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acourtofwhatthefuck · 1 year

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Fireleaf (Part Six)

Lucien Vanserra x Reader

Hiiii! Here's Part Six. Things are heating up! As always, I'm so, so grateful for all the help I get from @greeneyedivy...this chapter has been a long time in the making, and so much of her brilliant brain and time went into helping me with it! 🤣💋

Warnings: SMUT! 🌶️🌶️🌶️

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Russet eyes stared at the page, not wholly seeing the words.

The same page Lucien had been staring at for the past half an hour. He nibbled at the callused skin of his thumb, brows furrowing as he drank in the second paragraph. Again.

The tempered glow of moonlit skies

Sketched waltzes in his lover’s eyes

And no immortal heart did dance

The way his did, so thoroughly

He glared at the words. Breathed in. Out. And slammed the book shut.The Mother damn it. For once, he didn’t feel like reading. Didn’t feel like anything besides pummelling his fist into one of the nearby trees—

His eyes flickered up. Immediately found that tree, the dent in the bark and the faint smear of blood. He sighed at himself. Tried to rein his thoughts back in, away from straying in that — her — direction, again.

He didn’t know when he’d become so pathetic.

This wouldn’t do. Sitting and ruminating would not do. He’d managed to avoid running into her over the week that had passed since the masquerade; part of him wished he’d stayed in the Spring Court longer than one night. His thoughts were clearer there, the air not so tinged with…with fresh cotton and honeysuckle—

No. He pushed to his feet — kicked a smattering of leaves for good measure — and grabbed his book. Began to drag his feet back the way he’d come.

He could take the short route back, straight across the footpath — end up back inside the warmth of the estate quicker. But in the depths of the trees, the natural scents were stronger; most smells got buried beneath the aromas of pine and bark and earth, no matter how much those smells had shoved their way up Lucien’s nose and made a home there. So he stuck to the densest areas, nearer to the outskirts of the estate.

He heard them before he saw them.

Two pairs of feet, he thought. And Barric‘s voice — crisp and clear.

“One male has reportedly died,” His father’s advisor spoke quietly, gently. “Perhaps more — the fire hasn’t been contained yet.”

A soft, feminine noise came in response — one of distress — and Lucien knew, immediately, that the second pair of feet belonged to his mother. He frowned, not stopping to wonder why, in the damn Cauldron, his mother and Barric had sought such privacy to speak. He was already pushing through the brush, and beholding them where they’d stopped at a wide, towering tree.

“What’s this?” He demanded immediately.

The Lady of Autumn was the first to look up, her wide, brown eyes watery and her pale skin seeming ashen and wan. It made the stark red of her hair stand out even more.

Barric pivoted on the spot and studied Lucien. “You shouldn’t be snooping on conversations.”

Lucien cocked an eyebrow. “I’d hardly call a stroll through the trees snooping. What’s this about a fire?”

The Lady of Autumn wrapped her arms around her slender body; like she was trying to comfort herself. “The little hamlet an hour east — a fire broke out in the early hours of this morning. It seems as though it’s already ravaged half of the houses, and they can’t get it under control.”

Lucien felt his blood run cold. He knew that hamlet — had passed by it multiple times on his travels. A small community of the Lesser Fae lived there; good, hardworking people who didn’t have much to show for all their toil. And for the little they did have to be destroyed before their very eyes—

“We need to inform father,” He was ready, right then, to jump into action. To do…something. “We need to send aid right away. We can contain the fire with our magic, prevent any more loss of life—”

“Lucien.” His mother said softly. She was trembling, her hands shaking as she held herself. “Your father already knows.”

Barric nodded in confirmation. “He was informed. The decision has been made not to send aid.”

Lucien stopped dead. Stared between them. His mind was reeling too much, currently, to consider the anomalies right in front him. How unusual it was for Barric and his mother to be talking about this — and so privately, too. He felt anger flicker inside him as he drank in the timid sight of his mother. The set, unflinching sight of Barric — a male who was content with a decision made.

“Why the fuck not?” Lucien demanded. “If one person has already died—”

“The High Lord has decided not to get involved because the fire was started deliberately.” Barric said. “It’s said that there’s been some unrest throughout the area. Land disputes, or something. Your father is busy enough without having to involve himself in the petty squabbles between the Lesser Fae.”

And there it was. Lucien scoffed incredulously. Such blatant, cold disregard for the people the High Lord deemed beneath him, unworthy of him.

“Petty squabbles?” He gritted out between clenched teeth. “Their livelihoods are burning right before their eyes. They’ll need help. Our help.”

Barric didn’t so much as falter. “The High Lord’s decision is made.”

“Screw this.”

He turned, kicking through leaves and dirt, shoving through the thick brush. He’d kept quiet about his father’s prejudices for far too long, bitten his tongue too many times—

“Lucien.” His mother called behind him, soft, pleading. “What’re you going to do?”

“What he’s too much of a damn coward to do, mother.”

He didn’t give her a chance to call out one more word as he stormed through the trees and headed straight for his father’s office.

⤲

The two guards stationed outside his father’s office door were a sure indication of an important meeting being had inside.

Nox and Auster, their names were. Lucien knew most of his father’s staff by name — had grown particularly fond of these two, in fact. Good, honest young men.

Their faces were grave. Sallow. Nox’s in particular. A cold sheet of anger lay beneath the fear.

He’d grown up in that hamlet. Still had family living there.

“Is he in there?” Lucien nodded to the door, already knowing the answer.

Auster dipped his head. “He’s holding a meeting.” It seemed an effort for him to force out, “You know we can’t let you in.”

“You don’t need to let me. I’m his son.”

The fact that neither of the guards put up any real fight showed exactly how they were feeling right then — uncaring if Lucien did interrupt the High Lord’s meeting. Hopeful, in fact, that he would. He was the only Vanserra that had ever bothered to strike up conversation with them, to get to know them and ask questions. The anger they saw in his eyes, right then, was identical to their own.

They weren’t going to stop him from storming in there. Not really.

And they didn’t, as Lucien flung the door open, causing Beron to falter mid-sentence.

He sat at his desk — and in front of him, Lucien’s four brothers were each perched, listening to their father speak as though none of them had a damn care in the world.

Lucien didn’t care that he hadn’t been invited to whatever this meeting was. Didn’t care that his four brothers had turned in their seats to stare at him. He didn’t bother to glimpse Dion’s concerned expression, or Eris’s inquisitive one, or the glimmering flash of excitement on Jareth’s and Rian’s faces, like they eagerly anticipated a showdown.

He merely stepped into the room. Clenched his jaw and ground out, “Why aren’t you sending aid to the hamlet that is burning down as we speak?”

Beron’s dull eyes were liquid ire as he beheld his youngest son. “You’ve no right to burst in here—”

“Why. Aren’t. You. Sending. Aid.”

“Why should I?” The High Lord shrugged. “Why should I expend my resources and my staff and reward people for acting like brutes?”

“Saving lives is not rewarding people.” Lucien snapped. “They’ll be losing everything right now whilst you sit on your ass—”

“I urge you to watch your tone.” Beron’s voice rose. “If the common folk are unable to behave in a civilised manner, I refuse to get involved. They can sort it amongst themselves.”

The brutality — the utter malice of it…it damn near winded Lucien. Damn near choked the words from his throat. He’d always known that his father was a ruthless, spineless bastard, but to be so uncaring…

“There are children that live in those homes.” Lucien spat. “Innocent children.”

Beron sat back. So casual. So unbothered. “Well. Perhaps the brutes should have considered that before they decided to raze those homes to the ground. Are you done?”

Lucien’s eyes shot to Dion — the one brother he’d always had a quiet respect for. The one who had always seemed to care. “And you’re alright with this?”

Dion’s eyes seemed to flash with…something. But he merely swallowed. Inclined his head. “Father has made his decision.”

Lucien couldn’t…couldn’t stay in this office, this estate, any longer. Not without tearing the whole place apart. He turned on his feet, shaking with rage.

Beron merely called after him. “I’ll hear no more said on the matter, Lucien.”

Lucien didn’t bother with a response – because that was fine. He didn’t want to say anymore, either. He wanted to do – to act.

Whether his pathetic excuse for a father liked it or not.

⤲

He was halfway to the stables when he heard his name being called. He turned, finding both Nox and Auster hot on his trail.

“Don’t even bother to try and stop me.” He gritted his teeth at the two guards. “I respect both of you, and I don’t want to fight—”

“We’re not stopping you.” Nox fell into step with him. “We’re helping.”

Lucien stilled for just a moment. Stared between them. To not only abandon their posts, but to go against their High Lord’s word— “You’ll get into trouble.”

Auster shrugged, his expression fierce. “Then so be it. We trained as Guards with an intrinsic reflex to protect. That doesn’t discriminate. Even if you just need us to stand guard while you help…”

So sad, that the two of them had shown more courage in ten minutes than he’d ever seen from his father, his brothers, in his whole life. Lucien didn’t know why he was still surprised; he’d learned long ago that he, for some reason, seemed to be cut from a different cloth to the other males of his family.

He dipped his chin and nodded. “I’m going to contain the fire with my magic. I’ll need both of you helping with getting people out. With any potential injuries.”

The admiration — and gratitude — that shone in Nox’s eyes was almost too palpable for Lucien to look at. He was one of the newer guards, less hardened by years around brutality. And these were his people that Lucien was putting his neck on the line to save.

“Let’s go.” Lucien squeezed his shoulder. “We’ll do what we can.”

The three of them were nothing but steeled determination as they tore into the barn, damn near startling the stableboys out of their skin. There was no time for his usual pleasantries as Lucien readied his horse. Too much going inside his head. Too much to focus on.

Perhaps that was why, as they mounted their horses and set off like a brisk, relentless gust of wind, he didn’t notice that Dion’s horse was already gone.

⤲

The smell tinged the air from what felt like miles away. Smoke and heat and…something else. Pungent enough to sting all three of their noses. As they grew closer, thick, black smoke billowed up into the sky and shrouded above them like great, winged creatures.

Lucien dreaded considering what the sight of it might be like…such a tiny, modest area engulfed by flames. But they kept the horses galloping and schooled themselves into the calm they needed to face it.

There was no moving fast enough, every movement feeling sluggish as he considered how many more lives may have been lost, how much had already been destroyed. When the hamlet came into view, it was an effort not to stop and gape.

Half of it had been ravaged already. Cracking and popping and shouting rang through the air, and what had once been a home to a small community of hardworking people had been reduced to…to pure chaos. So many people running around, carrying children away from the danger, trying to move the injured, hauling buckets of water back and forth.

Lucien dismounted his horse. Tried to gather his thoughts. Nox and Auster followed suit.

“I need to get straight to the fire and stifle it with my magic,” He turned to the two guards. “Check in with the locals. Find out how many injured we have. And if there’s a healer on site.”

Nox nodded — but Auster was frowning. Frowning over Lucien’s shoulder, as though he couldn’t quite believe what he was seeing.

Lucien clasped his shoulder. “I know it’s awful. But we need to keep our heads clear and—”

“That’s…” Auster peered past him. “…Is that Lady Y/N?”

Lucien whipped round so fast, he lost his footing.

His heart thudded an erratic tune as he took in the sight before him. And sure enough — there she was.

Dressed in a loose shirt and breeches, her hair ripping out of an untidy bun at the nape of her neck, she was coated in soot and sweat, her mouth barking stark demands at people as she hauled buckets of water back and forth. She didn’t hesitate – not even slightly – to charge towards the burning buildings, just about managing to keep the water contained in the bucket.

Lucien found himself running after her. Didn’t glance back at Nox or Auster even once as he raced in her direction. She was already disappearing out of sight, and he…his breath hitched as he pushed his legs faster, trying not to run straight into fleeing residents as he searched for where she’d dipped around the side of a building.

He reached the building just as she re-emerged – the bucket now empty – and ran straight into him. Her eyes were so wild, so panicked, that she didn’t seem to realise what she was seeing straight away.

That he, too, had gone against the grain – had decided to come here and help.

Panic was a surprising, feral thing inside of him. He found himself studying her, checking for burns, for anything untoward.

“What in the Cauldron are you doing here?” He blurted, the words emerging from him far angrier than he’d meant. “Are you out of your gods-damn mind?”

She seemed to blink – just for a second. And then she was sidestepping him, using her forearm to wipe sweat from her brow as she hefted the bucket beneath the other arm. “What does it look like I’m doing, Lucien? I’m helping to put out this damned fire!”

Her voice was croaky, raspy; Lucien wasn’t sure whether that was from shouting at the top of her lungs or coughing around the billowing smoke. She continued past him, and he was hot on her trail, making a grab for her arm.

“It’s dangerous.” He snarled.

“Get off your fucking high-horse,” She snapped, ripping away, “And grab a bucket, would you?”

She fell into a run, panting and glistening with sweat as she headed back towards the water pump at the top of the street. And Lucien…Lucien was trying to force his brain to work. Trying to tear his gaze from her. To stifle the bleating panic that was rising in him, urging him to grab her and get her far away from the danger.

He didn’t follow her. He pivoted on the spot, grimacing at the heat that breathed out at him. It seemed to speak to his fire magic, to coax him towards it, like calling to like. He didn’t need buckets of water to contain the flames ravaging the buildings. With one flicker of his magic, entirely self-taught, he could stifle them as easily as he could summon them. He zipped past the building, right towards the heart of the inferno–

“No!”

There were footsteps, a clattering sound – and arms were looping around his waist; arms that felt dainty against the broad expanse of his muscles. But they may as well have been an ironclad grip with the force with which they managed to move him, like he was no more than a light breeze. He was yanked backwards, and he just about managed to glimpse a discarded bucket of water spilling onto the street, and Y/N attempting to keep them both upright as he faltered and fell into her, the breath immediately being knocked out of her.

“Faebane,” She gasped, attempting to move from beneath him. She coughed, her voice sounding even more raw as she managed to choke out, “The fire is infused with Faebane. You can’t…you can’t use magic. Need water.”

“Fuck.” He hissed, hauling himself off of her. He yanked her up in one fluid motion, concerned eyes flicking over her.

So many things were warring in his mind. The first – to get the water; as much of it as possible. But Faebane…that had been the underlying scent mixed up in the smoke and ash that stung the air. He’d not identified it at the time, but…it seemed obvious, now. Its stark, cloying smell.

But not just anybody had Faebane. Certainly not the members of a Lesser Fae community who had zero power and barely two coins to rub together. The chemical was hard to come by, unless you were somebody untouchable. Somebody who could get what they wanted with a few sharp words.

Somebody knowledgeable enough to know that it rendered a person’s powers useless. Rendered them unable to quickly put out a fire before it caused too much destruction.

He shook his head. Tried to block the thoughts out. He couldn’t stand and speculate right now, not with him unable to use magic to help. It’d have to be the longer, harder way.

He was still holding onto her as he grabbed for the bucket and hurried to the water pump. Still gripping onto her hand.

He didn’t know why.

⤲

It was perhaps the most civil they’d ever been with each other.

There was no choice to be anything but as they worked together, hauling bucket after bucket back and forth, dousing the flames in water, helping trapped residents to freedom. Without the help of Lucien’s magic, hours passed by of the two of them working side-by-side, joined by Nox, Auster and the gathering of the hamlet’s residents who took orders and did whatever was needed of them. Day dwindled into evening, taking the light with it — along with their energy, their strength.

The sky was nearly darkened by the time only smouldering cinders remained. The smell in the air was still pungent — the Faebane seeming to be the strongest odour. And aside from the hissing that the burnt, sodden wood gave off, and the low murmur of bleak conversation between the owners of those homes…a heavy, eerie stillness settled through the hamlet that felt like a potent silence.

Lucien collapsed against one of the untouched buildings, scrubbing his hands over his face. He stared through tired eyes at the chaos that lay before them; the blackened, ashy remains of buildings and the smoke that still snaked out of them like shadows. The only mercy was that there were no more lives lost — a small glimmer of positivity that barely held up against the hammering of his weariness. Not just physical exhaustion, but…mental, too. There were a lot of things he needed to work through. A lot of things hammering his brain.

He didn’t like the panic he’d felt — panic over one person in particular. That panic couldn’t mean anything good.

That first glimpse of her earlier that day…when he’d seen her hauling the buckets of water and running towards the threat…he didn’t know how he hadn’t gone to his knees. Didn’t know that he was capable of such…cold anxiety spreading through him.

Even now, his gaze flicked over his surroundings in search of her — even though he was well aware that she was helping the healer with the injured in the inn at the top of the street. He still felt that itchy restlessness to make sure she was unharmed, that she wasn’t forgoing medical treatment that she may need, in favour of helping somebody else. Because she would — she absolutely would. He didn’t know why he hadn’t realised it sooner.

His eyes darted to Nox. Nox, who had shown an unflinching bravery in the face of such terror; something that Beron Vanserra had never done. Auster was currently standing over him, tending to a burn on his arm, and Lucien…Lucien understood the contained worry in Auster’s eyes. The panic over a realisation that it could have been far, far worse. Such a relief, that Nox’s entire family had gotten out safe.

He couldn’t stop himself watching as Auster clasped Nox’s face between his hands and pressed their foreheads together, his worried eyes fluttering shut. Couldn’t stop himself from watching the soft, gentle kiss that the two guards shared; the physical reassurance they needed from each other that they were both okay.

Lucien found his hands clenching at his sides. Like…like he needed that reassuring touch. Needed to know that she was absolutely—

“There would have been further casualties if you’d not come.” An exhausted voice ripped him from his thoughts. The male that stood before Lucien looked as though he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. He bowed his head. “You and the lady, and your guards. We cannot thank you enough.”

He’d been one of the residents that had taken orders and worked alongside them, even as the weight of exhaustion began to drag him down. One of the good, hardworking people that the High Lord looked down upon.

Lucien dipped his chin. “I only wish I could have come sooner.” He shook his head. “Is there any idea as to who would do this?”

The male’s eyes shot to the ground. “…I wouldn’t like to speculate…”

Something about his tone made Lucien bristle. He watched him — the clear indication that this was far bigger than land disputes, as Beron had claimed. “What is it?”

“…There was some…unrest…being rallied by the locals, after the Harvest Festival. People who didn’t appreciate your father’s…dismissal, of their hard work. There was a discussion of riots, and…well, it’s probably unrelated, but…”

But he didn’t need to finish the thought. Because Lucien wouldn’t put it past his father, for one second, to punish people for even thinking about revolting against him. His father, who Lucien knew had a hidden cache of Faebane.

Beron had probably known all along that Lucien would defy him and help those in need. Had probably wielded the Faebane to ensure that Lucien would be unable to quickly put the fires out — unable to limit the damage.

He felt himself go cold under his sweat-coated skin. Felt sickness unfurling inside of him—

But movement lurked in his periphery, and he looked up to find Y/N approaching. She looked just as downtrodden and exhausted as Lucien felt — worse, probably. She wrapped her arms around herself…as though she was trying to hold herself together.

“The healer has things under control.” She rasped, glancing between Lucien and the male. “What do we do now?”

“We—”

Every last one of them was too exhausted, too distracted — too done-in to sense the threat before an awful creaking sound broke through the night, of splintering, breaking wood.

Lucien wasn’t even thinking. He didn’t recall giving his body any direction before he was launching himself into Y/N and knocking her to the ground. The two of them rolled out of the way just as a wooden beam broke from a scorched building, falling right to the spot in which Y/N had stood seconds before.

She groaned — or maybe it was him — and he allowed his body to shield hers for a moment longer, just to check the coast was clear, before he hauled her up with him. Set her on her feet. Checked her over. Apart from having the air knocked right out her, and a streak of blood on her arm that may or may not have been hers, she seemed to be otherwise alright. Still, Lucien held her up.

She just stared at him. Swallowed. Wanted to thank him, to say…something—

“You’ve done quite enough.” The male behind them tore his weary gaze from the fallen beam, long enough to face them. “We can handle it from here — you need to rest. All of you.”

“I can stay.” Y/N stepped past Lucien. “Just tell me what you need, and—”

“Lady,” Boldy — so, so boldly, more than he ever would have dared before — the male grasped her hand in his own, “We’re grateful for your kindness. But the last thing we need is any of you collapsing from exhaustion. You’ve done more than we possibly could have asked. Rest.”

Y/N glanced up at the sky, dark and filling with stars above her. The prospect of washing the grit and grime off of her, of collapsing into bed…she almost went to her knees then and there. But to face the long journey home…what awaited her at home—

The male seemed to read that very thought on her face. “My lodgings are about two miles down the road. I’m staying here to help, but…by all means, the four of you are welcome to spend the night there. It’s the least I can offer you.”

She almost sagged with relief. Two miles — she could handle two miles. Probably.

Lucien stepped up beside her, dipping his chin. “Thank you. For your generosity.”

