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thejustmaiden · 4 years

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Fiction and Real Life Go Hand In Hand

This blog goes out to all those pro-Sessrin fans out there who refuse to acknowledge the very real effects fiction can have on our world and vice versa. I highly encourage other Inuyasha fans who defend/enable these shippers to read this, as well. I assure you, by no means are my intentions here to stir up trouble. Honestly, I just want some good healthy discourse for once if that’s not too much to ask. If you do decide to engage, please be mindful of that and treat others with respect and I will do the same in return. All in all, the goal of this blog is to exercise my right to speak out and be critical about content I believe to have very potentially detrimental repercussions. I ask that you not attack me or insult me simply for stating an opinion. Thank you!

It’s like the title says, meaning fiction does matter. Where do you think we get ideas for all the stories we tell? Where do we draw inspiration from in the first place?

Real life, that's where! And yes, always with a touch of imagination! Long story short: fiction matters because real life does.

Allow me to elaborate.

Shippers of the Sesshomaru x Rin (Sessrin) pairing say it's not fair of us to throw around serious accusations or use certain deragatory terms that suggest such awful acts like child grooming or pedophilia because of the harmful implications. One of their reasonings being that some people IRL have actually lived through these traumas, so we shouldn't dare to assume they're comparable since one is just fiction and the other is not. But this isn’t about which is worse than the other, because they’re both super problematic. All we’re literally doing is making a link between grooming in real life and grooming in fiction. They mirror each other. Same issue; different mediums. We’re not undermining any one’s past experiences with grooming or the like, nor are we prioritizing fiction to diminish real life abuse. They’re both awful in numerous ways and that’s all we’re trying to say. In fact, if anything we’re attempting to demonstrate just how crucial this correlation is between them. In order to protect past victims and prevent future ones, we must remain vigiliant of the content we consume, and yes, sometimes that means we have to challenge it too. Just because it’s widely-viewed does not make it widely-accepted or well-received. It is paramount that we educate ourselves on how to be more critical of some of the harmful tropes and images that are still way too prevalent in mainstream media. Sexualizing young and pre-pubescent girls is way more normalized than some of us even realize. It’s sad but true that Sessrin is just one of many examples. I know it feels like society has failed us in a lot of ways, but it’s never too late to re-evaluate and re-learn better and more improved ways of viewing and processing information presented to us.

Our mission: Let’s not show our kids that grooming or any other form of abuse are acceptable if they may ever come to experience or encounter it themselves. Be it the real world or on screen. Deal?

There have been a number of occasions where real life victims do speak up against the Sessrin ship and express how extremely uncomfortable it makes them feel by what it represents. The problem is that it’s becoming more evident now that many of their fans will dismiss anything purely on the basis that we pose a threat to their ship and nothing more. What it comes down to is they have no real leg to stand on and cannot possibly top any of what we have to say so instead they simply disregard it. Our inconvenient truths don't fit into their ideal *cough* OOC *cough* narrative so they just choose to be willfully ignorant. It conflicts with their fantasy, so rather than present a sound argument of their own, they flat-out reject it and offer no plausible back-up behind their reasoning besides "I don't interpret it that way." GUYS, CHILD GROOMING IS NOT UP FOR INTERPRETATION.

Just because you so desperately want your ship to come true does not mean you can up and decide to redefine a word so that it caters to your stance. Remind yourself that these are complex AND objective terms that we have no right to fiddle with to serve our own selfish purposes. This is why we can conclude that there's no debate about Sesshomaru's actions towards Rin embodying child grooming.

I apologize if any of my words are triggering by the way, so please feel free to take a break and return later if that’s more suitable for you. it's just really important that everyone in this fandom comprehends the extent in which Sessrin going canon is catastrophic. And no, I'm not exaggerating; I'm simply speaking the truth. Shippers justifying these horrible acts- yes, even in fiction- is usually due to the stubborn refusal to hear us out. No offense to anyone (just stating facts), but more times than not antis like myself feel as if we’re talking to a brick wall when we interact with Sessrin peeps. They go in circles and never expand on their perspectives.

Just a head’s up: THIS GETS LONG. Stick with me. :p

Just look at their take on the Inukag vs. Sessrin relationships for example. This isn't a question of age gaps, this is a question of physical/emotional compatibility. Inukag are the same age mentally wise regardless of one being demon and the other not, whereas Sessrin is not and never will be, and yes, even once she's an adult. The thing is we have debunked this time and time again, because they’re not the same and therefore not comparable, but for some reason these fans won’t drop it. Nothing has changed in their argument, yet they’re persistent in bringing it up. I choose to not go into more detail, since like I said, you can find it around everywhere. I just wanted to touch upon it briefly to prove a point. Maybe it will come up again later in my blog though!

Where was I earlier? Right, child grooming! Haven't you guys realized that what you’re doing is precisely what child groomers do to make excuses or deny any grooming took place at all? (FYI: I’m not accusing you of being child groomers yourselves.) “They reciprocated so the feelings are mutual" is a typical groomer response, but of course it varies. More often than not, victims of grooming aren't even aware they've been groomed until much later. That's how manipulative groomers are that they can legitmately convince you that maybe you're wrong in questioning their motives. Perhaps in the victim’s mind that because one huge indicator of grooming never actually took place it technically cannot constitute as grooming. They start to doubt themselves even though their intuition is telling them something’s off. They should just ignore it then since it can’t possibly be grooming if that one particular thing never happened, right? Wrong, grooming isn’t strictly this or strictly that. It's much more complicated and multi-faceted. This is why the “but Sesshomaru left Rin in the village” point upsets me greatly. HE WAS STILL INVOLVED IN HER LIFE, Y’ALL.

On top of that, are you aware that this is the exact same kind of predatory mindset pedophiles use to describe their infatuation with children? They'll say things like, "I don't see them as an adult and a child. I see them as two people with a soul connection." Okay no joke, I wish I was lying, but that is literally a point one pro-sessrin fan on here recently used to defend this ship. It both astounds me and terrifies me that they don't see the glaring similarities they share in common with actual pedos.

Alright, I want to quickly return to what I was saying earlier about fiction's impact on real life. (Sorry, I’m a bit of a scatterbrain!)

The characters and their worlds in our stories that we dream up and bring to life are nothing short of awe-inspiring and magnificent if we so choose them to be. If it wasn't for our imaginations, stories like Inuyasha would have never come to exist. Fiction provides us an amazing outlet where we are given the opportunity to express ourselves and explore its infinite creative possibilities.

But strip away all the demons and magical components of this show we all love so dearly and what are we left with?

At the very core, Inuyasha is a story that's very reminiscent of the human experience: love, camaraderie, a sense of purpose, and much more!

So perhaps we got a full-fledged dog demon like Sesshomaru, but does that necessarily mean we can't relate to him or understand him simply because dog demons don't exist in the real world? Well, I hope that's not how you view it or else you're missing the whole point of why humans create stories to begin with. We create them to make better sense of and thus connect with the world we live in. And when you really think about it, our stories are just a celebration of life- both our struggles and our triumphs. Now I'm no philosophy professor, but I'm pretty sure they'd say I hit that nail right smack on the head. ;)

All shitty jokes aside, the whole reason I’m mentioning this specific example in the first place is because this recently came up with another Sessrin supporter. That supporter tried to defend the ship by stating that we aren't allowed to use Sesshomaru as an example to judge by since his kind don't exist in the real world.

Now if it isn't evident already, this "it's just fiction" argument is a popular go-to stance many Sessrin fans will resort to once they've run out of ideas and are metaphorically backed into a corner. The funny/sad thing is that they seem to sincerely believe this is strong enough evidence to defend their ship with, but per usual, they fail to see how hypocritical that would be. I’ll clarify soon down below.

Seriously, since when did we decide that fantasy- or any story genre for that matter- stopped reflecting the real world we live in? I mean, we humans are the ones writing these stories. Our human influence is bound to make an impact in some capacity. In fact, we want it to!

