#I’m high on my hormones and really emotional | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chrollohearttags · 5 months

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“silly boy, come find me when you’re older!” • a. artlert

synopsis: two lovers realize their relationship isn’t meant to be but that doesn’t mean they have to part ways forever..

content + themes: fem!reader (black coded), age gap (2-3 years, armin is 19, reader is 21-22) college au-ish (armin is going to nursing school + reader is a business grad), star-crossed lovers trope, angst + comfort, missionary, riding, hand holding, heavy kissing, crying (not dacryphila), accidental creampie, pet names (baby, mama, baby boy, angel), drug mentions, he gets possessive for like .2 seconds.

word count: 3.1K

📝: I have been so in love with fluff and the idea of soft smut lately (maybe it’s the holidays, maybe it’s my hormones..who knows!) but this is a part of a new au I’m starting! A new story that’ll be coming out soon and I can’t wait. For now, enjoy one of several side fics to accompany it! Also, please tell me y’all know this title reference 😭

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“I really wish you wouldn’t look at me like that…”

the phrase seemed to have alluded him yet again..slipping through one ear and out the next. Almost as if only his body was present and his mind and spirit were elsewhere. It was to be expected though..

“..armie..? Aren’t you going to say something, baby? Anything?..”

you had just confided in him quite possibly the worst thing ever. In truth, his heart was breaking and there wasn’t a single thing that either of you could do to mend it. Although, you felt solely responsible..that the reason for his pain was entirely your fault. But it was a necessary confession nonetheless. One that you truly believed would benefit you both. Distance. Distance between the two of you so that he could properly pursue his education. A long sought after dream of becoming a nurse. Following directly in his mother’s footsteps and making her proud..it was all Armin ever wanted. As it stood, that was a mere concept and it was thanks to the girl lying next to him. His sweet, beloved (y/n). The (y/n) he reunited with at a house party one night and had been wildly entangled with ever since. Hooking up, drinking and smoking…what most peers your age was doing but you also had bigger aspirations for both Armin and yourself. He wanted to become a registered nurse, working with children and you were already two years deep into your collegiate journey as a business major. Laser focused and ambitious..ready to conquer your goals. You couldn’t waste your lives away in the back of his car, hotboxing and having sex. As fun as this little whirlwind romance was, you had to cut things off. At least for the foreseeable future..for both of your sakes. It wasn’t an easy decision in the slightest and you were far more torn up by the situation than what you were letting on but it had to be done. Regardless of your emotions..

“..I just don’t understand..I mean, is there someone else? Why don’t you want me anymore?…”

there it was..underneath all of those newly etched tattoos, shaggy blonde locks and suave charm lied that sweet, gentle boy. The same nerdy kid you’d first encountered whilst attending the same high school. Although two years apart, you found him to be adorable and couldn’t help but to grace the awkward brainiac with a smile every morning on his visits to the library. A beautiful goddess like you even acknowledging him? He was grateful for that alone! But it wasn’t until his senior year did the two of you reconnect. By that time, he had shed his thick, wire framed glasses for icy blue contacts to match his own..grew out his blonde bowl cut to a curly shag and had even acquired a couple of art pieces on his arm. Not to mention, gained some muscle from playing basketball. Some say you were the catalyst for his sudden change. Although this appearance was new, deep down, he was still that wide eyed genius with unbelievable intelligence. And best believe, your kindness wasn’t lost on him. So it came as no surprise, when you happened to cross paths with him at a graduation party that your younger sister, who happened to be in the same class with him, was attending..he found the courage to finally talk to you face to face. All of his newfound confidence flew out of the window when he saw you..that ethereal skin, deity like features and of course, that smile. That smile that made his heart flutter. “You haven’t changed a bit, baby boy…”

certainly his looks had, but you saw through all of that. You saw Armin for who he truly was and for that, he couldn’t allow you to slip away without confessing his true feelings. So that night, with liquor in his veins, he charmed you with sweet words and told you that he’d always had the biggest crush on you. It didn’t take long for you guys to get involved..days after that party, you began seeing one another. Both romantically and intimately. However, your relationship wasn’t exactly conventional or ideal..you were good for each other, perhaps a little too well. Because every moment that presented itself, you’d find yourself in every bed, couch, bathroom or backseat..going at it like rabid animals. The sex was insane and you couldn’t get enough of each other. It was only coupled by the sensation of the drugs coursing your veins..stimulants that sent your mind to places you didn’t need to be. Although there was never a single fight between you two, you knew the relationship wasn’t a healthy one. You encouraged each other’s worst habits. He had gotten a full ride scholarship to his dream school and you had obtained several as well for your ideal program. But you both stood to lose those if you didn’t make some changes. Ditching class to go smoke and then fucking him in every square inch of your off campus apartment. Sending him nudes and salacious messages during class, along with always being underneath each other. He’d never be able to focus and stay on track at this rate! Hence why you had to be the mature one and break things off. Even if it brought you to tears as well. So with a shaky palm, as you lay in bed next to one another, you’d bring a hand to his face and quell his doubts.

“You couldn’t possibly think that..you're the only one I want, Armin. I swear on everything..but..we can’t keep doing this. I love you so much but we’re no good for each other. At least not right now..”

but he’d attest, almost immediately. Insisting that he could buckle down and focus on his goals at hand. However, your mind was made up. That blind obsession and adoration for you would never allow him his room for growth. It wasn’t fair. Here you were only another year shy of receiving your degree and he was barely even started. You had to give him a fair shot, even if it meant removing yourself from the equation. You had even found an internship. He’d try to talk you out of it, convince you that he could juggle both college and you but regardless of how smart he was, nursing school was an entirely different beast in and of itself. It would require his full attention and dedication if he wanted to be an exceptional caregiver. No drugs, no distractions…no you. His studies deserved all of his time.

“So why can’t we make it work then? Isn’t that what couples do or was I nothing more than a joke?”

“Armin…”

in that moment, he’d tug away and roll over onto his side, giving you the proverbial cold shoulder and it stung like hell. The last thing you wanted to do was fight the man you loved. If anything, you wished things could stay like this forever. But you both had growing up to do and until that happened, it was best you parted ways.

“..I have an idea..”

But it wasn’t something that had to be permanent..for now though, there was no need to be upset with one another when you could spend your remaining time enjoying yourselves. Gently pulling him back towards you, you’d maneuver your legs until you were able to crawl on top of him. Those long acrylics scaled his freshly tattooed chest as you gently straddled his waist..at that moment, his little cheeks flushed red and you’d feel his breathing becoming slightly heavier. You’d lean down and begin peppering light kisses to his temple and all around his face..all while slowly rolling your hips against his crotch. With you, he was vulnerable..at his softest and would undoubtedly listen to whatever you said. “I’m all ears..”

that’s when you’d devise a plan that you believed that both of you could agree upon. An agreement of sorts.. “..two years..in two years, we can see each other again, just like this. We’ll work hard and reach our goals. You’ll be in your senior year, doing clinicals and I’ll be at my new job. We can find a place and finally start our lives together. Armin, I love you so much and I don’t want to see you throw your life away. Please..promise me you’ll find your way back to me when you’re ready. When we’re both in a better place..” once he spotted your tearful plea and heard the tone in your voice, he knew what had to be done. Personal feelings aside..you were absolutely right. He knew if he stood any chance of keeping you in his life, he had to blossom into a grown man that you could be proud of. One that was worthy of being called yours. Reaching up, Armin would grasp your hand and bring it to his lips for a gentle kiss, holding it close. He wanted to remember that feeling..savor it and savor you as well. God, he didn’t want you to leave, he wasn’t ready to say goodbye!..but this was the only way. The only way he could ensure that he got to have you in the long run. He wanted you two to grow old together so he’d make this temporary sacrifice to be able to share an eternity with you.

“..you have my word, angel. I promise..I promise I’ll come back to you a better man than what I’ve been..”

“Then take me…right here.”

just then, you’d feel his hand snake up your spine and tug you down towards his chest..not another word was exchanged. Just slow, tender pecks and breathy moans..immersed in the covers and in one another, you’d allow the moment to take you both. Your palms cupping his cheek and his gripping your ass, you’d tousle around underneath the sheets. It didn’t take long for the endearing moment to become rather heated but it was a true testament of the passion between you two. In a moment of haste, his nails would gently dig into the curvature of your back as you leaned up. In a matter of minutes, you’d feel his once flaccid erect growing harder underneath you. The sensation of your dripping heat making direct contact with him..and it was driving him crazy! He needed you so badly right now and you were just the same.

“Armieeee..”

calling out with a high pitched whimper as you ground yourself against him. You couldn’t stop either..almost as if you’d simply combust if you were to be pulled away from him right now. Frail cries would escape his lips as well but he’d find a semblance of control to satisfy your desires, which took precedence over everything else.

“Yes, baby? Tell me what you need..”

cooing to you in that sweet, loving tone that always managed to turn you to meet putty in his hands every time. You were still hopelessly rutting yourself against him; arousal overflowing from between your thighs that quickly. He knew what you wanted but he needed to hear you say the fateful words..give him instruction and guidance the way you had always done. “Hey, look at me, mama..” gently snatching your head forward and forcing eye contact as your chest heaved. “N-need you. Need you so bad, baby..please. Make love to me..” and with that whiny declaration, he’d make haste in fulfilling your wish. With a cocked smile, Armin would reign you in tighter, reaching for you. “Then here..take my hands, angel..” on his command, your hands would join in a gentle clasp, combining as one as you adjusted your lower half to align with his. He’d buck his hips upward and you’d lower yourself down as your bodies became one… meeting in an instant. “Fuck…” the word escaping your mouths simultaneously along with gentle moans. That seemed to be the theme for the night. A stark comparison to the wild nights you shared together previously. Perhaps.. it was the realization that this was really the last time you’d get to do this for a while. That he wouldn’t be able to feel the comfort of your body, to smell your intoxicating scent..to clash with your plump lips..to taste the sticky gloss that coated them. To stare into those gorgeous brown eyes. So as he lie underneath you, being rode to kingdom come as your tightness constricted around him once more, Armin would close his eyes and absorb every memory, every fiber of you..ensuring that he’d never forget his first and true love.

“There you go, baby. Right there..ride me—fuck!”

and he couldn’t possibly forget how you made him feel. How you set him ablaze with your overwhelming passion..still bound hand in hand, heart to heart, you’d keep going. Throwing your head to the wind and calling out your lover’s name, lifting it to the heavens as you bounced up and down. Taking him to your hilt; allowing that swollen tip to prod your most sensitive area. “Armin, baby! Yes..oh my gosh, you feel so good.” For the first time, you didn’t just fuck him. His flesh was more than a mere vessel of pleasure..it was your soul becoming one with his own. You were experiencing true pleasure in its purest form..and neither of you wanted it to end. Finally opening his eyes, he’d be greeted by the ethereal view of your breasts swaying and your beautiful face throwed in ecstasy filled bliss. “Aw, baby..you’re so beautiful. My favorite view in the entire world.” Smiling as tears streamed generously down your cheeks. “Oh my God—I love you, Armin! I love you so much.” Confessing with all that you could muster. And that warm, gushing sensation derived from your sex wasn’t lost on Armin either. He’d find himself in a fit of heaving as your walls closed in around his cock. Squeezing him as if to never let go. “Ahh!-shit..I love you too, baby!—“

in that moment, he could no longer hold back his urges. His need to claim full dominion over you..hastily, he’d bring you to a cease before maneuvering and flipping you over onto your back. It was then that he’d mount you. Diving between your legs as he held each in place. He didn’t even take a moment to adjust. It was mere seconds before you’d find yourself filled with him yet again and he’d begin his descent into your mix. Sloshing and drumming up slick as your thighs collided in a fiery haze. The bed..the one that you’d messed around in so many times before served as the place of consummation for your devotion tonight..ricocheting and colliding with the wall as thunderous slams erupted. Your limbs entangled as your legs found home around his waist and your arms on his back. His entire frame lay bare and pressed to your own as those hips crashed into you. It felt unreal..so unbelievably unreal. But this was the present..your reality for the time being so you’d savor every last moment you got together. Drilling further into your body, his pace sped to a barrage of more steady, consistent strokes. Ones that he would accompany with sloppy tongue kisses. Filling your mouth with them as he pounded you gently. You couldn’t keep your hands off of each other. Regardless of how many times you slept together, something about this moment was starkly different. “Look at me, (y/n)!…” once again, snatching your head forward to meet his gaze. “You’re mine..you’re mine and I don’t give a damn where you go. I belong to you, you hear me? Don’t forget that..” those tears that had been brimming in his eyes finally fell and you’d affirm his sentiment with a fierce nod of your head, assuring him that no amount of distance or time could ever dissipate the love you shared for one another. “Yes baby! And I’m all yours, forever. I won’t ever leave you.” Sealing your promises with one final act..

“Yeah? You mean that?” “Every word, baby. I want you to always be with me..” Vocalizing back and forth as he continually thrashed around inside of your pussy until he sensed the urge that you were close. Upholding one another’s heads in a passionate fury, you’d exchange breathy words amid your love making. Telling him you’re near your peak and him telling you to let go. “Come for me, baby. You can come all over—“ but alas, before he could grant you permission, it would seem that he’d reach his climax first; glaring with a wide eyed expression as his seed filled you to the brim..something he’d never done before! Cursing himself and apologizing as he shook violently, draining every drop of himself into you. Perhaps he took your words a bit too literal but it was far too late to turn back now and shortly after, you’d follow. Showering him with a splatter of sticky rain. Squeezing and dripping all down his shaft. You’d convulse and flail around the mattress until he was able to quell you with gentle kisses. “I’m right here, mama. Let it out, it’s okay..” but once you were back into consciousness, you still wouldn’t let go and you remained entangled like this minutes afterwards. Exchanging “I love you’s” and sweet nothings. Along with tears..shedding them not for what would be lost but the time you had together and the comfort in knowing that you’d reunite soon enough. This time as more than friends with benefits or even mere freshmen sweethearts. But as an entity, an item that could never be separated because your bond was forged on a stronger foundation than one made of pure lust. It was love that would drive you to be better versions of yourselves, to work hard and it was love..that would bring you right back to one another when the time was truly right!

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@citysweet @greenieweeniesworld @hoohoohope @c0pkiller @bey0nseh @violetxxvenom @dragonmaiden79 @fuck-your-chickenstrips-hoe @saiki-enthusiast

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doobean · 7 months

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FAMILY AFFAIRS - ISAGI YOICHI

synopsis: You've got everything in life. A happy marriage with the love of your life, a new job, and you have enough savings to buy a new house! Luckily enough, your kind stepbrother offers to come with you to the open house tour while your husband is busy and away. Nothing can go possibly wrong, right?

contents: explicit content, afab!fem!reader, stepbro!isagi, reader is married to sae, reader also wears a dress hehe, cheating, manipulation, dub-con, step cest, isagi is jealous and is a bully, kinda borderline yandere!isagi, hickeys, cunnilingus, fingering, unprotected sex, creampies, pet names/name-calling, dumbification, doggy/missionary/mating press, ass slapping, dacryphilia, light choking, having sex while on a phone call (oral), mirror sex, mdni word count: 3.9K a/n: part 1 of my kinktober event! idk probably the filthiest thing I've ever written in my life idk what to make of it but enjoy (im sorry sae whoops) and i swear im a good girl

Compared to how most remarriages go, you have to say that your family is part of the lucky ones.

It happened back in high school, where all the weird emotions and hormones of a teenager are at its high but, surprisingly, your stepbrother and stepfather were extremely easy-going people. And they still are. Your stepfather treats your mom with utmost care and grace, something you haven't seen in a while since your biological father stepped out of your life.

Your stepbrother, now a pro football player, is almost a carbon copy. Growing up, Isagi has always been willing to help out around the house, staying up to help you study for exams throughout undergrad and, even now, he's offering to come with you to do something that'll take up half of his off day.

"Hey," You shut your phone after sending a brief message to your husband as Isagi hops into the driver’s seat, hair slightly damp and wearing an oversized hoodie with a pair of sweats as he had just gotten out of the shower. "Thanks for coming with me, you didn’t have to."

Your stepbrother shrugs his shoulders in response as he adjusts the side and rearview mirrors before starting the ignition. "I’ve got nothing going on today. Besides," Isagi eyes you playfully and pinches your exposed thighs between your dress leg slits. "Who knows what might happen if I let you go off by yourself?"

You return the favor with a light slap over his head, earning a loud yelp from the male. "It’s just an open house tour, not like I’m going off to war."

He scoffs cheekily, fixing his hair. "Yeah, but the realtor could be a serial killer or worse—" Isagi leans towards you and lowers his voice. "—an undercover clown."

You shrink, back pressing against the car door, and laugh. "The only undercover clown I see here is you.”

"You’re so lame." Isagi huffs before stepping on the gas pedal.

After a quick game of rock, paper, and scissors over who gets possession of the aux, he begrudgingly accepts defeat and allows you to play everything but country. When he manages to get on the highway, he speaks again, turning down the music volume just slightly. "What’s Sae up to these days? I hardly see him come to our family functions anymore."

You stop humming to the current song and break your gaze from the window. There's a small frown that forms, without you realizing it, and you bite your lips. "You know how his schedule usually is. Campaigns and interviews got him busier nowadays. But he should be landing home later."

"Later today?" Isagi quirks a brow.

You nod, shifting in your seat. "Mhm, he said he’ll call me once the flight lands. Why?"

There’s a long pause before Isagi answers, shrugging his shoulders, and turns at the exit. "No reason."

The drive there is relatively smooth. You guys pass the time with quick snippets of what's going on in your lives since Isagi had just returned overseas from a match and, despite not really knowing the ins and outs of football that much, you're still willing to listen to whatever he's rambling on about. It's one of the small things that you adore about Isagi, he's shamelessly passionate about his career, and oddly enough, the conversation gives you a burst of energy.

