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marlynnofmany · 6 months

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Small-Scale Comedy

A lot of the time when our little courier ship makes deliveries to alien planets, the captain will send someone of the customer’s species for the hand-off. It puts them at ease to see a familiar face and all that. Usually. Other times, the customer is of a notoriously egotistical species, likely to feel affronted if the delivery person has a shinier exoskeleton than they do.

Guess which today was.

“Good greetings,” Mur said, looking up at the insectlike bundle of limbs that loomed over him. Our customer for today was colored in white and the palest pinks, edging into more vivid red at the ends of her legs, and the blades of her pincher arms. She looked like a murderous flower.

And while we had two perfectly eligible Mesmers back on the ship, one of whom I’d accompanied on similar deliveries before, Captain Sunlight had decided to send in two of the squishiest crewmates instead.

Mur lifted the package with half of his tentacles, using the rest to hold himself up at a respectable height. I stood behind him with the payment tablet. I tried to stand very still.

Instead of grabbing the box or offering to pay, the customer called imperiously for someone to come open it for her. We were indoors, in what I’d thought was an empty room aside from all the tables molded from the same brown clay as the walls, and the copious amounts of junk on them. (Buildings here were made of the classiest mud I’d seen in a while, with burnished tabletops and patterned walls. But the mess of scientific equipment and photography supplies was much less classy.)

One of the locals scurried out from one of the many holes in the wall that I’d honestly thought were decoration, but now that I thought about it, there had been a balcony at about that height outside. No need for elaborate doorways when you’re shaped like a centipede.

Yeah, our customer was a large bug person spending time among smaller bug people. This was a comparison that was probably only amusing to me, so I kept it to myself. I’m getting good at that.

The centiperson — no idea what they’re actually called — scuttled over and took the box from Mur. This looked like a risky operation to me, and I had my hands out to catch it just in case the leg-sized whatever toppled over backward, but everything went fine. Their many top legs clung to the box while that long body curled into an S, and their bottom legs skittered over to set the box on a table. Then the centiperson manipulated the combination lock with some very skilled little leggies, and opened the box.

The Mesmer swooped in to pull out a sheet of what looked like tiny stickers, muttering and inspecting it for flaws. When I was starting to wonder if Mur or I should remind her that she still needed to pay for the delivery, she handed it off to the centiperson, whose many legs handled it with more dexterity than her little wrist fingers could. Mesmer pincher arms are excellent at doing damage, but not great for detail work.

“Right, yes, money,” she said, turning back toward us. “Put those on the three in the test chamber!” That part was for her assistant, who was already climbing up onto a table full of terarriums and lightboxes. “Tell me they’re doing better!”

I held out the payment tablet. She grabbed it with a pincher and typed in her information, making me glad for the thick rubber casing on the edges. We could have used a metal case for it, but Zhee had demonstrated how easy those were to dent by crushing one with his own pinchers. It had turned out like a work of art.

“They are healthy,” reported the small voice of the centiperson. “I have applied the cameras.”

“And?” demanded the Mesmer, striding over without giving the tablet back. “Show me!” She peered down into a white-sided box that currently had a lot of lights aimed at it.

Before I could ask, something happened in the box to make the Mesmer exclaim in frustration and lift the tablet skyward. Mur made a noise, worried just like I was that she was about to smash it.

But instead she just stalked back over and thrust it into my hands. “Here. Either of you know much about animals?”

I, with my veterinarian training, had to answer, “Yes.” Mur was pointing at me with multiple tentacles.

“Good. Tell me what is wrong with these animals.”

I found myself ushered over none too gently, while the centiperson moved aside and the Mesmer spoke at length about the videography work she had come here to do.

“The final thing I need is a point-of-view recording from one of these, and I have acquired the absolute smallest of camera tabs, and I am starting to worry that the local population is diseased.”

“Why?” I asked uneasily. The white box held three tiny whatevers, each smaller than my last finger joint, as brown as the walls. They had froglike hopping legs, though none seemed interested in going anywhere. Their faces were pointed like bird beaks, and an itty-bitty camera tab sat on each head like a tiny hat.

