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#this one is just a controlled environment
conflictofthemind · 2 days
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Thoughts on "Escape from Camazotz"
Oppressive Suburbia, Conformity, and Season 5 Themes
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I've long thought that a major focus of Season 5 will be the contrast between the families of The Wheelers and The Byers, and exploring how non-traditional family environments can be freeing vs the oppressive structure of the nuclear family.
In a Wrinkle In Time, Camazotz is a planet controlled by the big bad of the book, the "IT", who forces the citizens into a conformity that resembles American suburbia. All of the houses the same, the citizens the same, doing the same things at the same time without individual identity. Without anything different. Different means a lot of things, but with Stranger Things dropping different in reference to Will's identity and the presumable themes of this season, it will heavily codify as queerness and how it threatens the cisheterosexual family model.
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Henry was raised in the 1950s, a decade still revered by conservatives for it's traditional family dynamics that supposedly were the peak of culture and happiness for all. That was all a lie, of course, and Henry knew so as he shows to Nancy and Eleven during his monologue. The second most conservative decade aside from the 1950s in American society is widely considered to be the 1980s.
The Creels will serve in parallel to The Wheelers; the worst example of what they could become and the damage that this type of family could do to a child that is different in any way. Notice how Vecna selectively shows Nancy visions of The Wheelers dying, but not anyone else she may consider family or friends (like Jonathan).
That is; unless they change their ways and come together as a healthy functioning family facing their traumas, The Wheelers will be toast.
Karen has been moved up to a main character role this season. Ted's actor says the father starts to show up more for Holly (hold that) and realizes he wants to act differently. Holly has been recast. Finn has said Mike goes on a much more personal journey this season, and steps up as a leader.
Oh, also: the catalyst for all of this is that Holly goes missing. The contrast will help show how the Byers (including El and Hopper here) were able to pull together and help solve Will's disappearance, versus how the Wheelers as a closed off nuclear family grapple with Holly's vanishing.
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Each of the Byers is in some kind of a non-1950s conformist relationship, but particularly Will (not in one now but we all know he will be). I think El might represent, after she breaks up with Mike, the fear of the unmarried woman being satisfied without a husband. The above shot really emphasizes my point.
I predict that Will will end up coming out to his family rather early on, and we will see all of them immediately accept him with little surprise or push-back. Will is a visible gay man who comes from an open minded non traditional family (divorced, non-married, adoptive) that is willing to have honest conversations.
But this theme will place the most focus on the Wheelers. Mike is the main character of said family and this will particularly focus on his arc, and his acceptance of his queerness in the midst of suburban conformity.
He is not visible, he comes from a Reagan-supporting family who don't communicate with each other. He is not particularly close with his family like Will is. He pushes his feelings down and tries his damn hardest to be normal despite it all. His trauma hasn't really been addressed at all. He is falling back into his usual habits - the one thing he dared to do different (grow his hair long) has gone back to how it was.
It's not all doom and gloom though. This season above all will be a redemption arc of the American nuclear family, how they choose to escape their conformity and learn to be there for each other, thus overpowering Vecna. Not that the Wheelers are going to end this personally.
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"Great, more hysteria. Just what we need". "It's the news, now indistinguishable from the tabloids".
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toxictranny · 2 days
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​ok i hav a confession. nobody make fun of me pls .. , i hate guns. they’re scary and costly and bad for the planet and loud. also because like if u wanna kill me don’t be a pussy about it just use your fucking hands.??
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greghatecrimes · 2 days
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Okay. Buckle up babes, it's finally Foreteen time and I wrote an essay.
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Foreman and Thirteen are so interesting to me in so many ways. You have Foreman, who thrives off of control, and Thirteen, who refuses to be controlled in almost every aspect of her life. In the sense of them as individual people, they both have a lot of their own issues going on. Hot messes, the two of them. But in the sense of them as a couple, I think Foreman specifically is the only one who has issues with the relationship. (Or rather, Thirteen's issues aren't being projected onto the relationship and causing difficulties at the end of s5/beginning of s6, while Foreman's are.)
Foreman's biggest thing, at least in the latter part of their relationship, is control in regards to emotions. After they found Kutner, he coped with everything by isolating himself. A huge part of me thinks that's because this terrible thing just happened, the floor just fell out from both of them in so many ways, and Foreman feels like he doesn't have a grip on anything anymore. The only thing he can control is himself, and how he reacts. So Thirteen? Even though she's his girlfriend and he's worked with her for two years, her emotions and reactions are fundamentally beyond the scope of his control; she's still a wild card. She's not safe. So instead of letting himself lean on Thirteen, letting them grieve together, letting them comfort each other, for his own stability, Foreman chooses to cope (and thus reject Thirteen when she reaches out for support) by retreating into an environment that he's intimately familiar with. He surrounds himself with only variables that he can confidently predict. It's his gut instinct. It's always worked before, so why wouldn't it work this time? Why would it have any reason to cause problems?
In season four and the first half of season five, Thirteen was very much the same way. When things became too overwhelming for her, she repeatedly dealt with them by running, by hiding; by trying to isolate herself from the people who care about her and want to help her. The same base principle drives them both at this point: "what's out of my control is dangerous in some way or another. The only one who's safe to be around is myself, because I am the only person that I can control." But by mid season five, Thirteen has come a long way from that. Slowly she's becoming much more of a "recovering control freak". She's starting to be okay with the fact that she's not always going to have the amount of control that she has right now. She knows that all of it is something she has to come to terms with, and slowly she's getting to a point where she's accepting her diagnosis and working on all the baggage that comes with it.
Thinking about that– the fact that, by mid season five, Thirteen is approaching a point in her life of letting go, of learning to 'go with the flow'; while Foreman is very much still on the side of "I thrive and keep myself safe by controlling every aspect of my life possible"– makes them fundamentally incompatible as a couple from the get-go, even with all of the chemistry they had. Because the moment they get together (the Christmas party in 5x10 "Joy to the World") is right after Thirteen's decided that she doesn't want to die; when she's just starting to process her diagnosis instead of running from it.
Do I think there was/is love there? Yes. They absolutely care about each other, both during and after the relationship.
Do I think they would have worked out long term? The simple answer is "no".
The more complicated answer is that if they had been able to avoid the fiasco of Foreman running the department and then firing Thirteen after House quit, I think they could have made it work. But it would have been rocky, and it would have been especially rough for Foreman. Extremely so if it were to reach a point where they've stayed together for years and years, and Foreman is with Thirteen when she really starts to decline with her Huntington's.
Foreman is Thirteen's friend; he's also seen people slowly wither away from degenerative disease (his mother, with Alzheimer's), and he's a neurologist (and so he knows exactly how she'll decline, down to every last detail). All of those things give him greater emotional stakes in her Huntington's diagnosis beyond what's typical. But specifically in the situation of them facing this as a couple, you have this level of involvement where Foreman– someone who needs a high amount of control to function on a fairly basic level– is in an incredibly intimate relationship with Thirteen, whose entire life is inevitably and actively slipping out of her control. And in that scenario... I think that when the decline does start happening, it would absolutely terrify Foreman. To be the one that's by her side as a partner– seeing all of it firsthand, the pain and grief and sickness? And as her significant other, being the one that would potentially become a medical proxy when she's too sick to advocate for herself, faced with the possibility of making life or death decisions (like whether or not to euthanize the woman he loves)? I think that would have the potential to utterly destroy him.
As a friend, though? ("Ex-partners who have gotten back to a shaky friendship after the breakup, and still care about each other deeply", but "friends" for short.) The entire situation completely changes. I firmly believe that post-canon, if Foreman knows House offered to kill Thirteen before he "died", he would offer to kill her in House's stead in a heartbeat (just like I think Chase does). THAT sort of involvement with Thirteen's decline and care is far less terrifying, because now this is not the decline of someone that he's based his entire future on. This is not someone he's given half of his heart to; this is not someone he's built an entire life with and entwined himself so thoroughly with.
With the way things work out in canon, they're still friends, and they still care about each other; but at the end of the day, they're two separate people with two separate lives, two separate futures. And so Foreman doesn't lose a single ounce of his control as Thirteen's is slowly taken from her, bit by bit. Witnessing that is still a pain that is unimaginable. But for him, it's survivable. And that's the key difference (and why I ship Foreteen during season five and season six, but not post canon).
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hmshermitcraft · 3 days
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Everyone knows not to frighten etho. Even if it'd be really funny, it's just not worth it. When Etho gets startled or jumpscared or frightened, he pops outta existence a little bit. He's a bit of a phantom, not the sky rats but like literally, he's a ghost.
He's not very good at being dead, not like Cleo who had full control of being a zombie or Joe who has.....some control of the jopacity...jhostlyness or whatever it is that they've got going on. Etho sucks at it, and whenever he gets startled he pops out of sight. Fully invisible, completely intangible. And he can't control it at all! He just has to wait until his nervous system reorient itself.
Poor Joel doesn't know this. Double life stabilized everyone's wonkyness for the sake of the games. So scar didn't get birdbrain'd, Jimmy didn't get hypothermia (cause despite popular belief, most netherborn are quite cold blooded to cope with the hot environment), martyn didn't have a sudden urge for human meat, and Joel didn't become a phantom. Etho was also unable to disappear which was painful but otherwise nice.
