#also im getting obsessed with this podcast can you tell yet?

[fayzart136]

The angsty fanart I promised. This moment made me lose my mind. (Though, the entire episode did.)

I'm putting the IDs under the cut from now on, I heard that that's better!

Image 4: Another screenshot. It reads: JOHN (softly): Because... I care about him.

ID: Four images, two drawings and two screenshots of the transcript of The Order II, from the podcast Malevolent.

Image 1: A digital drawing of Yellow from the Malevolent podcast. He's drawn as a gray skinned figure, covered in bright yellow eyes and with sharp teeth. A dull yellow cloak-veil, which is torn to shreds, flutters around him. His eyes are wide and his mouth is downturned.

Image 2: A screenshot from the podcast transcript. it reads: YELLOW: I...I... (Quieter.) Why you, John? What did you have to offer? Why does he care about.... you?

Image 3: A second drawing, in the same style as the first. John looks similar to Yellow, but the "tendrils" of his cloak fall protectively around Arthur and himself. John doesn't have visible eyes (his skin has a bark-like texture since his eyes are closed). Arthur's eye is bright yellow, and looks towards the left. It's nearly the only thing visible of his face.

#malevolent #malevolent spoilers #malevolent podcast #artists on tumblr #digital #sfw #painting #yellow malevolent #john malevolent #someone take the pixel brush away from me before i abuse its power #also im getting obsessed with this podcast can you tell yet?

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

Do you have recommendations for shows/books/whatever with canon/basically canon polyamory?

ok the only media w officially canon polyam i personally consumed are Iron Widow and Hades.

Iron Widow is a mecha scifi/chinese fantasy book, it has pacific rim mechanics, so it takes 2 ppl to pilot the mecha but its more dystopian in that the pilot (male) usually drains the life force of his concubine (female). the mc has a guy shes interested in from the start but she pushes him aside to seek her goals to become a concubine pilot (theres a very good reason for this but i dont wanna give too much away) ends up being forced to work w the most dangerous pilot (spoilers hes actually a misunderstood sweetheart and i love him), her first love somehow finds his way back into her life so he can be their ally and its very clear from the first time he meets the other guy that this bitch is bi af. At one point he literslly saves their lives and i wont elaborate on that cause again spoilers but someone mentioned it in a propaganda ask. They canonically fall in live w each other and start dating. Please look up the trigger warnings first cause theres some heavy subjects addressed in this book. The book itself has trigger warnings listed at the start so if u find it at a book store u can check them this was too.

Hades is a roguelike videogame w dating sim mechanics (ish) -you give gifts to characters to learn more about them, and theres two romance options but you can romance both at once, they're both aware of and okay with it, hinting that they mightve had a past even before zagreus was born (its greek gods one is death incarnate the other is one of the furies, they've basically existed since forever)

From the submissions I got:

ive been told Leverage is like the korrasami of polyam, as in they were as polyam as they could be in a show from 2010, so it sounds like its canon but not explicit because they couldnt get away with that.

The girls from Amphibia are apparently in a similar situation, heavily implied canon, someone told me it was confirmed by people who worked on the show, but i dont think its explicitly stated.

The Kane Chronicles apparently also has canon polyam, although its 2 bodies, cause I think one of them has a god in him or something? I never read the books, but I was told Sadie (i think thats her name? The girl) is in love w both of them, and kinda dating both too i think?

I dont know if Singing in the Rain is canon but theres that kiss gif that got prrtty popular on tumblr where kathy kisses one of the guys then the other, so it looks canon? or at least implied canon?

Sense8 as some people have mentioned has 1 officially confirmed to be canon throuple, 1 that has a lot of hints to confirm but a lot of ppl see it as a gay couple w a very supportive friend ig and someone else said in general because of the plot u could kind of see the 8 of them as a big polycule, although that one isnt canon

HoneyWorks/Heroine Tarumono is one of those songs turned novel turned anime. i dont think its confirmed canon but theres a lot of stuff pointing to the possibility, you mightve see @non-fantasy telling me about them in a few asks. im obsessed and ive yet to watch anything

Penumbra Podcast: Second Citadel has Rilla/Sir Damien/Lord Arum, i also haven't listened to this one but a lot of people told me rilla and damien were in a pre-established relstionship, both got crushed on lord arum separately, talked about it and worked things out to now be a canon polycule

im She-Ra (netflix) theres a trio that is implied to be a polycule at the end, a lot of ppl called them canon in the notes but i dont personally ember it being confirmed? i am very forgetful tho. It's Rogelio/Kyle/Lonnie, unfortunately they lost the prelim round

I believe people submitted some others that were canon but im very forgetful so i cant remember right now

#polyasks #long post

[mitchiegonewild]

aot youtuber headcanons part 1

Eren: "jaegerbamb"

