trying to get through fishman island needed to remind myself what its all about (getting to punk hazard for law)
(heres the picture)
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[ID: A ceramic teapot shaped like Orko. The body is hollow, and one of the hands is removable for pouring tea. The head is also hollow and can be used as a cup or for tea storage. The body, head, and hat are not completely proportional, so the hat is a bit out of place, but overall the sculpture looks very cute. /end ID]
Orko in my ceramics class. What teas will I brew in him?
(Process images and commentary under the cut!)
[ID: The body, head, and hat have been formed from wet clay. The body has an additional scarf, and the head has no eyes yet. /end ID]
[ID: The completed form, still wet, to serve as a mockup of the final product. The eyes have been added to the head. /end ID]
[ID: The head, body, and hat, now baked. The scarf is missing. The parts have gone from a dull gray to a pale pink. /end ID]
[ID: The remnants of the scarf, which must have fallen and broken while the pot was being transported back to the classroom. I plan to make him a new one out of fabric at some point. /end ID]
[ID: The parts of Orko, glazed and ready to be baked one last time. It was at this point I realized the loose hand (intended to be removable) didn’t want to stay in the pot, and while I hoped placing it into the arm hole would work I was wrong. In hindsight I should have made the sleeve opening solid like the other side and cut it off to use as a lid, but I didn’t think about that until it was too late. /end ID]
[ID: The finished parts of Orko once more. /end ID]
[ID: The finished hat. /end ID]
[ID: The finished head, which gives Orko a little smile that will be covered by the scarf. I thought it looked cuter that way. /end ID]
[ID: The body again. By layering two different glazes, his coat is red but the O is black, as it should be. /end ID]
The hand didn’t stay in the armhole and didn’t get baked at all. I had to go looking for it in the studio. So far I’ve washed it off and put on a coat of paint in a similar color. Eventually I’ll figure out how to make it stay in the arm hole, too. He’s not the most structurally sound guy, and I’d like to maybe add on some parts so I don’t have to worry about him falling apart when in use, but I’m glad he’s finally done!
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they want to talk about mental illness and acceptance and how everyone is a little ocd it's cute and quirky and their "intrusive thoughts" are about cutting their hair off and you say yours are about taking a razorblade to your eye and they say ew can you not and everyone is a little adhd sometimes! except if you're late it's a personality flaw and it's because you are careless and cruel (and someone else with adhd mentions they can be on time, so why can't you?) and it's not an eating disorder if it's girl dinner! it's not mania if it's girl math! what do you mean you blew all of your savings on nonrefundable plane tickets for a plane you didn't even end up taking. what do you mean that you are afraid of eating. get over it. they roll their little lips up into a sneer. can you not, like, trauma dump?
they love it on them they like to wear pieces of your suffering like jewels so that it hangs off their tongue in rapiers. they are allowed to arm-chair diagnose and cherrypick their poisons but you can't ever miss too many showers because that's, like, "fuckken gross?" so anyone mean is a narcissist. so anyone with visual tics is clearly faking it and is so cringe. but they get to scream and hit customer service employees because well, i got overwhelmed.
you keep seeing these posts about how people pleasers are "inherently manipulative" and how it's totally unfair behavior. but you are a people pleaser, you have an ingrained fawn response. in the comments, you have typed and deleted the words just because it is technically true does not make it an empathetic or kind reading of the reaction about one million times. it is technically accurate, after all. you think of catholic guilt, how sometimes you feel bad when doing a good deed because the sense of pride you get from acting kind - that pride is a sin. the word "manipulation" is not without bias or stigma attached to it. many people with the fawn response are direct victims of someone who was malignantly manipulative. calling the victims manipulative too is an unfair and unkind reading of the situation. it would be better and more empathetic to say it is safety-seeking or connection-seeking behavior. yes, it can be toxic. no, in general it is not intended to be toxic. there is no reason to make mentally ill people feel worse for what we undergo.
you type why is everyone so quick to turn on someone showing clear signs of trauma but you already know the fucking answer, so what's the point of bothering. you kind of hate those this is what anxiety looks like! infographics because at this point you're so good at white-knuckling through a severe panic attack that people just think you're stoic. even people who know the situation sometimes comment you just don't seem depressed. and you're not a 9 year old white kid so there's no way you're on the spectrum, you're not obsessed with trains and you were never a good mathematician. okay then.
mental illness is trending. in 2012 tumblr said don't romanticize our symptoms but to be fair tiktok didn't exist yet. there's these series of videos where someone pretends to be "the most boring person on earth" and is just being a normal fucking person, which makes your skin crawl, because that probably means you are boring. your friend reads aloud a profile from tinder - no depressed bitches i fucking hate that mental illness crap. your father says that medication never actually works.
you still haven't told your grandmother that you're in therapy. despite everything (and the fact it's helping): you just don't want her to see you differently.
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