#we’re still working on harness training her

[lyjen]

Maybe

Summary: Evan and (Y/n) end up closer than ever on a call. But when (Y/n) gets hurt and Evan’s girlfriend notices the slightest sign of worry for his colleague, she confronts him.

Request by: anonymous - The request

9-1-1 masterlist

Taglist: ( @oliviah-25 @shauna-carsley

______

“Come on, we’re halfway there.” Buck tries to motivate (Y/n), to attempt to give her some more energy. A sigh falls off (Y/n)’s lips as her flat hand slides over the side of the stairwell wall and starts carefully placing her feet down onto the metal railing underneath her.

They are inside a building that was going to snap in two.

Buck and (Y/n) had the opportunity to go up the partly collapsed building, doing a sweep to see if there were any signs of life inside the building. The chances of that weren’t that high, the building they were in was an old hospital and wasn’t being used in decades.

But protocol said to always do a sweep through the buildings to make sure they wouldn’t leave anyone behind. So, that’s what they were doing. But till so far, they didn’t see anyone.

“Can you believe it? They made us go all the way up there, and find nothing.” she said as she stepped down onto the stairs and grabbed the railing with her gloved hands.

“Well, if you define old broken hospital cabinets and beds as nothing.” Evan laughed at her as he panted and flashed his light, which was secured to his harness, towards the rest of the stairwell.

But his laugh was nowhere to be found anymore when he looked at the barricaded entryway of the stairwell. “You’ve got to be kidding me” he sighed as he stepped closer.

They were in the second half of the building. They were almost back on the ground floor. Although they needed to go down another six to seven levels, it still felt like they were almost there.

(Y/n) could still hear the building trying to move with every step they took inside. The concrete was creaking and cracking on every corner.

Evan turned his head to look at his colleague “There’s no other way than..” he pointed his index finger up and looked in between the staircases until he could see the part where the building was snapped. “Back up. I get it.” She finished his sentence annoyed.

She was tired, exhausted, this was hour twenty one of the twenty four hour shift she was on and she still didn’t have any decent sleep.

“Let’s go probie” Evan said with a smirk on his face as he pulled himself up by the help of the railing. He knew damn’ well (Y/n) wasn’t a probie anymore, but he loved teasing her with that nickname. He knew she didn’t like it, she could handle other people saying it, but whenever Evan said it, it sent a shiver down her spine.

*

“Okay, there’s nothing to worry about.. you’re going to be fine.” (Y/n) motivated herself as she walked down the stairs and focussed herself on repeating the sentences she just read in the books. “You’re going to be just fine” she whispered as she tried to reassure herself as she skipped the last two steps of the stairs and landed safe and sound on the ground with her two feet.

She had a few study books piled up in her hands, with a couple of loose sheets sticking out of the books because those were her notes she just wrote down.

(Y/n) was in her probation period, trying to train, study and work all at once. It was hard, but she knew she could do it. She just had to step up and work a little harder. While she was walking towards the locker room to put her books away, she was looking through the pile of books.

“Hey probie!” Evan’s voice sounded through the firehouse, harder than he originally wanted to sound.

(Y/n) was caught off guard as she heard her new nickname fall off the lips of Evan. The books she was holding flew out of her hands and within a second they were all spread over the ground floor of the firehouse.

“Fuck” she hissed underneath her breath as she quickly squatted down and started collecting the books she just spread over the floor.

“Oh shit, sorry” Evan said as he quickly walked towards her and crouched down to collect some lost papers.

“You-..You don't have to do that..” she stumbled as she saw Evan collecting her notes. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you” Evan apologizes as he picks up the papers he collected and handed them over to (y/n).

“No, it’s okay. I wasn’t really paying attention.” she said as she accepted the papers he was holding out to her, and she placed them right on top of the pile of books she made. She secured the pile of books between her lower arm and her chest as she and Evan both straightened up again.

Their eyes connected, it felt like Evan was drowning in those beautiful eyes. “Hey, uh..” Evan sighed as an awkward silence fell between the two of them and he was still looking in her eyes like he was possessed. “We’re going out with the team after shift for a drink, do you want to join us?” he continued as he pointed over his shoulder and slid his hands in his pockets.

“That’s sweet.. but I’m kinda busy” she smiled softly at him as she shrugged her shoulders and motioned with her head towards the books in her arms. “Oh yeah” Evan said as he realized what he asked her was not his best move.

(Y/n) turned around as the conversation fell silent again. She could feel the tension in the air, it made her uncomfortable, so she decided to walk away.

“Uh, maybe next time?” Evan spoke loudly as he was now watching her back again, trying to get her attention. She didn’t dare to give him another glance. “Maybe!” she shouted back as she continued her way towards the locker room again with a smile on her face.

*

“Hey! Open these doors with your halligan” Evan commanded as they finally reached an elevator shaft with the door closed tightly. A groan fell off her lips as she tried to balance her weight and keep herself in place while the building was obliquely.

Her hand reached for the halligan, which was secured on her back, and she pushed the metal tool in between the two elevator doors and pushed as hard as she could. Evan’s gloved hands were placed on one of the doors to assist her.

Evan panted as he had put all of his strength into his action and looked around to search for a possible anchor point to hold their weight. “This is not going to hold the both of us..” Evan said as he saw the nearest point to attach them to while he held onto the elevator door.

It was a half broken piece of railing of the hospital hallways. It was old, probably rotten, but it could only hold one of them. It wasn’t surely the strongest one, but it could hold one person to the max.

(Y/n)’s hand harshly tapped against his chest. “So, we find another anchor point.” she said as she finally got Evan’s attention and pointed her hand out to the opposite direction of the elevator doors.

There was another set of doors on the opposite side, it was a double-sided elevator.

“I was about to say that you had to ripple down first, but this could work too.” Evan laughed as he looked to his left and met her gaze. They were standing close, maybe too close, but that happens when gravity is pulling you down and you’re in a building that’s in the wrong angle than it's supposed to be.

She could feel his warm breath tickling her skin as he inhaled and exhaled. “I’ll go to the.. otherside.” she stumbled as she disconnected her eyes from his. Evan cleared his throat as he agreed with her, “Yes, do that. I’m.. going to set the rope up.” Evan said as he was pulled out of his trance.

“You do that!” (Y/n) said as she grabbed the railing with both hands and let herself slide into the wall to move a little faster. It felt like they were on this call for too long.

As (Y/n) rounded the corner and finally reached the other pair of doors, she again pushed her tool between the two doors and pulled them open. (Y/n) quickly secured her rope to the railing just as Evan did on his side of the hallway. She tightened the knot and gave it a few hard pulls to see if it would hold.

She turned around and looked into the shaft, trying to get a look on how deep it is. “Are you ready for this?” (Y/n) asked Evan as she glanced at him. “Are we really ready for anything?” Evan said as he looked around in the shaft and shrugged his shoulders.

She shook her head as she laughed at the ceiling, typically Evan.

A sigh left her lips as she saw Evan already going over the edge, rippling down. “You coming?” Evan said as he looked up and saw herself starting to second guess her idea. “You’re doing great.” he tried to give her some motivation.

She swallowed as she turned around and let the rope catch her weight. Inch for inch, she let the rope slide through her gloved hands, lowering herself down.

The sound of the elevator shaft creaking was flowing through the space they were in.

Evan looked up at the ceiling, shining his headlight towards the parts above them. On first notice, there was nothing to be seen, but when Evan shone his light right above (Y/n), he could see a large, half broken beam dangling loosely above her side of the shaft. Inches above the doors she had climbed through.

It could fall any moment.

“(Y/n). I need you to stay calm for me, okay?” Evan suddenly said after a few moments of silence. Her stomach turned and filled itself with anxiety at the way he talked. Why was he suddenly talking to her like she was a victim? What was he seeing that she couldn’t see?

“What?” Her confused voice sounded through the shaft as she tried to look over her shoulder at Evan.

“I need you to push yourself with your feet, off the side and reach out for my hand.” Evan tried to stay calm but his eyes stayed right on the large beam a few feet above her head, ready to fall any second.

“Do it now!” Evan called out. There was no time to explain what the hell was going on, she had to trust Evan on his words. So she did exactly what he asked her to do.

She bent her knees as much as she could, so (Y/n) could create enough momentum to reach Evan's side. She pushed as hard as she could and swung from her side of the elevator shaft towards his side. Evan held out his hand as far as he could so he could catch hers.

A loud bang sounded through the shaft as the beam disconnected itself from the shaft.

He could feel her fingers brushing his wrist and clinging onto it as he tightly grabbed hers. Evan was holding all of her weight and gear in his right hand. He let his left hand climb further on her arm and resumed pulling her closer that way.

A groan escaped her mouth as she felt Evan’s nails pinning into her skin. But on that last pull, a yelp fell past her lips and Evan could hear her hissing in pain. Within seconds he had his chest meeting hers. His hands were secured around her waist, and the other one around her upper back, holding her as close as possible.

Evan panted as he put each and all of his energy what was left into that quick stunt they pulled. “Fuck” (Y/n) sighed as she had her arms attached around his back, looking like they were in a hug in the middle of a lift shaft. “Yeah, that was.. unexpected” Evan said as he looked down towards the hole where the beam just fell down.

“That, and.. that beam hit my damn’ left foot.” she hissed as she squeezed her eyes. “Wait what?” Evan said confused as she tried to read her face. (Y/n) let her forehead for a second rest against Evan’s shoulder as she closed her eyes and tried to stop focussing on the pain. “You okay?” his voice sounded worried.

Yes, they were friends and co-workers, nothing more and nothing less. But yet here they are closer than ever before.

“Yeah, for now.. let’s just get down to proper ground. I don’t want another beam falling down onto us.” (Y/n) said as she looked up at the sky, looking for other loose material. “Great idea” Evan said as he let the adrenaline that rushed through his veins calm down.

(Y/n) started to detach her hands off Evan’s back so she could swing her way back towards her side of the shaft. Her palms were awkwardly pushing into Evan’s collarbones, trying to create some distance between the two of them. “Evan? You can let go of me now” she said.

Evan was lost in his thoughts when she called his name. “Oh yeah.. Right. Sorry.” he apologized as he let his eyes connect with hers once again. He could hear her breathe, he could swear that he even heard her heartbeat for a second. They were close, and he didn’t want to let go.

He let go of her back and softly grabbed her wrist to get her back to her side of the shaft slowly and steady. They didn’t want her to bang into the wall with a high force of speed.

His fingers were curled around her wrist, and hers were curled around his. Evan let his other arm slowly become looser around her waist, so now she was only holding his wrist. Gravity slowly lets (Y/n)’s body move towards the middle part of the shaft.

Their hands “Ready?” Evan asked as he kept his eyes on their connected hands. “On three okay?” (Y/n) said as she nodded. “One..two..three.” And on three they both let go of each other's wrist.

(Y/n)’s hand wrapped around the rope which was still attached to her harness as she softly landed her right foot against the side of the elevator shaft. “You good?” Evan asked, wanting to know if she didn’t hurt her left foot by returning to her side of the shaft. A sigh left her mouth, as if she was holding a breath she didn’t know she was holding. “Yes. Let’s just get out of here” she said as she started rippling down towards the ground floor.

The rest of the ride down was silent, beside some creaking and cracking from the building itself. They were just focussing themselves on getting out of that shaft.

When they reached the lowest level they were able to access, Evan opened the doors of his side of the shaft as he explicitly told (Y/n) to hang tight and wait for him. Especially after she hurt her foot, he couldn’t have her risking doing more damage to it than it probably already had.

Evan detached his harness from the rope and hurried towards the other side of the hallway and opened the doors. It was a relief that he could actually walk straight again after all that climbing and sliding down. “Grab my hand” Evan commanded as she lowered herself a little more, so she could touch the ground with her right foot while she let her left foot float above the ground. Evan’s touch made her heart take a little jump.

“Hold on” he said as he placed her hand onto his shoulder, and felt her fingertips burning into his button up shirt. Evan’s hands reached out to her harness as he detached her from the line.

“Thanks” she mumbled as she limped forward, trying to not put any weight on her left foot but she couldn’t help it.

“No, no. You can’t walk on that” Evan said worried as she slightly put some weight on it to keep her balance. “Here, let me help you.” Evan said as he grabbed her left arm and slung it over his shoulders, trying to support her weight.

Groan after groan fell off her lips with every limp, every hop she took. “Are you sure you can make it outside while limping?” Evan asked as she took another hop. “I’ll have to. Unless you have some other theories” she said as she groaned again. Evan pressed his lips into a thin line as (Y/n) leaned her weight onto Evan for another hop.

“It may be faster if I just carried you.” Evan suggested. A yelp left her mouth as her ankle bent to the outside. She wasn’t sure if it was because of Evan’s suggestion or the matter of fact that she already limped almost a hundred times. “Shit” she said as she held onto Evan’s shoulder with her left arm, she felt like a monkey. “Hey, hey, you alright? Seriously you’re going to hurt yourself even more if you keep on hopping onto that leg.” Evan spoke up as he came down to the same height as her.

She didn’t want to tell him he was right, but he was and she knew it. She just didn’t want him to give him the satisfaction. “Let me carry you. Please.” He was practically begging. He didn’t want her to get hurt any more than she already was. A sigh left her mouth as she mumbled an almost inaudible “Okay”.

Evan’s hand wandered towards his radio as he held the button to speak. “We’re almost done. Coming out in a minute.” he said. And he received a small “copy that” from Bobby. Evan’s left arm was already around her waist since he was guiding her just a second ago. He let his right arm slide underneath her knees and he carried her through the hallway to the exit of the building.

