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convolutedblasphemy · 2 months

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Cursed Idea: Hazbin Hotel as an open world RPG with romance options

The only characters you can't romance at all are Charlie, Vaggie, Alastor and Vox (because he's just too fixated on Alastor)

You can start a QPR with Alastor but this is insanely hard and only works if you (1) never upset him or Rosie on that route, (2) your choices fall at least 80% in line with his twisted moral compass that you have no idea what it is, (3) you freed him and (4) you keep offering him dishes you cooked with the cannibal cookbook (obtainable from the 666 news studio) from "ingredients" you looted from enemies you killed. This only works if you chose a melee type weapon. Alternatively you can buy the ingredients from Rosie's Emporium but they're pretty expensive.

Lvl 10 friendship with Alastor rewards you by letting you scritch his ears and gives you a tail you can equip on him if he is in your party.

You can kill every sinner in hell as long as you own an angelic weapon, except for the overlords. The exception to this is Valentino, whom you can kill whenever as long as your level is high enough. He is the only boss fight that is not level- or story-locked.

You can be redeemed and go to heaven if you get 10000 heaven points by doing good deeds and helping people. If your first boss fight is Valentino, you win and choose to kill him, you get 1000 heaven points

Spending 50k at the Hellmart gets you Alastor's cane to equip on your character. If you destroy every TV at the Hellmart, you unlock a special achievement titled "Radio killed the Video Star" but it also deducts 3 friendship levels from your bond with Vox.

You can pick a romantic and sexual orientation for your character and there's an achievement called "unbridled asexual rage" that you get if you consistently murder the first 30 people who hit on you. If your character is male, this includes Angel Dust who hits on you in the tutorial.

Every story-relevant character you kill prematurely gets replaced by an egg boi. This makes the cutscenes very interesting.

Killing both Valentino and Angel Dust is recommended for players who might be triggered by the Valentino and Angel Dust questline, as they will both be replaced by egg bois with limited animation.

Romancing Valentino locks your heaven points bar until you decide to kill him.

You can get kicked out of heaven again if you commit crimes. You can make soul deals in heaven. Every soul you have comes with you to hell. Bringing Alastor's mother to hell deducts 5 friendship levels from your bond with him but unlocks a heartfelt cutscene where they reunite.

You cannot bring Emily, Sera, Adam or Lute to hell with you. Adam respawns in hell if you kill him though. Then you can forge a soul deal with him if you're smart about it.

Killing Lilith before the story forces you to do her boss fight replaces her with a giant egg boi.

Killing Lilith frees Alastor and raises your approval rating with him significantly.

Killing Rosie or his mum permanently makes Alastor hate you

One of the first dialogue options you get with Adam is (Bite him...) where you violently chomp down on his arm and he screams like a little girl

Other characters the game lets you violently bite include: Angel Dust, Sir Pentious, Vox, Valentino, Lucifer and St. Peter.

Weapons are customizable in appearance. Notable skins for weapons include: severed arm, radio on a stick, wet fish (with sound effects!), angelic spear, Cherri's bombs, Adam's axe and many more

Marrying and immediately divorcing Lucifer will lower your approval rating with Charlie

You can customize your room at the hotel. Divorcing Lucifer unlocks a special crying Lucifer-esque rubber duck that you can put on your shelf.

If your approval rating with Husk is high enough, he will keep bringing dead mice to your doorstep that you can either throw away or feed to Alastor

You can pretty much feed any being to Alastor whether raw or cooked, as long as you have it in your inventory.

Obtaining enough souls will give you access to the overlord meeting room in Carmilla's house where you can obtain "rotting severed angel head", which you can use as a special ingredient in the Jambalaya recipe from the cannibal cookbook

You can enter Vox's room during your stealth mission in the V Tower, which lets you steal several Alastor-themed decorations for your own room including the Alastor body pillow, 3 Alastor posters including the beach art of him, an Alastor figurine and a cursed cat Alastor plushie.

Every character at the hotel has one of those figurines. Collecting them gives you rewards and if you put all of them on your shelf you get a "Found Family" achievement.

You can burn Valentino's studio down during the V Tower stealth mission. Angel Dust's figurine is in his room so be sure to grab that before you burn the studio.

Other locations for the figurines include: Charlie's room (Charlie), Hotel Room in Heaven (Vaggie), Casino (Husk), Utility Closet at the "Consent" club (Niffty), nest of giant hell chicken (Pentious) and Duck Pond (Lucifer)

There's a Voxtagram function in your phone where you periodically receive new posts from the characters with comment options that they reply to. You can repeatedly be mean to Vox online. This is a running gag and Vox eventually complains on TV about getting cyberbullied.

You can turn on the little radio in the hotel lobby or get a customizable radio as a gift from Alastor that you can put in your room. You can select between playing Alastor's radio show, Alastor's radio show from when he was alive, the Hazbin Hotel soundtrack, screams and Mimzy's singing.

Achieving lvl 10 friendship with Alastor also unlocks camera mode for him. Now he no longer glitches out on photos as long as you equip an old-fashioned camera.

Romancing St. Peter lets you persuade him to smuggle you into heaven whenever you want to go.

There's a billboard near the V Tower that displays a slideshow of Vivziepop tweets where she engages in her own fandom discourse

If you keep walking ahead in the swamp in Alastor's room you eventually fall out of the map and respawn at the nearest unlocked waypoint.

You can adopt a little fawn from Alastor's swamp and a rabid raccoon you can find in a trashcan behind the hotel. If you do not take the raccoon to the vet first, there is a rabies breakout at the hotel.

You can interact with the alcohol bottles at the hotel bar and pour them down the sink. This lowers Husk's approval rating with you.

Might make a part 2 of this

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deadghosy · 1 month

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HOW HAZBIN HOTEL REACT TO ST. PATRICK’S DAY BY SINNER TEEN! READER

Prompt: sinner! Reader teaches the gang how St.Patrick day is like when they were alive.

MUHAHHA YOU ARE PINCHING BITCHES LEFT AND RIGHT😘☝🏾

I can see you just wearing hella green and pinching the others. Now only if you survive Alastor. Cause it’s cannon that he hates touch. But if you are like his child, he may spare you and want to know the tradition you did.

