VHSCC OH MY GOD
(no spoilers)
Starkid nation, you aren't ready.
So let's start with the obvious. Look, I spent thirteen years growing up with Starkid. That initial Michigan gang are deeply special to me and I will always miss Dylan, Brian R., and Corey in any show they aren't in. And this one's no different. But just as Janaya came in and took over Belle from Britney so flawlessly, Curt, Brian, and AJ were all WONDERFUL in their new roles. The gentle-but-high-energy, truly decent, romantic himbo charm Curt brought to our Springsteen boy Jim (you all are going to LOVE Jim, I promise) perfectly offset the defiant, sneering anger of Young Scrooge in "That Scrooge." Brian's reactions (particularly to the "rather take my own life" line) were so funny and some of my favorite parts of the show. And AJ... this is now my favorite thing AJ has ever done. And that's saying something. The smaller casting shake-up moments (Joey as Fezziwig, other little line re-distributions) were so fun as well!
The new act 1 is PERFECTION. I was actually surprised by how absolutely hysterical it was? Like, I won't tell you what was up with that clip on Instagram of Brian, Lauren, and Joey doing a freak-out dance, but I can tell you that their whole Act 1 deal threatened to steal the show every. Single. Time. I already mentioned Curt as Jim, but you will also love Della, who is so funny and real and truly carries us through the start of the show (Janaya is a STAR and she Curt have brilliant chemistry). Ali did a terrific job of balancing the sadness and hope that are both at the center of the devastating little Match Girl. And Jamie's Grandma... well, honestly I have no idea how to talk about Jamie's song without giving stuff away.
But the real star of the show in Act 1, as he should be, was our man Clark. I can't emphasize enough how much he nailed the writing of this whole new act. I mentioned that the new stuff is hilarious, but it's also deeply heartfelt, and also sad exactly when it needs to be. Like, the transition after Jamie's song? I can't really talk about it yet, but what that moment does with emotion is unreal. And, as expected, every song is a banger! My one complaint about this show, and it IS a big one, is that there is no cast recording of the Act 1 songs. I want to listen to them all the time.
But the good news is, I CAN listen to Christmas Carol as much as I want! The classic that started it all is back, with so many people reprising the hell out of their truly iconic roles (God I love the VHS Cratchits), and better than ever. I traditionally hate change, and I love the version of VHSCC Live! we already have so much, but I think I somehow loved this version even more? The staging is alive and clever and there are some additions and changes, particularly in "Final Ghost"/"Christmas Day," that frankly blew my mind and somehow managed to elevate the material even further. I can't wait for the digital ticket to come out so that I can talk about them. To put it simply, James Tolbert mastered his Starkid directorial debut like you won't believe. I'm so proud of him and grateful for the larger role he's taken in Starkid since they moved base to LA.
Also, the Ghost of Christmas Past is extra unhinged this year? Jaime pulled out all of the impish stops and it was the BEST.
Basically, everyone more than delivered. I haven't talked about Meredith yet but she rocked it in the band and continued to validate the hell out of my opinion that "3 Spirits" is the dark horse best song in the show.
And a special shout-out to June Saito for continuing to be a costuming GENIUS. I always love her work and this production is no exception. I honestly wanted to give the return of the Bob Cratchit costume its own round of applause.
You know, the world is a mess and everything is pretty much terrible. It's been a hard year in an impossible decade. But every once in a while you come across some art that takes all of that, acknowledges the truth of it, and somehow pulls back the curtains to harness the joy and hope that's still there under the rubble. To me, Starkid in particular has always been about finding and holding onto the hope and the beauty and humanity that allows us to endure an existence that can so often feel bleak. And VHSCC is maybe the most perfect encapsulation of that idea.
So thank you Clark, James, Meredith, Brian, and everyone who worked so hard on this little bit of magic. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Let's make a little light.
