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#[maul voice] i'm bored
maulfucker · 5 months
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the truth is. the porn is just an excuse to put this guy in Situations
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thornsnvultures · 7 months
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anywhere || eddie munson x plus size!reader
cw: angst, talking about drug usage, eddie's in the hospital post-vecna, your mom kinda fuckin sucks, best friend!eddie who likes you more than you realize
a/n: that one line in the muppet babies theme song fucks me up every time. literally every time I hear it I tear up. so thanks for that jim henson.
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"When your world looks kinda weird and you wish you weren't there," Eddie's terrible Kermit impression makes you laugh so hard you almost spill the bowl of cereal you're pouring. You hit him back with your equally terrible baby Miss Piggy voice.
"Just close your eyes and make believe that you could be anywhere!"
Eddie snorts at the way your voice cracks trying to hit notes your voice was not made to hit.
"Shut up, that was flawless and you know it," you hand Eddie his bowl with a grin and plop down on the couch next to him. Were you watching cartoons made for children? Yes, but who didn't love Kermit the Frog and his adorable little muppet friends?
You missed this, being here with Eddie. A lot had changed since you started going to college last year while Eddie stayed behind to be a senior for a third time, but not this. Your friendship never changed. It was something you treasured coming home to, when you could. School was starting to pile up and these visits were becoming few and far between, but Eddie would always be your Eddie. You were sure of it.
"So you're leading up Hellfire now, huh?," you asked Eddie as you finished your cereal. He took your bowl and put it on the coffee table with his, not meeting your eyes. Maybe you shouldn't have brought it up. The two of you didn't talk about it much, him still being in school. Like you didn't want to break the spell that everything was normal. The two of you hanging out like normal, like you did since you were kids. It was comfortable, you didn't want to ruin that.
"Yeah the, uh...yeah. It's up to me now I guess. The guys know they can't compete with my campaigns."
He's smiling, all cocky because it's true, they're always amazing. But his smile doesn't quite reach his eyes.
Weren't your just saying nothing had changed? Maybe you a lot had changed and you just weren't paying attention.
"I miss adventuring with you," you sigh, snuggling into Eddie's side until he puts his arm over your shoulder. "And the guys."
"Yeah, they miss you too," Eddie's voice sounds strained. You try to move thinking you're laying on him in a weird way, but he just pulls you closer, tighter.
You spend the rest of the morning watching cartoons. Eventually you forget the weird tension, putting it aside to enjoy your day with your best friend before you have to leave again.
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It's a year before you see Eddie again.
School was tough, taking up so much of your free time you barely saw anyone besides the librarian and the two people you shared a dorm room with. You had tried to join a DnD club at school but your schedule didn't line up well with the rest of the group. And it wasn't the same. You missed Eddie's energy, his frantic dramatics. The guys were cool but sticklers for rules and, to put it nicely, boring.
You couldn't take being away from home any longer, you missed your friend.
So when your mom called one Friday afternoon and told you, in her own bizarre and nonchalant way, that Eddie had been in some trouble recently and, "I'm sure you saw the news about the earthquakes," you came straight home.
"You know, I always thought he was a nice boy. Did you know he was selling... grass," your mom whispered the last word like police officers would be knocking down her door if she spoke too loud.
"I didn't." You did. You also partook, but your mother didn't need to know that.
"Anyway, everyone got all upset when that little cheerleader died, but when they found him, like that, I guess they thought he was a victim too. Can't maul yourself like that, that's for sure."
"Oh my god, mom," you stand up, your chair harshly scraping against the linoleum. You can't sit here and listen to this any more.
"Where are you going? I have a pie in the oven."
Your mom follows you to the door, huffing like you're the one being ridiculous. She never liked Eddie much but the ease with which she talks about your childhood best friend being... mauled...
"I'll be back later."
You don't wait for her to respond, slamming the door as you go. You hop in the hand-me-down car your dad gave you before you left for school, peeling down the drive and heading straight for the hospital like you should've done when you got back. Tears cloud the edges of your vision until they spill over, you don't bother wiping them away.
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"Hey, you're Eddie's girl."
"Excuse me?"
A short, curly haired boy in a baseball cap appears next to you when you ask the receptionist where Eddie's room is located.
"It's okay, Brenda. She's with me." You snort out a laugh when the boy tips his hat to the woman behind the desk. Her smile and the wave of her hand tells you she is in fact used to this.
"I'm Dustin," the kid explains as you follow him through the maze of hallways and elevators. "Eddie's told me a lot about you. Recognized you from the picture he thinks I don't know about in his glove box. Not my fault he just shoves stuff in there. If he didn't want everything to spill out he should organize. Not that I'm great at organizing either-"
"I'm sorry," you stop Dustin's rambling, your head spinning from all that information, narrowing in on the one that stuck. "He keeps my picture in his van?"
"Yeah a few in his room too. He's just down here. You just missed the guys, Jeff had to go to work and he was their ride so they left. Wayne will be in later. He usually stops by after work."
Dustin kept talking and you tried to keep up but the closer you got to Eddie's room the more your ears rang and your chest felt tight. You knew it was bad, he'd been in for a few days and was still heavily sedated after a number of surgeries. Wayne told you the day before you came back on the phone that he might not be awake when you got here. The old man might've been trying to spare you the trip, but you were coming to see him no matter what. You should've come back a long time ago.
Standing outside his room now, the year you were away felt like an eternity now. How had your Eddie changed? Was he your Eddie anymore? Was he ever yours?
"Hey, you comin' in? He's still sleeping."
Steeling yourself with one deep breath, you enter Eddie's room. With one look at Eddie and you're asking Dustin for a minute alone, pulling up a chair by his side.
"Sorry I'm late, Eddie. Traffic coming out of the city is crazy." You laugh at your stupid joke because you'll cry if you do anything else. You don't think about the air tube in his nose or the beeping heart monitor, the bandages on his arms or how hollow, how fragile he looks.
"My mom said you've been selling 'grass'," you chuckle as you twist one of his curls around your finger. "Should I tell her how many times I snuck out to smoke with you? She's already mad at me for taking time off from school to be here."
Eddie lays there as you talk, sleeping softly as you compliment the cards and flowers on the window sill. You tell him how the past two semesters of school have been, how miserable you've been without him, how guilty you've felt for "missing" his calls, not reading his letters because you've been too exhausted to do anything that wasn't surviving and work.
You're holding his weirdly ring-less fingers, contemplating leaving instead of holding out hope that he'll wake up while you're here, when you hear a familiar theme song on the television.
"When your world looks kind of weird,"
Your gaze falls from the TV to your friend in his hospital bed.
"And you wish you weren't there,"
Your eyes close wishing you were back in Eddie's house, stoned out of your mind doing muppet impressions.
A tear falls down your cheek as you close your eyes and sing along with Miss Piggy, not caring how ridiculous you sound.
"Just close your eyes and make believe and you can be anywhere."
You choke on a sob, suddenly angry at this stupid kids show for making you lose it when you were holding yourself together so well.
"Still sounds awful."
You open your eyes, wiping your tears away with your hand not in Eddie's at the groggy sound of his voice. He's holding the other one tight, almost too tight, like you'll run if he lets go.
"That was a perfect impression," the words stutter on a heaving breath but you're smiling through it.
"I'm on so many drugs."
"I'll go get the nurse," you laugh, trying to pull yourself together.
"No," Eddie just barely tugs on your hand, not yet strong enough to pull you close. "Don't leave."
"I'm not, I won't. I'm here, Eddie. I'm sorry."
Eddie's eyes flutter shut, too tired yet for a full conversation, but he won't let your hand go. You find the call button next to the bed to call the nurse and wait.
"I'm not going anywhere."
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🖤
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wolfythewitch · 1 year
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She isn't really sure why she did it to begin with.
    Maybe it's because she's bored, all alone in her nest strung together by weeds and grass, decorated by a ribcage here or a femur there. Maybe it's because the man looked different, kinder somehow, a faint smile on his face despite how empty the roads were. He looked young, his face red in the midday heat, smile lines on his cheek. Maybe it's because of the blindfold he wore around his eyes, a thick gauzy thing, and a staff held loosely in his hand, tapping the ground before him in intervals. He walked with certainty, like he knew where he was meant to go. Where he had to go to slay her. Still, he cannot see. He will not be able to see her if she hides. 
    And hide she did, behind the trees and the brush and the forest floor, nestled among the grass and leaves with her breath as silent as can be. She was curious, and it got awfully boring waiting for the humans to come to her. These paths are long and winded and these woods are not safe when night falls. Her soon-to-be meal walks through without a care in the world, humming a simple tune as he just waltzes on into her territory. He amused her. Surely he would have perished by now, mauled by the stray monster or beats, had her presence not warded them away. It was not because he was blind, she knew enough not to underestimate humans, even with their scars. No, it was the way he carried himself, confident to an arrogant degree, unnervingly cheerful. It was as if he did not know the dangers of these woods, or perhaps he did not care. 
    Her eyes trail him for a few seconds longer, before the warrior stills, staff coming to a rest at his side. His other hand wanders to the hilt of his sword, fingers tapping on it a nervous rhythm. 
    "Who's there?" He calls out. It's a pleasant voice, all things considered. "I can feel you staring at me." 
    Ah, so he did. She did say that humans were not to be underestimated. They're strange, so fragile despite their tenacity. Yet, they thrive in the harshest of environments, like a weed that refuses to die. 
    She dons on her skin suit, an elegant thing that wouldn't fool the common man. It does well enough, she thinks, but it can't do much to hide the head of feathers she has instead of hair, or the ways her fingers stretch into long talons. Still, it will placate the human, if his senses are to be followed. Stepping out into the light, she says,
    "Oh– I'm so sorry." Her voice is a bit rough from disuse, but perhaps she can blame it on the thirst. "I think I'm a bit lost–? I can't seem to find my way around here."
    "Ah." The stranger's hand drops from his blade. Foolish man. His face loosens with relief, mouth widening into a grin. "No worries, mate. I'm heading down this path. Care to join? We can keep each other company until the next town over– if that's where you're headed to, that is." 
    He's so trusting, she muses. He did not even think to ask why she had been in these woods of all places. 
    "Oh! That would be great." She says, relieved. "I was so worried about having to spend the night here alone." 
    The stranger chuckles. "Of course. You can never be too careful in this place." She tries not to laugh. "My name's Phil. Can I have yours?"
    She ponders for a moment. "Kristin." She decides, rolling it around in her mouth, satisfied with the way it sings. "You can call me Kristin." 
Hi guys guess what I wrote at 3am
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amostimprobabledream · 2 months
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Smash or Pass the Bleach Captains?
I've always wanted to answer this question! (Going with the TYBW roster of captains here.)
Shunsui Kyoraku
Normally I don't like hairy men, but he's a Smash. You get the feeling he knows what he's doing, he could teach you a lot. Plus the fact he becomes head captain means fucking him is like an instant boost of clout.
Soi Fon Pass. She's pretty and has a great character design, but she ain't my type. Not to mention she seems to have some unresolved Yoruichi issues to sort out.
Rose Otoribayashi
Who? Anyway, Pass. There's nothing about Rose I find particularly interesting as a character and Bleach has much sexier blondes than him.
Retsu Unohana
Pass. I've never really cared much about Unohana as a character because I always found her "soft-spoken but terrifies everyone" gimmick kind of stale, especially since I thought the reveal of her being the First Kenpachi was so obvious. Her design is fine but not my personal tastes.
Shinji Hirako
I love Shinji as a character, but I think I'd prefer to hang out with him than fuck him. Though, I can't help but feel he'd be great with his tongue...but...realistically, Pass.
Byakuya Kuchiki
Byakuya's personality is kind of dull for my personal tastes, but that face card of his doesn't decline, so Smash.
Saijin Komamura
I'm not a furry, so Pass. I'd hang with him, though.
Lisa Yadomaru
Pass. I like Lisa but the glasses and braids look isn't my thing. Also she's so deadpan I'd fine it hard to tell if she was being serious or not.
Kensei Muguruma SMASH SMASH SMASH. He is SO fine and so mean. I love the punk aesthetic, I love his voice and THEM ARMS. God. Kensei's one of my personal hottest Bleach men, I've loved him ever since he was first revealed with the piercings and the crew cut. When his TBTP haircut was shown I went mental. (I like his current look but Kensei with bangs was elite.) Also his surly attitude is very attractive to me. What can I say, I like 'em mean.
