#oh ill just draw this because people will wanna see it

[greatestjubilee]

bleh

#hi all. lucy here #i have barely been drawing lately because ive just been unable to #like i feel like i lost my spark. i dunno #i used to draw so much and make so many comics when i was absolute rock bottom mentally #like the funnier i was the worse i was doing #ive been better lately but i truly feel like ive almost sacrificed my ability to draw or create stuff for some more mental stability #i just....i dont know. i feel like i can't do anything i used to do with art. like im not funny or have no ideas or just think stuff like #oh ill just draw this because people will wanna see it #but i gave that up because not even i wanna see it anymore #i hope that i can feel like drawing again one day i just dont know how to get it back. it really feels like ive lost a major part of myself #this is my rambling here just to let you know i am still around just kind of laying low because im drained

[aaagustd]

for the night | min yoongi

title: for the night

pairing: drug lord!min yoongi x waitress!(f)reader

genre/rating: angst, childhood best friends to strangers to friends??, unrequited love, valentine’s day au, smut, romance, 18+

summary: Yoongi lives a dangerous life. So why is he so afraid of you? 

warnings: idk what to say about these two, just a bunch of feelings (spoken & unspoken), light pining, pov switches,  mentions d*ath & grieving,  mentions dr*gs and violence, swearing, bl**d & injuries, p*stol wh*pping/ mild description of t*rture, crooked justice systems (it’s the wild wild west out there), mentions a robbery & a**ault (nothing involving the main story), mentions illnesses & health related topics, alcohol/drinking but no intoxication unless you count staring at yoongi for too long, black hair with the undercut yoongi, chains, rings, TATTOOS…. oh my !!!, yoongi has a gl*ck (a piece, that iron… whatever you wanna call it), everybody’s shipping these two but they’re just…yeah, eye f*cking from both parties, explicit content, the friend version of kiss & makeup??, dry h*mping, Dom!yoongi, yoongi getting head is a warning, protected s*x, gagging/deep throating, throat/face f*cking, hair pulling, crying, i’m sure yoongi has Sir kink hiding in there somewhere, manhandling, face slapping, yoongi’s fingers down your throat, missionary with your leg over yoongi’s shoulder, big d*ck!yoongi, his jewelry stays on bc why would it not?, cl*t stimulation, teasing, spitting, org*sm control, c*m shots, body worship, p*ssy eating, throat grabbing, i think that's all...

wc: 11.6k

release date: february 16, 2024; 10:15pm est

note: sorry i took forever. this is my first oneshot in a while so i apologize for mistakes. i'm just finding my footing in this writing thing again. thanks to @itaeewon for my banner and @cafekitsune who makes these pretty dividers. please follow both of them for cool graphics. anyway, happy late valentine's day. i love you guys.

masterlist | playlist | ao3 version

“Enjoy the rest of your night… and be safe!”

As you wave goodbye to the last lovely couple dining at your restaurant tonight, you express how thrilled you are of their return. 

You stand in front of your father’s little restaurant and watch the lovebirds bundle up as they make their way to their vehicle, embracing each other and protecting themselves from the same frigid temperatures that threatened to ruin their Valentine’s day plans.

It’s nights like these that make the sacrifice of putting your nursing career on hold well worth it. This neighborhood doesn’t have a lot to offer as far as entertainment goes, so keeping this place in business is your top priority. This is your home, and the people you love put their all into this establishment. 

You’ll make sure it thrives and continues to be a source of comfort to the community.

You’re excited to tell your father about tonight’s turn out. You know he will be pleased. It’s been busy all day with dine-ins and take outs; everyone looking for the perfect date night meal. 

“The food is made with love,” is what your dad always says.

He always looks forward to this time of year, and he’s always talked about seeing you sitting in one of his booths with a special someone of your own some day. 

You only nod when he brings up your dating life; sometimes his love for you blinds him from reality. You’ve never brought anyone home, or ever mentioned being involved with someone to him. Even if you came out and said it, he’d never believe you’re the problem.

A chilly breeze in the mid-February air snaps you out of your thoughts—so as soon as the couple’s sedan departs from the parking lot—you slip back inside. 

The warmth instantly envelopes your trembling figure, and draws a small exhale from your lips.

Looking at your watch, you notice that it’s almost midnight. You switch the sign from open to close, but don’t bother locking the door because there’s one more visitor that should be arriving shortly.

You keep that in mind as you begin to clean the front of the house. 

One by one, your father’s employees complete their duties in a haste, then clock out so they can go home to whoever is waiting for them. Their eagerness only brings a smile to your face.

As you’re sanitizing a table, you catch a glimpse of one of the waitresses dashing towards the door.

“Well, see you tomorrow, Kaci!”

She halts, then turns around to say her goodbyes—and to gossip. 

“Night, boss lady,” she chirps.

Why she calls you “boss lady” is a mystery to you; your dad only left you in charge, but you’re just a manager. You still get on the floor and serve tables like everyone else.

You’re curious about the bit of mischief hidden in her tone. It’s not long before she reveals her true intentions.

“Did he stop by yet?”

And of course…she’s talking about Yoongi.

Usually, someone stops by on his behalf to collect the rent. His family allows your father and a few others to occupy the buildings on this lot for business. Payment is always to be paid in cash, so you make sure you visit the bank the morning of collections. 

Your family has had a close relationship with the Mins for years, so they’ve been working with you while your father recovers.

You met Yoongi right in this restaurant at the young age of four, and from there, your friendship blossomed. You were inseparable throughout grade school, but senior year is when everything shifted.

It had to be the first time you both realized that you were on different paths after graduation. While you prepped for college, he was being introduced to the hustle that built his family’s empire.

If that didn’t tear a rift in your relationship, the underlying tension and unspoken feelings surely did. People used to always say at least one of you would eventually want something different, and you used to always laugh at them…until it became a fact.

You’ve always wondered if he ever felt the same as you did—or if he ever thought about exploring something more.

Unfortunately, you’ll never know what he was feeling. After graduation, he shut you out and never looked back. That was so long ago, though. You’ve grown, and the pain of losing someone you cared about eventually went away.

…So you thought.

Being home again brings back so many memories and forgotten feelings. Things you wish you still had, and things you wish you could have had. After experiencing so much throughout college, and learning more about yourself, you’d kill to go back in time so you can handle things differently. 

You can’t help but think your friendship was torn apart by nothing more than a curious mind and raging hormones.

Yoongi’s so different now, though. However, you still see glimpses of the boy who would sneak into your window just to watch reruns of 90s cartoons with you. You smile just thinking about all the fun times you’ve shared, and all the trouble you got into.

“Look at you getting wet just thinking about him! I knew it. You’re whipped!”

“Can you keep your damn voice down,” you hiss. “Last thing I need is gossip right now.”

You’re so fed up with her teasing. If you two hadn’t just clicked when you took over the restaurant, you’d probably just kick her ass out in the cold.

“And, no. He has not. So, you can leave now, ma’am.”

“Oh, for sure,” she sighs dramatically. “Hell only knows what you two do when you are alone.”

Your jaw drops. 

Sometimes this bond you share is a blessing; but other times, it’s a curse.

Kaci’s a sweetheart, but her mouth… Well, let’s just say these comments are normal for her. 

And just like your father, she loves to play Cupid. No wonder he hired her.

“Just get your ass out of here.”

You can barely keep your laugh from bursting through your lips as you send a rag flying towards her. She dodges it, then proceeds to give you a middle finger. She has another shady comment ready to roll off the tip of her tongue, but then she glances out of the glass door and smirks instead. 

You scoff. “Bitch, what is it now?”

Kaci then shakes her head. 

“Nothing, babe. I’m out,” she winks. Kaci then points towards the parking lot and whispers, “Daddy’s here.”

“Huh? What are you talking about—”

Crawling into one of the booths, you partially open the blinds with your fingers and peek out of the window.

About seven sets of headlights stare back at you, all belonging to vehicles that are as dark as the midnight hour. A BMW sits in the center, blacked out with tinted windows and black custom rims. However, you don’t need a look inside to know who it is. No one else would pull up like they own the lot.

All the businesses are closed, which means these aren’t customers. It’s the boss.

Your heart rate builds up when the door opens and his sneakers touch the concrete. He stands there for a moment fixing his jacket and discreetly observing his surroundings. 

Your eyes follow his movements. You can only hear the bass from his music and the noises coming from your throat as you try to gulp down the saliva building up in your mouth. 

All you needed to see was the top of his head to confirm what you already knew. 

Yoongi’s here, and he’s the one coming to collect payment tonight.

You don’t know why your heart is about to pound out of your chest like you’re hexed by some teenage crush. Maybe you are still hung up on him a little bit. You can’t deny how attractive he still is. He definitely wears age well.

The dark hair suits him perfectly. You can remember the horror stories about the color experiments gone wrong when you were teenagers. It’s a surprise that it’s still luscious and healthy as it is.

However, that isn’t the only thing that has changed in his appearance.

They’re hard to spot under his jacket, but his torso, back, and arms are covered in tattoos. You only know about this because another waitress working here loves to share the story of how she was on her knees in a bathroom giving a shirtless Yoongi a blowjob. 

You would never admit jealousy, but damn; that lucky bitch.

Yoongi starts to make his way across the parking lot, pushing back his hair with his ringed-fingers to grant better vision out of his peripherals. You know he’s always watching his back; he can never be too careful when he’s making moves.

His haircut allows you to get a glimpse of the ink crawling up his neck, disappearing behind his ear. His earring dangles in the wind as he strides in your direction.

Each step is confident and dominant;  his aura dark and mysterious. 

A man who is about his business, it’s no shock that heads turn when he steps into the room. He’s reserved, but not afraid to enforce his authority when he deems necessary. You heard stories, and crossing Yoongi is considered a death wish. 

He’s like the hot badass described in movies or books, but he actually is that guy. Handsome, street-wise, tattoos and scars; paired with money, jewelry, and you’d be stupid to think he isn’t packing. 

You can smell the power and Dior emitting from his body all the way from where you are. 

Each step he takes towards the entrance of the restaurant gives you a better view without being noticed. It’s a sin how good he looks and he’s just wearing a simple outfit with some sneakers. You have no business feeling these kinds of things, but it’s impossible to not.

“Can he just bend us over already?”

You hear Kaci whisper the same words you were just thinking. But she can’t know that, so you swat her again for good measure.

“Fine…I’m leaving,” she whines, walking to the door.

You back out of the booth and move over to the host stand so you can roll silverware and act like you weren’t watching him.

Kaci opens the door just as he’s about to reach for the handle, and of course, she gives him a warm welcome.

“Hi, Yoongi,” she beams. You roll your eyes the second you hear that annoying high-pitched voice she uses when she’s being coy.

“Hey, can you hang back for a bit? It won’t be long.”

“Yeah, sure. Everything okay?”

The look he gives her sends your radar up, so you set down the utensils in your hand and join them in the lobby.

“Hey,” you greet him when he notices you. “What’s going on?”

Yoongi sighs before he answers, shaking his head as he gathers his words.

“You know the alterations shop over there?” 

His head nods in the direction of the Leonard’s shop a few stores down. Both of you nod because they take lunch breaks here everyday.

“Somebody hit them up about an hour ago. Left their daughter in bad shape before they stripped the registers,” he informs.

“Are you serious? That’s awful.”

“Yeah, they’re good people. Who would do something that disgusting?” Kaci asks.

Yoongi only shrugs. “Don’t know, but as soon as I find out…”

He doesn’t even need to continue. It’ll be bad; probably worse than you can imagine. One thing the Min’s don’t tolerate is disrespect. You mess with one of their people, you get handled. In this case, you can’t even feel bad for the bastard. That family doesn’t bother anyone. It’s a shame they were targeted.

“Anyway, I don’t want either of you lingering around here at night anymore. Stick together during opening and closing until we catch this motherfucker understand?”

“Yeah, got it,” you reply, and Kaci also agrees.

“Sure, not a problem.”

With everyone on the same page, you make a note in your mind to update the security system in the restaurant and think of some safety tips for employees. No one can ever be too careful, especially after what just occurred so close to home.

“And Kaci?” he calls, just as she’s getting ready to depart. 

“Yeah?”

“Don’t walk home. Your pepper spray is expired. Ask one of the guys to drive you.”

“Is Hoseok out there?” 

You and Yoongi share a look. He’s probably wondering what it’s about, but then again, who doesn’t know they’re fucking?

“Yeah…he is—”

“Kay, bye!”

Before the door slams in your face, you call out to her. 

“Text me when you’re home!... Or when you’re able to use your hands.”

Yoongi chuckles as the both of you watch her dash across the lot. You aren’t sure how she’s able to spot the right SUV, but she does within seconds.

“This has been going on for a while, huh?” Yoongi inquires.

“Mhm. Fight, fuck, repeat.”

After a moment goes by, you realize you forgot to bring the money you owe Yoongi. You snap your fingers when you remember why he’s there in the first place.

“Oh, yeah. Come on, it’s back here,” you tell him.

Yoongi follows you toward the back of the restaurant until you reach the small manager’s office tucked in a corner of the kitchen. While you dig in your apron for the key, Yoongi checks in with you to see how everything’s going.

“How’s your dad?”

You pause to look at him and answer with a proud smile. Your father’s been working really hard on his road to recovery; it’s nice to talk about his accomplishments without someone looking at you with pity, which Yoongi never does.

“He’s been doing better. Lots of physical therapy, but he walked on his own yesterday.”

With a nod, Yoongi’s expression softens.  “That’s the shit I like to hear.”

“Me too.”

Once you find the keys, you unlock the door and the both of you step inside the dark room.

“Thanks,” you whisper when he flips the lightswitch for you. 

You can feel him watching you as you walk around the desk, and when you squat down to open the safe underneath, you hear his footsteps approaching. 

You start entering the combination while he whistles and looks around your office. 

