andraste? Did they have any religious texts that were important - maybe oral history was particularly favoured in this group like with the Dalish? If so, any oral history dating back to Andraste would have died out when the cult itself did.

I want to anthropologically study these people so bad and like learn everything there is to know but unfortunately they are fictional and in a game and bioware doesn't seem to have any plans to develop them so :/

#dao #dai #dragon age

[genericpuff]

Genuinely curious as to if you asked permission to use Rachel’s characters and she said yes or if you just decided Lore Olympus is popular enough to make a fan comic of and are hoping you don’t receive a cease and desist? Can anyone create a remake comic of original content and just change what you don’t like about it and it’s considered legal if you say the characters belong to the original creator? There is plenty of disappointing media out there that could be remade. I understand you cannot use their characters for profit so is just posting it ok?

Yes, anyone can, because it's called fanfiction lmao Obviously in my case the term "fan" is being used loosely here as at this point it's more like "foe"fiction LMAO but the same principles apply. Unless I try to claim LO is my own creation or make a profit off Rekindled, I should be in the clear. If legal action was taken against me then it would set a precedent against all forms of fanfiction, rewrite, redraw, etc. content around LO which are all essentially doing the same thing Rekindled is doing. I think people tend to view Rekindled as somewhat of an "exception" that's vulnerable to legal action because it's an actual weekly comic put into practice in the same playing field as LO (though they're on massively different bases obviously LOL), but there's not much more separating it from the LO redraw accounts or even the genuine fan accounts that have learned how to draw in Rachel's style (and use it to make their own LO self-inserts and whatnot). I had the time and resources and experience to do what I do through Rekindled, but every redraw, rewrite, fanfiction, etc. account are making the exact same statement I am, whether intentionally or not - "I do/don't like the canon, but/so here's what I think it would be like if it went like this".

There is definitely plenty of media out there that could be remade, and a lot of them are by the fanfiction writers out there who are filling that niche within their respective fandoms. LO is the one I want to do because it's the one that interests me and compels me the most to rewrite.

Not to mention, it's already a bold statement in and of itself to say that I'm "using Rachel's characters", a statement that likely wouldn't hold up in court LMAO Her "characters" are literally just stylized self-insert versions of public domain figures. She did not write The Hymn to Demeter. She did not create Hades, or Persephone, or Hecate, or any of the other characters she writes about. She does not own an entire religion or its deities. The only thing that she really "owns" is the licensing rights to the name "Lore Olympus", and while the style of LO is very unique and identifiable, you can't trademark/copyright a style because that uproots the entire foundation of what art is (ironically no one has had an original idea SINCE the Greeks, we all just learn and adapt our styles based on other artists that we get inspired by and learn from).

Shit, there are series completely unrelated to LO that get harassed or otherwise warned that they could cross into "legal territory" with LO just because they're Greek myth comics. Punderworld, Theia Mania, H x P Ficlets, all of these are comics that also tackle the H x P myth, and while they aren't attempting to do the same thing as Rekindled (as they exist on their own terms) it's really disappointing when I see people talk about these comics purely through the scope of Lore Olympus as if LO invented Greek myth. If WT/Rachel tried to pull rank over the story's "characters", they'd be picking a fight with every other Greek myth comic, book, movie, etc. and they oughta know that's not a fight they're gonna win lol

So everything beyond LO's branding is, in and of itself, fanfiction. Rekindled is just another level deeper by being fanfiction of a fanfiction. As long as I'm not profiting off Lore Olympus' namesake or distributing my work with the misconception that I created LO, it's legally fine. Morally, I'm sure it doesn't exactly make me a saint to do it, it definitely took a lot of hubris for me to say "yeah I don't like how you wrote your story enough that I felt the need to rewrite it completely" and I wouldn't blame anyone for thinking doing so is icky. There are certain lines I won't cross - I don't use the general LO hashtags because my content is very critical and my work isn't really for the fans, I don't encourage anyone to "show Rachel" what I do here because none of what I do here is obligated to be seen by her (and I know it wouldn't be in her best interest to see it anyways, she's literally said that she doesn't like criticism so why tf would I wanna show her a comic that exists to criticize her work lol), and I'm not planning on posting it to Webtoons because that's Rachel's territory. I don't want to overstep both in the legal sense and in the moral one. I think it's more than enough for me to just post my stuff here for the people who are seeking it, and not profit off it or directly affiliate it with LO/Rachel beyond crediting.

All that said, in a moral and legal sense, what I'm doing is literally the basis of fanfiction, and I wouldn't be going to such lengths and spending this much time every week putting out episodes every week if I never cared about LO and how it made us all feel, even if some of us don't love it as much as we used to.

#also just as some food for thought and because i couldn't find a place to fit it in the post #sonic mania ended up being one of the best games in the sonic franchise in over a decade and it was made by a sonic fangame dev #a lot of shakespeare's most beloved plays were also 'stolen' from other works #and don't get me started on the screenwriting industry #many of the books they adapt into film are completely rewritten from weaker source material or material that just won't work in movie form #obviously sometimes it's for worse and not better #but rewriting works you're dissatisfied with is an age old tradition IMO #fifty shades of grey exists and it was literally twilight fanfiction when it started LMAO #innovation is found in fandoms #i could just be haphazardly defending myself tho LOL maybe i'm just an asshole #lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus #antiloreolympus #ask me anything #ama #anon ama #anon ask me anything #lore rekindled #lore rekindled comic #lore rekindled ama

[tavyliasin]

The Scent of Cinnamon 4 - The Morning, The Tailor, and The Fit of the Glove

Raphael wakes up to the consequences of the deal he made the night before, and realises Haarlep has no clothes to wear save for his own which are somehow a poor fit on his copied body. A trip to Waterdeep sparks more conflict as the two fiends begin to find their places with each other, pushing each others boundaries. Haarlep also has to reckon with the consequences of their end of the bargain, with shadows of their past biting at their heels. 5,139 Words - AO3 Link Click Here

--- Summary: The pair head out to Waterdeep to a tailor who can make something for Haarlep to wear other than Raphael's old clothes that feel like a poor fit on the incubus' borrowed body. Pairing: Raphael/Haarlep SPICE Rating: 0.5/5  Content Warnings: Mild Power Play, Mild Angst,

Spoilers Vague House of Hope and Act 3, but most of this series is focused on what came before. Canon Compliance The mention of a certain mad mage should match up roughly to the time he was actively in Waterdeep. But even the official lore is inconsistent on that one so we're running Rule of Cool. Also, the perfume is the exact canon scent according to 2 pieces of in game lore (Yurgir saying Raphael smells of cherry, and a letter of Raphael's that carries the scent of Palmarosa and Black Pepper in his perfume) Other Notes This is really to explore the dynamics between the two as they get to know each other outside the boudoir...don't worry, they'll be back there soon enough.

Song Pairing Everything You Hate by Project Vela "Looks like the time has come to pull the plug on the weak Your independence gone, control is not what it seems It's time to rise up and take it into the streets The life support is cut, the transformation complete

My actions don't seem so clean You're out there pulling the strings Anything any cage that couldn't hold Has escaped and it's out of your control Everything you ever hoped that you could be Only exists in a fake reality

You and I are one and the same One reflection bound by different names Recognised that you have become everything you hate Everything you hate"

--- FULL CHAPTER BELOW THE CUT --- ---

The Morning, The Tailor, and The Fit of the Glove

Raphael stirred in his sleep, suddenly aware of an unfamiliar weight resting on his leg. It felt like his tail was draped over something too, yet there was nothing beneath when he tested moving it. The awareness of his own body began to spread through his consciousness, piece by piece. There were ghosts where aches might have been, even if pain had healed his muscles still felt the echoes of whatever it was he had-

Whoever it was. And that who was snoring quietly on the pillow beside him, their tail draped over his leg, their hand resting lightly on his waist. 

The previous day came rushing back as the last vestiges of a far more peaceful dream were banished from the cambion’s reeling mind. His eyes blinked open to see exactly what he was dreading: the imperfect mirror of his own face, a slight smile tugging at the corners of copied lips, but a different scent drifting on their warm breath.

Cinnamon. 

Ah. That was it. The incubus and their deal, the contract signed in ink and in lust, his body the very page that they had inscribed their presence upon. 

Raphael almost expected their eyelids to reveal the vivid emerald as they began to slowly open, but instead there was only the infernal fire burning around their pupils as they met his gaze.

“Mmm~ I could get used to this~” They purred, stretching their wings lazily behind them before pulling the sheets closer around them.

The cambion already felt his ire rising. He might have invited this…this…Harlot to his bed, but that did not give them the right to treat it like a luxury resort. He kicked his leg free of their tail and threw the covers off the pair of them as he forced his exhausted body out of the comfort and warmth of the night.

“Five more hours~” Haarlep pulled the sheets back over them, covering their face, but not before he caught the hint of a grin spreading across it.

“Petulant creature.” Raphael waved his hands in a swift motion, a few brief words tugging the threads of the Weave into ripping the covers from the incubus’ grip, tossing them out of reach on the floor. 

“Spoilsport.”  They groaned, brows furrowing and the fire in their eyes flashing dangerously as they scowled at him. “I am the one with the power in this room, by your own contract’s terms.” 

“And do you wish to spend your days in here completely nude?” Raphael was already pulling on the fresh clothes that had been set aside for him. A modest outfit, but one that nonetheless showed his figure. “Or will you concede that you need at least one outfit you feel comfortable in? My clothes will fit you, but I suspect they are not to your taste.”