You shoot back with your own life updates, though a bit more mild and mundane to his travels and exciting goals. You briefly mention a new job promotion, your closest friends announcing their pregnancy, Sae's new ad campaigns, and all the other houses you've toured within the past three months. The current house you're viewing today seems promising and within Sae's expected pay range.

From what you've seen online, it's a three-story house built near the edge of a hill with an attached infinity pool, a masterchef-styled kitchen, and a private built-in gym. You don't really need all of that, but who are you to deny your husband's generosity?

Isagi lets out a long whistle when he pulls up next to the realtor's car on the long, winding driveway. "You're seriously gonna be living here?" He seems to be in disbelief at the size and so are you. It's a lot bigger in person than what the pictures offer.

"Maybe," You hop out of the car, brushing off any sort of dust collecting to your dress, and adjust your purse straps. "Hopefully, this will be the one."

While you didn’t think the realtor would be a creep, Isagi wasn’t wrong when he suggested tagging along. Upon entering the house, the realtor immediately makes an unwarranted comment about your figure, commenting on how nicely the dress hugs your body before offering his hand. Isagi intercepts smoothly by introducing himself as your boyfriend, which honestly came out of left field, but at least the realtor backed off for the remainder of the tour. After an hour of showcasing, the agent hands his business card to Isagi and nearly stumbles over his feet when leaving the property.

"Is he gone?"

Isagi pulls one of the curtains aside and nods. "Yeah, his car isn’t in the driveway anymore."

"Ugh, it’s a shame but at least the place is nice." You briefly snap a couple of photos of the living room and kitchen. "I think we might put in an offer by the end of the week."

"It's not too far from my place either," Isagi adds. He wanders around the kitchen some more, pulling the cabinet drawers open and playing with the faucets carefree now that the agent is out of sight. "Think I could crash here sometime?" He jokes.

"As much as I love having your annoying ass around, I think not." You giggle when a cute pout forms on his lips. "Okay, maybe like once a month." It's hard to say no to your stepbrother sometimes.

You meet up with him in the kitchen, hands gently gliding across the marble kitchen countertop and stopping when Isagi manages to pull out an unopened champagne bottle from the fridge. He waves it around for a bit before signaling at the glasses in the cupboards.

Isagi bites his lips thoughtfully. "You wanna?"

Why not? It's been quite the ride to get here and you like to think of this as an early celebration. You pull out two glasses and eagerly watch as Isagi opens the bottle. He fumbles a bit with the top and a good amount of the liquid starts spilling out, dripping over the countertop and onto the floor.

"Shit, wait let me clean that up—" He rushes to grab a nearby towel though you beat him to it with your own pair of napkins from your purse.

"It's okay, I've got it, Yoichi." You start to bend down but he grabs a hold of your wrist, forcing you back up.

"No," His tone is firm and you could've sworn there's something fleeting that flashes across his eyes for a moment. "Let me take care of it."

And for whatever reason, you let him. "Alright..."

Isagi takes his time cleaning up the spill. He's careful like that, maybe because he knows you're insistent on buying this property. Knowing him, he wants to make sure everything is perfect.

His hands stop when it reaches your shoes and you feel your breath catching in your throat. The sight of him on his knees triggers a reaction you can't quite understand. You shove the thoughts away and cough loud enough once you notice him hesitating.

"Is there something wrong?" Your voice comes out faint, almost breathy.

"It got on your dress," Isagi states casually, lifting his head to meet your confused gaze. "Mind if I get that for you?" He whispers the last part as if there's a hidden intention behind his words.

You're not sure if your dress got wet. You're positive that nothing spilled on it. But, according to your kinder-spirited stepbrother, there are a few spots and you suppose it'll be bad to leave it unattended.

"Sure," You answer on instinct.

"That's good," Isagi begins dabbing the cloth gently against the fabric, slowly making his way up until he's hovering over your pelvis.

You have no idea why you're starting to feel yourself burn all over the place. It feels like Isagi is taking mental pictures of your figure, storing them all in his head as you feel his eyes trace your skin. Goosebumps start trailing down your arms and you shift your legs together. "Yoichi—"

Isagi stops his motions and tips his head down, letting his bangs fall over his eyes. He lets the towel fall to the floor and you twitch when you begin to feel his callous palms hiking all the way up your legs. It's strangely hypnotic, watching your stepbrother do this and you're not sure why you're allowing it to happen. Everything begins to feel hazy, surreal, and wrong.

Your gut twists on itself inside out when his fingers toy with the waistband of your panties. Surely, there are some champagne spills there? Right? Maybe that's why you feel comfortable spreading your legs for him to clean it up. The two of you silently exchange dazed glances when you guide his hands, brushing the panties to the side of your legs as your heat gains exposure to the air.

"Gotta clean this one too," He rasps out. And you take a deep, shuddering breath when Isagi's lips latch onto your folds, wasting no time with his tongue. You feel like your heart is going to pound out of your chest.

A thousand questions flood through your mind. Has he always viewed you this way? How are you going to present this to Sae? Should you even say anything to your husband at this point? They're the wrong questions to be focusing on, you know that better than anyone. In a split second, your healthy relationship with Isagi has opened so many cracks around its edges that it's now something completely irreparable.

And you're ashamed of just how goddamn good this feels.

"You're so sweet down here." Isagi's eyes are half-lidded when he looks up at you, already seemingly drunk off of you.

Your eyes threaten to flutter shut as his tongue traces around, larping up your intoxicating slick. Isagi lets out a low groan when your fingers run through his hair, gripping it just slightly forward enough to allow his nose to brush against your aching nerve.

All of this comes crashing down when a familiar ringtone goes off. You nearly jump at the rapid vibrations from your purse and hastily fish out your phone, heart dropping at the contact that's on the screen.

"Pick it up, I'll be quiet." The way that easily comes out of his mouth makes you want to throw up.

You swallow back a moan and clench the phone tight in your hands. "Yoichi, I'm being serious...! If he finds out we're both dead!"

"Then make me."

His hot breath hovers over your clit as he looks up, masking his ill intentions behind his seemingly big, innocent eyes. Those very same eyes that would comfort you after a bad day, the same eyes that shine whenever you told him about an achievement—no matter how big or small—, and the very same eyes that are now clouded with something more sinister as he searches for an answer in your own pair.

"If you don't want it then push me away. Make up your mind or else Sae's gonna be worried." Isagi mocks your voice when attempting to say your husband's name. The way it rolls off his tongue makes your stomach churn and the wedding band on your hand suddenly feels unbearably tight.

You shouldn't. You know better. You're in love with Sae Itoshi and this—whatever this is—needs to stop.

"You're turning into a mess down here, sis." You attempt to close your legs together but his grip is like iron. Isagi tilts his head to the side and huffs over your nub. "I said push me, baby."

"Y-Yoi—" Your words get stuck in your throat as he 'accidentally' brushes his lips against your heat. Another dark glint flashes across his eyes and he grins.

You pick up the call and clear your throat, but your free hand wanders to your stepbrother's head, giving him the slightest nudge so that his nose brushes against your slick heat.

"Hi babe, how is everything?" You're trying so hard to level your voice.

"Just landed," Sae replies. There are muffled voices in the background, which you assume are his bodyguards and paparazzi. After some awkward shuffling, he asks, "Are you at the property right now?"

"Yeah," You continue to tug at Isagi's hair, suppressing a moan when he flicks his tongue a bit too hard over your sensitive nub. "It's spacious and has a nice backyard, I—I think you'll like it." You're beginning to pant, almost whining, under your stepbrother's touch.

"Mhm, send over pictures when you can. Is Isagi with you right now?"

You nearly choke out a sob as his fingers begin to edge their way inside. "Y-Yes!" You sputter out, launching forward as your knees begin to grow weak.

"Hey, are you okay?"

You can't stop the twitching and bucking of your legs. Isagi notices and wraps a free arm around the back of your legs, keeping you upright and pressed against his face. "I-I'm fine, why?" You breathe out.

"You sound like you're sick." Sae is concerned. Concerned for your well-being while you are currently getting fingered by your stepbrother.

You almost cry when you feel Isagi’s fingers slip out of your sloppy folds. He gets up from his knees, gripping your waist as you stumble forward from the loss in pleasure, and grabs a hold of your phone. As if he's playing a game, Isagi holds up a finger to his lips, silently asking you to keep quiet. It’s almost scary how fast you see him transition from being an absolute monster to back to being your loving stepbrother all in a second.

Even with his mouth covered in your slick, he clears his throat and speaks with confidence to Sae. "She's feeling a bit down now but I'll drive her back once we're done."

"Is that so?" Sae lets out a heavy sigh. "Thanks, Isagi. I should be back before dinner so keep me updated."

"Anytime, we'll see you later!" Isagi grins over the line before twisting his head down at you. "Sis, do you have anything else to say?" There is it. That look again. His smile sends shivers down your legs as he presses the device to your ear, rubbing it firmly against the side of your face.

You can't find the power within you to break free from Isagi's taunting gaze. The way his lips grow wider as fear washes over yours makes you only fall for his touch just more. It's almost addicting as much as it's wrong.

"I love you, Sae." You force out the words and your stepbrother has the audacity to laugh.

Thankfully, Sae doesn't hear it. "I love you too. I'll talk to you guys later." And the line drops.

Isagi doesn't give you time to recollect your thoughts as he plunges his fingers back into your warmth. Your body staggers under him, hips matching his feverous rhythm, throwing the last of your morals out the window.

"Oh my god—!"

"You love him, yeah?" He hums in the crook of your neck and presses his hardened length against your plush thighs. "Love him more than me?" Isagi coos.

You throw your head into his chest, eyes shut tight, and inhale his stimulating scent. "I love him, y-yes I do...!" You fumble over the words and make a mournful sound.

"Is that so? Well, it doesn't matter either way—" Isagi drags you easily in his arms to the bedroom and positions himself behind you while facing the full-body mirror by the closet. "—because you're going to be screaming out my name." He pulls down your dress straps and starts leaving hungry, sloppy kisses across your neck and shoulder blades.

A shaky breath escapes your lips and you shut your eyes, tilting your head to the side, allowing him even more access. "Yoi..."

"Look at yourself, sis." His sudden sharp tone makes your eyes shoot up. His sweatpants fall down around his thighs and you see him stroking his thick length in the mirror. Isagi presses it against your increasingly wet folds, groaning from how easily your body accepts him, and gives your ass a harsh slap. "Watch how I fuck you."

You can barely recognize yourself in the mirror. Lipstick smeared, tears pooling at your eyes from a mixture of pleasure and guilt, dress straps slipping off your flushed shoulders, and the numerous amounts of hickeys from your stepbrother marred against your skin. And you still have that damn wedding ring on.

Isagi sucks his teeth in as he watches your chest rise and fall when he slowly enters you. The feeling is different compared to Sae's.

Your stepbrother's cock is thicker and angled more to the right, hitting and stretching out spots that you didn't know existed. Once you bottom him out, Isagi pulls back his hips before snapping them back into place. Just one thrust from him is enough to knock the air out of you. He keeps repeating the motion until you're a writhing mess and a puddle from your heat collects onto the hardwood floor.

"A-Ah—w-wait fuckfuckfuck...!"

Isagi snatches your face in his hand and pulls you up against his chest, making his cock nest deeper into your velvety walls. "Visit me often, yeah? It's not fair that he gets to fuck this pretty pussy every day."

You let out a muffled moan when Isagi collides his lips against yours, his tongue immediately seeking refuge in your mouth. Everything feels so hazy, so intense, nothing like this reminds you of how sweet and gentle Isagi usually treats you.

"Baby," He breathes, relocating his hand on your face to your neck, he gives it a tender squeeze. "I'm better, aren't I?" Isagi lets out a whine when he feels your insides tightening up around him.

Your eyes are glossed over, drool seeping out from the edge of your mouth as you mumble, "I—I don’t know… I’m—aaah…”

"Huh? What was that?" He pulls back, keeping the tip in, and chuckles when he watches your face twist in disappointment at the loss of feeling. "Say it and I'll give you what you want."

Isagi watches your reflection, paying close attention to the way your lips quiver at your next words. It's almost as if he's getting off at seeing your internal conflict with tears sticking hot against your lashes. Finally, you give in. "Y-You're better, Yoichi... you fill me up more than Sae..."

His eyes widen with glee. "That's what I fucking thought." Within seconds, he adjusts his grip on your hips and snaps back into your puffy folds. "If he ever makes you cry, you know your big brother is going to take care of you, right? No one can take care of you like I can."

You catch your breath when his toned biceps lift you in his arms. The second your back meets the mattress, his length stretches your hot entrance again.

"Shit, it's like you're made for me," Your legs hang limp over his shoulders as he presses deeper. "You take me in so good."

You pant uncontrollably under him, wanting to start sentences but being unable to finish as his thrusts and the lewd wet sounds from your heat bounce off the walls. You can tell by the dark look in Isagi's eyes that he relishes in the feeling of making you feel overwhelmed and stimulated. Every time when you call out his name, when your moans are forced out by his animalistic thrusts, he clenches his grip harder around you.

"Get on your knees, baby," Isagi coos and he lets out a dark chuckle when you obediently nod.

You struggle to get on all fours, lower body shaken to its core from the intense raw pleasure. You’re taken aback when you see the sheer amount of sweat and other bodily fluids that stain the mattress sheets beneath you. While you're brain is trying to process how on earth you guys are going to clean this up, Isagi has taken hostage your hips again, lifts your dress up, and is already repositioning himself from behind. With a swift swipe of his tip, he claims his territory once again.

"Fuck," He hisses, watching the plump of your ass jiggle at every thrust he makes. His other hand twists underneath you, digits finding their home on your clit. "You make the sweetest sounds, you know that?"

A familiar coil builds in your stomach. A feeling that has brought you and Sae closer dozens of times before. Only, this time, you feel yourself about to come undone by the hands of a different man. As his fingers work their final motion around your throbbing clit, your vision turns foggy, and your body slumps onto the mattress as your orgasm washes over you. Isagi groans as your walls fluctuate and squeeze desperately around his length, sending him close to his own ending.

His fingers dig deep into the flesh of your ass, leaving half-crescent moons, as he pumps streaks of white inside and pulls out immediately, allowing some to finish dribbling out on your back. The sight of you spasming with the combination of both your and his fluids spewing out causes him to moan in delight.

"Once a month, right?" He repeats your earlier promise, hot breath ticking your wet skin. When he realizes that you're too dumb-fucked to respond back, he reaches over and attempts to wipe the sweat collecting on your face. His normal bright smile comes back and it's like nothing has changed. "Let's get ready to meet up with Sae."

There's a heavy shift in the air when dinner arrives.

Isagi had graciously offered his hoodie to cover up the hickeys, knowing damn well that your husband is going to see them regardless when you return to your shared apartment. Still, Isagi believes he's still doing his due diligence as a good stepbrother.

You're sitting across from Sae and have been avoiding both males' gazes throughout the evening. From the second you sat down, to the moment Sae kissed your cheek, it felt so hard to breathe. You're not sure if Isagi is helping or making the situation worse by rubbing his hand back and forth on your thigh.

It's almost an hour into dinner and you've only taken three bites and are on your third glass of wine. Being the attentive husband he is, Sae picks up on your uneasiness and sets down his fork.

"Everything alright?" Sae eyes the two of you across the table.

"Yeah," Isagi speaks for you and curls an arm around your shoulder. "She's just feeling under the weather, remember?"

You're too overwhelmed by everything going on, so you lean into his touch, hands gripping your thighs in the process like you're trying to crush something, knuckles white and fingertips bruising.

You hate how going back to your husband's arms after this, talking about your future together, and potentially starting a family—all of it seems like it's the most daunting feeling in the world.

KINKTOBER TAGLIST (PART I)

@milkistoshi @mareonyan @saenora @blissblossom @wowonamo

#doobean:kinktober23 #bllk smut #bllk #blue lock smut #blue lock #blue lock x reader #isagi yoichi #isagi yoichi x reader #isagi yoichi smut #whoops sorry my fingers slipped #cw: cheating #im sorry sae ...#i love u #cw: stepcest #doobean writes

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evanpeterswhoresblog · 1 month

Note

i'm soooo glad you're back!!! love your writting so much, was thinking about some ghostface¡ tate or shit yk...like everyone who flirts with reader end murdered

i’m sorry this took me so long to do 😔 but i sorta did my own twist on this request, hope you don’t mind… i love it… anyway… :)

~~~

Lovefool

Tate Langdon x f!reader

warnings: murder, smut, stalking, obsession, very toxic, manipulation, very minor talk of drug use… virgins, yeah idk what else it’s just stalker tate being crazy for you

summary: tate’s loved you since the first moment you met, and he would do anything to be with you… anything…

word count: 4.4

~~~

2011

You stare at the boy in front of you, a mix of emotions stirring inside you. He’s your age still, you aren’t too surprised at that. You’re more surprised at the fact that he’s in front of you. It’s been so long since the last time you saw him. You remember the pain, the pure fear that paralyzed your body the last time the two of you had an encounter. It still makes you uneasy.

“What are you doing here?” You ask, your voice weak.

He shrugs. “It’s Halloween.”

“There’s been plenty of Halloweens Tate and this is the first time I’ve seen you here. What do you want?” You reply in a harsher tone than.

Tate shrugs again and starts to play with the sleeves of his sweater. You can’t believe this is real. You want to close your eyes and pretend this is all a sick dream, though you haven’t slept in years. After a few seconds, you cross your arms over your chest and take a deep breath. This isn’t going to be easy.

“Tate the fact you even have the balls to try to find me is crazy, what happened? Did you suddenly feel some sense of guilt? Are you finally sorry for what you did to me? I don’t even care if you are sorry, I don’t care about anything except the one question I’ve wondered since the night it happened,” you say.

