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callmeby-mylastname · 2 months

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shattered glass

warnings:angst,Mindy being silly, not entirely proof read(sorry guys)

summary:a beautifully blissful relation quickly ruined by five words.

A/N:oh boy has it been wild, i am sorry for not being able to do any requests but i should be back now. Apologies if you don’t even want this anymore but i’ll be putting out fics little by little however all requests will be done soon, once again sorry guys.

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Three months. Three months of sneaky touches,secret kisses,lousy excuses to get some privacy. And yet no one knows that you and Tara have been in love the whole time.

“I know your secret Y/N.”

Or maybe they do.

The group are currently at Tara and sams apartment having their weekly movie marathon. And here you are under the shadow of Mindy Meeks as she is currently confronting you on a ‘secret’.

“Wha-what? Secret?pfffft. I Have absolutely no secrets, i am a very honest woman.” You awakardly giggled as Mindy was sill glaring into your soul.

“Oh?so we’re playing dumb? Let me sign it out”

“You, plus, woman-“ you already hated where this was going and so did Tara by the worried glances she kept sending you and her fidgeting hands.

Of course you loved Tara but there are countless reasons why no one can know. For starters, sam does not like you and you are terrified of sam.

“Admit it Y/L/N, you used my excellent movies knowledge to flirt with blonde in film”

Wait.what.

To say a confusing amount of emotions were running through you would be an understatement. On one hand you are overjoyed she infect does not know about you and Tara, however… you would debate your film skills are better than Mindy and of course most importantly you did NOT flirt with the girl in your film class.

“I-im-.what?’ You rather smoothly stuttered out.”Clara? You know one of the prettiest girls in school, not to mention BIG crush on you’

You take a quick glance over at Tara who does not look like the happiest girl in the world with this information.brilliant.

“Please the day Y/N gets a girlfriend is the day the word ends” sam ever so handsomely chimes in, shes sat over near the kitchen island sipping a glass of water.

“Oh no, you’d be surprised Y/N may be a nerd but she actually bags” chad continues, if you do say so yourself make the matter so much better.

You feel Tara’s jealousy radiate off her like she was just hit by a nuke and you were the giga counter.

“I left my phone in my room” without another word Tara stands up from the settee and beelines towards her room.

The group share their looks of concerned glances.

sighing you stand up “ill go check on her” and with that you’re walking right after Tara. blissfuly missing the switch from confusion to the most grinch looking grin coming from Mindy as she watches your figure walk after her.

You softly knock three times, Tara swiftly opens the door locking eyes with you.”hey”you sheepishly slime. “’bags’ huh?” She quotes.

“My love you know how chad is, i only have eyes for you i promise.” You cup her cheeks.

“Ill make sure of it” she grins pulling you into her room, making sure to close the door behind you.

It had been hours since you’ve been able to kiss eachother and it shows because neither of you realised Mindy standing at the door absolutely gobsmacked.

“Oh my actual like god,like jesus can strike me down i Knew it.” hearing Mindys voice you and Tara immediately pulled away. “Mindy listen you cant tell anyone please i-“ and abruptly Tara was cut off with Mindy running to tattle to the rest of the group.

“Woah Mindy you good?’ Sam questions noticing the girl.

“Y/N and Tara are dating” she blurts out just in time for you and Tara to run into the room.

Remember that nice,cold refreshing glass of after sam was drinking? Well it’s currently shattered on the floor landing right beside her jaw.

“Tara.room.now” and she’s storming off. Tara give you a gentle squeeze and runs off fete er sister.

“Ill,just ehm. Ill clean the glass” chad awkwardly runs off. Mindy is facing you, a look of concern mixed with regret, “hey,im sorry i didnt think-“ “no. no you didnt Mindy,im going home”

And with that you’re gone.

It had been weeks since then,chad keeps telling you how sorry Mindy is and Tara has ben completely avoiding you.and trust you were feeling the effects of her absence, you had tried your best to talk to her.

Walking up to her in school?walked past. texting?.ignored. calling?blocked,

It was gone,the most beautiful thing you both had tried desperately to protect ripped away because of a silly mistake.

taglist

request by - @ijustlovemaths (i know it’s been months i’m so sorry bro💀)

#tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter #scream #tara x reader #tara carpenter x y/n #mindy meeks martin #jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega x you

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rose-tea-and-strawberries · 6 months

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One Step Closer

Prince Rielle x Female Reader

Masterlist

A dance is like a conversation Except your lips don't ever need to part And once you've begun You speak as one Cheek to cheek Toe to toe Heart to heart - Prince Eric, The Little Mermaid Broadway Musical

Despite being a merman prince having only just gained legs a few months ago, he was much more agile on his feet than you could ever dream to be. With your hand clasped in his, he merrily dragged you around the market from stall to stall, sight to sight, attraction to attraction - being physically unable to remain in one place for more than half a minute before something else caught his eye, almost gliding across the cobbled streets to sate his childlike wonder.

It’s a wondrous feeling, being in the presence of a philocalist who would gaze at the most mundane objects with starry-eyed reverence. You couldn’t but let fondness overcome you as he bounded here and there, fluffy waves of crimson locks bouncing with every spring of his steps. Making friends with someone as animated as The Sea King’s youngest was one of your favourite parts of visiting NRC. He was so enthusiastic, so lively and carried such a zest for life and appreciation for everything that it was impossible to not hold at least a little fondness. He welcomed you to RSA with warm open arms, seconds after meeting you and there was never a moment where you were at a loss for words since he was so ready to gush about anything and everything and listen to you, completely enthralled - even in silence he had the ability to fill the room with vibrant colours - so accepting his and Neige’s invitation to a surprise outing was as easy as those pies the fair, ebony haired boy loved to make.

To be honest, you could understand his fascination. Being a metaphorical fish out of water yourself, your adventures in this world were one surprise after another (some good surprises and others not so much to say the least). And it wasn’t like the landscape was anything to scoff at - the organisers of this festival clearly knew what they were doing.

Bouquets of rainbow-hued flowers were tied up in bunches on street lamps and rows of blossoms were lining the roads. Kaleidoscopic bunting soared above you, their polychromatic bundles fluttering from where they were tied securely onto the sleek black street lamps that lined the streets. Every inch of this fete was something out of a picture book and paired with the beautiful weather, you could spend hours just drinking it all in.

You let your eyes skim through the stalls, looking for any souvenirs you could purchase for your friends back in NRC. You felt guilty enough saying goodbye to the Ramshackle ghosts and Ace and Deuce an hour before you left for your weeklong transfer to RSA but having this much fun without them felt almost foreign (Grim, who had been your companion in said transfer, seemed absolutely hunky dory about leaving NRC, as he was gleefully imbibing any food he came across). Besides, they were most likely well aware of you visiting the festival near their rival school’s campus if they saw the selfie Neige had posted with you and his friend group about an hour ago.

