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jjba-smash-or-pass · 2 months

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Who are your top 5 favorite JoJo characters and why? Who are your least favorite characters?

Alright I'm gonna go into more detail because I love talking about characters <3

1: Foo Fighters. Like I've said before, Kakyoin and them have some similar motifs, namely the motifs of feeling othered from the world and not really having friends until they become a part of the main Jojo group of their respective parts. As a (probably) autistic person and a (definitely) ADHD person, I heavily relate to this message, as I never really feel like I belong unless I'm with my tight-knit friend group. What I like better about FF, though, is that this "otherness" is a key aspect of their personality and characterization, instead of being shoehorned in right before their screen time ends. That, and their overall personality is just more fun. Also nonbinary representation is always cool in my book.

2: Josuke Higashikata. He's the manifestation of my favorite things about Jojo all put into one character. He's got a snazzy outfit. He can switch from silly to serious at a moment's notice. But most importantly, he has a heart of gold and won't stop fighting for peace. The fact that he's a former fictional crush of mine definitely kicks him up a few places as well.

3: Yoshikage Kira. I know I said Josuke includes all of my favorite things about Jojo, but Kira is a manifestation of all the minor things I love about Jojo. He "looks normal" in canon but wears a Bright Purple Outfit. He has really unique dialogue. He's insanely smart. And, of course, he's a needlessly cruel villain. Araki seems to love creating villains that like to kick puppies for fun, and I love seeing them in his work. The funniest part is that Kira would actually just be a normal guy, if not for his urge to kill women. There's a lot of other things about his character I like, but none major enough to mention here.

4: Jolyne Cujoh. I really appreciated seeing her character growth throughout the story of Stone Ocean! Jolyne, like Josuke, has a lot of that fighting spirit and willpower, but instead of fighting for the sake of others (although she definitely does that don't get me wrong), her story is about fighting for the sake of herself. She's been through a lot. She grew up without a father figure. And now, she's stuck in prison for a crime she didn't commit. Her story is about fighting for her own future, fighting to make amends with her father, fighting to free herself and her soul. And in the end, it was her decisions that ended up defeating Pucci.

5: Danny. The bestest boy. Little ouppy. He deserved better.

okay but really my number 5 pick is Iggy. He's a dog who gives absolutely zero shits about humans unless they're giving him coffee gum. But underneath that shittiness is a tenacity that's almost human-like. He reminds me of my own dog, in a way. She's a grumpy old lady who doesn't listen to a word you say unless there's food involved, and she refuses to die. Seriously, she's gotten her little paws on SO much chocolate during her lifespan, and she's had to take a medicine that was supposed to give her leukemia years ago.

And for the sake of not making this any longer than it needs to be, I'll just list my least favorite character from the main cast and then overall.

My least favorite Jojo character from the main cast is Giorno. I feel like there's a lot of missed potential with his character. This is a 15-year-old boy who has both Joestar and Brando blood. There was so much Araki could have done with Giorno that he didn't, and instead created a character with very little personality who was supposed to be the driving force of his part. I think he's part of the reason Golden Wind is one of the most forgettable parts to me.

My least favorite Jojo character overall is Forever the orangutan. His Stand fight could have been really interesting but instead we got a child's bare ass on screen because Forever was a creep. I actually watched the Jojo OVA from the 2000's, and they cut Anne's character out entirely but keep the Strength fight. Because Anne wasn't there they altered how some of the events went down and honestly? It was super cool. I liked it a lot more. And do keep in mind that I don't think Araki was trying to write this as a sexy thing. I do think he was trying to incorporate shock factor though so it's still not very redeemable.

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dapandapod · 2 months

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Bring a friend home

Hello there! I honestly don't remember what the exact prompt was, but @firefly-party insisted on Jaskel something something Ikea, and thus, here we are! It was one of those eves I'm convinced I'm hilarious, lets see if you agree xD Please enjoy this silly madness!

On Ao3 here

See, there is thinking outside the box, and there is thinking outside the box. Then there is IKEA. Ikea is the kingdom of DIY and flat boxes. There is nothing you can’t do with a poor man’s budget and imagination, just ask youtube.

Which is why Jaskier finds himself getting lost by the couch section, and then again by the kitchen tables, and then there were the pretty lights and the cool shoe racks. HIs favorite was hot pink, in case anyone was wondering.

Oddly enough, Jaskier’s goal is the kid’s section.

He knows they are supposed to be at the end of the lap, and learned the hard way that short cuts really is just short for really-fucking-lost-where-was-that-blasted-map.

All he needs is the huge roll of drawing paper, and he means the HUGE one. It is heavy as shit, and well, maybe he should have brought something to carry it with, but that was future Jaskier’s problem, and now present Jaskier is cursing past Jaskier for getting distracted by the funky looking bed set.

It will be fine, probably, if he can make it to the downstairs area there should be those heavy duty baskets.

Jaskier is contemplating if he should buy the low budget pens as well, wondering if his niece and their Infinity Art Project will be worthy tools, when something catches his eye. There, by the exit, there are giant plushy baskets.

See, Jaskier is not a big fan of plushies, not really. They lack the warmth and the weight a person would have, but they are also much, much less dramatic than a person, probably.

And there, between the orangutan and the giant panda, there it is.

It is blue and white, and has just the one row of teeth, which his niece would have plenty of words about if she was with him.

It is soft and it’s silly and it’s silly and it's perfect, and Jaskier possibly said that out loud because there is one of those yellow striped shirts with the blue print turning around, and it takes him a moment to look up from that unfairly well shaped chest and into the face of a giant.

Which he also might have said out loud, if the twitch of the giant’s lips is anything to go by.

“Hej,” The man greets, of course he does, as if Jaskier speaks Ikea. “Anything I can do for you today?”

His name tag says Eskel, and it takes a WILD amount of willpower to not blurt out ‘How about me?’ and instead just stand there gaping for a moment, clutching his huge roll of paper.

“Your shark only has one set of teeth,” Jaskier says after one heartbeat too long, Eskel’s eyebrows lifting with the corner of his mouth.

“Well, I hear teeth make them harder to cuddle, and frankly, I myself find too many teeth a bit concerning. Tried to bring it up with the design team, but turns out I’m not very good at swedish,” the giant says, and Jaskier is feeling weak.

Actually yes, the paper roll is getting too heavy to hold the way he is, so he shifts, considering whether to either put it on the floor or between his knees, because that clearly is the right way to hold a giant huge fucking paper roll.

“Bitemarks are hot though,” Jaskier says before he can shove his entire fist in his mouth, which also would have been an unfortunate thing to do in front of this man. “I’ll just-” Jaskier says, turning on his heels to flee, only to walk almost straight into one of the display shelves.

He is saved by a big hand on his shoulder, and then not saved when Jaskier proceeds to drop the monster of a paper roll an inch from his toes.

