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raythekiller · 11 months

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Hi, I've been reading your works and I'm envious. Your scenarios and headcanons are so cool :D I was wondering if you could make a headcanon for the creeps living with a Latina recruit who is sassy but caring to the point she (or they) will aggressively take care of someone if they aren't feeling well. Hope it isn't too much out of your comfort zone. Have a good day and take care

<3333

🗒 ❛ Sassy But Caring Latinx! Reader ༉‧₊˚✧

Featuring: Jeff The Killer, Ben Drowned, Ticci Toby, Eyeless Jack, Masky

#Notes: as a dad friend sassy latino myself this one was right up my alley ty

pronouns used: none

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꒰⸝⸝₊⛓┊Jeff The Killer

You definitely give him a lot of shit. When you first arrive he's all cocky thinking he has a new victim, but then as soon as you opened your mouth, boom, he got dragged. Since he's quite the troublemaker, you'll probably be screaming at him a lot.

"¡Jeff! ¿Que chingado estás hacendo?"

"Slender, the new recruit is speaking tongues again!"

Secretly thinks it's kinda hot when you speak Spanish. The rolling r's just do something to him. While he's absolutely not gonna try to learn it, he ends up picking up a thing or two just from hearing you and the context of the situation. Can't speak it to save his life, though. Still, he makes fun of your language all the time.

"What, you forgot English already?"

Also, he's like, terrible with self care. Not as bad as Ben, but still pretty bad. Doesn't shower for days and hates drinking water. You'll have to threaten him with a chancla to get him to actually take some care of himself.

"¡Jeffrey Woods, chingada madre, limpia tu habitación!"

"You can't fucking make me!"

꒰⸝⸝₊⛓┊Ben Drowned

Little mister Hasn't Showered, Slept Or Eaten In A Week over here. I swear, this guy is helpless. Spends all his time cupped up in his room playing videogames and eating nothings but trash like some kind of fucking raccoon. You'll have the hardest time trying to take care of him.

"Ben, how long has it been since the last time you showered?"

"Uhmm... I don't know, about 9 days?"

" *sighs in spanish* "

Genuinely terrified of you when you get mad and start cussing in Spanish. He'll clean his room, he promises, just please put the chancla down!

Will actually be really happy if you make him Hispanic food. Not only does it taste good, but you made it for him because you care about him, and that means the world. He can't handle spicy stuff though, so be careful.

꒰⸝⸝₊⛓┊Ticci Toby

Not too bad in general when it comes to taking care of himself, but he does just... Forget to eat. All the time. He will just suddenly get light headed and remember he hasn't eaten a bite of food in the last 3-4 days. Another one who loves if you make him Hispanic food, but unlike Ben, he likes his shit extra spicy. Probably one of the only creeps who will try to learn Spanish to understand you better, even if you're fluent in English.

"H-hola, Y/N. Como- como estás?"

"Estoy bien, pero no necessitas hablar conmigo en español, chulo."

Yes, you call him "chulo". He will also listen to the music and just try to learn more of the culture in general to make you feel more welcome. Overall, genuinely puts in an effort in taking better care of himself so you don't have to worry about him as much.

꒰⸝⸝₊⛓┊Eyeless Jack

I'd be surprised if he didn't know Spanish already, which was probably a bit of a shock to you, but a good one nonetheless. He's not normally into gossip, but there's something extremely funny about talking shit about someone while they're right there and they have no idea what you're saying.

"Jeff es tan jodidamente estúpido."

"Sí, ¿verdad?"

"The FUCK you two talkin about?"

You won't have to worry about him much, he takes basic care of himself unlike most of the others. If anything, he's scolding rhe others WITH you. You're basically the parents of everyone else at this point.

꒰⸝⸝₊⛓┊Masky

Has the biggest fucking crush on you and will forever be mad about it. I said this in the ideal S/O post - he needs someone who gives him shit but also looks out for him and the others. The fact that latino people are extra hot is just a bonus. Unfortunately, this also means he's extra mean to you.

"Tienes que dejar de fumar. Te va a joder los pulmones así."

"Sorry, doll, I don't speak 'freak'."

Like Jeff, secretly thinks it's hot when you speak in your language. Hates when you scold him, loves it when you scold others, especially if you get extra mad and start cussing in Spanish. It's just amusing to him. Plus, you make things easier for him now that he's not the only one parenting these weirdos and he's genuinely glad you came along.

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcanons #creepypasta x reader #ray.writes #jeff the killer #ben drowned #ticci toby x reader #eyeless jack #ticci toby #jeff the killer x reader #ben drowned x reader #eyeless jack x reader

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purgemarchlockdown · 7 months

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How Purge March Treats it's Fiction

(CWs: Child Abuse, Cults)

(Edit: Added a few details I forgot to include and expanded on a topic.) So I've talked a lot about the TV show that is Magic over here, and while I don't have as much to say about the fictional nature of Purge March compared to Magic, the way Purge March treats its fiction in Contrast to Magic's is really interesting so I would like to touch on it.

(Note: I am Not at all an expert in Dissociation or the Disorders relating to it. I try my best to research but I think it's important to mention since this post goes a bit more in-depth into it than my usual.)

Awareness

So, Magic as an MV is pretty aware overall of the fictional nature of its world. While Fiction and Reality blur together and bleed into each other in Magic, there is an acknowledgement of the Fiction in it. It's Depicted as a Show after all, we see Amane watching it. There's a sense of Awareness in Magic that these events aren't Reality.

The reason why I'm pointing this out is because Unlike Magic, Purge March does not really delineate between the two. Ironic since Purge March does spend a good portion of time in the real world.

However Purge March treats it's Fiction As a Reality. There just isn't an acknowledgement in Purge March that the Marching Band world of is fiction. The World of Purge March might as well be real.

And in some scenes we can see this lack of awareness in a very subtle way.

In Purge March we have the two shots with the cat over here.

There's a slight change in lighting in both scenes even though both look "cloudy" this is cause the scene on the left isn't actually rainy and the other is. You can tell also by the umbrella.

But again the lines between what is real and what isn't are more ambiguous in Purge March. If you want a breakdown on the cloud symbolism archivalofsins has a post over here and plan-3-mars has a post over here and I'd recommend you check both of them out.

We also have This Flyer.

Here's the translation by tsuwmya over here:

"◯◯ principle abide to the rules of ◯◯ make everyone happy!! together with your father and mother ◯◯ friends who break the promise"

It's incomplete since the flyer is covered that's not the only thing strange with it.

As tsuwmya noted:

the usage of kanjis instead of hiragana doesn't seem to be consistent. 母 (☒)、父 (☒)、原 (☑) kanjis are learnt on second grade 守 (☒)、幸 (☒)、決 (☒) are learnt on third grade 友 (☑) - second grade, 達 (☑) - fourth grade, 則 (☑) - fifth grade

We know Amane is most likely Starting Sixth Grade. The age range for sixth grade is 11-12. Amanes's birthday is on June 27 and she's 12 and school usually starts in April in Japan.

We also know Amane is good at Japanese.

Q1:

Q: Do you have any special skills? A: Nothing that I can call a talent. Perhaps studying. I do well in my Japanese class.

Meaning it makes a lot of sense for her to know these kanjis, and since it's most likely that the school year is Just Starting for her it makes sense there wouldn't be any sixth grade kanjis included here.

It's subtle but it does mean reality has been more subtly distorted in Purge March compared to the lines drawin in Magic.

Which makes sense considering how much Closer it is to reality compared to Magic.

Idealization

Purge March's Fiction is Very Far from the Happy Cheerful TV Show of Magic.

It's terrifying and cruel, you can't make any mistakes here or else you will be "purged."

This scene in particular also reflects this event in her actual life.

Amane is putting herself in the role of both the punished and the punisher. Which is unsurprising considering Amane, to some extent, does believe that these actions are designed to "help" her and notably downplays the amount of pain she's in both in Magic And in Purge March.

Magic also feels a lot more restrained emotionally than Purge March since Magic as a song is very consistent in tone and emotion (the emotion being Forced Happiness) while Purge March cycles through multiple intense emotions and has a lot of changes in how parts are sung.

