#we could’ve had it all. it could’ve been so good

[atlabeth]

pretty boy

pairing: spencer reid x reader

summary: spencer walks in one day with a new look. you handle it pretty well.

a/n: im in the opposite of a writing slump right now (will prob fall into a writing slump right after i say this) probably because im procrastinating on essays for school and i can only write when im meant to be doing work. but tiny little fluffy spencer one shots are very good for the soul right now. i think it's my way of healing from my hotch fic

wc: 1.8k

warning(s): one slightly sexual joke from emily. all fluff

You usually don’t get to the office this early, but you don’t exactly have a choice. The BAU’s last couple cases have all run one after another, barely leaving you any time in the office, and now you’re paying for it. 

You’ve got a mountain of paperwork to get through and not nearly enough time to do it all—if you’re lucky, you’ll be writing reports for a few days straight. If you’re not, you’ll be putting in some overtime.  

“This is the most focused I’ve ever seen you this early,” Derek comments. 

You shake your head with a sigh. “These reports are government mandated torture.” 

He chuckles, and he nods at Emily as she walks over to her desk. “Are you this busy?” 

She shakes her head. “I’ve still got a report to get through, but nothing that bad.” 

“I get it,” you say wryly. “You’re all more organized than me. Just don’t come to me asking to go out tonight—you know I can’t say no.” 

“But don’t shots taste better when you’re supposed to be doing work?” Derek asks, and you roll your eyes with a laugh. 

“Not when I’ve got this much work I’m supposed to be doing.” 

You hear the elevator ding and glance up—Spencer’s walking through and fixing his tie. You look back down at your report as you greet him. 

“Hey, Spence,” you call. “Why’re you late?” 

“I’m not late,” he says, and you can see him checking his watch out of your peripherals. “I’m two minutes and thirty-three seconds early.” 

“Really?” you muse. “I guess I’m just so used to you being here before me.” 

“You can’t judge my timeliness on yours when you’ve been here for an hour already,” Spencer says. 

You frown, tapping your pen against the paper. “How do you know?” 

“You’re settled in already. Your coat’s on your chair, your stack of unfinished files is smaller than it was last time we were in the office, your coffee isn’t steaming, and your mug has a chipped handle—when they were put away last night, that one was set in the front, so you’d have to be here early to get it.” 

“Touche,” you murmur. You’re not sure why you ever ask your team of profilers how they know something. 

“You also look like you don’t want to be here,” he comments. “That’s pretty typical of agents who have to be here before their regular hours.” 

You chuckle and tilt your head in admission. You don’t really want to be here, especially running on so few hours of sleep. 

“Why aren’t you as early as usual?” Emily asks. 

“My neighbor knocked on my door this morning to ask me for something,” Spencer says. “It threw off my whole routine. I picked the wrong tie, I couldn’t pack my bag properly, and I had to toast my bagel for two minutes instead of three and a half to make it out in time.” 

“How terrible,” Derek says with mock austerity. 

“It is terrible!” he exclaims. “It’s scientifically proven that a morning routine makes you happier, more energized, and ready to seize the day—carpe diem.” Spencer sets his bag on the floor next to his desk and looks at everyone else with a smile. “Did you know that phrase was actually coined by the Roman poet Horace in his Odes? It comes from the first book out of four in the eleventh poem—the full phrase in Latin is carpe diem, quam mini—”

“How was your bagel?” Emily asks to interrupt him, and he pauses. 

“It was good,” he says. “Could’ve been toastier.” 

You look up, a teasing remark on the edge of your tongue, but the words die in your throat when you actually see him. 

Spencer’s started combing a hand through his hair to fix it—must have been another part of his affected morning routine—his lips set in a pout as he tries to see his reflection in his dark monitor. He always looks good, even without trying, but now—

“You’re wearing glasses,” you say dumbly. 

“My contacts dried out,” he grumbles, still focused on his hair. “We got home so late last night I forgot to put them in their solution, and I had no time to fix them because my neighbor messed up my whole morning.” 

You nod, still unable to tear your eyes away from him. “Are you gonna keep wearing them?” 

“I don’t know. Contacts are better for cases because I’m not worried about them falling off or fogging up, but I usually sleep on the jet on the way back, and sleeping with contacts in isn’t good.” He smiles a bit as he fully turns to you, seemingly satisfied with his hair. “It reduces the amount of oxygen that gets to your cornea, which damages the cornea’s surface and makes it harder to regenerate new cells. Sleeping with contacts actually makes you six to eight times more likely to get an eye infection.”

You nod again, your brain still not quite working at full power. You always love listening to Spencer’s fact dumps—it gives you a lot of material to impress your non-BAU friends with on the side, and you’re eternally thankful for that—but right now, you seriously cannot focus. 

You’d never really thought about him in glasses, but that’s probably a good thing if this is how it makes you feel. 

You were valedictorian as an undergrad, and you received stellar feedback from your professors during your masters program. You’re an excellent profiler, a valued member of the BAU, and you’re a goddamn FBI agent. 

And yet you can’t find a single thought in your head because your coworker showed up to work wearing glasses. 

He’s still rambling about other common causes of eye infection and how nobody seems to take them as seriously as they should, when Derek, not even trying to hide his grin at your turmoil, speaks up.  

“Reid. Wanna cool it a bit?” 

Spencer’s eyes dart over to him for a moment before he stops. “Uh— sorry.” He frowns as he looks back at you. “Why do you ask? Do you not like them?” 

“No,” you blurt out, and you shake your head a multitude of times. “No. They look great. You look great. They’re—” You dig your nails hard into your palm as you try your hardest to smile like normal, and this time you nod. “They’re good, Spence.” 

“Thanks.” Spencer does that little smile-nod combo of his, and he pushes his glasses back into place with his thumb by the bottom of the frames. “That’s nice to know I’ve got another option.” 

You thank whatever god may be out there that Hotch and Penelope are busy in their offices and JJ is busy with some other case, because you think you would die if anyone else saw you like this. 

“Hey, Reid,” Emily says, also not doing a very good job of hiding her amusement. You hate your team sometimes. “They’re almost out of sugar in the breakroom. If you want coffee the way you like it this morning, you should probably get in there.” 

“What?” Spencer shoots up, his brows already furrowing into a frown. “That— that’s ridiculous. I can’t mess up my morning any more.” 

“You’d better get in there, then,” she remarks. 

“We’re an entire office of agents running on coffee,” Spencer complains as he starts walking. “How are we almost out of sugar?” 

“Because half of ‘em drink it black,” Derek says, and Spencer shakes his head with a sigh as he leaves. 

“That’s ridiculous.” 

You bury your head in your hands the moment he’s gone and Derek laughs. “I wish I could’ve gotten that on video.” 

“Don’t talk to me,” you groan. “It is not fair of him to walk in like that.” 

“And that is why I call him pretty boy.”

“He needs them to see,” Emily says with amusement as she leans against the side of your desk. “You just can’t control yourself.” 

“I need to transfer offices,” you say, shaking your head. “I can’t do this.” 

“You should ask him out!” Derek encourages. “He’d probably say yes.” 

“Absolutely not,” you insist. “I doubt he likes me like that. A— and even if he does, that’s the last thing either of us need right now.” 

“I don’t know,” Emily muses. “It looks like you clearly need something.” 

You let out a frustrated noise as you screw your eyes shut. “I’m doomed.” 

You hear Spencer say your name, and when you look over at him, one hand still pressed against your head, you see he’s got two cups of coffee in his hands. “Are you okay?” 

“Yeah,” you say weakly. “I’m great. Why?” 

“I got you one too,” he says, holding one of the mugs out to you. “The one you have is probably cold by now, and it looks like you need an extra kick to get through all those reports.” 

“Thanks, Spence. That’s sweet.” He nods as you take the proffered mug, and you swear your cheeks are as warm as the coffee. He is really testing your strength today. 

“You— you have a lot,” he says, and you huff a dry laugh and nod. “I’m not trying to be sarcastic. I could take half of them if you want?” 

Your grip tightens on the mug and you can feel Derek’s eyes on you. “I couldn’t make you do that, Spence.” 

“You’re not!” Spencer exclaims. “I can get through mine really quickly—we worked together for almost the whole last case so I can do all of that anyways.” 

“...You’re sure it wouldn’t be an imposition?” 

“I’m sure,” he nods. “Besides, I offered. I wouldn’t if I didn’t want to.” 

And god damn him, because he nudges his glasses back into place again, pushes a strand of loose hair back into place. You’re dying over here. 

You set the mug of coffee on your desk and pick up the top half of your pile. “All yours, Spence.” 

He takes the bottom half and smiles at you, and you smile back before he walks back to his desk. You are dying over here. 

“Let me know how I can pay you back,” you say, and he shakes his head. 

“You don’t need to pay me back.” 

“Really?” 

Spencer nods. “I mean, Morgan invited us all out on the jet last night, and I don’t think I can do it alone. If you can get out of the office in time, I don’t have to. I think that's enough of a payback.” 

“Yeah,” you say. “I’ll be there.” 

He smiles again and nods, then he picks up a pen and focuses in. You turn back to your desk, your face burning. 

“What was that about him not liking you like that?” Derek says. 

“Quiet!” you whisper-yell, swatting him with the pile of files in your hand. “He might hear you!” 

“He’s not hearing anything while he’s focused on that,” he says. “That just means you can ogle him more.” 

You groan again, letting your forehead fall into your palm. “I’m pathetic.” 

“I think you’re right.” Emily chuckles as she stands up. “You are doomed.” 

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fluff #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fluff #x reader #sadie writes

[wqnwoos]

it’s well past two in the morning when all your guests have left, and it’s just you and jeonghan and some cardboard boxes.

the two of you are taping the last of his boxes shut, a movie you’ve seen a million times playing on the television, both of you talking and laughing over it. the party has just died down — yours and jeonghan’s farewell party.

he’d said it sounded too dramatic, when you first brought it up. because neither of you were going far. you to your new studio apartment and jeonghan moving in with seungkwan, now that the lease was up and the owner wasn’t planning to renew it. jeonghan had dubbed it the “house-cooling” party instead, the opposite of housewarming — the kind of stupid joke he only makes to you.

still, though, as you sit among the boxes and leftover pizza, you feel kind of — wistful. when you say as much, jeonghan laughs, reaching over to tap under your chin fondly.

“wistful?” he repeats, smiling.

you huff at him. “i’m going to miss you, that’s what i’m saying, you ass.”

“i’m not going far,” he reminds you. “we’re literally within twenty minutes of each other. fifteen on a good day.”

“still!”