“Their jumping is impaired,” the Mesmer said from above me. I made a mental note not to turn around quickly. “And I know that it’s not the cameras throwing them off; those have the molecular weight of smoke. I’m more concerned that something is wrong with all of the creatures here. None of the ones we’ve caught can land on their feet.”

To demonstrate, she stuck a pincher blade into the box, which made the three not-frogs scatter.

Wow, she’s not kidding, I thought as they landed on everything but their feet. They scrambled upright quickly enough, but that was some spectacular tiny pratfalls.

From right next to me, Mur asked, “Is there a disease that causes that?” He’d climbed onto the table himself, and was watching with interest.

“It’s possible,” I said. The centiperson was observing in silence, and I asked, “Are they always like this?”

“Yes.” The answer came quickly, in a flat voice that suggested this conversation had happened before.

The Mesmer waved a pincher arm, folded this time. “The entire population may be suffering from something, either a creeping illness or a low-level poison.”

“It could be,” I said slowly, watching the centiperson turn their head toward the ceiling in what looked an awful lot like exasperation. “Or these animals could be built like a small animal on my planet, with a similar problem.”

I had all their attention now.

“What problem?” demanded the Mesmer.

“Their inner ear is too small to work properly,” I said, gesturing toward the side of my own head. “The part that senses which direction gravity is pulling. It has fluid that needs to slosh around, but the channel isn’t big enough to do it.”

There was silence for a heartbeat, then Mur said “Wow,” and the Mesmer said, “WHAT?”

The centiperson just said, “That makes sense.”

“An entire species can be like that??” exclaimed the Mesmer, stepping back to where she could gesture without hitting anything.

“We did tell you,” said the centiperson.

“I thought it was toxins!”

The centiperson looked at me. “The common name for them is ‘headhoppers.’”

“I thought they had a habit of jumping onto people’s heads!”

Not replying to that, the centiperson produced a little hand net from the far side of the table, and deftly scooped up the tiny not-frogs. They really were about the size of Pumpkin Toadlets, just not bright orange, or fully frog-shaped. Once these had their tiny camera-hats removed, they tumbled willingly into a terrarium full of plants.

“Well,” Mur said, “That’s interesting.” He hopped to the floor with a splat.

The Mesmer was complaining to the world at large that fate was cruel and she’d never get the recording she wanted.

I looked to the local. “Are there any similar animals that are a little bigger?”

“YES.”

“Did you already tell her that?”

“Also yes.”

The Mesmer whined, “They’re nocturnal.”

“Flashlights exist.”

I stepped away from the table, careful to bring the tablet with me. “I’m pretty sure you can come up with a workaround. You should listen to your local expert here; sounds like there’s a wealth of information ready and waiting.”

The centiperson spread many legs and looked skyward, which looked grateful to me. The Mesmer grumbled but didn’t say no.

Already halfway out the door, Mur said, “Good luck with everything!”

I echoed the sentiment and followed him with a wave. The centiperson waved back: a rolling motion along one side that looked especially jaunty. The Mesmer’s arm motion was more of an “Ah, whatever,” but I’d take it.

“So tell me more,” Mur said as we walked back to the ship. “The tiny animals on your planet land on their faces every time? How are they still alive?”

“Well, they’re too small to really get hurt by it,” I said with a shrug. “And I’ve heard it said that any predator is probably laughing too hard to eat them.”

“Yup, that’s definitely it. Your planet sounds hilarious. I’d love to visit someday.”

“You should!” I said. “It’s a great place. Though you know what other animal jumps like that? Fleas.”

“What’s fleas?”