Toshiro Hitsugaya
Pass. Like 90% of time he looks like a middle-schooler, and even in his adult form, his personality isn't really attractive to me, it's that stick-in-the-mud attitude for other more bombastic characters like Rangiku to bounce off. I don't find Hitsugaya especially interesting on his own. His eyes are pretty, though.
Kenpachi Zaraki
Smash. Yeah, I'd fuck Kenpachi, he'd maul you like a bear but in a good way. Also I find his laid-back cockiness kind of refreshing. And his mouth is enormous, if you know what I mean. And the MUSCLES. You'd definitely come multiple times.
Mayuri Kurotsuchi
Smash. I've always liked Mayuri and under all his facepaint he is SMOKING hot. Is he evil? Yes. Does he have a nice voice, cool af fight scenes and is consistently one of the smartest, most interesting characters? Also yes. I love intelligent men.
Jushiro Ukitake
Pass. Firstly my friend is in love with him so I don't want to lewd her husband. Secondly, he's just so not my type - objectively he's a very pretty man but I find his personality extremely boring. Nice guys just don't float my boat, and I generally don't go for men with long hair. (Sorry, fam. XD)
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tragedybunny · 1 year
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Little One, Little Pet
Darth Maul x F!Reader - NSFW, Dom!Maul, Dubious Consent - Reader is Maul's plaything
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The sun is setting and you realize you've been in the hangar since dawn. Whatever the last run the modified freighter went on, it left some interesting marks. But every job was insanity since the Shadow Collective formed, and your repair work never stopped. Though they did pay you a fortune as you were one of the best mechanics in the system. It wasn't just the money that kept you around though, there was a feeling of freedom and adventure you wouldn't get in a corporate shipyard. Even with all the unique challenges, it was worth it. There was also him, but you tried not to think about that too much, only when you were being really honest with yourself. 
Glancing at the open panel with wires still spread everywhere, you sighed. The rest would have to wait until tomorrow. Descending from the wing, you started cleaning up the mess of tools that had been left in your wake. "Hello Little One." The voice behind you nearly made you jump, even if you were familiar with it. It held the promise of power and danger. 
Turning, you incline your head respectfully. "Lord Maul." You hold your breath, who would he
be today, the Sith Lord, the madman, the gangster, or the lost son?
He snorts, "I'm in no mood for formality." That didn't narrow it down much, probably not the Sith Lord though. "Come, drink with me."
"Of course." It wasn't the first time your late hours made you his companion by default. Everyone else was wise enough to be in their quarters by now. Removing the fluid stained coveralls from over your clothes, you hurry to catch up. Maul never waits, expecting you to follow, the distinct sound of his metal footsteps leading you along. 
You trail after him to an office, once a corporation owned this building, before they refused to fall in line. He’s already pouring two glasses of Alderaanian Whiskey, a mellow and smooth spirit. The bottle was here when he took over. Lost son or madman it is. Steeling yourself, you walk over and reach for a glass. 
With terrifying speed, Maul grabs your wrist, and pulls you down with him as he sits in the waiting chair, once an unknown executive’s luxury. He presses his nose to your skin and inhales, “I could kill you right now, you know.” 
A question you’ve heard before, the first time it rightfully terrified you, but by now, you are only sensibly anxious. “I know Lord Maul.” 
An iron grip tangles in your hair. “I said no formality.” Exposing your throat with that grip, he nips your neck, teeth lingering long enough to bruise. Macabre excitement envelops you, your pulse races, and taboo desire makes warmth build between your legs. Maul’s laughter tickles your ear. “You’re too easy Little one,” his hand releases your hair, “drink.”
Feeling your skin flush, you lean forward, taking one of the glasses of whiskey and sipping slowly. It doesn’t help as you feel yourself grow light headed almost instantly, leaving you pliable in his arms. Maul finishes his drink in one gulp and returns to marking your neck, his other arm locking you in place. “Maul,” you whimper weakly, knowing he wouldn’t stop even if you wanted him to. 
“Finish your drink.” You obey and as soon as the glass leaves your hand, he grows bored of just your neck and begins to tear away your shirt, elongated nails shredding it. Fingers slide over your breasts, nails skimming your nipples, pain out of balance with pleasure. Your arm almost moves to shield yourself, but a low growl from him warns you to stay in place. Fingers pluck at them, pinching and playing, but more gentle now, and you’re floating away into that space only he can take you too. Leaning down, his teeth go back to work, roaming over your skin, turning it black and blue, and in some cases drawing blood. You moan senselessly, no words for what he does to you, you feel you’ve become slick with your own wetness. A final harsh pinch to a tortured nipple brings you back into focus just enough to realize he’s opening your pants. 
“The things I’d do to you if I were still whole. Oh but I have ways to make up for that.” You tense for a moment, a fresh rush of fear, but it's too late, his hand has reached your sex, wet and swollen with desire. Fingers enter you with no warning, spreading you wide harshly. Yelping you squirm, but he’s holding you even tighter. “Isn’t this what you wanted Little One?” Mercilessly they move back and forth building you up to a release, even with the feeling of being uncomfortably. Just as you reach the precipice, he pulls back, and you crash back down. 
More laughter, and you fight to sit up. “We’re not done yet.” A single digit traces along your clit, and begins to rub in slow, maddening circles. Almost no friction is afforded to you, and the emptiness inside you feels like it will drive you mad. Desperately you buck your hips, trying to convey your need. Cruelly he squeezes your clit in response, his voice low and dangerous. “You are not in control here. If there is something you want, beg me for it.” This is what he enjoys, the power, the control, knowing you are desperate for what he can do to you. 
“Maul-” He squeezes your clit harshly and you yelp. Staring dumbly for a second, you can’t understand what he wants. Then it comes to you. He is always the Sith Lord, deep down inside, no matter what face he shows. “Lord Maul, please let me cum.” 
Sighing, he looks at you as though indulging a poorly behaved pet. “Very well.” Fingers roughly enter you again, working you relentlessly, his thumb finds your clit, guiding you on. Once you may have found it humiliating but now you continue to beg him, until a wave of bliss crashes over you and you go limp. Arms pull you a bit closer, keeping you from sliding onto the floor. “You may have two minutes to gather your senses, Little One.” Sometimes it seems like he might almost like you. 
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kaythetrashcan · 6 months
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Five nights at Freddy's movie review
Spoiler free version:
I finally saw the FNaF movie (since it premiered here like a week later) and I really wanna talk about it.
It was fun. It's its own story that has some similarities to the games but it works well on its own which is a good thing imo.
It has a good pacing and I didn't get bored.
There are bunch of hints and easter eggs in reference to the games, like a guy is wearing a Midnight Motorist sweater or a dinner is named after Sparky the Dog, a hoax in early fnaf days.
It has violence but it's not too gory, most stuff happens off screen or in shadows.
I also liked the final solution, it was well established.
I do have 2 complains
1. I think most relationships needed more establishment.
2. One character kinda confuses me on their motive.
Overall I'd give it 4/5, though you'll get more of it if you're a fnaf fan.
And some tips. Watch it at home if you can or pick a later date. The movie theater was crowded and I think it hindered my enjoyment.
When you see Sparky's diner, pay attention to the waiter. You won't regret it.
And wait till the end of all credits.
Spoiler review under the cut
I think Mike and Abby needed a bit more time together or thinking of each other to make the scene where Mike realizes how much she means to him more impactful.
I feel like we were told rather shown she likes her brother.
Same goes for relationship between her and aunt Jane. We're told once she doesn't like her but it isn't enough to make her turn on Mike believable to me.
And finally Vanessa and William. The ending implies she's scared of him but we never are shown why.
This segways nicely into my other complain. Vanessa feels inconsistent. She starts out as a friendly police officer who knows tad too much about Freddy's and is revealed to be William's daughter.
What I got is that she vaguely warns the guards of the danger but doesn't tell them what it is. When the animatronics are friendly, she just let's Mike and Abby vibe there but when she learns Mike used Abby to get info on Garrett's kidnapper (her dad) she forbids him from taking Abby there ever again. I'm guessing this is to protect her dad.
But I think we should have had a flashback to her childhood and maybe a scene where she's terrified of going to the pizzeria but the she sees a drawing of Mike and Abby a decides to help.
But enough about stuff I didn't like and more about stuff I loved, in no particular order.
Actors are all really great and they did a fantastic job.
The opening credits are in style of old arcade games, just like in fnaf 2. It genuinely made me so happy to see it.
The cupcake mauling a man was both hilarious and terrifying. You go Carl!
The animatronics are all really expressive, especially Chica, when she smuggly sends Carl the Cupcake to murder a man or when she winks at Mike. Or when Freddy was looking for Mike and tilting his head as if he were listening.
I almost missed MatPat's cameo. I was like: "I know that voice! But from where?" And then he said: "It's just a theory!" and I almost screamed.
I love that the kids have some significance. Even if they dont have names, they still have more to do than they ever did in the games.
Also, it's exactly 5 nights at Freddy's.
1 - Mike arrives and sees the Missing kids for the first time.
2 - Mike gets scratched by Foxy and Vannesa shows up to info dump.
3 - since Max is dead, Mike takes Abby there for the first time. He cleans up the place and Abby meets her friends.
4 - Mike takes Abby there a second time, Vannesa shows up, they build a Fort and Vannessa gets mad.
5 - Mike goes there alone and the movie finale happens.
I noticed the trailer was insanely misleading. Vanessa ends up in the hospital at the end of the movie, but the trailer made it seem it happens somewhere in the middle.
CoryXKenshin cameo was awesome.
The ending credits song is Five Nights at Freddy's by TLT. Woho!!!
And after all the credits roll, we get a few letters spelling out "FIND ME" like in SAVE HIM minigame from fnaf 2.
Theories:
I wonder what happened to Garrett. Is he fully dead? Or is he possessing something, like the puppet?
I hope the next movie is a prequel, maybe told retrospectively by Vanessa while some stuff happens in the present. And the third movie can be a sequel, maybe with older Abby being a guard herself.
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kuwdora · 10 months
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Star Wars audiobooks! I've been restless for new Star Wars since Andor ended. Been going through a handful of Disney era and Legends novels over the last few months. I have enough reactions to get down into an actual post. Mostly I'm just going to be foaming at the mouth over Marc Thompson and Sam Witwer's narration and falling over myself about the characters. I have listened to: Dark Disciple, Last Shot, Disney Thrawn trilogy, Heir to the Empire, Darth Maul: Shadow Hunter. Lots of these books I liked, some of them I didn't but the narration and characters are still amazing. Motherfucking MARA JADE. Asajj Ventress!!!!!!!! I have no rational mind about Maul and I am one of those feral stick figures chewing on Thrawn. Hnnghh.
First of all, let me start with Marc Thompson. He's been doing the audiobooks for years and years now. Here’s a great intro where he’s talking about the differences of doing character voices and learning the importance of bringing the right dynamic to the prose. He slips so seamlessly into his Star Wars voices reel, ahaha.
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Here is a really cute Lip Sync Battle where Marc Thompson will say a line and then have a fan lip sync the same line back at the camera. His energy, his energy I love it so much. Everyone is having SO MUCH FUN. There’s also a cameo by Star Wars author Christie Golden in this video. Super cute.
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First book:
Dark Disciple - Christie Golden Narrated by Marc Thompson
Alright I actually had picked this up ages go from my library and never read it but since I’ve been on an audiobook kick, Marc Thompson got me goin’ with alllll his voices.
I love Asajj Ventress so I was pretty much guaranteed to enjoy something from this book. Apparently it was written based on some unfinished scripts for an arc that would have happened if the show didn’t get cancelled. Knowing this makes a lot more sense with regards to the pacing and I think I would have preferred the animated episodic for this since I think a lot of the early Quinlan and Asajj stuff dragged a little too much. However I did appreciate getting more of a deeper dive in Asajj’s head and it really made me want to go digging through AO3 for some amazing character studies that I know must exist at this point.
But yeah, I didn’t think I’d enjoy the eventual romance between Asajj and Quinlan but Quinlan was such a perfect set-up for a fall from the Jedi Order. I think I’m just really easy when it comes to whumping the fuck out of Jedi with torture and their own emotional repression.
I was really into all the Dathomir scenes and the history of Asajj with her sisters being touched upon again and how she managed to not “go crazy from the dark side” because of the balance she found because she was a Nightsister.