“i’ll visit you all the time. i’ll get tired of seungkwan doing karaoke. and then we’ll basically be roommates again, because he doesn’t stop doing karaoke.”

jeonghan’s tone is light and easy, but you can’t help wondering why the two of you aren’t going to be roommates again. why you hadn’t looked for an apartment together. neither of you had brought it up, things just fell this way, and all of a sudden you’re thinking about how jeonghan always moves your washing to the dryer for you and how much you’re going to miss him.

because you really are — not just because of laundry. you guys were roommates before you became actually close, brought together by mutual friends; you’ve never known a jeonghan that wasn’t jeonghan, my roommate, and suddenly it feels a little like losing him. because suddenly you love him, and not in a jeonghan, my roommate way. not in a jeonghan, my friend way either — in a way that puts aches in your chest, has your ribs living up to their name, acting a cage for your heart. you’re not sure how long it’s been, but it’s been long enough.

you’d been clinging to the hope that it would pass; everyone knows you don’t date your roommate. but now — now he’s not your roommate, and it hasn’t passed, and you don’t know whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing anymore.

on one hand: you could tell him. bare it all out, in the open, raw and bloody and unfettered. on the other hand: there are so many things you would rather do than experience rejection. you’d be able to take just being his roommate if you needed to. could’ve held out until it passed.

“maybe we should’ve moved in together again,” you voice, forcing your voice light and airy and casual, playing it like a random off-hand suggestion.

jeonghan’s vehement shake of the head is surprising, and it stings. more than you expected. “no.”

you can quite literally feel your face fall, staring at him without pretence. “what?”

he looks up from the box he’s packing, an uncharacteristic seriousness in his brown eyes. “ask me why,” he instructs softly.

you swallow thickly. it’s hard not to, when he’s looking at you like that — warm and familiar and intense and scary, all at once. your eyes follow the strand of dark hair that falls over his forehead, suddenly realising just how close he is. “why?”

jeonghan sets down the tape, tilting his head to the side, choosing his words slowly, carefully. “because if i ever ask you to move in with me again, it’ll be very different to this. can you pass me the scissors?”

you barely even hear the last part. “different? different how?”

“just… different.” he shrugs, reaching over you for the scissors himself. “you’ll be dating me, for one thing.”

time seems to come to a halt when he says those words, and you barely manage a whisper — “what?”

jeonghan rolls his eyes and pokes your forehead. “i’m trying to say i’m in love with you, dipshit. can you please take a hint?”

you malfunction. it’s late and your brain is already fried enough from finals and he’s staring at you, and this isn’t a dream, this is real.

and so you launch your roll of tape in his direction.

“what the fuck is wrong with you?”

jeonghan doesn’t even need to dodge the tape, but still gapes at you. “what?”

“you can’t— just drop a love confession like a — like a hot potato, and then expect me to catch it!”

“a hot potato?” he repeats, and then he’s biting down on a laugh, shoulders shaking. “did you just call my love confession a fucking hot potato?”

“no! yes, well — ” you flounder, confused in your embarrassment. “oh my god. you’re so mean. i wasn’t ready.”

jeonghan’s still laughing. “if i’d warned you in advance, what would you have answered?”

and now it’s your turn to stare him down: “you didn’t ask anything yet. what am i supposed to answer?”

that only tilts jeonghan’s smile further upward, and he scoots closer, leaning on one arm. you can smell him, soft and fresh and so incredibly near, as he speaks — “you’re smart. i think you can work it out.”

you kiss him first. quick and sweet, over and over. you think it’s probably answer enough.

also in my head this is the same couple from this drabble but they can be read separately

an / hana comeback era ⁉️ this is just something i wrote super quick but HIII it’s been almost 2 months since i posted some writing 😭 i’m so sorry this awful piece is the first thing u guys get, hopefully will write something better soon!

perm taglist: @n4mj00nvq @eoieopda @som1ig @wondering-out-loud @graybaeismytae @hannyoontify @sahazzy @dokyeomin @icyminghao @smilehui @nicholasluvbot @lvlystars @immabecreepin @hanniehaee @kokoiinuts @astrozuya @doublasting @yepimthatonequirkyteenager @qaramu @weird-bookworm @phenomenalgirl9 @lightnjng @strnsvt @onlyyjeonghan @athanasiasakura @dokyeomkyeom

#jeonghan fluff #jeonghan x reader #seventeen x reader #seventeen fic #seventeen fluff #seventeen imagines #seventeen fanfic #jeonghan imagines #jeonghan comfort #jeonghan fic #jeonghan fanfic #jeonghan x y/n #jeonghan scenarios

[lizard-on-a-window-pane]

sunlight ☀️

hii it’s me againn. could you also do tasm peter who is nerdy and nerdy reader? and it’s kind of like a meet cute at the library? that’s literally my dream 😔 (you can tell i’m in my spiderman kick again)

-🎀

love a good spiderman kick ☺️ hope you like it!

pairing: TASM!Peter Parker x reader word count: 1.4k tags: just fluff

The exam was next week, and Peter still hadn’t gotten a chance to so much as glance at the most helpful textbook. The only copy the library carried had been way over due for ages, and the damn things were way too expensive to buy. He hoped it would be back by today because the late fees would be so much worse after today’s cut off. So, into the library he strode to look for it for what felt like the millionth time. 

He was sure the librarian remembered him, and which book he was after, after so many attempts, so he went straight up to the desk. Peter raised his eyebrows in question, in hope. He wrung his hands together as the librarian gave him a look he couldn’t quite decipher. “So?” he finally couldn’t help.

“You just missed it,” the librarian deadpanned. How could she be so damn calm? She must know his life depended on getting his hands on this book! Well, maybe not his life, but definitely his grade… important enough.

“What?! And you didn’t hold it for me or something?” “Hold it for you? What do you think this is, kid? We don’t take reservations.”

After a moment, though, she sighed in slight defeat, something akin to pity entering her hardened features. She gave a sideways nod toward the person standing at the other end of the desk. 

“Maybe she’ll share,” she whispered. 

Peter followed her look. His eyes landed on a girl. She looked mortified. Given the books lying next to her open backpack on the desk, she’d clearly been packing them up. At the top of the pile lay the coveted textbook. And she’d clearly overheard his whole exchange with the librarian. 

You lock your gaze onto the books in front of you. You could feel your cheeks warming, and the last thing you wanted was to accidentally make eye contact with this stranger. This ridiculously attractive stranger you’d noticed in class before… Peter Parker… who had clearly had the same idea about the book being returned today…

You feel terrible at having snatched it up just before him. You hadn’t known someone else was after it, too, but you could’ve guessed, and it felt like pure luck that you got it first. You have no idea how to react, and before you can come up with any idea at all, you sense him stepping toward you and freeze in panic.

“Um, hey,” Peter whisper-says. God, why didn’t he just speak at a normal volume? He was in the library, sure, but just the entrance. He’s sure he sounded weird, and that’s the last thing he wanted after his little outburst clearly made you uncomfortable. It wasn’t your fault you’d gotten the book before him. 

Your eyes dart up to meet his at his words, and when they do, his nerves increase tenfold. Your eyes are so damn pretty. All of you is. And you look half way to an anxiety attack at his approach. “Hey, sorry,” he tries. “Sorry, I know we don’t know each other, but I just… Um, well… Sorry about that,” he ends lamely, gesturing back to where his exchange with the librarian just occurred. “It’s okay,” you whisper, smiling awkwardly and tucking your hair behind your ears. You look back down at your hands, pulling at the too-long sleeves of your shirt. 

Peter’s hand comes up to his head, messing with his hair in a typical nervous tick. He can’t stop staring at you, and you can’t stop avoiding his stare. He had to say something else before the mounting awkwardness blew up. Why couldn’t he think of anything? God, why was his heart racing faster than it ever did when he had to fight giant, scary monsters? Somehow you were scarier. 

“Um,” he starts again. “You in, uh, you in Vidal’s biology class?” he ventures, guessing you need the book to study for the same exam as he. It blows his mind he hasn’t noticed you before if you are.

“Mmhmm,” you nod softly.

“Me too,” he says and cringes. “I don’t recognize you.” “Oh, I don’t know. I tend to sit in the back.” You finally look up at him as you say this. Your eyes meet, and it’s too much to handle. After what feels like an eternal instant, you both look away chuckling. 

Peter’s just nodding like an idiot, chewing his bottom lip, reeling for something else to say but failing miserably. At this point, the thought of getting the book has totally vanished from his mind. The fear of failing next week has been completely replaced with the fear of failing right now.  The idea of your walking away and his not getting to talk to you again makes his stomach sink.

You’re just staring at your hands, unsure what you’re supposed to do in this kind of situation. How do people just know what they’re supposed to do when other people are involved? 

You still feel really bad that you got the book first, and you figure he’s only still talking to you to ask when you’ll be done with it. The exam is so soon, you hadn’t really been planning to return it till after. But keeping it to yourself when he needed it too made your stomach twist. You didn’t even know him, but you wanted to help him. So, you mustered the courage to do something you know, from experience, you otherwise wouldn’t do.

You say softly, “If you want… um, I don’t know… maybe, we could share it?”

“What?” he responds, too quickly, confused, his voice nervously airy.

You’re not sure if he didn’t hear what you said — possible with how softly you’re speaking — or didn’t understand what you meant, so you don’t know what to say. Words are too hard, so you just grab the book — your hands grateful for something to do — and hold it up to him like an offering. 

“Oh!” he hiccups. Then, “Oh,” he says more quietly, chuckling lightly. “I mean, I don’t want to bother you. You got it first fair and square.” “Yeah,” you shrug. “But you need it, too, right?” 

“Yeah…” His mind begins stirring up images of the two of you studying together… maybe laughing together eventually… sitting closer together to both get a good look at the book… 

It’s making his heart beat faster, and he realizes he’d be an idiot to not seize the opportunity. It’s the perfect excuse to spend more time with you, and he doesn’t even have to ask you out. Yet. 

So, he quickly says, “Yeah, um, sharing would be great. If you don’t mind. I can just meet up with you whenever you were going to study anyway… Wherever is good for you; I don’t mind; you choose; whatever you prefer is good with me —” Having started, he can’t stop talking now, his nerves morphing into words, eager to leave his body. 

You giggle at his garrulousness, and he knows he’s in trouble when the sound of it makes his breath hitch. 

“Well,” you say. “I was planning to get started now… you know, since I’d been waiting to get my hands on the book. If you wanted to, um, maybe go to the café maybe?” 