You’re curious about what he’s looking at, but right now you can't even take a peek without him noticing. Instead, you focus on gathering the cash you owe him for last month and this month while he’s busy snooping around.

After a while, you figure he’s found something interesting because the room becomes quiet. You grab the stack you set aside and close the safe, making sure it’s locked before you do anything else.

“So how was your day?”

Yoongi’s deep voice tears a giant rift in the silence, startling you and causing you to bump your head on the edge of the desk. Thankfully, his back is turned and he didn’t hear the small thud because you’d be beyond embarrassed.

“It was okay,” you reply as you regain your footing. 

Yoongi turns in your direction when he hears your words become clearer, indicating you’re no longer digging around in the safe. He meets you halfway and you extend your hand with the stack of money resting between your fingers. 

“This is all of it.”

Yoongi looks at the stack before he responds. Most of the time, it’s so hard to know what he’s thinking because his expression is always so stoic.

“Just okay?” he quizzes. 

“Yeah, pretty much. It was busy so I was stuck in autopilot most of the day.”

He still hasn’t made a move to accept the money. You feel kind of awkward being so close to him as is, and his lack of response makes you feel even more anxious. 

Finally, he speaks. “Do you even have this to give me?”

“Yeah, we’re good. Please, take it.”

You gesture for him to take the money, and he reaches for it, making you believe he’s going to grab it.

“It’s all here. If you want me to count it, I—”

“Don’t worry about it,” he insists.

“What do you mean?”

“Exactly what I said,” he shrugs.

“Yoongi, no. We haven’t paid in a month. My dad would already be mad at me for being behind.”

“Does he have to know?” The look Yoongi gives you reminds you of all the times he’s talked you into doing something wild. He’d always take the blame if you got caught, but the thrill always made getting grounded irrelevant to you. “Keep it. We’re good until he gets back, okay?”

“Yoongi, I can’t.”

“You can’t?”

“I won’t,” you declare confidently.

“So you’re arguing with me?”

Your eyes widen, realizing that he wasn’t giving you an option.

“I-I’m sorry. I was just—”

“Don’t worry about it, alright? Just keep doing what you’re doing. I only hear good things about this place,” he concludes.

“Okay, ok. Thanks, Yoongi.”

“Don’t mention it.”

As you’re returning the money to the safe, Yoongi brings something to your attention.

“I don’t see your car outside.”

“Ah, shit. It needed to be serviced. I was supposed to pick it up on my lunch, but I forgot.”

After visiting the bank this morning, you dropped your vehicle off at the dealership for maintenance, but the breakfast rush swarmed in as soon as you arrived at work. By the time you thought about picking it up, it was well after business hours.

“Um, do you mind—”

“Wanna ride?” Yoongi offers.

“Please.” Relieved, you exhale a needed sigh. “If it’s not an inconvenience.”

“Not at all, love.”

You quickly grab your purse and switch off the light in your office, ignoring that feeling you got from the little pet name. 

Yoongi leads the way this time. As you’re following him through the restaurant, you’re sure to double check everything before you leave. Even Yoongi turns to ask you if you’ve secured everything.

“Good?”

“Yeah, everything’s turned off and we’re locked up tight.”

“Cool.”

Walking into the dining area, you give everything a quick once-over before following Yoongi to the exit. Everything looks tidy and neat how you like it so you step out into the cold night with your chauffeur. 

He waits with you while you lock the front doors, looking around for any curious eyes. After you’ve finished turning the lock and key, you give the handle a tug to make sure it doesn’t open.

Growing up in this neighborhood will teach you a thing or two about being cautious and aware of your surroundings.

“It’s freezing tonight,” you comment.

Sometimes you like to make small talk with Yoongi, see where the conversation goes. Depending on the mood he’s in, he’ll either have one sentence responses or he’ll engage in light conversation.

You don’t mention the past much. It seems like pretending it never happened is easier for both of you. However, sometimes you have an impulse to bring up the subject, or at least try to mend what’s broken. 

If that’s possible.

“Cold? This is perfect weather.”

You roll your eyes. He’s definitely fucking with you.

“Oh, whatever. You know it’s freezing out here.”

You don’t care how ridiculous you look speeding towards his car. You’re shivering and Yoongi takes forever to unlock the door.

You shuffle from foot to foot, wiggling to build up some body heat. You can hear the fabric of your jeans rubbing together due to the friction.

“You know it’s already unlocked, right?”

Oh.

You climb inside and relief washes over you. The heat is blowing warm and strong, making the leather seats even more comfortable. The seat warmers keep your butt cozy, and the vents are aiming towards your upper body. It’s perfect; you could fall asleep right here.

When Yoongi gets in the driver seat, your head lolls in his direction.

“Thank you.”

“For?” he asks.

“Your car feels like heaven right now.”

Yoongi scoffs softly.

“It isn’t always this warm. Trust me,” he replies.

“Well regardless, thanks. I appreciate it.”

“Not a problem, love.”

Fuck.

Yoongi’s engine revs as he pulls out of the parking lot. A thought comes into your mind as the vibrations travel up your body.

“Does it ever make your balls tingle?”

He coughs, clearing his throat while checking to see if he heard right.

“Uh, what?”

“The car,” you elaborate. “When you’re driving it…You don’t feel anything?”

Honestly, you’re just chatting to keep yourself from falling asleep. You don’t even expect him to answer as you stare out of the window, watching the SUVs fade in the distance.

“I guess I never really thought about it,” he responds.

You nod, vibing to the music. He’s turned the volume down since you’ve joined him, so you can actually hear each other speak.

“Hm. Sure does make your pussy tingle.”

You don’t think he heard that part. It was barely a whisper. If he did, he chose to ignore it.

“You alright?”

“Yup,” you answer. “Just ready to unwind.”

“Any plans tonight?”

You sit up in your seat, and turn to him.

“You bet.”

Yoongi laughs. “Oh, yeah?”

“I have a date with my bed, and I’m gonna let my blanket top me.”

“Gotcha. So you’re locked down, huh?”

“I wouldn’t say that.”

“Well, it sure sounds like it. I never see you having any fun.”

You give him a look. 

“Well, look who’s talking. Besides, you know I’m dealing with a lot right now.”

“Fair enough, but you’re still allowed to do something for yourself for a change. Some of us don’t have that privilege,” he replies.

“I think everyone has the privilege to do something for themselves. You just have to be selfish enough to go for it, I guess.”

“That is true.”

Yoongi then turns the music up a few notches. You already know what that means. He’s over conversation and wants to get lost in his thoughts. 

As you cruise through the streets, people may look on the surface and think this is some young bachelor taking his car for a late night drive—maybe heading to one of the city’s hot spots. 

But Yoongi is all work, and no play. If it’s not about moving product, it’s placed on the backburner.

You can relate, but tonight you’re switching it up. Self care is calling your name and you aren’t hanging up this time.

“What happened to the garden?”

You’re pulled from your thoughts by Yoongi’s voice. 

As he pulls up to the curve in front of your childhood home, he can’t stop himself from teasing you about your dying plants. You really tried your best with them, but unfortunately, you weren’t gifted with nurturing hands.

“You’re not funny,” you mutter, acting ignorant.

You know you’ve destroyed your dad’s flower bed, but he doesn’t have to make fun of you.

“I’m just saying, shouldn't you cover them?”

“I forgot!”

“You always do,” he mumbles.

You giggle as you’re opening the door; finally having a carefree conversation with your old friend again feels nice. As soon as you step out into the elements again, the winter air nips at your cheeks and you know you’ll be trembling by the time you get to your doorstep.

“Well, thanks for the ride.”

Yoongi just nods and tells you that he’d do it anytime you needed him to.

As you stand outside of the car, you start to get that feeling in your gut. That urge you know you shouldn’t have, but the temptation is stronger than ever.

Yoongi tilts his head, wondering why you’re standing in the cold. You’re frozen, silently debating on what you should do.

Ultimately, you go for it, knowing the risk you’re taking without being prepared for the aftermath. 

You’re even sure why you’re asking, or where you expect things to go. But tonight made you realize something. You miss having a best friend. 

Your best friend.

“Hey, it's late. You wanna come inside?... If you don’t have any plans.”

Regret washes over you as soon as the words leave your mouth. You weren’t ready, neither was he. You curse yourself for rushing it. The silence goes on for ages, but you’re so numb, the cold doesn’t faze you.

Finally, he gives you an answer. “You know I can’t do that.”

Well, now you know you’re the only one still holding on. By can’t, he means he won’t. 

Nodding, you lie and pretend that you understand where he’s coming from. “Yeah, I get it. Sorry about that.”

You were sure he’d be more open now that time has passed. However, you’re still stuck where you left off. He still won’t hear you out.

“There’s no need,” he assures. 

Still, you feel guilty. Selfish.

Foolish.

“Well look, I'll see you around, yeah?” He checks his phone and tosses it on the passenger seat. "I have to go deal with something."

“Okay, thanks again for the ride. Stay safe.”

You try not to look disappointed, but it’s probably no good. You’re sure he hears it in your voice. Or maybe you sound more tired than anything. You are exhausted. Maybe it’s your restless mind that's causing you to get ahead of yourself and open old wounds. It’s best you go inside before you can dig yourself a bigger hole. 

“You'll call me if you need me, right?”

If you need him… 

You always need him. He’s your rock. Well, probably not anymore. How do you learn to forget someone who’s always been there for you?

You swallow the bitterness coating your tongue before you reply. You’ll get over it. You always do. 

Just not right now.

“Yeah, I’ve tried that already. Goodnight, Yoongi.”

You shut his car door and retreat to the safety of your home. You’re unsure if he says it back or not. You walk away before he can respond. 

Everything in your sight becomes blurry as your vision is blocked by a wave of pending tears. You urgently open your front door in case he’s following you. 

A part of you wishes that he did. 

But the longer you stand there, back pressed against your front door, secluded from the same world you’ve just finished servicing—you realize that the chances of that happening are too slim to hold onto. 

Minutes go by, and you start calming down. You find your strength again, and you realize that your vulnerability made you panic. You got too comfortable, and that’s your fault. 

Tonight will just be another solo night; nothing you aren’t used to. 

You wipe your face and rid yourself of all the negative energy. Tomorrow you’ll be fine and the blow of rejection will start to fade away. Shaking your head, you clear your mind and start taking off your clothes.

You put it in your mind that you won’t hold this against Yoongi, and whenever he’s ready to talk—if ever—you’ll tell your side of the story if he wants to hear it.

Until then, you’ll just focus on you because he was right about one thing.

You should treat yourself; you deserve it.

“Get your sorry ass up.”

Yoongi stares at his hand as he walks away from the battered man lying on the ground. His knuckles are bruised and covered in the thief’s blood. The sight would bring shame to his father. He shouldn’t be out here behaving like a street thug when he’s got power moves to make.

But when he found out there was danger lurking so close to you, he had to deliver the message himself. He’s sure it was heard loud and clear.

Possibilities played through his mind with every blow that rained down on the guy. What if it was your father’s restaurant that had been hit up? What if you had been inside?

He’s furious, enraged; but mostly at himself for how he keeps letting you down. You wanted to forgive him tonight, put everything that happened behind you and maybe try again. But what did he do?

He ruined it.

He always figured that he would, but it’s what you needed to hear. He’s not a good guy or some bad boy you can turn good. Yoongi’s in this too deep to be pulled out. There’s no way he could ever look your father in the eye and tell him that he’s put your life in danger. 

That’s why he refuses to address those feelings he has for you. He’d either end up breaking your heart, or getting you into a nasty situation.

If the wrong person were to know that he has a thing for you, you’d become a weapon for an opp to use against him. Yoongi’s respected by many, but there are some who want everything he has; you’d be added to the top of that list if they knew he’d died for you. 

He can’t lose what his family’s worked hard for, but he can’t lose you either. 

There’s only two options if that line’s ever crossed. Either you’re with him, and you’ll have to step into his world; or you’re not; and the streets deem you fair game. 

The latter infuriates him. He’d kill anyone who would ever think of laying a finger on you. That’s why he has to make examples out of motherfuckers like the one behind him.

“You need to find you something safe to do, my friend.”

Yoongi turns around just as the man rises to his feet, staggering and weak from the beating he’s received. One of his arms cradles his torso while the other wipes blood from his lips. He’d receive pity from anyone without the context, but if they knew what he did to that seamstress—they’d be wondering why he’s still alive.

This is far less than what this scum deserves. His apologies fall on deaf ears. Yoongi’s men don’t give a shit about his apology, and neither does he.

“I’m so sorry. I…I didn’t know this was your block too. I was just—”

Yoongi pulls out his glock and fires a shot near the guy’s foot, barely missing him. He doesn’t recall asking him to speak.

“You better assume every block is mine, motherfucker. I own this fucking city. Have you forgotten?”

“I—”

Another shot nearly blows his head off because once again, Yoongi never asked him to talk.

“Who told you to open your mouth?...” he seethes. “Speak again and I won’t miss.”

The man nods, lifting his shaky hands as a surrender. 

Yoongi’s jaw clenches as he contemplates his next move. A few minutes ago, he was set on ending him right in this spot, but after thinking about you he’s calmed down a lot. 

That’s the only reason this man’s life will be spared. His mind is somewhere else now; all he can think about is his own mistakes. This guy’s learned his lesson; no need to waste anymore of his time here.

“Look, don’t ever put me in this situation again. Am I clear?”

“Yes, Sir. I won’t. I promise.”

Yoongi knocks the guy out cold with his gun. He looks over at the officer who was escorting the guy to jail and gives him a nod, giving him the clear to take him in. 

“This was a citizen’s arrest,” he insists, handing the cop a wad of cash.

“You got that.”

He dismisses his men, and goes to have a cigarette while he thinks.

After the criminal is placed in the back of the squad car, the cop rejoins Yoongi as he sits on the hood of his vehicle, having a smoke before he goes on with his night.

“Never thought I’d see you get dirty, especially tonight.”