“So,” Rielle’s bubbly voice chirped, from where he had appeared next to you, eyes coruscating, “what do you think?”

“It’s all so amazing,” you marvelled, “I can’t think of any words to say - everything is just so unbelievable.”

“That's alright!” he laughed, clasping both of your hands in his, his starry, wide-eyed grin matching your own, “who needs words? Dancing beats small talk any day. Come on.”

He pulled you to an empty path of land, away from the bustling crowds and laughing children, removed from the festival-goers sight but still close enough to hear the joyful melody of the live band that was playing. Without saying a word he twirled you around, laughing at your surprised yelp.

“I’m-I’m not much of a dancer, Rielle,” you say to him.

He merely grins at your response, “that’s alright, neither am I. We don’t have dancing in my kingdom - not the way people on the surface do. I watched these humans dance once - I think Neige told me it’s called ballet up here - and it was so beautiful that I went crying to my brothers because I wanted two fins. So when my dad let me go to RSA and I got these legs, the first thing I tried to do was learn how to dance and well - let’s just say that dancing and walking are two very different things.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at his pink-faced sheepish smile.

“Anyway,” he gathered himself, “I learned somewhere down the line that dancing is less of a movement and more of a language - only you feel it instead of speaking it. You need to use your emotions to tell you what to do and when you start moving and let the music wash away your inhibitions, you start expressing yourself in ways your words can’t.”

“So Y/N,” he holds out a hand, “would you like to have a conversation with me?”

Tentatively, you placed your palm in his and let him twirl and sway and waltz with you. And when you find yourself being lifted in the air and spun around, the skirt of your dress flaring around you as joyous laughter overcomes you, you wonder if this dance could last a little longer.

#twst rielle #twst #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #fem reader

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eleanor-bradstreet · 1 year

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The Field: Dandelions (Benedict Bridgerton x Reader)

Benedict Bridgerton x fem!Reader Modern AU Rated: G - mild suggestiveness, fluff and romance Word count: 2.7k

Part 2: Lavender Forever Masterpost

Summary: When you visit Aubrey Hall to celebrate an important day in your career, Benedict offers some new experiences.

Author's Note: The first in a four-part series based on songs about fields/nature that I associate with Benedict. This part is based on the song Dandelions by Ruth B

Today was the day. The day you were announced as Creative Director for Bridgerton House Enterprises. The day your life took a turn for the extraordinary. Even though you had known you would reach this tier and even though the man doing the announcing was one of your oldest friends, the enormity of the milestone still toyed with your nerves. The announcement was being rolled into the company’s first corporate outing at the CEO’s family home, Aubrey Hall. An embarrassingly large ancestral estate with sprawling grounds, it was a picturesque retreat for you and your colleagues to be feted while celebrating your successes and paving a roadmap for your future.

You had been there before of course, several times. It had actually been your idea to move the company outing to the spot. You found something reassuring in the calm grandeur of the place. Maybe it was the grounds themselves or maybe it was just your relationship with Anthony. Friends since uni, you had joined him and his innumerable siblings there for a few shooting weekends and holidays over the years. After chatty meals and some raucous nights that involved climbing out of windows, the latter of which you hoped his mother would never learn about, being there filled you with happy memories.

You and the Viscount had stumbled upon one another in your first year, headed home from late night parties arm-in-arm, singing and shouting with that unfiltered, instantaneous friendship that can only be formed by two people who just met and are both obliterated with drink. After an extremely messy mashing of tongues and unsuccessful attempt to bed each other, you both woke with embarrassment, headaches and quick realizations that your personalities were not romantically compatible. You would either have ended up murdering or driving one another off cliffs with your shared obstinance, but it was exactly that challenging streak that bound you tightly as sardonic friends and academic rivals. You cheered one another through school and then cheered one another through life as he took his rightful place within his father’s company, and you carved out a career in marketing and design. When his former Creative Director had left, you were the first person he called. Even though your preexisting relationship was no secret, you had still wanted to prove yourself and learn the culture before being handed departmental reins, so for the past year you had worked in a lower level role, getting to know the team and the company’s needs until you had told Anthony you were ready to step up.

As excited as you were, several factors were amping your anxiety. The concern that you would be seen as little more than a nepotism hire. But you supposed there was nothing you could do about that. The details of the event had fallen under your purview too, and you had been juggling caterers and florists and groundskeepers until your head spun. And then there was the brother. Benedict Bridgerton. As a show of support the Bridgerton clan were in attendance at the outing too. It was their home after all. But that left you in constant danger of bumping into Benedict and experiencing the unavoidable effect he had on you.

The first time you saw him when Anthony invited you to Aubrey Hall years ago, it felt like an engine kicked on somewhere in your chest. A new, secondary energy source powering you through life simply by knowing he existed. It drove you to spend as much time as you could in his presence, roared with electricity whenever he was near and sputtered whenever you saw him with a paramour du jour. It was problematic how often he visited you in dreams and how you would flush with heat whenever Anthony mentioned him offhand at work. Benedict was mischievous, funny, and too charming for his own good, with all of the heart and soul to make up for Anthony’s acerbicism. Over the years of your acquaintance you had become friendly if not exactly friends, but you admittedly had never known anybody like him. You knew he did something artistic for a living but not exactly what. You knew he had his own place in London but not exactly where. You knew you had caught him looking at you at recent gatherings but weren’t sure exactly why. What you did know was that your eyes were incapable of looking at anything other than him when you were in the same room, and he was only making it worse by wearing a canary yellow button down to the outing.

You had moved through the event spaces trying to avoid him, not needing anything to fluster you more. That was why you were somewhat hiding in a distant hall of the house, one of your favorites where the family displayed a portion of their considerable art collection. Pieces were always changed out and you found yourself drawn to a new one, a landscape. It was a field on a spring day, windswept with rolling hills in the distance. The lush grass was dotted with flowers - yellow, white, and blue. You felt as if you were standing inside of it, a cool breeze tickling your skin and rustling through the bordering treeline.

You were lost inside the painting when someone spoke next to you, startling you out of your reverie.

“Ah! Dreams in Kent. Like what you see?”

It was Benedict. Of course it was. Beaming at you with that grin that you thought should be criminalized, but which always made you feel better somehow. Your evasion efforts had failed and your heart was now racing somewhere in the vicinity of your throat.

“Yes,” you smiled, trying to act casual. You turned back to the painting - the only safe place to set your eyes. “It’s beautiful. Your family has quite the collection. I’m sure it took generations of curation.”

His eyes followed yours to the canvas. “Oh, we didn’t find this one. We know the artist.”

“Lucky for you. They’re talented.”