Obviously none of us have ever met a dog demon like Sesshomaru, because how could we? Let me tell ya, this is gaslighting at its finest! This is a fictional story with fantasy elements, so of course there will be beings and creatures in their world that don't exist in our own. Does that somehow translate to the fact that nothing from the story of Inuyasha can be applied to our own personal stories or that there aren't meaningful messages to be taught and learned?

So on the flipside, if they're not screaming at us "it's just fiction" for the hundred billionth time, then they are, believe it or not, doing the reverse and comparing it to real world history. One instance of this is how they tell us we're making a big deal about something that isn't real, but go right ahead and use the history of feudal Japan to support Sesshomaru's decision to court (aka GROOM) a young girl because that's how it was done back then. And so, your point being?? It wasn't right then just because it was legal, and it's most certainly not right now. This is how all of their arguments go by the way, where you'll constantly witness a cherry-picking approach. It's agonizing to endure contradiction after contradiction in their arguments filled with nothing but holes in their logic.

I'd just like to add that if we're overreacting to this fictional ship like they love to say we are then technically so are they. They tell us things like "grow up" or "nobody is telling you to keep watching," yet fail to realize they're reacting just as fervently as we are but just on the opposing side of the same damn argument. I find it interesting how they're as invested in this show but pretend they aren't then STILL have the audacity to say it's only us who care this much!? So thank you Sessrin shippers for further proving our point that fiction is more than capable of affecting reality and the people- YES, US- who reside in it.

It's insane that people act like pedophiles and other creeps don't enjoy entertainment too like the rest of us. Believe it or not, they look just like you and me most of the time. Yes, that means they can easily pass as a “regular guy” if they so wished to. My question to you is how do you think pedophiles will take it when they discover others- underage fans more specifically- who dig the same kinda media they get off to? Maybe not in the exact same way, mind you, but there's a thin line between them when you really think about it. I mean, what other explanation is there for why literal pedos on the internet have been known to sneak into pro-sessrin group chats here on Tumblr before? (Thankfully, they were later kicked.) I know that for a fact! It's almost as if the universe is trying to tell them something they refuse to listen to elsewhere. Hhmmm I wonder what that may be.

I imagine it’s possibly one of the hardest things to admit out loud and to themselves, but I can almost guarantee you that most of these Sessrin shippers who are victims of CSA and who still see no issue with Sessrin must be living with some sort of unresolved trauma caused by the very abuse they claimed to have undergone. It's been proven that victims who do not seek or properly receive the help and treatment they need in order to address and live with a traumatic experience such as this are more likely to perpetuate that very same abuse themselves in some way, shape or form. What if in this case fiction is enough for them, but who's to say it won’t eventually manifest itself in other more dire and far-reaching ways? It's not like we haven't seen this vicious cycle before, and I can promise you that Sessrin won't be the last. LET'S STOP NORMALIZING & GLORIFYING THE ROMANTIZATION & SEXUALIZATION OF CHILDREN. Fictional example: Usagi Drop. Need I say more? Real world example: Woody Allen. Again, need I say more?

Bottom line is that Sessrin shippers don't want us to think too critically about this ship of theirs, because if we dig too deep then they're forced to face the very troubling implications this pairing really stands for. Of course they'll never admit to them, because instead they rather double down and grasp at the same old straws as long as it means their precious ship is protected at all costs. Screw everyone else if that's what it takes, because they'll threaten to burn down legit buildings in real life if that ensures Sessrin goes canon! (True story, this happened on Twitter.) They’ll taunt and bully anyone who disagrees. Even if all you literally say is that you don’t like the ship, they’ll gang up on you. Tell them about your past experience with being groomed? They’ll laugh in your face. I wish I was kidding, but I assure you I am not. And they say we're ridiculous and taking this way too seriously? Yeah...

The typical behavior of a Sessrin shipper demonstrates an overly aggressive front since they're usually on defense mode anyway. They only want to ship their sick ship in peace in other words. But just because neo-nazis have a right to spew their bigoted ideology, doesn't mean we don't got the right to punch them! Freedom of speech doesn't equate to freedom from consequences. And Sessrin shippers wonder why they got so many haters. Just sayin'.

Their presence on other platforms like Twitter and Reddit are some examples of how delusional and unstable some Sessrin fans are capable of becoming. Even recently, an anon here on Tumblr sent Richard Ian Cox (English VA for Inuyasha) a totally uncalled for ask telling him that "sessrin is love and there's nothing he can do about it." (That's not verbatim, but if you're interested I'll link you to it.) It appears they discovered that he didn't like Sessrin based on how he had been replying to asks, and just for that reason alone they thought they had the right to harass him. For simply stating his opinion, y'all. They didn't even have the decency to show their face either. Talk about immature and cowardly!

Just yesterday (or was it the day before?) a fanatic Sessrin user on Tumblr- who’s also been known for hateful remarks on Twitter but those tweets have of course been deleted since then- went out of their way to not only lurk in a group chat they don’t belong to on here but to then proceed to harass a few of us in there. They had the guts to take screenshots from that group chat, tag us in posts on their page regarding what they read in there, and without our knowledge or permission went ahead and actually blogged them?? I mean, who calls out people behind their backs while they're just minding their own business?? It worries me how unhinged and out of touch with reality some Sessriners are. Not all of them, but a whole lot of them.

It seems all they are doing is looking for trouble, as they just can't stand how much we hate this ship. So it's more than okay if they love on their ship but it's not okay if we don't and we should just keep our mouths shut. But since when do Sessrin fans have authority over our opinions? Even if they were officially canon, nothing is ever gonna change our opinion. Now when they actually do decide to participate in discourse with antis, you'll see them fishing for excuses to bow out. How they normally go about this is by fabricating a way to blame us antis for their exiting a conversation as if we're being the irrational ones here.

There’s no denying that some antis can also be overly blunt or aggressive (nobody is saying we’re perfect here), but speaking for myself, I know I would never make such nasty comments about other fans and their personal lives. And honestly? It would make me feel like shit talking bad about someone I don't actually know. Nah, I won't stoop to that level or give haters that satisfaction. I may not attack them as people, but that doesn't mean I can't attack some of their messed up ideas that threaten to distort how we should or shouldn’t perceive certain dangerous situations and events. Seeing as how for me this is more than just a matter of opinion- it's a moral responsibility and even an obligation.

I know it's difficult to remain civil when things get heated and people start taking things personally- yet more proof that fiction impacts our lives- but that's the only way any of us will ever have constructive discussions about serious topics like this. Unfortunately, Sessrin shippers, from what I can tell, are incapable of engaging in real discourse for the most part. They may be vocal but that doesn't mean they can pack a punch. I’d really love to be proven wrong someday.

Okay, moving on! If they're not involved in some big-time gaslighting then they're using their infamous strawman argument approach.

Sessrin fans’ sole purpose isn't really to defend their ship, per se, but rather to deflect and antagonize. They like to mislead in order to shift the focus/blame onto their opponent or something else that's not related so that they can stray from the main point.

Take the drama CD for example. It's officially NOT considered canon, right? But that hasn't stopped many fans from referencing it anyway so let’s too consider it for a moment. The point is that they use its "existence" whenever convenient then deny it or downplay it whenever it’s not. So on one hand, it's plain as day that they celebrate it as proof of a romantic future for Sessrin. But then later once we point out to them that Sesshomaru is essentially confessing to Rin that he will wait for her until she's of age, they'll brush it off and quickly add that they didn't interpret the scene that way and leave it at that. I mean how else would you interpret it? And if it's not a proposal of sorts then why exactly are you bouncing off the walls about it to begin with?? If that's all it means is nothing then why are we even talking about this?! You see what I mean here??! And somehow we're the crazy ones?