If you aren’t like a child to Alastor, you better pray to Lucifer that you aren’t getting eaten tonight cause you dipped the hell out of his room seeing his eyes turn to radio dials.

You dress the egg boiz up fancy in green suits and a nice leprechaun hats.❤️ it’s so cute as they just smile at you and hug your legs

Charlie had to talk to you about the pinching today, you softly pinched her as she talked. But you told her how in the modern world that there’s a day where people pinch each other if they don’t wear green on St.Patrick’s day. But once you told Charlie that a green four leaf clover meant good luck.

You better believe she went to Charlie Morningstar, to “GOOD LUCK CHARLIE”😭😭😭

She’s literally going to try and find one so her good luck can help the hotel. She dragged vaggie into this which made vaggie glare at you. You just smirk holding a green flower.

Charlie would go crazy with this small holiday thing as she makes you decorate the hotel in green for it. Hell, and you don’t hate as you help her out with doing the decorations and green painting.

After that, they all started to wear green during that March. Plus, your pinches are like death themselves because you actually accidentally paralyzed husky in his neck

Husk didn’t like the whole holiday until you told him about the drinking. The mf smiles and switched so fast it made you side eye him.

You’re giving the meanest, tightest, skin ripping pinch to Valentino in his damn sleep.

Heaven isn’t safe either 😈

LMAO IMAGINE ADAM WATCHING TV AND HE FEELS A PINCH ONLY TO TURN AROUND TO SEE A FUCKIN LEPRECHAUN- aka which is you

“WHAT THE SHIT?!”

“SURPISE MOTHAFUCKA!” And you just dip like that throwing down a green smoke bomb.

After that hell and heaven both had a meeting to make st.Patrick day a thing, cause how the tf did you get to heaven..no one knows. You are secretly a god/j

You also teach the residents it, like you teach the old school and probably the new school sinners what St.Patrick’s day is like for you.

Who knew a minor like you in hell was such a damn menace, cause straight after St.Patricks Day. People were scared to get pinch whilst you just walk around the hotel and pride ring.

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chaoticace2005 · 29 days

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#were the photos I chose for vox Angel and husk intentional? yes yes they were #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel memes #angel dust #angel dust hazbin hotel #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel husk #hazbin hotel alignment chart #hazbin hotel alignment charts #charlie morningstar #sir pentious #lucifer morningstar #vox hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #husker hazbin hotel #st peter hazbin hotel #velvette hazbin hotel #Mimzy hazbin hotel

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kailysander · 7 months

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Another Martyr

#golden hour comic #artists on tumblr #horror #mythology #webtoon #webcomic #tapas comic #demon #angel #priest #Lucifer #Satan #st sebastian #saint sebastian

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illustratus · 1 month

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The Archangel Michael overthrowing Lucifer by Francesco Maffei

#archangel #michael #lucifer #art #francesco maffei #archangel michael #angel #angels #satan #devil #saint michael #st michael #religion #christian #christianity #religious #archangels

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st-alastors-confessional · 8 days

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Alright miscreants,

I’m closing asks for now while I catch up on the multitude of confessions I’ve received.

Y’all are so sinful, it’s almost impressive.

I didn’t think this silly side blog would get so popular it’s kinda hot. So thank you for all the wonderful interactions I’ve had thus far!

In the meantime, here’s a scrap of meat for y’all the gnaw on…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Warnings: NSFW RadioApple

Minors DO NOT INTERACT

Saint Alastor and the King of Hell against the wall of his Confessional. Angry sexual tension, Alastors Shadow, tentacles, choking, restraining, power dynamics, sacrilegious as fuck without actually fucking lmao

Enjoy your food ❤️

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

St Alastors grip tightens around Lucifers waist as he pins him against the outside of his Confessional. A new found anger boils beneath his skin, expertly masked by his perpetual smile and steady hands. The cross that hangs around his neck presses harshly into the King’s chest as he leans in closer.

Lucifer hisses through gritted teeth, his nails clawing lines up the dark wood behind him.

“You wouldn’t dare.” the King speaks evenly, challenging his own restraint by not simply charging St. Alastor into the opposite wall and succumbing to his own desires. Instead he remains still, gaze unwavering, feet planted firmly, biting back the unholy hunger he suffered for this man of the cloth.

It’d been weeks since the Saint had returned Lucifers letters or so much as offered a glance in his direction- even his ridiculous grin seemed strained when entering rooms now. Lucifer had started to believe he’d previously been too forward and offended the Saint, or worse: He’d been forgotten about entirely.

In any case, the reasoning behind the Saints cool shoulder was unknown to Lucifer and it hurt him more than he cared to admit. So one night, after a glass of whiskey and an impulsive thought, he marched up the cathedral stairs and confronted St. Alastor directly.

Fury pooled in his gut again.

He is the King of Hell and he will not be treated as a passing thought.

His hands shook and curled into fists, readying himself to slam them into St. Alastors chest, but he stills. The temperature in the room drops, a sudden iciness creeps up his spine. Each shuttered breath is released as white plumes between them.

The heat of St. Alastors body against his is interrupted by a coolness that first coils itself beneath Lucifers shirt, up his torso, and around his wrists without tangible force behind it. Before he can act, his hands are thrown up and pinned tightly above his head.

A shadowed figure stretches out from the darkness and cascades up the wall Lucifer is pressed into. It looms ominously, silently behind him, sharpened by the candlelight of the surrounding room, and arches down beside the Kings head with a snarl. Its talon-like nails run up Lucifers elevated arms, clasp around his wrists, and pull ever so slowly upwards. Lucifers feet gradually lose contact with the floor as he’s dragged up the wall by the unseen force, until he’s eye level with the holy man.

Lucifer shivers as he realises his predicament: He’s trapped between St. Alastor and his shadow.

The Saints eyes are lidded, mouth parted. "Oh, Your Highness,” his demonic voice chuckles softly in Lucifers ear, “Sinners like yourself are not worthy of the holy ground on which this cathedral stands. Do you seek exhalation?" The tendril beneath the Kings shirt, long and thick, travels above his collar and wraps itself around his throat, eliciting a moan as it constricts. A thin line of red slick trails from St. Alastors smile, down his chin, and drips onto the white of his collar, "Show me how you plead, Your Majesty."

