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#seriously if you remember that guy let me know

aealzx · 1 day

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“So… Leo sent me to give you guys the scoop, huh.” April’s comment came from the doorway where she had taken temporary residence, leaning against the frame with her arms crossed much like Raphael had been shortly before. The comparison caused Don to smile internally, but he thankfully remembered to keep it off his face this time.

Don thought about joining April in making light of the situation, but eventually settled against it. “He said you and Mikey were the only ones able to talk about it.”

April hadn’t been expecting any of their hosts to take them seriously on the matter, so the response caught her off guard for a moment. But she fell into the mood easily, and dropped her arms to slouch over to the table Lil Mikey was on, scooting up next to him. “Well… he’s not wrong,” she agreed, not looking all that excited to be discussing the matter. “Everyone already knows the bulk of what happened, so it’s not like we really have to talk to understand…. Sometimes I wonder if that makes it worse though. We never had to figure out how to put what we felt into words.”

As Raphael pulled up another stool to sit on, Don prodded April to continue, being able to understand her concerns. “...Can you tell me what happened? What Leon’s flashbacks are over. All the injuries.”

The spunk April usually had was hard to muster up. And after a moment of trying she ended up giving in with a huff. “Sure. I guess,” she relented before drawing a breath to give the long story. “About six months ago New York - our New York- got invaded by three aliens from another dimension called the Krang. They used to be from space, but ended up sealed in something called the Prison Dimension by mystic warriors some hundreds or thousands of years ago. And then the Foot clan from our dimension found the key and let them out. As far as the city knows some mysterious heroes just showed up and blew up their mother ship before disappearing. But… well, it’s a different story for those heroes.” The look April gave Lil Mikey was full of fondness, pride, as well as heartache and concern even as Lil Mikey gave her a brief toothy smile in return.

“...Judging by all the fresh scars almost all of you have, I’m guessing no one got out of that uninjured,” Don commented, showing that he was following well and understood it hadn’t been one of those lighthearted children’s stories for them. “...Yeah. Casey, Splints and I took care of Lady Brainface on the ground. But the boys had to deal with their leader in the sky. And this was after they took Raph hostage and mind controlled him. That’s what got his eye all messed up, from ripping the parasite out I hear,” April continued, gesturing at her own right eye when talking about Raph’s eye. “We couldn’t really beat them, y’know? So we had this plan to just send them back to the Prison Dimension by Donnie piloting their spaceship back through the portal, and then everyone escaping before we closed it. Except…” She had to pause, swallowing around the lump that had formed in her throat. “Except the stupid freak of nature wouldn’t stay put, so Leo got the stupid idea to hold him back in the Prison Dimension himself and have Casey close the portal on both of them. If Mikey hadn’t have… If…. Well, let’s just say Mikey is the reason Leo’s still with us.”

So that was it. This group of teenagers had fought against something they shouldn’t have had to, and had barely survived through a clever plan that almost involved self sacrifice. No wonder they were all so affected.

“Well, I just brought him home. It’s thanks to Barry and Dad and Mom that we’re all okay now,” Lil Mikey chimed in, giving his best attempt at a smile while swinging his feet slightly.

Three people. Don noted the name of three people helping them, and also the omittance of Leon being mentioned as part of the team of medics. “...How bad was the damage? What injuries did everyone have?” Don was almost reluctant to ask, especially after Lil Mikey’s smile fell so quickly.

“... A lot,” Lil Mikey admitted, looking to the ground. “Of the four of us I was the best. Just some throat bruising from being choked, and then all these burns that ended up scarring from opening the portal to save Leo. The others… my brothers kept protecting me.” The last line was almost a whisper as Lil Mikey blinked a tear from his eye and quickly raised a hand to brush it from his cheek.

“All of the scars you see on Leo and Raph are from it. Leo was bedridden for a while. Cracked shell, broken ribs, broken knee, cracked eye bones, and a bunch of bruises and smaller fractures all over the place. Raph ended up with that gash on his shoulder and missing a piece of his shell from protecting Leo before he got caught. And then it also ended up dislocated later, and his eye took forever to get the infection out of. And then Donnie…,” April paused, giving a slight huff and shake of her head. “The Krang ship required biological integration or something like that to pilot. So Donnie ended up in a coma for six days, along with wounds wherever the ship was connected to him. Then also both his arms got broken, and some minor internal bleeding. Mikey says those last two were from him protecting him from the Krang leader punching them off the ship.”

By the time April finished explaining Raphael was resting his head in his hands, and Don was staring down at his own hands. There were a lot of events in their own lives that they could use to easily relate to what April and Lil Mikey had told them. They had made it through their own troubles, Raphael could still remember being stuck to a bed when his ribs were broken. And their own brother Mikey had ended up with chronic leg and ankle injuries ever since both his legs had been broken in the same event. Heck, even Leo had ended up in a coma for a time, but it hadn’t been for six days. There were so many similarities, but for some reason it was hard to accept that all of this had happened at once to this group of teenagers.

“... Mikey,” Raphael spoke up finally, not yet looking up.

“Y’yeah?” Lil Mikey asked, startled about being addressed now.

“....Is it alright if I hug you?” Raphael then asked, feeling a little embarrassed now that the words were in the open, but not willing to take them back in the slightest.