So one day Joel gets the bright idea to sneak up on Etho and scare him shitless, because it's funny and Joel shows affection via pranks and annoyance. Poor Etho didn't know what hit him, one moment he's quietly pulling weeds in his garden, the next he's scared out of his mind and completely gone.
Luckily Etho had signs on hand so he can tell Joel how uncool that was and how annoying it's gonna be to wait to come back.
Joel, to his credit, does feel really bad and since Etho's unable to finish his gardening, Joel offers to do it for him. Which he does, which is hard work, so Etho offers him his spare room so he doesn't have to make the journey all the way back.
It's not that far but he gets really lonely when he's all ghostly and he wants company.
Joel doesn't take up too much of the bed. Etho's cold, without the warmth of the sun or his jacket he's freezing in his little purgatory. Joel wakes to a presence, something not quite there but heavy against his side. It's Etho, unsurprising, who's still cold and a little transparent but peaceful all cuddled up against him.
He rolls onto his side so he can pull Etho closer, allowing him to press his cold nose into the crook of his neck. He won't scare Etho anymore, he'll find another way to show his affection.
Probably.
-carrie
Really, it's disappointing that it actually distresses Etho, because it's the funniest reaction ever. Does Etho understand how much prank potential this has? How funny it is that he just poofs when he's scared? It's hilarious. The fact it feels terrible sucks.
What Joel found out surprisingly quickly is that Etho is a lot jumpier than he expects. Joel knocked on the door, for goodness sake! What else is he supposed to do?
So far, wrapping his arms around Etho and giving him a gentle kiss has worked best. Etho says the fact somebody is touching him helps. Hardly like Joel needs an excuse to get his hands on Etho more often, but he'll take it.
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squoxle · 1 day
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˚₊‧꒰ა All Good Girls Burn In Hell ♡ S.Eunseok ff ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
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💠pairing: Eunseok x Reader!afab | 💠wc: 7.1k | 💠cw: profanity, religious themes, drug use, abuse, coercion, protected and unprotected sex | 💠plot: Your tired of being mommy’s little girl so you sneak out to a college party with the Devil’s Advocate…
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With the pressure of being the perfect daughter weighing on your shoulders, the last thing you needed right now was a boy. Especially not when that boy was Song Eunseok He was everything you weren’t and the complete opposite of what your parents believed in. Rule Breaker. Trouble Maker. Bad Boy.
His beauty... charmed you like a snake, entrapping you in his comforting grasp before crushing the life out of you.
His words... were like the devil’s music, enchanting you with his lovely tune as he led you down a path of darkness.
And his eyes... God his eyes were the most delicate yet aggressive feature of his face. Boldly standing out with a gentle aura surrounding them.
He was the perfect temptation. Sent by Satan himself to draw you away from purity and righteousness.
And you were the perfect target. You were weak and he could tell, which is what made corrupting you that much easier.
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Your home life was just about as chaotic as you'd expect an extremely religious family to be.
“Honor thy father and thy mother, for this is the first commandment with promise,” she would say this whenever you did anything remotely ‘disrespectful’ in her eyes. “Don’t you want to live a long and happy life?”
Sometimes her words felt like vain repetition or taunts echoing through your head, as her method of reprimanding you often came in the form of lectures.
The neurotic controlling nature of your mother could only be tamed by one thing—aside from the public eye—and that one thing was…your father.
Unfortunately he was no longer around and your mother often blamed you for his absence.
Your mother taught you that a wife should submit to her husband for he is the head of the family and you--as his wife--are to be his helpmate.
Though that sounds fair, for the most part, Mom had a much harsher way of embedding what she believed into the lives of her children. Especially her daughters.
After your rebellious older sister ran off 4 years ago with her motorcycle-riding girlfriend, all hell broke loose at home. You had now been promoted to the oldest of the siblings and were therefore subject to physical pain on top of everything else. It felt like you permanently resided within the confines of a chapel, which often felt more like a prison than a home.
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You’d had enough of this torture. You needed a break away from the unreasonably structured environment. Just for once, you wanted to feel like you were the one pulling the strings.
Never did you expect to hand your strings over to a new puppet master.
To keep things brief, you'd met Eunseok through your best friend Faith. Ironically, she was a girl you met at Sunday school in 9th grade who definitely wasn’t the perfect little angel people thought she was.
One time her dad almost caught her smoking outside. The way she launched that bud halfway across the street before sticking a sucker in her mouth was insane. Another time you could remember her telling you the story of how she snuck a boy into her room to have sex while her parents were sleeping…well the boy was her boyfriend, but still.
She had a wild side that you found alluring. Which made you wonder if you had a one too, well one apart from the scenarios you enacted in your imagination.
As a freshman in college, you were ready to try to relax a little.
"Or maybe not," you thought to yourself as you woke up to the sound of religious music playing from the kitchen. Your mother did this nearly every morning at the exact same time, almost like clockwork.
You could smell the coffee brewing, coupled with the scent of bread toasting. You knew you could only roll around in bed for a few more minutes before it was time to get up. Not only did you still have a bedtime, but you also had a specific time to wake up. No later than 8 o'clock were you expected to be out of your pajamas and have your bed made.
"Nothing comes to a man in his sleep, but dreams," another saying your mother loved repeating.
You lived in a house with two younger twin brothers and shared a room with your big sister. Though, now that she was gone, dust bunnies were the only thing sleeping in her bed.
One thing you had to learn was to be the first one in the bathroom. Sometimes you'd get up earlier to avoid the chaotic morning bustle.
After getting dressed you grabbed an apple for breakfast and waited for your mom to drop you off for your first day of uni. Luckily, you and Faith were going to the same university, so that eliminated the anxiety that came with being completely alone on a huge campus for the next four years of your life.
Unfortunately, loneliness, like most of your other personal problems, was none of your mother's concern. "Read and pray," she'd tell you. "The Lord will comfort you."
As this was your first semester in college, you decided to knock out a good chunk of your core classes, English, Math, History, and Politics.
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After 3 hours that felt more like a lifetime, your first lecture had finally ended. By now hungry didn't compare to what you were experiencing right now. Unfortunately, you forgot to bring your wallet which meant that water would have to fill you up for now.
“I can already tell this semester is going suck ass. And the next 16 weeks of my life or going to be a nightmare from hell,” Faith sighed as she dropped her backpack on the ground beside her.
You had met up with her outside at one of the round red tables that were scattered across the open green field.
"Oh, come on you can’t say that. It’s only the first day, give it about a week or so, and then see if you still feel the same way," you said trying to encourage her to look on the bright side.
"No, you don’t get it. This guy hates me, like literally hates me. You should've seen the way he looked at me," she sighed. "God, he was such a fucking scumbag."
"Who?"
"My stupid fucking sociology professor. He started nagging about some bullshit and I called him out for it," she rolled her eyes before pulling out a box of cigarettes. "Want one?"
"No, thanks," you held your hand up. "Wait this is a no-smoking zone," you said as Faith lit the end.
"Shit, my bad," she shrugged before picking up her bag and walking off. "You're coming, aren't you? You're not just gonna tell me I can't smoke here and expect me to go off by myself," she held the cigarette between her two fingers.
"No, sorry, I'm coming," you stuttered.
"You better."
You followed your blue-eyed friend to a brick wall that was high enough that when you sat on it your feet couldn't touch the ground.
"So I guess we found our secret place," Faith smiled. "A sweet escape from the terrors of uni and their stupid, boring bullshit," she puffed.
You and Faith often found little areas that you claimed as your own. This was just another spot to add to your map of many discrete destinations.
"Woah, what the hell was that?" Faith looked as your stomach growled uncomfortably loud.
"All I had was an apple this morning and I'm starving," you sighed before cracking open your water bottle to take a sip.
"Well, that water isn't gonna do shit for ya. Let's go grab you something to eat," she hopped off the wall before putting her cigarette out on a rock.
"I can't...I forgot my wallet at home and my mom is already on her way here," you sighed before joining her on the ground.
"So what? I have money. Besides, it's not like she's gonna kill you for grabbing something to eat," Faith slung her bag over her shoulder. "I'm kinda hungry myself."
You’d be lying if you said you didn't have a slight gut feeling that your mom would be upset about this. But maybe Faith was right. There's no way your mom would get mad at you for eating...right?
After splitting a sandwich you headed to the front of the school to find your mom parked in a handicap spot. You waved to Faith as you walked over to the passenger side of the vehicle.
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"So, how was your first day of college?" your mom asked as you buckled your seatbelt.
"It was good," you nodded as your mom pulled down the sun visor to reapply her Cherry Blossom Bliss tinted lipgloss. "How was your day?" you asked as you placed your bag on the floor between your legs as you looked out of the window.
"Good," she said plainly as she closed the car mirror and closed her gloss before tucking it away in her clutch bag.
You drove around a bit in silence before you heard the sound of her coin-filled bag swinging through the air. Hitting you in the mouth. Strangely enough, you heard the soft jingle before you actually felt the pain.