If Magic was Amane Momose's Comfort TV show where she can make mistakes and be told she can be better. Purge March is the band that she is apart where everyone needs to perform perfectly in or else they will be horrifically punished.

It's still a Fictionalized version of that reality, but it is a lot closer to it than Magic was, making it easier for the lines to blur between them.

Separation (And the Lack of It)

So the clearest showcases of this blurring are at the end with these scenes.

The first one is self-explanatory, the real world turns into the Purge March one. Fiction is taking the place of Reality here.

This leads right into the second one! We're back in the real world but Amane is...well.

Now, I can't really say that the Purge March Amane has replaced the Real Amane. That isn't accurate in the slightest, Purge March Amane is A Part of Amane. This Amane is real, but the world she built around her isn't.

Still there is a level of dissociation present here. Unlike Magic which Very Clearly separates Amane from the fictional world of Magic.

Purge March's fiction bleeds into the real world.

Which makes a lot of sense with what we know about Amane, this is Amane's Most Cathartic Moment of Happiness but also a memory filled with fear and dread and anger.

Plus, we know Amane hasn't fully accepted this murder, even though she talks about how it was justified by god there's a level of denial when she talks about it still.

(Translation credit: onigiriico)

Amane: You are treating me as a child after all. Because I’m a child, you believe that I must have been brainwashed. It’s not like that. I, too— children, too, understand everything! Please don’t just decide that people must be unhappy. Es: … Amane: I’m happy that I was born to my parents! It was a bit difficult, and it could feel restrictive sometimes, but I’m really happy that I could grow up on such beautiful teachings! I want to live this way!

These are Bold-Faced Lies. Magic is sitting right there with it's idealized version of the world. We have 3 different timeline conversations and multiple minigrams that contradict this. Amane straight up called her parents unkind in the T1 VD. (Translation credit: onigiriico)

A: Okay! I’m kind, so I shall forgive you. That’s nice, isn’t it? If my parents were in my place, you would have been lectured for another hour.

We also have the Entirety of Purge March where Amane is talking about how her abusers should just die already and how her apologizes and cries never got through to them.

She even calls them Scum and Monsters in it!

The “It can’t be helped”, from the scum who can’t be helped

If you become a bad girl, monsters will come out This is the magic that stops that from happening

We know for a fact she's lying when she says this. It's the biggest lie she could have ever told, she literally Killed Her Mother.

But the reason why she committed murder in the first place is because she had a righteous excuse to. She had a reason she could use to hide the main reason why she committed the crime.

Yes she is upset at the hypocrisy of the situation and it is motivated to some extent by her cult beliefs but this crime is so clearly one coming from a place of deep unhappiness and anger.

However Amane is in such a stressful and traumatic situation, what else can she do other than lie and cling onto something that gives her stability?

She hates her parents, but she doesn't, this is something she did out of righteousness, this is something she did out of anger, this was decreed by god, this is something she did because she Wanted To.

Why...wouldn't Amane Momose portray this action through a version of herself that isn't the "real" version of herself? It separates her from the actual murder.

And something to note here is that Magic doesn't Show the murder. It's completely off screen in Magic, something happening outside of Amane's view.

Something that Didn't Happen.

#milgram #amane momose #cw child abuse #cw cults #008 #milgram amane #milgram meta #milgram analysis #This got a bit long...ah well

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variousqueerthings · 4 months

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Regency England. Bit more black than they show in the movies.

it's "thin ice," which is personally the episode to me that cements some of this season's (perhaps some of this era's?) ethos. it's also the one that people often bring up about twelve-as-the-doctor, and I do appreciate it. I've had critique of twelve's writing throughout most of s8 and a faaair bit of s9, and I think the twelve that people fondly remember is mainly s10 (with a dash of s9 and a few choice scenes in s8 -- it's not all bad) but I am happy that capaldi was able to give the doctor real nuance bit by bit until we got to this point and can sort of feed that back down the line, even though I'm not convinced that the beginning of writing him knew what it was doing entirely

also this episode has a really big fish in it. and the fish... is people! (sort of, it's an animal, but animals are people!)

sexism rank objectification (female character is ogled/harassed/turned into a sex joke by the doctor and/or a lead we’re supposed to root for and/or the camera): 10/10

sexism rank plot-point (lead female character is only there to serve plot, not to have her emotional interiority explored, or given agency to her emotional interiority): 7/10

interesting complex or pointlessly complex (does the complexity serve the narrative or does it just serve to be confusing as a stand-in for smart, this includes visually): 7/10

furthers character and/or lore and/or plot development (broader question that ties into the previous ones, at least two of these, ideally three should be fulfilled): 6/10

companion matters (the companion doesn’t always have to be there, but if the companion is there, can they function without the doctor– and overall per season how often is the companion the focus or POV of the story): 7/10

the doctor is more than just “godlike” (examines the doctor’s flaws and limitations, doesn’t solve a plot by having it revolve entirely around the doctor’s existence): 8/10

doesn’t look down on previous doctor who (by erasing or mocking its importance, by redoing and “bettering” previous beloved plotpoints or characters, etc.): 8/10

isn’t trying to insert hamfisted sexiness (m*ffat famously talked a lot about how dw should be sexier multiple times, he sucks at writing it): 10/10

internal world has consistency (characters have backgrounds, feel rooted in a place with other people, generally feel like they have Lives): 7/10

Politics (how conservative is the story): 7/10

FULL RATING: 77/100 (if I can count….)

imagine if we'd had this the whole time...

OBJECTIFICATION: Bill wears this really cute regency fit, the Doctor's swaggering about in a top hat he then gives to a homeless kid, looks upon looks

PLOT-POINT: Bill and the Doctor unexpectedly land in the past (no doubt because the Tardis doesn't want to end things just yet), and she navigates everything from being Black to the Doctor's morality. it's a very clear trajectory from episode one (the wonder, but with some personal sadness), episode two (the danger, but with the feeling of doing good) -- in episode three, Bill realises that things aren't so clearcut, and that the Doctor is, despite being her professor, a bit of an enigma to her

it's not as big of a Thing as back with Rose in s1 or Clara in s8, where they were both really wondering whether the Doctor wasn't a bit fucking unhinged (I'd say Martha as well, but her unhinged Doctor flavour was... unique RIP), but it's a bit of that

of course the Doctor has had their own character growth by now so is sort of more able to not fall to pieces on the whole + isn't the kind to seemingly ignore suffering for the sake of the bigger picture, which I don't think would have been on with Bill at all. yes the Doctor speaks about the bigger picture, but it's about protecting the kids

also I think Bill witnessing the Doctor standing up for her was good for her belief in him, as well as her own worth

COMPLEXITY: it's quite a simple plot. a child just fully dies relatively early on, and I don't know why that's shocking but it just is. I think because the plot is on the whole a tad on the sillier side, but then the villain is truly vile, and the the heart is very much in the right place (what if orphan kids were people! what if big fish trapped in the Thames was people!) so it becomes very Doctor Who

CHARACTERS/LORE/PLOT: there's not technically much Big plot advancement, but Bill and the Doctor feel like they advance a lot in their understandings and trust of one another

at the end of it there's a bit of spooky banging on the door, and it's the Master we know this. knowing it's the Master makes me wonder a bit about how the various hints work out. I need to rewatch the bits where the Master is properly revealed, because yes they're bored and frustrated, but how do they really feel about the Doctor seemingly ignoring them/moving on at this point. banging on the door and all that, but that feels more for effect. idk what I'm saying here, it's not actually critique, I think I'm just wondering about a fic from the Master's perspective while locked up

COMPANIONS MATTER: yeah Bill is both emotionally and practically important in this! it's been more than a week so some of the details are hazy, but she definitely Participates. I think a little less on her own steam than in some others, but definitely doing some Stuff

“GODLIKE” DOCTOR: as far as I remember there's nothing egregious in this episode beyond the fact that the Doctor takes charge most of the time and there aren't any really distinguishable single-episode characters who carry some of that side of things. there's the bad guy and the kids, and youknow... hypocritical perhaps, considering how often I've felt like this era has had kids who were kind of superfluous to plot and often unfortunately not good actors, but I'd have liked to have seen more of these kids beyond the Idea of them, if that makes any sense

they're introduced very strongly with the pick-pocketing and the death and finding out where they live, but for the main gist they fall a bit on the wayside

maybe this is the wrong point to be talking about that -- my point is, if the episode had been able to make the kids make more choices in the plot, then the Doctor could have been leading it slightly less

it's not a big thing, it's just a thing

PREVIOUS DOCTOR WHO: the Doctor's been to the frost fair a few times, which is very funny to me and gets a mention. otherwise this isn't much of a referencing episode, and that's fine

“SEXINESS”: can we cross this one off the list for good? (almost, but there's ooone episode I just wanna talk about... well, and then I don't remember if it gets really bad near the end, it's a bit of a risk, as much as I'm so into Gomez!Master, sometimes she does still get the bad dialogue + with the sexism Type that they write the first doctor as at the end of the season... we'll see...)