“Clothing is hardly a necessity for my line of work~ Do you not like what you see, Archduke?” It seemed the incubus had no intention of ceasing their insulting nickname, a completely transparent attempt to rile him up. “Made to your very own specifications, no less! Aren’t you curious what it might feel like to-”

“No.” He snapped, turning away as he continued to fuss over the fastenings of his shirt, frustrated by his fingers refusing to obey him. He wasn’t ready to accept that the incubus was flustering him, even the shadow of that thought entering his mind was more infuriating than the sound of their voice. His voice. Not his voice… They were like an echo, distorted by the landscape it ricocheted from. Within every word, he could still hear-

—

“Let me help you, then.” Haarlep had grown tired of trying to cling to the comforts of silk sheets for now. Their lips just brushed the pointed tip of Raphael’s ear as they wound their arms around his waist to fix the fastenings he was having such trouble with. “There. Not that difficult, was it?~” The cambion shivered at their touch, stepping quickly away from where their naked body had pressed against his back, but their tail wound around his wrist to turn him back to face them. “Could you not-” 

“Wait.” They cut him off again, firm yet soft. His collar was crooked… The incubus carefully straightened the piece, pulling the ruffles into place and ensuring they were even. “The master of the house has appearances to keep up, does he not?” 

“Quite so.” Raphael clawed back his dignity with the reply, reaching forward to fix Haarlep’s hair, even though they both well knew that not a strand was out of place. “You will have to wear something for now. Wait here.” 

Haarlep watched as he strode confidently to an old armoire, searching through a variety of finery that was neatly pressed and stored within. It seemed most of the options were objectionable, until he pulled out a simple outfit in a near-black tone. It would have looked absurdly severe on the cambion himself, a poor match for the line of his jaw or the hint of apprehension in the expression above it. “It will do, for now.” 

“Beggars, Harlot, make for poor choosers.” He held it out at arm’s length, clearly trying to avoid the ire in the incubus’ gaze.

“The day I beg you for anything, all of Avernus will be colder than Cania.” Haarlep snatched the outfit from the cambion’s claws, quick to remind him in every moment of his place in this room, loathe to leave the one space they retained control. 

“Perhaps if you play your role well, you will have no need to do anything more than ask.” Raphael turned away, as if to give them privacy to put on their clothes. An absurd notion at this point, but nevertheless they began to dress as he continued. “We have our deal, there is no reason for us to be adversaries, you know.”

“Hmmm maybe so,” Haarlep wound their arms around his waist again, half dressed but their shirt still open, claws teasing at his hips as they held him close. “But it’s so much more fun to feel you squirm like this~” 

“Degenerate.”  Raphael’s tail swung around and whipped their thigh - hard enough to be felt, but not to hurt. He gasped. “Mmmm harder~” Haarlep moaned in his ear, relishing at the shiver they felt beneath their fingertips, drifting lower already. “You won’t even feel the pain, just the pleasure.”

—

The cambion shuddered. They were right, he felt a brief but clear rush of heat… “Absurd.” He lied.

“There’s the trick, Archduke,” Haarlep purred, the bitch dropping to an even more seductive tone. The imitation of his voice barely sounded familiar, the tone of their previous voice snaking through his senses far stronger while he couldn’t see them behind him. “It’s only arousing because your body likes it. The pleasure I feel is yours, in more ways than one. Don’t you want to try it out? Find the limits of your own debauchery-” 

“We are going to be late if you don’t stop this nonsense.” Another lie, though this one was more believable than the last. The tailor would wait as long as necessary, he had enough of a hold on them that they would not consider turning him away even if he marched them out of bed to sew a ballgown in the middle of the night. “Fine~ Have it your way.” Their touch left him immediately, his body suddenly colder for the lack of their warmth pressing against him. It took conscious effort to stop his tail from reaching out to find them. “Then tell me, if we are to rush to this appointment of yours… Will this suffice?” 

Raphael turned around to take a look at the incubus dressed in an outfit he had not considered wearing in decades. It was a little tight on them, and the shirt had been left half open to expose part of their chest in a way that had no right to be so tempting. Their tail was twitching impatiently, yet their wings spread behind them as they struck a swift pose and flashed him a grin. He turned away again, reluctant to look any longer in case their eyes alone drew him closer. Outside the room he would be in control again…at least on the surface. “Come.”

“Hah! I’m not that easy-” 

“You know precisely what I meant.” He stepped beyond the door and into the hallway, subconsciously standing a little taller and straighter as he wore the power of his title like a monarch’s cloak. “Hurry up.” 

—

Haarlep followed Raphael through the House until they arrived at a room with a shimmering portal, several short steps leading up to it. 

“An easier method of transportation, no point in wasting energy on magic when permanent spells can be cast.” The cambion waved dismissively towards the huge arch and the warped reality within it. 

“And where, precisely, does it lead?” Haarlep eyed it suspiciously, unwilling to play a game of ‘follow-the-leader’ without at least some idea of whether they would be treading the ice fields of Cania or the muddy streets of a Halfling village.  “Waterdeep.” Raphael replied simply, stepping forwards and stopping just short to beckon them to hurry. “I did not take you for one so hesitant.” “And I did not take you for someone to rely on mortals for your tailoring.” They didn’t bother to keep the disdain from their voice, although they did step obediently forwards all the same.

“One more thing,” the cambion turned to face them, a swift casting of a spell rendering them completely invisible. “You are not permitted to speak until we arrive.” 

Haarlep pursed their lips, hands forming some swift and unsavoury gestures to spell out their displeasure without any verbal component.

“I can see invisibility, Haarlep. Know your place.” Without further warning, Raphael transformed his body to his human guise - clothes shifting to fit the smaller frame - and walked through the portal.

—

The room was dusty and poorly kept, despite Raphael’s strict instructions - he made a note in the back of his mind to have stronger words with the diabolist maintaining his portal in what should have been the upper floors of a well kept mansion. Boxes were piled to the sides, half open and half labelled in scrawled handwriting. 

“That looks like the writing of a madman.” Haarlep’s shimmering form stood beside him, peering at one of the boxes. “Not entirely inaccurate,” Raphael ceded the point, but not without irritation. “You were, however, told explicitly to be silent.” 

“First, we have ‘arrived’, so you should be more specific if you mean another destination.” The whisper of their smirk was more audible through their tone than it was visible on their face as he felt a dull ache nagging at the back of his skull. “But that aside, this place is clearly uninhabited. There’s no risk of being discovered.”

“Must I train you in both manners and obedience?” He turned to face the warped space that concealed Haarlep’s insolent form from most onlookers. 

“Hardly necessary. Besides,” they stepped close, strong hands taking a grip of his jaw and moving his mouth with their words. “If you move those lips just right it will seem as if you’re the one talking, given how you have burdened me with your own voice.” 

Raphael swatted their hands away, fixing his hair and collar quickly as he tried to keep his emotions in check. “If I must remind you to behave once more, you will live in that outfit for your first decade. Or perhaps you would rather never leave that room, if you are so hellbent on retaining your control? I do not have to cross the threshold, nor do I have to send anyone in to sate your needs unless I choose to.” 

—

Haarlep bristled. They knew that he had power and control, that both of their deals now bound them to him with all the fine print that came with it, but they had not considered that the young and overconfident fiend would…would… 

—

Raphael faltered. He could feel the tension, the change in their demeanour in an instant. They still stood behind him wearing his body, but it now seemed like a poorer fit on them than the clothing that groaned at the seams. Even their stature seemed to shrink back in that moment, the unseen shadow of their presence retreating.

An unusual sense scratched the back of his mind. Guilt? Unthinkable. And yet… 

“I am no tyrant, incubus. Stick to your word and I shall be true to mine. But no more words for now, not until I dispel the invisibility shrouding your form.” He began to lead the way, loathe to waste any more time. Halaster could be reprimanded later for leaving the portal in such a state. 

—

It took half an hour before they reached their destination. The sun was far too bright, the incubus cursing that invisible wings could do nothing to stop the wretched beams from searing their eyes. Haarlep kept quiet for the remainder of the journey, following carefully in step behind Raphael, wings and tail tucked in so they would not catch a passer-by unawares.

For his part, the cambion acted much as a human noble might. He strolled down the streets as if he owned them and all who walked through them. Every now and then, he stopped to greet someone, to slip a note into a hand, or to show his disdain or appreciation for the quality of goods on market stalls. 

But for their own part, Haarlep was an invisible shadow. They stalked behind him with heavy steps as if their own feet fit as poorly as the boots upon them. Every now and then, they stopped with him to adjust their shirt, to rub at their head from the weight of the horns above, or to swallow back the worry that he might decide to leave them locked up to starve after all. 

The bell of the shop rang with a disgustingly joyful tinkling, crinkling their nose into a grimace. Luckily, they were able to fix their expression into something more neutral as Raphael removed the invisibility spell that kept them hidden. 

“So,” the tiefling shopkeeper peered over her glasses, “this is what all the fuss is about?”

“Uphold your bargain and you will find your competitor out of business by the end of the tenday.” Raphael replied, before gesturing towards the incubus. “They require proper clothing. Should you supply something that meets their needs, you will have my repeat business.” 

“Surely someone in one of the hells would be a more appropriate choice to dress a devil such as yourself.” She shrugged, stepping around the counter nonetheless. Her outfit, Haarlep noted, was plain but well fitted. A measuring tape was draped around her shoulders, and numerous pins were strategically held in the apron of her dress along with a couple of pouches holding scissors and threads. 

“They are not me. Which is information that will not be leaving this room, unless you particularly relish the idea of centuries in the hells as a pathetic lemure.” His voice left no room for argument, a confidence that seemed a strong contrast to the whimpering and begging mess he had been at the end of the previous night. Haarlep watched closely. They had a role as a spy to uphold, after all. 

“They look exactly like you.” The tailor walked around Haarlep now, assessing them in a way that felt far too much like their first meeting with Raphael the day before. Their tail flicked behind them, still unused to the smooth tip in place of the arrowhead shape of their own body. Their body…which now seemed more like an outfit that had been zipped up into a neat little bag and stored away in a locked closet out of their reach. But he had the key. That’s all that mattered.

“You need new glasses, they look nothing like me.” Raphael’s absurd response snapped Haarlep back out of their thoughts. He transformed swiftly into his fiendish appearance, and gestured to the incubus as the tiefling looked back and forth between the two. “See? The ruse would only fool someone who lacks insight.” 