A++ for Asajj having to go to Boba fucking Fett to mount a rescue mission inside a fake heist.
Really I think I’m just so easy for murdery women with a rage boner. Fuck Dooku.
Marc Thompson’s narration was a delight and I definitely would recommend this for anyone who enjoyed The Clone Wars series and wanted to get a little more Asajj screen time. Here’s a scene where someone pulled Clone Wars clips and put Dark Disciple audio underneath. Marc Thompson bringing incredible Dooku subservience and Sidious danger, hhhngh.
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7/10, would listen to again even though I'd rather see the finished episodes.
Last Shot (A Han and Lando Novel) - Daniel Jose Older Narrated by Marc Thompson, Daniel Jose Older and January LaVoy
This book was extremely disappointing. Normally I am a fan of seeing fan-favorites have their mid-life crises but I was extremely bored and over with Older’s take on Han having an existential crisis of who he was as a father an husband in this post-Empire world. Lando on the other hand, was having a crisis of genuinely having fallen in love and not knowing how to handle that. I fucking loved that.
This book had multiple timelines and jumped around a lot and I don’t know if I just wasn’t focused enough while listening but the timeline jumps were jarring and incomprehensible at times. The action plot ended up being rather unsatisfying.
It was also very jarring to have three narrators for the different timelines and I kind of feel bad because I went and looked and Older’s narration is just consistently getting panned across all reviewers—and for good reason. Thompson and LaVoy are experienced voice actors and with Older in the middle, Older just seems slapdash in his reading. If it was just Older all the way through I might have been more forgiving but going back and forth with everyone… it really was painful at times.
It was a slog to get through this book, really. What I actually really enjoyed was all the original characters: an Ewok slicer, a nonbinary hot shot pilot, and Lando’s love of his life whose name is slipping my mind even now, agh. I wasn’t fan of the villain character, unfortunately, and it was a bit of a letdown that the action plot was just… I don’t know, boring. It was a riff on transhumanism except with droids and a bit of droid supremacy to it and I was just... tired by it.
Marc Thompson was KILLING it tho. His performances always fucking delight me. January LaVoy’s narration of Lando and L-3 were also really great even though I just wasn’t into the scenes themselves.
3/10 - do not recommend, HOWEVER I would read fic about the lady ewok hacker Peekpa.
Darth Maul: Shadow hunter By Michael Reeves Narrated by SAM WITWER
I am, as the fannish parlance goes, Not Normal about Maul or Sam Witwer's performance as Maul.
This novel takes place just before the events of The Phantom Menace and it’s a Star Wars story that is very, very narrow in scope. The stakes are still very high because someone has gained information about the Trade Federation’s impending blockade and Sidious sends Maul to go and take care of it. The whole story takes place in the underbelly of Coruscant and I gotta say, it’s really refreshing after going through a bunch of Star Wars shows, books and films where it’s all galactic hopping whirlwind stuff to have that's in one place and happening in a short amount of time. I think it's something like 2 or 3 days that all the events happen.
Michael Reeves is a man of deep characterization and creates an amazing sense of place in the Black Sun alley of Corusant. We get very little Sidious and Maul interaction but what bits we do get are fascinating and haunting. I do like the ‘less is more’ approach here with these two...although I will say I’m not sure I would have picked up this book if I hadn’t gone through The Clone Wars and lost my goddamn mind over Sam Witwer’s portrayal of Maul.
And his performance here. In this book. I don’t know what it is about Witwer but when he does Maul my brain just lights up in a way that I haven’t really gotten outside of live theater performances. He brings this sense of ruthlessness and competence to Maul, his gleeful rage and oscillating mania as he ends up tracking an information broker and Jedi Padawan. Oh, Witwer is truly just. Fucking amazing, okay.
I would love this book even if it wasn’t Witwer narrating it but my god he elevates it to a whole new level. I got my copy from the library but it is immediately on my to-buy list once I can buy books again.
Michael Reeves also wrote for Batman the Animated series and Gargoyles which makes a whole lot of sense in the way he’s able to just create such lush sensory detail of place and people, oh holy fuck. He’s the writer who wrote the Gargoyles episode about Broadway accidentally shooting Elisa with her gun (this is an episode that got pulled from airing and I don’t think they have on Disney+ right now). Aw man, alright I definitely need to read more of his stuff now.
The action plot is Lorn Pavan is a down-on-his-luck fellow who got information he shouldn’t have and he is trying to sell it, Darsha the Jedi Padawan gets sent down to bring in a Black Sun informant and things go tits up for her in horrible ways. Darsha and Lorn’s paths collide and they try to survive Maul. I love everything about these characters, except for the end where Lorn started having romantic feelings about the Padawan. Blech.
Also somehow I think I-5 is now my second favorite droid character I’ve come across in the greater Star Wars canon (Chopper will always be my #1 grumpy cat droid). Witwer has the best dry delivery for the droid character. Like. It’s so fucking GOOD.
I’m also impossibly impressed and obsessed with Witwer’s performance of Sidious and the Jedi Council. His Qui-Gon is SO FUCKING GOOD. His Palaptine has my teeth rattling in my head oh my god.
Here’s the first 5 or so minutes of Shadow Hunter, hhnngh. You get Maul, Sidious a drunk Lorn Pavan, and my new droid bestie I-5:
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I am 100% going to be reading Michael Reeves’ other Star Wars novels. Apparently he has a series that follows a Jedi-in-hiding post-Order 66 and I want to just dunk my head in all the Star Wars noir, I guess, yes please.
10/10 - I love, would heartily recommend to anyone wanting a kind of story that’s more heavy on character and setting and also SAM WITWER!!!!!!!!! Maul. Hnnghghghgh.
TIMOTHY ZAHN TIME.
Thrawn Trilogy (Disney era) Thrawn, Thrawn Alliances, Thrawn Treason Narrated by Marc Thompson
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This was my second time through the Disney novels. I watched Star Wars Rebels first, then my friend jb_slasher told me about Thrawn having novels. I had vaguely heard of Heir to the Empire over the years and also my friend recommended the Disney trilogy so I figured I’d start with that since I was diving off from Disney canon anyway.
My god I love this trilogy so fuckin’ much. Marc Thompson out here nailing it. This Thrawn is the type of character who is always the smartest person in the room and I should get irritated by that like all the other characters but mmmm, I have a competence kink. And I am just over the moon with how he instills loyally and allegiance in his crew who can now have a commander who is not interested in politicking his way through things but actually is committed to strategy and whatnot.
Also fucking Zahn made Thrawn go back to space college. And gave him a little protege who he grew to admire. Eli Vanto is a great character, I am reading a lot of slash about them obviously but yeah, I loved seeing his growth throughout the trilogy. And THRAWN ALLIANCE. Y’all. Y’all. The Star Wars memes about Thrawn and Darth Vader and Anakin Skywalker are AMAZING and really do the hilarity so much justice. Here's a fantastic book trailer cut together with Marc Thompson' narration, hnngh.
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This man absolutely knows who Darth Vader is and Darth Vader is like “oh fuck no you don’t.” And when Thrawn had met Anakin during the Clone Wars and Anakin had to try and work together with him? Perfection. Bonus Padme getting to be a ridiculous and foolish badass when she goes looking for trouble. And also her also having a competence kink for Thrawn, too. It cracks me the fuck uuuuuup, okay.
Thrawn absolutely hates politics so fucking much and I love to see how that is the primary way he gets thwarted or has to build his strategy around. Because people are fucking assholes and political everywhere. Seriously, have I mentioned how much I love Marc Thompson??
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Thrawn Treason gave us more of Thrawn’s people and whatnot with the Chiss which I also liked but I’m really less interested in their motivations and experiences as a culture on the edge of the Empire. More here for Vanto now getting to be the fish-out-of-water and leveling up and getting all the respect he deserves.
MARC THOMPSON, y’all. He does a great Thrawn, an AMAZING whinybaby sycophant Ronan of the Starkiller Project, and his Eli Vanto Space Yokel intonation is 💋. Also I feel like the loyalty and trust that Thrawn earns from his subordinates really feeds into this praise kink thing that everyone develops by being around him. I love it.
10/10 will lose my mind and listen/read this trilogy again and also read all the fanfic about it.
Heir to the Empire Timothy Zahn
I am sorry it took me 30 years to get here but I AM NOW HERE FOR MARA JADE’S RAGE BONER. Let me repeat: MARA. JADE. !!!!!!!!!
Also holy fuck. Luke Skywalker getting to be smart, technically creative and able to navigate through terrible situations in spite of a Force-Blocking Macguffin is AMAZING. I was not expecting to be this into a post-Empire Luke but I really fucking loved it.
I also love all of the Han and Lando scenes in this (WAY MORE than Last Shot, sorry Daniel Jose Older).
Leia and Chewie!! On Kashyyk!! Talon Karrde was so great (Thompson made him kind of sound like Antonio Banderas??)
Thrawn and his bestie Pelleaon! What a fascinating dynamic.
I actually was not very into Thrawn’s vibes in this book as much as I was in the Disney stuff. I don’t know if it’s because of the vibes they wrote him in Star Wars rebels that got filtered back into Zahn’s take on him for the books (or if it was the other way around?) - Like, the calculating tactical and man of strategy is still there, but… hm, I’ve been struggling to articulate what about it that didn’t tickle me as much. He’s still playing the long game in every situation but I don’t know… I think there’s this more pragmatic view of people he has in the Disney books that he doesn’t get here in the first of this trilogy. I haven’t gotten to the other two books from this series yet so maybe I’ll feel differently later. The anniversary edition of the audiobook that I got from my library was narrated by Marc Thompson and he (you'll be so surprised) fucking nailed it all for me. Love love love.
10/10 timothy zahn, I love you. You got an amazing way of writing action. I gotta read more of your stuff. Anyway, I'm also starting the Ahsoka novella that I think (??) is not quite canon anymore since they got a final season for Clone Wars, but it's by E.K. Johnston and narrated by Ahoska's voice actor Ashley Eckstein. Don't have enough thoughts about it yet but I love Ahsoka so I'm sure I'll have a decent time.
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danger-xylophones · 1 year
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Mand'alor's Gambit Part 5
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warnings: references to murder, prison environment, reader gets a villain (antihero?) arc, Satine, references to a tragedy, shit ton of poorly translated mando'a
Shoutout to @cinlat whose wonderful characterization of Balic Cormac and OC Fynta Wolfe birthed a new oc of mine who shows up later. If you are at all a fan of SWTOR, I recommend reading Family is More Than Blood. It is truly a work of art and I'm always so thoroughly entertained reading it.
masterlist
<- part 4
.............................................
You better just fix your posture
And every hero needs his theme song, so
Who in here tryna start a riot?
...............................................
Sundari prison was huge. Somehow bigger than your child mind had remembered. Which, in all fairness, wasn't so impossible - you'd only visited three times after Dereth's initial incarceration. Once to confirm his sentence, one other to gloat over your new control in Dion. And once when Almec was imprisoned. You weren't intimidated by the sheer monolith that the prison was per se, but you did take a moment to take it all in which caught the attention of Maul.
"Are you alright, Governor?" He asked, head tilting forward towards you. His hands, as always were perfectly clasped behind his back.
With a shake of your head, you placed your helmet on while you answer. "Fine, I'm fine, Lord Maul. Merely observing the child mind's ability to warp images."
"I take it the prison is not how you remember it?" His voice hid a chuckle that you didn't appreciate.
"I have not been to the prison since I was a little girl." You huffed as you approached the entrance. "It is most certainly not like how I remember it." The guards puffed up at your approach until you raised a hand and bowed in the direction of Maul who came to a stop next to you. He waved the guards away and entered.
The inside of the prison was, for better or worse, exactly like you remembered. Cold and bleak, the cells awash in gross florescent lighting. Guards patrolled every level, only away from particular sections for a few seconds before another guard took up post. It was disheartening merely entering the building. You could only imagine what it would be like to be imprisoned here.
Maul made a humming noise in the back of his throat as he looked around. He seemed disinterested, maybe even bored with the place already. His gaze settled on one particular cell across from you, tucked into the corner. "They are yet to repair mine and Savage's cell."
You turned to him, aware that although he couldn't see your face he could probably sense your confusion. "You were imprisoned here?"