Her arms were hanging around his neck, as Evan hurried towards the ambulance. “Got a possible broken foot over here!” Evan yelled as he saw the rest of his team cleaning up the halligans and other equipment they used for the sweep in the lower building. Hen’s eyes shot up as she looked towards the duo that came rushing towards the team. “How the hell-” Hen mumbled as Evan sat (Y/n) down on the back of the ambulance as carefully as possible.

“Don’t ask” (Y/n) said as Hen removed the boot and started to examine her foot. When Hen touched it, (Y/n) hissed at the pain and grabbed Evan’s wrist, she almost crushes and squeezes all of the blood out of his wrist which made Evan groan.

When the grip became looser on his wrist, he moved his hand up, so she was now holding his hand. “Jesus!” she groaned at the touches, and let her forehead fall into Evan’s chest, wishing for the pain to leave her body.

Evan placed his other free hand on the back of her head. “You’re going to be fine” he whispers and let his chin rest on the top of her head.

______

“You’re late” a familiar voice spoke through the apartment as Evan closed the door behind him. His eyes fall on his girlfriend, Taylor, who’s sitting at the kitchen island. Her hands were curled up around the cup of tea she had just made, the steam was still coming off the hot boiling water.

“Hey” Evan simply said as he slowly walked into the room. He let the keys he had in his hand, slowly slide onto the table and let the strap of the duffle bag which he was balancing on his shoulder, fall onto the ground. A sigh left his mouth as Taylor turned on the chair to face him. “I’m so sorry” he continued as he was looking for the right words.

“Hey. I’m sorry. Really Buck? That’s it? That is everything you have to say?” Taylor said as a scoff left her mouth. “You’re unbelievable” her voice continued as Evan’s eyes wandered back to his feet, which were suddenly very interesting to him.

“Didn’t your shift end like, what? Three hours ago?” She asked when Evan didn’t answer her and she blew softly at the water to try to cool it a little bit down. He nodded his head, “Yeah, I’m sorry, we were with the team at the hospital, waiting for (Y/n)’s results” Evan tries to explain to Taylor.

“And she couldn’t do that alone?” she shot back as she took a small sip of her tea and brought the mug down onto the flat surface. Evan was taken by surprise as he didn’t expect Taylor to react the way she just did. “Uhm.. We’re a team. We’re not leaving each other behind.” he spoke as he took place on the opposite side of the dining table, leaning his hands down on the back of the chair. He watched Taylor stirring her spoon in the hot water of her tea.

“Look. I’m sorry I didn’t call you or texted you back. If that’s the thing you’re mad about, then-” Evan tries to apologize, he wasn’t sure what he was apologizing for, but he did it anyways. “It’s okay. It’s fine. Really.” She holds out her hand towards Evan to stop him from talking, as she shoves the chair she was sitting on backwards and starts walking to the kitchen with her cup of tea in her hand.

“You don’t seem fine at all.” Evan says as he pushes his hands off the back of the chair. She placed the full mug of tea on the kitchen counter as she leaned with her palms on the counter. She’s silent. Trying to find the right words. “Taylor… Come on, talk to me. What’s going on?” Evan says as he slowly moves towards the kitchen island now, trying to come closer to her.

With her eyes locked onto the kitchen counter she laughs. “Do you really want to know what the problem is?” her voice sounded somewhat broken. Evan’s voice brought out an almost inaudible yes, but she heard him.

“I was on the scene too.That call of the partly collapsed building that had been split in two” she said. Evan’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. So, she was at the scene? But what had made her so upset that she was mad at him?

”It’s her. Isn’t it?” her broken voice asks him as she keeps her back turned towards Evan. “Who?” his voice immediately asked.

“Come on Buck, I'm not that stupid.” She sighs and pushes herself off the kitchen counter and turns her body around so she is now facing Evan. “I saw the way she clung onto you. The way you looked at her, and cared for her because she was hurt.” her lower back leaned against the kitchen counter now, as she folded her arms over one another.

“Taylor, whatever you saw... it’s not what it looks-“ Evan tries to defend himself as he gets cut off by his own girlfriend. “Then tell me” she shot back at him as she stared right into his soul. “Tell you what?” he could feel and hear his voice slightly rising. “That you love me!” within every word she said, her voice broke more and more.

Evan was silent, he was searching for the words. But he couldn’t say it, not if it was a lie. He had used her all this time, to get closer to (y/n), to make her jealous but it didn’t work. He stayed with Taylor to try and get her attention.

The silence was loud, Taylor had given him enough time to say those three simple words. “Guess I know my answer then.” she says as she storms towards the gaderobe.

“Taylor..” Evan’s voice sounded through the room with her footsteps in the background.

She grabbed the hanger and slid off her coat. “Please wait” he says as his eyes fall onto Taylor as she puts on her jacket and pushes with the back of her hand her red hair over the coat, so it wouldn’t be stuffed into the back of her jacket.

Taylor sighs as she turns around one more time. “I’m done waiting for you, Buck. Why should I be waiting for someone, who’s clearly head over heels in love with someone else?” her voice spoke, and with those words she walked to the door and slammed it shut with a bang.

She was right.

______

(Y/n) put down her mug with tea onto the coffee table as she hopped through the house, trying to put as little weight onto her foot as she could.

She was wearing a brace, luckily her foot was badly sprained. Which means she had to take as much rest as she could, and just let it heal by itself. Right now, she was on pain meds and she at least had to be two weeks off the job, which could be stretched out to three or four, but that was up to how good and fast it would heal.

When the doorbell sounds through the house, (Y/n) turns down the volume of the TV which was currently playing the news and hopped towards the door.

As the doorbell sounds for a second time in ten seconds, a sigh leaves her mouth. “Yeah yeah! Coming!” She calls out. Her hand pushed down the lever of the door, and her eyes met those ocean blue eyes she saw almost every shift.

Evan sounded like he had run the Los Angeles marathon and just got over the finish line. With his arm he leaned against the doorframe, as he heavily breathed.

“Evan? What are you doing here?” She clings on to the door to try and keep her balance, since she was standing like a flamingo and holding her injured foot slightly above the ground. “There’s something I have to say to you.” he said as he was breathing normally again.

“And you couldn’t do that by calling or texting me?” She laughs. Seeing her smile like that made a shiver roll down his spine and his heart almost burst out of his chest. “This is something I'd rather tell you face to face.” he says as he slid both of his hands into his pockets, something he always did when he was nervous.

“Come on in” she says and motioned her head towards the hallway of her home. Evan steps over the threshold, far enough for (Y/n) to close the door. She starts hopping towards the kitchen. “I was just about to drink some tea, do you want anything?”

Evan was in some kind of trance, his heart was beating in his chest. But quickly got pulled out of it when her voice called out his name again. “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“You’re a little dreamy tonight, I asked if you wanted some tea?” she asked again as she tried to keep her balance on her one foot and leaned her hip against the kitchen counter. “Yeah, that sounds good, thankyou” Evan answered. He didn’t want tea. He wanted to spill his guts.

(Y/n) grabbed a cup out of the upper cabinet and poured the warm water from the kettle into the mug. “Hey, have you seen that highway pile up on the news where the 133 worked on?” she asks. “I still wonder how pile ups like that keep happening.” she continues, it honestly felt like she was talking to a wall. She had never seen Evan that quiet.

“Hey, you okay?” (Y/n)’s voice asks as she glances at Evan and gets out a tea bag and disconnects the little string which was attached to it. She limped back to the area where the mug was standing on the counter.

“I love you” the words fell off his lips.

A silence that was so loud filled the room. “What?” the word rolled off her lips. Did she actually hear him right?

“I think that I’m in love with you” Evan says again as he stares into her soul.

“Did you hit your head in that collapsed building?” (Y/n) asks as she throws the tea bag she had put into the water, into the bin and makes a bee line to limp towards Evan.

When she’s in front of Evan, she holds up her index finger. “Can you follow my finger?” she asks and starts moving it from the left side of his face to the right side.

“No I didn’t hit my head, and besides we were wearing helmets” Evan says as he wrapped his hand around her index finger and pushed it down.

“Im serious (Y/n)” Evan let her name roll off his lips, which sent a shiver down her entire body. The hairs on her arms were standing up, goosebumps were spread all over her body.

“From the moment I saw you walking into the firehouse, you’ve had my heart.” he sighs. “It has been kind of exhausting to try and get your attention. And trust me I went far. I went so far that I got into a relationship with someone else, to try and make you jealous” Evan is out here spilling his guts.

He continues his rattle “But if you do not feel the same, all you have to do is say so and I’ll walk back out of that door and we can pretend this never happene-“ But before Evan could finish that sentence, he could feel the collar of his jacket getting crushed.

“Oh, shut up Buckley” She grabbed the collar and pulled him closer until her lips connected with his.

A warm feeling was spreading through her body as she felt his hand touching the back of her neck. Evan let his index finger and thumb of his other hand slip onto her chin, as he gently pushed it up to meet his height.

It almost felt like Evan was the air she needed to breathe and she couldn’t survive without it. One hand was still placed on the collar of his jacket. As the other one wandered to the back of his head, slightly pulling the short curls on his head.

She could feel his warm breath tickling her skin, it was almost like she was back in that building again when she opened the elevator and they were that close.

They both were panting, catching their breaths as they both took each other's breath away.

Evan let his forehead fall against hers as he smiles. “So you do like me.. did I make you jealous as well?” his low voice said as a small laugh left his mouth.

“Maybe.. ” she teased him.

#911 #911 fox #911 abc #911 imagine #buck imagine #buck x reader #evan buckley imagine #evan buckley x reader #evanbuckley #imagine

[quietblueriver]

First Date

Quick little thing. Thanks @gingerniiiija for the prompt!

-

They live on the edge for a while. There’s no war, but the threat looms, and there are too many battles, too many wraiths, new demons, an annoying number of cult-y losers who try, and fail, to pull an Adriel. Things begin to slow, although nobody is really willing to trust it, and then, one Wednesday evening, a tarask shows up to bring Ava some news.

Like an asshole, he shows up in their fucking bedroom, Beatrice out of the bed, out from under Ava, and armed within like two seconds and Ava instinctively sheltering them both in a halo bubble as she scrambles in the bed. When she realizes what’s happening, she groans, flopping back in frustration and pulling her shirt back into place.

“What the actual fuck, man?”

The messenger doesn’t answer, but his massive shoulders move and his head tilts sideways in what Ava likes to think is a flaming, otherworldly demon-ish gesture for, “My bad.”

Beatrice is close to flaming herself at this point and her glare is only mildly less intimidating with her bright red cheeks. She’s pulling her hair back into a bun and has somehow already pulled on sweatpants. Ava mourns.

“This better be good, dude. I was busy.”

It is good, in the end. It’s fucking fantastic. Ava’s crying when she sits up in bed, tosses the crown as quickly as she can before pulling Bea into her. “It’s over, Bea. It’s over. We’re done.”

- They’re not done done, of course. There are still wraiths and weird demons and whatever, still egomaniacs trying to harness supernatural shit to do bad things. But it’s at, like, a normal, manageable level, and, not for nothing, Ava’s now got a (sort of) god on (sort of) speed dial if things get really out of hand. They can relax a little. They can relax a lot, relative to the way they’d been living, and Ava’s ready. She’s got a long list of things she wants to do and she knows exactly where she’d like to start.

-

It’s not that they haven’t had any time together. They share a bed, and they’ve tried really hard to find time to be together outside of work. She has loved the little moments, where they could steal them—tucking herself into Bea’s shoulder for a movie or star-gazing on the roof or taking dinner to the garden, Bea shyly pulling candles from a backpack. She has loved them, and she wants more of them, but she also wants to take Bea into the world. Since she’s been back, every non-work trip outside of the Cradle has been a group outing—some combination of friends and novices and other OCS members. It made sense while the war was still an “any minute now” kind of thing. Safety in numbers and divine protection on her spine and all that.

No more.

She finds Cam and Mother Superion and Dora in Mother Superion’s office while Bea is training a small group of novices who are ready for more advanced sparring.

“Ava!” Camila springs up from her seat to give her a hug, standard practice regardless of the fact that they’d seen each other three hours ago. Ava welcomes it and then stands in front of Superion’s desk, arms crossed. She realizes she might look a little too serious when Superion’s brows furrow and she asks, hand reaching automatically for the spot where Ava knows she keeps a favorite knife, “Is something wrong?”

Forcing herself to relax, she moves her arms to her side and breathes out. “No. No. I’m sorry. Nothing’s wrong. I just…I need a favor.” Superion raises a brow. “I want to take Bea on a date this weekend. In the city.”

A Goldilocks array of grins appears across the three faces in front of her.

Camila, big and beaming, claps her hands and says, “Oh, yay.” Ava smiles dopily back at her, because yeah, oh yay is right.

Superion prompts, after a moment, small but genuine smile still in place, “And how can we help?”

“Right. Yeah. Okay.”

They agree, happily, to keep an eye on things and avoid calling either of them unless it’s absolutely essential, a standard she does not have to explain. They also agree to keep it to themselves until she actually asks Bea. Camila walks out with her, asking about the details of Ava’s plan until they reach the turn for the chapel. Her chest expands as it does sometimes in moments like these, when she realizes she has a friend like Camila, who will get into it with her about plans to take her girlfriend on a date. Gratitude, big and effusive, runs through her.

“You better tell me everything.”

“Of course.” Ava lets her smile shift to something a little less wholesome, and Camila immediately rolls her eyes, pushing her shoulder.

“Not everything. You know what I mean.”

“I do.”

A hug, reflexive and familiar.