You hadn’t in fact been planning to start right away. If you were honest with yourself, you’d been planning to put it off till you couldn’t not… like you always did no matter how hard you tried to get an early start. Note to self: the only cure you’ve found to procrastination so far: ridiculously pretty boys with warm eyes and a voice you could listen to forever. 

“Yeah, that’d be great. That’d be great,” he nods, smiling. It’s the first time you’ve seen him fully smile. You’d be happy to just hand him the book as long as you could watch him study, the exam be damned. 

“Great,” you repeat, grabbing your things and turning toward the café. Your eyes widen in panicked disbelief at what just happened. You glance slightly back just to make sure you hadn’t imagined it, and sure enough: Peter Parker is taking a quick step to follow you. He falls in step with you as you walk, and it’s terrifying and invigorating just how much you like the feeling of him close beside you.

#peter parker #tasm!peter parker #tasm!peter x reader #tasm!peter x you #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #tasm!peter fluff #tasm!peter imagine #tasm! peter oneshot #tasm!peter fanfic #spiderman fanfiction #ria1k

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

please write some conrad fics, the tag has been DRY

Is there a Aaron Dessner that has produced that is not heartbreaking? The Great war, Tolerate it, Right where you left me, You’re losing me, Would’ve could’ve should’ve. I have nothing against Jack, but when Aaron is involved, things…hit different.  

The acronym switching from love of my life to loss of my life *UGLY CRYING*

Warnings: heartbreak

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

When coming to Cousins for Belly and Jeremiah’s wedding, you knew it would be impossible to go through a whole weekend of wedding festivities without speaking to Conrad. You tried to avoid him, but he was always right there. In the kitchen talking with Laurel. In the living room with Jeremiah and Belly. In the backyard with Steven helping set up the chairs and tables under Taylor’s instructions. 

At least he didn’t come to the wedding with a girl. It would have hurt too much.

‘’I can’t believe our Belly is getting married,’’ you said as you all sat in the living room for the smallest bachelorette party. 

There was no male stripper dancing or crazy alcohol consumption like you see in movies. Just matching pajamas, a plastic ‘bride’ crown Anika got online, and sparkling mocktails. Laurel felt out of place among the younger girls, but it was her daughter’s bachelorette. She couldn’t not be there.

Taylor took a cupcake from the table, all decorated to perfection by you. ‘’I would have never guessed she would be the first of us to marry. We all thought it would be you and Con—’’ She stopped herself when she saw Belly looking at you, realizing that if she finished her sentence it would hurt you. 

A silence fell and a lump settled in your throat. You brought your drink to your lips, wishing there was alcohol in it. Drowning your sorrows in alcohol is not the solution, but it’s good at temporarily numbing the pain.

I thought that too.

Your parents bought their holiday house in Cousins where you were ten and you had known the Fishers and the Conklins since. Susannah had invited you over to play with her kids — to make friends. Although you were closer to Jeremiah and Belly in age, it was Conrad who got along with you the best. He taught you how to play Uno, came to get you when you swam too far at the beach and helped you clean your dress when stained it eating a blue popsicle. He was always nice to you. Patient and caring. As you got older, he was only looking at you. Everyone noticed, but no one said anything. He’s just always been yours. 

Until he wasn’t. 

You didn’t want to sour the ambiance or steal the attention from the bride-to-be, so you got up and excused yourself to the bathroom. You closed the door, feeling the quiet sanctuary of solitude envelop you. Memories of you and Conrad flooded your mind, each more painful than its predecessor. Nothing would ever compare to the pain this breakup felt. 

Leaning against the sink, you stared at your reflection in the mirror, tears welling up and blurring your vision. You tried to make them go away by fanning your eyes, but they overflowed, carrying with them the weight of five years of heartache.

How could it still hurt after all this time?

With trembling hands, you reached for a tissue, dabbing at your eyes, but the tears kept coming. ‘’Please, stop.’’ 

In the morning, you woke up on a blow-up mattress in Belly’s room. Your eyes were sensitive from crying and red. You tried to cover it with eye-drops and makeup, but when you came down for breakfast and Belly pulled you in a tight hug, you knew you didn’t do a great job. 

Jeremiah eyed the two of you, raising an eyebrow and silently asking what was up, but Belly shook her head. 

The rest of the day went without any downpour of tears. A part of the afternoon was spent tanning under the sun and drinking lemonades, relishing in the last moments of tranquility before the evening's rehearsal dinner. The place was going to get filled with family members and other guests soon and it’ll get very crowded. 

Steven joined you in Belly’s bedroom as you were getting ready for dinner, still wet from being at the beach with the boys. He tried to get a kiss from Taylor, but she pushed him off as he was dripping water all over her makeup bag. Jeremiah laughed in the doorway, blowing a kiss to Belly before parting to his own bedroom to change. 

Although you weren’t the only single person in the room, you never felt more alone.  

At the dinner, you sat listening to the speeches about Belly and Jeremiah’s love. Without surprise, Steve made sure to embarrass the couple and Laurel was unable to hold back her tears when her turn came. Childhood stories and teenage anecdotes about their early moments of relationship made the guests laugh and smile. 

Everything seemed to be going smoothly until Adam inadvertently attributed a story to Belly and Jeremiah, when in fact it was about you and Conrad. The frown on Jeremiah’s forehead as his father continued to speak matched Belly, both of them not knowing what he was talking about. 

‘’Eh, Dad, Belly didn’t come to my prom…’’ Jeremiah whispered to his father. ‘’I went to hers and she was wearing a purple dress, not green.’’ 

Adam paused, his realization dawning slowly. ‘’Oh. You’re right. That was Conrad. I caught him and his girl making out outside the house when they came back. Susannah was out of her mind for allowing her to sleep over…’’  

The revelation hung in the air, accompanied by an uncomfortable silence. Your grip on the glass of wine tightened involuntarily, the pressure causing it to shatter in your hand. Shards of glass cut into your skin as crimson droplets mixed with the spilled wine. 

Beside you, Taylor gasped in concern, her eyes widening at the sight. ‘’Oh my god, are you—’’ 

Ignoring the sting of pain and Taylor’s voice, you excused yourself and hurried inside to tend to your injury. You grabbed some paper towels and pressed them over your cuts. 

Unbeknownst to you, Conrad followed after you. As you stood there, watching the white soak and turn red, you felt his presence behind you. ‘’Don’t do that.’’ His touch was gentle as he took your hand and removed the soiled paper towels, placing them on the counter. ‘’Never apply pressure to an injury that’s not clean of debris. You’ll push them further in,’’ he advised, the doctor in him speaking. ‘’Let me see.’’ 

‘’I’m fine. Don’t worry about me,’’ you insisted, attempting to brush off his concern. ‘’Go back to everyone else, it’s almost time for the best man’s speech.’’ 

But Conrad didn’t budge. ‘’Sit here. I need to check if there’s glass in it.’’ he urged, his tone firm yet caring. 

Knowing there was no way out of this, you sat on one of the kitchen stools and let Conrad check your injury. He turned on the kitchen tap and you hissed as the water hit your freshly cut skin, the cool liquid soothing the sharp ache. 

You sat there as Conrad tended to your wound in silence, his fingers gentle as he inspected your hand for any embedded glass fragments. You couldn't help but notice the warmth of his touch and the upgraded woodsy cologne, their familiarity causing your heart to flutter despite the pain. 

His focus was entirely on your hand, his brow furrowed in concentration. It reminded you of that one time you fell from your bike and he patched up your knee and elbow. Once he made sure there was no glass in it, he went to fetch an antiseptic and gauze from the bathroom.  

As he was wrapping it up, you thanked him. A simple ‘thanks’. 

‘’Be careful drinking wine, next time.’’ Conrad meant it as a light teasing, but you weren’t in a mood to laugh.

‘’Don’t say anything. Please,’’ you pleaded, your voice barely above a whisper. ‘’It hurts seeing you — it really hurts. So much that I didn’t want to come to the wedding, but I couldn’t miss Belly’s big day. I couldn’t do that to her. What type of friend would I be?’’ The weight of your words hung heavy in the air between you, the truth of them echoing in the silence of the room. ‘’But being here, watching her and Jeremiah getting married is killing me because that should have been us,’’ you continued, your voice trembling with emotion. ‘’This house is where we met; every corner holds tons of memories of us and it’s haunting me, torturing me since I got here.’’

‘’I never wanted to hurt you. I’m sorry—’’ 

‘’You’re sorry? No sorry will be enough,’’ you said. ‘’You told me I'm the love of your life about a million times. You said you would never leave. But you did. I loved you so much— You were it for me, Conrad. It was always you. But now you’re the loss of my life.’’ 

He said your name, but once again, you didn’t let him speak. 

You got down from the stool, the stinging pain in your hand still present. ‘’I should get back outside. Hopefully Laurel knows a way to get blood out of my dress.’’

—

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#conrad fisher imagine #conrad fisher #conrad fisher fanfic #conrad fisher x reader #the summer i turned pretty imagine #the summer i turned pretty

[alpydk]

Poor Lad (Rugan)

Just a quick (apparently fever dream idea I had at some point that I'm writing up. Hopefully will appease the Zhentarim inside me.)

***

It’s a warm day in Baldur’s Gate as Rugan stands in the small cemetery. The sounds of the circus nearby can be heard, the laughter of children, the cacophony of various instruments being played. He’s stood there for some time looking at the relatively new tombstone that juts out of the freshly dug earth. His leather armour has been replaced with a black cotton shirt and his once cleanly shaven face now sports the start of an emerging beard, a failing attempt at a disguise as he wanders the streets of the city.  

“Gods, I’ve been standing here ages trying to come up with the words. Ain’t I meant to have some big farewell lined up? You know, flowers or something? I’ll have a pint for you later if anything. Hopefully, that’ll do.” His words are casual, not the type for baring feelings or dragging out long goodbyes.

“Roah’s leading the guild now. Yeah, you remember that big hero that got us out of that cave? Turns out they weren’t all glowing halos and bullshit like we thought they were, ended up taking down Nine-Fingers and stuck her in charge. Bit of a surprise if you ask me, you know after they showed up and took care of Zarys and… well, you know what happened.” He looks away catching the glimpse of a small bird that flutters nearby. “I offered to meet up with them if they ever got to the city but I've not seen head nor hide of them since we got here. They’re probably off saving the world or something. A real shame as they owe us half the profit from selling that chest we had, though I’m not so sure it’s worth the gold now.” He swallows hard, trying to bury the guilt. Yeah, that pint’ll do nicely, maybe a bottle of whiskey to chase it down too…

He passes a quick gaze back over the stone, knowing the words he should be saying, the ones he’s been trying to avoid for too long. “You know Olly, I was a right prick that day. Should’ve just done the job, got in got out like always, kept my head down. But mate, it gets exhausting following the rules all the time. I wanted an out, a bit of peace, maybe a nice bird to rock home to. Instead, I fucked it up and got you killed.” 