"Don't ever keep me waiting like that again. When I come here to pick you up you need to be ready," your mother said as you turned to her in shock, covering your mouth that was now decorated with a sliver of blood that seeped through the crack of your lower lip.
"But, I--" Your attempt to explain yourself was cut off by the stinging pain from your head as your mother dug her nails into your scalp.
"Are you talking back? Don't talk back to me you fucking brat," she spat. At this point, you knew that saying or doing anything else was just going to trigger her to spiral so you wiped the tear from your eye, attempted to fix your hair, and sat back in silence until you made it home.
It was moments like this that you wanted someone to vent to. But what good would that do? Even if you told Faith about this nothing would change. This was your life and the only smart thing you could do was learn from your mistakes.
Don't be late.
Don't talk back.
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The next couple of weeks were like the first minus getting attacked for being late. You went to class, you did your homework, and you hung out with Faith. Today, your class had ended early since it was almost spring break and you took this as an opportunity to spend more time with Faith before your mom came to pick you up.
But today was a day to mark on your calendar as the beginning of your ending...
“Hey, Faith,” you said shyly as you noticed the two boys that sat with her. One of them being none other than Eunseok.
She waved to you tapping a spot beside her for you to sit. “Hey girl, we were just talking about going to one of the fraternity houses this weekend for a little get-together,” she smiled mischievously. "What d'you say? Wanna join us for some life-changing fun?"
You knew that look, and nothing good ever came from that. You’d been invited to gatherings like this before and always declined. You never regretted your decision either, especially when she’d tell you about all of the horrible things that happened. Faith never saw the stories how you did, they all sounded like exciting retellings of the glorious moments you missed out on.
"No that's alright," you chuckled as she glared at you with her big blue puppy dog eyes.
"Pleeeeeease," she whined, pouting her lips and squeezing your thigh.
"No, Faith," you giggled. "You're just gonna run off and leave me all by myself."
"I'll be there," Eunseok smirked. "In case she does abandon you," he sat on the opposite side of you placing his arm behind you.
"I-uhh," you stammered.
"Cool it big boy, she's not into that kind of stuff," Faith budded.
"Oh, sorry. I didn't know she was gay," Eunseok said, slightly backing away.
"Oh no. I'm not gay," you spat.
"Okay then, lesbian? Bisexual?"
"No, I'm straight. I just don't like boys," you were doing an awful job at pleading your case and you could see Faith holding in her laughter as she watched the awkward interaction between you two.
"How the hell are you straight, but you don't like boys? That makes no fucking sense."
"No. Wait. I like boys, but I'm not allowed to date."
"Who said anything about dating," he chuckled. "Are you already trying to claim me?"
"I never said that. I mean. Ugh, nevermind," you sighed.
"Relax, I'm just joking. Faith already told me about preserving your purity."
"Yep, I sure did. So you don't have to worry about him trying to lead you astray," Faith smiled.
"Eh hmm," the other boy cleared his throat.
"Oh, right. I forgot. This is Theo. I met him a year ago at a party and we've been friends ever since," Faith said as the boy waved.
"You got me over here feeling like an outcast," he smirked.
"Well, she barely knows that goofball, Eunseok. I think this was the first conversation they ever had." Their conversation faded in the background as you dug deep into your mind only to realize that this was your first time actually speaking to Eunseok.
You were much younger when you first met and you've always been one to keep to yourself. Plus, your sister had just left and life at home wasn't so great. So there wasn't much to talk about.
"So, you're coming right?"
"Huh?"
"The party this weekend...you're coming right?" Faith asked again.
"I don't think so. Sorry," you replied.
"Hmm...well I'm not gonna force you. Maybe next time," she said patting your shoulder. "Oh shit," she sighed as you noticed your mom walking over to you.
"I've been waiting in the car for over an hour now and you're out here goofing off with boys?"
"Mom, it's not like that I was just--"
"I don't wanna hear it. Go get in the car. Right now. We're going home," your mom looked everything but happy right now. She must've known you got out early and had been waiting for you all this time. Scared didn't begin to describe what you were feeling right now.
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To your surprise, the entire ride was silent. Even when you made it home, pure silence. You went upstairs to take a shower before going to your room to study.
As you were going through your drawers to pick out an outfit, a head-spinning blow knocked you to the ground. Your mother's angry face hovered over you as she raised her hand to hit you again.
"You attention-seeking slut," she sneered. "You're just like your whoring sister," she hummed before grabbing your hair and dragging you to the middle of your room.
"I didn't do anything! I swear," you whined. "We were just talking!"
"First you'll have boys kissing and touching all over you. And the next thing you know, you'll be with a girl too. You'll be confused and broken. Just like your sister," your mother's eyes pierced through your soul like fiery daggers as she continued to berate you.
"I wish you had been born a boy like your brothers. I'd rather have a house full of men than one filled with whores in training," her words lingered in the air as she walked over to your bedroom door. "Sometimes, I wish your sister would've taken you with her."
Every word you thought of saying was caught in your throat. You were being choked by an overwhelming feeling of hopelessness and disparity. This was a common pattern whenever your mom would get violent.
Senseless slut shaming and misjudgment of your character coupled with the clawing sensation of her nails digging into your scalp was too much.
Dragging your hand across your face, you wiped the tears from your cheeks as you curled up into a ball on the floor. The sound of the ceiling fan clinking blended with the ticking of the clock that hung on your wall. You ended up falling asleep on the floor with your knees to your chest.
If not for the lamp on your desk, you'd be in complete darkness.
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The next morning you woke up earlier than you normally would. This gave you a chance to shower before going to school.
The water ran down your body as you thought back to what happened last night. You turned your back to the pouring water but flinched as you were met with a stinging pain. You looked over your shoulder to see small scratches on your back--likely from being dragged across the carpet floor.
You searched under the bathroom cabinet for something to clean the wound with. Nothing but a bottle of toner stared back at you.
"Well there's alcohol in it," you mumbled to yourself as you poured the liquid on a cotton ball. You dabbed every spot within your reach before throwing your clothes on.
"You alright?" Eunseok asked. His voice caught you off guard as you drifted off into your thoughts. Faith had walked off for a smoke break with Theo, leaving you behind with the dark-eyed boy.
"Yeah," you smiled feignly.
His energy was different than it had been before. Maybe it was because he saw how your mom behaved when she saw you guys talking.
"You sure? Don't take this the wrong way, but you look like shit," he said tilting his head to meet your eyes.
"There's just a lot on my mind right now," you sighed.
"Wanna talk about it? I'm a pretty good listener."
"No, I'm okay. It's not like that'll do anything anyway," you sniffed. Crying was the one thing you'd never do in public. And you'd rather struggle on your own than bring other people into your personal business for no reason.
"Alright, fine. Well then how about we not talk about it together this weekend."
"I can't go to that party. My mom would kill me."
"Well, you look like you're halfway in the grave already. You could use a bit of excitement in your life."
"But I've never...I can't..."
"You're an adult. You can't let your mom dictate your life forever," you were quiet before he continued. "I'm sure you can just ask your dad, right?"
"Yeah, that would probably work if he was still around."
"Oh...sorry I didn't know."
"It's fine. He's not dead, but he might as well be. I'm sure my mom would be happier if he was."
"If you don't me asking...what happened anyway?"
"Well, basically he left us because my mom is literally insane. They would always fight. And one night he came into our bedroom and slid a note under our pillow," you thought back to the feeling of him placing a kiss on your forehead as you laid there pretending to be asleep. You watched as he wiped the tears from his face. To this day you regret not saying anything. Not doing anything.
"That was the last time you saw him?"
"Yeah..."
"You're going to that party," Eunseok whispered before placing his hand on top of yours.
"How?"
"I'll sneak you out on Saturday night," He said pulling out his phone. "What's your number?"
You looked down at your hands as you shamefully replied. "Even if I give you my phone number, my mom takes it at night time..."
"Damn. Well, I'll just give you my old phone. I barely use it now so I won't be looking for it," he said reaching into his bag. He pulled out the smaller black phone which was protected by a bulky plastic case. "It's a dinosaur, but it still works," he chuckled.
"Are you sure? What if I get caught?"
"Relax, you won't. You just have to keep it hidden until tomorrow night. After that, you're in the clear," he smiled.
"Okay, but if I get in trouble it's all you're fault and I'll probably never forgive you," you said as you took the phone from his hands.
Maybe a night out would do you good...
To be completely honest, it didn't take much convincing to get you on board. He was attractive as hell and as much as you hated it, he definitely had an effect on you.
"Deal," he chuckled as he watched you slip the phone into your bag.
"What are you losers yapping about?" Faith grinned as she skipped back over to you and Eunseok.
"Uh--"
"I was just helping our little friend plan her escape," Eunseok said, cutting you off as he pulled you in for a side hug. "Isn't that right?"
You nodded as Theo clapped his hands together. "Awesome! Another innocent soul to claim for Satan," he words sent chills up your spine as you thought back to what happened the night before.
"Hey? You alright?" Faith asked as your face went blank.