“Text me when you actually ask her,” Camila orders as she turns down the hallway.

-

Ava takes a deep breath. Her stomach flips again and she feels silly for being nervous, given that they sleep in the same bed in a very non-platonic way. But like, Bea deserves to have someone be nervous over her. My god, is she the kind of girl to be nervous over. And Ava deserves to get to be nervous over a girl, is fucking outrageously lucky to get to be nervous over Beatrice. Neither one of them got to have this when most people do. It’s a gift to get to have it now. She won’t waste it.

She lets herself enjoy the swoop in her stomach as she says, “Hey, Bea.”

“Hmm?”

They’re finishing lunch, Bea contemplating the fruit on offer for her afternoon snack. Her sharp eyes, having already found both a banana and a pear wanting, are now critically appraising an apple.

“Do you want to go on a date with me tomorrow?”

She feels better now, about her nerves, as Bea’s cheeks shift close to the shade of the apple in her hand. Her wide eyes meet Ava’s and suddenly she’s back in Switzerland, hoping hoping hoping—in the bar, at the farmer’s market, in their tiny kitchen, in their perfect, uncomfortable bed—that maybe the look on Bea’s face means Ava isn’t the only one in trouble.

“That.” Her voice is low and a little rough, and she clears her throat, cheeks even darker. Ava nearly bursts with affection. “That would be nice. Yes.”

Ava kisses her then, because she can, because there are some definite perks to having done basically everything backwards. Beatrice melts into it, strong shoulders relaxing as one of Ava’s arms wraps around them, the other cradling her jaw. She feels Bea’s right arm lift and then drop, limited by the apple, but her free hand settles at the small of Ava’s back. They’re still in the dining hall, even if they are relatively tucked away, so they break apart much more quickly than either of them would like. The blush is still there, but Bea’s eyes are bright with something else now, and Ava lets the halo hum a little as she steps back and reaches for Bea’s hand.

“Cool.”

#avatrice #warrior nun #sister beatrice #ava silva #warrior nun fic #wn prompt fic

[grailfinders]

Grailfinders Viewers' Choice: Mash 2, the Sequel to Mash

 today on Grailfinders, we’re finally heading back to where it all began, and rebuilding Mash Kyrielight one last time. in the three years since we started this thing, we learned a lot about building characters in D&D- and the biggest lesson was that shields suuuuuck. “but Mash is a shielder!” you say, “she needs a shield!” to that, I scoff. Mash needs no shield. she needs to shield. to shield without a shield, this Mash will train her body like never before, and become a Kensei Monk. we also need some extra magic for the ultimate in shields, and for that we need to make a pact and become a Genie Warlock. her dad’s girlfriend has like, three, I’m sure she can give us one.

check out her build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!

Ancestry & Background

good news, sports fans! since the days of the original build wotc has in fact added Eternal Ray of Sunshine as a race! if you’re very generous with how you interpret Custom Lineage, at least. because of that, this Mash gets +2 Dexterity to start, as well as Survival proficiency for camping and the Fighting Initiate feat for Interception. now you can react to an incoming attack on an ally and reduce the damage they take, as long as you’re wielding a weapon. that’s right- shielding. without shields.

Mash is still a Cloistered Scholar though. you don’t have to worry, your History and Arcana proficiencies aren’t going anywhere.

Ability Scores

Mash’s highest ability this time around will be Wisdom. I’m sure most of her foresight comes from scanners or magical whatnots, but when half your dialogue in a singularity is “hey, there’s enemies coming” your passive perception is pretty damn high. second, Charisma. I dare you to look me in the eye and say you wouldn’t give Mash a kidney if she asked. third, Dexterity. that’s how you don’t get hit, and Mash’s giant freakin’ shield tells me she doesn’t get hit often. third is Constitution. I’d love for this to be higher, but everything else on the list is need for multiclassing first and foremost. it’s not ideal, but we’ll make it work. that’s also true for Intelligence, though in that case at least we’d only want it for skill checks. finally, we’re dumping Strength. yes Mash can lift cars, but in terms of servants she’s not offensively powerful. also, we don’t really need this for anything in-build, and we can cover everything strength can do through other means pretty easily.

Class Levels

1. Monk 1: since we got that fighting feat, we need to start off as a monk to qualify. on the plus side, that gets us Unarmored Defense right away, adding our wisdom to our AC as long as we’re not wearing armor or holding a shield. so no problems there. mechanically, our “shield” for this build will be any simple melee weapon (or shortsword) as those all qualify as “monk weapons”, so our Martial Arts work on them. this means they deal a minimum of 1d4 damage, which grows as we level, and you can use your dexterity instead of strength to wield them. also, attacking with your action with either a monk weapon or your fists lets you make another fisting as a bonus action. again, as long as you’re unarmored.

(I know Mash is one of the few servants with actual armor, but tbf it’s missing some pretty key components. also, you can be summer Mash!)

also monks get proficiency in Strength and Dexterity saves, as well as Athletics and Religion checks. now you have all the skills needed to ID servants, and your piddly strength score won’t be too much of a hinderance.

2. Monk 2: second level monks learn to harness Ki, and you get a pool of it equal to your monk level every short rest. you can spend one ki point per turn to dash, dodge, disengage, or attack twice as a bonus action, with dashing and disengaging also doubling your jump distance, again covering for your strength. Mash too is a fighting game character, and is not unaccustomed to sick combos.

she also gets Unarmored Movement, so as long as you don’t put on plate mail you’ll be faster than the average player.

3. Monk 3: at third level you set down the Way of the Kensei and learn the Path of the Kensei. the kensei are good at weapons, not naming things. now you can pick two kensei weapons, a ranged and a melee one. these will become the bedrock of later features, so hopefully you’ve picked out a “shield” by now. while holding a kensei weapon, you can attack with your bare hand to perform an Agile Parry, adding two to your AC for a round. almost like. your weapon is… shielding you, or something.

(you can also use Kensei’s Shot to add more damage to ranged kensei attacks but who cares about that)

finally, you can Deflect Missiles. if you’re being attacked by ranged enemies, you can use a reaction to block their damage- if this prevents the damage entirely, you can then spend a ki point to throw the arrow back. let’s see lancelot bring down a plane on you now.

4. Warlock 1: now that we have the basic functionality of a shield, let’s get ourselves an NP. since you’re kind of family with the Queen of Sheba, you can probably pull some strings and get a Genie to come help you power the Ortinax. right now, that gives you a Genie’s Vessel, a funky lil trinket you can swooce right into as an action. you can stick around inside it for a couple hours, but we’re using it as your invincibility- when you think a big attack’s coming, hold your reaction to bait it out, then let your vessel eat the damage. when it’s destroyed, you pop out like nothing happened. you can enter once a day, and you can make a new one by spending an hour to do so.

while it’s around though, you can use it once a turn to add the Genie’s Wrath to your attacks, adding your proficiency bonus in bludgeoning damage to one of your attacks.

you also learn Pact Magic, spells that use your Charisma to cast and recharge on short rests. Blade Ward is another kind of shield that gives you resistance to physical attacks for a round, and Minor Illusion is an easy way to play a hologram from Chaldea. for your leveled spells, Protection from Good and Evil will protect guda from being possessed, something that’s been happening with disturbing regularity. you can also shield someone with a Sanctuary, forcing a wisdom save on anything that tries to attack them as long as they don’t attack first. it’s a weird shield, but it’s still a shield. I mean Mash’s defense boosts still work if you put her in the backline, so ranged shielding is canon.

5. Warlock 2: second level warlocks get Eldritch Invocations, ways to customize your pseudoservant hell year and come away with a nice goodybag of stuff. you get two this level, but we’ve done this song and dance before- pick whatever you want for #2, it’s getting swapped out next level. still, do make sure you pick up Eldritch Mind now for advantage on concentration saves. tanks need to take hits, and your spells are about damage mitigation so it would be really bad if they went down from the first punch.

you can also Detect Evil and Good now, so you can find any gods or demon god pillars within 30 feet of you. Guda fights a lot of gods, and they’re typically the kind of enemy you don’t want to be ambushed by.

6. Warlock 3: third level warlocks gain a pack boon, and if we want Ortinax running at full capacity we need the Pact of the Blade. now you can summon just about any weapon you want out of the ether as an action, or you can store a specific weapon away for when you need it. speaking of, you can make your shield an Improved Pact Weapon now, an invocation that adds +1 to all your shield’s attack and damage rolls, plus you can use your shield to cast your spells. if you’re going to carry around a giant freakin’ shield, it had better be good for something, y’know?

speaking of shielding, you can now cast second level spells like Ray of Enfeeblement, halving damage from a specific enemy’s strength-based attacks, and making your interceptions and deflections all the more useful. it’s also a cool laser from your shield, so I guess this is the prototype black barrel?

7. Warlock 4: use your first Ability Score Improvement to round up your Dexterity and Wisdom for a much stronger AC and better attacks to boot. you can also Create Bonfire as a cantrip for camping, and you have Warp Sense, letting you detect nearby distortions in reality. this is only supposed to work on portals, but if your campaign revolved around finding seven macguffins from outside of time that were warping the fabric of history to the breaking point I’d say it should work on those too.

8. Warlock 5: fifth level warlocks get third level spells, and now we can shield against even the strongest of spells with Counterspell. if you use a spell slot equal to or greater than the spell you’re blocking, it automatically shuts down whatever nonsense they were planning. otherwise, you’ll need to make a check.

you also learn how to use your bunker bolt, or Eldritch Smite, as the game’s so insistent on calling it. spend a spell slot while hitting something with your shield, and you can send them flying with 4d8 extra force damage, that bonus only growing bigger as you level up.

9. Warlock 6: at sixth level Mash can finally summon supplies from Chaldea, letting her Create Food and Drink. it’s a spell, it creates food and drink, what do you want from me.

less self-explanatorily, your Elemental Gift gives you resistance to all bludgeoning damage to improve your tankiness, and you can spend a bonus action to fly for up to ten minutes. obviously Mash can’t fly, but she can jump good, so it’s practically the same thing.

10. Warlock 7: seventh level warlocks get fourth level spells, and you can finally start killing gods with Banishment sending them back to their home planes. if it’s good enough for Arjuna Alter, it’s good enough for Mash.

you also get a weird shield thanks to the invocation Sign of Ill Omen letting you cast Bestow Curse once a day with a warlock spell slot. that sounds out of character, but the spell does give you the option to enforce disadvantage on attacks against a certain target, so it’s just barely a shield in my book. it also uses a different save than ray of enfeeblement, so it’s a type coverage thing.

11. Warlock 8: now that we’re halfway through the build I can finally nitpick the series a bit. I love FGO, but why does everyone speak the same language? it’s not like Mash could cast Tongues and understand everyone… oh, I guess it is. never mind.

also use this ASI to bump up your Charisma for stronger spells.

12. Warlock 9: ninth level warlock equals fourth level spells. Wall of Stone is a wall… of stone. this is the closest to the classic Lord/Mold Camelot we’re getting, but it’s still a great way to block damage, enemies, or even cross gaps.

if you’d rather leave the gap after you’re done, you can use the invocation Otherworldly Leap to cast Jump on yourself whenever you want- by combining jump and monk’s step of the wind, your 8-strength ass can jump better than a 20-strength barbarian could. sometimes you want to fly, but this way’s practically free.

13. Warlock 10: I’m sorry for sticking extra attack this late into the build, but I thought it was vital that we get Mash to the tenth level of warlock as fast as we could- this is the level you learn Sanctuary Vessel as a genielock, allowing you to pull up to five willing creatures into the vessel with you when you enter it. this means that now you can save the entire party from a noble phantasm by yoinking them all out of existence in a move that would make Teferi proud.

also if they stay in the vessel for ten minutes they get a short rest, which, given how much you rely on those, is a godsend.

I also want Mash to use her sword at least once, so your last cantrip of the build is Sword Burst. why have a sword if you won’t use it.

14. Monk 4: now that we’re finally back in Monk, you can bump up your Constitution with this ASI. you also learn to Slow Fall, reducing fall damage as a reaction, but you can fly, so… yeah, sorry we took such a big detour.

15. Monk 5: with your Extra Attack in hand, you can attack twice in a turn, allowing you to make an unarmed attack to set up your shield, then switch to your shield for big dps. you can also turn any attack into a Stunning Strike, forcing a constitution save on your target or they’re stunned for a round. this both prevents them from making actions, and makes them easier for everyone else to hit. this isn’t in Mash’s usual kit, but if you got hit by a piece of cast iron the size of Rhode Island you’d be stunned too.

16. Monk 6: sixth level monks have Ki-Empowered Strikes, making your fists magical and avoiding a lot of resistances. you also become One with the Blade, making your shield magical as well (it already was), and you can make a Deft Strike once a turn, adding your martial arts die to the damage it does.

17. Monk 7: with your final level of Monk, you learn Evasion, which makes your failed dexterity saves block as much as most people’s successes (half of the damage) and your successes block twice that much (all of it). you carry a giant goddamn shield with you, everywhere you go. it blocks things.

you also get Stillness of Mind, rendering you pretty much immune to charming and frightening effects. you need to keep your wits about you to snap Guda out of them, after all.

18. Warlock 11: warlocks don’t get spell slots past six; instead, you get Mystic Arcanum, which work like regular spell slots from other casting classes, only working once per day. for your sixth level spell, Investiture of Stone grants you resistance to physical damage, and you can ignore difficult terrain made of rock, and also walls made of rock. servants are stupid strong, so walking straight through stone is completely on the table. if you really want to mess stuff up, you can spend an action to stamp on the ground (jump, jump, jump, jump) and move it all around, forcing a dex save on everything around you or knocking them prone. have you seen the FGO movies? it’s easier to list the stuff that servant fights don’t break.