It helped that after a moment of stunned silence Lil Mikey sputtered a soft laugh. “Sure you can. Hugs are great,” he accepted, raising his hand.

It was enough for Raphael to finally pull his head away from his hands, standing up to walk over and scoop Lil Mikey off the table and into a bear hug. It earned another surprised laugh from Lil Mikey, but he ended up just giving a content hum. Hugs always made him feel a little better.

“...You didn’t do this because you felt you had to, yeah? It wasn’t because someone made you do it. No super soldier requirement duty kind of bullcrap, right?” Raphael suddenly asked, remembering a few days before when Lil Mikey had mentioned that someone had created him and his brothers to be super soldiers.

“Huh?” Lil Mikey voiced, momentarily confused. “No, of course not. We did it because we wanted to help people, and because we were the best ones for it. Sure we got hurt, but if regular humans tried to deal with them, or the yokai, I think there would have been a lot more deaths. It’s … Yeah, it’s scary, and I’m still scared sometimes. But I’m still glad we could help everyone.”

They did it to help. They were all of some kind of protective type of personalities it seemed. And after a moment’s thought about how they interacted with each other that became even more obvious. The way Leon shielded Lil Mikey when he thought Raphael might hurt them in retaliation for holding a blade to his throat. The way Donnie’s first move had been to order them to help Lil Mikey and then create a shield around them. The way Lil Mikey refused to let them see Donnie’s back until they told him he might be injured, and even after being so critical of the way they handled him. And the way Raph ignored his brokenleg for the sake of hiding Donnie underneath himself when Donnie had been distressed over Casey’s antics.

It took some time for Raphael to respond, just holding Lil Mikey in a protective hold of his own, before he drew a deep breath and slowly released it. “...Let’s get you back to your brothers… Both of you,” he suggested, including April in the group of siblings since it was obvious now that she had an almost life long connection with them beyond just friends.

“I’ll bring the supplies out to the living room to take care of changing the bandages on Lil Raph’s leg. Then we can bring you guys to an actual bedroom to sleep for the night. Hopefully it’ll be more comfortable than being stuck in the infirmary for more time than you’d probably like,” Don spoke up now, adding support to the suggestion. These kids had probably seen enough of infirmaries for a while, and being back in one probably wasn’t helping them feel comfortable enough to fully relax.

April ended up watching Raphael start to leave with Lil Mikey with slightly wide eyes, and slightly turned back to Don, delaying her own departure. “I thought I would have to say a lot more,” she admitted, having expected a way longer conversation than that.

The comment earned a brief smile from Don, understanding her thoughts after they were said. “We can fill in the blanks well enough. It’s actually worse to keep asking questions before the affected person is ready to talk about it. I just wanted enough to have an idea on what I, what we, need to be careful about so we don’t end up causing more harm than good,” he explained, moving to follow her from the room since he’d already gathered all the items he needed to tend to Raph.

“Huh,” April grunted, still semi surprised that that was all they needed, but also still grateful for it. It only took her a few steps before she voiced a new thought that came to her mind. “How much shit have you guys gotten into?”

The question caught Don slightly off guard, but only because of the phrasing, and he ended up huffing a short laugh. “A lot,” he responded with a slanted grin.

____________________

This one was easier to get soon 'cause it was mostly just retelling stuff that already happened X'D

#my art #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #long post #writing #fanfic #cross dimension kidnapping #rise + 2003 crossover

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raina-at · 2 days

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Journey

Warning: You guys, this one HURTS. Seriously. Trigger warning for death, grief, sadness.

Proceed at your own risk. And don't yell at me afterwards if you proceeded anyway and this hurt you. You were warned.

----

There’s a bit of dirt on her dress. If she had to guess, she’d say it’s probably Jo’s fault. But she’s Sherlock Holmes’ daughter, so she doesn’t guess. She deduces.

She wets her finger, picks up a crumb.

Rice cake. Raspberry flavour. Jo’s favourite.

She brushes it off. Then she fixes her hair. Checks her shoes.

Anything to delay. Anything to put off this particular journey for a few more seconds.

She meets her own eyes in the mirror. “Come on, Watson,” she whispers. “You can do this. You have to do this. Remember your promise.”

Look out for him, he’d said to her. Before he couldn’t speak anymore. Look out for each other.

Fuck, she’s crying already.

No. She bites the inside of her cheek and keeps the tears in.

She had forty years of parenting. Now she needs to step up. She needs to be strong.

She nods at herself one last time in the mirror, then goes down the corridor to the bedroom door. She knocks, just once. “Are you ready?”

The silence that greets her is ever so slightly sarcastic.

Stupid question, she chides herself. “Let me rephrase. Are you dressed?”

He opens the door. Of course he’s immaculate. The black suit fits him perfectly, and even though age has somewhat diminished his ramrod straightness, he still looks distinguished and elegant without much effort. His face is a study of outward stoicism, and if Rosie hadn’t known him her entire life, she wouldn’t have noticed how much of a strain it is for him to take even a single step.

This is hell for her. She can’t even imagine what it’s like for him.

But she was raised by two British men of a certain age, and public displays of emotion make her as viscerally uncomfortable as it does them, therefore she knows how important it is to him to keep his composure in public.