Maul's attention turned to you. "Courtesy of Pre Viszla. We were not here for very long." He hummed again. "Your father was here as well, we broke him out."
"Almec mentioned that you were the ones to rescue him - he didn't tell me you were also prisoners at the time."
"An oversight, but not a detrimental one." Maul turned away, taking a step in the opposite direction of where you knew Dereth and Satine to be. "Now, I will leave you to your devices - I am rather intrigued by the security measures here. Or, instead, disappointed in the lack of them."
You ignored the dig at the security, it wasn't remotely your concern anyways. "Very well, I will meet you here when I am done."
With a brief huff of 'acceptable' he stalked away. You didn't wait long before heading off yourself.
Satine's cell was first. You found the former duchess laying on the poor excuse of a bench offered in the cell. She was on her back, her hands were perfectly folded over her stomach, and hair laid out like a halo and draping down the bench to just barely brush the floor. Despite everything, she was still the picturesque image of what a duchess should look like - put together and serene. With a clearing of your throat, you addressed her. "Duchess Satine?"
Her eyes snapped open, clearly startled by the address but she recovered quickly enough. Sitting up, she turned to you. "I am she." She answered in a placid tone. But you caught the underlying skepticism.
With a deep breath, you reached up to remove your helmet and perched the object on your hip. "I am Governor Dion of Concordia. I've come to have a chat," You used your free hand to tap just above where the armor cam was hidden on your chest, "with you on behalf of both Clan Dion and Concordia and her sisters."
Her bright blue eyes stayed fixed on the cam for a moment before slowly sliding up to your face, a harsh, bitter edge you had never seen from her before overtook her calm expression. "I'm afraid we have very little to talk about, Governor, on account of your master."
Your eyebrow twitched at the thought of Maul in such a position but you kept your tongue. "The only 'master' I serve is Mandalore itself and her interests."
"Yet you have thrown your lot in with the sith."
"Ni aranar Manda'yaim." You emphasized once more.
Satine faltered for a moment, the harsh edge of her voice falling away to return to the calmer tone you associated with the duchess. "I see. So, what did you want to talk to me about, Governor?"
"Yesterday I received an alert from my advisor that someone attempted to gain access to Concordia's financials. Using an outdated code." You raised an eyebrow at her. "Would you know anything about that?"
"No, I am allowed no access to the outside world right now."
"But, you knew I'd allied with Maul? I made no formal, public declaration."
"Gossip becomes quite the commodity when there is little else to entertain." Satine sighed pointedly. "Plus with Almec's release, I knew it was only a matter of time until Clan Dion took a stand."
"It's unfortunate we've become that predictable." You snorted scornfully. "Regardless, do you know of anyone else besides you who would have access to the Sundari code?"
She made a face that told you she was seriously considering the question. "The only others I would know of are Almec, yourself, and Pre Vizsla."
That's what I was afraid of. You grimaced. If Vizsla had at all been like you, that meant he'd shared the code with his closest confidants. And one of those confidants was currently unaccounted for. Refocusing your gaze on Satine, you spoke again."Thank you, Duchess. You've been very helpful." With a performative glance over your shoulder, you lowered your voice to speak with her further. "On another note, how is your sister? I heard she and the Night Owls escaped the palace when Maul took over."
Satine's face fell. "As I said, Governor, I have had no access with the outside since my imprisonment." But, there was just the faintest glimmer of hope. "But, I am grateful to know she did truly escape. Thank you."
"Of course. It is a small comfort, I know."
"But one that is greatly appreciated. We never got along, but I still worry for her." Satine fell silent and you didn't know what to say following that. Luckily for you, Satine brokered an entirely new topic. "If I may ask," she began hesitantly, standing up from her bench to approach the cell door and you in turn, "will you help me?"
Your shock must have been clear on your face. The former duchess scrambled to elaborate, her voice pitched low and frantic. "Maul will destroy our planet and shatter the peace we've worked so hard to maintain, Governor. He must be stopped." When you didn't respond, she continued. "I don't have a plan yet but I need to contact the Jedi. There's a knight, his name's Obi-Wan Kenobi, he can help us."
Now, that name was familiar to you. He was the one responsible, albeit indirectly, for your takeover of Concordia. By ousting Pre Vizsla, him and the duchess left a void not only in the leadership of Concordia but in the thousands of other moons and asteroids that fell under its jurisdiction as a neutral province. A void which you happily filled. "Duchess Satine, I-" what could you even say?
"Please, Governor. I am just like you - I only wish to protect Mandalore and her people." Satine pleaded again.
You took a step back and became aware of the armor protecting your body. Of the blood soaked into the durasteel that would only be replenished as the centuries continued...if Satine never regained power. Under her rule, you'd been forced to play the part of a politician, parading around in finery too flimsy for your liking, let alone the inherited warrior spirit of your people. Your armor, your second skin, had to be discarded in order for your people to live.
Dion had suffered under her rule, losing millions of credits worth of export due to her staunch neutrality and refusal to let your people return to the family business. You'd almost been absorbed by Death Watch when the Vizslas offered sanctuary for your family. And that had been a whole different type of battle. She wasn't like you. She didn't care about her people or how they suffered in favor of her idealism. She cared only about her pacifism.
"I'm afraid you are mistaken, Kryze." You took another step back as her face fell completely. "Ni aranar Manda'yaim." You placed your helmet back on. "Ib'tuur jatne tuur ash'ad kyr'amur." You walked away, ignoring the angry insults hurled at your back by the former duchess.
One interrogation down, one more to go.
Dereth's cell was sixteen levels down where the guards patrolled less frequently. Which would have been worrying if not for the fact he'd been in the prison for nearly 10 years now and never bothered to try an escape. Except for once during that odd stint with the Black Sun and Pykes making a half-ass attempt at invasion. But, several other prisoners had also made an escape attempt so you didn't hold that against him. As the lift slowed, you braced yourself. You hadn't seen Dereth in years - the last time was when you came by to explain that you were now the matriarch of Clan Dion after the unfortunate passing of your mother.
Dereth was quietly reading something on a modified datapad when you finally got to him. His hair, which was shaved to skin when he was first incarcerated was now down to just above his mid back. Dark brown locks done up in a pretty elaborate braid considering the finite styling tools he had on hand. His eyesight had evidently worsened, quite drastically too, going by the new presence of cheap looking frames perched on his nose.
Bracing yourself you approached the cell and lightly tapped your fist against the transparisteel. His head snapped up in an instant, an easy smile on his face that grew just that much wider upon recognizing you. "Well, " He chortled as he used his index finger to push his glasses back on his crooked nose. "su cuy'gar ori'vod."
"The same to you." You leaned against the door frame, helmet angled towards the man. "I see you're doing well."
"Given the circumstances." He huffed, waving a nonchalant hand around the small cell. "Let's not waste time; you didn't trek all the way from Concordia just to exchange pleasantries." The man sat up, conveying a restrained interest. "What do you want?"
With a grim hum in your throat, you voiced the thing you didn't want to admit. "Your opinion."
If he was surprised, he hid it well. Instead of any wide-eyed stare or gaping maw, his face changed very little - the only tell being a little twitch of his lips. "An odd request, but one I'm happy to oblige, vod."
Bowing your head, you lifted your hands to remove your helmet and hold it against your hip just as you had earlier. "What do you know of the recent changes in our...political front?"
Dereth angled his gaze to the ceiling as if waiting for the dull white tiles to give him the latest scoop. It seemed to work as soon his gaze was returned to you. "Satine's deposed, Pre Vizsla took over, something happened afterwards and no one knows what."
You nodded. "Mostly true. Kryze's detained here, Vizsla did take over but not for very long."
"So, who's the new mand'alor - you?" He chuckled and you had to huff out a laugh with him.
"No, an outsider. Darth Maul."
"Dar'jetti?" Dereth's eyes were blown wide now, all former decorum wiped from his face. "How the hell did that happen?" You gave him am unimpressed look. He nodded in understanding. "So, what do you need my opinion for?"
A deep breath in, "Do you think Dion is strong enough to rule Manda'yaim?"
Dereth was quiet for a very long time, rounded face twisted in thought so potent you doubted anything short of a mortar shell would shake him out of it. His hand rose up to pinch and rub at his nose, easing over the crook that had formed after being broken so many times and never healing properly. And when that gesture didn't give him any answers, he switched to massaging at his hands and up his arms. You watched in mild fascination as the patches of light and dark skin stretched and moved with the motions.
Finally he spoke. "Not right now. If we built up stronger warriors, had more numbers on our side..."
"I was afraid of that." You sighed. "Death Watch has abandoned us. We are once again a standalone clan."
"Are we not allied with the mand'alor?"
"We are." You conceded. "But he is sith. I'm worried what will become of Mandalore when the Republic finds out. Will we not go down with him?"
"I see." Dereth sighed. "Do you have a plan?"
That made you pause. Did you? Yes...and no. You would have to stick to your guns, work with Maul as best you could while siphoning power away from him and solely to you. But you had to do it in a way that made it seem like it was going back to him. Which was a hell of a lot harder to do in person. "The beginnings of one. I'll play it by ear." Dereth muttered something under his breath that you didn't quite catch but weren't bothered enough to have him repeat it. You chanced a glance at a nearby chrone and realized you were encroaching on an hour and a half spent talking to your two conversation partners. "I have to go." You turned away, prepared to leave without another word. If not for the soft, almost desperate call of your name.
"Ori'vod, wait, how's Chara?" You paused, debating if you should answer. But Dereth had been kind to you and allowed your questions. It was fair to allow his.
"She's fine." You turned back to him. "A bit preoccupied with running Concordia while I'm stuck in Sundari so we haven't spoken much recently." You met his eyes again. "She married." You broke the news to him quick. "Almeris snatched her up."
"Osik" he huffed under his breath. Your heart clenched in sympathy. Had things gone differently... "Vod..." Dereth's voice was soft, almost delicate as he called for your attention once again. "I didn't mean to kill him."
You placed your helmet on once more, "I know."
"She was destroying Dion."
You bowed your head, "I know...ret'urcye mhi." and walked away.
..............................
Maul was waiting for you when you arrived back at the entrance. There was no way of telling how long, he'd been waiting but going by the expression on his face (bored and grumpier than usual) it'd been just long enough to annoy him.
Squaring your shoulders, you approached, bringing his attention to you.
"Ah," he straightened his spine, arms falling behind him again, "I trust your meetings went well?" Maul's gaze was intense, boring into your eyes through the visor of your helmet.
Nodding, you took you place beside him. "Yes, they were...enlightening." You hummed in a tone far more pleasant than the nature of the conversations allowed. But Maul didn't seem to mind it. In fact, he almost seemed to enjoyed it.
His lips curled back, revealing sharp, stained teeth that almost glinted in the fluorescent lights of the prison. You supposed it was his version of a smile. "Good." Maul flicked his head away from you, turning his attention to the guard at his side. Although you couldn't see what passed between them, you understood that it had to do with your departure from the prison. Maul then turned and made his way to the elevator that would bring you out. You followed more slowly, lingering just a moment in the tense atmosphere of the prison.
And then you were alone with Maul once more. "So, what did you learn, Governor?" Instead of letting silence descend, Maul turned to you with his hands folded behind him.
Rolling your shoulders to move the weight of the armor around, you spoke carefully. "Satine was not the one behind the message." You started, sorting through information relevant to him. "And unfortunately, that leaves us back at square one."
"How so?" He asked with a tilt of his head.
"Ruling her out only confirmed my initial suspicions that the Night Owls are our most likely suspects."
"And there are no others you can think of?" Maul pressed, leaning towards you almost imperceptibly.
"Only Pre Vizsla. But I was under the impression you...took care of him." You picked your words carefully and watched for any adverse reaction from the sith. The most you got was a frown. "And Almec but he's already your servant as I am. He would have no need to go behind my back to get our records."
"Interesting..." Maul hummed quietly. No further conversation followed, not even after you'd both stepped back into the skycar that would take you back to the palace. But you couldn't help but feel on edge. Not because of the silence, but due to some nameless fear you couldn't place. The silence of the ride back was broken by the shrill chirp of your wrist com.
Without hesitating you keyed it on. "Governor Dion spea-"
"Alor!" A masculine voice yelled from the speaker.
"Almeris?" Alarm bells started to ring in your head. Almeris never commed you. "What's happening, where's Chara?"
"Fine, for now." He gritted out and you thought you could hear blaster fire in the background. "She's busy getting everyone out."