Yoongi scoffs. “Yeah, me either.”

Yoongi looks at his personal phone, looking to see if you’ve texted him, or called. He doesn’t know why he’s checking. He shouldn’t expect you to reach out after how he left you tonight. It’d be a miracle if you ever wanted to see him again.

“It’s not too late, you know.”

“The fuck are you talking about, Shark?”

Shark is one of his longtime friends. He comes from a long line of crooked cops. 

He’s been present through the ups and downs of his friendship with you. Shark’s always been rooting on your side, always telling him to reach out when you left for college.

Yoongi has never taken his advice, though.

“I’m just saying. Maybe you should just call her,” he explains.

“Who?”

“You want me to say her name out here?”

Yoongi shakes his head. “Absolutely not.”

Both of them share a laugh at Yoongi’s reaction, but then silence falls over the night. 

Now that the adrenaline is wearing off, Yoongi’s hands are beginning to throb with pain. He tries focusing on something other than that awful feeling, but he can only think about you.

Why couldn’t he just hear you out? That would have been fair. He’s regretting more and more as time goes by, wondering if the opportunity has slipped away.

He notices the way you look at him, the way you perk up when you see him. He knows there are a lot of unspoken words because honestly, he’s always had deeper feelings for you. It was way before you realized you like him as well. He bottled that shit up throughout high school, and when he had the chance to tell you how he felt, he fumbled.

You even gave him a second chance to come clean, and he still couldn’t get it together.

“Seriously, what happened tonight? I see it all over your face.”

Yoongi sighs. “I took her home, and she invited me inside.”

“And you said no? Dude, no way.”

Yoongi looks over and finds his friend’s face stuck in a grimace. He feels shame creeping up his neck, so he quickly shifts his focus somewhere else. 

“What was I supposed to say? You know I can’t let anyone see me walking in her place,” he argues.

“You could have invited her to yours, explained things a bit more. I’m sure she’s capable of making decisions for herself.”

Yoongi’s at a crossroads, but every way he turns leaves him with doubt. It’s like he’s damn regardless. 

“What if it doesn’t change her mind? What should I tell her dad, huh?” Yoongi rants. “He asked me to keep her safe, man.”

“And what do you think he meant by that?”

Shark looks at his watch and turns to Yoongi as he prepares to leave. 

“Look, my shift ends soon, so I gotta go. But I think you know as well as I do that you have the old man’s blessings. Just stop overthinking it. You’ll screw yourself.”

With that, Shark walks to his vehicle, and puts it in drive.Before he pulls from underneath the overpass, he rolls his window down and yells out.

“It’ll be alright, brother. Trust me!”

When Shark leaves, he switches cars with his right hand, not wanting to double back to your part of town in the same ride. As he starts driving away from the secluded area, he thinks back on how tonight has gone so far. That’s when something you said hits him…and it hits him hard.

“You said you needed me,” he whispers.

All day you’ve been surrounded by people, loving each other; only to go home to an empty house. You just wanted some company, a distraction. You wanted a friend.

It’s then he realizes that he’s hurt your feelings more than a little. You weren’t hung up on a crush you had over five years ago. He’s so stupid. How did his brain not perceive what you said as an invitation to hang out?

Just like you used to.

Yoongi does a U-turn and heads straight for your house. He has no idea what you’ll say to him, or if you’ll speak to him at all. But he needs you to know one thing; he gets it now. And he won’t ever let you down again.

No matter how many times you watch it, the horror classic Thirteen Ghosts never gets old. Your dad laughs whenever you call it your comfort flick, but he’s also not a horror fan so he just wouldn’t understand. 

That bath worked more magic than you could ever imagine. It’s super late, and you should be in bed, but you’ve been thinking about the bottle of wine you bought the other day since earlier.

You aren’t really a drinker, but the bottle was cute. You figured tonight would be the perfect chance to eat some snacks, watch a movie, and give it a try. But as soon as the glass touches your lips, your doorbell rings. 

You’re not expecting anyone this late. When you don’t answer, they pound on the door, startling you. Wine spills all over your hands. Quickly, you use your shirt to dry them off before making a bigger mess. You drink what’s left in the glass in one gulp before checking your Ring camera, letting out a gasp when you discover who’s standing at your doorstep.

“Yoongi?” you whisper.

Placing your phone and empty glass on the coffee table, you go to see what he wants. If you’re honest, you’re a bit worried. Did someone break into the restaurant? 

Your dad would be devastated. 

Without a second thought, you open the door, and interrogate Yoongi before he can even open his mouth.

“Is everything okay? Did something happen to my dad’s—”

“Oh, fuck. No! No, that’s not why I’m here,” he interrupts. 

You breathe a sigh of relief, clutching your chest as the panic slowly leaves your body. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.”

“No, it’s okay. What’s up? Are you okay?”

Now that you’re not shaken with worry, you notice how disheveled he looks. His hair is messy; his expression seems anxious, his knuckles bruised.

“Were you fighting?” you quiz.

“Huh?” Yoongi looks confused but then suddenly seems to remember his injury. “Oh, this is nothing. I’m good. I just came to uhh… To see you.”

Your eyebrow raises curiously. “To see me?”

“Yeah,” he confirms. 

“Okay, well… that’s nice of you, but I was planning on going to bed in a bit. I have to get up early.”

You aren’t sure why he’s acting weird. Is he in trouble? Surely, he’d tell you if he was. If so, why would he come here?

“Um, okay. Sorry,” he answers.

You tell him goodnight and attempt to shut the door, but Yoongi lodges his arm into the opening.

“What are you doing—”

“I’m listening.”

“What?”

You open the door once again, fully believing this man has lost his mind. It’s freezing out there, and he’s just standing there babbling.

“I said I’m listening,” he repeats. “Tell me.”

“Tell you what, Yoongi?”

You’ve never been more confused. First, he drops you off and hauls ass across town. Now he’s pacing at your doorstep, fumbling all over his words. Something’s going on.

“You wanted to talk, but I ghosted you, remember?”

Oh. So he remembers that.

“That’s water under the bridge. Just forget it,” you insist.

“So now I’m water under the bridge?”

“What?! No! That’s not what I said.”

“Well, explain,” he pleads. “Or just tell me it’s too late.”

“Yoongi…”

“I just wanna be friends again, but this haunts me. If you have feelings for me, I can’t—”

“I don’t,” you admit.

This is the first time Yoongi has stood completely still since he got here. He stares at you with wide eyes, not uttering a single word. 

It took you a long time to understand your feelings for Yoongi. You had to experience a few unnecessary hook ups and break ups to realize you weren’t in love. You just wanted to fuck him like everyone else.

Who knows where things would have gone? But it would have been nice to let things happen naturally than to bottle up feelings.

You open the door again, and step to the side. 

“Come in. It’s cold.”

This time he doesn’t reject your invitation. 

Yoongi follows you into your living room, looking around and probably reminiscing over the past. Nothing’s really changed other than the furniture. However, the memories of the days you two used to run around while your mom scolded you for messing up the floors are still present.

You point to the couch and offer him a seat while you stand there gathering your words.

“You can sit here.”

“Thanks,” he replies.

Yoongi sits and does that thing he does with his hands when he’s nervous. His fingers intertwine and he just watches his thumbs chase each other in a loop. He used to do it all the time whenever he’d stay too late at your house and his dad would come looking for him.

Your parents always were able to calm Mr. Min down before he could reprimand Yoongi. It took him a while but he finally understood that you and his son were best friends, and your place was Yoongi’s second home.

There are so many evenings he’d miss basketball practice to hold you while you cried after your mom died. Yoongi never left your side. Even when you were unrightfully resentful and angry with him for still having his mom in his life; he understood every stage of your grief.

So no, he’s not just water under the bridge to you. He could never be. He may be wrong for shutting you out, but everyone has their breaking point. 

“I wanted to tell you that I was in love with you. That I wanted you to go with me to college,” you confess.

Yoongi’s jaw nearly hits the floor. You can tell he’s shocked because he starts tripping over his words.

“I-I… I didn’t know that. I’m sorry. You—”

“...Was confused,” you add. 

You can’t help but laugh at yourself and at the situation. All this time you’ve been scared to rip the bandaid off, and the wound’s already healed.

“I didn’t have anyone to talk with about dating and stuff; not from a young woman’s perspective, at least. I would watch rom-coms and thought I had butterflies whenever I saw you. Whole time…”

You fold your arms and lean against the wall, watching the television with a blank stare. Already, it feels like a weight is being lifted off your shoulders. So much tension has built up over time, so many unspoken words and unresolved feelings that it’s a relief to get it all out.

“...My pussy was throbbing.”

Yoongi picks his mouth up off the floor, and straightens in his seat. Once again, he’s caught off guard.

“Huh-What?”

You snort. “I was horny, curious… I just wanted you to bend me over and deflower me.”

“Deflower you? The fuck?”

Yoongi’s laughter erupts from his chest, lightening the vibes in the room. It’s nice to hear him laugh, like genuinely grin and reveal his cute smile. You didn’t realize how much you missed seeing the image until it’s presented to you at that moment.

“Well, it’s true!”

“I see you are still an over-sharer,” Yoongi chuckles.

“And you’re still stubborn.”

Both of you look at each, shaking your heads and sharing a fond smile. You can tell this has been weighing on him as much as it did you. He’s regretful of how he handled the situation, and you’re sorry for staying away so long.

You should have tried harder. Yoongi always did whenever it got tough. 

Regardless, it’s in the past. It’s time to move on.

You walk across the room with your arms open, inviting your friend into an embrace.

“Seriously? No way,” he grimaces, trying to get up before you can close him in.

Unfortunately, he’s not fast enough.

“You know you want to. Come here.”

Wrapping your arms around Yoongi, you giggle when he acts like he’s all tense. He always pretends he doesn’t want to hug you at first, but then, he gives in.

“Fuck it,” he groans, pulling you closer.

You melt in his arm almost immediately. You don’t even care if you slide to the floor. All of your weight rests on him, but he still holds you up while complaining about you smothering him.

“I wish I could breathe,” he gripes.

“Fine…”

Yoongi expects you to back away; but instead, you climb on his lap.

“What are you doing?” 

You shrug. “My bad. I thought we were cool.”

Maybe you did move a little too quickly, but it’s nothing you haven’t done hundreds of times. You’ve shared beds, seen each other naked… accidentally found each other’s Pornhub accounts. You were just acting on instinct. 

You’re about to stand, but Yoongi stops you. “We are, but aren’t you mad at me?... From earlier?”

“A little, but…”

“But what?”

“Can’t friends kiss and make up?” you propose.

His hands rest on your bare thighs, fingers gently nudging at your big t-shirt. The room seems warmer now that there’s no distance between you. Or maybe it’s just the fires building in your belly that’s making you hot?

“Maybe…”

You trace his lips with your finger tips while looking in his eyes. You could spend the night like this if it were up to you. He’s beautiful; inside and out.

“Wanna try and find out?” he whispers.

You respond by softly connecting your lips, moaning instantly as your entire body begins to tingle. 

Yoongi pulls you closer, holds you tighter, and encourages you to deepen the kiss you share by parting your lips with his tongue. You don’t deny him, and he invades your mouth—taking over and leaving you dizzy from the lack of oxygen.

Suddenly, he pulls away, and you’re quick to whine.

“I smell wine,” he comments. “Are you—”

“I had a sip, and the rest spilled all over my hands.”

You show him the stains on your hands and shirt, and he just stares in disbelief. “Only you.”

“Whatever,” you dismiss, trying to steal another kiss from his wet lips. “I need you.”

You drag your crotch across his lap, seeking friction. You’re shocked when he grabs your waist, thinking you’re overstepped once again.

“Hold on.”

Yoongi reaches under his shirt and grabs his gun from his waistband. He shoves it in the folds of your couch, and throws you a wink.

“We’ve kissed. Now let's make up.”

With a smile, you get up and grab his hand.

“Follow me…”

“Get on the bed,” he moans against your lips, pulling away to take off his shirt. 

You begin to move, but a thought pops up in your mind. 

Instead of climbing on the bed, you watch him remove his t-shirt and reveal his ink covered body. You bite your lip in awe at the masterpiece standing in front of you. He has no idea how hot he looks while simply undressing. You’re ready to pounce on him right now, but you pace yourself.

You have all night.

When Yoongi notices you’re still standing in the same spot, he tilts his head with a puzzled expression.

“Change your mind?” he quizzes.

You shake your head, and close the small space between you. Before he can say anything else, you drop to your knees. With skilled hands, you pull on his belt until it's free from the buckle. You flash Yoongi a smirk when you discover he’s watching you with those dark eyes. 

As you pop open the button on his pants, your other hand flattens over his denim covered dick, noting the way it begs to be freed.

“I can’t wait,” you murmur, stroking it over his jeans. 

Once you’re finally able to access his underwear, you reach inside and retrieve his thick, warm cock. You don’t care if you moaned before your lips even touched it. Shame is long gone, and you aren’t afraid to show Yoongi how long you’ve been waiting for this.

“I can tell,” he scoffs.

You let his smart remarks slide for the sake of your impatience, and move in to run the tip of your tongue up and down his slit. His precum oozes out and coats your taste buds, giving you a tiny sample of what he’ll taste like when he dumps his load on your tongue. 

Yoongi hisses, probably reacting to sensitivity. You keep going, giving him a moment to ground himself before you give him the real deal.

While you tease him, you admire his girth. He’s heavy in your hand, but his dick is the perfect size to wrap your hand around it. It’s smooth, but textured and veiny—just like his hands.

No longer able to wait any longer, you part your lips and let your saliva cover the tip. You use your fingers and palm to lubricate the rest of his shaft so that it slides into your mouth with ease. Only when he’s dripping wet with spit do you take him in, and his reaction is golden.

“Ahh, fuck.”

If you could smile, you would right now. Knowing you have him on his tiptoes almost feels as good as the blunt head of his dick touching the back of your throat. 