“Oh, let me tell you about fleas.”

~~~

The ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book. More to come! And I am currently drafting a sequel!

#my writing #writblr #The Token Human #humans are weird #haso #hfy #humans are space orcs #eiad #faithful viewers from several days ago may recognize the inspiration for this one #'gee that should go in a story' I said #and then I wrote a completely different version than what I originally had in mind #I may even write the first idea at some point #but for now: have some fun animal facts #look up the Pumpkin Toadlet #they are hilarious #frogs #and frog-adjacent entities

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frogonamelon · 1 month

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It's that time of year again where it gets a little warmer and I remember that Amphibia is a show I very much enjoy thinking about. Have some Anne outfits, as a treat <3

If you would like to see what aspect of headcanon/ au worldbuilding had consumed my consciousness like a pestering maggot, feel free to continue below.

Hello! Welcome to I focus on researching one very specific detail until I burn out!

My entire day has been consumed by figuring out how Amphibia's farming works. Like... amphibians are carnivores why do they have farms?

Well, I'll tell you why! The Plantars grow animal feed for predominantly crickets but also others such as silkworms, spiders, snails, etc. They grow produce like cabbage, mushrooms, parsnips, potatoes, dandelions, and turnips as well as heartfruit, a fruit not found on Earth.

In the past, the original amphibian hunter/gatherer societies found that mealworms were attracted to fallen heartfruit, among others. They began to use this knowledge to make traps and eventually began both containing the worms as well as growing the fruit.

Despite mealworms historical prominence in the farming and feeding of Amphibia, crickets are more popular nowadays due to their higher levels of protein. They also began growing a larger variety of produce to further increase efficiency.

Heartfruit is a kind of tree grown fruit with the color of a raspberry, size of a kumquat, and shape of a peach (hence the name). The Plantar's orchard is the only producer of this fruit as its traditionally significant but not necessary for frog kind. They are Anne's personal favorite of the Plantar's produce, being chalk full of nutrients and somehow feels nostalgic to her.

Speaking of Anne, she survives mostly on the Plantar's produce along with cricket meat (knowing that she can at least eat crickets).

After discovering that the amphibians hibernate, she begins to plant pole beans, blueberries, elderberries, and other produce and herbs in her greenhouse to cultivate while she forages and stockpiles for winter. She preps and stores wild rice, pecans, and sunflower seeds (discovered through trial and error). She keeps spare root veggies and other product in the basement. The Plantars help her do this, once they understand the situation, drying heartfruit and salting and smoking fish as well as making jerky out of bugs that they know she can have.

Anne's gonna learn to survive, even if the first winter is especially hard.

#Not my usual content but I love her and this au so much <3 #amphibia #4 Stars Au #I've done the research for what Anne would grow and eat no less than four times and it comes out vastly different each time.#Researching what grows in swamps + what frogs eat + what bugs humans can have + what the plantars grow + ...#farmer anne #trans anne boonchy my beloved #I could not find a suitable place for this but a different farm grows spirulina (a freshwater algae) for tadpoles. Anne will also eat this.#They are sold in jars (like baby food)#This whole au is about emphasizing the differences between humans and amphibians #Anne is warmblooded? Must prepare for winter #Can't live on an amphibian's diet? Eat animal feed and forage #Sasha is more resistant to the harsh climate of the mountains as well as to dangerous substances like citris and salt #She eats orange slices as a power play is all I'm saying #Marcy ends up being the first to truly research Amphibia's oceans because she can acturally survive touching the sea #Desi (4th star) is called the 'Sunchild' for a reason #Can't breathe underwater? Learn magic #anne boonchuy #plantar family

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citrus-soda · 5 months

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Voted Keron's tallest kindergartner-slash-war-machine two years in a row!

bonus ↓

#my silly headcanon is that ShinKero is an absolute unit. By alien frog standards anyway #Shinkero isn't /drastically/ smaller than the adult keronians around him (in the manga at least)#yet when we see the keroro platoon as school-aged kids they are clearly shorter than adults.#NOW to be fair. the size is probably just an artstyle thing or a difference between the anime and manga #if you look at the keroro guidebooks hes like 11cms / 4.3 inches shorter than the rest of the platoon #but im gonna run with it #bonus Adult!ShinKero design that i just pulled out of my ass. hes surprisingly cute even without his tadpole complexion #shin keroro #tamama #keroro #keroro gunso #myart

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100ceruleaneyes · 1 month

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What I imagine frogs eat