The wall groans as St. Alastor leans in firmer still, his mouth inches away from Lucifers. He runs a calculated hand over the shadow-like tentacle encircling The Kings neck, twirls the tail end around his arm and playfully tugs. A soft threat: You are at my mercy.

"P-please. Your... Your Holiness." Lucifers broken words are squeezed out of him. The shadow that grips his wrists squeezes tighter, seemingly displeased by the answer.

“Oh, you'll have to do better than that, Sire." he responds lowly, “You’d be wise not to waste my time.”

"I-" Lucifer strains against the pressure on his throat, "I’ve come to confess."

“Mmm.” St. Alastors long tongue snakes out from between his razor-sharp teeth and licks a slow, wet line across Lucifers exposed collarbone, “Good boy.” he murmurs, “And what do you wish to tell me?”

“I fucking hate you.”

#MINORS DNI #The Confessional #St Alastors Confessional #RadioApple #NSFT #St Alastor #King of Hell #Hazbin Hotel #Short Drabble #Alastor #Lucifer #hazbin Alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #hazbin hotel lucifer #Admin is sleepy #I hope you enjoy x

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nerdasaurus1200 · 2 months

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Ohhhh this just hit me

Lucifer isn’t the only one that doesn’t have a nose. It seems like this is a pattern with all the pure-blooded angels in heaven. Or at the very least high ranking angels.

And that might be at least part of why Adam and Lute and the other exterminators wear the kind of masks that they do. A mask with just eyes and a mouth and no real nose. To hide their humanity, to give off the impression at they are “real” angels and more powerful than they actually are.

#hazbin hotel #nerd talks #sera #emily #st peter #lucifer morningstar #adam #lute

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voxisdaddy · 19 days

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You know how in Black Butler, when Sebastian fucked that nun the entire place shook and it sounded like a giant was stomping around on earth?

That’s what I imagine sex with Alastor is like. Every single time and you can’t change my mind. Like I hear and see it. Whole house shakes.

Like imagine he’s rutting into you up in his radio tower and the hotel residence are like, “wtf is that?” “Is that an earth quake?” “Quick! Everyone grab something stable!”

Meanwhile it’s just Alastor and his s/o, having some loving time :p

Bonus

Vox watching as his massive monitor set up all fall apart, some of it falling into the void pit that he’s only now regretting having installed into his office. Valentino screeching about all the cameras and expensive wine glasses shattering on the floor. Velvette stumbling around with smeared mascara from the ‘earth quake’ interrupting her makeup routine.

“What the fuck is happening—!?” Velvette roars at Vox.

With one monitor left, Vox switched through the camera feeds and falls upon one he keeps constantly watching that damned hotel. Two silhouettes can be seen from Alastor’s radio tower, the earth quake matching up with every thrust Alastor’s silhouette pushes into yours.

“FUCKING ALASTOR—“

Bonus Bonus

Some high ranking angels in heaven watching the shit show go down in hell:

“is hell really falling?”

“What the heck’s this earth quake?”

“Does anyone see what’s causing this?”

“DAAAAAMMMN RADIO FREAKS A FREAK—“

“Adam please be quiet—“

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drawlody · 10 days

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My list of Adam ships♡ n my opinion bout them (also fics rec :D)

Adam x Luicfer (Adamsapple/Duitarduck) 10/10

Need i say more:)))??!?! started out as a "haha funny slip-up ship" to "hey they got really good angst potential". The friends/lovers to enemies to lovers is STRONG with this one n i am eating up everything i could found on ao3. Smth bout this macho-ass man finally getting to stay back n not take charge for once feel nice, also princess Adam supermacy wooooo. Whoever came up with the ship name i applaud u cause that's like a 3 layers name(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

It's not an Adamsapple fic without Adam having at least 1 mental breakdown n Lucifer have his guilt eating him alive:)))

Very fucked up torture but i swear it worth the pain:D The dove is so dead it start to rot so plz read the tags properly (plz check out the AngeliaDark other works too they got good shit)

This one have a splits so check out both the fics (beware the author have a skrewed sense of what is considered wholesome:))))

I didnt think a smut scene could be this sad

Adam x Lute (Guitarspear/Guardrock) 10/10

Litteraly my first Hazbin ship, assholes in love is an underrated dynamic we desperately need more off:))) That with a dash of evil dude x loyal subordinate (which i havent seen since the Deathglare days) n opposite attract (look they have one main thing in common is that their extreme bloodthirst, other than that she's stricter than ur mom n he's lazier than the Sloth ring itself but that the beauty of it no? He convince her to chill tf out n not to burst a blood vessel, she keep him on track n make sure Sera dont come on their asses)

They're just being silly enabling each other terrible behaviour n i love that for them (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) Litteral besties i tell ya

Heavy non-con shit involving Val but Lute will revenge our boi i promised u that

Cool idea n they r just made for each other damn

First hazbin fic i read which is a really cool smut:D

Adam x Micheal (we need a ship name people ) (update: it's Songbird/Guitarhero) 10/10

I like how we dont even got a proper comfirmation of Micheal design/personality yet the ship is here already ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ( im using the Nakariiale's design as a base here love their design)

Hit me with that rebound love x "u look like my ex so im using u as a replacement but ill fall for the real u eventually" x co-workers in heaven. I'm thinking smth along the line of "after Lucifer fucked off with Lilith, Micheal became Adam guardian angel n they just hang out" ya feel me here? (✿◕‿◕✿)

Shout out to Bloog_b for dragging me into this ship:DDD also im on the Adam x the archangels ship as a "gotcha" to Lucifer of sort. Like bitch u stole my wives imma steal your brotherS

Look it's Adamsapple endgame but trust me u will be feed well on this ( u know how good u gotta be for people to ditch the main ship?)