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🪓 Nerdy Prudes Must Die - Some Thoughts 🪓
I decided to rewatch NPMD (second day in a row 🙈) and wanted to write down some random thoughts and reactions because why the fuck not 😌
‼️ SPOILERS FOR NPMD BELOW ‼️
I loved this show from the second it started omg I love things about murder 🤭
“Riiiiichie… Riiiiiichie…” — kind of gave off IT vibes ngl
They really killed off Jon Matteson’s nerd character in the first 35 seconds 💀
“They twisted his nipples off 🤣” - WHY WAS HE SO HAPPY ABOUT IT
THE PROJECTION OF THE TITLE IN THE VICTIM’S BLOOD, STARKID HAD HELLA BUDGET FOR THIS SHOW 🙌🏻
“🎵I’m dead…the blood is arbitrating from my head🎵” needs to become a trending TikTok sound or something oh my fucking gOD
LAUREN YOU QUEEN 🙌🏻👏🏻 also living for that fucking wig
MARIAHHHHHHH 🎵❤️
Definitely felt the “High School is Killin’ Me” “I’m so fucking dead” in my soul even though I’m a full ass adult now
“I was deep in a Twitter fight about a problematic puppy” ROFL OMFG
Joey as Peter Spankoffski 😭👏🏻
ANGELA AS GRACE CHASITY HELL FUCKIN YEAH SHE IS EATING THIS PART UP
We all knew someone at school who snitched to the teachers lbh 💀
“So you don’t wanna be bullied?” “No, I wanna be invisible.” “…then why do you come to public school dressed in suspenders and a fucking bow tie?” - PLEAAAASE 💀🤣
MICRO-PETER 😂💀
Joey taking off his glasses and going “oh god” under his breath, “IT’S NOT ACTUALLY A MICROPENIS”… oh he ATE the role, R*bert who?!?
“My titties are tenderised” - I MEAN SAME BUT-?!?
“I didn’t know you were funny.” “Neither did I.” “I like funny guys.” — I AM SORRY BUT IM ALREADY SHIPPING HARD
Actually obsessed with Richie’s hair and outfit like I can’t explain it other than I’m obsessed
IT’S MAX JÄGERMAN
“Ohh well there’s a difference between intent and impact - I learnt that at an anti bullying assembly last month, FUCK NUGGET” took me off guard tbh like I know I’m tired and easily surprised but still 🤭
GRACE CHASITY PROTESTING THE CO-ED HOMECOMING DANCE I CANNOT-
Jägerman is literally the archetype of the school bully jock who peaked in high school like omg but also he’s into Grace?!?!
“I run laps in the gym and I don’t want to slip on any SPUNK” - FUCKING HELL
“Can I carry your books for you?” “Carry my books? 🤢 I don’t think either of us are ready for that, I mean we’re only 18!”
“My little dirty girl.” — 😳😲😮💨
“I am only one man’s girl, Max, and his name is Jesus Christ!” — IM FUCKING HOWLING ANGELA KILLED THE DELIVERY OF THAT LINE I CANT-
“I’m a literal monster!” - oh so Max is self aware then 🤔
“This is politics, Stephanie 🙄 learn to multitask!”
I love that Starkid keep casting Corey as Mariah’s dad?!?
