#this was actually quite difficult to discern

[hooniblr]

𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 (𝐘𝐄𝐓) 𝐈𝐈

PAIRING ▸ nishimura riki x female feader

WORD COUNT ▸ 4.8k

GENRE ▸ high school au, brother’s best friend au, fluff, angst

SYNOPSIS ▸ After spending the better part of your adolescent life crushing on your brother’s best friend, you finally decide to call it quits on your unrequited feelings when you come to the conclusion that’s all they will ever be—unrequited. The only problem is that getting rid of these feelings that have been lurking in your heart is much more difficult than you anticipated. Especially because the object of your affections keeps making it hard for you to move on.

Or the one where Riki resorts to blackmail.

WARNINGS ▸ reader as sunoo’s twin sister, riki as sunoo’s bestie, feat. some of the newjeans members, reader is an expert at hiding her feelings, misunderstandings, pining, slow burn, blackmail, broken promises, hurt feelings

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NOTE — thank you for all the love on part one! hope you guys like this part. mdni banner made by @/benkeibear

“You still haven’t told Sunoo about your new hobby?”

“No. I know he would just worry about me getting hurt.” You sighed. “So would my parents.”

Minji furrowed her eyebrows. “Don’t you think hiding it is doing too much? You’re not doing anything bad. It’s just jiujitsu.”

“You know how my mom gets. She wants me to do things ‘normal girls do’ like that’s going to make me act like her friends’ kids. Remember when she tried to make me join the choir?”

“Yeah.” Danielle grimaced. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you get so embarrassed.”

You and Minji shared her grimace. Your audition probably went down as the worst in the history of the entire school. “I’m actually kind of good at jiujitsu, and I like doing it. If I tell Sunoo about it he won’t let me go back to the dojo ever again.”

Minji sighed. She knew you were right. Having an overprotective family would be the death of you.

“Come on.” She said, hoping to distract you from your inner turmoil. “Let’s go eat in the courtyard.”

“You don’t want to go to the cafeteria?”

"Riki’s in there.” Danielle reminded you. “So is Heeseung.”

“True.” You pursed your lips. “I’ll meet you guys out there. I have to drop off Sunoo’s stuff first.”

The hallway was relatively empty when you wandered up the stairs. You were glad no one was around because it would make it easier to drop off your brother’s bag—which he had inconveniently forgotten in the morning, again. When you glanced inside his classroom, it was completely alone, much to your relief.

After dumping the bag on his desk, you made a run for it. Sure, you were probably being overly paranoid, but you couldn’t risk running into Riki. Especially not after last night.

“Kim Y/N.”

Hearing your full government name made you freeze just before you reached the stairs. Your heart and mind had memorized that smooth melody long ago. You slowly turned around, heart stuttering despite knowing what sight awaited you. Riki’s usually sweet gaze had been replaced with one that was full of disapproving anger and something else; something you couldn’t discern.

“Riki.” You said his name breathlessly.

Your wide-eyed gaze only confirmed his suspicions. Up until now, you never had a problem being around him, or even looking at him. Right now, Riki could see that you were itching to get away from him as if he was some sort of parasite. He knew your awkward behavior was nothing more than a byproduct of hanging around that bastard Lee Heeseung, and it only made his anger grow immutably.

“I saw you last night.” Riki’s tone was accusing, knowing he was approaching the situation in a completely immature way. “I know you haven’t been hanging out at the internet cafe. You go to that dojo with Lee Heeseung.”

Out of all the things you expected Riki to say, him bringing up your secret jiujitsu lessons wasn’t on the list. It was clear that he disapproved, but you weren’t sure why he seemed as upset as he did. Did he know Sunoo wouldn’t approve as well? They truly were best friends. You were glad to see that the loyalty wasn’t just a one-way street despite the fact that it was now backfiring on you.

And so, like a deer caught in headlights, you could only blink at him bovinely as he gave you a stare that demanded answers.

“Does Sunoo know what you’ve been doing instead of going home?”

Your eyes widened in realization. Riki was going to rat you out.

“Please don’t say anything.” You begged, clasping your fingers together to form the classic pleading gesture. “I know he wouldn’t approve, and if he tells our parents then I won’t be able to go anymore.”

Riki clenched his jaw. Was being able to see that idiot so important to you? Enough to risk getting in trouble with your parents? He wondered how you would feel about Heeseung if you knew the truth about him. You definitely wouldn’t feel the same way about him if you found out what kind of person he really was.

Even so, your shimmering eyes had him thinking twice about ruining what you had with Heeseung. He could see that you were clearly infatuated with that idiot to the point that you were willing to upset your entire family by seeing him. The fact that you were even willing to go to that stupid dojo with him was enough indication of how much you liked him. (As if you avoiding him wasn’t proof enough.)

“Well—”

“Y/N!”

Sunoo bounded over to you with his rowdy friends following close behind him. Your panic-filled eyes glanced from Riki to your brother. You tried to straighten out your dismayed expression with a tense smile.

“Twin!” You exclaimed a little too happily. “I left your bag on your desk.”

“Oh, that’s right. I forgot—”

“I’ll see you at home.” You rushed out, not giving either boys a chance to respond before you took off down the stairs.

Luckily for you, neither of them followed after you. As you reached the bottom of the stairs, you looked back just to make sure. At that moment, you bumped into someone and nearly fell back. Stumbling awkwardly, you started to apologize for not watching where you were going.

“It’s okay. You’re not hurt, are you?”

Seeing Sunghoon’s worried expression almost made you roll your eyes. Instead, you told him you were fine and kept walking because the last thing you needed was to deal with your ex. Unfortunately, you weren’t allowed a stealthy getaway.

“What’s going on between you and Lee Heeseung?”

You glanced over your shoulder, annoyed that Sunghoon was following you. It would’ve been easy to ignore him, but you knew he wasn’t going to leave you alone since he had asked you in that nosy tone of his. “What are you talking about?”

“I saw you two at Jake’s party.” Sunghoon sounded insecure or something close to it. “Do you like him or something?”

An incredulous scoff tumbled past your lips. “What do you care? Are you jealous?”

“Yes—extremely.” His pout was objectively cute, but you couldn’t see it as anything other than annoying. “Since when did you start hanging around Lee Heeseung?”

It was usually easy for you to hide your feelings, but now your indignation was the one taking control as you turned to face him. “Around the time you stopped.”

Sunghoon’s eyes widened. If Heeseung had mentioned their brief friendship to you, it’s because he had explicit trust in you. The theory that he concocted the other night couldn’t be too far off from the truth. It made him feel a terrible dread in his gut. Heeseung wasn’t the type to reveal any private information, which brought Sunghoon back to the conclusion that you weren’t just anyone his former friend.

“So, Heeseung likes you then.”

You don’t think you had ever heard anything more ridiculous. It was obvious that Sunghoon was still too self absorbed to see that Heeseung had been pining for Song Yura for the longest time. His unrequited feelings are the reason you two had gotten so close. Not that it was any of your ex’s business.

You scoffed quietly before an apathetic smile spread on your lips. “Think what you want.”

Sunghoon frowned. As he went to say something else, you went out the exit leading to the courtyard. He could only watch you walk away from him with a disheartened expression.

Thinking you had successfully gotten him to back off was your first mistake.

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“Which movie did you pick?” You wondered as you put the popcorn bag in the microwave.

“I didn’t pick one yet.” Sunoo said from the living room. “Riki’s coming over so I wanted to let him decide on the movie too.”

You nearly dropped the bowl you pulled out of the cabinet. Maybe you should’ve felt upset that Sunoo conveniently forgot to mention that his bestie was crashing your movie night, but you were too panicked to feel angry or anything related to that emotion. It didn’t even have to do with the fact that you were practically in love with Riki. Instead it was about the not-so-small tidbit that he knew your secret and was probably planning to tell your brother all about it.

“I thought you said it was just going to be us tonight.” You did your best to sound upset although you were sure your voice was shaking.

“Riki wanted to hang out. You know I can’t tell him no.” Sunoo pouted as you went to sit by him. “You’ve never had a problem with him coming over before.”

That was before you decided to get over him.

“The three of us haven’t hung out together in a while. It’ll be good for him to come over, anyway. He could use your advice.”

“My advice?” You mimicked curiously. “Advice for what?”

“He got a love letter from Song Yura today.” Sunoo said with a giddy laugh. “He didn’t let me see what it said, but I think she confessed to him.”

“Maybe it wasn’t a love letter.” You said pathetically, knowing it was your wishful thinking doing the talking.

“But she even has his helmet. Not his extra one, his favorite one. I’m sure it won’t be long before they’re a couple.”

It was hard not to feel like a deflated balloon with what Sunoo was saying. Not only because Song Yura was obviously someone very special to Riki (he didn’t let just anyone touch that helmet), but because you knew Heeseung was going to feel heartbroken once he heard the news.

You couldn’t be surprised that this happened. It wasn’t like this was the first time Riki had gotten a girlfriend. He’d had plenty between the time you’d met him and now.

So, why did this feel so much worse than all the other times?

The title of the movie the boys selected went over your head. Your inner turmoil had the knots in your stomach tightening with every passing second. You weren’t sure whether to focus on the fact that Riki might expose your secret or that one of the prettiest girls in school had confessed to him. The choice wasn’t left to you as your mind alternated from thinking about the two problems periodically.

Your eyes were focused on the TV screen, but you were too busy thinking to see any of what was actually happening. Honestly, it was a good thing that Riki could potentially get into a relationship. If he did, it would be the thing to help her move on once and for all. Although watching him end up with someone else wouldn’t be painless, it would for the best. At least that’s what you tried to tell yourself.

Also, should Riki start to date Yura, then maybe he would be too caught up in his relationship to bring up your secret. Or maybe that was more of your wishful thinking since Riki was much more bothered about your jiujitsu lessons than you expected. You still couldn’t figure out why. It couldn’t be just because of his friendship to your brother. No matter how many times you went over it in your head, you couldn’t figure out why he cared so much.

Somehow, the movie ended before you could focus on it. With Sunoo telling Riki to pick another movie because he needed to use the restroom, you mindlessly wandered into the kitchen under the pretense of making more popcorn for the second movie. In reality, you needed to put some distance between you and Riki. Being alone with him wouldn’t do your resilience any good, and it definitely wasn’t helping your nerves. Unfortunately for you, nothing ever went as planned.

“We didn’t finish our conversation.”

Your hands stilled. Calm down. Breathe. You pressed the start button on the microwave before turning around to face Riki.

His thick eyebrow was raised, and that domineering look from before made an appearance once again. “Are you really going to keep doing jiujitsu even though you know your family won’t approve?”

You almost told him that he also did plenty of things that his family didn’t approve of, but you knew it wasn’t smart to get snarky with the person who knew your secret. Telling him the real reason you were practicing jiujitsu was out of the question. So, left without any other choice, you decided to bring up your friend in the hopes that he would leave it alone.

“It’s something fun to do with Heeseung.”

Astoundingly enough, Riki’s stern gaze became even more lethal. “Can’t you do something else with that idiot?” His voice rose unintentionally. “How can you want to keep learning jiujitsu just because that’s what—?”

“Shh!” You hissed in a panic, practically pouncing on Riki as you placed your hands over his mouth. “Sunoo will hear you!”

As you looked towards the living room worriedly, Riki found himself frozen in shock. Your soft hands pressing against his lips had his heart pounding harshly against his chest. From this close, he could see every single one of your eyelashes and the deep color of your pretty eyes. He couldn’t seem to form a coherent thought, only focusing on the close proximity. You smell invaded his senses and disarmed him completely.

When you looked back at Riki, you noticed he was looking at you strangely. It was then that you realized how close you two were. Literally chest to chest. You jumped back, feeling a bit of heat spread on your face.

“Sorry.” You apologized. “Just please don’t say anything.”

You rushed back into the living room before Riki could say anything else. All you could focus on was your erratic heartbeat that wouldn’t slow down. How could he affect you so much without even doing anything? It wasn’t fair because you were sure your presence didn’t have the same affect on him. The heat on your face hadn’t gone down even when Riki came back with the popcorn. If he noticed how flustered you looked, he didn’t mention it.

“Y/N.” Sunoo said as he walked back into the living room. “What’s this? Is it yours?”

Your eyes nearly popped out of their sockets when you saw Sunoo holding up your gi. You nearly choked, not knowing what to say since you were practically caught red-handed. Since when did he go through the laundry?

“That’s Danielle’s.” Riki said suddenly. “She asked me to get it for her when I came over.”

Without any hesitation, Sunoo handed the garments to Riki. While you were grateful that he hadn’t outed your secret, the nerves of him possibly changing his mind had you fidgeting uncomfortably as the two boys picked another movie. All throughout the comedy, you kept stealing glances at Riki. He didn’t look at you once, and you mentally cursed him for being so good at hiding his emotions.

When it was time for Riki to leave, you offered to see him out. Instead of walking him to the door, you stepped out into the cold night with him. You stood in front of Riki, nervously playing with the hem of her hoodie.

“Thank you for not telling my brother.”

“I’ll keep your secret.” Riki promised. “But you have to do something for me.”

You should’ve been suspicious at the tone he’d gotten, but you were too caught up with his promise not to tell anyone about your jiujitsu lessons. “What’s that?”

“I won’t tell anyone about what you’ve been up to as long as you stop going to that dojo and stop seeing Lee Heeseung.”

You thought he was joking until you that saw his somber expression didn’t change. Your eyebrows pulled together in confusion. She could understand the first part of his request, but what did you being friends with Heeseung have to do with anything?

“What? I can’t just—”

“Should I let your brother know what you’ve been doing, then?” Riki raised a challenging eyebrow at you.

Your shoulders sagged. “No.”

Riki held back a grin, but only just. “So, do we have a deal?”

“Yes.” You agreed reluctantly.

His signature smirk made an appearance. He lifted his hand and rested it on your head, softly ruffling the top of your hair. “Good. See you later.”

“Wait!” You called, pointing at the garments in his hand. “My gi!”

Riki glanced down at the clothing in his hands. Again, he looked up at her with that smirk of his. “This? I think I’ll hold onto it for the time being.” His smirk seemed mocking now, but it was still fatally attractive. Damn him. “Go back inside. You’ll catch a cold out here.”

And so, you watched Riki get on his motorcycle and take off with a sulky scowl on your face.

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“Y/N.”

Riki was leaning against his motorcycle as he beckoned you over to where he was. You hesitantly walked over, feeling your palms begin to perspire. Ever since you decided to go behind his back and still go to the dojo with Heeseung, you felt like you were on the brink of being caught.

“Where are you heading?”

To the dojo. “Oh... I was just going home since Minji and Danielle can’t hang out today.”

“Let’s get something to eat.” Riki’s words left no room for any disagreements. He handed you his spare helmet casually. “Hop on.”

You shook her head frantically. “Oh—no. You don’t have to. I’m not—”

“Come on.” He insisted, forcing the helmet into your hands. “Don’t you want your gi back?”

You scowled. “Fine.”

After putting on the helmet, you hesitantly got on the back of his motorcycle. It was embarrassing since you didn’t exactly fit on the edge of the bike, though, it mostly had to do with you sitting as far from him as the narrow seat would allow. You were sure you’d turn into putty if you had any physical contact with him.

“Hold on tight.”

You grimaced, torn between playing out the one fantasy that had been replaying through your head for months and your rational need to set boundaries so your feelings would stop growing. You awkwardly grabbed Riki’s shoulders, hoping that you wouldn’t fall off once he took off.

Riki laughed at your obvious unease. He decided to do a break check so you’d realize that not holding onto him wasn’t an option. Suddenly, you were flung forward. The front of your body collided with Riki’s firm back with a loud thud. For a moment, you thought you had hurt him until you saw his shoulders shaking with laughter. You glared at the back of his head. “Riki!”

“I told you to hold on.” Riki said, the lilt in his voice was teasing yet there was also a serious undertone to his words. “Do you want to fly off?”

You almost told him that you wouldn’t if he went slow enough. However, you kept your mouth shut and hoped your obsession wouldn’t grow as you hesitantly wrapped your arms around his torso. You gently rested your head against his back and closed your eyes. Just for a second, you told yourself. For a small moment, you would let go of the worries that burdened you and simply enjoy being close to the boy you liked.

Something unfamiliar tugged at Riki’s chest. His head shifted a little, wanting to catch a glimpse of the girl on his back. Your arms were secured around his waist and you were leaning on him, but he suddenly found that it wasn’t enough. Somehow he wanted you even closer. Riki cleared his throat quietly, pushing the unfamiliar thoughts out of his mind for the time being.

And so, you two sped off, neither of you noticing the boy who had been watching their entire interaction from afar.

You uncomfortably picked at the food in front of you. Had this been last year, you would’ve been overjoyed at sharing a meal with Riki (part of you still was), but now you couldn’t help but feel like this was all some sort of trap. Like he knew you had gone against your promis and was waiting on Sunoo to show up to tell him everything.

“Are you not hungry?” Riki wondered with a slight frown. “Bulgogi is your favorite.”