"Yeah...I was just umm...I was just thinking about some stuff," you replied, trying your best to play it off. "Shoot!" you spat.
"What?" Faith asked.
"My mom is on her way. I gotta go," You snatched your bag up and began walking off.
"Oh...but--"
"Sorry, I don't wanna get in trouble again," you continued as you drifted back into your thoughts.
"Hey," you felt a large hand palm your shoulder. You whipped around to see Eunseok standing in front of you. "If you ever need someone to talk to, remember that I'm here for you," you nodded as his hands slid down your arms to your hands.
A warm feeling rushed to your face as all of your previous worries melted away. It was like he was the first person to take your mind off of everything negative in your life. He was like a drug and you were afraid to get addicted.
You both stared at each other for a bit before he pulled you in for a hug. "I'll be over to break you out tomorrow night. Don't forget, okay?" His voice sounded even more soothing when he held you close. The gentle vibrations from his throat were just about as relaxing as soaking in a hot tub.
You hummed in response before walking off to join your mom in the car.
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11:24pm tomorrow night...
You quietly tiptoed through the darkness of your bedroom to your dresser. You pulled out the bottom drawer to grab Eunseok's phone from its hidden place.
Feelings of guilt, fear, and anxiety tugged at your heart as you thought back to the moment between you and your mom in the car the day before.
"I'm really sorry for how I reacted the other day..." your mom bit her lip as she gripped the steering wheel. "It's just that I'm afraid to lose you the way I lost your sister..."
You could feel the genuine pain and regret in her tone as she poured out to you.
"I don't want you to make terrible mistakes that you'll regret in the future. And sometimes...exploding is the only way I know how to fix it. That's how my parents were with me."
This was no excuse for her actions, but this did make you feel a sense of pity for her. It was almost enough to make you cancel. But you needed this more than anything else right now.
You just wanted a small taste of what else life had to offer you...
Anything was better than spending all of your free time in this hellhole.
You powered the phone on to text Eunseok.
"She's sleep. You can come pick me up whenever." you sighed as you waited anxiously for him to text back.
"Alright, princess. Your knight in shining armor is on the way to rescue you from the evil dragon." Reading his text made you giggle a bit as you struggled to find anything remotely skimpy to wear. Nothing but an old baby blue dress from your sister hung idly in the back of your closet.
You quickly hopped into the dress and slipped into a pair of silver heels.
*Tap. Tap. Tap*
The tapping sound from the window nearly made you jump out of your skin. The moonlight dimly lit your features as you turned to see Eunseok's face behind the glass. You tapped your finger against your lips, signalling him to stop.
You opened the window and stuck out your first leg to climb out. Eunseok came close to guide you out by the waist. "You ready?" he smirked.
"Yeah," you nodded.
"Then let's get the hell out of here," he chuckled, grabbing your hand and running with you to his orange Dodge Challenger. You climbed into the passenger seat as Eunseok closed the door behind you.
Your heart was beating fast as hell, probably the fastest it's ever beat in your life. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah," you lied. Your throat was so dry it felt like you had cotton in your mouth.
"You might be able to lie to your mom, but you can't lie to me. You look like a scared little puppy," he smiled, scanning your body. "Nice dress."
"Thanks, it was my sister's."
"Well you look amazing in it," he turned the keys and you felt the seats rumble gently beneath you. You watched as Eunseok reached down to pull out a V-pen. He breathed in slowly before blowing out the sweet strawberry-scented vapor. "Here. Take this. It'll relax you," he said handing your the plug.
"Uhh...I'm okay. I don't smoke."
"Come on, just try it once. If you don't like it you can stop."
You hesitantly opened your mouth as he brought the device to your lips.
"Just suck it in slowly. Let it fill your lungs and don't try breathing out of your nose at the same time--" You began coughing aggressively, cutting him off mid-sentence. "Or that'll happen," he chuckled, before patting your back.
You looked at him through watery eyes as he reached to hand you a water bottle. "Don't worry, I didn't drink any of it yet."
"Thanks," you sniffed.
"So, what'd you think? D'you like it?"
"It tastes good, but to be honest I didn't notice much of a difference aside from coughing my brains out."
"Well, that one was kinda weak. Hold on. Imma give you something a little stronger," he smiled as he drove to a red light. "Look in the glove box and pull out that little red case," he directed you, pointing his finger at the glove box.
You sifted through the other miscellaneous objects before finding the red case. You placed it in his hand and watched as he pulled out another smoking device.
"Alright, I'm gonna go first and you just copy me okay?" he licked his lips before clasping them around the metal tip. "Just take a little bit first," he said after blowing out the cloud of smoke.
Remembering the mistake you made last time, you sucked in slowly.
"Woah, woah. That should be good enough," Eunseok chuckled as you inhaled the herby smoke.
You blew out the smoke, filling the car with the scent. You still coughed a bit, but it wasn't as bad as before. "That's weed, by the way," Eunseok smiled. "You should be feeling it in a bit."
He wasn't wrong either. You felt a sense of alertness wash over you.
"We're almost there," Eunseok said as he entered a subdivision before pulling up to a house shortly after. Cars were lined up the street, most likely belonging to the other partygoers. You could even hear the music blasting as you sat in the car with Eunseok.
This was the first time you finally noticed that Faith wasn't there. The amount of questionable decisions you were making in such a short time even shocked you.
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You walked with Eunseok into to the lively house party hosted by Theo who greeted you at the door with Jell-O shots. "It's about time you got here, princess. We've been waiting for you," he smiled as he took down the cherry-flavored shot you rejected. "Did you get my message?"
"What message?" you asked.
"This one," he said, grabbing your hand to spin you around. "Wanna dance?"
"No, that's alright," you chuckled as he pouted playfully.
"Your loss. I'm a terrific dancer--"
"If by terrific you mean terrible then I'd definitely agree with you," Faith said cutting Theo off. "Hey girl, what do you think of the party? Are you enjoying yourself?"
"Well, we just got here a couple minutes ago."
"Yeah, and I was having a conversation with her until you came over here interrupting us," he poked her nose.
"Puh-lease. I'm sure she's glad I came over here to save her from your boring ass."
"Boring? Boring?! I'll show you whose boring."
"I'm already looking at you dummy," Faith playfully pushed Theo's shoulder. "If you really wanna dance then let's go," she giggled, leading Theo to a corner by the tip of his chin.
"Heh, later princess," he waved to you.
You watched as Theo grabbed Faith's hips. She swayed her hips, grinding her ass against him as he nuzzled into the crook of her neck. A seductive smirk crept across her face as Theo turned her around to face him. He caressed her thigh as he lifted her leg, wrapping it around him. He slowly leaned into her lips, hanging centimeters away from her soft pink lips before she placed her finger on his lips.
"I thought we were just dancing," she beamed.
"Dancing and kissing?" he chuckled awkwardly.
"Uh uh. Man, these shots have you acting extra horny today huh?"
You shook your head, scanning the room for Eunseok. You couldn't believe you were staring at them for that long. You didn't see him anywhere in the kitchen so you went out into the hall to look for him somewhere else.
To be honest, if Faith wasn’t busy teasing Theo, you'd probably be hanging out with her right now. But, Eunseok wasn’t so bad. You actually enjoyed his company. 
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Still feeling a bit fuzzy and lightheaded from the hit earlier you swayed through the partygoers, silently searching for a familiar face. You were more of a shy person, so engaging with random strangers wasn’t exactly at the top of your list. 
“Hey, ~” a dark-haired girl waved to you as she was being dragged off to a bedroom down the hall. “Wanna come have fun with us?” 
“No, that’s alright,” you smiled sheepishly. 
“Oh come on, baby. I’ll make it worth your while,” the boy said, releasing the other girl’s hand to run his nose against the skin on your neck. 
“I said, no,” you spat, pushing him away after he licked the exposed skin on your chest.
“Oh, you wanna play hard to get, huh?” He smirked devilishly as he pressed you against the wall. 
You struggled beneath his weight as you looked down to see that the girl had passed out on the floor. Knowing that this was going nowhere good, you swung your free hand to hit him straight in the mouth. 
“Argh!” He winced, licking the blood from the broken skin on his lower lip. “You little bitch! You’re gonna regret doing that,” he spat, grabbing your wrist, and twisting it slightly. You groaned at the burning pain travelling down your arm before kicking him between his legs which made him drop to the floor. 
While he was on his knees swearing and shouting out all of the horrible things he was gonna do to you, you shook the collapsed girl to try and wake her up. There was no way in hell you were gonna leave her in the hands of this monster. 
“Are we gonna play now?” She hummed. “Hmm, I’m sleepy. Can I stay here?” 
“No, come on. I gotta get you out of here,” you tugged at her arms. “No girl left behind.”
The boy must’ve been feeling better by the time you finally got her to stand as you felt a set of hands push you to the ground. He grabbed you by the ankles and started to drag you down the hall. 
Even though you kicked your legs in an attempt to fight him off, it was useless, he was much stronger than you and you didn’t stand a chance against him now. 
Dazed, but conscious enough to see what was going on, the dark-haired girl ran off. 