“What question?” He responds.

“Why?” Your eyes start to burn. “Why did you kill me?”

~~~

1993

Tate had never seen any girl as beautiful as you. Never. Not in a movie, not in a magazine, nothing. From the first time he saw you in kindergarten, he knew there was something special about you. Of course, he didn’t know it would grow into what it did until middle school when his hormones took over. His feelings for you quickly transitioned from a pure crush to a sick obsession. And the best and worst part of it all was that you had no idea.

You never really spoke to him. He was out of your league. You were popular, but not braindead popular like the people you surrounded yourself with. Tate had seen you in some of your classes. You were smart, you got the best grades in those classes. You had plans for yourself after high school, unlike your friends. That knowledge only made him admire you more.

The problems began when you started going out with one of the popular boys in your group, David. He was awful for you; Tate didn’t understand why you chose to have such a relationship with someone like that. He’d watch how David would wrap his arms around you in the hallways, leave small kisses on your cheeks, and whisper words in your ears that made your face turn bright red. It made him furious.

What did David have that he didn’t? Why was he so special? Tate knew he could give you more than David ever could. So, why were you with him?

Tate quickly became blinded by rage and jealousy.

At night he’d lie awake, the knowledge that you might’ve been out there opening your legs for another boy making him sick. That’s when the fantasies began. He imagined killing David. How would he do it? Where? In what way would leave the least amount of blood on his clothes? The image of his mutilated body consumed Tate’s thoughts. He liked it.

It was around that time that he had found the mask.

It was a strange mask he found in the basement. It had a long white face with black holes for the eyes and a long mouth. He wondered which resident of his house had left it there for him. He didn’t know, and frankly, he didn’t care. All he knew from the second his eyes fell upon that mask was that bad things were going to happen.

He started going out at night and driving by David’s house. The mask he wore gave him a sense of power he never knew he could feel. At first, it was innocent. He’d simply drive down the other boy's road and look through his window for a few minutes before leaving. But all it took was one second of seeing you inside to blow the whole thing up. He was livid, seeing red. He decided he needed to bring his fantasies to life and get rid of David for good.

Halloween was when the opportunity to kill David became undeniable. By that point, Tate had been stalking the two of you for a month so he knew the basics. Which room was Davids, how to get into his house, and where his parents were most likely going to be. He had it all planned out. So, on Halloween night he put on the mask along with black robes that covered his entire body and ventured to the other boy's house, ready to kill.

He brought a knife, and when the time was just right, he snuck in through one of David’s open windows and started his game. He crept through the empty house, not making a sound. Getting to David’s room only took him a few minutes and what he heard from outside the door made him not regret his choice at all.

“Yeah, I know, listen she’s so close to finally giving it up to me and that’s what I’ve been working for this whole time. Once it happens, I’ll dump her, easy,” David spoke into his phone. His voice was cocky. It made Tate clench his jaw in frustration.

“Because dude, do you know how many girls from school I’ve already got under my belt? Y/N is just gonna be a name on my list. Yeah, whatever, I gotta go anyway I need to shower for the party, maybe I’ll get lucky, and she’ll drink too much. Okay bye.”

Before David could even get up from his chair, Tate kicked the door down and stormed in, too overpowered by his rage to think about anything but slitting the other boy's throat. He pounced on him, stabbing the knife into any part of his body he could reach. David screamed, but Tate quickly silenced him by shoving the knife down his throat. He felt empowered, he felt thrilled at the sight of his dead peer. It was amazing.

Tate didn’t waste much time gawking over his achievement, however. Once he was sure David was dead, he quickly pulled the knife out of the boy and fled out the window and back to his car. As he drove through the small neighborhoods of your guys' town, he wondered how big the news would be. Would you cry? He hoped you wouldn’t. Not over that asshole. You would move on, and Tate would wait however long it took.

~~~

The news of David’s death spread faster than wildfire and consumed Westfield High’s drama for weeks. Out of all the kids in the school, you took his death hardest. Seeing you so depressed almost made Tate regret his actions. He couldn’t bear seeing you tear up in class or show up to school two periods late. You weren’t like that.

However, as the days turned into weeks, you started to appear healthier and happier, and soon enough you were back to your normal self. Tate was glad, you were always so much prettier when you paid attention in class. He decided it was time for the second part of his plan to finally act. Though he was incredibly nervous, he knew it was then or never. He couldn’t risk you getting a new boyfriend that he’d have to kill again.

So, one day, he followed you into the library when the two of you coincidently had a study hall during the same period. His heart was beating so loud he could hear it in his ears. There you were. sitting at one of the tables alone studying, and he was going to speak to you. He’d thought up conversation starters all morning along with taking a few extra hits off his bong to help with the anxiety.

He shook the nervous thoughts from his head and grabbed his notebook from his backpack before walking in your direction. Your head was down, your hand moved aggressively across the paper as you wrote your notes. Tate stood at the other side of the table for a few seconds simply admiring you. His hands were shaky, his breathing uneasy. God, you made him lose his composure by existing. It was excruciating.

After he was done staring, he spoke, his voice quiet. “Hey y/n, do you mind maybe helping me with some of that psych homework?”

Your head shot up, your eyes instantly meeting his. He swore he couldn’t breathe. You, y/n, were looking at him on purpose. At that moment he didn’t care about what you were going to say, he didn’t care if you completely rejected him. All he cared about was how good it felt to have your eyes on him. Such innocent, loving eyes.

“Oh, yeah of course Tate that’s actually what I’m working on right now. Just sit, we can do it together. Unless you’re like super behind,” you answered.

“Are- Are you sure?” He couldn’t help the uncertainty. Did you really say yes to him?

“Yeah... should I not be?” You replied with a smile.

“No- sorry.” He sat down across from you. He could smell your perfume; he’d never been this close to you. “I just wasn’t sure if you even knew who I was.”

You chuckled. “How could I not know who you are? We’ve literally been in the same school system together since kindergarten.”

“I don’t know. You’re you know popular and stuff,” he said as he opened his notebook.

“Not really, besides even if I was that wouldn’t automatically make me forget anyone. But anyway, you can use my notes in a second, I’m almost done with the page,” you responded. You looked back down at your work and started writing again.

Tate nodded despite you not paying attention and watched as you wrote. He felt like that whole conversation was another one of his daydreams about you. Was he really sitting across from you? Or was it another mid-class nap? He cracked his knuckles to make sure he wasn’t dreaming and thankfully, he wasn’t. It was all real life.

“Sorry if this comes out as creepy, but I feel like I haven’t seen you around in a while. I mean, when was the last time we even spoke?” You suddenly spoke, your eyes back on his.

“I guess you weren’t looking hard enough to see me,” he said with a shrug. All his confidence was a facade because on the inside he was losing his mind.

He noticed the way your cheeks slightly turned pink before you replied. “Yeah, I guess I wasn’t. But I should have been.”

He knew deep down you were going to be his for so long, but at that point, he knew he had already achieved his goal. You were his.

~~~

“What is this place?” You asked as you clutched your cardigan around your body.

Tate smiled and grabbed both of your hands in his. “I told you it’s a surprise. Patience is a virtue.”

“I have patience, but I also have a lower body temperature than usual and it’s bothering me so I would really appreciate it if you’d just take me to the surprise already,” you said, a small smile forming on your lips.

“It’s seventy degrees.”

“Yeah, but it’s also windy at the beach and it’s probably colder than seventy because of the ocean’s temperature.”

Tate sighed and leaned his head down to press a small kiss on your lips, a feeling he still hadn’t gotten over. “What am I going to do with you?”

“Terrible, naughty things I hope,” you replied, kissing him again. “But please lead me to your special surprise beach spot.”

Though he wanted to stand there and kiss you all night, Tate obeyed your request and began to lead you further down the beach. It had been a few months since the two of you started talking, and to say it progressed would be an understatement. Tate had truly underestimated how easy it would be to capture your attention. All you wanted was a sweet, caring, genuine boy and he could be all those things easily.

So, after a month of being friends, he asked you out and you said yes. The relationship grew deeper with each day, and it didn’t disappoint him one bit. He loved everything about you. The way you’d lie on your bed with him and talk for hours, the way you’d make your relationship with him public by holding his hand in the halls, and most importantly the way you never expected or wanted him to change to fit in with your friends. You liked him for who he was, and it melted his heart.

It was your three-month anniversary, and Tate wanted to make it special. Even though he knew before the two of you got together that you were a virgin, he didn’t know to what extent you were. He quickly became aware you had done most things already, just not full sex. At first, he was annoyed at the fact that you weren’t completely his because he had never done anything with a girl before you. But after the first night, you went down on him, he wasn’t that upset anymore.

On this night he planned to take the next step with you. He had it all set up. The blankets, the lights, all of it. As the sight of his setup came into view, he watched your face light up. You squeezed his hand and grinned up at him.

“Is this really for me?” You asked.

“Yeah, do you like it?” He replied.

You nodded and sped up to reach it, dragging him with you. Once you made it you dropped down to sit on the blanket, urging Tate to do the same. “This is so cool. You’re the first boy to ever do something like this for me. I love it.”

“I’m glad, I know how you like sentimental things,” he said as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders. “And I’ve been wanting to show you this spot for a while. I used to come here a lot as a kid and watch the waves with my dad... before he left. I wanted to make it special with you because you’re not like my dad. Right?”

“No, I’m not. I won’t ever do anything to hurt you like that. I lo- I like you Tate, a lot.”

Tate only stared into your eyes, his heart beating faster than it ever had in his life. You almost said you loved him. He knew then that night was going to be the night you finally gave yourself to him. Something in your eyes made him certain. Your eyes were dark. You stared up at him as if he were the only boy in the world. There was a feeling in the air, one of lust and fear.

“I’ll never want to hurt you either,” he mumbled after a few seconds. “I doubt I ever could.”

You gave him a small smile and placed one of your hands on his cheek. You caressed the skin with your thumb as you slowly started to lean your face toward his. He accepted your lips on him, kissing back instantly. It was the moment he’d been working up to for years. He was finally going to lose his virginity to you, and you to him. Nothing would ever compare.

~~~

The sound of Nirvana mixed with skin slapping filled Tate’s room. He couldn’t help the moan that left his lips when he looked down at you. Your back was arched so perfectly, your waist looked impossibly small, and your ass looked incredibly big. The side of your face was smushed against one of Tate’s pillows. You were so red, so loud you had to bite your hand to spare the whole house from hearing. Tate took in a deep breath and slapped your ass, his thrusts not faltering for even a second.

“Fuck baby, you look so pretty right now. You take me so well,” he whispered. He wrapped some of your hair around his hand and yanked you up, making you practically scream. “Yeah, you like that. You like being manhandled y/n?”

You let out another moan but didn’t reply. Tate slapped your ass again and threw you back down to the mattress. He leaned over you, your sweaty body feeling perfect against his. He was close to finishing. He’d already made you cum a few times that day, so he wasn’t too concerned about where you were. All he was concerned about was getting closer to you before he came.

“I love controlling you, you’re so helpless. Fuck I’m so close,” he mumbled in your ear. “You’re mine, all fucking mine forever. I’ll kill anyone who even tries to take you away from me.”

You made a noise and Tate couldn’t hold back any longer. He came inside you, his cock pulsing heavily. You groaned; his cock was hitting your cervix too hard it hurt. He waited a minute or so before finally pulling out and moving to the spot next to you on the bed. He’d never felt anything as amazing as having sex with you. He was breathless.

He was so caught up in his thoughts about what just happened that he didn’t notice your sad expression. When he eventually looked at you, he saw your frown. Immediately he turned to his side and faced you, reaching out one of his hands to brush a few of your hairs behind your ear.

“What’s wrong baby?” He asked.

“Nothing,” you replied.

“It doesn’t look like nothing you look sad; you can tell me whatever it is.”

You sighed and turned your head to meet his gaze. “Why do you like hurting me? Like during sex and stuff. You’re always so rough and I don’t know you’re really mean and sometimes the stuff you say is… scary.”

“How is it scary?” He laughed.

“You said you’d kill anyone who would try to take me away from you,” you said.

“Yeah, I would. I swear I’ve said this shit to you before. I would do anything for you, or to keep you,” he responded.

“Don’t joke about that Tate, you know I’m scared of killers because of what happened.”

“Oh, so this is about David? Why are you even thinking about him y/n he’s been dead for months. Do you miss him, or something is that it?” He questioned; his tone harsher than before.

You scoffed and sat up. “You’re seriously making this about me missing David?”

“Well, is that what this is about?”

“You’re unbelievable,” you muttered before you stood up and started to get dressed.

“Oh, my fucking God y/n I’m sorry for whatever I said wrong while we were fucking. Can we just move on already? I don’t see what the big deal is,” he snapped.

“No, we can’t just move on. You scare me sometimes Tate like genuinely. I know you mean it all in a sweet way but it’s weird. I love you but you don’t hear me saying I’d kill people if they talked to you or looked at you a certain way. That’s not normal.”

Tate sat up. “I wish you would say those things. I wish you loved me as much as I love you. I’d do anything you ask; I would shoot up the fucking school if you wanted me to.”

You looked at him, he could see the terror and fear in your eyes. “Are you serious?”

“Of course, I am. I don’t get why you’re acting so scared. I’d never hurt you I don’t even think I could if I wanted to, you mean more to me than any person alive or dead,” he answered.

“You’re sick,” you mumbled. You grabbed your bag and walked to the door. “I think we need some time apart; you aren’t sane.”

His heart practically stopped. “What?”

“We need to stop seeing each other for a little while, I can’t take this insane shit Tate. I’m sorry. You know I love you, but I need you to get some help before I can be with you.”

Before Tate could reply, you left. All he could do was stare at the door, a million thoughts roaming his head. Did you really just break up with him? Was that it? Did you just throw away everything the two of you had because you felt his love was too strong? It didn’t feel real.

As the night progressed, he tried to call you, dozens of times. But each call was either declined or rang out. His anxiety grew with each ring of the phone. Why weren’t you replying? Who were you seeing? Did he really mean so little to you that you could leave so easily? His mind spun with scenarios, each one worse than the last. By the end of the night, he had convinced himself you were cheating on him, and the following days only worsened his state of madness.

You ignored him completely in school. Every time he tried to talk to you, you either turned away or walked away completely. It hurt him terribly. He couldn’t understand what had changed so fast. He chased you around the halls for days, trying his hardest to get your attention. But it never worked. And so, his love for you began to fade into an awful rage.

He couldn’t let you just walk away from everything the two of you shared. You were his. Only his. He couldn’t let you leave him, not like his dad. He hadn’t spent his entire life chasing you just to end up losing you. No. So, he began to formulate a plan. He’d leave you alone for a few days then calmly ask you to meet him at the beach, in the special spot he once made for you.

He wasn’t surprised that his plan worked. You were predictable.

When the night came, he made sure he was prepared. He snorted a line, packed his bag full of your favorite things, and set off. As he walked down the beach, he made sure the knife he hid was secure in his pocket. It was smaller than the one he’d used on David, but it would do the job just as efficiently.

You arrived a few minutes after him, a sad expression on your pretty face. He fought the urge to run to you with open arms.

“Thank you for coming,” he said. Only a few feet separated your bodies, he wished he could close it. But he needed to be patient.

You took a deep breath, you looked nervous. “Yeah, look Tate I... I’ve thought about it and I... I really think we should stop seeing each other for some time.”

“Why Y/N? I love you, so fucking much. I’m sorry for what I said, I can change, I won’t say shit like that ever again. I’ll be gentle, I swear. Just give me the chance I can be whatever you need me to be,” he replied desperately. He opened his bag and pulled out your favorite candy. “I love you; I really do. Please give me another chance.”

He watched your eyes fill with tears. You wanted to give in, he could see it in your eyes. But you only shook your head and wiped a fallen tear from your cheek.

“No. I’m sorry. Tate, you aren’t gentle, that’s not who you are. And I don’t want you to pretend to be someone you aren’t.”

Tate swallowed hard. “You promised me you’d never leave me; you said you were nothing like my dad. Was it all a lie?”

“Of course not!” You exclaimed and took a step closer to him. “I love you; I really do. That’s why this is so hard.”

“If you love me, why can’t we work this out? Don’t lie to me Y/N.”

He couldn’t stop his eyes from watering, nor could he stop his lips from quivering. He dug the bouquet of your favorite flowers out from his bag and held them out to you.

“Please,” he mumbled. “I need you.”

You caved. You wrapped your arms around his waist and held him tight. He could feel your muffled cries on his chest, it pained him. You were a sensitive sweet girl; it was both your blessing and curse.

“Maybe in a few months, we can try again, I don’t know.” You looked up at him with bloodshot eyes. “We just can’t be together right now. And I mean we’re going to graduate soon, and I might go to a college far away, how would that even work? But I don’t want to hurt you.”

“It’s too late for that Y/N, you’ve already hurt me.” He dropped what he was holding and dug one of his hands into his pocket. He touched your face with his other hand, your tears covering his palm. “You’ve planned on leaving me this whole time. I wanted to give it another try you’ve made up your mind. I guess it just comes down to one thing.”

“What?” You asked.