And the male’s eyes, as he met those of the youngest Vanserra, were entirely unguarded. Every grateful, admiring thought shone earnestly in them, and Y/N knew what he was thinking in that moment — that Lucien had behaved like a true High Lord.

“No, Lucien.” He inclined his head. “Thank you.”

⤲

The four of them turned out to be the two of them.

Nox and Auster insisted on staying, on securing any more buildings threatening collapse. And after, they’d said, they would return to the Vanserra Estate, no matter the hour. They wanted to face Beron’s wrath head-on.

And so it was just Lucien and Y/N alone who travelled the two miles silently on horseback, not even sharing a glance as they kept an eye out for the male’s lodgings.

The lodgings, it turned out, was a gamekeeper’s cottage tucked into the forest that outlined the sprawling landscape. Certainly private and secluded. Certainly a place for them to rest.

But a strange sting of tension had bloomed between them on their silent journey. Y/N could feel Lucien’s heavy, pressing gazes. Like he was trying to stop himself from saying something. How tightly he clutched at his horse’s reins, his knuckles turning white, was indication enough that he was biting his tongue. Gone, clearly, was the solidarity they’d shared during the day.

They didn’t utter a word as they secured the horses outside the cottage and traipsed inside. But both shared the same thought as they stopped, studying their home for the night.

It was…small. The barest necessities, Lucien supposed, for what a gamekeeper might need. One open-plan area with a bed, an armchair, a basic kitchenette and a fire. He could only assume that the one other door to his left led to a cramped bathing room.

“I’ll sleep in the armchair.” Lucien said tersely, before Y/N could speak. “You can have the bed.”

There was no room for arguing — that much was obvious, as she studied the way he avoided her gaze. He brushed past her, tying his hair back as he went.

“I’ll get the fire going.” He murmured.

She knew he was merely thinking aloud — not really talking to her — but she nodded, all the same. And found her eyes lingering on him, watching him, as he knelt before the hearth. It took her a moment to rip her eyes away.

She cleared her throat, striding over to the kitchenette and quietly muttering, “I’m thirsty.”

Lucien didn’t deign to respond. He poured every morsel of his concentration — what was left of it — into getting the fire going. Even though he wanted to snuff it straight back out — even though he’d seen enough fire, in one day, to last him a lifetime. It was far too cold a night for them to forego the heat it offered.

Only when it was breathing warmth into the room did he stand. He turned, eyes immediately landing on Y/N.

She stood at the sink, seeming deep in thought as she scrubbed her hands clean. Lucien could only stop. Stare.

There was blood on her arm — hers or somebody else’s, Lucien didn’t know; he felt his stomach twist, felt a deep impulse to stride over and inspect it. But he rooted his feet to the floor. Waited for her to finish. Why…he didn’t know.

He didn’t know anything, right then. Like why he couldn’t stop his eyes from travelling every inch of her. Her dirtied, crumpled clothing and her hunched shoulders. Her hair had come completely loose from the bun she’d thrown it into, once again falling around her face and forming a curtain that hid her expression. Still, Lucien stared.

He could feel it — the urge to stride over and brush that hair away. That hair that always looked so silken, so soft, be it tied up neatly or flowing about her shoulders. He’d found his eyes lingering on that hair one too many times. Found them lingering now.

And there was that tiny, little braid again — every damn day, she wore one single braid in her hair, no matter the style she’d opted for. He didn’t know why. He’d noticed it before — multiple times — namely when she’d helped him from the ground after their sword fight, when her hair had swayed towards him and pushed her honeysuckle scent to him. That single braid had dangled down, and he’d wondered what the little decoration would feel like between his fingers. How soft it might be as he fisted her hair in his hand whilst she panted into his mouth, his hips—

She swivelled to face him. Lucien blinked out of his thoughts, praying that the nature of them didn’t leave a dusting of pink on his skin. If the change in his scent was obvious…

She pressed her back against the wall. Stared at him. He stared back.

“Well?” She shrugged. “Out with it.”

Her tone was…strained. Confrontational. Had she sensed Lucien looking at her? Sensed, maybe, the direction of his thoughts?

His jaw ticked as he ground out, “What.”

“Whatever it is you’re dying to say.” Her arms folded across her chest. Wrapped around herself again — she seemed to do that a lot; a comfort mechanism. “You glared at me practically the whole way here. Pray, tell, what have I done now?”

He had glared at her. And she’d noticed. But hadn’t discerned that his tension, his ire, was made up entirely of concern. Worry. Panic.

His eyes darted to her arm. “You’re hurt.”

“I caught it on a piece of jutting wood.” She clasped a hand over the wound. “I’ll live.”

Gods, she was so fucking infuriating. So damn oblivious to what was at stake, what lay at her feet. Reckless and careless and stupid.

“If that’s all, I’m going to bed—”

“Why didn’t you come find me?” Lucien blurted. “When you learned of the fire. Why didn’t you come and ask for help instead of running off on your own?”

She blinked at him, her mouth falling slightly open. Pure incredulity showed on her face as she looked him up and down, and barked a humourless laugh.

“Why should I come and find you?” She demanded. “I did ask for help. I asked Dion, and he refused to go against your father’s word, so I took it into my own hands.”

Lucien clenched his teeth so hard, it was a wonder they didn’t break. He hated every damn bit of her response. The way she referred to him — merely as you, as though he was nothing. Dion’s gods-damn name on her tongue. Her recklessness—

“Even if nobody else would help,” He spat. “Surely you would have known that I—”

“Known what, Lucien?” She interrupted. “Known that you’re a good, noble male who would have dropped everything to offer your aid? You’ve been nothing but an asshole to me.”

“I—”

“No one at that gods-damn estate listens to me. I’ve been nothing but suffocated since I got there. And not by my own choosing, I might add.”

True. She was speaking such truth, and yet Lucien couldn’t bear to acknowledge it. Couldn’t bear to acknowledge that perhaps he’d got things so, so wrong. It was far easier to become the sneering asshole that she’d pegged him as.

And he did just that.

“You don’t seem,” he snarled, striding over to her, “to be complaining much about the luxuries my family’s estate affords you. You’ve had no problem embracing them.”

“See, there it is again!” She snapped back. “You know nothing about me, because you haven’t even deigned to step out of your privileged viewpoint and consider that we don’t all have the freedom of choice, Lucien. I was brought here as nothing more than a damn bargaining chip! I don’t have the freedom to speak my own mind, or to take a walk throughout the woods without an escort, or do anything I want to do, because from the moment I arrived at that fucking estate, my freedom was taken from me!”

Lucien had fallen so preternaturally still. He blinked at her, utterly stunned. Her words sinking in—

“Your assumptions about me have been entirely wrong and I’m sick of it,” She continued, shaking with her anger, her hands balling, “You assume I’m the privileged, stuck-up one. But you? You have it far easier. I don’t have the option to go and fuck someone against a bloody tree in the orchard or to be consumed by the passion, because the next person I’ll have to let touch me is your bro—”

Lucien struck.

He couldn’t stomach it. Couldn’t bear even the idea of anyone but him touching her. Couldn’t stand the thought of anyone tasting her the way he…the way he wanted to. He needed rid of that thought, to banish it—

He was nothing but pure, carnal need embodied as he grabbed her face between his hands and kissed her.

His lips slanted over hers, and he felt her gasp against him. That first taste of her threatened to undo him then and there. He’d thought about this taste, wondered about it. Fisted his cock and spilled all over his stomach as he imagined it — more than once. He groaned against her lips.

He wanted to taste her all over, to devour her—

She gripped onto his wrists. Pulled away. Blinked up at him. He blinked back.

Neither said a word. Their heavy breaths filled the space, and they stared at each other, wide-eyed. Lucien’s eyes fell to her lips once more. Hers fell to his.

They both surged forward again at the same, their mouths meeting once more.

⤲

It was a harder kiss, more brutal, a heady meeting of lips and teeth.

Lucien gripped onto you so hard, you knew — hoped — it would bruise. His hands fastened on your waist as he shoved you against the wall, pinned you there with his own hips, and slid his tongue into your mouth.

It wrapped around yours, teased the roof of your mouth, and your tastes invaded each other. You wanted this. Wanted him. Had wanted him from the first moment you’d seen him reading poems and sonnets beneath a tree. No taste would ever, ever be enough.

You bit down on his lip, fisting your hand in the loose ponytail his hair was tied into. You tugged, tugged hard, and Lucien groaned.

“You drive me mad,” He growled, his hands roaming your body. “Always, always on my mind.”

The words sent a thrill through you, but you didn’t stop to consider them. What they meant.

“Show me,” You gasped, kissing him hard. And said again, “Show me.”

You knew — and so did he — that there was no amount of restraint that existed to make him refuse. A delicious snarl ripped from his throat, sounding more animal than man, and his hands found their way to your breeches.

Too many buttons, too many laces. Pure, feral noises sounded from deep in his chest as he gripped the front of your breeches and tore them apart with his hands, the brutal action in itself causing wetness to pool between your legs. He shoved them to your feet, yanked your undergarments down, and then he was slanting his lips over yours again. His nostrils flared as your scent hit him.

“I need to be inside you.” His voice was guttural. “Now.”

“Yes.” Was all you managed to gasp out. “Yes.”

You were aware, as his mouth coasted your jaw, your neck, of the sound of his belt hitting the floor. He breathed heavily, his hands moving between you. And then he shoved his breeches down.

His cock sprang free, and there was no chance for you to so much as look as it as he gripped his length in his hand. Used the other to heft one of your legs up, around his waist.

You felt the head of his cock brush through your wetness. Felt it tease your entrance. You gripped his shoulders.

And then he was pushing into you.

The slight pinch of pain was delicious, incredible, as he thrust in. A moan fell from your lips as he filled you, and he swallowed it with a kiss, his lips once again finding yours.

He pulled out to the tip. Slammed back in to the hilt.

And then unleashed himself on you.

There was nothing slow or gentle about it. Not as he thrust and thrust and thrust into you, skin slapping skin, your breaths and moans the only sounds filling the space, alongside the relentless thud, thud, thud of your back hitting the wall.

Lucien tore his lips from yours, burying his face in the crook of your neck. A deep groan came from him as he reached up and grabbed your breast.

“Oh gods,” He gasped, squeezing hard. “Why does it feel like this? Feels too good, I can’t…”

Words failed him — and failed you, too. But words were unnecessary as your uncontrolled moans took over, your head falling back. Your fingernails dug into his shoulders, his back, and you knew you would leave marks as you gave over to the sensations in your body. As you became his pleasure, and he became yours.

“Fuck,” You manage to bite out. “Oh, gods.”

Never had you felt so damn good. His thrusts, somehow, picked up, the noises he emitted becoming deeper, gruffer, as he hit that sweet spot inside you. You could feel yourself clenching around him, feel yourself about to come undone completely.

And when he reached down and pressed his thumb to your clit once, you lost it.

Your scream caught in your throat as released barrelled through you, and you clenched around his cock hard. Lucien grunted, thrusting those capable hips again, again, again — and then he was following you straight into that release. Spilling inside you.

The feel of him, the warmth of him inside you…you couldn’t bear it. You went utterly weak against him, your gasped moans trailing off into soft, staggered noises.

Lucien had stilled against you. He didn’t move, his body still pressed to yours as his breaths slowly evened out.

And then he pulled his hand from your breast. Slid out of you. Stepped back.

He blinked at you. Studied you all over, like…like he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Couldn’t believe what he’d just done.

He swallowed, russet eyes looking utterly shell shocked as he leaned down and yanked his breeches up. You’d never seen his golden skin so pale. Never seen him tremble like he did now, as he fastened the buttons on his breeches.

You needed to speak, to say something — anything. You opened your mouth—

Lucien turned on the spot — turned away from you. His shoulders were hunched as he stalked to the door.

He didn’t look back as he stepped out. As he left the cottage, left you alone, the door slamming behind him.

All you could do was stare at the door. Gape. You were still pressed against the wall, your trousers and underwear pooled at your feet. Your body still trembling. Lucien’s seed dripping out of you, down your legs.

You blinked. Touch your fingers to your lips. Your legs shook as you slowly pushed off the wall and pulled your breeches back up.

You couldn’t…you’d just fucked Lucien Vanserra.

Not the Vanserra you were marrying.

An iciness settled inside you as you moved towards the bed. It felt like wading through mud, pushing your body to co-operate.

You collapsed down onto the mattress. Blinked up at the ceiling. The silence was deafening.

Lucien had fucked you and left.

You’d had sex with Dion’s brother.

You couldn’t bear it…couldn’t allow one more thought to pass through your head. The day had been too much, too pressing.

You’d swapped a good deed with a terrible one.

A terrible one that had felt so, so brilliant.

You rolled over, burying your face into the pillow. And you wept.

⤲

You didn’t sleep, and Lucien didn’t return.

Where he’d spent the night, you had no clue. You tried not to think about it as you rose early the next morning and climbed straight into the bathtub. You’d scrubbed your skin until it was red-raw, smothering Lucien’s scent with so much soap, you were sore afterwards.

When you stepped out of the front door, his horse was gone. Just Dion’s horse — the one you’d taken — waited. Waited for you.

You were exhausted. Haggard. But you didn’t want to linger there a moment longer. Didn’t want to glance back at the wall that you’d been slammed against as Lucien thrust into you—

No. You needed to forget. To send it far, far from your mind.

And so you set off. Away from the gamekeeper’s cottage. Past the ruined remains of the hamlet. Your surroundings were nothing but a blur as you rode, only just keeping your wits about you enough to travel in the right direction. Back to the Vanserra Estate.

You felt…empty. Hollow. Exhausted.

Perhaps that was why you didn’t so much as flinch at the sight of the Vanserra manor. You knew Beron’s wrath awaited you inside, and yet you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

You returned Dion’s horse to the stables. Scarcely managed a greeting to the staff you passed as you traipsed to the front door with heavy feet.

Dion was waiting for you at the top of the stone steps.

He was tense. Guarded. But his eyes swept over you once, and whatever he saw seemed to soften him slightly.

“You’re back.” He said, watching you carefully as you approached him. “I was getting worried…”

“It was too late to travel back, by the time the fires were out.” You didn’t recognise your own voice. “I take it your father wants to speak with me?”

Dion nodded, somewhat apologetically. “He does. I’ll come with you.”

“I don’t need a bodyguard.”

You brushed past him, into the house. He was hot on your trail as he fell into step with you and took your arm.

“I understand why you’re angry with me.” He lowered his voice, lest the servants hear. “But I couldn’t go against my father’s word.”

You stared forward. “Those people needed help, Dion.”

“I know. I know they did.”

You didn’t offer him another word as he led you through the manor. No sign of Lucien anywhere. You wondered if he’d returned, or if he was still out on the road—

You shook the thoughts from your head as you came to Beron’s office. You knocked once.

“Come in.” He said immediately, like he was expecting you right then.

You pushed into the room, Dion following you inside. He shut the door behind him, pressed his back against it.

You turned to Beron. Couldn’t muster anything but indifference onto your face.

He sat at his desk, wearing an expression of pure ice. His eyes flicked over you, a sneer curling his lip. You knew you must have looked awful.

You opened your mouth — to say what, you didn’t know. But he slammed his hand down on the desk, hard enough for it to jolt. You flinched.

“Do you have anything you’d like to say?” He hissed.

You stared at him with vacant eyes. Found yourself shrugging. “I like your paperweight.”

Behind you, Dion emitted a vague noise of distress. And Beron…Beron rose from his seat. Clenched the edges of his desk so hard, his knuckles turned white.

“Do you think it’s a joke,” he hissed, “to undermine me?”

You lowered your gaze to the floor. “Not a joke, no. But I did deem it necessary.”

“I am your High Lord. What I say is what goes.”

“You are their High Lord, also. Those people who just lost everything. They needed your help—”

“How dare you deign to tell me how I should run my own court? Do you truly believe I’ll take orders from a silly little girl?”

“I—”

“Father,” Dion cut in softly, gently. He came to stand beside you, lightly touching your arm. “Y/N didn’t mean anything by it. I don’t believe she meant any harm. She wouldn’t have realised she was doing anything wrong.”

You wanted to turn on him — on both of them — and argue that you knew full fucking well what you were doing, and none of it was wrong. But Dion met your eyes with a fierce look, a subtle shake of his head. And then Beron was stepping around the desk. Stalking slowly towards you.

You watched. Watched every one the High Lord’s movements as he stopped before you. Inches away.

His eyes were shards of ice as they stared down at you. His jaw clenched.

“You are the daughter of a good friend of mine.” He said quietly, dangerously. “And I do not wish to cause upset between our families. But let me make something very clear to you.”

You lifted your chin. Met his gaze. He hated every second of it.

“You are walking a very fine line, girl.” He murmured. “I’m willing to overlook this incident as an innocent error of judgement. But I will be watching you. And if you ever, ever undermine me or disrespect me again? I’ll make sure you regret it.” His eyes flicked over you. “Are we clear?”

You didn’t want to respond; didn’t want to give him the satisfaction. Your shoulders hunched, and you knew Dion was holding his breath beside you.

“Are we clear?” Beron snapped.

Dion nudged your arm with his own. A warning.

“Yes, High Lord.” You gritted out. “We’re clear.”

Beron appraised you again, disgust muddying his eyes. “Good. Now get out of my sight.”

Before you could say anything, land yourself in any more shit, Dion was gripping your arm and dragging you from the room. He shut the door behind him, turning to face you.

You didn’t care to hear a word he had to say — not right then. You were too mad, too disgusted — with him, with yourself, with Beron. If you didn’t walk away right now, you would lose it.

“Y/N.” He said, but you were already turning your back on him.

“I want to be alone, Dion.” You shot back. Every bit of your exhaustion showed in your voice.

Perhaps that was why he didn’t say another word as you walked away from him, and went to succumb to another onslaught of tears in your suite.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 1 year

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Hello🤗! It's the anon who has a geeky mom!

Made it through chapter 5 and here's my Mama's thoughts. Warning: she cried A LOT.

She's kind off curious about Mickey and wondered if he could be important in the future. She got upset when no one knew who he was lol. "Mickey Mouse was my childhood! How could they?!" She cried. She also got really worried for Yuu and the Overblots. She's surprisingly quick to guess that Vil was about to overblot because of the epilogue from last chapter.

She was excited that the school held festivals because her school did that.

My mom screamed when she saw Riddle and Kalim again. She wanted to know if Riddle was able to get through with his mom. I should mention she wants to adopt the overblot victims.

She kept on roasting Vil throughout the chapter, especially whenever he acted mean towards Epel. "I'll show you who's a potato you Bratz doll rip-off!". She legit said that.

She thinks Rook's creepy 🤣. She also wanted Leona to sing.

She instantly fell in love with Ortho.

My mom, ever the music lover, started jumping excitedly during the audition. She even clapped and cheered for all of them.

She thought the songs were bops.

Neige and the Dwarves are adorable to her.

During Vil's overblot and flashback, her disgust towards Vil turned to empathy. She especially felt bad when Vil was being bullied. On a lighthearted note, she wished my dad was like Vil's dad.

She's so proud of Deuce she literally cried tears of joy.

She thought that Malleus and Yuu's friendship was cute. She wished there was an option where we could call Malleus MalMal instead of Tsunotaro.

She was kinda down when NRC didn't win but was happy for RSA nonetheless. She called it karma that Vil was forced to sing with Neige. She felt bad for Jamil though.

My mom legit bursted into happy tears when she saw Mickey in the flesh but that joy turned to fear and worry when Grim attacked us. "What happened?! Is Yuu alright?!"

And now she thinks Idia is sketchy. She refuses to believe Ortho is in on this. "Nooooo, not the cute robot boy!"

As a sidenote, she said that if I ever went to NRC, she's pulling me out immediately 😂.

[Here’s the other installments for the Mom Anon: Ep 2 / Ep 3 / Ep 4]

Don’t ask where Ep 1 is; I don’t actually recall having received an ask specifically about that—

Good, feed TWST your tears 😊

Your mom can join the rest of the TWST theorists on the true nature and meaning of Michard Mouse who has lost all of his fame and extensive media empire in this world 😩 I think at this point the pattern for OBs has been well established (though the festival setting is certainly new and provides an added element of public exposure to the threat). djsvwjxnkss Imagine being some happy-go-lucky festival goer and you witness a celebrity causing chaos 😅 I think you’d just drop your cotton candy and run for the nearest authority figure at that point… Good thing the NRC boys were able to keep the OB contained though!