Eren games. ik this sounds like such a cop out answer but cmon...that dude would have streamy-worthy rage-quits, the best lives, and the most entertaining streams

he would repost all the edits people make of him

he moves to twitch after a while on youtube

all of his fans swear hes fine but everyone who's not is like "yeah hes like a 6"

he rarely collabs with anyone but when he does its always with either mikasa or armin who beat his ass, or connie just bc he loves connie

he HATES horror games and his subs know it so they always request those games and 9 times out of 10 he ends up crying

Mikasa: "wiccanest"

she does manifestation and spirituality stuff

she helps all her baby witches and is EXTREMELY avid about doing things the right way so her subs dont get hurt

she looks scary in her thumbnails but shes actually the softest person to ever exist in her vids

her cats are almost always featured in her videos. their names are keyboard and snufkin

shes also pinterest famous and uploads the most random yet aesthetic stuff

she did a gym vlog video with annie once and everyone went crazy bonkers bananas

Armin: "MinnieASMR"

an asmrist and i will die on this hill

he gives out studying tips on there too and does "study with me :)" videos

he did a mukbang once and never again because connie was in his comments like "ZAMN DADDY LOOKS GOOD WHILE HE MONCHIN??😍😍😍" & "THAT CRUNCH AT 8:29 IM ABT TO BUST A NUT😩"

does tiktok lives but falls asleep on them

choked on his water one time while the mic was at full vol still and woke up a good 2/3rds of his streamers

does the best energy plucks

Connie: "conman reacts"

a react channel

hes like coryxkenshin, but he only plays games with eren

hes actually really funny though, and he does a lot of streams so he can interact with people, and he also has a podcast that he hosts with sasha and jean

actually threw up on camera when someone asked if he and sasha were dating (that was the day they both came out LMFAO)

he is strong asf in every single try not to laugh challenge but the SECOND he hears "wenomechainsama" or any low quality meme and he loses it

he and mr beast did a video together once and connie blew a coke up in his face. he was not invited back

Annie: "Annie's How To's"

self defense videos and life inspiration

posts maybe once every four months because she forgets that she has a channel

got acrylics PURELY to show people with long nails how to knock a motherfucker out

actually ended up liking them and gets them when shes not filming

sometimes appears in mikasas videos to do yoga with her

has little 8-minute mindfulness videos

Sasha: "sasha.b"

sasha doesn't do food videos bc im tired of always seeing her with food shit, so i say she does a brittany broski type thing where she literally just does the most unhinged and wild shit whenever and its funny as hell

connie is her sarah schauer and jean is her bestie taylor

shes gone on literally so many podcast episodes and just gets drunk while telling literally the most outrageous stories from her childhood

was a born and raised tennessee girlie that moved to chicago

is mikasas roommate and photobombs her videos almost constantly, but just with a little wave

obsesses over medias and just will not stop talking about it for weeks on end and then moves on in a blink

Jean & Marco: "Jean & Marco V.S. The Paranormal"

they are literally buzzfeed unsolved

jean does not believe in ghosts. marco very much does and says his Catholic Prayers at least thrice in each video

jean twerked for annabelle and she threatened to brutally kill both of them

marcos super respectful and is always like "the dress you have in this picture is just lovely" and jeans like "first of all...youuurrreee nothing but a trashy hoe." and then gets surprised when the ghost targets him

marco fell through a haunted bar's roof and started singing "the lord is my shepherd" and jean stopped himself mid rescue to laugh

a rumor got started that marco was actually dead and a ghost and there is now a national funeral day for marco in the "Jean & Marco V.S. The Paranormal" fandom

Hange: "Science Rulez"

an account purely for middle school science teachers

theyre an actual scientist not just a youtuber but on their off days because they love their job so much they'll do tiny little videos

they are VERY passionate about teaching biology in schools

they have pet turtles and ferrets that they heavily feature and call them their "assistants" (moblit has a "hey, im right here!" voice bite that they usually play)

moblit is their begrudging camera and light man because he just wants to be able to go on vacation with them on their time off

hange covers EVERYTHING from astronomy to fucking quantum physics and always gets comments about how they changed students whole grades and they ALWAYS respond and/or like

#youtube #youtube au #alternate universe #aot #attack on titan #attack on titan au #eren jaeger #armin arlert #mikasa ackerman #connie springer #annie leonhart #jean kirschstein #marco bodt #jeanmarco #hange zoe #moblit berner

[strixop]

cw // bhna 362 manga spoilers, possible character death

ok!!! i have a long, loooong time theory i’ve been meaning to speak about on this blog, and even one of the reasons i started this blog, and with 362 it’s getting more relevant than ever.

call it a sin, but i haven’t watched that much of the subtitled version of bhna seasons 1-4, and it’s been a while since i saw seasons five- i watched it when it was released, and have yet to rewatch it, in favor of the manga.

so i can’t comment as much on the japanese va’s and roles, and i also haven’t reread most any of the early chapters in the manga. but, the english dub of the early seasons, present mic (and occasional aizawa) have been the ones to voiceover and explain peoples quirks. sometimes it’s in a scenario at that current moment (ex. aizawa explaining class 1-As quirks to blood king s5 ep1) but more often than not it’s apparent that it’s just them talking to the viewer.