The tiefling seemed to agree to appease him as she began to take notes on the fittings in a small book from her pocket. Haarlep, on the other hand, was stuck on his words. They were a near perfect copy, they knew that. The deal they made was important, and they had made sure to memorise his body as carefully as he had theirs…though perhaps… His eyes met theirs for a moment, a light hint of a blush behind already crimson cambion cheeks. 

—

“You should undress.” The tailor stepped back and gestured to a partitioned area of the store, as Raphael pulled his gaze from the incubus’ blazing eyes. 

He was perplexed. How did she not see the obvious differences? This wasn’t a mirror before him - not quite. He swore he could see the green in the depths of their eyes, the curve of their jaw and shape of their ears a little sharper of an angle than his own. The way they moved was certainly no copy, either… That would need some work later, he decided. The sway of their hips was decidedly too seductive-

“You didn’t tell me what you want me to make for them.” The tiefling was eyeing him over the rim of her glasses. “There was all the rush to be available immediately, but as you are unsatisfied with them wearing your own clothes I assume it is to be something different. Something bespoke.” 

“What do you think?” Raphael looked down at her, for a moment forgetting to choose his words more carefully to keep the power balance strongly in his favour.

“Clothes have a purpose, Raphael. They must not only fit the wearer, but be appropriate for the role they must fill. One who is your copy, yet is not supposed to fill your usual role? I need more information than that.” She tapped her pen on her notebook, not bothering to turn around as Haarlep stepped out from behind the screen in only the loose silken underwear he’d given them. Even those seemed like a terrible match…

“Start from the undergarments. My outer clothes will suffice for any other needs for a time.” He gestured over to the incubus standing proudly, and almost entirely naked, in the middle of the shop. 

—

“Arms out.” The tiefling was clearly unperturbed by Haarlep’s almost naked form as they followed her instruction, mildly amused at the little stepladder she had to use to reach their shoulder. Raphael had taken a seat over to one side, watching closely but mostly leaving the woman to her work.

“If he told you to work from undergarments, why do you need the measure of my arms?” They couldn’t help but feel perplexed by her choice.

“It would be a shame to cover you up, what with all these muscles,” she cast a tentative glance at Raphael for a moment though he seemed not to care in the slightest, “but clothing doesn’t just cover. The right garments can enhance what you have instead.” 

Haarlep laughed, the first genuine moment of amusement all day breaking the tension that had been eating at the back of their mind. “I assure you, I do not need any of my anatomy to be enhanced.” They licked their lips seductively and glanced down. “I can prove it, if you like~” 

“Not here, Harlot.” Raphael snapped, earning their impudent tongue-out expression as a response. “Just…work with her. Find something you would be comfortable in.” 

Their expression changed just as quickly again, switching to one of quiet contemplation. Comfort? He hadn’t been concerned with their comfort before now. Even in his sleep, it had been a fight to keep enough of the sheets to cover themselves. The contract had been business, the deal itself pleasure, and all they shared since was…confusing was about the only way they could describe it.

“What would you like? Are there any materials or styles you prefer? Or is there a particular look you wish to emulate?” The tiefling had largely ignored their quips and offer, measuring their chest and waist easily, now wrapping the tape around their hips. 

“Leather has its appeal…” Haarlep considered the options, the purpose they would have in Raphael’s deals. “Something close fitting - cover as little as you can - and it must project power.” Their eyes flashed across to their Master, as he would call his role, who remained nonplussed…aside from the momentary flick of his tail betraying a hint of the thoughts behind his calm expression.

“Is that agreeable?” The tailor turned to Raphael herself now, looking for his approval as the one purchasing the garments.

“Whatever they want. I will reserve my judgement for when I see the look complete.” Even his voice was measured and calm. “Do you have everything you need?” 

“Yes, yes. That will do.” She finished measuring their inner leg with a quick and practised motion, avoiding any intimate contact much to Haarlep’s disappointment. They were wondering if the cambion might squirm in his seat if they let themselves get a little excited by the simple touch-

“Go and get dressed again. There is more to do.” Raphael distracted them from their amused thoughts. It was hard not to roll their eyes at his tone, but they held their reaction in check for now. 

Until they could be certain, until they had proof of what he was really going to be like… They didn’t want to test their luck. Though they were sated now - the deal had been more than an adequate feast - their body still remembered hunger. Their nerves recalled too easily how they could ache if left untouched, unfed. Their heart was far too familiar with the hurt of trying to get by with nothing but their name and a bare shred of hope that they were still pretty enough to secure a meal...

And now they didn’t even have that name, nor the body they cared for so carefully to ensure they wouldn’t starve.

The clothes they pulled on behind the screen once more felt as ill-fitting as their skin, laced with those same clashing scents that Raphael wore to cover the hint of the infernal that lingered around any who travelled in and out of the hells. 

At least that was something they might be able to change.

—

Raphael paid the tailor an advance for the materials, tracking in his mind exactly which pawns he would need to move to ensure the rest of that deal was upheld. Behind him, the incubus seemed just as uncomfortable as they had been in front of the portal, when he had snapped at them. 

He sighed and rubbed at the wrinkle forming at the bridge of his nose. He would need to be more careful with how he treated the spy. It didn’t matter much what Mephisto found out from them, but if he were to be so foolish as to allow himself to spend the night naked and vulnerable with them again… A shudder crept uninvited down his spine as he cast the invisibility upon them once more. That was dangerous. Foolish. If he were to die here in the streets of Faerun it would be little more than a painful inconvenience. He would simply reappear in Avernus.

But if he were to be slain in the hells? 

He pushed the thought from his mind, resolving himself to be more careful. Haarlep must know their place, but should not be backed into a corner. They were strong, cunning, and they were likely to learn more of his own weaknesses by living in his body. 

“Before we go,” they almost startled him, unseen hand on his shoulder and voice quiet near his ear, “I should like to stop at a perfumery.” 

“And why would that be?” Raphael hissed back, pausing with his hand on the door.

“Your fragrance… It isn’t quite right. There are too many scents in there battling for dominance. You should have something complex, but not overwhelming.” Haarlep didn’t sound insulting, despite the implications of their words. 

It took barely a moment to cast Sending, projecting his voice to their mind and allowing the reply to come back to him silently from their thoughts. Perhaps conversing might be acceptable like this, especially on his own terms as he would have to initiate each part. 

—

It took a while to find a place that Haarlep approved of. Raphael even seemed willing to indulge them in a little more casual conversation as they walked, the sendings passing back and forth. In truth, the first shop might have been truly atrocious but the second was more than acceptable. Yet here they were, at the door to the fifth.

“Please tell me this one is good enough for you. I have contracts to write and precious little time to waste on further frivolous ventures.” Somehow Raphael always seemed to use up every one of the 25 words the spell allowed, his voice echoing in their head. 

For a moment, Haarlep wondered if their reply would sound like they did now, the echo of Raphael’s own deep tones filtering into his mind like his own thoughts betraying him, or perhaps… “It seems like it will suffice. As long as nobody tries to spray you as soon as you walk through the door. Again.” 

They slipped through the door behind him as he entered the shop, careful not to allow the door to remain open for a suspicious amount of time. They kept their steps light and took a good look around the place. It might not have been as substantial as the third establishment, but they were fast running out of options.

“As you are so insistent that I require something different, I suggest you tell me what the ingredients might be, Harlot. Make it quick, though.”

“Pick up the bottles I point at and hold them so I can sniff them.” Haarlep replied quickly, already pointing to a few. 

“Can I help you?” The elderly shopkeeper was watching Raphael closely, and seemed anxious in his silence.

“If I bring you several of your scents, can you make something based on those?” Raphael gestured to the shelves as he asked, earning a smile from the man behind the desk as he continued. “I will, of course, pay you handsomely should your perfume meet my exacting standards.” The flicker of his eyes towards the incubus was for them alone this time, but the perfumier seemed to already be counting his profits. 

“Yes, yes! Go ahead, I have many years of experience, I’m sure I can mix just the thing for you!” 

Without the sending to reply to, Haarlep could only gesture invisibly as needed. Several bottles were pulled from shelves and opened with dramatically wide gestures to waft the scent closer to where they stood. 

It was difficult to decide, but there had to be a balance. The cherries suited him, and something strong would have to disguise the hints of the hells that carried on his clothes and skin after travelling between planes. Something spicy too, and the blend needed an allure that could draw in a wide range of potential clients.

And, naturally, it mustn’t clash with cinnamon. 

All of this was relayed to the perfumier who made notes with impressive speed for a man of his years, selecting and rejecting several of the bottles himself. Eventually he seemed ready to mix a selection of oils into a glass flask, balancing it out with the base and blending the scents carefully. 

“Palmarosa, black pepper, cherry…” 

“The contents matter less than the result. May I?” Raphael took the bottle that was handed over, waving it dramatically through the air once more. “Ahh, interesting.” He looked over to Haarlep, finally allowing a Sending. It was not lost on them how he controlled even their private communication for now… “Well? I have no objections to this one. Quite to the contrary, it seems very fitting. I may concede that you both have adequate taste.” 

“Finally,” they began, unable to hide their frustration at being left to mime for so long. “It’s close, but it needs one more thing. Not much, but it needs some cinnamon. If I am to play your role, that is…”

“Agreed. There must be as few loose ends as possible. Our scents should match as closely as our appearance, voice…” This time he didn’t use the limit of the spell’s words. He seemed momentarily torn and distracted before he stopped pretending to sniff the bottle and handed it back to the man waiting expectantly at the counter. “A little cinnamon, and that will suffice.” 

“Of course!” The perfumier seemed delighted by the suggestion. “Warmth and spice, to balance out the bitter and cold edge, an unusual blend but it should work quite nicely, quite nicely indeed!” 

—

Several very long minutes later, the pair were back out on the street with a small bag in hand and an order left with the Perfumier to prepare a much larger batch along with some infused soaps and candles. 

The journey back to the portal was somewhat swifter and than before, but at least the time of day meant the sun was now more of a pleasant warmth than a blinding presence above. Raphael kept a swift pace, though with his human guise his stride was somewhat shorter than the incubus’ who had a far more relaxed stroll behind him.