The thud of the paper landing on the concrete floor makes Jaskier just close his eyes and accept his doom, because there is no way paper nor floor survived that.

“Ah, let me get that for you,” Eskel says, and when Jaskier opens his eyes again, the giant yellow striped man is kneeling in front of him, picking up the paper roll like it weighs nothing to him. It probably doesn’t.

Jaskier is wondering if Eskel would be able to pick him up as easily, and firmly shuts that down.

“Where to? Do you have a basket or a shopping cart?” he asks, and Jaskier is an embarrassed, shamed, blushing puddle on the floor.

“Ah, I was just… going to get that and get to the registers.”

Eskel nods sagely, and nods towards the shark plushies.

“Go give them a squeeze. You just might find a cuddly friend to bring home,” he says, and Jaskier…cannot.

Either this man is as dense as a brick and doesn’t realize what that sounds like, or he does.

Either way, Jaskier does walk over to the shark cage, the iron bars of the plushie basket holding an unholy amount of soft and silly and perfect bodies with staring eyes and too few teeth. BLÅHAJ, he reads, completely unable to pronounce it, but bewitched anyway.

He squeeze one, as instructed, and then the next. But the way the first one is looking at him, as if betrayed, Jaskier can’t help but to pick it up and hold it as he squeezes the others.

It is very nice to hold it actually, and Jaskier realizes he is indeed leaving here with a shark, and he is mentally preparing himself for the berating his niece will get him when they are introduced.

Finnigan. That is his name now. And he knows he will be berated even more when the niece finds the pun in there.

Turning around, Jaskier is surprised to see the employee is still watching him, and still holding that huge, now slightly dented paper roll for their Infinity Art Project.

“You are a good salesman, I’ll give you that,” Jaskier says, wagging his finger at Eskel.

“I’ll help you down the stairs with this, your hands look rather busy,” the giant says good naturedly. “If you don’t have more to pick up from here, that is,” He adds, stopping himself halfway to the stairs.

Lovely, simply lovely, and the way the scar stretches when he smiles, Jaskier squeezes poor Finnigan very hard to his chest. Good thing he isn’t a squeak toy, or this would have been very awkward.

“No, I’m done, thank you. But I can take it myself.”

“It’s alright,” Eskel waves him off with one hand, WITH ONE HAND, SIR!

It is simply unfair how some people just are like that, it is almost insulting how one person can be this kind and handsome and strong at the same time.

It is probably illegal somewhere, and Eskel will be put in handsome-jail if he ever goes there. Fuck, Jaskier needs a coffee and to shut his brain the fuck up.

They walk together down the stairs, but then Eskel just follows him and refuses to let the giant huge fucking paper roll down. Jaskier explains the Infinite Art Project and Eskel makes a contribution with a handful of those hand sized miniature pencils from one of the dispensers and winks as he tucks them into Jaskier’s bag. Well fuck.

Their time is up when Jaskier actually arrives by the registers and is forced to choose which line is the shortest and which one will offer him more time with this hunk of a human.

“When can we expect the art exhibition to begin? Any chance one can get an invite, considering how I am contributing?” Eskel asks, and oh boy, yeah, that man probably knows what he is doing.

Jaskier feels himself giving a crooked smile and pretends to consider it.

“For the meager price of One Cinnamon Bun, I might even let you in on the process itself,” Jaskier dares, heart racing and hands sweating. Poor Finnigan, they haven’t even left the store yet, and he is already on cuddle duty.

“A man should know his worth,” Eskel agrees with a nod. “You got yourself a bargain. Though I will add in a chosen beverage to go with it, in about fifteen minutes when my shift is over?”

Oh dear lord, Jaskier is going to combust on the spot.

They part ways, allowing Jaskier to dump his stuff in his shabby little car and to run into the bathrooms and check out his hair, only to meet up again by the Bistro outside the register area.

If Jaskier felt weak from seeing this man in yellow and blue stripes, it has nothing on him compared to Eskel in civilian clothes.

Eskel is enlightened about the arts of a 7 year old, and Jaskier brings home two cuddly friends from Ikea that day.

#the witcher #jaskel #jaskier x eskel #look i am not the one choosing prompts #well ok i kinda am #but still #modern au #ikea shark #meet cute #jaskier has adhd #eskel is good at flirting #or is he?#dapanda writes

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volvolts · 3 months

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Update on me being terrified to finally meet Apoo! (I said I was scared of him bc he's based off of an orangutan and monkeys scare me lmao)

I met him and I absolutely love him, he is so so SO silly. His little tussle with Kizaru made me so happy to watch lol. He is just a little guy and I hope nothing terrible happens to him later on in the narrative /hj

I love this silly music man so much and I’m glad you do too!!! He’s a very funny bastard in the sabaody arc (and also same monkeys scare me too why do they look like they’ll rip you apart with bloodlust in their eyes???)

If you’ll allow me to ramble about him how he acts in pre timeskip and post timeskip makes him feel like two different people? At least to me lmao. But truth be told I hadn’t had time to rewatch pretimeskip stuff in a while. He’s a man of many contradictions and the only thing consistent about him is that he’s an asshole and he’s really strong. When we see him again in wano (and a bit in punk hazard) he a different kind of consistent? It’s kinda weird cuz he’s a snitch and a paranoid bitch but not a coward, he’s goofy looking but a genuine threat and always treated as such. I kinda love him though. He’s worse in wano but he’s my baby girl and has never done anything wrong ever and deserves the world

And I guess spoilers he does fare better some of the other characters but I also kinda hope he doesn’t play a big role again in the future cuz I feel like his luck will run out and I don’t think I would be ready for that ever 😭😭

#ask #one piece talk #scratchmen apoo

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starry-blue-echoes · 1 year

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Pen Pal AU:

Mista: If you were a monkey, what type would you be?

Narancia: Definitely not an orangutan.

Fugo: 1) Orangutans aren't monkeys, and 2) Why do you hate orangutans so much?

Narancia: I have bad experiences with orangutans.

RHFBHSBFHSBRGS

Narancia has a long standing loathing of orangutans and boats in general but it takes him ages before he explains why and it was....... quite the explanation (Fugo nearly popped a vein at how pissed off he got)

Narancia would definitely embellish Jotaro fighting off Forever tho. As much as he and Jotaro joke around, Narancia really looks up to him and sees him as The Strongest. He knows that all he had to do was say the word and Jotaro would come rescue him again like he did so many times on the way to Egypt

but maybe that's also why Narancia didn't ask Jotaro for help. He knows how tired he is, how much work he's done, how after the insanity of fighting Dio, the man wants nothing more than to rest. He doesn't want to burden him like that, so he opts to figure things out by himself

(I'll admit I wasn't expecting this crack and wholesomeness for such an angsty AU but then it hit me that prior to Part 5 going down, this AU is honestly probably pretty light hearted and silly)

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theuniversitychallengereview · 2 years

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UC 52.3 - LSE vs Univ, Oxford

It is raining and it took me forty five minutes to get back from Tesco after work and I have no idea how I usually start these. I’m trying to think about the opening paragraph from any of the hundreds of such posts I’ve made over the past five years, but I genuinely don’t have a clue. I know I don’t usually start by talking about the weather, or the duration of my commute, though I may well have done that at some point.