Stephanie is apparently her father’s “October surprise”… so her birthday is in October, like Hannah Foster’s? 🤔
“Stephanie, please, I’d like to have an intelligent conversation with you - in other words, shut up” - DAMN WHAT A BURN
NOOO NOT HER PHONE 😰 (I am also addicted to my phone so I get it lol)
NOT STEPHANIE THROWING HER HAND BETWEEN HER PHONE AND THE HAMMER OMFG (same though)
Mayor Lauter really said “I don’t give a shit if you lie, steal or cheat to get your grades up, just don’t get caught” - spoken like a true politician
“How am I supposed to study without listening to Spotify?!?” probably should not have resonated with me like it did 🤭
Peter trying to make a joke and Richie and Ruth not getting it is so relatable tbh
I’m obsessed with Ruth’s mushroom jumper tbh
“I just want someone to touch me… anyone, PLEASE” — ROFL (same girl)
“What was it like when she touched your arm?… DID YOU CUM?!?” — 💀💀💀💀
“You and Steph, it’s a fantasy - like a boy and his anime love pillows. It’s a beautiful dream, but I’ll never hold the real Rei or Asuka in my arms.” — I AM PISSING MYSELF LAUGHING JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
“I’m such a loser, telemarketers hang up on me” 💀😭
DID RICHIE JUST FUCKING SAY “NANI!” JESUS FUCKING CHRIST I CANT DEAL WITH THIS SHOW 🤣
Richie and Ruth climbing Pete like a tree and demanding to know what Stephanie is saying is so ridiculously funny 😆
“Really, Ruth? A Star Wars analogy? Need I go into why Attack on Titan is superior in every possible way?” — STARKID UNDERSTAND THE NERDS I LOVE IT
“You’re telling me I gotta be funny again?!? I didn’t do it on purpose the first time!”
“Pete, you’ve been given a once in a lifetime opportunity - someone’s willing to tolerate your presence for a whole evening! This may never happen again!” — damn wish that would happen to me 😭🙈
Not Pete getting a boner during “Cool as I think I am” 🙈
Nooooo not Max finding Pete before he could go into the restaurant to meet Stephanie 😭
“I’m sick of your ssshhhhit!” — YES PETEY STAND UP TO HIM
The fact Max said “Rendezvous” as “Randay-Voose” 💀
The way it transitioned from “say your prayers” to the Chasity family going “AMEN” was PERFECTION
Grace’s father referring to his wife as “mother” is…something 💀
“He came up to me in the hallway and he asked if he could carry my books.” “Oh, Mark - I didn’t know that sort of thing happened at Hatchetfield High! Do you think you should call the boy’s father?” — ?!?!?!
“Mom, will you pass the butt stuff? The butter. Butter. Will you pass the butter? (Chuckles nervously) I just want some head and butter. BREAD! Bread! Bread and butt-sex to go with this big shaft of meat I’m gonna choke down. Oh boy…oh criminy!” - THE SCREECH I GAVE WAS UNHOLY
“I’ve just got some butterflies in my tummy; and they’re flying REAL low today” 😭💀🙈
GRACE FANTASISING ABOUT MAX IN THE BATH I CANNOT DEAL WITH THIS
“Brewing up a big ol’ pot of dirty girl soup” - ABSOLUTELY NOT 💀
HES FUCKING SHIRTLESS WHAT THE FUCK-
“Everyone’s got their secrets, and this one’s mine. I love… Jesus! 😃” - this was when I definitely knew she was fantasising because ain’t no fucking way-
WAS THE DIRTY GIRL SONG SUPPOSED TO BE VIEWED AS HOT BECAUSE I AM VERY FLUSTERED AND CONFUSED AND TOTALLY VIBING WITH THE TUNE
🎵 DIRTY DIRTY GIRL WON’T YOU PRAY FOR ME🎵
You see, if Christian parents didn’t repress their teenager’s hormones and sexuality then MAYBE their teenagers wouldn’t resort to murder 🙃
Grace’s dad saying he’s going to get the plunger when she said she was doing a big poop 😭💀
Grace really thinks that impure thoughts only happen after marriage and I almost envy her innocence
“Money isn’t everything… looks are.” - yeah no that about sums people up in this day and age 😑
“We thought you were waifu material, but you’re just a bully” — NOT WAIFU MATERIAL 💀
PETE’S BLACK EYE NOOOO 😭🥺
Grace is kind of a psychopath and I’m loving that for her tbh
“I’m not comfortable with the plan if it involves that kind of language” but she’s comfortable with filming someone getting terrified and pissing their pants 💀
The “the place is not structurally sound” comment was DEFINITELY foreshadowing
“I get pus in my pits!” Jesus ☠️
🎵🤌🏻we’re gonna bully the bully🤌🏻🎵
“We’re gonna cut off his nips!” - what is with the obsession with n!pples in this show 😳
I’M SORRY BUT THIS IS ALL I COULD THINK ABOUT WHEN THEY TALKED ABOUT KEEPING THE BEANS COOL
“You’re like super nice to me 😀” “…not really. I’m just doing the bare minimum here.” “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.” “Oh, that’s sad!” — 😂😅🤣
“Okay, Richie, be honest… Am I reading as ghost or Lin Manuel Miranda” — OH FUCKING GOD IM CACKLING
“You kinda look like that homeless guy from downtown” 💀 FOURTH WALL BREAK?!?