"Almeris, what's happening?" You emphasized, free hand involuntarily gripping at the leather of your seat hard enough to tear through it.
Silence and then, "One of the outposts was attacked - CF-8879dE. We don't know who it was or what they used but the whole thing went up in flames in a matter of seconds." Silence again. "They've retreated. Didn't get a good look at the armor."
"Were they mando?" You hissed into your wrist, all too aware that Maul was watching intently.
Almeris sighed over the comm. "No clue. Besbe didn't look like beskar."
An agitated sigh slipped past your lips as your free hand reached up to pinch the bridge of your nose. "Fantastic." You huffed. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Maul moving closer to you. Warily, you lowered your wrist in order to ask him what he was doing.
But before you could, he had reached out and keyed your wrist com on himself and brought it towards him. "Almeris, was it?" Maul asked into your wrist. You were left just staring at the side of his face, unsure whether to pull your arm away or not. "This is Lord Maul."
Almeris was silent for a long time. "Lord Maul?" He finally asked in a disbelieving voice.
"Yes, Almeris, cuun mand'alor cuyir darjetii." You scrambled to explain before he could say anything stupid.
"Ni haa'taylir." He huffed through the com and you could just imagine the skeptical look behind his helmet. "Tion'jor vaabir vi naritir laam ti cuun aru'e?"
Curse his traditionalism - judging by the eyebrow Maul had raised at you, it was about to get you both killed. "Cuy ogir'olar, dikut." You hissed. "Lord Maul," you emphasized, "you were saying?"
The eyebrow lowered but he maintained a skeptical look. "Almeris, am I correct in assuming you are a member of Clan Dion?"
"Yes, Lord Maul." Almeris bit out.
"What is your relation to Governor Dion?" Maul asked with a tilt of his head.
You could hear the hesitance in his voice as Almeris answered. "I'm her cousin." A cough. "Our grandfathers were brothers...I'm sorry, how is this relevant?"
Frowning you tried to tug your arm out of Maul's gasp. "I would have to agree, Maul. Can you please table this for later so I can get back to my people?"
Maul stared at you for a long moment, the look on his face completely unreadable. But, he relented with a cordial bow of his head. "Thank you," you raised your arm again, "Almeris, are you still there?"
"Yes, I am. Can't really go anywhere at the moment." The Dion warrior grumbled.
"Good, can you tell Chara I need to talk to her?" A flash of light outside the window caught your attention and you realized it was the reflection of the car in one of the windows of the palace. "As soon as she's available?"
"Yes, of course. She's checking on the survivors right now."
Your blood froze. "Do we have confirmed casualties?"
"Just one so far but not everyone's accounted for..."
"Shit." You couldn't help but swear. Shit, shit, shit. Of course this happens the one time you're off of Concordia for an extended amount of time.
"Governor." A low voice spoke into your ear, startling you out of the spiral you'd started to fall into. You looked up to find Maul looking at, one of his hands hovering just above touching your shoulder. "We have landed."
"Uh..." You shook your head as if it would clear your racing thoughts. "Tha-thank you." With a worrying shake, you raised your arm once more. "Almeris, are you still there?"
"Yes, vod." His voice was much gentler. "What do you need?"
"Tell Chara I will be on the first shuttle to Concordia I can get on. No statement is to be offered but the victims are allowed to shelter in the palace if they so wish or have no where else to go. I want a full investigation up and running by the time I'm back. Do you understand?" You rushed out, trying to force a plan to form as you spoke.
"I understand, alor. Take care." He spoke quietly before signing off, leaving you stuck on Mandalore. Shit.
The door closest to you suddenly opened, scaring the living daylights out of you. Reflexively, you brought your arm up in a defensive position. Only to slowly lower it at the sight of Maul. Without saying a word, he reached out a hand for you to take. "I contacted Savage, he has ordered some of the servants to pack your bags. A shuttle has also been hailed. I will accompany you to the hangar where Savage will meet us with our bags."
You started to nod, not really processing what he was saying as you settled you hand in his to let him help you out of the car. But just as you were settling your helmet on your head again to hide the panicked expression threatening to overtake your expression, you registered what Maul had said. "I'm sorry," you started, stopping in your tracks to bring him to a halt as well, "our bags?"
Maul nodded once, his expression placid. "Of course, Governor." He turned away and started walking again. "A problem on Concordia, is a problem on Mandalore."
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Translations:
Aranar - Defend
Cuun - our
cuyir - is/are
Cuy ogir'olar - it's irrelevant
Besbe - kit
Dar'jetti- Sith
Dikut - idiot
haa'taylir - to see
Ib'tuur jatne tuur ash'ad kyr'amur - Today is a good day for someone else to die
Manda'yaim - Mandalore
Ni - I
Ori'vod - [older] brother, sister, special friend
Osik - shit
Ret'urcye mhi - good bye, maybe we'll meet again
su cuy'gar - hello, you're not dead
Tion'jor vaabir vi naritir laam ti cuun aru'e - why do we put up with our enemy?
vod - brother, sister, comrade
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Fire and Darkness
The Chosen One.
The Dark One.
Face to face at last.
For years, The Dark Ones ruled. And nights were spent cowering in fear because of them. 
Now, it was time.
The Chosen One was here.
Prophecized to defeat The Dark Ones once and for all.
Trained for years in magic, weapons, brains, and brawn.
Trained to bring an end to the darkness. 
Trained to become the perfect warrior.
The perfect machine for peace.
"What's your name, oh, Great Chosen One? Fire Heart?"
"Fire Star."
"Hmm, is that really the best they could come up with?" The Dark One asked, their smile mischievous but only a fool would let their guard down around them. 
At no response from The Chosen One, they made an effort to shrug, "No matter. I'm sure they must have told you all about me."
Fire Star didn't answer.
"I'm one of The Dark Ones. The Dark One as far as you know." Their eyes narrowed and they took out their swords. "You can call me Villain." 
At still no answer from their opponent, they let out a battle cry and charged.
---
The Dark One took a step forward, their arms full, then… they got down on one knee.
A peculiarly shaped black box in one hand, clasped to their chest where their heart would be.
Their other hand around a single blood red rose, gentle enough to not to break its thin stem.
Fire Star didn’t move.
They didn’t flinch, but they didn’t know what to think.
Villain took a deep breath and looked up.
And they couldn't speak.
Every second that passed on in silence, Fire Star just grew angrier... and more on edge.
Meanwhile, Villain felt like their chest was about to close in on itself, making it harder and harder to breathe.
This wasn't how Dark Ones acted; this wasn't how Dark Ones should act, thought Fire Star. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong.
Villain could see their opponent straining their ears and eyes, to get an inkling, a clue, of an ambush or attack. 
But there was nothing.
Only distant meows and car horns, and the flickering of a single lamp post down the street if you were desperate.
And, despite being two of the most powerful beings in the city, both of them radiated desperation right now.
Villain, struggling to breathe, struggling to get their words out, struggling to break the silence.
And Fire Star, struggling to gain control — or keep it if they had it already — they hated that they couldn't tell.
Villain gulped and took another breath.
Fire Star tightened their hand around their weapons. "Speak. Before I decide to silence you for good."
That knocked some sense into them, Fire Star thought, because they finally spoke. 
“Fire Star,” Villain’s voice was hoarse, nervous tremble evident. “Fire Star. I think… I think… You were sent to end me, but then you didn't and I thought you were a pathetic spineless do-gooder like all the others."
Fire Star didn’t say a word.
Villain continued, “And then. Then you- you took that hush money. I thought that was it, the defeat of the so-called Chosen One. Corrupted by the root of all evils. Such a fitting end.”
Fire Star looked bored, but they didn’t interrupt. They wanted to know where this was going.
“And then. Gosh, Fire Star, when you didn’t even flinch when I threatened to drop that sleazebag mayor off that building. And when you didn't flinch when I actually dropped them," Villain’s eyes were sparkling, their face was in awe. "I knew you were something.”
“I distinctly remember pushing you off that building too.”
“Yes! Exactly! All those heroes, they have their moral code, but you. You... wow.”
“I’m not a hero.”
“No, you're definitely not. You pushed me off. You wanted to kill me and you made good on your word and you did almost kill me. I never thought you would do that. It was terrifying…"
"I'm failing to see the point here."
"Fire Star. You have robbed me, mauled me, left me bloody and bruised. You have attempted to kill me multiple times. You use whatever means to get what you want, be it murder, blackmail, magic, science. You don't mess around. If you want something, you take it.
"Fire Star. What I'm trying to say is... You’re unhinged. You’re terrifying. But every time you stab someone, I- I just want to kiss you even more.” Now that got a surprised eyebrow raise from Fire Star, but Villain continued. “I think I love you. I think I’m in love with you, Fire Star."
"... What?" Fire Star’s poker face was good.
“I can’t believe it either. I… I’ve never felt this way before. I think I'm in love with you, and- and- and I don't know what to do anymore."
Villain could almost hear the gears in Fire Star's head turning. Would they believe them? Would they try to kill them?
Then, in what felt like an eternity, the silence of the rooftop was replaced with the sound of laughter. Honest, unrestrained, crazed, manic, melodic laughter. 
Absolute perfection. Villain could listen to that laugh all day.
"Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh," they had to hold their knees for support, "Oh, gosh! Seriously?" Their weapons never left their hands. "I hadn't pegged you for the type to fall in love. I was thinking of angles, researching, trying to figure your actions out. But we both lost. You fell in love and I didn't even think of… that being your reason." 
Villain's heart was thumping erratically while Fire Star continued laughing, losing their breath, and their balance — they had never seen them this carefree, they had never looked so happy. Villain had never seen them smile before. 
And for good reason. Fire Star had been raised a machine, at the cost of breaking them and their humanity.
They had never been this free. 
But Villain, The Dark One, had just done the most human thing in both of their dark lives.
They had made them laugh.
The Chosen One.
The Dark One.
Human at last.
Fin 🖤
---
A/N:
For Villaintine’s Day 2023 by @black-rose-events
Pairing: Chosen one hero-turned-villain x My choice
"...What?"
Dialogue: Replies to "I love you":
"I hadn't pegged you for the type to fall in love. I was thinking of angles, researching, trying to figure your actions out. But we both lost. You fell in love and I didn't even think of that being your reason."
Finishing touch: Blood red rose
Also used this prompt by @mysticallilac: (Your prompt was inspiring, thank you so much!)
"Every time you stab someone, I want to kiss you even more."
Thank you @surplus-of-sarcasm for your help!
A/N: I tried to practice writing✨dark✨ this time :) Then I had trouble with the ending because I didn't know how to end it without feeling bad. I forced myself to somehow get something and ended up with this :)
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I love the jedi but enjoy the sith, mostly vader,new republic sith and old republic sith, do yoi have a lost of your favorite star wars villains.
In order, Dooku, Thrawn, Palpatine, Vader, OT-era Tarkin, Maul - and TCW!Hondo right after Dooku if that counts.
Pretty vanilla lmao. I like the Son as a concept but he's really not hardcore enough to really embody what he's supposed to represent. (There's not enough of the slimy slithering madness and viciousness that makes the Sith do stuff like sacrifice Jedi on altars and do blood magic rituals, among other things.) He's too tame for something supposedly worse than the Sith, though he'd be horrifying if he'd been more Dark-Side-y.
So, Dooku, because he's a disaster and a mirror to Anakin's garbage and because there's a lot of genuinely interesting things about a character who was among the wisest and noblest and who knows what the darkness is and willing embraces it anyway. he's Star Wars' Saruman and I love Saruman. It certainly helped that he was played by Sir Christopher Lee. The man was just that good.
Thrawn, because of the smooth, calm demeanor - much like Dooku's. That scene where he slowly explains what a kalikori is without revealing right away who is Hera, toying with us with his incredible score in the background, gave me shivers the first 4-5 times I watched it. I love sophisticated and collected villains. Brutish villains feel too simplistic and not nearly as frightening. I also love Star Wars aliens.
Palpatine because he's a delight to hate. He has no redeeming qualities whatsoever - he's just absolute selfishness embodied and that makes if very fun. Also love the 'frail' old man whose power is in his insidiousness. I love how maniacally happy about his plans he always is and I love to think of how completely bored he must have been during the Empire days, before Luke showed up and gave him something to plot about. Sure I wish the Zillo beast could have flattened him to a Sheev pancake - or that Dooku would have just punted him into the sun before Naboo, but hey, at least he got thrown down a reactor and exploded twice and was never ever heard of again, right?