Surely it's really simple and I just talk about the teams, but I tried typing out ‘University College, Oxford are two-time winners of University Challenge’ and it felt far too formal for some reason. However, my mini-meltdown appears to have obfuscated that formality as far as I’m concerned, so I’ll press on from here and say that they were also beaten finalists on two occasions.

All four of these appearances in the Grand Final came with Bamber Gascoigne as host, making them the most successful team of that era. A bunch of other teams also won two trophies, but no one else came so close to winning a further two on top of that. Even more impressively, these four finals came from only five appearances.

The only blot on their record is that University College is an objectively silly name. No one is going around calling their higher education institution College University, so why are these jokers getting away with the opposite. And before you say, UCL is different. I don’t know why, it just is.

And speaking of initialised institutions, University College are up against LSE tonight, with their London rivals reaching the final in 1996. A semi final followed two years later, before a barren spell which has seen them make the quarter finals only once in the past twenty four years.

I was about to write a whole spiel about how this was remarkably poor form from one of the countries biggest Unis, but I thought I’d check exactly how big it was and found that it was in fact pretty tiny, ranking 89th on the list of largest enrollments. So its a good job I checked that, or I’d have made a right fool of myself.

Just above them on the list in 85th is Roehampton University, which has never been on the show, although it did feature on the recent University Challenge documentary, with a former contestant training up a prospective team. And delightfully, when I just searched this on Twitter, I found a tweet from one of the members of their team, confirming that they made it onto the show this year! I really hope that wasn’t revealed on the doc, because this feels sort of like a scoop, and its very rare I get to make scoops with this blog. So look out for Roehampton when they’re on at the end of November!

Anyway, that’s quite enough award-winning investigative journalism for one night - here’s your first starter for ten.

Off we go then, and the first thing to note is that LSE counterparts Ede and Balt are both wearing the same top, although Ede appears to have ripped the sleeves off of their one. Second thing to note is the presence of Wallop on the Univ team - we are well and truly off and running with both funky names and funky garb. An auspicious start.

Univ are the youngest team in the competition with an average age of 19, and their inexperience shows on the opening question as Hassan is able to snag ten points for LSE with Holmes and Watson. A bit before Univ’s time, that. Bless them. Two bonuses on tall structures followed for LSE, though they mixed up Lincoln and York cathedrals for the hat-trick.

Their lead doesn’t last for long though, and Wallop wallops Univ right into the game with a quick buzz. Bonuses on the use of ukuleles in movies follow, giving us a brilliant bit of phraseology from Paxman and the question setters - ‘woos a lady with his ukulele’. Both sides then miss a relatively easy starter on golf, before Cunanan hears the word orangutan and buzzes in instantly with Borneo.

No one gets the first picture starter either, though Hassan gives the same answer I did. TO be fair to us both, it kinda did look like a picture of the Black Sea. Cunanan gives Anne of Cleves to get the picture bonuses, and despite being told that all of the answers are gulfs they somehow contrived to give the Adriatic Sea as a guess. We’ve all been there.

The Oxonians have a thirty point lead at this stage, but Balt slices this up with Brighton Pavilion, pausing for exactly the same length of time as I did between the two words. We all associate the Green Party with Brighton, but it does just seem a bit silly for an entire constituency to be contained within a pavilion, doesn’t it? The bonuses have a question about a King Charles, but not the same one who has been in the news recently, and LSE are back within ten points.

However, this was the closest they would get for the rest of the game. Both sides missed a starter which mentioned tofu - Ede, who looks pretty vegan, buzzed in with a guess, but got the wrong salt - then Cunanan came in with his third starter of the night (and not to pat myself on the back too hard, but at this point in my notetaking I wrote ‘Cunanan is giving quiet Monkman vibes’. He would go on to take eight over the course of the match, so I think I can count myself as a pretty decent talent spotter. It's not quite a second scoop of the day, but it comes pretty close).

There is talk of a board game called Wingspan which sounds absolutely fantastic, but no one gets the question it relates to. Another for Cunanan brings up the music round, which is on trombone solos. I’m always a bit disinterested by the classical music questions, because I usually only get them by guessing, but I played the trombone for many years and recognised the Rimsky-Korsakov bonus like an old pro. Finally it comes into its own. I can only bemoan the lack of Guilmant’s Morceau Symphonique (a real deep cut, that, for all you bone fans out there).

A rare slip up from Cunanan offered LSE the chance to get back into the match, but they couldn’t capitalise and the Univ skipper was able to make up for his mistake on the very next starter. He’s delighted by the second picture round, which is on dinosaur skeletons, and has a little fist bump to himself before the pictures come up, but sadly it's an incredibly easy set (diplodocus, allosaurus and stegosaurus) so he isn’t able to showcase what I presume is immense expertise on the subject. Quick sidebar on the topic - my gf and I won a tub of hot chocolate mix from a pub quiz last Wednesday for drawing a gang of velociraptors at a concert. We may not have won the quiz, but by golly did we draw some weird looking velociraptors.

Some more points find their way to LSE courtesy of a rapid buzz from Ede on trigonometry, but like the ugly step-sisters trying to fit into Cinderella’s slipper after she’s already been discovered by the Prince, it's too little too late (I’m not sure if that actually happens at the end of Cinderella, but I’m too pleased with the simile to change it).

Final Score: LSE 110 - 175 University, Oxford

Had a lot more fun writing this one than the last two - I’ve even forgotten I was stuck in traffic for an age on the way home - so I hope you’ve enjoyed reading it. As ever, if you did, you can subscribe in a clicky-box somewhere on this website to ensure you’ll never miss an episode! If you’re reading this on Tumblr then the website I’m talking about is quizposting.com, and I’d be delighted to see you over there too. Thanks.