“If I can’t have you, no one can,” he whispered before he pulled out the knife and plunged it into the side of your neck.

~~~

2011

“I killed you because I loved you,” he answers. “Because you were going to leave me and find someone else.”

All you can do is stare at him in silence. You think back to everything that happened. How could you have been so blind? It couldn’t have been your fault though. He would’ve killed you anyway. You think back to all the times Tate made you uneasy, all the times he would say things that creeped you out. Deep down you must’ve known that’s who he is. Maybe you knew all along.

Maybe you loved him because of his darkness.

You exhale a long breath. “We don’t have that long till midnight.”

“So?”

You shrug. “Wanna hook up?”

213 notes · View notes

decembercamiecherries · 3 months

Text

Killugon fanfic recs!

While answering an anon ask I realized I wanted to talk some more about my favorite hxh killugon fics! Specifically the ones that I don’t think show up as much on rec lists but I still adore and have bookmarked on my own ao3 page. So here we are!

All of these fics have less than 1k kudos! I’m including the link, title, author, length, au tags and a general review. Enjoy~

One Flew East, One Flew West by Senket

31k words, 1 chapter

Mental institution/modern au

This is one of those really long one shots that goes by soooo quickly and you’re shocked and super sad when it’s over. The climax made my heart a c h e. Also I love how obsessed Gon and Killua are pretty much immediately lol.

winner x winner by Miah_Kat

2k words, 1 chapter

Post-canon AU

Fun, short and intense. You can really feeeeel how much Gon and Killua want each other in this fic, it made me want to scream into my pillow in the best way!

worth it by Alabaster_Gunship (nimery)

16.6k words, 1 chapter

Soulmate/what if AU

Obsessed with this particular soulmate au because it doesn’t follow canon events in the sense that Gon and Killua meet as adults rather than kids. Gon chases after Killua when Killua refuses to be with him, Killua stands up to Illumi when Illumi threatens Gon, their connection is immediate and intimate at the same time…I love it thank you.

to the moon and to Saturn by tomiawka

95k words, 10 chapters

Modern childhood friends AU

I remember reading this fic as it updated weekly because I liked it so much that I couldn’t wait until the whole fic was complete to read it. The climax really hurt but like 90% of this fic is pure fluff, seriously Gon and Killua are so cute in this fic.

missing you is a slow burn by mysteryburn

10.8k words, 1 chapter

Canon universe/post-canon AU

30 snippets about killugon that made me cry, laugh, get choked up, smile, and so much more. Reading this fic felt like a religious experience because it is just so beautifully written.

harbor lights by balconys

1.2k words, 1 chapter

Canon universe/post-canon AU

Kind of similar to the above fic, this is a 30 sentence fic of various killugon moments at various stages of their friendship/relationship. It’s shocking how much of a punch each of these sentences give in the best possible way. I hope I can convey such specific emotions in such little words one day.

the hormonal high schooler’s guide to falling in love series by perennials, specifically part 1 and 3

10.1k words, 5 parts

Modern high school au

Gon is like…super intense in these fics and he is 100000% focused on Killua and getting romantically involved with him, which is exactly my favorite kind of dynamic. Gon is the star of a sports team while Killua is student president so it’s got some good jockxnerd vibes going on.

#fanfic rec #killugon #hunterxhunter #this was fun

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lolamarlowe65 · 1 year

Text

Slash x reader

“𝓜𝔂 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓽𝓷𝓮𝓻 𝓲𝓷 𝓬𝓻𝓲𝓶𝓮, 𝓶𝔂 𝓲𝓷𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓲𝓽𝔂 𝓭𝓸𝓾𝓫𝓵𝓮.”

“She can take my soul for the record, I don’t give a shit.”

one shot x reader

disclaimers : age gap (modern day slash), smut, thigh riding, unprotected sex, overstimulation, slash’s feral internal dialogue, cursing, smoking, rough stuff, grown girls stuff <33

4.6k words

AO3 link

iii];)’ .・• ✰ ⋆

y/n pov

I started to work as a staff member for Guns n’Roses a few months ago. Everything is great as fuck. The music, the job, the mood all around the band. In overall, everything is going well. My relationships with the band members were super friendly and they made me feel quickly as if I was part of the gang. But there is one thing. One person. Him. Slash. The moment I started my job here he immediately started teasing me. Nothing big. He tells me how much of a weird chick I am, he gives me smug smiles anytime he sees me as a way of saying “here comes the freak”. It has never felt as if he hates me or anything, it just amuses him to see me rolling my eyes to his puns. When I first discovered Slash, I admit that I developed a crush on him, you know the “rockstar crush”. I didn’t start to work here for that, but seeing him almost everyday was definitely a plus, well, if he didn’t drive me crazy with his provocations. It is a plus, yes, but I actually never thought of trying anything with him. I am a younger chick in whom he’d see no interest, apart from a way of having fun. I wouldn’t mind but that would be too complicated to manage with this job. Honestly, most of the time, his jokes make me laugh. I look at him with a pissed off grin and say “haha” or I stick out my tongue. It became a game between us. To the words of Duff “leave the girl alone man”. Apparently, Slash doesn’t listen to his best friend’s advice because he never stops. If we weren’t so different or if I knew him a little better I would say he’s flirting with me. “What a weird chick you are.” sounds like a love declaration coming from a man with such an attraction for creepy stuff. I do think about it as flirting sometimes. Mostly the days when I'm not in the mood for his jokes I imagine he’s flirting with me, helps me to not actually kill him. Being with a man like him wouldn’t bother me, actually, I would love it. He isn’t only hot and cool. He is interesting, passionate, peaceful but wild and genuinely beautiful. Beautiful on the inside and on the outside.

I am a person that’s pretty impulsive. When I feel frustrated, I will go for it, even if it means breaking my own promises. I try to hold myself back, but I have no desire to be perfect. I smoke, I have a high body count, anger issues, I keep doing the same shits over and over again and failing. But I also have skills that I don’t hide, I am strong minded and the way I see it : it has never really helped me with my relationships to people. Especially men. Labeling me “weird chick” is not original Saul. I’m sure most women are like me. But the world doesn’t see it I guess.

Today, I am not in the mood. We’ve got some problems with the gears, the venue isn’t ready and my hormones are working on me. Everything in me is boiling, every emotion. I can manage my emotions and impulses, hormones are not an excuse to be an asshole. But in this type of job, you have to take a lot of shit from people you don’t like so the band themselves don’t have to. Granted, they had to confront them in order to make their band what it is today but man, this isn’t easy. So, as for today, frustration will be my motto. One person pisses me off, I will send them to their grave.

As if it wasn’t enough, we’ve asked me to bring some guitar gear in Slash’s backstage room. I have purposely avoided him since the start of my shift, which is not easy when you are working for him. So far it seems to work, changing hallways last minute, not going to the crowded places and most importantly, his backstage room. From the glimpses of him I saw thorough the day I could tell you how beautiful he looked. He always does, but today it’s working on me. Which is frustrating me even more because I want to see him as much as I want to avoid him. His style didn’t change much from any other day, the sunglasses, the leather jacket, the hat and one of those shirts he has the secret of. It’s just that today is a day where my mind said fuck off to any type of morals I may try to have and I have to manage it as best as I can.

Before going into his backstage room, I made sure he wasn’t around. As I enter the room and leave his gear I can’t help but stop in front of the mirror before heading out. I contemplate my reflection, my eyes lingering over my body. The sadder part with those days is that I feel like I can’t and will never be understood or loved. This doesn’t bother me the majority of the time because it’s probably true and I have made peace with it a long time ago. My emotions are on the verge on days like those, so I let myself grief this fact. I wouldn’t say I look beautiful. I wouldn’t say I am satisfied with my life right now. Even if it is going slowly in the right direction. I let out a tear thinking of all this and whip it away quickly.

“- Looking good y/n, trying to cosplay a zombie?” Slash laughs.

Shit. Just what I fucking needed.

“- Not today Saul.” i answer, rolling my eyes.

He is standing right behind me, I can see his smug smile and I know his eyes are playful even if they are hidden behind sunglasses.

“- Wow, Saul? Did somebody give you food after midnight?” he jokes.

I turn around and look at him with defiant eyes. He needs to be teached a lesson. You don’t piss y/n off like that. Slash or not Slash. I don’t know what I am about to do, but that’s definitely going to be interesting.

“- Fuck you. Did it ever occur to you that your teasing game might piss me off?” i ask, sassily.

“- And what are you going to do about it?” he teases, again, big smile on his lips.

“- Well… I could do that.” i say in a provocative tone.

I slowly wrap my fingers around the sides of his sunglasses and remove them off his face. I let them fall on the floor. I want to stay defiant to his eyes, I want to keep holding his gaze. Being nice and clean, putting away his sunglasses nicely is not in my scenario today. There’s a look I have never seen on him before. A fire in his eyes. He holds my gaze as hard as I hold his. My breath becomes heavier as I approach my lips dangerously to his. I can feel his chest go up and down heavily. It’s working.

“- See. Pretty annoying right?” i smile.

Fuck. The swift of breath from his lips too close to my smile is actually going to drive ME crazy. What an ass. Making me feel this way. I must stay focused. He smiles back at me, hinting his approval. He understood that we entered a game and he is letting me play. Let’s see how much I can push him before I make him mad. He doesn’t say a word, waiting for my next move. I step back and close the door. I remark that Slash is studying me, looking at my body, his stare lingering over my ass and hips. At this instant, the teasing game turned into lust.

I breathe heavily, getting him to stare back into my eyes.

“- Careful where your eyes linger big boy.” i incite, biting my lower lip.

I approach him again, purposely making him take a step back in the direction of the couch behind him.

“- I could also do that.” i smirk.

I grab his crotch. His cock hardens immediately at my grip. My pussy gets wet at this simple touch. I didn’t know how much teasing and keeping a person on edge could make me feel that much desire. Or maybe it’s Slash. Probably both, this raw, pure, lustful desire. Everything in my head is torn apart and I question everything. Did he start teasing just for fun or was he trying to hold back everything I am about to unleash right now. Was it his way of making me a part of his life? And why didn’t he make me understand this obvious desire we have for each other earlier. Fuck. I need him.

I hear him groan and get even bigger in the cup of my hand. I push him on the couch. A big guy like him wouldn’t flinch from a light push from me. I’m not weak but I did not push him very strongly. He let himself be pushed, waiting for my next move. His legs are spread and I take a seat on one of his thighs.

“- I don’t know what you want from me Saul, but I will take what I want. Is that okay?” i ask languorously.

He doesn’t talk, he just bops his head with an audacious smile, answering affirmatively to my question.

“- Good.” i chuckle.

I dispose my lips on his neck. Biting slightly making sure to leave all the spots my lips went to stay wet with my taste. I start kissing his face, all the spots I can, expect his lips, leaving him on edge, teasing him. As I do just that, I start rubbing my clothed cunt against his thigh. I feel him gasp, both for the frustration on his lips and in his pants. I leave a mark in his neck, right under his ear only for me to go above and nip alternatively on both his ears.

“- Mmmh… Fuck.” i curse in between moans.

I rub against his thigh ruthlessly, my thrusts are short but harsh and my pleasure grows more and more. My back arch and I end up using my hands to support myself on his shoulders. I throw my head back and I hear Slash groan. A frustrated groan, making me even more thrilled. Knowing that at this right moment I own him just for my only pleasure makes me even more horny. His thigh is so comfortable, imagining how his pretty cock must be almost brings me to my release.

It’s getting harder for me to hold on. I don’t want him to touch me, I want to keep him on his limit so I take it upon myself and rub as good as I can on his leg.

“- Saul! Fuck that’s good!” i cry.

I pant heavily and I feel my jeans getting soaked with my cum. My legs shake and squeeze around Saul’s leg and my cheeks are all blushed with my effort.

I won.

Slash looks like he is about to explode. Good for him. He looks mesmerized and embittered. That’s what you get for being a little bitch like that. A wild mess lost in his thought. What a magnificent view.

I kiss his lips very quickly and lightly before smiling while putting myself together. Even if this kiss was quick, I had never felt such soft comfortable lips.

“- See. That’s what you get for teasing me.” i playfully say, getting off him.

Saul stays still on the couch, his eyes on fire and I walk toward the door, happy to have pushed his limit, ready to resist his game.

Slash pov

What a fucking bitch. A beautiful mess, out of breath and still taking away mine. She is lighting herself a cigarette. Like she is gonna get away with this. I can’t hold on anymore, I have to make her mine. I have to have her all for me, I have to fuck her and make her come again but this time around my cock. I have to make her my girl.

Truth is, ever since she started working here she drives me crazy. She is one of those women that don’t give a shit. She has no mind about being perfect, she’s completely detached from reality, she does her things and she doesn’t take shit. She’s a weird chick some might say, but I absolutely adore creepy shits. Her wilderness and emotions are always so honest. I have held back for the past few months because she’s much younger than me. I’ve never felt as if I was worth dating a chick like her and I was sure she would say no. I’d rather tease her and at least have some kind of interactions with her than avoid her all the time.

Before she could open the door I push her against the wall. Her eyes look like a lost puppy. I take the cigarette out of her mouth and throw it in the ashtray on the table. She had all the time she needed to get away, but she stayed here. Back against the wall still high on her orgasm. Watching her pleasuring herself on my thigh was both a torture and delight. I wanted to touch her and make her come with my hands. She refused and left me on edge. The only thought in my head was among the lines of “What a bitch, I want her.” I come back to her and put one of my hands on her waist pushing her more against the wall and the other in her neck, my fingers playing with her jawline. I breathe close to her mouth for a few seconds, teasing her as she did. She seems to take frustration way harder than me because she looks pissed and starved, and this makes me even more out of my mind. I take her lips hungrily, I kiss her, starving for her tongue. Fuck, I shouldn’t be so crazy about her but here she is, moaning in my mouth begging for my tongue to play with hers. Such soft lips. So tender and matching mine perfectly.

“- You shouldn’t have done that y/n. I will not let you get away, so if you wanna go, go now.” i say to her, drunk on her scent.

She moans as I take the back of her thighs and wrap her legs around me. Still against the wall, I wait for her answer while kissing her collarbone.

“- Hmmm… do it.” she almost whispers.

“- Do what?” i tease.

“- For Christ’s sake! Do it! Fuck me fuckhead!” she laments.

“- Your desires are orders madam.” i answer her playfully, smiling in the crook of her neck.

I go back to her mouth, mixing my tongue with hers while I tease her thighs with my hands. I can feel her wet cunt on my lower stomach and her laments desperate to deal with this ache. To hell with it. She deserves it. I rip her thin shirt away to expose her tits to me. She will take my shirt. Fuck it. She doesn’t wear a bra and I can access her perfect tits immediately. I lick and bite them mercilessly, teasing her more and more. I can’t wait to enter her but I just want to hear her beg for me.

“- Saul… mmhm… stop.. mmh… fucking around… mmhm… and fuck me already!” she pants, out of breath.

“- I fucking love the way you curse all the time.” i tell her, biting the skin around her nipple.

I remove her pants and underwear. What a pretty sight. What a pretty cunt. I could make this my meal for the rest of my life. I’d never starve. I put her back against the wall. I want to show her how bad I’ve wanted her for the last months. I want to show her what I wanted to do to her every time she’d pass over me in a hallway. How hungry, how bad I have been craving her. I unbuckle my pants and let my dick free. Her eyes got bigger and she opened her mouth to the view of my hard cock. She looks at it like she got to have a taste of her favorite meal and it drives me crazy. I give her no time to comment before I push her head against the wall kissing her lips as I bury myself deep inside of her. She’s so fucking wet. Fucking hell. I know I’m stretching her out. I can feel it. I love it.

“- SAUL!” she gasps, gripping my back. “It’s so fucking big!”

“- Shh.. I know you can take it. Scream if you need to baby, I don’t give a shit if we hear us.” i answer, moving in and out of her.

I pound into her fast and hard, making her moan each time I shove myself deep into her. She’s so damn hot. She feels so good. That’s it. I’m taking her with me. Her face becomes a mess as she cannot seem to catch her breath correctly. Between kisses, her mouth stays wide open, sometimes, she bites her lips, letting out small whimpers. I love it rough and she’ll love it too. I can tell she already does.

“- Saul… aahh.. that’s fucking good aaahh don’t stop.” she screams.

See? Told you. I give her one last hard pound and lift her up grabbing the back of her thighs. I’m still inside her, my cock hitting her deep every step I take. Her little whines are a melody I am more than happy to work on. She tries her best to hold onto me and makes my hat fall as she moves her arms around my neck. Whatever man, I have been wearing this hat since ages, her, it’s the first time. As I throw her on the couch my dick slips out of her, leaving me without her. What kind of fucking witch is she? Seconds out of her and my cock already misses her cunt.

“- Turn around.” i command, removing my shirt.

She smiles defiantly and executes herself. I waste no time and shove my dick back into her as I push as deep as I can. I keep her head buried in the couch as I mercilessly pound into her. I hear her whimper in pleasure. My mouth next to her ear, laughing, biting it slightly.

“- This is what you fucking get when you’re being a bitch.” i whisper in her ear.

I continue my rough pounding leaving trails of kisses all along her back. I know I’m about to come, how can I not when I’m banging her? Trust me though, I’m far from being finished with her.

“- AAH SAUL! I’M COMING! PLEASE! COME IN ME! FUCKING DO!” i hear her scream, muffled on the couch.

Just what I fucking needed. Hell yeah I will my love.

Not long after I come into her pussy still pounding as I feel her legs shake and her cunt getting tighter. She fucking came all over my cock. Just like I said I wanted her to. I grab her by the hair and bring her to my chest. She turns her head to me. She’s a mess with her hair all over her face, sticking with her sweat. Out of breath and panting for air. So beautiful. So fucking beautiful, as usual. I give her a wet sloppy kiss, removing the hair out of her face.

“- Good girl.” i tease into her ear.

I put her back on my side and lift her up again to sit her on the table. I still need her. I’m hard again like a fucking horny teenager. She makes me into this sex depraved slave succubuses love so much. She can take my soul for the record, I don’t give a shit. She can be the devil, a witch or an alien. To me, she's first and for all the woman I want, the one I desire and I want to be with. Bitch, witch, baby. Something like that. And in her eyes, I’m probably just the fucking dumbass who dared touching her. That’s okay. I’m cool with it. If she always looks at me the way she does now, I’m cool with it.

Sucking on her tits, I shove myself into her again, immediately pounding her hard. Her legs shake uncontrollably so I lock them up around my waist. She lies down on the table playing with her tits, moaning and biting her lips.