You could hear the smile in his voice. “Mmm. And he does commissions, if you’re interested.” He shuffled to stand closer at your side, both of you keeping your eyes on the gallery wall. You tried to school your breathing, focusing on the weight of the champagne flute in your hand, something solid unlike your legs.

“About how much for something this size, do you think?” You gestured to the painting mostly to humor him and keep the conversation light. You weren’t sure you were in the market for commissioned landscapes.

“For you? No charge.”

It took your reeling brain a moment to process what he said. Then you realized he was facing you and smiling broadly. “You didn’t paint this?” you gasped. The cheeky devil. He lowered his head and blushed. Something inside you ached. As if he weren’t beautiful enough on his own, now you were forced to witness the multiplicative beauty wrought by his talented hands. You most certainly wanted to commission a piece now. “Oh my god, I had no idea,” you marveled. “You’re a real artist.”

“Real?” As soon as his brow knotted you wanted to kick yourself.

You sputtered, hoping he wouldn’t take offense. “Oh, I just mean…I knew you were an artist but I didn’t know what kind of work you did. I was thinking more pop art or abstract…”

“Like sculptures made out of cotton balls?” His grin widened, creasing the most delightful lines around his bright eyes.

You breathed a sigh of relief. You should have known he would be good humored. “Exactly.”

“Is that what Anthony says about me?” He arched a brow.

“No,” you said firmly, and it was the truth. “He’s obviously proud of you. He just left out the classical landscape bit.”

The warmth that radiated out of his smile finally put you at ease. Yes, you had a crush on him but you were a grown woman. You could hold yourself together during some friendly banter. You didn’t know why Benedict alone seemed to reduce you to a babbling schoolgirl. Interactions with him felt more poignant, more significant somehow. Whenever he looked at you, even though it was hard to breathe, paradoxically you felt alive, free. You felt happy. You’d probably be in closer proximity to him once you stepped into Anthony’s C suite, so it was time to relax and get to know him better.

You turned back to the painting. “So was this plein air?”

“Yes,” he nodded. “A field on the edge of the property. It’s a quiet spot which is…hard to find with my family.” He shoved his hands into the back pockets of his jeans then his voice dropped to a register you had never heard before. “Speaking of, you’ve been here before but you haven’t seen this spot. Do you want an extended tour? To survey for a vista you may want to commission?”

His eyes leveled on you, glinting. There went any attempt at keeping your composure. This was blatant flirtation. An invitation to…something. A private tour to a secluded spot? Your heart was doing its best to make itself heard again, thrumming to the point you worried it was visible. The evening’s scheduled events wouldn’t begin for another two hours, and you reasoned that some exercise may help settle your nerves. Was there any way you could decline this offer?

“Alright.”

True to his word, Benedict showed you features of the Bridgerton property that you had never seen before. A far flung rose garden filled with statuary, agricultural outbuildings that had fallen into picturesque stages of disrepair, and the looming stone orangery that you had always observed from a distance but never approached. Unlike the goat barns it was still in use, housing an array of palms and warm weather plants in rows across the chess-tiled floor. Even though you had known the Bridgerton family for years, the trappings of their old money lives still gave you pause sometimes. You had hobnobbed with the higher classes your entire life but your middle class roots still caused you to gawp at and ridicule certain things. You each plucked an orange and ate them as you hiked past the lake in which you had swum before, crossed a fallow field and rounded a copse of trees.

Then you saw it. Benedict had captured the field so perfectly, you knew you had arrived before he even spoke. The idyllic fantasy his painting had conjured in your mind was now fully realized, grass tickling at your ankles and breeze brushing through the nearby treeline. Fields rolled out before you to the horizon, beyond the Bridgerton property line but unbroken by any structures or barriers. Just a sea of peaceful green dotted spectacularly with the bright yellow of countless dandelions. It almost felt as if you had stepped out of time into some pocket dimension that only Benedict knew how to access.

“It’s stunning.” You suddenly realized that he was dressed perfectly to match the surroundings, looking like an overgrown dandelion himself in his yellow shirt. It was adorable and endearing. You smiled. “Have you ever made dandelion wine?”

“What?” He chuckled. “What on earth is that?”

“Ah, of course not. Someone whose family has an orangery wouldn’t have tried such a peasant recipe.” You smirked, unable to resist the jab. The field was invoking memories from your childhood. Hazy summers at your grandparents’ cottage in Cornwall where they taught you to gather and ferment the blooms into a sweet concoction. With their ample supply, you couldn’t help but feel that the Bridgertons were missing out.

“I’m not classist toward anything that can take the edge off.” Benedict slowly moved deeper into the field, dragging his feet through the grass.

“Why is there an edge?”

He huffed a sigh, staring out at the horizon. “The usual. Quarter life crisis. Searching for a direction. Posh boy twat who dreams of being a starving artist.”

His crooked grin didn’t mask the plaintive look in his eyes. Blessed as he was with good looks, wealth and talent, the idea that Benedict may have anything less than a perfect life had never occurred to you.

“From what I’ve seen you’ve more than accomplished the artist bit. And consider it a blessing that you don’t have to starve. It appears to me that you have everything you need.”

“Some things perhaps, but not everything.”

His tone was so uncharacteristically serious, his gaze so weighted, you worried he had found your comment dismissive. Now you had to make him smile again. Scanning the ground you quickly found a flower that had tufted into a perfect white orb. You picked it and held it out to him. “Then wish for what you want.”

He brightened and walked back toward you with a playful air. “Do you think it will come true?”

You shrugged. “Can’t hurt to try.”

He bent and picked another tufted stem. “Only if you wish too.”

Something lodged in your throat. The last thing you had expected on this already monumental day was to be cozying up with your friend and boss’s younger brother for whom you had carried a candle for years. The heady excitement coupled with the beautiful backdrop was making everything feel surreal. The event at the house could have been taking place in another world entirely. All of your focus was here.

Smirking at each other, you stepped close and simultaneously blew on the flower held in the other’s hand. The gauzy seeds rose and swirled around you both, heightening the strange magic of the moment. You fought not to react to his proximity and the warm gust of his breath over your hand. Closing your eyes you made your silent wish - that this flirtation would continue; that Benedict perhaps saw you as you saw him; that you could call him your own, even if just for a short while. When you reopened them he was smiling at you.

“What did you wish for?”

You backed up a step, laughing. “No, that’s not how this works. If I tell you, it definitely won’t come true.”

“How do you know?” he lilted, closing the space between you again. “What if I’m the person who can deliver what you want?”

Oh god, was your wish that obvious? Was it so easy to read how much you wanted him? You supposed it was a common occurrence for a man like him but wanted to chastise yourself nonetheless. You would have if your mind wasn’t already paralyzed by the knowing look on his face.

You somehow managed to find your voice, deflecting meagerly. “You first. What did you wish for?” “Ah, I see how it is,” he chuckled. Then everything about his demeanor grew soft and intent. His blue-grey eyes searched yours and you were transfixed by their depth, as if within them you could see forever. “I wished for something just out of reach. Something I’ve been thinking about for a long time. Or someone I should say.”