“Dammit,” you thought to yourself. Closing your eyes shut, you prepared yourself to just accept your fate. A set of footsteps ran up the hall toward you as you felt the boy drop your legs to the ground. 
“Ugh!” He groaned as you opened your eyes to see a beer bottle had been smashed against his head. 
You watched as Eunseok punched the boy in the face until blood came from his nose. His hair bounced at the force of every blow. You could tell he had broken his nose by the way his face had contorted. 
“Let’s go,” Eunseok said, looking at you still on the ground. He grabbed the boy by the shirt and proceeded to drag him to the front door. “Does your brother know you’re here?” He spat looking to the dark-haired girl who you assumed ran to get Eunseok. 
“I’m almost 18. I can make my own decisions,” she stuttered. 
“Right, and we see where that almost got you. Come on, I’m taking you home,” Eunseok said as he walked up to a dark-skinned guy. “Lance! Can you keep an eye on this fucker? The cops are already on their way for him.” Eunseok said as he abandoned the lunatic who tried to assault you and the other girl. “He was trying to make a move on Eunchae.”
“Sure, man. I’ll hold him until the cops get here,” the boy whom Eunseok called Lance smiled as Eunseok walked outside with you and the other girl. “Tell your brother I said hi,” he chuckled as you walked outside. 
“Get your ass in the backseat,” Eunseok spat as Eunchae folded her arms. “And put this on,” He said as he pulled off his oversized varsity jacket and draped it over her shoulders. 
“Wait! I forgot my phone,” Eunchae exclaimed as the car started up. 
“Too bad, I’ll have Theo hold onto it for you. We’re leaving,” Eunchae sat quietly in the backseat as you drove almost 30 minutes to a black and white apartment complex. 
Acting like a spoiled child, Eunchae refused to go up the stairs. You could see that Eunseok was more than fed up with her bullshit as he threw her over his shoulder and walked up the stairs to knock on the door. 
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Eunseok, placed Eunchae on the doormat in front of him as he waited for the door to open.
“You’re not doing a very good job at babysitting her, Seunghan. Maybe you should send her back by your mom and dad,” he said as he poked her cheek. 
“Yeah, I might do that because she’s obviously not ready to be an adult yet—“
“No! Ugh! You never let me do anything,” she huffed as she stormed to her room.
“Thanks for bringing her back, bro. I thought she wasn’t feeling well because she went to bed early.”
“Eh, it’s alright. But you seriously need to keep an eye on her. Oh, and Theo has her phone. He’ll probably bring it over later.”
“Okay, it’s not like she needs it anyway,” Seunghan chuckled as he closed the door.
You followed Eunseok back to the car as he started it up again. 
“Sorry,” he said after taking a hit of the weed from earlier. “I’m pretty sure this wasn’t exactly the fairytale ending you were expecting,” he sighed.
"Well, it's definitely been interesting," you scoffed lightheartedly.
"Did you want to go back to the party or to my place? It's quieter there."
"Umm, wherever you want to go is fine with me."
You were hoping that he'd choose his place. Mainly because the party felt more like a freak show, a disaster waiting to happen.
"M'kay. My place it is," he said before pulling off.
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He didn't live far from Seunghan so the drive was relatively short. You followed him up the stairs before entering his apartment which was uncomfortably cold.
You wrapped your arms around yourself in an attempt to contain some of the heat that was rapidly escaping your body.
"I would've offered you my jacket, but I already gave it to Eunchae," Eunseok said as he turned off the air.
"It's alright," you said sucking in your breath.
"C'mere," Eunseok whispered softly as he pulled you into his grasp.
Your cheeks burned hot as you felt the warmth from his body coupled with the feeling of his breath on your neck.
After a short silent moment, he turned your body to face him. He was met with a warm and submissive look on your face. A sense of innocence wrapped up by desire.
He leaned in to kiss your lips. Little did he know that this was your first kiss.
You freely allowed him to take the lead biting and sucking on your lips as he pulled your body closer to his. You quickly pulled away as you felt his bulge brush up against your core.
“You okay?”
“Yeah,” you lied as you eyes fell to the ground.
“We don’t have to do this if you don’t—“
“No, I want to. It’s just that…”
“It’s just what?”
“I haven’t really done anything like this before.”
“Kissing or sex?”
“Both…”
“Oh…sorry, I didn’t know. I kinda just assumed you had done something.”
“There’s a lot that I haven’t done.”
“Well we can stop now if you want.”
“No, I want to keep going. Just take it slow with me.”
Eunseok led you to his room that was fairly empty. Nothing but a king-sized bed, a small night stand, and a laundry bin occupied the floor space.
You stood at the foot of his bed as he began kissing you again. Though this was your first kiss, you never expected it to feel so good. Again, you felt his hardness press against you, but this time you welcomed the sensation.
You felt his hands blindly move across your back stopping at the zipper before pulling it down. He pulled out of the kiss to slide your dress down before directing you to stand up and sit on his lap.
You couldn’t deny the fact that you felt a bit shy about being naked in front of someone.
He slid your panties down before he wrapped an arm around you. He reached his finger down to glide between your lips. The amount of wetness definitely wasn’t ready for his cock just yet, so he spit on his fingers before massaging your clit.
You jerked your body as he used his fingers on you. Gripping onto his arms, you threw your head back as he inserted one finger into your pussy. Your tightness gripped around his finger as you let out a soft moan.
He slowly pulled his finger back and forth grazing the flesh of your g-spot before picking up the pace.
You watched as he pulled his finger out completely covered in your wetness.
“Okay, what do you want to do first? We can go straight into sex or I can eat you out?”
“I wanna go straight into sex,” you replied as you stood up.
“M’kay. Let me go grab something first,” he said before leaving the room. You waited on his bed, playing with the wetness between your legs.
He came back shortly after and pulled down his pants to reveal his pulsing hard-on.
“I’m gonna put this on to make it easier for you,” he said as torn open the packaging that contained a dark blue condom. You watch as he slid it down his length before climbing onto the bed. “You’re gonna get on top okay,” he continued as you hesitantly straddled him.
You leaned forward to place your hands on his chest as he guided his cock to your opening. Slowly, he pulled you hips down gliding his lubricated dick deep inside of you. You whined as he broke through your hymen. A slight burning feeling filled your core.
“Mmm, fuck,” he groaned as he thrusted into your pussy. More swears left his lips before he came inside of the condom. You felt his warm seed fill you up as he laid there breathless.
“I didn’t expect you to be so fucking tight,” he groaned. “Alright, now you gotta suck the cum off so I can fuck you raw. That was my last rubber,” he sighed, fluffing his hair between his fingers.
He pulled the condom off before you went down to wrap your lips around him, sucking off the cum before gagging slightly on his length.
Once clean he bent you over on your hands and knees and plowed into your pussy as you came closer to your climax. He pulled out his cock to insert two of his digits into your gummy hole as you reached between your legs to rub your clit.
Breathless, moaning, and panting you came all over his fingers screaming out his name. He held you down and pushed in his cock to feel you pussy clench around him as you slowly came down from your high.
You collapsed on the bed from exhaustion and satisfaction as Eunseok stroked his length.
“Fuck, that was amazing,” he sighed as he kissed your shoulder. “Don’t worry, I’ll get you home before sunrise. Just get some rest for now,” he said as he saw your legs trembling from the orgasm.
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This definitely wasn’t the night you were expecting, but you couldn’t say that you didn’t enjoy it.
You watched as Eunseok pulled his jeans up before stepping out on the balcony to smoke. Your eyes fluttered gently as you watched the puffs of smoke escape his lips. He ruffled his hair again before coming inside to join you in bed.
He guided your head to rest on his chest. The gentle hums relaxed you till you eventually fell asleep.
You don’t know what time you got in the car or what time he drove you home, but he made sure to bring you back before the sun came out.
Even though this had just happened the day before, you already couldn’t wait for your next opportunity to sneak out.
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❀ Thank you all so much for reading! Make sure to check out other works on my masterlist!
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❀ 𝚃𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜��: @chlorinecake @hoyeonheeseung @addictedtohobi @chaenqen @nikisvanillaccola @mrswolfhard3 @hynjinnn1 @melobin @laylasbunbunny @urfavberry @swaggyjinnie @j4yluv @mimikittysblog @wonbinisbabygurl
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Martin Pengelly at The Guardian:
Protesters calling for Israel to cease fire in its war with Hamas who have disrupted US public events and infrastructure are practicing “leftwing fascism” or “leftwing totalitarianism”, a senior US House Democrat said, adding that such protesters are “challenging representative democracy” and should be arrested.