Yeah, it’s always exciting to see old characters return in later episodes your mom’s in for a treat with episode 6. We can see how they’ve changed since we last saw them. Unfortunately, we don’t get to hear of the aftermath of the conversation Riddle had with his mother, but it’s nice to just catch up with the dorm leader that started it all. (And, of course, Kalim is also present being a good boi 😌)

Mmm, I don’t think Vil acted the nicest (especially not this episode) but 🤔 I do think it’s interesting to observe how much harsher the criticisms made at his expense can be. I get the sense that people think it’s okay to call Vil out for his cruelty, but hesitate to do the same for others (such as Riddle), even when those characters have all done/said abhorrent things. I wonder if that justification comes down to Vil being the type of person who doesn’t like to show when he is hurting or being affected by negative comments (versus other characters, who are more overtly emotional or reactive). It comes with the territory of being a celebrity: you need thick skin to survive in the entertainment industry, where everyone will be judging you at all times of the day. It must bring him a lot of distress, and it also leaves him in a tough situation where he often cannot outwardly express his frustrations.

I don’t know, it makes me feel slightly uncomfortable seeing Vil in particular receives certain kinds of vitriol from the fandom, because I’m sure he’s also getting that in-universe from his “haters”. No matter where he exists, he must be facing intense public scrutiny (sometimes on very superficial things too), and I don’t know how he manages to deal with it. Like, even in the comment quoted, it’s not Vil’s character being insulted but his appearance (even if his appearance is totally unrelated to the situation). I guess it’s easy to roast celebrities when you only really get to see slivers of them in various media or maybe they’re seen as living “perfect” lives, but I don’t agree with being mean to them (or to anyone, really 💦). Confident people can still be hurt, and those in seemingly glamorous positions have valid issues. That isn’t to defend their missteps, but rather just me being sad about a general lack of empathy 😔

Let Rook beeee 😭 I won’t stand for this huntsman slander— Funnily enough, the game has teased Leona singing a few times before (most recently in Endless Halloween Night), but we’ve never actually heard him do it.

The VDC auditions were so cuuute 🥰 I really enjoyed the variation in their performances, as well as the characterization of Rook and Vil that we got through it. Rook is the positive judge that can see the charm points in each individual, but Vil is the more critical judge that can really “read” what is at the core of each person’s performance. For example, he mentions that Cater’s performance doesn’t seem to have heart behind it and that Lilia’s performance makes him seem older than a high school student. MY FAVORITE ONE WAS ORTHO THOUGH, his was so cool!! They patched his scene so that he sounds like a Vocaloid while singing, which was an excellent touch 🎵 (Great job with that one, Idia!)

Mmm, I personally don’t care for the songs in episode 5 (with the exception of Piece of My World, if that counts), but I’m glad that others enjoyed them so much! I feel similarly towards Neige and the Dwarves; there’s nothing offensive about them, they’re just a little… bland for my tastes. Cute, yes, but ultimately bland.

Vil and Azul have similar backstories in that they involve being bullied and then using that experience to fuel their efforts to better themselves and to prove their worth to their peers. I think this is why those two are able to garner sympathy (but not always empathy) from the fandom. Oddly enough though, I usually see people not forgiving Vil for his actions while also exonerating Azul for his. This… has always been weird to me, because I see Azul as someone who has done much more damage over the years than Vil has—and what’s more, Vil is one of THE most apologetic OB boys of the cast and clearly owns up to his wrongdoings. I think this difference comes from the perception of each boy; again, Vil is often viewed as harsh and overly critical, and not a lot of the general public can relate to his being a child star, so he earns less empathy overall 💦 Some of this perception also comes down to a misunderstanding of his reasons for Overblotting; I've seen many label it as shallow or driven by vanity when... well, that's not entirely true. He's ultimately looking for approval and validation of his identity and the work that he does, and that's something I think everyone wants. I just wish more people were open-minded when looking over Vil's backstory. Just because he had a successful career and a supportive father doesn't mean Vil didn't struggle to get to where he is today. Even then, he's not entirely happy with himself. That's not Vil being spoiled or entitled, that's Vil thinking he can be even better. It's that ambition and drive that defines him.

aiudbaidbabsd Vil's dad though 😫 the real OG... It must be hard for a big star like him to make time for his child, and yet he still manages to do it. It's also just nice to see a supportive parent for once in these flashbacks instead of people like the Viper parents and Mama Rosehearts (or not really involved in or aware of the formative trauma like the Kingscholar parents and the Ashengrotto parents).

When I first played through episode 5, I wasn't expecting Deuce to get his unique magic at all. Now that it's said and done, I think we can all share in his pride and excitement. We've followed him on this journey for so long, and he finally gets this big payoff and he gets to rub it in Ace's smug face.

Episode 5 is a big turning point in terms of Malleus and Yuu’s relationship; this is when his true identity is revealed to them and everyone else becomes aware that they know each other. As I’ve said before, I don’t find myself convinced by their friendship due to how little they interacted during the main story, but I guess that’s just a consequence of the writers trying to keep Malleus “mysterious”. I’m sure plenty of people find him and Yuu endearing in spite of that.

I believe the significance of Malleus being called “Tsunotaro” even after his true name and title are revealed is that it calls attention to Yuu just treating him like a normal person. There’s no option to call him some variant of his actual name because “Malleus” is inherently associated with big titles: the dorm leader of Diasomnia, crown prince to the Briar Valley, one of the strongest mages in all of Twisted Wonderland. These isolate him from others, and it’s of great importance that Yuu is an exception to this and treats him like an equal.

Haha, there’s always that initial hit of disappointment when the results come out. It’s good that your mom didn’t linger on the sadness and the defeat for too long and was happy that the nice RSA boys cinched the victory. Everyone singing and suffering together at the end was the perfect way to conclude the Pomefiore arc~ (Jamil’s deadpan tone and face were 👌)

cbssksnsn That’s a first 😂 I don’t think I’ve seen many people get excited at the idea of meeting Mickey; I feel like most TWST fans (myself included) are quick to meme on him or theorize, or they’re just put off by his presence at all. It certainly feels a little “out of place” with the aesthetics and the world (at least until it gets further explanation).

I was worried about Grim attacking Yuu too but 😔 it ultimately just amounts to nothing more than a cat scratch, which I found disappointing (as it’s really low stakes despite how serious the situation is framed). That’s probably a relief to others though, I can’t imagine that most would be eager to see Yuu and Grim in pain.

… Since when has every end of episode preview for the next ever made the next OB boy NOT look sketchy?? 👁 👄 👁 It’s okay, no matter how sketchy Idia may be, Ortho’s there to balance it out with his innocence.

Isekai’d into Twisted Wonderland with your mom?? 😂 I don’t think the main story would be able to happen if any sane, responsible adult was actually present long enough to keep the kids out of trouble looking at you, Crowley.

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jiminiesfavouritecolourisblue · 26 days

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Hi, dear Blue, I saw your post and Rushed over! Coincidentally I reread the first three chapters of the CEO series before work today because it is a masterpiece! So I have fresh thoughts on them rn. Hope this helps motivate you even a little🥰💜

Chapter 1: Complaint

Ah the first part of what has become an Absolute Masterpiece!

From the first chapter I was hooked, obsessed, and addicted. This particular part was what really got me excited for the series-

“Did you get hurt, angel?” Jimin says softly. Tears definitely start to well up in your eyes as you look towards him. Taehyung let’s go of your chin to caress your cheek as a tear drops and he wipes it away. Namjoon’s eyes darken, they know for absolute fact you could do no wrong but unless they wanted HR to come visit they needed to resolve this in house. He knew that bitch was lying through her teeth about their favourite girl, but they needed you to tell them what actually happened so they could get rid of her without any mess. “We can’t help you baby girl if you don’t tell us,” he says, hoping it would elicit something out of you.“You guys are the problem,” you say through a sob, and your arms come to cover your face as more tears shed down your face. Their hearts sink at your words, Taehyung frowns at you, his dark eyes disappearing to look at you with sadness.

I've reread this one more times than I care to admit lol including thrice just today. One thing I noticed immediately and really loved was that you were careful to mention everyone, even if they didn't get a ton of dialogue you made sure to mention their thoughts or actions.

Chapter 2: Mediation

Aka Jimin's chapter. You know an author understands how to write Jimin when I can literally hear Filter in my mind while reading his parts. Our Blue is truly amazing🤩💜💜💜

All of the boys feel thoughtfully written as well. Jin who's calm and gentle but we all know he's just as if not more dangerous than the rest, Joon is the epitome of calm before the storm as well as the storm itself, you do NOT want to be on his bad side, Yoongi ever done with everyone's sh*t and probably wants to fire the rest of the building on the daily, except for Y/N of course who brings out his secret not so little soft side and the cutestgummy smile known to man, our Sunshine Hobi whose dark side is just as scary as his bright side is cheerful,,,, mad Hobi is honestly so attractive though,,,, and I love watching the Maknaes be petty towards Suran (or anyone really lol) and protective and clingy with Y/N🥰😂

Chapter 3: Resolution

The Dinner Date! It was such a cute chapter, short and sweet and has me grinning like a schoolgirl with a crush everytime I read it. Once again you go above and beyond making sure all the boys get a fair amount of attention while still making Y/N feel like the main character. I love being able to watch the character grow and really related with the anxious self thought in the first part of the chapter. Oh to have seven boyfriends to boost my self-worth at any time😍 Y/N is definitely living the dream right now.

P.S. Sorry this ended up so long hehe my bad.

💜

Why are you apologising 😭 this was exactly what I needed 💜🥺 I have a really hard time balancing the characters and the storylines but at the heart of all my stories I think the characters are central and I forget that sometimes 🙃 I also always forget about chapter 2 and 3 🤣 and then when I reread to check continuity I’m like … I wrote this? When? 🤦🏽‍♀️

Lovely you are literally such an angel, and I’m keeping you forever; genuinely if you leave me I’ll riot and go on strike 😤 no pressure 😁

I’m so determined to finish the next chapter today, I’ve got one more scene to write and then it needs editing

#THE FIRST THREE CHAPTERS WERE SOFT I NEED TO BRING BACK THE SOFTNESS #ceo au ask #my favourite people in my ask box makes my week #especially when they write essays about something I’ve written #😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 excuse me while I go cry #screenshot this and Imma put it in my motivation album #archive

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teriri-sayes · 8 months

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Reactions to Tsunami Creator's Chapter 177

TL;DR - CJS misunderstanding Cale. GoD and Cale's convo. Cale and Alberu's convo. Cale's group arrives at Guangdong Beach.

Soos? LSH = ❌ CJS = ✅

The Misunderstanding The first part was so hilarious that I translated it:

Cale's expression hardened as he frowned. What did this guy just say? "…Sob. You're so mean…?" Cale was so dumbfounded that he read the message sent to him. It was something he did without even realizing it. "Hey, you know-" Choi Jung Soo, who happened to be just entering, saw Cale holding up a dazzling mirror and saying, "Sob, you're so mean." And he quietly went out. With an expression that he saw something he shouldn't see.

Ahahahaha 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 CJS thought Cale was talking to himself and immediately went out of the room in shock.... 😂 And it doesn't stop there. Remember that Ron is in the room too? Does Ron know that Cale can talk to GoD with that mirror? Or does he also think that Cale had gone crazy? 😂

Cale: ...Sob. You're so mean...? Ron: ... Cale: Have you gone crazy? Ron: ... Cale: Ron. Ron: Yes, young master. Cale: I'm going to have a conversation, so please take that man out. Ron: Have a pleasant conversation. *takes Baek out with him*

No, seriously. I want to know if Ron is aware of the divine mirror's function. 🤣🤣🤣

GoD's Info Dump This part took half of the chapter, but to summarize:

GoD will tell Zed's location in exchange for Cale finding CJG

GoD got stepped on by GoB again

God of Hope came to save GoD

GoB was deeply concerned after hearing the report about the Aipotu world, and gave Cale more freedom

GoD warns Cale (out of his own goodwill) to not know more about the divine world if Cale did not want to be a god

Cale and GoD's conversation always makes me laugh too... 🤣🤣🤣

GoD: I'll tell you Zed's current location if you do me one favor. Cale: To find CJG? GoD: I really like how you can talk with me. Cale: I hate the fact that I can communicate with you. GoD: Sobs

Bob Alberu in Endable Cale contacted Alberu to report what he found about Zed, and was surprised to find that Alberu was disguised as the dark elf Bob again. So what happened? Apparently, while he and Eruhaben were looking for a location to place the mine in Endable, they found a suspicious place deep underground of White Star's palace.

There were some traces of crossing worlds there. And the traces of a god's power too. Woah. And the first god Cale suspected was... God of War. Why? Because Cotton was in Endable at that time.

It doesn't help that GoW treated the Water AP badly. Sure, he cherished her, but kept her "chained" unlike GoD who doted on Cage and let her run free. Water AP knew that GoW was good, but also cold. She herself was left confused after Cale's conversation with Alberu.

Ending Remarks Chapter ended with Cale arriving at the beach where they will board a boat to head to Hainan Island. Anyway, today was a good chapter. Lots of funny stuff and some info dump. Next chapter will probably be the prelude to the battle. Ah, I'm excited to see another tsunami again!

#tcf spoilers #trash of the count's family

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ivarlover · 11 months

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UNEXPECTED

Part 2 (sequel #3 to UNLEASHED and UNDENIABLE)

Alex + Modern Ivar

Mentions of Female Reader + Hvitserk

If you're new here and want to catch up, just scroll down my page, and the first chapter to UNLEASHED is at the bottom, then UNDENIABLE, and now, UNEXPECTED...

This was supposed to be just a one-shot but the story has come alive and the need to write more can't be ignored. At this point, I have no idea how many chapters this will end up consiating of. Hope you enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it! 🔥

Summary: During a hot weekend with your classmate, Alex, and his best friend, Ivar, the two of them had their own fun together. And now, it had turned into an entire relationship between the two of them that neither of them had seen coming. Now, that reality had set in, they navigate the relationship and all that comes along with it, the good, the bad, and the unexpected.

Inspired by a naughty conversation with a friend of mine. 😍

Warnings, The sequel in general: Totally NSFW, Unprotected anal sex (male receiving), oral, male to male contact and more, a bad case of the feels, and smut, with me, there is ALWAYS smut 🤣 Each chapter will have it's own warnings.

This chapter: A little smut, of course, the feels, mentions of Ivar's ex love and the insecurities that brings with it, parents reactions to finding out their boys are together romantically

Please leave a comment and let me know what you think!

Words: I don't know; there are many, many words 🤣

Let me know if you want on or off the tag list!

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Before they knew it, the morning sun was shining through the bedroom windows and Alex stirred, still in Ivar's arms. As he started to get up, Ivar's arms tightened around him, "Umm-uh. Not yet," Ivar mumbled, sleep still thick in his voice. "Why are you already awake?"

"I'm just going to the bathroom. I'll be right back," Alex laughed.

"Ok," Ivar responded without even opening his eyes. "When you get back I need your help with something," he said, grabbing his morning wood through his boxers and shaking it toward Alex.

"Oh my God! You're despicable, Ivar!" Alex got to his feet and threw a pillow at Ivar, laughing harder now.

"Yes, and you love me for it," Ivar laughed.

When Alex returned, there he saw Ivar, fast asleep, laying on his back, morning glory on display through his boxers, looking quite irresistible. He thought about it for a second and then walked over to the bedroom door. He shook it roughly, ensuring that it was indeed locked, and walked back over to the bed.

He stood at the foot of the bed for another moment and just watched Ivar's chest move up and down as he breathed heavily. He looked so pleasant and peaceful that he almost didn't want to disturb him. Almost.

Alex pulled the sheet back, off of Ivar and Ivar groaned a little but continued in his deep slumber. Alex slowly crawled over Ivar's body and stopped just over his waist. He leaned down and placed a warm, wet kiss just below Ivar's navel, on his happy trail, making Ivar jolt involuntarily. As Alex began to pull Ivar's boxers down, Ivar immediately grabbed them tightly and sat up, "What? What the fuck is..?" and he then realized what was happening and who was undressing him.

"Well, good morning, sunshine," Alex told him in a very sultry voice as he kissed him deeply then pulled away. "Now, lay back down, babe," and Ivar gladly did as he was told.

Alex continued with removing Ivar's boxers, only this time, with Ivar's help. Ivar grinned approvingly as he looked down at Alex, dropping the boxers to the floor.

Alex leaned up and forward over Ivar, caging him. Ivar raised his hands to grab Alex and pull him into another kiss but Alex caught his hands. He then, quickly threw them up by his head, holding them firmly in place. "Not so quick, now. I need you to just lay back and enjoy," Alex grinned and leaned down and licked Ivar's lips. Ivar didn't know what had gotten into Alex this morning but he liked it.

"Now, I'm going to let go of your hands but you have to leave them here by your head. If you move them or touch me, you'll be punished."

"Oohh. Punished? You promise?" Ivar asked all excitedly.

"Yes, but not how you're thinking, babe. Punished, meaning everything will stop, and you'll have to beg."

"Ha! Beg! Right!" Ivar rolled his eyes.

"Well, you've been warned," Alex slowly let go of Ivar's hands. He leaned down to face Ivar and he stopped just as his mouth was right above Ivar's. As he got a little closer, he slowly and gently kissed Ivar. Just as Ivar began to deepen the kiss, Alex pulled away from him. He hovered just above him again and Ivar almost grabbed him and pulled him back down into another kiss before he remembered Alex's rule.

Ivar groaned, "Kiss me again."

Alex leaned back down and just as he reached Ivar's mouth, he stopped and heavily breathed into Ivar's mouth, causing Ivar to moan. "I'm in charge here this time, Ivar. Not you," Alex grinned. Ivar grunted but didn't move his hands.

Alex then licked Ivar's lips again and softly bit his bottom one before beginning to lightly kiss down his jaw toward his neck. He feathered light, wet kisses to the nape of Alex's neck and then withdrew his mouth and lightly blew hot air onto where he'd been kissing. Ivar arched his back and moaned, "Fuck, babe! You've got to let me touch you."

"Not a chance," Alex grinned into Ivar's neck as he licked it, sending chills coursing all through Ivar's body.

"FUCK!"

Alex continued to kiss and nibble down Ivar's collarbone, to his chest as Ivar squirmed. Ivar gritted his teeth, together and placed his hands on his own head and in his hair attempting to prevent himself from grabbing Alex like he was dying to. He began to sweat. He hadn't realized how hard this would be for him.

Alex lightly touched Ivar's smooth chest with his fingertips, dragging them along behind his warm kisses, as he continued to make his way lower down Ivar's chest and stomach. When he reached Ivar's belly button, he placed his plump lips over it and kissed it as he dipped his tongue into it.

Ivar lost it. His hands automatically went to Alex, one landing on his head, tangling in his hair, and the other on his shoulder and back. He pulled Alex's hair without even thinking as he groaned in complete dismay. He squeezed Alex's shoulder tightly and tried to pull him back up to face him. "Damn! Alex! I want you!" He breathed out heavily.

Alex sat up on his knees, pulling away from Ivar completely. "I hope you're ready to beg. Your orders were to keep your hands by your head."

Ivar looked him straight in the face, "Fuck! You were serious about that, love? I'm sorry. Just, umm, damn, come back and finish what you started."

Alex smiled and placed his hand in his own boxers and began to slowly stroke his manhood, "I have no problem finishing on my own while I watch you lay there and squirm. You chose the punishment and the punishment is you have to beg."

Ivar rolled his eyes and groaned as if he was in physical pain, "Fuck!"

Alex pulled his own boxers down just enough for Ivar to get a good view of his hand wrapped tightly around his own cock as he slowly pumped up and down. He licked his lips while looking into Ivar's eyes, "This could be you, babe." He rolled his eyes into the back of his head, exaggerating his movements, and dramatically moaned, "Or I can just finish, myself, while you watch. Oh and it feels so good," he whimpered.

Ivar practically growled, "Damn you! You know what you licking your lips does to me, you little tease!"

In a sultry voice, Alex said, "Then beg. Beg for what you want, Ivar. Beg and your wish is my command. Just beg." Alex licked his lips again, this time even slower than before and then bit his bottom lip.

"Oh hell! Just come back. Place your hands on me again. Put your mouth on me, anywhere, just put it back on me and finish what you started. Oh my God! PLEASE! Please, love, I need to feel your mouth on me again. Please, for my sanity, please come back and let me feel that magical fucking mouth of yours again. Fuck! Please!"

"And what will you do with your hands? Hummm?"

Ivar moaned out between heavy pants, "Fuck! I'll cut them off if you need me to! Just fucking touch me again with your mouth and hands. Please! I won't touch you again until you say I can. I fucking promise! Just please!"

Ivar began to whine and Alex felt pleased knowing he had this power over him. "Ok, I think I've tortured you enough. Put both of your hands by your head and leave them there." Ivar immediately did as he was told and even placed both hands under his head to try to prevent himself from his temptation, looking down at Alex to see what he'd do next.