You can feel his muscles tenses up once your head begins to bob up and down, purposefully slurping loudly to create sinful noises.

“Fuck,” Yoongi curses. 

His voice is rough as he pants through his words, attempting to keep his composure, but failing. 

When Yoongi’s hand finds the back of your head, you look up to see what he’s doing. You keep going as you watch him whisper profanities into the air, running his ringed fingers through his dark strands.

He gathers your hair in his palm, making your scalp tingle and sting due to his strong grip. He starts controlling your movements, managing how much of him you take in at once. It’s not long before you’re choking and gagging on his cock. 

Drops of your spit and tears fall to the floor. Your head starts to spin from the vigorous motions, but the feeling doesn’t prevent you from allowing Yoongi to fuck your throat until it’s raw. 

Craving more, he thrusts into your mouth. The look on his face and the desperation of his movements lets you know he’s almost near his peak. However, once he realizes what’s happening, he swiftly pulls out, leaving you coughing due to the sudden intake of air.

“Look at me,” he commands after you catch your breath. “You’re fucking hot for that.”

“Thank you—”

Yoongi’s hand smacks the smirk off your face. You’re caught off guard, but that doesn’t stop your pussy from gushing at the change in his tone.

“But is that what I told you to do?”

You try to shake your head, but he’s still holding your hair.

“No, use your fucking mouth.”

When you try to speak, he shoves his fingers in your mouth, pushing them deep enough to gag you.

“You like using your mouth, don’t you?” he asks, but you know he isn’t looking for an answer. “So speak.”

“I do,” you croak around his digits.

“Now get the fuck on the bed like I told you to the first time.”

Yoongi snatches you up, and you scramble to the bed. You sit and wait for him to take off the rest of his clothes, trying to remain patient as you see he’s not in the mood for disobedience. You weren’t bothered the slightest by his lack of respect.

In fact, you crave more; and if you have to beg for it, you will.

“Second thoughts?” he asks randomly.

You notice that his wallet’s in his hand and after a few seconds he pulls out a condom. You get butterflies the moment he places a knee on the bed. For you, it’s not even happening fast enough.

“No way.”

“Good,” he winks. “Because I’m not gentle.”

“And I’m not glass.”

Yoongi growls when he hears that response, crawling over to you at lightning speed.

“Come here.”

He grabs your thigh and pulls you closer, pushing your legs apart so he can access your center. His fingers trace over your lace panties until he ultimately decides to rip them off of you. 

You squeak in surprise when you hear the fabric tearing.

“Yoongi!”

“Shh,” he coos. “They’re ruined anyway.”

With a face burning with embarrassment, you turn away and stare at the wall while Yoongi puts the condom on. You can feel his eyes on you, observing the way he makes you fidget and squirm.

You get too comfortable lying there in your own thoughts. The sensation between your thighs catches you off guard. 

“Ooh, shit Yoongi!”

Your body reacts the instant his dick rubs against your clit. You’re already worked up and ready to be filled, but Yoongi doesn’t want to skip the foreplay.

“Damn, it’s wet.”

He rubs the tip over your crevice, taunting you each time he passes your entrance. Just when you think he’ll slide in, he moves up to your throbbing clit and repeats.

“Please stop teasing,” you beg.

Yoongi laughs. “Why should I?”

“Because—”

You begin to whine and complain, but your words get stuck in your throat when Yoongi suddenly enters your pussy.

“Oh my god.”

Your wetness allows him to slide in easily, but your body wasn’t prepared to take him all at once. 

You grip your sheets for support, but the initial shock of him moving so quickly takes almost a minute to subside. 

Yoongi’s patient, giving your body time to adjust before he worries about pleasure. His thumb slowly massages your clit, getting you to relax under his touch. When your grip on the sheets finally loosen, he makes tiny strokes to test the waters.

“Good now?” he asks.

“Mhm.”

With your approval, he positions himself over you and fucks you a little deeper. Once he finds the perfect rhythm, he moves your right leg and places it on his shoulder. 

You’re already moaning loudly, not caring who hears. You cry out everytime his dick digs into your cervix, exploring places you never knew could be reached. 

You’ve begged guys to go deep, but they’ve always been scared to test their limits. Not Yoongi; he’s giving you everything he has, and even though you’re barely holding onto your sanity, you’d probably cry if he stopped.

“Take that damn shirt off,” he growls, gripping the giant t-shirt draped over your body.

You almost can’t figure out how to get it off, but by a miracle you manage. Now completely naked, you toss the clothing aside and start groping your tits while you lift your hips to meet his thrusts. You thought Yoongi would enjoy watching you, but he’s not impressed.

“Who told you to touch yourself?” he presses.

You don’t answer quickly enough for him. Honestly, you weren’t going to reply because your mind is so far away that his words just drift through your ears.

A hand around your throat snatches you back to real time. He’s pissed, biting his lip and trying not to spill his load before he’s ready.

“Answer me.”

This time you speak up immediately. “No one.”

“Hm. So you just do what you want?”

The sound of his deep voice mixed with the sound of your slapping skin and squelching juices turns you on beyond explanation. That familiar tension starts to build in the pit of your stomach, informing you of what’s soon to follow.

“I don’t like rules, Yoongi.”

“Oh, you will,” he promises.

Yoongi’s thrusts get stronger, making your body shift towards the top of the bed. He somehow keeps you in place using the hand he has wrapped around your neck, but you’re still being bounced around like a ragdoll.

“Since you don’t like it, I’ll finish up and leave.”  His movements suddenly become faster, and it doesn’t take you long to figure out what he’s implying. “You can make yourself cum, right?”

“What?” you shriek. “No!”

His laughter resonates through your bedroom as he mocks your desperation. You try reaching between your legs, attempting to induce an orgasm yourself but he forbids.

“Uh-uh.” 

He pushes your hand away and pins your wrist to the mattress, leaving you with no other resort.

“Yoongi, I wanna cum. Don’t be an asshole.”

“Better watch what comes out of your mouth then.”

You groan, realizing he’s too stubborn to give in. He’s not bluffing; he’d actually leave you stuck. 

You can taste the pleasure on your tongue. You’re so close, but Yoongi’s thrusts are starting to become wild. If you don’t give him what he wants, you won’t get what you crave.

“Tell me now…” he grunts, lust oozing from his lips. He leans forward, pushing your leg to your chest as he tries to come closer. The coolness of his chains pressed against your feverish skin brings you a little relief, but it’s not nearly enough. “You sorry?”

Fuck.

“I am.”

He chuckles. “I know.”

Yoongi’s thumb then wipes the single tear rolling down your cheek. Your body’s restless and seeking some relief from all the tension building inside your core. 

He finally slows down, pacing himself so he’s no longer ahead of you in the race to ecstasy. His finger gently tugs at your bottom lip, silently asking you to relax your jaw.

“You’re mine, right?”

You nod. “Yeah.”

“Good... Now open.”

Gauging your reaction, he smirks when you don’t oblige. You stick out your tongue, waiting for what you already expected.

Yoongi spits directly into your mouth, and you don’t even flinch. You look into his eyes as you close and swallow. He’s pleased when you reveal that nothing’s left when you open again.

“Good girl. Good fucking girl,” he moans, repositoning himself.

Whatever he says after that is lost between his swearing and muffled cries as he presses his lips against your leg. He slowly picks up his speed this time, allowing the heat to fill up inside of you before he drills you like before.

“Fuck, you feel so good.”

“You too, Yoongi.”

You’re desperate for more tension, but you’re afraid you’ll be punished if you chase it yourself.

“More, please.”

“More?”

“Please…”

“I got you,” he assures.

Without another word, his thumb finds your clit. His name rolls off your lips over and over, surely traveling far outside your bedroom. Your body tenses aside from your fist pounding the bed. 

“Cumming!”

You can hardly breathe, air getting trapped in your lungs as his hips snap violently into yours. Your back arches as a wave of pleasure hits you like a ton of bricks. Your cries begin to fade away and all you can hear is your rapid heartbeat erupting through your ears.

Yoongi doesn’t let up, giving you his all until your body slowly falls back on you. He then pulls out and peels the condom off of his pulsing cock. As soon as it’s freed, he releases his hot seed onto your skin—painting your stomach and breasts white and sticky.

Both of you stay where you are, panting and struggling to catch your breaths.

You can see Yoongi through your heavy eyelids, slumped over and exhausted from everything he’s given in the past few minutes. His hair hangs over his eyes, but you know he’s just staring at your pussy, replaying everything that just happened in his mind.

“Yoongi?”

“Hm?” He snaps out of it at the sound of your voice, gently lowering your leg before he crawls toward you.

You feel like you’re melting when he kisses your lips. It's almost like a dream being this close to him again. Even after so long you remember the way he smells, the way he breathes… You remember everything like it was yesterday.

“You’re so perfect,” he whispers against your skin.  lips make one final journey over your body, kissing every inch of you and not caring about the taste of his cum staining your flesh. He gives you endless compliments and praises, making you bury your face in your pillows. “I can’t forget to taste you.”

“Wait!” you gasp when he spreads your pussy and devours you.

Your sensitive clit throbs in his mouth as he slurps up all your juices. Your body is limp by the time he’s done, eyes nearly shut and your mind shut down for the rest of the night.

“Goodnight, sweetheart,” he mumbles into the darkness.

Whatever he says next is a mystery because your tiredness ultimately puts you into a deep slumber.

“I’m so fucking stupid.”

You groan as the sun pierces your eyes. Throughout the craziness of last night, you forgot to bring your phone to bed with you. Now, you’ll have to walk and—

Or you can ask Yoongi.

With that in mind, you roll over and unfortunately find an empty bed.

Of course, he left last night. He was probably out of the door as soon as you shut your eyes. You can only hope it’s because he has work to do and he’s not avoiding you after everything you talked about. You won’t even let your mind go there.

Instead, you get out of bed and stumble to the living room—finding your phone on the coffee table right where you left it. You’re still getting notifications as you pick it up; most from Kaci, one from another employee, but nothing from Yoongi.

Before you make your daily morning phone call to your dad, you text back that server regarding time off, and see what Kaci’s fussing about.

6:58am Kaci: BITCH YOU’RE STILL AT HOME!? 

7:10am Kaci: you so got fucked last night. i want all the detail STAT heaux

You roll your eyes. She won’t be getting anything other than the usual shoulder shrug. Last thing you need is for her to make a scene every time Yoongi’s in the room. 

7:23am You: omw. please cover for me.

7:23am Kaci: already am. get some ‘good morning’ dick sis

“I swear I wanna kill this girl sometimes,” you sigh.

Before you can leave the messaging app, your phone rings. The number isn’t saved so you answer it with caution.

“Hello?”

It’s Yoongi.

“Hey, what’s up?”

You hope he doesn’t hear the puff of air you let out as relief washes over you. You were sure you’d lost him again after the things you did and said to each other during the heat of the moment. Not like you didn’t mean everything you said, but you aren’t sure if he did.

“Nothing, just late for work. What’s up with you?”

“Not much right now. I might go home and catch some sleep,” he replies. “Your car’s outside, by the way.”

“Really?” You walk over to the window and open the blind, shocked when you see your car parked in front of your house. “How did you…”

“I told them I was taking it as collateral.”

“What?!”

Yoongi laughs. “I’m kidding.”

If he was standing next to you, you’d punch him. You don’t know how you fall for it every single time.

“I have my ways. Just um… do me a favor?” he asks.

“Yeah, anything.”

“I think my phone’s somewhere in your house. Can you check later?” 

You look around to see if maybe you can spot it but it’s nowhere in plain view. 

“I know you’re already late so…”

“Oh, yeah. For sure,” you respond. “If you want, you can stop by and look. The spare key is in the same spot it’s always been.”

“It’s cool. I’ll wait until you’re off work.”

“That works.”

Both of you stay silent, waiting on the other to speak. You realize you should be getting ready for work so you decide to end the call.

“Well, I have to get ready so… I’ll text this number later?”

Yoongi clears his throat before he answers. “Yeah, it’s a burner but I’ll get the message.”

“Kay. Bye then.”

“Hey,” he calls out before you can hang up.

“Yeah?”

“Still mine?”

A smile grows on your face, and you don’t try to stop it. You didn’t want to bring it up, but you were definitely still thinking about last night, wondering what it would mean today.

But you can’t let him have what he wants so easily, can you?

“Maybe,” you tease.

There’s a pause, but when Yoongi does speak his tone grows dark.

“You still haven’t learned, have you?”

You smirk. “I suppose I haven’t.”

“Well, then. I guess I’m coming over later.”

Shit.

If you didn’t think the restaurant would burn to the ground without your presence, you’d tell him to get his ass over here now. The mere thought of a repeat of last night has you clenching your thighs together.

No working late tonight. You’re sure it’ll be slow anyway.

“I guess you are.”

“I’m not being nice this time either,” he warns.

You bite your lip, trying to conceal your excitement, but you’re really bursting at the seams. You’re sure you’ll be anticipating his visit all day, letting your mind flood with scenarios. You decide to go ahead and taunt him some more, adding fuel to the already roaring fire.

“Good. Neither am I.”

He begins to speak but you end the call before he can get it out. 

As you stand in your living room giggling, a wave of nostalgia hits you. You remember he’d do the same to you after you’d complain about something silly. You’d be pissed, so the thought of him tasting his own medicine puts you in the lead on your imaginary scoreboard.

You’ve probably done a lot more that got on his nerves in the past, but who’s counting? It’s your job to push each other’s buttons and make up.

Isn’t that what friends are for?

hope everyone enjoyed !!! let me know what you think !