Honestly, you felt like puking up all the butterflies in her stomach, but he didn’t need to know that. “I’m not really hungry.” Your words were hardly convincing, but Riki seemed to believe you. “I got used to not eating as much because of jiujitsu.”

Riki’s jaw ticked in annoyance. “Is that really all it is?”

“Yeah.” You nodded your head. “I swear.”

That aggravated look he had been getting a lot lately found its way onto his face again. “Are you sure it’s not because you can’t see Heeseung?”

Your reluctance to answer the question had irritation crawling up his skin like a parasite. He knew that’s what it was. The shy look on your face was all the indication he needed to know you were thinking about that idiot. Riki only asked you because he hoped that you would tell him. Once you did, he would tell you that Heeseung wasn’t worth your time.

“It’s not like that.” You told him, confused that he was getting so worked up.

“Do you like him?” Riki demanded, needing to hear those words come out of your mouth. “Tell me the truth.”

His tone caught you off guard. You chewed on your bottom lip, wondering if you should mess with him a little since he took your stuff. Maybe it was petty of you, but you decided to do it anyway. You gave him a half-smile that you were sure looked more like a grimace. “That’s a secret.”

Riki was sure his jaw would snap at any moment from the amount of pressure he was putting on it. “Just know you’re out of his league. You’re way too pretty to settle for him of all people.”

You felt like your heart was ready to burst at any moment from how fast it was beating. Damn him. Damn your feelings for him. You were aware Riki only spoke his words out of kindness (and out of his dislike for Heeseung), but your dumb heart couldn’t tell the difference. It was clear that Riki didn’t see you the way he saw Song Yura. To him, you would always be Sunoo’s sister. But for a brief moment, you allowed herself to believe that he sincerely meant what he said.

Your shocked gaze had Riki coughing nervously. It wasn’t the first time he called you pretty, but this time it felt different from all the previous times. His words seemed more... intimate, somehow.

You didn’t realize you were full-on staring until the chime of a text notification pulled you out of the trance that was Riki’s intense gaze. Your jaw nearly dropped when she saw Heeseung’s name on the screen. He didn’t text you very often, and when he did it was only ever to tell you he wouldn’t be at the dojo.

Where are you?

You briefly glanced at Riki before quickly typing out a reply.

I’m at the corner restaurant near the dojo. I’ll be there soon.

You put your phone back on the table, feeling like there was an impending doom waiting for you. There was this inkling you had that nothing good could come from Heeseung’s ominous message. Even so, you chose to ignore it for the time being.

“So.” Riki cleared his throat, not knowing why he suddenly felt so shy. “What’s so great about your little crush, anyway?”

You contemplated your next words. Riki probably thought you were going to tell him about Heeseung, but he could never know what you were about to say was all about him. It was the only opportunity you would have to tell Riki how you really felt about him.

“Ever since we met, he’s been nothing but kind to me. He sees me for who I am.” The corner of your mouth lifted a bit. “Some people think he’s a jerk, but he isn’t really. He’s actually really sweet and caring.”

Riki’s expression hardened. Sweet? Caring? Yeah, right. He was sure that he could be much more sweet than Heeseung who had the emotional range of a fish.

“What about you, Riki?” You questioned despite knowing his answers would only hurt your feelings. “Everyone’s talking about how much you like Yura. What kind of person is she?”

Riki raised his eyebrows, baffled. “What? I don’t—”

He cut himself off when he saw a familiar (and unwelcome) presence approach the table. If you thought his gaze was harsh before, it didn’t compare to the murderous look that crossed his face in that instant. You followed his gaze, mouth dropping open in surprise when you saw Heeseung standing about two feet away from the table.

“H-Heeseung?” You choked out, unable to believe that he was actually there.

“I got worried when you didn’t meet me at the dojo like we’d planned.” He said like his words weren’t the equivalent of dropping a bomb of chaos.

You could’ve choked Heeseung right then and there. What the hell did he think he was doing? You gave him a look, one that you hoped he would understand. Either he didn’t notice it or he didn’t care. You were willing to bet it was the latter.

“What are you doing here?” Riki’s voice was deceptively calm. “Don’t tell me you’re following her.”

In the few times you witnessed the two boys around each other, you knew it always got ugly fast. You could see where this encounter was heading, and it was heading there quick. Luckily for you, your saint of a brother decided to call you right then.

“Sunoo!” You hastily answered your phone. “What’s up?”

“Mom wants us home for dinner. She made ribs.”

“Okay. I’ll be there right away.” You hung up before he could say anything else. You scrambled to grab your bag. “I have to go—family emergency. See you guys later!”

With that, you ran away from the uncomfortable scene that was unfolding without looking back once.

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You waited at the front of your school anxiously. Riki hadn’t mentioned anything to Sunoo yet, and you were hoping you could convince him not to with a bit of begging. The seconds ticked by, and while you still hadn’t seen his familiar motorcycle, you saw the person who had dug you into a deeper hole.

“Lee Heeseung!” You hissed as you pulled him to the side. “What was that stunt you pulled yesterday? You know I can’t have anyone find out that I’m learning jiujitsu.”

Heeseung looked unfazed as ever. “I just want to know what you’re doing. You said you were trying to get over Nishimura, but you were having a meal with him.”

Your right eye twitched. “That’s because he said he would give me back my gi!” You whisper-yelled, wanting to pull on the ends of your hair in frustration. “Which he didn’t, thanks to you.”

“I also wanted to ask him why he has a problem with us being friends. It’s not like you’re his little sister.”

You’re not sure why that made your anger simmer to a simple irritation. Also, Heeseung did sort of have a point. You laughed incredulously, shoving his shoulder a bit. “You’re so immature, Hee. You know he has a problem with it because he doesn’t like you.”

Heeseung highly doubted the only reason Riki didn’t want you two hanging out was because of their mutual dislike for each other. He knew that you probably wouldn’t figure that out any time soon because you were too overwhelmed with your own feelings, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t find out the truth on your behalf.

Your smile was quick to slip off your face when you saw Song Yura staring your way. The heartbroken look she had her on her face caught you by surprise. Even worse, Riki was standing directly behind her. You felt herself panic. If there was any hope that your begging would convince him not to say anything, it was gone now. Now you were certain that you wouldn’t be able to crawl out of the hole you had dug yourself in.

Riki on the other hand could only look on with a glare. He had never planned on exposing your secret. It was only a pretense to get you to stop hanging around that prick, but now he could truly see that your feelings were stronger than your fear of getting in trouble. He had suspected that was the case for some time now, yet it still made him feel sick.

Why did it have to be Lee Heeseung of all people? Why couldn’t it be... anyone else?

Riki turned on his heel and walked in the opposite direction, not knowing what to make of the heaviness in his chest.

taglist: @hoondiors @blurryriki @miiequalsx

#hooniblr.doc #niki x reader #enhypen x reader #niki imagines #enhypen x you #riki x reader #niki fanfic #enhypen fic #enhypen angst #enhypen au #enhypen fanfiction #enha angst #enha fluff #enhypen fluff #riki fluff #enha au

[mecachrome]

landoscar ao3 stats — 2023 overview

notes

retrieved ~sometime in march 2024

methodology: scraped metadata for every fic in the landoscar tag and...... that's it. however one important constraint is that all temporal data is date updated (not posted), so the above timeline isn't exactly a true representation of fic growth but rather how many fics were last-updated at that time. of course this is still its own reflection of fandom health in a way since dead fandoms don't update old fic but well... it's just not quite the same!

this is just info about general trends, fic content, tags etc... so nothing about kudos/comments or any authors specifically

i decided to focus solely on fics last-updated in 2023 (unless otherwise mentioned) because i wanted a tidy set that i can maybe compare & contrast in a year's time, because i expect a lot of details to look different then (tho as stated above this set isn't exactly static... 🤷‍♀️)

ngl i had to re-scrape a bunch of times because i forgot about it for like 3 weeks and then there were 100 new fics 😭 so if there are some minor discrepancies across the post it's because of that halfskh.

also i wanted to include more global comparisons (aka how 814 stack up against the f1 rpf tag in general), but this is also considerably difficult in some contexts since i can't exactly scrape 31,000+ fics can i... or i didn't even want to entertain the thought of trying to do so!!!

why did i do this? who knows.

anyway here's some viz T__T

ship growth

as evidenced in the opening graph, landoscar have been a very fast-growing ship over the past year — although interestingly enough they didn't really start growing substantially until july / the ~better half~ of the 2023 season. here are two views showing their "growth" (by date updated) alongside two other ships on the fringes of the f1 rpf top 10 (sebchal & galex):

landoscar are very much on-track to surpass them and officially enter the top 10 soon, likely before mid-april ❗️ :o

ship characteristics

onto the ship content — another thing i was mildly curious about was how landoscar differs in certain areas from other f1 ships, or the f1 rpf "global" average you could say. for example, here's a breakdown of rating popularity in their ao3 tag:

seeing as explicit is their most common rating, and that i don't necessarily expect this to be true for all ships/fandoms, i compared these percentages with the general f1 rpf tag to see whether some ratings are more commonly represented in 814 fic than average, which produced interesting results:

do lando ships simply skew more HornyTM in general? is it oscar? a secret third thing??? who knows... actually i think it would be fun to do more analysis in this direction but that can wait for another time!!!

similarly i also wanted to see which ships are the most "public" on ao3, as in have the highest share of fic that isn't user-locked... i will refrain from peppering in my feelings about the 4th wall too heavy-handedly but i was curious to see whether some sort of perhaps... er, generational gap (?) of sorts between ships that are more public vs. not could be identified. however i don't pretend to have any takeaways from this LOL i conclude absolutely nothing. (for ref landoscar is currently 72% public, vs. a global avg of 63%)

note that this graph is current stats, not filtered for 2023

looking at relationship tags, i also wanted to know whether landoscar suffer noticeably from Second-Ship Syndrome, so i tallied the first-tagged ship of every fic to find out. i know this doesn't necessarily mean that it's always the "main" ship but it's a good enough approximation. the results were quite positive!

filtered to top ships with count of >1 only

i then also calculated the number of ships tagged for each fic to discern the profile of multi-shipping in 814 ficdom; i did have to do a little bit of string standardization (all instances of implied / background / hinted collapsed to hinted for simplicity's sake + removal of other redundancies), but otherwise i left everything mostly untouched.

as you can see, landoscar also have a fairly promising amount of OTP: TRUE fic:

by the time you get to the fics with 10+ ships tagged, landoscar are less likely to be the primary ship, which makes sense just on a basic statistical level... this is also a very small sample size though

i also lazily tallied the 10 most common ships that weren't NOR/PIA or NOR & PIA to diff their shares of the 814 tag vs. of the general f1 rpf tag, to see which other pairings are more represented in the 814 tag than on average (because lestappen are the most popular by pure count but this is also true of fandom in general, so it would be a misrepresentation to say that their popularity is out of the ordinary):

maxiel's gap isn't really that surprising since i think that, generationally, in terms of when both pairings were teammates there is quite a gap; with carlando—actually let me tally this again but including all instances of "implied" and "past" as being part of the same ship, since that's how ao3 tag-wrangles as well:

Aha ! obviously as a direct ship there is competition between 814 and other lando or oscar ships, but this difference is somewhat less pronounced once we include all formats. tbh none of this really means anything but i thought i'd add it anyway... (it's also very possible that there are several errors in this, in which case my b 😔)

before we move on to additional tags, there are a few more basic characteristics of 814 fic we can calculate. i realize i never offered an overview of Super Basic Stats, so here are a few:

plus, looking at word counts, here is a distribution of those in 2023-updated fic, which shows that a majority of 814 fics were under the 5k mark:

85% of landoscar fics were under 10k & nearly 97% under 25k

i don't really have any reason to believe that landoscar's wc stats differ significantly from average ? so this is kind of just Data To Have Data, and it most likely reflects normal ao3 trends in general... but i thought i'd include it anyway because i already made it lol. similarly, here are word count distributions but stratified by rating:

& same info but heat map view:

i feel like this is also probably something you'd find across fandom in general — that gen fic is likely to have a higher share of under 1k works, since Building Up to sexual content often takes... Literal & Metaphorical Foreplay ! and the longer a fic is the more opportunities an author has to include a sex scene or other explicit content (ofc, not necessarily just porn but also graphic violence & so on). but i thought this was fun to visualize haha

additional tags & aus?

back in my old f1 rpf stats post, i made a table comparing fluff/angst "ratios" (not exactly a direct ratio because of how tag wrangling works, but an approximation) of the most popular f1 ships, and now that landoscar are somewhat popular i thought i'd first do an update:

also current data, not 2023 to make things easier

just like before, simi are one of the most fluffy ships and brocedes are by far the most angsty, but it's interesting to see 814 also extremely high up on the charts, with far and away the lowest % of angst. will be exciting 2 see how that holds or changes as the seasons progress !

finally, i also wanted to do a bit of au/additional tag analysis because you can kind of see this when you use additional filters on ao3 but the previews are limited and get bogged down by the prevalence of *checks notes* Fluff, Angst, PWP, Anal Sex and what have you. which are nice stats to have and all but what of the rest !

disclaimer that the set for these tables is a biiiit outdated because by the time i'd wrangled everything i was like I Am Not Changing It Again. unfortunately i clean my data with shoddy queries and regex functions in googsheetz...

there were 48 tags with at least 10 instances from 2023 fics, shown below, with ones that are (some ~vaguely) nsfw in red just to kind of get a rough sense of which tags get commonly used in M/E fic:

getting a bit too much into small sample size / specific fic territory so if you're an author i sincerely apologize for that... do not mean 2 put u on blast... TT__TT but i also tried to tally the most popular aus people write for 814, which is a bit dubious because people tag in really different ways and i had to accommodate for a lot of string formats but ... it's close enough ! (?)

i feel like this is very little interesting info but idk what else to add so i will stop here for now... well!!! if you made it to the end i hope u learned something or even vaguely enjoyed reading T__T and most of all thank you :')

#*m #landoscar #in a sense 😔 #tfw don't have a tableau license so i live life on the edge across multiple unsaved desktop public files...... #if ur interested in anything specific pls lmk before my computer inevitably Dies and deletes everything...! #this is so useless nsdflshdfh. Anyway

[lirational]

Yandere Shalom x Chief reader?

Yandere!Shalom x Chief!Reader

Warnings: Yandere behavior, obsession, stalking, read at your own risk.

Dark content under the cut!

SFW:

Actually didn’t start big. Hell, she even hides it well. You won’t notice at first, after all, she was an expert of hiding her emotions. When you meet, her gaze will linger for a moment longer, her touch imparting a coldness that only lasted for less than a second before she pulled back, her demeanor as statue-still and perfect as usual.

Her emotions is most prominent in her gaze. Literally, if you’re not within conversation range it’s hard to know what she’s thinking and even if you are it’s difficult to really discern her thoughts. She’s a master of looking at you then right when you realize it and look to confirm, she seemed to be busy with something else.

Shalom will offer to accompany you to interrogations. This is done under the pretense of ensuring your safety (which is kind of correct) even though you don’t trust that damned device of hers, but, it’s also an excuse to observe you… which you certainly notice.

She fell for you, and she fell hard, but those feelings of hers cannot be overtly expressed, or the people behind her will find her defective.

She writes her diary like it was an investigation report, hiding personal tidbits about you under observational data. There are complicated codes of written material about your preferences, interests, and even daily activities, and as much as she detested it, the sinners you seem to like. What was it that makes them attractive to you? She can do the same, and she will do it better, and she won’t have their flaws.

Her passion is hidden beneath what passes as fake smiles and perfect disguises. You will be watched, and the only hints of her feelings will show through only when the Schorl is sent away. Expect her to sometimes send the thing away and use those minutes to, ahem, get you up to speed with her feelings. No confessions are made, but the fervor with which she expressed her desire more than make up for it.

NSFW:

She wants you to feel good, sure, but on the other hand? She wants to be in control of every aspect. She will tease you and won’t mind leaving you teetering on the edge for hours until you do perfectly, exactly as she asks, which is quite an ordeal thanks to her damned fingers. She’s so good at pleasing you, part of you wonder how much she actually knows. What kind of relationship did you both share in the past?

When she bottoms, she wants you to serve her, expect her to be teasing, playing with the remote that controls the device nestled between your legs while you eat her out, playing with the speeds to reward or punish you depending on your performance. Your fingers are the perfect length to press at that spongy, sensitive spot inside her, and she’ll save that for when both of you were isolated from everything else - including her Schorl.

I think she likes to leave back scratches. It’s pretty discreet and can be covered up with clothes, keeping you both professional for when you have to return to your duties. Shalom usually would take a sharp inhale seeing your scratched-up back, though, and at the very, very rare times she could afford to slip up, she’ll indulge herself and fuck you a second time. Perhaps she’ll even use her strap, the toy rarely seeing action save for rare circumstances.

I believe she has the ability to actually make a lot of things sound dirty, like damn, that voice—

#path to nowhere #path to nowhere x reader #ptn x reader #path to nowhere headcanons #ptn shalom x reader

[btsficsandsuch]

Hi, I wanted to request a BTS × 8th member reader where they are not welcoming of her at the start and are hostile towards her but she is not treated by the management properly too . With a happy ending

I hope this is okay!