INTERNAL WORLD: it's the frost fair of 1814. there's circus. there's orphans. there's an evil rich man. there's the Thames. there's the big fish under the Thames. I mean, what more do you need tbh

POLITICS: this is the episode that's famous for the Doctor punching a racist in the face. I cannot say if anyone would have preferred it to be Bill or for it to not have happened at all or... personally I think it's pretty great and of course feels a bit like a direct answer to critique no doubt gotten for some of Martha-in-the-past episodes, where the Doctor never stood up for her and she never really had her worries/fears taken seriously

in this episode you've got a very similar beginning (stepping out of the Tardis and getting nervous because it is 1814), the Doctor allaying those fears in a way that I think was pretty acknowledging of them, while also giving us Black people 1814, as youknow... there were Black people in 1814. including one of the single-episode main characters, so it's not just background characters and Bill

and then the Doctor loses his cool because of racism, which is both admirable and unhelpful to their situation, as it does get them captured. but youknow. you wanted the Doctor to stand up for Martha and this feels like a long time coming -- I don't think it needed to be subtle, I think a bit in-your-face was very needed. now the question ofc is whether we think Ryan and Yaz in chibnall!era are able to continue that... I don't remember

and the next question of course is whether the fifteenth Doctor adds even more layers to the story as a Black character (Ncuti Gatwa at least has said that he thinks so, which is exciting). as a whole though, it's interesting watching this from the perspective of where we are now. Freema Agyeman as Martha shouldered a lot of weight and while I think her character was fantastic and her arc was interesting and nuanced, we know they didn't (and the fandom certainly didn't) give proper space for her to be a Black woman and also just... didn't give her space, in various ways -- however one might have seen it, gracious read is that they "wanted her to be like any other (white) companion, without being singled out," or "they were afraid of writing race," or or or... we know it can be done better (and that if Martha were to come back, say, right now.............) Bill was a very different character to Martha, and after her Ryan joined the team, and since then Rose (Noble), and the fifteenth Doctor are now a part of a much bigger, more exciting (or maybe I should say less depressing) analysis of writing Black characters on Doctor Who, which will only grow as the character roster grows

and the thing is, this season isn't just "important because we need to support Black characters in scifi" in the sense that it's badly written and we're kiiind of gritting our teeth through it, it's... it's quite good. it's not perfect, and I think others could give a much more in-depth analysis of that than I can (specifically in terms of race), but as a trajectory both for writing Black women, for writing marginalised main characters generally, for writing queerness -- which is more my wheelhouse to critique and I do -- for writing the twelfth Doctor's character arc, for the end of this particular era of the show... I think it deserves that kudos. sometimes. someone's gotta punch a racist in the face. and a Black woman can know that her white buddy has got her back. and the two of you can save a big fish and a bunch of homeless orphans and get said racist eaten (or drowned, I forget if the fish got him)

that's good political theory

I want to also note the orphan kids. I mentioned I wish they'd been more fleshed out after the first act/been more heavily involved in the plot, so that the ending really pinpointed how it wasn't just good because homeless kids is... bad... but specifically also from a character standpoint. this especially because one of them died at the beginning, and I feel like it didn't quite sit through the rest of the story -- that being said ofc, the ending is neat. good on you Bill for getting this through and confirming it happened

FULL RATING: 77/100 (if I can count….)

I feel like I did a good summary in the above point. solid stuff. big fish

Just realised "thin ice" obviously also refers to someone who is metaphorically on thin ice- we talking the Doctor taking Bill out even though he's not supposed to? the Doctor and Bill's relationship having a tense moment? the Doctor generally getting "bored" and needing to do something? perhaps and yes, and also ooh big fish

#im watching nu!who #im watching capaldi who #episode thin ice #the measurement

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stoutlandchild · 1 year

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I told myself to hold this in Until I finished the transformation sequence (which is fully sketched out it just needs to be cleaned up, its not fully animated but its real :D) but unfortunately I love Precure and Magical girls and @fourphoenixfeathers AU has transfixed me so your getting AU Thoughts: -Emmet and Ingo are a duo transformation ala Nagisa and Honaka. They cannot transform without each other and transforming involves them holding hands.

(Look Emmet and Ingo are literally black and white and it's also the Precure Anniversary. I need to reference the OGs)

-How Precure work in this universe is basically me mashing what I've heard about Happiness Charge (haven't watched it yet but have heard about its setting) into the pokemon world. So there's International Precure and they help the legendaries out but they aren't given powers by Them. In my head I reasoned that Precure just...seem out of Arceus jurisdiction so there is now Something Else giving people Precure powers. But legendaries can call on Precure if they need some help. That's what Kyurem did for Emmet and Ingo (and then later what Arceus did just without properly asking)

-While Emmet and Ingo are a bit outside the usual age range there not the only adult Precure. I haven't really thought of who else would be one except like...N. (he's 20) I'll think about it a bit more but the point is Anyone can be a Precure.

-Emmet and Ingo first became Cures around the start of BW2, they help out with Kyurem and the Dna splicer situation. Before that the plot of BW was mostly handled by Hilda, Bianca, Cheren and then the Midseason Cure N. There still here but Emmet and Ingo being there lightens the load a lot so it goes a bit smoother...Kyurem fusion still happens though! Both Dragons get fused! It Does Not Go Well! They fix it but that involves a secret special mode I haven't drawn yet (for people who know what Infinity Silhouette is, its that, but Emmet and Ingo get a weaker version of it in the middle of the season, it's there power up :D)

-Legends Arceus however is mainly dealt by Ingo and Emmet until midseason cure stuff happens. They go together because of the aforementioned Duo Situation. I imagine its possible to force them into a situation where they are forced to transform alone. However their Cure forms would probably destabilize and be a lot weaker than it would be if they were together.

-It's simply just not worth it unless you want to purposefully weaken them and and even then an unstable Cure is a bit of a risky situation. If Ingo was amensia-ed in this AU it would be Bad for Everyone.

-Cures overall have a pretty tight-knit community, usually there all really busy but if there in the area/its a really bad situation they'll help out.

-Pokemon can become Cures in the same way Fairies can become Cures. There's not a lot of them but there around. I'm mentioning this because i have plans for other regions (most notably Galar and...if Ash Ketchum ever gets brought in, Kanto.)

-A not insignificant amount of the Nimbasa City population has connected the dots between Emmet and Ingo and Cure Truth and Cure Ideal. It's an unsaid agreement to not say anything, they did however freak out when they found out that they existed in Hisui.

On another thing that's not in-universe AU content:

I love magical girls, so of course when I heard this AU my brain started to think about why Ingo and Emmet work really well as magical girls. Because they really do! I think it's mostly because both of them in there game dialogue are just really sincere and don't hold anything back. The sincerity and earnestness of there personality lends itself well to magical girls to me. I have more thoughts on that but I'm tired, but yeah my point is they work well together.

#magical trainguys #precure au #submas au #submas #pkmn #pokemon #pkmn au #pokemon au #subway boss emmet #subway boss ingo #lord did I ramble...#sorry about that #love magical girls :D

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madness-in-the-flesh · 2 years

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Would you happen to have any Sheriff headcanons? Also coolios on the upcoming vacation. Hope you have fun and get that sweet r&r or however you plan to spend your time.

yeah totally! Here you go anon!