I'm giving yall 4 fics here cause i can only found 4 rn(._. )

this one is uhh non-con so beware

Micheal is indeed Adam guardian angel in this one:D

Adam x Eve (Flowertunes) 8/10

I dont care what yall said they love each other throughout Eden n Earth , might have a falling out in heaven but that doesnt change the fact that they were once IN LOVE. Honestly why cant we just have a couple that have the same bright-eyed innocence like one another.I refuse to believe Eve like willingly cheat on Adam with malicious intent n all, simply she was indeed ''tricked'' or just not fully understand the sistuation, n Adam love her way too much to think that she would do that to him like Lilith. Hell the dude was heartbroken after L left , starting the abandonment issues, so he would have cling to Eve, doing everything so that he aint alone again, even if that mean leaving Eden

Honestly it pisses me off that the Adam/Eve tag on ao3 most of the time is just 1 dialouge between them back when Eve bit the apple n thats it no elaboration on the couple whatsoever >:(((

Lots of switcharoos

sinner eve woooo

look its hard trynna find a fic focusing on them ok?

Adam x St. Peter (Guitargreeter (bet ya didnt see that coming:))) 7/10

Base on this fanfic alone Joe my dude u r on the path of becoming THE Adam crack-ship writer n i am here for this:)))) just so u wait this dude gonna whip out a AdamxNifty , AdamxHusk fic later on ( •̀ ω •́ )✧

From within the fic itself the ship its 2 bros in love with homophobia standing in the way >:( also when did we have a name?!?!?!?

I just like Adam x anyone in heaven alright:D like bro famous n he got that ancient rizz, u telling mr he cant bag a hottie or 2-100+ hmm?

Adam x Alastor (Angelicradio) 8/10

I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT ABOUT THEM THAT I SHIP I JUST DO φ(゜▽゜*)♪ i blame YOU honestly rn this ship is either Adam found Al after the fight n they make a deal or they're in heaven n they chillin this ship is confusing:D

They're angels on heaven

Adam gone back into eden n do shit differently

This is both Adam/Eve n Adam/Alastor kinda

Adam x Alastor x Lucifer (Angelicradioapple/ Charlie's dads (only me call them that lol)) 9/10

''Hey Charlie u know how u r sad that your mother left? Wellllllll i got you 2 new dads suprise:DDDD''

Look 3 miserable men who hate each other + hell's greatest dad + my love for Dadam = Messy ass old men yaoi :DDDD n it work perfectly with Alastor Asexuality too!!! Like Adam n Lucifer could fuck each other brains out before Al joining in for the cuddles lol

Chaos ensue

Not exactly a love triangle but a love corner but hey we barely got food here :D

I cant believe how hot this shit is lol

Adam x Eve x Lilith x Lucifer (Eden poly/ applecore?) 8/10

They could have been all married to each other(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ But as much as i go "OooOooo Poly yay'' i just cant vibe with EvexLucifer, like the cheating vibes is wayyyyyyyyy too much i just cant man . I mean with the interpetation that Lucifer came to Eden to hang out with the humans they all know eachother, they're a throuple yes but BUT when Eve came into the picture it was only with Adam n him only so the other 2 is ehhhh. Im fine with EvexLilith cause im seeing it happening later, not hidden from Adam while LuciferxEve got that deception going on .So uhhh in this ship they're more like bestie than lovers to me¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Also AdamxLilith is an underrated pairing like everytime i saw this applecore thing going on these 2 r at most tolerate each other like cmonnnnn we already twist this to hell n back, why cant we make it so their arguement was a petty non-malicious one n they still cares for each other hmm???

They're one happy family

IDK what to tell u bittersweet reunion n loving family is the only typa fic u get with this ship

Not that im complaining i need this wholesomeness

Adam x Mammon (Adammon/Madam/Greedyguitar/ 1st chirstmas.... hasnt had an offical name yet) 10/10

They r litteraly same person different font idk what to tell u. More insults thrown around than Guitarspear but they're pretty similar. Adam is just " sinners suck ass but this dude is the worst in the best way". Also they're both big bois (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧ , they love towering over others

I'm sorry but there r barely BARELY

any fics of them :(

The art side is more plentiful tho :D

Adam x Angel Dust (Holydust/guitardust) 5/10

THEY ARE BESTIES YOUR HONOUR n that the exact reason why i cant see them be together as a couple 100%, like the shit-talking bff vibes r wayyyy too strong XD Angel finally got someone who have the same vulgar humour as him n if Adam got married in hell Angel would 100% be his best bitch of honour (≧∀≦)ゞq(≧▽≦q)

They're best friends who have casual no-string attached sex that is ACTUALLY no-string attached:)))

I came to ship them due to those "What if they're co-workers under Val' scenarios ive been seeing on Tumblr

I got like 1 fic on ao3 i mean if u r looking for just platonic friendship between them then rest asure most Adam's redemption fics have that

I got 1 fic on tumblr

Adam x Charlie (Charadam/Guitarprincess) 5/10

U know this ship give me a pretty bad first impression since a good chunk of the fics r either heavy non-con shit or lean wayyyyy to much into the daddy kink, ya know how Charlie got suppose daddy issues n all that jazz?:))) yeah that... that

But after seeing the art side of this ship im chillin with them now, since the art r pretty wholesome, usually having them decked out in punk-rock clothings hanging out. It's a big "Fuck you" to Lucifer n i live for these mf argueing ╰(*°▽°*)╯

So uhhh stay away from the fics if ya want an actual functional couple instead of wtv messed up shit we got there:))) But here's a fic anyway, the only one where it feel bearable n actual trynna go into said messed up relationship i already warn you

We got cracks like Guitarmaid (AdamxNifty), Valadam (AdamxVal) which i dont have enough materials to decied, Classicalrock (AdamxSera) sound interesting but also havent found anything , Guitarhalo (AdamxEmily) is an unexpected find, find i deem them to be more familial than romantic so we'll see if there's a fic good enough to convince me

Edit:i forgot to add Blitzo like Mammon already there why did i forgot

Adam x Blitzo (i dont think anyone even ship this but me:)) 7/10

I cant find a single fic where they has anything more than a 1 nightstand n 1 interaction where they hit it off , i live off imagination alone (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`) but like fr fr they would match so well, like their bloodlust n general jerkiness would make them the 3rd asshole x asshole ship on this list :DDDD

Tho as much as i wanna see them go further i feel like an on-n-off relationship/friends with benefits fit em more ya know ( *^-^)ρ(*╯^╰) If ya have any fic but the 2 here that have them interact lemme know cause a bitch need food :)

This is a lot of tag(._. )

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kakabelorias · 2 months

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I like blondes! It's not my fault they all happen to be twinks!

