#I cheat and I still fail

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Results from the ‘Who is the tallest MDZS Character poll! Thank you all for voting!

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #nie mingjue #lan wunian #lan xichen #lan wangij #poll #Thank you all for showing up with your whimsy! I saw so many funny tags and messages! What a blast it has been!!! #Nie Mingjue was the distractor answer - word of god *does* say he's the tallest but...he *was* dismembered and beheaded. #It's still a grey area though! This was all for fun after all B*) #Jin Ling uses his hair as a little lasso. Good for night hunting and asserting dominance! #Not the tallest due to his hair gel getting stuck on his hands and reducing the height of his throw during the judging. #And yes- Poorly Drawn Jin Ling is ~4cm tall. Grab you rulers out an visualize that <3 My Friday Treat for you all. #Real feminism is the fact that all the men who won did so by technically cheating and the woman (horse) did it the honest way. #Real feminism is being a horse. Everyone better start getting on that. New Year's resolution. Horse time. #My apologies to the Jin Zixuan likers (lowest votes): He's a bit of a fail wife but that's okay. #I like to imagine that It's the ghost of JYL committing voter fraud to give him pity votes. #(It is still voter fraud if a ghost votes right? Has anyone looked into the legality of ghost voting?) #Much to think about....Hey speaking of the ghosts of women: See you all tomorrow for the new poll!

[ffcrazy15]

"Oh so when James Kirk refuses to believe in no-win scenarios it's 'changing the conditions of the test' and 'commendable original thinking,' but when I, Bradward Boimler, can't accept the possibility of failure and retake the Kobiyashi Maru sixteen times–"

#lower decks #star trek lower decks #brad boimler #in my headcanon his first performance wasn't *great* but he did technically pass #but by refusing to accept that he hadn't beat the test and insisting on retaking it he turned his pass into a fail #and he *kept* retaking it until the instructor point-blank told him that there was no way to beat the program #And that the whole point was to experience personal failure #And *even then* Boims was like “so you mean by failing I actually HAVEN'T failed at all!” #“No that's not– ugh you know what sure. Gold star kid. Just get out of my office." ”Did I get an A+?“ ”OUT!“ #Completely missed the point of the exam and they basically pity-passed him after the seventeenth try #Mariner on the other hand already knew what the point of the test was ahead of time #(She didn't cheat she was still a goody-two-shoes at this point) (An older classmate or friend happened to mention it around her) #But she *did* think it was a bullshit test and just pretended to be humbled and accept defeat in order to get a good grade #She doesn't believe in no-win scenarios either #It's part of what makes them a good team

[ex0rin]

When you do kill, what's it like? // Do you even remember them?

Nobody changes, hmm?

#PARALLELS #so babygirl #the both of them tbh #just puppies in need of leashes #and a firm hand to hold them #[just right dot gif] #frenchie #bucky barnes #cara gifs #tomer capone #sebastian stan #ca: cw #the boys #@5ummit #happy birthday wendyyyyy #this is a little cheat called: #hopefully the best of both worlds #(in which i struggle for a full month to secretly write htp) #(and fail out spectacularly because the boys has me) #anyway! i love you and i hope you like this still 😘 #i know i'm posting it ten minutes early

[bitternace]

WHY ARE YOU SO EVIL!!! /POS. ATTACKING YOU.

Xemnas and Xigbar for 37 if that number hasn't been done? If it has, how about 74?

no puedo pedirle lo eterno a un simple mortal // ay, todo lo que he hecho por ti.

[ID: a mostly black and white drawing with a purple overlay of xigbar and xemnas shown from the hip up on the left side of the image. the background is black and has some diagonal lines with a bit of transparency on the right side. the shadows are harsh, with only a bit of light falling on their faces.

they stand before each other turned to the audience. xigbar, holds the handle and the middle of No Name before him, head tilted down as he looks to the audience. xemnas stands a full head taller behind xigbar, his left hand held some distance below the bladed tip of No Name, his left eye is covered by his fringe.

xemnas visible eye is painted ochre with a white pupil, while xigbar's eye is white and gold. The eyes on no name's handle and the gazing eye on the blade are a vibrant cyan. the caption reads the spanish lyrics "i can't ask a simple mortal for a forever" and "oh, everything i've done for you." /End ID.]

close-up under keep reading.