Ahh yeah been super excited for it!! been a while since I got some quality time with my sib n' dad so I'm super duper excited!! +) Got a couple things planned too!!

Sheriff General Headcannons

GENRE - Romantic

Trigger warnings - Stockholm Syndrome, Implied Kidnapping, Murder & Murder threat, Gun Violence & Gun threat, Mention of Children ( Adoption wise anyways. ), idealization, Toxic mindsets, delusions, stalking, intimidation, Maladaptive Daydreaming mention, Isolation

Sheriff is possibly one of the better yanderes around Nevada under certain circumstances. Compared to the likes of others, He's a lot more manageable is your able to work with him. This is due to him being both delusional and wanting nothing more than to live in peace with you but that's only IF you play along.

He often daydreams . This has turned into almost a form of maladaptive daydreaming which has almost gotten to the point it takes up most of the time he spends at his desk instead of signing papers. Which has lead to him rushing it and not being able to get everything done

He doesn't really hide his feelings for you, constantly flirting and calling you affectionate pet names. He'll get you gifts and show you his love via hugs, kisses, etc. No matter how much it makes you uncomfortable and tell him to stop, he's already too far gone. To him, It's almost like you two are already in a relationship and in his ideal fantasy world: You are.

He's nice, easy going but isn't stupid. He won't let you go once he has you, even if you ask nicely. Anything else you want though? it's yours. He'll try to get his boys ( aka MERC ) to come around and help him out with it. Thanks to the sense of community Sheriff has established, most will be more than happy to help him out.

He'll also make sure to get some to stalk you and others to dig up some information. He wants to know your likes and dislikes after all! He wants to make sure he can make you happy and compatible in any and every possible way! Maybe even snag a missing item that he can claim you left while visiting him, Y'know. So he has an excuse to see you and play a little bit of the hero.

Wants so desperately to be your hero, to save you from the madness. Wants you to idolize him and swoon as he goes past and winks. Just overall: in his head, he's the cool cowboy who saves the damsel/Damoiseau in distress aka you. It's just how it's meant to be!

He'll get all giggly around you. constantly complimenting you to the point it becomes awkward. Even the littlest thing, Whether it's about your smell or the certain little thing that no one else knows or should know. He just nervously spurs them out, thinking it's endearing when it makes your skin crawl - terrifying you because he shouldn't know that

You could probably kill him and get away but it would result in the MERCS hunting you down for the rest of your days. Not exactly ideal. He just loves you too much to fight back against you or any violence you throw at him - Also he's cowardly. He'd rather run from you than fight, so he usually flees the room if you start trying to get violent with him.

However, With as much as he'd never dream of harming you. He would never let anyone hurt you. Not in a million years, With how soft and sweet he is with you, It'll come as a surprise to the fact he won't hesitate to gun down anyone who even thinks of you the wrong way.

No one gets to tell you that you aren't the perfect thing to ever grace Nevada. You are the best thing that ever happened to him and he will not tolerate slander. Not even from his own men. If anyone does so in his presence or gets told by another member of MERC, He'll make their death easy but in no ways quick.

A lot of people forget just how intimidating he can be but keep in mind, When he is running in every appearance, both in the series and game, The most deadly men of Nevada are behind him. His voice can get real deep and he knows how to make most people's skin crawl from a tilt of his hat and a couple words alone.

Can get insanely paranoid too which had lead him to keeping you close to him. He doesn't want to lose you, he's already lost so much, will only leave you with his most trusted allies and even then - he's constantly checking in. He just wants to live in peace with you, maybe you could even have kids! ( maybe you guys could adopt?... somehow. ) He just really wants the whole domestic fucking package.

But his paranoia leads him to isolating you you - probably the only one you see. It's both to keep you safe. However this might end up with you warming up to him quicker. Grunts are social creatures and flock to each other because they desire that attachment and belonging. You are no different, so when he is the only one you see in your prison, You may start to develop Stockholm syndrome because you crave social interaction and possible affection.

I would not recommend testing the waters. You can't really trust him as far as you can throw him. If you push him far enough, Break too many of his delusions, stripping him of his ideal fantasy world and force him to face reality? It WILL result in severe punishment and an even worse yandere.

He'll essentially " trains " you to go along with it - To meet his expectations and work hard to make his fantasy a reality. You have to because he loves you and there is no other option in his head. He'll become a lot more colder and easily angered over the littlest mistakes you make. Bereding you with insults for not playing along.

He's not playing the nice guy anymore and doesn't intent when he gave you so many chances to play along, to just give him that little bit of indulgence. Just once, Please recuperate his affections because you're slowly wearing him down and he doesn't wanna resort to hurting you. He really doesn't want too, so he'll get other, expendable grunts to do it ( after - slaughtering them for laying a hand on his darling. ).

He's desperate for you to love him back and he will go to any means to get it.

#yandere madness combat #yandere madness combat x reader #madness combat #madness combat x reader #Sheriff #cw yandere #cw gun violence #cw gun threat #cw stockholm syndrome #cw implied kidnapping #cw murder #cw murder threat #cw isolation

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abandonedpie · 3 months

Text

Little bit of a vent, not that serious but slightly heavier than you'd expect from the subject.

TL;DR designing an ACNH island is suffering and I took that personally

So my island has been in a WIP state since its creation. Got fairly far with implementing my plans, and I've worked on pieces of it here and there, but recently, I was inspired to redesign the whole thing (again). No longer liked all the ideas I had liked before, and overall felt it was lacking. With some struggle, I started coming up with new ideas that I felt good about.

But the thing that has slowed me down the most? That has me already doubting or even hating my brand new ideas?

Paths. It always comes down to the paths.

Custom paths? Default paths? Both have pros and cons to consider. Fellow ACNH players are likely familiar with these issues: loss of footstep sounds, limited design slots to work with (is it worth using 12+ slots for a single path border?), having to make every design from scratch (no Online for me), lines of grass left between paths/inclines/buildings...

And I can't decide. I can't find an answer. Whatever I try, whatever I imagine, I don't like the result. I've hit a wall, and that wall is my own perfectionism. Clearly there is no perfect solution, and I have to compromise to progress—"finished, not perfect" and all that—but I don't want to compromise the vision I have for my island, even though I know that vision is unattainable.

I just want to have an island I'm happy with. And it feels like no matter what I do with it, I'll never be satisfied. I've seen such beautiful pictures and videos of other people's islands, and while they inspire me and fuel my creativity, they also raise my standards for my own island because I know it could be so much better.

I want to be able to settle for "good enough." But it feels like trying to paint a rainbow with one or two colors missing or not quite the right shade. Maybe I can make something pretty, but it's not what I envisioned or want.

So I think, let's just come up with something different. There are plenty of designs I would like just as much or more, right? I'm already struggling because I like multiple exclusive aesthetics/layouts/etc. and I can't fit them all on one island. But...paths are kinda omnipresent, and that means I have to accept them being substandard. Unless? I've considered using minimal to no paths, but I can't imagine that working for me. I'm not going for full-on natural forestcore or whatever (and even that wouldn't look its best without dirt paths, right?).

I guess I might've made this into a bigger deal than it needs to be. At this point, I feel tired and stuck and hopeless, and part of me wants to let it go. It's just a game. But I don't want to give up and leave my island a mess again. For a short while, I was excited to create, thinking I could shape my little land into something great, something I could walk through with a smile and maybe feel proud of. And now I wonder if that's really possible. There must be something I can do, something I'd like, but I don't know how to find it. I'm honestly having trouble focusing on it right now.

Seeking inspiration is a double-edged sword. As nice as other people's islands look, I know a lot of pictures are shared with filters, and even those that aren't...well, seeing images and videos is different than walking through your own island day after day.

I could go into the game's flaws and limitations, but this is what we've got. And it's not all bad. There's potential. The problem is my own inner critic, and I don't know how to get past it.

The best part is that I've been trying to fight this perfectionism with the game from the beginning, when I last restarted my island and named it Wabisabia after the term wabi-sabi, the Japanese ideal/aesthetic centered on transience and imperfection. You can see how well that's going for me ha ha ha! Even if I want to embrace it in theory, it's not so easy to break through the perfectionism cemented inside me.