The mansion holding the portal was just as empty as it had been before, and Raphael made a mental note to contact Blackcloak soon. The mage might have been driven mad in the past, but he was still powerful, useful, if he remembered to hold up his end of certain contracts. The cambion shuddered… Halaster had once come far too close to binding him into service. That would not stand. Neither would he allow-

Haarlep tapped his shoulder. A quick gesture and mime a reminder that they were following his instruction not to speak out loud. 

Raphael dismissed the invisibility and turned to face the incubus. They were quiet a moment longer, expression unreadable as they awaited his instruction. “The day appears to have passed us by far faster than intended.” He broke the silence first, the insignificant statement preferable to the uncomfortable stagnation of the air hanging heavily around them as if still carrying the echoes of earlier words spoken in haste. “Well, time does fly, so they say.” Haarlep shrugged, a hint of mischief tugging at their lips once more. “I always favoured the night, anyway.” 

--- --- ENDING NOTES --- --- A little more angst and plot for our dear incubus, but the night is theirs and that's where the next chapter will lead.

Keep Reading the Next Chapter Here!

#baldurs gate 3 #bg3 fanfiction #haarlep #bg3 raphael #the scent of cinnamon #fanfic #bg3 #prequel #bg3 prequel #Spotify

[galladegamer]

HUGE DHMIS SPOILERS AHEAD

I think I might've figured it out.

I was thinking about the possible story with Lesley and how Yellow guy runs on batteries when I realized...what if the different episodes' subjects have something to do with it? So here's my theory: Once, there was a family (Episode 3). The mom was named Lesley, the dad was named Roy, and the kid was named David (the name on the tombstone and the D on yellow guy's shirt) (another thing to note is that in episode 3, Duck shows pictures of a random family, which could possibly be Lesley, Roy, and David). Lesley was at work (Episode 1) so Roy told David to make friends with the neighbors (Episode 4). The neighbors gave David a bird (little baby pigeon?) who flew into the street. David chased after the bird, but in a series of gruesome events, was hit by a car (Episode 5) and died (Episode 2). This is what we saw in that one Claymation scene in episode 5 (notice how panicked Lesley sounds in this scene, as if she's losing a son, which if this theory is true, she is). Roy becomes quiet and reclusive, metaphorically eating up whatever family they have left (just like how he ate the family in episode 3). Lesley, meanwhile, has to go to therapy (Carehound). This didn't work (notice how nonsensical the elevator's therapy speech is) so she decided on a DIFFERENT coping mechanism. She decided to bring her son back (like how Yellow guy brings duck back in episode 2 (which is also the exact same way that Lesley puts a replacement duck figurine there in episode 6 (notice how both times their heads get taken off))). What she did was she make a new version of David. A robotic version (Episode 6). She then decided to give her new robotic son (not biological, which is the reason for the "You're not my real son" outburst. Notice she doesn't say "You're not my son", she says "You're not my REAL son"). She decided to make a reboot of a show her kid once starred in. A show created by her husband and a friend of his. A show called "Don't Hug Me, I'm Scared." Red Guy doesn't know he's in a show this time, which is why he's more aloof now.

Then we get to the book. I have three different theories on what that book could've contained before it got shredded.

An incantation for the council

This is basically if everything I just said was completely wrong and instead it's some sort of demonic thing about something. Not much to say here, except that if it's true, then maybe it's a good thing that yellow guy shredded it.

2. The script

This one is one that I personally really like. It would make sense after all. The thing is that there isn't much to say about it other than that.

3. A scrapbook

This one might seem weird, but there's a chance that it's a scrapbook of David when he was alive. It would work with my current theory and I think it would also work with how Lesley acts. She would like Yellow Guy to know who he once was. The only thing that strains this option is why would she want the others to see it? Would it really matter if they did?

This multiple theory thing goes for the stairs too, because I have some theories on who could be a floor above Lesley.

The council

If you remember, in Episode 2, Lamp speaks about some organization named the council. I think at some point in Episode 5, someone talks about "the ancient ones" as well, but I can't remember very well. They seem like such weird comments that they can't just be jokes.

2. The director

There's a chance that Lesley isn't the only one working on this show. There could be a director that works on the basic scripts and then Lesley fine tunes them.

3. Roy

Seeing as Roy is Yellow guy's dad this could also be very likely. Who knows? Maybe Roy IS the director.

So that's my personal theory about the Don't Hug Me, I'm Scared TV show. I only saw each episode once, so it's not completely fine tuned just yet, but I still think it could all be very interesting, especially since there are still things I have yet to talk about. Here's a list of other possible things that could be important.

Why would an uncle be "in the distance" in episode 3?

The big boy and bigger boy rooms aren't just one off jokes, they appear in Lesley's model of the home.

Was yellow guy always smart? After all, he was only dumb because of bad batteries.

Why was red guy so desperate to leave the house in episode 5?

In episode 2 of the original YouTube series, Yellow guy says "My dad is a computer." Is Roy a robot too? Does the original YouTube series even have anything to do with the TV series?

After Lesley said yellow guy wasn't her real son, she said she was kidding.

Why can dumb yellow guy see smart yellow guy in reflections and vice versa?

The shovel appeared as a teacher in DHMIS 6 of the original YouTube series

Speaking of the shovel, did Lesley dig up David's corpse and use it to make the robot like how Yellow guy digs up duck?

All of these questions are being left without answers, which is why we all try to answer them in different ways. But we always say any other theory that doesn't go with our theory is wrong. That's just not true. As Becky once said in an interview, "We've read a lot of theories online about what it all means and they are all correct.

#dhmis #don't hug me i'm scared #dhmis theory #theory #dhmis spoilers

[ratherembarrassing]

hello! i’m curious about your book thoughts so far for wot, if you wanted to share any of them?

i just finished eotw! just this very minute!

i had a great time! i think i'll need to reread the last few chapters because uh, that was very confusing. but besides that i really enjoyed the world and the eighty seven thousand characters. rand is a baby. there's a whole side story we basically never see between moiraine and nynaeve and egwene. that tiny bit with nynaeve and lan? so small yet !!!!!!. moiraine.

obviously i have the show in my head first, and it was super interesting to see what they had kept the same (very little), what they had taken and used in a different way (a lot), and what they completely dropped (SO MUCH!). there's literally no way you could make a true live action series of material this dense, but i'm not even sure you would want to. collapsing "and then mat, perrin and rand all went on separate adventure and heard the exact same story buried in amongst a bunch of other stuff" into "all five of these kids are ta'veren and moiraine clocks them immediately" really does free up a fuckload of time. that wouldn't make the most exciting tv (that episode is probably the dullest of s1). but those adventures were fun to read! "everyone goes to the eye of the world and then poof, rand goes on a side quest?" no, just send rand because he already knows. and NO ONE else knows? heightened drama! moiraine's a bit tired at the end? NO NO SHE IS FUCKED. these things made sense to me.

but there is something of a shame in those condensed plot points. the books is gorgeously littered with so much world building. the run of chapters at the queen's blessing where everyone reunites and then everything goes sideways only works because so much came before it, but it also works a heck of lot better than in the show. siuan's dreams are a poor substitute for all that work, and poorly executed to boot. sometimes words really do just do a better job.

also, there were exactly two moments that i took a photo of so i wouldn't forget, and they are probably a great encapsulation of what my real interests were here all along:

when old mate in the wagon is explaining the history of caemlyn and the damodred involvement, and rand fucking falls asleep.

when nynaeve asks where rand and mat are and moiraine's like "elsewhere." and nynaeve swears at her but perrin doesn't describe what she said. i fucking lold.

i'm probably going to read new spring next, because reasons. if anyone has any opinions about where in the order of things i should read it, let me know!

#ashleigh reads wot

[silverdune]

..humbug | part two: the christmas of today

"his heart is on the table. and in his phone.."

minors dni. ageless blogs. blank blogs dni. you'll be blocked.

<- previous | ..humbug masterlist | next ->

character(s): yoon jeonghan as the ghost of christmas present (ft. you as scrooge, jeon wonwoo as your ex, choi seungcheol, joshua hong, mentioned kim mingyu)

tags: portals, past relationships/breakups, angst, crying, reader has emotions, wonwoo has regrets, slight claustrophobia, bad puns, banter, explicit language

word count: 2.8k

summary: jeonghan takes you on a journey through the present day: christmas eve, 2023. you witness wonwoo going about his day.. and exactly what has been on his mind all year.

a/n: i know it's after christmas now, but i still want to finish this series, so i endeavour to complete it! thank you for reading, enjoy!

The return to your world is not plain sailing in the least, and a groan punches out of you when you land on your ass in the living room.

Seungcheol manages to remain standing - you surmise it's some supernatural ability - and he immediately walks over to you. “Oh gosh, I am so sorry..”

Jeonghan tuts in the distance, “You couldn't make that any more awkward if you tried, huh?” Joshua shakes his head in disapproval.

Your eyes readjust and you find the other two men still standing in the kitchen. They’ve been here this whole time?

“Um- excuse me-” You clamber to your feet before Seungcheol can offer. “What are you still doing here?”

Joshua and Jeonghan look confused. “Did you expect us to vanish or something?” wonders Joshua.

Well.. yeah. Your expression makes them both chuckle.

Seungcheol steps in, “They were frozen here. Neither of them would have moved a muscle.” It's more a statement of fact than one of just simple reassurance.

Your mind is in a million places at the moment, and your cheeks are still wet from how much you had cried. Other than that, everything remains the exact same.

Seungcheol apologises sincerely for such an abrupt return and for any pain that the landing has caused. You shrug it off, “It's not a problem, really..” You’re not sure you fully believe your words, but they leave you regardless.

“I promise you that my journey will be far less agonising,” assures Jeonghan with a hand on his heart.

Your eyebrow perks up. “..Your journey?” you say, deadpan.

Joshua jabs Jeonghan’s side, “Ah. I don't think we fully explained..”