He kicks a stone up with his boot, watching as it bounces along the grass past the grave. “You were an alright lad, proper head on your shoulders, could’ve gone far with the right person behind you. Shame you didn’t have that though.” He takes one last look at the stone, staring at the dates and doing a quick calculation of the age stated. “Fuck," he sighs. "I’m sorry, alright. I should’ve done better by you.”

He rolls his neck, loosening up the tension that’s set in before relaxing his shoulders and turning away. “I’ll see you at the tavern later, mate. Have a good one.”

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 rugan #monday angst? #zhentarim #rugan is hard to write #i need a real author here #or the artist in my head

[hemeruni]

Well. Here’s what I’ve been planning on doing… I’d like to introduce you all to-

The FIRST ANNUAL tumblr User hemeruni direct, a special event where I get to actually go into more detail about the projects I’m currently more so focused on, while giving important news to what’s next on our menus.

Now let’s go ahead and get this show rolling shall we?

NURSE PHILLY UPDATES

As you know, Nurse Philly has been placed on the back burner for a while as I took the time to work on my other projects. But, starting today, I’m working full speed ahead to officially get the Askblog up and rolling! The scripting process has been tough, but a rough outline has been finished and a overall timeline of arcs and events are all laid out, so it shouldn’t be long for you all to see the nurse in person!

I’m not the type to give out dates, but expect this hush puppy to start around mid-late 2024.

Alright we’re getting the hang of things! What’s next?

GLIMMERLOVE NEWS

This project started as a one off post that quickly spiraled into one of my favorite projects thus far under the hemeruni brand. While there isn’t plans to get a Askblog rolling anytime soon, the askbox will always be open for asking questions to these mysterious folk.

This project doesn’t have much besides that, but if things change revolving my work ethic, I’ll surely consider it.

No date on this one, as it’s currently in a fine state from where I’m seeing it.

HAPPY HATCHDAY HEMMY!!!

By the time I’m writing this, Hemera’s birthday is still ongoing and it might honestly been the most exciting days I’ve had in a long time, considering the fact that I’ve just… haven’t been active as much.

This fox means so much to me and I have Sparklecare and only Sparklecare to thank for creating such a wonderful creature that deserves everything wonderful on this blue marble of a planet.

I love you Hemmy, don’t stop being you.

Me and Uni are making a coffee shop au

Yeah idk what else to say

It’s news to me but I’m just posting this since I thought the idea was funny.

Personal au?? I think?? Only WE get to make one not YOU /J

Now. I mentioned something at the beginning of the whole thing about a change that is going to happen. Before we end this, I might as well say what I want to say.

The Future.

I’m breaking away from this community, for my own mental sake. I’m saying this with a heavy heart, knowing that this whole 'fame' thing isn’t something I enjoy. Besides fame, I’ve been so caught up in comments and reblogs that it mentally drains me to see one post that I spent less time on doing better then one I actually put my effort into.

This culminated in a unfollow from the official Sparklecare account that I’m still assuming is over the criticblog situation. Nevertheless, it left me bed ridden for weeks, realizing that what I worked so hard for was taken from my own dumb mistake.

That taught me a valuable lesson though, which is why I’m finally deciding to just cut contact with the community entirely, besides friend groups and servers I’m in you won’t really see me active on my main, mostly just au updates.

That also means I’m no longer reblogging stuff to my main account, but I’ve already came up with a solution revolving a account called hemerunireblogs (which will be linked later down the line)

That’s the most you’ll see me interacting with this community, I hope you can understand.

Now.

We’ve reached an absolute.

The End.

I wish things could’ve been different, but it’s either I continue down this path and further ruin myself for others sakes, or I finally start to work on myself again. In the end, I decided to choose myself. Call me selfish, I could care less.

For some, I’d like to wish the best, even though we may have not talked much, I’d love to see you again sometime soon.

You all have been a wonderful audience, I hope you all had a wonderful Hemmy Hatchday. Good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight my friends.

-Mx. Hemmy

#my art #sparklecare #hemera philly #hemeruni #uni cornelius #nurse philly #Glimmerlove au #text post #ramblings #long post

[amazingmsme]

Restless ‘Til We Reach Home

Anywhere I’d Follow You (ch. 1)

AN: happy underworld saga release day! Literally the day we’ve all been waiting for! This fic is my pride & joy rn so I hope y’all like it! Be sure to buckle in cause you’re in for one hell of a ride! The underworld saga is literally everything I could’ve imagined & more, & it makes this chapter hit so much harder. & I wouldn’t have it any other way 💗

Edit: omg I can’t believe I forgot to add the ghost!polites playlist that I so lovingly created! My sincere apologies to anyone who read it without the intended listening experience

Polites woke alone in the darkness. Or at least, he thought he was alone, until he felt a body shift next to him. The sky above was an inky black, completely devoid of stars. It didn't feel right.

He jolted upright, the ground underneath him rocking with his movement. No, it wasn't the ground, it was wood. He was on a small boat, and the bodies around him were his fellow soldiers. Most still remained unconscious.

"Odysseus!" he called out, but received no answer. "Eurylochus!" His voice echoed down the approaching canyon, bouncing back until it met his ears.

"Shhhh," a husky voice sounded from above. Polites startled and looked up, seeing a cloaked man standing at the back of the boat. His face was concealed by the hood pulled over its head, the only discernible feature being two bony hands peeking out from his sleeves. They clutched onto an oar, thrusting the boat further on its journey.

Polites crawled to the edge of the boat and leaned out, and he was greeted by perhaps the most beautiful sight. They were floating on a glowing river, the water a brilliant blue green. It was as he was staring into the ethereal water that he realized why the sky had no stars: they'd all fallen in the river.

The awestruck smile fell flat when he took a good look at his surroundings.

Everywhere he looked was gray and rocky and completely devoid of life. He heard people moaning in the distance and could see them trudging along in mindless huddles. Small fights broke out amongst them, and Polites could see fires burn in the distance.

He had to be dreaming, he was sure of it! He pinched his arm as hard as he could until he yelped from the pain. When he didn't wake up, he reached his hands into the water, splashing his face repeatedly.

"Wake up! Wake up! Wake up, wake up!" he yelled each time the cool water hit his skin. His vision blurred as the water dripped down his face and his eyes filled with tears. His shoulders shook as he sobbed, leaning over the edge of the boat. He could feel when they hit the shore, but he didn't budge, even as everyone else filed out.

The ripples around the boat began to calm, and soon enough the surface of the water was as smooth as glass. His eyes met his reflection and he jerked back, rocking the boat slightly. Hesitantly, he leaned back over the glowing water to get a closer look. Ripples sent minor shockwaves through his reflection, slowing until it showed a clear picture.

A choked gasp escaped his throat as he clamped a hand over his mouth. He looked up at the ferryman, who nodded solemnly. The tears he'd been holding back finally rolled down past his cheeks.

His head hung low as he cried, and he could feel each tear drip from his nose or chin. When he opened his eyes again, he saw tiny dots of red on his toga. Hesitantly, he reached up to wipe the tears from his face. When he pulled away, his hands were stained red.

He thrusted his hands in the water, scrubbing furiously to rid them of the blood. The stream before him turned a pale pink before the current carried it away.

Polites knew exactly where he was.

At first he tried to lay low, but he had always been outgoing and friendly, even to those who weren't so friendly back. But it quickly became clear that down here, no one wanted to talk to him. Or so it would seem.

Polites got into the habit of exploring the underworld every day. There was nothing to do but wander aimlessly or work, and Polites much preferred the former. It was while on one of these walks that he spotted a young woman kneeling by the riverbank. At first he thought nothing of it, but the closer he got, he could hear her quiet sobs and sniffles.

He approached cautiously, waving when he felt he was close enough to warrant a greeting. "Well hello there!" he said in a chipper voice, offering a shy grin. She looked up at the stranger before her, yelping and falling back onto her hands. He was quick to put her at ease.

"Hey hey, it's okay! I'm nice, I was just crushed by a cyclops," he explained his appearance, aiming for humor. The girl's lips twitched in a fleeting smile.

"Oh! Um, I'm sorry..." she apologized, and he waved a hand dismissively.

"Why? You have something to do with it?" he joked, smiling when she giggled, shaking her head.

"Noho..."

"Then you have nothing to apologize for!" He turned to her, holding his hand out to her. "I'm Polites." She studied him, chewing her lip before she accepted it.

"Eurydice."

"Ah, what a lovely name for a lovely woman," he complimented. Her smile was tainted with sadness. "I'm sorry, are you alright?" he asked gently. She shook her head, plastering on a fake smile.

"I'm in Hades, why wouldn't I be fine?" she tried to joke like he'd done moments before, but it fell flat.

"You know, if you need to get something off your chest, I'm all ears. I was practically the sole shoulder to cry on for 600 men." His tone made it impossible for Eurydice to discern whether or not he was being serious. Finally, she decided, "Yeah right."

"No really! Well, obviously not all of them took me up on my offer, but I'm a great listener," he offered with a warm, genuine smile. She let out an amused huff.

"I know it sounds stupid, but... I really thought I was gonna bust outta here." Polites placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"I don't think it's stupid at all. I mean, we all want out-"

"No, you don't get it!" she spun around to face him, tears in her eyes. Polites held his hands up in surrender on reflex, his entire body tense. Eurydice heaved a sigh, burying her face in her hands. "I was so close..."

Polites was almost afraid to ask, but, "C-close to what?"

Eurydice looked up with wide, tearful eyes as she stared longingly out into the distance. She spoke breathily as her mind began to wander, "Freedom."

Polites couldn't believe what he was hearing. He grabbed her by the shoulders. "Wait, you mean you were trying to leave? How?" he asked desperately, the wounds on his face and body starting to bleed.

"I wasn't on my own. Orpheus came for me."

"Orpheus?" he questioned.

"I died on our wedding day..." she answered, trailing off as she stared at the ground. "And he risked everything to come save me. We could've made it out and we'd both be happy. Start a family..." she took a grounding breath, drying her eyes. "I never did get to hear how his song turned out."

Polites perked up slightly. "Oh, he's a musician?" he asked. She smiled as she remembered her love.

"Mhm. Said he was gonna write a song to fix what's wrong with the world," she said, amusement clear in her tone. "Guess he hasn't finished it yet."