Let me to be frank with you. If you haven’t listened to it already, this proposal he offered her sounded like a declaration of love in a multitude of ways, which is wildly inappropriate since Rin was only 12 at the time. Signifying that Sesshomaru was/is indeed grooming her. Well, that is if you choose to recognize the drama CD. Nevertheless, whether you do or not, I personally hate that this non-canon satire is even associated with the Inuyasha name to begin with. Ugh.

Intentional or not, Sesshomaru made a deliberate decision in that moment to tell a little girl- and not just any little girl mind you but a girl he's taken in under his care for a good year- that he would wait for her if she so chooses once she's old enough.

The issue is that it isn’t only age of consent we’re concerned about regarding this pairing. What Sessriners fail to see is that this grown male authority- her vassal, her guardian, her adoptive father, or whatever you wanna refer to him as- is basically making a move on this girl he had in his company for quite some time. There's no sugarcoating that. Us antis call it how it is, and I'm sure as fucking day other people who don't watch the show would most certainly agree that the Sesshomaru/Rin bond is filial. Set aside those rose-tinted glasses of yours, and going by everything we’ve been delivered in the manga and parts of the anime (and NOT the drama cd), there are literally no hints that indicate a blossoming romance between this adult male demon and this small human girl he’s taken under his wing. You can imagine them all you want if it pleases you, but that doesn’t mean they’re there. Adult!Rin is a figment of your imagination, nothing more. The idolization of this pairing is pretty disturbing seeing as all we have to go off of in canon is Child!Rin. There have only ever been sweet and innocent moments passed between the two, which is why I’m positive that an unbiased viewer or an outsider would state their dynamic resembled something akin to a father-daugther relationship. I would bet a shit ton of money on that, believe you me!

Rin's inhibitions are low because children are naturally naive and don't know any better. Remember, she adores and trust this man with all her heart, so why would she think any of this so-called grooming is not normal behavior. (I only say “so-called grooming” because I don’t think Sesshomaru bringing her gifts in the village has to be a romantic thing.) Or how would she ever be able to understand that she’s being taken advantage of if she has no previous experience with it? Maybe if she was present for that time Inuyasha and the gang scolded Miroku when they had learned that years previous he had supposedly proposed to this young girl in the village they were visiting, then Rin would. And he didn’t even assist in helping raise her but look at how they reacted! How is this any different than Sesshomaru hooking up with Rin later? It’s actually worse in Sessrin's case. Do you honestly believe that Inuyasha and the others would take kindly to this?

It's not uncommon and considered harmless for young children to have crushes on adults, after all, but the adults in these scenarios should never resort to using and abusing the position of power they held or continue to hold over this child for any reason whatsoever.

What I'm trying to get across here is that no matter how you spin it, Sessrin can NEVER be deemed a morally acceptable pairing. Like ship what you want, we're not saying you can't ship Sessrin. What we're saying is this:

STOP referring to their bond as "pure" and not expect backlash for your grossly inaccurate statements. Just admit it's toxic, because it's extremely harmful to many viewers- and not just victims- to pretend and suggest otherwise.

Please remind yourself of the very real canon fact that Rin traveled with Sesshomaru and they established a bond all while she was just a girl. Oh, and he saved her life too many times to count, not to mention brought her back from the dead TWICE. This is why I don't care much for your counter argument "that dynamics can change over time," because although that's true, like with everything in life there must be standards we adhere to. Exceptions to rules, if you will. Our own basic morals demand it.

For instance, it’s normal that some childhood friends begin to like each other as more than friends years down the road. Nothing wrong with that, because that's a natural and healthy occurrence. Now you cannot apply this to an adult and a child for obvious reasons, but what you also cannot do is apply this to an adult who met and knew another adult while they were still just a child. Why? Well, because it'd be like betraying and perverting that former child's view of you. They were never your equal because your established dynamic resembles that of one an adult posesses with a child even once they've grown up. Think about it this way: it's in the same bracket of family members or family friends who've watched you grow up and mature into an adult. Then later just because they're all grown up, does that mean that those children "are not off bounds" - that's quoting a Sessrin shipper by the way- to these certain family members and family friends?

If you're still struggling to grasp this, I urge you to take a moment (or all the time you need!) to really put yourself in that child's shoes and self-reflect. Would you truly be alright with a family friend you haven't seen in years (but sorely missed because they used to occasionally babysit you) just someday coming back into your life and then very inappropriately flirting with you or even making sexual advances on you? (Sorry for the run-on!) Or even worse, can you picture this happening to one of your own children??! Seriously, ask yourself that and sit with that for a while and really take it all in. It’s not fun, I know, but if that’s what it takes to help you finally understand then please try and practice more ways to utilize your self-awareness in the future. It’s for everyone’s benefit, not only yours, I promise! You'll also find it makes it tremendously easier to empathize with others.

I got news for those fans who don’t view Sesshomaru as a father figure to Rin. The title we give him doesn’t hold as much weight as a lot of us are making it out to be. Let’s try to be neutral here and stick to the hard facts, shall we?

*Sesshomaru is an adult male authority whose protection Rin is under*

*It’s safe to assume that Rin has grown attached to him and maybe even looks up to him*

*They care about each other and the other's well-being*

*He has has played a crucial part in her supervision and care for a significant period of time (yes, even if it’s just passing a message along to Jaken)*

Not so random anecdote: In an Inuyasha episode I recently revisited, Sesshomaru had just rescued Rin from Kohaku who had been possessed by Naraku and was ordered to kill Rin. Anyway, at the end of their scene you can hear Jaken ask out loud, “what should we do for dinner, Lord Sesshomaru?” And that’s about the most domestic thing I’ve ever heard come out of his mouth. They’re such a family dammit and nothing will ever change that!! <3

This is precisely why I could never in a million years view those past students of mine in a romantic light. I don't care how many years have passed, it's just not possible for me. Just the idea of pursuing a romantic and/or sexual relationship absolutely repels me.

Speaking as a former teacher, you don't need to be a parental figure who's around all the time in order to have great love and affection for a child. I would've done absolutely anything in my power to protect them even though they weren't my own. Then again, I did consider them my children in a way even if wasn't in a familial sense. Does that make my love for them any less unique? No, it's just different but not inferior. When you stop to think about, it really doesn't take as long as you may think to establish rapport with a person, particularly children. Connecting with a child is almost instant (but of course some are more receptive than others), and once you do make that special connection one can only make with a child, a strong and overwhelming need to guide and protect them kicks in almost automatically. The unconditional love an adult feels for a child is powerful and constant, and nothing should ever change that. As much as some of you really want to believe otherwise, that feeling doesn’t just go away because they turned 18. In your eyes, they’ll always be that kid.

I get it, sometimes when we escape into these fictional worlds of ours, it's difficult not to project our own wishes and desires onto certain characters. I don't blame fans for picturing themselves with Sesshomaru- I know I did haha- but never once did I self-insert myself as Rin. I know she's one of the biggest catalysts for his character growth- if not THE biggest- but how and why does that need to turn romantic? There are other antis who I have spoken with on this. They informed me that they used to live vicariously through Rin and ship them together, as well. As they got older, they later learned how weird and twisted this ship actually was. That's what's supposed to happen, y'all, you're supposed to grow out of that fixation.

Now take your mind out of the Inuyasha universe for a second and hypothetically (or not hypothetically if you have kids) answer me this: if and/or when you ever have a child, would you genuinely be comfortable with the idea of them dating and eventually marrying their father’s best friend who was also there to witness them grow up? Be honest please.

I highly doubt you would want that- or at least I hope not. You see, that's another MAJOR point I've made a few times already and yet you Sessrin shippers continue to avoid the question. It's pretty obvious it hasn't been rhetorical either. Ignorance is bliss?