They did a lot of crying together when it happened. Though quite honestly, it was a relief when it was finally over. The weeks and months prior were pure hell, for all of them. Dad was always a dignified man whose autonomy was important to him. When he refused further treatment, she supported him, and so did Paps.

It’s the circle of life, she knows this. They help you into this world, you help them out of it. You travel together for a time, and then you have to let them go. And it’s her duty to accompany him on this last leg of his journey.

But she has a more important responsibility.

She holds out her hand, and Paps takes it. They help each other into their coats. Paps’ coat is unchanged, and she wonders what he paid for this one. Every time one of his coats gives out, he has one made. With the same red embroidery around the buttonhole.

“Where’s Jo?” Paps asks, the first words he said all morning.

“Mark’s taking her. They’re meeting us there.”

He nods in acknowledgement.

They walk outside. It’s incongruously sunny. It’s cold, and windy, and she’s glad for her coat.

Should it be sunny, on a day like this?

Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun, she thinks.

But no. The hard part is that life goes on. That nothing stops even for a second, just because your heart is ashes. Dinner, errands, bedtime stories, maths tests, patients, laundry, paperwork, bills.

Ironically it makes it easier, for her. That she has something to do. That she has somewhere to go. That she’s not in the home they shared alone, staring at the walls, remembering.

“Paps,” she says, turning around, leaning against the car. “There’s something…” she takes a breath. “I wanted to ask you something.”

He makes a gesture for her to continue, but his eyes are on the horizon, and she knows he’s far away, locked somewhere in his mind palace to get through the day.

“Admin is putting a lot of pressure on me to take more hours. Department can’t afford another hire, they need shifts covered, et cetera. And we need the money. But it means I’d have twelve-hour shifts again, and Mark’s rarely home before six. Jo comes home from school at four. That’s two hours I don’t know how to cover.”

He looks at her, uncomprehending. You need to be more clear, she reminds herself. He’s not at his best today. “221A is empty. I thought, maybe…” she trails off, making a ‘you fill in the gaps’ kind of gesture. Then she takes a deep breath and fills in the gaps herself. “I thought you might want to come home?”

He doesn’t say anything for a few moments. He’s watching the horizon with a far away expression. Then he looks at her and gives her a slight smile. “I play the violin at three in the morning. And I sometimes don’t talk for days. Would that bother you?”

“I lived with you for twenty-four years, Paps. I think I’ll be fine,” Rosie says dryly, but she’s biting her cheek to keep the tears in again, because she knows what he’s thinking.

Full circle.

He nods at her, just once. “I noticed little Watson’s maths needs some polishing,” he says, with a trace of his old self shining through. “And quite frankly, her chess skills are appalling.”

“I expect you to turn her into a grand master by the time she’s twelve,” Rosie says, and discovers that it’s, after all, possible to smile.

They both stand in the sun for a second, letting the small glimmer of joy warm them.

Then Paps sighs. “It’s time, isn’t it.”

Rosie nods, and this time, she doesn’t check her tears.

“Should I drive?” Paps asks, gently.

She just gives him a look, and he chuckles. “Fair enough.” He nods at the car, then puts a hand on her shoulder. “Into battle, Watson.”

She nods. Wipes her tears. Takes his hand. “Into battle, Holmes.”

-------

Rosie is quoting a line from Funeral Blues by WH Auden.

I'm not going to apologise for making you sad. I warned you. Remember that before you yell at me in the comments.

May is almost over, you guys. How did that happen?!

Tags under the cut as always, please notfiy me if you want to be taggeed or untagged.

@calaisreno @totallysilvergirl @jrow @peanitbear @jolieblack @meetinginsamarra @helloliriels @keirgreeneyes @lisbeth-kk @friday411 @givemesherbet-blog-blog @weeesi @thalialunacy @thegildedbee @dapetty @salmonsown

#johnlock #bbc sherlock #may prompts 2024 #mayprompts2024 #my fic #journey #trigger warning death #trigger warning grief #proceed at your own risk #this will hurt you #you were warned

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puck-bunny-for-all · 2 days

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Close as Strangers - B.B

“Through the tears I can hear that I shouldn't have gone, every day it gets harder to stay away from you”

summary : Brock’s playing in the stanley cup with the team. He looses and you tell him how you really feel. you’re a nurse and you’re overwhelmed and miss him.

A.N : Wrote this on my break, edited. enjoy tho. xoxoxo,M

You stand over your last patient of the day, an elder woman who on any other day you would feel bad for and have way more compassion than you do at this current moment. You live in Minnesota and you’ve known the Boeser family since you and Brock were in diapers, born a week apart and your mom’s both attending the same ‘mommy and me’ group. You are currently interning at Minnesota State Hospital as part of your last year in grad school, and to say it was overwhelming was an understatement. You and Brock typically spoke every night despite the time difference, yet lately you guys spoke maybe 5 minutes per week with the busy life you both had. Brock was still in Vancouver as the Canucks were still in the playoffs, you worked 12 hours 5 days a week.

“Miss Nurse, can you give me my meds and be gone” the patient you had just given meds to not less than 5 minutes prior had dementia and again any other day you would be more calm, but after getting thrown up on, slapped by an older patient also with dementia you had had it. “I just told you I gave them to you!” you raised your voice and huffed out. Your coworker looked at you as if to say he would finish up and you should head home for the night. You walk to the center reception desk and clock out not bothering to say anything to anyone, grabbed your bag and walked out to the elevator. You felt your phone buzz to life as you were prohibited from carrying it during your shifts as it was a distraction, 13 missed calls from Brock… You click his name and call him back though it’s only 5am your time so 2am his.