“Someone?” You asked, your voice tremulous. Your heart was pounding. There was no mistaking where this was going but you could scarcely believe that it was actually happening. Everything around you started to fall away, scattering like the dandelion tufts. Everything but his eyes, his lips, and the tender words that escaped them.

“I suppose my wish was to know if they thought of me too.” He peered up through his dark lashes, a calculated move that you knew was designed to devastate you.

“How funny,” you croaked, your voice barely above a whisper as you swayed toward him. “I wished the same thing.”

His eyes lit up and the engine within your chest roared. “Well look at that,” he leaned in, looping an arm around your waist. “My wish came true.”

You moved with equal enthusiasm, pressing your lips together in a moment that was soft but fervent, carrying the weight of hidden feelings and the desire to explore further. He tasted of oranges and comfort; he felt so correct. You wound your arms around each other, warmed by the sun that shone bright across the field. You had been kissed many times in your life, but nothing compared to the breathless wonder of this one. This felt like once in a lifetime. A distant corner of your mind remembered that you needed to get back to the house soon but you were finding it difficult to care. Benedict began to hum happily as he kissed you over and over, winding a hand into your hair as he playfully nipped and sucked at your lips. Pulling back, he smiled and twirled the dandelion stem between his fingers. “These things do work.”

Tagging: @angels17324 @bridgertontess @broooookiecrisp @secretagentbucky

#bridgerton #bridgerton fanfiction #bridgerton x reader #bridgerton x y/n #bridgerton x you #bridgerton imagine #benedict bridgerton #benedict bridgerton fanfiction #benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton x y/n #benedict bridgerton x you #benedict bridgerton imagine #female reader #modern au #romance #fluff #dandelions

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bambi-kinos · 3 months

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McLennon male/female AU

So way back in June 2022, I was talking with some friends including @dovetailjoints about this Paul McCartney manip where his face was converted to a woman's:

I promptly lost my mind on account of being a huge d*ke so I started spinning up a McLennon m/f AU about it. I still think about it a lot but I also don't know if I'll ever write it or not. Looking at @erinarigby's beautiful rendering of John and Paula reminded me of it, so I am publishing these notes for the pleasure of the reading audience.

I might still return to it at some point but I am currently waist deep in my longfic and have different projects lined up after that.

John and Paula are at the fete together but Paula is being crowned the Rose Queen or whatever it was that was happening in the background. Her best friend is Dot and her closest guy friend is Ivan and she's too busy basking in the attention of winning a competition to give a single fuck about John Lennon. She already knows her worth so who gives a fuck about that guy? They do NOT have a fateful meeting at the church hall.

(The secret is that she quietly follows him on the bus and has his route memorized. Light stalking of the teenage girl kind and I bet Dot has been helping but they treat it as a big joke.)

Ivan and Len both know Paula from school before they went to gender segregated academies or whatever. Paula actually finishes her education here because her dad wants her to do it and I bet she would have been a daddy's girl through and through. Mike is still her little brother and she vacillates between doting on him and bullying him. (Older sisters can be really mean to their younger brothers, I've noticed.)

Ivan still sings her praises to John but John does not take this in the slightest bit seriously. He and the rest are convinced Paula is Ivan's secret girlfriend (it's actually platonic between them, George is the one who carries a torch for Paula) and that Ivan wants her around so that he doesn't feel lonely at Quarry Men practice.

Things finally come to a head when Paula helps Ivan carry his tea chest bass to a QM band practice. The mythical J. Paula McCartney! (She won't tell anyone what the J stands for because it's embarrassing.) Paula's face definitely catches some unwanted attention so she deliberately plays up being Ivan's girlfriend to escape it. I imagine she's pretty cold about this kind of thing and probably much more ruthless than AMAB Paul because she has to play for keeps to be taken seriously.

Then she notices John playing with banjo chords. She says something. This goes very, very poorly.

John could take direction from an AMAB Paul who showed off his skills but Paula just rocks up and makes fun of him to his face. "She doesn't even play! Ivan, muzzle your bitch and get her out of here." Doesn't help that John is immensely taken with her but he doesn't like this at all.

Years of slapslap (no kiss) ensue, Paula eventually does make her skills known to John in someway but he's able to put her down for being a girl and therefore not a threat. I have no idea how they would both develop musically but I imagine that any attempts at a collaboration between them would go immensely poorly at this stage. John would not be able to put aside the sexism and Paula would needle him mercilessly.

Eventually though they come to a sort of détente which means that their two social spheres get some measure of peace after some 2 odd years of them screaming at each other during house parties. Everyone else can tell they want to fuck each other's brains out but they both frequently declare their public loathing of each other. For some reason John makes it his business to know what the guitar girl from Allerton is doing with her time and who she is spending it with. As she gets older this might even become a more reasonable proposition as Liverpool is still a rough neighborhood and she insists on walking home by herself after dark. Eventually she and Ivan stage a public break up so that John realizes its "over" (lol) between them and stops bothering poor Ivan about it.

George is more territorial about Paula which is cute coming from a pipsqueak that John easily has 30 pounds over. Unfortunately Paula does not see George that way.

At some point Paula becomes a bit of a woman about town and starts seriously dating men. John muscles his way into this, for some god forsaken reason, and makes a nuisance of himself running off Paula's dates. More screaming matches ensue but John seems incredibly agitated about something that Paula doesn't understand.

At some point in the détente John makes it into art college. Paula makes sure to mock him to his face for being an academic failure and reminds him that he'll never graduate because he doesn't have the guts. To this end John does in fact buckle down out of pure spite. I don't know if he would actually finish but I think he'd actually develop as a painter and a sketch artist just to show her up. I don't think John Lennon of all people could bear a beautiful woman mocking him for his inadequacy.

John might go on two dates with Cynthia but I think she would be a little unsettled at how he manages to insert Paula McCartney into every single conversation, but not in a jealous way. Cynthia tracks down Paula at some public gathering and asks her if she's being bothered by John. A trio of Dot, Paula, and Cynthia forms. SLEEPOVERS etc. John settles down because Paula isn't actively dating anyone here, she has her galpals and they are extremely epic friends.

Something happens that triggers Paula and John running off on their own. I'm imagining John stealing a college teacher's keys and they drive out to get some lunch somewhere. It's an unexpectedly good gesture from John Lennon who Paula usually dismisses as a cad.

I think at some point during this conversation John would admit that he knows Paula is a good guitar player -- its just that he can't really own up to it in public. A unique moment of vulnerability from him and she responds in kind. She tells him she thinks he's the best singer she's ever heard. For the first time things are not shitty between them. John probably ruins this by honking her breasts.

