#this is my formal application

[dionysianchub]

I've had this ongoing fantasy of being my office's communal pet pig. Everyone's blubbered up little toy to fatten, play with, and abuse to get their stress out and get through the day.

In the mornings come the sweets. Donuts, muffins, scones, and every sticky, sugary breakfast treat that can be carried in those familiar pink boxes gets delivered to my desk. People take turns shoving a few pastries in my mouth before wiping the sticky mess from their fingers onto my too-tight shirt, a couple of them give my belly a few firm slaps before heading to their desk to work. A few stay behind to watch me paw through the pastries, gorging myself as my chair creaks weakly as it struggles to support my growing weight. They have a betting pool going to see how much longer it can hold out.

At lunch time they come by with the unwanted scraps of their own meals, a few committed individuals packing full lunches just for the office pig. They marvel at my gluttony, treating me like the human garbage disposal I am, and watching in mixed pleasure and disgust as I eat everything they give me through heavy breaths and muffled burps. "Good job, fatass." they say, grabbing and shaking one of my overflowing rolls and watching my fat body ripple from the motion. A stray button flies off my shirt, and the person feeding me starts fingering the newly exposed gap in the fabric, prodding my plush blubber as they shove another large bite of food down my throat.

At the end of the day I'm waddling to get to my car, painfully stuffed and aroused from being used as everyone's tubby stress ball all day long, clothing barely hanging on, stretched over the too-full belly now hanging out the bottom of my shrinking shirt. And it's only Wednesday.

#fat fantasy #force feeding fantasy #tw fat shaming #tw degradation #office pig #i want to be a community hog #this is my formal application

[fairy-boy-butch]

I would be such a good house butch let me take care of you pretty working women of the world

#v screams #butchfemme #id welcome you home everyday with dinner and your favorite drink #this is my formal application

[ohshittheyreonfire]

Let me beta read yalls fics please

#i love them sm #please ill do anything #did u know that im good at reading #im also good at rewriting stuff #this is my formal application #to be a beta reader #idk if this will reach anyone but atp idc #i just wanna read #its also so fun to know stuff before other people #istg beta reading is like keeping a secret that your bestie told you #except its a fic #full of stunning writing #my dms are open #ILL DO IT FOR FREE I PROMISE

[avsandflyboys]

logan oconnor i am in love with you

#this is my formal application #your hand in marriage sir #avs lb

[cheese-water]

Generation Loss is a comedic tragedy in every sense of the word. Every character we see exemplifies this fact, but no one other than The Austin Show proves its truth.

We begin at the carousel. Austin, Gay, takes his turn by pleading for himself to live because he has a wife and children back home. The rest of the cast interrogates him about his “wife and kids,” clearly suspicious of his truthfulness without even knowing his dubbed “title.” Everyone in the room treats Austin like a joke.

In turn, so do we.

Next, we reach the closet and shortly after the failed drag show, Austin remarks, “Look, I uh… I didn’t expect to die here.” It’s a moment of pure honesty, whether we like it or not. It happens again when the Puzzler tries to party with them, and Austin has to angrily remind him that they are his captives and are actively trying to kill them.

Austin: “What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? We're trying to get out of here. I have children and wives— wife. One wife! What is this some sort of game? I’ve been stuck in hear for hours it seems. We’re trying to get out. Why is nobody else freaking out? We’ve got C4 strapped to our neck…”

It isn’t until Ethan’s death, his blood pooling out from underneath the door, Austin screaming at the others, begging them to have a reaction, to care about their circumstances, to care about death, that we finally understand Austin’s role in Generation Loss.

After all, in every great comedy, someone always has to play the straight man.

#generation loss #genloss #ranboo #ranboolive #austin show #I LOVE IMPROV STORYTELLING SO MUCH #You can pry genloss improv from my cold dead hands #yeah yeah the pacing was funky #But you can’t ignore the joy it brings when it creates accidental dramatic irony #I adore it so #remember the artwork of genloss characters as card suits? #Like Ranboo is the diamond Sneeg is the spade and Charlie as the club? #This is my formal application to make Austin the heart #he always talks about love and his family is his motivation to keep going and oof :( #he deserved so much better #gl!austin

[brakingpoint]

australian gp 2023 x red flags by mimi webb 🇦🇺🚩

#this is my formal application to edit the race highlights for the f1 youtube channel #f1 #formula 1 #australian gp 2023

[sgsketchbook]

i follow where my mind goes

#this is my formal application for membership in kenstewy nation #kendall roy #stewy hosseini #when will he come back btw. i miss him #kenstewy #kenstewy art #succession #hbo succession #succession fanart

[dahldahlbills]

compliment his hair right now 🫵

#higashikata josuke #diamond is unbreakable #jjba fanart #jojo’s bizarre adventure #jojo no kimyou na bouken #jojo no kimyō na bōken #jojo fanart #josuke #josuke higashikata #jjba part 4 #jjba #dahls art #feeling kinda obnoxious with all those tags yikes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #my sweet boy!! he is so baby!! so silly!! I love him sm!!! #also the caption.. I *dont* mean compliment the way I drew it lmao #it’s just his thing. if you get it you get it #I also really like the lines in this. finally found a brush I really vibe with :D #he’s talking to okuyasu on the phone btw :] #anyway hello jojo fandom this is my formal application for mutuals 👉👈

[suitehearttts]

peter, harold, and spider-verse!gwen from the sketchbook :)

#this is my formal application to enter parksborn tumblr ily #parksborn #pater parker #harry osborn #gwen stacy #spiderverse #TASM #can you tell which Harry i have a bigger crush on LMFAO #my sketchbook #mine #suiteheartts art

[thalys-artcorner]

“You showed the spirit of a True Warrior”

Finan and Eadith from The Last Kingdom. Or as I like to say, one badass lady and her simping, lovestruck himbo.