Finally, I’d like to address one more point. It seems there is a HUGE misconception and I'd like to clear it up real quick. That is Sessrin shippers misinterpret one of the issues we have with this ship. They chalk up our complaints of Sessrin being canon (which is a LIE, nothing has been confirmed yet) to us just being salty because that somehow means our ships aren't or won’t be. I assure you, readers, other antis and I will attest that this ain't about dumb shipping wars, this is so much bigger than that!!!

I noticed recently that some Sessrin fans have even begun calling us Karens lolol like if anybody is a Karen it's them! This ain't about some mere difference in taste, this is very likely to have LONG-LASTING NEGATIVE EFFECTS. Sessrin going canon is a very harmful message to send viewers and children/teens especially. So if anything, it’s these shippers who are being the entitled ones here thinking that the fact we don’t support their ship is the worst thing in the world. NO, THE REAL PROBLEM IS CHILD GROOMING. GET OVER YOURSELF.

Out of nowhere, some of them even started assuming all us antis were white, which in their books is also equivalent to Karens or even white supremacists somehow?? Those aren't one in the same, but it's easy to make it appear that way when the US is currently tackling major systems of oppression and racial injustice. Because to them, all antis must be from over here. (Yes, I'm American. But no, I'm not white.) How else can anyone explain not shipping Sessrin, right?! Somehow they have it in their heads that ALL of Japan and surrounding places are super approving of this ship, and that everyone else isn’t because of their upbringing and “Western way of thinking.”

To give you an idea of what I mean, look back at what I talked about earlier with their incessant mention of Sessrin vs. Inukag. Because THIS is another popular example of how these shippers present their side and then ignore all the facts. Many fans have already proven how fucked up and inaccurate it is to label whole countries and cultures. It’s like they simply think mentioning it makes it count even though we’ve discredited their points over and over. Nah, you got to back it up with good reasons that support your side of the argument. That’s How To Have An Argument: 101. So at the end of the day, all they're actually achieving in doing is making dumb and entirely unrelated accusations based on nothing just to lead to deductions that are equally unfounded. Nothing at all is accomplished but more gaslighting and hurling of insults on their part = a complete waste of time for antis = an excuse for them to peace out early from the conversation & that’s what they wanted all along

We’ve reached the end (finally! sorry for all the rambling!), and I hope those of you who stayed till the end or read enough can take something positive out of this. As many Inuyasha fans are aware, there will be a livestream with the VAs for Sesshomaru and Rin coming out within the next few hours. We don’t have all the details yet, and afterwards we probably still won’t. I’m not just talking about Sessrin here but about the sequel in general. Whatever happens, please just remember to be kind to one another. If you don’t think you’re capable of doing that, then it’s best you vent and fume elsewhere. Easier said than done, I know, but just try. Throughout this blog, I admit there were moments where I got frustrated and took some jabs at Sessrin shippers. Please believe me when I say that I do not and would not ever wish any of you ill will.

Inuyasha was such a huge part of my childhood, and I’m not gonna lie, I’m anxious as hell that Sunrise will ruin one of the best things I loved about this show. So pardon me if my reactions are too visceral for your liking. haha Also, like the movies and the drama cd, this sequel is not in fact canon. Therefore, for those of you who disagree or who still plan to enjoy this new series, respect the fact that some of us fans will definitely “cancel” it if we feel that’s what we have to do to come to terms with it and move on. Fans have that right, after all. Why should we get on board with something if it’s so uncharacteristic of and unrecognizable from the original source material? If all this is some sort of cash grab of Sunrise’s doing, then count me out. I truly hope that this sequel turn outs being a lot more promising than a lot of us are expecting. I’m begging you, Sunrise, I wanna believe you’re better than this. Please and thank you!

By the way, if you’re interested, feel free to check out my two other blogs on this same subject. Click here and here. The last two screenshots do not come from something I’ve written myself. If you’d like to read more from where those came from, let me know and I’d be more than happy to send you the links. Okay, bye for now. Peace out and stay safe, everyone!

#inuyasha #hanyo no yashahime #anti sessrin #sesshomaru #rin

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bloody-wonder · 4 years

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Why do you like aftg series so much?

bcs i like how distinct and well-rounded the characters are, how unique their dynamics are, how they are a found family but not quite, how wymack is The Dad, how each of the characters has a different tragic backstory, how there are no cheap redemption arcs and instead every character gets to shine in their morally grey glory, how the relationships are developed and not stated as fact, how the story allows for so many different interpretations of the characters

bcs i like the plot and how edgy and unrealistic and dramatic it is and how it’s a perfect vessel for this character driven story and how the triumph over the bad guys at the end feels earned

bcs i like exy both in terms of how it looks and how it structures the story and supports some of the character arcs

bcs i like the straightforward writing that is sprinkled with over the top dramatic quotes, how much dialogue there is, how many lines are perfect one-liners, how the story doesn’t shy away from the darkest aspects and combines both angst and humor, how the feel good moments really feel good and not like cheesy platitudes bcs the narrative makes the characters earn them

bcs i like how it comments on the themes of social deviance and acceptance, of different forms of love and friendship and family, of respect and understanding being the prerequisite for trust, of how you sometimes need bad coping mechanisms to survive before you find some good ones, of how trauma changes you and how non-linear the healing process is and how there’s always hope that there’s someone out there who will understand you and accept you and love you as you are with no conditions and reservations

bcs i like andreil and how it’s a romance but not quite, how it omits many cliche elements of a fictional romance and instead invents something new and fresh and unique to these characters, how it depicts what it’s like being on the ace spectrum and how you don’t need to conform to amatonormative standards in order to have a fulfilling relationship

bcs i like the extra content and how by posting it nora gave fans like me and my mutuals a reason and a space to participate in the aftg fandom which would otherwise skew the characters completely under the guise of “healing” and we wouldn’t be able to prove it’s ooc and there would be nothing here for us

bcs i like how the fandom is not too small and not too big and it still thrives several years later, and how talented the creators are and how funny the shitposts are, and yes, how heated the discourse gets bcs it’s so interesting to see how exactly some characters, narratives and themes get skewed but also it’s good to know that there are always people out there who agree with you and that you’re not alone in relating to certain less palatable aspects of the characters

#all for the game #the foxhole court #the raven king #the king's men #aftg mine #aftg ask #while not the main reason why i love aftg #but certainly the main reason why i'm still here a year later #is the fact that andreil is the only ship i can read post canon #most other ships get boring the moment they get together #bcs they become like any other couple #but nora came and said no andreil are Not Like Other Couples #and they are still interesting in post canon #in fact now that i think of it #for other ships i read mainly the getting together fics #and am not interested in established relationship #and for andreil it's vice versa #i love how they get together in canon so much i don't want to see any other version #and post canon andreil is just my comfort read #anyway #i can't possibly explain why i love aftg just in one post #also what a strange question #are you in the fandom #or are you a random person who wants to know why i love aftg

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invitedeath · 3 years

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SEPHIROTH — relationship & plotter call.

hello lovely isolians! it’s been actually ages since i made my first one, or my second one, so i’m coming back with new vigour & hopefully some new ideas to tempt you all into friendship ( or...enemy...ship) with sephiroth!

so liking this post means that you are 100% down with interacting with me in some fashion! ways this might happen may be... → me sending you im’s / tumblr asks to plot or chat! i can be quite a talkative person as a forewarning, as i love discussing rp things as well as getting to know my rp partner! → if we are already friends on discord or twitter, i might message you that way to ask you about plots or ideas or to run things by you. → exchanging ask memes / meme day things that might be a bit more personal than a general sentence meme. → possible random starters or musings dedicated to your muse, sometimes i get sudden inspiration for these things! i will always check first that you’re okay with taking on a new thread, but yes this is for just... if i get inspired & want to put something up for you! → general tomfoolery and shenanigans in character ( and ooc if you like )

you can contact me via the im system here, by the /ask feature or you can ask for my discord/twitter if you prefer those. just let me know. discord is the most private however so we’d need to chat a bit more elsewhere first just for my comfort! i am in the isola discord sever however so we can totally talk in that server for a bit too!