“Oh! Did we not?” Jeonghan looks to Seungcheol as if to say that he should've slipped that in somewhere, and Seungcheol merely huffs.

You look back and forth between the three men until it dawns on you. “Oh! Because you're the three ghosts, so each of you will be taking me on a different journey.. Got it, got it, sorry.. That was a real trip, my brain is all kinds of fuzzy.”

Jeonghan smiles as he steps into the living room, Joshua following behind. “That's alright, we understand that it must have been a lot.”

As the pair move past the sofas and towards the Christmas tree, you fold your arms across your chest. “So.. Jeonghan.. Are you also taking me through the mirror?”

“Ooh, no.. That is entirely Seungcheol's thing. Me? I like a bit of a pun.” He goes to pick up one of the presents tucked under the tree and your eyes go wide.

“Whoa- whoa-” You rush to stop him as he takes hold of a red box with gold details on the lid. He freezes. “What are you doing?”

He chuckles, “Like I said.. I enjoy a bit of a pun.” Lifting the box, Jeonghan turns on the spot to face you.

You pause. It takes you a few seconds, but then you click your fingers. “Right. Christmas present..” You gesture to the box. “Present..”

“Exactly,” says Jeonghan pointedly.

Joshua pipes up from behind, “He’s very proud of himself for that one.”

“As I should be!” Jeonghan retorts.

“Now, now, you two, don't pick a fight in front of our client,” says Seungcheol.

“Client?” Your stress on the word shows your scepticism of it.

“It's the most fitting term for those we assist,” explains Joshua; the book has reappeared in his arms and he’s absent-mindedly flicking through it.

Jeonghan brings the attention back to him, “Anyways.. This is the present I shall use to guide you to well.. the present.”

“But that means you’ll have to open it and I don't really wanna be spoiled do I? Especially not with the gift from my parents..”

Jeonghan flicks a brow. He glances at the box and sees a tag sticking out the left. A quick check confirms that it is indeed a gift from your parents. “It's a good thing you won't be spoiled then!” More confusion sweeps across your face; it's a running theme when there are too many revelations to count. “Now that I’m holding it, this box has become another portal! Once I open this lid, all you’ll see is darkness.”

“Sounds inviting,” you say, sarcastically.

“I know,” Jeonghan regretfully agrees, “it's quite boring from the get go but I promise it's actually exciting.” Setting the box down on the floor in between you, he lifts the lid to reveal exactly what he described: a swirling darkness, almost like a bottomless pool.

“Whoa..” You step back from it. “And that's the portal, right?”

“Indeed it is, N.” A smile appears on Jeonghan's face. “All you need to do is step into the box and let the magic do the rest!”

Joshua tuts to himself, “..Magic.”

Jeonghan catches it. “What would you call it, eh?”

“I prefer the term, otherworldly capabilities,” he replies, rather cunningly. Seungcheol rolls his eyes.

“Anyways!” Jeonghan exclaims, now frustrated. “Ahem- Step inside, if you wish to visit the present.”

He puts on a voice for dramatic effect and it nearly makes you laugh.. until you remember this is genuinely the next part and you're not sure now if you're ready for it.

Jeonghan senses this hesitation and reassures you. “It's okay, don't worry. We have all the time in the world, so take as long as you need.”

Part of you thinks he's just being polite.

The other half is all too aware he is probably being genuine.

They had frozen in time, after all..

With a deep breath, you put one foot in, expecting to be sucked into the void, but instead it feels a warm bed of water pooling at your ankles. You put your other foot in, nervous for what is about to happen next.

Jeonghan lifts a hand. “After you.”

With a flick of his wrist, you are gone in seconds.

The first thing you do is open your eyes.

To your amazement, there is no darkness, no faded light surrounding you, and the ground is firm beneath your feet. You tap your toes on the concrete a few times just to get your bearings, when Jeonghan appears beside you with a relieved sigh.

“Thank goodness you got here, I was almost worried you wouldn't turn up.” He hides his clear panic behind a nervous laugh before clearing his throat. “With that aside, welcome..”

Jeonghan starts pacing ahead of you, and you can't do much else but follow, despite the worry creeping up your spine as to how this is possible.

“This is so different from Seungcheol's journey..” you comment, keeping your voice to a near-inaudible whisper. Jeonghan hums affirmatively, then casually lets you know you can speak at a regular volume. “How?” you whisper even still, not willing to take that kind of bet.

“Because as much as this is dissimilar from Seungcheol's journey, it is very alike in that you are not here right now.” He stops briefly, and you follow. “You show up as a ghost in each of these trips. You cannot be seen by anyone or heard by anyone. Technically, right now, you are still standing in your living room..” He begins walking again, and you catch up to him. You don't even bother to wrap your head around the irrationality of that statement.

Instead, you take in your surroundings as the two of you stroll through a neighbourhood. Some houses have been decorated, others haven't. It's raining currently, but you can't feel it.

The further you go, the more you start to recognise bits and pieces of this street.

Looking back and forth, you try to rack your brains as to where you’ve seen this road before. This feels so familiar; this is definitely a street you’ve walked before, you're sure of it.

Things are quiet between you and Jeonghan, until he stops you and points to the right, “Recognise that house?”

You pause, and follow his finger to a house just beside you.

As if on cue, someone steps out of it.

That's why this road felt so damn familiar. Nausea builds up in your stomach.

“Wonwoo..”

You gasp at your own self saying his name out loud. You cover your mouth with your hand, and then remember you can't be seen or heard.

God, do you wish you could be.

You see Wonwoo closing his front door then putting on his coat. It's the same one he’s had for years. The one you got him.

“He never got rid of it..” you mutter.

Jeonghan doesn't miss a beat. “He did not. That coat has seen him through..”

You don't know why you're still surprised that Jeonghan is already clued in on this information, but it takes you aback regardless.

The pair of you stand back as Wonwoo walks away from the house to get into his car. It then strikes you that this is the present. This is Christmas 2023. You’re watching Wonwoo go through his life this year.

Your stomach churns. “What.. day is this?”

“Today. Christmas eve. Well, early morning to be specific.”

“He would've just left for work then..” You're reminded of the mornings you would stay with each other, and the times he’d almost give in to five more minutes.. only to actually give in and then rush around trying to get ready before he inevitably had to leave.

There is something so sombre around this image.

Jeonghan senses your mood shift. “Let's move on, shall we?” You look over and see him twirl a finger beside his head. The world changes until you're standing in a different part of town. One quick glance to the left and you nearly collapse.

“Shit.. This is that café-” you blurt, but are caught short but the sound of Wonwoo's voice to your right.

“Excuse me- sorry!” He laughs so coyly, and tears prick at the corner of your eyes. He heads inside the café. You have to lean on Jeonghan for support, your head is incomprehensibly dizzy.

“He took me to this café all the time. This became our favourite go-to spot.. He still comes here..”

You try and piece all of this together, try and find a justifiable explanation beyond Wonwoo clinging to his past with you as a reason for why he still has the coat- it's still intact, it’d make no sense to get rid of it- why he still goes to the same café- it's close to his place of work, it sells good food, why would he go anywhere else?

You’re stuck on these explanations, even as you watch Wonwoo leave the café with the same brown paper bag he always left with, and it probably has the same sandwich order he always picks up, and-

“It is no coincidence,” comes Jeonghan's voice, pulling you from every thought imaginable. “Despite the year that has passed since you broke it off, he is still here, in all of these places.” You stare into the distance as Wonwoo fades into the crowd that engulfs him. “Make no mistake.. he regrets his actions since the discussion.”

The words chill right to the bone. You’re unsure if it's the words themselves, the way Jeonghan says them, or a mix of both, but the effect is palpable.

That's when you argue back. “How do I know these aren't just coincidences, though? There are many reasons as to why he's still got the coat, why he still gets food here..”

Jeonghan sighs. “Would there be many reasons for this?”

The world shifts again, and you find yourself.. in Wonwoo's home.

You almost feel scared to be here, like you shouldn't be. You shouldn't be seeing this, or getting a glimpse into Wonwoo's day like this.

You find that it's late at night. The blizzard has begun exactly how it did when you were at home. The blizzard that led to you finding the three ghosts in your kitchen.

Wonwoo is gazing out of his kitchen window.

He moves and sits down at the dining table. His hands glide across the surface as though searching for something to hold onto.

Some.. one.

His phone appears. He unlocks it, taps some buttons, scrolls a few times, lifts his phone up and stares.

Jeonghan stands back once. It takes a few seconds, but then it clicks.

“No.. No, I..”

“His heart is on the table. And in his phone.”

It's the only statement he needs. You swallow the lump in your throat and move to stand behind Wonwoo.

His gallery is open. There he is, flicking through every image of past Christmases that he lovingly separated into folders by year because that is exactly what he's like. It makes you giggle on the spot just thinking about it, and then you burst into tears.

Before long, you realise that Wonwoo has choked out a sob or two, before putting the phone face down on the table.

You don't know why, but a sudden urge to sit before him overcomes you.

So, that's exactly what you do.

Sitting toe to toe, with just centimetres of space between you is enough to make you break out in hives. Watching as Wonwoo falls apart over a few images.. while you had these thoughts, feelings and emotions tucked away as you hurt to confront them again.

“Why didn't we talk more?” he openly laments to himself.

Your heart constricts. "Why didn't we.." you solemnly agree.

His phone buzzes on the table. Wonwoo goes still. He stares at the phone as it rumbles along the surface. He’s itching to pick it up, but his hand hovers above the phone. You can practically feel his heart beating through his chest.

Your eyes find Jeonghan. He lifts a brow expectantly.

You sigh and glance at the floor.

Wonwoo had been hoping it was you.

When he finally lifts the phone and looks at the caller ID, your eyes flicker up to see an unmistakable expression of disappointment. He accepts the call and presses it to his ear. “Mingyu, hi..”

Mingyu. Wonwoo’s closest friend. You remember meeting him for the first time. Taller than Wonwoo, very sociable and extroverted. The polar opposite of your ex.