Warning: Swearing, Mentions of extreme dieting, Hints to physical abuse

Going To Be Better

“This is so stupid. We don’t need an 8th member.”, Yoongi spat. “I agree. Things are great the way they are.”, Taehyung added. Bang PD nodded in agreement but his words spoke differently, “I understand. It’s a big change but I think it’s going to be a good change. Bringing on this new member will surely bring in new fans. Just give Y/N a chance. She’s really talented. Have I ever done anything to try and jeopardize your careers?” The boys all nodded in understanding but the mood in the room was still tense.

To say you were nervous was an understatement. You were currently standing outside one of the recording studios trying to work up the courage to knock. When you finally were able to give three soft knocks you waited in silence. After a couple more knocks you were still met with more silence. Thinking maybe you didn’t hear them say to come in you gently pushed open the door and were met with three pairs of eyes staring at you.

“What the fuck? Don’t you know how to knock?”, Yoongi spoke. “Alright that’s enough hyung.”, Namjoon replied. Hoseok just sat there staring at you. Before anyone else could speak Bang PD walked in with a smile, “Oh I see you’ve met already. Everyone this is Y/N. I asked her to meet here to work on some new songs with you guys. I know I can count on you guys to treat her well.” Just as quickly as he appeared you watched him walk off typing away on his cell phone while you desperately wished he would stay. “Great, so they really weren’t kidding about this new eighth member?”, you heard someone speak and that’s when you noticed Jungkook, Taehyung, Jin, and Jimin sat in a corner of the room.

Trying to be kind you put on a smile and tried to introduce yourself, “Hello, like he said my name is Y/N. I was a trainee wit-“ but you were cutoff. “We don’t really want to hear your life story right now. Let’s see if you’re actually as talented as they say you are.”, Namjoon spoke. Shyly you made your way into the recording booth taking the lyric sheet from Jimin. A few moments later the melody began and you sang your heart out wanting to impress them. You honestly impressed yourself with how good you sounded.

Hearing a beep you looked over and saw that Yoongi was about to speak. Your heart sank a little when instead of praise you received nothing but criticism. Trying to hold back the tears you sang through the verse six more times before they were happy with it. Thankful when they finally told you to go home you couldn’t wait to get out of there. This definitely wasn’t going as you had hoped.

Over the next few weeks you practiced and practiced not wanting to disappoint. Big Hit officially announced you as the new 8th member of BTS and you were very well received by the fans and media. They said it was refreshing and they were excited to see how this progressed. Unfortunately the rest of the group still hadn’t come around to the idea. They weren’t as harsh with their words as they were at the start but they still kept their distance. Jungkook was the only one who was somewhat opening up to you. It probably had something to do with being closer in age to each other.

Today you were getting a crash course on the choreography. Hoseok felt that you weren’t quite getting it so he wanted you to get extra practice. “Y/N, I know it’s difficult but you should be going a little quicker. Is there something I can do to help you?”, he asked. You couldn’t discern if he was actually trying to be helpful or if he just wanted to rub it in. At this point you didn’t really care. The two of you had been at it for several hours now and you were exhausted. It didn’t help that it was already 9:00pm and you were currently functioning on a cup of black coffee and half a banana that you had for breakfast. One of the mangers had told you that you looked pretty chubby in your stage outfits and suggested you loose some weight. Even though you felt like passing out you smiled at Hoseok, “I’m sorry Hobi. I’ll try harder.” He nodded and you two ran through the choreography again.

Two weeks later you guys had your first official performance as a group of eight. Everyone was sitting backstage relaxing when one of the managers came walking through the door doing an inspection of outfits. When he got to you he looked you up and down and you knew it wasn’t going to be positive.

The closer he got the more you flinched trying to turn away. Jimin definitely noticed your behavior and knew something was going on. “Y/N, I thought we told you to loose weight. It doesn’t look like you’ve lost a single pound.”, he asked. You could feel your throat drying up. “I’ve been dieting and I’m constantly working on choreography and I go to the gym in what little spare time I have. If I eat any less I won’t be eating at all.”, you whispered. The manager scoffed, “Well then I suggest you stop eating in general. You might be talented but your visuals will bring the group down.” As you watched him turn and walk away you could feel seven pairs of eyes on you. The last couple months finally caught up to you and you couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. “Well you guys get what you’ve wanted this whole time. You can remain a group of seven. I quit.”, you said before walking out the door letting it slam behind you.

Thankfully you were able to find an empty room down the hall that you walked into so you could have some privacy. Sitting on the floor you released all the pent-up frustration and hurt that you had been feeling over the last couple months. You were so enthralled in your sorrows that you didn’t hear the door open causing you to jump when you felt someone grab your hand. You weren’t expecting Jimin to be standing there with a sad look in his eyes.

Before either of you could speak the door opened up and the other six members came following in. They all sat in a circle in front of you not speaking. Part of you wanted to tell them off and let them know how much they hurt you, part of you wanted to hear them out and maybe get an apology, and another part of you wanted to get up and walk out not giving them another minute of your time. Before you could decide Namjoon spoke, “Y/N we owe you a major apology. I know simply saying sorry isn’t enough but we’ve been really hard on you and not welcoming.” Yoongi added, “Yeah I’ve been particularly rough on you. It’s just been a big change that they threw at us and we weren’t expecting it. We handled it like spoiled children instead of responsible adults.” “Please don’t quit Y/N. You’re so talented and you do add something special to the group. We know it’s going to take time but we do want to make things right with you.”, Jin said with smile. Drying off what was left of the tears on your cheeks you smiled, “I would like to try and work on our relationship but unfortunately I don’t think I can continue. I’m not going to starve myself and diet like this. I’m not going to be treated like dirt by management. That’s not healthy. I’ve realized I’m better than that.” Namjoon nodded, “Let us take care of that Y/N. We’ll make sure he doesn’t bother you any more.” The guys helped you get up off the ground and each gave you a hug before walking out the door. Jimin stayed behind a little longer. Taking your hand in his he spoke, “Y/N I just wanted you to know that you’re beautiful the way that you are and you don’t have to change. That’s something that took me a long time to learn in this industry. I’m genuinely sorry for how we treated you and I’m sorry that we let management treat you like that too. We swore we would protect any new idols but we failed you. We’ll make sure you’re taken care of from now on.” “Thank you Jimin. I do appreciate that.”, you smiled and led him out into the hallway.

Thankfully the concert went off without a hitch. You hit all of your notes and we’re on point with the choreography. The fans also seemed to really love you. After the show Taehyung invited you back to the dorm for their post concert routine of ordering a ton of takeout and then crashing on the couch watching a movie. Things still felt a little awkward but you appreciated that they were trying to make things right and everyone knew it would take time.

The following day you made your way to the recording studio when you heard someone call your name. Turning around you saw Bang PD smiling at you as he invited you into his office. “Y/N, I had a long meeting with the boys this morning. They told me what happened yesterday with the manager and how he treated you. You should’ve come to me a while ago and let me know that this was going on. I just wanted to let you know that the manager in question has been dealt with and is no longer an employee of this company. Should this happen again please bring it to my attention immediately.”, he advised. “Thank you.”, was all you could say feeling a wash of relief that you don’t have to deal with this any more. After giving a quick goodbye you walked out of his office and went back over to the studio knocking on the door and waiting to be let in. A few moments later Yoongi greeted you with a smile, “Y/N come in! I’ve got a bunch of new songs we need to work on. I think your voice is going to add something great.” Happily you walked in a greeting Namjoon who was sat at the control table before taking a seat next to Jimin who reached over and gently gave your knee a squeeze reminding you that things were going to be better.

#bts #bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts imagines #bts angst #Jin #Yoongi #Namjoon #hoseok #Jimin #taehyung #jungkook #jhope #suga #rm #v #bts x 8th member #8th member of bts

[cy-cyborg]

Disability 101: The language of Disability

Trigger Warning: this post contains discussions of disability slurs (specifically the C and R slurs), and the history of disabled people's use in medical experimentation, including specific (but brief) examples.

Most of the content on my blog is aimed specifically at authors, artists and other creatives, but I've been noticing for a while now, that many of the people who come here to learn about writing and designing better and more compassionate disabled representation are often missing what I would consider to be pretty fundamental knowledge of the disabled community, or have gotten said information from a questionable source, for example, through corporate sensitivity training, who's given them just straight-up incorrect information. This isn't surprising, nor is it really the fault of the people seeking to learn more, rather, it's because of the way society at large talks about (or I suppose, doesn't talk about) disability. However this lack of foundational understanding often leads to creators accidentally including harmful tropes, using damaging or unnecessarily coded language or just including misinformation about our community into their works, often in ways that are quite hard to change by the time they realise there's an issue.

But before we continue:

The disability community is massive and we have a lot of history most people are totally unaware of which influences a lot of these fundamentals. It doesn't help that there are a lot of "allies" to our community who completely ignore and speak over us, many of whom have bigger platforms that actual disabled people, so their advice is seen and shared by more people, muddying the waters even further and making it difficult to discern what is and isn't "good information". Because of that, I understand that it can be hard to know where to start, so while most of my content is dedicated to specifically talking about disability representation in media, and how creators can include better representation in their own works, I also want to take some time to talk about some of the fundamental information about the disabled community I feel everyone (creator or not) should know.

Today I'm going to start on what I think trips people up the most when they're first trying to learn: The language surrounding disability. What terms we (generally) prefer, what terms to avoid, all that. I don't think this is necessarily the most important thing to know right off the bat, but it is probably one of the topics non-disabled people are the most confidently incorrect about, and where general misinformation is the most rampant.

Disclaimer: Before we go ahead, it's important to remember that the disabled community is not a monolith, especially so when we are talking about something like language and preferred terms. This post is designed to be a starting off point, not a rigid set of rules or all-encompassing guide. Different individuals may prefer different terms, possibly even ones listed in this article as words to avoid. Articles like this should always be taken as a general guideline but you should always be respectful of an individual's preference and refer to them how they have asked you to refer to them, even if it goes against general advice you've been given. However, it's important to bear in mind that just because that individual has a preference for a less popular term or even a term others find offensive, doesn't mean every disabled person is ok with it. It's also important to consider that different communities, cultures and countries, as well as people who speak different languages or even dialects of the same language, will have different general preferences, and so it is crucial to do further research on your own.

Disability and disabled are not dirty Words, it's ok to say it

If you grew up in the 1990's or later, like I did, you very likely heard words like "special needs," "differently-abled," "Special education" (often shortened to SPED). There's a very good chance that if you worked in education, healthcare (especially for children), with some disability charities or even if you were the parent of a disabled kid during this time, you were likely told to use these terms as a replacement for words like disabled, because "disability" and specific terms like "autism," "amputee," "downs syndrome," "paraplegic," etc put the focus on the things the person doesn't have or can't do. Calling them "disabled" implies there is something wrong with them, whereas these alternatives put a focus on the idea that folks with these conditions are "different, not less". At least, that's what a lot of people are told.

This is what we call coded language, and it's an issue because a lot of disabled people despise it. There are exceptions, of course, I know a few people who are indifferent, but I honestly can't recall anyone who was disabled themselves who preferred it outside of very young children who's parents insisted it was better (though most chose to move away from it as they got older).

But why? well, because of something that I'm sure you'll notice is going to be a pattern throughout this post: we didn't create these terms, and they weren't made for us, not really.

Most disabled people don't really see using the term "disabled" or any of the modern diagnostic terms (for the most part) as an issue. Yes, many do, by definition, focus on things we don't have, can't do or might struggle with; the definition of an amputee is someone who is missing a limb, the definition of paraplegia is someone who has paralysis in their lower body and legs, meaning they might not be able to or might struggle to move them. The definition of a disability is a little more complex and varies from country to country, but the American CDC defines it as "Any condition of the body or mind that makes it more difficult for the person with the condition to do certain activities and interact with the world around them."

These definitions sound negative, but it's not a bad thing to acknowledge someone doesn't have something most other people possess, or struggles with things others don't. It doesn't make someone "less" to acknowledge they have a barrier others don't. It's just acknowledging a part of our lived experience and acknowledging that our lives, because of these barriers, can sometimes look different, in both big and small ways.

However, a lot of people who are not used to being around disabled people get deeply uncomfortable with this, and this refusal to use straight-forward words like disabled is a symptom of that. This discomfort comes, in my experience, from a lack of understanding of disability as a whole, and potentially misplaced sympathy. They don't know how we do things they see as important, how we could do without the things they have, or what technology or services is available to help us bridge those gaps. This unknown makes a lot of non-disabled people scared, uncomfortable or makes them sad for us, even when it's not necessary. They see that we can't do something they can, like move our legs for example, and make a series of assumptions based on incomplete information. They imagine a life like ours and don't know how it could possibly be fulfilling, because they are missing so many vitally important pieces of information, making our lives look empty, bland and sad.

They don't have the full picture, but ironically, this discomfort stops them from learning more. If you go into a topic like this, assuming it will be depressing and bleak, why would you want to double check? For many, the fact that it doesn't take much for them to become disabled too adds to that feeling of discomfort and fear, so they turn away and try to pretend we're just "different" and insist on replacing the "scary" words that acknowledge the challenges and barriers they too will have to face if they become like us with things that comfort themselves, not us.

All of this is especially important to remember in the cases of disabled people who are severely limited by their disabilities (whether it be due to the disability itself, or the lack of accommodations for it) and who's disabilities do have negative impacts on their lives. It's important to acknowledge that for some of us, the negative stigma around our disabilities is mostly misinformation and an incomplete picture, like I mentioned before, that altering how something is done or approaching things differently can completely remove those barriers for some of us (e.g. like building ramps instead of stairs), but it won't for everyone. terms like "differently abled" completely ignore and dismiss the experiences of this part of the community, all they do is remind the person that you are uncomfortable acknowledging what they are dealing with. "disabled" on the other hand is inclusive of us both.

Person-first vs Identity-first language

Another aspect of the language surrounding disability that causes confusion in a lot of non-disabled people is whether or not you should be using person-first or identity-first language.

Person-first is where you put the person before the name of the disability, for example "Person with a disability," "Person with autism," "person with amputations," etc. Identity-first language, on the other hand, is where you put the person's disabled identity first, so "disabled person," or in the case of some disabilities, you might drop the need to say person at all, so it would be "autistic" and "amputee".

Unlike the last section, the answer to which one you should be using varies a lot on who you ask, and both types of language have their own benefits.

Person-First

Chances are, if you've done any kind of work that would have put you into contact with disabled people in the last few decades or so, you were instructed to use person-first language. weather you are a journalist, a doctor, an educator, a government employee, or were part of many, many other industries, chances are that you were taught to use it.

The reason for this is that, before the introduction and widespread use of person-first language to describe disability, non-disabled people were much less kind in how they spoke about us. Many people openly used slurs, even in formal settings, or referred to us (individually) as "the disabled," "the wheelchair," "the blind," "the downs syndrome," etc. e.g. "the wheelchair over there asked for assistance," or "I'm seeing the downs syndrome at 3pm."

This was especially prevalent in the medical field, with healthcare professionals often exclusively referring to their patients in this (or similar) ways, refusing to acknowledge their personhood, the value of their lives or their lived experiences beyond their disabilities. The medical field often mistreated and abused disabled patients, and before the introduction of laws protecting the rights of disabled people, this was not only completely legal to do, but was sometimes encouraged. On top of general mistreatment, disabled people, specifically, those being kept in mental institutions, asylums, and other places dedicated to their "care" (or containment) were often used as human test subjects.

There are countless examples throughout history, such as when Dr Henry Heiman infected two boys with gonorrhoea without their consent or the consent of their parents in New York in 1895, one of whom was only four years old with epilepsy and the other was 16 years old with unspecified intellectual disabilities. Dr Thomas Francis infected multiple disabled individuals with influenza in 1941, and George L. Fitch who infected six children under 12 living in the "Hawaiian Leper Colony" with what he thought was Syphilis in 1833. The personhood of the victims of these studies were often ignored or downplayed, so it's not too surprising then, that when the disabled community was finally able to start pushing back against their mistreatment in the late 1900's (The specific decade varies depending on which country you're talking about), they advocated for language that put their humanity and personhood first and foremost, making it much harder for people to forget that they were, in fact, still people and deserved to be treated as such.

Today, person-first is still preferred by parts of the community who still face more dehumanisation than most in the disabled community. for example, it's still very popular among people with downs syndrome. Of course, generalisations are just that: generalisations. There are many people with disabilities who experience very extreme dehumanisations, and still prefer not to use person-first, and vice versa.

There are also a number of disabilities that simply don't have names that work using identity-first language for grammatical reasons, such as people with ADHD (though some online communities use "ADHDers" in more informal settings) or people with BPD. Most often these are the disabilities who's names are acronyms, and so person-first is still used, but more out of necessity than genuine preference.

Identity-First

Identity first isn't technically newer than person-first language, but it's use, and it's name, has changed connotations recently as it has begun to become popular in parts of the community.