#capisnotonfire #PUTS MY HAND TO MY STERNUM AND FALLS TO THE FLOOR ON MY KNEES /affectionate #warning to whoever might open the link; there's a slightly suggestive several 'ay's at the beginning porque shakira it's also bass heavy #OBJECTIVELY THE FUNNIEST SONG THAT COULD'VE COME UP. it's the gift that keeps on giving!! #this specific remix's been on my top list... several years; top five for a couple. i've loved it forever. top radio edits ever. #it's basically about a guy that makes up excuses to hide he's cheating and a gal that's fed up with his bullshit and is like. okay. bye. #i briefly considered going with............ right now i know my heart is yours <- in regards to i'm already half-xehanort #as per usual not ship art but it would be HILARIOUS if it was. it would've been able to go so many incredibly funny tragic ways #nano does reqs #my doods #xigbar kh #xemnas kh #IT TOOK SO LONG. putting this out there because i WILL lose my marbles if i do anything more. it's not as polished as it could. #fret not if you've asked for a req i am still doing 'em this one just. kicked my ass (been busy). i tried a couple of things and failed #THEN the file corrupted like 9 hours in and i wanted to die a little (thank the heavens my drawing app has a #thing to get back corrupted files through their screen recording) but i GIVE UP (affectionate) #Does this make sense thematically? Fuck if i know. i forgot all lore (half serious). it looked cooler in my head (jesting) #anyways. mwah tysm for the ask<3 #i love posting at mystifying times (i finish at terrible hours and get excited) #described

[therighthandofvengeance]

“My shoes are too tight, but it’s okay— I have forgotten how to dance.”

He’s literally doing the Macarena?

#who are queue? what do queue want? #for once it’s not an incorrect quote #babylon 5 #b5 #londo mollari #at least i think i'm funny #macarena #is it about a woman who cheats on her boyfriend while he’s gone? yep! #rather fitting considering the amount of times he’s tried (and failed) to cheat on G’Kar #shoutout Adria Tyree #we still love you #he’s an idiot but he’s our idiot

[tojisun]

i havent written angst in a while :<

#sun rambles #id love to tease and be like ''teehee <33 new fic'' but no i genuinely mean i havent written angst in a WHILE #that said... cant stop thinking about failing marriage between you and price #thinking about the two of you trying to make it work but the spark is over; lust exists still - pawing hands find each other in the dead #of the night; pressing at each other's tender parts - but there is just no more love. no more adrenaline rush. no more effort made.. #you cook dinner but you dont call him to eat with you anymore #price packs his bag for an op but doesnt tell you he's leaving so you just wake up the next day and the guest room has been scrubbed clean #you havent worn your wedding ring in months. price has not worn his in a year #its not like theres anyone new too; its not like hes emotionally cheating on you. its just. its done. its over. #you two have reached the end - that was just that

[lunarharp]

qifrey's birthday and silly stuff

#witch hat tag #orufrey #excerpt is from my 30k failing eye fic (link in pinned) which has a birthday scene. i revisited and edited it again and it is now 30k :) #kerplunk thing is because of a mysterious game that shirahama has drawn orufrey playing before and to me it looks like Kerplunk. #a kids' game from this 'Real World' which we live in. card game is Cheat from neopets. but it's a real game. i want to play it for real.... #you lie and cheat in it..hence the name..and 'branston the eyrie you are a bold one' classic neopets tumblr post...no....ok then..... #'hey qif i know we're obsessed with witches' kerplunk but we used to play cheat all the time what happened to that??' #'oh. i just..don't like lying to you. i don't like how it feels.' 'oh haha i guess that's a good thing. ok let's play kerplunk instead ^_^' #'mm. *dying inside crying in the rain in my soul*' #i dislike trying to illustrate my writing. i resent myself for having described oru's captivating mysterious smile so perfectly #i can't draw that. i know what it looks like perfectly in my mind and i am right there on that roof but i can't draw it satisfyingly enough #writing comes from a different part of my brain. there's different things in there. i'm glad i wrote out some of what i can't draw. #then there are things that i don't write or draw but which are still a crucial ongoing facet of my orufrey mindscape. #the Written orufrey the Drawn orufrey and the Unspoken orufrey... three faces of a beautiful irreplaceable jewel in my heart... #could a depressed person do THAT.

[phoenixcatch7]

Man I am just SO CONFUSED. About the time line of this game.

No one is telling me how long links been gone! Or how long the botw-totk timeskip was! They all just started selling my stuff again lol. I'm going to have to get everything redyed!

Me: hey random stranger! Lore dump? You look like a lore dumper.

Kindly npc: why hullo there, link ^^! My, I haven't seen you in a while since the calamity ended! I was so worried when they said you and the princess had gone missing! But it's good to see you're well.

Me: aw, thanks. How long has it actually been tho.