“Hey bug.” he says through the phone, “Hey sorry B, I was at work what’s up?” you tried your best to hold in your emotions but you had been so ready to let the tears flow once you got to your car it was like a leaky faucet that just got worse. “Well we lost, we are out of the play offs. The guys probably hate me for not playing.” you honestly felt numb for a moment, trying to process how you would comfort your best friend and suppress your own emotions. You thought you would be able to just pour your heart out through the phone to Brock like you used to and he would say all the right things like he always did, 6 weeks or 6 months since he’s been away. Hockey and the idea of the Canucks not making it through to the finals were the least of your worries. None the less you responded “I’m sorry to hear that B, not your fault though, you need to remember to take your health seriously. You’re of less use hurt than you are on the side for a little. The guys understand.” you say shaky as you comfort him in the way you longed for him to do for you.

“I know but this blood clot thing was the last thing I needed and it just sucks that I couldn’t be there in person to cheer them on.” “I hear you but you can’t focus on the what ifs. But uh- is it uhm - is it cool if I call you back in a little. I just- just got off and I’m gonna head home.” you say slightly hiccuping trying not to let the tears fall.

“Bug, are you ok? You sound like you’re about to have a panic attack, and don’t say you’re fine I can tell you’re not.” He responds. You let the tears start flowing and you’re honestly scared that you may not be able to stop. “I don’t know Brock, I want to be a nurse so bad and I have worked so hard but these long hours and missing you and not having you here to comfort me I just don’t know how to do it.” You say in one breath. “I don’t want to give up because all my work will have been for nothing but, how the FUCK do i get through this lack of sleep and pressure”. “You miss me?” he says as if he is oblivious to you’re hints you have been dropping for months now. “Yes of course, you’re the only one who knows how - how - how to help me when- i -i am like this. I think I love you.” you say through your sobs.

“Forget the stanley cup we can mourn my loss later, baby I can tell through the tears that I shouldn’t have gone to Vancouver, and I want you to know it gets harder every day to stay away from you. I want to fly you out to all my games and I want you to wear my jersey and I want to call you mine baby. What do you say, I’ll be back home in a few days, can you wait for me a little longer and we can talk in person?” “I’ll wait forever for you, I can’t wait to have you back home.” “I love you bug.” he says, you smile so big and wipe the rest of the dried tears. “I love you more.”

“6 months since I went away, and to know everything has changed, and tomorrow I’ll be coming back to you.”

Tags : @skylershines @puck-luck @quinnylouhughesx43 @noahkahansorangejuice

gimme feedback thanks. will edit around 8 my time.

#hockey #nhl #nhl imagine #nhl players #vancouver canucks #brock boeser #nhl fluff #nhl blurb #nhl x reader #brock boeser x reader

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kouyou-arc-when · 2 days

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I only trust you to tell me this. Does Dazai have any type he prefers physically??

From my memory, about 3-4 entries (databooks, interviews, magazines..) insist he doesn't have a type. I always say how funny it is that this is that one part that never changes, regardless of whether he's serious or joking. Guidebooks insist he loves beautiful women, but Kunikida always says the guy chases after any half-pretty lady, so perhaps it's questionable how low or high his standards truly are. That one interview said he's confident he can shape **any** woman to suit his tastes - and if that's true, I can't imagine whatever he wants to be too niche or specific if "any" woman can become it. Personally, I think Dazai sees "women" as just another hobby, a pleasant thing to waste his time on like booze or whatever. The dude doesn't approach this topic all that seriously - so, logically, any type of woman can be fun because she's something new to "explore". But for the joke of it, let me try and remember the women Dazai has expressed attraction for/approached (keep in mind that most no-name side characters are drawn to look very similarly). Higuchi (blonde, short, around his age) Sasaki (brunette, tall, around his age/older) Manga and LN waitress (brunette, stocky, much older) Anime waitress (brunette, his age?) Nurse (dark haired, older?) Murder victim Yamagiwa (brunette/dirty blonde, around his age or older since she was a regular and relatively experienced police officer, and I think you can't become one in Japan before 20, so yeah). Random lady that was walking that dog (brunette, same age?) A bunch of random women from wan/the anthology (purely from memory): -one was blonde, younger -one was a blonde waitress, she had no distinct features -two random older, brunette ladies He most frequently flirted with the waitress (anime and manga) and Higuchi (said she was pretty 3-4 different times). None of these women have anything in common, so it's safe to say he might just like anyone pretty enough. It's, of course, debatable who he's flirting with because he's really interested, and who's a target to use, but imo - he just doesn't have high standards for basic physical appeal. The waitress he flirts with, in the manga and LN, is based on the lady from No Longer Human - an older, married lady he tried to kill himself with, but fails. The main character of NLH, Yozo, says that was the only person he ever truly loved IIRC. That's why some people connect Dazai with "older" women, but was that just a coincidence or an actual preference of his? Who knows. I think it just happened that she was older, what's sure is that he's "open-minded"

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd dazai #dazai osamu #dazai

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writtenjewels · 3 days

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Take My Hand

Jason scrambled into the elevator. He did a quick glance to make sure Salim was with him before throwing the switch. The elevator lurched under their feet before the chain slowly started moving. He was a little surprised the thing worked after sixty years, and it was holding their weight, but it was good news for them. He let out a sigh of relief and turned to face Salim.