You see, for some people, their disabilities are an important part of their sense of self, or at the very least, their disabilities are so impactful on their lives, for better or worse, that they feel like they would be a completely different person without them. This is what we mean when we talk about disability as an identity, and what we mean when we say identity-first.

For some folks who prefer identity-first language, they feel like person-first is trying to distance them from their disability, often for the comfort of non-disabled people. It makes a disability sound like something you carry with you and that you could simply leave at the door if you could, not an important part of yourself. It sounds as strange as saying "A person with creativity" as opposed to "a creative person" or, to compare it to another identity of my own, "a person with gayness" instead of "a gay person".

This particular reason is popular among communities such as some parts of the autistic community, as autism impacts their brain, their personality, their interests, the way they communicate with others and more. If they were suddenly "cured" of their autism, they would be totally different people, and so they feel "autistic" is a better descriptor, as they simply can't be separated from their disability. It's a part of what makes them who they are. This is also popular among people born with their disabilities who have only ever known life that way, or those who have had their disabilities for a long time. Their disability, weather directly (such as autism) or indirectly (due to how people treat them, what opportunities or lack there of were available to them, the people they interacted with, etc) has impacted them so much that, once again, if they weren't disabled, they would have become a wholly different person.

Some prefer identity-first because they feel that they should not have to remind others that they are people. They feel it is unnecessary, and that if you need to be constantly reminded that any group of people you don't belong to are still people just because they are different to you, that's honestly just concerning. And then there are some in the community, who just prefer it because it's usually shorter and easier to say.

There's also a lot of people who don't really care either way. Personally, I fall into this category for the most part, as do most people I know. while I do lean more towards identity-first because it's easier to write and say, and because I agree, I think we as a society shouldn't need to be reminded of anyone's personhood so frequently in 2024, I also recognise that unfortunately, some people do still need that reminder.

It's important to note, that calling someone "the wheelchair," "the disabled," "The autistic," etc is not identity-first language, it's typically under the categorisation of objectifying language and you'll be hard-pressed to find anyone who likes or prefers that. Using identity-first language for these disabilities might look like, "Wheelchair user," "autistic/disabled person" or "that person is disabled/autistic". A good rule-of-thumb is to just avoid using "the" when referring to individuals or even groups of people (e.g. the disabled, the elderly, the gays etc).

Slurs

I also want to talk about slurs briefly. A slur, in this context, is defined by Merriam Webster as "an insulting or disparaging remark or innuendo," though it is often used specifically when referring to words of particularly strong impact, often with a lot of history behind why they have that impact.

For the disability community, many (though not all) of our slurs are somewhat unique, in that they were once considered medical diagnoses. While a lot of people do make this argument disingenuously, I do believe there are some people who are genuinely confused about this, which is why I quickly want to bring it up.

Words like "cripple," "retard," and many, many more I am not comfortable saying for a variety of reasons, all started as actual diagnoses. In fact, several of the sources I used even use them in this way, such as the sites and books I found talking about the two boys Henry Heinman infected almost always referring to them as being "mentally retarded" or "experiencing mental retardation".

I've talked about "cripple" specifically in detail before, but in all of these cases, the word went from a neutral descriptor (at least, in theory) to something that was used in increasingly negative ways, both by the medical professionals diagnosing people with these terms, and the general public. In medical settings, these words were often used to justify the horrible treatment directed at people with disabilities (Like we discussed before), and even after protections were put into place, the language kept its associations. In the general public, these words started being used as insults directly, both directed at disabled people and in general. If you went to school in the 2000's, you probably heard "retard" being used as an insult on the playground as a replacement for stupid or ridiculous. You can see how, when a whole generation starts associating a diagnosis with "ridiculous" it starts to become an issue. This would then feed back into how the terms were used medically. As much as we'd like to think of doctors and healthcare professionals as being unaffected by cultural norms, history has proven time and time again that this was not the case. If you'd grown up hearing a real diagnosis as a synonym for an insult, it's not going to make your opinion of the patients you're giving that title to particularly positive unless you're going to spend a lot of time deconstructing those implications, which, in my experience, many do not.

So yes, even though these might have been acceptable terms once, their use in overwhelmingly negative ways has caused a lot of disabled people to become deeply uncomfortable with them, and they have since been deemed slurs.

Of course, not every slur related to disability came from outdated diagnostic terms. The M-slur used against little people, for example, originated during the times where little people's only option for employment was in freak-shows and other demeaning rolls, such as being kept as pets by nobility. The M-slur was used to compare them to a type of small, annoying fly, a midge, as a way to further humiliate and dehumanise them.

There have been movements that attempted or are currently in the process of reclaiming some of these slurs, with notable examples like the "cripplepunk" community for physically disabled people (They do, however, ask that able-bodied people call the movement "c-punk" instead). Though other words like "retard" are more debated, and many people with intellectual and cognitive disabilities (who the slur was usually directed at) feel it is too early to start that process, or feel it should not be reclaimed at all. At the end of the day, it is the people with the disabilities impacted by these terms who get to decide if, how and when a slur is reclaimed, not outside forces and wider society.

Focusing back in on authors and creatives for a moment, if you're writing a disabled character, but you yourself are not disabled, I'd highly recommend against using slurs in your work, even if your character is part of the community that could reclaim it. Even if you are disabled in that same way, I'd recommend caution. I often call myself a cripple in a joking light, but I probably will never feel comfortable including it in any of my work (outside articles like this where we're discussing it, of course). If you really, really must include these slurs, make sure to get input from others in the community.

Outgroup Terms

Finally, one last thing I want to bring up is in reference to the "outgroup terms" disabled people use for people without a disability.

A very common misconception is that if you aren't disabled, you're able-bodied, but this isn't true! Able-bodied (sometimes shortened to A.B.) refers to people without physical disabilities specifically, so you can be able-bodied but still have an intellectual disability or some kind of neurodivergence like autism, dyslexia, or schizophrenia. Likewise, you can be neurotypical - the word for people who aren't neurodivergent - and physically disabled.

If you want to refer to people without any disabilities at all, the most common way to do that, and the term I've been using throughout this post, is just non-disabled. Some people also use the term "abled" but this isn't as widely agreed upon, as many people assume it's just a shortened version of able-bodied.

Conclusion

As I said in the beginning, this post is meant to just be a general guide, not hard and fast rules. The disabled community isn't a monolith, and we don't agree on everything and that's ok. Different people and groups will have different preferences and that's ok too. If you're an outsider to the community and you aren't sure what words or terms to use, just ask (so long as you're polite about it and/or it's relevant to the conversation at hand, it's fine) but always respect an individual's preference over a generic piece of advice like this post. Under no circumstances should you ever correct a disabled person on how they refer to themselves and their own community. If they refer to themselves as disabled, that's great. If they call themselves, a person with a disability, also great! I can not tell you how many non-disabled people who have told me I am "disrespecting myself" for calling myself an amputee, autistic or disabled.

At the end of the day, how any individual wishes to refer to themselves is their choice, but for creatives, especially those of you writing disabled characters as a non-disabled person, it's important to be aware of the reception and implications different words may have with your audience.

[Thumbnail ID: An image of overlapping speech bubbles on a blue background containing several terms, ranging from commonly accepted to offensive, used to refer to disabled people. Some of the more easily visible bubbles say things like "differently abled," "Disabled," "Special Needs," "Person With a Disability," "Special," "Slow" and many more. In the centre, the biggest bubble says "Disability 101: The Language of Disability." /End ID]

#Writing disability with Cy Cyborg #Disability 101 #Long Post #Disability #Disabled #Disability Representation #Writing Disability #Writing #Writeblr #Authors #Creators #Writing Advice #Disabled Characters #Disability History #Language #On Writing #Disability in Media

[septembercfawkes]

What is the Inciting Incident? Definition, Purpose, Examples, Tips

The inciting incident is an event that disrupts the established normal and kicks off the main storyline. It will usually appear as an opportunity or a problem (or both) for the protagonist. And even if the protagonist initially refuses it, he must eventually address it.

For example, the inciting incident in The Hobbit is when Gandalf arrives and invites Bilbo on an adventure. It disrupts Bilbo's ordinary life, and while it is presented as an opportunity, Bilbo views that opportunity as a problem (respectable Hobbits don't go on adventures). He refuses the invitation initially, but later accepts it. If it weren't for Gandalf's invitation, the plot in The Hobbit wouldn't have happened.

The purpose of the inciting incident is to start the main plotline.

The inciting incident is known by a few other names: the "Catalyst" (Save the Cat!), the "Call to Adventure" (The Hero's Journey), and I've also heard it called the "impetus."

Unfortunately--as is somewhat common in the writing community--the term can actually be a little ambiguous, making it difficult to learn about, let alone discern. Not only are there multiple terms for the same event, but there are also disagreements in the community about which event constitutes the "inciting incident." 

So, if you have been confused about this term, I'm not surprised. To minimize confusion, I'll explain the different ways people view the inciting incident, later. For now, the above definition is currently what is generally considered the inciting incident.

Let's break down the inciting incident some more, moving from a basic understanding to an intermediate understanding to an advanced one. I'll go through more examples and even some rule breaks.

Inciting Incident Basics

The above definition works well for a basic understanding of the inciting incident. When looking at a story (your own or another's), ask yourself: What kicks off the main plot? What initial event allows that plot to start happening?

Commonly, the protagonist will be going about her ordinary life, and something comes along to disrupt it in a way that can't be ignored. Sure, the protagonist may try to ignore it or outright refuse it (like Bilbo), for a while, but for one reason or another, her life can't go back to normal. Either externally something is off, or internally something is off.

In The Hunger Games, we are introduced to Katniss and her current lifestyle as she wakes up, goes hunting, and interacts with others in District 12. The reaping happens every year. But her current lifestyle is disrupted when Effie pulls Prim's name out of the bowl. For Katniss, this is a major problem. If this hadn't happened, she would have never volunteered. Prim's name getting called sets the main plot in motion.

Intermediate Level

The inciting incident is a medium-sized turning point (also known as a plot turn). It turns the direction of the story.

Specifically, it turns the story into rising action.

Occasionally, you may see this turn depicted in basic story structure:

This moment is an external turn, meaning, it comes from outside the protagonist--the protagonist is not creating the turn himself.

Gandalf invites Bilbo.

Effie pulls out Prim's name.

In Star Wars IV, Leia's message reveals she needs help.

Occasionally the protagonist may walk unknowingly into the inciting incident. In A Nightmare Before Christmas, Jack Skellington quite literally walks into Christmas Town, but he doesn't know where he is or what he is doing. The experience of Christmas Town happens to him. He isn't going into the town to make things happen.

So the inciting incident is one instance in the story where the protagonist will be acted upon in an important way.

And since this is a turn that disrupts the protagonist's life, it needs to come into contact with the protagonist.

In Mulan, the Huns deciding to invade China isn't the inciting incident, because it doesn't disrupt Mulan's life. Instead, the inciting incident comes when her own father is called to war, which disrupts her current life in a significant way.

Likewise, Princess Leia recording her message isn't the inciting incident. Luke's ordinary life isn't disrupted until he finds the message.

The protagonist is present for the inciting incident.

Advanced

There are several other moments that often (or may) happen around the inciting incident. This is why there are some arguments and confusion as to what the inciting incident actually is.

First off, a prior event may lead to or prep the inciting incident.

Willy Wonka putting the golden tickets in the chocolate bars can appear to be the inciting incident, but notice it doesn't involve Charlie. It's simply set up for the inciting incident to happen.

After the inciting incident, the character will respond to whatever happened. Often he will try to ignore it, deny it, or outright refuse it. In the Hero's Journey, this is known as the "Refusal of the Call." In Save the Cat! this is known as "Debate."

We talked about an example of this earlier, which is when Bilbo refuses Gandalf's invitation. Another example would be Sulley trying to get rid of Boo right after she appears in Monster's Inc.

While this is a common beat, not all protagonists actually have it. If the protagonist doesn't Refuse the Call, often another character will voice the Refusal, or at least hesitation, instead.

But ultimately, the inciting incident will need to be addressed in the proper way (i.e. in the way that allows the main plot to happen). This will appear as the character choosing to engage in the main conflict, which will often be demonstrated by a strong action, such as Bilbo running out his door to catch up with the dwarves, or Harry Potter leaving with Hagrid.

Frequently, this will hit at the end of Act I, and be Act I's major turning point. The Hero's Journey calls this "Crossing the Threshold" and Save the Cat! calls this "Break into Two." Commonly it is also known as Plot Point 1.

In any case, this is where some of the ambiguity in the writing community comes in. Some will argue that the inciting incident is the preparatory event, like when Willy Wonka puts the golden tickets in the chocolate bars. Some will say it's the disrupting incident, like when Prim's name gets called. Some will say it's when the character engages in the main conflict, like when Bilbo runs out his door to join the dwarves. And some will even lump part or all of these events together.

It's no surprise that things can get confusing.

This is why it can be helpful to consider Act I's structure . . .

Structuring Act I

Because of the ambiguity in the writing community, sometimes it's helpful to look at the structure of Act I to gain some clarity.

In most stories, Act I will take up the first quarter (~25%) of the narrative (but there are exceptions and variations.)

Ideally, it will open with a hook.

Often there is some sort of "shake-up" halfway through (~12% into the story).

And there will be a big turning point, a peak, at the end of Act I (~25% in).

Example:

Harry Potter starts with a hook--unusual things are happening all day and culminate in a baby who defeated a dark wizard being left on a doorstep. Halfway through Act I there is a shake-up--a letter arrives addressed to Harry. Near the end, there is a big turn--Hagrid tells Harry he is a wizard, which leads Harry to choose to go with him.

Some feel that the letter's arrival is the inciting incident. Some feel it's Hagrid's announcement. (I originally leaned toward it being Hagrid, and now feel like it's the letter.) But at the end of the day, what's most important is understanding how the pieces work. We have the hook, the shake-up, and the peak.

The letter also gets the story on track to hit Hagrid's announcement, which is a nice touch.

Placement of the Inciting Incident

With an understanding of how Act I is commonly structured, we can more easily discuss where to place the inciting incident.

Perhaps most commonly, the inciting incident is placed at the shake-up--about halfway through Act I, which is what (arguably) happens in Harry Potter. 

This is a nice place to put it, because the audience has time to get to know the characters and the world and their trajectory, before something comes along to throw everything off balance.

But the inciting incident can also double as the hook. This is what happens in The Hunger Games. Prim's name gets called as early as chapter one.

It can also happen just before (or some may argue, part of) the big turning point, which is what happens in Frozen. Elsa's powers go out of control when with Anna, and right after Elsa freezes the kingdom and runs away.

And even with all of that said, these placements are just guidelines. Place it where it works best for your story.

Get your hook, your shake-up, and your peak--and make sure the inciting incident that kicks off the main plotline is in Act I, and you should be good.

Multiple Inciting Incidents

A couple of times I've been asked what to do if a story seems to have multiple inciting incidents. Thankfully, this is usually more of an asset than a problem.

First, you may want to check that this isn't a matter of "writing community ambiguity." It may be that these are simply different beats: a moment that preps, the disruption itself, the character's reaction to the disruption, and the character's choice to engage in the main conflict (which leads him or her into the main "journey" of the plot).

If all the events are clearly linked, it's likely they are simply key beats of Act I for the main plotline.

If the events aren't linked on one trajectory, it's likely you have inciting incidents for different plotlines.

When people talk about inciting incidents, they are usually talking about them in regard to the main plotline.

But secondary plotlines can have their own inciting incidents.

For example, if the inciting incident doesn't hit at the shake-up, it's common for an inciting incident of another plotline to hit there, such as the inciting incident of the relationship plotline (which is often the "meet cute.") 

This is what happens in Frozen with Anna and Hans--they have an inciting incident for a relationship. But the main plot doesn't kick off until Elsa loses control of her magic at the coronation, which happens near the end of Act I.

Depending on how your plotlines run through your story, you may have multiple inciting incidents--one for each plotline.

Alternatively, it's also possible to have the same event work as an inciting incident for multiple plotlines, which is arguably what happens in The Prestige. The protagonist's wife drowning kicks off the internal, the external, and the relationship plotlines simultaneously.

In any case, suffice it to say that seeming to have multiple inciting incidents isn't usually something to worry about.

What is a worry is if there is no inciting incident or rather, the inciting incident comes at the wrong time, hurting the pacing of the story.

Rule Breaks

So far we have mainly gone over what is typical of inciting incidents. Let's go over some variations or rule breaks.

The inciting incident almost always, always happens on page or on screen. It should, because it's such a critical moment in the plot. However, it's not impossible for it to happen off page or off screen.

For example, by general definition, in Knives Out, the inciting incident is when the anonymous letter arrives for Detective Blanc, but notice that happens off screen.

In fact, it practically happened before the story started. If we view Harlan's death as a prologue (acting as a hook), the real story doesn't start until the investigation and questioning are already underway--after the inciting incident happened.

Some argue that the inciting incident can happen before the story officially starts, but it's an unusual situation.