19. Warlock 12: use your last ASI to improve your Dexterity for better attacks and a better AC. you’re a shielder, so those are naturally related. you also get one last invocation, and by now you’ve been using a cutting edge superweapon like a hammer long enough for it to start leaking bad shit everywhere- at least, that’s my explanation as to why it’s a Lifedrinker now. whenever you hit something with Ortinax, it deals extra necrotic damage to boost.

20. Warlock 13: our final level of the build will let us get rayshifting in the first place thanks to Plane Shift, letting us travel to other planes with allies. alternatively, you can weaponize this and try to send someone else to another plane. now even gods from the material world can get black barrel’d!

Pros and Cons

Pros

compared to the OG Mash build, this one has so much more offensive power than before, primarily thanks to the Ortinax coming with more damage bonuses and types to give us some flexibility in combat and a chance for burst damage when the opportunity presents itself.

you also play around short rests a lot, which means you’re never far from full power no matter how late in the day it gets.

the sanctuary vessel is hands down the most powerful defense we’ve ever given a build. when used properly, it can shut down practically any attack you throw its way. not only will it take all the damage from whatever is about to hit you, but it’s an extradimensional space, so arguably effects that only miss through planar shenanigans can be avoided this way. I think this could shut down almost everything I’ve called a noble phantasm in a build up to this point. almost.

Cons

that’s a big almost though- the cost of this extra power is less defense than the original, which admittedly does fit the character. while Ortinax is just as good, if not better, at fighting big singular attacks. however, it fails in two categories- your defense isn’t nearly as good at dealing with multiple smaller attacks, and your HP is so much lower than the original’s.

this is partially caused by the new classes not being full martials with d10s for HP, but it’s also because of how Multi-Ability Dependent this build is. even if we weren’t trying to be a tank, the multiclassing minimums for the build alone are pulling us in three different directions at once. this means that your spell saves are also pretty weak, so your magical blocking isn’t up to par.

when I said you were never far from full power earlier, that was true. buuuut it’s also true about being close to empty too. warlocks and monks are both famously bad at resource management, and if you go into two or more fights between short rests you’re liable to run out of resources no matter how carefully you play.

#fgo #fate grand order #D&D 5e #DND #Mash Kyrielight #Monk #Warlock

[heyclickadee]

Okay, here’s the thing (again) about Sabine being force sensitive:

Force sensitivity isn’t a thing. At least, not in the way we tend to talk about it in the fandom. The way we tend to talk about it, the way we’ve talked about it for decades, has always been as though it’s a hard binary. You’re born force sensitive, and if you are there’s a limited range of how force sensitive you can be; or you’re not, and if you’re not, you just can’t use the force. Ever. But that concept doesn’t come from the films. That’s not how anyone ever really talks about it. It’s always, “strong with the force” or “the force connects all living things” and “luminous beings are we” and such; and midichlorians did muddy the waters a bit, but everyone has them. That binary way of looking at force sensitivity—even the phrase force sensitivity—is something that really came from rpgs and the EU, but it’s become so entrenched in fandom that we all just assumed it was how it worked in canon. I get why people are having a hard time wrapping their heads around the idea that’s presented in Ahsoka.

And I get why people are having such a hard time with Sabine being able to use the force. If you’re coming to what we see her do in Ahsoka from the perspective of that “born force sensitive or not” binary, then you’re going to come away thinking that the reason Sabine was so skilled in Rebels was that she was just born special and magic, and that read does take away a lot of what made Sabine such a good character in Rebels. But I don’t think that’s the intent, and I don’t think that read jives with what we’re presented with on screen.

The Force exists in the galaxies far, far away. It’s strange, mysterious, and inhabits all living things. Everything is connected to it. Some beings, like Ezra, show more of an aptitude to tap into that connection at a young age—think of force sensitive as meaning something more akin to “talented” or “gifted”—the same way that some people in the real world show more of an aptitude for music or running in the real world, and those beings tend to be the ones the Jedi focus on training.

And then some beings, like Sabine, don’t show that aptitude from a young age, if ever in their lives. But that connection to the force still exists, and even people who don’t pop out wildly talented can, with a lot of time and effort, learn to tap into and harness that connection to the best of their ability. Raw talent is (or can be) a factor in who decides to or gets to train, but hard work and discipline matter, too. Sabine wasn’t an incredibly skilled and capable warrior in Rebels because she just happened to be magic and force sensitive all along, because she wasn’t. She’s able to tap into the force a little bit now because she’s smart, stubborn, applied the same hard work to learning to wield the force as she would to learning to use a jet pack, and beat the two or so total midichlorians she has into submission. It’s another skill that she can learn, and she did, to some extent.

Anyway, tl;dr: I am living for the clarification that using the force doesn’t depend on a person being born with super special magic genes and that it’s a skill (or set of skills) that can be taught rather than an RPG-style superpower.

#ahsoka series #ahsoka spoilers #ahsokaspoilers #anyway you know how #in Trials of the Darksaber #Hera’s all ‘oh you don’t think she can do it because she does have the force’ #and then Kanan replies ‘Nah EVERYTHING has the force she’s just blocked’

[restforthe-burdenedsoul]

Trying to do a daily morning training walk with her while there’s no dogs. She did so great! She barked at everyone we saw, but we did 1-2-3 and by the count of 2 she’s looking at me and 3 she’s quiet. It’s amazing!

We worked with the trainer for only a couple months, but she helped us so much. I can only imagine what more training could have done. Once I get a job secured we plan to hire another trainer.

Something about having someone there with us was helpful. I knew a lot of these tricks, but just didn’t have the patience to practice them over and over and it’s hard when there isn’t a stimulus. But the trainer is the stimulus (for her)

There’s a neighbor that has a dog behind a solid fence. Can’t see through it. I’m hoping we encounter it on a walk so we can sit across the street and practice. Not for a length of time that would be an annoyance. But it barked the whole time I walked the fence. So we’d be across the street hearing it and practicing.

She’s also doing much better with her arch nemesis Grace. They have played a couple of times now and while they still get jealous, a firm “lay down” while holding her harness has been enough that she isn’t flying off the couch snapping at her and they can both settle down.

Yesterday, roomie had Mel and grace sat between me and M. Once Mel was calm, roomie let her go and she snuggled up between me and grace.

Food is still an issue, but not one we’re really working on solving. Mel eats in her crate because she’ll eat their food too (so will her sister). I usually fix Mel’s food and crate her because she takes the longest to eat with her puzzle, then grace because her mom mixes it with a bunch of nutritional things, and harmony last because she’s the fastest eater. I did it backwards yesterday and Mel came over before I put graces food down, but they got mad and grace had her pinned to the floor. Ugh. I’m hoping things don’t end up escalating one day, but it seems like Mel is trying to “correct” grace (herding genes) and grace then gives warnings. Mel nips her sometimes, but I think that’s herding as well. 

But overall, the two seem to be learning how to diffuse other ways. Mel will play with harmony and grace chews on her blanket. We’ve been able actually pet grace and play with her while Mel is out. We couldn’t do that a month ago. They had to be in totally different rooms.

#reactive dog #anxious dog #australian shepherd #mini aussie #dog training

[bloomingflowersthings]

Roadtrip sniffles

Pairings: sick! Kate Bishop x reader, WandaNat, Yelena is there too

Summary: When you finally get some time to unwind from work and travel with your friends, it seems that a certain archer is not feeling too hot.

Notes: Sorry about the title lol, also, thank you guys for the support! it seems like you really enjoyed my last fic and all i have to say is thank you!! I would like to announce that my requests are open, so if you have any ideas please send them in!! hope you like it! <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The last mission exhausted the avengers. The team had to implode a Hydra facility and everyone worked a lot for it. After debriefing at the compound, Cap decided that everyone deserved a week off to recharge their batteries.

Tony and Pepper decided to go on vacation, Thor returned to Asgard, Clint went back to his house and the rest were just chilling around the tower. So you and the girls decided to spend your week off at the beach. It would be fun and a way of bonding with each other.

Wanda, Natasha and Yelena were in one car and you and Kate were in the other, since you both were taking Fanny and Lucky.

“Are you ready Kate?” You asked, while attaching Lucky’s harness to the seatbelt

“Yup, just have to grab my backpack real quick” The archer called out, entering the compound to grab her things

After making sure both puppies were safely secured, Kate was already entering the car, backpack in hands.

“I’m glad we’re doing this, it’s a great opportunity to relax!” You said, starting to drive

Kate nodded, putting her seatbelt on “It’s- Hh gonna be -Hhh fun!” she managed to say between hitching breaths.

Without taking your eyes off the road you asked: “Darling, are you okay?”

“Hh’Tsshh! Hhxngtt'shh! Hh'iTshh!" She stifled a set of sneezes in her elbow.

“Bless you!” you giggled, not thinking much about her outburst, “there’s tissues in the glove compartment if you need them.”

“I’ll be alright” Kate said, while yawning.

“You tired? maybe you can take a nap, it’ll be a long road trip and the dogs are already sleeping”

“Maybe I can take a nap, you should wake me up when you want to switch places”

“Shush, just rest for now” You knew Kate had to be exhausted. She had a rough final’s week since her roommate managed to catch a nasty cold and she had to take care of her while studying. And when she got to the compound the archer was training nonstop, some rest was seriously overdue, even though she would never admit she was tired.

Glancing over at her the first thing you noticed was the dark circles under her eyes poor thing… However, another thing caught your attention towards her features. She looked pale, and her nose was red and chapped. Was she getting sick? Refocusing your thoughts on the road, you decided to brush it off, she just had a rough couple of weeks, that’s all. right?

About an hour later, all of you decided to take a pit stop at a cafeteria. Wanda was carsick, Yelena was hungry and the dogs needed to pee. Turning off the car you looked over to your girlfriend again. She looked so peaceful that you didn’t want to wake her up. Until her nose started twitching…

“Hhep’tSHHIEW!” She ducked her head inside her shirt, sneezing loudly into it, “Hh’uptSHHIEW!”

“Wow Katie! bless you! you alright?” You asked, concern slipping into your features as you rubbed her shoulder lightly.

“Yeah, i’m fine! it must be allergies or something.” she said, while rubbing her eyes.

“Hmm… I’m keeping my eye on you.” You said while narrowing your eyes as she gave you a light playful slap on you arm.

After the both of you took the dogs out, you finally reunited with the rest of the girls.

“Pleaaaase, i’m begging, just take Yelena with you I can’t take one more minute having to be in the same space as her” Natasha said as her sister shoved her lightly

“Sorry Tasha, it’s either Yelena or the dogs” You said chuckling.

“I still prefer the dogs” The redhead said, while shrugging dramatically.

“Haha very funny sestra.” Yelena said while rolling her eyes, a big grin plastered on her face.

“You doing better Wands?” You asked, noticing that the witch wasn’t as pale as before

“A little, just needed some air.” She said, smiling as natasha rubbed her shoulder.

“Kate needed a little air too, right Kates?” You said, bumping her hip.

“Hhup’tshiew! Hh-’iishiew! HHe’TSHHIEW! whew! excuse me!” Kate said, her cheeks glowing red with embarrassment.

“See, the mini archer is allergic to cheesy couples, you are a threat to her health!” Yelena said, gesturing to Wanda and Natasha.

Everyone laughed and blessed Kate and you all headed inside the cafeteria (which thankfully was pet friendly) to grab some snacks.

After everyone finished eating, you all started to get ready to get in the cars again.

“Yelena, i’ll be in control of the music now, your musica taste is good, but a little old.” The widow said, tired of hearing “miss american pie” for more than ten times in a row.

“My music isn’t old! it’s good quality music!”

As the sisters argued, Kate was rubbing her nose, trying to get rid of the annoying tingle in her sinuses.

“Hh-itshhiew! HhH’uptshiew! sorry, i’m gonna grab some tissue real quick” The archer said.

As soon as she entered the restroom, Wanda approached you.

“Y/N, i’m sensing some discomfort in her, is she feeling well?” she asked you, concern clear in her features.

“I don’t think so, but she won’t admit it, and I don’t wanna pressure her” You answered, honestly.

“Make sure to take care of her”

“I will”

as Kate returned, Natasha spoke: “So, everyone is ready to go?”

Everybody agreed and you got in the car, in your original positions.

“Wait, you don’t want to switch places?” Kate asked. You had just recently overcome your fear of driving, so she wanted to make sure that you were confortable.

“Thanks baby, I’m good!” You answered, if you said you were relaxed, you would be lying, but she clearly needed the rest.

“Hh-itshhiew! HhH’uptshiew! ugh sorry” she said as she reached for the tissues.

“You’re not feeling well, are you?” You said, pure love showing in your words.

“I’m not feeling too hot” The archer admitted.

You reached her forehead, frowning at the heat radiating from her. “I have to disagree with that, you’re really hot baby, I think you’re running a fever.”

“It wasn’t that bad, I thought I could sleep it off on our way to the beach, I’m really sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize, I’m always gonna take care of you, now try and sleep a little sweetie.” You said, giving your girlfriend a quick kiss on her temples.

You sent the girls a message to tell them the situation, and gave one more look at Kate, who was already asleep. She looked so peaceful, and beautiful, you couldn’t understand how she could look like a angel even while sick.

A few hours later, all of you finally arrived to the beach, and Kate was still in deep sleep. Feeling her forehead, you noticed that she was significantly warmer than earlier.

You decided to let her sleep for a little longer while you grabbed your things.