#university challenge #bbc2 #lse #university college oxford #jeremey paxman

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cephalomon · 6 months

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this is an extremely silly thing, but i get so irritated whenever ppl say stuff like "lol why r there regular birds in animal crossing when there are literal bird people" or "why does the game call this a cat pokemon if there arent any cats in pokemon"

i might be crazy but i feel like there r simple answers to these questions?

the animal crossing one feels like if aliens came to earth and asked us why we wear clothes but orangutans dont... like the birds in animal crossing r just a different type of bird... a type of bird that doesnt wear clothes or live in houses. shrimple.

and the pokemon question to me has always been like. cats are just a way of classifying these types of pokemon that share similar traits. theyre called cat pokemon. kind of like how all breeds of cats r still... cats. ykwim? hopefully that makes sense i might still be off my rocker

#and the same goes for like dog pokemon or horse pokemon #lizard pokemon describe that whole group its just like more common in the pkm world #to use the specific name since pokemon are so different from one another #idk i hope i make sense #i feel like it isnt that weird for ppl in the pokemon world to say cat or dog #to me its always just been that the word has a slightly different use in the pokemon world #percy chirps

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cosmicrhetoric · 3 years

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Im gonna read guards guards this month, what should i expect, honestly? This is my first discworld book

omg twins im rereading it right now....this is my first rereading in like eightish years so forgive me if I miss anything but basic rundown without giving too much away:

most discworld books are at least 50% satirical fantasy trope. in this book specifically that trope is "Unassuming Farm Boy/Secret Heir To The Throne Kills Dragon And Becomes King!!!!" and because this is a city watch book the other 50% is kinda a detective story. you follow around captain vimes and several others while they try to figure out who is trying to force this secret heir trope and why theres suddenly a massive supposed to be extinct dragon flying around. mostly the latter.

something to expect (and something these books do very well) is that the city it takes place in feels like a character in itself. like you are going to get to know ankh-morpork just as well as you get to know vimes....the whole place is silly and cartoonish but your sense of disbelief is suspended so quickly you literally forget that there's anything strange about idk an orangutan librarian at all while still finding him funny. the city WORKS.

at the same time, most watch books tackle very strong underlying questions of government and morality, class politics, who gets to make decisions and who ends up getting hurt by them. guards guards has a little less of this than the rest of the watch series but it's still there! so while this book is like.....stupid funny there's a real core of moral outrage that's really amazing to see in a book that features a guy called Carrot

you made a great choice though!! it wasn't mine but ive heard guards guards is supposed to be the ideal discworld book to start with.....have fun king feel free to mssg me ur thoughts i really like talking about discworld

#ty i really really like talking abt discworld #tried not to give much away but if you want to know specifics mssg me #discworld #guards guards #terry pratchett

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bonkrzfrfr · 1 year

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why are primates with long limbs so goofer. like i want to have that sillyness. examples of the sillys are orangutans, spider monkeys or siamang gibbons. a common trait amongst these primates is that they’re all omnivores with a heavy leaning towards herbivory, with all dabbling in small invertebrates. weird innit

#orangutan #spider monkey #primate

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imjustheretoseetheprivateblogs · 3 years

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Qrowin Week 2021: 6/22-Truth or Dare

That really was the craziest game of truth or dare ever.

Namely because the kids had coerced them into it

Of course, when Winter had picked “Dare” and Yang had told her to “chug a whole case of whiskey and a six pack of beers, Qrow had thought his fellow chaperone would have declared the night over.

Instead, he had to be the responsible one and tell the kids to behave themselves while he drove the stone drunk Winter home.

Who was staring at him from the passenger seat with big glassy eyes. It was starting to give him serial killer vibes, in all honesty.

“”What’s with the look?” he asked.

“Wanna play truth or dare,” Winter asked.

“I Pick truth.” Qrow said. Hopefully, he could dare her to fall asleep.

“Do you want to be my new daddy,” Winter said.

“What?”

Qrow’s surprise led him to nearly run into another late night driver.

“My old daddy is evil,” Winter said, blissfully unaware of the fact that they’s nearly smashed into the guardrail, “So I want you to be my new daddy.”

“Duly noted,” Qrow said, ignoring the sweaty images that came to mind and pulling up to the intercom of the Schnee manor front gates.

Rolling down the window, Qrow pressed the intercom button and hoped someone was still awake.

Sure enough, Klein’s voice filtered through the static.

“Yes?”

“It’s Qrow. I’m bringing Winter here for the night. She’s drunk.”

A pregnant pause on the intercom. Then.

“Why is Miss Winter drunk?”

“Truth or Dare,” Qrow answered simply.

“Dare!” Winter said. Qrow rolled his eyes.

“I dare you to go to sleep,” Qrow said. Winter scowled.

“And I dare you to carry me out!” she said.

Qrow gripped the steering wheel in annoyance.

“Klein, you have to let us in!”

The butler didn’t answer, but the gates swung open, allowing them entry. Qrow pulled his car in and parked by a large topiary of a dog.

Getting Winter out of the car was more than a chore than he cared for. As he was quickly realizing, a drunk Winter was a petulant Winter

“Is this our new house?” she slurred.

“No,” Qrow said, “it’s your house.”

“You’re silly,” she said “I don’t have a house. I have an apartment.”

“Well, I don’t know where your apartment is, so we’re spending the night here.”

Dear god, he’d just used “we’re” instead of “you’re”.

Qrow cursed as he tried and failed to turn the manor’s ornate front door’s knob with Winter in his arms.

“Hey Qrow. Truth or dare?”

“Truth.”

Winter scowled.

“You’re no fun!”

“I picked Truth! Ask your damn question!”

“Are we married?”

“No.”

“Then why you carrying me?”

“Because you’re drunk!”

It was at that moment, Klein opened the door.

Getting Winter up the stairs to the guest room was it’s own set of crazy. She wouldn’t stop acting like dead weight, she wouldn’t stop hanging from him like a spider monkey, and she wouldn’t. Stop. Hitting on him! It was getting weird!

Finally, they made it to guest room.

“Ok, time for bed,” he said, dropping Winter on the couch in the room. Or trying to, since she hung onto his neck with all the grace of an orangutan.

“Noooooo,” she said, “we’re married. I wanna sleep w’ you!”

She pulled him down and left a big sloppy kiss on Qrow’s cheek.

“We’re not married,” Qrow said, untangling her arms from around his neck.

Winter started to sniffle.

“Are you divorcing me?”

“He’ll come back to visit you tomorrow!” Klein said, bringing a blanket with rubber duck print and draping it over her. Winter pulled the blanet up to her chin so that only her eyes were visible. The jolly rubber duckies on it made her look more like a child than a grown woman.

“Promis?” she asked. She then hiccuped.

Qrow sighed. Might as well ride this out.

“I promise.” he said.