more than this, when the shows opening plays, deku speaks in the past tense. “when i was young i realized that all men are not created equal” blah blah blah, whatever, we just know that he said that pretty often throughout the show (probably to keep viewer retention, but whatever).

nevertheless, he speaks in past tense. that might not mean anything on surface level, and yeah, it might just be a inner monologue, but why would he say this? besides typical tv purposes, whenever he reflects during the story, he never speaks this way. he thinks of supporting roles, or moments of significance up to his current action, not that he wasn’t equal. so that implies further, complete reflection. we haven’t seen him do that, not really.

honestly, when i had this idea i hadn’t really thought about it past surface level fluff, but then i started reading more tumblr analysis. (unfortunately i lost the blog that made this post, but thank you, op!!)

there was a specific post that caught my eye, speaking about the toga confession chapter. this has been touched on by a lot of people, but there’s a specific log of dialogue that sounds suspiciously like bakugou.

“because for all his triumphs, he was still just a damned nerd.”

that got me thinking, even more. the fact of the matter is, bakugou is one of, if not the only characters to say something like this. “damned nerd”, has both damned and nerd in it, both words bakugou very frequently uses.

though i was more convinced, i let it stew. until bam. 362. besides the obvious whiplash, i basically drowned myself in tumblr posts, until i came across this post.

https://chandralia.tumblr.com/post/691959313676304384/why-does-it-sound-like-both-deku-and-bakugo-are

in other words, it sounds as if bakugou & midoriya are narrating, and that is why im writing this now.

ladies and gentlemen, i believe that bhna is narrated podcast style.

because honestly? it makes sense!!

all of these people, these prominent characters working together to tell the story of the worlds greatest hero. to say that deku isn’t just another all might, and that greatness isn’t born from lucky circumstances and no self preservation. to say that someone “worth nothing” can show their worth.

and it would make more sense!! present mic literally has a radio show, aizawa is literally one of his mentors, and bakugou is his kacchan, his other half. if you ship them or not is your opinion, but regardless of subjectivity, they hold a bond indescribable compared to almost any other character, canonically.

yeah it might just be because i’m obsessed with the image of them all in a recording studio, and yeah it might be that i refuse to accept the possibility that katsuki might be dead, but if there’s even a chance that something like this could be a possibility i will not stop speaking about it.

if all of this is just brainrot, so be it, but it would be so inspiring to see something like this, and would be huge for such a popular and such an iconic shoujo manga to pursue something like this, and hey, that would be amazing for a future au!! :)

#bhna analysis #bhna #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #podcast au #:O??? #bhna 362 spoilers #izuku midoriya #deku #bakugou katsuki #bakugou #present mic #yamada hizashi #eraserhead #shouta aizawa #future au #please i crave #in the unlikely chance this is canon i’m shoving it in all of your faces

[iridescentides]

dia i have been thinking about waterparks using FANDOM to make a statement about parasocial interaction for 12 hours please tell me ur thoughts

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

every time i receive a waterparks related ask i gain 10 years onto my life. thank you natasha.

fandom is literally my favorite album and i think about the words a lot but like. its comparatively much more honest and direct than any other parx release (ex: imsbalidwda, watch what happens next), so theres not as much that has to be interpreted. normally mr waterpark shrouds 8 layers of messages into unhinged lyrics but this release said what it needed to say.

personally (and i get that this may be an unpopular opinion but) the single most off-putting thing about waterparks to me, and something i disliked immediately when i first started getting into them, is the way that awsten knight talks about fans. hes always complaining about people saying rude stuff online, calling fans little gremlins or other shit that implies that theyre annoying, and taking direct offense to the actions/behaviors of stan twitter as if those fans can be considered a normal example of fan behavior??? the parx fandom already has a bad rap bc of 14 year olds on twitter, but he actively contributes to it with his dismissive words/actions towards the people who are literally paying his bills. and then he turns around and engages heavily with the twitter fandom, reads fanfiction written about himself on his podcast, and gives shoutouts for things like fanart or people putting up parx flyers around their hometown. like dude make up your mind, you cant hate the people tweeting weird shit about you but love the kids who send you pretty drawings bc guess what!!! theyre the same people!!!!! and they literally pay for your apartment and give you the endless attention that you feed off of all the time.

all of this to say: an album like fandom would be more groundbreaking and cool if it came from a band besides waterparks. once again, this is literally my favorite album, i love every single song. but fans and media outlets wanna give awsten a big pat on the back for saying something so controversial yet so brave, ignoring the fact that he says pretty much the same things in every single interview, theyre just set to music now. he was openly shitting on equal vision records before watch what happens next came out, he was criticizing fans for crossing boundaries before imhsbalidwda, and he was complaining about unrealistic expectations before dream boy. he gets praised a lot for his honesty, and thats cool, but at times he comes off as disrespectful or ungrateful. and in a recent rocksound interview, he said fandom didnt really change anything. all those twitter stans pointing fingers at each other saying “this is why he wrote [song], to call out people like you!!!” only to completely overlook their own behaviors. fandom didnt accomplish anything. its full of absolute bangers, but it wasnt revolutionary with its takes.