#yoongi x reader #yoongi fanfic #yoongi smut #bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts smut #bts fics #yoongi fics #yoongi imagines #bts imagines #min yoongi smut #min yoongi fanfic #aaagustd.fics

[mersei47]

mh fix it au doodles that I just got to draw it out (below is my ramblings about this au)

- so like jay got shot but hes not dead and got send back in time before everything go to shit or all is just a big fever dream (I cant decide which one is better)

- and jay is the only one know about this then he has to do something so history wont repeat itself

- oh theres skully too but they are not jay but a different entity that is there to help jay defeats the operator (think of it like when you played game then died first try the second try you got a helping hand or assist so you wont die again)

- skully lives with jay at his apartment while both of them try to find a way to end this (skully is a good roommate if you get to know them :D)

- everyone that got contacted with operator can see skully (means that everyone except mh crew (+ jessica, amy etc.) cant see skully)

- jay probably ten times more paranoid about everything and everyone now that he knows whats gonna happen

- last time jay and tim ever interact didnt end well (at least for jay) so he has mixed feeling towards tim. and tim knows jay been keeping smth from everyone but doesn't wanna pry it out, yet

- skully at first just there to help defeating the operator but when times go on they help jay mending his relationship with his friends too

- one time when the crew shooting movie near the wood area alex saw jay walked out of forest looked disoriented and frustrated with leaf all over his head. everyone at crew just had to come charged at jay asking him what happened but jay doesnt want to talk about it since he knew it would involved them and risk being killed

- there will be time when he learned that he cant work alone forever (because look where it led him in the past)

- and skull know this too so they try to reach out to everyone else (brian, tim) to help jay which is very hard because brian and tim freaked out at first because "dude theres a masked man stalking us wtf????" (similar to how skully try to reach out to jessica in comic)

- jay cant seem to stay close with alex for a very long time because he will have panic attack (I mean alex did kill him and he probably still shocked) and as much as alex wants to ask jay what happened jay cant think of straight answers

- (theory time) now that I think about a way to defeat operator the only things I can think of is 1. defeat it within the ark 2. burn the forest (too hardcore and didnt solved the root cause) 3. or operator is the result of everyone's undiagnosed mental illness they refuse to acknowledged it and get help (jay and alex is clear examples). Operator is still real but it targets peoples like them. If they got the help them should probably can uh fight it off (this starting to sounds like cthulhu stuff)

I tried my best to sound understandable orz

#marble hornets #jay merrick #myart #I passed out half way writing this I actually intented to post this last night #mh rewind au

[ckret2]

Does bill have "a type"? Since you said he only dates every millennium, what kinds of stuff would catch this lunatic's eye? What would motivate him?

You're getting a read more because I listed every single blessed thing I could think of. The tl;dr:

artists (who depict him)

hot eyeballs (subjective)

no head

bright natural coloration

emotional doormats

party animals

nerds, provided they're also attractive other ways

worshipers

things that can injure him

getting gifts

someone who expresses interest first but lets him take the lead

really tacky expensive displays of wasting wealth

someone he thinks is similar enough to "understand" him

This is the first point because it's the answer he'd give: if you ASK him, he'll say he's "a complete sucker for those deep, brooding artist types." He'll say this like it's his biggest weakness. He says it like it's a charming little character flaw. This is the narrative he tells himself. What he ACTUALLY means is if you hit on him, and if you have created art of him (visual art, sculpture, music, poetry), the odds that he'll return the interest go up by 1000%. He is incredibly vain, he loves art of himself, and "willing to give Bill art of himself" is an insanely attractive trait.

Some species have sexy eyeballs. Other species don't. It just so happens that Earth, as a whole, has evolved an array of eyeballs that are by and large pretty sexy when compared to the multiversal baseline. Those little, like, thready filament things in the irises? Mesmerizing. Visible veins?? Drive him crazy. Bloodshot eyes? Gonna be haunting his fantasies for weeks. Top tier is those frog eyes with multiple colors or crazy crackly-looking patterns.

He's not a fan of heads. Like, when a species puts a face on a little bobbly looking thing separated from the rest of the body, rather than right on the torso where it belongs? Looks weird. It's not a dealbreaker but he's definitely more attracted to species that put their faces where they belong. Similarly, a mouth without an eye in it looks weird.

Big fan of bright colors. You know what's attractive? Looking like Lisa Frank colored you. Wearing bright colors isn't as good as being bright colors, but he still finds wearing bright colors to be an attractive trait.

If you combine the last three points, I think that I accidentally made Bill's ideal lover a poison dart frog.

Usually at some point pretty early in the dating process he's gonna say something like "Just so you know—really, I'm not as bad as all the rumors and gossip and ancient legends and globally-broadcasted warning PSAs make me sound. But: I am totally crazy. You wanna stick with me, you've gotta be cool with crazy." What he's looking for is someone who says "oh I am SO cool with crazy, I am the MOST cool with crazy, crazy is GREAT." When he says this, he's not saying "I'm actually mentally ill and need someone who's supportive and understanding." He's also not saying "I'm a wild crazy fun party guy and I want a partner who can keep up with that lifestyle." What he's saying is "I am an inconsistent and inconsiderate asshole who will show no regard for you, and in a year when you're complaining about the selfish harmful things I'm doing, I'll get to roll my eye and go 'I THOUGHT you SAID you were COOL with crazy. Are you NOT cool with crazy??' And then I'll complain about you to my friends." So: he'll focus on naive emotional doormats he can push around. He'll probably draw back from someone who stands up to him, unless he got seriously interested in them before they grew a spine.

But that said, he is also more likely to show interest in people who can keep up with his lifestyle. He parties with apocalypse machines. If he sees an alien at a party where three absolutely wasted demigods started mixing sink chemicals and accidentally set off a big bang that took out half the neighborhood, and the next weekend he sees that alien at another party? That means they party hard, they don't scare easy, they don't die easy, and they avoided the cops. That's somebody he wants to spend time with. If they're not lover material, they might be Henchmaniac material. Similar opinions on substance use and mass destruction a plus.

He's kinda into nerds. Not in and of themselves, but if they already hit other traits he likes, that's a plus. If he has a choice between two identical people and one's dumb as a rock, he prefers the one who knows lots of things and likes to share facts and trivia. Bill goes for long, long stretches without feeling curiosity, and those stretches typically coincide with when he feels most depressed; someone who can drive him to think a little bit is a godsend.

If someone literally worships him, like as a god, he's into that. It's not partner material but he'll put a star next to their name in his booty call list.

Any novel Extreme Sensations, he likes. Particularly pain. Not a lot of stuff can hurt him in his true form. If someone can make him feel pain, that's interesting to him. Not even necessarily in a BDSM way. If holding someone's hand feels like being electrocuted, or they give off a gas that makes everything too loud and makes him see weird colors? That's someone he wants to touch.

I think I've just added another trait to the "poison dart frog" column.

His love language is gifts & favors, both giving and receiving. If somebody gives him a gift, he'll remember them positively. Even if it's a kinda lame gift. It makes him feel liked. Roses & chocolates would work on him.

He's not liable to be the first to express interest, because he finds being rejected utterly devastating. On the other hand, he prefers to take the lead/call the shots in a relationship. So if somebody lets it be known that they're interested in him, but then hangs back to allow him to make the first move? Appealing.

He's a sucker for gold and tacky displays of wealth. Like he's sort of disgusted by wealthy people, but he's very into wealth. If you're rich have fun with it. If you're not ordering a $900 sundae coated with gold leaf just because you can then what's the POINT. Also, Bill is tacky. If some multidimensional billionaire decides to show an interest in him by gifting him an extremely ugly diamond-covered top hat, he'd probably let them do things to him that he wouldn't even confess to his doctor. (He doesn't have a doctor but.) I think what this boils down to is that he's only into rich people who are living like they want to go broke as soon as possible.

He goes through most of his existence feeling like Nobody Understands Him. Part of this is because he's bad at communicating his sincere feelings & emotional needs and even worse at relating to or caring about other people; but part of it is just because there's not a whole lot of people who can directly relate to "my ambition drove me to destroy my entire universe and ever since then I've been grappling with the paralyzing guilt while struggling to find a new universe." So when he DOES meet somebody who he believes can really, truly understand him the way most people can't? He emotionally latches onto them HARD. Not necessarily romantically, but it easily could be. This is last on the list but probably the most important point to getting a genuine emotional connection rather than fleeting physical attraction from him.

Example that hits multiple of the above points: one of his longest & most emotionally meaningful relationships was with a sentient black hole who—quite literally—destroys anyone who gets too close to her, and is constantly wracked with chronic pain due to being a fucking black hole. She did poetry at open mic nights. She'd go up to a mic and say something like "this poem is called The Taste Of Unwillingly Consuming The Solar System You Called Your Home" and then scream into the microphone for five minutes without pause. Bill was like "she's the only one in the multiverse who Gets It." He is a sucker for brooding artists. She let him get away with unspeakable things because he's one of the only entities powerful enough to get physically close to her and survive. Which was incredibly painful, but hey, he was into that too.

Maybe they'd still be together if she looked like a frog.

#(and it's more like once every million years. but that's ON AVERAGE not a schedule) #(like he might have three partners in a millennium but then a billion year dry spell) #anonymous #ask #about my writing #bill goldilocks cipher

[dorkfruit]

i put this together using my computer's trackpad so the new year is already starting out . bad .

posts: J | F | M | A | M | J | J | A | S | O | N | D

template

reflections on the year, my plans for the future, some studies i did, and wips for the next year all down below for those who are interested

tldr; we will be ianthing next year so watch out!!

oh dear lord it's been another year. 2024! can you believe it! i don't talk much on this blog because i have a tendency to talk too much, but it's my little new year's treat, so here we go.

RECAP

i started taking drawing "seriously" in December of 2020, starting to do studies and stuff, and each year since i've ramped it up more and more. this year, i did. a lot of studies. there's probably like at least 200 more in my folder now (not including the 300 days worth of gesture drawings i did), with things like painting, faces, feet, poses, etc. anything i was struggling with, i went right into studying it. my art has been mediocre for a pretty long time now, and it's only the past few months where i feel i'm starting to get the hang of it, which is exciting!

more importantly, i started posting a lot more on this blog. i really like documenting my progress, looking on where i was before and seeing how i've improved. everytime i draw some fanart, im like, oooghh i can't wait to show my (: followers (: !! lots of locked tomb art of course. i've been trying to nail the energy of the different characters, which is why i enjoy books so much, because you get a lot of creative control. drawing ianthe is my fav of course, cause she's my lil nasty, but also i enjoyed doing designs for characters i hadnt thought about before, like judith.

in addition to the locked tomb, we had some new fandoms that got brief moments in between iantheposting: Fear and Hunger, Postal, Faith The Unholy Trinity, and a couple of old ones too, like We Have Always Lived In The Castle and The Merciless.

i posted about 115 times this year, although most of those are shitposts LOL i love posting stuff on my blog and showing people my stuff <3

THE FUTURE

my plans? do more ianthe art, of course. ill be working on more studies, probably going to work on developing a style, and figuring out how to paint. i'd like to do more actually finished pieces, but let's be honest, it'll still be mostly shitpost doodles. i'd like to do more weird stuff. i've been messing around with some gore and NSFW near the end of the year, and it's fun to draw for me. i like idk art that evokes some type of emotion, especially discomfort, and so i find that type of art fun to do, so if you don't enjoy what i've done thus far in that direction, perhaps this isn't the blog for you. i really like horror media, and so i want to do some stuff like that too.

for specifics, i like western type art, a comic book-esque style i'd like to aim for. but i'd like it to be a little more. weird with it. i find comic books often draw all the characters the same, and make all the characters traditionally attractive, and that's boring to me so i'll have to work on finding a way to keep things weird, while also appealing in a graphic sense. the worst thing my art could be is bland and forgettable.

locked tomb wise... more tridentarii art. need to be really weird with it. i have lots of wips planned, like i have a whole page worth of just thumbnails, so i wanna get some of those done. also i had a few animatics i wanted to do. mostly stupid shit, once i learn how to do animatics, then we'll do actual serious ones. id also like to do more comics. i have some comics storyboarded out with my girlies, i like telling a story so, need practice on that. id also like to develop a way to consistently draw them, for convenience sakes, so i'm not fighting for my life every single time i draw these characters. oh and i wanna do some outfit stuff. i draw them in like. generic clothes everytime but i'd like to come up with a few actual outfit designs, that i can just reference back to. and, of course, more shitposts. lots of stupid shit in 2024 for sure. there was something else i wanted to say here but i can't remember.

ART

oki enough rambling, here's some IMAGES for yall to look at i know everyone loves to look at images.

began this year by warming up with gesture sketches (almost) every day. i started with 20 poses (30 seconds each), and then in november i was like. ugh my hands suck i need to get better at hands, so i switched to doing 10 hand sketches (60 seconds each). i want my art to be very energetic so it's important that i do these !!

anatomy studies of extremities because i'm flopping at those -_- ive gotten better with hands but they're still a struggle. i hate feet tho still

need to get my painting game up. i joined an art forum to get advice, and the biggest suggestion i got was working on my values, so i did various value studies. also lots of faces because my faces flop !!

random doodles to work on drawing from imagination. on my "sketchbook" pages, as i like to call them, i'm usually pretty loose and messy, since the point is just to be drawing so often these will suck, but that's fine. i don't think very much when i draw faces on here either so they end up being in my Instinctive Style i suppose you could say

ianthe wip. i was planning to do a few drawings based on the idea of her having Missing Arm nightmares, but the lineart was intimidating to me so i haven't worked on this one more yet /: also there was going to be a toontown gay homosexual toxic yuri comic that i was gonna put here with it but the page is way too long so umm guess that'll have to wait.

...

anyways. thank you for reading if you got to the bottom of this! i appreciate all the support that i've been getting lately (extra big kissies for the same like 5 people who always reblog my posts youre the best). and we will be ianthing soo hard in 2024 so watch out!!