Anyway, yeah. Back to agonizing over my island I guess. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

#pietalks #the woes of being a perfectionist #current mood: family guy death pose #eagerly anticipating the next animal crossing game #I hope for one to release late this year or maybe next year #they will surely improve on New Horizons. right? ...right?#please heed the pleas of your players #obviously you can't please everyone but consider the things most players want added/changed #assuming the next game doesn't take the series in a vastly different direction

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shutterfox5555 · 5 months

Text

HarmanPhoto Pheonix 200

First Impressions

This week I ran the first roll of HarmanPhoto Pheonix ISO 200. It's a completely new colour film made by HarmanPhoto from scratch, and is being sold as a limited run experimental film. I imagine with each batch they make of it they'll be improving and refining the recipe but as it stands now it's clearly the first attempt.

After watching a couple of reviews on it on YouTube, I metered at ISO 160 as a few people had said it yielded better results and I agree.

Olympus OM2 Spot Program with Tamron Adaptall 2 SP 28-80mm f3.5 lens, Shot on HarmanPhoto Pheonix 200 metered at ISO 160

Outdoors it performed pretty well, although the whites of the highlights are slightly blown out due to the lack of an anti-halation layer. Any areas of the photo with yellows/oranges/red look noticeably warmer than the rest of the image, though with the right subject/composition this could work very well. The grain is a bit more pronounced than I'd expect on an ISO 200 film but that was one of the things a lot of the reviews mentioned. No doubt if future versions of this film the grain will get finer.

Overall I think it's quite a nice outdoor film, you won't get as fine a detail as any other colour film of this speed due to the grain but then again other films have decades of research and refinement behind them.

Olympus OM2 Spot Program with Olympus Zuiko 55mm f1.2 lens, shot on HarmanPhoto Pheonix 200 metered at ISO 160

Indoors in average lighting it starts to suffer somewhat. Still useable, but takes more post-processing and exposure compensation to get an acceptable photo out of it. The grain as a result ends up even more visible and the shadows end up washed out somewhat. Also had to tone down the highlights a touch on the second tone curve to prevent them being blown out. Clearly takes more work in post with this film if it's in unfavourable lighting but still workable. If I were to shoot in these conditions again I would likely meter for ISO 125 instead.

I did also do some night street photography but these aren't worth posting. Even though the camera was saying it was metered correctly they were quite underexposed indeed, and although somewhat salvageable in post the results were poor. In addition, the lack of an anti-halation layer becomes painfully apparent to the point of loss of detail in surrounding areas.

Another thing to bear in mind with Pheonix 200 is that the negative film itself has a different colour than usual. With most films it's an orange-ish colour mask, whereas this has more of a blue-purple colour. Not an issue if you're scanning your own negatives like me, or know a film dev/scan place that knows their stuff, but if you're taking it to the sort of place that just has an automated scanner it'll be bamboozled by the different colour and the scans won't be brilliant with contrast and colours being wrong. Luckily Harman has posted on their website scanning tips for both photo labs and home scanners, so all is not lost.

In conclusion, I would say for a completely new colour C41 film its better than I was expecting, but only if it's in ideal lighting conditions, namely daylight. If you're in direct sunlight I would meter between ISO 160-200, in overcast conditions I'd meter at ISO 160, and in good/average lit indoor conditions meter at ISO 100, possibly ISO 80 if lighting is approaching the poor side. It's important to remember that lack of anti-halation layer, bright spots in your photos will suffer from bloom and being burnt out. For example, the hair of the woman and her paper in hand needed tone curve alterations to stop them looking very burnt out, and even after post they look brighter than they were in person. Best trying to avoid high contrast scenes and meter for midtones.

Overall I'm happy with Pheonix 200, and although it clearly has some teething issues its performed better than I expected a first gen from scratch new C41 film to perform. Here's hoping it's popular enough to warrant more runs of it, as I imagine with each run it gets it'll only keep getting better and better as they refine it.

#photography #film photography #ishootfilm #analog photography #filmisnotdead #colour photography #pheonix200 #harmanpheonix #olympus photography #olympus om2sp #olympus camera #35mm color film #35mm film #harman pheonix 200

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whatudowhennooneseesyou · 1 year

Note

Hellooooo~

Ooh that's amazing! Do you have any careers in that field that have you a bit interested?

Please the amount of tears this love triangle situation had me shed and I just finished crying once more over A (let's just say I found my ideal man) 🤡

Guy B isn't toxic actually at least I think 💭 he basically said he needs to find self love before even thinking of a relationship but he still craves for the affection. He's very respectful and honest but very hurt from life 🥲 but we aren't a match especially since I want to build a family in the future and he's not on the same page.

Guy A though... he's perfection 😭 I am living vicariously through my bestie and if a guy treats her well he instantly gets extra points cause she's like my little sister 🩷

They met yesterday to clarify my situation with B and he was very understanding (he's so mature and gentle as a person 😭). They didn't have the time to go through everything I wanted him to know but he's aware of my traumatic relationship (which has been triggered and I'm getting beaten by my thoughts 🤡) and he knows I don't date for fun and it's important for the guy I'll date to have family prospects. He found it funny I had 6 pages of notes for him and found it endearing 😭 He also said I looked cute cause she showed him a pic she took of me yesterday 🙈 and overall he is still very interested in pursuing me but he wants to see if I can wait (he and my bestie agreed on patience not being my forte). He basically has a lot on his plate and he explained what exactly is going on. He doesn't feel ready to drag me in all that so he wants me to be patient a bit until things are less hectic.

I'm all about waiting but I also am scared. Because he doesn't know anything about me and a year has almost gone by and he's still into me? He's a gem, like the guy is respectful, a gentleman, loving towards his family (he has the sweetest bond with his mother and little sisters 😭💕), responsible, mature, you name it. I'm not that great, I'm average looking, effed up by trauma, just trying to swim along the stormy sea that life is. So I'm scared to say I'll get to meet and be with him. Cause he's surrounded by so many people, he certainly has crossed paths with much better women than me. So I'm kinda planning to do the waiting but without expecting much from his side so I don't get hurt if I find out he found someone else who's better 💭

-🐇

I'll be honest right now and admit I don't really know what to respond to this but I'm more than happy to just hold space for you.

I would love to enter into audio journalism or documentaries in the future? But we'll see where the road goes.

6 PAGES OF NOTES?? WHAT IS IN THOSE NOTES?

I've never written that many notes about someone, not even when I write smut haha.

It sounds like your heart is really with Person A and you're dedicated to him, I mean if he's interested in you after a year then clearly you've touched his heart in some way.

If it were me, I don't know about 'waiting' per say but it's a green flag that he is being honest with you about his current circumstances.

I'd be honestly frustrated with having to wait and would just let him go and see if he comes back.

You've met person A in person right? I want to know what he looks and acts like? Can you compare him to a kpop idol?

#🐇 anon #whatudowhennooneseesyou anon asks #whatudowhennooneseesyou answered asks #slumber party with ruby

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crystalitecloudie · 2 years

Text

I HAVE CAVED INTO MY DESIRES.

here is me rating the twisted wonderland characters by if my self insert oc, mitsuki hanehara, would date them.

yes we are doing this.

♥️HEARTSLABYUL♥️

Riddle Rosehearts ~ 1/10

The chance of this actually happening is pretty low, not gonna lie. Not only is Riddle quick to anger, but he is a bit too strict on rules and following them. Mitsuki very much values her freedom, so I feel like they'd squabble more frequently than anything.

Trey Clover ~ 7/10

I can see it. They'd probably bake together, and his vibe is a lot more caring and loving than many of the others in the game. She'd probably get flustered though if he ever tried to help clean her teeth. Even if they aren't dating, Trey is definitely a person Mitsuki puts her trust in.

Cater Diamond ~ 7/10

Let's be honest, he's only a 7/10 bc I'm biased. Shhh.

Anyways, Cater's casual demeanor probably makes him a great companion for Mitsuki. I can definitely see a "friends to lovers" kind of trope going on with them. Sprinkle in some angst from both of their traumatic backstories, have a happy resolution, and you're good to go.

Ace Trappola ~ 3/10

Friend only. Sorry Ace, you're just not dating material... yet.