Random lil headcanon blurb for each one bc im foaming at the mouth to share my simping of them with everyone

Lucifer would probably like to wear matching duckling onesies as you have a nice night in one of those pinterest fairy light blanket forts.

Tom would turn his dressing room into a room dedicated to your likes and tastes so you can stay comfortable in there while he works.

Peter would wrap his wings around you whenever you hug and cuddle-they tend to spread out a little when he's really happy.

Lastly, I think they'd all cry in your arms for various reasons. Maybe he just really loves you and is being over dramatic about it. Maybe he's had a rough day and your embrace brings down his walls. Maybe he learned of the exterminations and it's a lot for him to handle.

oh and also they're all definitely switches but are very subby bottoms lmao i dont make the rules, okay?

#hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #Saint Peter #Tom Trench #x Reader #Hazbin Hotel x Reader #st peter #st peter hazbin hotel #lucifer magne #hazbin hotel tom trench

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bones4thecats · 17 days

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What If They Had A Family? - Hazbin Hotel (PT.2)

Type of Writing: Random Idea Name: What If They Had A Family? (PT.2) Characters: Alastor (LINK), Adam, St. Peter, and Lucifer Morningstar Idea-Giver: Random Ideas

A/N: The readers here are all female besides in Alastor's, which I themed gender-neutral. You can tell who my favorite here is lol

⚠️ Trigger Warnings: Swearing and Death ⚠️ Spoilers for: S1 ⚠️

✧⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋄✧⋄⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋆⋄✧⋄⋅⋆⋄✧⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋆⋄✧⋄⋅⋆⋄✧⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅

Link to Alastor Post:

What Are They Like As Parents? - Hazbin Hotel

Angel-Third-Wife! Reader ; Red-and-Green Macaw

🎸 Adam has lost his first two wives to the same exact man. I mean for crying out loud, this guy needs a break

🎸 When Adam had first met you, he was very weary at first. Every single other wife of his had run off with the same god-forsaken guy, so do you really blame him for his distrust?

🎸 It took a little while, but the first man did take notice at how you gave him the time to get used to you and trust you, and while you didn’t know it, he warmed up to you really fast when you had cleaned his guitar off and handed it to him while requesting a song

" Let me guess, you want one of the best fuckin’ musicians in history to sing for ya’? You’ve got good taste, love. "

🎸 He absolutely adores you, and when you had finally sealed the deal, he loved talking about having children. He did have two, but they didn’t exactly end well…

🎸 You just smiled and spoke with him deeply, making sure he understood what he really wanted, you didn’t want him regretting his actions or getting in over his head when you did eventually get pregnant

🎸 When your baby girl, which you named Harmonia, came into Heaven, Adam was beyond happy. He planned on spoiling your child until his final breath

🎸 She had caught yours and his wing patterns, so they were large much like her fathers and were blue with Adam’s signature light yellow stripe. And he would swear every time she flapped her wings, she would give him another heart attack. His baby girl was growing up so fast!

🎸 Now, to the real juicy stuff

🎸 Adam is very provocative, so there is no doubt that one of your daughter’s first words is a swear, most likely the f-word

" You mother- " " Fucker! " " That's my girl! I’m so proud of you! " " Adam! " " What? She spoke! Swearing or not, still a word, toots. "

🎸 You’re gonna get a headache from their actions. Thank god Lute is right alongside you whenever Adam brings his baby to work with the excuse that he’d miss her

Angel! Reader ; Bombus Auricomus (Kind of Bumblebee)

📑 St. Peter and you had a mutual understanding, children was something you wanted to handle later on

📑 When you did eventually bring the conversation back up, St. Peter just smiled and held your hands in his as he said he had a surprise for you that he thought you’d enjoy

📑 As he covered you eye with a bandanna, your husband brought you down your home’s hallway and opened and door before you heard his wings flap nervously and he tore the fabric away from your eyes

📑 Your eyes widened as you looked at the small nursery, it was colored a pastel yellow with tiny pastel flowers along the bottom and tiny things of honeycomb with bees flying around. And right above the crib was a tiny cot mobile themed with books and bees

" Oh my god… it’s- it’s perfect, my dear. Thank you so much… "

📑 When you and St. Peter talked a bit more on the topic, you guys did eventually conceive a baby, one that you would later identify as your baby boy

📑 Your time in childbirth was magical for St. Peter, as he was nervously pacing and screaming as you practically squashed his hand in your grip. How were you not a warrior angel?!

📑 He no doubt passed out during the ordeal

📑 He had awoken in the chair next to your bed with a glass of water and a couple pills next to the glass. But he ignored it and looked over at you, who was asleep and holding your baby boy

📑 When you awoke, St. Peter pledged the name Favus, which in Latin meant Honeycomb. And when you looked at your son’s tiny light yellow bee wings, you smiled and kissed your husband’s cheek, saying it was perfect

📑 Your husband and son bond so much as he ages. While St. Peter is normally busy with things at Heaven’s Gates, he always takes time to be around his family

📑 He adores to teach your son how to sing. Singing is something that he is spectacular at, so he would love it if his son bonded with him on that

📑 And when his first word came out? No doubt he passed out once more

" D- Dada! " " Did you just- holy saints… you just said… " *faints* " Peter! "

Fallen-Angel! Reader ; Bee Hummingbird

🍎 Lucifer is slightly hesitant when it comes to having any more children. He didn’t want to have a bad relationship with them like how he used to with Charlie, even though it was far better now

🍎 While you were understanding at first, you were growing self-conscious, did he just not want kids with you?