initially, fandom gives people a lot to think about bc its all edgy and witty and clever, but once you wade into the actual shitstorm of parx fandom, you realize its exactly on brand and on par with things that have been said a million times. and even then, its hard to fully validate awstens perspective in these songs bc he often encourages certain behaviors from fans by inviting himself into their spaces and just generally showing that he sees everything they say about him. he exacerbates the “problem” by complaining about it so much, and at some point we all can recognize that he thrives off of obsessive attention and knowing that people are dying to hear him talk or sing or watch him cut his hair or leak demos.

tldr; fandom makes some points. however, those points would be better said by anyone but awsten knight, given his willingness to feed into obsessive fan behaviors and then openly complain about them later. also i hate waterparks, and i say that as sincerely as someone with 14 pictures of them on her wall can say it. im staring at them all right now and theyre staring back at me. i would fight mr waterpark unprompted.

#me: haha yeah fandom is my favorite album!!! #also me: fuck fandom fuck this band fuck mr waterpark in particular #i had to resort to calling him mr waterpark instead of mr highlighter since he sometimes has normal colored hair now #anyway thank you for sending this ask i love being a clown on main #answered asks #natasha tag #bo-obama

[sugarchains]

Title: 12 Months 

Chapters: 1/1

Pairing: Kepcobi

Rating: Explicit!

Notes: HI HELLO My friend made me listen to this podcast and it killed me very slowly and very publicly for weeks. Also when I’m obsessed with a thing, I either cosplay it or write fanfic of it. Have a fanfic. Also I fudged timelines because I love Maxwell and I need her present always. 

LMAO BONES IM SO SORRY BECAUSE THIS WAS FOR YOU LIKE 2 YEARS AGO I LOVE YOU!!! forgive me ok

~

There are numerous ways that he has fucked Daniel Jacobi within the past year. Fucked up, fucked over, mind fucked-he’s been fucking Jacobi since they first met. 

Technically. 

It starts with what could be called a mind fuck because, let’s be real. Daniel’s not stupid. Impulsive, brash, and every bit as loud as his job requires him to be. But he lets himself be eased into it- blows up an office for an appraising look the first month, demolishes a city block for a wink and a smile month two, murders for a hand cupping the back of his neck and good boy stated fondly into the air around them. 

-

SI-5 training was different than other set ups. They’re not military and they’re not Black Ops technically- nor are they spies. Also technically, they’re all three and it’s better to not ask questions and just do as you’re told.  (Rule number 3).

They need to be ready for anything, and that’s the excuse Kepler gives when he calls Jacobi in to spar, just the two of them. He wipes the floor with him, more than once. It’s 4 months since he picked Daniel up at the bar and in this month he lets Warren press him hard, throw him harder into the mats.

-

The fifth month, Warren fucks him over lets Daniel get shot and it runs like this: He took a risk and it backfired and he didn’t even realize it until almost too late.

The rest of the fifth month is eventful, from an objective perspective. 

(“Promise me you won’t fall in love with him.”

“What?" 

”Promise me, Daniel. You know how you are.“

"I have no idea what you could be hinting at.”

“Needy, desperate for approval, hanging on his every word like a-”

“OK, ok! …I promise." 

"You promise what?”

“Are you really gonna make me say this?”

“I’m going to record you so I can play it back when you make a bad decision later on." 

"Fucking….I promise not to fall in love with the Major. Happy?”

“Yeah. I don’t believe you, by the way.”

“That’s fair." 

Warren watches this scene play out from afar, watches Alana curl up on a hospital bed next to Daniel (Maxwell and Jacobi, he reminds himself-there’s no reason to get so comfortable when it’s only been five months and even less for Ala-Maxwell. No reason to be so comfortable right now either) from a small screen on a tablet in Cutter’s office. Internally, he’s a combination of swirling emotions, but externally? Perfect mask of the perfect soldier.

"Well! Serious stuff there; wouldn’t you agree, Warren?”

“….Yes sir.”

“Do you have any ideas about ~who~ they could be talking about? Hmm?”

“As far as I know, sir…they don’t work for anyone else." 

"And Warren,” Cutter states, taking the momentary pause to use his thumb and forefinger to gently force eye contact between the two of them. “Do you make a habit of falling in love with your employees?”

“…..No sir.”

“Excellent! Keep it that way. I know you can and will do everything in your power to stop something silly from happening." 

"Of course, sir." 

He doesn’t immediately go and warn/remind them that they are being watched. What he does do is visit Jacobi in the hospital the next day (sans flowers), lets Maxwell guilt-glare him into leaving while Jacobi is still sleeping to go pick up flowers, visits again in the same day so that Maxwell can yell at him-

("We were here a week, Major!" 

"There were matters that needed to be attended to." 

"More important matters than Jacobi nearly dying?" 

"Calm down, Doctor. I never said that.”) 

-gives Jacobi the flowers and smiles back when Jacobi beams at him.