#and god bless. there is not a single background in any of these images. sketch on a white bg foreverz!! #my art #art meme #ianthe tridentarius #really got to tag her here bc . all this art is of her LOL

[epithet-beloved]

ill try to keep my ramsey-related requests limited cause i dont wanna lose control but what are your dating headcanons for him 🤔

DATING RAMSEY MURDOCH

synopsis…  headcanons about dating Ramsey Murdoch !

ft. Ramsey Murdoch 

tags… relationship study, fluff

word count… 839

a/n… never feel bad for sending requests that’s what we’re for !!! It always makes us happy and we love writing these !! Also I promise you will catch me writing other characters in the future (I have a silly Slim post locked and loaded in the queue) for now I’m just snatching all the Ramsey posts and I feel confident about this one in particular because I am a Ramsey kisser myself so boy do I have headcanons ✧ 🦇

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Starting off strong Ramsey is really into physical affection. Hand holding, hugging, kissing; you name it. He’s up for all of it.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 So part of dating him is genuinely just having him hover around you constantly with at least an arm wrapped around your shoulders, whether you’re in public or in private (he has no problem with PDA; but if you do, he’ll stop. Your comfort comes first!)

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He’s a really attentive lover, he’ll memorize small things you mention about yourself or stuff you like

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 If you mention you want something, he will probably definitely get it for you as a gift, no matter how cheap or expensive it is. He’s big on gift giving too.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Genuinely? He does not understand how you find him attractive, people usually recoil or make a face when they see him.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 And yet you look at him with those big eyes full of admiration and wonder… Oh he could just melt right then and there. No one has ever really looked at him like that.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Call him handsome? Gorgeous? Beautiful? Anything? He’s gone. There’s steam cartoonishly coming out of his ears. He is unresponsive and his face is redder than his hair.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 It’s kind of part of the fact that draws him to you: you’re not disgusted by his appearance at first glance, nor do you seem to find it hard to look at him; he knows he’s not the most attractive person and to think you do find him attractive?? The most beautiful person he’s ever seen??? He’s a WRECK

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 It is so obvious when this guy has a crush on someone

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He hands you flowers he morphed into gold. He just always kind of stands around you when you’re in the same room. He definitely tries to flirt just to fluster you or hear you laugh.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Even if he fails catastrophically at flirting with you and falls over while trying to lean on a wall, he still claims it as a success if he hears you laugh (before he melts into a puddle when you’re all worried asking if he’s okay)

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 All in all Ramsey is very open with his emotions. You can easily tell when he dislikes or likes someone, he feels like it's not worth hiding it.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 But when you start flirting back and showing genuine interest in him? He’s terrified you’re making fun of him. Because why would someone as gorgeous as you want someone like him???

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Please hold his face and comfort him. He has small tears in his eyes if you do but he promises they’re happy tears

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He understands that perhaps what someone has inside is more important than the outside, but he has to admit the judgment of the outside still hurts a little bit

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He has so much to offer in terms of personality and affection and you definitely get to see all of it.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Think of a love language and this guy probably has some of it in him.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Physical touch? Absolutely. Big cuddler. Holds you like a teddy bear if you sleep in the same bed (he snores really loud though so good luck with that)

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He’s also warm so bonus points in winter you have your personal heater

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Gift giving? As mentioned above, mention literally anything you like and he’s getting it for you. He might have scammed someone to get it if it’s expensive. He does not tell you.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 And he hopes you don’t figure it out because he does not want to get yelled at. He just wanted to get you something nice :(

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Acts of service? He’s not a morning person but would absolutely get out of bed earlier than you in the morning to make you both breakfast. 

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He’s not a very good cook but he tried his best!

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Quality time?? SIGN HIM UP

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He loves date nights. He gets so excited to do anything with you. But honestly? His favorite way to spend time with you is at home with some takeout and maybe watching a good movie together (and maybe you also cuddle)

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He also likes cooking with you but again. Not a really good cook. You’ll have to do most of the work. Sorry

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 By the way the flirting he does with you pre-dating does not change in the slightest after you’re an official thing. 

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He’s just more confident now and has no problem sounding all cheesy. He looooves making you flustered

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He’s the type of guy to point at the scar on his eye and ask you to kiss it better

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 (He just wants an excuse to kiss you)

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 My favorite headcanon is that he would definitely turn something of yours into gold so you just always kind of have a memento of him with you, he thinks it’s nice. 

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He’s a good partner but certainly not perfect (who is, honestly) so there might be some bumps in the road here and there

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 But no matter what he absolutely adores you and wouldn’t trade what you two have for anything in the world

#🦇's writings #epithet erased #epithet erased x reader #epithet erased imagines #ramsey murdoch x reader #ramsey murdoch imagines #ramsey murdoch #𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 request !

[widdlediddle2]

hey hey! could i hear abt the royalty au if you have more info on it! 👀

HIII SORRY FOR THE WAIT I WAS BUSY MOVING INTO MY NEW ROOM AND IT TOOK A WHILE

i dont have alot of drawings at the moment but heres a screenshot of an animatic thing i was working on before

Akko! princess of the stars, she does not have royal blood in her because shes an adopted kid. Her moms are the queens of their kingdom. Chariot and Croix.

Childhood friend of hers is amanda! despite being a knight in training akko made amanda her sworn knight

some other people that have a part in this story is constanze and jasminka!

theyre amandas best buds

constanze works as a blacksmith/craftsman she helps with repairs and makes armor for amanda

jasminka works in a bakery, akko would often eat there cuz the castles pastries just arent cutting it

oh yea the reason hannah is there is because she sneaks out her kingdom like once a week and buys some of jasminkas desserts

during her final year as a page amanda would help out the towns people with small things and 2 of her tasks were to help jasminkas family with moving crates full of ingredients to the bakery and help constanzes workshop by getting materials for her.

during the times she would help them out she got close with both of them forming a bond over a short period of time

they end up hanging out with eachother mostly everyday when amanda is finished her daily knight duties

croix puts lots of pressure on akko sometimes because since she was adopted alot of people didnt see her as noble so she has to work twice as hard to prove herself

akkos crown is the same thing as the shiny rod

instead of it being a wand the 7 stars are on her crown each time she unlocks one the certain star will shine on her crown

i do have story written out for Lotte, sucy, and diana but i wanna draw them first before i show yall plus i feel like this post is getting really long but ill be backk

i hope this wasnt too confusing to read!

thank you for the ask! :)

#i am currently in the process of writing Hannah and Barbara's story #sljadhlsidhalsjdhlashd #i cant write story lines well so lemme know if i need to go more in depth #little witch academia #akko kagari #lwa #croix meridies #chariot dunord #ursula callistis #amanda o'neill #jasminka antonenko #constanze amalie von braunschbank albrechtsberger #hannah england #royalty au

[bosskie]

'Friend, Please...'

This might be the most personal Molluck piece I have ever posted here... Drawing this was like therapy to me and I don't remember me ever crying so much while drawing... I just wanted to draw Molluck smiling at me because I really needed it, and while drawing I listened to songs that described my feelings. I was also able to find two new songs to me that made me cry multiple times... They just hit me hard when I looked at Molluck's sweet smile...

So, I wanted to name this piece after one of those songs, 'Friend, Please', from Twenty One Pilots. I only knew like three songs from them before yesterday and while listening to one of them that described my ill thoughts, I felt like trying out more songs from them. That another song I found was 'Lovely' and it just relates so well my self-hatred and depression, just like that Friend, Please... I have just wanted to 'leave' so many times for over a decade but here I am, alive. I don't still feel like life is worth living but I'm trying my best with finding it out, why to stay alive.

Sometimes, I just think that the world doesn't need the stuff I create and it would be better if I just quit but then it just comes to my mind to think that who would then love Molluck like I do... Even I know that Molluck is fictional, it feels like he does live inside my head. My mental health problems make it difficult for me to really connect with real people because I just think that I'm not really worth of being with... But my love for Molluck just keeps me alive since I just don't wish to take myself away from him... I don't wanna cause such a sorrow or leave him...

Oh, and I wanna say that I don't mind seeing people hating him or calling him nasty or whatever; I'm more like just interested in seeing how the others see him. It only makes me feel somewhat 'nauseous' to see him being killed / dead...

But yeah, also related to this piece, I would like to say that I do feel like Molluck is mainly a friend, though my love for Molluck ain't platonic, but I feel like I just don't understand those 'basic romantic things'... So, even Molluck feels like the love of my life, I find marriage odd... It's just a legal thing or something for me, about sharing the property. I just prefer friend-like true love but yes, Molluck also evokes some 'other desires' in me but just because I love him so much and he is just the most beautiful creature/thing I know... And despite of those 'other desires', I do prefer him just like he is but you can imagine him with that stuff, if you know what I mean.

But well, I don't know what else to really say. I drew him without clothing because it's easier to be with him when his clothing doesn't restrict him. Nudity is natural to me.

This piece was sketched with blood, tears and love.

#molluck #oddworld molluck #molluck the glukkon #oddworld #art like a bosskie

[slutforsnow]

I swear im trying for chapter 6 of The Blue Note 😔 My fyp isnt giving more astv edits 🥲 anyways, to feed the twilight community im here to offer

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✨️A JASPER X OC FIC✨️

A Cowboy's Dream

Character info:

Name: Eliana (el-e-anna) Smith

Nicknames: Eli (El-e), Ana, Silly, Star Girl

Insults: Accident, Freak, Weirdo, r-slur

Age: 17

Birthday: April 6th

Blood type: O-

Mental illness/disorder: Autism

Sexuality: Omnisexual

Gender: Female she/her

Backstory: Eliana was born in with a semi-normal family. She had a father, Michael, and a mother, Terra. When Eli had turned about 6 months old when Michael realized he was gay and wanted a divorce. Terra went along with it, as she was a closeted lesbian. She couldn't stand being in a marriage with a man, so once the divorce was finalized, Michael and Terra stayed friends but went to live on their lives. Terra kept Eliana, as Michael wasn't sure that traveling in a van would be safe for a 6 month old, and met her later wife -Vanessa- when Ana was 3. They got married on Eli's birthday, with her permission of course, and have given Eliana the world and more that a girl could ask for while living in Forks, Washington. Michael comes to visit Eliana for special days just whenever she wants to see him because Terra and Vanessa decided that it'd be good for her to have connection to her father, despite calling him "Uncle Mike." Eliana was diagnosed with autism at 7 years old after she had a meltdown about having to sleep on silk sheets in a hotel that the 3 women were staying at for a trip.

She's lived in Forks her entire life and doesn't mind the quietness or rain because at night, when the rain clears, she see the stars and often draws pictures out whatever shape(s) she sees in them.

START NOTE: IM AUTISTIC AND CAN RECLAIM THE R SLUR. I WILL AVOID USING IT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE SO IT MAY ONLY POP UP 1 OR 2 TIMES. If people are uncomfortable, I'll remove the slur from the story entirely <3

First Meeting

"Do I not look Italian-?" Eli asked, laughing as Mike was in shock learning the autistic member of the group was Italian.

"No, you look white-!! Like, white white." Mike protested as Eliana walked with Bella to her truck.

"Bye bye, Mikey~!" She called as Bella shook her head and ruffled Eliana's dual colored hair.

"So, I'm guessing you and Mikey are close?" Bella questioned as Eliana moved closer to her to avoid bumping into the Cullens.

"Eehhhh, if you wanna call teasing each other like siblings close because you're both only children then yes...? Besides, we grew up neighbors, so we see each other every day and let me tell you- being surrounded by loud neurotypicals hurts like hell."

"Really?" Bella looked up at Eliana as the smaller female sat on the hood of the car. "I thought they were ok- a bit better than the people back in Arizona."

"Ehhh, depends on the person. Since I'm autistic, and I don't speak for every autistic person, I have sensory issues meaning I can't handle super loud crowds or friend groups. But they were my only friends, so I sucked it up as best as I could and dealt with it. You, however, aren't autistic and don't really mix with the loud crowd and tend to avoid them as much as possible," Eliana explained pulling a marker out of her patch-filled messenger bag and started to draw stars along her left arm.

"Oh.. that makes sense, yeah," Bella replied after a moment, watching Eliana draw on herself. Throughout the day, Bella noted that Eli would do this whenever a certain blonde was around. According to Jessica, Eliana has had a thing for one of the mysterious Cullens- Jasper. Yet, he was seemingly taken by Alice. It hurt Eliana, so she took to drawing on herself to avoiding staring at him and causing drama.

Yet, every so often, Jasper would catch himself staring at her and he looked away, attempting, and failing, to not be caught.

The reason why the pair did this was because Jasper saved her life exactly 3 years ago today.

"Are you serious dude? The Freak?" A student inquired, laughing his ass off as Eli walked passed, clutching her books and not noticing the 5 squares of toilet paper stuck to the bottom of her shirt.

"Yeah! I mean, besides, it's not like anyone's going to stand up for the retard and won't it be awesome to humiliate it in front of the whole school?" The student's friend spoke up, grinning and seeing Eliana walk to class faster to avoid being seen crying out of distress.

Later that day, Eli had forgotten all about the worry of being humiliated. She felt safe and at peace. Besides, she had gotten to talk to one of her more mysterious classmates, Rosalie, today and she promised to help Eli get a good hair-do that would make her feel happy.

Life felt perfect and completely worry-free... until one of her bullies kicked her in the back and caused her to trip down the stairs of the building and fall into the wet pavement.

She groaned, rolling onto her side and hugging her ribs as blood ran down her face from her nose and her head spun in dizziness. She was in so much pain that she didn't process a car come barreling down to her until she heard a large crash and a familiar voice yell.

Two sets of hands pulled her up, eliciting a cry of pain from the younger as pressure was put onto her right foot. One of the 'strangers' whom had helped her up, scooped her up bridal style as she began to fall in and out of consciousness.

After a few hours had gone by, Eliana woke up, groaning.

"Ah, I see you're awake, Eliana. You gave us a scare there," a gentle and friendly voice said earning a tiny smile from the teen.

"Hi, Dr. Carlisle..." She groaned out, putting a hand to her head and flinching in the process.