#My Writing #Qrowin #qrowinfest #qrowinweek #qrowin week 2021 #Qrowinweek2021 #Truth or Dare #qrowin week

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blookmallow · 3 years

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@midorilied suggested disney villains tiers based on how redeemable they are and i did not want to go hunting for all these pictures but couldnt find a good list of both disney and pixar villains so i had to do em separate

- sorry about the logo in the way thats facilier and bowler hat guy under there. we dont know hardly anything about facilier? i dont remember Why he was trying to sabotage naveen and all that but i feel like theres more going on there than we know about. also i dont remember what bowler hat guy was actually trying to do but i do remember the hat betrayed him and all that

- i dont remember shere khan’s motivation lmao i just remember he was The Bad Guy

- monstro is just like, a whale. yeah he eats people but i mean. he’s a whale

- probably true of the leopard or panther or whatever that is from tarzan too in hindsight but since the rest of the movie involves talking fully-aware animals with human level morals and intelligence it feels different

- i dont remember what the duke of weaseltown did other than being the duke of weaseltown and hes so funny i dont even really care. i think he was like trying to badly spy on arendelle or something but considering the whole hans situation i cant really care that much

- what was tamatoa’s deal. i remember him being shiny and thats it

- what was chernabog trying to do. i dont remember any sense of plot or motivation in the night on bald mountain sequence so for all we know he was just throwing a big spooky party for all his ghost friends. mind your business

- TERRY WAS JUST DOING THEIR JOB

- how is anton ego even a villain fsdjg he’s just a particularly harsh food critic

- i dont like Al Toybarn but like, he doesn’t know toys are alive. stealing woody was a shit thing to do but he doesn’t know it’s like, kidnapping

- syndrome was right in theory (making super abilities accessible to everyone, super heros shouldn’t get to be Better Than Everyone Else, etc) but also murdered like, a lot of people, and tried to steal a baby, so there’s that

also apology for not including these here

because i dont remember what madame mim was actually trying to do other than being a chaotic shapeshifter (i lov her but i do not remember that movie very well, excited to get to it in my rewatch quest), i dont remember ANYTHING about kaa other than “hypnotizes people” which. i guess puts him in orange tier and was the orangutan a villain???? what did he do. i remember he had a silly song and thats it

#disney villains #suggest tiermakers i should do lmao

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kusosamurai · 3 years

Note

Tell me a little about your 7 Shichibukai! What's their names and what do they do?

The AU in itself is a lot more lighthearted than One Piece can be, and it doesn't take itself too seriously (if that wasn't evident by Why Bother's fruit!)

From left to right, in the picture...

Rochambae is a frog zoan who has awakened his devil fruit power, becoming a "frog human" in the process. He is a self proclaimed prince and wielder of one of the black blades! His tongue is prehensile and he uses it as an additional limb in the heat of battle. Has a thing for the ladies. Crewless.

"Kami" Sumeru is a sky-islander and noncanon eater of the Pika Pika no Mi, officially making him a "light human." He is a God to the sky islanders through the use of his devil fruit, kind of like the foil to Enel; benevolent instead of malevolent. He only became a Shichibukai because of his obsession with balance, noting from his point above the oceans that a "great threat was looming" and he would be ready to fight. Commander of the Sky Islands.

Roflmango is the guy in the pink suit. Kind of an imposter Doflamingo, the guy has absolutely zero redeeming qualities and zero combat capability outside of his extreme wealth. Having all that money makes him an asset to the World Government! Hired mercenaries.

Don Gorilla may look like a zoan, but don't be confused! He's a mink, and gets extremely mad if you call him a zoan. He is a mafioso, the "Don" of his monkey mafia. Despite his name, he is an orangutan mink. Kind of makes you think, don't it? Monkey Mafia.

Heeble-Beeble is that brooding looking guy in the back, who will have no part of the silliness that is these guys. He ate the "Swarm-Swarm Fruit," which turns him into a swarm of bugs. Constantly has bugs surrounding him. The sole survivor of a tribe lost due to World Government intervention, they have made it up to him by offering him the position of Shichibukai and the resources to begin researching and restarting his tribe. Crewless.

Soaring Cameux (bare with me) is a martial artist who ate the "Nude-Nude Fruit," and becomes stronger the less clothing that he wears. He is an extreme weeb, and loves all things related to kung-fu. He believes that being a nudist is the ultimate freedom. His headband is his limiter, as it is the last piece of clothing on his body keeping him from achieving "full power." Nudist Pirates.

Goro Mitsu is a towering, powerful figure with a soft heart. He is a chef by trade who lost a culinary battle against the Shogun of Wano's head chef. Dishonored by this, he could either commit Seppuku or become an exile. He left a daughter and wife behind in Wano, traveling the world to learn of global cuisines and better himself so that he could rematch and win against the Shogun's chef. Ate the Gorilla Zoan fruit, which turns him into a gorilla. Paired with his size and power, it makes him a formidable foe.

That's them in a nutshell! Some are serious, some are sad, some are downright silly, but they live their lives romantically and with a DON!

#traveling band of morons #shichibukai #one piece au #one piece rp #one piece oc #oc #original character

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ponett · 4 years

Text

Three novels down in my journey through Discworld! I’ve now read Equal Rites. As the first book not starring Rincewind, this one shifts its focus from wizards to witches, introducing another series mainstay, Granny Weatherwax

While it’s still obvious from the start that this is set in the same world as Rincewind’s misadventures, Equal Rites immediately feels like a very different book. It still has Pratchett’s comedic flair, but this book is incredibly earnest compared to the farcical tone of the last two books. At first, I was a bit disappointed that this book wasn’t as constantly funny as The Light Fantastic, but by the end I was deeply engaged by its more heartfelt narrative

You see, with this book, Pratchett has started to move from simple genre parody to satire. Equal Rites still pokes fun at fantasy conventions, of course, but at its heart is an examination of sexism and gender roles. It just so happens that this story is told through witches and wizards

The story begins when an elderly wizard travels to the rural town of Bad Ass (the story of how the town got its name is apparently interesting, although it’s never shared in the book). On the Discworld, the eighth son of an eighth son can perform magic and become a wizard, and so this particular wizard plans to pass his staff on to such a child before he dies. Except there’s a problem: after the wizard passes his staff on to the expected newborn, he realizes too late that the baby is, in fact, a girl. And then he dies, and the world is left with is first female wizard

We skip ahead about seven or eight years, and now the young Eskarina Smith wants to learn wizard magic even though she’s a girl. The book feels a bit like a young adult novel at times because its protagonist is a kid, although the narration makes it clear that the book is still written for adults. This is not the world seen through a kid’s eyes, but rather an adult’s commentary on how a kid sees the world. (The need to mark the book as for adults in spite of its young hero is also probably why the opening paragraphs reference sex, and why lots of jokes about adult things that go over Esk’s head are sprinkled throughout.) Esk is joined by Granny Weatherwax, the town witch who isn’t really related to her but is described as basically being everyone’s granny

For the first act of the book, Granny acts sort of as an antagonist (albeit a very mild one), teaching Esk the differences between witch magic and wizard magic and trying to stop her from learning the latter. Wizard magic is portrayed as being bombastic, changing the fabric of reality and shooting lightning bolts out of their hands and that sort of thing. Witch magic, on the other hand, is more in tune with nature. A lot of it could hardly be described as proper “magic” at all, actually--lots of knowing about herbs and home remedies and things. Another witch in the story reads palms and tea leaves, but most of her business seems to be selling some kind of homemade birth control concoction