He also takes them out to eat when Jacobi’s healed, lets him pick the place, and waits until they’re all eating before he drops the surveillance bomb on them. Can tell from the way Maxwell won’t look at him and the way Jacobi is only looking at him that they know exactly what conversation was heard and how they feel about that he doesn’t know and he may have just found the one thing he can’t read his team on-) 

-

Six months in and the mind fucks turning into something beyond his carefully set up control. They had just completed a beautiful mission that had involved blowing up a building and a high speed chase. He could feel adrenaline still buzzing under his skin, and he can feel Daniel’s eyes on his arms on the wheel, so he presses harder on the gas to hear the breathless laugh from the passenger seat. The ride to the safe house is uneventful otherwise, but inside sees Daniel pushing him against the door and kissing him breathlessly. Warren can tell Daniel didn’t think this through clearly (of course he didn’t)-he clearly thought that it might get him punched in the face, or worse, get him a polite and distant reprimand, but at this point life is good and Warren is tired of denying himself so he. He kisses Daniel back, changes their positions against the door so Daniel is pressed up against it. They kiss until they’re both hard, until both their hands are pulling and pushing at each others’ shirts to get at skin and they’re pulling away to ask “Shower?” and “Please” respectively. 

Daniel lets himself be manhandled into a shower where the water runs hot pressure down his side as Warren presses him hard against the wall, tangles a hand in his hair to pull his head to the side, trails a line of biting kisses across his neck while his other hand is jacking them both off frantically. 

Warren swears he can hear Cutter’s “~stop something silly from happening~” playing in his head, warring with the way Daniel moans out please and oh fuck each time he twists his hand around just right, but he chooses to ignore it in favor of feeling the way Daniel’s nails drag lines down his back when he comes between them seconds before Warren.

He’s fucked.

-

The seventh month has Warren teaching Daniel the color system and they spend all the free time they have that month pushing their limits. Warren’s trying to be mindful of the limits but there’s only so much he can take of Daniel looking up at him, eyes wide and blurry with tears of frustration, mouth slick and bruised and begging, telling him please please green the color is green don’t stop again fuck, while he grips bruises into his thigh with one hand and fingers him deep, stretches him wide with the other. 

-

The eighth month reminds him that he’s not a romantic, except that he is. Because in the same month he’s discovering that Daniel likes to be choked when he’s sitting in Warren’s lap, grinding against his cock, he’s also lining up the missions for the upcoming months and taking care to avoid anything at the end of four months out from now. 

He purposely doesn’t think about the way Daniel smiles when he chokes him harder for digging his nails into Warren’s back.

-

The ninth month finds Warren fucking Daniel’s mouth in the office. He didn’t mean to, of course. But it had been weeks since they had last touched, the amount and intensity of the missions beginning to pile up as the trio’s notoriety grew. There were no machines who didn’t love Maxwell and Jacobi’s explosive version of delicate destruction left more than a few people in awe. And the fact that they would only listen and work for Kepler? Icing on the cake. 

But of course that doesn’t go unnoticed and of course Cutter calls Kepler and Jacobi into his office one day in early in the month. Jacobi has a terrible poker face when he’s expecting the bluff, but his ability to lie is almost catastrophic when he’s caught off guard. So that’s how he flushes pink when Cutter asks if he knows how to make something obvious, if he knows how to make something so people can see it from afar. 

“There’s up and coming companies, Daniel. We don’t want to let them get the idea into their heads that they can compete with Goddard, right?”

“Of course, sir." 

"So I need you to make it a statement. Let them know who runs this. Can you do that for me?" 

"Absolutely sir." 

"Good!” And he’s turning his attention to Kepler now. “What a good boy you’ve got there, Warren. I can see why one might do something silly." 

Kepler glances at Jacobi quickly, internally proud of the fact that Daniel didn’t have a reaction to that beyond his eyes widening. 

–It’s weeks later when Jacobi gets the bomb right, runs a test run of the bomb at a location that Cutter set up personally for this, a location that Kepler almost didn’t see if Cutter is to be believed. 

"He asked for you personally, Warren. Can you believe that? Seems I wasn’t enough company for him. Shame really." 

And internally, Kepler is smug as all fuck. Even though that means Jacobi showed his hand, even though that means whatever Cutter guessed about them is now solidified in his mind, it also means-something.

He’s not sure yet. 

"I’m sure he didn’t mean anything by it, sir,” Kepler says mildly, gaze carefully directed outside the car they’re traveling in.

He’s fine when they pull up to the area where Jacobi has everything set up. He’s fine when Jacobi sets of a series of explosions, all triggering a bigger bomb down the line. He’s fine when Cutter congratulates Jacobi on a job well done, but it cuts out when Cutter plants a quick kiss to the side of Jacobi’s head in continued celebration. Cutter catches his eye and the intent is clear-

You can have your plaything, but whats yours is mine and I get what I want when I want. 