“- Oh my god that’s so good. Aaahh… Continue.” she cries.

Putting my hand around her neck I bring her back to my chest. Her back arches frantically at every movement I do inside her. So that’s why she was lying down. I slow down and move little by little inside of her to see how she moves her ass and back around on the table.

“- FUCKING STOP THE TEASING ASSHOLE… AAAH” she whimpers.

She puts her arms behind my neck and lets her nails sink into my back. With her head buried in the crook of my neck I laugh and go back to my hard pace. Hearing her little cries makes me the happiest man on earth. I hold her with one hand on her back and the other in the back of her head. At this instant, it’s like she is all mine. Like she could break if I let her go.

“- There babygirl, take it all, like the good slut you are. I know you love it, don't hold back.” i kiss her forehead before leaving her head to fall back in my neck.

“- AAH FUCK YES THAT’S GOOD! I’M SO FF-UUL IT’S SO B-BIG!” she whimpers.

Her fucking voice drives me crazy. She bites and teases my neck violently as a way to show me she is still holding on. I’m sure my back is all scratched and marked by now, but i’ll let her take everything off of me if it means I can get to fuck her brains out like right now. I groan, knowing I'm almost there, when I feel her legs squeeze around my waist and her back arch I know she’s also about to come again. I embrace her tightly as I screw her as fast and deep as I can.

“- AH…MHH… HAA… HM… SAUL… YES! YES! YES!” she comes screaming my name.

I come in her again. She stays like that for a few minutes. Panting, all naked into my arms. I hear her broken voice laugh slightly.

“- So that was it… all this teasing.” she laughs again.

“- You have no idea how much I wanted to fuck your brains out, teasing me back like that was not a good idea.” i answer.

“- Oh it definitely was a good idea. And I’ll do it again.”

“- No need to. I’m not letting you go. You’re mine now.”

She moves around to be able to look at me in the eyes. Her arms still wrapped around my neck and her cheeks still all flustered.

“- I am?” she smirks.

This smirk could make me fuck her again right now. Yes she is. I have been tortured by her presence for the past few months, now that she’s here I'm not letting her go. I move around to get a cloth to clean her up with. When I go back to her I catch her shy smile as she turns her head on the side.

“- Okay.” she almost whispers, smiling slightly.

I can’t resist taking her chin to turn her head to me to kiss her deeply. There was a chance it was a pure unique act of lust for her. A chance she’d left and say “never again”. A chance I’d taste her pussy only once with my cock, trying to forget how much I want to eat her out. A chance she’d realize I was older than her and she’d get away from me. Looking at the clock on the wall I realize it’s time for the show. What a great fucking day. Fucking the chick I’ve been thinking off non stop since months, playing on stage and then get back to fucking her. The two things I love the most. After the show, I’ll steal her away and get her back with me. What the fuck is the manager gonna tell me anyway? They don’t need her as much as I do.

“- Show’s gonna start baby. Let’s get the job done.” i wink, my hands resting on her waist.

I take my shirt and put it on her. God she looks so hot in my shirt. She should only wear that. She gives me a doubtful stare.

“- It’s okay, I’m hot anyway.” i smile.

Her gaze is playful as she goes down on her knees. She licks her lips and grabs my penis in her hand. She kisses slowly the tip of my cock. I take a deep breath and her smile goes feeble.

“- See you later big boy.” she brightens up again.

Bitch.

There she puts it back in my pants to only leave me my belt to put back on. Bitch. She’s lucky I can hide my bulge behind my guitar, she’s lucky we don’t have time. On the floor, I see her grab her thong that she slides into my pocket.

“- Eye for an eye.” she teases.

This isn’t fair. I give her my shirt, she gives me a piece of art. Putting her pants back on, I light her cigarette again and put it in her mouth.

“- Always finish what you started.” i say, getting her hair out of her face.

“- Whatever.” she rolls her eyes. “Go do your job.” she stops. “Play as good as you always do.” she smiles, cupping my face in her hands.

“- Coldness with a tinge of consideration, exactly what I love.” i kiss her neck, before letting her slip away to get out.

I hear her laugh evaporate as she disappears in the hallway. I know she’s playing around, she stays composed like her legs weren’t still shaking seconds from now. How fucking cool she is.

The show went great. When I get back backstage I see her there, cheering the end of this awesome show. She put on a leather jacket. After the show, we generally answer interviews and talk with some fans to end up having a little party all together. Not as wild as in my 20s, but still not very well-behaved. Tonight, I don’t give a shit, I have other businesses to attend. I greet the guys and let them know I’m going.

“- Where you going man, something to do?” Duff asks me.

I arrive in front of y/n and lift her up over my shoulder. She gasps and laughs.

“- Yeah man, something urgent! Might take me a long time, might kill me. Just in case, y’all can start looking for a new lead!”

“- Dumbass.” i hear her answer, which makes me laugh.

I fucking love her bitchy tone.

I admit. She won.

y/n pov

Here I am, being carried around like a sack of potatoes by the man I thought I could never have. I had the best sex of my life and something tells me I’m about to get it again. If I knew, I would have teased him back a long time ago. He said I was his.

In truth, he’s mine.

iii];)’ .・• ✰ ⋆

“Face of an angel with the love of a witch”.

A/N : i wrote that when i was horny as hell, clearly came from my delusions, i love the idea of slash having this feral internal dialogue because he just wants you so bad! enjoy loves <33 (slash if you read this i’m ready for your love ;))

#slash fanfiction #slash gnr #slash fic #slash smut #slash #slash x reader #slash x you #gnr smut #gnr x reader #gnr fanfiction #gnr fic #slash imagine #guns n roses #guns n roses smut #guns n roses fanfic #guns n roses fanfiction #velvet revolver #saul hudson

922 notes · View notes

aus-wnt · 3 months

Text

Matildas star Steph Catley was at a training camp for club side Arsenal when a nutritionist blurted out the news: Sam Kerr had ruptured her ACL while at a Chelsea training camp in Morocco.

“I literally felt like someone had stabbed me in the stomach,” Catley said.

“My stomach fell. I just felt really emotional really quickly just because I felt really removed from it and I couldn’t go and see her and I couldn’t speak to her in that moment.”

Women’s soccer is booming. Before her injury, Kerr, the Matildas captain, and Catley, the vice captain, were part of an Australian side that captured the nation’s attention in the Women’s World Cup in 2023. The Arsenal defender then flew back to London where she played in front of record crowds in the Women’s Super League, including 59,042 at the Emirates Stadium against Kerr’s Chelsea in December.

But that boom is hiding a serious issue.

As a female athlete, Catley is no stranger to serious injuries among her peers. As well as Kerr’s injury, Holly McNamara was called up for the Matildas last year but did her ACL. At Arsenal alone, four stars suffered ACL injuries in the space of just six months: Lionesses captain Leah Williamson, WSL’s record goalscorer Vivianne Miedema, European Championship Golden Boot winner Beth Mead and Austrian international Laura Wienroither.

Catley says the foundations of women’s soccer are not developing fast enough to keep pace with the product.

“Obviously it’s what we absolutely love doing, but I think now that the game is at a point where the standard is so, so high and the games are so challenging and physically demanding [that] a lot of teams and a lot of clubs don’t have facilities and don’t have the right calibre of staff that can keep players healthy and strong,” she said.

“They don’t have the facilities to cater for the amount of demand and the pressures that are on the women’s game now.”

On the eve of Williamson’s return to the playing squad late last month, the 26-year-old defender said the current calendar and demands on female footballers were unsustainable.

“We’re not bred for this. We get to October and girls are saying ‘I’m tired’ because you’re carrying so much from the previous season,” Williamson told UK’s The Telegraph.

“We are driving ourselves into the ground, so some sort of solution needs to be found soon, in terms of the schedule, otherwise it’s not sustainable.”

ACL ruptures disproportionately affect female athletes at a rate 3-6 times greater than their male counterparts.

Research into ACL injury prevention and causation is ongoing and newer reports suggest an intersection of risk factors of intrinsic (anatomy, physiology, biomechanics and hormones) and extrinsic factors (training, conditioning, preparation, facilities and resources).

While Catley was hesitant to speak on the causation of ACL ruptures as she was not an injury expert, she said there was no room to properly switch off mentally or physically on the merry-go-round of the calendar year, putting a lot of strain on the resources available.

“I don’t know if A, B and C leads to this. But yeah, it does logically make sense that if there’s that much demand and not enough support and not enough foundations underneath that people break down mentally, physically, in every way possible,” said Catley.

“I think that’s human and that’s the way bodies work.”

Some English clubs can play as many as three games a week during the height of the season when the WSL, Champions League, FA Cup and League Cup calendars are running concurrently. The additional travel, plus the demands of national camps and tournaments, can further complicate schedules. Major tournaments occur in most WSL off-seasons, including a rotation of Olympics, World Cup and regional championships such as the Asian Cup, meaning most players will get one off-season free every four years.

When Matildas defender Ellie Carpenter ruptured her ACL just over a year out from the World Cup during Lyon’s Women’s Champions League final win over Barcelona, she referred to it months later as a “blessing in disguise”.

“I really needed this break. I was very fatigued, I’ve played a lot – a lot – of football in the last year and a half. I was just on the verge of [being] burnt out, really,” she told Forbes last March.

“The injury came, and, obviously, it was disappointing but at the same time, it was the perfect time for me to reset, get stronger, have a rest, have an off-season that I never really have had.”

In Kerr’s absence, Catley will captain the Matildas for the final Olympic qualifiers in Melbourne on February 24 and 28 against Uzbekistan and, if they progress, again at the Olympics in July. Catley did the same in Kerr’s absence for the first half of the World Cup.

Catley said as a kid, she never thought captaining a women’s team at the Olympics would even be possible. But now it is, it’s a “pinch me” moment.

“To be honest, even having that honour at the World Cup was extremely special and something that I’ll remember for the rest of my life, and cherish for the rest of my life, because it’s stuff that you dream of, really.”

But before she flies to Melbourne, for a 48-hour stop to play the first qualifier, she is deep in the thick of an Arsenal campaign for the title.

The club is looking almost back to full strength after regaining Mead, Miedema and Williamson this season, and sit third on the table, below Chelsea and Manchester City.

Catley said the title race was heating up. And while in the past seasons her side has struggled in those bigger games, this year they’ve done well against top opponents – but let others slip that they’d usually win. This is best summed up by their 4-1 win over Chelsea in December and then a 1-0 loss to Tottenham the following week. On Sunday, they lost to relegation-threatened West Ham.

“You’ve got some incredible teams that are also in form and if anyone drops points at any point, it’s like sharks,” said Catley.

“It’s just so, so close.”

#steph catley #arsenal women #arsenal wfc #matildas #auswnt

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peachesofteal · 10 months

Note

ok but hear me, this can either be dead disco or the baby trap.

Simon and Johnny either following Darling around scared they gonna leave or one of them always HAS to be near them.

Darling escaped once and they won’t let it happen again

Screams! I love this. Love your brain. I took this in a slight different direction also, but these themes still persist. 🩵

Mature Themes / disco baby au

Simon and Johnny are a mess.

They haven’t always been like this. Hovering and overly watchful, like this. Bordering on paranoid, anxious, high strung. Jumpy, almost. They don’t let you out of their sight. They don’t let you go anywhere without at least one of the them. They won’t even let you go down to the front door to grab the Chinese delivery.

At first you didn’t notice anything different, really. They’ve always been very attuned to you, very attached. It wasn’t abnormal for Johnny to cling to you like a barnacle for days after coming home from an op, only peeling away when he absolutely had to. They’ve always been around whenever you needed something, always been able to anticipate your wants and desires, always taken care of you, when they’re home. But this… this is different.

But now, it’s all starting to feel… suffocating. Just a little.

It started with your commute to work. You usually walk the few blocks to the train stop, and then ride the E line all the way in to your office, reverse for the way home. You’ve always gotten to work this way, without issue, and you’ve never considered it to pose one, until the morning Johnny walked you the entire way.

“What’re you doing?” You eye him curiously as you slide on your black boots, the ones with the short, chunky heel, the height just enough to keep your pants elevated from the wet sidewalks and streets.

“Walking to the stop with ye?” He quips, like it’s obvious, and you can feel the tug of the sour frown on your lips. Why is he walking you to the train? He never does that.

“You don’t need to… I’m fine on my own.” The last sip of decaf washes down your throat, and you reach for your bag.

“I know, still…” he trails off, and his hand folds over yours, rubbing a thumb across your knuckles before sliding your grip free, and pulling the black bag into his own. He steps closer, and closer, until you can feel the heat of his breath, the warmth of his skin on yours. He cups a hand over your belly, sliding up and down before lowering his mouth to yours sweetly, pressing his lips against for you a long kiss. “Gotta take care of you two.” He says when he pulls away, and you can’t stop the playful eye roll that comes as a response.

“Okay, fine.”

You let it go, because you didn’t mind the extra company, and it wasn’t like he was getting on the train with you. Just walking you to and from the stop. Every day. Rain or shine.

You had assured them both, a week later, that no one needed to walk the few blocks with you, but Simon shook his head immediately, squashing your insistence, and you dropped it.

And then, a few days later, you tried to go to the grocery store.

“Don’t cry, love. Please don’t cry.” Johnny begs, eyes wide with concern, while Simon sits next to you, soft hand on your neck.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I just… I have all these emotions and they feel so strong right now.” Hormones. That’s what you blamed mostly everything on right now, the baby making you feel somewhat crazy, crazier than you normally feel.

“It’s alright.” Simon tries to soothe you, and you nod before leaning over into his chest. There’s some shifting, and then Johnny is cuddled up on your other side, arms holding you firmly.

You sit there for a while, until you feel composed, until your heart rate is normal, your breathing even and head clear.

“Okay.” You sniffle and wipe your nose with a laugh. “Okay. I’m okay. I’m going to get going.”

“Get going?” Simon poses the question with an eyebrow.

“Yeah, I was going to the grocery store… remember?” You gesture to the pile of canvas bags on the table, and Johnny frowns.

“I can go for you, darling.”

“No, I want to go. It’ll be good, get some fresh air. Get out of the flat.” Simon stills, muscles zinging into stone, lines of his face shifting until they’re frozen. The scar on his chin shines in the low light of the lamp, and you watch the sheen of the pink flesh move when his teeth grind.

“I’ll go with you.”

“You hate the store. And it’s not-“

“I don’t mind.” He responds instantly, and you shrug.

He keeps a hand on you the entire time. Firm pressure on the small of your back as you walk, arm around your waist as you stand in front of the dairy fridge. He takes up so much space, it makes everyone else circumvent around you, and when he scowls at them, they scurry in opposite directions.

“Are you… is everything, okay?” You’re hesitant with the question, and he looks down in concern.

“Of course, are you alright?”

“I’m fine… you just seem. On edge.” He rolls his neck and then shakes his head no, before pulling the now full canvas bag from your hands.

“Everything is alright, darling. Don’t worry.” You can’t help but give him a skeptical look, before sighing, turning away to start towards the yogurt. You rub your belly absentmindedly, eyeing the ice cream, when you feel something bump you, the hard edge of metal in your back, like a trolley, and you turn to see a teenager with a gobsmacked look on his face.

“So sorry, I didn’t mean-“ the kid tries to get out his apology but it’s far too late, Simon’s already corralling you in his arms, pulling you away and into him while openly glaring at the scared teen.

“Watch where yer bloody walking.” He hisses, and you can see the harsh line of his jaw just beneath the mask, veins in his arms flaring to life with his anger.

“Hey, Si.” You rub his forearm, trying to pull his attention from where the kid stands, practically shaking in fear. “I’m fine. Nothing happened.” You give the kid a jerk of your head, the ‘get lost’ signal, and he scampers off without another word. “I’m okay. He hardly bumped me.” You whisper, folding your hand into his and tugging him closer. His gaze is locked to the teenager’s retreating back, until he snaps out of it, eyes finding yours with soft relief. “See?” You flourish your arms like you’re on display, and he rubs his face tiredly.

“Yeah. I see.”

After that… everything seemed to ramp up. Johnny would ride the train with you now, not just walk you to the stop. If you went for a walk, like your doctor instructed you should still be doing, they were hot on your heels. If you wanted to go out for something, like to run an errand, one of them was with you, like a shadow. It was consistent. Non stop. Suffocating.

And you let it build up. You let the hovering and following and everything go on and on until you couldn’t anymore. Until it all exploded.

You stop dead on the path, gravel crunching under the heel of your sneaker.

“What is going on with you two?” You demand, turning to face them both, fully. Johnny holds a water bottle out to you helplessly, like he thinks it will help quell your irritation, and you glare at it.

“What do you mean?”

“Something is wrong. Or off. You’re both… hovering. More than usual. More than… well, normal.”

“No we’re not.” Johnny denies and you scoff.

“Yeah, okay. Why are you lying?” When they stay silent, observing you, withholding from you, you feel the tears start to sting along your waterline.

“Oh darling, no. Please, don’t cry.”

“I thought we’re supposed to b-be honest with each other, and that’s clearly not what’s happening here.” You cry, fat tears now dripping down your cheeks, pressure in your chest mounting as you grapple with whatever it could be that they’re hiding.

“It’s not-“ Johnny starts but is cut off by Simon.

“We’re worried.”

“About what?”

“You. Us. Everything thing… it’s, this. Is a lot. For anyone.” A lot. A lot? A lot for you, maybe. Not so much for them. The bitter thought sinks like lead in your stomach. This was an accident. No one meant for this to happen, relax.

Still, it’s not like they were pregnant.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“We just worry, about everything. About you, and the baby. If something were to happen…” Johnny trails off, uncomfortable look on his face.

“We worry about you, darling.” Simon approaches you softly. “We worry it’s too much, about how you’re faring, if you’re overwhelmed, if you’re feeling like this is too much, if you might want to run-“

Oh.

They’re worried you might bolt. Worried you might pack up and leave.

“I see.” The truth can sting, sometimes. When it comes from them, when it feels like they have so little faith in you.

You don’t respond, just rub an anxious palm over your belly while you wipe your tears with your free hand and hiccup through your tears.

“That’s what you think of me? That I’ll just… up and leave?” You leave the ‘again’ off the end of that question, because no one needs the reminder.

“No!”