Paula graduates secondary and has to decide what the fuck to do now. It is 1960, they're going to go to Hamburg eventually but not yet. John has managed to establish something with Stu and I think Paula sent George John's way because he needed support that he refused to accept from her because she's female. She's been a loner for all her life, it's not a big wrench now.

George has had a front row seat to John's Paula obsession for years now and he's both intrigued and weirded out and wants to date Paula himself.

I'm imagining some scenario where John finally goes…why not try it. What's stopping him. So he finds her at an outdoor market and he actually tries to be smooth. He catches her eye on the other side of the road and nicks a wildflower bouquet. He trips comically and almost goes down but then appears three stalls later. Paula is laughing, yes yes she thinks it's funny. He waits at the end of the strip and gives her the bouquet and they spend some quiet time together. Nothing sexual, John is just ready to try something he's never attempted before: treating a woman like a person.

Paula reciprocates and buys him something to eat probably. He really is very handsome and very intelligent. She likes him better without the quiff and says so. He succeeds in making her laugh. His hair is so red and he's still the beautiful boy she saw on the bus.

They're watching the sun set over the Mersey when she says "I was accepted to [university.] I'm leaving at the end of the week. I'm studying music."

John goes quiet but doesn't really react except to congratulate her. He knows she will do well.

He goes home and it goes poorly.

Cyn and Dot throw a big good bye party for Paula to celebrate her leaving home. Their pearl is escaping into the big wide world. Paula is deeply unhappy. Something is missing. She gets very very drunk. George shows up and tells her that John and Stu have secured a gig in Hamburg. They'll be leaving at the end of the week too. For some reason John was really, really intent on leaving all of a sudden. Paula definitely locks herself in her childhood bathroom and cries her eyes out.

John notably does not put in an appearance at the party even though Stu and his hot friend Pete Shotton definitely do along with George. Everyone knows that John and Paula have a thing so where the hell is he? Even if they don't like each other they've still been a big part of each other's lives -- John has an arrest record because he punched out the guy who spiked Paula's drink a few months ago and she screamed bloody murder in the police station until they let him go. What gives?

John still does not put in an appearance. Someone sees a creeper by the front door but he slides away before anyone can see him.

Around 4am Paula finally drags herself upstairs upset and wasted and not sure why she's unhappy. She hears the rocks clatter against her window and by the time she pokes her head out John is risking death by climbing up the drainpipe. She almost screams but helps him inside instead.

John is a MESSY PERSON and he promptly goes to pieces in her arms. What am I supposed to do without you, he sobs. Aren't you going to miss me? Aren't you going to think about me? Don't I matter to you at all?

They have another small argument but its not very serious and its clearly flirting at this point. They're both pretty bombed so they just end up stripping and holding each other.

Jim finds them the next morning. It goes poorly.

Paula decides she's going to Hamburg with John. He told her they need a fifth person and he gave her the eyes. She knows what he wants and she knows what she wants and she isn't wasting money on some stupid school. She doesn't want to be a music teacher anyway.

Jim informs her she is not going to Germany in the company of four randy boys much less with the town ne'er do well John Lennon. Paula bides her time and packs a bag and her guitar. She escapes out the window the morning that they're set to leave for Hamburg and shows up at the last second. John hugs her tightly and doesn't let go for several hours. She just blew her uni placement to be with him.

Hamburg happens. It goes poorly but also very well. John suddenly gets a lot more sensitive to their accommodations. If it was all blokes he wouldn't care but now that they're out of the cradle of Liverpool he's suddenly sharply aware of how many people are watching them, and watching Paula, and how vulnerable she actually is. Paula adjusts to the German catcalls and otherwise refuses to appear ruffled. Honestly don't know how to render this particular section except that John would get an early education on how a woman and a bandmate can be treated. This isn't Cynthia being pawed at by a German sailor, this is his bandmate Paula having to dance away from blokes trying to climb up the stage to get to her. "Alarmed" doesn't quite cover it.

For Paula its an education. She's never performed live in front of an audience before; this version of Paul never performed with the QM. Gelling with the band out of no where is a hell of a challenge but Hamburg still makes them. She surprises John by engaging in the loogie races and by being intrigued by the sex workers around town. I think that she and John still wouldn't be having sex at this point because John is still absorbing all the new experiences and it's easier to keep her on a shelf where he can admire her tits without actually trying to fuck her. In John's mind he's keeping the upper hand by not ruining Paula by having sex with her. In his mind he's protecting her from something; he doesn't feel worthy of her and if they get physical he's scared of making her "dirty."

Paula still has ways of unsettling him though. Imagining John's face if she shows him the underbust corset she bought without a shirt to go under it. He's only seen her nipples in the dark before so seeing her dressed up like one of the street girls makes him pretty feral and that's on top of the prellies.

Paula only performs dressed this way once which results in some mass chaos at whatever club they're performing at that night, kek.

Honestly Hamburg is still intensely deranged and Lennon and McCartney's fixations one each other becomes even more pronounced once they start writing songs together. I can't imagine how their music would change once they have access to Paula's vocal range. Probably something more Nightwish-esque as I think Paula being a woman would make John more tolerant or intrigued with operatic styles just because he wants to hear her belt it.

George still gets deported for being underage but I think John and Paula end up staying in Hamburg together because Paula doesn't light a condom on fire this time. She's too busy putting it on John. I like to think they spent Christmas in Germany performing and boning.

They finally make it home after New Year's. Paula is half dead and John is barely a person because he's full up on amphetamines and sex. Mimi won't let John into the house because he had the nerve to take off with a scarlet woman to Germany without asking permission which means…

Jim does not officially let John into the house so Paula sneaks him in through her window. The band recuperates through out January and John gets used to sleeping next to his lady. It's a quiet hibernation period that they think back on fondly later.

At this point Paula is somewhat disgraced for running off with John Lennon and once again John gets to see this up close and personal which is discomfiting for him since its his actions that are visiting these consequences back on Paula's head. He didn't quite understand how intense the judgment was before he saw it aimed her way. It forces him to grow up a little.

But he still takes her to Paris. Common expectation is that they're running away to get married. Neither of them want to get married yet but they're also doing the Lennon-McCartney dance with each other where they become screamingly jealous of anyone who looks at their partner.

Things progress to 1963. They meet Brian, shit happens idk. Beatlesmania kicks off. I have this idea that maybe Paula crossdresses as a man. She is beautiful but she still has a strong jaw and her breasts are small enough to bind without much effort. She is also still the tallest member of the Beatles and she easily has a full inch over John in height (which regularly leads to the best erections of John's entire life.) Being an Amazon has its advantages and this one means she can present herself as a man to secure a unified front with the other Beatles.

I am unable to render how Beatlemania would change if Paula was the single girl in the Fab Four but I can imagine how it would change their look -- 3 beautiful matching boys and the sole female. Lots of color play in my mind going on and of course there's the quiet understanding that Lennon and McCartney belong to each other.