“Intimidation is the tactic,” said Adam Smith of Washington state, the ranking Democrat on the House armed services committee. “Intimidation and an effort to silence opposition … I don’t know if there’s such a thing as leftwing fascism. If you want to just call it leftwing totalitarianism, then that’s what it is. It is a direct challenge to representative democracy now.” Smith was speaking – before the outbreak this week of mass protests on US college campuses, many producing arrests – to the One Decision Podcast and its guest host Christina Ruffini, a CBS News reporter. Ruffini asked Smith about protests in his district, including vandalism at his home and a town hall meeting disrupted by protesters demanding an end to the Israeli bombardment of Gaza prompted by attacks by Hamas on 7 October. Disruptive, aggressive protests are “illegal … completely wrong … and enormously dangerous”, Smith said, adding: “I really want people to understand – and I put out a statement after they shut down a town hall meeting that I was trying to have [in March] – what’s going on here. “And everyone’s like, ‘Well, you understand their passion and all that. And I do understand that, I do. This is a life-or-death situation. It is certainly not the only life-or-death situation that I and all policymakers deal with. But it is one that is important. But that’s not what [the protesters are] doing. “What they are trying to do is they are trying to silence opposition and intimidate decision-makers. I’ve been doing town hall meetings for 34 years now, in some pretty hotly contested environments … [but] I have never had a town hall that I couldn’t keep under control enough so that people had the chance to say their piece. “But [the protesters’] goal and their objective was not to get their point across. It was to silence anyone who dared to disagree with them, to make sure that only one voice was heard. And their other goal was to intimidate. That’s why they’re showing up at member’s houses.”
[...] “I got two words into it and they started screaming at me again. So this is a different thing than your standard protest. In my view, the solution to it is if they are committing a crime – which by the way, shutting down a freeway, shutting down an airport, intimidating people, there’s a crime – [they] ought to be arrested.” Protesting at public figures’ homes should also be subject to arrest, Smith said. “The point of it is intimidation. And I think it is harassment. It’s a crime, and I think [they should] be arrested for it. “… But you know, when you are shutting down freeways, shutting down airports, frankly putting people’s lives at risk – If you’re an ambulance trying to get through to hospital – then that’s going beyond getting your point across, and you’re trying to intimidate and silence people in a way that I think is troubling.”
Excuse me, Rep. Adam Smith (D-WA)?! Pro-Palestinian protesters on college campuses are not the ones silencing the opposition, but pro-Israel Apartheid apologists like you are the ones squelching freedom of speech.
Your call to arrest the protesters reeks of fascism!
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cressthebest · 2 days
Text
Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 21
chapter 36:
1. “It's been so long. Oh, there you are, here you are, hi,” *deep breath* AHHHHHHHHH
2. 😭😭😭 “Remus keeps a firm grip on him and turns around to promptly leave, which is probably a little rude, considering that the others are here and may wish to greet him, but he honestly can't bring himself to care about that right now” i would expect nothing less
3. WOLFSTAR REUNION!!!! I AM IN SHAMBLES!
4. “On the way, James glances back with a grin, internally wishing Sirius all the good things, because no one deserves them more.”
oh. wow. that’s such a soft line. it’s literally making me melt
5. “Remus could not be more in love if he tried.” shit shit shit shit sobbing. wolfstar deserves the world
6. “He does love Sirius, though. Loves him dearly, with every defiant bone in his body. This man, who doesn't even realize the importance of what he's just done by giving Remus an unopened envelope. Remus, who owns nothing. Remus, who has nothing. Remus, who is not granted privacy or freedom for anything like this, for anything at all.”
i am on PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION and i am BAWLING my eyes out as silently as i possibly can. y’all don’t understand the restraint i have right now to not loudly sob
7. the LETTER has me CRYING
8. THE SECRET MESSAGE
9. oh, okay. remus killed an auror/greyback. it’s honestly not as bad as i thought it would be. also, i love the lily and remus duo. they’re so iconic
10. i LOVE LOVE LOVE that zar made a point for sirius to have the discussion that his demisexuality is NOT because of trauma and he’s always been that way. it’s beautiful <3
11. “”You can ask Regulus and James; I walked around for a solid month making everyone call me Mr. Sirius Macdonald."” STOP PLSS THATS SO FUNNY
12. SIRIUS JUST TOLD REMUS HE LOVED HIM!!! this is literally so sweet
13. andjskjdksksjsms the authors note:
“sirius, internally: a guillotine could not sever the head im about to give this man. good for them 😌”
chapter 37:
1. i’m starting a gofundme to get regulus a balcony
2. "”Sirius doesn't let me drink," James replies flatly.
"Well, don't say it like that, James. You make it sound like I'm a strict parent, or a controlling spouse," Sirius grumbles. "And I do let you drink, in moderation, when you're in a safe environment and in a good mental state. Don't forget to mention that you only let me drink within those same rules."”
i bet james is upset with the rules he made for sirius so long ago. came back to bite him in the ass
3. describing sirius as “ruffled like an offended bird” has done wonders for my mental health
4. james, remus, and sirius are all hanging out and i am beyond angry that peter doesn’t get to share this moment
5. pandora is such an angel and doesn’t deserve this pain
6. pandora and reg friendship >>>>>>>>>
7. their outfits for the night!! every last one of them is slaying so hard
8. “There's a tense moment where a group of murderers all stare around at each other, not opposed to adding a few more names to their lists. Oh, and Pandora is there, too, startlingly calm despite this.”
yaxley needs to shut his fucking mouth and stop implying that sirius will fuck his way through issues
9. “"You know what they'll assume we're doing."
"Running away," Regulus mutters.
James sighs in exasperation and fond amusement. "No, Reg. Fucking. They'll assume we've snuck off to find a corner to go fuck in."”
😭😭😭😭😭 i love reg. he’s so ready to leave
10. jegulus is getting their shit together and improving. i’m so glad
11. “James swallows. "They're—they destroy things now, when they never did before. They're rough sometimes. Bloody."
"Warm," Regulus counters, pressing another kiss to James' shaking fingers. "Steady. Strong. These hands hold the people you love. These hands care for them. They're gentle. Tender."”
this is love. what they have is love. it’s messy and broken and so difficult, but they’re trying and it’s love
12. and once again we have wolfstar my true loves ☺️☺️
i feel like nows a good time to add to respect bizzarestars’ wishes to not have the fic reposted or reuploaded a different site. i can’t remember his wishes about bookbinding, but respect those as well.
thank you, lovely people
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cripplecharacters · 2 days
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that has a supporting character with dwarfism, and he's really close with his older brother, who is pretty tall. would it be weird if i sometimes had the younger ask his older brother pick him up so he can reach things? its supposed to be a cute little quirk of theirs that shows their bond, but i'm worried it might come off as weird for some reason. also, do you guys could give me a couple more tips on writing a character with dwarfism, if you have any? thanks in advance! (2/2)
Hi! the guy who asked about less talkative autistic characters here. sorry about that! i was going for more of like... don't talk to a point where it wouldn't be considered "socially acceptable?" but i had a character limit so i couldn't really get my point across that well. now that i think about it, that would probably also be lumped into just, yknow, not being talkative too. anyways, i have another unrelated question! probably equally silly but w/e. i'm writing a slice-of-life story (1/2)
Hello lovely asker!
I just wanna say that because of the ask backlog and the rotation of mods I'm afraid I don't know what ask your talking about, but I'm sure it was simply just a question that was in good faith of curiosity which is what this blog is for 😊
And to answer your question, I'm curious with how old the younger brother is. I haven't been picked up since I was probably about five to help me reach something and even then I was getting yelled at for climbing counters and such. If the younger brother isn't a very young child I would avoid this.
Being picked up is a general no. if you wouldn't do it to anyone else don't do it to someone with dwarfism or any person with a disability. Unless it's under their explicit permission, or help with transferring (from say a mobility aid to a bed or another place etc) or life or death situation, it's almost always a no.
Instead using things like the broom handle to hit tall switches or they even have these things called a "Reacher Grabber" that makes grabbing high up things super easy. Stool also are a big help, the small collapsible ones are easy to carry and move, and certain placed handles help too. Tall people are an advantage I will say though. Having the older brother bring something down to the younger brother is fine. Also have the younger brother climb things and stack objects and use the environment around him so he can get what he wants. I assure you this is what most of us do a lot.
A few more writing tips I have would be:
Research different types of dwarfism and find out which one you want your character to have and how this will affect him. It doesn't have to be mentioned at all but you knowing what type will give you much more insight into building this character.
Don't be afraid to give them mobility aids. A lot of people with Dwarfism have them and use them because they help us and they're pretty common in the community. (Do plenty of research there too if they do have one!)
A joke once or twice, especially if the two characters are very very close, about his dwarfism is okay! Me and my friends joke about mine all the time but quantity control along with a joke in good taste and timing is very important.
The character getting frustrated with his disability is okay too! It happens to me a lot but usually I'll find a solution right after to the thing that frustrated me and that frustration is gone as quick as it came.
If he's having a long conversation or an eye-to-eye conversation with someone that's tall, have them sit down somewhere, get to eye-level (I wouldn't have them lean over to his height though). It really does start to hurt your neck and head after looking up at everyone for so long.
And lastly, I certainly use my height to my advantage in multiple different scenarios. Small hands and small containers or spaces are very compatible with one another. And even though I have to shop in the small teens or kids section for clothes or shoes, I will say certain things are made better for kids (for some reason). But I also know how to hem my own clothes and how to fix them! A lot of people with dwarfism make or modify their own clothes. I can't tell you the amount of times I've gotten discounts at buffets and restaurants because people just assume I'm a child and I'm not gonna protest the discount either so. There are many fun aspects to having dwarfism, I have more fun with it and get more laughs and community out of it than frustration or anything else.