Kindly npc: ^u^

#Having a great time btw I've just been chased across a near sea of miasma by stal riders and more! 10/10 nearly died in a high speed chase #Made it out relatively unscathed which is truly amazing lmao #Spoilers ahead: I have had the funniest time doing the great plateau quest chain. Once I sucked it up and made nice with the creepy statue. #He's(?) been alright. Fair trader. Good deals. I've mostly been terrorising kohga in between absolutely failing to craft working vehicles X #His new boss fights are so much easier than the first one lol. Less fun I'll admit but the music is groovy. You can probably make a #Machine and try and dog fight him but with few exceptions the turning circles are decrepit so I just stuck to mild dodging and shooting him #And running over to hit him some more. Kinda bland for a boss fight I'll say. Could have done with a lot more pizazz. It's kohga come on. #Anyway I do feel kinda bad because apparently he's been stuck down there for however many months/years and I AM kinda cheating with the arm #After the first fight he fled to the gerudo mine and the steward very nicely showed me how to get there but never underestimate #My procrastination because I'd already found it by just exploring so I just teleported. In game it must have been terrifying lmao #Racing across an endless void filled only by the light of your rapidly running out of battery glider and the red glow of the gloom away fro #The apparently immortal ancient warrior who beat you up and tossed you down there and there's no sign of perusal so you're probably safe #But you get there and he's already sitting there poking some bananas having wiped out your goons and plundered your supplies. #Like sorry man but the arm comes with the hero territory I can't exactly take it off. #Maybe if you stopped terrorising the people purah would let you have one of her long distance teleportation slates. It comes with photos? #It can't have been long since botw link hasn't grown an inch XD. Also I've been turning the lore timeline over in my head and still no idea #Are we not sure Rauru isn't from some alternate timeline that got fused with the main loz timeline by accident?? #loz #legend of zelda #totk #loz totk #tears of the kingdom #loz tears of the kingdom #totk spoilers

[yall-mothafuckas-need-misha]

I got Baldur’s Gate 3 for my birthday and I have done little else in the past couple of weeks

I’m sure this will come as a surprise to literally no one, but Astarion is in fact the love of my life and i’ve done many questionable things to earn his approval and regret nothing

But like

The first thing he did when we met was pull a knife on me

I’m a Supernatural fan. That’s my fucking love language

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #he actually fucking killed me when i let him drink my blood #and i’m like ‘oh you’ #he can do whatever he wants and i will still love him #i’m also 100% cheating #i reload recent saves every time i crit fail lmao #baldurs gate 3 spoilers #just realized i should probably tag that

[yoontastic]

#it was a nightmare #it was hell #i tried not to cheat ... #but did it anyways #failed still #bts #meme #bts meme #lejindary tweets #bts army tweet #rm #jin #suga #jhope #jimin #v #jungkook #bts exam #2021 june festa exam

[bredforloyalty]

you know what? it's fine.

#tomorrow i either pass clinical psych or i don't pass. or i get a 3 and i'm forced to consider if it's worth trying again or not #that's fine. then i try to do something with the school psych assignment over the weekend #then i do a bit of preparing for the stupid fucking neuropsych online exam. so I don't go in blind #you gotta know how to cheat and how to use your notes y'know what i mean. #and then i start studying for the comprehensive exam and also work on the research paper #and if i fail clinical psych i can try again one or two weeks later (can't really do one bc i don't want to be back here that week) (so two) #and if i fail the comprehensive exam (or if it's crap like it's a 2 or a 3. bc it kind of needs to be a 5 bc of the degree grade) then i #try again on may 7 #and if i don't manage to finish the research paper by may 6 for the first check‚ i still have until the 19th to do it #i will make it through if it kills me.. and it shouldn't like if this tests my limits then i deserve to be hit with a #giant hammer until i die 💀

[pistachiopie]

KJLDSFKJDLKFJSDFK I GOT INTO THE GOOD COLLEGE™ MY PARENTS WANTED ME TO GET INTO WOOOOOOO

#I'M NOT A DISAPPOINTMENT!!!!!! #rambles #i feel like i cheated lmaoooo #i didn't have time to write their essay. i rushed the mandatory essay in an hour. i almost failed two classes last semester. my grades are #slightly above average. i guess #BUT STILL #ALL THE STRESSING IS OVER #I MADE IT!!!!

[hecksupremechips]

Honestly though I think it’s really a bad sign when I look at Shin Tsukimi and literally feel like he’s a self insert 😩