Paula "accidentally" gets exposed as a woman when John loosens her undergarments as a prank and her breasts pop out during a performance. (I don't think anyone would see her nipples, it just be immediate cleavage and a button pops off her jacket.) I am unable to render how this would go, I can't imagine anything except a huge uproar that would send the Beatles into the stratosphere. This would become a moment that gets debated for decades, whether it was a prank from John or if John and Paula came up with it together.

Paula has incentive to do something like this: Brian won't let John and Paula get married because it would disrupt the Beatles image.

1965 - the big one, I think. Paula can be a woman in public now which results in the photoshoot that breaks the world. Referred to only as "the Beatles wedding." It's just too good to pass up.

Paula gets to model a few hundred different wedding gowns (most of these are separate from the boys just because there's so many and she looks good in everything) with various accoutrements anc accessories. There is a portion where the boys will be dressed up as grooms and they'll be getting special sessions with her each.

John is a complete and utter bastard leading up to and throughout the days of this shoot and its commonly conjectured in Beatles fandom circles for decades afterwards that he was seething with jealousy and humiliation -- he should have married her years ago so that this kind of spectacle couldn't come to pass, and he knows it, but he can't change it now and he's furious that she's dressing up as a bride when she's not even really his. And on top of it George and Ringo are getting to see her before he does and they won't tell him what she looks like.

"I hate you and I will never forgive you for as long as I live," is what George tells John when he asks how it went, what she wore, what it was like. John is hurt and confused.

"You're a lucky man John Lennon. Don't squander it," is what Ritchie tells John when he asks about it. "Make sure to brush your teeth and whatnot though."

John is nervous as hell even though its just some stupid photo shoot and they've done thousands of those already. Brian won't let him drink to calm down so John now has to face Paula in her wedding gown while completely sober.

There's a modern trend of "photos of grooms seeing their brides in their dresses for the first time" and I think all 3 of the boys would get these with Paula. It might even be enough to power several magazines, idk. Collectors items and whatnot. The McHarrison issue, the McStarr issue, the McLennon issue…

Photogs definitely capture the moments leading up to the reveal and then the seeing, the shock, the surprise, the awe. George started laughing and flung himself at her and danced her around, Ritchie did that presses-his-fist-to-his-face thing men do sometimes when they're overcome, yes, Paula is an absolute joy. She made sure to insist on having all different dresses per day because she didn't want repeats. Her boys deserve something brand new every time.

John though. Oh, John. Very nervous, trying not to be, clearly hating the camera, he doesn't turn when he's supposed to and he only reacts when she touches his shoulder and calls his name. Honestly I can see them leaning into a beauty and the beast angle with these two.

If there was any doubt before there isn't now. It's love. Everything else fades away and it's just John and Paula being themselves, except they were always in love, weren't they.

The world promptly goes completely insane upon the release of the Beatles wedding photographs. They got what they asked for and then some. Honestly John and Paula probably have one iconic photo spread of just the two of them that day and in that timeline, that portrait blots out pretty much anything else of cultural significance from 1965-1968. The world turns on but the wedding portraits from that day is what ends up being the most iconic part of Beatlemania.

after that IDK, I'm not really capable of thinking past that. I just like the idea of the wedding photoshoot and how John and Paula came from those humble beginnings. I think they'd definitely have children together but I don't know if they could manage a stable family unit or if they'd be able to save the band from the break up. But there wouldn't be any faffing around about "the Lennon and McCartney rivalry" or "they always hated each other." The wedding shoot was too real.

Notably, John and Paula did attend the premier of A Hard Day's Night with Paula in a white dress and John in a black tux. Symbolism.

I think by the time the Get Back sessions happen John and Paula have an almost three year old and Paula is heavily pregnant with their second or third child. Instead of the deadline being Ringo's acting job they're trying to get one last project in because the second baby is due in February.

I think with Paula's height (she would still be taller than John after all and this time she's wearing high heels to make the point) and her androgyny they would also get some mileage out of early boundary pushing by dressing her up in the boys clothes, so the Shea uniforms would definitely make an appearance unchanged except Paula's tits are out to here and John spends a lot of the stadium concert unbuttoning her jacket every time she buttons it back up.

Just occurred to me that Help! would be a much more straight Dr. No parody especially with Paula as the built in Bond girl. AHDN would be more similar as a documentary with surreal comedy elements but Help! would definitely be more ridiculous and Johnny gets his girl in the end haha

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These are all my notes from last year. Thought you guys would appreciate. As I was writing this out last year, I remember being caught between two impulses: the "John and Paul would be a pregnant teenagers couple" idea (which I see many other based users have agreed with!) and then the "Beatlemania but if Paul was a woman" idea. In the end I went with the Beatlemania Paula because that's more interesting as a story especially with Paula having to exploit her androgyny for success. That being said I think Paula would absolutely be the Domme to John's sub, there's no way a Beatlemania Paula doesn't have John's balls in a cage and John liked being controlled by a strong woman. He's not allowed to finish until she tells him that he can.

I remember thinking that they would have their first child in 1965, with the idea being that Paula is pregnant during the Beatles Wedding Photoshoot, which would take place sometime in the winter so that the fashion designers could sell their wares with Paula advertising them. IMO Paula would make John wear condoms for years but once Ed Sullivan happens John makes a disturbingly sincere plea to trash them and Paula assents. Two months later she's pregnant after John's been climaxing inside her multiple times a day <3 But honestly, she's rewarding him for being so fucking brave all the time, he's unironically earned it.

I also think that a female Paula is still has full on baby rabies and by late 1964 she's desperate to get pregnant by John so they can finally start their family. There's an element of rebellion too because she'd be furious with Brian for not letting her and John get married and retaliates by having out of wedlock children.

#mclennon #my writing #talktalktalk #thank you for the art #the beatles #fanfiction

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aleksanderscult · 4 months

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My unpopular opinion for today? The Darkling was terrible at manipulating people

And that mostly comes from the author's incompetence on the matter.

Back in 2016-2017 on Tumblr she was asked which SoC character finds difficult to write and she replied "Kaz. Because he's clever and cunning".

So for her, writing manipulative characters is difficult and actually explains the reason why the Darkling's "efforts" seemed comedic in S&B.

I still remember how posts from 2020-2021 expressed bafflement about where did the Darkling actually manipulated Alina in S&B.

His first, full conversation with her? He lied to her three times and tried to figure her out. What her views are, what does she know about him, has her judgement been clouded by other people's opinions of him, how she feels about her supposed destiny. Apparently she failed in each one of them and the Darkling decided to withhold information since he didn't find her trustworthy. It was too early and she was too immature.