"Hi, dear," he greeted, sympathetically and gently running his hand through her long bright blonde hair. The doctor cared deeply for her and she loved him like he was her dad. "Can you tell me what happened this time?"

"I- uhmmm... I don't think I remember a lot of it..." She told him, honestly and shrugging a tad. Carlisle merely smiled reassuringly.

"It's alright, you don't have to try and remember all of it now, but would you be able to give me a gist of what happened?" He questioned, sitting in one of the rolly stools while checking her heartbeat.

"Uhmm... I think I tripped down the stairs... and then hit my head really hard, but I don't remember anything after that," She told him, trying to focus on the light he was using to check her eyes.

"You tripped? Eli... these injuries don't typically come from tripping down the stairs- accident prone or not," Carlisle started, looking at her and she moved her gaze to her hands. "Are you sure someone didn't kick you down the stairs or anything?"

Eliana tensed and stayed quiet. She didn't want the senior to get in trouble, but her silence did confirm that someone did kick her down the stairs.

"Eli..? Come on, you can't stay quiet for this, honey. Jasper and Rosalie already told Chief Swan everything that they know and he's waiting to talk to you downstairs, as he's wanting to know if your mothers will press charges against whomever hurt you and, apparently, tried to run you over."

"He's gonna kill me if I say anything though..." Eli buried her face into her knee that she could move and groaned audibly.

"But he also could be behind bars. Freedom from him, Eliana, wouldn't that be nice?" Ana paused for a moment and nodded a bit, earning a kind smile from Carlisle.

However, before Carlisle could continue, one of the Cullens entered the room with Eliana's stuff. This one must've been Jasper, due to the fancy shirt he wore and his wavy/curly blonde locks were pushed out of his face that as Rosalie had described.

"Ah, Jasper, here with Eliana's things. Thank you, son," He said as Jasper sat her bag by her shoes and nodded, then went to leave, not making eye contact with either.

"Hey, Jasper-?.. uhm... Thanks.. to you and the other person who helped," Eliana called. Jasper had froze at the door when she called his name. He'd never heard it said so... kindly and softly before. There was no sound of reassurance or manipulation behind it- just pure gratitude and the blonde could sense that from her, even without his power.

Partially turning to face her, he smiled at her kindly.

"You're welcome, ma'am. I'm just glad to see you're not bleedin too bad," He said to her, with his Southern accent coming out before leaving the room. This left Carlisle chuckling softly at his son for sneaking in a thank-you to her for not causing him to go feral and Eliana completely in love with him.

#jasper hale #major jasper whitlock #jasper whitlock hale #jasper whitlock #jasper twilight #jasper cullen #canon x oc #twilight fanfiction #twilight x oc #fanfiction #twilight saga #eventual smut #vampire boy #confederate soldier #major #parental carlisle

[taggedmemes]

SENTENCE MEME ⟶ OXVENTURE PRESENTS: DEADLANDS / ch3 always feel free to tweak the sentence to fit your muse.

'YOU'RE A DEAD MAN! DEAD MAN WALKING, THAT'S YOU!'

'you can box him up to go.'

'isn't there some kind of gravedigger's union?'

'aw, you read the rules? aw dang...'

'you just stood there. you didn't do anything! you didn't even try!'

'now we've gotta get justice.'

'i wasn't there, but that sounds awfully wise.'

'oh, sorry, hang on. i've gotta kill someone real quick.'

'he'll think you're trying to kill him. which you are.'

'you've just gotta push that anger all the way down until the time is right.'

'well, it's already dusted in opium.'

'young man, do you know what jerky is?'

'can you move away from the house now, please?'

'we could pack the coffin with dynamite.'

'you'd be amazed how many people try to bribe me to declare people dead.'

'so you take bribes, you say?'

'people who love opium famously think they don't need any more opium.'

'well i enjoy getting paid money.'

'lost to a child. embarrassing.'

'doctors make mistakes all the time!'

'he might have the appearance of a dead child...'

'do you know what'll happen to me? do you know what he'll do to me if he finds out?'

'he won't be capable of anything when he's dead!'

'do what i tell you, or... i'm gonna have to hurt you.'

'man i get a kick outta you!'

'i don't know, i'm young, i don't think about illness.'

'looks like this chump doesn't wanna die!'

'i seen quicker molasses than her draw!'

'what kind of contest is this?!'

'i've been countin'. he's only got one bullet left.'

'i drank a lot of whiskey today, i could do with a milk.'

'once we've stripped anything valuable off the bodies what's the point?'

'then he comes back into town and he's all shooting the ground and making us dance and all that kind of stuff...'

'i'm increasingly not worried about making good decisions.'

'he seems pretty smart and pretty evil.'

'never seen him love on anybody.'

'he's very angry. that's a sort of weakness.'

'but you'll be dead because he will have shot you at the same time.'

'no one's this lucky this many years in a row.'

'does he look like his spirit has been crushed?'

'listen up fella, i didn't wanna do this...'

'you ain't so humble though.'

'let's push over something big at the same time.'

'there's a piano in the saloon; you go push the piano over.'

'we'll ask his cold, dead corpse, i guess.'

'well now i'm mad. i'm getting increasingly mad and vengeful.'

'it's like this fella's doing some kind of witchcraft or magic. i wish i knew more about this stuff.'

'i don't understand it, but there's something going on.'

'if things go weird, you throw this at him and i'll do the rest.'

'dynamite's not a weapon, it's a tool.'

'it's like any other tool. like a hammer.'

'this is just my walking-around dynamite.'

'if anything happens to me, you kill this man dead.'

'he was disinclined to hand over his weapons. it's his way, so.'

'I DON'T TALK TO DEAD MEN!'

'this is slightly awkward, i was mostly interested in talking to your friend.'

'i've been impressed by the way he killed those men.'

'you line your enemies up in a row and you gun them down.'

'i've not seen many come through with skills like him.'

'let me just go run it up the flagpole.'

'he's a big fan. he likes how you shot those people in the throat.'

'folks like that, i don't think they like people who're as good as them.'

'but... not above cheating. love to cheat.'

'if you get an opportunity to just outright kill him...'

'seems a shame for a young man of such obvious talents to die out here in the middle of nowhere.'

'i don't see your name on it!'

'there's no need to be raising your voice now.'

'this is the emergency prybar for when we put someone in a coffin who's not ready.'

'you're a dead man! the doctor said!'

'i'm glad you're back but, um, we're in the middle of a firefight outside.'

'springin' out of the grave!'

'did i get shot? or did i just get nearly shot?'

'we have a man to kill! shoot now, ask questions later!'

'i'll duel you right now! i'm young and i'm crazy!'

#oxventure #cowboy rp #western rp #rp meme #roleplay meme #starter sentences #sentence starters #sentence meme #memes

[tamelee]

Hi tameleee i saw a while ago you were working on a story is it going to be sns? I mean of course is it but will there be explicit scenes if ykwim? And also what will the overal theme be? Im mostly curious because I cant wait to read it. When will it release? Ill be your reader for sure 🖤💗

Hi Noneee,

Yes! Oh gosh, it makes me so happy to read someone is still interested in this though!! When I lost all my files (including majority of this story) my heart and soul cracked.. some files I was able to recover in the meantime.. most is lost though.. b-but, BUT! I have been doing a lot of research because the DJ is very story-heavy. I wanna.. kinda.. practice my storytelling more than just show Naruto and Sasuke.. and then them kissing every panel, does that make sense? Because it will be my first time making this. ((Is that okay because tbh I have no idea if people would even like it.)) In that regard I'd call it more a Naruto fan-spinoff story than a SNS story even though there will be SNS-scenes.. So, not the explicit scenes you're thinking of, perhaps for another time.

The story will definitely not be for everyone though so it probably will earn the label "explicit". I know it is my job to properly warn and label it but I also don't want to spoil anything. In that sense, I think if you're sensitive to heavy topics then you're not going to want to read it. Or rather, I wouldn't want you to read it either. Imo 'Naruto' shouldn't have stayed the genre that it was after 699 and certainly not if they were going to carry the weight on their shoulders. That's a responsibility you're not seeing atm. There's a lot to explore..

What I'm writing about regarding 'Theme' kind of challenges that responsibility... it could also be me mocking their current future. Tbh I wouldn't be doing a very good job if you as a reader wouldn't be able to pick up on the Theme while reading and without me plainly stating it beforehand.. Theme lies beneath the story under the surface- it's a question I'd be asking you after you've read it and you should hopefully be able to answer. A lot of gruesome things happened in 'Naruto's story.. Kishimoto just didn't draw it. Well, I'm planning to so there's your warning.

I'm at the stage currently where I'm focussing on dialogue and designing a few characters 🤭

Also thankyou for your interest it's very encouraging 💕🧡

#asktamelee #personal

[sp0rkless]

Hey I hope you’re doing better but if things are getting tough or still are I would like to help as best as I can ( I’m trying )

I know things might seem bad at times but I want you to know that I’m proud of you and what you have become. Think about it 19 years! 19 years and your still going through life and you’re still here your still going and I hope that no one And I Mean No One tells you that you can’t do anything or make you feel like nothing because you aren’t nothing, you are you and that’s all that matters :)

I know life is hard and things seem really difficult and big and scary but you can make it, you Can do it, if you realize how you can do anything you would be unstoppable

Hope this helps

:)

You are

So sweet

Holy balls

Ough my heart

You’re such a sweetheart oh my god. I love you. that’s the sweetest message I’ve ever received anonymously, and easily like top 5 overall. You’re doing a great job and if you’re the same anon who asked me to draw a clown. You’ve actually made my entire year. Like not just day or week like legitimately you’ve made my year I haven’t gotten an art request since like middle school and I almost cried when I got your ask because I was so happy somebody wanted to see my art

You helped a lot and I’m actually going to put this on my fridge (I have a digital fridge I put stuff on)

Things suck and mental illness is hard but people like you genuinely remind me that things aren’t so bad

I’d love to be friends with you if you ever wanna shoot me a message my DMs are always open!

If not that’s totally okay too though! Thank you for the ask either way, I love you and I hope things are going well for you forever and ever and ever

And if they’re not you always have a friend over here who’d be happy to lend an ear or a shoulder to cry on if you need it :} 🧡

[alatismeni-theitsa]

Wait as an Athenian I wanna know what stereotypes other areas towns and cities have of us! I already know what some arw gonna be (πρωτευουσιανοι and all that) but I'm curious if certain areas anything specific for us!

ahahahha okaay! Let the salt commence! These are stereotypes (and we all know what that means) so please, Athenians I speak with, don't feast on my carcass, please and thank you xD I obviously know dozens and dozens of Athenians and have family there, so I am drawing from the experience of many similar occasions and what other non-Athenians have told me. I will speak about the urban center.

Let me start with the positives because they are not too many 😂😂😂😂😂 (okay there are many, I just feel I don't need to explain them that much!)

Obviously Athens is full of creative and strong people, people who have decided to get by in life no matter what, and I admire them for that quality. Fast-paced environments and chaos is not as big a challenge to them. I mentioned that the North is very resilient as well. The truth is we are all resilient, just in different ways, depending on our environment and I love seeing these differences.

Athens has all sorts of people so you can find all the good qualities there. Athens can be hard to withstand for many different reasons - especially if you struggle with a physical and/or mental illness, and/or poverty - but Athenians rise through the hardships. Whatever new thing comes from Exoteriko, they grab it by the horns and bend it to Greek standards.

Ok, onto the bad ones! The grace period is over 😈

Athenians are out of touch the way US is out of touch with the rest of the world. Like, there's just "them and the countryside (Επαρχία)" although the Επαρχία literally includes Thessaloniki with 1 mil people. They also treat Thessaloniki, one of the major Balkan urban centers, as if it's a primitive village that one doesn't even need to visit just because it's not as big as Athens. The whole country goes to Athens once in their life but Athenians don't feel like they have to go somewhere. Some are... I'd say... shocked when they find innovation and excellence up here, let's stay at that :P

Two Athenians I've spoken with so far didn't know what a Poliouchos is... I mean Athens has a Poliouchos as well but they might not notice that other towns have a Saint just like they do and each town has its own Saint?

Sometimes they take this sad face "oh... you don't have THAT in the countryside, don't you?" and it feels offensive if we have it and offensive if we don't xD Or "oh! You have that, too, like in Athens?" Like..... yes dude, we also have running water and cars, thank you very much. Sometimes they might ask you "how did you expect me to know??" Like bruuuh it's your freaking country, and you should be aware of things outside of Athens!

Or they assume that because there's a certain microclimate in Athens, that this climate is on the whole of Greece. And they tell tourists weather stuff about the whole country regarding temperatures and snow that only apply to Athens and a few nearby areas.

Some 25+ year-old Athenians think that being an Athenian gives you status in the eyes of other Greek areas - no it absolutely doesn't 😂 - and they might be ashamed if they show some culture/mannerisms/words from their village in front of other Athenians. Or if a non-Athenian does something that's not usual in Athens, they go "ooh you guys do THAT over there!" in a manner of a white American lady says "how adorable!" 😂😂

Or they insist on carrying themselves with a certain attitude of "hello my humble peasant subjects" when they return to their birthplace or visit other areas for tourism, as though they feel that if they don't do it they will shame THE PROTEOUSA.

Sometimes it shows in series and movies - that are obviously produced in Athens - of an Athenian going somewhere "away from civilization" to clear their soul or find a person opposite to them, and this special exotic place is Sparti or Sifnos or whatever random place the other half of Greece lives in.

Although there's some exaggeration in the previous idea, sometimes it is true that you can tell whether someone is an Athenian from how uptight they are because they are used to a constantly moving and busy environment.

That being said, Athens is not THAT busy compared to most capitals and Important places around the world. Some Athenian professionals are so dedicated and such high achievers that perhaps they think they live in NY, Hong Kong, or Brussels. Chiiiill my guys, chill.