It’s a message he hears loud and clear, but it doesn’t mean Kepler won’t still claim what’s his. Which is how he ends up back in his office, one hand bracing himself against the door, while the other hand is cupping the back of Jacobi’s head so it doesn’t hit the door when he fucks his cock into Jacobi’ s mouth.  

Jacobi’s hands are behind his back, not tied just behind his back because he’s not allowed to touch right now he just has to take it as Warren fucks his cock deeper into his throat, take it as he presses deep enough to stop him from breathing oncetwice, before he’s pulling his cock out to slide across Daniel’s cheek. The hand against the door balls into a fist when Daniel runs his lips up the side of Warren’s cock, the fist in his hair tightens when he slides his lips over the head, and Daniel moans long and muffled when Warren starts fucking back into his mouth in earnest. 

He let’s himself get lost in the motions of fucking into Daniel’s mouth, lets himself get lost in watching the sight of his cock stretching Daniel’s lips before it becomes too much and he’s fucking forward onetwothree times and pulling back just enough that his cock slips out of Daniel’s mouth and he comes across his face. Pulse after pulse of come leaves him and arcs across Daniel’s cheeks and bruised lips, marking him as he pants openly on his knees.

Warren braces himself heavily against the door while he catches his breath, caging Daniel in, walling the world out, and maybe it’s a little symbolic but his thighs are still shaking too much to move and Daniel’s expression is too fucking open, he wouldn’t move even if he could walk. He takes the moment to slide his fingers across Daniel’s cheek, before pushing come covered fingers into Daniel’s mouth. They hold eye contact while he sucks them clean.

They’re fucked.

-

The next two months are filled with missions, surveillance, and destruction, so much to the point that before Kepler realizes it, he hasn’t touched Jacobi in nearly eight weeks. Ten months, eleven months fly by with minimal contact and even less down time and suddenly it’s been a year since Jacobi has started working for him. So when he gets a mission thrown at him to vet a candidate for Goddard that is due by Tuesday, the 24th, it’s all he can do to not punch his desk in frustration and throw the file back at Rachel. 

“Maybe you should take Jacobi with you on this one, Warren.”

“Excuse me?” 

“Oh, I just mean I mentioned this mission in passing to him earlier today and he looked ready to blow something up.”

“Ah. Well-”

“It could be because your one year anniversary is coming up, isn’t it?”

“…Anniversary?

“Of him coming to work under you here? Surely you haven’t forgotten. He’s really worked up over it.” 

He didn’t forget, (of course he didn’t forget who does she take him for he’s been steady stockpiling fireworks both illegally and legally for the past two weeks) but he doesn’t want to give her the benefit of having something to tell him about his own employees, so he just stares blankly at her until she rolls her eyes in disgust and leaves. 

-

It ends up not being a big deal to accomplish surveillance on the prospect and return his findings before the 24th. He does it without the team, figuring there’s no reason to pull their efforts into this. Instead, he focuses on studiously ignoring the hints about the upcoming anniversary commemoration from Jacobi as he tells him about the “upcoming assignment” they have. 

In all honestly, it doesn’t occur to him that Daniel would be hurt by this. They’re special operatives for an agency that has their hands in everything. This isn’t the type of thing that should upset people like them. 

Still though, they’re fucked. He’s fucked. So when Daniel eloquently starts complaining about Warren ignoring the date, he realizes that oh.

Oh, they’re on the same page about this. Which is. 

That’s good. 

-

He forgot how stupidly easy it is to loose himself in Daniel, how quickly he gives into need and want, and he looses time somewhere between Daniel setting the first firework off with a brilliant smile and crowding him against the side of the truck with a hand on his throat and one tight on his hip.

Looking up at Jacobi while he’s riding him feels a little too intimate A Little Too Much like this is a love thing, A Little Too Much like they would already die for each other, so Warren buries his face in Daniel’s neck, works bruises into the skin there while Daniel’s fingers tangle in his hair.

He keeps his hands on Daniel’s hips, holding him steady while he leans back and he listens to the way Daniel’s breathing speeds up, listens to the way Warren falls from his lips- not desperate and needy, but wanting-

It’s on a particularly good stroke where Warren twists his hips when he’s in Daniel and he slips up, a desperate oh fuck Sir, falls from his lips. And.

And he has control over himself, he really does, but something about hearing Daniel say sir in that context has him moving quicker than he thought to pin Daniel underneath him and fuck into him hard. Daniel looks up at him in shock for a moment before melting into the motions, fucking himself back when Warren fucks himself in and he’s truly relieved that Daniel closed his eyes because his face is too open and too expressive to be getting fucked by his boss under some fireworks like it’s this big romantic fucking gesture-

He can feel his orgasm building in the base of his spine, feel the heat settling in the pit of his stomach, and he can tell Daniel is close too-from the nails that are digging into his shoulders, to the way that Daniel’s moans are turning into a louder, steady chant of fuckfuckfuck sir please sir please, to the tightening of his thighs around Warren’s waist. 