🍎 Once Charlie brought the topic up to her father, the King of Hell just broke down, he was ruining another relationship?! You surely wanted to leave him just like Lilith did all those years ago…

🍎 Charlie just sighed and gave her dad a piece of paper, one with many ideas that could possible help him. But he only looked for a couple seconds before getting the best idea he’s ever had, besides fixing his bond with Charlie and being with you, of course

🍎 Lucifer had brought you out to a small and untouched field just outside of Pentagram City and handed you a bouquet full of bleeding heart flowers, cardinal flowers, fireweed, and trumpet honeysuckles

" My Queen, I just wanted to come somewhere secluded to speak about the possibilities of a family between us. I really want us to move onto the next chapter of our lives, and I’m sure that Charlie would like for us to as well. " " Really? " " Of course. I love you more than anything else in existence, both mine in Heaven and in Hell. There is nobody else I would do this with than you. " " And Lilith. " " I'm going to ignore that comment… "

🍎 Charlie and the rest of the Hotel were beyond happy for you guys when it was announced you were having your first born son, hell, even Alastor hugged you and handed you a small deer leather slippers, he even made sure they were extra soft for you

🍎 Lucifer just hugged you from behind as Charlie pulled everyone into a group hug, crying about how happy she was to have a baby brother coming into Hell, and she said she couldn’t wait to see how adorable he looked

🍎 When your son did finally come out and looked into his father and mother’s eyes, you guys knew how right Charlie was. He was beyond cute

🍎 His tiny yellow and red eyes, red cheeks, and yellow-tinted ‘hair’ that he inherited from his father while tiny fluttering wings, a slightly long tail similar to the Goetia family’s, and a small beak with feathers for hair that came from you just made him so sweet looking, as if he belonged in Heaven with the rest of the Morningstar family

" What should we name him, Lu’? " " Hm, how about Anaticula? It means duckling in Latin. " " Perfect… our little humming-duckling. "

🍎 As Anaticula aged, it was apparent how much like his father he was. He was very silly and talented despite his immense power from his fallen-angel parents

🍎 By the way, his first words are most likely something related to redemption or ducks, since Charlie and Lucifer ramble about the two topic quite often

" It’s just, the redemption was proven to work with Pentious. That means Heaven may rethink their choice! " " Redeemed ducky? " " Did he just…? " " My baby boy just said his first words! Oh, how splendid. Charlie! Call Y/N, she must hear this immediately! "

🍎 He loves to brag about his son in front of Alastor as well, he may now have a baby and new wife to care for at home, but your husband just has to rub this into that Radio Demon’s snout!

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spiderlily-w1tch-blog · 1 month

Text

𝙻𝚞𝚌𝚒𝚏𝚎𝚛(𝙾𝙼!) - 𝙼𝚘𝚟𝚒𝚎 𝙽𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝

𝕎𝕀𝕊ℙ𝕊𝕀𝕄ℙ𝕊

— — —

Ft Sitting in his lap, oviposition, Fingering, belly bulge, background incest; Ft They/He pronouns for Asmo

𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫: I do not own Obey Me! or its characters, all credit goes to its creators and actors

WC: 3,336

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆: Includes sibling incest and Oviposition, No Use of Y/n

【Ｍａｓｔｅｒｌｉｓｔ】

— — —

You sit in Luci’s lap, back flush against his chest while your legs are spread over his knees. His hands on your hips stroke up and down your sides, eventually sliding forward to dip between your thighs. You squeak in surprise at the motion but quickly cover it up as surprise at the movie scene. You’re almost sure that the brothers already know what the eldest is doing but you don’t want it to be too obvious, anyhow.

“Lift your hips, darling,” Luci mutters into your ear as he slides his hands back up to run his fingertips over the waistband of your sleep shorts. You send a quick glance around the room and see all their attention firmly on the glowing screen in the dark room.

Beel sat on the closest couch adjacent to you with Belphie in between his legs, resting back into his twin, Beel’s arms wrapped around him. Mammon is sat just on the other end of the couch you and Luci are on, resting his head on his forearm while Satan, sat in an armchair just beside him, vacantly runs his fingers through his white hair. Levi is on the couch furthest from us, legs crossed, with Asmo’s head resting in his lap, lazily playing with the older’s fingers where his hand rests on their collarbone, the other playing with a strand of Asmo’s hair.

Calming your rapid heartbeat, you follow Luci’s command and lift your hips for him to slip your shorts off your body. While he isn’t exactly subtle about it, it doesn’t seem to attract the attention of the others. Even Asmo seems enamored with the movie scene. He reaches between your thighs and pulls them apart, exposing your pussy to the cool air, sending a shiver down your spine. Sliding his hands higher between your thighs, he begins to play with your pretty little cunt.

Two of his fingers slip into you, moving slowly enough to not make any noise, but unfortunately, it’s slow enough to feel like torture for your aching heat. He leans down and starts peppering kisses over your neck and lightly nibbling every so often.

“You’re so wet, darling,” he whispers into your ear, “is it that you’re turned on by the fact we have company?” He takes your earlobe in between his teeth and lets go to lick at your neck, making you hold back a moan.

Your thighs clamp closed around his hands still toying with your pussy as you bring a hand up to cover your mouth to hold in your moan. His words aren’t far from the truth, the fact that everyone is so close and could just look over and see exactly what you two are doing is exhilarating and it makes you wetter than you ever would have thought.

His index and middle fingers of his free hand slide up your slit to slowly rub circles over your clit. A moan almost breaks free as your entire body tenses up and your back presses further into his chest. Your knees come up as your thighs clench tighter while your whole body shakes at the shock of pleasure that shoots through your being. Your thighs quiver as you feel your orgasm wash over you, spilling into his hand.

You know that your wetness has long since coated the front of his pants and you can feel more dripping down as he fingers you. You throw your head back onto his shoulder with rapid short breaths as he speeds his fingers up, now ruthlessly toying with your pussy. Your hand stays clamped over your mouth as he licked, sucked, and bit your neck.

“I can already feel how tight you are, darling. Are you really that ready for me?” Lucifer teases you as he sucks on the sensitive spot just under your ear.

“M-mhm!” Your voice, while still restricted by your hand, comes out as a whine, one you desperately hope his brothers didn’t hear. By the twitch of Mammon’s shoulder when you squeaked out your answer, it seems, at least he did. By far, he’s the closest one to you both so you suppose it wasn’t too surprising.