#the klock keeps ticking #yttd #i wanna replay yttd so bad but i also like Gotta play other stuff with the time i have akskks #but yeah the brainrot this specific character has given me idk if I ever really talked about it but it was BAD #i like obsessively played the game in like 3 days and it was not a good idea lol but just like shin #i had to take like a week to recover from this guy cuz i couldnt stop thinking about him and how hes just like me fr #first off just the very inconsistent personality hes got going on that is very me he has these different personalities he wears to cope with #all the traumatic shit happening hes both so helpless its comical and so manipulative its terrifying #and idk its really interesting how like good and bad he is at being manipulative like hes very smart and can analyze weaknesses and lie so #good not even he knows the truth but hes also grasping at straws he doesnt think things through at all #like the second main game he just didnt prepare at all hes fumbling his way through everything its going so bad #he just wants to go home he wants to outdo the game makers but hes being used by them so bad he wants it to STOP #and its just the way that like. it hits so hard cuz you know hes really not a bad person not at all he doesnt want any of this hes just #being horribly manipulated and doing whatever he can to survive but its also really scary how #well hes able to lie and manipulate and claw his way through but hes also weaker than a grade schooler #and you never forget that either and as much as he cheated his way through he still failed it was all just a cheap trick in the end #and all of this hits very hard like his personality is eerily similar to mine and just the way he thinks and acts #cuz im the same like im weak and a dweeb who likes funny cats but im also emotionally detached and observant and selfish #but where it hits the hardest is his relationship with midori like oooof that one was too real just like #the first person who was ever his friend was horribly abusive and treated him like a child and didnt respect any boundaries #and he just got sick pleasure out of seeing shin be upset and he was like. a groomer #and shin was fucking relieved when he died but also kept his scarf and adopted his personality to survive #and still goes by sou after ch2 and the scene that gets me the most is when shin ai is asked about his relationship with midori #and you can just SEE how horrified shin is because his deepest shame his abuse is being shared to everyone without his consent #and hes reliving it all in that moment and literally seeing who he used to be experiencing the abuse #he just curls into himself and like covers his ears and pulls his hair thats literally what i do AAAAAA #im just so grateful for the direction they took this character kokichi ouma wishes he was shin tsukimi so bad #and yeah just like damn. its scary how similar i am to shin like damn i really am going through it huh oof #I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I WILL DEFEND HIM WITH MY LIFE HE DID ALL OF THAT STUFF YOUR HONOR BUT LISTENNNN #have you considered that hes cute and smart and weird and maybe just needs friends who arent assholes

[bloodenjoyer]

i most certainly have a math learning disability but like now that im out of high school how will that ever be relevant to me again you know i have a calculator . when do i ever need numbers

#i still do need to take the second half of the statistics class that i cheated my way through and still almost failed and the teacher gave #me a passing grade bc i kept begging for ways to raise my grade LOL

[muckmage]

hi muck how are u doing :]

hiii:D i'm still in bed but i gotta get up and eat food this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me

#i looked up a video of a calafornian accent last night so i'll do that soon lmao #it'll be such a long voice ask answer thing cause it's like 3 answers stitched together #aka 1. me trying and failing 2. looking up a list of southern sayings and reading that and 3. now also trying to do something calafornian😭 #it almost feels like cheating to look it up before i try it but otherwise i literally didn't know what that accent was #and its still gonna be bad anyway i'm sure #02

[fizzingwizard]

"My brother had no regard for her; his pleasures were not what they ought to have been, and from the first he treated her unkindly. The consequence of this, upon a mind so young, so lively, so inexperienced as Mrs. Brandon’s, was but too natural. She resigned herself at first to all the misery of her situation; and happy had it been if she had not lived to overcome those regrets which the remembrance of me occasioned. But can we wonder that, with such a husband to provoke inconstancy, and without a friend to advise or restrain her[...] she should fall?" - Jane Austen, Sense and Sensibility

#jane austen #sense and sensibility #literature #the level of sympathy and compassion and understanding of the human heart #we think of historical eras as either moral and right or depraved always one or the other #and that the morality of the first was upheld by the stern treatment of anyone who acted out #and by extension that depravity is brought on by a lack of rigidity #but the struggles and paradoxes that are part of being human were just as real and just as common and people DID understand them #its only the base and unimaginative who think everyone can be fit into one righteous box if they just try hard enough #never acknowledging times they failed their own standards or maybe without ever having been tested at all #its easy for someone who is happy to judge someone who is unhappy #and we have always known this and it's always been true but we're still dealing with the same unbending personalities who are so loud #just the other day i was in an internet fight where multiple people were claiming that if someone says no to regular sex they are cheating #the possibility that they just have a low sex drive or are going through something was called an exception too rare to matter #the possibility that people are different and not everyone wants the same amount of sex and sex is really very awful when you dont want it #was laughed and sneered at. whats more a partner who accepts their partners sex drive for what it is was called a beta lol #being compassionate and understanding of people you love = beta behavior LOL LOL #this is why we cant have nice things. relationships should be based on support and communication and openness #to the reality that people change sometimes in ways we like and sometimes in ways we dont. nothing is forever. #my two thoughts that entire thread: i hope the men who read this arent intimidated out of standing up for their female partners. and #i hope the women reading this understand you have to believe in yourself despite all of it. despite everything the world throws at you. #of course women can be mean and selfish just as much as men and of course mens needs and feelings matter and so does keeping commitments #but no one has a crystal ball and if you enter a relationship expecting things will always be A Certain Way you're in for a rude awakening #especially if all you do to promote what you want is to badger and pressure and shame your partner for being an imperfect human #tangent but its just these things are so timeless. we should know better now. there's got to be something wrong with us that we don't