Warren is close, he’s so close, he feels like he’s fighting it off and loosing as he pulls one hand away from where he is gripping Daniel’s hip tight enough to bruise and moves it to press against Daniel’s throat. His whines choke off almost immediately and Daniel tenses up, eyes rolling back, his mouth, slick and red and bruised, falling open as he tries to gasp for air before Warren’s pulling his hand away, and Daniel comes gasping, stroking himself off to work the come out, grinding back against Warren as he fucks into him twothree more times before coming inside him. 

Warren knows they have to clean up and head out, there’s no way they actually get enough downtime to lay back and enjoy the afterglow-they may have certain immunities, but they are in public, they just set off a fuckload of explosives, and there’s only a matter of time before they have to report back. But for right now, he leans over Daniel (while he’s still in him, savoring the low moan he gives) and kisses him slow and deep, and acknowledges that this is absolutely fucked, but they’ll deal with it.

It’s what they do.

#kepcobi #wolf 359 #wolf 359 fanfic #warren kepler #daniel jacobi #LMAOOO REMEMBER LIKE ONE TIME #2 FUCKING YEARS AGO #I SAID I WOULD WRITE FIC #IM SO SORRY BONES #my writing

[blookmallow]

been playin viscera cleanup a bit 

oh boy

----

however before we get to the blue crystal explosion, i also had to finish the AWFUL, AWFUL level i was on before

GOD FUCK THIS LEVEL EVERYTHING IS SO DARK AND I KEEP BREAKING MY LANTERNS IN THESE TUNNELS AND YOU CANT HARDLY SEE WHERE THE ASH SPOTS ARE BECAUSE THE WALL TEXTURE IS SO SIMILAR AND FUCK THIS PLACE

THERE. YOU CANT SEE IT BUT THIS AWFUL, AWFUL SHADOW REALM FACILITY IS SPOTLESS NOW. NOT THAT ANYONE WOULD EVER BE ABLE TO TELL ANYWAY

HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA

I CANNOT BE DEFEATED

also fucking hell this took me literally the equivalent of an entire shift at real work to finish. i listen to podcasts and stuff while i play this and i just do like. bits at a time its not just me obsessively cleaning in silence for 8 hours straight lmao but like, still, Fuck

i am NEVER going back in there again

next i picked the most well lit facility i could find lmao LOOK at this!!! i can see EVERYTHING this is unbeliEVABLE

hold up what the fuck is that 

ive never seen crystals like this before!!! what!!!

not sure how bad that... ash stuff is gonna be to clean up, i havent tried yet, im figuring i probably gotta laser it 

woAH SHIT!!! EXCELLENT 

hm!! mysterious crystal experiments. looks like one of them may have exploded but its fine 

holy FUCK

THEY HAVE AN ENTIRE BLACK HOLE IN HERE 

OK. SURE 

i have not yet experimented with it to see if it does anything but mostly i figure i should probably just Not touch it :’ ) 

THERES TWO BLACK HOLES IN HERE 

OK!! THAT’S DANGEROUS! ALRIGHT WE’RE GONNA..... NOT FALL DOWN THERE 

dr chris stalls, of cry-sis technology. i see 

#lucy plays viscera cleanup detail

[simxiety]

[ loner | family oriented | lazy ]

GET TO KNOW ME TAG why r there so many questions </3

@viiavi​ tagged me(and mayb someone else??? i dont know tumblr notifs are awful)

uhhhmmm i tag @ratboysims​ @felicitum​ @bullsim​ @keysims​ @bratsims​ and uhhmmmmm any1 else that wants to do it just say i tag u

also here’s a bad edit of my simselfs outfit its cute and basically what i wear everyday gotta wear those nikes get some good ass arch support u feel me

1. WHAT IS YOUR FULL NAME? byrd

2. WHAT IS YOUR NICKNAME? byrdie, b

3. BIRTHDAY? june 3rd babey

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE BOOK SERIES? harry potter

5. DO YOU BELIEVE IN ALIENS OR GHOSTS? ye s

6. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE AUTHOR? i dont think i have one. picking faves for literature has always been hard for me

7. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE RADIO STATION? i listen 2 podcasts

8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FLAVOR OF ANYTHING? ummm dark chocolate or mango

9. WHAT WORD WOULD YOU USE OFTEN TO DESCRIBE SOMETHING GREAT OR WONDERFUL? awesome

10. WHAT IS YOUR CURRENT FAVORITE SONG? thank you next look its a good song ok

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE WORD? ridiculous but how my mom says it like a harry potter spell

12. WHAT WAS THE LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO? ummmm something by halsey i think

13. WHAT TV SHOW WOULD YOU RECOMMEND FOR EVERYBODY TO WATCH? im binge watching greys anatomy so that i guess but also my fave show of all time stargate

14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE TO WATCH WHEN YOU’RE FEELING DOWN? moana

15. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES? yea

16. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR? failure

17. WHAT IS YOUR BEST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? i give good cuddles

18. WHAT IS YOUR WORST QUALITY, IN YOUR OPINION? i have no patience and i worry too much

19. DO YOU LIKE CATS OR DOGS BETTER? yes(dogs)

20. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON? fall

21. ARE YOU IN A RELATIONSHIP? yes! we’re getting married next october :-)

22. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU MISS FROM YOUR CHILDHOOD? no responsibilities!!! no bills!!!! also my moms cooking