Alex ran his fingertips down Ivar's chest, reveling in the feel of his hard body and soft skin under his touch. Ivar squirmed as he sighed with relief. Alex then bent back down and looking up at Ivar, dragged his tongue from Ivar's collarbone to his belly button. Ivar whelped in sheer pleasure, his body writhing underneath Alex's hands and mouth.

Alex pulled barely an inch from Ivar and spoke into his abdomen, breathing his hot air onto Ivar's wet skin and causing Ivar to arch his back, his head digging into the pillow behind him. "I'm going to kiss you here again, babe," he breathed heavily, "But don't you fucking move your hands."

Ivar screwed his eyes shut and did all he could not to move his hands. He needed Alex to continue pleasing him even if it was also torture. Alex opened his mouth over Ivar's navel and gently kissed it as if he were kissing Ivar's mouth. As his wet lips rubbed against Ivar's skin, he stuck his tongue out and licked and sucked his belly button. Ivar grabbed handfuls of his own hair and pulled, feeling helpless, wanting nothing more than to touch Alex. He longed to feel him in his hands but he restrained himself and let Alex take control. It was really his first time giving someone this kind of control over himself and he was surprised at how much he enjoyed it and hated it at the same time.

Alex looked up at Ivar, seductively, into his lust filled eyes and smiled when Ivar growled at him. While his hands continued to lightly rub across Ivar's chest and stomach, he continued to kiss futher down Ivar's happy trail.

As Alex got closer to Ivar's swollen cock, Ivar's breathing sped up in anticipation, his toes curled and his entire body stiffened. Alex's hands trailed from his stomach down to his hips where he grabbed on tightly, sending chills throughout Ivar's body.

Alex turned his head toward Ivar's every ready cock that was standing firm against his body. Purposely breathing heavily, he licked up the side of it from the base to the tip. He then moved his head and did the same thing on the other side of Ivar's hard dick. Every nerve in Ivar's body tingled at the sensation and his hips bucked forward. Ivar let out a wailing growl and moaned, "Alex, love, please, can I touch you?"

Alex glanced up at Ivar as he sucked the tip of his dick into his mouth. He swirled his tongue around it, causing Ivar to shut his eyes tightly as he whimpered. Alex answered him with his dick still in his mouth, "Umm humm."

Ivar yanked his head up and looked down at Alex, "Yes, I can finally fucking touch you?"

Alex repeated the humming sound, "Umm humm," sending rumbling vibrations into Ivar's dick and through to his core.

Ivar groaned, "Fuck yes!" He leaned forward and grabbed Alex with one hand on his head, tangling his fingers in his hair. His other hand caressed what bit of Alex's arm and hand he could reach, still planted tightly on Ivar's hip. He left his hand on top of Alex's and laid back down on the bed.

Alex pulled Ivar's hips into him, striving for even more closeness, as he hungrily sank his mouth down over Ivar's entire cock. Ivar grunted at the feeling and his eyes rolled into the back of his head. Alex found his pace and began to rhythmically bob up and down on Ivar's cock, swirling his tongue all around as he did.

Animalistic sounds escaped Ivar's mouth as Alex worked his magic. Ivar's legs trembled, and body arched again as Alex moved his hand from his hip to cup his balls. He gently moved Ivar's balls in sync with the bobbing of his head, and it was simply driving Ivar insane. "Awww, hell! Fuck!" Ivar yelled. "I can't take anymore! I need you, Alex! Fuck!" He growled.

Alex ignored him and continued to suck on him. Hard. He went as far down on Ivar as he could, nearly causing himself to gag, and slowly sucked all the way back up to the tip of his dick as he looked up and into Ivar's eyes. When he reached the tip, he swirled his tongue around it, while simultaneously sucking, before letting his dick out of his mouth with a pop. Alex grinned as Ivar tensed and mumbled out obscenities, his hands now white knuckled and tangled in the sheets.

Alex kissed down the under side of Ivar's very stout manhood until he got to his balls. He flicked his tongue across them, feeling very relieved that Ivar loved grooming himself and was waxed bald, causing Ivar to hiss, sweat rolling down his temple.

Alex pushed both of Ivar's legs up and back, exposing better access to his ass. Ivar instantly clinched his cheeks together and Alex chuckled, "I promise I'm not going to hurt you, babe. Relax."

Alex began kissing and sucking under Ivar's balls and to the soft skin between them and his hole. As he lightly nibbled the skin, Ivar yelled out incoherent words. Alex continued on, finally reaching Ivar's sensitive opening. He quickly licked across it, causing Ivar to jolt his hips forward. He then lowered his face and licked around the rim and began giving Ivar the most sensual kisses he'd ever received to a part of his body that wasn't his mouth.

Ivar's eyes widened as he looked down to Alex, in complete disbelief at how good this felt. He squirmed and panted, struggling to keep his breathing steady, as Alex practically made love to his ass with his mouth and tongue. It was like nothing Ivar had ever experienced before.

With his tongue flattened out, Alex then made a long, thick stroke from Ivar's hole, across his balls, and back up his twitching dick, finally sucking the tip back into his mouth. Ivar began to salivate at the sight below him as Alex instantly went back to his expert work.

One of Ivar's hands found it's way to Alex's hair, grabbing a handful, and tugged on it while the other nearly ripped a hole into the sheets. Alex kept bobbing up and down and Ivar knew he was close. He somehow managed to speak and said, "I-I'm so close. Wh-what about you, love?"

Alex raised a hand, not wanting to pull away from Ivar, and motioned his finger back and forth, saying no. Ivar answered, "Now, that's not fair. Turn your body around so that your crotch is in my face, and then we can pleasure eachother." Again, Alex waved his finger back and forth, saying no to Ivar.

Ivar wasn't able to protest as he lost complete control when Alex held onto his hips and greedily pulled him even closer and as deep into his mouth as possible. With a final hard suck and twirl of Alex's tongue, Ivar felt the heat raging within his body. "Al-Alex! I-I'm com..." Ivar moaned out, "MOVE! I'M COMING!"

Alex continued to hungrily suck Ivar, milking him for every drop, as Ivar groaned and growled through gritted teeth, shooting his load down Alex's throat.

Ivar's breathing was irratic as he pulled on Alex's shoulders, attempting to pull him back up his body. Alex quickly understood what Ivar wanted and slowly let his cock pop out of his mouth, licking his lips. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and seductively crawled back over Ivar.

Once he reached Ivar, face to face, Ivar began, "Oh fuck! I-I'm so sorry! I tried to warn you. Shit! I'm sorry."

Alex placed a finger over Ivar's lips, "Shhh. It's ok. I had time to move. I didn't want to. Even I am surprised at how much I enjoyed this." And it was true. Alex hadn't expected to let Ivar finish in his mouth but he enjoyed knowing that what he was doing directly affected Ivar so immensely that he wanted to "seal the deal" in a sense. He blushed, "Is it ok if I kiss you now?"

Looking deeply into Alex's eyes, Ivar answered, "Hell, yes!" and pulled Alex down and they began passionately kissing, tongues wrestling, hands roaming, chests heaving as they shared the air between them. As the realization of everything circled through his mind, Ivar broke the kiss and said, "Oh my God, Alex. That was another first for us and umm," he took a second to catch his breath, "That was pretty fucking amazing. To what do I owe this surprise?"

"Nothing. I just love you. Simple as that," Alex hummed and settled in the bed beside Ivar. "I'm actually sleepy again now."

Ivar grinned, "So, now I know how to keep you in bed past 7 am in the mornings, finally. Just wear you out with hot, steamy sex," they both chuckled. "Mental note taken. This should be fun." He kissed Alex on the forehead as his arms engulfed him, pulling him even closer than he already was. In a matter of minutes, they were both off to sleep again.

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"Guys! Mom's calling us down for breakfast! Hey, guys, wake up! Let's eat," Hvitserk knocked on Ivar's bedroom door and continued down the hall and downstairs when he heard Ivar grumble something back. "I guess they're coming, mom, but does that mean I have to wait on them? I'm starving."

Aslaug rolled her eyes at Hvitserk, "I don't believe I've ever seen you when you weren't. It won't kill you to wait five more minutes." She glanced over to you, "How do you put up with him, dear?"

You laughed nervously. You could definitely understand Alex's apprehension around her. If nothing else, she was certainly intimidating.

About that time, Ivar came bouncing down the stairs. "Good morning," he sang as he walked passed Hvitserk, thumping him in the back of his head. He rounded the table and took a seat.

"Damn, man, you sure seem happy. What's up with that?" Hvitserk grinned evily and Ivar kicked him under the table. "Where's Alex? I'm hungry," Hvitserk grumbled as you and Ivar laughed at him.

Aslaug turned from the coffee pot, placing cups in front of each of you. "Good morning, dear. Yes, where is Alex?"

Alex entered at that very moment, cheeks red as Aslaug and he made eye contact, and he sat down beside Ivar. Ivar placed his hand on top of Alex's, ignoring his wide eyed stare, and gently squeezed it. Alex couldn't help how nervous he was after the night's turn of events with Aslaug.

You noticed this and looked over at Alex questionly. He only shrugged his shoulders at you.

Things began to feel a little less stressful as the five of you ate. You all talked and laughed and discussed what a good cook Aslaug was.

Alex thanked her for breakfast and said he'd get the dishes, aiming for some brownie points. You took the plates to the kitchen with him and offered to help, seizing the opportunity to talk to him and ask what it was that you'd clearly missed. As the two of you began cleaning up from breakfast, Alex began telling you about what happened with Aslaug the night before.

Still sitting in the dining room, Aslaug looked at her two boys and then back to Ivar. "Ivar, we still need to have that talk. It's really important. Maybe after you two take them," and she motioned toward the kitchen, "back home."

"No, mom," Ivar interrupted her, "anything you can say to me, you can say in front of Alex. I'm sorry, mom, but he and I are together and we're in love. I hate you found out the way you did, but I really hope you can understand and accept that."

"That's not it at all, dear. It's just that, well, what I need to tell you is extremely important and very personal and I'm not even a hundred percent sure you'll want Hvitserk here."

"Honestly, mom, knowing that it's about Katia," Hvitserk nearly choked on his coffee as Ivar continued, "I'm seriously not even interested. That part of my life is over."

"Well, I have a feeling that all is going to change, dear," Aslaug answered him, "If you don't hear it from me, I'm sure she will find you herself."

You and Alex walked in at that very moment, not knowing you'd just saved Ivar. The tension in the room was thick as the two of you sat back down at the table. You looked at Hvitserk and you instantly knew how glad he was that you two came back when you did. He leaned over and kissed you quickly.

Ivar looked at Alex and then back to Aslaug, "Mom, I'm going to give Ivar a ride home now. I'll be back in time to drive you to the airport." Ivar didn't give her time to respond but stood and reached for Alex's hand. Alex looked up at him, placed his hand in his, and stood with him. He then followed Ivar up the stairs to his room.

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"What the hell was that all about?" Alex asked Ivar as he closed the door behind him.

Ivar turned to him, trying to let his stress roll off his shoulders. He stepped to Alex and hugged him tightly, burying his face in Alex's neck, breathing a sigh of relief. "Hey, hey, what is it? What happened?" Alex was concerned now.

Ivar pulled away from him and said, "Oh, it's just that mom is determined to give me this news of Katia's, and, Alex, I seriously don't want to hear it. I'm worried she'll wait until we're in the car ride to the airport, where I don't have another choice, and dump it all out on me."

Alex thought for a moment before responding. He didn't want to push Ivar's buttons but he had to ask, "Ivar, do you think it worries you so much because you may possibly still have feelings for her? And whatever this news is may just change how you see things?" Alex held his breath as he waited for Ivar's response.

Ivar stood straight and firmly answered, "Oh, God, no, Alex, not at all. I'm so sorry I've worried you." He held Alex's face between his hands and gave him a quick kiss. "That's not it. I just umm, well, I seriously feel like I owe her nothing. I know you know, I gave my all and then some and she just umm, she broke me," he sighed and dropped his head. "I'm actually worried of just the opposite. I'm worried what I may say to her, how mean and evil I know I'll be, and umm, the worst part is I don't feel sorry for it. I think it's better if she just leaves me alone. I don't want to feel like that again and I don't want to be cruel but I think I resent her for what she put me through and I don't want that to come out now. Not now that I'm finally over it and happy with my life, happier than I've ever been before." He kissed Alex once more, "And that's thanks to you. I don't want her ruining this, us."

Alex felt torn. He felt horrible for Ivar and all that he knew he'd been through and understood exactly where he was coming from but he also still felt worried. He couldn't help it. Even as Ivar spoke of her, Alex could only think about how hurt Ivar still sounded and felt like that meant that deep down, Ivar still had some kind of feelings for her. He hoped he was wrong and that Ivar would be able to keep to his plan but it was in the back of head now and he knew it would be until they knew what she wanted.

Alex decided not to press the subject. He would respect Ivar's decision and hope for the best. "Oh, come here," Alex stretched out his arms to Ivar and hugged him tightly. "I love you," he said in Ivar's ear as he brushed away his hair and kissed him on the side of his head. He felt Ivar begin to relax in his arms and he loved knowing he had this affect on him, that he was able to help him even if only a little. "Look, don't worry. If she starts to tell you anything you don't want to hear, just tell her. Refuse to listen. Hell, blast your radio," Alex laughed. "But, it will be time for you to take her soon so hey, can I get that ride now?"

Ivar perked up, "Oh, you can get that ride anytime you want, love," Ivar flirted.

Alex let go of him, face in his palm, and said, "Oh, what was I thinking? I should have chosen my words better. You're a mess. Let's go, hornball," Alex said, laughing, and the two of them left quickly, shouting goodbyes to everyone.

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It was 1 a.m., and Alex heard a knock at the door. Luckily, he was still awake, just finishing up some studying in bed, so he got up to see if it was who he hoped.

Looking through the peephole on his front door, Alex smiled. He opened the door, "To what do I owe this surprise?"

A drunken Ivar stumbled through the door, "I couldn't wait until tomorrow. I needed to see you now. Can I," he burped mid-sentence, "Can I stay here tonight?"

Alrx laughed, "Of course, babe. Come in." Alex looked out on the street and saw Hvitserk in Ivar's car. He waved and drove off.

Alex helped Ivar as he stumbled through the apartment to Alex's bedroom. He pulled his t-shirt off and fell, face first, onto Alex's bed. "Are you ok, Ivar?"

"Yes," Ivar answered, "Umm, can I have a glass of water?"

When Alex returned with a water, to his surprise, Ivar was sitting up against the headboard. "Thank you," Ivar told Alex as he grabbed the glass and drank all of the water in one huge gulp. "Can I just lay here with you, love?"

"Of course, you can, but Ivar, what's wrong?" Alex felt extremely uneasy. He knew something had happened. He just wasn't sure what.

"Umm, not what you think. Don't worry, but umm, yes, Katia," Ivar's voice sounded cold.

Alex's heart sank. He hadn't went to the bar tonight because he had a big exam on Monday that he desperately needed to study for and he knew they'd be busy tomorrow because the two of them were supposed to go visit Alex's mom.

Now that he saw how Ivar was and knew he'd seen Katia, he could only assume Ivar was heartbroken all over again, and it scared him to his core. "Ivar, umm, what happened then?Umm, what did she tell you?"

Ivar moved closer to Alex and Alex, sensing exactly what he needed, wrapped his arms around him tightly, and waited for him to get his thoughts together.

Ivar sighed and began, "First off, yes, I've been drinking, but no, I'm not shitfaced and even though I apparently have no balance," he laughed, "I am thinking clearly and will remember this conversation."

He was so precisely clear that Alex knew he was telling the truth. "Ok, noted, but ummm, what do I not know, Ivar? What did she say?"

Ivar stiffened up in Alex's arms as be began again, "Alex, she came to the fucking bar to find me. She only just saw my mom yesterday and tonight she already brought her smart-ass to the bar, looking for me. The one fucking night when you weren't with me." He sat back up beside Alex in the bed and ran his hands through his hair. "Alex, when I saw her, all these emotions came rushing through me. She was just as beautiful as she always was, if not more, if that's even possible and..."

Alex placed his fingers over Ivar's mouth, interrupting him, "That's enough. I can't fucking sit here and listen to you tell me how beautiful your fucking ex fiance still is. Just break it off with me already and stop torturing me for fuck's sake." Alex's voice was cold and harsh even though he really was about to completely crumble inside. The very thing he'd been worried about was happening.

Ivar reached his left hand across Alex's body and cupped his right cheek, turning his face toward him. "No, Alex. No, that's not what I'm saying. Not at all. Let me finish, love. She was beautiful, yes, but when I saw her, the emotions that flooded my view, my heart, and my soul were emotions about you! I saw her and her beauty, and all I could think about was getting back home to you. I felt no love for her at all. It just made me realize just how much I do love you. She has no power over me now! Do you realize how empowering that is for me? I didn't even feel hate, Alex, and that, I totally expected to feel. I had no desire to get even with her or hurt her or be cruel or rude to her. I simply felt nothing. And yes, I could see how pretty she still is. I mean, I'm not blind, but it meant nothing to me." Ivar smiled as he wiped a tear from Alex's cheek.

"However, I still have no wish to talk to her. I don't care what she has to say. She's a stranger to me now. I was going to have one of the bouncers throw her out, but even that felt wrong so I had a few celebratory shots with Hvitserk, well, you know, he had coke, and then I asked him to bring me here. I had to see you. I had to tell you I love you! I love you, Alex, with all my heart, body, and soul. I never want to leave you. You're my world."

Alex was completely stunned out of his mind. That all was totally unexpected. He thought this conversation was going to end with the two of them breaking up and calling it quits altogether. He stared into Ivar's eyes, "I, umm, I thought you were ending it. I thought you and Katia were getting back together. Umm, you've shocked me. I, uh, I love you, too," Alex's eyes were full of tears that he tried to blink away.

Ivar leaned over to him, "Not a chance!" and he gave him a sloppy kiss. "I told you, you can't get rid of me that easily."

"So you still don't know what she wants then, huh?"

"No, and I don't care," Ivar had never been so sure of anything else before. Alex, on the other hand, still had an uneasy feeling about it all, but he tried his best to ignore it.

The two laid there, wrapped in eachother's arms, which was quickly becoming one of their favorite ways to sleep, and slowly drifted off to sleep.

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Alex and Ivar had planned to go visit Alex's mom on Sunday. They'd always went by to see her a Sunday or two each month, even back when they were only friends, and she'd been calling Alex to ask when they were coming next. She told him that it had been too long and she was beginning to get worried.

On the drive there, Alex asked Ivar about Aslaug. "So, how was the trip to the airport yesterday?"

"It actually wasn't all that bad. Mom told me that the more she thought about it, she felt like it wasn't her place to tell me whatever this big thing is with Katia. She told me she was going to let me talk to Katia on my own time and on my terms and said I can call her if I need her," Ivar sounded so pleased but it didn't make Alex feel any better at all.

Alex swallowed thickly, "And umm, what umm, what about us? What did she say about that?" Alex could only imagine.

"She actually didn't mention walking in on us at all! So you know me, I didn't either," Ivar laughed. "I'll wait and let her ask about us or say something whenever she's ready. I'm sure she just has to take time to just process it all."

Alex looked over at him and said, "Well, hopefully, when she does mention it, she will be ok with it all."

"Don't worry, love," Ivar reassured him, "I'm sure she will. Now, what about Mama Hogh? Are we telling her today or what?"

Alex's heart stopped, "Umm, I honestly don't know. I think I'm equally worried about her reaction, too."

"Well, look, no pressure. I'll leave it all up to you. It doesn't have to be today. I have you with me whether she knows or not, so I'm all good. I'll take your lead with this," Ivar's words didn't really help Alex feel any better but at least he knew he didn't have to tell his mom anything if it didn't feel right.

Alex was truly thankful for Ivar's understanding. He hadn't expected that telling their parents about their relationship would be such a difficult task but he realized it was because of not wanting to let them down, not wanting to burst their bubble about not having grandkids and he wondered if this was true for other same sex couples. He knew if he had the opportunity to stay with Ivar from now on, he would, and he knew that meant no child to carry on his name. He just wasn't sure how his mother would take that, and it definitely worried him.

He knew there were other options for them to raise a child together, but they'd certainly never discussed anything like that. They hadn't even discussed where they saw their relationship headed, and he was ok with that, so he wasn't planning on rocking that boat anytime soon. All he knew was that he loved Ivar like no other and he was happy just the way they were. Now, to tackle the subject with his mom.

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After the two of them helped her in the kitchen, preparing their meal, Ivar, Alex, and his mom sat down at the table to eat. She had watched them the entire time because they seemed almost as one, in sync, and so happy and well, different.