Max must be VERY drunk because ain’t no way he thought Pete was a ghost or Ruth was actually a skeleton 💀
“Grace, we gotta abort the plan, it’s not working!” “It’s working for me, he’s so violent! 😍”
Not Max actually being touched by them putting this whole thing together for him 💀 very much giving off himbo vibes and I love him for that
MAX FELL THREE STOREYS
Oh my GOD THE FUCKING MAKE UP ON MAX FOR HIS DEATH SCENE HOLY SHIT
“NERDY! PRUDES! MUST! DIE!” — oh hey it’s the name of the show! 😃 And also it was written on the wall in… oh 😳
“I did get a lot of incriminating footage of us luring him here with malicious intent!” - uh oh
“My god! We’re going to jail! And with my luck, no one will even bother making me their bitch!” — PLEASE 💀
“It wasn’t murder, and it wasn’t an accident… it was an act of God! 😇” - Grace is UNHINGED
“No more tickling in our mommy spots!” - OUR WHAT SPOTS?!?
“🎵🤌🏻 We’re gonna bury the body! 🤌🏻🎵”
“Oh no she’s snapping again”
“I just cut off his nips 😌” - again with the nips?!?
DAN AND DONNA 😃😃😃
“Two weeks of heartache” - cut to all of his classmates happy without his influence 💀
STEPH PASSED THE TEST! 😃
“Ya know, this is really your C+.” “Oh Steph… you can keep it. It’d really bring down my GPA.”
Steph asking Pete out to the football game 🥹😁 we love to see it!
GO GO NIGHTHAWKS! 😃🦅 (I know it’s an eagle emoji there’s no hawk emoji 🙈)
“N, I-G, H-T… *squawk squawk* Ks!” 👏🏻🙌🏻
Richie is the team mascot and they wanted/needed him in the huddle 🥹
They apologised for bullying him 😭👏🏻
“And we’d like to apologise in advance for if Max ever comes back, ‘cause we’ll probably go right back to doing it”
“Fuck Clivesdale! Fuck ‘em straight to hell! Assholes!” — AGREED! 👏🏻
I’m 90% sure Jon actually struggled with taking that mascot top off but it worked well with the scene so 😌
“I love being alive! 😃” — oh he’s so about to fucking die, isn’t he?
IT’S MAX CALLING FOR RICHIE HES BACK FROM THE DEAD
MAX’S COSTUME/MAKE UP IS AMAZING OH MY GOD 😌💅🏻
“Should’ve joined the smoke club you nerdy prude” — ANOTHER SMOKE CLUB REFERENCE
Every song on this soundtrack fucking slaps I LOVE IT
There’s not very many men that can pull off being absolutely absolutely fucking terrifying while dancing and singing across the stage but Will Branner managed it so kudos to him
The bit where Richie was repeating what Max said (“who will pray for me? When I’m gone?”) was INSANELY GOOD
“What did they find? You don’t say…you don’t say!” “What’d they find, dad?” “They didn’t say” - 💀
“Oh heck… I’m so hecking fudged”
“*relieved* Oh well we don’t know anything about that one!” “Or ANY one!”