“Yeah, I got back from work not long ago. Eh? Oh.. sorry, do I sound upset?” He chuckles while wiping tears from his eyes. “Sorry, I just got to thinking about N again..”

Again?

“I know.. I seriously fucked up, it's been eating away at me all year.. I don't know, I just.. Every time I went to do it, I got cold feet, it all felt wrong, you know I told you about that. As each day went on, it felt like the chances of them wanting me back were dwindling and I would be wasting my time.. So I just.. wasted more time and before we know it, it's the end of another year.”

“Wonwoo!” you call out, knowing full well he can't hear you. “For God's sake, Wonwoo..” You could scream right now. Did he really think all that? Is that why he grew so distant to the point of treating you like a stranger? Did he believe that the one discussion you had had undone everything between you?

“They were so understanding, Mingyu.. Fuck, is it crazy to say I love them still after all this time? I miss them so much.. I’ve been looking back through all our pictures, it hurts to remember how it ended..”

“We could've talked! I was here all this time, I was waiting for you!” You cry it all out to him, but really, it's to a void that can't reply.

“Maybe I was upset inside that they didn't say much to me afterwards but.. how did I expect them to? After over three years, I dropped that on them, of course they were going to want their distance too..”

You sit back in the chair, breathing heavily as the words sink in. “I’m sorry.. I’m so.. so sorry.. We should’ve said more. I should’ve said more. You could have come to me, fuck!” You put your head in your hands and sob into them.

“I want to say sorry to them but I don't know how.. It all feels so, so late.. I feel like I’ve done too much damage.”

You lift your head, wishing you could take his hand in yours. “Wonwoo, I..”

“But I still want them back.. I still love them..”

You feel a weight being taken off your shoulders and a new one being placed down.

“I.. want you back.. I still love you..”

It feels like such a hard thing to admit, and yet it comes out so easily.

You don't even notice Jeonghan smile, lift his hand, and swirl a finger beside his head.

Not a second later, you are in your living room once again.

taglist: @minhui896

× tristeetconfus (ave). do not repost. ×

#seventeen scenarios #seventeen imagines #jeonghan scenarios #jeonghan imagines #wonwoo scenarios #wonwoo imagines #words.(ave) #fic: humbug

[otakween]

8-Man vs. Cyborg 009 - Volume 2

Love a good 2 volume, short read every now and then. Unlike BGOO Parts, this one didn't outstay its welcome. Nothing ground breaking here, just some crossover fanservice like in the Devilman crossover. Fun times. Interested to see what's next for these franchises.

Ch. 7

8-Man tells Joe and Francoise about his past romantic drama with his secretary Sachiko. Francoise apparently "saw" Sachiko's presence when they were in 8-Man's office and wanted the tea lol.

If they're not gonna let Francoise fight, like ever, can they please introduce another female fighter or something? I'm getting really fed up watching her smile blandly on the sidelines or be a damsel in distress. Like if she's a pacifist, fine! But she's also the only girl cyborg so it feels insulting.

The two page spread of the demon God statue was a good jump scare. Let the final showdown, begin!

Ch. 8

Lol I guess the manga heard my complaints because they finally let Francoise shoot a gun at least. Also, her heightened senses finally did something useful. Alright, fine. You win this time mangaka...

Wait, what the hell!? Pyunma's back to his old racist design! THIS MANGA CAME OUT IN 2020 WTF??? (Good thing I didn't pay for this one lol).

Honestly, it seems ridiculous that Skull would just ignore the other numbers cyborgs. There's no way they wouldn't come after their kidnapped friends...just makes him look really stupid.

The Black Ghost minions were drawn all cutesy in like a chibi form. They look like they could be villains from a Mario game or something lol. Not very intimidating.

Ch. 9

Yaaay 008 pointed out the 8 thing =D lol. Glad he gets to contribute to the battle even though there's no water around lol.

Francoise has a weird bonding moment with Dr. Daemon because he saw her in a ballet once. He's definitely the chiller of the two evils but he's still actively working towards world domination and perpetual wars? I don't think this is really a "there's good in him" moment...

8-man sure loses his arms a lot. Guess they're just trying to emphasize his mechanical body.

I swear they used the EXACT same tactic to topple the demon God statue that they used to topple the Atlas-type robots in BGOO Parts! (006 digs a hole and then 005 pushes the big enemy over). Felt weird to see that used back-to-back in manga published so close to one another. Both times they emphasized it as some kinda ingenious strategy.

Ch. 10

Awe, I really liked this finale. They wrapped everything up in a nice, neat bow and sometimes that's all you want.

So Dr. Daemon was actually playing the long game and never allied with Black Ghost at all! Rather convenient lol. Does they mean the gang wouldn't have been able to defeat both enemies at once?

I completely forgot about Joe's juvenile delinquent backstory. Why do I feel like that doesn't fit his character at all? He's such a bland do-gooder now...Anyway, having 8-Man explain that he was a cop on the scene at the time of Joe's escape attempt was a clever way to tie the two series worlds together in a believable way.

So I guess Dr. Daemon is still not a great guy but not that evil either? I don't know enough 8-Man lore to make a conclusion lol. He seemed pretty okay with the heroes dying earlier, so I guess he's just all for himself.

This chapter got all Ghost in the Shell-y with the reveal that Skull isn't a real person, just a robot with implanted memories. Pretty brutal that he decapitated his own lackeys to prove a point what the heck...what if they weren't robots!?

So Black Ghost is dead "for real" now...riiiight. Until they inevitably get resurrected again for some future manga.

I was kinda shook to find out that Joe's hair is a wig (or maybe it's actually implanted into his scalp? IDK). It doesn't actually make any difference, I just never realized that was the case.

Dr. Gilmore and Dr. Tani being science bros was cute. Also enjoyed seeing Ivan (and his one eye) very briefly.

Nice picturesque ending with Joe and Francoise dropping 8-Man off at Sachiko's house and validating his humanity. Wholesome cyborgs supporting cyborgs.

Omake - Duel

A closer look at some 8-Man/Dr. Tani lore. I kinda wish they didn't include this tbh because it ended this volume on a depressing note.

Damn, if I was Ken I'd probably resent my dad too! Ken was like "you only love 8-Man!" and Dr. Tani was like "that's not true!" but then the second Ken dies Dr. Tani's just like "meh, at least I have 8-Man" lol. Poor Ken!

Speaking of poor Ken...that's one severe widow's peak. On top of having a craptastic life, he's also balding? Oh the humanity!

Dr. Tani acted like Ken being a cyborg with a human brain was a revelation of some sort? Sooo...if Dr. Tani wasn't the one to turn Ken into a cyborg, who did?

Ken's hero suit (or villain suit, I guess) literally just looks like he sharpied some fake pecs on lol. What a weird design choice.

As far as 1960s manga go, I think I prefer Cyborg 009's art style because it's more over-exaggerated and stylized. I think this allows it to hold up more. 8-Man feels more traditionally drawn (more proportional characters).

I'm kinda glad I got a glimpse into the authentic, OG 8-Man for greater context, but I'll also probably just read this again someday if I ever get to that part of MAL haha.

#8-man #manga #cyborg 009 #cyborg 009 vs. 8-man

[pascalsbby]

Oh Kat, let me start with I love you. I love you deeply and desperately for giving us Carnal.. the same goes for TDAHB. There appears to be no end in sight for how much this grows with each lyrical masterpiece I read and reread. How do I even start to compliment my favorite series and such a ethereal writer. Nothing I say can do either justice. But I am going to try.

The thing about it is that I not only relate to Birdie but you write in such a way that I also relate to this completely feral Joel.. the mental torment and torture they both go through is so palpable. You do such a beautiful job of bringing dark desires to life. It all feels so real. Something (everything) about Birdie is so deeply personal to me somehow. Like sure some of the details are not my exact lived experience (hitting close tho) but who she is at her core speaks to my entire being. I love her and want to hold her and never leave.

The dialogue, the set up, the internal monologue, real, real, real. Your style of writing gives some of the most visceral imageries I have ever experienced while reading.

I repeat almost every single line, paragraph over and over while reading. Letting the words roll around in my mouth and mind. I love the way they sound, feel and taste on my tongue. It is so poetic and deeply moving. My brain and body respond to your art in a way that has me on my knees for you, truly. It is such a hauntingly beautiful experience to read you work.

Thank you 💓

a gift for you "the warm, guts and roaring blood of me"

Sincerely, Carnal Mary 🫠

Mary, I love you back. Deeply. Here is my attempt at expressing what all of your love has given me.

I always sit and think about what I want to say, for far too long. Not because of any other reason besides the one where I want you/every who has commented and shown love, to feel how grateful I am for your feelings and thoughts. “I hope that they know when I say thank you I really mean: YOU’RE PROUD OF ME? YOU LISTENED AND LIKE WHAT YOU HEARD? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO ME?” Being seen and feeling heard feels good. It’s an understanding that I haven’t encountered too often. You make me feel seen, heard, understood, listened to. 

I haven’t written before this, in a really long time. I haven’t painted in a long time, either. Sometimes I think of high school me– she was familiar with far too much, far too soon, yet still believed in some sort of magic that is hard to pull from now. I’m terrified at the pace it's retreating, but it resurfaces every once in a while. It feels like an innate overflowing. The kind of warmth you can only get from sitting directly underneath the sun’s eyeline. I feel like that whenever I'm thinking/writing Birdie. She is a thousand different versions of me and you, of them, of him, whoever. But in this story, she is paid attention to… hated, discarded, loved; even in the name of love/lust/want/yearning. Yet she isn't shamed for any of it here. I’ve felt the overflowing the most when writing this, and even more so when reading what people (you) think about it, how it makes you feel, what you think about when reading it, too. 

Whenever I sit down and write, sometimes it hurts and I can’t get it out. Other times it feels like a warm hug. Regardless, I feel like I dug the heaviness out of my chest and sat it beside me for a while. This is the calm that I would sit on my bedroom floor and cry for at 14. This silence can’t be as loud as the deafening pull of someone else's forced anger/sadness/despair. This is mine, and yours, and whoever reads it and feels it in their chest, too. To hold the warmth, guts, and roaring blood of you is a privilege. Thank you for sharing your poetry with me.