What's interesting in the case of Knives Out is that the audience learns about the inciting incident ~12% in. So even though it technically already happened, it's still placed where the inciting incident often goes, at the shake-up. And it does shake things up, for the audience. Who hired Detective Blanc? We don't know.

Such things are more likely to happen in stories that are structured achronologically (which I plan to talk about in a post someday). Nearly all of Act I of Knives Out is achronological.

Tips to Keep in Mind

Here are some tips to keep in mind when writing the inciting incident:

Establish what the protagonist's current ("normal") life is like before the inciting incident. The inciting incident is a medium-sized turning point, so think about what you need to convey to the audience to make this particular turn powerful. In order to make Prim's name being called shocking, Collins needed to first establish how unlikely it was for her to be picked and how Katniss was essentially her foster mother.

Usually it's effective to start the character in the opposite state of where he will be by the end of Act I, with the inciting incident acting as the initial disruptor (of course). Jack Skellington should first be bored of Halloween before he discovers Christmas. The turn wouldn't be as powerful if he was satisfied with his role. (It would have been okay. But it would have been weaker.)

Start the story with the protagonist already on a specific trajectory. Convey what direction the character's life is meant to go if it continues its current path. Then, when the inciting incident disrupts it and sends it on a new trajectory, it will be more impactful.

If the inciting incident is viewed as a problem, it's often great to first pull the protagonist high--on an upward trajectory. In Legally Blonde, Elle thinks Warner is going to propose to her, so the inciting incident, the problem, of getting dumped hits harder.

Likewise, if the inciting incident is viewed as an opportunity, it's often great to first pull the protagonist low--on a downward trajectory. 

Because the inciting incident is a disruptor, almost always it should be something the protagonist didn't foresee. She may think she knows what's going to happen (like Elle), but it ends up being different.

Since this is a critical turn in the story, make sure it happens on page (unless you have a good reason for a rule break). It should almost always be dramatized, in a scene, not summary. You may want to bump up the prose for it.

Get your protagonist's reaction to it on page, too. His reaction is a great opportunity to convey his character--whether it's brief or it takes several chapters. 

The protagonist almost always voices hesitation in his reaction. If he doesn't, then usually another character will instead. The purpose of this beat is to emphasize the stakes, the seriousness of this new trajectory.

Now, with all that said, there is always room for variation, so choose what works best for your story. 

The inciting incident is usually one of the first scenes that comes to mind when brainstorming a book, so have fun with it!

Related Articles

The Hero's Journey Explained: The Beginning

The Steadfast, Flat-arc Protagonist in Story: The Beginning

Save the Cat! Explained: The Beginning

Story Structure Explained: Prologues, Hooks, Setups, Inciting Incidents

Structuring Your Relationship Plotline: Key Beats

#writing tips #writeblr #writing tips and tricks #writing reference #writing tip #writing help #writer #writing #writing advice

[noisytenant]

The thing that I really love about the counselor scene is how, like most other things in Petscop, it walks an unplaceable line where you can't really determine if it's a "good" development or not.

Petscop (the story) strips the sense of safety and comfort from every major locus of stability available to a child. Home, family, and school become charged, but that's honestly not so surprising for those familiar with abuse. But then it erodes the world of games and play, where you aren't spared even in your "escape"--and systems that exist to get you help, like counseling or adoption, seem distorted, sinister, clandestine.

I do ultimately read the ending of Petscop as an optimistic one, where Care is adopted by Lina (and Belle) and is allowed to become Paul, who comes to confront and accept his past and maybe move forward. But I think it's critical that the adoption is beat-for-beat quite similar to the initial kidnapping, that there's this sense of greater machinations at work whose motivations can't be understood (the Credits ending left a real pit in my stomach; And what does it imply if Lina is the "Boss"?). We don't really get to know what Paul thinks or feels about all this, just that he kept playing until the end (and potentially against his will).

I don't think any other story has really captured how trauma makes it difficult to discern safety from danger in such an overt way. I haven't really experienced a story where you have to simultaneously hold both the best and worst interpretation of an event in equal measure. I think that's what makes Petscop such an exceptional story to me.

So that's the interesting thing about the counselor's affirmations. On one hand, after abuse that seems to have fixated on asserting one reality onto Care--that she was Lina reborn, and that she needs to be turned back--The idea of having one's own sense of reality affirmed is a breath of fresh air.

But at the same time, it places a lot of pressure to resolve ambiguities, to have answers for things that aren't fully known or are yet to be understood. If the whole world will move to make your story true, are you going to spin a happy tale, or a sad one? Is Care's escape a victory, or just a shifting from one kind of abuse to another?

The game obsessively records the player(s) arguably to extract information and become a source of truth. Where IS the windmill? Where is Lina's grave? What happened between Care's escape and her arrival at the house? The game seeks a certain reality, but codifies ambiguities and half-truths--explicitly requiring the player to hold multiple realities at the same time.

The player in the counselor's room is suddenly tasked with resolving these ambiguities, not necessarily through telling their story, but through living their life with the expectation of having it affirmed.

Yet by bestowing the player with the ability to assert their reality, the counselor actually reinforces the power of greater forces to enforce and manifest that reality. Even if it's wielded to positive ends, it's a terrifying notion.

You're free to do anything you please, but can you really bear to, knowing that something out there can make whatever you believe come true?

#I never did finish my thesis about petscop and information control/the construction of reality and its rship to trauma and abuse #but someday perhaps #indexed post #petscop #petscop spoilers #Also the Counselor song is one of my favorite on the ost

[magicalbats]

Day 14: Orgasm Denial

Rating: R-18+

Word Count: 7925

Warnings: Afab!reader, (lots of) gendered language, social power dynamics, boss/employee, upperclass/lowerclass, tbh I’m not entirely sure how to tag some of this xmdkxkdnd, manual masturbation, dacryphilia, I wanted reader to be a bit of a bimbo in this one so if she seems stupid that’s why lol

A/N: sorry this one is late! I am officially behind on my prompts now but regardless of how long it takes I WILL be completing this Kinktober challenge! Unfortunately the real world demands attention sometimes but I’m not giving up 😤

⭐

Stamping down the urge to nervously fiddle with your hands, you clutch at the front of your arpon to keep them still and try very hard to focus on what the man in front of you is saying. The Palais Mermonia housed a great many regular faces, some of which you only saw from time to time and could not seem to commit to memory, and yet you’d been seeing mister Danon’s more and more often than anyone else’s recently. You didn’t understand why that would be though, and had at first written it off as mere coincidence. A simple matter of happenstance and nothing more. 

But then it kept happening at an ever increasing frequency until it seemed like you were running into him almost every day now. Only then had it occurred to you, in a far off, distant sort of way, that he must have been making a concerted effort to talk with you like this. That was the only reasonable explanation for it that you could glean, because the one person you saw at the Palais with any amount of real regularity was the honorable Iudex himself and certainly not the man who’s job description you could not seem to recall. But that didn’t exactly explain why. 

You wanted to understand what would make him seek you out like this, so you attentively listen to mister Danon when he speaks even though you sometimes find him a bit difficult to follow. He seemed like he was probably a good person and respectable enough, but he had a strange habit of jumping from topic to topic without much rhyme or reason that you could discern. One moment he would be talking to you about matters of work, about documents he needed to have signed or the latest gossip that had everyone all in a buzz, and the next … why, he would suddenly say something off hand about recreational activities to do in the city or places to dine, a book he’d read recently and even the types of food he fancied. 

It was all very strange, and listening to him talk does not help in the slightest. In fact, it actually seems to make it worse. 

You didn’t have the slightest idea why he would want to discuss upcoming stageplays with you nor why he should feel the need to announce that his favorite dish was aspic as if it was something that should be of great interest to you. It was all really quite strange. 

“You see, if you take a few fish when they’re still flopping around and fresh,” He tells you, eagerly gesturing his way through an explanation you hadn’t asked for. “That will guarantee their taste and ensure your aspic comes out just divine. Like something straight from the Gods themselves, if you want the honest truth of it. I don’t think I’ve ever tasted anything more sumptuous!” 

“A - ah,” You make a valid attempt to smile politely but it was difficult to keep up with him like this. What did you care for the precise steps to make such an unappetizing sounding dish? 

“You know, if you were interested, cherie … I could make it for you to try, if you would like. Ah, what I mean is — it might be nice if we can sit down together and chat over a meal at my residence. Just the two of us.”

Your brows slowly crawl straight up to your hairline. “Oh.” 

Before you can think to say anything else, an attention grabbing thud against the marble floor makes you spin around and a smile quickly overtakes your face. 

“Monsieur Neuvillette! It is a pleasure to see you today.”

The kindly man sends you a slow, vaguely bemused half-smile. “Good afternoon, mademoiselle. Mister Danon. You looked like you were having a rather lively conversation just now. I hope I didn't interrupt anything important?” 

“Of course not, monsieur. It was nothing important at all.” You beam up at him, eager and happy to hang on his every word no matter how benign or minuscule. Much to your surprise, though, he sends another unreadable look over your shoulder and when you turn back to Danon you’re more than a little surprised to find him slouched as if in defeat. Your eyebrows quickly make the climb up to your hairline again. “Mister Danon, are you alright? Goodness, you suddenly look quite unwell.” 

“Yes, everything is fine. Nothing to worry about.” He waves off your concern, but it doesn’t escape your notice that he makes a concerted effort not to look directly at you now and instead turns his attention towards monsieur Neuvillette. “Forgive me, your honor. I’m afraid I must be going now. My break is almost over and my presence will be sorely missed if I fail to show up on time.”

The stately Iudex inclines his chin in a brief nod of acknowledgment. “You needn’t apologize, mister Danon. On behalf of all of Fontaine, thank you for the hard work you do.” 

Giving monsieur Neuvillette a stiff bow, he turns to do the same to you. “Mademoiselle.” 

You quickly bob a perplexed curtsy back. “Monsieur?” 

Ignoring or perhaps not hearing the question in your voice, Danon pivots on his heel and makes a hasty retreat down the long corridor without so much as a backwards glance. You can’t seem to shake the feeling you’ve said or done something wrong though, and you watch him go with a tiny flutter of anxiety in your chest until another soft thud of monsieur Neuvillette’s cane on the marble floor pulls you around again. 

With a small frown in place, you tip your head back to look up at him when he comes to stand next to you. “Monsieur Neuvillette?” 

He offers you a small, gentle smile, no doubt meant to placate and soothe, though it does little in the way of good. “Please do not look so put out, mademoiselle. Would you like to accompany me to my office?” 

Nodding, you fall into step beside him. You find yourself listlessly fiddling with your hands now, unable to stop it when it felt like you'd made some horrible faux pas, and they anxiously flit over your front to smooth out invisible wrinkles. What a strange and confusing situation to end up in, and with no idea how to navigate it either. It seemed like you’d done the exact opposite of what you’d initially set out to do … you didn’t understand it in the slightest. 

“Forgive me for asking you such a strange question so suddenly, but … did I say something to offend mister Danon just now?” 

Noising a quiet sound of consideration, monsieur Neuvillette thinks on that for a brief moment. “I am certainly no expert on the topic, mademoiselle, but if I am not mistaken I do believe mister Danon harbors a romantic interest in you. I believe he may have felt slighted when you said what you were discussing was of no importance, and he took it as a sign of rejection.” 

You jerk to a sudden halt with an inelegant scuffle of your heels. “Romantic?” Eyes widening in mute horror, you feel your cheeks start to grow uncomfortably warm. That did make sense, you were more than just a little stunned to realize. The way he made the effort to find you wherever you were working, stop you and talk to you; the way he would casually sprinkle in bits and pieces of his personal life and subtly suggest food, diners, places to go and things to do … had he really been laying out suggestions this whole time hoping you would show an interest in him back? But — “But he never said … oh, monsieur Neuvillette, I had no idea!” 

He looks at you with a soft, sympathetic smile where he’d stopped half a pace in front of you. “It is alright if you didn’t know. Situations like these can be difficult to — parse sometimes, and I do not think you acted with malicious intent. Come, let us continue this over a cup of tea.” 

Embarrassed and roiling with a crushing sense of guilt, you slowly trail after the Iudex to his large, exquisitely furnished office where you quickly fall into your usual habit of preparing the chinaware while he situates himself on the ornate lounge. It is muscle memory alone that sees you through your task, motions practiced and subconscious after working at the Palais for so long, which comes as a great relief in that moment. You were far too preoccupied with this startling revelation to give the pouring of the tea much thought. Mister Danon’s intentions were shocking enough but, perhaps even more so, you’re surprised at your own lack of awareness on the matter. 

You felt rather bad now, for listening to him so attentively and humoring the conversations he was always keen to share with you. Had he mistaken it for budding affection on your part? Have you unknowingly encouraged him to keep trying or, somehow worse, made him believe you were merely toying with his feelings this whole time? What a terrible thing to do to another person, intentionally or not. 

Monsieur Neuvillette silently regards you when you bring the tea over on a silver tray but you can’t bring yourself to look at him while you set everything down on the low table in front of him. He was always nothing but kind to you despite your lower station of housekeeper, just as he was with all of the staff that kept the Palais functioning as it should. Everyone from the notarizers and the title clerks right down to even the janitors were treated with nothing but respect and dignity, and that very much included you. But you were a bit too ashamed, too guilty to meet his gaze right now, and you quickly shuffle back a polite distance once everything is laid out so you can further avoid his eyes. 

A stretch of quiet settles over the room, and you have to try very hard not to start fiddling with your uniform again. 

“Won’t you make yourself a cup and join me?” He ventures at last. 

“I couldn’t, monsieur Neuvillette. But thank you.” 

He seems to deliberate over something for a short beat before half turning his body on the lounge to look up at you. “I must apologize for prying like this but what about the situation with mister Danon has you so upset? If you didn’t know what his intentions were then you certainly cannot be held responsible for not acting accordingly.” 

You hesitate to discuss this matter with him, well aware that it was improper and impolite to talk over such things with not only the aristocracy but also the man who was effectively your employer. It felt very much like an unspoken boundary that should not, under any circumstances, be crossed but … when you take in monsieur Neuvillette’s imploring expression your resolve starts to crumble. He was a wise and exceptionally astute figurehead who always treated every case laid out before him no matter how small or insignificant with the utmost care and consideration. Perhaps he would have some insight to share with you, or at least some advice. 

“Well,” You finally relent, tipping your chin down to shyly regard your buckled shoes. “I’m aware that this might sound a little odd but I just feel so guilty about everything … I should have realized sooner why he kept seeking me out like he did. As silly as it is, I can’t help but feel like I tricked him somehow.” 

“That is a silly thing, isn’t it?” He agrees in a soft, endlessly patient tone. “How could you have tricked someone if you weren’t aware of what they wanted from you? In the unlikely event that a case such as this were presented to me, I wouldn’t even be able to rule in favor of misrepresentation on the defendant’s part. You have to act with knowing and intention to be held accountable for trickery.” 

You despondently mull that over for a long stretch. Logically, you knew what he was saying to be true and you, as everyone else in Fontaine, trusted his judgment implicitly. It wasn’t so much that you doubted him but, rather, your guilt was so great that it couldn’t accept this answer. The thought alone that you might have broken mister Danon’s heart after stringing him along for months almost brings tears to your eyes. 

“Does that mean you wouldn’t deign to punish me for it?” It’s barely more than a whisper. 

“No, not unconscionably. No one in their right mind would.” 

It feels like you're withering on the spot. You didn’t understand it yourself, why you were so upset to hear this rather than relieved at finding you hadn’t broken any laws or regulations that would hold you accountable. Even if mister Danon were to try to file a suit against you to mend some of his bruised ego it sounded like he wouldn’t even have a case to stand on — and that was good. 

So why did it feel as if you were skating by without making proper amends for the transgression?

“Mademoiselle?” 

You finally bring your head up to look at him. “Do you think mister Danon will forgive me if I apologize?” 

Monsieur Neuvillette’s expression softens, taking on a truly remorseful edge. “I don’t know, little one. He might. I can’t see into the future any more than you can, but I think if it’s something that bothers you so much then it certainly wouldn’t hurt to talk to him about it.” 

Blinking back a sudden deluge of tears, you take an impulsive step towards him with the tray clutched to your chest. “Oh, monsieur Neuvillette, I don’t know what to do! How can I possibly ameliorate my actions if he might not even accept my apology? I — I didn’t mean to lead him on!” 

Very neatly, calmly, monsieur Neuvillette folds his gloved hands on his lap and studies you for an indeterminable amount of time with that closed and shuttered expression. You aren’t sure how many minutes pass when you’re a right mess inside, all your emotions kicked up into such a veritable whirlwind that it’s all you can do just to hold it together. But, at length, he eventually draws a careful breath. 

“What I’m hearing is that your guilt over this matter will not be dissuaded until you feel appropriate action has been taken against you to right what is, in your mind, a very serious wrong, intentional or not. Is that correct?” 