As Granny puts it, a big part of being a witch is “headology.” Witches have to lean into the theatricality of their profession with the pointy hats and the spookiness and whatnot in order to be treated like witches, and that does half of their job for them. It makes people trust that the home remedies work, or believe that a witch could really curse them, or that sort of thing. Of course, Granny does also know quite a bit of “real” magic as well. The main power she uses is “borrowing,” the act of mentally becoming one with an animal--not quite controlling it, but rather “suggesting” its actions. This leads to some fun sequences throughout the book, including one where she borrows the “mind” of an old building said to have developed something resembling a consciousness over the centuries so that she can locate Esk within it

While there was a good deal of magic in the last two books (even if Rincewind, famously, cannot perform magic), the depiction of wizard magic in these books has already changed. In the first book, Rincewind explained that it took years of studying and a ton of effort to perform any task with magic, making a lot of it seem pointless. But here, with just a staff and no proper training, Esk figures out how to turn one of her brothers into a pig, and teleport her staff to her, and all sorts of other things. Of course, this isn’t some sort of CinemaSins ding or anything. The priorities of the books have simply shifted. In a pure genre parody like The Color of Magic, it made sense to say that magic was actually kind of stupid and pointless. Here, being a wizard needs to be desirable, because Esk’s whole arc is about wanting to become a wizard

While Esk does do well with her witch lessons, eventually it becomes clear that she’s going to start figuring out how to use wizard magic with or without guidance, and Granny accepts that she can’t change Esk. After a bit of a journey in which they get separated and meet several side characters, Esk and Granny make their way to Unseen University. (While Rincewind is nowhere to be seen, the librarian who got turned into an orangutan in the last book is still around. He’s apparently refused to be turned back into a human and is happier this way.) Esk is humiliated by the wizards and turned down, but Granny manages to get Esk a job there as a housekeeper so that she might be able to pick up some magical knowledge while hanging around

In the climax, Esk uses her skills to save a fellow student she befriends named Simon from some eldritch horrors that wanted to take over his mind, and as a reward she’s named the first female wizard. But she realizes that being a wizard is kind of silly, and she and Simon go off to develop their own type of magic (which, if I’m understanding correctly, involves a good deal of Not Doing Magic). In the action of the climax, Granny also manages to show the head of the school that witches know a thing or two about magic as well, and is offered a position at the university (although it’s left unsaid whether or not she took it)

Overall, I really, really enjoyed this one. This was the first book in the series that felt like it took its characters and their problems seriously, writing them as people to empathize with instead of just vehicles for jokes. The gender-based conflict is simple, but effective. I really liked that Pratchett didn’t lean into Esk being Not Like Other Girls. She actually still quite likes the feminine witch magic, and uses those skills to her advantage. It’s just that she also wants to learn wizard magic. It’s not about one being better than the other, it’s about the gender divide being silly. The book shoots down the idea that there must be some fundamental physical or psychological difference between men and women that means they’re destined to excel in different fields, which is honestly a refreshing thing to read in a fantasy novel from over 30 years ago

While it might be a little convenient that the head wizard of the university was swayed to be less sexist so easily, I do think the ending struck a good balance. Sexism is ingrained into wizard culture, so he’s still got some biases against women, and he’s only considering letting a few women into the school to start. He’s taking baby steps. Some might see this as a failure because he only got a little better, but personally, I find this much more believable than if the book had ended with all the wizards deciding that witches were their equals and the school quickly achieving a 50/50 gender split

People don’t quite change like that overnight. But this book does still believe that people can change, challenge their preconceived biases, and become better. And I think that’s what really sets this book apart from the previous two. It’s the first glimmer of those humanist Discworld themes I’ve heard so much about

(Also I laughed every time a wizard said women couldn’t study as wizards because it was “against the lore”)

So yeah, good book. Very good book. Pratchett’s style is already rapidly evolving And next, it’s finally time... for the first Death novel. I couldn’t be more excited

#bobby reads discworld

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sunflower-swan · 4 years

Text

Wolfstar Chapter 20

A/N: Here’s what you need to know: I created this story for Writer’s Month 2020. Every day is a new prompt, and therefore a new chapter. This is an AU Wolfstar where Remus is a tattoo artist next door to Sirius who manages a flower shop. James and Lily are alive in this universe and own a coffee shop across the street. And to make parts of the story work with the prompts, Remus is about 10 years older than Sirius. It also takes place more or less in present time, minus Covid-19.

This is chapter 20 of a multi-chapter work. If you’d like to start from the beginning, here is chapter 1.

Disclaimer: I don’t own these characters. I just like to play with them.

Day 20 Prompt: Loss

Rating: Teen and Up

Word Count: 1297

Tags: babysitting, fluff, pet name, old scars, language

Chapter 20

Sirius

Simon & Garfunkel, “At the Zoo”

The monkeys stand for honesty

Giraffes are insincere

And the elephants are kindly but they're dumb

Orangutans are skeptical

Of changes in their cages

And the zookeeper is very fond of rum

The man who opened the door looked like Remus, but like...a Remus who wasn’t done yet. There were no silver strands peppering the sandy blonde. No crinkle in the corners of his eyes. His arms were inkless and criss-crossed with scars. Sirius sniffed...he smelled like Remus. The comforting scent of old books and chocolate grounded Sirius, but he still wondered, What the hell is going on here?

“Eh-- uh-- erm…” Sirius stammered.

Not-done-yet-Remus leaned against the doorframe. “Hey,” he said with a mischievous grin.

Sirius lifted his hand and poked the sort-of-stranger in the chest. He was real, Sirius wasn’t hallucinating. “Remus?”

“Yes?” His lashes fluttered.

“What…” Sirius looked Remus up and down, not believing his own eyes. “What did you do?”

Remus shrugged. “Oh...eating right, getting enough sleep...the usual.”

“No...but really,” Sirius took a step closer. He ran his fingertips across Remus' scarred collarbone that showed above his collar, and down his scarred arm. What have you done, Remus? Confused, he said, “You look…”

“How do I look?” Remus whispered.

“Different.”

“Different good or,” Remus forehead creased, “different bad?”

“Just...different.” Sirius looked up into Remus' face. “How did this happen?”

“Ok, fine.” Remus rolled his eyes. “I...might have...taken a teeny --” he rubbed the corner of his eye, “-- de-aging potion.”

Sirius took a step back and looked Remus over again. De-aging potion? That would explain the how, but it didn’t explain the… “Why?”

“You don’t like it?”

“Oh, Remus.” He shook his head and laughed. “I liked you just the way you were. Please, tell me this,” he gestured, “is not permanent.”

“It’s not permanent.”

“Thank goodness.” Sirius slid past Remus and marched up to the flat.

Remus shut and warded the door. “You have until 9 P.M. to enjoy twenty-five year old me,” he called.

Sirius reached the living room and collapsed on the couch. He tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling. Good grief. What in Merlin’s name was Remus thinking? This will be a weird damn day.