"Ok, what are you guys not telling me? Spill it," she asked, looking straight at them both.

Alex squirmed a little in his seat, and she didn't miss it. He and Ivar looked at eachother and then back to her. In the calmest voice he could muster, Alex answered, "What do you mean, mom?"

"Aww, don't you try to play that innocent game with me. You know I see straight through it. I don't know, there's just something different about the two of you, and you're trying to hide it. But boys, you're failing miserably, so just tell me. You know Mama Hogh knows her boys better than this."

Alex wanted to tell his mom, but not like this, when he was put on the spot so unexpectedly. He needed to prepare himself for her reaction, and right now, he had no idea what that would be. So he tried, desperately, to change the subject. "Mom, when is Anna and her new boyfriend coming to finally meet us? I miss her, and I'd love to finally meet this guy who is taking up all of her time."

She stuck her finger up and shook it back and forth at him. "Oh, no, mister. You're not getting out of this that easily. We'll talk about Anna later. We have all evening anyway. Before you make me worry, just tell me, Alex, what are you hiding?"

Ivar just looked at Alex to handle everything. He knew he was the one not ready to tell his mom. Ivar, however, didn't mind at all to tell her. He didn't think her reaction was going to be quite the world stopper that Alex seemed to believe. So he just settled in letting Alex answer her in whatever way he felt fit.

Determined, Alex finally answered, "Seriously, mom, what do you think we're hiding? We simply just came for dinner with you while dad's out of town. The same as we always have. What is there that's different?"

"Well, I'm hoping the two of you finally figured out what I've already known for quite some time now and that you're happy about it. I won't say what I'm thinking, though, because if I'm wrong, it would be super embarrassing, so you're just going to have to come clean."

Alex and Ivar both gulped, and their eyes were wide with shock now. "May I use your restroom, mom?" Ivar asked, trying to leave this uncomfortable situation.

"No, you may not! I am waiting for one of you to tell me what it is that you're hiding. I'm not dropping it until you spill the beans. Alex Hogh Andersen, out with it!"

Alex was already giving up. He knew how stubborn his mom could be. He knew that was a quality he'd definitely gotten from her. He looked at Ivar, who knodded, so he decided to answer her truthfully this time. "Well, mom, ummm Ivar and I umm, well, we're together."

"No shit. I'm not blind. So? Continue," she answered, not quite understanding what he meant.

"No, I mean, we're together, together, mom. Like as a couple."

The room was filled with silence. One of her hands covered her mouth as she placed the other over her heart, her eyes filling with tears.

Ivar's heart sank. He had so not expected this. Not for a second. If she had been anyone else, he would have definitely told her what she could do with her tears, and they'd be leaving immediately. This was supposed to be a happy time, a time for the two of them to celebrate. And now, his heart was breaking and even more for Alex. He knew what his mom's opinion meant to him.

Alex reached out and placed his hand over hers on her heart. "See, mom? This is why I didn't want to tell you. We're actually really, really happy with this, and I hoped you could be happy for us as well. It's all still so new to us both. I didn't think now was the right time to tell you as we are still adjusting ourselves. If you can't accept it, we can give you time. We can leave, mom, but this isn't something that your tears are going to be able to change. I, umm, I love Ivar, mom." He squeezed her hand and fought his own tears. His words hurt him so much.

She abruptly stood up from the table and reached out to Alex. She blurted out, all at once, "No way! I don't want you guys to leave! You misunderstand my tears, dear. I am absolutely thrilled for you! I am happy, Alex. I'm so happy to see you happy! I knew it! I've known for a long time. Before you two knew. You've been more than just friends for quite a while, but you were both just too damn stubborn to give it a chance! Oh, thank God you came to your senses! Now come here and give Mama a hug!"

Alex was completely dumbfounded. He definitely had not expected that. He stood up and hugged her so tightly, tears streaming down his face. "Oh, mom. Thank you so much. You don't know the burden you've just lifted off my shoulders. I was so worried you'd hate me."

"Oh, Alex, don't be silly. Always so dramatic." She looked at Ivar, still sitting at the table and watching them in complete shock. "Ivar, get up here and hug Mama Hogh. You've always been my second son, and now, you really are, and I need to let you know how happy you've made me, choosing my son."

Ivar did as he was told, and the three of them stood in a group hug. Ivar, however, fought back his tears. He wasn't that comfortable yet.

They finally sat back down at the table to finish their meal, all smiles. Alex couldn't help his curiosity, so he just asked her flat out, "Mom, what's made you so accepting of this? Of us?"

After thinking for a second, she finally answered him. "Well, aside from the fact that I've always adored Ivar, here, and am happy if you are, I've learned from my own mistakes."

"Meaning?" Alex pressed.

"Well, meaning I couldn't bear to know your heartbreak was my fault again. I should have never told you to leave," and she looked at Ivar nervously, "Umm, to leave her who should not be named back in Paris."

Alex swallowed thickly, and he answered softly, "Mom, you didn't tell me to leave her."

"Well, no," she answered, "But I told you to bring her home with you and that whatever happened, not to stay there but to return home, her by your side if that's what it took. It was selfish of me, sweetheart. I guilted you into returning, probably when you would have chosen to stay. And I will always regret it and will always be deeply sorry I did that to you. I wasn't blind to your heartbreak, and the guilt of knowing it was my fault will always haunt me. I'm so deeply sorry, dear." She dropped her head and placed her hand over Alex's on the table.

He sat in awkward silence for a moment. The memories of everything she'd just mentioned still stung him a bit, he had to admit, but he knew his mom didn't know the entire story. She wasn't entirely to blame, as she thought, but now was not the time to open that can of worms. "Mom, nothing is your fault. There's so much more to that story, and none of it is important now. Don't hold yourself accountable for the good or bad things that have happened in my personal life. I'm just happy you accept Ivar and I, regardless of the reason."

Ivar sat in silence and just continued to listen. He made a mental note to later talk with Alex about this broad in Paris. Should he be worried? He'd thought he knew everything about Alex, but he'd never heard about her, and apparently, she must have been someone he cared a great bit for. But now wasn't the time, so he just listened.

His mom lifted her head and responded to Alex, "Well, that's good to hear, but you understand. And," she glanced over at Ivar, "That's not the only reason I accept you two as a couple. I love Ivar, and I know he's good for you and will make you happy for a very long time if you allow him to." She squeezed Ivar's hand now. "The two of you are the perfect couple, and have you looked in the mirror, dear? You are absolutely glowing! You are radiating love and happiness, and you deserve them both."

They both smiled at her words. Alex's heart skipped a beat as well. He knew she was right, but for her to actually put a name to it surprised him. Love and happiness. Love. That she was able to see how they felt about eachother meant the world to him.

"Wait! Oh my God! Wait until your dad learns of this. He's going to be beside himself that you've finally taken the next step with Ivar, dear. When he sees your happiness, he's going to bubble over. He's said forever that he wanted to see you happy with anyone."

Alex sheepishly began to answer her. "Umm mom? Uh, how do I say this? Umm, Dad already knows."

"What? You told your dad before you told me? Just how difficult do you believe me to be?" she snapped.

"We didn't exactly tell him. Umm, he walked in on us in the garage last weekend." Alex dropped his head as he smiled. Ivar coughed, trying not to laugh.

"What?! Are you serious? The two of you were making love in our garage?" Her mouth gaped open and she covered it with her hand.

"NO! Oh God, mom, no! What do you think we have a bedroom for? Dad walked in on us kissing! That's all, KISSING!" He had to smile, though, that she actually said 'making love.' She really was ok with this.

Ivar could take no more, and he busted out laughing. Nearly in tears, he said, "Well, I don't know, Alex. I could easily bend you over the hood of your dad's Mustang."

At that exact moment, Alex's dad walked through the door. "Hey, guys, umm, wait. What's wrong with the hood of my Mustang?" He looked at the three of them in a complete panic for his car.

"Nothing, dear. These boys are being ridiculous." Alex's mom answered. "Welcome home."

She picked up her napkin from the table and smacked Ivar with it. "Boy, you hush! Now, I'm not that old. I remember what it's like to be all hot and bothered, and you have to take care of business wherever you can, but you better keep the hoods of our cars and the garage out of it! You boys hear me?" And she popped Alex with the same napkin as he threw his arms up in a blocking motion.

"Mom! Please! I don't need to hear you talking about being hot and bothered and taking care of business. Ever. Oh my God." Alex dropped his head into his hands. Ivar just continued laughing.

After making a plate for Thomas as well, the four of them finished their lunch and sat around the table talking and laughing. It was just great and Alex was absolutely overjoyed at his parents' acceptance. His family had always been close and knowing they accepted Ivar as a happy addition meant everything to him. This was so much better than how their weekend had started off.

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"I know you have that exam tomorrow and need to study, but do you think you have time for us to stop by the park on the way back to your place?" Ivar asked Alex as they pulled away from his parents'.

"Yes, I have time. We actually left mom's sooner than I'd expected," Alex answered, curious of the sudden change of plans, "Are you wanting to get a quick jog in?"

"Well, actually, I have a blanket in the trunk, and it's the first nice day in weeks. I'd umm," he blushed, "I'd honestly just like to spend some time with you, just the two of us, by the little stream at the back of the park. If umm, if that sounds ok with you."

Alex was taken back. Where had this side of Ivar been all these years? If this was any indication of how he treated his girlfriends in the past, no wonder all the women seemed to always flock to him. He felt warmth spread throughout his body, and he smiled. "Yes, Ivar, that sounds great. It really has been a long weekend. It will be nice to spend some quality time with you just enjoying your company."

They arrived at the spot Ivar had mentioned and he spread the blanket down. They both laid down, propped up on their arms, facing eachother. "This is such a nice spot, Ivar. Thanks for thinking of this," Alex smiled. He started to lean toward Ivar for a kiss but then realized how many other people were in the park and he refrained.

Ivar noticed this and asked, "What? What stopped you?"

"Well," Alex looked around, "I just didn't feel like defending us yet again. It's too nice of a day for you to end up in a fight."

Ivar laughed, "It's never too nice a day for a good fight, especially if I'm defending my love for you." He placed his hand on the back of Alex's neck and pulled him closer. He breathed in Alex's sweet smell and slowly kissed him, swirling his tongue around Alex's. He pulled away, his forehead resting on Alex's and softly said, "I love you." Nobody around them seemed to care. Nobody said or did anything but kept on about their day. That was so relieving to Alex and he began to feel more comfortable.

They talked and laughed and discussed all the ups and downs of the weekend. They really enjoyed eachother's company, this had always been true, but now that they were together, it just made it all real. They were slowly getting into the swing of things and getting used to what it was to be in a relationship with eachother. It felt so natural to them both, and it seemed that they were finally finding their groove.

Alex saw movement out of the corner of his eye and as hard as it was to look away from Ivar's sparkling eyes, he looked up, over Ivar's shoulder and saw someone walking up the trail behind him. He couldn't see her face because she was looking down at something in her arms, and the sun was shining so brightly, but he was sure it was Katia. He didn't know if she'd spotted them or not but decided he needed to tell Ivar in case she just walked up on them.

"Umm, Ivar?" Alex said.

"Yes, love?"

"Umm, I don't know if she's seen us yet but I'm pretty sure that's Katia walking the trail behind you."

Ivar gulped. He discretely turned around as Alex told him she wasn't looking their way. "Shit. Yes, that's her. What is she carrying?"

"I can't tell," Alex answered, both of them trying to see.

About that time, they saw her stumble and fall down, still holding whatever was in her arms tightly. She yelled and was then quiet.

"Fuck!" Alex yelled, as he quickly got to his feet alongside Ivar. "Did she hit her head?"

They both quickly ran over to her, not stopping to think. "Shit, Ivar," Alex said as he squatted down to Katia, "The side of her head is bleeding!" He looked up at Ivar, standing over Katia in what could only be described as a complete state of shock. "Oh, God! What? What is it?"

About that time, Alex heard what Ivar was looking at in shock. A baby began crying. Alex's heart completely stopped. He raised up to where the sound was coming from and in Katia's locked arms laid a baby girl with thick brown hair. Alex instinctively grabbed her up and out of Katia's arms to search that she was ok and wasn't bleeding anywhere as well.

With his touch, she simmered down some and stopped crying. He began talking to her as if he knew anything about babies, "Are you okay, little one? Are you hurt anywhere?"

She grasped his finger with her hand and said with her baby voice, "Ma-ma," as she looked up at him. Staring up at Alex were a pair of the prettiest, bluest eyes he'd ever seen. Well, the prettiest, bluest ever besides those of Ivar's. And then, it hit him.

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😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

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@istorkyou @vero-maris-zamo @chapada010101010 @lostasalice-thisway @ivarhoegh @lonewolf471 @lemonsarepink @covidinducedsocialreject @tessakate

#ivar the boneless imagine #ivar the boneless smut #ivar the boneless fluff #ivar the boneless fic #alex hogh andersen #alex høgh andersen #alex hoegh andersen #alex hogh andersen smut #alex hogh x ivar the boneless #alex x ivar #friends to lovers

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hongism · 1 year

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hi sooo....

O______O wow...

U DID IT AGAINNNNNNN, im so.. im so shocked reading the new moc chapter and must i say i love ur interim chapters i think theyre so !!!!!!!!!! chefs kiss truly

okokok so im speechless.. but im thinking abt it now and ... (maybe this is also bc i recently jus binged like all of moc in like 3 days so its still fresh on my brain but) the very first chapters when mc was alr on the ship and and there was that one bit with san and they spent the night together and were talking and it was when she still was carrying around the pardon papers and they had like a heart to heart to be there for each other and the cheek kiss !!!!!! if im remembering right.. i remember sans reaction being written kinda awkward initially (ill have to eventually go back and find it) so it- it makes me wonder how fast hongjoong tried to come up w a plan to manipulate mc... also... my heartbroke even reading the prev chapter when mc was crying and telling san "why did u have to make me doubt ur feelings?" and then reading this chapter- i have hope for them i really do but i fear.. whats gonna happen once she finds the truth out bc... ik she will </3 and i fear its gonna be hongjoong.. But also..??? WAIT NO BC IM THINKING 80 MILLION THINGS RN.

THE DIALOGUE W MINGI........ MINGI AND MINHO..... minho being shocked that his intelligence is more than he lets on.... ITS MAKING ME WONDER LIKE... theyve all kinda treated mingi like Oh he's helpless or struggling rather, we need to care for him diligently-which is true, bro got demons fr but... then im wondering how much mingi really knows bc...?? i remember mingi saying smth to mc too about like "ask urself why it is that ur even trying to disobey in the first place?" or like idk they had that deep ass talk and.... idk.. im thinking abt it now though... what does mingi know.......

im also wondering... 1) if joong has a conscious LOL 2) no i definitely think he does after this but,,,,,,,,, we still dunno WHY he's become this way- why his demons are like this/why theyre presented this way bc in a way (LOL ME TRYNNA PSYCHOANALYZE HIM)... it seems like he keeps everyone at an arms length... except seonghwa i feel like.. at least for now.. but i saw that because he keeps to himself a lot even amongst the ship- so it seems... but he definitely changes the way he wants to come across people... 3) idk if i wanna hug him and tell him its gonna be alright or if i wanna box him LMFAOOO he is so damn crazy... and then jus the way minho described the way they played chess... everyone else doing his dealing... actually now that im thinking about it.. he's been called out quite easily before... so maybe he isnt as hard to read as he thought... in fact ik mc has been the one to call him out hella on his shit so.. i wonder if thats why he's so adamant on keeping her in shape.... oh joong ... babes what did u go thru 🤣🤣🤣🙁🙁🙁 u lil control freak u~~

anywho.. im also confused.... bc i can see that mc does wanna be approved and accepted (?) by joong yet also cant stand the authority he gives so its quite the paradox.........

rn im jus ranting sm... its like everythings clicking..

but also.. im curious.. hongjoong has only lost chess to yeosang among all the members... yet.. seonghwa is the lit. which ofc im gonna assume its also him being a siren that like he said "the closer he is to me the better".. but then if yeosang thought most like joong... why is yeosang just a pawn in joongs eyes ...? yeosang losing the wooyoung </3 lordddd i dont even wanna start... then minho saying he's excited to see how another crew member plays.. joong immediately thinking seonghwa... but interestingly enough im guessing its either san or yunho.. but my best bet is san given he's like another right hand man kinda guy to joong...

ill conclude on that note since its 3am rn... but wow U DID IT AGAINNNNN i love ur writing so much seriously <33333 thank u thank u thank u and im excited for more x

hi hehe :3 i'm so thrilled that you enjoy the interims that's such a relief and so nice to hear ;-;;

you're in the perfect position bc you remember what happened early on and can pick up on the crumbs i was dropping to make it alllll come full circle! what goes around comes around! not only are hongjoong's plans important to consider (ie when he implemented them, when he put them into action) but also both how san carried out his initial duty and when san started to slip away from that duty into something genuine! both those things will be explored and opened up in san's upcoming interim, that will help pull all the pieces together i hope so!! that scene with mc crying to san,,, i cried writing it and i know it made a lot of people doubt san and his feelings but!! please have hope!! there are SOOO many possibilities!! will hongjoong really leave san to lie in the grave he dug for himself or will he dig it deeper or try to help him out…? all remains to be seen :3

mingi is truly truly such a fun and fascinating character to both write and unveil to you guys ;-; he's exceptionally intelligent beyond the scope of understanding emotions period but he gets treated like he's dumber because he doesn't understand emotions bc in the others' eyes emotions are just simple and easy to understand. mingi def possesses a different kind of intelligence but that kind of intelligence is on the same level of yeosang iw ould say! so it's easiest to think of it as mingi has a different kind of smartness compared to someone like say,,,,jongho or san who both have very good and high emotional intelligence!

1) DOES the man have a conscience? this interim is very telling in that regard and his thought process and the what some would call "intrusive thoughts" really showcase who he is as a person!

2) there are so many layers to him and you really get it bc he does keep everyone at arms length, even seonghwa to some degree bc the whole reason him and seonghwa aren't together is bc hongjoong shut him down the moment seonghwa started expressing his feelings towards hongjoong, he likes to keep to himself and doesn't like to leave his space for many reasons but we now know that one of those reasons is the past feelings of failure and loss coming back to haunt him, and bingo right on the money, he changes the way he wants to come across to people. prime example in yunho at the end of the interim, i think that scene is the absolute best showcase of hongjoong's character and who he is and how he operates.

3) he is DAMN CRAZY!!! i feel like i haven't so much shown that to the degrees that his character really is batshit insane so we're tiptoeing into those waters more now. you do have to think though, with the notion that he changes the way he wants to come across to people, when he's being "called out", is it accurate? or is it what hongjoong is presenting so they think they know what kind of person he is? when mc calls him out on his shit, it's often a two way punch where it as much about her as it is about him so much to think about! he's far far beyond a control freak tehe :3

the fun paradox in mc is that dynamic of wanting to be approved and accepted by him but also having this point blank issue with authority and also how hongjoong excises his authority. and that's been a big point of confusion too i think so im trying to delve more into it and expose more of it so that it makes more sense but there is meant to be a contradiction in her actions for sure

yeosang has been the only one to beat hj at chess, and he is not the lieutenant. we know that hongjoong personally selected seonghwa before yeosang joined the crew and that the position has never swayed, and we also know that yeosang is the master strategist on the crew, which is something a lieutenant would usually take care of so it lends to some questions about how hongjoong views authority in his crew? as far as the chess game goes, his queen was indeed seonghwa, the main bishop he used to both attack and sabotage his own pieces was san, he himself was king, then though not as heavily touched on, the other pieces i had in mind were: mingi and jongho were both knights, yeosang was the other bishop, then mc, wooyoung, and yunho were pawns. who minho was really referring to ;) is quite the twist but a fun one :3

bless you for sending me such a long ask at such a late hour you're so sweet ;-; it made my day i was so happy and excited seeing it thank you for letting me ramble right back at you :3 <3

#moc: spoilers

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nani-nonny · 8 months

Note

YAY NEW CHAPTER LET'S GOOOO!!!

The way reunion rest his elbow on LCD is something i hated as kid because most my classmate did to me and it hurt my shoulder.

When WDS asked if everyone can't use their portals i just looked at DMD and thought " YEAH! Who wants to tell them? "🤣

“ Mierda… not only are we missing limbs but the most useful weapon at our disposal.” lol i was about to make a list of things they have and things they're also missing xD

I kid you not when WDS explained i was speechless for a moment until i finally remembered he has a ghost future Donnie with him!

When Donnie gave the map and food and said " you have 10 days " i was wondering if they're gonna be able to find lil leo in 10 or less... (Hopefully less)

I just saw LCD slap mikey's hand and DMD immediately jumped to stap him, i immediately screamed " GOD DAMMIT IT DMD CHILL! CHILL!! " not few minutes and he went gangster mode!!