#The Last Kingdom #finan #finan the last kingdom #finan the agile #eadith #eadith of mercia #eadith the last kingdom #tlk #the last kindgom fan art #fan art #my fanart #the last kingdom fanart #digital art #artists on tumblr #consider this my formal application to be adopted by two fictional characters #thank you #mark rowley

[cfcreative]

Actual brain processes of Korydass trying to flirt with Karlach.

What she rehearses:

What she manages to blurt out:

#It’s honestly about this dire #kory learned Incredibly Formal Courting from her several thousand year old Grandsire #it is not at all applicable to the real world #baulders gate 3 #bg3 #baldur's gate iii #karlach #my tav #OC: Korydass

[calamitys-child]

I should be able to put "Come watch me" on my cv I just managed to turn two very angry customers who were fizzing about venue staff into happy friendly customers with their show tickets a gin and tonic and a well organised spreadsheet in hand and the information about who made a mistake how it happened and who to contact about it (coincidentally a different company entirely) and who became immediately convinced to be loyal returning customers in under five minutes. I'm not even a supervisor. This is why you should promote me. Don't make me interview my application should be allowed to simply be "check this shit out"

#i shouldnt have to interview im not good at interviews but ken what im BANGIN at? my JOB #watch what i can do even this low on the company hierarchy. salary me. you wouldn't regret it. #anyway formal applications for promotion Are now open so i Will be doing the paperwork but . i dont want to have to #it should be like the accessible exams in school where if youre bad at written you can opt to demo in front of witnesses instead

[ren-from-mars]

Me when a single day alters the course of my life forever

#in a good way ofc #(gonna start rambling today was a good day) #so like. made plans last night to hop on and play some warframe with a friend #thst friend is uber cool. and also american so we dont get to vc and game togethdr much #but i woke up at 8 30 #had brekkie #and got on at 9 #played gamed with coolest homie for 3 hours #watched the first ep of jjk while eating food w them and takijg a breather from games #as we finished up motivation hit so i had my adhd med abt 20 mins before we finished #cut my hair so i no longer feel wonky abt the length #tried a new way of styling the cut and it works really well #then went to the mall to get some things ive been meaning to get for years #came back home cleaner my room #saw facebook advert for a job opportunity i have been seeking out for quite some time #sent in a very formal and well written email application while figuring out how to go further in depth about the things i said #went back to room and sewed on the last remaining badge for my scout uniform #checked up on fb for scout things happening tonight #hyped myself up to go #night went better than i thought it would and nobody got unreasonably upset and everyone stayed levelheaded #and!! i got secretary!! one of the four core exec roles!!! #came home and chatted to parents about an event they went to #it was just. such a good day #and now i eeby #ren rambles #OH AND NOT TO MENTION #before i came home but after scouts #i talked with my closest friends abt my hyperfixations (and the ones we share!!) and it was sososo fun #i love sharing hyperfixes with friends #<3333

[ratscabies]

today the older lady I was sharing eclipse glasses with was asking me about my future plans, and then she asked me if getting into a phd program was hard, and I just

#maam im trying to get a doctorate from one of the top rated universities in the country #like yes my application materials matter #no theyre not just a formality

[saturatedsinset]

just lost a job I was very clearly the employer's top candidate for because I don't have a car

#just. really upset. #it was a library job that they brought me back for several interviews and even gave me the fucking written schedule for #the attitude at the interviewcwas very we just need to finalize this formally #and now. you don't have a car so tough shit #like what am i meant to do? buy a car? I have $2 #to my name #i have reliable transportation! i expressed this at the interview!!!!! #it's just. it's so upsetting #ive sent off so many applications and ive gotten 2 interviews total. both for this job. and i just #idk. really upset. #sinjamin

[non-un-topo]

WHY DO I ALWAYS SOUND LIKE JIGSAW IN EMAILS

#currently fighting for my life trying to send an application (begging for money) #i'm so formal for no reason like: 'Good morning Nicholas. My name is ____ _____. I am a _____ student at __ University.' #LIKE WHY SO ROBOTIC I DON'T KNOW HOW TO WRITE EMAILS #this is for a --- get this. this is for a paid job working in the library. BUT it's technically a bursary #so while normally you'd just be getting money with bursaries based on financial need. for this one you work for it #which is fine. i genuinely want to work in this library SO badly #but the application is designed like a bursary application. no resume. no cover letter. #greatly reduces my chances of getting this job that i really want and may in fact be qualified for.