Remus appeared in the doorway, and then settled onto the couch next to Sirius. He crossed his legs, and leaned his head on Sirius’ shoulder.

“I’m sorry if I freaked you out,” Remus said. “I thought it would be funny. But now I’m stuck like this --” he held his arms out, “-- all day.”

Sirius reached out and traced three fingers along three dark, parallel scars that ran diagonal across Remus’ forearm and ended near his elbow. He felt Remus' body stiffen next to him.

“Sorry,” Sirius whispered. He withdrew his hand and leaned the side of his head against the top of Remus’ head which was still on his shoulder.

Remus lowered his arms to his lap. “It’s ok. There’s a reason I spent the time and money to cover them.”

He hoped it wasn’t too personal of a question when he asked, “How did you get them?”

“Me. Well...werewolf me.” Remus sighed. “It’s not so bad now with the Wolfsbane Potion. But before…” He shuddered.

A sudden RAP-TAP-TAP came from the kitchen window. They both jumped and gasped. Remus stood to let the small owl in. It swept in, landed on Sirius' lap, and stared at him until he removed the scroll from it’s leg. Then it gave a small hoot and flew back out the open window.

“Who’s it from?” Remus closed the window and walked back to the living room.

“James and Lily. Want to babysit Harry with me?”

~~~~~

One of the perks of being a Godfather, was spur of the moment babysitting duties. Sirius and Remus apparated to James & Lily’s house to take Harry off their hands for the afternoon. Lily had, in James’ opinion, made the colossal mistake of inviting her sister’s family to dinner that evening. Which meant Lily was beside herself wanting everything to go well. Her family tended to bring out her crazy a little bit. Not that her friends would ever tell her for fear of being hexed into oblivion. With Harry out of their hair for a few hours, James could calm Lily down and also help her with preparations.

After fielding questions about Remus’ appearance, James packed them a small backpack. He filled it with Harry’s favorite snacks, a bottle of water, a few small toys, sunscreen and a change of clothes. Then he plopped a bright yellow ball cap on Harry’s head, strapped the bag to his back, and pushed the three of them out the door with a hurried, “Thanks! Good luck!”

Sirius held Harry’s hand as they walked down the sidewalk.

“Wemus?” Harry said.

“Yes, Harry,” Remus replied. He slid his hands into his pockets and looked down at the boy.

“What happen to the pretty pictures on your arms?”

“I...uh…”

“He took them off for today, buddy.” Sirius saved Remus from attempting to explain the complexities of de-aging potions to a toddler.

“Oh, ok.” Harry shrugged.

Remus looked at him wide-eyed and mouthed, “Thank you.”

Sirius winked at Remus, then he asked Harry, “So, Harry, what do you want to do today?”

Harry gasped. “Can we go to the zoo?! Pleeeeease??”

“Sure.” Sirius chuckled.

~~~~~

They walked through the zoo at a leisurely pace, stopping to see each animal. Sirius noticed Remus hung back away from the exhibits most of the time. Harry was enthralled watching the kangaroos play with each other, so Sirius left him to it and walked to where Remus was standing a few feet away.

He stood next to Remus, watching Harry wave and talk to the kangaroos. “You ok?” Sirius nudged Remus with his shoulder.

“Animals don’t like me, especially typical prey animals.” He squinted. “It’s an instinct thing -- they can sense the werewolf predator inside me.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” Sirius asked. “We could have done something different.”

“Harry seemed so excited. I didn’t want to ruin his day.”

Sirius studied the side of Remus' face. When he had scrunched his eyes in explanation, Sirius could see his-Remus there for a moment. He knew it was only the outside that had changed, but it was still strange. Inside, Remus was the same thoughtful and caring person that Sirius had always known.

“Tell you what.” He reached for Remus' hand, and threaded their fingers together. “The next time you get a bizarre notion to take a temporary de-aging potion, we can go to Tate Modern or something.”

Remus' mouth fell open as he looked down and gazed at their interlocked hands.

“Oy…” Sirius gave Remus’ hand a squeeze. “Earth to Moony.”

“Moony?” Remus blinked at Sirius and lifted an eyebrow.

Sirius snickered. “Aw, Moony doesn’t like his pet name?”

Remus grinned and rolled his eyes. “If you insist.” He sighed.

“I do.” Sirius leaned over and kissed Remus on the cheek. The stubble was coarse against his lips. Remus tightened his grip on Sirius’ hand in response.

More than anything, Sirius wanted to snog him silly right there in the middle of the zoo. But Remus still had protective barriers up around himself. Sirius didn’t want to take a wrecking ball to them, so much as a sledgehammer and slowly chip them away.

“My Moony,” he whispered into Remus’ cheek.

“Uh...Sirius...where’s Harry?”

Shit! Sirius raked his eyes over the kangaroo enclosure. His heartbeat was in his throat as he looked left and right. “Harry!” he yelled.

Harry was nowhere in sight. Sirius had lost his Godson. James and Lily were going to kill him.

“We’ll find him,” Remus reassured Sirius. “He couldn’t have gone far. Where do you think he would go?”

Sirius ran his hand across his chin and looked around, trying to push down the panic. “Um...I have an idea. Follow me!” He ran, with Remus right behind him.

A/N: Ok, so here’s the dealio. I have the last ten chapters of this fic mapped out, but they are not words on a page yet. Real life finally caught me, dammit. I will finish this fic if for no other reason than I don’t know the meaning of the word “quit.”

While I may not “win” the writer’s challenge, I still got a pretty cool story out of it, and I’ve had a lot of fun writing it and sharing it. Like I tell my students, failure is always an option; it’s the only way we learn and improve.

I will hopefully get at least one, if not two, chapters out per week. So, subscribe and sign up for notifications, or leave a comment if you want to be tagged when I post a new chapter. I promise, promise, promise I am not abandoning this fic.

XOXO

#writersmonth2020 #wolfstar #remus lupin #sirius black #remus x sirius #sirius x remus #harry potter mauraders #mauraders #young Harry Potter #alternate universe #slow burn #harry potter #fanfiction #fanfic

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aion-rsa · 3 years

Text

The Watch Episode 4 Review: Twilight Canyons

https://ift.tt/3q4thtV

This The Watch review contains spoilers.

The Watch Episode 4

“Twilight Canyons” embraces The Watch’s theme of being “inspired by,” but not adapting, Pratchett’s Discworld novels through its blink-or-you’ll-miss-it references to several of the books less closely related to the adventures of Vimes and company. In that, it progresses its own plot much further, and only delves into the over-the-top silliness of the previous episode briefly, making it feel as though this series may come into its own in the next few episodes.