Mikey explaining he wanted to heal LCD was like someone trying to talk through sea of people fighting each other and you just can't hear him!

And LCD asking in low, shaky voice broke my heart more, when you're gonna stop Nani?! 😢

BLUE WAS ABOUT TO STEP IN AND TURN THIS SCHOOL FIGHT TO WEDDING DRAMA FIGHT UNTIL REUNION STEPPED IN AND SAID GTA MEME " Hey hey hey! It's me! Chill chill!! " OH LORD THIS ISN'T GOOD FOR LCD!!

I had to stop and look up " ornamental bead " because i was hella confused what it was, was it like good luck charm?! But he woke up to dumpster fire! (And made meme about it)

And reunion i s STILL holding LCD down oh my lord am SCARED FOR HIM (LCD) if this was from just slapping mikey's hand what will happen if his crimes came to light?!?! (Am sorry am pestering you about LCD's crimes but am just... NERVOUS!!)

I don't know where LCD's " i don't have to answer your question " guts came from but maybe from getting protection by reunion and mikey and Donnie.

When reunion (damn i realized how fitting his name is) said to keep stories to campfire i was worried; is that where he's gonna be exposed?! Is the others gonna kick him out of the camp?!

“This is the best option we have to keep watch over him and away from the others. Hold it in for now.” oh my lord YOU'RE GIVING ME PANIC ATTACK NANI!! NANI!! THIS LOOKS LIKE A SOAP OPERA SHOW TO ME!! OH MY GOD!!

Donnie's explaining about the layout got me excited; poison area only humans are affected to them?! And traveling by night? I think this's LCD's specialty!

When i saw the " inhaler " i thought what IF LCD got poisoned and it was up to WDS or DMD to save him?

Donnie's 'i'll be waiting for you' got my heart aww! Twin brother!

Mikey asking for a hug and the way reunion is so open about it is making me happy and giddy!👌🏻 i also laughed at how he's the oldest yet the childish out of them with his " can i stay? "

Man Mikey's getting ALL the hugs!! Well.. Except LCD, YIKES! And it's a nice end when reunion says " blue team assembled!!🤣

Reunion’s just being a little shit like Leos tend to be(/j) and still hasn’t broken the habit of leaning on everyone hahaha!

*stares at WDS, Reunion, and DMD* anyone got something to share with the class? Hmmm? Something about those damn portals! Hhmmmm?

WDS was getting annoyed by ghost Donnie constantly correcting him in his ear, he had to say at least one thing that’s accurate.

I think it was the final chapter where DMD promised that nothing is ever going to happen to the p!turtles and that definitely sticks throughout alternate universes hahah! LCD obviously didn’t get the memo when he panicked and I’ll never stop hurting the sad man!!! /j

The meme!!! Big Blue really got hit with a distraction thanks to Raphy, and the charm is more to remind Big Blue that they’re family. And the family isn’t complete without their Leos, including the saddest blue. Such a sweet little moment amongst the chaos hahah!

Reunion is definitely going to fish out some details from the Leos’ backgrounds, he’s a nosy little guy! Campfires are meant for story time and bonding!

And I live for the theatre! Pizzazz! Eating up the drama, delish

Reunion being all giddy like a child is honestly so adorable, and it’s nice knowing he’s the most Leo out of all of them :)

The Blue Team is out on their first mission: recruit a fifth member /j

#I’m blue… da ba dee da…#nani nonny answers #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt future leo #rottmnt fanfiction

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foreverinthepagesofhistoryy · 3 months

Note

I’ve barely begun on the next chapter😭😭 and thought I would send you a sneak peek. 🤣 a lot will happen both plot wise, but it will be more focused on the vologarian monarchy for this bit. But I just had to send this in solely because I wrote Peter….and I still cannot stand him😭 this chapter will be out quite late I am afraid, but I know you are also equally as busy so I thank you for your patience.

I just love the fact that Alix is so done with Peter in this….

Alix is halfway up to her fathers office when she stops in her tracks, eyes taking in Peter as he sits on the wooden chairs outside their fathers office. Alix first instinct upon seeing her brother is to turn back as swiftly as she can, hoping he hadn’t caught sight of her and leave as fast as she can. she has no intention of speaking to Peter, in fact ever since that argument in the car they hadn’t spoken. Before Alix could make her swift exit Peter’s eyes caught hers, his blue eyes were wide and mouth agape as he took in his sister, he immediately stood, smiling wide at her. Alix inwardly cursed, he had the gall to smile at her. Him. After he had caused her so much grief and pain. After all Alix was sure this meeting was to talk about his recent escapades, and how to clean them up. It made her sick, both physically and emotionally.

It was then that Alix let her eyes really take in Peter. His complexion had changed since she last saw him, his usual paleness and gaunt expression gone; replaced by an almost sun kissed complexion, as if he had been in some remote island of the Pacific. But it wasn’t his complexion that made Alix’s ears burn red, it was his attire. Ever since Infancy Alix and Peter had prided themselves on being grandchildren of the king, and then upon their fathers accession children of the king. That meant when you walked into the kings office, you were smart, your clothes were proper and efficient.

What Peter dawned was the opposite, hair unwashed in an Adidas tracksuit and Birks. With his fucking uncut toenails.

Alix couldn’t help herself as she muttered You’ve got to be kidding.” Peter catches the end of the statement, his wide smile gone, blue eyes paling as he takes in his sister’s judgmental gawks. He looks pained, almost embarrassed. In retaliation he points to her attire.

It is then that Alix realizes she had not changed from her outing with the horses this morning. She had landed after leaving the borbons on a flight that lasted just three short hours. Had made it back for supper, and to her astonishment her father was still on his last engagement. So Alix had sat and ate with the servants, her mother supposedly out. After recalling the servants with her tales, and inquiring about their family, Alix had set of on a ride around the grounds. She supposed she should have changed from her tailcoat riding suit.

Peter balks with a scoff—“Oh, like you look any better, fucking clown suit.”

Before Alix can retaliate with a better comeback the office door opens and their father stands in the doorway. His stature large and looming over them with a gaze akin to fire. Menacingly eyeing Peter with a glare that makes him take a minuscule step back. “What is the meaning of this disrespectful attitudes you harbor for one another?” He barks out, his voice loud enough it makes even Alix shrink back.

Peter remains the stiff boy he always had been, and Alix doesn’t know how it took her so long to view him like so. She had always, always held him high regard, her companion for life, but now as she watches him, watches how he glares at her with such animosity she finds she is the one being blamed.

“Papa you made mention of HER being here in your call yesterday” Peter speaks, and Alix feels her heart break as he says it. So much so that Alix can’t help but let the words ring out. She really should refrain herself.

“Papa, you didn’t mention that Peter would be here, surly he should be out wasting our money and disappointing our people with his spineless childish behavior, perhaps we should give him a bid for fear he will make a bigger mess than he already has”

Alix thinks she can see her father stifle a small smile. But it’s to fast to register.

I will say I have a lot of research for this chapter and I hope it surprises you in a good way….although one can never know what lurks in the shadows🤭🤭….as always, I wish you a wonderful week!!❤️-🇪🇸

That little brat…

Anyway I think we all know what is coming up and this piece is just amazing, Peter sucks as always, someone needs to restrain me before I throw him off the edge of the universe, but yeah this is amazing!

Keep up the great work and sorry this took so long to answer! 🤍

#answered ask #wotc #whispers of the crown #leonalix #leonalix fic

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simpingwriter · 1 year

Text

Cal Kestis x Kyra Yarmot

'In the Name of Love' pt.7

A/N: sorry for taking this long...but this has the length of nearly !4! Regular chapters of mine...so if we think that way, I have been posting relatively regularly...just not publicly 🤣

I decided to post everything at once, despite me going to be in obvious mental peril at the end of editing this doorstopper today next week (by writing this edit)💀

Let's hope I didn't fuck up too badly in the 2nd edit...

Enjoy! :)

Word Count: approx. 11.000 Words

(Pre-Edit me: Kill me now-)

(Post-Edit me: Great now I am crying again.)

___________________

It's only on your slow way back to the Mantis that you see the actually quite notable limp in Cal's step. How did you not see that sooner, what kind of horrible…person he seems to like…are you?!

"You're hurt!" You exclaimed shook, immediately putting an arm out to stop him from further walking away. The Town was still basically deserted with the shoot out just a few minutes old, the streets were quiet and only you two were left within the bodies of the Bounty Hunters. Clearly they did mess with the wrong people, not the other way around.

"It's fine, we got bacta cream and patches stocked up well last month, don't you remember? You had such fun with the fizzy drink stand!"

And even with his assuring tone, you didn't move from your spot, eyes trained intently on the wound you somehow only saw now. A blaster bolt had grazed his calf, searing through his pants way too easily. You felt terrible with the knowledge that you let him get hurt because of your awful need to get revenge, all because you tend to forget that others didn't have your armored scales. Most species didn't have them.

"Listen, this will be patched up in no time, you know Merrin is good at-" No. Not Merrin.

Always it was her fixing your wounds – mainly his due to previously mentioned reasons – because she insisted on doing it for you two, which your surprisingly lazy ass definitely wouldn't complain about in normal circumstances, but the thing you had with Cal was no normal circumstances! And then...then you always would have to watch her undress his Ponchos and shirts, even watch him take his pants off...for her…She got to touch him in ways even you hadn't yet and you couldn't even openly voice your – clearly not allowed – feelings!

But now you're alone with him for once, again.

"I want to take care of your wound…I was the reason you got hurt in the first place, so I should have to help you with it. N-not Merrin…please." Why did he even have to agree to her help? Couldn't he have just told her that you are wrapping his wounds? They weren't that many either, usually!

It must've been written all over your face, your sour, bitter thoughts – Which Merrin didn't even deserve in the long run, she became your only female friend! – doing rapid rounds through your head as he tilts his head, starting to grin, "Are you jealous of Merrin?" "What?! No! N-never! I…I just…" You dug your own hole deeper – metaphorical Claws making it even easier – with every failed try to explain your thoughts as he went to cup your face in one of his hands, circling his calloused thumb over your scaly skin gently, "It's alright if you are, Kyra…though there is nothing to be jealous about in the end, you know that, right?" You leaned into his impulsive gentle caress almost instantly by instinct, craving his touch like it kept you alive, a low, content growl showing your slowly easing worry.

"I do know…but, but she…she got to see you in ways not even I have yet, Cal…" you finally decided to spill your selfish reason, knowing it wasn't fair to Cal to just keep the reason to yourself while he has no idea why you were even acting jealous in the first place. What you didn't expect was for him to chuckle deeply at your – in your eyes – embarrassing confession, his former gentle caress turned into him slightly forcing you to look up at him.

"Has anyone ever told you that you look adorable when you're starting to go all green-eyed for me?" No. No one ever has, you never had anybody to even get jealous over like you seemed to get with Cal.

No one had ever made you feel any of these things like he did. Jealousy, a new kind of fear, a new kind of anger but most importantly…your most general happiness began to feel differently around him.

You quietly shook your head at him, his sudden change in demeanor silencing you as he closed the small height difference to lean down next to your flushed ear. "Then why don't you prove to me that you're better at patching me up, my sweet Dragonfly?" Shivers.

And yet, despite your mental whiplash, you slowly nod.

Without checking out the surroundings much, he led you two towards the back of one of the many sandstone houses, still limping badly until he finally got to lean against it, sighing out exhausted.

"Shit, I didn't even think to ask if you got some First Aid with you-" "I can use some parts of my shirt, it got a hole during the fight anyways…" you mumble quietly, partially still trying to make sense of the tone alone his former words held. They sounded so strange and different coming from him in particular. But you liked it. A lot. You knew you wouldn't be able to go to bed without thinking about this moment at least twice tonight, feeling your legs rub together subconsciously.

For a split second, you had been certain, he blushed at your comment, but he shook it off much quicker than usually, once again leaving you as the only one of the two of you that resembled a Camby Berry. You pulled a grimace at the wound, fortunately really just a graze shot. Meaning your emergency Bacta Spray would be more than enough for today if you covered it with a bandage of your shirt and afterwards ask BD to give him a stim from his compartment.

Using your claws ever so carefully, you slice his pants leg open at the side – though just high enough to get to his wound – hearing a slight murmur of complaint. You knew he had just bought those last week, but you would be able to fix them easily, you cut them at the seams and not dead in the middle of the fabric.

"This could sting for a second-" "Karking Hell!" He shouts out with the first layer of mist the spray hits the burnt wound with as you clearly lied a bit. Bacta spray hurts like bad ass, unlike regular Bacta Cream. But it was most reliable on wounds that needed quick patching up.

The second and third layer could no longer hurt, the first layer covering the exposed wound already fully. The others were there to simply reinforce the strength of the hardening healing mass, it's basically a spray-on bacta patch without the patch.

"This was more than a sting, Kyra!" "Didn't tell you what that sting would feel like, did I?" You return smugly now as well, raising the sharp tip of your tail for extra emphasis as he grunts.

"And there I thought you were going to be a good Dragonfly for me…" He states back similarly as you felt his eyes bore into your skull as he quietly watched you working on his leg.

Grabbing your already ripped shirt, you took a good part of it between your hands and your fangs, using your claws to rip further through it, a nice strip now left. And basically nothing to cover you up.

You could swear he heard your immediately following thoughts, a chuckle coming from above you, "Wanted to recover what we couldn't finish this morning, Kyra?" "S-shut up, I need to concentrate!" That was also a lie, all that was left was to wrap his calf to keep the still clearly wet-ish Bacta Spray from sticking to everything – S a n d . . . – he would touch in the next hours.

Like apparently you.

As soon as you were finished, you felt his hands at your upper arms, pulling you back to stand in front of him, "Maybe you're right." He muses with a grin still very unfamiliar to you, "Maybe I should let you patch me up much more often in future…"

That would be nice…that's all you wanted. To have him see your worth in all aspects.

You wanted to help him. Just like he wanted to help you.

You were pulled from your thoughts that were parading your win as you felt his hot breath on your lips, "You haven't been hurt as well, by any chance?" Before connecting his lips with yours in a heated kiss, starting out that way already by his choice for a chance. And again you felt it, whenever you kissed, you felt this unique connection between you two, tethering you two to each other for longer than you usually planned.

Something you hadn't felt with any other Force Sensitive, something no simple touch or even hug could even dream to simulate. They gave you this ultimate feeling of being at true ease, like everything would be alright eventually, even if just for these exact few moments.

They made it hard to think straight, intoxicated you and your usually clear view on things. They obscured the supposed rules, rules that could no longer be enforced by a council.

So when you once again felt his ever-curious hands travel downwards, all in the "privacy" of a desolate sand town, you didn't hesitate to encourage him to go on, to map you with his hands. No hushed warnings, no worries of being caught by the others for taking too long to do something in your room or being too loud…

"You're not…stopping me?" He also noticed, hand currently going under the rest of your shirt to feel how hot your skin currently was. Always has been a pretty good indicator of your own desire. "N-no. I don't want…to stop you…" you confess whenever he gives you two space to talk and breath between kisses, getting sloppy as both of you lost care about how you looked while sharing this intimate moment.

"Wasn't it you who...talked about a certain... set of rules many... many Rotations ago?" He teased, pulling at the clips that held your bra together with a too-innocent-to-be smile pressed against yours. That alone made you whine, silenced with another kiss, the anticipation alone having you on edge, pressing yourself closer to his own burning up body as you felt your panties grow damp.

"Makers, kark the damned rules…" you whine out, your own claws trying to pull his Poncho off and over his head, which he was as kind as to help you along. Soon, the poncho, his shirt and your shirt were disposed and forgotten about on the ground, collecting sand to be even further complained about later. "We're going to get sunburned because of you…" You groan as your eyes rake over his slightly scarred and freckled upper body. Nothing entirely new to you, since he slept in boxer shorts and he just liked it a lot to wake you up in nothing but them.

You smiled at the memory of the feeling his small – much more innocent – pecks on your still sleepy lips gave you in the morning.

Months ago you wouldn't have dreamed of such mornings, you would've been happy to simply not wake up drenched in rain water because a cave wasn't as dry as you had initially thought…

"Any sunburn is worth it if I get to spend such a special moment with you, little Dragonfly…" He promised as his hands returned to fumble with your pesky bra. That's where his and your inexperience clearly showed, but neither of you cared all that much about that, your hands brushing his away for a moment. You feel the heat continue rising in your cheeks when his bigger hands begin to rest at your now fully exposed hips, fingertips kneading into your soft skin after he slipped his glove off to feel you better.

"There." With that small – theoretically meaningless – word, the sides of your hips had been momentarily abandoned to strip you off that pesky little clothed cage, also getting thrown onto the growing heap of clothes behind him as he stopped for just a moment. "You're staring…"

"I'm not staring. I'm admiring what is mine."

Admiring.

Admiring what is…his.

It took everything in your strength to not throw yourself at him for this comment, the unfamiliar heat in your body starting to concentrate more and more in your lower abdomen. You knew what it actually meant, that...feeling, but never had it felt so breathtakingly real before. As if you could grasp it with your physical hands, knowing that is was as real as your strength in the Force.

"I am yours, Cal" you return, accepting him thoughtlessly, watching a satisfied look creep onto his face, hands slowly sliding towards your sensitive mounds. At the first contact, searing skin against even worse searing skin, you bite down on your lower lip, feeling your blood bead at the broken skin. If he made you feel like this with a mere touch in such a "simple" area…how would he make you feel if he…

"All in due time…" He whispers against the shell of your ear and now you are certain: he could somehow hear your thoughts. But why couldn't you hear his? "Because you shouldn't have to know what kind of...sinful...thoughts I have about you and me right now, Kyra…" He admits and he sounds noticeably ashamed, for these thoughts, you guess.

And you could think why, as well. Years and years, you're taught to not get attached. Certainly not to have a relationship with one another…and now you're on the brink of truly breaking any and every rule talking about this behavior. You would walk a wrong path…of a way that was about to break under your feet either way.

Staring up into his clouded green eyes, you tried to find the right words. And eventually you found them, finding them easier than you had expected, "Whatever you're thinking about wanting to do with or to me today, right now...and any day in the future…I want it too…there is nothing to be asha- Cal!"

You hadn't even managed to finish your sentence, when you started hearing the thoughts he worried about, currently running freely and wildly through his head as you talked to him and you knew was going over all the things that could happen...

His "bad intrusive thoughts" won...

In seconds, he had you pressed against the wall of the house now instead – causing you to shout his name in surprise – pinning you up against it. Both of you knew you could easily overpower him if need be, but you also both seemed to just know perfectly well that you wouldn't.

You wanted this. You wanted him to lead you.

"Are you really sure about this, Kyra? I don't know if I can stop myself once I let go…" He was at the brink of panting, sharply exhaling as his blown wide eyes wander back downwards to your exposed, heaving chest. And suddenly all you heard, was what he wanted to do to them.

How he wanted to knead them, feel them, taste them. He wanted to worship them and everything else about you. He wanted to since the beginning, the thoughts growing stronger and harder to resist with the time you spent together, in each other's arms and company.

"Then don't hold back, Cal. We held back for the longest time, so don't just tell me, show me how badly you want to make me yours...and yours alone, please…" You tried not to quiver almost pathetically with your voice, not from fear but from the anticipation. Was he going to be gentle? Would he take you for himself roughly even, like a dragon's mate once upon a time was supposed to?

Was he going to lose himself for his own pleasure as well…or would he only care about you?

You wanted him to feel good.

He deserves pleasure, he deserves happiness...

"Do I really though?" "Yes you do, Cal."

And his head dips down, his hands kept a tight lock on your hands, restraining you from touching him back as his lips first grazed the soft scaled skin of your chest. At first, they were unsure, gentle. Then he seemed to get ahold of himself, fully relishing in this sadly rare moment.

He bit into your gentle flesh, sucked small markings all over them, leaving trails of his saliva, all while he kept your squirming body in check. Your tail wildly swished around under you two, throwing around dirt and sand as you – for the first time in your life – felt the astonishing pleasure of another person touching one of your most sensitive places, especially with such concentration and devotion for it.

Your hands simply couldn't do the same magic he somehow naturally had, letting them limply hang against nothing as he switched into holding you with the Force alone now. You trusted him with your life, it came to you in that very moment. You would let him restrain you in the most dangerous places and situations…you would blindly trust him.

"M-more, Cal. Maker's please!" You moan into the arid desert air, pushing outwards to feel more of him on your touch starved body, obsecene mewls and moans rolling from your lips with surprising ease, even though they had been nearly unfamiliar to you up to this day. "Only if you let me hear your divine lips sing some more." And thankfully you didn't have to hold back all the way out here, free to give into whatever he wanted and asked from you.