FRIENDS.

↪ honestly friendships aren’t typically on the agenda for him. he is arrogant beyond belief and considers everyone to be weaker than him or to some degree unworthy of his time or energy. he really does not have any interest emotionally in anyone besides himself, instead he is far more likely to use and discard people when they are no longer needed. HOWEVER, in 2020 sephiroth underwent quite a big character development stage, essentially his long-term goal came to a head and it backfired pretty back when he got all his powers back, so while he’s super strong again now, he’s also semi-content (i guess) with living in isola for a while, if only so he can figure out how the multiverse works (meta, i know). he talks to people now (wow!) and engages in mostly philosophical conversations, about... life. death. etc.

↪ i am down to... vague villain-alliance type deals with fellow power players here. he wont consider your muse a friend, but rather a pawn or even a means to an end, that end being his goal of generally using this island for his means, apologies. preferably the intellectual, over-powered, edgy types will probably gravitate towards him more, but i’m willing to throw anything at the wall to see what sticks. he’s not a nice guy, by any means, but it would be interesting to see how he has to play the game here to his advantage until he regains powers. i especially would like to interact with other villains who are kind of just chilling, maybe they’re veterans in spirale also and they can share a glass of wine over watching all the citizens running around like ants. we could also do a murder if you are into that.

↪ there are some cases where he might engage in conversation with non-villain types and these would likely be far more dialogue-heavy threads including metaphorical topics or debates. the conversations of life, death, mortality, good vs evil, frailty of existence, legacy, power and corruption, calamities, birthright and betrayal are just some of the topics possible to arise in discussion. that being said, whilst these topics would be of interest to him, the character themselves must meet his standard of what he considers worthy of his time eg. those just willing to argue with him will bore him whereas someone curious to his nature might be treated to an actual conversation. over time this has opened up into most people being capable of talking to him. he has less patience for over-eager plucky types, but anyone with a respectable manner who likes talking a lot will probably find an interesting conversation partner in this... ONLY SLIGHTLY CHILLED sephiroth. he’s not totally chill, he’s just a lil chill.

↪ warriors, outcasts, villains, intellectuals, fellow puppet-master type villains especially, those he ‘befriended’ in past events, perhaps even neighbours to his castle would all be likely connections. friends of those he has worked alongside or met, or those wishing to seek great power and know of his existence might seek him out also, but yes... ““““friends”“““ is a very difficult term for him. he’s getting better.

→ his most recent developments see him as a far more casual version of his canon self, over a year of living as close to a “domestic life” as possible have meant that whilst he is aloof and cold, he is also far more likely to be out and about, buying wine at some creepy gas station at 4:30am for example. he chats when he’s in the mood and might even stick around to cause some chaos for the sake of boredom eating him alive. so whilst he is still very much a dangerous inhabitant here in spirale, sephiroth is currently Domesticated somewhat.

ENEMIES.

↪ heroes of all shapes and sizes might feel threatened by the ominous presence of a monster who seems inclined to side with chaos as opposed to peace. he’s not outright starting fires here but he is present in the more morbid moments of isolian discourse, an omen of death lingering on the sideline. he has his plans and he may just mock you with them, but in general since he does and WILL cut down npcs ( or players ) alike, he makes for the perfect villain. BE WARY he has all of his powers unlocked and knows the island well. fighting him would not guarantee your victory, especially if you are a freshly applied character.

in feb 2020 he almost brought chaos to spirale too so i’m sure anyone holding a grudge or wary of a potential threat like that would be very aggro towards him.

↪ he has traumas. plenty of them. some of them originate from labs and white coats, meaning he might just view you as an enemy if you’re a scientist or someone who dabbles in human experimentation. his reasons are his own, but let’s just say that if you consider him a good candidate for poking and prodding with scientific equipment, you may just lose an arm.

↪ i LOVE fight threads especially really gritty, bloody types. i would prefer to plot these out so we know what’s going on beforehand, but feel free to develop these with me honestly i love a good old classic villain hero showdown. he’s less likely to get into these without a good reason but if we do one, the winner is randomly determined via generator to make it fair if your character is also uncapped!

→ police/law enforcers/general crime stoppers might remember him for causing a bit of trouble in the past! insert how bad me be gif. try and ??? get him to apologise i guess. arresting sephiroth sounds like the plot of a funny movie.

LOVERS.

↪ this man has a bf now, can you believe it? 2021...isola gay rights.

MISC.

↪ pawns and such would be a fun dynamic later. his general presence is pretty terrifying, so it wouldn’t be a stretch if you have an appropriate muse for them to be fearful enough to carry out some little tasks for him. this might be more common later on, but i’m down to discussion for it currently!

↪ places you may find him can include: ↪ near his residence ( personal housing; castle in the mistwood ) ↪ fibonacci ward ( levels 3 and 4 especially due to the museums and things. but also the lowest levels, he tends to wander around there as if searching for something... feel free to try and figure out what it is ) ↪ golden ward ( the university if only to borrow books from the library, he can read there for days at a time without sleep or food. he reads all kinds of things, both fiction and non fiction. ) ↪ archimedes ward ( pretty much everywhere in this ward, it’s my favourite. he enjoys music and art sometimes. hit me with that biblical shit. ) ↪ the mistwood ( 100% down to be that cryptic creature that leads you from your path to your likely doom ) ↪ the city of yesteryear ( typically the underground areas, just investigating really. any strange occurrences would likely draw him there as would any presence of a strong power. ) ↪ atop skyscrapers, looming at the ‘edge’ of the world we can currently explore, typically more active at night, perhaps at the scene of a murder / attack ( plotted ), if he’s feeling extra ballsy he might be found in a bar but its very rare. very VERY rare, wandering broken buildings, invading scientific facilities or buildings. he’s not going to be found in busy, socially strained areas basically.

↪ i’m down for any ideas you might have too for plots so feel free to just message me if nothing here caters!

STATS PAGE | APPLICATION | PLOTTING PAGE

#isola relationship call #isola plotting call #cw // long post #AAAYYY

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dojae-huh · 3 years

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It's funny you avoid Doyoung Omega because to me he's an Alpha through and through (mainly because of his personality). The Omega one is clearly Jaehyun, in my humble opinion. I think he fits it better. I've also seen fics where Doyoung is a woman, photoshopped with long hair on the covers. They seem famous. I think a lot of people see Jaehyun as the obvious masculine top (same goes for Jaeyong shippers), but I don't see him like that at all, although I think of them both as vers, I find Doyoung to be more dominant (if he's bottom, then he's a power bottom). Jae's such a soft peach puppy. Peaches are delicate velvety fruits! (Hahahahhaha) He's very meek sometimes. But this is my headcanon for fanfics only, not assuming their real selves, like you said before it's silly to have a top/bottom discourse because irl it switches. (Yet some people fixate on these roles like it's important).

To each their own I guess. As long as there are fics for all tastes, it's a good thing, specially cuz Jaedo isn't as popular as others ships.

Do you have a preference between AU and canon compliant?

I don’t know how strict are the rules in ABO, I suppose some authors like to invert the trope or work with “nature vs nurture” (in other fandoms), I just know that omega Doyoung is that whiny girly OOC I avoid in any AU, be it coffeeshop or college.

Lol, do authors even realise that “legs for days” is a description of a woman. I see this in every second fanfic, while Jaehyun has the longer legs between the two (and likes to wear skinny jeans and show off). Yes, Do is often made into a proxy for the female author, conciously or not.

Peach puppy, heh, that’s a good description.

I would say canon compliant because for me artist/showbiz/idol is an interesting AU on its own, plus the reality provides so many fun scenarios... (Hyuk traumatised by Jae’s habit of emerging from the bathroom in one towel, Mark being ousted from his room, Doyoung’s broken door, TaeDo rings, Guri, Jinyong, WayV, Jungwoo’s curiosity...), but there are so few of canon compliant fics (even less truely IC), that there is no point in making this choice. Therefore, I’ll say I care only about IC and plot/writing style. Afterall, Schwarzenegger had a baby first.