"Well, sounds like he's got his work cut out for him. I can't imagine it'll be easy for him, without you," he said softly. A sob caught in Eurydice's throat as she looked away, closing her eyes softly.

"Don't. Please."

"Sorry," he immediately apologized, feeling rather guilty.

"It's fine. It's not like it's your fault or anything."

Polites looked at her, mouth slightly agape as he tried to decipher whether she was teasing him as he'd done earlier, or if it was sheer coincidence. The subtle twitch of her lips was all he needed to know. He barked out a laugh, bumping their shoulders together.

"Well would you look at that! Looks like someone's getting their sense of humor back!" he praised, making her roll her eyes.

"Never left," she lied. Her gaze locked on the Palace of Hades, and Polites followed her line of sight.

"He had something to do with it, didn't he?"

Eurydice took a shaky breath and nodded. "Yeah."

"They usually do. Even when you don't think so... They do."

~~~

Life in Hades is not what Polites expected.

For one, he didn't know where the crumbling rubble ended and the new scaffolding began. Every day it seemed, the underworld would change ever so slightly. Buildings and complex machinery were all being built before his very eyes. It was nothing like Polites had ever seen.

Slowly, copper and iron replaced stonework as buildings all but erected themselves, and horseless chariots carted material to various work sites. The grand palace in the center of the underworld has all but doubled in size in the short time he's been here. And jutting out from the southern east corner, stood an imposing factory spitting black smoke. It felt... wrong. Almost as if Hades had tried to tuck it away out of sight, only for his greed to force it to grow until the rocks could conceal it no longer.

He said he was doing this for them; that he was creating a greater home for their eternity. So then, why was he turning the air thick with smog? Why must the tortured souls carry the burden of his progress?

Nothing was right anymore. Then again, nothing had been right for a long time.

~~~

Polites never thought he'd grow used to the underworld, but with Eurydice, he found a flow. They steered clear of the mindless work convoys, with their bowl shaped helmets and tools in hand. They marched along packed gravel roads in uniform lines, singing in a low, menacing chant.

They didn't stray far from the riverbanks, and when they did, chose to walk through rolling fields of nothing but dead grass and dirt. They found solace in the few crumbling ruins that have yet to undergo renovations.

Shriveled vines choked out the grand archway the pair sat under, but not even the resilience of nature could last under a God's iron grip. Polites closed his eyes, trying to picture the lush foliage that swallowed the rubble of a once ancient building. When he opened his eyes, he was met with the disappointing reality of thick, dry vines sprawling over crumbling stone as if caught in a wooden spiderweb.

"You ever made a flower crown?"

The question came out of nowhere, catching him off guard. If asked, he would deny the way he had jumped at the sound of her voice.

"Um, n-no, I can't say I have."

When Polites didn't elaborate, Eurydice continued. "My sisters and I used to pick flowers in the meadow behind our house and we'd spend hours weaving crowns and necklaces while we talked." She smiled at the fond, distant memory. Polites smiled back.

"That sounds really lovely," he assured. He saw the longing in her eyes, could feel the ache in her heart. If only he could ease that pain...

"It was. I think you'd really like it. Heh, too bad I can't teach you."

"Yeah, that's too bad," he lamented in agreement before an idea struck him. "Or, you know... we could still try," he suggested, holding up a handful of dry vines and twigs. Eurydice's face lit up with a smile as bright as the sun.

"Really? You mean that?"

"Well, I mean, I'm sure yours turned out much better than whatever we can make down here, but-" his rambling was cut off when Eurydice slammed into him, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck in a grateful hug.

~~~

Polites had lost track of how long he'd been there, though he was grateful for Eurydice's company. It was the single source of comfort since he'd awoken in the underworld, the one reminder that there was once a time when things were good.

They would walk along the riverbanks, sharing stories from their lives. Eurydice once said that Orpheus would've liked Polites, and he swelled with pride. The feeling would've been mutual, he assured.

He can't help but to picture his friends meeting this lively young spirit, ripped from the Earth too soon. He thinks they'd like her too.

There were no days and nights here; everything ran together in one big screaming haze. At times, Polites thought they were the only souls down here who weren't screaming...

He missed being alive. He missed his friends, missed the way the sun warmed his skin, the way the sea would taste on the air, the way the wind would whip through his hair. He missed food, and feeling hungry, or tired. He missed the way he could feel his heart race in his chest when Odysseus would put himself in harms way, only to come out unscathed.

He always came out unscathed, no matter the challenge.

He was walking alone, trying to clear his head when he heard his name being called. "Polites! Polites!"

He turned to see Eurydice running towards him, feet pounding against the rocky shore. He met her halfway, picking up on her sense of urgency.

"Eurydice! Is everything alri-"

"There's a ship," she rushed out breathlessly. His eyes went wide and he scanned the horizon.

"Of course, the ferryman brings people-"

"No, I mean a real, living ship!" she emphasized with a playful punch to his shoulder. He smirked down at her, bumping their hips together.

"You know ships aren't really alive," he teased, tilting his head back to laugh at his own joke. She rolled her eyes, snatching the bandana from around his head. His hands flew up a second too late as he turned to face her. "Hey!"

She giggled, waving the bandana out of reach. "I'm being serious!" she insisted through a smile. He snorted, snatching the cloth from her grasp playfully.

"Yeah, that's why you stole my bandana," he taunted, shooting her a grin.

"You weren't listening! Just look!" she pointed in the distance. Polites looked up to humor her and gasped when he saw a large ship creeping up the river. It was much closer to them now. He took a step away from the bank.

Eurydice smirked, looking at him from the corner of her eye. "You believe me now?" He nodded wordlessly, mouth gaping open in shock.

They stood like that, just frozen in awe watching it get closer. The figures aboard the ship were now visible, and Polites shaded his eyes, squinting up at the deck. Did he really see what he thought he saw? Was that really...

"Steady as she goes men!" A figure paced around the deck, barking orders and securing the ship. Polites would know that voice anywhere.

"Odysseus?" he asked, barely aware he said the name aloud. Eurydice gasped and snapped her head to look at him.

"Odysseus? Like, like your Odysseus?" she asked frantically. Polites looked back at the ship for some other kind of proof, spotting Eurylochus at the wheel.

"Yes, I'm sure. Look, there's Eurylochus," he said, pointing at his friend.

She turned to him with an expression on her face that he hadn't seen since the day they first met.

"You have to go."

His head snapped down to look at her, "What?"

"They came here looking for you! I mean, why else would they come all the way here?" she asked, clutching to the fabric of his toga. "You're important to them, Polites. You're the missing piece, they need you," she pleaded.

The ship was right in front of them now, Odysseus clutching the rail of the ship with a horrified look. When his eyes landed on Polites, he froze, all the color quickly draining from his face. He turned away abruptly.

"I-I don't know Eurydice. That doesn't really seem like- I'm sure there's gotta be another reason!" He wasn't sure why or how they were here, but he had a hard time believing it would be for him. It would hurt too much, getting his hopes up like that.

"A reason to go through the underworld?" she asked incredulously. Her expression softened, and she placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. "They've missed you."

A sob caught in his throat. "Yeah, I miss them too."

"Then what are you waiting for?"

He turned to her, tears in his eyes. "B-but what about you? You can't come, and I can't leave you!" he said, gripping onto her hands for dear life. "Y-you'd be alone again, I can't do that!"

"Shh, hey, hey, look at me," she said in a soothing voice, but Polites could see the tears shining in her eyes. "Don't think of it like that, okay? You're doing this for me." She squeezed his hands so hard, her knuckles were turning white. Funny, how even their spirits react like they still have blood.

He closed his eyes and shook his head, but a soft hand cupping his face brought him back to reality. "Hades only made sure I couldn't get out, just to spite our love. He won't notice if you escape, I promise," she reassured. He placed a hand atop hers, still shaking his head.

"You can't promise that-"

"Maybe, but I can try. Please Polites," she was practically begging at this point. "One of us has to see the sun again."

A sob shuttered through his body and he surged forward, grabbing her in a tight hug- their last hug. Maybe the last hug he'd ever be able to actually feel.

"I don't want to leave you," he muttered into her hair. He could feel her tears begin to fall down his arm like raindrops.

"Me either, but you have to. It's your only chance." She held on for a few more seconds before allowing herself to slip away.

"Goodbye Eurydice. Thank you for... everything."

"Farewell Polites. I know you'll keep them safe."

He nodded to her before turning towards the ship, marching along the shore. He got about halfway before her sweet voice called out to him.

"Polites, wait!" He stopped in his tracks, turning just in time to catch her in his arms. Her hands carded through thick black hair as she squeezed him tight. She kissed his cheek, pulling away to whisper in his ear, "If you ever come across Orpheus, please tell him I'm okay."

"Of course. You have my word," he promised.

When Eurydice pulled away, a small amount of blood was smeared on her lips and cheek. Polites decided not to dwell on what that meant.

~~~

Polites jogged along the riverbank until he caught back up with the ship. He waded into the water, trying to figure out how to get back on the ship. He saw a rope nearby and grabbed ahold, climbing up. The rope swayed with the ship as if it were weightless, making it more difficult to ascend.

The rope slapped against the side of the ship, sending Polites hurling through the hull of the ship and into the lower deck. His body tumbled and hit a few crates, causing them to come crashing down.

"Oh no no no!" he muttered, trying to restack them, only for his hands to phase right through.

On the deck above, Odysseus heard the commotion and ordered one of his men to investigate as he continued to warn the others to stay on guard.

He trudged below deck, not expecting what awaited him.

Polites yelped when he heard a clatter behind him, turning to see one of the soldiers standing in the doorway, his sword laying on the ground before him. He opened his mouth to speak, but the man turned on his heels and scrambled up the stairs.

"Captain!"

Odysseus immediately ran to the soldier's aid, hand on the hilt of his sword. "What was it?"

"I-it was Polites, Sir..."

The captain bristled at the name, turning his back on the man.

"Impossible."

"But I'm telling you, he was right there!"

Odysseus sighed, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Listen to me, brother. This place is not to be trusted, okay? Nothing that you see or hear is to be trusted. Those were Circe's words. Got that?"

The man nodded, though he was clearly still shaken up. Odysseus sighed once more.

"Come on. Why don't you show me where he was," he said, deciding it might be a good idea to help put both their minds at ease.

Odysseus crept down the stairs carefully, eyes scanning the shadows for any intruders.

"Hello? Anyone down here?" He was met with silence. He didn't know how tense he was until his fears were put at ease. It was empty.

"The boxes must've fallen on their own, it's been a little bumpy. Let's go," he ordered, picking up the discarded sword and holding it out for the man to take.