Maybe when you're older buddy.

They'd be great friends though. He's just too... brash? Not sure how to put it.

Deuce Spade ~ 8/10

For some reason, I feel like they'd really hit it off. A former delinquent, trying to turn his life around as an honors student, paired with Mitsuki, who was heavily bullied as a kid, yet has recovered and learned to grow from that?

It oddly works. In the past, they would have been enemies, but meeting later in life like this makes them two peas in a pod.

🦁SAVANACLAW🦁

Leona Kingscholar ~ 7.5/10

LOTS of playful teasing. And I thoroughly mean that.

I feel like he'd have a relationship with Mitsuki similar to Ruggie... but she'd refuse to do chores for him unless they were super close. Overall, I can definitely see this happening, but Mitsuki might not be fully satisfied with the relationship.

Ruggie Bucchi ~ 8/10

Mitsuki would definitely heavily relate to him and his background, so they'd probably become close through that. The one big problem in this relationship would be initiating it. But once they finally start dating, it'd go off with virtually no hurdles.

Mitsuki is still probably a bit suspicious of him at first, though. You can never truly come clean from some things, I guess.

Jack Howl ~ 2/10

Sorry but..buy... this one's a no.

The first problem is his tsundere-like personality. Jack has a hard time admitting aloud what he wants, more so that many of the other characters. He also makes it obvious that he wants something, but still won't say it. Mitsuki probably knows what he wants, but without explicit, verbal consent? Nothing is going to happen.

The other problem is just his physique: he is heavily active, and very much "buff". Mitsuki's not really into that romantically. Overall, they'd probably have a mutual distant respect, but nothing further.

🌊OCTAVINELLE🌊

Azul Ashengrotto ~ 10/10

This one is another one that I think would go off really well. They both have been harshly bullied and shunned in their pasts, and Mitsuki has plenty of experience in working at cafés. Their ideals of benevolence are similar, too. Their relationship would be a perfect example of the "Boss x Subordinate" trope.

Their cautious personalities, but their gradual trust in each other, initiates one of the best romances possible on these rankings.

Jade Leech ~ 4/10

They'd work so much better as friends. They do get along well personality-wise, but interest-wise?

They'd contend. A lot. Mitsuki is a city girl through and through: mountains and mushrooms can only intrigue and entertain her for so long before she loses interest.

Floyd Leech ~ 6/10

Mitsuki handles his mood swings like a PRO. She's also really observant, so she'd quickly catch on to the fact that he is much smarter than he appears to be on the surface.

Unlike Jade, I feel like Mitsuki might actually date him, but the chance is slim. She'd still let Floyd squeeze her, though.

☀️SCARABIA☀️

Kalim Al-Asim ~ 2/10

Nope. He's much too chipper... and dense. Mitsuki would get tired of his personality very quickly. She'd also probably feel awkward if he tried to gift her anything for free, unless it was food.

Jamil Viper ~ 7.5/10

They're really not all that different -- they'd just have a hard time trusting each other, especially after the incidents of Chapter Four. If he starts being more honest, though, especially with himself and his feelings, it'll definitely work out.

⚠️Mentions of Chapter 4 (nothing about the actual story included, just mentions about it).⚠️

This one could work, if they are given time to build trust in each other.

🍎POMEFIORE🍎

Vil Schoenheit ~ 9.5/10

Definitely. He's been compared to Riddle before, but unlike Riddle, his "rules" have a purpose -- their positive outcomes when followed. This tough but honest and real love is something Mitsuki heavily appreciates and admires right from the get-go.

The only point of contention would be Mitsuki's self-care, as she hasn't really put in too much effort towards her skin-care: her skin just naturally stays clean, for the most part. Instead, most of Mitsuki's bodily care goes toward her hair, which has certainly paid off.

Other than Mitsuki's imbalance in self-care, though, these two would get along almost perfectly.

Rook Hunt ~ 7/10

At first, I think Mitsuki would find him creepy, especially considering the way he talks. But over time, she'd definitely grow to trust in him and appreciate his honesty. They'd probably date eventually, if they were given time to do so.

Epel Felmier ~ 4/10

Mitsuki would probably see Epel more as a brother. Their relationship is that of a familial bond.

Especially since they look so similar. Literally. Mitsuki would probably be mistaken as his actual biological sister. And there are plenty of ways in which they are similar, but enough differences to give them that sibling bond.

Overall, it would probably never get romantic. Even if it did, they'd both probably suppress it in the back of their minds.

🌐IGNIHYDE🌐

Idia Shroud ~ 5/10

⚠️BRIEF SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 6 IN THIS ONE (nothing too story-heavy). You have been warned.⚠️

This one... I honestly have no idea. Part of me says yes, and that it would be perfect, but the other part of me says they'd work better as friends.

For pros, Mitsuki enjoys rhythm games, and is extremely good at them. Her childhood best friends frequently took her to the arcade, so she's familiar with video games and their controls.

However, Mitsuki mostly plays video games for their stories (besides rhythm games) -- the same goes for anime. And all of the "games" he talked about in chapter 6? Most of them don't have "story" or "thought" put into them. They're brainless, and even the simple plot for the last Galaga-like game that he describes is, well... simple.

And these are the ones Idia LIKES. So she might have a hard time relating to him there. Overall, I don't know about this one (which is why it's in the middle).

Ortho Shroud ~ 0/10

No. Nope. Not happening.

That is all.

🟢DIASOMNIA🟢

⭕️Note! These ones are probably subject to change, especially since Chapter 7 isn't out yet in any version. <3

Malleus Draconia ~ 4/10

Interesting guy. Probably like Yuu, she would not understand why he is so feared, but Mitsuki would respect that he "has feelings too", and would try to invite him to things.

Mostly though, she doesn't know too much about him, so there's some distance. There'd probably be some mutual respect, but unless they suddenly decide to hang out more, nothing too interesting will happen.

And no, she doesn't find him "hot" (gasping sound effects).

Lilia Vanrouge ~ 9.5/10

Probably third place of all the boys. If we had place rankings, Azul would be first, then Vil, and then Lilia.

Lilia, despite not quite understanding modern human society, has a really good grasp on human life and what it means to live as a mortal. The "death cycle", so to speak.

Guess who's also experienced way too much death in their past? Mitsuki.

Mitsuki would also probably look up to him, especially with his war general past. Their common interest in music (and possibly gaming) would unite them together very quickly. Not only that, but Lilia can talk about non-mortal things to Mitsuki.

And she actually understands it. It doesn't just go through her head.

Also, she can cook. So.

Overall, this is the pairing of "two 'old' people who don't quite understand humanity yet. <3

Silver ~ 7/10

Mitsuki and Silver would definitely take naps together. No questions asked. His calm and more mellow nature is also soothing, and he can talk to animals?? Yes??

I don't have much more to say on this one, but it can definitely work.

Sebek Zigvolt ~ 2/10

Sebek is too... loud. And overbearing. And dramatic. Mitsuki worries and is cautious, but she knows when not to worry. Sebek worries TOO much, and often makes unreasonable statements and claims. She'd probably want to steer clear of him more than anything else.