“How’s the little Bishop doing?” Yelena asked

“I think her fever spiked, she’s still sleeping in the car.” You answered

With everyone’s help, you quickly got your things inside the house.

“Kate, we’re here, c’mon, let’s get you inside” You said, while helping her out of the car.

She leaned against you, shivering as you got upstairs and sat her on the bed.

“I’m gonna make her some soup” Wanda said. “I’ll help you” Yelena added, and they both went downstairs.

“Y/N, I think she needs a shower in order to break that fever, you should help her out while I’ll go out and buy her some medicine” Natasha said, worried about her friend’s state

As the redhead exited the room, you turned to your girlfriend, who had fallen asleep again.

“Kate? how about we take a shower?” You kindly asked, gently massaging her scalp

“I’m too cold…” the archer answered, her voice was already hoarse and congested, making you wonder if her throat was hurting.

“It’s your fever that’s making you feel funny, but a quick shower might fix that, and i’ll be with you the whole time” you offered.

She nodded in approval and you helped her up, heading towards the bathroom. You turned on the shower, making sure to adjust the water temperature. You helped her out of her clothes.

As soon as she touched the water, her shivering intensified, and you felt guilty. You made sure to wash her body and hair and her chills became almost nonexistent, which meant that her fever probably broke.

“Thank you Y/N, i’m a little better now” Kate said, looking at you lovingly, and you noticed that she wasn’t as flushed as before.

“You welcome kitten, now let’s get you in the couch so you can eat and rest a little.”

As you finished helping her in her clothes and wrapping her up in a blanket, Wanda and Yelena returned with a tray of soup for everyone. It smelled amazing and everyone was hungry. They sat on the enormous sofa along with you and the dogs. You all decided to watch friends while eating.

“Even though I can’t fully taste it, this soup is amazing, thank you girls.” Kate said.

“Don’t mention it” Wanda replied

“I bet my macaroni and cheese is better, but this soup is tasty” Yelena said

“So y’all making a little party without me?” Natasha said, leaning against the doorframe, pharmacy bag in hand.

“Actually, we were just waiting for you to get the party started, come sit with us” You said, tapping the cushion.

Kate took a dose of the medicine and started to feel a little drowsy, she snuggled closer to you, closing her eyes.

“Thank you for taking care of me, girls.”

“We are your family, We’ll always take care of you.” you said while kissing her forehead.

She was glad to have a big loving family.

#sickfic #snzfic #sick! kate bishop #sick! kate bishop x reader #kate bishop sickfic #kate bishop x reader #wandanat #yelena as a third wheel

[kindheart525]

It was a great night to be out on the town on this Friday night. Ponies were bustling with activity, some going home after a long week of work and others finding a little fun to kick off their weekends. Either way, for many it was a night of fun, or at least relief.

Three young stallions were having a bit of fun of their own. Freshly starting their EMT training, they were seriously devoted to their work, but still undisciplined thrill-seekers like many their age. EMT school was a lot of work so they needed a way to unwind, which the three buddies were doing well as they stumbled out of a pub.

“Did I kill it at karaoke or what?”

One of the stallions, Lemon Wedge, bragged while making finger guns with his wings and jokingly acting like he was hot shit.

“Killed everypony’s ears, maybe!”

His friend Swift Valor retorted. They’d been hanging out for long enough that this was lighthearted banter and not a genuine insult. 

“I dunno, there was that one lady who was watching you all night!”

The third stallion, Golden Opportinity, added.

“Those pipes could get you a date!”

“Aww yeah!”

Lemon pumped his hoof and the three of them erupted into uproarious laughter. They were all rather tipsy, not enough to get into too much trouble but definitely enough to be a bit unaware of their surroundings. A passing couple shot them a glare for disturbing their night, but they hardly noticed.

They were wandering the streets pretty aimlessly until Lemon stopped in his tracks.

“Guys, it’s like, 9pm. What are we doing?”

“Going home?”

“Why, to feed your weasel?”

The other two stallions started snickering but Golden became defensive.

“Noodle is a ferret! And yeah, I gotta be responsible and shit!”

“Didn’t you call your sister or somepony to do that? You’re already being responsible.” 

Swift wasn’t particularly concerned about the ferret, but he did want his friend to stop worrying so much and have fun with him. Even through the buzz he was able to use logic to convince him to let loose.

“Oh yeah!”

Golden carried on following his friends, his hesitation quickly dissolved.

The three stallions continued down the street, bantering and looking around for something to do. Most places on this Canterlot street were too stuffy and frou-frou for their tastes, so their options were already limited.

“What about that place?”

Swift pointed out a storefront that stood out from the rest. It was just as fancy and refined, but the outside decorations had more of a whimsical quality to them, it was unique.

“Isn’t that like, the psychic place?”

“Yeah, I think so. It’s probably a big scam but we’re messing around anyway, we’ll just see what it’s about.”

“Yeah, sure, we got nothing better to do.”

His friends murmured in agreement and proceeded to follow him in.

“Not like anything will come of it.”

*****

Prophecy had been running her shop for a good while now and it was everything she dreamed of and more. The space was small but it was hers, a place to harness her powers on her terms and connect with ponies who needed her help. She planned her schedule so she wouldn’t be overworked at all, so she could actually enjoy her gift.

On Friday nights she had a few evening hours to catch the early-weekend crowd, but now it was getting late and she was closing up her shop for the night. Until the doorbell jingled and several ponies came in for her services.

Great.

Prophecy was usually pretty patient, but she was always irritated by ponies who came in at the last minute. Her hours were right on the door! Oracle was a serious art, it wasn’t like going into a store and picking up a few last-minute gifts.

But she came out of her office with a pleasant smile on her face, greeting the guests with the same politeness as always.

“Welcome! How are you doing tonight?”

The three stallions stood around her shop, looking around as if in a daze. She’d decorated her space to have a dream-like quality. but she didn’t think it’d make ponies actually think they were dreaming. But they were swaying slightly and mumbling like they were drunk. That explained it.

She recognized one of them from her foalhood days, calling him out to get his attention.

“Hello, Swift! It’s nice to see you!”

“Oh! Prophecy!”

Swift snapped out of his stupor, having been quite disoriented entering this more serene space after trotting among the bright lights and bustling energy of the city.

“You work here?”

“Dude, you know her? Is she your girlfriend?”

His friends started laughing at him as he quickly shot a glare at them.

“Shut up! We just went to school together.”

He turned back towards Prophecy, leaning on her desk as casually as he could manage.

“Are you here for a fortune?”

She cocked an eyebrow, a bit peeved that these guys didn’t appear to be taking her space or her time seriously.

“Damn, I can’t believe you’re still into this oracle shit.”

Swift chuckled wryly, not mincing his words very well. This only made Prophecy even more annoyed.

“Shit?”

“Yeah—I mean, no—like, it just never made sense, you know? You predict stuff with data and facts, and like, observing the world around you. Not magic. It kinda seems like you’re getting paid to read the weather report.”

Prophecy didn’t remember Swift being quite this stuck-up as a kid but she didn’t like it one bit. She’d dealt with her fair share of skeptics, but this one especially grinded on her nerves. He knew her just enough that what would be annoying banter felt like a personal insult.

“Well, this is literally my cutie mark, so it’s real whether you can wrap your head around it or not.”

She retorted.

“Yeah, but it could have been a coincidence! You always believed in fairy tales even when you were too old.”

“And I watched you cry so hard you threw up because Eru wouldn’t share his little blue wagon with you. You were almost 10. So I guess we’re even.”

“OHHHH!”

Swift’s friends screamed as his face grew hot with embarrassment, and for a moment Prophecy felt a petty sense of satisfaction. It wasn’t usually in her nature, but it was just too easy to put him in his place.

“Fine, fine.”

He tried to save face, cooly tossing a few bits over to her.

“Give us some predictions, and if they come true, maybe I’ll reconsider.”

“Deal.”

She agreed to satisfy him, though she really didn’t care about convincing stubborn ponies.

Then she turned to the other two stallions.

“What are your names?”

Lemon Wedge and Golden Opportunity mumbled out some introductions, and Prophecy immediately got to work. She inspected each stallion closely, taking note of every minute detail in their mannerisms. Then she took a box out from under her desk, filled with all of her best supplies.

“Bro, what’s she doing?”

They began to whisper amongst each other as she shuffled through her things, her mind firing off with visions of what was in store for these stallions.

It wasn’t good.

“Golden Opportunity.”

The stallion quickly stood up straight at his name, Prophecy’s voice holding such authority that for a moment, he almost believed in her. Just an instant.

“Your life may seem golden now, but it will not always be so. One day soon, you will lose a dear friend and you will have to learn to stand on your own.”

She placed a small glass figurine of two ponies on her desk, symbolizing close bonds.

“Lemon Wedge.”

For the next stallion, she held up a deck of playing cards.

“You’re a go-getter. You take risks. But too much of this will be your downfall. If you do not rein yourself in, you will suffer great losses.”

The pegasus rolled his eyes at her but she didn’t see it, quickly turning to face the smug visage of Swift Valor.

She was ticked off at all of them, but she wasn’t making their fortunes bad on purpose. She was just interpreting the visions she had. But staring at Swift’s cocky smile, she wanted nothing more than to see it wiped off his face. For him to see the truth.

“Swift Valor, you regard yourself with as much value as your possessions are worth; it has always been this way. If you do not humble yourself, you’ll find yourself dispossessed and with a cracked ego.”

To demonstrate, she held up a cheap bar of fool’s gold and smashed it on her desk, doing so with a bit more vigor than her job called for. She was really going for the dramatics.

His friends were a bit startled by this, but Swift just nodded nonchalantly.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll let you know when that happens, if it does.”

He started making his way for the door, his friends trailing after him.

“Nice to see you again, Prophecy. Tell Eru and your moms I said hi, alright?”

Though he bid her farewell like an old friend, his attitude leading up to that moment completely soured it for Prophecy. But she didn’t spend any time dwelling on it, she moved right on with her life and started cleaning up. They weren’t her problem anymore, whether they believed her was their perogative.

