today i had a really bad flare at school and i was literally crying and shaking in class from the amount of pain i was in and my mom wouldn't pick up the phone and it was just awful
it's the end of the day now and i've gotten some rest and i'm feeling a bit better but i can't shake the feeling of shame because i wasn't able to control my reaction to the pain while in a public space and ugh. i know i shouldn't feel ashamed and i was literally at like a 9/10 on the pain scale but god. it truly does feel horrible to be in a room full of people and not be able to control yourself in the slightest despite your best attempts
i hate all of this so much
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Working a tiny bit on my own story and this image popped in my head so I had to draw it. Moral of my story is people are not owed forgiveness and be yourself(gay and trans).
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Sooooo I’m gonna start using a different name on here besides Elliot. Part of this is some name exploration because Elliot is just adding to letters to my given nickname. Another part is because if I do keep the name in the end, I’m going to legally change it then so I’d rather it not be tied to my gay little blog. Idk what other names I'll be using yet but will likely change it this week.
The name Sketch is here to stay, but I want to try out some other names on here cuz I will never change my name to Sketch legally for several reasons lol
Anyways. Stay tuned!
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next week on l&o: olivia and elliot each go rogue to chase down their respective sisyphean hauntings
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Funny pets things of the last few days:
- Bean was supposed to stay home for a errand, but when I opened the door to go out with Elliot, she ran full speed to the car. Tail wagging, staring at the door. She came with us 😂
- Elliot firmly believes that he can catch ANY bird (he never does) including flying birds that are 100+ feet up. He will inevitably jump and run after them.
- Elliot has discovered that he can jump on cat tree. He will only be stopped if the tree is surrounded by barriers.
- I looked on my phone for a few seconds. I look back up, Elliot is 3/4 of the way into a wild creature's hole house thingy. He doesn't understand that he is not, in fact, a terrier.
- We put Nelly on the other side of the house where the dogs can't go. Of her own decision, she went back to where the dogs are and was VERY shocked to discovered that they were still there. The audacity.
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So I was thinking about what genres of music Lockwood and Co. would be into and a thought occured to me - do The Beatles exist in their world?
No cause think about it, it’s esenchally a divergent timeline from our own where The Problem happened and this had some radical effects on things like the UK’s economy and things like child labour laws. Their version of the governement got rid of captital punishment because it was making ghosts instead of why they did it in real life. And I was talking to my parents, who were students in London for years, about the books and they thought it was strange that most of the characters are actually from London, that genrally London is full of people from other places who have moved there, so it’s odd that at least one of them isn’t from Scotland or France or something. But then London is a massive hot spot for ghosts and the UK’s economy isn’t great so in that timeline there would be way less people moving to London for work from other places.
All of this to say, there are probably loads of other changes too that just don’t come up in the books. So there’s a good chance that musicians from the UK from the last 50 years either just didn’t get big in that timeline or did but the story is different. So it’s entirely possible Lockwood and Co. have never heard of the Beatles. And now I’m just wondering about a Beatles AU where at least one or two of them have Talent and become agents instead of musicians.
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So I watched little shop of horrors recently for the first time since I was like A Teen and realized that Seymour and Audrey are like...... the most T4T a theoretically-cis couple can possible be. Their outfits and their mannerisms and their VOICES, and the choices they make and the things they want are like. SUCH SPECIFIC TRANS ENERGY. like insecure low-income shitty-environment trans people. Like I KNOW that goofy little trans guy with his three-sizes-too-big short sleeve button-downs and his Smallness and his silly little baseball cap. I have HEARD that Voice that Audrey is doing, I've seen that Makeup and that Dress and those SHOES!!!!
So the problem is that like. I am now fucking Desperate to see a production of little shop where seymour and audrey are a t4t couple. I feel like it would change the tone, add sincerity in with the irony in a way that would be REALLY COMPELLING AND SEXY!!!! I feel like there's a way that talented actors and singers could play it that would be so caTHARTIC and it would fucking RULE!!!!
But!!!! There are uhhh. 3 problems. With this.
1. Audrey 2 and Mr Mushnik (idk how you spell that) are. At least in the movie. Pretty Fucked Up and Racist and Anti-Semitic I Think. I have no idea how you get around that (or what to do with Audrey II at all, honestly, though I feel like there's def interesting directions you could go with it). I kind of think this is surmountable if you worked with people from the appropriate communities, Maybe.
2. It absolutely has to have the movie ending NOT the show ending and idk if that's, like, Allowed
3. I. I wanna be seymour. I wanna be seymour so bad 😭😭😭😭
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Fallen Angel AU 👀👀?? -el
I gotta say @roideny I already told you everything I have about this au 🤣 But apparently seeing an ask make my brain work (or smt) and boom I now! Have! The Main! Plot! (Still no snippets tho sorry 😕)
Once again quick background:
There are Angels and Fallen Angels, Fallen Angels are ex Angels who had messed up in someways, so they got cast down hell. Both of them got assigned to humans that are having trouble dealing with certain stuff in their life, so the Angel/Fallen Angel can protect and guide the human
Angels got the more lawfully good cases and Fallen Angels got the more chaotic good ones. Not every human got an Angels/Fallen Angels assigned to them but if they do got one it’s usually just one of them, the people who have both are like, on a point of doing things the Right way or the Wrong way (breaking the law and stuff like that)
David is a reporter, His dad Mayer got hurt because of This Bad Guy (details still yet to be planned), but Bad Guy is good at covering their tracks so there aren’t enough evidence to hold up in court. David is trying his best to get those and he’s frustrated at the dead ends, so he’s considering some Not Legal ways to get this thing done
Since David is at a point that’s pretty much in between he got two guardians, Spot is an Angel and Jack is a Fallen Angel, both got assigned to help David, and that’s basically it!
Honorable mention: Race is also a Fallen Angel, he was besties with Spot when he was still an Angel but the two of them fell (ha) out of touch after Race got cast down hell. Jack kinda took Race under his wings (ha again) when they met, and is aware of Spot being Race’s ex bestie
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