Posts on the dominance/submissiveness

#Ask me away #cogito ergo ship

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bujorulgalben · 5 years

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ooc: eve goes to romania

oh yes, nailed that cover shot for you guys. took this at the top of the slope i hiked down a few times in the month i spent over there in that beautiful country.

i figured that i would bullet point the most important things that happened on this trip for you. know that i did try to keep a travel log while i was out there, but dear god i was so busy and so, so tired!

in the meantime, let’s get started:

- made new friends from across romania; notably from suceava, bacău, cluj, and maramureș. they were all eager to tell me their stories (a couple older staff members had strong childhood memories from the communist era), and share some insight with me; especially when it became obvious how curious and genuinely interested i was. i was more than happy to listen and quiz them!

for the record, maramureș palincă is easily the best i’ve had so far. smooth, despite still being fire water. i’ve also been told to visit cluj next time i’m in romania, so as to see everyone again.

my favourite romanian beer is silva blondă. i did try to like timișoreana! i did! it wasn’t happening, lads.

- the insight from my romanian friends and colleagues contributed to some great advice the camp director gave to me on buying a handmade ie; a traditional romanian blouse. i met a sweet old bunica in a local crafts fair near bran castle - maybe they were hoping to cash in on the dracula-hunting tourists? i can hardly blame them.

this bunica helped me pick an ie that matched my director’s recommendation; not loud, subtle, but undeniably elegant (”like you”, she told me. bless.) here’s what i chose:

it’s very light and breezy, which was ideal for the hotter days in the cities! the embroidery reminds me of forget-me-not’s; one of my favourite flowers.

- speaking of traditional crafts, i got very lucky and stumbled across an arts fair at the open air in sibiu. craftsmen and women around the country had gathered to show and share their goods; dolls and ceramics and rugs and painted eggs. i bought one painted egg from a lovely woman who insisted that she was more thankful than i was.

i also bought one of the dolls; very simple wood and cloth doll.

many, near all of them screamed anica energy, but i managed to control myself and buy just one. i also bought some ceramic magnets to decorate my pc with.

- uh.

nearly got hit by a pickup truck flying over a sand bank in the road. the driver slowed, lowered his window to call me a “stupid whore” in romanian, and then sped off. it wasn’t going to be a trip to ro without a near-death experience on the road.

-second “uh” moment.

i got stopped by police on the roadside early into my trip. i was quick to try and pardon myself by saying i didn’t understand what they were saying, and that i was english. i said all of this to them... in romanian. which they found very funny.

turns out they were only trying to make small talk with me. they thought i was pretty.

- teaching kids who would arrive in from around the country allowed me to get a glimpse of the city rivalries that exist here, and also ask about their/their countries’s perception of their home. the most interesting answers came from kids arriving from bucharest (european capital discourse is so fucking interesting) and ilfov; the county neighbouring bucharest.

i had been meaning to work on ileana-cosmina - my bucharest oc - and i’m much better equipped to, now.

- the kids made me an honourary romanian when i reflected on my favourite food of theirs being papanași, and spoke fondly of mămăligă.

...they then retracted my title when i said i hated pufuleți (corn puff snacks) and that i bought my cozonac for this trip from a store brand. i have got some recipes to try making that myself and to right my errors.

- with the younger kids, a “cultural exchange” worked wonders for the last days of teaching. in that, i would allow them to teach me a word in romanian, if i taught them a word in english. my accent, that i adopt when speaking romanian, surprised a lot of students and people outside of camp. even leading them to believe that i was romanian. i had to be, by their logic, as i wasn’t speaking english. i wish more people would try.

i got to chat to a lot more with my friends, the romanian translators, about romanian movies and popular media. many of the translators were also political science students; we chatted at length abt the political situation here.

i’ve been asked to revise my master’s dissertation for their reading pleasure. lol dammit.

- living in the cindrel mountains meant that i got to take my water every water from a spring. well, a hose redirecting water from a spring. sometimes you get small queues of people with petrol tankers from all over, filling em with water.

- i met a math teacher from iași here at this spring, actually! he had previously done construction work in london, chasing a well-known dream, and hated it. he hated everything about it, so returned to romania and to his teaching job. he wanted me to know that “so long as i have ideas, i don’t need money”. many adult men i spoke to here echoed the same sentiment, and pride themselves on their resourcefulness.

- the stars are something else here. got me feeling a certain way.

- third “uh” moment.

on most nights, the camp hosts an outdoor disco for the kids. most nights, at on point, included the assumption of mary; a religious holiday. the weekend after this holiday apparently counted, also, as the hotel lower down on the hill felt the need to make multiple noise complaints.

the police eventually turned up and forced the night of dancing to end early. i recognised a few exchanged curse words.

- asides the fridge magnets and ie, a car icon, and a hand-painted plate for my future homemade cozonac, i also frequented a literature/history bookstore and found some textbooks i used heavily as points of reference for my research, but in romanian. so i might practice my translation skills, soon!

- okay i’m done. thank you for reading. :)

there’s photo posts to look forward to, as well, i promise.

#mâna autorului ✧ ooc #it was a very eventful month i promise you that

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violetbard · 6 years

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Villain muses are bad!...duh.

Hey guys! Some of us like problematic favs right? That’s not blockworthy in 2018, right? Hah.

Some characters are not villains or big bads like Lord English or HIC. Some of them can be questionable anti-heroes, like Vriska Serket. Other’s can just be filler jerkasses, like Zebruh or Cronus. Some characters can vary based on their AUs or the development they receive, but one thing’s for certain: They all fall under the category of antagonizing.

So let’s call this article, Villainy: The opinionated 101 of antagonizing characters, where the term villain will just be a jumble of all of these conflict characters.

Playing a villain is fun! Playing with villains can be a great writing experiment! Though there are some things to note, whether you go up to a villain, are a villain, or are wondering what makes a villain an enjoyable experience for all.

(Personal) Tips on playing an interesting one

This varies from person to person, but I know when I’ve found particularly interesting villians, I look for the following:

Muns that know their character enough to not just have them as a generic meanie/bad guy versus having their own spice to their actions.

Having a character who isn’t JUST antagonizing. Having personality, essentially. Do they like animals? Do they have a favorite show or pastime? Fears? A moment where they can actually talk normally to people? Let’s explore those too, so their brooding or shouting doesn’t get too repetitive.

Villians that offer challenge and further interaction with muses versus simple quips. Villians like HIC for example, I can imagine really making things interesting by actively pursuing someone who’s pissed her off versus leaving it at a simple flame war online.

Villains that don’t read as harassing through muse, from the mun.

Muns that know that their villians are villians versus getting overly defensive about the fact if brought up.

Villains that aren’t nerfed of their awfulness, but can be played in a way to evade certain areas if need be.

Again it varies, but that’s just me!

When playing a Villain

This kinda falls more into conduct and interaction.

Consent is still relevant, even if someone has willingly followed you. If you plan on going hard on someone’s muse, ask if that’s okay. It’s not hard to see if someone wants to deal with excessive IC drama after a long day or something.

Say that IC discourse comes from a gradual build without much talk before hand. Well, if a mun eventually contacts you, asking if you can chill on the antagonizing, whether they want it to simmer or not start at all one day, respect that. Not everyone has the spoons to deal and it’s not hindering your experience to get that people wanna sometimes safe word themselves out of your foreplay some days.

If you are antagonizing a muse, and you get upset or ask someone to chill only when your muse is getting hammered back on, consider why you’re playing a villian and if you should. The only times I see this as okay is if you’re getting circled by people you don’t follow/don’t want to interact with.

There are some themes that your villain probably shouldn’t pull out of the blue on a random muse. Maybe some themes that shouldn’t even be on dash. Use your critical thinking skills.