“Then get ready, my love,” You could hear the smirk in the eldest’s voice as the hand rubbing over your clit slides out of the tight hold your thighs are creating. He shuffles you around just enough to reach down and open his pants to shuffle them down enough to release his cocks. You don’t have to see them to know what you’re in for, you had them memorized by now.

He has one slightly longer cock and one slightly thicker. The thicker one has a more oddly shaped tip, it’s narrow and with a longer slit and more flared out with a frilled ridge jutting out at the flat tip. The longer one has ribs all along the shaft and leads up to a more narrow and pointed tip.

When he releases them from the confines of his pants, you let out a small gasp when you feel them bob up and slap against your cunt. The noise was audible enough that you’re almost certain that the rest of the boys heard it. Once Luci was satisfied with how wet you are and how much he’s stretched your pretty little pussy, he slides his fingers out of your folds and lets the wetness that had been trapped inside slip out and drool onto his cocks.

As he pulls his fingers away from your now painfully empty hole, he coaxes your thighs open once more. He repositions you so that your knees are on the couch beside his thighs, still facing the TV. He grabs your hip with one hand and lifts you up enough that he could position his cocks at your entrance, all the while getting a nice glimpse of your dripping and ready little cunt, all for him.

The more pleasure Luci gives you, and the more he teases you with it, you find yourself caring less and less about keeping yourself quiet. You know that more likely than not, all of the others already know exactly what’s happening, even if they’re not actively watching you.

Wait.

Opening your eyes, you see that pairs of eyes were on the two of you as Luci strokes his pointed tip through your folds. Three of them. Asmo was openly watching you now, their eyes drifting between your pleasured face to where you’re almost connected with his elder brother. He’s now laying on his side, still holding onto Levi’s hand, but more so having the older’s fingers stroke over their collarbone and neck.

Mammon was trying to be more discreet about it. Trying, and failing, that is. His head is slightly turned towards you as his eyes continue to flick to you and watch you for a bit before glancing back at the TV, but before long they’re on you once again. He’s sitting up more, now holding Satan’s hand rather than letting it comb through his hair.

Beel wasn’t quite as shameless as Asmo but he wasn’t really even trying to be discreet. Similarly to Asmo, his eyes rake over you multiple times and end up right back at your cunt hovering just over Lucifer’s cocks. Unlike Asmo and Mammon, he doesn’t seem overly fascinated by Lucifer’s ovipositor, though he does keep returning his gaze to it. It seems like he’s just waiting to see if you’d actually take it, and when he looks at your face, he looks like he’s searching for some kind of reaction.

Eventually, through the pleasure haze that had almost completely engulfed your mind, you deduce it was likely because he, too, has an Ovipositor. It seems like he’s gauging your reaction to it to see if you had any distaste towards it. The thought made you feel a bit bad for him, though that’s quickly wiped from your mind. As is everything else.

Lucifer finally spears you on his slightly longer cock, the surprise knocking you out of your thoughts with a moan punched out of you. It wasn’t overly loud, but it was certainly louder than any moan you’ve released thusly. He pulls you down and up his cock a couple of times to fully coat it in your juices before he positions his other cock at your entrance. He reaches his other hand up to grasp your empty hip and rub soothing circles with his thumbs before he starts easing you down onto both of his thick cocks.

Then, unabashedly, you let out a whiny moan that was clearly heard over the movie. That gets everyone else looking at you, and Mammon to stop (failing at) hiding his gaze. Even Belphie who had been just on the edge of completely passing out woke up enough to turn and look at you both from where he’s cuddled up in his twin’s arms.

When Luci had you fully seated in his lap, he was gracious enough to let you get used to him inside you even with how much he just wants to fuck you dumb and breed you until you can’t remember your own name. Not very long after, you’re grinding your hips with needy moans streaming from your lips.

“P-please.. Luci..” You mewl. Smirking, he looks around the room at his brothers and sees them all staring at you and where you’re connected. He feels a swell of cockiness surge through him at the stares as he could showcase that you’re all his.

His grip on your waist tightened enough that he could help you rise up until only his tips were left and slams you back down. He barely let gravity do any of the work as he uses his own strength to force you down. His cocks both hit the perfect spots inside you with the thrust and it has you letting out a loud, slutty that sounded straight from a porno.

“You ready, darling? Ready to take all of me? Take my eggs, darling?” He asks, loud enough for you to hear while you added to his momentum by desperately trying to bounce on his dicks. His volume was also loud enough for his brothers to hear, though he does wonder if they heard him over your cries. With the wind being knocked out of you with each hard meeting of your hips, you could only let out hiccuped murmurs of approval.

As he feels you set your hands on his thighs to help yourself thrust your hips down on him, he lets one hand release your waist and travel up and under your loose shirt. Well, technically it’s his shirt, but he loves seeing you in his clothes so much that he’s practically declared that it’s yours. His hand travels up and grasps your bare tit. With his hand moving up your torso from behind, the shirt lifted up at well, making his actions clearly visible. So with your tit in hand, he helps you bounce desperately on his cocks, unashamedly groaning at your tightness.

“Fuck, darling, you’re squeezing me so tight. So perfectly tight. You’ll make sure none of our young fall out, won’t you, darling? You’ll make sure to keep every one of my eggs right here, inside you.” His other hand slides from your hip to your lower belly and presses down as the bulge in your stomach appears from how deep he is inside you. You moaned out at the feeling as it adds to all the sensations he’s giving you.

“Y-yes..! Promise! Promise, Luci! I’ll keep them a-all inside! Fuck..!” You cry out in response as you felt all the sensations at once. You moan loudly when his hand slides lower on your torso to reach your clit. His fingers begin to toy with your sensitive bud once again. Just as he did that, his other hand shifts from simply groping to actively pinching and pulling your nipple. All the pleasure at once brings you to your second orgasm.

“Ohh, fuck, love, you just tightened up so much…” Luci groans and has to slide his hand back to your hip to help you continue to move in his lap.