No one would see you two break the rules. Just like at the start of everything.

"Right here?" He asks cautious, his slightly calloused hands now wandering your – for them still foreign – surface, the strange feeling your hardened but currently not sharp scales gave him only spurring him on. "Where else?" Your answer was just as short, unfortunately only able to view his body instead of touching it. But that didn't mean you couldn't catalog every. single. scar. he had to show.

You wondered where they all came from, if they all had their own stories? Which came from training, which came from actually dangerous combat? Are they still sensitive…did they maybe still hurt him?

"Do they still hurt?" "Some of them…but nothing I can die from. Not anymore." He knew immediately what you meant, this weird new connection you two had going keeping both of you from using too many words, relying on being able to hear each other's thoughts when the other let you.

Once he was done mapping your own little scars and different looking scales to his mind, humming at every new oddly placed scales he found, he went further down.

He felt the same way as you. He didn't expect to be here today, happier than he was months ago. And yet…you felt something odd and caged off swirling in his thoughts and feelings. He wasn't able to be as happy as he wanted to be for you.

Something had been bothering him greatly...

But you would ask him once you both had your fill of being horrible horrible Jedi.

"I didn't know your tail was this tied up in your pants, Kyra…" He mutters almost sheepishly, if it weren't for the fact that he doesn't sound much like the boyish Cal you know right now. Impatiently, you gently tug at his invisible grip, even if just to untie the laces at the back of your pants to help him out. But he didn't budge, his Force gripping you even harder to keep the message very clear. This was him in control today.

For once... you didn't have to be strong and demanding...

For once, you're getting guidance again.

Albeit quite different to what old you were used to.

"I got this, don't worry. I will even tie them back up for you afterwards…" As he said those words, you feel your pants already fall down to your knees. When you have a tail your size, the only thing holding everything up was whatever covered your tail as well, you basically wore reversed pants...

He helped you step out of them, pushing your heavy combat boots off right along to free your also clawed and scaly feet. The heat of the desert planet was slightly caught by the white-yellow wall you're being pushed against, but it didn't really help with the burning hot ground.

It didn't help shit.

While your feet – covered in special, more hardened scales – didn't pick up the full heat of the sand like the average human's feet, you definitely weren't comfortable either with standing on it as you wince out, trying to stand on your clawed toes instead and failing miserably when they just dug down, causing your unfortunate toes to get enveloped by nothing but almost scalding grains of sand. You never regretted a move quicker than that one.

"That hot?" You nod without much thought, the ability to talk leaving you with your head aimed at the realization that you were absolutely bare in front of him right now, in the middle of a desert.

Just like nature had made you.

____

"You're beautiful…" He remarks almost breathless, leaving you squirming on your padded feet for a moment, just to take a wide enough step back. He admired you as a whole now, took your strong, endlessly trained and yet still very feminine figure and exotic appearance in like you're one of these way too expensive paintings in the Museums in Coruscant…

"To me, those paintings are boring and utter garbage against you." He states quite bluntly before coming closer again, planting his chapped lips roughly on your equally dry lips – a simple feature that never really mattered to each of you – satisfying the building hunger of your lips on his within moments of his demand. Whatever went over him…over you…you enjoyed every forbidden second of it like it was the last time ever and you wished this moment would never have to end.

Until of course the uncomfortable situation at your feet had to return you to the current position you were caged into, just as he began to take off the belt of his own pants. Something that looks so innocent every "evening" you two went to your beds, the partition by now seen much less strict for you two, more decorative than anything now. But in this moment, it makes your face burn even brighter than ever before. Because now you were acutely aware of what would follow and it wasn't going to be these mostly innocent cuddles on his or your bed.

This would be much more. Today…today he would really show you how much he trusted you. And how much you trusted him.

Enough to bond with each other on a deeply physical level.

And not just physically, in the end, it was also an emotional bond, at least for your kind. No other "mate" would ever be like your first again…

"Then I'll have to make sure you won't regret your decision, my Dragonfly…" He throws the pants and shoes where everything else had gone in these hasty last moments, visibly enjoying your struggle of not immediately letting your hungry eyes wander below the belt. "I won't, Cal. I would never."

Your concentration on his eyes started to fail you more and more as your ears picked up the low groan from deep within his throat. His arm moved up and down as you could only take "a wild guess" what exactly he was doing further down, but of course you knew exactly what he was doing. He was preparing himself for you. So this was really happening…you only ever saw it on the HoloNet, when you dared to watch the various adult movies you could find with a detailed enough search. It always ended with your fingers carefully maneuvering deeply in your sleeping pants and even deeper within your most sensitive spot – feeling the effect you had on yourself via the wet pools afterwards – biting into your pillow to muffle your filthy moans. Your body was so incredibly sensitive, even to your own touch, so it was nearly impossible to keep it a secret from Cal during the nights you did touch yourself. Your reactive tail wasn't exactly helping with that either, having to pin it down with your feet to keep the tip from banging against the metal walls of the Mantis.

You remember theses special looks the actors gave each other, how they held such raw animalistic energy even though they were nothing but ordinary humans.

Now, as he slowly stroked himself and he kept his eyes trained on certain spots of your body, you found the exact same type of energy in them. He really wanted you, almost three months of him and you having to wait for enough privacy and the right moment did that to him and not only him.

Unfortunately, until now, these moments were rare and scarce, so you usually used them to find peace in the quiet and the other's comfort and presence instead even imagining exploring each other's bodies like this, both of you too embarrassed to find out if the other even felt the same taboo need inside of them.

And when you eventually naturally got to that point during some make outs, it was always interrupted, ending said moment of privacy immediately…

Often, these interruptions left you both feeling miserable, grumpy and on edge for the rest of the "day" and potential mission, something that didn't always slide past the rest of your team. Once Merrin even asked if you two had a fight, mentioning the raw "angry" eyes you threw at each other.

It never was anger.

It was raw lust that shortly after it dared to show in each of you, had to be forced back down, each interruption painfully reminded the two of you about how deeply wrong your attraction to each other was and for some perverted reason, it drew you two even closer.

And so with every interruption that followed the next, you felt something searing hot coil up more and more inside of you, something you thought was annoyance towards the interruption. It took a whole ass while for you to realize that it was a build up of literal need instead.

So finally, you got the courage to pan downwards, your lower lip immediately falling down at what you saw. Cal grunted prideful at your not so secret gasp, laughing airily until another aroused gasp forced said laugh into the background, "I take that you like what you see?"

Caught off guard, you just nod in innocent awe, a stray piece of your black hair falling into your face as you could only stare now. Precum long started running down the reddish tip of his cock, the rest being spread across his length as he got himself further hard. It didn't seem like such a feat, soon finding him removing his hand, leaving you to take him in without obstruction. He wasn't as big as those from the adult movies, but you were quite aware that they were usually artificially altered to be longer.

Cal's was as real as it could get, now that he no longer held it, twitching freely and eagerly in the open desert air. His cock was maybe…5 or 6 inches, looking pretty huge to inexperienced you, never having had anything beyond said artificially enhanced ones to compare to…

"Are you ready?"

From what you saw in some of these movies, something called foreplay was commonly supposed to come first…but that would take you two more time, time you didn't want to waste anymore. Who karking knew when they would comm the both of you to make sure you're not dead?

No matter that…you could no longer wait either way, you needed him.

You didn't want to wait even longer!

"Yes, yes I am, Cal. Please…please, I need you!" You beg shamelessly, the burning sand against and between your feet about to be pushed into the back of your mind, immediately rushing to memorize the pattern of his hands coming back down to your hips. His right one was really sticky now, the reason as obvious to you as the heat of the air around you. "Then jump…" What- "I'll catch you, there is absolutely no way I will drop you, Kyra…"

How did he know…does he also watch…

You decide to keep that question also for later on, instead not wanting to let him and you wait any longer by following his order without any further questions, jumping off the ground with enough airtime, relieved to no longer having to endure the hot ground underneath. Now the sweltering air was left as the only nuisance, the two suns high above you now burning right atop of you. The memories of today would hurt a bit more than a graze wound with bacta spray.

Cal times your jump perfectly, the hands on your hips swiftly going under your thighs, pulling your already sweaty bodies against each other in one fluid motion. He was almost a natural, you thought as he buried his head in your neck, nibbling on the scaled body part of yours. He couldn't exactly leave bite marks on them, that was your kind of luck. Only at your collarbone perhaps, if he worked on it for long enough.

But there was no time for him marking you, not today, probably not for a long time again afterwards. Every minute wasted was a minute less for him to finally feel all of you and other way around.

For him to ultimately claim you as his.

The first thing you felt of him was the tip as he began to rut against your by now wet with arousal entrance with an eagerness you only knew of him when he was karking hungry at breakfast till today. The friction alone felt like the most forbidden thing to do and yet still...your body reacts to his, rocking back just as needy, a small whine and some pants intermixed at this small but meaningful physical contact. There, held ever so tightly against his bare chest – for once absolutely nothing stuck between the two of you, no bothering bra, top or bedsheets – you felt his heartbeat, quick and strong. "Yours isn't any different…it almost feels like a gentle drum against my chest…"

The way he shared all the things he felt with or because of you…

"I can't wait any longer…Cal…I want- need to feel you!" When he had no smart comment about how you were feeling him already the whole time, you knew he was ready to give you what you requested, the tip of his cock twitching against your virgin folds at your unusually weak, trembling voice, begging him. He knew no other boy had heard you speak like that to them, never would, either. You showed your unguarded self only to him...

Clearly being done with teasing your entrance, not able to hold back himself as well, he shoves your not all too light body up in his grip as you feel him bare his clenched teeth against the same place he just bit at, groaning frustrated at just how long it really took both of you to get to this point today.

And by now, like an old routine, he whispers the same words you asked him months ago, "You know this is against the rules, right?", just to push himself into you without any more preparations or preemptive warnings, bottoming out for the very first time.

Although…this recurring question was you two's kind of warning by now, falling off either of your lips whenever you dreaded further and further down the path of broken rules, leaving the old teachings you both had been taught behind more and more. What even happened to promising to share only these chaste kisses like back then?

What did you two come to?

At the sudden, deep and extremely unfamiliar penetration, you loudly cry out his name, drawing out every vocal of his short name, no one stopping you apart from yourself a few seconds later. Feeling yourself instinctively clenching your fangs and teeth as tears dreaded to well up at this new intrusive feeling inside of you, it didn't feel bad, unlike one might think looking at your current unreadable expression, especially unlike many said on the Holonet. Everyone said the first time is supposed to hurt, even just a bit...but you felt no pain. Instead, a foreign version of bliss filled you.

And once again…this was nothing like your fingers touching yourself, this was…this was so much different! And he felt the same exact way, stilling inside of your clenching lower half as he pushed both of you against the wall to keep the wavering balance up, feeling his grip on your wrists falter more and more by the second. He just couldn't hold it up anymore, you felt so karking incredible around him!

"S-shit, Kyra…you're so karking tight! I never… I didn't expect it to feel so overwhelming!" His head fell back into the familiar crook of your neck, his entire grip on your body trembling as he held on just barely, overwhelmed just like he had told you. With his Force barely focused on enough anymore to be controlled and contain your arms over your head, you took the liberty of freeing yourself, immediately weaving them around his neck.

Finally you could close the last gaps your bodies had between each other, securing him before he even dared to move again, afraid of not being able to keep his promise and maybe dropping you after all.

Slow at first, experiencing your no longer pure tightness, never touched by someone else but perhaps you. It gave him a feeling of primal pride and he wondered if that's also how your species felt when they first bonded. Another feeling he wasn't supposed to have as a Jedi, but he long stopped caring once he saw you in all your naked glory in front of him, just for him and absolutely nobody else…

Daring to look down to where you two now connected, you failed to contain more of the newest addition of sounds you didn't even know you were capable off, unrestrained moans and mewls, getting louder and more evident at your eyes catching fresh, purplish streaks blood dripping off of his glistening cock, slowly disappearing and reappearing from inside of you. He had officially claimed you, in Dragon People's minds and rules at least...but just like with Jedi...there was nobody left to enforce them, other than you yourself and your body.

How was such a simple act able to make someone feel so…whole? No meditation in the world had the effect he had on you at this moment…

"Cal…" you pant, abandoning the view to finally really be able to let go. The first time in years…no…your whole life.

"Faster…oh makers, please, please go faster!" You beg wantonly, hearing the small pained hiss between moans from you accidentally digging your claws a bit too carefree into his back, forgetting he wasn't a half Dragon. But it's nothing bacta spray couldn't heal.

Before he though did as you asked him, he got another good look in from your current state, picking his head out from in between your shoulder and neck. "Kyra…" He whined and panted, but no more intelligent words managed to cross the gap of his lips when he crushed them hungrily against yours, even more need and passion in this than in every other before. He felt the same bond you did, how it reinforcedthe initial one, he knew he claimed you for himself.

Then he really followed your request and slowly began to speed up his thrusts. Until he lost track how fast he was really starting to get, ending with him stumbling once more against the wall with your weight all in his now fear-tight grip, hips rutting nearly on nothing but pure instinct roughly in and out of your wet hole with a completely different speed and feeling to it, leaving neither of you with much words to say verbally to each other.

You hadn't heard his thoughts this clear before this moment, not an ounce of a barrier as you head flooded with his warm, attractive voice, uttering nothing but compliments and praise. How you were doing so amazing for the both of you.

How amazing you made him feel.

That was everything you wanted but you got so so much more in this very moment, the increased and definitely much more rough pace sending you straight to Heaven with each and every thrust. His grip doesn't falter for even a second – no matter how shaky he was all over – never having had anything he wanted to hold more tightly and dear to himself like you, he came to realize.

All and every sound around you was muted, deemed as unnecessary for your shared and clearly – audibly – passionate pleasure, which left nothing but the unmoderated, surely deafening, moans, whines, cries and growls you gave to only each other right now, two sets of piercing yet glazed over green eyes staring into each other as you felt yet another unfamiliarity in the lower half of your body. And if it wasn't for the obscene noises your body and his together made – wet slapping of hips and thighs coming together and the squelching from your juices being pushed around inside of you whenever he pistons back out and into your tighter than tight eagerness – being absolutely foreign territory to you two, you wouldn't have a reason to blush and hide your head in his chest for your current acts, causing you to smell the manly scent the thin layer of sweat created.

As all you did, was act like normal people that had needs, no? Which Council thought it was their right to forbid this...this...incredible feeling of connectedness, while everything it did was make you feel better than you had ever thought was even possible!?

Everyonce in a while, one of the two of you would still let the other's name slip in the most pathetic way possible, clinging onto the body of the other while tears of joy fell down your face at the overabundance of pleasure thrown at your inexperienced bodies. It was a wonder how you both held on for this long, tears not the only thing rolling down your face as sweat continued beading on your bodies, making both of you sticky – though your scales didn't let you get as bad as Cal.

"I…I think I'm going to cum, Kyr-" You were about to say the same words as he suddenly stilled, his hands that had been holding onto you from the small of your back slid down to your hips at that moment.

His knuckles turned (even more) white at the instinctive grip he used to pull you firmly back down, flush against the base of his pulsing cock, feeling his hot balls twitching below you as he came inside of you without giving each one of you even another second to prepare or think about a different place for him to shoot his load. "Oh maker, Cal…you ohhh…oh my!" An almost strangled cry escapes you at the sudden burning hot feeling rushing inside your walls, the mere act of his own climax and how it ended so suddenly with his teeth back in your shoulders – which still wasn't enough to muffle his own shouts. It threw you over the cliff as well, joining in on the redhead's excited final chants of moans.

Clenching around his still draining cock, you pant and find some air to laugh, throwing your head back, only barely missing the house wall. You two actually just did that!

"You're still…kark…c-clenching me so tightly…" and even though you felt him shake all over his body, having obvious trouble staying on his two feet right now, you knew he still wouldn't ever drop you. He finally rested you two against the wall, staying pushed tightly and deeply into you though, not wanting to lose that one of a kind feeling just yet…he just needed you to give him a few minutes…

Two minutes pass.

Three minutes pass...

Four minutes pa-

"Ha…this…this was something…" He exhales, clearly exhausted and it reminded you of how handsome he looked whenever you two trained together on Bogano for hours and hours. Orange strands of his tousled hair sticking to his glistening forehead, some at the side of his face as well. He looked godlike, mouth hanging slightly open with a smile as he admired you back. And he thought the very same about you, the connection you two formed still intact even when you finished.

Something about that thought made you smile, knowing you now really had someone to share your thoughts with. Literally.

Carefully, he slips out from your now sore hole, swallowing hard at the various fluids that tried to roll and flow out along afterwards. "Should I clea- " "P-push it back in…p-please…" If he hadn't noticed it by the stutter in your voice already, he did once he looked back up to see it. You're again blushing, clouded green eyes settled on his cock and the pale hand that guided himself gently out of you. But mainly, you looked nearly enchanted at the amount of cum starting to leak from in between your legs.

____

"I-if you're okay with that, I mean…" your voice was quiet, meek, the awkwardness of the situation starting to settle in both of you when Cal shook his head with a gentle…a loving…smile, "...I have a question for you, Kyra, I…I was wondering if you ever wondered if it was possible to safe your kind's extinction?"

W-what?! What was he meaning? To let your species get taken off the extinction list, you would need live proof that you're not the last free one of your kin-...i-is he implying…

"We have a mission, Cal…My…my personal affairs, they have no place in all of this…" Trying to distract your own mind from going to the wrong places again, you suddenly become increasingly aware where you are right now.

You're right out in the open, in public. Bounty Hunter Corpses and some just knocked out – but starting to stir – all around your two naked, shaking, sticky and still intertwined bodies, sweat reflecting the two merciless suns high high up in the great Tatooine Sky.

You had your first time out in the open, of all places.

"We can find a place for it…i-if you really want it to have a place…" He slowly went to put you back onto your feet, your underwear – which was drenched in your arousal, you only realize now – being the first thing of the heap he went to pull back onto your body, probably to keep you stuffed with a memory of today. Kneeling on the ground, his touch was completely different from minutes ago.

All he did was touch your skin and scales like you're made of literal glass, like you might break at the wrong or too rough of a touch.

He is right…did you even want a place for such an utopian plan?

Was there even a chance of saving your people? Would it even be of use?

"For once, don't think about whether or not it is of use…what do you want?" He interrupts from below, warm and gentle hands pulling up to the last inches of your shaking legs, making you wonder how you're even still standing. Your legs hurt, they were numb. Sore.

What do you want?

You wanted to find something to look forward to in your future, no more hiding, no more running…but not less adventures, having to sit on some boring ass planet for the rest of your life. You wanted to jump from Planet to planet in the search for new, interesting places…not for a safer place to sleep, constantly having to worry about having shelter, warmth and water.

You wanted an actual future…not just these annoying 'what if's' from Cere…

"Then let me help you…" He begs, rising back to his full height, having already finished with your pants and shoes as well, continuing with his lower half now. And yet, he never let his attention leave you, even if he didn't look at you, his thoughts were nearly all about you.

Then there was that small piece in his head that you couldn't look at, something he kept off limits from even you for whatever reason.

You wanted to ask but not to pry…

"One day I will let you see…" He mumbles while pulling his shirt over his head, his tousled orange locks poofed up from the sudden friction the tight neck had on them. "But…but today…it simply isn't the right mood. I don't want to ruin this moment for both of us, Dragonfly." From the corner of your eyes, you had to realize the knocked out Bounty Hunters started coming back to reality fully now, groaning and rubbing their heads as they sat up.

He shouldn't have just knocked them out…it would've been less trouble now.

"Why do you want to help me with my…my wish, Cal? We're not only busy with a mission, aren't we also just…way, way too young for such a life changing decision yet…?" Cal's eyes also caught wind of the waking Bounty Hunters now, a sudden rush in the way his hands helped you back into the rest of your clothes and himself into his light fabric Poncho. Only then he managed to give you his physical attention once more, placing his still gloveless left hand against the side of your face. Even after all the times he had to look at your face in peace, he still found new features to wonder at.

The arcs some of your scales grew in, some slightly crooked in growth from a tumble in your childhood during training, their composition having still been soft enough to take form from outside impacts. Like falling off a tree and smashing your cheeks a bit too roughly against a Boulder below.

Almost nothing ever left permanent damage with your skin's natural resilience, even the roughest physical interactions you had as a Youngling usually just bouncing off of you. You were called 'Bouncy Ball' by one of your Clones for a good reason...

Sometimes you wished you had worked like that emotionally as well…just letting everything bounce off of you, like you're actually supposed to as Jedi.

But on the inside, you're carrying more scars than your actual body, restless nights being the best example. Something you had less with Cal around, until recently of course...