At the end of the last episode, Carcer, his union-forming goblin entourage, and female wizard companion Wonce, had realized that the key to controlling the dragon was a sword in the hands of a former member of the Assassins’ Guild. Vimes and company, having not yet connected the dots, are a step behind. Lady Sybil, used to vigilante work, has gone on her own to track down Wonce and managed to snag some of the woman’s hair, but not much else. Knowing Angua’s keen sense of smell could lead them to Wonce, Sybil joins up again with the Watch, who follow the lead. Unfortunately for them, Wonce has laid a trap, and several “drag goblins” (which seems to be a reference to the makeup worn on top of the underfunded prosthetics donned by the actors) nearly do them in. They’re only rescued by a smaller goblin to whom Cheery was kind earlier in the episode.

Meanwhile, Carcer and Wonce have traveled to Twilight Canyons—a place of grave danger and rage, according to Wonce’s contact. But when they enter, Carcer and Wonce are surprised to find that it’s a retirement home, full of elderly people with various states of memory loss. They find Jocasta Wiggs, the former-assassin who stole the dragon-controlling sword from the Assassins’ Guild. Now aged, her memory faded, she can tell them nothing—but they discover a mural the woman once painted on her wall, telling the story of how she and another woman stole the sword and traveled the world with it, finally reaching the very edge.

“What magic is so powerful that it can drive two women to the edge of the world?” Wonce asks. She and Carcer interpret from the mural that Jocasta was betrayed and the other woman took the sword for herself. When Jocasta says a single word—Perpetua—the villains realize that it’s the name of the woman, who was buried above Jocasta’s empty tomb in the cemetery for traitorous assassins. They retrieve the blade and head to the area where children are “thrown away” to a life on the streets, intending to summon the dragon—but nothing happens. The sword’s hilt has been swapped out.

The Watch are out of leads, until retired Sergeant Swires (no relation to the novel watchman of the same name), sends them a lead from Twilight Canyons, where he now lives. Through Carrot’s continued use of real detective work (mainly looking at actual files for information), he realizes that Perpetua is the one who put Jocasta in Twilight Canyons, leaving her with a cane. When the Watch interprets the mural, they see it differently: they see two women traveling the world, seeing all its wonders, even as they run from the assassins pursuing them. The missing hilt, they realize, is the handle of Jocasta’s cane, which she entrusted to Swires once she stopped walking. Sure that Carcer and Wonce will realize their mistake, Vimes makes a plan to trap the two, battling over the sword. When Swires begins to raise an objection, Vimes interrupts, standing his ground, insisting that the others follow HIS plan for once instead of going off on their own.

But of course, things don’t go as planned. When Vimes and Carcer begin to battle (at the same time that Wonce and Sybil face off), the magical security system traps the two pairs of combatants, locking them in a dance number (to the disconcerting accompaniment of Wham’s “Wake Me up Before You Go-Go”) the ends with Carcer being teleported elsewhere and Wonce losing the sword to Sybil and retreating. With the sword and hilt now in the possession of the Watch, Vimes has Jocasta place her hands on the hilt as they put it back together, only for the sword—Wayne, stage name Gawain—to inform them that it doesn’t remember how to control the dragon. It does, however, reveal that only lovers can hear its voice (to the resounding protests of all the Watch members who aren’t Cheery, who seems to view herself as a lover).

The Watch brings Jocasta to Unseen University in an attempt to restore her memory of the sword’s abilities. Meanwhile, Carcer is in the interdimensional space of the auditors, a group of seemingly omniscient and extremely powerful beings who support order and science—and none of that dream or hope nonsense—who view Carcer’s dimension’s Watch, who are beginning to believe in themselves, as a cosmic threat. They send him back, saying it’s his last chance—and he and Wonce enlist the disgraced head of the Thieves’ Guild to steal the sword.

The Watch: Why Did the Discworld Adaptation Do THAT to a Major Character?

By Juliette Harrisson

The Watch Controversy Explained: How Different is the Show From Discworld?

By Juliette Harrisson

The episode features a number of nuggets for Pratchett fans. Early on, Vimes, irritated that Sybil has taken matters into her own hands instead of letting him do his job, gives her a rousing rendition of the “Captain Sam Vimes Boots Theory on Socioeconomic Unfairness,” including this gem:

VIMES: Eyes closed, I know just where I am in this city just by the feel of the stone beneath my toes.

This direct reference to the novels is one of the few in this episode, though there are smaller nods throughout. Cheery admits that when all the Watch lost their eyebrows, it wasn’t the “little blue men” at fault (a reference to the Nac Mac Feegle introduced in the “Tiffany Aching” books). The villainous (though not imaginative enough to be evil) Auditors of Reality play a role in several Discworld novels. The loudspeaker in Twilight Canyons mentions the name of resident Cohen the Barbarian, Discworld’s greatest warrior hero. And the name “Twilight Canyons” is a reference to an unfinished Pratchett project, in which the aging community of a retirement home, many in states of memory loss (a subject close to Pratchett’s heart; Pratchett had early onset Alzheimers and was vocal in raising community awareness).

The episode also nicely refers to “The Wat,” featuring Vimes playing guitar to Good Boy, Sybil’s small dragon, during the episode’s opening. Should the musical skill of the members of the Watch continue to be relevant in future episodes, some of my previous complaints about “The Wat” may diminish.

While “Twilight Canyons” does a lot to move forward the season plot, with Vimes in possession of an artifact, a reveal about other artifacts that Vetinari wants under her control, and with the big reveal about the powers behind Carcer’s reappearance, the episode also has a strong internal theme about love. Opening with Carrot trying to ask Angua if she’d be interested in doing something social (and abjectly failing), the episode moves to Vimes almost recalling to Cheery his vision from “The Wat,” in which he was married to and happy with Sybil. Gawain—Wayne—the talking sword can only be heard by lovers.

The secret behind unlocking Jocasta’s memories is in helping her remember the love she shared with Perpeuta. And Cheery, revealed as fully a romantic, encourages Carrot’s feelings for Angua, referencing her own lost love as a reason not to delay. (Jo Eaton-Kent’s Cheery is really the star of this episode all together; their fantastic comedic delivery throughout reduces the overburdened earnestness of the previous episode and allows some of the humor to come from the characters themselves, not rely on the world’s delve into sheer absurdity.) Even Death is revealed to be someone lonely who’d love a friend to have drinks with—much to Carrot’s surprise when the offer is made.

While the silliness of the dance number in “Twilight Canyons” works less well than it was clearly intended, the interplay between the characters and the forward momentum of the story raises this one above its predecessor. The makeup work remains atrocious (possibly even worse than in previous episodes), and despite references to Koom Valley reenactors, we’ve still seen none of Pratchett’s numerous dwarf-sized dwarves in Ankh-Morpork. (The Librarian curiously looks slightly more like an orangutan in this episode.) Though the characters remain departures from their book forms, the clear reference to other versions of the Watch by the very strange and ominous auditors pulling Carcer’s strings seems to be a justification for this very different version of Discworld.

If it can find its stride in the next couple of episodes, the series will be worth bingeing once it’s complete. But the key word here is still “if.”

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