Vader because he's a powerhouse and that's always impressive. James Earl Jones' voice was always magnificent as well and there's something so expressive about faceless characters.
OT Tarkin because- smooth, calm and collected old villain. I really have a type ah ah. There's something so maddening about that complete confidence that they're right, that end-justify-the-means mentality they confuse for wisdom, that dismissive way they see the hot blooded righteous heroes as so beneath them...
Maul mostly for the times he goes completely crazy and either turns into a spider or a Temple-dwelling Sith cockroach and runs around painting Kenobi on the walls with his blood. I love his arc with Obi-Wan, I love what it says about the light and the Dark, the Jedi and the Sith, and the Florrum and Twin Suns duels are my favorite ever.
Finally, Hondo... Well, is Hondo. Much smarter, much more ruthless, and much saner than people give him credit for - just spectacularly greedy and ballsy. I wouldn't call him a villain so much as the true example of what a 'morally gray' character is. It's not good guys in impossible situations like Mace, it's not complex villains like Dooku, it's not the image people have of a tortured prince of darkness that deep down feels really sad about all the murder he's doing and it's not the selfless hero who angsts about quickly killing a monster that one time - it's Hondo.
I'm generally pretty indifferent to Ventress, Jango, Boba, bounty hunters like Cad Bane, the Hutts, villains of an episode, or more minor villains and/or reformed antagonists like Bo-Katan, Kallus, etc - as characters anyway. I might like them when they're onscreen or like their place in the story but they don't do much for me individually beyond that.
And a special mention goes to Miraj Scintel - the Zygerrian Queen and only Star Wars villain I truly and deeply loathe. I hate seeing her onscreen, I hate hearing her talk, I hate watching her move, I hate her aspirations, I just detest her. Everything about her is infuriating.
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blackkatmagic · 2 years
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I shall take the leap and ask for 4, if it hasn't been done? If not then uhhh 12?
I'm going to answer these in reverse order, but:
12. Is there an episode above all others that inspires you just a little bit more?
Hmm. I would say probably Monster, because it spawned....all of rwlf and a bunch of other fics regarding Savage and Feral and Maul.
4. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?
I currently have 19 docs open in word, so that's what I'm going to count here. 2 of them are posted WIPs that should be updated sometime this week, while the rest are random bits of ideas that I'm playing with. For a snippet:
Maedhros wakes in a darkness without stars, a heavy chain around his throat, a crown like cold iron around his brow.
He thinks, in the first moment, that he’s been consigned to the pits of Angband, lightless and hot. It’s too cold for Melkor’s fortress, though; Maedhros’s scars ache, and his breath gusts white like there's frost in his lungs. He curls in on himself, covered only by his hair, and grasps for the collar that’s tight around neck.
It’s no collar, though, but a thin chain. A thin chain that slips through his fingers with the coolness of water, and makes the bright stone hung from it slide against his collarbone as pure starlight shines in the dark.
Breath tangling in his throat, Maedhros freezes. He swallows hard, but the beat of the oath doesn’t rise in his heart, doesn’t drive him on like madness. The Silmaril glows in the darkness, the light of the Two Trees undimmed even here, and Maedhros holds his breath, lets his fingers slide down the chain—
Jerks them away with a cry, skin burning with the heat of the flames he flung himself into, as the Silmaril’s light brightens like a warning.
Desperate, quick, Maedhros fumbles for the chain, tries to jerk it over his head. It’s too tight, though, won't come free, and he wrenches at it until it cuts at his skin but can't find a way to break it. The Silmaril sears his skin whenever it touches, and finally, finally Maedhros curls forward, letting it swing free, and closes his eyes against the light of his father’s doom.
“I bore you to the heart of the earth,” he tells it, ragged. “I threw you far from me. Why still do you haunt me?”
There's no answer, not even the echo of his own voice. The Silmaril hangs, gleaming, and still Maedhros isn't worthy of it, still the jewel is nothing meant for his foul hands, but it hangs around his throat like a hangman’s noose regardless.
And then, quiet, there's a step, a shift in the darkness.
Maedhros raises his head, slow, the weight on his brow seeming an impossible thing. The darkness stretches, nothing Elven eyes can see through, but he hears the faintest brush of leather and cloth and metal, hidden away by the shadows.
Too cold for Angband, he thinks grimly, and curls his hand around his other wrist, the stump of his severed hand aching in the cold. He isn't strung up from a mountain, either, left to the mercy of someone who should have no mercy left for him or his family.
“Who are you?” he asks, and wants to rise, but—his skin still stings from the burn of the Silmaril, and he crushes down the urge.
There's no answer, just a pause, as though his watcher wasn’t expecting to have been seen. The silence stretches, more complete, and Maedhros closes his eyes for a long second.
He isn't chained, he thinks, and carefully, gingerly gets his feet beneath himself. The jewel bumps against his collarbone, burns, and Maedhros winces but doesn’t waver.
“Am I not to know the name of the one who holds me?” he asks. “Or the location where I am held?”
The silence stretches, stretches, and then finally there's a breath.
“You are on a ship,” a low, rough voice says, and cloth drags over leather. Light comes up, a wash of painful and artificial brilliance, and Maedhros half-raises a hand to block it before he realizes the gesture is entirely futile. The light is all around, and in its glow he can finally see the bare metal that stretches out, the blue glow of a barrier bright and steady. He’s in a cell, twelve paces in either direction, and everything is polished metal and harsh, empty space, the hum of a hyperdrive loud in his bones.
Just outside the cell is a sentient, tall and horned, with skin marked yellow and black. He wears an armor Maedhros doesn’t know, and his eyes are gold and dark and wary as he watches Maedhros as though expecting an attack.
“You look to be a Zabrak,” Maedhros says after a moment. “But no Zabrak I know.”
The man frowns, just slightly. “A Nightbrother,” he says harshly. “From Dathomir.”
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roguelibrarian · 1 year
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First sentences game!
tagged by @altschmerzes (thanks bro!!!)
Rules: share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written less than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway.
I've decided to steal altschmerzes' idea and only use WIPs that I haven't posted because I think that's more fun. Also keep in mind, these are all unpublished WIPs, so almost none of what you're about to see has been edited.
As for tagging...hoo boy, do I even know 10 fic writers anymore who Gav didn't also tag? I'm not sure I do, so if you see this and want to participate, you can go ahead and say I tagged you.
Putting the rest of this under a cut so it doesn't eat up anyone's entire dash.
1. untitled Kept from the Light sequel/finale
Obi-Wan drained the last dregs of caf from his cup before setting it down with a heavy sigh.  Weariness tugging at his eyelids, he poured himself another cup and drained nearly half of it in one gulp.  Sleep hadn’t come back easily after he’d woken in a cold sweat from a dream about Anakin. About the massacre. It was a string of images and memories.  Caleb Dume’s terrified face as he told the Council what he’d seen.  Anakin’s eyes, wild with anger, as he fought to the bitter end against the Jedi tasked with bringing him in.  The twelve bodies laid out, awaiting their funerals.  Six of them impossibly small. Caf wasn’t going to fix this.
2. untitled main fic in my Across the Stars series, also known as the Starkiller Leia AU
Starkiller was bored. In theory, she was above things like boredom.  In theory, she spent every waking moment training, preparing for her next mission. In theory. In practice, she was kriffing bored.
3. Duel of the Dads, my "crack treated seriously" fic in which Kanan and Ezra need to team up with both Maul and Hondo and it's about as stressful as you would expect
Warmth and softness surrounded him on all sides, a cocoon of safety and love.  It felt like…home.  Smelled like it, too, now that he thought about it.  And the soft hum floating to his ears sounded almost like his parents’ voices when they were too far away for him to hear exactly what they were saying. Ezra opened his eyes, blinking in confusion as he took in his surroundings.  He was home.  This was his parents’ house, his childhood bedroom, looking exactly as it had the last morning he woke up here.  Before everything fell apart. Slowly, he stood, his throat tightening as he got a better look at the room.  Deep down, he knew this shouldn’t be possible, but for a moment, he let himself not care.  He’d thought he would never see this place again, and he was going to let himself bask in it as long as he could. No sooner had the thought entered his mind when something shifted.  The air suddenly felt colder, and the drone of his parents’ voices vanished.  There was something wrong; some sticky, clinging feeling that crawled up his spine and burrowed its way into his bones.
4. the untitled deep cover agent AU, also known as extreme gaslighting: amnesia edition
A-wing interceptors had long since become synonymous with the Rebellion.  Each and every one of them may as well have had the Starbird painted on their hulls.  Those who piloted them were feared, admired, avoided, or shot down on sight depending on the planet.  And so, as the small ship dropped out of hyperspace above Coruscant’s atmosphere, Ezra knew it wouldn’t be long before Imperial forces moved to intercept him.
5. untitled Emperor Maul AU fic
(so you know how in my "Maul finds Ezra first" AUs, Maul is raising Ezra with this idea that one day they'll defeat Palpatine? yeah, this is the AU where they actually manage to do that, leading to Maul accidentally-on-purpose ruling the galaxy.)
Ezra’s heart pounded in his throat as the lift descended.  He clung to his lightsaber so tightly that his fingers ached.  Even though his Master stood right beside him, he was alone, as if the rest of the galaxy outside his own head had just dropped away. Control your fear.  The voice in Ezra’s head was somewhere between his own and his master’s.  Ezra gripped his weapon even tighter, letting his anger well up within him and drown out the fear.  He was more than ready for this.  This was the purpose he’d been raised for.  Sidious had tortured his Master, used him, and then thrown him away.  And today, he would finally pay for it.
6. untitled Sith Sabine AU, in which Maul stays in power on Mandalore and Sabine is both Force sensitive and Maul's apprentice
Sabine’s eyes snapped open at the barely audible sound of a vent sliding open.  She stayed still, her muscles relaxed, feigning sleep.  Quiet metallic steps crawled down the wall, the pattern indicating at least six legs. All at once, the clanking of metal against stone stopped.  Still Sabine didn’t move, keeping her breath steady and even as she waited.  Any second now… There was a soft scraping noise and Sabine could sense the droid hurtling through the air toward her.
7. yet another untitled fic that I've been referring to as the Malachor AU
(this one I started writing/planning at the same time as Lost and Found. it's another AU where Maul kidnapped Ezra as a small child, but in this one Ezra and Kanan meet on Malachor)
Ezra had never felt so small in his life.  Here on Malachor, surrounded on all sides by the Force, the Temple towering above him, he was a meaningless speck in thousands of years of history and power. He wasn’t afraid.  Intimidated, maybe, but not afraid.  The knowledge that was hidden within the Temple was his birthright.  And this time, he would finally claim it.
8. another "Order 66 didn't happen" AU, in which Ezra is kidnapped by Maul as a kid, but in this one Maul doesn't kill his parents, and angst ensues
The dream had mostly faded already by the time Ezra figured out how to move.  He drew his knees up to his chest as he huddled in the corner, his stomach doing backflips.  What little he did remember made him feel like hundreds of tiny bugs were crawling across his skin. Shadows surrounding him.  Barely being able to breathe.  Struggling against something that wouldn’t let go. He stiffened, all thoughts of the dream vanishing from his mind, at the sound of footsteps in the corridor.  He shrank back into the corner as the door slid open to reveal his Master.  Ezra lowered his gaze, blinking rapidly.  Even the dim light in the corridor was nearly blinding in the complete darkness of his cell.
9. an upcoming "In the Shadows" fic, in which Kanan and Ezra finally escape the Inquisitors...by getting themselves captured by the Rebellion
He and Kanan were the only ones in the room, so Ezra let himself slouch as he leaned against the wall.  The other Inquisitors expected more decorum from him, but Kanan still let him get away with it.  Not that Ezra had much capacity to care right now.  After spending all day reaching into the minds of stormtroopers and officers, Ezra’s own head was filling with pressure and static.  Something was grating against the inside of his skin, which felt like it had been stuck onto his body all wrong.