I know there's many more little things that I'm forgetting right now but the dwarfism community could probably add a few things too. Good luck writing!
~ Mod Virus 🌸
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ghostwritermia · 2 days
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Jegulus x reader request?
Where the reader is also a quidditch player and basically she is in hufflepuff/ravenclaw and their team wins, but one of the boys get mad preferably regulus and reader gets upset james comforts her. Basically angst to fluff
P.s u don't have to do it, I hv been writing a poly moonwater for a week and haven't completed yet. Ik writing is hectic
Lots of Love, babe
Hi Hi! Sorry this took so long. I was in a writing slump...
Anyhoo. Here it is, I hope you enjoy!
totally didn't feed my overdramatic personality into this...
No warnings I can think of? Overthinking? Getting lost in your thoughts? Tears?
Poly!Jegulus x ravenclaw!reader
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You were absolutely elated when you found out you had been assigned the captain position.
Sure, you were on a team that normally didn't win, but you were fine with that. You enjoyed the sport, the crowd, the family your team became, the community and environment.
It was the last game of the season and your team had finally won against Slytherin. Earlier in the season you had led your team to victory against Gryffindor. So, with one boyfriend left to beat, you had finally done it today, but apparently it had come with a price to pay.
As you were being crowded and tackled by your team you peeked over your best friend's shoulder, seeing Regulus storming off. And with that, your mood instantly dropped. 
You slipped an easy smile back onto your face as you hugged the rest of your team before slipping off into the changing tent and then back to your common room. 
You understand that Reg wanted to win his last game of the season, you did. But, it was your last game too, and only the second game you had been able to win that season. Shouldn't he be proud of you too?
When you finally made it back to your dorm, you quickly slipped into one of James's shirts (which were huge on you), and a pair of sleep shorts, before curling on in an armchair, pulling your knees to your chest and a blue fuzzy blanket up to your chin.
You didn't know how long you sat there. You also didn't know when James had slipped into the room, not even realizing he was there until he gently wiped tears away from under your eyes with the pads of his thumbs.
You startled, eyes lifting to meet his, to see sorrow swimming in his gaze. “You just gotta give him time, darling. You know how he gets about these things, he’ll come around.” James swiftly picks you up and takes your place in the armchair before resting you back into his lap.
You sighed, curling into his side, resting your forehead in the crook of his neck. “I know, it’s just hard sometimes.” You sniffle into his shirt, and he tugs you tighter against him.
“He will come around darling, I promise.” He says, leaving a gentle kiss to the top of your hair.
You lose track of time as you get comfortable, cuddling into James (stealing all of his warmth), yet he doesn’t complain. You smile into his shoulder as he starts running his fingers through your hair. You playfully bite his shoulder; he tugs on a strand of your hair in reprimand.
You had started to doze off when the door creaked open and James spotted Regulus’s head peek in. He gently tapped your shoulder and when he had gotten your attention, pointed to Regulus.
Your gaze met the stormy gray of Regulus’s before you looked away, finding a loose thread of your blanket far more interesting.
“Mon Amour, I’m so so sorry.” Regulus rushes over to you, crouching down in front of you. “My mind blanked, and I didn’t think before I walked away, and I’m so sorry.” He grabs your hand, pressing a kiss to the back of it before running his thumb along the back of it.
You frown, your eyebrows scrunching and slide out of James’s lap and onto the floor next to Reg. “It’s okay, my love. I understand what it’s like to have loads of pressure on your shoulders, I do too. It can overwhelm you at any moment; sometimes it can even come when we don’t want it too and take control of our actions.” You say wisely. “You had a moment, it happens to the best of us. You may be a wizard, but you are still a human. Bound to make mistakes for the rest of your life,” You remind dramatically, talking with your hands. Regulus laughs, his eyes lighting up again and grabs your hands, holding them stationary.
“I’m glad that you forgive me, mon amour, but you are over dramatic.” Your boyfriend dressed in green states.
You scoff as James slides down from the chair to sit with the two of you on the floor. “I love this make-up session you two are having, but you both are full of crap.” He tugs you both into his sides, one arm wrapped around each of you.
Regulus turns his head, biting James’s hand as you dramatically raise your hand before swatting him on the back of his head.
James quickly pulls his hand away from Regulus, retracting his hold from the two of you and holds the back of his head. “Hey!” You both turn your head and blink at him feigning innocence. “This is not attack James day.” 
He smiles, teeth flashing. You dramatically cover your eyes, faking passing out; falling back from your sitting position and onto your back. “Ah, too bright. Can’t see. James you’re blinding me, can’t you see? Because I sure can’t.”
“Regulus was right. You are so over dramatic.” James rolls his eyes before leaning towards you and pulling your hands away from your eyes and pulling you into him.
“I. Am. Not.” You pout, crossing your arms and leaning out of James’s embrace.
Regulus leans towards you smiling and kisses your forehead. “Yes you are.” He whispers, tackling you to the ground, tickling your sides. “You are dramatic, and I love you for it.” You grin and Regulus gives you a skeptical glance as you turn and smile at James.
Before Reg could blink he was pinned down to the ground; roles reversed. James had his arms pinned to the ground as you straddled his hip, returning the attack of tickles that he had been serving you.
“You lose, Reggie.” You state in a sing-song voice, giggling.
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prettymeoww · 1 day
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They say that a quiet, measured life is boring beyond belief, stability sooner or later always bores you and you deliberately look for something that will excite you to the very bones, shake your consciousness to bright flashes, something new and unbelievable... They say that it's impossible to live without a person who fits into your limits and a little beyond them.
Will says the author of these speeches is a complete asshole.
Will has been searching for so many years for just this life, smooth and enveloping, but all he finds are the mind-squirming events and days that have no count and only an endless string of thoughts.
“When will it all end?”
“Is this what life is supposed to be like?”
He can't remember the last time he slept. Not falling into a dark something along with alcohol, not looking indifferently and simultaneously with horror straight into his hidden fears, but sleeping. Sometimes when you wake up, it's hard to distinguish whether you were in a dream, or catching delusions in reality, still hugging a half-empty bottle of whiskey, which only makes it constantly worse.
Even trying to keep the last bits of living feelings alive by genuinely caring and giving the only possible love to his many dogs draws too much energy. Where does a man come from that doesn't know why he lives? Who longs to find the damn thread that will help him cling and hang on, even if it's on his last breath, but which will help him feel really real and not an “empty” piece of meat.
Graham never knew that, and he doesn't know it after Lecter shows up in his life.
The most ambiguous character in the gray life, as if you look at him and can not understand what feelings you have: interest, dislike or something mixed of all at once?
He brazenly invaded Will's little world, imposed his own order, which could not be called such (but more chaos) and took Graham completely in his power. Dependence on someone... a depressing situation, but the profiler realized it too late, only at the moment when he was too close to his new “friend”.
So much so that he was touching himself too often, and Will could practically feel the damn smirk on his lips. It was as if Hannibal was slowly accustoming his patient to constant contact, and not just with their souls.
What did he need? What could Graham give to a wealthy manipulator who craved control over his entire environment and more?
One day, even Lecter himself couldn't answer that question.
He just wanted to own him. So much so that he put his life on the line.
So much so that he literally put it in Will's hands and told him to do whatever he wanted.
But by this point, the detective had been through too much shit at the hands of the same 'friend', and such 'self-sacrifice' was seen as mock redemption. He'd waited too long for Lecter to accept such a gift. He was tired of waiting for him to hope for a quiet life. It was foolish to believe that he could give it....
Because Will is the most coveted fruit of existence in Lecter's life, in which there can be no safe harbor. Always standing on the edge of the abyss, they will stare into the depths of each other's eyes and think of how they can never unlock their hands again.
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backgroundagent3 · 2 days
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for the character ask, daisy johnson!
Thank you so much for the ask! 💜 I love any excuse to talk about Daisy Johnson.
First impression: I'm trying to squeeze my brain here, but all I remember was trying not to like her at first because I knew se was a double agent for the Rising Tide. It goes without saying I failed miserably about three episodes in.
Impression now: She is my favourite character of all time.
Favorite moment: I really can't choose, but one that comes to mind was the final fight of season 5. I think it's a very underrated fight scene, because it's the end of the world, her dad is dying, she has been recently betrayed and tortured by her friend, and she still goes into battle BY HERSELF against Talbot, and if that wasn't bad enough, when she's about to die a horrible death she realises that the only way she can save the world is if she takes the serum and basically condemns the person she loves most to his death. It's so heartbreaking and poetic, but very cool to watch, and I just love so much it, idk.
Idea for a story: This is angsty but I would love to read something where the events of 5.14 are properly dealt with. May watches the security cameras and goes ballistic on Fitz, and Daisy gets time to grieve and heal. They get Coulson back and he's horrified, and Jemma is so conflicted but she's there for her best friend.