Meanwhile, Polites was crouched behind a barrel on the upper deck, watching what few soldiers remained. They all looked so different, but none more than Odysseus. He watched as his friend marched up the stairs to resume his task of guiding the ship.

But... his directions didn't sound right. The way Odysseus was leading them would pass by two guardians, and more would surely die. Odysseus didn't know his way around here like he did, to no fault of his own. But Polites couldn't let that happen.

He made sure no one was looking when he crept from his hiding spot.

He stood behind Eurylochus, hesitant to speak. But the fork in the river was approaching.

"Actually, you're gonna wanna take a right," he said from behind. Eurylochus jumped at the unexpected voice, turning to face him. His face morphed in terror as he saw the man before him.

"CAPTA-mmm!"

"Shhh!" Polites shushed, slapping a hand over his friend's mouth. Eurylochus tried to shove him away, only for his hands to phase through his attacker's arm. His eyes were wide with fear as he fumbled for his sword, still trying to steer the ship through the narrow waterway. "It's me! You have to trust me!"

"I don't think so."

Polites turned to see the tip of a sword pointed at him, the eyes of Odysseus staring him down with a vengeance.

"Captain, I-"

"SHUT UP!" he yelled, taking a step closer. Polites let go of Eurylochus, shying away behind him. "Now who are you really?" he all but growled.

Polites furrowed his brow in confusion. "Do... do you not recognize me?" he asked weakly. Odysseus let out a low, sadistic chuckle, and it was hard to believe this was his beloved friend.

"Ohoho I know who you want us to think it is! But we've been through enough, I know a trap when I see one. So I'm only asking one more time." He pressed the blade to where his throat would be. "Who. Are. You."

"Odysseus, it really is me! W-why don't you believe me?" he asked helplessly, realizing his sword wasn't the only one trained towards him.

"Why should I?"

"B-because I'm trying to help you!" he insisted. There was a long stretch of silence before Odysseus answered.

"I don't believe you."

Odysseus reared back, preparing to strike. Polites panicked, he didn't know where else to go, where to hide. On instinct he clutched onto Eurylochus for protection.

He opened his eyes, and Eurylochus was gone. No, that wasn't right... he could still hear him. He sounded... scared.

"Captain... help me," his hand raised on its own towards Odysseus. No, that wasn't his hand...

The soldiers had cowered back when Polites disappeared; they were all clearly on edge.

"Eurylochus?" Odysseus asked carefully.

"He's here."

Polites had to speak up, he had to make them listen.

"Please, I'm just trying to help." He spoke with a double voice. "I know a better way. Please... you have to trust me. I'm- I'm not a god, or whatever you think I am," he pleaded. "I'm me."

Odysseus glared at him, lips curled in a sneer. A tense silence fell over them as the seconds ticked by.

"Fine." He stepped back and lowered his sword. "As you were." When no one moved, he repeated himself in a harsher tone. "As you were!" They immediately broke up and returned to their posts, keeping an eye on their new passenger.

"Are... you gonna stand there the whole time?" he asked carefully.

"Yup," Odysseus answered, popping the p. "Are you gonna hide the whole time?" he countered.

Polites took a breath to ground himself. By the Gods, it felt good to breathe again... But this wasn't his body. These weren't his lungs…

"That depends. Are you gonna pull your sword on me again?" he asked.

"Only if you try anything." That was as good an answer as any, he supposed. Polites sighed, stepping out of his friend's body.

Eurylochus gasped as he regained full control of his limbs. He lurched forward, using the steering wheel for support. He glared at the spectral intruder.

"What did you do to me?" he demanded. Polites held his hands up in surrender. "I-I don't know! I was scared, I panicked!"

Eurylochus glared down at him, getting in his personal space to get his point across. "Don't do it again." A gentle hand on his shoulder snapped him out of it.

"Eurylochus, why not get some rest? Feel free to use my quarters," Odysseus offered. Eurylochus nodded in thanks, but not once did he take his eyes off Polites.

Odysseus was steering now, his mind elsewhere as he thought of what the prophet Tiresias had foretold.

"There is a world where I help you get home, but that's not a world I know..."

"You're gonna want to hang left, there's some larger rocks.

"I see a man who gets to make it home alive, but it's no longer you."

"Captain?"

Odysseus didn't like who he was becoming, but each challenged left him more broken than the last, and the mosaic he was creating of himself was more of an abomination.

"Captain watch out!"

Odysseus shook himself out of it, cutting the wheel to avoid the boulders. Polites watched him carefully, waiting for his friend to thank him and smile like he used to.

That moment never came.

Polites crossed his arms and huffed, "You're welcome."

Odysseus clenched his jaw. The imposter's tone was light and teasing, and so much like the friend he knew. But the underworld was nothing but lies and deceit, danger lurking around every corner. He was sure the man before him was nothing more than a farce.

"Just stop pretending," he sighed in defeat.

"Come again?" Polites asked, cocking his head. Odysseus tensed at the disgusting cracking sound the movement made.

"Nothing. Just- no more talking until we're safe."

We. Polites smiled as he stood next to his friend, just like old times. It never occurred to him that he wasn't meant to be included in that statement.

"Okay Captain."

Polites remained by his side, offering directions whenever they're needed. He doesn't dare speak beyond that, knowing how testy his friend can be when he's trying to focus. Not to mention he seemed like he was in a bad mood to begin with.

He had no idea.

"Alright, it shouldn't be much farther. Just go straight through there," Polites guided, pointing towards a cave on the horizon. The smallest amount of sunlight shimmered through.

"Everyone! Full speed ahead!" Odysseus yelled across the ship, men scurrying about the deck.

Odysseus kept his eyes trained on their destination as he spoke. "Thank you... You can go now."

"Oh! Right, you're- you're busy. We can talk later," Polites said, backing away. "I should probably go apologize to Eurylochus." He turned to make his leave, but Odysseus stood guarding his path.

"Stay away from him," he threatened, face shrouded by long, matted hair and hidden behind a thick beard. His once warm gaze turned black as he trained his weapon at Polites for a second time.

If he were still alive, his heart would be pounding right out of his chest.

"Odysseus? You're scaring me," Polites said, looking him up and down.

"AND YOU'RE SCARING EVERYONE!" he screamed, surging forward. Polites is taller than him, even when he's not floating, but Odysseus's presence towers over him.

"Wha-what?" he breathed out, backing himself against the rail. Odysseus kept him trapped there for a few more seconds before turning away. Polites spared a glance and saw every pair of eyes resting solely on him, hushed whispers floating about as hands hovered over their own weapons. He looked back at his captain with wide, fearful eyes.

"I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean to..."

Odysseus ignored him, not so much as a glance his way. And that hurt.

"Odysseus?"

"Don't call me that," he snarled, finally looking over his shoulder. Polites couldn't help but snicker.

"Don't call you by your name? Okay, Captain," he teased, hoping to catch a glimpse of that brilliant smile.

"Knock it off! You're not as funny as you think you are," Odysseus snapped, making him pout.

"Ouch. You know, my new friend Eurydice thought I was hilarious. She-"

"I don't care."

Polites felt his phantom heart sink at those words. Odysseus had never spoken to him like that before...

"Oh. O-okay. I'll just, um, I'll go."

"Good riddance."

Polites tried to stifle the hurt gasp he let out, biting his quivering lip. He just wanted to disappear. He didn't want to be here, but he didn't know where to go. After a moment, Odysseus chanced a glance over his shoulder and heaved a sigh of relief.

"Finally. Thought he'd never leave." Polites felt tears well in his eyes despite his confusion. He was still here, what did he mean? He reached a hand up to rub his tired face, only to freeze. He couldn't see himself. To test his theory, he raced down to the middle of the deck and stood there, but no one paid him any mind. He got his wish. They got their wish.

He disappeared.

Polites felt himself sink through the floorboards, but didn't care enough to stop it before he plopped down below deck. He landed flat on his back, not bothering to get up. What would even be the point?