“No.” Simon shakes his head. “No, darling. We’re sorry. We’re just… on edge. It’s a big thing, that’s happening.” You laugh a little, and step forward, just close enough for touch. Simon rubs your back, while Johnny rests your head on his shoulder.

“Yeah. Really big thing… we’re having a baby.”

#peaches asks #mothcelestial #peaches writes #disco baby au

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softlymaximoff · 11 months

Text

Her Howl

18+ ONLY MEN & MINORS DNI (blank blogs will be blocked you do not have my permission to republish my work onto any platform.

— A/N: moya lyubov (my love), shchenok (pup/puppy), malen'kiy (little one)

— Summary: While your mate is on a mission, your heat hits you way harder than expected and all you can do is whine and burrow yourself further in your nest. Not even Yelena can convince you to come out and look after yourself when Natty is away.

— Characters: Alpha!Nat x Alpha!Wanda (platonic), Beta!Yelena x Omega!Fem Reader (platonic), Alpha!Nat x Omega!Fem Reader (Pairing)

— Warnings: a little angsty, fluff, missing nat hours, nesting, avoidance of self care.

— Word Count: 1.6k

"No Wanda I'm not going!" Natasha growled out as Wanda briefed her on a mission coming up in two days. You were curled up in your shared room already fast asleep while Nat worked on overdue mission reports. "Tasha, we really need you on this mission. Yelena will be at the compound and you know how protective she is of her. Trust me, Y/n will be okay" Wanda spoke up quietly. She knew under all this anger was fear. She could quite literally feel the hormone battle between fight of flight going on in her teammate’s body.

"How do you know that Wanda! Her heat is supposed to hit when I’m the furthest out on the mission!" the spy snarled and Wanda bared her own teeth. "Don't get snappy at me, just because you're a mated Alpha doesn't mean my status to you changes, I'm an Alpha too, mated or not" Wanda warned and Nat grumbled before harnessing he emotions and simmering down a little.

"I can't do it, I can't leave her" she sighed and hunched down in her office chair, finally letting her guard down. "I promise on Pietro that she'll be okay, you trust your sister more than anyone and if Yelena was on this mission I'd let you sit it out" Wanda reassured her as best as she could but she understood. She had seen enough Alphas go on missions without their mate and it made her somewhat relieved to not have found hers yet.

"Can we train, I wanna get my mind off it until I have to say goodbye" Nat mumbled and Wanda nodded, dragging her best friend out of her office and towards the training rooms. The pair went on for hours, practicing both strengths and weaknesses to the point of exhaustion. It was only when Natasha took a right hook to the face did they stop and take a breath, realising just how high the tension was and how much Alpha hormones were floating around in the room.

><><><><

The glimmer of sunrise filtered through the opening in the curtains and Natasha groaned as you smushed your face closer into her neck, smelling her sweet scent and kissing her gently just under her ear. "Baby hey, none of that" she sighed back tears as she pulled you out slightly and moved you to lay on top of her instead.

“Don’ leave” you whispered sleepily and tightened your grip on her. She closed her eyes and just took in the moment. Her mission was two weeks long and knowing she was leaving you just as your heat was supposed to start was killing her. “I have to milaya, they really need me on this one” she kissed your temple and you let out a whine.

“More than I need you?” you looked up at her and pouted, pursing your lips further when she pouted back and nodded. “Unfortunately yes, I’m so sorry shchenok, I really am” she unwillingly peeled your ever so slightly heating body off hers and stretched her limbs out. Arms going overhead and shirt rising above her midsection, you couldn’t help but stare a little. God she was perfect.

"I can feel you staring moya lyubov" she snickered when she caught your eyes as they darted down. "I'm gonna miss you. It's gonna be hell Natty" you tried to plead again but she wasn't having any of it. "I know you are but I'm leaving you with my best girl and she's gonna make sure you'll take care of yourself okay?" your mate gave you a pointed look as she grabbed your chin gently, ensuring eye contact was made as she did so.

With a huff, you shrugged your face out of her hold and pouted. "Don't be away too long" were your final words as she kissed your lips gently and slipped out of bed, preparing her bags for the mission. As cold as the morning was, you followed her around the room like a shadow, needing to feel as much of her warmth and heartbeat before she was gone. "Not that one" you growled slightly and ripped the jumper out of Natasha's hands just as she was about to put it in the grey sports bag.

It was your favourite jumper of hers, it smelled just like her and was a little oversized. "But that's my good luck jumper it makes me think of you" she frowned but the rejected look on your face made her reconsider her next few words. "Can I uhm- can I take one of your jumpers instead? I still need you with me" she whispered out the last sentence and you scrambled to get one of your favourites that she got for you one time.

And so the early hours were spent packing and reassuring until Wanda knocked and called for the Widow. With final goodbyes and reassuring scent markings, a mere few minutes later and your mate was well and truly commencing her mission. It was barely 7am and there was no way you could fall back asleep, not without her lulling you into a peaceful slumber. Natasha had told Yelena to make sure you were still functioning during her time away and while you were grateful for the blonde, you needed your mate.

><><><><

It was the third day of your heat and you had been insufferable. You had come out twice to eat and Yelena had to drag you out of your nest both times. In a heaped pile of Natasha's clothes, stuffed bears and her playlist, you were under it all. Surrounded. Today was supposed to be the peak of your heat and you had locked yourself in your room. You didn't want to hear, see or smell anyone other than Nat.

A low pitiful whine left your throat as you burrowed your face deeper into the Build-a-Bear she got you and it was painful for everyone else to hear. Every single bone in your body was calling out for your mate. Your mind was in a stuck loop of wanting to be as close to her as possible to not wanting to be reminded of her absence and it was torture.

"Y/n, hey malen'kiy, can I come in?" it was Yelena. Her voice was soft and warm; and a sense of security lingered slightly in the room. She was releasing calming hormones to at least try and settle your extremely high emotions, it almost felt like you were grieving for Nat. "I want my mate" you whimpered dejectedly and Yelena's heart ached for you. "I know I'm sorry" the assassin sighed as she stood by the door contemplating on what to do next.

"Do you want to face time her? I can try and sort an arrangement out with her so she's free on her downtime to call you?" she offered a little unsure on how you were going to react but all you did was let out a guttural low cry. “Okay okay no mentions of her you’re okay I’m so sorry” she tried to comfort you as best as she could from her position by the door.

With a heavy heart and teary eyes, she closed the door and let you be. Clearly anything remotely attached to Natasha was only giving you more grief. Your every so slightly rising and falling slumped body in a mess of clothes, smells and sounds was about the only thing indicating you were still alive.

Days passed and you still had not moved. Yelena came by every few hours to give you water but she was soon running out of glasses. Tomorrow was supposed to be the day your mate came home but Yelena wouldn’t be surprised if it had completely bypassed you. Night fall was probably the worst time you longed for your mate. The most you slept in the two weeks Natasha was away would only have to be a mere 40 hours.

Yelena once again, came to see if you were still alive and well but the whimpering made her physically cower from your closed door. She could only hope Nat was here for when you woke up.

><><><><

The second Natasha stepped off the quinjet she made a beeline to your shared room. Her heart was sore and her bones were aching. All she wanted was to wrap herself around you til the sun stopped rising. Yelena had kept her updated as best as she could but there was barely any signal where she had been hiding out. The last text she got was “she’s completely broken sestra” three days ago and she was panicking.

She padded lightly down the halls turning every corner with ease until she was finally at the door. Her senses going crazy as she heard your desperate howls for her. She creaked the door open and whined softly when she caught your scent, your body going rigid for a second before completely relaxing. She was here. Your mate was home.

Eager to be close to you, yet afraid to startle you, she made quick work of slipping out of her mission clothes and into your hoodie and a pair of your sweatpants. It was like she was on auto pilot. The minute she was close enough to hear your heartbeat, she was whining and slipping under your nest. Your small frame involuntarily reaching out for her when she was buried beneath the heaped mess of your relationship. Your two heartbeats matching pace and her smell finally surrounding you in person. Two hearts were made whole again.

#natasha romanoff #natasha x reader #black widow #werewolf!nat

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meganwritesfanfics · 1 year

Text

What a Lovely Way of Saying How Much You Love Me

Jamie Tartt x Reader

Jamie and the reader finally talk about being pregnant.

Check out Part 1, Part 2 Part 4 Part 5

Thank you all so much for the love you have shown for this. Jamie has easily become one of my favorite TV characters of all time and I think Phil is a phenomenal actor. I still have some more ideas for this before I wrap up this storyline, so stay tuned.

_________________________________________________________

Y/N had been laying in bed almost the whole day watching sappy rom coms, trying to make herself feel even just a bit better, but nothing was working. All she wanted was Jamie here to hold her and make her feel better, and she feared those days were long gone. She knew Jamie loved her but this was something bigger than both of them ever had anticipated.

Suddenly her vision of the future changed, Jamie would stay with her, he would give up football, he would marry her, and he would be miserable. Thinking he had to do the honorable thing, he would sacrifice everything for her.

“Oh no,” She said as she quickly sat up. “No, no, no.”

Y/N knew she couldn’t let that happen, Jamie couldn’t change his whole life just for her, she wouldn’t let him. She knew that if Jamie wasn’t going to leave that she had to be the one to go, to let him off the hook and let him live his life.

With that thought she sprung out of bed and began to pack.

“Baby!” She heard a voice call.

“Fuck,” She said under her breath as she began to close up her suitcase.

“Y/N are you here!” Jamie called again.

In her panic she didn’t even hear the door to the bedroom open.

“What are you doin’” Jamie asked his voice sounding broken.

Y/N sucked in her breath trying to compose herself before she turned to look at Jamie. But when she saw him standing in the doorway a gigantic bouquet of rose lilies, her favorite flowers she shattered.

“Oh Jamie,” She broke down crying as she sat on the edge of the bed.

“Hey, hey.” Jamie said quickly rushing to her side. He set down the flowers on the bedside table before he knelt down in front of her taking her face in his hands

“Those are beautiful,” She groaned in between her sobs.

“I know they are your favorite, and I needed to do some major groveling.”

“You don’t have to do anything Jamie, I…” She tried to compose herself but whether it be the situation or the hormones that were causing havoc she couldn’t get her emotions under control.

“Were you plannin’ on going somewhere?” He asked his worried eyes darting to the suitcase.

“I can’t do this to you Jamie.” She hiccuped.

“Do what baby?”

“Ruin your life.” Y/N responded as she reached up and took his hands in hers. “You don’t want this baby, I get it. But I don’t think I want to get rid of it. There is a part of me that has always wanted to be a mom but I… I don’t want to lose you. But I can’t be selfish with you, you have worked too hard and too long to just give everything up.”

“Who said I would have to give it up? Look at Zava, he has kids and he is still one of the best players out there.”

“Yeah but Jamie, he let his kids name themselves, I don’t really think being a parent is high on his priority list.”

“Ya, you’re right.”

“So I’m going to go, I’m going to let you off the hook. If you want down the line to be in this baby’s life wonderful, but I’m not expecting anything from you.” Y/N said and she started to let go of his hands. However Jamie just held on tighter.

“Wait a minute, Y/N I want to be in your life, and I want…” He took a deep breath. “I want this baby. I know that how I handled the news was bad. And I am so sorry, I was just… I was terrified. I was so scared that I would be a fuck up just like my dad.”

“Honey, you are nothing like him.” Y/N said as she reached up and ran her fingers through his hair.

“I just didn’t think I could risk it. And I didn’t want to make your life miserable either, hell I know I’m not always the most easy to get along with, and I didn’t want a kid to make it worse.” He continued. “But I had a good talk with Ted and I want this. I want this life with you.”

“But what about your career Jamie?”

“I don’t think anything has to change. Ya things are going to be different around here and ya things are going to get a bit challenging, but what today showed me is that we have so many people in our lives that care about us. They are going to be there for us every step of the way.”

“Roy is weirdly good with kids.” Y/N smirked.

“Exactly, so I think we are going to be just fine.” He smiled widely as he pulled her in for a long kiss. “Now if you would let me I would like to redo my initial reaction to you telling me you’re pregnant.”

Y/N laughed as Jamie wiped her tears away.

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, now.” Suddenly he stood up and ran towards the bedroom door. “Pretend you just found out and I have just come home. Ok action.” He said as he walked out into the hallway and shut the door.

Y/N couldn’t help but giggle.

“Honey I’m home!” Jamie called as he flung open the door.

“Jamie, darling light of my life, I have the most wonderful news.”

“And what is that Y/N my peach.” He replied putting on his best posh accent.

“We are going to have a baby.”

Suddenly Jamie’s dynamic changed as he wrapped his arms around her. “I love you, and I love this baby.” He whispered. They stayed like that for a moment with Jamie’s face buried in Y/N’s hair as he held onto her tightly, before he picked her up in his arms and spun her around.

“Is it too early to start thinking of baby names?” He asked.

“If it’s a boy I’m think about naming him Roy.” Y/N teased.

“Absolutely not, we are not naming my son after that grandpa.” Jamie laughed as he laid down on the bed positioning Y/N on top of him, his arms still wrapped tightly around her. “Speaking of Roy, you may need to call him and tell him everything is ok, I think he is planning my murder.”

Y/N laughed as she looked up at Jamie, resting her chin on his chest. “I love you Jamie, so much.” She beamed. “You are going to make such a great dad.”

Jamie’s eyes filled up with tears as he leaned down and kissed her again. When they broke apart Y/N snuggled back into Jamie’s embrace. Jamie placed a kiss on the top of her forehead. “Ya if Roy doesn’t murder me first.” He whispered and Y/N let out a loud laugh.

#jamie tartt x reader #ted lasso #series #fanfic

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ghouljams · 2 months

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Ghoul maybe it’s bc I’m acespec but I’ve always related the most to betas and have always felt that they should be the rarest and not alphas or omegas (I also hate the idea of rare meaning that people may only know like one, 1% of a million is still 10,000)

You're totally valid in this my love, I am saying that right out of the gate. I love when acespec folks weigh in on kink and fic tropes like this because y'all provide such an interesting perspective that I (as an allo person) don't have.

I think this is one of my issues with traditional a/b/o as well. The way that betas are treated and categorized feels very much not only as a cultural other, but also as sexless. Which is great for acespec folks, but also makes me wonder about ace omegas or ace alphas.

I am firmly against any endotype being considered "rare" simply because again I view it as a sliding scale.

Lets say this is the Alpha-Omega scale with Alphas as yellow and Omega as blue. A "true" beta would be that nice green in the middle, but really anyone could be anywhere on this scale. Betas would range from high spectrum(leaning alpha) to low spectrum (leaning omega) and similarly omegas and alphas could be "low spectrum" meaning they lean more towards beta. It's just the amount of each hormone you have in your body.

I don't think sexuality is tied to any one endotype the same way I don't think sexual proclivities are. Omegas aren't all bottoms, alphas aren't all tops. Everyone has a heat/rut cycle it's just how strong it is, and just like in normal humans it's a miserable hormone addled experience for some, and a breeze for others. There's no reason an omega or alpha couldn't be ace, heat/rut doesn't turn you into a sex crazed animal, it's just the point of time when you're most fertile. It's ovulation, or a period, or idk what it would be for amab folks. The time of your cycle when you're moody and just want to lay down for a week.

Back to my issue with betas in traditional omegaverse fic. They've always felt like just... the other ones, the normal humans. It always felt to me like an exclusionary designation, and that just doesn't sit right for me. It's saying "well you're not a top or a bottom so I guess you don't matter." AND AGAIN it reduces a whole subset of people to a stereotype. I fucking hate that, let people be people, let the human experience be varied and beautiful!

I don't see why any endotype can't be any thing. Alpha/Beta/Omega, whatever you are you're still a person with your own thoughts, feelings, sexuality, and gender. No endotype can be defined by any one thing, there may be expectations, but there are expectations on us now and we still define ourselves by more than that.

Ace Omegas who spend their heats with their friend because they need someone to remind them to eat and take their pills while they're laying face down on the floor with cramps. Who sit on the couch during their friend's rut and hold their hair back as they lay over the arm of the couch and try not to vomit because the hormones make their head spin.

Ace Alphas that get anxious about their roommate's heat because there aren't not enough blankets in the apartment and- no- you stay right there, I'm going to get you some soup. Ace Alphas that spend their rut crying at videos of kittens learning to walk and stealing their qpf's pillows because they're fluffier than the ones in their room.

Ace Betas that get side eyed when they sniffle during a movie because betas are supposed to be the unflappable ones, the ones that don't get emotional over nothing. Ace Betas that build nests. Ace Betas that spray their friend with scent neutralizer after a heat because they fucking STINK, shoving their friend in the bathroom to shower while they figure out cleaning up the house.

Idk. do you get what I'm saying?

#ghoul speaks #a/b/o #omegaverse #I feel like I'm a fuck...#like a political gender theorist in the omegaverse #like I'm on tv answering questions about fucking gender theory #also jesus christ I'm an omega by my own definitions #no one else would be talking this much about shit that isn't their concern #only an omega

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eatmangoesnekkid · 28 days

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The Kill: To Come Fully Alive in Your Female Body is to Know How to Give Death Like a Country Woman Who Knows How to Process Her Home-Grown, Organically-Raised Chickens When It's Time

How I Reprogram My Cells With New Narratives Using My Imagination and After Care (My Gift to Readers On Tumblr)

I'm almost 48 years old and every month my body releases a healthy beautiful egg because it is still trying to have a big chunky baby.

I'm not peri-menopausal yet but will be using this year to reprogram my tissues with new narratives around menopause beyond the dehydrating stories I can feel trapped in my female line. The keycode here is that it takes time so you must begin now....early.

I'm deeply a strategic and proactive woman in all my fairy playfulness and do not dissociate from any cycle of my body or womanhood in any way. Instead I spend time reprogramming my cells and lovingly planting new narratives into my body, in this case, around the experience of menopause. No doctor will prescribe pills or other substances for my natural female cycles that I have already falling in love with. The keycode here is that your love for the process is essential.