10. the next (again, untitled) "In the Blood" fic, in which Ezra stares at that holo of himself and his parents for too long and has a small nervous breakdown
Ezra had been staring at the image so long that his eyes were starting to ache, but he couldn’t tear his gaze away.  In the holo, he and his parents all looked so happy.  So normal.  His father had no idea that the little boy in front of him wasn’t his.  That he was a monster born out of darkness.
also, I know it said 10, but I'm gonna add on an 11th one as a bonus. this is from a fic that I don't know if I'll ever post because I've been considering reworking it as original fiction but I've been kicking this idea around for like, years and I low-key really want to share it
11. untitled modern AU in which Maul is a serial killer and also Ezra's dad via kidnapping, because I am a parody of myself but I'm leaning into it now
“The body found in the Cowen Forest Preserve has now been identified as nineteen-year-old Hannah Walsh.  Police are attributing this death to the serial killer known as the Mauler, making this the killer’s twenty-seventh known victim.  The public is advised to –” Ezra slammed the button to shut off the radio.  Up until now, it had been doing its job as background noise, keeping him from getting distracted by his own thoughts.  But the news about the body found a few days ago had driven him right back to the things he wanted to avoid.
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hiitsdifferent · 6 months
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I don't know - I'm not feeling 1989 TV. I prefer the originals and the vault tracks are okay. It doesn't mean I hate Taylor or re-recording her masters is an overall failure - chill stans, or just come at me in my inbox oh well.
It just means something is missing for me with this one. Her voice is stronger and no one expects her to act in her early 20s again. But she is a performer, and she frankly sounds bored throughout for me. Welcome To New York lost its sense of adventure (she's been living there for a decade now), Blank Space lost its snarkiness (one of my top 5 songs took a hit ngl), Style lost its classic edge, Out Of The Woods lost its urgency. Where my frustration for the album is how could she almost perfectly re-record almost everything from All You Had To Do Was Stay onwards, but not the four most popular tracks. She has the anxiety in I Know Places but this OOTW would've gotten mauled by those wolves sorrynottsorry. She can have the sultriness for Wildest Dreams but not the wistfulness for How You Get The Girl. It just seems all over the place to me.
With the vault tracks - they're just okay? They definitely sound like they could be on the album but the lyrics don't hit the spot for me- there's some odd word phrasing and rhymes and feel rushed. I'm not sure they offered anything newer than what we've gotten before or since the original album. I do love Slut and Suburban Legends (even though it sounds like Mastermind), and the rest will grow on me.
Though her voice wasn't as strong in the original 1989, it does have those initial intentions and emotions she captured and that's what makes me love the album as much as its classic pop sound. This version just didn't do it for me.
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themusesof75 · 1 year
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Long Ago, chp 4
Wolf, there it is.
Back when I shipped the subtext of Clawdeen/Draculaura.
As a pup, Clawdeen would get her hair braided by her older sister. Clawdeen would watch her sister tighten and braid their other siblings' manes, it was very boring but very helpful to many monsters. The regular charge of Clawdeen was her younger sister, Howleen's hair every waxing moon. Howleen was less than grateful and yipped in complaints the entire time, Clawdeen couldn't help but twist extra hard at the scalp. The two wolves barked unkindly words until Clawdeen gave up half-way. Howleen said she was fine with the unfinished look, and she would make it a trend.
The night was early, Howleen banged her sister's door as she left. The tween werewolf walked the streets. She had planned to meet a friend in the shadows. The stranger in the shadows didn't let her go despite the mauling her big paws left on his arm.
The next morning, Princess Cleo pushed open the door to the Wolf's Needle.
"Draculaura! Ghoulia and I experimented with a potion, in which a single drop of her undead blood became a full liter. Tell us if it's rich enough for the head Night-Walkers, would you?" Princess Cleo announced as she sat in her usual chair and waited for her friends to praise her.
Ghoulia saw the mood was grim. Draculaura held Clawdeen as the wolf held her face in her claws.
"Tel me what's wrong." Princess Cleo said, uncomfortable asking about other creature's undead existences but concerned with the werewolf's mysterious pain.
Clawdeen growled then turned her tear-streamed face up, "My sister is missing."
The princess and Ghoulia knelt down at the wolf-woman's side. "Tell us more."
"The little mutt left last night and didn't come home. She's not answering our howls and my brothers have looked everywhere in the city." Clawdeen said, her voice raw and low.
"We'll find her, my Heart." Draculaura said, stroking behind Clawdeen's pointed ears.
"Have you told Lady Medusa? She has extra foot-monsters to help the search." Princess Cleo stated.
"My brother Clawd told his friends in her group and they're looking but they don't really care. That over-stuffed griffin said it's for morale and not likely they'll find one lost pup." Clawdeen said, "I want to maul him because I know it's probably true."
"I swear to Ra, I will have that bird chopped over my salad." Princess Cleo stated, "I can send the guard out to search."
"Cleo, they'd put her down before bringing her home." Clawdeen stated, "I'm not making you a dress today so you might as well beat it."
Princess Cleo stood up, "You might as well take a long flea-bath, you filthy mongrel!"
"Cleo, please-" Ghoulia started to moan.
"Get out, you spoiled, diamonds for brains, all-bark-no-bite mirage!"
Draculaura grabbed her ghoulfriend's arm, "Sweet-fang, before you say something you regret-"
The princess wheezed, " You are ashier than the Night-Walkers on mid-day and your table-manners are closer to an animal! You have lost me as a customer! Run off a cliff!"
"There are no cliffs in the desert!"
"Stupid mutt, there are just find one!" Princess Cleo said as she slammed the door. Ghoulia ran after the princess, gave a look of apology to her friends, then left out the door.
"Oh my fangs. I'm shaking." Draculaura said, "Clawdeen, are you alright?"
Clawdeen sighed, "She's a good friend. I needed that."
In the DeNile palace, Princess Cleo went into her sister's personal room. Princess Nefera was absent, so the room was welcoming. Standing in the corner, her nose to the wall, was the genie.
"Gigi, you’ve got to hate your captor." Princess Cleo stated with a hand on her hip.
The genie’s voice was very high, "Your Highness, I am forever loyal to my Finder, and we really have much fun tog-"
"I am plotting to bring her down from her pedestal and bury her beneath our pyramid's tunnels." Princess Cleo said, a thrill deep down in her heart.
Gigi turned from the wall; her large eyes had tears of hope. "Praise the stars! She is literally the meanest Finder I've ever had in, like, three thousand years!"
"No surprise here." Princess Cleo gestured to her face, "Join me in dismantling her."
Gigi began to agree but then closed her lips. "I live by rules to never harm my Finder. Or trade to another until the present Finder's thirteen-wishes are done."
"That would be too easy, wouldn't it." Princess Cleo said warily, "Tell me what do you know about her. Seen any weaknesses? Any secrets?"
"Everything horrible she has done everyone is privy to watch and view. I am sorry, Princess Cleo."
"Fine for now. Keep a watch. Are you certain you can't shift to another Finder? My friend needs a wish." Princess Cleo said.
"My rules have bound me, but I am curious to your, err, friend wants." Gigi said in genuine concern.
"Her sister, a mere child, has been lost. Or stolen more likely, and my influence cannot help in the slightest. Truthfully it would hurt the child since she is of wolf blood."
Gigi put an armored hand to her mouth. Princess Cleo noticed the flesh of the monster was layered in shiny, tough scales of sort. The princess thought of the scarab beetle's back. 
The genie sighed, "I would like to grant such a mercy, but it is not in my power. All the magic in the cosmos and I cannot even leave this room. That was your sister's first wish."
"Dear Ra, that sounds like a dull life." The princess said.
"Hmm. After many centuries of solitude, I do know how to amuse myself." Gigi shily said. She then perked up, her long ears twisted, "Oh! Princess, I do have one friend in this room. She could assist."
The genie pointed to her shadow. Princess Cleo felt fear and slight pity for the genie's slipping sanity. 
"There is a monster that lurks in the shadows, she's quite sweet, and I could ask her for help."
"Uh huh, in what exactly?"
"The search! She can go into places others don't think twice about."
A candle went off in Princess Cleo's mind. "Fine idea, Gigi, you do that. Dear thing, I will keep you in mind when releasing the other prisoners."
The genie waved as the princess left the room. Princess Cleo smiled until she was out of sight. She met with Ghoulia in her own personal quarters. The undead lady-in-waiting asked how the genie visit went.
"The worse crime of Nefera's yet. Poor thing is cracking like a snake's skin on a midday rock." Princess Cleo said, "Though she did give me an idea. Ghoulia, how often do werewolves get arrested for walking by the palace's gate?"
Ghoulia took a torch as she stepped down into the DeNile tunnels. Under the palace the royal family kept treasures and bizarre interests. Ghoulia didn't want to learn more than necessary so she stuck to Princess Cleo's drawn map. The idea was the royal guards grabbed the wolf-child to put into the family's secret menagerie. The undead girl opened the door the princess marked as XII. Inside Ghoulia found a room of tiny humans on shelves. Ghoulia examined them closer and discovered they were clay-made toys; their glass eyes still chilled the zombie's veins.
Ghoulia reread the map and considered the XII may have been XV. She retraced her steps and made her way to the next, presumably correct door. Behind that door were jars as tall as Ghoulia herself and small as her palm. A peak inside and Ghoulia found bits of brain, the smell was fresh and rather floral. Through a reed, Ghoulia slurped from the jar as she walked deeper into the tunnels. She was becoming unsatisfied with the mission because her mission had too many chances with less and less possibility of finding Howleen Wolf. 
Ghoulia sat down and thought about what she could tell Princess Cleo. Telling her it was a big waste of time, and a dumb idea, would only hurt her friend's feelings. And lead to screaming which hurt Ghoulia's ears. 
"Umm, excuse me?"
A whisper from the pitch black had Ghoulia look around. She lightly hoped there were other undead humanoid-creatures in the tunnels. She'd have a proper conversation, finally. Ghoulia met with a child-ghoul stepping out under the torch's glow.
"Hi. Gigi sent me."
"Hello. Are you a ghost of some kind?" Ghoulia asked.
"My kind aren't undead. We're connected to the supernatural in-between of dreams and reality. My name is Twyla." The ghoul had deep rings under her violet eyes, as if she was in desperate need of sleep. Yet her health seemed prim and fine.
"The princess's lady-in-waiting. Ghoulia." The zombie said with a polite nod, "Have you seen a young wolf girl? She looks about your age. She has sand-red fur and yellow eyes."
"I have. She isn't here." Twyla said, looking down the narrow, drippy tunnels. "I do like coming here. A lush snack-spot for fresh nightmares."
Twyla told Ghoulia what she saw. Ghoulia told Princess Cleo, who then told Draculaura and Clawdeen. Dracualura left the seamstress shop and went to the wing of the palace where her coven took residence.
"Draculaura, pet! Try this new concoction! The twang is divine." Lady Gory said as she held up a goblet of blood.
The vampire smiled and took a sip. The taste was too familiar, and she wanted to sob. "Oh! Fangtastic, are those notes of beasties I taste?"
"Dearest, we don't ask from where gifts come from! Not when I wish to keep this flowing." Lady Gory said as she took a long gulp. "I swear on this life, this batch gives me ten-times the energy I need."
"You glow in the moonlight, Gory darling. Where would I get my own fill?" Draculaura asked with a big, fake grin.
Behind a locked door, Howleen Wolf laid drained on a pillow. Draculaura bit the leash around her neck and took the ghoul in her arms. The sight broke the Night-walker's heart, but she kept her will strong as Howleen whispered swears on all vampires' heads. Princess Cleo's guards placed Howleen in a sarcophagus and carried her out of the palace.
In the Gorgon camp site, Lady Medusa tended to Howleen's dehydrated condition. The seasoned Lieutenant knew some rough wolves in her day. This young ghoul was tougher than any of them before. The wolf pack hovered around with plates of food. Lady Medusa told them Howleen wouldn't be able to eat until later, they each said it was for when she was ready.
"You said your kind avoided hunting us." Clawdeen said to Draculaura, not looking at her love's face.
"My kind states they can't stand the smell of you but, in actuality, your kind have the most delicious blood. No sweet words from me, Clawdeen. The wolf's blood has nutrition to keep us up for days, it's almost too strong to take without crashing."
"Don't touch me." Clawdeen said, pulling her furry arm from Draculaura's embrace.
Draculaura sighed, "I'll have to do something special to make this up to her."
"Is there jewelry big to bribe back her trust?" Princess Cleo asked, they sat in a tent separate from the recovering Wolf pack.
"There must be." Draculaura said, looking at her long fingers.