Cal gently squeezes your hip with his other free hand, pulling you away from your ever growing black hole of thoughts…what if someday even he couldn't pull you back out of it? When the poison in your head won you over?

"Do you really want to know why?" "Of course I do, Cal…this isn't something to be just taken lightly or for granted after all."

Giving the dazed bodies next to you two one last glance, he is back with you with a growing smile. It looked nearly carefree too, if it wasn't for the hint of sadness in his eyes, he could've almost made you think that everything was going to be alright soon…something you doubted more and more each time you went to bed with no results for looking for the Force Sensitive Children whatsoever and Cere acting more odd by the day.

"Because I thi- no. No, that isn't enough for you, you deserve a definitive answer. L-let me try again…"

Pushing his face close to yours, his lips mere inches from yours as your noses touched ever so slightly, he exhales deeply, the silence that came after deafening.

"Because I know that I love you, Kyra…I love you!" He confessed, pressing his lips against yours to seal it as the truth before exclaiming it a second time, his own green eyes squinting as he held back the tears. He never thought he would get to say these three words to anyone in his life, he got so used to never being allowed to have someone to say them towards that he couldn't believe himself with how at ease you were with breaking the rules for him. Him alone.

He loves you…

"Cal…I-" "Even if you can't say it back yet, I can wait…i will wait." But his eyes told the truth, he was thinking about that piece of thought again. Why did his confession feel so...ultimate? What…what did he know that you didn't?

If anything, that dreadful feeling made you shake your head at his thoughtfulness, thoughtfulness that seemed to hurt him more than he wanted to show.

"No, Cal…I…I want to love you too…I just, I just never thought I would even find someone to confide in in the first place. This is far more than I could ever deserve!"

All you ever did as a Padawan besides training to become a fullfledged Jedi was finding quite elaborate ways to break the rules, to bother and annoy the high council because you were very severely aware of the value your unusually high Force Sensitivity held for the Jedi, going as far as keeping your actual true power in the Force known to extremely few People. They were afraid of someone else trying to take your Powers for themselves.

You always knew they all hated you for the massive inconvenience your existence alome brought in, nevertheless, you just had to be born as non-human. Everyone except two Masters and your loyal till-death-do-you-part Clones.

Everyone else saw you as a monster. A freak of nature that should have just died like the rest of them. Simply as a menace...

And a monster didn't deserve to feel love or to be loved, especially not a Monster that was trained to become an entirely detached, almost robotic Jedi!

As you sensed the Bounty Hunters finally stand back up again, you went to show and put emphasis on the 'Monster' part, tear streaked, wide eyes snapping over to them before almost instantly exerting enough Force to push their bodies into the cracked sandstone nearly 20 Feet behind them, embedding their now once again – forever – limb bodies in rubble and dust.

But Cal didn't even bother looking at what you just did, the pain you just caused with not even a muscle showing a sign of struggle while doing so. The amount of Force you just used would need years and years and even more years of Force Meditation to strengthen and perfect their connection to it. It came natural to you.

But the display of your frightening power didn't deter him at all, it seemed so at least when he goes through his messy hair with nothing but a sigh, "I don't care what you think you are, a monster, a menace, not deserving of my love or anybody's for that matter…it won't change my mind."

Of course it wouldn't. Cal had been concerningly stubborn with you since you first met, still remembering the thrilling chase he gave you after you took care of the Stormtroopers for him.

How he had just tackled you without even a second thought passing through that thick – very thick – skull of his, ignoring the imminent and quite obvious threat you were for his life at that moment, the Force making the air crackle around you like lightning was seconds from striking you.

Kark…if you hadn't managed to keep yourself from further losing the control over the Force, he would've been dead that day.

Cut to ribbons, pulled apart at the seams of his body, fried by uncontrolled Pyrokinesis…

The list of most definitely painful deaths he dodged that day was endless in your worst thoughts.

You hated yourself for being so selfish to keep him close to that same just muted danger everyday, especially now that he bonded with you…now you wouldn't just hurt him if you continued to try and deny these feelings.

"I know that you won't hurt me…" He mumbles, his voice sounding more wounded by yours than you would've expected, an even more pained frown on his pale face, "I thought we promised to have faith in each other…and especially ourselves…"

You did, didn't you?

You promised to trust his senses, his direction and in his abilities, in a sense he replaced the inner compass that was coldly taken from you the night Master Tegra was taken from you as well. You both had been feeling lost in the Galaxy for so so long, never really having anybody to really connect to, with some who went through the same traumatic events.

Then you found each other. You saw the chance to heal, together. And you went with it. Now he wanted to make his trust in you official and there you were...still doubting yourself.

You were about to break your promise with the only Person in the Galaxy left that you really came to trust. What a karking idiot you were for that…

"I…no yeah, I am pretty karking stupid, aren't I? Getting everything I ever wanted and still hitting my head against the opposite wall, horns full force ahead…"

Just like he did before, you pull yourself together, sniffling away your fresh tears and slipped your rough hands into his rough hands, closing your eyes at the immediate ease you felt flowing through you by feeling his heartbeat dimly beat in them. He was on edge, positive or negative, you couldn't- didn't want to care about this a second time as you were done preparing your stupid self!

Sometimes, one had to rip a bacta patch off with the hair still under to continue on.

"I, Kyra Yarmot, ...Love you too, Cal Kestis…" His reaction, the giant immediate smile pulling across his face, the relief inside of him radiating off and onto you making you grab your fear and crush it to the ground. This was the last time you doubted yourself and your right to feel these types of feelings. The very last time!

So when he is about to speak up, to air the thoughts of praise you had already heard from his open thoughts, you squeeze his hands tightly, shutting him up instantly.

"...I love you so much, all of it nearly tore me apart on restless nights. Some nights, I hung sick over the toilet for hours, two sides inside of me that kept pulling and pulling at me, keeping me from making my choice!"

And both sides had made you equally sick, going closer to that one would make you physically sick, just as acknowledging the other one did. So for the first time in a month, you finally felt at ease.

You have made your decision, no one left to control your choices...

"Are you happy with your decision?" He asks innocently and curious, one last look reaching across the battlefield you two would leave behind, hand in hand – until you're in Mantis-sight of course – and apparently very heavy decisions having been finally lifted off of your shoulders.

His query on your feelings was thoughtful, just like you knew of him, one of the things you indeed love dearly about him

"Yes…yes I am." You answer, a final, determined tone to it as you squeeze his hand once more, after many back and forths for weeks returning the loving smile he sends your way now almost immediately, the hesitation having left you alone. "You don't know how happy it makes me…knowing you're really feeling the same way, despite the fact that it is forbidden to us…"

By this point, you were sure they would've kicked you out of the Order anyways. No matter if you loved him or not, the acts that came before usually had been enough to exile other strong Jedi Knights and Masters well before you two.

"Who gives a bogling-shit about the rules of dead people anyways…" you return with a carefree chuckle, trying to follow his slow path back to the Mantis, but a realization hits you already at the first wobbly step.

You couldn't walk anymore, you were frozen in your position for minutes now, so you didn't notice as much apart from the new feeling of soreness when you put your clothes back on.

"Kyra?" You slip your hand from his to hide your embarrassed face in your hands as you start to giggle in shame at your own situation, a fresh purplish blush contrasting the black scales once more. Any more times of your oddly colored blood rising to your head today and you would faint right then and there…

"I can't karking walk, Cal…"

And for the first time since your heart-rending confessions to each other, you hear a near howling laugh leave his mouth as he throws his head back, "I should take…I should take responsibility for that… shouldn't I?" He inquired in the middle of his rarely this strong and unrestrained laughter, the sound making your heart flutter and for the first time you also accepted that feeling as Love, acknowledged it fully for all it was worth.

It was worth everything, you would do anything to always remember his loud, unrestrained laughs, especially for their rarity – though you wished to make them less rare in the future...for both of you.

And all these other small things that made Cal your Cal. Now he was truly yours and you were his, officially – but still in secret.

"Well, maybe you should, Kesti- CALLLL!" You whine back but it turned just as quickly into you shouting his name in literal shock, feeling his arms wrap around your thighs and back before lifting you off the ground without a second question or warning. His grip on your small, quivering body wasn't faltering, feeling even tighter to you now than before. Now that he owned your cracked, but fixable, heart – something he now knew more than ever he had to protect with his life – he didn't dare to even potentially think about accidentally dropping you or tripping with you in his arms. Though the latter might at least make both of you laugh some more.

"C-cal, makers…warn me next time please!" He was just a bit stunned in his tracks when you didn't even tell him off for example not having to do that. You actually accepted his help, though still with that blush. Something he absolutely adored on you, a thought he wasn't afraid to share with you. Even if just to see your blush grow even worse for his more than vaguely mischievous mood.

"Hmmm, maybe." He replied curtly, but the tone was clearly held playful as he began to walk again. Every once in a few feet, he readjusted your position, once almost throwing you up a bit too much – unusually high energy letting him do that with your extra "weight" – that's at least what he took from your straight up wide open eyes as he caught you again.

He sure had a pep in his tired steps now.

You didn't hold it against him either, you would've too, if you were able to walk right now, of course.

Then, as you began your ascend to the small hill the Mantis was currently lying dormant behind, the town already further behind you two, you stop him, "Wait. Hold up, Cal. What are we telling them about you carrying me? You're the hurt one!"

He kicks some loose sand and pebbles down the descent as he also thought about it for a moment before grinning a bit darkly, "I mean...we could always give you a rea- " "No thanks! Next idea please…" You brush off his unexpectedly morbid fake-plan as soon as the words tried to leave his chapped lips – though that didn't stop you from quietly chuckling at his hidden darker humor, never having known he was even capable of joking about such themes.

He fake pouts before shaking his head, "Don't worry about it, leave everything to me for today."

And so you did.

You had your doubts though when you first stepped back onto the Mantis, Merrin the first one to rush to you two, her eyes wide with worry. "By the makers, what took you two so long?! We tried to comm you two but…why are you carrying Kyra? Is she hurt? If yes how ba-" "It's a long long story, Merrin. But no, she isn't exactly hurt, her…her legs just gave out. She exerted herself a bit much today…she just never knows when to slow down."

Says the boy who rutted into your quite poorly accustomed virgin cunt like he would straight up die if he didn't do any sooner…

But they couldn't know that, so you – difficult as it was – nod in agreement, "Yeah, we got ambushed…again…and were outnumbered. I had to run more than I am surprisingly used to." The noise you three made must've been enough to draw the other two from their rooms, Cere exhaling in relief. But nothing more at first. She never showed too much of her worry and sometimes you weren't so sure if she really ever truly had been worried.

___

"You're hurt, Kyra?" "No…just needlessly tired. Guess I shouldn't skip leg day just because I can fly."

Cal failed to hold back an obvious snort, which Merrin probably thankfully thought was for the wrong reason. You knew why he laughed though, he watched your solo training sessions every time he had the chance too. You did not skip leg day – that much was sure – and your thighs alone could kill a man if you so wished. He remembers the strength you had in them as he made you hold onto him with nothing but them at the start…of…of…y-yeah.

He quickly discarded the amazing memory, feeling your claws subtly caress the back of his neck with gentle scratches, not enough at all to cause damage. Only enough for a shiver that traveled down his whole body. You both were highly mischievous, that much is clear.

"All that matters is that you two returned safe…but…did you find it?" Surely she would be meaning your lightsaber and although it was definitely in dire need of a clean and a quick electrical fix here and there from the stupid karking sand on Tatooine – you were more than ready to leave this stupid rock of a planet behind you again – it was just like you remembered it.

It still reminded you of its old wielder…would he be ashamed if he saw your recent...acts with Cal? Would he be indifferent…or could he maybe actually have been happy that you were happy? After all, that was something he always wanted for you, especially since he knew how you felt with your nearly eradicated origins, having no memory of your earliest childhood or parents.

"Of course I did. I wouldn't have left this karking rock without it…"

Using the by now more wordless communication between you two, you ask Cal to be so kind as to let you stand on your own, even if just for a moment to show them all what made you this furious for losing it in the first place. When you slowly took the blue hued and heavy weapon from the finally reoccupied clip at your now dirty pants, even Greez's – who showed his relief of nobody getting hurt in his own quiet special way – interest was piqued. Until this day, he had seen only Cal's Lightsaber, with its orange Blade. And maybe Cere's, if she even had one anymore…

BD, still slightly stunned from what his innocent "eyes" were set to witness earlier, climbed onto Cal's Shoulder to get a better view this time as well, the first time having been hurried to be replaced with other matters at hand.

"Maybe don't stand there, Merrin…" you insist towards the Nightsister that unknowingly stood close enough to get pierced by the blade once you pressed the button. Grimacing at apparently the same image you suddenly saw in front of you, she nods apologetic before taking a few big steps back, as well as Greez and Cal.

Within a second, the pure white glow of your lightsaber illuminated the dimmed interior of the ship, the familiar humming of the blade filling your ears like a nostalgic song you hadn't heard in too long. Sorrowful eyes glanced down at the broken second blade on the other end, nothing but fizzles coming out when you pushed the button...it had been like this since the accident that took your old companions and friends away from you.

You remember how Master Tegra showed you different poses and stances with that same double blade, knowing how dangerous it was. It was hotter than most crystals due to its unique properties…it was a synthetic crystal that had been purified by your Master when he was younger and still just a Jedi Knight. From his stories about it, you knew the crystal once belonged to a former friend and fellow Jedi that lost the path.

He always wanted to keep a piece of not only his friend but also as a constant reminder of what could happen to a Jedi that got enticed to join the dark side. It kept him strong, determined...but not less enthusiastic about teaching you both sides' techniques.

"I have never seen an actually white Blade in person…" Merrin confesses amazed, watching you carefully twirl it – yourself imagining the second blade still in working condition – , your skill of handling it evident. Just like Cal, you spent most of your free time training either with the Lightsaber or your unique Physical Capabilities, only rarely the Force to stay undetected for longer, especially not in its full capacity. You were never allowed to, to keep you hidden, even when the Order still was existing.

But Cere wasn't as awestruck at you showing off, grimacing, "Do not do that in the ship, you're going to break something if you fling it around like that!"

Just like always, you swallow your own snippy comment directed at her for surprisingly being a prune again after being excited for you when you first sensed your Lightsaber this morning. You long gave up trying to see a pattern, since there clearly was none.

"And do not give me that look either, kid. We're flying to Zeffo while you're both resting up. You can train all you want as soon as you wake up, okay?" That did sound more like a plan. Agreeing quietly as you extinguish the blade once more to put it back on your clip, feeling exhaustion starting to rush in now that your Adrenaline Levels finally began to sink again.

With the first yawn coming from him, closely followed by a more guttural, growl like one from you, Greez tsked at you two, already making his way back to his seat at the cockpit to start the Mantis for a quick lift off, wanting to reach Zeffo before the next storm was planned on it. "You two already look like you rode a bantha horde across the mountains, don't you two dare fall asleep on the couch again! Go to bed!", were his last words before you heard the ship's door hiss shut and he became too concentrated on the controls for further bickering. Well, at least he seemed to care for your wellbeing by now, something you back then wouldn't have ever expected to happen.

Both Merrin and Cere nod at the blunt Latero's words, Merrin barely having the control to not laugh at you two unknowingly challenging each other to a yawning match, one louder and longer than the other until you both for a moment looked at the couch, squinting. It did look comfo- "Don't even think about it, Kyra. You too, Cal! Off to bed with you two, come on!"

Though grumbling at how quickly they wanted to get "rid" of you two all of the sudden, Cal nods for the both of you. Once again without warning, he effortlessly lifts you back into his arms, grinning without an ounce of shame when he notices the lack of complaint of him not warning you like he was supposed to now. Instead, another growling yawn follows, such an eccentric, bone rattling one that you bare your pristine fangs and sharp canines to the open room. "I can see now why Greez feared you for a good while, they look…terrifying." He exclaimed slowly, turning to the rest of the crew when he realized you probably wouldn't give any sensible answers anymore.

He really did a number on you…the, the Bounty Hunter he means, of course…

"Well, if you would at least answer me, Kyra, you're reacting less by each minute... He laughs awkwardly, subtly trying to keep the noise down for you though when he sees how small your eyes are really getting, clearly unfocused but still on him every once in a while, a tired smile everything you return at his question.

He just wished he had some more time to talk to you before tomorrow, when everything would have to work differently again.

Even if just for then.

"Truly a spectacle to see her be quiet for once, just like you, Cal…" Merrin looks over to your still blinking self, smiling when she notices you still fully witnessed everything around you, looking around – though tired – but you just decided to save yourself the energy you could waste by talking with anyone right now. "Though I know she would love to talk smack back right about now!" A small nod from your place against his warming shoulder and the sandy poncho agreed with her, a playful frown being the limited extent of visible emotions you went with.

"I'll be going with my package…then, we'll debrief the mission after training, so I'll…see you guys later…" It took two more yawns for him to make his actual way back to the engine room you shared, cursing a bit under his breath when he somehow only now remembers the ladder taking you two down to your beds, something so basic in your daily routine, he didn't know how he forgot about it...

You really did mess with that brain of his, didn't you? But who wouldn't fall head over heels for you…he was just incredibly lucky that he was the first to see the true beauty that was you.

"Gimme a word, can you still climb a ladder?" "Uh-huh…" "It's not exactly a word, but I'll still take it." He places you back on your wobbly two feet, making sure nobody's feet were caught between the gaps in the metal platform while BD took you as his choice of descend today, beeps sounding like a laugh when you couldn't follow him to the beds yourself.

'That's what happens when you're overeager!'

Did BD just laugh at you for having your first time in the middle of a desert town? Yeah, probably…but he had a point. Though, you had no privacy anywhere else-

"Stop thinking in a loop and especially stop these 'what we did is bad' thoughts. I don't regret it, do you?" He mutters a small 'See?' when you immediately shake your head in a vigorous no, eyes as wide as they could be with sleep trying to take over.

"Do you want me to...uhm... help undress you? It's going to be uncomfortable to sleep that way…"

A few minutes later, you're both finally bed ready, though he still idled a bit on your side, warming your now shivering body as sleep clawed at not just your thoughts. But something kept you awake.

While everything should be feeling right for once, you got your Lightsaber back, you jumped over your shadow and you confessed your love to the redhead next to you, a stupid little smile on him as he let his right hand glide through your hand, gently untangling them from the battle you had on Tatooine today. It would take weeks for all the stupid sand to get out from your scalp and other body parts, feeling the small particles grind under some particular scales on your body.

But then there was this nagging feeling at the back of your head. Something was….wrong. Not everything was fine and yet you had no idea what it was, you could'nt pinpoint it. What if you had another vision tonight…what if it showed Cal getting hurt because of you?

"Cal…is everything alright?" The question was asked without a previous thought being exchanged by the two of you to give him an immediate reason for your worry, but when he freezes for just a moment, you were certain something was wrong…

"You're just exhausted, Kyra…you know your senses get a bit funky then. Tomorrow is a new day and look at it that way: You can finally fight me in actual Lightsaber Combat! I can't wait to see what you're capable of with it!"

He was rambling on, words flowing almost too quickly for your current state to actually follow him mentally, so you just...nod. You didn't question the unusual pattern of speech he suddenly took to respond to your concern.

You didn't question the sudden speed he ended your warming interaction, or how he left your bed side like it burned him, some to you inaudible excuse leading him back so his bed.

You were too tired now, still slightly basking in the afterglow of your not so Jedi like acts earlier, so you didn't even file these actions for worrisome. Maybe he had been tired as well, he had to be, he exerted himself even more than you. He held onto you, made you feel all these fantastical things for the first time. Such a feat is tiring, especially after fighting 25 Bounty Hunters at your side…

"Hey Kyra?" You hear his bed creak a bit from him letting himself fall onto it with a heavy sigh, a hint of burden hidden in it.

"Yes, Cal?" Would he maybe tell you what is evidently wrong after all…? Did he not trust you as much as you promised each other in the end?

Silence, deafening silence...

"I-I love you…" He claims, voice heavy with something, a sniffle going right past your numbed senses by now as well as you could only smile at the black partition that hid his figure from you. He made you feel like a whole different person…a better version of yourself.

"And I love you too, Goodnight Cal…and I can't wait for Zeffo to train…"

Blissful and happy about today's events, you didn't hear the effect your true-to-the-core words had on him. Meanwhile you drifted off to a hopefully dreamless sleep quicker than you had since the fall of the Order, feeling mostly at ease for once, again.

"And nothing will ever change my feelings for you, my beautiful, breathtaking Dragonfly…I love you more…"

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#cal kestis x reader #star wars fallen order #cal kestis #cal kestis x oc #fallen order cal kestis #smut #cal kestis smut #cal kestis is a monster fucker #can't change my mind

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