“Why?”

“Why?” Salim echoed, and Jason's mouth twitched. They did this same thing but in reverse when Salim told him no.

“Yeah. Why'd you listen to me?”

“I don't know,” Salim sighed. The corner of his lip moved up. “I suppose... I figured we've already come this far.” Jason grunted at that, shifting on his feet. Truth was, he was glad Salim went along with this and was still by his side. The guy could have refused or abandon Jason. But he was still here, and he didn't even seem mad about it.

The elevator came to rest. They were in a new cavern with weird glowing green shit on the rocks. That must have been what caused the glow they saw above. Jason stepped out first and took a look around. He couldn't hear any of the vampires, and just from a glance he saw they were right about the explorers coming down here: he saw a table with papers and an old book.

“I've seen some fucked up shit in my life,” he said to Salim, “but nothin' comes close to this.” Jason gave the space a sweep of his rifle. “They don't seem to be followin',” he added. Salim cocked an eyebrow at him.

“Would you like to wait for them or..?”

“No need to be a smart-ass,” Jason retorted with a roll of his eyes. He caught a smile on Salim's face and a teasing glint in the man's eye, but Salim turned his head away—clearly he hadn't meant Jason to see. Jason managed to tamper his own smile down.

Jason was not planning on ever saying so, but Salim was kind of funny. He made Jason laugh with that comment about shit. And it'd been fun to mess with him, too. Maybe I should have let him tell the joke, Jason thought. He focused back on the task at hand. He picked up the book he noticed earlier but it was all notes on artifacts the explorers found. Jason flipped through it and found no notes on the vampires. Discarding it, he turned to a weird object shaped sort of like...

“What is that,” Jason wondered aloud, “a cocoon? It looks like those things came from here.” Salim stepped forward to take a closer look.

“Smells like formaldehyde,” Salim judged.

“Since when did you become a scientist?” Jason teased.

“They don't teach you Americans science at school?” Salim threw back. Jason snorted; this guy was really starting to grow on him. “We should stay clear of it,” Salim added more seriously.

Jason took a discreet breath through his nose so he'd remember the smell. There was a lot of shit around this area. He noticed another book on the ground. When he knelt down, he saw it was embossed with a name. He suggested to Salim that it had intel, but Salim wasn't as optimistic. Salim turned out to be right. Jason threw the empty book back on the ground. He looked around, trying to find something. His gaze landed on some more strewn papers and a pocket watch. He clicked it open; it swung out to show a picture of a woman.

“Mary Hodgson,” he read. “Must be his wife.”

“Their story didn't end so well,” Salim noted gravely. Jason carefully placed the watch back again. “Jason?” Salim called.

“What?”

“I can't end up like this.” There was a fragility in Salim's tone. Jason felt compelled to say something, but no words came out. It surprised him a little that he wanted to encourage Salim and lift the man's spirits. Maybe because Salim had been doing it for Jason this whole time, and he wanted to give some of it back. Maybe he just wanted to be the reason Salim smiled.

Jason pushed the thought away and kept moving forward. It looked like to go forward, they would have to get onto a rock shelf. It was just a little too high for Jason to pull himself up.

“Salim, could you give me a boost?” Salim was willing enough. Jason got up and immediately turned. One of Salim's hands was on the rock, the other reaching up. Without a word Jason reached out to him. He turned his hand over, palm up, for Salim's hand to drop onto. Jason clasped on with his other hand for leverage and pulled Salim up.

“Thank you,” Salim said, squeezing Jason's hand. Jason returned the grip before letting go.

“Check it out.” He nudged Salim and pointed to the open space ahead of him. “It's that green linin' in the clouds everyone's always talkin' about.”

“I thought the saying was silver lining,” Salim corrected. He sounded amused, though, and the smile was back on his face.

“Well, down here all the shit is fuckin' green, so it's a green lining!”

“All right,” Salim agreed, laughing quietly. Jason felt a little swell in his chest. As he prepared to jump down, he thought just for a moment to offer his hand to Salim again.

He wanted to reach for Salim, and he really didn't know what to do with that feeling.

#jason/salim #jalim #jason x salim #jason kolchek x salim othman #salim othman #jason kolchek #house of ashes

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rainbow-musician · 10 months

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there was a guy on here asking for what font joehills used in his thumbnails, saying he was “desperate”, so i used a font identifier and found it and sent it to him in an ask and then i took a three hour nap and when i woke up his blog was gone, my ask unanswered. i wonder what happened in those three hours.