Princess Cleo rarely saw her Night-walker friend without the layers of protective clothing. Bared to the world, Draculaura was a thin, pretty, and very small creature. Beside the fangs and air of regal breeding, she was too precious to be considered threatening.
Princess Cleo leaned down to her friend, "So your kind has a secret kink for wolf's blood."
Draculaura’s pale face blushed blue, "Inapprops, Cleo! Can we talk about that later?"
"Oh sure, let the wolf children we haven't found get sucked dried. We could speak of that or, you could help me in taste-testing my new invention."
The Night-Walker put her foot on the wall and walked up the side until she was eye to eye with the princess.
“You yell and stomp and you haven’t helped any of us yet! What are we suppose to follow those windy words?” Draculaura said, her fangs grew as her eyes became black beads.
“You won’t even promise anything because we all know you’re too weak to try.” Princess Cleo said, wishing for a real bite. “You are a waste of good breeding and supernatural powers!”
Draculaura’s ears folded inward at the princess’ attack.
“You don’t resist biting me for the backlash, you resist because I would swat you like a gnat. But thank you, Dracualura, for this very stimulating pep-talk!” The princess yelled. She watched the Night-Walker morph into a bat and fly away. There was squeaking that may have been animalistic or may have been sobbing.
“Stupid ghoul can’t even protect her ghoulfriend’s litter.” Princess Cleo stated to Ghoulia, the undead ghoul shrinking in the corner.
Princess Cleo grabbed a Greek helmet and threw it the tent. “They think I can just buy an uprising like shoes? No, it takes planning, it takes reinforcements, I’m not Nefera I-“
Behind a bronze shield, Ghoulia waited for the princess’s continuing rampage to strike her. By accident, of course. Ghoulia looked over the protection and saw a twisted smile on her gold-painted lips.
“I’m not Nefera. Thank Ra for that.” Princess Cleo said joyfully. “Ghoulia, grab my bag. Let’s get home.”
That night, orders from the crowned princess said to release all prisoners in the jail and in the Night-Walkers’ private rooms.  The people and creatures were told to wait as the council re-evaluated their individual punishments, until then they could walk and fly the streets free as a cat.
“Why under Ra’s sun would Nefera cause such a disaster? It’s not as if we keep a record of all the rats that enter our first-rate prisons.” A council-member inquired at a meeting.
“I’m sure her highness has her reasons. Your grace, could you please explain your probably brilliant reasons behind this possibly terrible turn in judgement?” The other council-member asked.
“Ugghh, I told you not to speak before I have my coffee.” Princess Nefera said as she watched the coffee-maker-servant grind the beans. “You’re too sweaty. Start over.”
From the balcony of Princess Cleo’s private room, one could see crowds of creatures and humans running from the palace’s open walls. The second-born princess was fed grapes by her servants as her friends watched over the scene.
“There’s going to be a party-riot tonight.” Deuce said with a grin, “Babe, this was a great idea. Too many dudes get thrown in for small, dumb reasons.”
“Glad to see you taking initiative but, Cleo, some of those people were dangers to society.” Ghoulia groaned with worry for the innocent.
“If they’re stupid enough to cause trouble against the guards will grab them no question. One improvement is Nefera,” Princess Cleo curled her fingers as she spoke her sister’s name, “edited the rules of what qualifies as trouble. Walking as a monster doesn’t count as trouble anymore.”
“I like.” Deuce said, thumbs pointing up.
“I’d like more if I could believe the prejudice guards would be checked before being sent out.” Ghoulia said, and then wrote down her ideas and proclamations for such reforms in the systems.
“One fix at a time, Ghoulia dear. We’ll clean this up. And have some fun on the way.” Princess Cleo said, a wicked smile as a servant fed her a grape.
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Text
One & Only - Chapter 1 (v2)
Pairing: alpha!Maul x omega!reader
Word Count: ~1.6K
Tags: 18+ storyline (minors DNI - you will be blocked), Maul being his awkward self we all know he is.
Summary: Dress shopping with your friend and Savage takes an unexpected turn. Now you're stuck in the Mandalore palace until the wedding.
<- Intro | Chapter 2 ->
A/N: I know people want smut but I'm trying to set up for a longer story - please be patient, it'll show up soon I promise.
The ceremony was being planned quickly. Maul was handling most of the preparations, occasionally asking your opinions on things through Otara. You weren’t sure why he didn’t ask you himself, he had provided you his com frequency but whenever you went to call him, your mind went blank on what you wanted to say.
That’s what you were doing right now; sitting in your room, tapping your comm unit as you attempted to find something to talk about.
“Ad,” Daughter “Otara is here.” Your mother’s voice called from downstairs.
“Coming!” You called back, slipping your comm device into your pocket. Later then.
Otara stood in the doorway of your family home chatting with your mother, with a large familiar figure standing a few feet away. She’d promised to come with your dress shopping, and while you weren’t surprised to see Savage, you didn’t expect it.
“You ready?” Otara’s grin lit up her face.
“Yeah, let’s go.” You smiled back.
The three of you traveled to the shopping district in relative silence, it was a comfortable silence though. In the past few weeks, you’d gotten to know Savage fairly well since he was basically Otara’s shadow whenever you two went out.
He’d let it slip one night at dinner that he was using you being engaged to Maul as an excuse to spend more time with Otara without his brother being too suspicious. You thought it was cute but even cuter when he tried to pretend he hadn’t said anything when Otara returned to the table.
“Have you thought about what style you want?” Otara asked.
You had come to a stop in front of a small boutique that was honestly way out of your price range but the dress in the window caught your eye.
“Something like that would be nice.” You reply, nodding toward the dress.
She nodded thoughtfully but neither of you moved to go inside. After a moment you noticed Savage’s confused look in the glass. You felt your cheeks go hot, you really didn’t want to admit how broke you were to your future brother-in-law.
Thankfully he didn’t say anything but leaned down to Otara to whisper something in her ear. She smiled and nodded to which he nuzzled her cheek before walking away.
“Did he get bored of us just standing here?” You giggled.
“Probably, he said he was going to call Maul to check-in or something.” Otara giggled back, nudging you toward the next shop.
“Check-in?”
“Yeah, Maul asks about you constantly. It’s worse when he knows we were spending time with you, it’s a million and one questions.” She replied before elbowing your ribs.
You felt your face heat up again.
“Weird that he doesn’t just call.” You finally mention.
Otara paused before looking at you with a raised eyebrow. “He doesn’t?”
You shook your head in response. Otara made a face.
“He’s so kriffing weird. I’m going to say something.”
“Don’t! He’ll think I’m complaining!” You grabbed her arm so she faced you.
She looked at you confused. “I mean if anything you should be. You guys are getting married at the end of the week and he’s not even spoken to you?”
Before you could answer Savage’s voice boomed across the bustling street. “Maul wants us back at the palace.”
“But we haven’t found a dress yet.” Otara protested before you could.
The man shook his head, “I know but it’s urgent. We can go out another day.”
“Their wedding is at the end of the week! There’s already not enough time for her to get something altered.” Otara crossed her arms, looking more pissed than you felt.
“You can tell him that.” Savage growled, startling you both.
“Can I get her home first at least?” Otara conceded.
He shook his head, “she’s coming with us.”
For a brief second Otara looked scared, but by the time you blinked she was back to normal.
“Alright, let’s go.” She wrapped an arm around you, something that wasn’t uncommon but she usually did it on the walk home after a night of drinking, or other times she felt like she needed to be protective.
That made you scared.
“Is everything okay?” You asked quietly as you could.
She nodded but didn’t speak, which was uncharacteristic of her.
“Otara you’re scaring me.” You whispered.
She turned to face you, pulling you closer than what was comfortable. “There’s a group of Mandalorians that are really pissed that Maul is marrying a native-born citizen. They’ve made threats toward you and him.”
“Death Watch?”
“Death Watch.”
“Come on, we need to get you off the street quickly.” Savage stood on the other side of you.
You made it back to the palace in record time, sandwiched between your two friends the entire way.
Maul was standing in the entryway, arms crossed and brow furrowed. He straightened his back when his eyes landed on you. Your hands itched, you wanted to reach for him but his gaze seemed to cloud over and he moved back.
“Get her situated in one of the guest rooms Otara. Preferably one without easy access from the outside.” His voice caused your heart to skip, the power behind it also sent a shiver down your spine at the same time.
“Yes my lord.” Otara gave a shallow bow before nudging you down the nearest hallway.
Both of you were quiet as you walked, Otara’s bow was knitted with concern. You wanted to react appropriately but you were feeling a little hurt and confused by Maul’s reaction to seeing you.
“Here, this one should work.” Otara opened a door and motioned for you to go in. “My room is down the hall in case you need anything.”
“Wait are you leaving me here alone?”
“Just for a little bit. I need to make sure they don’t need me anywhere else.” She shot you an apologetic look as she spoke. “If I can’t come back right away, I’ll send someone up. Just hang tight.”
She glanced down at your hands which you were wringing, trying not to betray how nervous you were. Looking back up at your face, she gave a normal bright smile. “You’re safe here. Safer than you ever were at home. It’ll be okay.”
You nodded with a small smile, you didn’t want to admit you were more nervous over Maul than the threat against your life. She disappeared down the hall, leaving you alone in the room.
Glancing around, you weren’t used to such richly decorated rooms. There were no windows in this particular room, instead, a fancy light fixture hung from the high ceiling as well as some smaller fixtures hanging from the wall. The furniture was rather bare, only a bed and a few dressers were there probably not unusual for a guest room, not something you were used to.
You weren’t sure what to do with yourself as you paced back and forth, pausing occasionally to look at the art on the walls. They were mostly abstract pieces so trying to understand them was a nice distraction.
A knock on the door caused you to jump.
“Hey, sorry, brought you dinner.” Otara’s smiling face brought you some comfort.
“Is everything okay?” You asked as she pushed a bowl of something into your hands.
“Yeah, yeah. Everything is fine.” She smiled before gesturing toward the bed. “Maul wants you to stay here until the ceremony though.”
You paused for a moment. “So everything isn’t fine?”
She sighed. “I thought you’d be happy your beau wants you to stay close.”
“He doesn’t seem really happy that I’m here.” You mumbled, glancing down at the bowl. Looked like noodles of some sort, but you weren’t really feeling hungry.
Otara sighed again. “Yeah. No. He’s thrilled. It took me so long to get back to you because he wouldn’t shut up about how he wanted you to be happy.”
You swirled the noodles around your fork, trying to make an effort to eat. But hearing that he was excited you were here was helping your mood a bit.
“Hey. I know he’s a di’kut,” idiot “but he does genuinely care.” She spoke between mouthfuls of her own meal. “I don’t think this guy has ever had a girlfriend, let alone get close enough to someone to marry them.”
You snorted. “He wasn’t a Jedi. Sith don’t have rules about attraction.”
“I mean, I’m not saying the guy is a virgin. But like, emotional connection. Neither Opress knows what the ever-loving fuck love is.”
You raised an eyebrow at her. “That sounded a little salty.”
She hummed, her mouth full. “Sorry, I’m eating like an animal. I have to go back to work.”
“What am I supposed to do here exactly?”
She shrugged, “I mean basically whatever you want, you just can’t leave without an escort.”
You sighed. Not exactly the answer you were expecting but it was getting late, sleep would help the time pass quicker.
“I wish there were more pillows on the bed.” You finally say, Otara’s head perking up. “Or something.”
You make a show of bouncing from where you were sitting on the bed. “This thing is hard as a board.”
“Yeah, the mattresses here suck. I’ll let Maul know, maybe he’ll stay off my ass about you after that.” Otara chuckled. “Are you good otherwise?”
You nodded. “I’ll be fine.”
“If you need anything you can call for Shur'tuna, she’s going to be your personal handmaid or whatever.” Otara nodded toward your mostly untouched dish. “She’ll drop by in a little while to check on you. She’s nice, I picked her out for you.”
You smiled at her. This was a weird time in your life and you were incredibly grateful she was around to be a support.
“Thank you. I really appreciate it.”
“Yeah and by the way.” Otara gave you a guilty look. “The reason Shur'tuna isn’t here right now is because Maul sent her to get that dress you were admiring earlier.”
You felt your jaw drop. “That was several thousand credit type of dress.”
Otara nodded before turning around and leaving. “Perks of being the future wife of the Mand’alor!"
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