You blink, more than a little surprised at how concisely he’s grasped your thoughts on the matter. It almost sounds foolish when he puts it like that, in such blunt terms, but there is no denying the pang that resonates within you. “Yes, monsieur. I feel terrible for what I’ve done …” 

He seems to hesitate, his brows drawing inward almost imperceptibly. “Guilt can function as its own form of punishment as well, and a very effective one at that. But you must understand something, mademoiselle. The law simply is not applicable here. There is no legal recourse and, therefore, no system in place to enforce any sort of repercussions against you.” 

You take another step closer, feeling fervent and hot. “Then will you punish me, monsieur Neuvillette?” 

Abruptly, he goes very still. “I am hardly in any position to mete out such discipline,” He says slowly, carefully. “And, far more importantly, I’m not quite sure what you would have me do. I don’t believe this situation would call for a monetary fine or even any corrective action on an employment level … and I’m certainly not going to spank you over my knee like a child.” 

Flustered heat crawls up your neck to settle in your cheeks. You hate the way your knees grow weak and knobby at the thought of that, but you were decidedly in agreement with him. It would have been inappropriate for him to strike you in any capacity, least of all over something like this. Still, though … 

“Isn’t there something to be done?” 

Monsieur Neuvillette’s expression settles back into that somber mask again, eyeing you for a drawn out beat before he finally issues a clipped sigh. Leaning back to recline against the lounge, he stiffly crosses his legs and once more settles his folded hands atop the bent knee. “Come here, little one. Stand next to me.” 

Your feet almost don’t want to move from the spot but you force them to uproot so you can cautiously shuffle forward. You aren’t sure what to expect when your cotton stuffed head was such a mess, but all he does when you come up beside him is hold out an expectant hand. It takes you a moment to realize what he wants and you flush even hotter as you pass him the tray. Taking it from you, he sedately sets it aside on the cushion before fixing his attention on you once again. 

“This is another topic in which I lack expertise but I might have something in mind that could satisfy your need for penance. However, I will not force or otherwise coerce you into it, and you will likewise be free to walk away at any time. Once you have decided you’ve made the appropriate dues for leading mister Danon on, as you put it, then this arrangement will end immediately. Is that agreeable to you?” 

You bob your head in a quick nod. “Yes, monsieur Neuvillette. Thank you.” 

Squaring his broad shoulders, the usually kindly disposition with which he carried himself outside of the courtroom fades and is replaced by the stern set of his mouth, the slight tension along his brow, to indicate that it is the Chief Justice sitting before you now. A chill runs up your spine at the change in him, so subtle yet unavoidably obvious, and a sharp look from pale lavender eyes stops you from saying anything. You’d never before been subjected to such a hard expression from him and you can’t quite stop yourself from sympathizing with whoever was unlucky enough to find themselves standing before him in court. It really wasn’t any wonder why he held the title of supreme judge in all of Fontaine when you saw him like this. 

“Do not thank me yet, mademoiselle. If you would be so kind, please lift your skirt for me.” 

Your spine stiffens with a tremor so powerful it very nearly bowls you over on the spot. Obediently, though, you reach down with numb hands to gather the full, flouncy material of your uniform and shyly hike it up along with the lace petticoat underneath. 

“Higher.” He commands, intently observing the slow ascension of your skirts. “That’s it, up around your waist. Good.” 

Sucking in a faltering breath, you sway unsteadily on your feet and try not to lose your nerve. The thought that you would be able to alleviate your guilt with this steels your resolve though, and your hands start to shake as your stockinged upper thighs are revealed to him, the simple garters holding them in place and, finally, your lace panties. Your face is on fire while you nudge everything up a little further to make sure it was satisfactory and to his liking despite still harboring some very real doubts about this in the back of your mind. 

He did say he wasn’t going to spank you … didn’t he? 

Casually, monsieur Neuvillette reaches out a hand to slip long, elegantly poised fingers into the space between your thighs and you suck in a sharp gasp when he nudges them up against your cunt just so. The touch is featherlight and barely there, but it makes more blood rush into your face to leave you rattled and a bit dizzy. But you don’t pull away from him as he takes his time petting over the apex of your fleshy mound and the slit running along your body, determined to see this through. Somehow having him touch you like this was not nearly as embarrassing as the way his expression doesn’t change while he does it, you’re quite ashamed to realize. 

“Are you sensitive here?” He asks you softly, prompting you to swallow. Hard. 

“I … I don’t know. I’m not sure.” 

Quietly clicking his tongue, monsieur Neuvillette presses up against you a little more firmly, gloved fingertips digging into your defenseless clit to make you jolt and give a startled yelp. “You seem responsive enough to me. I only know of this particular activity in theory but … well, it doesn’t really matter. I believe we should have no problem at all using this method for your penance.” 

“W - which is, monsieur?” 

“I believe I’ve heard the people call this ‘edging’ before. It sounds rather dreadful, doesn’t it? Like some sort of barbaric torture technique.” Carefully observing your face, he pushes up even harder to grind tight, mean little circles against that sensitive pleasure button, and your eyes grow big as you stiltedly rock forward on your toes. “I suppose it could still be called that, depending on who you asked. The instigator or the receptee. I’m sure they would have drastically different opinions on the matter.”

Whimpering, you numbly readjust your hold on your skirt to make sure it stays up and out of his way while he’s doing this. Not that you were entirely sure you liked this specific method in terms of punishments when it was so obvious your body was eagerly responding to it – from the way your pussy clenches around nothing and starts to slick for him and even to the way your nipples stiffen against the inside of your shirt – but perhaps that was a good thing. Would you have really been able to say your penance was paid in full if this trial were not appropriately challenging?

“Wh … where?” 

Blinking at the little mouse squeak noise, monsieur Neuvillette just keeps rubbing over you with that steady motion of his hand. “I beg your pardon?” 

Trying valiantly to keep the fluster off of your face and failing miserably at it, you shyly avert your gaze. “I was just curious … where did you hear of this?”

“A reasonable question.” He relents, allowing the smallest note of humor to color his voice. “While it is true I don’t often partake in such crude conversations, it can be a little hard to avoid at times. Even here, in the Palais Mermonia. I believe they refer to it as ‘water cooler talk’.”

“Oh.” You’d overhead such things before too, now that you thought of it. The other women who worked at the Palais were more prone to gossip, joint complaints about their husbands or beaus, fawning over babies and first days of school, and academic achievements, while the men … they would sometimes change topics when they saw you coming but more than once you’d caught snippets of inappropriate conversations. A recent visit they’d had to a brothel or perhaps how they fantasized about doing certain things to their partners. You always felt mildly scandalized whenever it would happen, shocked that such discussions were being entertained at the Palais, and yet — 

Letting out a slow, stuttering breath, you carefully glance down at yourself to look at monsieur Neuvillette’s hand disappearing between the soft pudge of your thighs. This was vastly more inappropriate than any ‘water cooler talk’ and that realization embarrasses you a great deal. Your cheeks feel a little hotter, your blood pumping harder, and you whine, very low in your throat. Was this really an acceptable form of punishment? 

You think it probably is, because the shame that comes with it is potent and cloying, especially when your hips give a weak judder at what he’s doing. To think that the Iudex himself was touching you like this … 

“Does that feel good, little one?” 

Twitching at the sound of his voice, you give a stilted nod. “Yes, monsieur, thank you … but — but I don’t think I quite understand. Are punishments supposed to feel good?” 

“Not necessarily, no. But this is only a part of it. Relax, sweet girl. I will ensure your guilt is appropriately mitigated in due time.” 

You still don’t truly understand it, but you allow yourself to ease into it anyway. Relax into his touch. Slipping your eyes closed, you just take a moment to feel the sensation of him rubbing over your cunt. The press of his firm fingers pudges your lips to highlight how soft and pliable they are, the blunt tips of his gloves sinking into the slit. Even the thin layer of your panties is not enough to lessen the drag in any meaningful way, and it doesn’t seem to take long at all for you to start feeling sticky with arousal. It’s copious and excessive, almost implausibly so considering that he’d only touched you in this one specific spot thus far. Hardly at all. 

You hadn’t thought you would be so easily excitable and yet the proof of it is in the way you tremble for him, the way your breathing gradually picks up to make your breasts heave under your blouse, and it quickly becomes difficult just to stay standing in place. You wanted to twist and pull away, give your drooling cunt even a moment's reprieve, but you don’t give in to the urge. That wasn’t what he’d agreed to, and you trusted his judgment … 

So you stand there, trembling, while your stiff nipples cut up into your shirt in search of the same friction, and you try not to cry out. Your pussy tingles against his hand, the pressure it exerts so constant and steady that it rapidly starts to feel like the building pressure in you is reaching critical mass. Much sooner than you could have anticipated or guessed, it was as if your body was particularly weak for monsieur Neuvillette’s dutiful attention. 

Softly wheezing when your legs buckle and threaten to give out, you subtly tip your pelvis further into his hand and it becomes that much more apparent how wet you really are. How stiff and engorged your clit had gotten. A violent shudder tears through you at the meaty, swollen drag of it under his fingers, head tipping back and. - - 

He retracts his hand so suddenly it leaves you lurching in place. Raggedly gasping at the sudden loss, you turn wide, wild eyes on monsieur Neuvillette but he merely gives you that same somber expression as he interlaces his fingers on top of his bent knee once again, unfalteringly casual about it. 

“That will be all for right now, mademoiselle. Thank you.” 

You just gape at him, stunned and confused, with your skirts still hiked up around your waist like a shameless fool. “Wh - wha —“ 

A look of sympathy flashes across monsieur Neuvillette’s face. “This is the penance you wanted so badly. As many times as you like, I will bring you close to orgasm but I will not let you actually reach climax. It is the only suitable punishment I could think of for your specific … transgression.” 

It takes a great deal of effort for you to do it, but you suck in a slow, shuddering breath to steady yourself. “I … I see. Thank you, monsieur. I understand now.” 

“Very good. Now, run along. I’m sure you’ve got work to do elsewhere.” 

He offers you a small smile that you think is meant to be reassuring but it does very little to distract from the throbbing ache in your cunt or calm your pounding heartbeat. Numbly, you drop your skirt and petticoat back into place and run your hands over it to smooth out the (now real, not imagined) wrinkles as you slowly make your way towards the door. It was like you were in a trance. 

“And mademoiselle?”

You pause, turning to look back at him. “Yes, monsieur?” 

“I would like to see you in my office again around noontime. Please do not forget and don’t be late.” 

~*~

It hadn’t taken you long to realize just how insidious and cruel this strange brand of punishment truly was. You left his office such a sticky mess between the legs that even trying to clean yourself in the powder room did little good against the slick oozing out of you to stain your panties and make them stick to you, moulding against your cunt. It serves as a near constant reminder of how close you’d been to climax, how monsieur Neuvillette’s fingers had felt touching such an intimate part of your body, and how torturous it had felt to have that friction taken away so suddenly. 

The wisdom of the Iudex impresses you even now though, for you did indeed see why he’d deemed this the only appropriate corrective measure that would fit the crime. You had unknowingly strung mister Danon along with your feminine charm and wiles, so it did indeed make sense to turn that back around on you in some way. 

And although it does take a while, the distracting pulse in your cunt slowly fades into an afterthought in the back of your mind while you flit about the Palais tending to various tasks and seeing that everything was as it should be. At some point you even start to forget how your damp panties cling to you and that makes it much easier to view this trial as an easy obstacle to overcome. You would simply allow monsieur Neuvillette to carry out this task a handful of times, consider your self flagellation completed and then move on with your life. 

Yes, this really was the best method of making your peace with the situation. 

Comforted in your conviction, you return to monsieur Neuvillette’s office at the appointed time and issue a gentle rap at the door. His voice filters through without missing a beat, calling for you to come in, and you enter without reservation. 

Perhaps you should have been more wary of underestimating him or this game you were playing but you think nothing of it as you make your way across the room to stand in front of his stately desk. He looks up at you with a brief smile that inexplicably makes your pulse thrum a little faster, and that surprises you slightly. Catches you off guard. 

“Thank you for your punctuality, little one. I have a meeting scheduled after lunch is over so I wanted to tend to you before I got too busy.” 

Self consciously, you avert your gaze. “Are you sure this is alright, monsieur? I don’t want you to go hungry because of me.” 

“Nonsense. I planned accordingly and already ate before you came by.” Not lingering on the thought for very long, he takes a moment to straighten a stack of papers and neatly set them aside, out of the way. Nudging his high backed chair out from under the desk, he half turns and situates himself first before reclining against the backrest and finally looking up at you again. “Come. No need to feel shy.” 

His words have the opposite effect of making you feel ten times more shy than you originally did, and you can feel yourself starting to blush again as you slowly round the desk to come up beside him. Standing just a scant few inches from him like this it occurs to you, suddenly, that you probably should have been a bit more apprehensive about returning to his chamber like this. He was going to touch you again … oh, perhaps you had not thought this through all the way.

“Here.” He says, drawing you back into the moment with a gentle pat against his leg. “Sit on my lap, little one. This should make things a bit easier for both of us.” 

The flush that crawls up your face is an intense and overwhelming one. “M - monsieur, I — I couldn’t possibly be so presumptuous!” 

“Is it presumptuous if I’m telling you to do it?” 

Your spine stiffens at the slightly hardened tone in his voice, the edge that seems to cut across any of your weak excuses, and you quickly realize it is once again the Chief Justice sitting before you now, not the kindly monsieur Neuvillette. And he was looking at you very expectantly. 

Swallowing your nerves, you reluctantly shuffle closer and turn to lower yourself onto his leg with a slow, stiff motion of your body. The firm pressure and warmth of him underneath you is almost enough to send you running from the room in hysterics, but before you can even think to change your mind his arm comes forward to secure itself around your middle. A surprised little yelp bursts out of you when he hauls you back against him to settle more firmly on his lap, completely disregarding how you tense up and shudder on top of him. 

“There. Isn’t that much better?” He softly coos at you, tugging you back to lean against his front. Your face feels like it’s on fire but you don’t fight it, only whimpering quietly when he at last has you situated how he wants. 

“M - monsieur …” You mewl into the suddenly statically charged office, unable to stop it, but he just quietly tuts at you as he turns his head to press his mouth against your hair. 

“Now, now, you’re alright. I’ve got you. There isn’t any reason to be so nervous.” A violent tremor tears through you when you feel his lips purse against the side of your head in what you think must be a brief kiss — but you don’t get the chance to fully process the significance of that as he bends a little closer to put his mouth near your ear now. “Spread your legs for me, little one. Let me see you.” 

Dizzy with the surge of white hot arousal that abruptly crashes into you with all the force of a sack of bricks, you give a weak, twitchy roll of your body against him and reach down with trembling hands to grab at your skirt. Slowly inching it up, you tip your chin down to watch with him as more and more of your thighs are revealed. The soft pudge around the tops of your stockings embarrasses you somewhat but not nearly as much as your panties do. Even from this angle you can see a dark, wet spot staining the crotch when you ease your legs open and you whimper softly at the sight of it. 

“Goodness, you certainly soaked yourself earlier didn’t you? Poor thing,” With a quiet click of his tongue, monsieur Neuvillette reaches down past cotton and lace, and voluminous frills to slide his hand over your mound. Your breath hitches as you watch him do it, cupping your pussy with an almost apologetic squeeze, and you quickly turn your head away before you can say or do something else you’ll regret today. 

You had to admit, it was very naive and shortsighted of you to consider this an easy penance just because it was not a constant, pressing concern at the forefront of your mind. How very foolish you had been. 

“I was thinking about it earlier and I found myself quite curious,” He admits, still just holding your cunt in the palm of his hand. “Would it be too impolite of me to ask how often you usually pleasure yourself?” 

Your chest dramatically heaves with the ragged gasp you suck in. “Monsieur Neuvillette, that’s … why would you ask me something like that?” 

“Oh dear, I hope I haven’t offended you. That was not my intention, little one. Please forgive me.” A pause, while he turns his head to press his lips against your hair again. “It is just that you are so shy and your body is so sensitive. I wondered if perhaps you were too ashamed to take care of your own needs in this manner, that’s all. I’ve heard some women are.” 

Lungs painfully constricting inside your chest, you stiffly lift your hands up to cover your face. Having the Iudex pet you so intimately was one thing, but discussing such matters with him was something else entirely! 

“P - please forgive me, monsieur … you haven’t offended me it’s just — I have no experience with this sort of thing. I do it, sometimes. Pleasure myself like that. But I’ve never had anyone else t - touch me in that way before …” 

“I see.” 

Silence settles over the room for a long, drawn out stretch that soon starts to ride the line of being uncomfortable. You can just start to feel the sting of hot tears creeping through at the corners of your eyes when he gently pats your cunt with the flats of his fingers, startling a surprised noise out of you. Lowering your hands enough to see, you gape down at yourself as he somewhat possessively cups his hand around you again and gives the pudge of your labia a light squeeze. 

“Such a silly thing you are.” He says against your head, displacing some of the little flyways there to send them dancing at your peripheral. You barely even notice it though, trembling at the faintest hint of a growl in his voice when it sets your guts to vibrate and seems to reverberate inside your chest cavity. You’d never heard him sound like that before but don’t get the chance to linger on that thought or question it, because he nuzzles further into you until it feels like he’s speaking directly into your ear now. “In the future you should try not to be so forthcoming with your body when it comes to men. Had I been any less honorable I could have all too easily taken advantage of you earlier and I could still do it now had I wanted to. I understand your desire for wrongs to be appropriately righted as that is the very foundation Fontaine was built on but this is not the way to go about it, mademoiselle.” 