“Maybe it’s a coincidence. People tell me to die every day!” — Okay why is Ruth kind of me 😭
THE FUCKING CAMEOS IN “HATCHET TOWN” ASDFGHJKL?!?! ZIGGY?! MAN IN A HURRY?!? GERALD MONROE?!?
“Ohhh I remember before the lockdown” - yeah me too 😅
THE BARBECUE MONOLOGUES GOT ME HOLLERING 💀
Ruth walking onto the stage and into the spotlight 🥺 literally she was me this whole scene omg I relate so hard to most of what she said ASDFGHJKL
Lauren ATE that song up by the way
MAX KILLED HER BY WEDGIE-ING HER IN TWO AND THEN PUT THE PANTS OVER HER HEAD WHAT THE FUCK MAX 😭
Him telling her to “project” so those in the back row could hear her triggered me so bad as an actor omg 😳
Grace really accusing the entirety of Clivesdale 💀
As soon as the WWJD bracelet was brought up I KNEW what was going on 😭
“Who’s plan was it, Grace?” “It was God’s plan! And now he’s leaving me out to dry! Do something, you son of a bitch!” 💀😅🤣
Grace has lost her fucking SHIT and I fully support that for her
“Show Me Your Hands” musical refrain?!
BEANIES?!? PAUL AND EMMA?!? 😭😭😭 ITS FUCKING PAUL AND EMMA I CANNOT-
“Cup of roasted coffee” refrain too?!?
PAUL GAVE EMMA HIS NUMBER 😭❤️
PAUL + EMMA IN EVERY SINGLE TIMELINE, EVERY SINGLE UNIVERSE-
“EXCUSE ME I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR WHAT FEELS LIKE FIVE FUCKING YEARS AND I STILL HAVE NOT RECIEVED MY GODDAMN HOT CHOCOLATE” 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀😂😂😂😂😂 I FUCKKING CANT IM DONE
🎵”Don’t need a lover boy need a lover man / sure I’m a sapiosexual and you’re intellectual but I’ll cut my lover losses when I can” 🎵 — this song goes so hard omg
Grace pushing between them and shouting “leave room for Jesus!” 💀
“Do we need to get ahold of Ruth?” “Good luck getting ahold of her. Does your phone pls cover calls to hell?” “…Hell?” “She’s bisexual and dead, where else would she be?!?” — 💀
Grace whipping out the gun and telling Steph to cool her beans was so iconic of her
“(Canadian accent) ‘Cause if I’m going down, you hosers comin’ with me, eh” — OH MY FUCKING GOD
Doesn’t shock me a cop would arrest Paul for zero fucking reason, fuck the police 💀
“All I wanted was to be a regular girl with no sexual desire until she was safely married 😭” the FUCK-
“Don’t comfort her, she’s fuckin’ weird” 💀
“I don’t give a shit who you kill - but you just had to go and do it in that house, didn’t you?” — Mayor Lauter really said “murder is fine but NOT in that specific house, you fucking idiots”
THE LORDS IN BLACK?!? 😃 WIGGLY AND BLINKY AND POKEY AND NIBBLY AND TINKY?!?!? FUCK YEAAAAHH
“She gave me head in her car - check it out!” *throws Miss Tessburger’s head onstage* — BRO THE FUCK
WELP I GUESS MAYOR LAUTER IS DEAD THEN?!?