Love forever n' ever,

Kat

#i am actually crying #sweetness #carnal #joel miller #tlou #the last of us #pedro pascal

[meta-squash]

Okay, second In The Flesh Meta of the day.

I just keep thinking about the way that time is utilized in this show. I’m thinking mostly about series 1 here, because the timeline for series 2 is slightly fuzzier.

The five year gap between the Rising and Kieren coming back is, I think, one of the most important uses of time in series one.

It’s not a short enough time that Kieren’s family are still in the throes of fresh grief over his death or fresh trauma over the existence of the undead, but it’s also not so long that they ever became comfortable with his absence. They still kept his room, they don’t seem to have established any major routines that pass through the gaps that he left when he died. And the whole rehabilitation thing has been in existence for like a year, long enough that it’s still new but it’s not new-new and they understand the basics of it. They obviously have knowledge from the news or whatever about treated PDS, so they’re not quite so uncertain about Kieren.

At the start of the series, the Walker family all have had enough time to be at least somewhat familiar with each of these uncomfortable concepts.

Which is not so with Kieren. While he’s had his time at the treatment centre to reacclimate and get used to his new physical state, emotionally he’s still where he was when he died, plus this other new stuff on top. So the family’s uncertainty and wobbliness comes from the disruption of becoming familiar with certain states of existence, whereas Kieren’s problems come from being unable to even be familiar with anything in the first place.

Kieren and his family are on different timelines in series 1. They’re thinking of moving at the beginning so Kieren doesn’t have to return to Roarton, so they’re somewhat aware of how it’s going to be for him in terms of the past. But they kind of expect him to be where they are to some extent (in that strange but less volatile middle area between fresh pain and tolerable acceptance); instead he’s still mostly where he was when he died (still mostly fresh grief, confusion, loneliness and feeling lost). The problem is they see the past as the past while to Kieren it’s still practically the present. Half the reason he’s trapped in the cycle of “it’s becoming just like it was before and I don’t know how to change it” is because he never really left that trajectory in the first place. He killed himself feeling grief and anger and alienation and loneliness and when he comes to five years have passed but he doesn’t really remember them so it’s like they didn’t happen. And when he returns to Roarton he only gets like...barely two days before everything goes through the same exact cycle again and he’s confronted with the trauma of losing Rick a second time and Amy the first time and he’s back to being lonely and outcast and in pain. The however many months at the treatment centre don’t count because half of that is acclimating to his own physical state and jumping through rehab hurdles etc, completely separate from the circumstances of his hometown and the emotional triggers it holds.

So while Kieren’s family has had those five years to ruminate over all the why’s and how’s and various ‘if only we’d done x’ things regarding Kieren’s suicide, Kieren hasn’t had that sort of time. To him, it’s as though he killed himself, was awakened the next day, spent some months in hospital not really addressing his act of suicide, and then he’s back to exactly the same circumstances as before without the benefit of time to dull his emotional or mental state.

So Kieren and his family are to some extent on different timelines of trauma, although Kieren’s flashbacks mean that he’s technically dealing with two different timelines of trauma, in that emotionally it is as though Ricks death and therefore his own only occurred some months ago, but he also now has to contend with the knowledge of his actions in his untreated state and the guilt of that.

But Rick’s return and his second death merge the two, because suddenly the timeline becomes a mirror of itself, even to the point of Kieren dying a second time, not literally but metaphorically as he goes to the cave after Rick’s murder, and then his own death in the cave is re-enacted by his father at the end. But Kieren’s metaphorical death through his retreat to the cave and his father’s memory means that this time he doesn’t have to die in actuality, and he’s able to process his grief in a better way.

That means that by the time Amy returns with Simon a little under a year later, he has much more stable footing. Which is important because it means in series 2, his mental and emotional timeline is pretty much linear, and Simon is the one slipping all over the place.

#in the flesh #in the flesh meta #bbc in the flesh #itf

[skelekin]

Sonic Prime Season 2/Season 1 part 2 thoughts and critiques

Nobody asked but I'm gonna share em anyway, minor spoilers ahead

Stuff I liked:

Shadow. Good god how refreshing it is to see a portrayal of Shadow that isn't one-note and sucks ass. his voice is closer to his original SA2 depiction, him beating the snot out of Sonic isn't entirely unprompted and random, and honestly his scenes may have carried this entire season. The interactions he has with Sonic are also fantastic and oooogghh gay

Sonic!! I'll be honest I really have a hard time understanding ppl's issues with his characterization here; he's a naive, impulsive, rebellious teenager that wants to see the good in the world. I like that I actually get to see him make mistakes, jump to conclusions, and be scared or sad. This is the kind of thing I feel like ppl have been ASKING for from him so I don't quite get the pushback

Nine is great as ever, definitely a highlight of this entire series and he could possibly end up having one of the best character arcs in the franchise

Chaos Sonic!!!!! Wowie what a fun dude, his segments made me smile the most

Animation is once again super bouncy and fluid with dynamic shots, you can tell action is this team's bread and butter (to a fault at times, but I'll get to that later)

Stuff I didn't like:

Good GOD is the pacing bad. Honestly I think it might be worse than season 1, there were so many times where I thought to myself "nothing is happening", and desperately wished they used the little time they had per episode to flesh characters out or have some more world building.

On that, as great as the action animation is, these scenes easily take up two thirds of each episode and it gets very, very boring after a while. It becomes difficult to appreciate them when they seem to just never end. There were so many times when I would become relieved when they finally took a pause, only for that relief to vanish a minute later when the egg council throws out more of the same exact cannon fodder for yet another battle scene

And speaking of the egg council, oooh boy did they get grating. I get this is a kids show, I'm not even expecting like ATLA levels of villains here, but they feel straight from Disney Junior. The concept of eggman cloning himself and having each one represent a different aspect of his psyche is fantastic, but it's completely squandered on one-dimensional tropes that tell literally the same exact jokes word for word, there is nothing intimidating about them

Like I said I desperately kept begging for SOME level of adequate screentime to flesh out the characters and other worlds, but as is, aside from Nine, the other versions of these guys just have One Bit and their worlds again feel ripped from Disney Junior. I was holding out hope that since season 1 had to introduce all of them that season 2 would get to show more, but no. Pirate world where they all go yar har and that's it. Jungle world where they do battle cries and that's it. Despite being the crux of the entire premise of this show they're painfully uninteresting

Where is Shadow!!!!!! What little we see of him is fantastic, too bad he's barely present! They hyped up his elevated appearance so much and seeing him hardly get to do anything was such a let down.

Chaos Sonic, as fun as he was, was only present for one episode. Why

It's very saddening to see this show fall into the recent trap plaguing media aimed at younger audiences where everything is dialed up to 11 nearly All the Time. The samey stock background action music hardly ever stops, once again these guys can't seem to go one minute without punching swarms of copy paste goons, we must keep jingling the keys because how else will we keep kids' attention. I think back to how 4Kids added unecessary music queues to every single action when adapting Sonic X and how much worse it was for it

Overall Prime has been really frustrating because there's so many glimmers of potential on display that get bogged down by the fact that they're just not willing to fully commit to and take any risk on. Idk how much of that is the team's fault, I don't doubt the possibility that higher up the chain some suits are holding their vision back. It just sucks bc I really, REALLY want to like this show more, but I can't really say it's more than just. Okay

I hope season 3 is able to reel it back in

#sonic prime #sonic the hedgehog #sonic

[probthomahusband]

Spy x family AU

Pairing: Spy! Steve Rogers x Assassin! Y/n

Summary: the story follows a spy and an assassin who have to build a "family" to execute a mission. Eventually, both of them started to have feelings for each other.

* These are just some ideas i got in my mind, there will be some changes so the story won't be the exact same as the OG spy x family manga :P

𝘈/𝘯: 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦, 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘦 𝘫𝘶𝘮𝘱 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘈𝘜 𝘪 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘢𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴, 𝘌𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘣𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘮𝘦 (𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘧 𝘪 𝘮��𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶). 𝘔𝘺 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪'𝘮 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘪 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘳 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦'𝘳𝘦 𝘈 𝘓𝘖𝘛 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯. 𝘈𝘯𝘺𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴, 𝘪'𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘳𝘢𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘸, 𝘭𝘦𝘵'𝘴 𝘨𝘰 :D

Steve Grant Rogers (32)

𝐂𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞: 𝐃𝐚𝐰𝐧

𝐀𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: 𝐍𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐒𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐫𝐞

- A skilled spy, has worked as a spy for 10 years

- Very intelligent and straight forward

- As a spy, his personality is cold and efficient for his job, doing whatever it takes to complete the mission

- Has a good degree of strength (as expected)

- He has also learned various other skills required by his job, including lockpicking, basic forgery, bomb defusing and military dog training

- Mastered the art of household chores, can do literally everything

- He works as a psychiatrist (to cover up his real one 👌)

- Has zero relationship experience

- He likes to discuss his plans with the family dog - Toby Rogers

- He's a malewife family man i don't make the rules

Y/n L/n / Rogers (26)

Yes i put the self insert thinggy here 🌚

𝐂𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞: 𝐁𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐫 𝐑𝐨𝐬𝐞

𝐀𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: 𝐁𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧

- A professional assassin

- She's calm, collected and kinda timid

- She can be a serious or even intimidating person when it comes to bussiness but in daily life she's the sweetest one

- Probably has a thing for torture methods and really wants to test out on her victims (she's a menace)

- She's very agile, though not as smart as Steve, she has some knowledge about human body and a sharp intutition

- Can use all kinds of weapons but she adores her golden stiletto like weapons the most

- Can't cook for shit, might as well burn the house down

- Good at cleaning, can easily clean up all the bloodstains mess

- Work as a city hall clerk

- Also has no experience in realtionship (makes the two of them)

- She has a soft spot for Natalie and WILL throw hands if someone makes her daughter cry

Natalie Rogers (6)

I couldn't find anything to visualize the kid so you just gotta come up with one 🥴

- A 6 years old with telepathy ability (no one knows about this)

- She's the adopted daughter of Steve

- A cheerful, energetic kid

- Despite being a kid, Natalie is quiet clever, she can learn things very quick

- Accidentally discovered her parents true identity by reading their thoughts

- Natalie has abandonment issues since her previous families always ended up abandoned her, this child just want a loving family

- Loves her family and also her stuffed animals

- She likes the series "Totally spies" and often seen watching it whenever she can

- Enjoy seeing her parents bonding and sometimes she makes plans for them to spend time together :)

- Calls Steve "papa" and Y/n "mama"

- She rated her parents a 100/10 :Đ

Alright, that's it everyone, i hope y'all enjoy this brief idea of mine 😋

_

Edit: unfortunately, i won't be continue writing this AU because of many different reasons

#steve rogers au #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers fanfiction #steve x reader #steve rogers x female!reader #steve rogers #steve rogers x y/n #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x female reader #chris evans x y/n #spy x family au #steve rogers fic

[aquaticsoul]

Misterican Twins: Forming Outside Connections

As you are all probably aware by now, Sielu is one of a pair of twins. The more I write him, the more I realize just how integral this is to... pretty much everything about how he perceives the world and himself, so I decided to type up a meta about it. And then I realized the meta would be really long, so I'm breaking it up into a series of them. This one explores how Sielu forms connections with other people.