Your mouth warbles open but nothing comes out. All you can do is sit there, quaking on monsieur Neuvillette’s lap, while his fingers slip into one side of your panties and tugs them aside. The sight of your own cunt lips, puffy and flushed with arousal, surprises a faltering animal noise out of you that seems to echo endlessly inside the room. He pays it little mind though and simply curls his thumb to brush over your slit and the clitoris hiding within, smearing sticky slick with that fine leather glove and nudging your body into opening up to him. Legs twitching, you jerk your hands down to latch onto the arm locked around your middle, clutching at him even as you fitfully writhe against the sensation. 

All at once your earlier arousal comes crashing back with a vengeance, temporarily forgotten but not near as snuffed out as you would have liked it to be. Your clit thrums under his stilted caress as if the climax you’d been close enough to taste but not able to experience had lain dormant this entire time while you ensured the water pitchers were filled, the snack tables stocked and the fireplaces were appropriately stoked wherever they were needed. It shocks you a great deal to realize how powerful your arousal truly is, and you buck your hips with a whiny moan that would have embarrassed you under better circumstances. 

But better circumstances would not have found your cunt absolutely flooding with a deluge of fresh slick, nor would your clit have been swelling as eagerly as it does. You can feel the meaty, engorged drag of it under the soft petting of his thumb, almost idly drawing it back and forth with a total lack of urgency that makes your head spin perhaps even more so than the sharp stabs of pleasure do. You wanted to cum, and the knowledge that he would not permit you to just makes you want it even more. 

“Please, monsieur —!” 

Softly humming, he presses his thumb down a bit more firmly. “Are you already getting close, little one?” 

You tip your head back to rest on his broad shoulder, panting up at the ceiling while shuddering waves of yet unrealized ecstasy crash over you, each somehow more powerful than the last. Instinctively, you inch your legs further apart even as they tremble fiercely for him and you think, idly, you probably would have vibrated right off him had he not been keeping you pinned against his front. You’re helpless to do anything except sensitively quake like this, and you do so with great enthusiasm. 

“It is too much … I - I can’t take it!” 

“You will.” He assures you, his voice soft again but it still carries that subtle hint of an edge underneath the surface. You didn’t understand it, why he would sound like that. What had brought it on. Was he even more displeased with you than he’d suggested? 

The thought alone brings tears to your eyes almost as much as the cresting pleasure making you writhe on his lap, and you squeeze your eyes shut to keep them at bay. You didn’t want to make him feel bad for causing you to cry when you were the one who had asked for this … but oh, it was so very hard not to give voice to the sobs threatening to wrack your body when it was all so much. The firm, weighty pressure of his thumb petting over your cunt, his other fingers idly teasing along your slit where they were still holding your panties aside. The smell of him, the taste of him lingering on the back of your tongue, his sturdy weight underneath you. It was all too much, and it felt like you were drowning in him. 

“Let this be a lesson to you,” He continues, unconcerned with the way you twist against him and choke on stuttering gasps. “Even more pressing than the matter with mister Danon, I’m far more concerned about how easily you gave yourself up to a man to do with however he pleased for the sake of penance. Needless self sacrifice is not justice, sweet girl. I do hope you’ll remember that.” 

Bending his head close once more, monsieur Neuvillette presses his mouth to your hammering pulse, and you mewl at the contact. It is not so much a kiss, you abruptly realize, as it is a not very subtle threat. Like there was a beast lurking beneath that kindly gentleman facade … 

“Oh, monsieur, I — I’m going to —“ 

“No, you are not.” He cuts across you, practically hisses it against your jugular, and you nearly jolt right off him when the arm around your middle slides up to lock across your front at an angle. Suddenly he pinches your nipple through your shirt where it’s stiff and straining against cotton, giving it a mean little tweak to make your back bow. Trying to twist away proves futile and you yelp at the pleasure laced pain even as your cunt drools even more obscenely in response. 

You felt like you were going crazy. Truly wild with potent, cloying arousal so powerful, so overwhelming, you can’t even process what’s happening to you while you shake right to the edge of your release. 

And just like that, the hand on your pussy retreats, pulling away altogether to leave your panties shamelessly askew in favor of latching onto the swell of your inner thigh and keeping them spread when you frantically buck your hips in search of that fleeting touch. You heave and groan, reeling at the total loss of friction, but it is useless. Monsieur Neuvillette is an unyielding presence at your back no matter how earnestly you squirm against him, and his gloved fingers give your aching teat another cruel tug to further stave off your release. 

You’re more than a bit horrified, in a delirious, hazy sort of way, to find that the pain serves its purpose in chasing away your climax enough to leave your pussy absolutely throbbing in the wake of this denial. No longer teetering right on the precipice, it seems to force you back a pace or two and all you can do is look on longingly at the promise of oblivion beyond with yearning and desperation. Wanting, but not allowed to have. 

You truly had underestimated just how tortuous this punishment technique could really be … 

Through the murky fever you feel monsieur Neuvillette brush his mouth across your cheek to press at the corner of your eye, effectively drawing you out of your groaning stupor. Sucking in a ragged gasp, you clutch at his arm all the tighter and try in vain to lean away. 

“M - monsieur?” 

“You’re crying.” 

Noising a soft sound of confusion, you blearily blink your eyes open to realize that they were in fact clouded with a swimming sheen of tears making them burn. Sniffling sadly, you start to reach up to swipe them away in shame but the hand on your breast comes up quicker and locks under your jaw, physically turning your face towards him. 

Laying spread out on top of him with your head forced back against his shoulder, you look up at monsieur Neuvillette from just a scant few millimeters away. His expression is still somber and unreadable but … the glint in his pale lilac eyes makes your chest hitch. It wasn’t hunger the same way you’d on occasion caught other men looking at you — men like mister Danon, you realize in retrospect — but it is a hunger all the same. Something old and primal, from a long forgotten dark age that inspires a slow curling tendril of uncertainty low in your gut. You don’t think it’s lust per se, not in the usual sense, but a kind of lust,  perhaps. One you didn’t have a name for. 

One you weren’t sure if you wanted to learn the true nature of. 

After silently studying you for a long moment, he finally drags his gaze from your face to regard the tall, stately clock standing sentry in the office, the only witness to this lurid state of affairs. “I still have some time before my meeting. I think we should be able to squeeze in one more session before I have to go.” 

You very nearly give voice to a hysterical, broken sob, just barely managing to choke it back with a frazzled whine instead. “Monsieur —“ 

“Hush, little one.” He murmurs and leans close again, stunned surprise washing over you when his tongue flicks out to lick up a wet tear from under your eye. You gape at him in shocked disbelief when he pulls back enough to look at you again, leaving behind residual moisture on your skin, but he doesn’t even look the least bit put out or sorry for it. Like it was a perfectly normal thing for him to be doing. Perhaps it was. You had no idea – and if he recognizes your surprised reaction for what it is, he certainly doesn’t show it. “You have nothing to fear from me. I will ensure your punishment is properly administered and then we shall further discuss your other behaviors in greater detail. Rest assured, you will be appropriately corrected in time. I will personally see to that myself.”

⭐

Crossposted: here

#genshin impact #neuvillette #neuvillete x reader #self insert bullshit

[beebfreeb]

I saw that you reblogged your comic from april(august?) mask and face! Id love to hear mlre about them

They are not my most developed OCs but you certainly can! The setting is sort of vague and fairytale like in my mind. Me and the entity possessing me except it's difficult to discern where I end and it begins, or who exactly is possessing who...

In their youth, Face realized that his face was... not actually his face, and instead a different Thing, a Mask. This was quite scary to discover and both of them opted for hiding it completely. Neither of them have ever been able to agree on which one is the original and which one is the demon possessing them. For a long time, it didn't matter, anyway... until "Emrys" became an independent adult, and Face decided to live how he wanted, while Mask was still worried about being seen as Normal. Mask is irritated by Face's failure to just Act Regular and Stop Changing Everything Around that's SCARY. Face is sick of the pressure to act like someone he's not.

Emrys/Face studied medicine in order to find a Cure for whatever is going on with him, but found that all forms of Exorcism seem quite painful, ineffective, and generally cruel. Whether or not Demons actually exist, or are something else, is heavily debated.

They don't like each other at all, but that doesn't matter they have to make money and eat food and all that.

#my ocs #mask and face #<- I don't actually know if I have anything else in this tag #ms paint #beebfreeb art tag #Emrys/Face goes by he/him (transgender) Mask doesn't care. #I think all of their problems would be solved by bagel and cream cheese.

[msfantasy]

Time Traveller

Summary: a short on how Y/n travels back in time and meets her younger husband.

Ominis Gaunt x reader

Ominis would typically wish that he was anywhere else but here.

Tonight, however, is different. Tonight the Gaunt family is joined at the diner table by a special guest, who just so happens to be a ‘distant’ relative from the future. When she first step through the manor, she had explained she is a Gaunt by marriage only to non-other than Ominis himself. He found it incredibly difficult to fathom such a concept.

Yet here we are.

Sitting next to her, he can smell a faint whiff of her intoxicating perfume. One cannot possibly smell this delightful.

She is obviously not capable of maintaining a refined composure as she continues to fidget in her seat as she fiddles with the objects around her. She often starts rattling off random pieces of small talk to fill the awkward silence which she is clearly not use to.

Ominis can sense his mothers growing irritations with the woman’s insistent restlessness. Afraid of the poor woman was about to suffer his mothers wrath. He reaches his hand out, placing a firm palm on her arm. He was about to gently tell her to ease up. Only she quickly shuts her mouth after muttering her apologies.

This takes Ominis aback. How had she known what he was about to say?

Regardless, Ominis mother makes an excuse and departs the dining table that evening along with his father.

Bored Marvolo bids a good evening, retiring to his room leaving Ominis and Y/n alone at the dinner table together.

“I’m sorry- I’m just not use to this level of quite.” She says leaning towards the milky eyed boy. A small smile crosses his face. “You know how it is… we’ll actually I suppose you don’t yet.” She heaves a heavy as leans in bonking her head into his shoulder. “Dear Merlin- I miss you so much. It’s odd isn’t it? Missing you and yet you’re next to me.”

“I suppose we have a loving marriage then?” He asks with amusement.

“Oh wow… if you knew what you’re like in future… you’d understand why that question is so funny.” A small laugh escapes him, finding great difficulty in imagining himself in a love sick state.

Ominis sits back in his seat, unable to comprehend a happy life. For such a long time, Ominis had come to terms with the cards life had dealt him. He was incredibly glad to hear that life does get better. “Please… I know you cannot overshare but please, tell me if I am happy… truely happy?”

The woman snakes her comforting arms around his shoulders and brings him into a tender hold against her chest. He was about to protest at her intrusive hold until he was cut off as she hushes his thoughts and pats loving strokes down his head. “This is how I hold our children when they’re upset or sick. Sometimes this is how I hold you at night when you had a bad day at work.” A blush of embarrassment crossed his cheeks. Surely, he doesn’t have his wife hold him in such a childish manner. Turning her head she places a chaste kiss on his temple the way mothers do when leaving their children on platform 9 3/4.

She’s so loving, so maternal, so safe. Ominis feels utterly safe in her arms. Merlin- he never wants her to let go of him, but she does release him from her grasp.

Her touch recedes leaving him desperate for her hold once again.

“Ominis my love?” She calls for his attention cupping his jaw. “I am filled with such sorrow, seeing how your life was. Just remember it won’t be long.” She stands pulling away from Ominis. His skin feels cold at her absence.

A colourful swirl opens up in the living room, a portal opens calling for the woman to return. “Wait! Tell me how I win your heart.” Ominis asked with slight desperation filling his voice.

A soft giggles escapes her lips. “The very first moment I beheld you, my heart was irrevocably gone.”

She steps through the swirl and was surrounded by darkness, she continues her journey in the aimless direction until a hazy imagine appears becoming more discernible with each step.

A man stands before her, his arms held open, patiently waiting for her to return into his embrace. Ramming into the man, she holds him in great desperation. “Offt!” He grunts at the force of her embrace. “You were only gone a day my love.” Ominis coos running his fingers through her rich hair.

J“A day too long.” She whispers as she buries her face into his shirt.

#Ominis gaunt x reader #Ominis gaunt imagine #Ominis gaunt x you #ominis gaunt x y/n #ominis gaunt x mc #Ominis x reader #Ominis imagine #Ominis x you #ominis x y/n #ominis x mc #hogwarts legacy imagine #hogwarts legacy x reader #hogwarts legacy

[foolishlyzephyrus]

———

This was a very silly goofy post I enjoyed but it also sparked genuine curiosity: how accurate is this? I’m a data hound, so I did some fact checking. Please be aware I am by no means an expert and this was simply a result of some cursory investigating and inputting stuff into a calculator.

For RTD, I took it to mean any episode title that was singular. Only eight out of the sixty episodes of RTD’s run have one word titles, with six having two syllables (Dalek, Doomsday, Gridlock, 42, Utopia, and Midnight) and the other two being monosyllabic (Rose and Blink). That’s roughly 13% of his episodes. Definitely a trend but he was actually quite creative with his titles. Here’s some other fun statistical stuff: the most popular words in episode titles appear to be ‘dead’ (The Unquiet Dead, Forest of the Dead and Planet of The Dead), ‘planet’ (Impossible Planet, Planet of the Ood, Planet of the Dead) and ‘time’ (Last of the Time Lords, End of Time Part 1 and End of Time Part 2) occurring at about 5% each, with ‘earth’ and ‘doctor’ occurring twice each respectively.

For Moffat, I went a little more broad, considering any episode that used the naming convention ‘of’/‘of the’ or featured ‘doctor’ in any capacity. Out of the eighty-four episodes in his run, twenty six filled the criteria, that’s about 31%. Eighteen adhered to the ‘of’ requirement (Victory of the Daleks, The Time of Angels, The Vampires of Venice, Day of the Moon, Curse of the Black Spot, The Wedding of River Song, Asylum of the Daleks, The Power of Three, The Bells of Saint John, The Rings of Akhaten, Journey to the Center of the TARDIS, Robot of Sherwood, In the Forest of the Night, The Husbands of River Song, The Pyramid at the End of the World, The Lie of the Land, The Empress of Mars, and The Eaters of Light), four contained the word ‘doctor’ (Vincent and the Doctor, The Doctor’s Wife, The Doctor, the Widow and the Wardrobe, and The Doctor Falls), and four fit into both categories (The Name of the Doctor, The Day of the Doctor, The Time of the Doctor and The Return of Doctor Mysterio; it’s funny once you realize that Name, Day and Time were all released sequentially). The claim is thereby substantiated, the man loves his ‘of’s’.

Chibnall’s criteria was difficult to discern but I decided on anything that contained the name of a Who monster classic or otherwise, was a part, or similarly used ‘of’/‘of the’. My findings were quite interesting as there was bunch of overlap between my selected categories. As a whole, out of the thirty-one episodes in Chibnall’s run, eighteen fit the criteria. That’s an overwhelming 58%, so it is most definitely correct assumption. In terms of part episodes, there were eight as there are two proper parted episodes (Spyfall, Part 1 and Spyfall, Part 2) and the serialized six-episode Flux series. Thirteen episodes contain ‘of’/‘of the’ with six exclusively using ‘of’/‘of the’ (The Demons of the Punjab, The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos, Nikola Tesla’s Night of Terror, The Haunting of Villa Diodati, Chapter Five: Survivors of the Flux, Power of The Doctor). This is where it gets interesting, as the remaining seven episodes containing ‘of’ are all the Who monster episodes (Ascension of the Cybermen, Revolution of the Daleks, Fugitive of the Judoon, Chapter Two: War of the Sontarans, Chapter Four: Village of the Angels, Eve of the Daleks, Legend of the Sea Devils). It would appear that Chibnall is an equal fiend for ‘of’s’, especially considering the monsters. So, very on brand for classic who naming conventions as well.

To conclude, it was a largely factual silly goofy post (props to @fanonical) and I enjoyed my little data collection exercise.

#doctor who #dw #dr who #steven moffat #rtd #chris chibnall #new who #episode data #i don’t know what research demon possessed me but here we are #i am normally not interested in statistics #i am not a math guy until it’s something i am interested in #please appreciate this rabbit hole i went down

[ggulmul]

For me, the ‘dog scratch’ falls into the same category as a few other recent instances of intriguing circumstances that lend themselves to certain interpretations, but are ultimately inconclusive.

In this case, we have Jimin showing up with a scratch that’s very reminiscent of one caused by a sizable dog. This, shortly after Jungkook posted a photo of Bam at the training centre, perhaps implying that he was there to take him home. The scratch would have to be relatively recent for it to still retain that flush and raised appearance. Would it still look like that after travelling from someone’s his home to Incheon? I don’t know. But it’s a compelling coincidence.