“Detective Shapiro, are you a woman of faith?” “Catholic.” “I’ll take that as a no” — THE FUCK GRACE 😑
They’re really about to summon five otherworldly entities who are evil I’m-
The Summoning screams CRACK and I’m living for it
“Hello Fwendy-Wends” - SCREAMING LITERALLY FUCKING SCREAMING
“WE DON’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR PHONE” TOOK ME OUT ASDFGHJKL
SHE CHERISHES PETE 😭
“Pay the price or fuck off” 💀
Can I just say that I need would love a show specifically just about the Lords in Black fucking about and it’s Jon the whole time as Wiggly exactly as he was during the Summoning scene because that was AMAZING IM SHAKING-
The fact Pete cherishes Steph and she cherishes him oh my hEART 😭
“Hey Steph, if things were different, would you wanna come to homecoming with me?” “I’d like that, Pete. I’d really like that.” - SHUT THE FUCK UP NO 😭😭😭
Not Max saving Pete from being shot 💀
“So you do know the Bible!” — GRACE OMG IM SCREECHING HELP
“But Jesus never threw a football like you, Max” - WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING
Max being confused about what dirty girl soup is and then being turned on when she explains 😭💀
“Take me, Max, right here on the 50 yard line!” — oh dear gOD
Max’s struggle over whether to kill Steph and Pete or whether to bang Grace omfg 😭😅
THE NOISES OFF STAGE OMFG WTAF 😭💀😂😅🤣
Grace got Max kicking his feet, twirling his hair, after one shag, just like a teenage girl 💀 I’m crying so hard with laughter I can’t cope with it-
GRACE GAVE HIM HER CHASTITY AND SACRIFICED WHAT SHE CHERISHED MOST ASDFGHJKL
PETE AND STEPHANIE AT HOMECOMING TOGETHER ASDFGHJKL ✨T H E M ✨
Grace choosing not to get the dance cancelled and she brought a date?!? That’s character development! 😀
She let Jason walk her home?!? O_o and then asked him to kiss her?!?!
“That was… absolutely disgusting! Really, Jason?!? Kissing on the first date?!?” Oh noooo 💀
“You’re a dirty perv, Jason”
SHES GOT THE FUCKING BLACK BOOK IS SHE SUMMONING THEM AGAIN
🎵DIRTY DUDES MUST DIE🎵
Well thIS TOOK A FUCKING TURN DAMN
Anyway, 11/10, immaculate, amazing, incredible, show-stopping, would recommend to everyone of course and will definitely be rewatching it a LOT 🪓
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[ TWISTED | ACT 2 — SENTENCE STARTER ]
A sentence starter with quotes taken from the Starkid musical: “Twisted”. Change pronouns/titles when necessary to fit your needs.
“Oh, you received the manhood of a tiger.”
“All hail [Name], the tiger fucker.”
“And now, now he can’t come with me to cowboy camp!”
“Usually, when you do that it means you want to talk.”
“I would hardly call him a boy. He was well into his thirties.”
“It’s like he was designed specifically to appeal to me.”
“I want to expect the unexpected.”
“So I think it would solve all of the kingdom’s problems if we just made everyone a princess!”
“And when the moment is right, they whip it out… You know, their songs.”
“A song is often a prelude to a dick.”
[Gasp] [Checks name written in hand] “[NAME]!!”
“Because it is you. You’re just wearing different clothes.”
“Everything about you that was attractive to me before isn’t really there anymore.”
“I mean, it’s not like he’s singing or anything.”
“Can’t you see I’m in the middle of a mind blowing conversation with this furry man?”
“He was just pretending to be a wanted criminal… For FUN.”
“Why would I pretend to be a prince? Just to get laid?”
“See? You fucking knew that, you sorcerer!”
“It will look as if something magical has happened, but it’s simply a chemical reaction, not sorcery.”
“Didn’t my tiger eat your ass?”
“You who can command the very stars and the moon!”
“And I am not charmed by your crazy bullshit now.”
“I’m not going to take off my clothes in the middle of a battle!”
“Would you stop acting like an asshole for one minute?”
“Not that kind of love, you shit for brains!”
“Ok, Jesus Christ, I don’t know what’s going on here–”
“You just really have to believe your own bullshit!”
“It was more money that I’d ever seen. But I was able to count it.”
“From now on, everyone is a princess.”
“Captain? Don’t you mean princess?”
“Phenomenal cosmic powers… Shitty, shitty, living space.”
“You’re forgetting the best part, when the two lovers are reunited and they live happily ever after.”
“I always said a thousand and one nights wasn’t enough!”
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