First, I should go over Misterican twins in general. It's important to remind you here (like my friend Kira says quite often) that Mistericans are not human. They are humanoid and around human-sized, but that's about where the resemblance ends. Mistericans are born and made of a magical substance known as Mist, which they refer to as their "soul's breath". Mist is indeed what makes up their souls. Since they produce it in their bodies and breathe it out at all times, this is a pretty accurate term.

Misterican twins occur when the same Mist ends up separating - the same soul's breath given two forms and therefore two names.

Due to Misterican genetics being different than ours, their twins can't be categorized the same way. Fraternal, identical, etc. are words that don't quite fit right. Those are words used to describe the way human twins form and Sielu would likely be quite confused at the idea of needing those different categories.

Misterican twins are exceptionally in tune with each other even well beyond what has been observed in human twins. Misterican twins tend to treat their twin as their literal "other half", because to a great extent, this is true.

Sielu most certainly is no exception to this. Sydän is separate from him only in hue and gender - every other feature is the same or mirrored right down to their eye shape and the way their hair parts. Of course, aspects of their personalities ended up being different as well. They aren't the same exact person, merely just born of the same exact Mist.

Still, from birth until around age six or seven, he suffered extreme and inconsolable separation anxiety whenever they were too far apart. She typically understood what he was feeling, even sometimes down to what he was thinking - they were in tune to a point just shy of complete telepathy so he always wanted to be in her company. Even as an adult, being away from her for too long tended to make him nervous and upset. After her death, a void is left in him, his soul seeking but not finding its other half.

Having this level of connection to another person from birth made Sielu's relationships (and sense of self) develop a bit differently than most other Mistericans. He typically approaches people as if they'll understand him without him having to explain himself, and he also takes misunderstandings extremely hard. His mind will jump instantly to the worst-case scenario or feelings of deep rejection should something he says be taken the wrong way.

The most extreme example of this is after his escape from Herba, when Valo and Revon pointed out a piece of information Sielu didn't have nor did he factor in. He assumed that they would understand he wasn't attempting to do anything except inform them of what had happened to him, but when they did not, he shut down for weeks on end. He scolded himself relentlessly, assumed that they hated him, refused to engage in conversation, and thought numerous times about simply running away. In his mind, the misunderstanding was not that at all, but rather a deliberate action intended to cause him pain and "put him in his place" because he is so used to not having to explain what he wants or needs.

Of course, explaining himself later did end up helping this issue a bit, but this is an example more than it's a story.

You may be wondering how this factors into friendships and romance, and I'll get into that now so that you don't have time to make fun of my poor attempt at a segue.

Friendships, to Sielu, aren't something he often takes too seriously. Everyone is his friend unless they give him reason to decide otherwise (or unless Sydän does not like them, because if she's uncomfortable, so is he). Where most people think of their friends as close and extremely important, Sielu just... doesn't.

Even if he calls you a friend and even if he's kind to you, it doesn't necessarily mean he cares all that much what opinion you have of him. If you're nice to him and nice to his family, that's usually all he cares about and enough for him to be friendly back to you.

If you are one of the rare few who get from "friend" to "close friend", then he starts to care about what you think of him. His doubts and insecurities really lie in what his close friends'/family members' opinions are. You'll know you're here if he ever comes to you for advice, calls you his family (because close friend = family in his mind), or goes out of his way to make sure you aren't upset with him.

As for romance, he's tried going on dates. None of them went well whatsoever due in part to his own disinterest and in part to potential partners' frustrations with him. After a few disaster attempts and making a Royal-Teacher Life Oath to Pilvi, he didn't really try again. Romance isn't important to him, because he disagrees that romantic relationships are the "end goal". He truly believes that there's no hierarchy when it comes to types of love and despises the idea that one cannot be happy without romance.

Familial relationships/close friendships will always be his favored ones due to the comfort and familiarity they provide him, and this applies even more so to the two people he quite literally shares his soul with. Forming a genuine connection with Sielu is not easy, but it is certainly worth it given his fierce loyalty to his loved ones and heart practically made out of gold.

#hey ho nobody home ; queue. #death tw #topic ; mist #topic ; pilvi #topic ; sydän #topic ; family #topic ; background #topic ; personality #music alone shall live ; headcanon.

[airlock]

okay, so, I was going to save this rant for the middle of my full Scarlet Blaze opinions post (... as one does, I guess), but I’m starting to worry that it’ll either get so long-winded it’ll take up more than its due real estate there, or that I’ll have lost too much of the immediate fervor by the time I finish the entire route. so here’s a quick rant concerning Monica and Fire Emblem fan reactions

not to bury the lede though. some people find Monica pretty annoying -- I don’t agree, but that much is perfectly fine. lately though I have been seeing a lot of comparisons to fucking Tharja and Faye, and that’s starting to make me frustratred possibly beyond the point of rationality. more under the cut!

so I haven’t seen everything that Scarlet Blaze has to offer, and for all I know something nasty is going to crop up ahead of the line and I’ll eat crow. crossing that bridge when I get to it. where I’m at right now, though, how shall I describe Monica? she has it bad for Edelgard, of course. it’s her Repetitive Character Thing, so it’ll always come up in those scenes where Linhardt is being lazy and Bernadetta is panicking and Petra is misuderstanding an idiom and Caspar is screaming -- or, as it were, ehum, revealing that he doesn’t know what sex is. it grates just as much as the other ones typically do, naturally. she’s also not a character with a wealth of dimensions or screentime outside of this, though, so there’s not terribly much else to anchor the screentime she does get. I can very, very easily see how not everyone would have the stamina for it.

Monica is not a fucking stalker, though.

is she obssessed with Edelgard? yes, for sure. but I’ve also yet to see a single scene where Monica actually violates Edelgard’s boundaries. she’s often a little much and kind of embarassing, but on occasions when she’s affirmatively told to reel it in, she does it without a complaint. and it almost never actually comes to that, anyway; she’s perfectly respectful most of the time without anyone telling her how to do it. conversely, I don’t think I’ve seen a single scene where Edelgard actually sounds at all uncomfortable with Monica’s attentions; at most, their B support almost goes there, but Edelgard is only really upset because she doesn’t want Monica unwittingly projecting affection into a decision that she made perfectly callously.

none of the above is stalking, by half. most everything Monica does in this game is just a kind of a comically exaggerated version of having a completely regular crush.

and naturally, that’s where her and Tharja differ dramatically. like, I am going to abstain from making too many definitive statments about what Tharja did or didn’t do -- it’s, thank god, been ages since last I touched Awakening -- but if nothing else, the known and obvious writer intent doesn’t lie. Tharja was conceived as a sympathetic stalker, whose repugnant behavior we’re expected to find sexually appealling. (and if her perennially solid CYL results are any indication, yeah, a bunch of us do find it sexually appealling, some freaking how).

I speak at least for me when I say that is the reason why Tharja is a garbage character -- and if she’s also one-note annoying and has one of the dumbest character designs this series has seen prior to Fates, those are secondary annoyances strictly, which would have easily blended into the sea of other Awakening characters with these exact same flaws if not for how #1 stands out as the real problem.

so like, if I’m willing to take things in good faith, I can at least sometimes let folks slide if they’re making that comparison, if I just assume that what they’re saying is “those are two characters that annoy me because they’re intensely obssessed with one other character; no statement on whether their similarities run any deeper than that”. even in that regard though, I can’t help noting that characters who are kind of obssessed with specific other characters have been a thing in this franchise since the freaking Akaneia Saga, so I can’t be too charitable to the thought that such a misleading comparison was the best one they could come up with.

(and in any case, for that matter, noting as much is a balm against the ones who are catastrophizing about how every Fire Emblem is going to be “like this” or something. like, I get, it’s hard to get over how dizzyingly stupid the whole thing was with adding a stalker to a remake -- but if this really is just about being annoyed by obssessive characters, then I regret to inform you, that’s just where we’ve been this entire goddamn time. you don’t have to like it regardless, but don’t treat it like a novel trope when it isn’t.)

now, those of you who know me well enough know that I really do not like making this kind of accusation just to win at fandom discourse (possible to achieve, normal to want, etc), but every now and then there are situations that actually call for it, so I'm just gonna let it out here in the heat of the moment and hope I won’t be embarassed whenever I’ve fully well calmed down about this. here goes -- if you can’t spot the line in the sand between an annoying lesbian and a goddamn stalker... you might need to work on your general opinion of lesbians, dontcha think?

#my stupid text posts #Fire Emblem is tagged in this post #Fódlan FE is tagged in this post #and there we go. discourse out