But the predictions didn’t lie.

~~~~~~~~~~

Previous: Plain Sight Next (for Swift): Broken Mirror Next (for Prophecy): Iconoclast

#KindsArt #auraverse #red string #prophecy #swift valor #lemon wedge #golden opportunity #story piece #next generation #my little pony #mlp fim #mlp g4

[swordandboardllc]

"Thunder Dog", A Review and Personal Anecdote

The Review

Thunder Dog is the dual story of Michael Hingson and his guide dog, Roselle, surviving the descent from the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001. It is also the biography of Hingson living with a disability in the United States and the challenge of living blind in a world designed for the sighted. It is a moving biography worth reading in and of itself. But perhaps it has come back into greater relevance with today’s discussion of emotional support animals and service dogs in the news.

The book is titled Thunder Dog after Roselle. Roselle, like any service dog, is at her core still a dog. Michael Hingson’s highly trained service dog, off duty, is afraid of thunder. In the wee hours of September 11th, there was a thunderstorm and Hingson woke up to a frightened dog. He left the bed to comfort Roselle. Later that day, harness on, Roselle ignores the sound of explosions and scent of jet fuel to safely guide Hingson down 1400+ stairs and through the chaos that was Ground Zero. Hingson frankly writes about the challenges of being a service dog handler, from the idiosyncrasies of working with animals — often trained to be intelligently disobedient to prevent their handlers from hurting themselves — to the challenges of dealing with able-bodied people. While I cannot place where in the book the comment is from, Hingson states that to him the more interesting story isn’t how he and Roselle got down the stairs. The interesting story is how a blind man became a successful businessman and was on the 78th floor to begin with — a story told interspersed with the descent from the North Tower. I agree with Hingson. It is an incredible story.

As a formerly able-bodied person coming to terms with limitations, it’s poignant to see how Hingson handles the challenges placed in front of him from both the well meaning and the ignorant. It is a book that I believe would encourage a little more understanding from both sides of the able/disabled spectrum.

"Service animals are defined as dogs that are individually trained to do work or perform tasks for people with disabilities. Examples of such work or tasks include guiding people who are blind, alerting people who are deaf, pulling a wheelchair, alerting and protecting a person who is having a seizure, reminding a person with mental illness to take prescribed medications, calming a person with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) during an anxiety attack, or performing other duties. Service animals are working animals, not pets. The work or task a dog has been trained to provide must be directly related to the person’s disability. Dogs whose sole function is to provide comfort or emotional support do not qualify as service animals under the ADA."  -- Americans with Disabilities Act, https://www.ada.gov/service_animals_2010.htm

A Different Handler’s Story

“Are you training him for someone?”

“Yes, me.”

Chekov and I are not a normal team. He is a glorious rescue mutt. We think he’s a shepherd/husky/cattle dog mix. I am thin, young, and look perfectly healthy on the average day — if you don’t realize my shoulder dimples are in fact, shoulder subluxations. We’re working with an unconventional company to train him. Most of the time, people are quite pleasant when they speak to me about Chekov. Perhaps it’s the “resting bitch face”, or the decade training horses, that has given me a stronger no-nonsense vibe. Most skeptics seem to avoid confrontation with us, preferring to shoot dirty looks our way. But talk to anyone who has been a handler for long enough and you’ll find horror stories. I’m waiting for ours, because it will come.

Intelligent disobedience is the animal’s act of disobeying a command that will cause a handler harm. Chekov is a medical alert dog, trained to let me know when my body is about to throw me a curve ball. As a stubborn horsewoman, I rarely listen. Chekov knows it’s his job to make me stop and listen to him. He’s discovered the most effective way to do so: inform the world that he has husky vocal chords and husky lungs. Chekov will start with a light “tweety” sound before all out shrieking at me. He does this both at home, and in public. His last song was in the wine section of our grocery store — hardly the place I wanted to sit down on the floor!

"A person with a disability cannot be asked to remove his service animal from the premises unless: (1) the dog is out of control and the handler does not take effective action to control it or (2) the dog is not housebroken. "  -- Americans with Disabilities Act, https://www.ada.gov/service_animals_2010.htm

A singing husky is not out of control, and we cannot be asked to leave due to Chekov performing a task. But I’m quite certain it is what will run us into access issues in the future. There are plenty of reasons why a service dog might bark or make noise. Most of the time, it means a handler could very well be in distress within a few minutes or few hours and needs the time to react. Please give handlers space if you hear their dog bark.

But how do i spot a fake?

You don’t!

There are no registries for service dogs in the United States (other countries have different regulations). No companies that a person must go through. Service dogs have bad days. They’re not robots, and sometimes they’re just tired/sore/woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Hassling a handler — who likely is having a bad day too — is simply cruel.

If you see a dog that is misbehaving and the handler is doing nothing to stop it, the best action to take is alerting the management in charge of the facility you’re in and let them handle it.

"When it is not obvious what service an animal provides, only limited inquiries are allowed. Staff may ask two questions: (1) is the dog a service animal required because of a disability, and (2) what work or task has the dog been trained to perform. Staff cannot ask about the person’s disability, require medical documentation, require a special identification card or training documentation for the dog, or ask that the dog demonstrate its ability to perform the work or task."  -- Americans with Disabilities Act, https://www.ada.gov/service_animals_2010.htm

Lastly, please remember that these dogs are not robots. When someone brings a pet into a service dog only area, it is an unfair distraction to the service dog. Even if your dog is well behaved, it needs to stay at home. If your dog has health issues, then it should go to a dog day care with attached vet — not with you everywhere. Chekov has been charged several times by off leash or uncontrolled dogs. While we are working on desensitizing him to the sudden appearance of dogs in places they shouldn’t be, it is an unfair double standard to expect no reaction from a service dog if a pet is barking aggressively at them. There is an understandable higher expectation of training and behaviour of a service dog. But every pet owner should train their dog and expect excellence. Our dogs, after all, only know what we teach them.

— L.J & Chekov

#Thunder Dog #September 11 #9/11 #biography #memoir #book review #service dog #guide dog #emotional support animal #ground zero #blindness #disability

[blueboyluca]

Brainstorm with me?

I’d love to get some input on two things I need to fix. If you have ideas or thoughts on how I could approach these things or how you did something similar, please let me know.

1. Consent signal / start button behaviour

I was using a combination of tug, nose touch and warm up behaviours as consent tests for Marcie, but perhaps I need something that comes before this? These behaviours are not always perfect indicators that she is definitely ready to train.

Sarah Stremming says:

The first piece in this process is just establishing a novel and usable behaviour that can be done before work begins. Some examples would be: eye contact, lining up at your side, a nose target, or even harnessing or collaring up. Once the behaviour is established we will teach the dog that the behaviour predicts work, but not yet!

The best examples are the stationing ones, but I’m not sure that’s the best approach for a consent signal before agility training. Should I stick with a nose touch? Or is that too much pressure, perhaps something that the dog needs to do on its own without my signal?

2. Leash up behaviour

This is similar to a consent signal, but this one I need to troubleshoot a lot more. Marceline has a consent signal for being leashed up and it’s to walk to the front door and wait for me to put her harness on. However, she only does this some of the time. She is very observant and knows what I wear to just go for a walk vs what I wear to go to the beach vs what I wear to go to agility training. She is also more likely to give consent when Luca is also going with us. She also knows which harness means car and which means neighbourhood walk.

Obviously, Luca doesn’t always go with us. When I need to leash her up to go somewhere without him, she knows this and doesn’t give consent and instead hangs back under the table where I can’t reach her. I’m ashamed that it’s at this point because I feel rotten having to grab her and leash her up when she is clearly saying no.

How can I change this? I don’t want to trick her by changing up what I wear or what harness she wears. I want to be very honest about what we’re doing: you’re going to wear this harness which means we are going in the car and I’m wearing these clothes because we’re going to agility. I want to make the conditioned emotional response a good one instead of a bad one.

Last week I kind of (?) tricked her by picking her up from the couch and putting her harness on, but then I waited for her to come to the front door on her own before leashing her up. I felt this was good progress, but the harness part is still not ideal. Any ideas on how I can make this process better?

I don’t have this problem with Luca at all because he has a strong reinforcement history of leashing up leading to a fun experience. While I thought Marceline has had the same history, obviously something has soured it. I think it’s the car association – she doesn’t actually like travelling in the car, but she will consent to it if Luca is coming. When I have to take her in the car on her own, she rescinds her consent.

#dog training #dogblr

[theadventurek9]

Two weeks with Rebel!

It’s been two weeks since we brought the little pipsqueak home.

She is starting to gain more weight and really is settled into our home. She is confident and overall a joy to be around. Her favorite toy is a wand with feathers, but really likes anything with feathers in general. She likes to carry and drag it around the house if we let her. She currently is also carrying socks around the house as well. She sleeps almost completely through the night cuddled up with us. (Two adult humans, Aayla and her on a queen…it’s starting to get scrunched!) she will wake up and ask for pets sometimes but isn’t too obnoxious about it.

She has great bite and clawing inhibition. Even though we get the normal pounces and bites and clawing from her playing and just being a kitten, she hasn’t drawn blood on any of us. She has great control of her claws (don’t know if I have met a cat like that!) and is gentle overall with her play. Still trying to redirect to toys but the partner likes wrestling with her so it may never go away. I’ve done the normal (you can’t complain when she is an adult) talk with him. I think her temperament is great and it shouldn’t be much of an issue anyways, though I do my best to not encourage it.

Aayla and Rebel get along way better than I expected. Aayla is showing a lot less herding and overall controlling behavior than I thought she would. She isn’t guarding the bed or being bad about muzzle punching when Rebel is jumping up and down off of things. We’ve had some mild RG with chews and while Aayla is eating. Mostly her normal stiffening, lip raised and some growling. Yet she easily lets me step in and remove Rebel and give a treat. Honestly I don’t mind that much that she is a little guardy of these things with animals. I’ve had to intervene with playing less and less. Aayla is still being a bit much but luckily Rebel seems to enjoy all the chasing and playing. They will snuggle on the bed together and overall are coexisting very well.

Training is going great. She has a pretty solid understanding of touch. Being a young kitten she isn’t always as interested in working with us, but understands the concept well. Also working on a go into the crate behavior which she is doing well with right now. I’m starting some handling stuff soon (nail trims) and Eric wants to start teaching her sit.

Leash training is going great. Putting the harness on with putting her head through the front is adversive to her (step in harness coming soon!) so she doesn’t like that but holds still for it to be fastened! Once it’s on she doesn’t seem to care and acts like normal. So I would say we’ve conditioned well to wearing the harness. Having the leash attached is still a little bit of work with conditioning. She gets a little unsure when the leash is in front of her and backs up a bit but recovers quickly. The outside work is just improving, she is getting more and more confident. Starting to engage in some play and more walking around. She likes hanging out on our shoulders so that’s great too.

Overall things are going fantastic. We’re hoping that she may be ready for her first easy camping trip by next month. Probably somewhere local and just for one night.

#adventure cat #cat training #Rebel #cat #kitten

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

Names, News and Nominations

Summary: After the sports festival, things should be smooth sailing. Except, of course Izuku finds that it’s not true. The news of Sir Nighteye’s death is a hard one, but he’ll pull through as he and his classmates get ready for their internships! Even if they all seem eager to make him blush still!

ON AO3

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After school, Izuku headed to the principal’s office, where Nezu happily let him inside, the mammal’s eyes shining.

 “I am eager to work with you later on,” Nezu said to Izuku cheerfully. “But ID here will be a good substitute for me.”

 “You’re just saying that 'cause you taught me to,” snorted one of the people in the office.

Info Dropper, or Goblin Izuku supposed, did not draw the eye. They were average height and bulky with muscle but otherwise looked utterly plain. They wore a black face mask and circular glasses, which made their dark eyes seem wider. Their hero costume consisted of a dark jacket and a pair of blue jeans. Under the coat glinted a leather harness holding multiple items, a gun one of them. But only when you were close to them. Otherwise, they looked like any other person on the streets.

 “Nice to meet you, kid,” Info Dropper said, bowing their head. “I’m Info Dropper or ID. Goblin while on duty in Otheon, but ID otherwise.” They motioned to the woman beside them. She wore all black, a turtleneck bodysuit, a trench coat and boots though some iridescent decals were on them. A visor with the same colouring as the decals covered her face.

 “Hi! I’m Statistica or Elric Aria!” said the woman, bowing her head too. “ID here doesn’t use names or give theirs out due to their Quirk, so don’t be offended by any nickname.”

 “Oh? I tried to search it up, but the Court doesn’t list Quirks for their members….” Izuku said slowly.

 “It’s called Name Drop. I say someone’s name, chosen ones work too, and I know five random things about them I didn’t before.” ID explained. They closed their eyes with a shrug. “Doesn’t work on animals, so Nezu and I are friends.” Opening their eyes again, ID looked Izuku over. “Midoriya Izuku…” the words felt like a weight on his shoulders as their eyes glowed white. They blinked and hummed. “That’s interesting….”

 “Stop messing with him!” Statstica said, smacking their shoulder.

 “Bad sidekick.”

 “You raised me for the past ten years. I ain’t scared of you!” Statstica sniffed. She turned to Izuku. “So we’re going to be leaving on Friday morning, so you know, with the agency plane. ID knows where your guardians live.”

 “Oh, right! Aizawa-Sensei said you went to school together.” Izuku nodded.

 “Yep. You’ll find that while most high school classes do end up drifting apart, it’s rarer for a hero class to do so.” ID remarked. “We bond deeper. I may not be too close with everyone, but we keep in touch.” They shrugged. “Plus, I dated Done for a few weeks before he figured out he was fully gay.” Izuku blinked at ID, who bulldozed on. “So we’re close along with BDSM. And I dated Sonic Man to…. Huh, did I date everyone but the Banana in that friend group…” ID stared at the wall as Nezu chuckled, stirring his tea.

 “I believe you did,” he remarked.