Actual discussion I had with a friend: Me: You know these Athenians came and they were like... like.. Him: Like Athenians, you mean? Me: YES, THANK YOU, YOU GET IT

And let me sneak in the fact that "σε λέω" is more grammatically correct than "σου λέω" because "σε" was evolved first from the ancient form and "σου" came second✨

========================================

Non-Athenians do you agree or disagree with these stereotypes? Have something to add?

Sorry for writing so much but Athens has a large population and half the country observes it xD Of course I wrote many negative things about my own area as well. As in this whole Stereotype Series we are doing, people from other areas feel free to continue roasts for Athens, or for other areas!

#stereotypes #answered #athens #athenians #hashtag protevousianoi #half the country is Athens so Athenians are bound to read this #pls have mercy on me xD #and feel free to roast other areas other in my tag Stereotypes or in my asks

[waitingonthewind]

Out of all your characters (from games or otherwise), which one do you think is the most like you? In what ways? Was it intentional, or was it an accident you only noticed after the fact?

(Feel free to delete if it feels too personal 🙈)

@undead-potatoes aaaaaa thanks so much for the ask!!! i don't love doing self reflection (i have a hard time in identifying things about myself and often rely on other people to Tell Me Who I Am) but i love talkin about my ocs so this ended up really big

ill pop the majority of this under the cut but here take an unfinished doodle of my first attempt at a fursona in this the year 2023 bc i finally had some insight into What That Might Be for me its a leafy sea dragon bc as a kid i loved dragons and also leafy sea dragons specifically and as an adult i love fish and plants and the colour green ok basics covered here we go

its a really tough one, especially since all my characters have huge parts of me in them (u point to one of my guys and there's a 99% chance they're queer and a 95% chance they're autistic), and the majority of my characters infect me with Their personalities and traits (speech mannerisms especially... i went about 3 years peppering the word gotcha into every other sentence bc of ollwyn. in terms of it being intentional, usually only one or two bits with each character. i try my best to give characters personality traits and interests that differ from my own, or at the very least mix and match bits and pieces.

sometimes i'll try and make characters that are so so different from me but then it backfires because it means that im far more likely to pick up that character's traits (i didn't swear at All in my whole life until i tried making a character outside my comfort zone who Did swear a lot and now fucking look at me). i also don't like doing my Research so going for interests that i don't know a lot about means i don't. know anything about them lmao.

i think it's impossible to have a character that isn't at least Somewhat like you, we draw from our own experiences and ways of seeing the world, after all. i know i put little pieces of myself into every character and it's hard to say if there's any One character that embodies me most.

almost none of my characters really look like me tho

all that being said i've narrowed down my entire list to three of note. all three are dnd or other ttrpg characters bc they're the ones that i find myself having to think most about in terms of how they Think and Feel in any given situation and over time would notice stuff about myself or about them that i didn't realise were related.

i think these days ollwyn wins out personality wise goofy, indignant, lonely, desperate for approval, and loud. they're stubborn and enthusiastic, needs to be centre of attention but doesn't want to take the lead. they don't have many friends but latch onto those they do make. i re-realised my rat dreams because of them. i made em a bard bc i was obsessed with music as an aesthetic.

i made em a half-elf because i didn't wanna be Too out there with character creation (back when i was a terrified lil new rp-er who hadn't touched dnd before and felt i hadn't Earned anything more interesting yet). then magic and stuff happened and they got all the over-the-top design elements i was too nervous to implement initially and even that feels representative of my Own growth in being more Out There with my aesthetics and personality (i.e. completely shutting off my social filter, not toning shit down so much anymore)

oh i know i said none of my characters really look like me but i almost never draw ollwyn with their mouth fully closed and i only realised like years later that it may have been just a mild lil projection of a habit. i got big front teeth and breathing issues and i find it uncomfortable to close my lips Most of the time lmao

my poor unfortunately named aasimar (it was 2018........ i promise...............) takes the cake when it comes to suffering the brunt of my neurodivergence and sensory issues, and represents a significant portion of the judgy parts of myself that i try not to let myself be. strong opinions, blunt, tone issues, big issues with food and touch. comes across as, and often is, very critical. the biggest difference between me and them is that they don't feel bad about those aspects of themself lol

where i spend every moment of my life either desperately concentrating on my wording so as not to come across as rude, or feeling shitty for coming across as blunt/aggressive in tone or phrasing (where 99% of the time i absolutely don't mean it that way im autistic pls im autistic if i wanna be able to get the Right words out the tone doesn't match and vice versa), corona just says what they want or what they think, and if people get offended, that's People's fault for not trying to make more of an effort to understand the way they talk.

sal is my Top Oc Of All Time and as such takes on a lot of random aspects of myself (skin picking, fidgeting, latent anxiety, All of the visual aesthetics i Wish i could pull off, my love of birds, my tendency to Mr Burns Posture my way through life. she's also very very australian), while also inflicting things on me lmao ive learned more about my gender from the years of playing her in her rp campaign than in the rest of my entire life. a lot of her experiences and dynamics with her friends and family reflect a lot of aspects of my own

i only want good things for her and constantly put her through fucking hell

anyway they're all So Much Weirder as people than I can really put on paper and in (relatively) different ways but i just know it all stems from the Who I Am of it all

bonus shout out to beki:

she was my homestuck fankid and first proper oc, which also meant that she was only about two steps away from a self insert. because i made her as a teenager, i feel the distance between us more each year, but im still very fond of her, in the same way i am for my teenage self. i wanna pat her head and tell her she's cool and not annoying and that her friends don't hate her and that things will be okay

i think it says a lot about me that all four of these guys fall somewhere on the aro/ace spectrum (almost in order of least to most aggressively aro/ace. ollwyn's a demiromantic greysexual, corona is demi + grey on both romantic & sexual orientations, sal's pretty much only interested in the One Guy Ever, and beki is sex repulsed, 100% aro/ace) lmao

#ask #undead-potatoes #oc #my oc #character talk #ole two toes sal #beki #ollwyn #i cant tag my aasimar #i just cant #idk if tumblr would block that shit ugh #i named em before it all i swear #ty so much for the ask i love talking abt my fuckin weird lil freaks

[r1ddly]

Oh shit wait who is your ex?

Uhhh idk if I feel comfortable putting their @ out but they're a hollow knight and deltarune artist (they also draw other shit but the only one I remember was dragons) but you can dm me and I'll tell you.

Idk it's been a while since we broke up, they were just...I don't even know how to describe them. It makes me sick trying to remember, I'd prefer to not.

I don't mean to trauma dump or do a "call out" or whatever but I'd like to speak on something- the one thing that I remember so clearly if that's ok. I know I'm not obligated to post this or anything but I just feel the need to talk about it ya know?

Obviously because of the topic trigger warning for mentions of SA

Now it was technically before we started dated but it was something that's always been in the back of my mind while dating and even now occasionally.

Much before meeting them I was sexually assaulted when I was younger, and at the time I never really knew how to handle that trauma- especially when I was first on the internet as that also led to more trauma. At the time of being friends I was horrifically bullied online and was really going through emotional anguish and they were the only person I really felt comfortable and I practically worshiped them. They were a favorite person i guess? I apologize if I'm using the term wrong but I was very unhealthy about my feelings at the time and I do definitely acknowledge how horrible I was bad I was being at the time. I don't exactly wanna go into how bad it was as it still is a sore spot but please trust me when I say it was bad.

It was around a specific date that I was really going through it, a mixture of peoples (mainly pertaining my SA) really took a toll on me and out of distress I cam to them for comfort, I felt safe around them and just dumped it all on them, I don't exactly know what it's called or of it even has a name but I remember at the time it felt like it was happening all over again and I just didn't know what to do.

I don't blame them for doing it but because they didn't know what to do they brought someone else into the situation, their own friend who I never really talked to and I can't even express how much more distress I was put into. I understand not knowing what to do, and I understand why they would bring someone else to help but it didn't help, especially when the person who did sa'd me was someone older. I ended up just passing out because of the stress.

Eventually after waking up and realizing how bad I was behaving I went to apologize, at the same time I decided to go into the public server we were both in and vent in that channel (not about the night before but just how I felt like a bad friend) and while I'm in there I see a long post they made talking about the whole situation, airing out trauma to people in the server (had around 2 hundred or somembers if I'm remembering right- which of course wasn't a lot but definitely felt a lot). They also talked about how I was a horrible person and that the didn't want to be friends and (if I'm remembering right) didn't care about my sa and very openly say they didn't like me. And I felt absolutely betrayed, they were the very first person I ever told about my sa, and they were the only person I felt safest. And while i definitely acknowledge I wasn't a good person you just, idk you just don't do that. And what hurts is that he later circled around and wanted to date me (ill be honest I don't exactly know why I agreed to it.) And idk. It just hurt because previously I had also confessed to him but he wasn't interested then but now only a month or 2 later now he is?? The whole incident really destroyed my world, I guess it was the thing that woke me up because I realized how awful I was being and started being better.

It doesn't help that by the end of the relationship (I had gotten somewhat better mentally) I see make a post (on his semi public account) subtly complaining about his friends and me and others and I remember him making a post talking about how he wanted me (or our other partner at the time) to be obsessed with him, to be jealous that he had friends, to spend days and nights thinking about him, to practically worship him and I was so upset I vomited. Because that's what I was originally, that were the same exact things I'd do in the very beginning, but he didn't like me then. That's when I had to break it off. I just immediately told him I didn't wanna date anymore.

Yeah thats kinda the story, i left it vague because really it still spikes up some bad taste in my mouth but it's always been something that's hurt me and has actively contributed to my paranoia and other illnesses. Theres more that happened since that particular incident but it's more pertaining my bestie then anything and I just don't feel it appropriate to talk about it without asking him.

I don't want to excuse my behavior, I very much acknowledge I was not being a good friend but I also can't not acknowledge that I was extremely vulnerable at the time and I just wanted someone who I could just trust for once you know? I'm much better from before but I still suffer and I'm trying to be better especially without any help mentally or anything. I've been on my own from the very beginning and I'm sure I'll be alone when I die.

Again I apologize for posting that if it was unnecessary, I've just never talked about it outside of my friend and my other ex at the time.

#my post #tw: sa mention #vent

[theclosetedskeleton]

FAVORITE AND LEAST FAVORITE NEEDFUL THINGS CHARACTERS??

JUST SAW THIS YAYAYAYZAJZHZ

time to ramble abt needful things 😈

IDONT HAVE A *FAVORITE* FAVORITE NEEDFUL THINGS CHARACTER AT THE MOMENT SO ILL LIST SOME !!!!

LONG ASS POST AHEAD

Leland gaunt:

first original favorite character in the book tbh!!!! probably bc he gets introduced so early but whatever 😼

hes such an interesting character, all throughout the book. FUCK having leland gaunt as an old man i WILL make him this sorta middle aged guy because i CAN GRAHH !!!! I'd get into a bit more abt him but i REALLY DONT wanna spoil the book 🐟

Alan Pangborn:

I think hes the type of the character that went from "okay cool character whatever" to " wait hes actually really cool" . ALSO last week i couldnt STOP DRAWING HIM. I DONT KNOE WHY

again FUCK the way he looks in the needful things movie i am never getting over that one image of him from the movie he looks like all of those blue eyes memes istg. I hc him with blue eyes but NOT the eyes that the movie gave him. when i say blue i mean the non creepy kind because BLUE didnt mean BLUE BLUE oh my god. wait. or maybe i hc him with brown eyes??? i dont know both would be a cool option

Norris Ridgewick:

NORRIS FANS WYA 🗣🗣 100% has to be in this list for sure !!! hes also close friends with alan so thats rlly cool 😼 him and alan are one of the best duos ever !! polly [another char] doesnt exist (NO SHAME ON POLLY SHES A COOL CHARACTER BUT I DONT THINK WE REALLY GOT TO SEE MUCH OF NORRIS AND ALAN AND WE MORESO GOT ALAN AND POLLY [ but then again polly and alan are supposed to be in a relationship so FINE STEPHEN KING.... smh /lh])

ALSO SIDE NOTE I THINK ALAN AND NORRIS APPEAR IN OTHER STEPHEN KING BOOKS LIKE THE DARK HALF OR WHATEVER IT WAS CALLED!!! GOTTA READ THOSE BOOKS THEY WERE IN I NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THE FUCKED UP FICTIONAL TOWN IN MAINE AND ALL ITS PEOPLE NOW!!!!!!!

Nettie cobb:

Shes pretty cool !!!! she kinda deserved better in the book i dont know WHY wilma had this grudge against her (I think it was explained somewhere,, maybe it wasnt? idk) but the rivalrys kinda interesting. Nettie calls Wilma the"Crazy polish woman" sometimes in the book and i found that funny. wait holy shit new pickup line just dropped "Hey girl.... Are you Wilma Jerzyck? Cause youre MY crazy polish woman" I THOUGHT THIS WAS FUJNT

Ace merril:

I AM SO MAD HE DIDNT APPEAR IN THE NEEDFUL THINGS MOVIE. LIKE OHTMYGSJDBS GRAHHHH 🤬🤬💔💔 whatever cause if he did appear they'd probably make him look like whats one of the best ways to put it. "Cool guy" but in the annoying way stereotype. Hes a character who shows in the middle of thr book yet i dont see many people talking abt him

AND FOR LEAST FAVORITE CHARACTERS??? UHH.... i dont think I have much really... or any idk either i have an "ehh 🧐🤨😕" mood abt them, an interesting "🧐😱😼" or a "FAV !!!! HRAJH 🗣🗣🗣" mood abt them and p much everyone goes under the interesting or fav category thingy minus like one or two people but they like barely appear

ANYWAYS I THINK TJYATS ALL. if i added others Id probably just add all of the fucking characters 😼😼 BUT THANK YOU FOR ASKING THIS I NEEDED TO TALK ABT NEEDFUL THINGS (NOT *NEEDED* BUT YK)

#needful things #stephen king #needful things stephen king #closet rambles again on tumblr