Finally, he sat up before drifting into a standing position.

~~~

Eurylochus couldn't sleep. How the hell did Odysseus expect him to rest after all that? His mind was reeling, and in all honesty, he was completely and utterly confused.

Trust nothing in the underworld.

Circe's instructions. More importantly, Captain's instructions. Up until now, he thought that was to be believed. Everything down here was a wicked and cruel trick. And yet, this vision of Polites had seemed so real. More than that, it felt real. He had no idea what it did to him, but in the moments he was possessed, he knew what it was thinking: what it was feeling. And it was scared, hurt and confused: like a wild animal backed into a corner. But nowhere could he feel any kind of ill will towards any of them. And that scared Eurylochus just as much as it perplexed him.

He gave up on sleep and decided to go back to the upper deck. He navigated the narrow halls and froze in his tracks when he came upon the transparent image of his fallen friend.

"Eurylochus!" Polites startled, standing up a little straighter when he noticed him.

Said man recoiled as he was addressed, and watched him with a careful eye, his hand hovering over his weapon.

"Please don't," he said, cowering back towards the shadows. "I just want to apologize for earlier. I-I didn't mean to do... that."

He was met with nothing but silence.

"Eurylochus? Say something," he pleaded. He noticed the way Eurylochus stared at the ground instead of him.

"You're not really him, are you?" he asked skeptically. Pilotes felt his shoulders sag in defeat.

"You too?"

Eurylochus dared to meet his gaze. The expression he wore was that of skepticism and a hope long lost.

"I'm not convinced yet." As he walked past, he paused at Polites's side. "So convince me."

His words caused a smile to break out across his face as he turned to his friend. Eurylochus looked shocked before his expression melted into something softer.

"That's a start, I guess." He abruptly continued on his way, not wanting to linger with their friend's spirit. Polites was left alone in the dark, his thoughts serving as his only company.

He didn't emerge from the lower deck until he was sure they were well out of the underworld.

#epic the underworld saga #epic the musical #epic musical #underworld saga #ghost!polites #polites #eurydice #odysseus #eurylochus #the odyssey #odyssey fic #epic fic #hadestown #hadestown fic

[kimkimwritesstuff]

OKAY SO I DECIDED TO DO IT PROPERLY

WRITE SOMETHING WITH ODETTE LIKE MAKING OUT WITH HER (AND MAYBE LIKE WE SHOULDNT BE DOING IT CAUSE LIKE NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT THE RELATIONSHIP IF IT IS EVEN ONE) (the build up to it too if you feel like it!!) AND THEN CLARA CATCHING US AND TEASING BOTH OF US BUT MOSTLY ODETTE CAUSE DUH!!

~your biggest fan😙; LOVE YOU SUNSHINE!!🩷

Interrupt much??

Summary - *ask* Reader and Odette have an established relationship

Warnings - Small make out session. Probably OOC for Odette😭

Author’s Note - I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG- I HAD WRITERS BLOCK AND LIKE NO MOTIVATION😭 SO SORRY POOKIE😭😭 IM SO MAD CUZ ITS SO SHORT AND IT TOOK MORE THAN A WEEK😭(One of my favorite songs, just a bop to listen too, not really related to the fic💀)

You and Odette have been dating for a while now. Not that anyone knew about it, but you had. You hadn’t told anyone about it since Odette wasn’t very comfortable with sharing the news yet, and you were okay with that, you went at her own pace. The only problem was that in order for you guys to meet without being caught would be that you would constantly have to climb in through her window in order to get your cuddles worth. Today was no different than usual.

You did your usual routine of climbing up a tree(which always hurt to be honest) opening the window, and climbing in. Odette had been waiting for you for a while. "What have I said about being punctual? Mother arrives in almost 2 hours." Odette scolded you sternly. "Sorry, the tree was giving me trouble again. The important thing is that I’m here.” You added, barely making it through the window.

Odette was sitting on her bed with her arms crossed. You collapsed onto her lap. “We need to find some other way to meet up, that tree makes my back hurt. More than you would at least,” you teased, this caused Odette to turn red. She smacked your arm. “Shut up. You’re such a tease.” Odette said with a red face.

 You rolled your eyes playfully and cupped her cheek with your hand, she turned an even brighter shade of red. "You're warm" you muttered. "Well, last time I checked, I'm not a reptile so I don't think I'm meant to be cold?" She said with a soft giggle as she played with your hair. "Haha, very funny- I was TRYING to say I could you make you warmer" you teased grabbing a hold of her chin and making her face upwards so her neck was exposed. She got flustered and swatted your hand away, "Sh-shut up!"

You sat up and adjusted yourself on her lap, wrapping your legs around her waist. You chuckled softly, giving her a soft peck on the cheek. "You're so soft and comfortable, I could stay with you all day." You smiled softly, resting your head on her shoulder. She wrapped her arms around your back and rested her head on yours. You could tell she was getting comfortable around you and your affection a lot more. You began to nuzzle into her neck and could’ve sworn she purred a little. She turned red again and looked away. You saw how she had reacted and let out a soft chuckle, ‘she’s so cute’ you thought as you continued to nuzzle into her. 

You had the urge to just take a small bite, a little nibble if you will. You pinched her neck with your teeth and Odette let out a sharp wince followed by a soft moan of pain. “H-halt! That hurt!” She whined. “Sorry, I just couldn’t help myself” You chuckled back. “Hmph” she crossed her arms and looked away, her face still red. 

“Fine, fine. I’m sorry. Will kisses help?” You asked cupping her face. She was giving you the silent treatment. You grabbed a hold of her shoulders and shook her, causing her to giggle. “So?” You asked. “Maybe…but it’s not guaranteed!” she added with a cheeky smile. “Good enough for me.” You smiled. You leaned in for a soft kiss. Odette’s lips met with yours in warm kiss, she hesitated at first but she still wrapped her arms around your waist. You made sure to stay at her own pace, which was actually not as slow as you expected. You placed your hands on her neck as you kept kissing her tenderly. You could tell Odette was still getting flustered and you pulled away slowly. “You okay, darling?” You asked, wanting to make sure she was comfortable. “Mhm!” Odette smiled. “Just not used to it as much yet- But I’ll get the hang of it, I promise” Odette leaned in again, the kiss was much quicker this time. Odette was still blushing, but you could tell she was a lot more comfortable now.

You could feel yourself gaining more and more butterflies, your chest was becoming a little tighter. You moved your hands slightly more up into her scalp. The feeling of her hair intertwined with your fingers wasn’t new, but it sure as hell felt more familiar. You were breathing a little heavier too. As the kiss continued to deepen, the door suddenly opened. It was Clara, Odette’s sister, who was standing there staring at her phone. “Hey sis do you know where……..” she looked up and trailed off. 

Odette immediately pushed you off of her, causing you to fall on the floor. “Ever heard of knocking?” You chuckled. “Did I interrupt you guys about to fuck or something?” She said with a grin. “W-WE WERE NOT! W-WE WERE JUST KISSING! GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF THE GUTTERS!” Odette said as her face turned red. “Wait, we weren’t?” You added while getting up, obviously you were teasing, which made Odette get more annoyed. 

“Dang sis, I didn’t take you for the type to have hook ups.” Clara said with a teasing grin. “I’m not! Y/n is my girlfriend, you imbecile!” Odette exclaimed in annoyance. You sat down next to your girlfriend and grabbed a hold of her hand. Suddenly, Clara turned to you and gave you a ‘seriously?’ type of look. “Really…? Her?” Clara pointed at her sister, Odette rolled her eyes. “I know, right? It’s hard to believe for me too.” You grinned. You felt Odette let go of your hand and give you an elbow to the side, which actually hurt REALLY bad.

Odette stood up and you followed. “Look, darling, as much as I crave your attention, I also crave your silence. So, how about you…I don’t know..?…shut up?” Odette added facing you. “As if you can shut me up.” You scoffed. Clara had a grin plastered on her face, she found this amusing. “Careful, she might pull a ‘no cuddles for a week’ on you” Clara chuckled. “Make that two weeks” Odette grumbled. “You aren’t helping, Clara!” You shouted at her. “Lucky for you, that wasn’t my intention” Clara shrugged with a grin.

You hugged Odette by the waist. “Don’t do this to meeeee….” you pleaded resting your head on her shoulder and glaring at Clara. “Hey, you got yourself into this” Clara argued and crossed her arms. “But I wasn’t deprived of cuddles until you said something!” You shot back. “Boys, boys, you’re both handsome. And I respectfully take away such punishments since I’m pretty sure I’d give in after an hour or so.” Odette interrupted and had a faint, annoyed, smile on her face. You and Clara both rolled your eyes. 

“So-? How long has this been going on?” Clara said sitting on Odette’s bed, you let go of Odette’s waist and stand next to her, grabbing her hand. “5 months,” you responded, kissing the hand you just grabbed. Odette pouted but her cheeks let off a small hue of pink, “5 months and 3 days,” she mumbled. “5 months and 3 days if you want specifics.” You added with a small smile. “What the fuck?? You’ve kept this a secret for that long??” Clara looked absolutely flabbergasted, especially when she turned to her sister . “Well- I wouldn’t exactly consider that first month as ‘dating’ but it was close enough?” You added. “Let me guess, you would occasionally hold hands while Odette called you darling?” Clara said looking at her sister, which made Odette turn red a little. “I considered it to be dating-“ Odette mumbled. “-What matters is that we’re officially together now.” You interrupted.

“Just as long as you don’t break her heart or do anything she doesn’t want to do, I approve of this relationship.” Clara shrugged, she stepped closer to you, seeming menacing. “In all seriousness though, if you break her heart, I’ll break your bones” she glared. “Y-yes ma’am-…” You shot back as fast as a gun shot. Dang- Clara may be younger but you could’ve sworn she seemed like an overprotective older sister for a second there- 

“Alright, well, I’ll let you two be. Y’all can go somewhere, I’ll cover for you” Clara spoke as she continued to glare at you. She eventually turned and walked out of the room. Odette scoffed and turned back to you. “You feel like going out somewhere?” She asked. “Sure, darling” You replied with a smile. You grabbed Odette by the hand and dragged her outside. You had won over sister-in-law, but what about mother-in-law, hm? Luckily, that’s a problem for another time. Right now, it was just you and your girlfriend taking a peaceful stroll in hell, hand in hand, for what you wanted to be forever…

THIS FEELS SO SHORT UGHHHHHH

#odette carmine x reader #odette x reader #odette carmine #kimmywritesfics #first request

[magical-xirl-4]

Thinking about Rukkhadevata’s design again in Genshin and how fucking bleak it is. It makes me upset because after Nahida was leaked, I thought the ORIGINAL Dendro Archon was going to look completely different and take actual inspiration from SWANA, because to me she was the TRUE Dendro Archon. I was looking forward to her so much, only to be dismayed when I realised Nahida is the actual Archon, and especially broken up about how Rukkhadevata looked. She is just… nothing. She’s beautiful, sure. But she’s just. Nothing.

She didn’t even have to be that pale!! Nahida/Kusanali (can’t remember which name) is said to be very pale in mythology which, okay fine, make her pale, BUT WHAT ABOUT THE ORIGINAL AND HER PREDECESSOR? SHE DIDN’T NEED TO LOOK LIKE A GROWN VERSION OF HER OMG.