I've written about this scene here but I MUST put this reblog here as well because it's ✨gold✨

So for anyone who believes he should tell her the truth from the very beginning uhh....have you ever been to a job with a hierarchy?

(You can also read a very good meta about their first conversation here from @theweeklydiscourse)

His additional conversations with her? They lasted only ten minutes (maximum) and he mostly tried to soothe her fears and assure her that since she'll have the Stag she won't have to worry about the strength of her power. So, me, the reader, am I supposed to think "That walk that he took with her and lasted for five minutes was so suspicious"?. Ahh...ok.

That first kiss? Boy wasn't it awkward.

It was like I watched two high school kids being kissed for the first time💀

I'm sorry but if that was manipulating then he didn't succeed at making the reader say "Now that seems shady" but wonder "What the fuck was that?". The same thing Alina wondered apparently.

If he wanted to manipulate Alina, why didn't he stay longer with her? Why didn't he spend more time with her? The guy was missing for days from the Little Palace doing his duties and even Alina said that she didn't see him much. So where was the manipulation?

To the first, awkward kiss where he lost control for the first time?

To their Winter fete make out where he almost lost his pants?

(Homeboy couldn't even control his own feelings apparently)

Leigh describes him as "manipulative" but we have no context.

So basically it's like "Source? Trust me bro".

We only have a couple of characters accuse him of manipulation but no scenes to base the argument.

His attempts, in comparison to other truly manipulating characters in fiction (like Varys, Tom Riddle, Petyr Baelish, Tyrion Lannister, the Joker), seem honestly pathetic.

When the author doesn't know how to write such things then her "manipulative" characters and their attempts seem cartoonish, cringe and childish. There's no real danger to make the reader feel like there's something wrong. His scenes with her in the Little Palace only included attempts from his part to calm down her worries and their kisses only made the reader say "Oh he fell for her!" (Which is kind of funny because this is exactly what happened).

The only instance where he was manipulative and good at it was at the orphanage scene where he lied about the Grisha children and his plans with them in order to draw Alina out.

Besides that? Nada.

And it's actually strange to me when people call him "so manipulating" and it makes me think "Have you truly not read other manipulative characters from other authors to compare?"

Because, personally, I have and the Darkling seems like an idiot in comparison.

And this is not me trying to water down the Darkling but say how Leigh Bardugo is so incompetent in writing manipulative characters and try to present him as a "master" of it.

Because he was not.

(P.S. the fact that Leigh once said "I don't want my bad guys to carry a label saying "I'm evil" because I think the real bad guys are much more tactful in their attempts" is actually laughable considering how she gave her bad guy a label when she called him "the Darkling", gave him black clothes and a fearful reputation from the very first chapter. That man really didn't stand a chance from the beginning lmao)

#the darkling #if you're an author and don't know how to write manipulative characters then don't create them in the first place #otherwise the result will seem ridiculous and that character will look like a clown #pro darkling #aleksander morozova #pro aleksander morozova #leigh bardugo #alina starkov #shadow and bone #grishaverse #grishaverse trilogy

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kinsfaun · 2 years

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#john lennon #teddy boy #1950s #liverpool #woolton village fete #quarry bank school #the quarrymen #1957 #baby beatles #teenage beatles #john

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zahri-melitor · 9 months

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Hmmm still contemplating the Timpoll:

Chuck Dixon gets a bad rap for the Republicanism, the aging of his writing and the fact a lot of people simply won’t sit down and read all of it, but he established a LOT of baseline Tim and some aspects of his character I love (Tim the Team-Up Robin is due to Dixon)

Peter David writes good kid!Tim with his friends, but I think the magic there is the ensemble more than his writing of Tim himself.

Jon Lewis just doesn’t really get what a Tim story should be sorry. He is however interested in Tim as a civilian in a way no other writer quite is.

Bill Willingham has two main modes: my conservative values are showing; and heartbreaking character work. I think seeing Tim struggle with the concept of who he was outside of Robin, the school shooting issue, and everything with Dana and Cass after War Games is extremely well done. Pity about the other sections of his run.

Geoff Johns is who you go to for the Tim/Kon and Tim & Kon content. It’s a pity he likes drama a BIT too much.

Adam Beechen’s character work between Tim and Dick and Tim and Bruce was delicate, loving and very needed. He gave us the suicide issue, which compared to Dixon era PSAs? No contest. He wrote Father’s Day. If he hadn’t been assigned Cass’s evil arc I think he’d be a lot more respected and he’s one of the few writers on this list that I’d have loved to see what he did with a longer run.

Sean McKeever I don’t have an opinion on as I haven’t read his Teen Titans run yet.

Chris Yost was my vote but what I actually wish we had from Yost was a more characteristic Tim run to compare, because what we got was a fabulous mini but no information on how he’d exploit that reset. Yost understands how to reference other runs and write interconnectedly and understood which fault lines to push to break Tim open. I’d have loved to see what he did with Tim under normal conditions.

Fabian Nicieza got done dirty by Flashpoint. I said it. Nicieza is the best BatFAM writer from 2007-2011 and I swear he consistently gets overlooked by both being surrounded by Grant Morrison bullshit that he had to reference and work around, and by his Tim plotline getting done over by Flashpoint. If pre-boot had had another year I think we would have had Tim stable and through his growing up arc and Nicieza would be feted for being the architect of Adult Tim more than Yost.

On the “yeah where is Alan Grant” - let us never overlook that Grant wrote “To the Father I Never Knew”. Even if Grant had never written a single other word of Tim, he’d be up there in the pantheon SIMPLY for that masterpiece, which developed the dynamic all subsequent work on Tim and Jack’s relationship references.

#z canon read throughs #tim drake #writer comparisons

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fictionadventurer · 2 months

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NaPoWriMo #18: A Pushkin sonnet

Since I started playing with poetry forms, I've wanted to try to write a Pushkin sonnet about Kiro, @scarvenartist's Onegin-esque shapeshifter. The result's a bit more skewed by the form than I'd like, but I think I managed to maintain the meter.

The Swallow

All Lyssia’s speaking ‘bout the Swallow who wings through all the winding ways to where the Ministry can’t follow although they search a thousand days. The taker of a thousand faces, he stands within a million places and takes on all the well-born’s duels for those forsaking honor’s schools. Who knows if we should fete or fear it, for all they say that no one can say where’s the beast and where’s the man or how his forms hold fast the spirit? Be careful, Swallow, not to bring your Self down with your ‘llusive wings.

#napowrimo 2024 #poetry #guess who did this instead of packing?#the meter was actually easier than i expected #the hardest part was making sure not to have any stressed syllables at the beginning of lines #anyway now i have to go find my socks

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ospreyeamon · 8 months

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the falls of the revanchist jedi

The narrative doesn’t directly examine why the Jedi who followed Revan and Malak fell. It is spoken of as a given – they followed Revan into war, so they followed Revan into darkness. That’s not how people work though. That’s not even how people under the influence of the Dark Side of the Force work. Spending twenty years as Palpatine’s thrall didn’t prevent Vader from throwing his Master into the reactor shaft to save his son. Revan can murder every NPC available to be murdered until reaching Rakata Prime only to pull a 180, redeem Bastila, and be feted as a hero of the Republic, Sith-eyes and all.

