Imagine you and your F/o sliding on hardwood floors with slippers or socks on. Maybe both of you form an elaborate dance routine or do silly poses as you slide by each other. Don’t worry, your F/o will be there to catch you if you fall. Or you might have to catch them 😅
[Proship DNI!!!]
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obligatory welcome guide for redditors
A lot of the guides I've seen don't actually seem to understand how reddit works in comparison to tumblr so
your blog is basically your own small subreddit. some people curate this heavily to fit a theme, like a sub, most people don't
reblogs are culturally equivilant to upvotes but functionally equvilant to crossposting
there is an algorithm. it sucks and nobody uses it. turn it off in settings. everything is generally chronological
likes are functionally equivilant to saving a post
you've probably already seen this but change your icon and put something in your bio or people WILL assume you're a bot. personal info not required
generally, anything you would put as a comment on a thread should go in the tags or the replies of a post. only add comments in reblogs if you want it to become part of the base post
tags are mostly equivilant to flairs, used for organization and commentary
your dashboard is an aggregation of everyone you follow
there is an r/all equivilant(trending page) but it sucks and nobody uses it
our search also sucks. your best bet is using tumblr.com/tagged/[TAG] and not /search
there are no mods
by extension, reporting something doesn't put it in front of the mods, it sends it to staff, who may or may not do anything(usually they don't)
there is no karma, there are no karma limits. anyone can reblog anything, comment/reply to anything, or post in any tag
"reposting"(reblogging) old content doesn't matter. people can and will reblog the same post multiple times, including in a row
CAVEAT. reposting someones art(NOT reblogging, making a new post) is a dick move. i know this is commonplace on fandom subs but its not necessary here. everything you post should be [OC] unless you are reblogging. or posting shitty memes
we have our own sitelore, you'll pick it up
(though im not opposed to bringing some over from reddit)
our app also sucks. we do not have third party apps and any that claim to be are scams. sorry
for desktop, most people use the XKit Rewritten extension for QoL improvements and to revert shitty aesthetic updates, much like old.reddit
we have no idea where the porn rules are at either. add a mature content flag to anything you'd get fired for looking at at work, that's about it
finally, from the bottom of my heart, fuck u/spez
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
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I'm scrolling through some ambient noises to help me write, and it got me thinking. Y'know those white noise machines people use for sleeping?
Do you think there's a very specific brand marketed at Gothamites?
Like everyone else has rainy nights on the beach, whale song, the crackle of the campfire, and everyone's all-time favorite "rickety fan about to oscillate off your shitty ikea desk at four in the morning."
And then there's "The Sounds of Gotham," a nighttime ambiance made up of heavy thunderstorms interspaced with the wail of police sirens and the occasional smattering of gunfire.
If you upgrade to premium, you can get the added sound effect of "small vigilante child dropping onto your apartment roof followed by the heavy pitter-patter of their combat boots as they dropkick a criminal off the fire escape."
Mm. Cozy.
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