 “Eh.” ID shrugged. “Anyway, so we all bonded. So… we got off track. Right. You’ll be coming with us on Friday to Otheon, where I’ll be investigating some stuff. Kiddo here,” a pat on Statistica’s shoulder indicated whom they spoke about. “Will be doing physical training mostly with you. I’ll also be sparring with you, and we’ll sic you on Sonic Man’s brother to spar ten to one. I think… no, wait, Skeleton Muscles said he’d also talk to his old homeroom teacher. I spoke with my bosses, and they’re fine with another pair of hands given the cases he used to work.”

 “…” Izuku turned to the only woman in the room helplessly.

 “They mean that I’ll spar with you, and you’ll end up sparring with Inegnenium’s brother and then. Plus, All Might’s old teacher is probably coming. The Court doesn’t mind him along due to his own history of investigation.” Statistica chirped.

 “...Skeleton Muscles?” Izuku asked.

 “It’s impossible to keep a secret from me,” ID sniffed, sticking their nose in the air. “I know everything.”

 “No, you don’t. They like to claim it, but they’re lying. No one is omnipotent… well, Nezu comes close.” joked Statistica. “But yeah. I think they say random names when bored.”

 “Free entertainment,” ID shrugged. Izuku snickered, a little amused at least.

 “So why have me come to the office?” Izuku asked.

 “To update you. I’m busy the next few days helping track Stain,” ID explained. “Issue is my Quirk is random enough that it’s hard to track him with it, and he moves around quickly.”

 “But Otheon is more important?” Izuku asked.

 “A possible global terrorist organization is always more important than some serial killer,” ID said honestly. Izuku’s mouth dropped open. “I know, kid, I know. It’s essential and honestly personal for me to go at this.” ID shrugged. “I wanted to meet you and say your name to confirm you’re good before Friday.”

 The door to the office opened suddenly, startling the group. Aizawa stepped in, Eri following him happily.

 “Sup, Done!” ID said, sounding amused.

 “Shut up, ID,” Aizawa said grumpily. “I’m here to ensure my ward is okay with you.”

 “He’ll be fine. Casanova will have fun with us… Nah, that’s not a good one. Ah, Bait.” ID nodded.

 “Bait?” Izuku asked, realizing what they were saying.

 “It fits,” ID said. “Put you in a room, and your lovers will go crazy.” Izuku went red as Eri giggled.

 “Hi, I’m Eri.” the little girl said softly, waving at ID, who blinked.

 “Oh my god, she’s so cute!” Statistica said in a squeal.

 “...Hi, kid,” ID said. Eri blinked, a pout forming.

 “No! You call me… oh, it hasn’t happened.” Eri hummed. ID paused, tilting their head to the side.

 “...Eri…” they said. Their eyes didn’t change. “...Aizawa Eri.” their eyes flashed then. They outright jerked their head back, eyes wide in shock. “Oh wow.”

 “Wow, what?” Aizawa asked, glaring at the other hero.

 “She’s got a temporal Quirk, right?” ID asked. Aizawa crossed his arms, waiting. Izuku looked at ID curiously. “Look, Bait here got hit by Cupid, whose Quirk is also temporal based. We saw the Unicorn in the future, meaning that the Quirk briefly touched her. It forced a bit of a Quirk evolution.”

 “You got that just by saying her name?” Izuku asked in awe, going for his notebook to write it down. ID glanced at them and sighed.

 “I’ll teach you coding later. But anyway, yes. It’s one of the bigger things I didn’t know about her before, so I got a dose of info about her Quirk and the knowledge it evolved recently. The rest I already know. I research everything before using my Quirk. Easier to narrow the margins. Unicorn here; I did get a dossier on. But temporal Quirks are rare enough that they get studied to hell and back. Superstrength is such a common thing that it’s not worth studying. So we know that temporal Quirks can react to one another in strange ways. Clock Eyes… Sir Nighteye reported a temporary increase in Quirk power after going against a villain who could see the future when they ate some sort of food. He could use his Quirk three times a day for two months.” ID said. Izuku wrote it all down, bouncing.

 “I read about that. Wow, I didn’t think Matchmaker was temporal, but you’re right! It sees the future and shows us glimpses! So when Eri was shown, it attached to her?” Izuku asked. “What is happening now?”

 “Well, apparently, she might know something from the future or at least can feel a timeline out.” ID said. “My Quirk said so… Aizawa Eri… oh wow, that’s cool.”

 “Oh?” Nezu asked, leaning forward.

 “She could already do it and knew she could, but it never stayed. Right Unicorn?”

 “Uhuh,” Eri nodded. She hummed. “Will it stay? It kinda hurts….” Aizawa placed a hand on her head, frowning.

 “Dunno. It’s possible the Quirk just woke up the paths in your brain so you can remember. Maybe you’ll go back to random bursts of information. Maybe you’ll end up only remembering each day. Temporal Quirks are weird.” ID said.

 “Wouldn’t it make more sense if she could know something from the past rather than the future?” asked Izuku.

 “Not necessarily.” Nezu voiced. “Time isn’t linear. As a great doctor once said: it’s more wibbly and wobbly than that. As well it’s a social concept. Eri may only be able to remove the years from something, but may be able to see parts of the future, experiencing it as memories.”

 “... most of the class feel more protective of her than we should theoretically,” Izuku said. Eri winced, looking down upon hearing that. “Ah! Nothing bad about that!”

 “My Quirk makes you,” Eri muttered.

 “Nah, it’s just giving us the emotions we’d feel in the future,” Statistica said. “If I understand what the Quirk nuts are saying…” she looked between the group. Aizawa looked exhausted. He had already been dealing with Izuku and the many crushes on him. Adding a possible future seeing child who could rewind time did not make things easy for him, more so when she knew things about the future.

 He made a mental note to stalk up on headache medication in the future.

-0-

  “So… we have an omnipotent daughter now,” Yamada said as he glanced at Eri. They were back at the apartment, Yamada finishing some paperwork for his acceptance of Kaminari as an intern. According to Yamada, one of his sidekicks’ Quirks could let him direct electricity from an external source. The internship made sense with the reveal of Kaminari gathering electricity instead of producing it.

 “A somewhat Omnipotent daughter,” Aizawa groaned from where he was going through some paperwork himself. He wouldn’t tell Izuku what it was. “It might not last.”

 Eri shrugged at the looks she got, busy colouring at the coffee table where Izuku sat, working on some homework. “I dunno,” the little girl said calmly. “I know it makes me less nervous cause I remember being ten and tackling Dekiru and his wife during a game, but I know it hasn’t happened yet.”

 “Which wife is that?” Yamada joked.

 “Uravity,” Eri said, making Izuku groan. “Huh? Did I do something wrong?”

 “Just embarrassed, Eri,” Izuku muttered. Eri reached out to pat his head. Izuku sighed. “Thank you.”

 “Welcome, Dekiru!” Eri said happily. She went back to colouring. Izuku returned to his homework, finishing his math before pulling out his phone, which had been vibrating for a while.

Class 1-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Pichu: Okay if I’m gonna be the next Present Mic, Aoyama is gonna be the next Midnight… who is the next Aizawa?

Bass Boost: That Shinsou kid probably. Has the same vibe in the other chat.

Alien Queen: Hell yeah!

Office Supplies: I can see it. Also, should we have a chat with Midoriya in it and all of his potential spouses?

Dr. Dolittle: Adding them here?

YaoMomo: This is the class chat. I doubt sensei would be happy to add them here.

Rock HARD: plus like Bakugou and Mineta are in the chat.

Bass Boost: Mineta got removed like this afternoon and Bakugou has never, ever BEEN in this chat. Do they count?

Class Prez: I am willing to be in another chat with everyone.

Pichu: lol sorry but imagine like somehow Shigaraki managing to get into the chat

Alien Queen: that’s terrifying. Man might be able to go vigilante but right now he’s a villain o.0

Out of the Kitchen: I vote no. Unless the man goes through his redemption arch fast.

Frog: Would any of us actually be willing to be around him though? Redemption or not he tried to murder us.

Pichu: Ehhh… Grey area? Man apparently got manipulated by his overlord and can snap out of it.

Rock HARD: Forgiveness is MANLY.

Frog: even if forgiving people is good I don’t know if I can. Not unless he proves he changed you know? Like if he never attacks us ever again with intent to kill I mean.

Edgy Bird: If he truly wishes to change in the future and has shown he is willing to offer it then I would be willing to accept him as friend and not foe.

However if he perchance claims to change but goes right back to his normal behaviour then it is not change that drives him. Not out of habit but out of a true disregard for wishing to change.

Pichu: It probably is different for Tsu given she nearly got killed by him to.

Frog: True.

Gravity Queen: I just realized that we’re discussing an actual villain and not just some rando. And it’s getting heavy. So I vote we do make a chat for all of Midoriya’s potential lovers. If he’s okay with it.

Izuku blinked at the chat, surprised by the direction it took before texting back.

Small Might: I have no idea how to react to that. I mean… I guess it would be nice to talk to them. I didn’t see Shinsou or Monoma or Hatsume or anyone all day. We’re all so busy.

Small Might: though I only ask NO ONE FLIRT in the chat. I’m not near ready for that 😖

Pichu: No problem! I think Sensei would murk us if we did even if you’re terribly cute and we love your blush ❤️

Sensei: Extra classes seem to be just giving themselves out.

Pichu: Ha. I’m in danger.

Sensei: Make the chat but put an adult (not me) in it. So if anyone does make Midoriya uncomfortable we can know.

 “Thanks, Aizawa,” Izuku said, glancing up at the man who snorted.

 “The rat probably monitors the other chat. But I’d prefer an adult in this one,” he said.

 “Chat?” Yamada asked.

 “The hellions want to make a chat with Midoriya and everyone else he could end up with,” Aizawa explained as Izuku’s phone chimed with the announcement that he’d been added to a new chat called…

 “Midoriya’s Harem and Adult Supervision?!?” Izuku squeaked. The adults looked at him before they began laughing.

 It was pretty funny.

-0-

 He felt tired. So tired as he sat there in the room with the TV playing. The bodies of the previous owners of the apartment were king gone, destroyed so they couldn’t smell. After fleeing the doctor, he’d been trying to figure out how to continue his plans. Shigaraki no longer seemed reasonable to follow with the future, showing how he could abandon the goal of All for One.

 He needed to find a new Quirk. One that could help him survive. A healing Quirk would work, one he could use himself. Recovery Girl was out. He had heard of a young boy on Nabu discussed in the doctor’s labs…

 “Breaking news: Dr. Anders, former hero and skilled surgeon, has declared he will be staying in Japan for the next few months as part of a task force being created by All Might to deal with the villain who injured him,” the broadcaster said. “His Quirk, Spirit Healer, enables him to heal any wound while preventing things such as cell degeneration which has led to wonders in curing….”

 He lifted his head, watching the news. He felt a smile cross his face.

 It seemed as if fate had delivered his salvation.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Notes:

-MERRY CHRISTMAS!! Hope you guys like this double update!

-Hope you guys liked it! This 100% was because I wanted to introduce everyone, lol.

-Eri’s power will degrade as time goes on. She’s still going to be able to say random things that are a little weird. But yeah… look, this was fun to think of, and also I love Eri. But the cute little girl whose so shy and timid gets boring compared to a mildly Eldritch being.

-Group chat was 100% me setting shit up.

-As an aside: Bakugou would never talk in group chats, and you can’t convince me otherwise.

-Look… I don’t know if I CAN add Shigaraki without it being weird. Sorry.

-I wonder who is talking…

#bnha #bnha au #videos of the future #photos and videos #boku no hero academia #izuku midoriya #aizawa shouta #yamada hizashi #eri #oc: info dropper

[jun-hyungs]

my brain has been infected so i’m making a list of headcanons for the neo twewy au before i forget

ranjiro/aiger

the lyrics from the post are from we’re losing you

ranjiro had a bad relationship with his family so he ran away from home

he bought a reaper pin because he thought it looked cool, pulling him into the game

however, he didn’t really like the idea of returning to his old life over the course of the game so he decided to join the reapers

aiger died, and going by the rules of the og game, his entrance fee was naru

with aiger being aiger, working in teams wasn’t really his style and when it became evident he wasn’t going to be able to win the game, he turned to the reapers instead in hopes of at least saving naru

ranjiro and aiger were paired together as work partners, though they hated each other at first because aiger didn’t like being a reaper and kept trying to sabotage ranjiro

as ranjiro learned more about aiger, he started regretting how he felt towards his family and they ended up bonding over the fact that they both wished they were better siblings

ranjiro started covering for aiger a lot more when he didn’t want to follow orders, and from there they started developing feelings for each other and eventually started dating

they might’ve started planning to escape the reapers, but the higher ups who have been keeping tabs on aiger saw his potential to become a powerful reaper in the form of something similar to his resonance, so they put him under intense training where aiger essentially had to fight for his life until he could harness the noise’s power as his own without the use of pins and developed an even stronger form like the previous gms

ranjiro wasn’t able to do anything to stop them or else he’d be risking his own life, but he was always there to take care of aiger afterwards

being molded into the reapers’ weapon, aiger suffered a lot of trauma and became despondent, only really talking to ranjiro who is the only one who can get him under control after he transforms, though sometimes he gets hurt in the process

aiger also started to forget about naru the more he became a monster. ranjiro is the one who reminds him based on what aiger told him about her

they still go on dates in their free time, and ranjiro often buys aiger new clothes because he likes to spoil him. aiger likes anything that ranjiro picks

aiger clings to ranjiro who is his only pillar of support, and anyone who tries to hurt ranjiro has to answer to him. the reapers use this to their advantage when they want to get aiger to follow orders

right now ranjiro is trying to find a way to get the both of them away from the reapers and hopefully turn aiger back to how he was before

ranjiro’s fav restaurants: justice burger, spicy curry don, suzu slurpz

aiger’s fav restaurants: sby bbq, donburi town

rantaro/valt

theme: world is yours

both rantaro and valt are avid tin pin players, and while they might’ve seen each other in the rg before, they didn’t really meet until they both entered the game

after losing contact with ranjiro, rantaro started looking for him, though it wasn’t until much later that he found a reaper pin as his only lead

being a pin collector, it was inevitable that valt would get his hands on a reaper pin as well

they agreed to team up as soon as they met each other in the game and quickly bonded over tin pin

they came up with their team name ‘shibuya slammers’ together

valt is a huge fan of hog fang

valt bought rantaro his chain necklace, and rantaro bought them matching hog fang shoes

everyone knows that they’re practically dating except for them

rantaro has yet to meet ranjiro again, but it won’t be pretty when he does

rantaro told valt about his search for ranjiro, and valt wants to help because he sympathizes with him

rantaro’s fav restaurants: justice burger, sby bbq, tacos y mas tacos

valt’s fav restaurants: justice burger, asia fantasia

ranzo/bel

the lyrics from the post are from chase

during a trip to japan, ranzo bought a reaper pin thinking it would make a good souvenir

he follows rantaro on social media and got into tin pin because of him, though there’s not as big of a tin pin crowd in brazil than in japan

ranzo is a one-person team. when he tried to join other teams, they each found themselves getting targeted by more noise than the others, so they all kicked ranzo out thinking he was bad luck

bel doesn’t have any family left in this au. he didn’t have a good relationship with his extended family nor the staff he had employed

he bought a reaper pin because it has his ‘aesthetic.’ he quickly mastered using pins, but didn’t work well on a team, so when the reapers offered to recruit him he jumped at the opportunity

bel is extremely talented at manipulating the noise, but no one takes him seriously because he’s still just a kid. as a result, he doesn’t really get along with the other reapers

bel was the first person ranzo met in the game, so he didn’t know bel was technically his enemy and tried to make friends with him. even after bel explained the rules of the game and chased him away with noise, ranzo never stopped treating him as a friend

at first bel just thought ranzo was annoying and kept targeting him during missions, but ranzo was always friendly with him and actually saw him as an equal, so bel developed a soft spot for him