All but one of the surviving Revanchist Jedi who followed Revan and Malak into the Mandalorian Wars followed them again into the Jedi Civil War. Even the Exile, that lone dissenting actor, can say that they would have fought with their fellows against the Republic had their connection to the Force not been severed; that they were unable, not unwilling. Yet, the Exile can also say that they would not have followed Revan and Malak in attacking the Republic, that they went to war to defend the innocent. Many of the other Jedi who joined the war effort alongside them must have felt the same way, in the beginning.

Many of the soldiers of the Republic like Carth Onasi returned home after the Mandalorian Wars were over, even those like Saul Karath who would bow to Revan again. What then are the factors that led every surviving Revanchist Jedi, save the Exile, to follow Revan from the Mandalorian Wars into the Jedi Civil War?

1) The Mandalorian Wars changed the Jedi who fought in them. The Exile’s dialogue provides the different reasons why they might have left to fight in the war – to protect the innocent, to test their power, to defend the Republic, to win glory – reflecting varying motivations of Knights and Padawans recruited by Revan and Malak. However, despite the differences in the initial reasons for defying the Jedi Council to answer the Republic’s call, they all would have gone through similar uniting experiences during the war. Terrible experiences. Shared hardship often serves to reinforce group identity.

Older Jedi like Kavar and Arren Kae had fought wars before, but the initial expedition led by Revan and Malak was almost entirely composed of young Knights and older Padawans. Military morality, ethics in warfare, tends to be rather twisted from the perspective of modern western civilian morality. Your ability to prosecute the war and the safety of your soldiers takes priority over the lives of enemy, and sometimes even allied, civilians. Ruthless is more than a virtue, it’s a necessity. Collateral damage is an inevitability. For young relatively inexperienced Jedi, raised on ideals of valuing all life and always seeking non-violent resolutions, the transition to military command positions where they were not only required to kill, not only required to led troops to their death, but required to give orders which they knew would directly result in the deaths of civilians would have been distressing.

We know that the Exile once led troops directly into a minefield during the Battle of Dxun, but I think that barely scratched the surface. We aren’t given the full laundry list of the Mandalorians’ war crimes, but at the very least it includes the crime of aggression, murder of civilians, use of child soldiers, and conscription of captured civilians into the Neo-Crusaders and for forced labour. Given this disregard for the lives of civilians, I consider it likely that the Mandalorians also used hostages and headquartered themselves inside buildings like schools and hospitals. I suspect both sides used poison weapons, nuclear weapons, torture, and executed prisoners of war.

2) The Battle of Malachor V was a purge and a crucible of conversion. Kreia, HK-47, and the recording of Bastila Shan all say it; “a series of massacres that masked another war, a war of conversion”, “the intention was to destroy the Jedi, break their will, and make them loyal to Revan … Revan was "cleaning house" at Malachor V”, “to convert the last of the Jedi who fought beside [Revan] – and murder those who would not”. The Jedi in the radius of the Mass Shadow Generator would have included the Jedi Revan did not believe would agree with the plan to invade the Republic.

I think many of the Revanchist Jedi had already been falling by inches before Malachor. The Mandalorian Wars were brutal and one of the major symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is emotional dysregulation. Irritability, anxiety, depression, guilt, anger – the ongoing effects of trauma make a person more susceptible to inadvertently drawing on the Dark-Side of the Force. Using the Dark-Side of the Force was forbidden by the Code enforced by the Jedi Council, but the Revanchists had been pressured to compromise their ethics in other ways to effectively prosecute the war.

For any Jedi who had not already fallen, the detonation of the Mass Shadow Generator was a final blow they could not withstand. They all fell – into the Dark-Side, into death, away from the Force.

This was the conversion that Revan desired. The moral conversation – the acceptance of actions that violated their previous moral code, the previous moral code that would not have permitted making war on the Republic. The conversion in the Force – pushing Jedi to the Dark-Side ensured that they would not be accepted back into the Order by the Jedi Council even if they desired to return.

3) The Jedi Council’s decision to exile the Jedi who returned to face them was a gift to Revan and Malak. The Council’s judgement might have been rooted in their discomfort with what the Exile had become but the reason they publicly gave is that the Exile disobeyed the Council to follow Revan to war. That reason applied equally to every single other Revanchist. By exiling the one Revanchist to return the Jedi Council exiled them all, whether or not they intended to. They may not have, but by deciding to keep secret the true reasons behind their sentence of exile they ensured the other Revanchists could interpret their judgement no other way.

Telling the Revanchist Jedi they would never be welcome to return to the Jedi Order ensured that they would never go back. Onwards was the only path left to them.

4) Revan was extremely charismatic and competent. The Revanchist Jedi had already decided that Revan and Malak judgement was better than the Jedi Council’s when they chose to defy the Council’s orders to follow them to war. Revan, Malak and the Revanchists then won the war for the Republic. In fact, Revan even discovered the shadowy threat the which had been the Council’s justification for sitting out the war through engaging in it, while the Jedi Council remained ignorant.

The Republic government probably bungled the early stages of the Mandalorian Wars by not intervening sooner. The Mandalorians were committing more than enough war crimes for them to justify it, but they allowed Mandalorians to expand their territory, build their forces and industry, and entrench their advantage. When the Republic did enter the war, it wasn’t because the Republic leadership had made a strategic decision, or even a moral one; it was because some corrupt politicians organised bribes to fast-track Taris into the Republic because it was under threat and they wanted to protect their business holdings there. The Jedi Council was also tangled up in the culture of corruption; Lucien Draay was given a seat on the Council even though he’d been accused of planning and assisting the murder of four Padawans because of his powerful family connections.

The Old Republic was more an aristocratic republic than a democratic one. Alderaan, Onderon, the Empress Teta system – they were all monarchies during this period, not democracies. If aristocrats could hold power through right of blood and plutocrats through wealth, then why shouldn’t Revan lead the Galactic Republic by right of merit and conquest?

Revan was secretive, but at least some of the other Revanchist Sith knew about the shadowy threat – the True Sith Empire. If the Republic was going to need to fight another war against an even greater enemy, surely it would need better leadership. Leadership like Revan.

#Meanwhile in a Galaxy Far Far Away #kotor meta #Revanchist Jedi #Revanchist Sith #Revan #the Jedi Civil War #the Mandalorian Wars #the Battle of Malachor V #Darth Malak #The Jedi Exile #knights of the old republic #war crimes cw

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