When playing with a Villian

A lot of it parallels the above points.

Consent is still relevant. Funny enough, muns may not always want their villains to be targeted on one day if they’re looking for more casual rps.

If the mun wants to pull of rping with their villain during a wild situation, let that be respected. Sometimes people may lose track of how big their villainy gets and want to simmer down the situation to something more controllable.

If you attack a villian, don’t opt out and ask for the mun to nerf their antagonizing once you get a response. If you’re only interacting with a villian for your muse to insult without getting any consequence, verbal or physical based, then.......why, honestly? Again there can be limits, but not when it’s all in your favor.

Be incredibly mindful of in-character accusations against villians. Unless it’s on their blog (or it’s a common trope/not infomodding) it’s probably best to ask OOC before your character accuses a villain of doing any particular vile acts on dash, or spreading such information to other muses without OOC confirmation on certain facts. Such things can lead to sensitive topics being brought up that a mun may want to avoid, or for misinformation to be spread that keep people from interacting from an OOC boundary with that character, and to cause false judgement.

Sooooo yep! I hope this came off as unbias, lmao. I love antagonizing characters and I love when things especially get interesting on dash with them.

Other dumb essays I’m proud of:

Hemoism vs Racism

OOC Communication

Stealing Art

#ooc #rp etiquette #squatting with more essays on main ))

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asagimeta · 7 years

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Pack Mom Stiles And You: No, It Isn’t As Bad As You May Have Heard

The Teen Wolf fandom is a very ficcy, very tropey place- wich, let me start by saying, is not a bad thing, I like it, personally- you can take just about any charector and any trope and anything that RESEMBLES a trope and make into A Thing

There's good-freind!Scott, bad-freind!Scott, good-Alpha!Scott, bad-Alpha!Scott, bad-Alpha!Derek, good-Alpha!Derek, Unicorns-Love-Derek, serial-killer!Derek, serial-killer!Stiles, assassin!Stiles, BAMF!Stiles, magic!Stiles, virgin!Stiles, sex-crazy!Stiles, Omega!Stiles, Alpha!Stiles, and - ... I'm not even coming close to scratching the first layer of the surface, but there's one trope in particular that always gets my interest- good and bad:

Pack Mom Stiles

Because here's the thing- I. freaking. LOVE. Pack Mom Stiles

It has GOT to be one of my favorite tropes, so why does it always put me on edge? Because people have such a negative perception of Pack Mom Stiles, and I've seen some really, really rude, and insulting things said about people who like Pack Mom Stiles- and I mean, sure, there's a *level* of this to be said of all tropes, all kinks, all ships, but there's a certain level of discourse with Pack Mom Stiles that I rarely see outside of ship or kink centric tropes, or tropes that seriously damage a charector (like the Derek Is A Bad Alpha trope or the Evil Scott McCall trope) Pack Mom Stiles is... really very innocent, but it gets alot of flack and actually raises alot of controversy, and there's a reason for it, but first, I want to address why I'm making this post to begin with:

Pack Mom Stiles isn't always the trope that people think it is

Generally, from what I've seen of fandom, people see "Pack Mom Stiles" and assume it's Stiles in an apron, making sure Isaac has his homework and always making pack dinners and having essentially no ability to defend himself against enemies- often being called "Mom" unironically, and wile yes, there are SOME Pack Mom Stiles fics like this, that does not define the trope as an entirety, and it doesn't invalidate the reading of Pack Mom Stiles as a canon thing

People see "Pack Mom Stiles" and alot of them automatically think it's the trope listed above- and sometimes it is, and there's nothing wrong with writing that if you want to write it, kink and let kink, ship and let ship, trope and let trope- but there are plenty of times when that isn't the case, and in particular, when talking in a canon sense- in a current-canon sense especially- that usually *isn't* the case

The thing is, people are hesitant about Pack Mom Stiles (and I use "hesitant" politely) because of gender stereotypes and heteronormativity, Stiles, being the young, funny, human who has been shown to be sqeumish and nerdy, who is physically smaller than most of the men on the show (not necessarily shorter, but less overtly muscular) is usually cast in a stereotypical female role- the homemaker, the bottom, the sub, the Omega, the gentle voice of reason to his more stereotypically masculine partner's quick temper, and this isn't *good*

Individually, there's nothing wrong with homemaker!Stiles, bottom!Stiles, sub!Stiles, Omega!Stiles, level-headed!Stiles, or even Stiles who likes to wear make up and high heels on the weekends, often, it's less the trope/kink/role, and more the way it's presented, often erasing Stiles' personality for someone quiet, defenseless, and stereotypically feminine, and often presenting it as the *ONLY* way it can be, I still remember the "Bottom Derek Is Wrong" controvsery of 2014 and it's exactly *THAT* reason why people are, rightfully so, a little tense about Pack Mom Stiles

Additionally, Pack Mom Stiles is one of The Olden Tropes from before I was even reading Teen Wolf fic, you know, the season 1-2 tropes like Derek coming in through a window and rough-sexing Stiles or werewolf!Lydia or Stiles Has A Bunch Of Drag Queen Freinds, tropes that are fun but didn't really survive the fandom-wide transition between seasons two and three, Pack Mom Stiles is one of the few survivors of that era and alot of people take issue with the political incorrectness of it, the trope name came out of two places:

1. Stiles is The Mom Freind, everyone knows what The Mom Freind is, it's a very, very real thing in real life and Stiles very easily fits the bill, this in it's *SELF* is not necessarily heteronormative or feminizing, if you're a caretaker to your peer group you're called The Mom Freind, and it CAN be heteronormative or feminizing but it isn't that way by definition, I've been called The Mom Freind, I've also been called Daddy (I am a 22-year-old girl who's favorite color is pink and sleeps with stuffed animals, FYI) because I can sometimes get Over Protective of my female freinds in a stereotypical dad way- and because my dog is glued to my mom until something scares her, then she won't get off of me to save her life, but I digress

2. See, in The Olden Tropes era of the Teen Wolf fandom, Stiles Is Pack Mom wasn't your only parent-related trope, you also had Pack Dad Derek, and, less commonly starting in season three, Pack Dad Scott, wich, you guessed it, is *much* more heteronormative and gender stereotyping, these are the fics where Derek trains the pack and Stiles bakes cookies, or where Scott is trying to give sage advice wile Stiles tells him to get his feet off the coffee table, and again, if these float your boat, cool, I'm not saying they can't be a thing or that they're the type of Inherently Wrong Thing that shouldn't exist, but this is a large part of why people make assumptions about Pack Mom Stiles

(As a note, I've seen Pack Mom Stiles recently renamed as Pack Dad Stiles wich seems much better received, if not pretty uncommon)

The reason I'm making this post is because fans of Pack Mom Stiles seem to be ... ashamed of it, and I get why, I've had hate sent my way for liking Pack Mom Stiles too, fans of it treat the trope like a guilty pleasure the way you would treat an X-Rated kink or a Bad Wrong ship, always quick to say "Not in canon but-" or "I know it isn't canon but-" or "I know it's OOC but-" as if Pack Mom Stiles is *inherently* the same thing as the OOC Stiles who bakes cookies wile Derek is training the pack and lint-rolls Isaac's scarves for him after making him lunch with the crust cut off- it isn't

Part of it too is that moms themselves are stereotyped this way, seen a hell of alot more often as June Cleaver or Carol Brady and alot less as Beatrix Kiddo or Molly Weasley, in fact, it was hard of me to think of an easily nameable "good" mom who WASN'T more stereotypically like June or Carol, and I'm still not entirely confident about my choices, I often gripe to my own mom when Mother's Day rolls around that the advertised Mother's Day gifts are always the same- gardening, cooking, or clothes- and not especially *nice* clothes either, things like- you guessed it- hats, aprons, t-shirts with "I Love My Kids" on them and the like... as if women lose their personalities once they become moms, but again, I digress