#genshin impact #Nahida #rukkhadevata #I actually still feel betrayed over this #we could’ve had it all. it could’ve been so good #I clearly put WAAY too much faith in Hoyo #I’m not even from SWANA but I was looking forward to Sumeru SO MUCH #but they gave us tired orientalist tropes and complete lack of care for visual elements #it’s just so disappointing. I really wanted to love the Dendro Archon but I can’t completely bc of what we got #like it could’ve been so good to see soemthing so visually diverse especially in a genshin character #fuck I was really looking forward to rukkhadevata and actually tricked myself that she would be different #I’m sure it’s because I love how genshin showed fantasy through different cultures. Mondstat was very run of the mill European fantasy #and getting to see Liyue was so enthralling for the first time bc I had never played a fantasy game with heavy Chinese inspiration #with both the setting. music. and characters/designs of them. same with Inazuma but to a lesser extent #bc I was more familiar with Japanese iconography (even then they didn't get the time periods right with Inazuma and Mond was mishmashed too #so SUMERU? I was so looking forward to how diverse the characters would look BC IVE NEVER SEEN THAT IN HIGH FANTASY BEFORE #only for that be totally crushed #now I have a big interest in SWANA. I never have it much thought before but genshin gave that to me #and also Gnosticism (also thanks to FFVII lol) #sumeru and SWANA representation deserve(d) so much better and way more respect in video games and other media #I’d love to see a story one day that faithfully adapts myth and legend and mixes it with accurate design

[houseswife]

doomed tragic yaoi is all fun and games until you start pondering the Life They Could’ve Had

#I’m emo over it alright #they would’ve been the worst ever parents but also the absolute best #wilson would’ve been such a great PTA dad he’d get invited to all the events #and the entire committee would’ve had a restraining order against house after he attempts to sabotage the 4 millionth competition #in favour of their kid #AUUUUURGGGHHHH #I know that they emphasised how Wilson wasn’t ready or stable enough to be a father #but he never really let go of that vision #and house was so good with rachel :( #they could’ve fostered traumatised kids and broken the cycle #I’m just being delusional atp #but they deserved the bbc johnlock domestic fathers ending #we deserve a soft epilogue #and whatnot. #house md #greg house #gregory house #hilson #james wilson #house/wilson #hatecrimes md

[existentiol]

something that pisses me off in RA is that Flanagan will occasionally hype up Pauline as this super important and prominent figure in Will’s life, even treat her as a proxy for the mother he never knew, and yet will just refuse to show it beyond the like. two or three (personal) conversations that they have in canon. I get that he was attempting to make her an important person in Will’s life but why not do that by actually making her an important person in Will’s life

#hey Flanagan I hate to tell u but just because she’s married to Will’s father figure does not automatically make her his mom figure #what REALLY annoys me is how easy it would have been for him to connect her & will #like hey. if only there were a pretty clear gap in Will’s education that halt couldn’t fulfill - say for example mmmm diplomacy? #(​cause we all know how gifted halt is at conflict resolution) #then he’d have a valid reason to seek out a master of diplomacy for lessons in negotiating compromises & treaties #but no I guess not. Will’s just naturally good at diplomacy despite never really being exposed to it #yk what extra sucks? #if Pauline HAD taught will about treaties & stuff then him receiving the last name treaty wouldve been 1000x more meaningful #it would’ve spoken to her influence on him and solidified her as a sort of parental figure in her own right #AND as an extra extra bonus: if she came to the cabin to teach will about negotiation tactics and such #then we could’ve gotten more halt/Pauline interactions. as in: we could’ve actually seen them being in love ON SCREEN instead of just being #told that they loved each other #will could’ve had a chance to see how much the two of them mean to each other. and then he would’ve had some actual basis for a speech #at their wedding or whatever #but yeah no why do that when we can just imply that will & Pauline got super close off screen? same effect right????? #ranger’s apprentice #pauline dulacy #halt o’carrick #will treaty #I love these books so so much don’t get me wrong. but there are just some things…… #anyway. #jackie rambles

[evansbby]

me looking at all the met outfits: 😐

#THE THEME SHOULDVE BEEN THIERRY MUGLER AND I WILL DIE ON THAT HILL #the looks would’ve been so much more iconic #Mugler was a genius #literally like a genius in terms of silhouette and construction #we could’ve had such creative interpretations and takes on his iconic work #such stunning sillhouettes #like????? #someone did wear a vintage Mugler look like I just don’t remember who bht someone wore it to this met gala #the Venus look #the one cardi b wore years ago #idk man all the looks are pretty but boring #then again it’s Karl lagerfeld chanel so that’s what was expected #but like up until now we got nothing out of the box type thing #I liked Gisele’s look #and Kim’s look #I loved anok’s look #I think I liked gaga’s look too but I have to take a closer look #dua lipa’s could’ve been so good but I wish she did her hair in an updo #and wore the headpiece that Claudia wore in the original runway #idk just something to make itoomph #anyways sorry lmao #fashion student in me jumped out

[avatardoggo]

i held a man’s hand today

#this has been in my drafts since the 10th so please forgive me on the late update i’ve been Busy ™️ #it all started on the weekend FG dropped me off at my choir performance for school and i’d been running around all day so i was all 😵‍💫 tryi #to do everything in a timely manner and he was such a big help driving me around everywhere and stuff so sweet 🥰 and as i was outside the #theatre he was handing me something? i can’t even remember rn and he was like you’re going to do great all that good pep talk stuff and as i #was reaching for what he had in his hand i kinda just kept my hand there and he did too but i had to go so i just left and then he picked me #up after and that was that and then on sunday we we hanging out and i just went out and said it bc ya girl is no coward 😤 i said “i wanted #to do something yesterday’ and he said “’ok?’ and i was like i wanted to hold your hand and he asked why didn’t you? ‘bc i was nervy 😣’ and #then after some back and forth small joking he just took my hand and we held them in silence for a bit and i was explaining how im in my #head a lot and i’m really trying to not do that anymore esp with him and he was rubbing 👏🏾 my 👏🏾 hand 👏🏾 with 👏🏾 his 👏🏾 THUMB 👏🏾 #LIKE ANSJDKKFKFKFKLLDJCNCNJDJENNXXJJD #you see normally that makes me reeeallllyyt ticklish but it was so soothing i could’ve fell asleep right then and there i promise you and he #was so gentle with his voice and omgoodness this man #so then i had to go and he was like yk you’re going to have to let go bc there’s no way im letting go 😭😳🙄 LIKE SIR #but ya that’s the latest update 🫣 #mutuals my beloved <3 #vk overshares in the tags #friendly giant ™️ #fg

[shatterthefragments]

Fuck. The biggest highs always have the hardest comedowns. This isn’t fucking worth it. Except it is. It has to be.

#the fucking socks on the table that broke the camels back #but honestly I don’t really have time to have another dish that broke the camel’s back crisis #vent #I’m standing outside trying to determine if I’m going to cry or not.a #and shit I already gave dad the money I want to exchange for a $50 #so I’ll have to talk to him again #and it’s cold outside. #and I am. not dressed for it. but at least I have a hoodie or I wouldn’t be able to stand it at all #and then I’ll try to forget and move on #it’s my one fucking day off #and let’s be honest. I planned to masturbate the entire fucking day. and I didn’t. and I still did some stuff. and I get it the table is a m #a mess #but there are worse things in the world than a sock on the table #unless we’re all autistic and our rules just all conflict in the worst fucking ways bc that is a possibility (except I think he’s NT) #bc I melt down and shut down over stuff being where it shouldn’t too (prefaced by I don’t think I’m autistic. I just have sensory issues and #scored an average of 161 in the raadsr #but like. it makes sense for our family to have it. #I’m just. fucking upset now #and my sister (who tbh had Meltdowns before masking it really well) helps me when I shut down. but fuck #none of this is good none of this could’ve been as bad as it is if somebody went and got a diagnosis and we could’ve had support #except this fucking ableist society we live in sucks and just #and anxious and wanted to kill myself so badly what good would a diagnosis be if I wasn’t around #…I should go back inside and eat dinner #but still #a few socks on the table where we don’t even eat off of that part #yells my name ‘what now?’ the socks on the table. I just. walked out of the house. and honestly good for me. #bury me back to what we came from where I belong where we came from we belong we belong #if the back tire of the bike was inflated I’d probably be going for an ill advised ride rn tbh #but alas

[deus-ex-mona]

it’s ✨okay✨, right~?

#s o rry rant incoming im just. re a l l y crabby after working for 8.5 consecutive hours with no proper break okie~? </3 #ayEEEEEEEEEEEEEE THE ADMINS AT MY WORKPLACE CAN GO K I C K R O C K S #their time management is somehow worse than mine and i suck balls at it?????? SJCFJFFHDHHD I THOUGHT Y’ALL WERE BETTER AT YOUR JOBS MANSSSSS #the!!!!! admins!!!!!! sent in over a hundred samples without any info sheets and stuff so the morning shift literally couldn’t get started!! #doing the morning shift’s part of the job was. annoying. to say the least. especially when said work could’ve actually been done (ʘ‿ʘ) #dammit workplace admins you had one job </3 #and n o it’s not to send in the sample info sheet things at the same time as the pm shift’s reporting time </3 #and as if that weren’t enough.. the!!!! admin!!!! refused to go home in the evening?????? and sent in like 80 samples at like 8.30pm?????? #and that’s not counting the samples that were yeeted in at 5pm </3 truly sadge #and o f c o u r s e we haaaaaaaad to be short-staffed today lmfao. the two workstations life compels me to lay down on the floor and c r y . #but bc i’m just ✨too great✨ at my job you see (lies) i finished my stuff way too early and had to do other extra tests too s o b s #and that included a test that i don’t fully know how to do (sadge) #well. at least that test involved the use of a microscope. thank you past me for attaining magic skills with microscope zooming and stuff #seriously. thank you past me. i can almost forgive you for choosing to enter the f r e a k i n g ✨s c i e n c e✨ industry of all things #but hmmmmmmm im amazed that i actually managed to finish everything across those two stations. am i too good at my job or ✨w h a t✨ (lies) #but man. m a n. none of this even gets into my secret beef with the data entry admin. #she can’t spell for her life. it s e r i o u s l y grinds my gears whenever i see her spell the word ‘content’ as ‘contant’. #but no. her spelling got on a w h o l e new level of questionable when she spelled the word ‘crackle’ as… ‘cracker’. like??? how???????? #and she told me to ask the senior analysts if it was possible to retrieve the results for a test that we’d write the results for ✨by hand✨ #from some kind of system????? like i was just so!!!!! baffled!!!! that she couldn’t understand that there was no system to check???? #though. hm. i guess saying that i have ✨secret✨ beef with that admin would be an understatement. i think none of the others like her either #but! i do have secret beef with the janitor bc he alwayyys magically appears behind me whenever i’m doing something important/holding acids #well! at least we don’t cross paths when i’m working the pm shift. the janitor dude was spared from my presence for the week lmao #hfhfhfhhfhfhfhffffffff well. m. i’m sorry if you read all that. i’ll be more normal tomorrow i swear!!!! (blatant lies) #i feel like tling something ✨t o x i c✨ to match how im feeling thoughhh… hm. maybe the p a r a s ite chapter from the d*27m annequin anth…? #been thinking about that song lately ngl.. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. #oh wellssssss at least i can try to enjoy what’s left of my long weekend lmaooo goodnighttttt #inedible blubbering

[ohmyfairies]

I’ll never understand how CC wrote Tessa, Jem and Will as the most perfect potential polyam love triangle and then wrote Cristina, Mark and Kieran as an absolute mess that clearly should’ve ended as just Mark/Cristina

#also this is just my opinion don’t yell at me :)) #but we all agree herongreystairs we’re perfect #their love triangle was handled so well and could’ve easily beeen resolved as a polyam relationship #but mark hated Kieran and Cristina and Kieran had like no chemistry at all #mark and kieran could’ve been a good lovers to enemies to lovers #and mark and Cristina were super cute #but Cristina and kieran did not have any any chemistry #I would’ve loved mark/Cristina/Emma as well #but that’s probs just because I hate julian so much #herongraystairs #will herondale #tessa gray #jem carstairs #cristina rosales #mark blackthorn #I don’t remember if kieran had a last name #or what their ship name is #Shadowhunters #the dark artifices #the infernal devices #cassandra clare #edit: no but seriously just block me if you’re offended bc I’m just gonna block you if you leave a rude comment