#joe hills #hermitcraft #joehills #true story #seriously if you remember that guy let me know #please i must know #demystify this for me #who was he #what did he want

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lunar-wandering · 11 days

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do y'all think Macaque is falling back into the role that Azure and the others put on him by remaining on the outskirts of the group because he thinks his input/presence is unwanted (and yeah his presence isn't really wanted by MK and the others BUT. something about the fact Macaque is placing himself at the edge of the group, the edge that Azure and the others pushed him to, doesn't really sit well)

#Monkie Kid #lego monkie kid #monkie kid spoilers #lmk spoilers #im gonna be completely honest: i think the only reason Mac HASN'T apologized is cause he thinks they wont listen to it #so he's trying to do things WAY more subtly and it's NOT working out #and when i say ''he thinks they won't listen'' i dont mean he thinks they won't forgive him #honestly the group would be split 50/50 between ''forgives him'' and ''suspicious but willing to let him try''#i FULL OUT mean he thinks they won't listen. that they won't even hear his apology and will just talk over/ignore him #or completely misinterpret what he's saying #THAT'S what he thinks #when he was being the villain he was putting on a show. it's HILARIOUS how obvious his actions are a front when you rewatch s1 and s2 #but like?? being actually him?? he does NOT expect them to listen to him when he's just himself #sort of like a. ''if you want people to listen you have to anger/frighten them into paying attention'' kind of mentality #not a good mentality to have #it DOES explain why he reacts Like That whenever someone does something that indicates they DID pay attention though #like. listen hear me out. i do NOT think Macaque expected MK to remember the Warrior thing.#so when MK brought it up it hit him like a truck #also why he reacts like that when Wukong somewhat seriously answers his ''you know this is just the calm before the storm'' question #+ when Wukong says ''we''#cause he does not consider himself part of the group. hence staying on the outskirts #GOD this guy is such a delicious pack of trauma to dissect. thank you lego for giving me not one #not two #but THREE traumatized monkeys to analyze

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crimeronan · 5 months

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side effect of having my hydroxychloroquine work really well is that i'm forgetting what it felt like to be Really Horrifically Sick. both because of the emotional distance and because of my general memory issues. the memory issues are a LOT worse concerning Times When I Was Horrifically Sick.

so i'm actually pretty grateful to my past self for the amount of time i spent oversharing here. if i scroll back like seven months in my autoimmune tag i can find posts of me essentially going "eh, i'm sleeping for 22 hours a day but i don't really care anymore bc i've accepted i'm gonna die" and "life sux. can't breathe or think or feel my chest but that's constant so i don't wanna go to the ER about it AGAIN" and "docs took 14 vials of blood 4 x-rays several lung images several lung tests and an EKG before i even left the hospital today. even tho they havent gotten my test results back yet" and i'm like god Damn.

I REALLY LIVED LIKE THIS????????

#if you have ever been the favorite favored patient at an american hospital. you know.#presumably triage is similar in other countries too i just know the american experience is very tied up in. cost benefit analysis #you have to be in BAD shape to be taken seriously at american hospitals. even the good ones. (especially the good ones??)#if you're waiting in the ER for four hours bc of triage it sucks. if you wait for 60 seconds because of triage uh.#You Are In Deep Trouble. You Are In Much Deeper Trouble Than An Annoying Waiting Room #WOW i was so fucking sick. i'm just. flabbergasted.#like i know intellectually that these things happened and have vague memories of all the testing processes and stuff #but i don't Feel it anymore. those things happened to a different person. please god let me have hydroxychloroquine forever #do you guys remember me being sick?? i think some of you actually might remember it better than i do which is. WEIRD.#anyway. back to fic editing now #autoimmune tag

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solradguy · 9 months

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Whenever I see someone being transphobic on twt in a bridget thread i reply with three pictures of my mains: ky kiske from ac+r, ky kiske from rev 2, and ky kiske from strive.

it self selects for people who actually play the game. it’s canon that he’ll fight off transphobes with the blade. and if they actually played guilty gear they’d get the underlining messages

While it can be really funny to bully these guys back, please keep in mind that nothing you can say or do to these people will hurt them or waste as much of their time as what they say will stick with you or waste your time. It might be funny to send them a bunch of Ky pictures, but what they're doing is laughing that the only response the people they hate can give them is sending a bunch of pictures of anime boys.

The only thing that works is blocking them. They've turned being an asshole into a recreational sport and getting any sort of response in return is a victory for them.

#asks #Unfortunately I was an asshole on the internet once (not a vicious transphobe just a basic internet asshole)#I know exactly how these people function because I was there once...#When you don't take the person you're arguing with seriously it's very easy to laugh at every single thing they do #Which is what these guys are doing. It doesn't matter how well thought out the counter argument is. They don't care and they won't care #All you can hope for is that they're young and they grow out of it (I did)#I feel bad for them because I think about what led to me being like that decades ago. Are they going through the same thing?#I was like that because I was in a hopeless situation and hated myself and hated everyone else #People arguing back just proved my point that everything sucked and my hate was justified #It's an awful feedback loop. People being kind to me felt disingenuous. Why should they be kind? I hated them. They had no reason to be nic #I had to get to a point where I was willing to help myself crawl out of that pit before I let anyone else even get near me emotionally #I still remember the day when I realized I was being a fucked up little shit to everyone lol #Early June 2011. It was sunny with no clouds and there was a cool breeze. I was listening to In This Moment and I realized #'What the hell am I doing? Do I want to be like this forever? Get your shit together man'#It was a slow process from there but I did get out of it. Slowly. Very slowly.#There's a lot I did that I regret and can't ever apologize for because it was so long ago and the names and faces are gone now #Apologizing at this point would be selfish and only for my benefit anyway. I can only hope that what I did didn't hurt people permanently #Anyway. I've never talked about this on here before because it's the kinda shit that gets put on callout posts out of context #So. I am laying my naked soul bare and raw for the sake of underlining my original point: Internet trolls don't care

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katsy-kitty · 15 days

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You're 100% allowed to reblog things without tags, or even comment some random letter if you want. You do you bestie. There's very few rules here on tumblr, but reblog reblog reblog is one of them. Tumblr dies if no one reblogs, and likes don't do anything (you probably knew that already)

XOXOXOXO

Anon Nymous

I, uh- I do reblog things. I have some mental "rules" for what I like+reblog and what I "only" like. You can look through my blog and see I reblog a lot, both with and without tags. And I don't fully agree that likes don't do anything, although I know what you mean; for me, if I receive a like on my post, it means a lot to me. I understand that for others likes may be meaningless and not add any value to their day.