I find comfort in the present moment and I also find comfort in imagining and projecting into the future. I do not fear menopause. I do not hold common expectations that it will be difficult or dry out my pussy or my libido will fall as the culture teaches. I am clear that I won't need hormonal medication. I consciously use my energy to envision myself in the details of what I desire in life as a radiant, flexible, wet, high libido, sassy, symptom-free menopausal woman. But I don't just envision, I feel the emotions of being radiant, flexible, wet, etc. OUR EMOTIONS CONNECT US INTO THE UNIVERSE.

I am often lightyears ahead of what we call "time." Ancient-future. I am planting cosmic seeds now BEFORE my menopause years and continue to take action in the desired direction through staying active and continuing to work on my flexibility and inner beauty—forgiving, clearing, letting go, and dreaming. “Yoh, the fuck you mean ‘wait and see, ’” I thought to myself after a woman waiting in line with me at the airport said that menopause will be the worst time of my life. I responded back in the gentlest manner, " Ma'am, my menopause will not be difficult and I will not feel hot nor lose my high libido.” Haha I said that to her and continued, “I'm not an average woman and anm already programming my future menopausal years in which I rest well at night and wake up aroused for the day. I appreciate your well-intentioned words but they do not apply to me nor do I consent to that experience. I’m such a weird one—not regular. Never been.” The keycode here is that you must be willing to cut people off at the neck who subtly lead life from a victimized position about their own bodies and attempt to place that same energy onto you, even with well-meaning intentions. She was a lovely woman otherwise —and I knew she meant well but I also knew that she giving me feedback on what lives deep in my body, in the hidden and unconscious. I can’t see it but I felt it in our interaction. Therefore I wasn’t really metaphorically cutting HER neck off. I was starting the journey of severing the part of my female lineage that feels the same way as she does. I will repeat this process over and over again in my imagination, then begin the journey of self-soothing my tissues and nervous system with lots of intentional massage, juicing, and rest. What we give death to is still a valuable part that our psyches will miss interacting with, a part that up to now has made us feel safe and held. Lots of self-soothing and letting our tissues know that we will be okay without this aspect of self are essential after care.

I always ask the earth for support and speak my desires into the orange trees as I'm picking fruit, walking through a park, or hiking. The keycode here is that you need initiate support from another divine authority, whether nature, God, your ancestors, etc.

I permit myself to see my future menopausal self being juicy and abundant.

I have always lived my life this way--often 2-3 steps ahead of the game, laughing and playing a lot along the way.

Too many women and other female bodied people are stuck and trapped by the trauma they have programmed to believe about themselves (their cells). It's important that you remember who you are--a magical woman and experience this reality lightheartedly, playfully, and magically accordingly. The keycode here is that your playfulness and lightheartedness help to release any resistances. They become your fuel and battery propelling you forward into your next level or landing you directly into a quantum leap.

Maybe you aren’t concerned about menopause yet but you can apply these key codes to any other aspects of your life. --India Ame'ye, Author

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harlowcomehome · 1 year

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“Our last Valentine’s Day before baby Hazel.”

You were due with Hazel just next month which meant you were heavily pregnant and uncomfortable. Jack was squeezing as much studio time in as he could, and trying to finish up all of his projects before the baby came.

The two of you had had a brief conversation about Valentine’s Day, you didn’t wanna make a big deal out of it because you knew the both of you were simultaneously losing your mind getting ready for this big change in your lives.

You both agreed that you weren’t going to make a big deal out of it this year, but because of your hormones, you felt regretful of that conversation.

You had come to the realization that this would be your last Valentine’s Day just you two.

So, you called your mother in law and the two of you went out shopping, neither one of you ever really needing an excuse to.

“I don’t know what to get him, you know how he is about gifts” you giggled as you waddled down the aisles with her.

“And I know how you are about gifts too” she teased and you laughed, “I can’t help it! It’s how I show love.”

“What about one of those massage chairs? His scoliosis has been killing him and it’s only going to get worse when he has to carry a baby around the house” you sighed.

“That baby is going to be seven pounds tops” she laughed and you did too.

“You know how dramatic your son is” you laughed before continuing “It’s crazy that next month she’ll already be here” you sighed as you waited for someone to assist you in ordering the massage chair.

The next day was Valentine’s Day and you woke up alone, Jacks chair was going to get delivered soon and you had hoped that by some miracle he had decided to spend Valentine’s Day with you anyway.

You started to clean up the kitchen, you always cleaned when you were upset. After that it didn’t take long before the delivery showed up at your door. You showed them where to put the chair, and thanked them, tipping heavily.

You started to cry, because a guilt was growing inside of you because you had high hopes for today. You placed a bow on the chair, and started to get ready for a shower.

When you had got out of the shower you had a missed call from Jack, you rolled your eyes and continued to get ready for the day. You knew he worried because your were heavily pregnant but you were too upset for rational thinking at the moment.

Meanwhile Jack was at the studio with Clay and Nemo.

“Shouldn’t you be with your wife today?” Nemo asked concerned.

“Yeah, I have a whole plan for today but she’s not answering any of my calls” Jack said worriedly.

“She’s probably pissed at you” Clay laughed “I mean she’s super pregnant and I’m sure she’s emotional.”

“She probably thinks you forgot what today is” Nemo replied.

“Well we both agreed not to do anything today but I know her better than that” Jack laughed.

“So you do have a plan right?” Clay asked nervously.

“The entire back seat of my car is full of flowers and gifts” Jack laughed and both Nemo and Clay sighed in relief.

“I’m definitely going to head home because she’s either giving birth on our kitchen floor or ignoring me” he joked but also it was clear he was nervous.

You had just finished getting ready for the day when you heard the front door open, you usually met him in the living room or at the door but you didn’t today which stressed him out even more.

“Y/N?”

You continued to ignore him.

“Y/N? Are you okay?” He started to stress and you heard footsteps coming toward the bedroom.

“You scared me. I was worried you were having the baby or something” he joked and you gave him a half smile.

“What’s the matter baby?” He walked over to you and you shrugged.

“Just hormonal today” you lied and he knew it.

“Wait here, I have a surprise for you but I need like 30-40 minutes?” He smiled and you tried to hide your excitement but you agreed to stay in the bedroom.

When Jack went back outside to his car he noticed Clay was parked outside, “you’ll get this done a lot quicker with help” Clay laughed and the two of them ran in and out of the house setting up flowers, balloons, gift bags and other small decorations.

“Next year I’m hiring someone for this” Jack laughed before taking an exhausted breath and thanking his little brother.

When he came back to the bedroom you were laying down scrolling on your phone.

“Come with me?” He helped you off the bed and put slippers on your swollen feet.

You walked out into your living room/dining room area and saw the flowers, balloons, gifts and more.

“Jack, I thought you weren’t doing anything today” your eyes began to water and he turned to you.

“I know you better than that” he laughed, wiping your tears that began to fall.

“I ordered some food that’ll be delivered here soon but I got us a cake, chocolate covered strawberries and sparkling grape juice” he laughed and you tried to hold it together. Truly touched by your husbands actions.

“I was so mad at you because I thought you weren’t going to do anything but then I was mad at myself because I’m the one who told you not to” you rubbed your belly as you continued to cry.

“You’re pregnant, I knew you didn’t mean it” he laughed before continuing “This is our last Valentine’s Day just the two of us, I knew better than to skip it, come on” he laughed and you did too before giving him a kiss. His hands immediately rubbing on your big belly.

“Did you see your gift?” You smiled and he shook his head.

“I was so busy running in and out I guess I didn’t notice it” he confessed and you guided him over to his new massage chair.

“I got you a massage chair for your back” you said proudly and he sat down in it immediately. He started moaning and it made you laugh, “don’t do that too much, a massage is what got us here” you winked and he turned the chair off before following you.

When the food arrived the two of you reminisced about your past valentines together. Discussing your first one together was almost a Valentine’s Day tradition.

“Did you really think I wasn’t doing anything today?” Jack said in between bites and you giggled, hiding your face.

“It’s the hormones” you responded shyly and he laughed.

“I’ll let you get away with it this time” he winked before pointing to the gift bags aligned against the wall.

“Do you wanna open your presents now?” Jack smiled and you nodded. He stood up, handing you a small bag first.

“Geez, I wonder what this is” you giggle sarcastically opening your bottle of perfume. Jack had gotten you a new bottle every Valentine’s Day since the first.

“Your cologne is on your nightstand” you giggled, following the same tradition.

#Jack Harlow #Jack Harlow x reader #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow blurb #jack harlow fanfic #jack harlow fluff

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anime-kia · 1 year

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No Strings Attached

I'm happy to know that you're all still into Killmonger! :)

And I haven't written smut in a while, so here you go.

Relationship: Friends-With-Benefits

Warnings: Smut

It was nothing out of the ordinary to find yourself being filled up and absolutely overstimulated by the brawny, muscular and handsome, Erik Stevens. The Oakland ho', is what you nicknamed him.

He knew. You made sure to tell him, but he found it quite amusing. Nothing really offended him, coming from you anyway.

Erik had met you in high school. Of course he was Mr. Popular. You've heard of his escapades and all the wild things he's done with various girls, some of them being your friends. Oddly enough, sex was not interesting to you at the time.

You were known as the typical smart and shy girl. The virgin. Erik's favourite kind of female. You better believe he's been trying to get at you ever since, literally going out of his way to become friends with you just so he could get into your pants.

But eventually he realized that you were more than just a quick nut. You were goofy, insightful and a pleasure to be around. Your lack of sexual curiosity and attention to more important things intrigued him. Also, he could always go to you if he was upset, you let him vent and express all of his emotions. Not once did you judge or ridicule him like his foster parents or anyone else who didn't give him the time of day to show his feelings.

"Venting is good for the soul, never bottle up your anger. Always talk to me if you need to. Cry on my shoulder too."

"Hell nah, I don't cry. I ain't no bitch."

You were irritated that the only thing he took from what you said was suggesting that he cried... But Erik understood, he just liked to be tough.

That being said, ever since the tenth grade you and Erik were best friends. Both of you slowly started picking up each other's good and bad habits. Erik started to develop proper mannerisms, politeness, and a bit of patience. You on the other hand, started cursing a lot more and somehow it was like his high levels of horniness had attached itself onto you.

Each year it increased more and more. Everyone knew you as the girl who had no interest in sex, and despite your changes, you made sure that everyone still believed that. Also, people who wanted to have a go at you (Erik's friends) knew they had no chance with him around. He made sure they knew that too.

"If any of y'all touch her, you better pray I don't find out. And good luck with that shit, cuz she tells me everything."

One night, he came over to chill and watch movies because that's what friends do. You were still a virgin, and your hormones were out of whack. Erik, well... When was he never horny? The movie ended and went to go take a shower, and the whole time you were contemplating if you would actually let him hit it.

He was never reserved when it came to anything sexual. He told you he wanted to on multiple occasions, no strings attached.

Tonight... Would finally be the night.

As he stepped out of the bathroom your jaw dropped slightly and lower half screamed. The towel was barely hugging his hips, muscular body covered in beads of water, the shape of his manhood barely making an appearance.

All that shy shit was thrown out the window. Within three seconds your lips had found his, arms wrapped around each other in a heated and passionate kiss. By a minute, all of your clothes were discarded and Erik had his way with your body.

There was pain and there was pleasure, but you both knew that sex with each other would become a regular thing.

Once again, no strings attached.

Erik had you laid out on your back, legs spread wide as his large hand squeezed your right breast and you moaned out. Every single stroke hit you in the right spot.

"You like that shit, huh princess? Lil freak." His voice was husky and gruff.

"Mmh, yes! Oh fuck!" You whined as he moved closer and went even deeper.

His size made you wonder if it could be considered a weapon, because it was deadly. It was like God gave him both the size and the talent, a terrible (but utterly amazing) combo. You were sure if he was small he could still get you screaming at the top of your lungs. He just knew exactly what to do, and he did it before you could even ask him to go "deeper" or "harder".

He's made you cry, scream and blackout all at the same time on multiple occasions. The location didn't even matter. Despite him being a very big guy, he could fuck you all the same in a Mini Cooper.

And Erik was a freak freak. He hasn't shown you everything, because you were still adjusting to some of it, like public sex. That was always terrifying to you, but for some reason no one caught you yet. As far as you know...

"I'm killing your shit, right?" It wasn't a question, even if he asked it as such. He knew.

"Yessss!" You moaned in a high pitch. He was killing it, destroying it, obliterating it all in the best way possible.

Your nails clawed at the bed, his strokes were so precise and on beat. You had a love-hate relationship with being in the missionary position with him. It was like the perfect mix between making love and just straight up fucking. Backstrokes were a lot easier to handle, even though it still could have you tapping out. But missionary, Erik assumed full control in this position. He had your mind was muddled and the only thing you could compute were barely coherent words, lots of moaning/screaming/crying and the intense amount of pleasure this man was delivering in between your legs.

You felt his hands attempt to trail up behind your knees to push them into your chest and you knew if he did, it would be over. You pushed back and tried shuffling away, but he caught you dragging you right back fully onto him before you could get more than halfway off. The sound of you connecting back was sinful.

"Nah shorty, ain't no crawling away." He said, hoisting your legs over his shoulders, "I'm tryna go deep."

As if he wasn't already hitting your g-spot, this nigga was trying to damage your cervix.

"No, wait E-!" The way his hips pressed against yours, followed by his chest had your eyes squeezing shut. "God, ohh my fucking- Ohhh!" He was so heavy.

"So you'll call me God, but you won't call me daddy, huh? That's crazy."

"Uhh, shut the fuck up, Erik!" You could do without his annoying ass comments at the moment. Right now, you had to make sure your walls would still be intact when he was finished with you.

He chuckled, changing the rhythm to a medium speed. He sucked on your neck, surely leaving new marks. "I own this shit. All mine." He smirked.

"Y-you're too d-deep, ohhh!" Your moans were starting to come out as whimpers and that's how Erik knew you were just about spent.

"No such thing, baby girl." He groaned and leaned off of you, only to drag your hips slightly into the air, "Look how yo' pussy wrapped around my dick, like a birthday gift." He watched as his length disappeared and reappeared into you.

This motherfucker... "It's too much, p-please, Erik!"

"Tell me it's mine then." He hit you with deep and sharp thrusts after each word.

"Ahh! It-it's yours! Oh fuck!" You tried to say to the best of your ability, just so he could hurry up and finish.

"Say it like you mean it, I can feel you shaking. That nut is real close, but best believe you ain't getting it until you say it right." He was so bloody annoying, as if you hadn't came four times already. But then again, he hasn't pulled out since laying you on your back. He probably thought you were just squirting the whole time.

His thumb pressed hard against your clit, and his cold eyes stared dead into yours. His hips were circling into yours once again.

"Fuuckk, Erik it's yours dammit! This pussy is all yours!" Your moaned out exasperatedly, nails leaving imprints on his bedsheets.

He chuckled at your irritated tone, settling for your answer. That was his favourite line to hear during sex. "Imma nut all in yo' shit, girl." You had already came, squeezing around his dick even tighter. He was very close to releasing so he thrusted into you harder and faster, not missing a beat until he finally emptied himself deep into you.

You both were breathing with heavy laboured breaths by time he pulled out. You were aching, but also experiencing pure euphoria.

He got up and left to go to the bathroom, giving you time to recuperate.

Though Erik wouldn't admit it, you had the best pussy he's ever had. He hadn't been messing around too much after finally getting a piece of you. He's never made love before, and the closest he's gotten was fucking you slowly. You two were strictly friends and he would keep it as such. He didn't want you knowing that he was getting attached. It made him feel weak.

You on the other hand, seemed unfazed by it. He could do things with your body that no one could, but yet still you respected the boundary between romance and friendship. Besides, sex was so casual these days. Pussy and dick was everywhere...

When he got back in the bed, he pulled his phone off the nightstand and began scrolling through his Twitter timeline as if nothing just happened. Something compelled you to get closer to him, so you wrapped your arms around his waist and laid your head on his rough chest. The muscles in him tensed up.

"Yo, whatchu doin', girl?"

"It's just... We always fuck and that's it. Can you at least hold me till I fall asleep, E?" You looked at him with innocent eyes, he loved that.

"Nah, I don't cuddle. No strings attached, remember?" He gently pushed you off of him.

You sat up and pouted, folding your arms across your bare chest. "It doesn't even have to be on no relationship shit, Erik..."

"No, (y/n), we do this every time." He gave you a stern look, you hated that.

You rolled your eyes and turned over, shutting off the lamp. "Goodnight, I guess..."

"Night." He said, paying you no mind.

Ten minutes later, he shut off his phone and glanced at your delicate sleeping frame. He silently laughs, seeing how far away you moved. You were upset, he could tell.

"Never go to sleep upset." You would always be the one telling him that, it was a shame that you hadn't practiced what you preached.

He would be lying if he said that it did feel good when you wrapped around him, even if it was for a few seconds. Erik had never cuddled after sex, he thought that would cause people to catch feelings. He also didn't want the girl he just slept with to ask him dumb questions afterwards like, "Why me?" or "What would you do if I died?" Just shit that he wouldn't have the answer that they're looking for.

He pulled your body closer to the centre of the bed, as you were too close to the edge and shut off his lamp.

You were awoken to the irritating feeling of needing to pee. You tried to spring up quickly, only to be held down by a tight and heavy grasp. Soft snores from the man you slept with less than three hours ago filled your ears.