I feel similarly about Jungkook’s little laundry live. As he was meticulously folding his new Calvin Klein underwear, eagle-eyed viewers noticed a pair that was significantly smaller than the rest. Of course, there could be many explanations for this. Jungkook said the underwear had been sent by the brand, so the inclusion of the smaller undies could have been a simple mistake on their part. After all, they probably wouldn’t be ‘in the know,’ nor gifting Jungkook briefs for his partner.

But it’s possible Jungkook wasn’t only washing brand new clothes, it’s hard to say. In any case, the red briefs looked like they would fit very uncomfortably on Jungkook, so if they were indeed intended for him one might expect at least a slight reaction on his end as he was folding them. But it pretty much just seemed like he was folding a smaller someone’s underwear without any further thought.

(Again, this is not to be taken too seriously. Or seriously at all, really. It’s just a bit interesting).

Then there’s Jimin’s at-home live after he reached number one on Billboard Hot 100, during which he had a few cases of bad luck. The first being when —I assume— Jimin didn’t think his voice would get picked up by the phone mic if he whispered. But the “빨리 가” (“go quickly”) is quite discernible. And while the subsequent noises are more difficult to distinguish, they corroborate the idea of another person being present. The second instance of bad luck happened when he accidentally revealed a second gaming chair next to his own, leaving him a bit flustered (poor bb).

In the same live we also get Jimin’s slightly flippant response of “I think Jungkook’s asleep” to a comment reading “I’m Jungkook’s wife” (or something like that). These dots could connect to form a certain picture, such as Jungkook being there with Jimin when he started the live, sitting in the other gaming chair. The sounds we hear could be caused by Jungkook sliding the chair back and exiting the room after Jimin urged him to go. He may have been heading off to bed, prompting Jimin to say what he did with a certain confidence.

Ultimately though, it’s all circumstantial; there’s nothing that actually ties these events together except a few ambiguous facts and our prior beliefs about the status of Jikook’s relationship. But I think it’s fine to hypothesise as long as nothing’s taken as fact, or blown out of proportion in terms of its significance.

And, after all, enough circumstances can add up to be quite telling.

#jikook

[mybeingthere]

JAN C SCHLEGEL -

OF ALIENS, MERMAIDS AND MEDUSAS

Platinum Prints, limited edition of 5 in the size of 56x76cm (Arches Platinum Rag).

A folio of 12 plates (plus cover page) is available as limited edition of 3

The series „of Aliens, Mermaids and Medusas" was inspired by imagination itself.

Today it seems as if its influence on people is losing its power because we begin to forget or stop noticing how imagination can change our lives. It is the way people approach all kinds of problems with creativity.

We live in a time of crisis when everything in the world has been turned upside down by global warming, ocean pollution, the coronavirus pandemic, and wars (just to mention a few). We have to deal with everyday problems, and this is quite difficult in a state of anxiety. In addition, we are attacked by negative news, and in this information noise, the voice of our imagination that helps us to cope mentally is drowned out.

We do not mean an escape from reality to completely lose touch with it, but a deeper dive into your inner world, where the answers to all questions lie. The ability to imagine, to think outside the box, encourages us to change for the better.

How long ago have you been peering into quirky, chaotic at first glance patterns to discern unusual images in them? How long ago have you laid with a friend on the grass, looking up at the sky and saying, "That cloud looks like a jumping tiger!"? Jan C Schlegel's series of photographs will help you revive your imagination. Just take a closer look at the most primitive, yet incredibly complex creatures: jellyfish.

Jellyfish appeared long before the dinosaurs. They inhabited the ocean 500-700 million years ago, at the dawn of life on Earth. They have no blood, bones or brain, but thanks to evolution, these organisms have developed very cunning methods of adaptation, some secrets of which scientists have not yet managed to unravel. Bizarre camouflage is the most understandable means of adaptation. But there are many unsolved mysteries. Why would a sea creature without a brain need eyes? How can some individuals transform from adult jellyfish to polyps without any limitations, thereby repeating the life cycle and providing themselves with actual immortality?

To date, scientists have described nearly 3,200 species of jellyfish, and the number is only growing every year. The in-depth study of jellyfish has made it possible to advance in solving the ecological problem of plastic emissions into the ocean. Geneticists are grappling with the question of immortality and suggest that the very same immortal jellyfish will help them get a little closer to answering this important question.

It was these amazing, little-studied creatures that attracted the attention of Jan C Schlegel, and he has attempted to show them from a different perspective. The project was photographed in Germany, at the artist’s house, and the Two Oceans Aquarium in Cape Town, South Africa.

The jellyfish placed in large aquariums moved chaotically, and their movements were meditative and calming. These are the moments when the magic of the imagination happens. The relaxed mind is attuned to observation. The smooth movements of the jellyfish seemed to show some pictures, and Jan only had to follow them and catch the moment.

Each person has their own unique experience, so we guess you'll see something of your own. You can look at the jellyfish silhouette as a whole or you can gaze at a particular element. You can focus on the pattern of the tentacles or the unusual fibers that make up the jellyfish's pileus. All of Jan's photos are chosen so that with a little effort you can see something really unexpected. Just take a closer look.

Let's consider one example that might help you engage your imagination at Jan C Schlegel's series. The box jellyfish, considered one of the most dangerous creatures on Earth, has another name: the sea wasp. Its venom can kill an adult in a few minutes if the victim is not treated in time. And yet in the photo from the series „of Aliens, Mermaids and Medusas“ she appears in a slightly different guise, more peaceful. The pattern of her head resembles the gaze of an elephant. As soon as you notice this look, your imagination will add the recognizable elephant skin texture and it will be very hard to get rid of this image, it will stay in your memory for a long time.

There is no point in telling what Jan l saw in all these amazing creatures. We'll just ask a few guiding questions to stimulate your imagination. Could you see a single jellyfish as a forest on a lonely planet? Would you have thought of the idea that a close friendship might develop between a jellyfish and a fish? Or maybe some picture reminded you of your childhood fears when you didn't want to get out from under the covers, being afraid of the monster under the bed? Would you find a woman's profile in one of Jan C Schlegel's works? As you look at the dancing tentacles, will you hear a melody dear to your heart?

The Series is dedicated to Ksenia Chapkayeva who also wrote this introduction. Her inspiration, encouragement and support were vital to see the series realized.

[pitviperofdoom]

OC picrews!

These are all from my main storyverse, Sacred Darkness or SDverse.

Picrews used:

1, 2, 3

Caleb Cooper:

This is the guy whose backstory keeps changing to make it sadder. He likes Jane Austen novels and hates feeling like a failure. Which he does. A lot.

Jack:

Jack is extremely difficult to make in picrews thanks to how weird his design has gotten over the years. This isn't even that accurate because he's supposed to have different skin tones between the stitches. Fun fact, this picrew game makes you choose between a face scar and a neck scar, so I just made two versions and put them together in MS Paint.

He likes poetry and music and his friends and the smell of green tea, and hates being talked over.

Sarah Cheung:

I used to do a lot more with Sarah; at one point I entered her into one of those OC art tournaments, but I dropped out after a couple rounds.

She likes singing and hates not being able to help when people are sad.

Rita Cheung Pruitt:

Rita's another OC that's gone through quite a bit of change, though I haven't talked about her nearly as much on Tumblr, if at all. As much as I love the sushicore picrew, there's only one body type option and Rita's supposed to be fat. It's hard to find picrews that look good and have more plus-size options.

She likes gardening and collecting animal bones, and hates littering.

Ryan Cheung Pruitt:

I used to roleplay with this guy. If you're wondering if I went for bisexual lighting on purpose, the answer is yes.

He likes arts and crafts and hates awkward social situations.

Maya Robinson:

Maya's just a cool werewolf lesbian that I'm very fond of.

She likes camping and collecting animal bones, and hates feeling like she's missing out.

Jake Molina:

Jake's one of the OCs I've talked about the least. He was pretty generic for a while, with his only discerning features being 'gay" and "telepathic", but at some point I was like "you know what this story's missing? A goth with a heart of gold" and Jake was enough of a blank slate for me to slap that on him and start turning him into an actual person.

He likes fibercrafts and hates big crowds.

Zuri Sullivan:

Out of all my characters, Zuri's been through the most change since her initial conception because proto-Zuri was a white boy whose name has been lost to time. The eyepatch is supposed to be on the left. The stuffed cat is plot-relevant.

She likes making plushies, and hates loud voices and the feeling of velvet.

#sdverse #undead bros #original characters #picrew

[strixcattus]

I mentioned wanting to post about my other STP AUs and then never actually followed up with that beyond some general notes on my D&D-esque AU, so here's a more specific rundown of the Voices:

Hero: A run-of-the-mill fighter from a small farming village on the west coast of the continent. Allegedly he was prophesied to do... something (still unclear on what, but the word "slay" was definitely involved), but he's not sure if he believes in that sort of thing. Somehow he ends up taking on quests with Cold and Stubborn far too often for comfort. Increasingly convinced he's the only normal person here.

Cold: A cold-blooded assassin and general blade-for-hire who only takes on jobs he finds interesting. In another time, he was less picky about whom he was assigned to kill, but he's grown discerning with time. He's only killed one noble in recent years before deciding to focus on more difficult targets... but she doesn't seem keen on leaving him alone. Most of his past is a mystery to everyone but Hero, though most people don't exactly feel like asking about it.

Stubborn: A textbook barbarian who decided never to die one day and hasn't changed his mind since. Tends to take on quests alongside Cold since their desires for an interesting fight line up... though Cold may or may not always appreciate the help. He met some sort of half-demon a few years back who had the same kind of loose relationship with death, and ever since they meet up every few months to kill each other. For some reason, most people think this is weird.

Contrarian: One of three recent bard-college graduates in the party. His specialty is theater and improvisation, particularly of a satirical sort. It hasn't even been a year since graduation and he's already banned from one of the northern kingdoms due to The Play. He's also banned from explaining what exactly was so offensive about The Play, and this one might be magically enforced, so best not to risk it. Of the bards, he's the most magically talented, though he mainly uses his talents for pranks.

Smitten: The second of three recent graduates. His specialties are the lute (which he's actually quite good at), romantic poetry (eh...), and singing/songwriting (no.). The most anyone can really get him to open up about his past is that he's from an island kingdom to the east and didn't grow up with any other beastfolk. "Smitten" isn't actually his real name, but not even Contrarian and Opportunist know what it really is.

Opportunist: The third of the recent graduates. He's a bit of a jack-of-all trades and fairly average at magic. It's mostly his fault that the three of them didn't manage to meet up again until they'd been tasked with killing a bunch of Princesses, because less than a month after graduation he got on the wrong side of a witch, was cursed into the form of a frog, and, being too proud to seek help, had to figure out how to either break the curse or turn back to his normal form on his own.

Hunted: I haven't fully figured out what's going on with him. He's a ranger who's been tracking a mysterious beast throughout the western forest—he's pretty sure there's some bounty put forth by one of the kingdoms within the forest, but his quest is mostly personal. He recently acquired an animal companion (a raven) to help him hunt down the beast, but only learned after the fact that the "animal companion" was A: sapient, and B: unable to fly.

Broken: He's been flightless since before he showed up at the first familiar-shop, and the constant cycle of being adopted by some aspiring wizard or ranger, then being cast out once they realized they'd been misled didn't do him any favors. It doesn't seem to be the result of an injury, though—he seems to know the real cause, but he isn't talking. At least the ranger who adopted him this time seems to be more understanding than the others.

Cheated: A solo adventurer who tends not to stick with a single party for very long. He's a warlock, allegedly, and he'll tell the story to anyone to asks of why you should stay far, far away from suspicious-sounding maidens in the woods, but no one has actually seen him use any spells. He frequents the tavern where Skeptic works—it's a more permanent fixture in his life than any party he's worked with.

Skeptic: He's not an adventurer himself—he runs an adventurers' tavern in the western woods, and has become acquainted with most of the others through his business. It's an underappreciated job, and it's a lot of work to ensure shady characters can't mess up the system, but adventurers tip pretty well. You just have to make sure the "No change" sign is visible, so they can't demand that you find some way to split the gold pieces that are the only currency they carry. Skeptic tends to stay distant from customers, though, with his only close confidant being the wizard outside town.

Paranoid: He had a reputation as a shut-in even before he started refusing to set foot outside his tower a few weeks back. But even more so, he has a reputation as being the best healing wizard in his part of the western woods—mainly by virtue of being the only healing wizard in his part of the woods, but he is very skilled. And driven. He was the first Voice to properly slay a Princess, even before the others formed their party.

The only problem is, whatever he killed in his tower basement doesn't seem to have been content to stay dead.

#slay the princess #stp d&d au #the voices #I actually have a decent amount of worldbuilding for this one #I just never shared it #I have a map even but it's a recent creation and might be subject to change

[pkmnprofloblolly]

Hello, saw your post about fox pokemon. What exactly are eevee? Always grouped 'em in with fox pokemon. Are they atleast canine like?

that's more of a loaded question than you might think! for a very long time, where eevee rests on the mammalian family tree is the sort of thing you could ask 10 biologists and get 13 answers, and maybe a shouting match. eevee has wildly variable internal features that make placing it in a certain spot really difficult- i'm talking like minute differences in the shapes of bones that would usually be used to identify certain groups. you might think that with the discovery of dna we'd be able to definitively place it where it belongs, but eevee's genetic makeup is remarkably plastic (changeable) and unstable. there's even quite a bit of research looking into cancer prevention based on its genome because of that (the species isn't immune to cancer, but has a much lower incidence of it than you'd expect given its penchant for frequent mutation).

so, let's talk about some mammals! particularly, a large group called the carnivora.

(note that "carnivora" or "carnivoran" sound similar to but do not mean the same thing as "carnivore". carnivores are any animal that eats meat, while carnivorans (members of the carnivora) belong to a specific branch of the mammal family tree. most carnivorans are indeed carnivores, but not all.)

so, carnivora! almost every person that's proposed a place on the mammalian family tree for eevee has placed it in or near the carnivorans. it's a group that is made up of two smaller clades: the feliforma (the cat-like carnivorans) and the caniforma (the dog-like carnivorans). the feliforma includes groups like the cats, hyenas, and mongooses. the caniforma includes groups like the dogs, bears, weasels, and seals.

some examples of the feliforms on the left, and caniforms on the right. of the feliforms we have pyroar and meowstic (cats), mightyena (a hyena), and yungoos (a mongoose). of the caniforms we have houndour (a dog), buizel (an otter), sealeo (despite the name, it is a walrus), ursaring (a bear), and zorua (a fox). you hear that right, mightyena is closer to a cat than a dog, and yungoos is entirely unrelated from mustelids (ie weasels, otters, badgers) like buizel or furret.

for an example of what i mean with the thing about eevee's weird morphology defying classification- there's this bit of bone on either side of the bottom of the mammalian skull called the "tympanic bulla" (basically just "Ear Balloon", since it's a hollow chamber). caniforms have only one chamber in their ear balloons, and feliforms have two chambers. eevee has.. both, somehow. if you took 2 eevee skulls and looked at their tympanic bullae, you might find that one has one chamber and one has two. that's.. really weird, just so everybody knows. that sort of thing isn't something you see in basically anything but eevee, same goes for its wildly variable genome.

so, is eevee a caniform, a feliform, or something else? our best answer came in the form of three extremely well-preserved fossils from the johto region, dating back to about 44 MYA, just a few million years before the feliform and caniform branches actually separated.

three pokemon were found, exceptionally preserved- including soft tissues!-, all together. they'd been buried in a mudslide and fossilized right next to/on top of each other, the mineral content of the soil just right to discourage bacterial growth, allowing the soft tissues to stay intact and fossilize as-is.

the fossils were collected and CT scanned to see the bones within the mineralized soft tissues- each of the three individuals appeared to be the same species, with near-identical skeletons. none of the skeletons showed type characteristics (like lignin or metallic structure), making type hard to discern. but what we could tell from the bones is that these were animals just outside of the carnivora- closely related to the ancestors of all carnivorans. and excitingly, they bared a close resemblance to a few skeletal features found only in eevee.

despite the homogeneity of their bones, the fossilized pokemon's soft tissues differed- the fur, in color and pattern (the fossilized fur no longer retains its color, but by looking at microscopic pigment cells within preserved fur and feathers we can deduce color and pattern!) and certain organs- around the throat area, each individual had an elemental organ like many pokemon today use to fuel and store energy for their typed attacks. each of the three fossilized pokemon's throat organ was different in elemental specialization: one fire, one water, and one electric.

(reconstructions of the three pokemon in question. top electric, left fire, and right water.)

see where i'm going, here? it's unknown if the three individuals represent three different evolutions, or three differently typed forms (like oricorio) of a singular pokemon, and a pre-evolved form is not yet known, if it existed at all. but we can say with some confidence that these guys may well have been ancestors of eevee as we know it today, which places eevee within the non-carnivoran carnivoraforms- something that emerged before the feliforma and caniforma existed, with traits found in both and found in neither.

#art #pkmn #pkmn irl #eevee #pkmn rp