Stiles is not June Cleaver, and alot of people assume that's what Pack Mom Stiles fics try to turn him into- and some do, but then you have the Pack Mom Stiles *I* like, that I wish more people were aware of, that I fully believe fits well with canon!Stiles, no personality warping or heteronormative gender stereotyping required: The Beatrix Kiddo Stiles

The Stiles that, yeah, makes dinner sometimes, and sure, tells the werewolves to kindly take their rough-housing OUTSIDE before they break ANOTHER of his computers..... but who, mostly, will tear someone's eyes out if they hurt someone in his pack, who rolls threats off of his tongue like a song, who is quite frankly DONE with everyone else's BS and is THIS. CLOSE. to screaming about it, who takes care of his pack and protects his pack against threats- be it with his bat or emissary magic or just by wrestling a werewolf to a ground and punching them in the face, the strategist, the planner, the "I make everything work even if it means I have to cut off someone's fingers or go without sleep for six days because none of you would be able to sniff your way out of a cardboard box without me", he's the one who makes the hard choices to protect his pack even if he comes up short because of it, who, once he loves someone, is going to keep them alive weather they like it or not for God's sake! Pack Mom Stiles is....

#Teen Wolf #Stiles Stilinski #Pack Mom Stiles

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amourete-blog1 · 7 years

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(( opinions.

the “realistic” approach to online interactions doesn’t work. it’s a fundamentally flawed system for several reasons, which is exacerbated by the fact that people on tumblr are afraid of face-to-face interactions. even if one singular person isn’t afraid of it, the community as a whole is, and that’s a BAD habit.

fact: some characters will not get along unless they are literally forced to spend time together. this is one of several dynamics that makes rp interesting for quite a few people. if it’s not your fancy, more power to you, but for some people it is, and the current community approach to rp is crippling their ability to explore that. characters can have WILDLY different views on certain subjects, which are usually formed by people they look up to, people in their life, things they’ve researched or things they’ve personally experienced, among likely several other sources. these differences should be encouraged, not smothered. it’s not fun to rp when every character is exactly the same.

the usage of ic blocking so flippantly is a huge factor in smothering those differences in characters. as rpers, interactions are our lifeblood. without them, we can’t rp. rp is one of the few things a person cannot do by themselves, like it’s literally impossible - if you’re rping by yourself, you’re writing a novel. it’s no longer rp.

when characters icly block each other, that cuts off an avenue for those characters to interact, which means one less interaction for both those characters, ESPECIALLY because again: we as a community are afraid of ftf roleplay, so there’s no other alternative route. some rpers can take that hit, of losing one possible rper. most can’t. if your character is one of the types that is hard to love, you get a lot of people blocking you, you’ve now effectively cut off a whole circle of interactions, and here’s the worst part: when someone blocks you, there is virtually nothing you can do.

therefore, we as rpers learn that we “can’t” have our characters have those opinions/do those things, or else they will be blocked and we will be rendered incapable of rping. for “survival” in this community, we sacrifice diversity, because otherwise we know we literally won’t be able to rp. that’s not okay. and yes, some brave souls will do it anyway, but i would urge anyone to consider: how many people have you actually seen rp with those people? because all the numbers i come up with are typically pretty low.

oocly, it makes sense to block people you don’t want to talk to. it makes perfect sense, and i’ve done it several times myself. blocking is a wonderful tool that absolutely should be used. however, when used in-character, it presents massive problems, like this. rp does not strictly follow the rules of real life. that’s why we have aliens, and magic, and “coincidences” that add up to the conclusion both/all rpers want. if you’re looking for truly, flawlessly realistic rp, go talk to someone offline and have adventures. we write fiction here.

solutions: stop using in-character blocking except as a very, very last resort, and provide a way for the character to be unblocked. if a character blocks another character, expect character b to be unblocked at a later time, whether by character a’s choice, by a malfunction, by outside interference or anything else - and moreover, put plans in place for that to happen. provide a means.

fact: characters do not have their own autonomy. they are fictional. they can’t think or act for themselves, we as muns are always in control. if a mun is not in control of their character 100% of the time, that is actually, truly dangerous to everyone involved, and should not be encouraged.

we make judgements about what our characters would do in situations based on information we’ve gathered about them. it’s a really remarkable ability our brains have. we can put ourselves in their shoes, but at the end of the day, we are still making that choice to have them act on whatever they act on, think whatever they think, and so on. yes, impulses are a thing. yes, sometimes they greatly benefit an rp. no, they do not always have to be followed.

having characters react to every single thing they see can sometimes be good for sparking interactions, but most of the time, it’s exhausting. perpetuating an atmosphere where characters that DON’T interact with absolutely everything they see is frowned upon/discouraged is ultimately harmful. if an rper, ooc, is uncomfortable with something, or just doesn’t want to rp it, the atmosphere we should be perpetuating is one of “that’s okay. you aren’t obligated to rp this.” and if it’s brought up to them personally, rather than just being flung out in the abyss, we should be encouraging them to break character and talk ooc.

reacting to content, whether directly or indirectly (vagueposting, purposefully loudly ignoring by trying to redirect the topic) rewards behavior and furthers that content. if you don’t want to interact with content, don’t. don’t have your character vague. don’t have them scream at the top of their lungs about how nice the weather is where they are. that’s still an interaction. when you interact ic, you are confirming that you are okay with what is going on. if that’s not true, rpers need to stop interacting. they need to break character, and they need to say “i’m not okay with this.”

no, this isn’t a matter of “don’t assume consent.” online we have literally no other indicators of whether someone is uncomfortable or not. we just have the text we��re given. it is impractical at absolute best to constantly ask “are you okay with this,” and impossible at worst, because we’d be accenting every line with that question to the point where it would be just the same as before: assumed. we must, must start pushing for people to communicate ooc, immediately, when they are uncomfortable or otherwise not cool with what’s going on.

solutions: if an rper doesn’t want to have their character engage with a certain topic, have them do something else. not out of spite, not as if they’re trying to distract, just... something else, for its own merit. they can hit someone up in ims. they can start a different post. sometimes this doesn’t work because the discussion is so widespread, but that’s kind of... just how it goes. we as a community should also try to encourage this method by interacting with that content too, but sometimes it’s not what people want to do, sometimes it just doesn’t happen. whatever it is, though, it’s still better than icly interacting with the thing you don’t want to interact with.

that being said, widespread dash discussions of bad shit, like we’ve seen with the hemoism, slavery, etc discussions, are a problem. it would be good to mitigate those, a lot more than they are now. tagging is a good step, but interacting with non-Big Bad Discourse (BBD) topics will help too. like sandwich discourse - that was good. if someone’s trying to make a joke, we can help them! we can interact with them and help them make their joke, then we get something funny and everyone wins. if someone starts dropping hints in a post/dropping interesting information, it’s probably because they’re seeking interaction. scratch that: if they make a post, period, it’s because they’re seeking interaction because again, it’s the lifeblood of rp. it’s what we do. likes are great, replies are better, reblogs are top-tier. interact with content you want more of. we all want more diversity in the content we see here, so let’s make that happen, and “vote with our feet.”

and no this post isn’t actually solely re: hemoism discourse ooc talk. it’s actually opinions i’ve had for a while. i kinda just woke up and was like “hey i maybe want to talk about this.” the purpose of this post is me hoping to make a couple ripples in the community as a whole and maybe change the way we do/think about certain things. i really like this community, i love the people i’ve met, and i want to see it get better. if you don’t agree with me, that’s your prerogative, but i do hope you’ve at least thought about what i’ve said.

floor is open to discussion if anyone has anything to say/add.

#ooc post #/#//#///#////#ooc discussion #not re: discourse specifically but discussion nonetheless on ooc best practices #it's also very long - sorry.#long post /#god i hope my edits go through i found 2 big errors since i posted this

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