Wait... Was he... Cuddling you?!

Mr. "I don't cuddle" really had his big ass arms wrapped around your body. Not to mention, but he was knocked out like a baby.

This all would be so nice if your bladder wasn't threatening to explode right now.

"Erik." You whispered, and tried to get out of his grasp. He didn't respond or seem aware of your presence.

He was really knocked. Usually the slightest noise and movements would wake him up.

There was one time you were opening a bag his favourite bag of chips while he was napping on your sofa. You didn't even open a quarter of the bag and he was already up, snatching the whole bag out of your hands.

You elbowed him a little roughly, and called out his name even louder. "Erik!"

He groaned in pain, "Argh, damn girl. The hell was that for?"

"I need to go pee."

"Then go, you grown."

"Nigga, I can't with your arms holding me down."

"Ah shit." He whispered to himself, letting you go.

"I thought you didn't cuddle." You teased him.

"I don't." He denied.

"Erik, you really about to act like you weren't just holding me against your chest."

"You probably scooted in to me." He tried to argue back.

"E, that doesn't even- You know what?" You got up from the bed, and looked at the digital clock. "Not at four in the morning, aight?" You went to use the bathroom and left Erik to contemplate.

He wasn't cuddling you initially, but at some point he must've connected with you. You were the most comforting person to be around in all aspects. Even when you argued with each other. He was so content and peaceful whenever he was around you.

You came back and went right to the edge of the bed, surprised when Erik pulled you back in. His arms wrapped protectively around your body.

"Erik, wha-"

"Shut up, (Y/n). I'm trying to sleep." He said in a raspy voice.

You rolled your eyes for the last time and closed them, deciding you were too tired to scold him for telling you to shut up.

If he wasn't a cuddler before, he definitely is one now.

Hope you all enjoyed! I didn't add too much of a romantic relationship because I really wanna explore different types relationships with Erik and the reader. Plus I had another plot idea to link with this one, but I'll save it for another.

I'm also very tempted to edit this now, but it's almost five a.m. and I'm sleepy so I know there will be so many mistakes if I do lol.

Thanks for reading!

(Start/Finish: June 25, 2019)

#killmonger fic #killmonger x reader #black reader

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channieandhisgoonsquad · 9 months

Note

Ohoho baby, you shouldn't have opened this.

You're about to get sick of me

I haven't read the minsung post yet because I'm about to go to work in a few and I really want to read it calmly and enjoy it.

In the meantime:

Minsung smut and maybe some angst (I mean jealousy or what comes to your mind) based on my post about Teacher!Minho and Boss! Jisung. I want these two to use their authority over me to do as they please..or I simply want to seduce them until they snap. Your choice

Can't wait to see what you do🙈

Okayyyy here I go 😭😈♥️

Life Got Complicated

Being a freshly young adult over winter break was supposed to be fun. But, when you came back to senior year to find your AP teacher retired suddenly and that your old babysitter crush was your new teacher, that presented its own problems.

Word from me: @lyramundana I have written so much and I want to continue but I also want to give you something for now. I changed the place she works at to a bakery… for reasons. Lol 😘

You didn’t know his teaching style and how you were supposed to even pay attention when he grew into such an immaculate man.

On your first day, you went to your normal seat as you just stared at the man. He really had become so beautiful. And it was making all your lady bits squirm. He dressed as if he was walking into the million dollar company he ran and it wasn’t fair. You were literally in your casual jeans and an old sweater.

He set all his things down and proceeded to take attendance. He came to your name and said it like it was a question. You raised your hand and he smirked, realizing you were who he thought you were and you sunk further into your chair in embarrassment.

Class was not going to be fun. You were mortified.

It was a hard class, but Minho was trying to act casual around you, when he really wanted to mess with you. At the end of the first class, Mr. Lee requested you stay after. You rolled your eyes, immediately knowing what was happening.

“Y/n, it’s been a while. How are you?”

“I’m great. Balancing work, school, and a couple college credits is a breeze.” You rolled your eyes again, not knowing why he was going for the casual banter when he was your teacher now.

“Well, if you ever need any help with anything let me know. I know an AP class on top of that can be tough.” He said genuinely while watching your face warp into one of horror.

“I think I’ll be fine. But thank you, Minho.”

“It’s Mr. Lee for you now, miss. Don’t forget that.” Thank god this was your last class because your hormones were kicking all your emotions into high gear and you really wanted to flirt. But instead, opted for annoyed.

“Fine.” You Left quickly l, not looking back at him because thinking about calling him anything other than Minho was weird. And especially him having this superior complex about him.

Time for work.

You had started training by watching a shit ton of videos going over safety in a bakery and cleanliness. But today was your first day getting to do actual work.

You entered the bakery with your work uniform in tow, heading straight to the bathroom in back to change before even approaching your boss. You'd only met the one so far, but you knew today would be with the other man that owned the place.

After getting redressed, you headed to the office to find the co-owner that was training you. When you knocked, you heard "Come in" and walked in to find a handsome man facing his computer. You just saw his back, but bitch, you knew that if his back looked this good in their polo his face must be beautiful.

You weren't wrong, but also, you were shocked. "Han Jisung?!" You exclaimed. This was the same kid that used to help out his dad when you were younger. He was making money as a teacher's aid to his own dad, which always seemed sketchy, but he worked so hard to help in every way he could in his father's chemistry class.

He squinted suspiciously at you, trying to figure out where he knew you from, "Wait, y/n?". You don't know if you should be excited or scared that he recognizes you. That was back in the braces day. Ugh.

The training with him went as well as it could. It was nice to have some background on each other and previous encounters; it made the conversations flow.

--- A couple weeks later ---

Balancing school and work was getting harder. The classes were getting more intense and you were finally on your own at work. The few hours you spent at the bakery were making it hard for you to keep up with homework. But the pay was sooo nice.

You sighed heavily without realizing during Minho's lecture and he noticed, but didn't mention it in front of class to save you the embarrassment.

"Miss y/n, please stay after."

The eye roll returned without a second thought. It couldn't be helped since your teacher likes to treat you like a literal child. Constantly being extra careful around you and making fun of you with a small smirk that embarrasses you.

"What's up, Minho?"

He removed any resemblance of a smile from his face, "Mr. Lee."

"Okay, well...?"

"You were sighing and yawning a lot. I just wanted to make sure everything was going okay at home?"

"Oh." You were surprised by the attention he had paid, blushing slightly. "I've just been learning and working a lot. I should probably ask for less hours."

"Make sure you manage your time correctly. If you need tutoring, my offer still stands. You're smart, but you aren't paying attention."

"Aye aye."

--- After School ---

"Are you comfortable closing with me tonight?" Han questioned while you were getting washed up to start making tomorrow's bread.

"Yeah, I assumed that why I was scheduled so late, but it's fine." You and Han had gotten a lot closer in your hours working together. He was the normal closer for their bakery, so it was most evenings with him.

The night went pretty regularly. Except for Jisung allowed you to pick the Spotify playlist for the evening. It made the shift so much more fun as you sang along and helped customers' with their orders.

The vibe was a great change from the stress of school. Gave you a chance to enjoy being around a gorgeous man and make money.

You weren’t sure if you were imagining it, but you felt like Jisung had really loosened up to you. It made learning easy, but also the crush you were developing grow faster.

He was prepping some of the loaves for the next day already, since it was almost closing time. Separating and getting them ready to rise one last time. You were watching him working deftly with his hands to create the perfect shapes and he noticed your curious stares.

“Would you like to learn some of the shaping?” You were so focused on his work that you jumped when he spoke up.

“Sorry- uhm yeah. I’d like that.”

You moved to his side and stood shoulder to shoulder with him as you watched him slice off another piece of dough, weigh it, and then cover it with flour to shape it.

He cut off a piece and handed it to you as a trial piece. You tried your best to replicate, but it was obvious you needed more help.

Han was a good boss, so he did what anyone would do in his circumstance, right? No.

Han came up from behind you and stood directly against you. You were so shocked that you forget how to breath for a second. He grabbed your flour covered hands so that he could maneuver them and demonstrate the motions from your view.

The man’s crotch was directly against your lower back and you could not swipe that thought from your mind as he rested his head on your shoulder. Focusing on his lesson was nearly impossible. You were aware he was still attempting a lesson on shaping, but all you saw was his veiny arms and fingers contracting and manipulating the soft pliable material.

But all your brain could think of was how well he could use those fingers to manipulate something else. “Are you even listening, y/n?”

You replied with a dumb “Uhm yeah of course.”

“Try this then.” He let you give it a go and his hands held himself up against the table top as he watched. He still made no movement to get away from you and you felt your heart race at the proximity and his breath in your ear. “That’s better…”

The bell at the front counter rang and you were both taken out of the lesson to look at the guest there. Unfortunately, the bakery has no separation from the front table to the main bakery, but neither of you had expected to have any other visitors.

Jisung moved so far away so quickly, as if he was caught doing something he should be, while you were just so surprised you froze in place.

He went up to talk to the person while you refused to make eye contact from embarrassment of being so in your perverted thoughts. But how couldn’t you be? He was literally standing against your back. Perfect position for ramming into from behind-

“Y/n?” You were taken it if your dirty thoughts by your name being called by the familiar voice.

You looked up and realized that the customer stood at the counter was none other than your new teacher, and old babysitter, Lee Minho. “Minho?! What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to try this bakery for my breakfast tomorrow. I mean, I didn’t know this is where you worked.” He was stuttering and you weren’t sure why. If you could guess, he was just as caught of guard as you. All professionalism left his body as soon as he had gotten out of the suit and tie at school.

His slacks and half open button down accentuated his gorgeous figure in a way you did not need, but would definitely remember for later. “Oh. Yeah this is my after school job. This is Jisung.”

He glared at the man. Seemingly jealous of the man that you had just been standing near. But why? “That didn’t seem like very professional training, Jisung.”

“Sir, it’s Han for you, and I don’t think you can judge my teaching methods. I’ve heard you’re her teacher from previous chats. And you’re allowing her to call your name so casually? That’s also not very appropriate.”

“We know each other from previous. And I am not her teacher right now.”

Han rolled his eyes at his response. “Well we also know each other from before. Maybe you should mind your business?”

Minho looked over to you, and you returned his inquisitive look. “Is y/n your girlfriend?” You we’re shocked at all the words coming from the men.

“Why does it matter to you?” Han asked him before he could say anything else. You really wanted to say something but you were dumbfounded at the current situation you found yourself in.

Minho was still staring at you. His look seemingly amused as you made an attempt to utter anything. The man walked back to the exit and flipped the open sign over to ‘closed’ and locked the door. The scene was getting more tense and the two of you behind the counter shared a pensive look. Han pointed lowly at the panic button under the counter just in case you guys needed it.

As Minho walked back to the counter he walked around to the back and towards you. He never looked at Han the entire time and you were frozen by his intense glare. He stopped a foot away from you and finally looked behind your head at the other man, “I asked, because I’ve been thinking about giving her lessons of my own. But I won’t if she is your student already.” He cocked his head like it was a question.

Han stood his ground behind you at the strange man. “What are you helping her with?”

Lee Minho, the man, the legend, smiled at Han as he easily spoke, “everything. I want to teach her everything.”

At that moment Lee Minho closed the gap. He put one hand behind your head and asked, “May I?”

You nodded your head and he closed the gap as he let his lips caress your own.

My boos: @2chopsticks2eyes @sweetracha @moonlightndaydreams

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catboybiologist · 6 months

Text

Transition journal #2: October 2023

Two months, lets gooooo!!!!!! To start off, I've updated my metrics spreadsheet:

My first levels check is on there, alongside the usual stuff.

I have a couple of thoughts and notes, just like I did last month, but this is probably going to be a bit shorter and less excited than last month. Nothing disappointing about this month, just less so than the wave of emotions that came with starting.

The biggest change in the past month has def been that I started my spiro based on my levels. I was actually genuinely surprised that my levels were that low on E and high on T. T is solidly above target levels, and my endo described my E as “barely acceptable” and said we should get it higher. I’m all for it, of course. But that also means starting spiro.

Right before starting spiro, I was noting that that initial burst of changes was slowing down. Notably, it seemed like breast growth was slowing, but tbf, it really seemed like I had a frenzy of it to kick off the changes. Spiro does feel like it restarted that, but I can’t tell how much that’s a direct effect of it and how much it's just that these changes are going in bursts anyways.

That being said, it's been an interesting month of changes. Notably, my overbust hasn’t increased at all- but, I’ve lost a lot of weight overall. My waist and underbust both decreased, while my overbust and hips remained exactly the same. So proportionately, they’ve grown. I’m actually shocked that my underbust decreased, even if it was just half an inch. Best I can figure is that I have fat pockets that extend down from my armpits, and I think I burned fat from those. While bone changes are possible even in adults on HRT, they wouldn’t happen this fast to my ribcage. I don’t think I’m go

Of course, I’m wildly happy about the way my waist has been developing. Not only is it quantitatively thinning, the way the fat looks even in side profile is gradually looking more like “female” pudge as opposed to “man” pudge. Does that make sense? There’s certainly a difference between the way hormonally male and female people carry their belly fat, and I think I’m starting to see just a little of that femaleness shine through. I’m ecstatic. I do want to lose a tiny bit more weight, or at least maintain my current weight while other regions of my body grows, and hopefully this trend will continue. Gotta have the best waist for someone’s arm to slip around.

As usual, it does seem like my wide shoulders and barrel chest are a little at odds with my waist-to-hip ratio. I have a full on fridge upper body, a nicely slimming waist, and relatively wide hips. That seems to be holding pretty true, but we’ll see how it turns out long term.

I made a post about this the other day, but I do think I’m registering facial changes on some subconscious level. I can’t really put my finger on it, but something is different in the mirror. I’m comparing before and after unmasked pictures, and I do think there’s some slight facial changes coming on. But still, I’m a little worried about the pace of it, and worried about if I’ll ever pass in that department. But hey. If I don’t, I don’t, and I just present how I want, when I want.

It’s not noticeable enough to really tell yet, but I think my facial hair growth has slowed a little bit. I’m shaving weekly at this point, and it does seem a little bit thinner every time. But I don’t think I have enough data to tell, really, so we’ll see where that goes. It’ll never get to the point where I won’t need laser. I’m mostly just worried that my facial hair will be my last bastion of boymoding, so I’m being a dumbass and procrastinating a lot on that.

Overall, however, I do want to get tf off of spiro once my levels are stable and can potentially be suppressed by estrogen alone. There’s a little I’ll write about below, but mostly… the motherfucking diuretic effect. Oh my fucking god. My caffeine and water consumption means I pee a lot anyways, but fucking hell. I feel like a goddamn fountain, what the fuck. Hopefully I’ll be able to get off it sooner rather than later, especially if I can get injections.

Mild nsfw ahead. As usual, this is raw information, and if you’re weird about it, you will be blocked.

If I didn’t say this before, the information in the spreadsheet is only part of what I’m logging monthly- I have a more extensive record that includes things that feel just an ooch intrusive. This also includes a SHITTON of progress pictures in neutral poses and expressions that I’ve standardized to be the same across the months. I mention this bc I can def see some progress in these pictures. Mostly, I think this has to do with my lower body and waist shape. My ass has def gotten a bit bigger, but the reason my hip measurement hasn’t changed is because that measurement is still dominated by my thighs, and the place where growth is happening is still slightly offset from the largest hip measurement, which, as far as I know, is where it's supposed to be taken.

My breasts have also gotten a lot more distinctly breast-like in their qualitative visual appearance. I think this is a combination of the bust to band size/waist ratio getting better, as well as the breasts filling in more. My nipples are less protruding than last month, and the breast is forming a bit more of a mound as opposed to just essentially the bud forming. Eg, there’s actual structure there now. I can actual hop up and down and yes, they do jiggle. Still, the nipples are leading the charge. I’m a little worried about “cone tits”, or breasts where the nipple develops and pushes out without giving much of a rounded shape to the surrounding tissue. I think its a bit too early to tell, however. I’m hoping to get some nice, serious development in before I start progesterone, and the way things are going… yeah, I think I’ll be good there. Obviously I don’t want them to stop anytime soon, but if my boobs continue at this rate, I don’t think I’ll have anything to worry about chest wise.

The sensitivity “cycle” I’ve been going through does seem to have continued, although the timing of it is erratic. I do very clearly go through bursts of higher erotic sensitivity, followed by uncomfortable sensitivity, followed by a lack of sensitivity. The timing, again, is erratic. We’ll see what it stabilizes to long term- this could be a very unstable transfemme period (side note, I know that’s a controversial topic in the trans community. There’s very little data on the subject, but I do believe it is likely that its happening. The estrogen pathway can easily be cyclical when started. But I digress, I’ll relate my personal experience to that as time goes on and keep my eye out for any papers.).

Since starting spiro, I’ve also noticed some differences in sexual function. I’m not gonna get into the raw details there, I’ve recorded them in a personal version of this. But do note if you’re considering spiro that it's a thing that will probably happen.

#transition journal #trans #transgender #trans femme #trans timeline #transition #transitioning #trans documentation #trans woman #transfemme #mtf trans #trans fem #trans journal

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