#when i saved this image on my phone it looked completely different than the drawing on my laptop???#so i really enjoyed what it looked like on my laptop but not on my phone because it was NOT at all what i wanted #so i had to spend like 20 minutes trying to change the colours to something that ressembled the image on my computer #i still couldnt get it but the first image is probably as close as im going to get #the second image was the first image no filters on it at all #and like yhe strawberries were so much more detailed and i lost it all when i downloaded the image :(#my art #artists on tumblr #digital art #art #meat art #frog art #strawberry art #cw blood #cw raw meat

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tj-crochets · 7 months

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What baby quilt should I make next? Options are (clockwise from top left): shades of green, beetles and lizards and frogs oh my, buttons and butterflies, and rainbows and denim (it’s not actually denim)

I’m leaning towards the buttons and butterflies, because it’ll be a really really simple 3x3 or 4x4 patchwork, but I think I will like literally any of the other finished quilts better

I almost forgot to say, the fabric at the bottom of each fabric set is the fabric that will be the quilt backing

#fabric #beetles tw #lizard tw #frog tw #bug tw #it’s just fabric prints but better safe than sorry #anyway I think I might hold off on the rainbow and denim quilt #because I might use those for like a stained glass quilt?#probably with a different quilt backing #but shades of green will just be a patchwork #and probably so will lizards and bugs and frogs oh my #but maybe not??? I want to think about that layout more

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markscherz · 13 days

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You are everything I aspire to be

If parenting has taught me anything, it is the importance of getting down on your hands and knees and teaching not just facts, but love and enthusiasm for the natural world.

This is my son Q and me. I have dozens of photos like this by now, even though he is just two years old.

Every chance I get, I will kneel down with him and show him the little creatures all around us. Especially when they are frogs. He loves frogs for some reason. No idea why.

It is important that we all see this together. It is beautiful. It is magnificent. We are here. It is improbable to the highest degree. It is fleeting, but it is everything we get. And we can get so, so much of it. If we just get our faces into it and really absorb it.

So that's what l'm trying to do here, I guess. Get all of you to join me in the reeds. And I am so happy to have so many of you along for the journey.

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k66-official · 4 months

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So uh what if I gave tamama this type of snack that I brought from school???

They're pretty good~! ^_^

#sgt frog #keroro gunso #tamapost #and now a word from our host:#i like drawing tamama unhinged but in a different way than mine does

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journeyman-tier-fibercraft · 11 months

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Shawl 11 | Yarn 1 | Yarn 2 | Pattern

I kinda forgot this project existed for a bit. But it's a lot easier on my injury than my other, larger projects so I'm happy to have found it again.

This is more of a Process Knit than a Product Knit so I wasn't really fussed about how I couldn't figure out a good way to make clean edges on brioche. However I kinda stumbled into a much better way than what I was doing before (which was like, slipping the first stitch purlwise and then immediately jumping into brioching even when it meant knitting/purling into the same stitch under it).

Instead! I'm always slipping the first stitch purlwise. Then the next two stitches are treated like kinda like double knitting (if it's a colour A dominate row, I'd slip the first stitch [colour A] purlwise, bring my yarn to the front and slip the second stitch [colour B] with yarn in front, then bring the yarn to the back and knit the third stitch before bringing it forward again to s1yo. For colour B on that row I would slip the first stitch [A] purlwise, slip the second stitch [B] purlwise like another selvedge stitch, keep the yarn behind and slip the third stitch [A] before bringing the yarn to the front to being briocheing with brp1). Probably not the most efficient way but I could NOT get my tension to work for those first couple stitches, this instantly looks better (the red marks on the second and third images point to about where I started doing this method instead of winging it).

#knitting #knitblr #wip #knit brioche #project: shawl 11 #we're renovating our back porch/sunroom and i wanted to knit out there because it's suddenly very nice #and it just happens this project is wayyy more portable than anything else lmao so i picked it up again #the notes on how i'm doing the edges are really for me its enough for me to remember how to do it #if i cared more/had more energy i would frog this whole thing so the edges are less ugly #but honestly it's just fun to knit. at least some of the ugliness will block out. reknitting it would not be fun.#i love my coral looking ass shawl <3 brioche is so much fun #i should finally knit the brioche blanket i own yarn for but i just gotta. do other projects.#when will i spontaneously grow two more sets of arms so i can knit twice as much #i also purposefully picked the uglier side to show the difference in how the edges look #the other edge of the shawl looks like. not great but not awful. but the Drama of the Uglier bit #ugly with full affection lol i love when things are fucked up looking. my favourite gender.

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