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theabstruseanon · 2 years

Text

i don't usually post ever but since my wuvvy thoughts exploded last week here i am again but wuvvy wasn't really here this time but my god the revelations but i just find it interesting in a way i can't quite articulate the circumstances and differences of rue and hob's diverging views on service for others vs service for the self (and the apparent incompatibility of the two to exist at the same time) but (remembers that the read more feature exists)

like of course rue is so focused on the self because they've finally broken free from the service of others that while they were proud of their work itself, it was still overtly for the sake of acceptance, of fitting in, of conforming - to the point where it was breaking them in ways they didn't even realize until recently.

like i do agree overall with rue's frustration that hob only ever does things "for his court, as a soldier under their command" to the point where he will go against his own morals (up to this point more or less) but i also am with hob in his heartbreaking confusion about why rue "suddenly" doesn't seem to understand "acts of service" (which to hob is again, about showing love and care to those around you at its core, even if the love is misplaced and actually truly undeserved)

and for hob, his service for his court is also for acceptance and conformity and he also takes... idk if he takes pride in his work but there is a fulfilment to it for him but it ties so heavily into his need to please his superiors that it's so skewed. and during the argument even though i know that hob's dedication to his court is because his court is a) manipulative b) depriving of love, the fact that he himself holds the ideals of service to be so honourable and for communal sake that i couldn't help but still appreciate that part of him. like his court being shitty doesn't take away that he's sefless because at his core he cares about other people, and his actions with the other pcs shows that he is just a compassionate and caring person at his core, do u get what im saying (not me projecting all the anthropology communal vs individualistic cultures lens on their argument and feeling defensive on hob's behalf even though external forces are manipulative to him LMAOO)

(Edit: I'm coming back after reading more posts and everyone else seems to read hob's dedication as being only because he only sees himself as the blunt instrument and can't see outside of that and can't even understand that he has a choice and while I see what everyone's saying I am also seeing that I definitely read his dedication aspects differently LOL, as seen above cause most ppl pin his acts of service to only be a product of his station and lack of making choices for himself (so inherently negative and in the way of self-actualization) but not as many ppl mentioned that like. Again outside of external forces, acts of service is how hob shows love, care, community (so it's not acts of service themselves which are negatively affecting hob but rather in the way he is not appreciated and that this care is not reciprocated to the point where he hinges his entire identity on only that). Idk mb it's cause im chn and overthink communal vs individualism cultures when analyzing media LMAO)

but i also see again (as others have pointed out before) how deeply rue's own circumstances and perspective completely colour their actions and thoughts to a point where it almost seems like they aren't in a place rn where they can sort of... understand where others are coming from u feel? for me this was another extension of the kind of attitude rue had where they asked wuvvy what would make her happy but with that kind of assumption that her answer would align with their own based on their self-discoveries and finally figuring out what will make themselves happy (which is much deserved)

anyways i loved the confrontation/argument 10/10 made me actually invested in their relationship now that it's a proper trainwreck of clashing deeply held personal ideals, of course-- LSKDFJ

but also that quick wuvvy scene in the preview??? im dying im so scared for how wuvvy's arc will conclude i am so scared that wuvvy's motivations are going to just. flatten out to only being jealousy sdkljflsdkjf SOMEONE HOLD ME UNTIL THE FINALE

#acofaf spoilers #acofaf

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pbandjesse · 2 years

Text

I feel like such a huge bitch but I just want to be alone today. To much of today was people asking to much from me. And like. I can grin and bear it and not feel upset at them at all. That is fine with me. I like being helpful. But I also love being alone more. I closed all my windows and doors to the art building before the sun was even down. I don't want anyone coming in. I want to be quiet.

It wasn't even a bad day! Mostly it was very good! A little warm in the afternoon but overall I was comfortable. I didn't sleep super great last night. And that made me frustrated. I woke up around 1 and couldn't fall back asleep for an hour. And so when my alarm went off I felt pretty crummy.

But I pulled myself out of bed and tried my best to feel like a person. My outfit was cute and I was feeling pretty good all things considered.

I got all my project stuff set up. My theme boxes finished. And had a little breakfast. Food was not as hard today. It wasn't perfect, but it was better. Making my own breakfast is still ideal for me.

I really enjoyed all my groups today. And I was lucky with an easy day because the combined some groups. So I only had to be on for a few hours. Which was good because I started to not feel good mid morning.

It started with coughing when I took a deep breath. Which seems to have stopped, though I still feel funny in my throat. But the most concerning is I have bumps on the roof of my mouth and my tongue tingles. Like I'm having an allergic reaction to something but I have absolutely no idea what?? I would go to the nurse and she gave me Benadryl in case it got worse. Which it hasn't but it also hasn't gotten better. It's the weirdest thing and it have me a little concerned.

But we try our best to hold it together. I got a little frustrated with some adults but overall everyone was very helpful and excited to get to sew. This was a very successful project and I'm just so happy about that. Everyone has been so cute. This is for sure how I will do the sewing project in the future.

I finished the afternoon and just in time because my shoulders were absolutely on fire from working at the sewing machine. I would lay in my hammock for a long time. Though I did get up to help another councilor make a bear because she missed her group this morning. Not a problem at all. I want everyone to get to do it.

And once that was done I headed towards the pool to get a shower. I made a stop at the office to talk to Callie and then check in with Heather about a few supplies I needed. And the shower was actually hot today. Though a child came in the shower room and was like "hey!! We aren't supposed to shower!!" And I was like I am an adult I can shower. And then she wanted to know who I was and my name and I am like. I am in the shower haha. But it was fine. I was clean at least and got dressed before heading back up here.

Laura joined me and we laid in our hammocks. Chatting a bit. But mostly just scrolling on our phones. And then went to dinner. Which was much more enjoyable and I had three little tacos.

But then I just felt weird. And wanted to be alone. So I put my plate away and came up here to read and eat all my candy.

Josephine, Alexi's older daughter, came up for string and we chatted for a while. I was able to finish my book which I enjoyed a lot. And I have been texting Jess and James and enjoying my alone time.

I got theme ready for tomorrow. And now I am thinking I will have some crackers and take my final antibiotic and try to go to sleep. I hope tomorrow I feel better. I hope you feel great too.

Goodnight everyone. Take care of yourself.

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realhankmccoy · 2 years

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Female vs Male Millenbot

Thinking again on those gals from last night, female Millenbot should deffo be in charge. Even 25 yr old Millenbot with regular, cheap college degree from this area maybe 10x to 100x more capable than, say, American Millenbot with PhD or MBA verging upon Black 40.

The Millenbot males just throw a fit over gay men like me like a little boy bleeping 'problematic'... the things squeal and grind their gears. Their wheels are definitely busted (they go much fewer places), they work less, they play more, they are shockingly immature, full of classically pointless male hatreds, etc. Much like the men in the 1960s, they reject 'the system' only to fully replicate it on their own individual level, and then wonder why it doesn't work between them and the womens.

NowI will say this about female Millenbot -- very well-educated, but I do have some legs up, perhaps.

1. 'thinks for itself' 2. 'sees behind the veil' (that sort of Dorothy in Oz quality) 3. 'life experience' 4. 'grounded in the realities / processes and counterchecks one's own idealism'

...I'm not sayin' I'm better than them in any or all regards, overall, but I noticed a ton of flaws, for certain.

For example, female Millenbot knows Musk is a knob but doesn't realise Musk isn't a 'necessary knob' necessarily...it's like saying the circus won't go on without a carnival barker. Nor do they know the extent of Musk's evil. The details on precisely how manufacturing and product development take place... it's not all magic stuff that politics can explain away, you see.

Another example: obliviousness as to the West's meddling in Ukraine (Maidan 2013 didn't strike a chord), shock at how American police treatment or nuggets like how my brother shot out streetlights with a gun and nobody, even the parents, cared. Gasp and denial that Canada treats it's Native Americans worse than the USA. Even when I leavened this with how 'everything is better up there' (not exactly true) the European mind, never having done any research (I've read this info about Canada straight thru Harvard after curiouity and 9 trips to Canada)..., well, programmed bots just cannot easily believe certain truths. And I didn't even get to tell them about how Canada issued announcement during Trump saying all Latinos (aka Native Americans) would be unwelcome as refugees... it's clear who's 'let in' more Latinos when we look at the USA vs. Canada. Anyhow, with Europeans sometimes you fight through these things... and it's not even worth it to state facts if facts ruffle so many feathers, to me. Why should I have to do all the labour of thinking and observation and researching data when Millenbot operates at a level of chatter and conventional notions?

You also always get Millenbot of both genders in Europe cutting you off when you say your horror of the border crossing and saying 'no offence but if you were a black man you'd be dead'. No, Millenbot, to my knowledge border grossing people aren't shooting black international travellers. Hey, Millenbot, I don't need you to tell me Black Lives Matter... I am certain that being in America I've heard the news.

So, yes, put female Millenbot in charge and do it now. Bright young things exchanging information at warp speed. Complex things compared to the males, loaded with more information, peace, joy, heart and patience. The things function. The males ones don't, and externalise their failures and come up with red bleeps like 'Hank is to blame for me state and the world's state!' But you weren't happy with your state or the world before interacting with me, Millenbot, so grow way way up and stop being such a hater of gays... please.