eventually, bel started getting jealous of anyone who tried getting too close to ranzo so he would target them instead. he felt guilty that ranzo kept getting kicked out of different teams because of him, so he also started secretly helping ranzo during missions, with the exception of scramble slams where it would be impossible for him to be discreet about it

when bel isn’t busy harassing ranzo, he sometimes complains to him about his job, and one time ranzo asked him if he’d want to quit and go back to the rg with him if ranzo won the game. bel never gave him an answer, but he’s still highly considering it

bel wants to ask ranzo to be a reaper with him because he doesn’t want to go back to his old life, but he also knows that ranzo still wants to return to the rg

both ranzo and bel like to shop at tigre punks

ranzo’s fav restaurants: asia fantasia, tacos y mas tacos, crowned curry

bel’s fav restaurants: udagawa parfait, fluffy n sweet, cutie pies

#text by hyung #i'll be updating this over time!

[lionheartslowstart]

Busy Bee

Feeling stagnant drives me crazy and stresses me out beyond belief. It makes my skin crawl. I hate feeling like I’m not accomplishing anything, like I’m not moving forward. Unfortunately, there tend to be pockets in my life when this exact thing happens. Whether it’s due to specific circumstances outside my control, or even just due to being disabled, there are periods of time where I’m just not able to accomplish anything. And it would appear I am currently sitting in one of those pockets.

Don’t get me wrong, in this case, it’s for wonderful, happy reasons. In a few weeks, my parents are taking me to Paris. I’ve never been and always wanted to go. Recently, my parents explained to me that it’s actually a graduation gift, which confused me because I graduated seven years ago…but this trip was eventually planned for May of 2020 (which obviously didn’t happen), only two years after I graduated, so I suppose it makes sense. I’m so excited to go. A week with my parents in one of the most beautiful cities in the world!

And then, as soon as we get back, “Thomas” and I are going to start the process for adopting kittens! We decided to get two because kittens tend to do better together, especially when they’re already bonded. Yes, we’re a little concerned about my allergies, especially with no balcony, but I’ve been doing really well with the shots (two years now), and we can always open all the windows if I need some fresh air. Plus, we plan on harness and backpack training the cats as soon as possible, so they won’t be indoors 24/7, AND we have a Roomba (her name is Millie) that we can run once a week to keep up with all the fur and dander. So we’re really really hoping my allergies don’t make pet ownership a struggle. (And even if it is, I’ll just have to tough it out for 15 years because there is no way we would just give the cats back! That would be cruel.)

Cats tend to have a difficult time adjusting to new spaces. So even though we’ll have bonded kittens who will have each other for comfort, I’m sure they’ll be scared and it will take them time to adjust. And not just to the space either. They’ll also need time to adjust to us as owners. Since Thomas is at work all week, that means I’ll have to be the one to stay home and look after them. It would be wrong to throw these kittens into a new territory and then leave them completely alone. So I intend on taking two to three weeks (the recommended time) to let them get to know me and help our little kitties build a schedule with food and play. I have accepted that those few weeks will be a full time commitment on my part. (And of course, Thomas will help out on the weekends when he’s home, though it unfortunately may mean the cats will take longer to feel safe with him.)

With the France trip coming up, and then the immediate commitment to homing new kittens, this is clearly not the time for me to be making big life movements. That mainly includes submitting auditions for film and television, as well as finding a part time job. I’ve been wanting to work part time for a while, even though it’s really scary and I’m afraid I won’t be able to maintain that kind of stamina long-term. But I have to try. I miss having a schedule, and historically, working a small job has increased my energy in other areas of my life. (This according to my therapist of eight years.)

Still, not having anything to do career-wise has me on shpilkes. So at the very least, I’m trying to keep myself busy and fill my time with activities that feed my soul in the meantime.

I have recently resumed my foreign language courses, which currently include Spanish, French, and Yiddish. Plus, thanks to my mother getting me into K-Dramas, I plan on adding Korean! (Though that probably won't happen until after I return from France, since obviously French is the current priority.) I've always loved learning languages, and they always seemed to come pretty easy to me, most likely due to strong pattern recognition thanks to autism. However, my understanding is that Korean has a completely different syntax from the other languages I've learned, so I'm excited to really challenge myself. 

In addition to spoken languages, I’ll be starting ASL lessons soon, too! I'm SO excited. I've always wanted to learn ASL, and I'll be learning from a close friend of my mother's, who is just the kindest woman ever.

Furthermore, after three years of dealing with shame and fear, I've finally started taking motorcycle lessons again! I'm doing really, really well, if I do say so myself.

And of course, I’ve signed up for more classes at my pole studio now that I’ve moved back to the area. (Hallelujah.) Unfortunately, I did have to take a mini-hiatus from both pole and motorcycle lessons since during my last lesson I dumped the bike and it fell on my foot…and then I was sick…but I'm back, baby! I've already booked my next dance class, and I'll hopefully be booking my next motorcycle class soon too (my foot has not totally recovered and truthfully I probably should wait longer to go back to pole BUT I miss it way too much).

On top of all of that, I've resumed making spell jars, and have begun to expand into other practices as well.

All in all, it's been a busy few weeks!

I’m realizing I tend to get bogged down by what I’m NOT accomplishing, instead of what I AM accomplishing. Especially when what I’m NOT accomplishing has to do with career goals. I have an obsession with working, or perhaps more accurately, being able to work, as if that’s the most important thing in a person’s life. I know it’s not, that there are so many more important things, but there’s a lot pressure in our society to hold a job, as well as the pervasive idea that your ability to engage in labor is somehow tied to your worth. It’s an incredibly ableist (not to mention capitalist) ideal, and I’m working hard to unlearn it. Like I said, I’m doing my best to fill my time with the hobbies I enjoy, and what’s more, allow myself to enjoy them without feeling guilty. I have to keep reminding myself that just because I’m not working, doesn’t mean I’m not busy!

#personal #growth #disabled #disability #internalized ableism #ableism

[angst-king]

Sharpie tattoos

(mention of physical abuse, suicidal idology) What was I thinking? Was this really necessary? Did I make the right decision? The thoughts are racing through my mind as the ambulance gets closer to the destination. Why am I in an ambulance, well my father had gotten caught. He got mad over an assignment I didn’t get the best grade on and I wasn’t doing as well during his training sessions as he would’ve liked me too. So he beat me bad enough for my sister to sneak me out of the house and take me to a hospital where i told them everything. 

They gave me a mental evaluation and said that it would be too dangerous for me to go home. Not only would Endeavor possibly want to hurt me more for seeking help but, my mental state is apparently bad. I didn’t think of killing myself too often, sure the thoughts slipped into my mind every so often but, I never commit to it or thought to do anything.

The only reason I agreed to go was that I wanted away from my father. The only thing is, it's a long-term facility, not a short-term one. They want to give my siblings a chance to get out of my father’s house and be stable enough to support me so I can get further help.

I just wanted to stay away from my father.

When I arrive they wheel me inside the place and immediately I’m a little surprised at how well kept this place was. There were only a few scribbles of crayon on the walls, but the floors were shiny the room didn’t smell of cleaning solution, nor was the air stale. The chairs were all lined up in two rows, one against two walls.

I’m being wheeled up the the in-take desk where the paramedic hands them the paper work, my bag, and helps me out of the transport chair. There are three ladies, one takes my bag while the other two have me follow them after a short introduction.

“Hello Todoroki, my name is nurse Yugi, and this nurse Oikawa, please follow us into the exam room.” I nodded quietly and followed the two ladies down the hall wondering what the other nurse would do with my bag. 

We go down the hall and to the left before we’re in a doctor’s exam room. Nurse Yugi helps me onto the exam bed and tells me they’ll be checking my vitals and body condition. I nod and both women start the exam, Ms Yugi being the main one preforming it while nurse OIkawa was assisting. 

They do everything of a normal doctor’s exam would though when nurse Yugi put the stethoscope on my ribs to hear me breath I winced. My ribs are still painful from Endeavor’s beating. She apologizes and asks if it hurt. 

“Y-yeah, i’m pretty sure they’re still healing.” I informed her, though she looked confused but Ms Oikawa seemed to have gotten it after looking at the paper again. She eyes me from behind the paper for a second, its not a judgmental eye, more so concerned.

“He broke your ribs in two places each side, so his oxygen saturation and breathing will be different.” She states in a matter of fact way. Yugi sighs and then asks me.

“Do you have any other injuries, hun?” “y-yeah” I push my hair and show her the stitching on left side of my head, left ankle, left collar bone and bruises on my thighs. It was a lot worse when i was admitted to the normal hospital but they got somethings fixed up more quickly than others. 

I was only in a gown so that made it easy to show the ladies without having to strip my clothes off. Both of them didn’t seem to appalled but i could feel their worry. 

“Okay we’ll inform the doctor and he will either see you tonight or tomorrow morning.” Then nurse Yugi asks Oikawa to get me some clothes. Oikawa leaves the room but doesn’t take long to come back. They tell me that they can’t leave me to change due to it being a safety risk but they do have a curtain in the room. So they pull the curtain to separate us and give me privacy for me to change into the clothes provided for me.

They gave me a set of grey scrubs to wear. I take off my gown leaving me only in my boxers and bandages. Exposing my bareskin to the chilled air of the exam room. I shudder harshly before quickly putting on the the uniform. Once i was dressed, I come out from behind the curtain and nurses tell me its time to take me to my room.

“Alright Todoroki, lets get you to your room”  I adjusted the shirt and follows the women out of the exam room. My bare feet padded down the hallways to an elevator. Most of the main floor was just exam rooms and a cafeteria and a lounge area. I don’t know what floor i’m on so i’m following them blindly. 

We go down an hallway with orange walls with white pokadots I don’t even bother looking at the room numbers until we get to my room, 309. The Yugi nocks on the door first and pokes her head in. I hear her say. 

“You have a roommate” Then I’m let into the room, its pretty nice actually. It kinda looks like a college dorm but no bunk bed and suicide proof. There are even large cubbies to place clothes, the door to the bathroom hae a slanted gap at the top. The window have blinds with a stick no curtain, the beds didn’t have a head board, but they had a night stand between the beds that had phone chargers. 

“When your bags are given back to you, you can place your clothes in the cubbies and get set up before dinner.” Nurse OIkawa informs me, I nodded and then noticed a blond boy sitting on the bed. His hair was a dirty mess with sharp tangles and his eyes darted towards me. He gave me a large toothy smile while i gave him a small wave. 

“Todoroki Shouto this is Kaminari Denki”

#todokami #my psych academia

[restforthe-burdenedsoul]

august 4

I initially woke up with really good intentions for the day. Today was gonna be a better day (and it still has that potential since it’s only 9).

I overslept and had nightmare after nightmare about the dog peeing on the carpet or escaping her crate and peeing on the carpet (can you tell this stresses me out?)

I finally pull myself outta bed and clock in but I still have to take the dog outside. But it’s trash day. So she comes out of her crate and immediately runs under my desk so I have to drag her out to put her harness on. She’s literally shivering from fear and won’t cooperate. I finally get it on and she won’t move. She’s only 15 pounds so it’s not like I can’t physically move her but she’s fucking traumatized and then I feel like a monster trying to move her small shaking and panting body.

Then I get this total overwhelm feeling because I’m so.tired. of dealing with her day in and day out. I’m so tired of being stuck in my house all the time with this dog who is afraid of everything and makes going outside with her so hard. I’m so tired of being alone in this house and having to handle her on my own.

I took her out last evening, M was already home and showering and was gonna take her out but she was sitting at the door (her non verbal sign for “I have to pee RIGHT now take me out or I will pee on your carpet this is an emergency) so I take her out. She literally gives no other signal and that is the last train to outside potty.

The neighbor dogs come out ( a golden and some kind of medium fluffy white dog) I didn’t notice. Next thing I know the leash is giving me leash burn. I always have a tight grip on the end of it so she didn’t go far, but was FULL ON CHARGING at these dogs.

And I can’t do it anymore. And we can’t afford training right now. But I can’t do this on my own.

M is only home from like 9pm and we go to bed at 11 so he can’t really do much. It’s dark outside. And she is perfectly fine inside with the exception of peeing when we miss her silent potty alarm. Which I admit is happening more often because I’m so overwhelmed with the thought of taking her outside every 4 hours.

Work didn’t approve M’s requested schedule for the quarterly schedule change. He requested Monday-Friday 8-5 so he can actually be home with me now, but they put him Wednesday-Thursday 8-5, Friday 10-7, Saturday 8-5, Sunday 8-5. So now we can’t go to church together and he works the weekends when I am off. His mom is off weekends, so he’ll still have to be at their house to take care of his grandmom on mondays and Tuesdays, so I still won’t really see him.

And I still have no fucking friends in the area and he’s the only person I get to do stuff with now. I have one other friend in Florida and she won’t drive to me because I’m 2 hours away. I admittedly stopped making the effort because I got tired of being the only one making the trip. My other friend moved to NY and my other one just disappeared after the ex came back.

I wanted today to be a better day but it’s 9am and I’m already sobbing on my couch because I am tired of this. Im tired of feeling so lonely.

—-

One more week until the summer is over and I will at least be at schools 3 days a week. And I hope that helps. It’s still really only talking to children but it’s better than talking to the dog all day. Who spends most of her day hiding under the bed anyway.

—-

M said he was open to moving, and that his mom would probably follow, I know my parents wouldn’t but we barely talk now anyway and they want literally nothing to do with M.

The idea of moving back to Jersey is floating around in my head. I wanna be by my friends again. Because I know we always make time for each other. Even if we’re too busy, we just go grocery shopping together or whatever mundane task you have to do. Because it’s important to us to see each other often. And then I’d only be a weekend trip away from my best friend again. We saw each other every other month and alternated who drove to who. So yah, I can’t get a friend here to drive two hours to me but my best friend and I coordinated 8 hour drives to each other 6 times a year. So. I just don’t believe the excuses here.

[aubstacle-of-course]

Took my kitten for a walk in the park and all the dog ppl were Judging me

#we’re still working on harness training her #this was only the second time she’s been out #she’s very comfortable in the back yard #but as soon as I take her to the park she screams and just wants to be held #also this time her brother couldn’t be with her so I think it was a lil extra scary #cuz he’s a good boy but he’s a on the large side of medium dog and he pulls a bit sometimes #so it would have been too much to keep track of both of them at once