When your hips prove just too exhausted and slightly sore to continue with your previous rhythm, he begins to thrust his hips up into you. As he moves his hips against yours, he heard a deep groan from the couch adjacent to yours. He almost doesn’t bother to look as he’s so caught up in you and the pleasure you’re giving each other, but curiosity got the better of him.

He looks up and sees Beel and Belphie both still stealing glances at you while Beel had his twin grinding in his lap with one hand on his hip and the other down the front of his pants. Even while they got their own pleasure from each other, they can’t help but stare at you and how he thrusts up into you. His pride swells, as does his possessiveness. He halts your movements for only a moment, though neither of you stopped grinding against each other while he slides both his hands up your shirt to pull it fully off your body.

With that, he returns to his movements but adds sitting up more so that he has access to your neck and shoulders. While he thrusts up into you, his cocks now meeting your cervix, he starts to bite and suck on your neck to clearly claim you as his. When he does, your hand flies up to grab at his black locks, lightly tugging to try and ground yourself when you feel yourself on the edge of pure, mind-numbing bliss.

His pointed tip rams into your cervix again and again and you can feel the very tip trying to bully its way through. You feel his thicker cock start to swell and you instinctively knew that he’s getting close to the main event.

“F-fuck- Lu-Luci!!” You cry out, barely being able to formulate your sentence, “I- I feel it-! I feel it!!” You nearly scream out at the feeling. He grunts into your shoulder at the feeling of you clenching around him. Or rather, you’re not clenching, no his eggs are ready to enter your womb and his ovipositor cock is swelling to accommodate them and how delicate they are.

“Holy shit…” You both hear a voice mutter from the couch furthest from you. Throwing your head back onto Lucifer’s shoulder and used the angle to lazily gaze at the couch. There, you saw Asmo licking up and down Levi’s cock, though only breaking their gaze on you to look up at Levi to see his low-lidded eyes trained on you. Vaguely, you glance over at Mammon and Statan to see them both jacking off, Mammon watching the whole show, while Satan kept his gaze firmly on you, seemingly avoiding any sight of Lucifer.

Another gush of wetness seeps from your cunny as Lucifer still has you going up and down and up and down. When you lazily turn your head on his shoulder to face him, Luci turned his face to yours and met you with a kiss. Your lips moved perfectly in sync and your tongues tangled like an aggressive, elegant dance. You felt his thrusts becoming sloppy and you knew he was close so you’re happily anticipating when he’ll slam your hips together and keep you still on him.

Just as you’d predicted, it wasn’t long before he brought your hips down hard on his and holds you firmly against him. You didn’t know what to expect when he would insert his eggs inside you, but you prepare yourself anyhow. Hardly a second after he brought you two stiffly together, you feel his thicker cock head’s frills move as sort of searcher-feelers. Suddenly, it firmly sets itself, almost like suction, against your cervix.

Then you feel it.

An egg pushes through his ovipositor and you feel its journey as it creates a bulb moving up the tube before reaching the slit and pushing its way through your cervix, directly into your womb. You see stars when it passes through your cervix and it sends a shock through your body, making you clench around him. He groans at the feeling of your cunt clamping around him and sets his hands gently on your hips and draws nonsensical shapes with his fingertips to get you to relax.

Your walls relax as much as you can make them and you feel the presence of another egg making its way through his breeding tube. Your breath hitched when it pushed its way into your womb as you tried to stay calm enough to keep your cunny nice and pliant for him.

After the third egg, you lose count of how many eggs force their way into your fertile womb. All you know is that there are enough to make your stomach bulge even further than just the presence of his enormous cocks makes. Looking down and seeing your bump, you force your exhausted arms to move to rub over your swollen belly, caressing where Lucifer is planting his- no, both of your young.

“Now… All that’s left is to fertilize them, darling.” Lucifer whispers lovingly into your ear as his grip tightens, though stays conscious of your now swollen belly, swollen with his eggs that you would carry, “You’re going to be such a good mother, my love. You’ll be so gorgeous all round and plump with my children growing inside you. And these tits,” he moves to cup your breasts, squeezing them for emphasis, “will be delectably swollen with milk.”

He slightly pinches your nipples between his knuckles as he engulfs your entire breasts with his large hands and gropes with a heavy sigh of pleasure. Releasing your breasts, he slides his hands back down to your waist and gently moves you to prepare you for the last round of blissful pleasure before he releases inside you.

“Ready?” He asks, though more as a warning than for actual confirmation. You give him a dumb nod, anyways, even knowing this. He chuckled at your dumbified form, truly seeing how he ducked the thoughts right from your head. His strong arms lift you up before sliding you back down on his cocks, sighing out at the sensitivity of his freshly used ovipositor rubbing against your squishy walls. He repeats the motion, steadily going faster until he’s fucking up into you again, though careful not to jostle you too much for the risk of any eggs escaping.

He can feel his release fastly approaching, his pointed-tipped cock extending just a bit before he’s ready. He then slams you down again, his pointed, narrow tip nudging into your now bullied open cervix, and shoots his load. Thick, hot cum floods your womb, load after load spilling inside you. His cum entirely fills your womb to the brim, even spilling out from being so full. Your stomach bulges even more.

You can’t help but feel so full and satisfied and entirely blissed out. You have the vague passing thought that it’s a wonder you haven’t passed out yet. Finally, when Lucifer stops cumming, he loosens his grip and simply holds you tenderly. His hands slide up and down your sides in a comforting motion before gingerly moving to your stomach and tenderly stroking the extended skin.

“Our young. Right here, my love. Our young are going to start growing soon, right inside here,” he smiles into the crook of your neck and places soft kisses on the skin, showing just how much he loves you and how much he will continue to love you as you carry his brood.

Faintly, you recognize the sounds of the others entering their blissful satisfaction. You can’t bring yourself to spare any more thought to it as you focus, as much as you can, on the feelings of love swelling for your lover and the young now implanted inside you.

— — —

𝕋𝕒𝕘𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥:

@frosch-thefrog

#cw public sex #tw public sex #cw exhibitionism #tw exhibitionism #cw inc*st #tw inc*st #lucifer x reader #obey me lucifer x reader #obey me x reader #obey me smut #spiderlily spells

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