What do I need to work on:

Formulating English out loud as I think things through in a sort of 'open the pondering' way. Like Camille Paglia, I like to just 'zip out the answer'... though I do like to balance my seesaws, I don't quite muse and chat in the same way

Speed of my circuitry

Cultural details at a tour guide level

Vibrancy

Faith

I guess that about covers it.

There is no need to hand female Millenbot a trophy because they have earned it and then some -- and wouldn't be interested in trophies. To cram all that info and socialisation into their brains night after night takes a lot of work.

What lovely socialisation skills, too. I will say I"m more gentlemanly than all but the 25 yr old, who was just a massive joy injection and wonderful at making you feel welcome. Now, what's that really worth when my circuitry is as slow and rusty compared to them as it is... but that's also a humble desire to avoid dominance of the conversation. I can get very zippy when the others have little or nothing to say. Their speed and socialisation adroitness outstripped my elderly gentleman ways, anyhow.

Congrats, female Millenbot. Nobody has pwned me in ages... I mean it's been years, not since I was in EastAsia and India. India was really the last time. Dominated by female Millenbot, although I don't think they see it that was, as committed egalitarians and equalists. But they certainly out-talked me, which I never see.

Now I feel like I gotta train like Rocky and try to get on their level, which is prob not within my grasp... but maybe it is?

Plus none of them were The Animation, for the most part. A touch of that in one.

After all, even if male Millenbot is a busted piece of shit -- not because women are to blame but because it simply did not put in the work having wonderful high speed convos with everyone and cramming infos into its brain online -- I am a male Millenbot and maybe a small micro-heroic way, I can help prove that male Millenbot isn't a total sack of narcissistic, simple stupid and aggressive garbage that bleeps 'problem! silence now! me better than you!' caveman shit at gays.

#millenbot

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hanibalistic · 5 months

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i have honestly been looking for ur blog for so long ur seriously one of the most talented writers i’ve ever seen… like im so serious rn you are AMAZING. and i know obviously i can’t convince someone how to feel about their own work (any artist can understand that) but i rlly want u to know that your writing back on jeonginks inspired me so much. even your small time stamps and drabbles really made me feel so happy and full of love!!! i think i was following that blog since like… levanter era which is insane to think about but after you disappeared i kept looking for your blog for so long and im so happy i found you because i love your writing so so so much you’re also a very sweet person and i look up to you a lot so thank you so so much for existing and writing, even if it’s not as much as before i think it’s good that you want to focus more on certain things rather than constantly putting out work. wow that was a long run on sentence, but seriously i am so happy to find you!

hello! thanks for leaving me a message. this is very sweet of you (♡˙︶˙♡) welcome back!

i am not entirely a hater of my own work, i won't say. some i definitely like more than others, but ultimately, i don't think i would have posted/kept something up if i truly didn't like it (except for the valentine trials). i do quite regret that i didn't save my time stamps. i feel i could have edited and reposted them (⇀‸↼‶) but it's alright. levanter... such a fun era, even though i forgot most of it. i was very young.

it's much easier for me the way i write fanfiction now. the worlds in my mind aren't that big but there are always a lot going on that sometimes a very long oneshot just isn't going to cut it ٩(๑`^´๑)۶ i really enjoy making world-building servers and just having world tags so i can just write whatever events of a specific universe and use the tag to contribute to the overall story. it's not ideal; not every reader wants to join random servers or keep up with that kind of inconsistency, but it's so much fun for me (╥﹏╥)

i am currently planning two oneshots, though. tumblr changing its post limits for paragraph breaks (?) gives me a chance to post in parts. i used to hate this (i kind of still do) but with the way i'm planning stories now, i think that might be a good thing. the felix work in progress has two story arcs. unless i post in parts, i'll never post it.

#anonie #reply #still thinking about 00line as bodyguards

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chronicparadoxx · 2 years

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When Is It My Turn?

My mother is getting married in less than a week. It's almost spur of the moment type of thing, but she's happy. I am happy for her. It got me thinking of my own life though. My relationships....my turn.

When is it my turn? Over the last two years of being single, I have met guy after guy chock full of mediocre potential. Even when I meet guys that are decent, they aren't for me. I have so many friends who have been in long-term relationships get out of those relationships and find their "Happily-ever- after".

...So, why not me?

The only guy who wants me at this moment is my child's father. I've come to realize that out of every guy I've ever dated, he is the most unkind individual I've ever been with. It's not that he's uncaring. He's rude, crass, and overall I cannot stand being around him for extended periods of time.

It just gets me thinking. I know I'm not hard to love. I know I'm not asking for much. So why haven't I found my match yet?

I need someone who's kind to me. Someone who knows how to backtrack conversations so I don't forget what I was talking about when we go off topic. I need someone who understands how to speak to me softly, and has the words to keep me at peace. I need someone who knows how to motivate me when I can't....and if I'm being picky...I want someone who's well off financially. I am tired of struggling monetarily. If I didn't "have" to work...that would be ideal.

I know I'm not hard to please. I know I'm not hard to love...

...but when it is my turn?

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oceansatedogs · 1 year

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unpopular opinion i guess?

but i feel like it isn't fair that denji has to raise nayuta fulltime by himself without ever having a single moment to just take care of himself. not to mention he probably doesn't get any financial support m and isn't allowed to work + has to go to school

like i AGREE denji's doing a phenomenal job @ raising nayuta, all things considered. and thematically, it's fitting for denji - the person who actually saw makima for what she was and decided to love her in the end, in spite of that - to be the one to care for her reincarnation

but also... he's just a kid himself. a really traumatized one. and honestly, both of them need to be adopted lol

i've been seeing so many takes praising their dynamic & denji's parenting but it's... not exactly ideal or fair, imo. this isn't to say nayuta wants to hurt denji or anything (she doesn't have a sense of the consequences of the things she does yet, because she's a kid just like him). it just feels like once again denji's digging a hole for himself. is he doing way better than he did before? of course. but he still seems conflict-avoidant and puts his loved ones before himself

(WHICH IS FINE, INHERENTLY. but in this context, he could learn to be more selfish. but being a teenage dad doesn't really let you do that. rip)

and understandably people are Not Having it with people calling nayuta abusive and i hope i don't come across that way when i say this, whether here or the tweets i made yesterday. LOL. nayu's not abusive. she's just... a spoiled brat. i'm happy she gets to be the things makima couldn't. but denji spoiled her way too much, and now this kid is way out of control😭😭 i do not blame nayuta for this. she IS the control devil. it's in her nature to be bossy. also she's like, 10-12

but the way i see it, denji's fallen into another dynamic where he has very little control of the situation no matter what he really wants:

caring for a child when he shouldn't have to and isn't ready to either

said child in question sometimes seem to burden denji because again. he is Not ready to be a parent

denji is falling into yet another passive role, though now more self-aware. which is, i think, something we all go through when we try to get better. it sucks denji isn't privileged enough to go to therapy or again, NOT have to care for someone else. because like i said, parenting is a huge responsibility that oftentimes means sacrificing your own needs for the wellbeing of the child

damn i hate how i can't say shit like this without having to over-explain that i am Not Calling The Child An Abuser. but i'm gonna be so real... nayuta's not really the "possessive little sister" i see some people saying she is. but she and denji aren't "the ideal sibling dynamic" either

in retrospect, comparing nayuta to a "helicopter parent" probably was an over-exaggeration of what's going on, but it really, really worries me seeing denji try to compromise (as he should), only for her to spit it back out in his face and basically say "because i said so" "it's for your own good"

because nayuta will not be a cute little child forever! and at the rate she's aging, she'll probably be around denji's age and older in a few more years. that behavior is cute now, but i promise it won't be so cute later🙃🙃

(i do agree with nayuta that getting close to asa is nothing but trouble for denji. but she needs to be taught how to communicate that instead of straight up getting the final say in the situation & not explaining why. because denji, she is like 12. follow your heart. yes, even if it's dangerous)

i just hope denji continues to get better at parenting and overall not assuming the passive role

#émile barks #just me ranting abt blorbos #i hope tjis makes sense and it's ok if you don't agree but man. Man that last chapter

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