I'm not sure why this ask was sent, but I suspect it might be coming from someone whose posts I've 'liked' a lot, but haven't reblogged much? I sometimes save posts to draft to reblog later; sometimes I just don't want to reblog for whatever reason.

If the above is the case and you want me to stop 'liking' your posts without reblogging or talk about it further, you can DM me.

Aaaand if anyone else wants to say what they think about this, I'm open to discuss this. My comments, ask box and DMs are open to anyone, not only mutuals. And I'm open to changing my mind about things.

I'm just not sure if I've hurt someone's feelings (/gen /neu) by not reblogging their posts or if this is something that curcilates here as a PSA service? Is it personally directed at me or an FYI sent to multiple users?

I'm not good at these things, sorry.

#sad about this #not sure what to think #if I stop only liking posts without reblogging then these posts will not receive any interaction from me #seriously if this is from someone who feels I like but don't reblog from them enough you can let me know in a DM #sometimes I also don't remember if I've already reblogged something because tumblr doesn't always show it #so I might think I've reblogged it but I haven't???#idk #aaaaaaa honestly anyone guys what do you think?#you can send me your opinion anonymously if you don't want me to know it's you #(but no hate mail please)#do you reblog everything you like?

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magentagalaxies · 10 days

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vent incoming:

got my grades back for my courses last semester and most of it was to be expected, mostly A's, maybe an A-, etc. but i honestly can't get over the fact that my independent study (the buddy cole documentary) was for some reason given a B. like sure getting a B isn't bad per se, I usually get at least one B every semester and i honestly don't really care about what my exact gpa is as long as i can graduate, but come on. this school put me through months of psychological torment over this project and didn't even have the nerve to give me a B+??? i'm still coping with the self-doubt they forced on me and this bullshit is not helping!!

#honestly it's kind of hilarious ngl. especially bc i also got my documentary work counted as an independent study the previous semester #and the previous semester even tho i barely worked on the doc itself #(mostly just planning and putting together the crowdfunding which was still a lot of work but like compare it to the past few months)#they were willing to give me an A (my school doesn't do A+ so this is the highest mark possible)#vs this semester. like i'll admit my final assignment was late and could have been more polished #but i was literally on tour in documentary-mode 24/7 for several weeks. i filmed an entire comedy special! i put together a live interview!#not to mention having to fucking negotiate with my own college censoring the footage they'd promised me of an event i put together #and play nice with a professor who literally outed me on twitter in an attempt to cancel one of my best friends #at this point the ''B'' feels more like a petty grudge than anything else #like ok we can't get away with *actually* fucking over jessamine's grades bc clearly ze did do the work. but let's just give zir a B #like i will admit the audio quality in my final isn't great. and i could have used more polished footage in some sections #but counterpoint: 100+ students were arrested at a protest while i was editing and i was having a mental breakdown #the fact that i finished *anything* is goddamn impressive especially after they essentially conditioned me to hate myself any time i was #working on a project i loved!!!#due to the aforementioned student arrests my college did put out an option where we could change any letter grade this semester to pass/fai #so anything passing wouldn't impact our gpa if we didn't want it to. so i could just change the B to a ''pass''#but really what's the point. ''B'' is still a good grade and my GPA is fine (3.65 on a 4.0 grading scale. 2.0 is required to graduate)#it just sucks that after what i went through last semester i feel like nobody takes it seriously #i was reminiscing earlier about how it's honestly kind of funny how after that professor outed me on twitter #i was at the hotel with scott like an hour later sobbing and having an existential crisis about my relationship to gender #and scott was so supportive but also awkwardly being like #''i know i should offer the crying child a tissue but where the fuck are the tissues in this room what do i do''#and he just handed me a full-on towel instead like oh my god he was trying his best but also so clearly out of his depth #but of course i then had to remember how when i told that story to a different professor to be like ''this is how much scott cares about me #this guy called me fucking UNPROFESSIONAL for crying in front of the subject of my documentary?????????#like yeah maybe so but how DARE you call me unprofessional when a different professor tweeted my full name and gender without my consent #in an attempt to fucking cancel one of my friends for ''misgendering'' me for using pronouns i'm fine with him using!!!#i don't think i'm ever going to be able to forgive my college and i don't know how i'll be able to get through one more semester #that experience genuinely changed things about my psychology that i'm not proud of and i need to work through #so if i have to miss a goddamn kids in the hall event because i have class this november i am going to set something on fire

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hershelwidget · 23 days

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I don’t know anymore have a Caleb prepared to Fight for his bestie