Unpopular opinion: Since apparently I can't stop thinking about season 5, here's some more. I think she actually did a good job of leading the team in season 5b. Especially if you consider that she's been recently tortured, her family doesn't seem to care, she has no experience, and hasn't gotten a good nights sleep in about 5 years. She might be tough, but hello? IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD?? You have to be at least a little bossy if you wanna make it through that. Also if you're gonna be a baby and call her a hard ass maybe you should have thought twice before joining SHIELD.
Favorite relationship: If it's romantic, then Sousa. I love them so so much, they're literally perfect and despite my obvious outrage at season 5, I will forever love the AoS writers for somehow pulling that off. As for platonic relationships, I'd say May. She's the perfect mother figure for her, and I love the parallels between them. I think Daisy has the best relationships in general, but this one is my favourite. Honourable mentions go to Coulson for being the most unhinged dad ever, and to Jemma for being the sweetest friend in the earlier seasons.
Favorite headcanon: before she goes off to space at the end of season 7, she rebuilds Afterlife with the help of Sousa and Kora. I've said this before, but I think they are actually the perfect team to do this. Kora has lived in Afterlife her whole life, she's seen Jiaying help people go through Terrigenesis, and she's been though it herself in a much healthier and safer environment than Daisy. Sousa is reasonable and calm, which are good qualities to have when you're helping someone who's terrified and potentially dangerous. He has experience leading people, which I think would make him a good mentor for the Inhumans. So Kora has the experience, Sousa has the qualities, and in my opinion, Daisy has a nice combination of the two. She has a different and much more horrifying experience of Terrigenesis that people who accidentally go though it can relate to, and she has spent years exploring and controlling her powers, so she knows what the deal is. And she's also a good leader, so where Sousa can help the Inhumans pre-Terrigenesis, she can train them after if that's what they want. Because that's another thing, SHIELD may be funding Afterlife, but they've learnt their lesson and they're not sticking their noses where they shouldn't. They accept new recruits and help train them, but if that's not what the Inhumans want, then SHIELD helps them get settled back into their normal lives. Anyways this got long but it's one of my favourite headcanons, so there you go.
Thank you so much for the ask! Sorry for rambling, but I have a lot to say about Daisy. 🌼💛
Character Asks.
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prince-liest · 2 days
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First off; I LOVE 666!!! 'Multi-series hard kink/edge play pwps (though I'm with you on the 'without plot' being a total misnomer) that are actually in depth psychoanalysis of characters and complicated relationships' is one of my favorite parts of any fandom ( I'm being specific with that because no really for years in a lot of fandoms there's been that one ((or 2)) series that like. Will stick with me forever and make me think about sex/intimacy/myself differently. And your fic is 100% that for HH). I have a lot of squeeing about a lot of it that I hope to be able to coherently comment about at some point but for now!!!!
I was wondering if there was specific purpose behind where certain scenes take place? Like if they're at 'Vox's place' or 'Alastor's place'? because I thought there was a pattern of when Vox is (or ends up) subbing it's at his place (where he would feel safer and therefore more comfortable being vulnerable maybe) and vice versa with when they're at the hotel. But looking back at it to write this maybe I'm making that up? Because they just mostly do take place at somewhere of Vox's? Because I guess Alastor did end up 'going home' at the end a lot. In which case is there specific reasoning behind them not being at Alastor's place as often? (Does he just have less privacy at the hotel lol?) Idk I thought I was getting something, especially with that 'we're at the heart of your territory' line in part 8??? The more I type into this rambly chatty ask the more I think I was just overthinking. But it stood out to me anyway. ANYWAYS. *Finally pauses to breathe*
I really appreciate your series and I love your interpretation of these two weirdos relationship!!! Every snippet and every update I see drives me crazy!!! Thank you so so much for all your work!
Ahaha, I'm so glad to have written that fic for you in this fandom! Someone left a tag on one of the art posts for 666 recently that said "can't wait to see what emotional revelation unsafe kink will lead to this time" and it's. Pretty on point for the series, ehehe. With the likes of Alastor and Vox, it's really hard to dive into any form of intimacy without, like, emotional repurcussions, and that's my favorite thing to write! Thank you so much!
As for your question: To be perfectly honest, there's no specific pattern behind which location I choose for a fic as far as their roles are concerned! They mostly take place preferentially at Vee Tower because Alastor doesn't want to invite all the fuss and bother of Vox's...everything...to the hotel until much later in their reacquaintence. It's much easier to decide that he's done with whatever's going on and to dip out of Vee Tower than it is to have to remove Vox from the hotel (or, well, at least in theory: he portals Vox back into his own bed pretty easily after their night of drinking, haha).
Alastor inviting Vox over for drinks is a sign that he's actually, like, opening up a bit in certain ways by actually inviting him into his living space. Previously they'd mostly only been at the hotel transitionally, and during the second time they slept together, which is also the first time Alastor actually slept with Vox for reasons other than "for the meme", and was looking for a more comfortable, controlled environment to try this new thing in. (And also gave fewer shits about kicking Vox the fuck out without a second thought.)
In a way, the locations follow the general pattern of Alastor's emotional evolution throughtout the series: he's fine with it being at his place at first because he feels more secure and doesn't give a shit about Vox; then he transitions to being more careful and shutting Vox out of his personal space; and now he's slowly gotten to the point where he's comfortable inviting Vox in on occasion.
Alastor's opinion tends to matter more between the two of them as far as location is concerned, so it's mostly down to that, plus occasionally me thinking, "Hm, this episode would be cool to do in blue shark tank mood lighting," hahaha.
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ultimateinferno · 11 months
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I know the Zelda Timeline is hardly the most popular thing out there, but for me, it's always been endlessly fascinating. Everything is the same. It's all different. It's linear. It's cyclical. It branches and twists and comes back together. It disregards its predecessors. It can't let them go. It thrashes against change. It can't stay the same.
Every game is a reboot.
But they're also not.
I think the story of The Legend of Zelda is the epitome of narrative doublethink. In order to truly buy in, you must accept the simultaneous facets that none of the games matter to one another and that they all do. They're the same story. They're absolutely not.
The thing about the timeline, to me, by being both codified and nebulous, is what ties this cow tools of a narrative together. It's a puzzle without a box. It's total fucking nonsense, but so is reality. Things won't ever truly make sense, but what if they did. What if we took it from a new angle and... hmm. No. That won't work
Or maybe...
Ultimately, the Zelda Timeline is quite simply a farcical creative writing prompt. A dare. A challenge. To take these pieces not designed to fit together and give them order. Do the writers themselves care? Absolutely not. I do, though. So fuck it.
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*tries to organize my thoughts*
*remembers i'm not in school and therefore beholden to neither heaven nor hell nor any man's grading system*
*joyously shredding & tossing all my carefully arranged 3x5 mental notecards into the air like so much beige confetti. raising my arms in victory, cheering raucously until i accidentally inhale bits of homemade confetti*
(*coughing up itty bits of paper like a cat evicting a hairball with a firm understanding of tenants' rights*) wait wat happens next
#i marie kondoed my thoughts and *i* feel great. but now my stream-of-consciousness has escaped containment#so many innocent bystanders at stake#every time i try to organize my thoughts i run out of plastic bins and have to make a trip to the container store where i get even more dis#racted so. you can't just hand me THIS brain and NO catalogue OR library classification system#and expect me to single-handedly sort through all this nonsense? bad form but fucking form not in my job description#aNYways. formal education sure did a FUCKING NUMBER on us huh#(a number i measure not in gpa or dollars of student debt.#but in the number of therapy sessions & medical debt it will take to recover.)#seriously folks. our education systems are...innately traumatizing for a huge number of students. and we NEED to address this.#the fact that it is culturally common for adults to have anxiety nightmares about school/exams...even decades later?#that is not cute. it is Alarming.#no one--much less entire generations--should be spending their developmental years in an environment of chronic stress & pressure & strain#and yet that is the reality for millions and millions of pre-teen and teenage and young adult students#this isn't healthy and it serves and empowers NO ONE#...except of course the many exploitative educational & financial & debt-collecting institutions thriving from the current balance of power#and of course it's a nefarious and powerful way to sabotage/erase the middle class#which billionaires and the wealth-inequality creators they finance couldn't possibly have any noteworthy interest in whatsoever#it's not like there's an elite group of people with huge financial incentives to drain/steal resources from the masses...#anyways sorry for going all Conspiracy Theory on you.#obviously the billionaires who control the vast majority of our resources and news and political campaign funding#are not tied to every single itty bitty social issue and i'm a silly billy to imply it#please tell elon musk to ignore this tweet i am so subservient and acquiescent#mr musky u r so good at inheriting slavery-built mining fortunes & buying other people's companies#& building rocket ships & fancy cars that do NOT explode/catch fire & also NOT running billion dollar companies into the ground#mr musky u r so talented genius billionaire playboy with 10 kids and ex-wives who find you creepy af babe u r basically iron man
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notbecauseofvictories · 5 months
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I know my experience is not universal, but I biked 5+ miles to do my errands today and I genuinely think we'd be much happier as a human collective if we increased residential density and switched to largely alternative modes of transportation.
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chasingfictions · 11 months
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buffy the vampire slayer | 1x12 → 5x22
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