“she asked for no pickles” lookin scene

#his character arc from goofy tall guy to Don’t Talk To Me Or My Friends Ever Again is WILD #hershel’s octonauts au #octonauts gups #in all seriousness this scene is based off of the concept of lars making his way onto the ship #caleb and beast both want him DEAD dead #also to explain emma:#she gained a genuine phobia from the trauma of her experience with lars and has nightmares about him like. 3 times a week #bundle that info with the fact that caleb and emma are quite close and badda bam you have the scene #technically speaking emma did ask for no pickles. she asked to not Be the pickles.#i’m normal about these two specifically i need to study their friendship under a microscope #to ramble about caleb for a second sorry-#he had enough soup before his death for the effects to. well. take effect. and he gained a rather mild form of amnesia but still Amnesia #he doesn’t fully remember darwin but knows in his heart that darwin is important to him so he stays near them when possible #(as a result from the trauma of being murdered) he sometimes has moments where he Shuts Down #but he’ll still try to be close to any of his friends ; though those moments bring him closer to emma because she’s usually the one to #guide him when he does that (she does it too)#he wants lars dead because he’s being angry ‘on behalf’ of darwin and emma his two favourite people in the world #obviously thats not really how it works but that’s what he feels is going on #’if not me then who’ type of situation with this guy yk.#also ALSO one time he absolutely destroyed felix because he found out that he’s been manipulating emma so there’s also that #caleb is VERY protective about emma actually. most of the time it’s unnecessary honestly #it only really becomes useful against the other spirits or against lars #like in the picture !! woah it comes full circle i know right #thats my cue to post the thing . sighs . caleb i love you don’t let lars hurt anyone else

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parapsychoiogy · 2 months

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turns out the manager i was scared shitless hated me doesnt hate me im just an idiot who doesnt understand social interactions

#turns out if you dont know how to talk to people unless they want you to do something you dont understand how people feel about you #in my defence how are you suppose to talk to anyone let alone a manager who you know nothing about and who hasnt talked to you first #okay seriously i mean this so seriously i can do phone calls i can do Anything its not social anxiety i just dont ! get people #guy (me) projecting his conplete unwillingness to label people as 'friends' or even 'nice associates' if they dont do so first onto others #maybe im also a little stressed about thos for other reasons i shant disclose thats for the mirror to have to listen to later #guy (me) who treats himself like such a nonentity that hes shocked when people consider her a human person who they know #turns out i exist and people know i exist and remember my name and shit (wild concept)

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imabiscuitinthousandworlds · 5 months

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i need everyone to know that i bloody love the lotr films and i went from grinning like an idiot to gesturing wildly and trying to remember my sheet music bc I KNOW THAT ONE IVE PLAYED IT to crying bc of current or future tragedy or suddenly remembering that with the passing of this age all the magic we see will fade if it hasn't already. but also i will NEVER forgive them for the sound of boromir's horn, the great horn of gondor, passed through ages and generations to call for aid that shall always be heard by allies when it is within or at the bounds of gondor and its surrounding lands, because i was this close to crying and then this bloody horn STARTS BLARING LIKE A FUCKING CAR HONKING AND INSTEAD OF CRYING ALL OF US WERE LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY LIKE LITERALLY EVERY OTHER HORN SOUNDS SO COOL WHAT THE FUCK YOU FUCKING DESTROYED THAT SCENE I MEAN I STILL CRIED BUT ONLY AFTER I COULDNT HEAR THE BLOODY HORN ANYMORE THAT IS SPECIFICALLY SUPPOSED TO ALSO INVOKE EMOTION AT LEAST WHEN YOU'RE AS WEIRD ABOUT LOTR AS I AM WHAT THE FUCK I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THAT PETER FUCKING JACKSON AND EVERYONE WHO LET THIS HAPPEN

#a biscuit's rambles #i said what i said #I AM RIGHT #but gooosh i just remembered how precious lotr is to me. i need to reread it immediately #actually im gonna read it to my mum bc shed rather listen to stuff and i wanna reread it soooooo #she may not have the time or attention span to read it herself but by the valar she will know tom bombadil and strider and bill the pony an #the songs and tales and middle earth of old and moria and what kazad dûm was before it fell to darkness and the sheer horror of the balrog #and that that wasnt fuckin saruman but caradhras itself (the MOUNTAIN is evil and hates people okay let it be its evil self) and the song o #the ents and the meaning behind everything and the beauty in gimli and legolas' friendship and their true characters and eomer and eowyn an #faramir and just how tragic boromirs death was because HES A WAY BETTER GUY THAN WHAT YOU SEE IN THE FILMS OKAY and frodos burden and. just #everything #i do not have the words to describe how precious lotr is to me #also the films are AMAZING and seriously wonderfully done save for some nerd details im WAY too invested in #but also i. forgot so many names. i need to study that map again #i couldnt name the mountains at rauros from memory i am a disgrace to past me

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vaniliens · 2 months

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I cannot let miscom win but it is so hard trying to come up with ways to communicate something with someone when that someone was supposed to be the one in charge of communicating it to you despite not saying Jack shit without trying to look like an asshole because youre kind of disappointed and you kind of come off as a know it all. Because. We. Didnt communicate. About it at all but somehow I know something she hasn't told me . which. Is what im mad about.