23. WHO IS YOUR BEST FRIEND? her name is lauren but also my fiance and my dog

24. WHAT IS YOUR EYE COLOR? dark green

25. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOR? brown

26. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU LOVE? my fam, my fiance, my dogs, my close friends

27. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU TRUST? my fiance 100%

28. WHO IS SOMEONE YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN? my parents i worry about their health and also my sister bc she’s in a new relationship

29. ARE YOU CURRENTLY EXCITED ABOUT/FOR SOMETHING? my sisters dog just had puppies so im excited to see them

30. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST OBSESSION? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm rn sims

31. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TV SHOW AS A CHILD? probably rugrats and also x files

32. WHO OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER CAN YOU TELL ANYTHING TO, IF ANYONE? my dad

33. ARE YOU SUPERSTITIOUS? hell yes big time

34. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNUSUAL PHOBIAS? well i still cant drive so like. driving i guess

35. DO YOU PREFER TO BE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA OR BEHIND IT?uhhh behind i hate when others take pics of me lol

36. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE HOBBY? writing and simblr i guess

37. WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? actually i think it was the adventure zone graphic novel does that count

38. WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? the crimes of grindelwald

39. WHAT MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? i can sing

40. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ANIMAL? owls

41. WHAT ARE YOUR TOP 5 FAVORITE TUMBLR BLOGS THAT YOU FOLLOW? i feel like im on the spot ummmmm @felicitum @keysims @smart--milk @surreysimmer @hesitantpixels

42. WHAT SUPERPOWER DO YOU WISH YOU HAD? u ever seen heroes? remember how peter was like a sponge well i wish i could do that but with like, normal knowledge/skills. like if i met someone who was a carpenter or dr i could shake their hand and i knew everything they did about that and could learn new languages that way too. i wanna b a sponge

43. WHEN AND WHERE DO YOU FEEL MOST AT PEACE? in my bed w my fiance and dogs in a cuddle pile

44. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE? when we ask blu if she’s a sleepy baby and she tilts her head

45. WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY, IF ANY? none bitch

46. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DRINK? water all day every day im a camel hi

47. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A HAND-WRITTEN LETTER OR NOTE TO SOMEBODY? uhhh probably recently at work

48. ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS? as i get older yes

49. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE? when people talk down to me because of my identity or age

50. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO A CONCERT? yea!! the last one we went to was p!nk im pretty sure

51. ARE YOU VEGAN/VEGETARIAN? no

52. WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE, WHAT DID YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GREW UP? a cardiologist

53. WHAT FICTIONAL WORLD WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE IN? hmmmmmmmm probs harry potter tbh

54. WHAT IS SOMETHING YOU WORRY ABOUT? money!!!!

55. ARE YOU SCARED OF THE DARK? yes and no

56. DO YOU LIKE TO SING? yup!!! i dont sing as often as i used to tho its sad

57. HAVE YOU EVER SKIPPED SCHOOL? no

58. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PLACE ON THE PLANET? i really love big bear and catalina island

59. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO LIVE? doesnt really matter as long as its not a big city and relatively close to family

60. DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? we have 2 doggos

61. ARE YOU MORE OF AN EARLY BIRD OR A NIGHT OWL? tbh i am a mix of both now, tho i used to be a night owl

62. DO YOU LIKE SUNRISES OR SUNSETS BETTER? sunset

63. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DRIVE? no :-)

64. DO YOU PREFER EARBUDS OR HEADPHONES? earbuds sometimes headphones hurt my ears esp bc i always wear glasses

65. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? yes and im getting war flashbacks

66. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC? pretty much anything besides hardcore rap, country, and religious music, also nothing too poppy

67. WHO IS YOUR HERO? probs my mama

68. DO YOU READ COMIC BOOKS? ye

69. WHAT MAKES YOU THE MOST ANGRY? when they only brew decaf at work

70. DO YOU PREFER TO READ ON AN ELECTRONIC DEVICE OR WITH A REAL BOOK? both

71. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT IN SCHOOL? i really loved english

72. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS? i have two brothers and two sisters

73. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? flowers for my mother in law

74. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5′7″

75. CAN YOU COOK? yes

76. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE? coffee, purple flowers, the lil potbellies that all puppies have

77. WHAT ARE THREE THINGS THAT YOU HATE? decaf coffee, peas, when people say my name wrong

78. DO YOU HAVE MORE FEMALE FRIENDS OR MORE MALE FRIENDS? uhhh i guess just bc thats who im around more

79. WHAT IS YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION? gay af my dudes

80. WHERE DO YOU CURRENTLY LIVE? i live in southern california

81. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TEXTED? my mom i think

82. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? a while ago 

83. WHO IS YOUR FAVORITE YOUTUBER? garrett watts is fun

84. DO YOU LIKE TO TAKE SELFIES? sure

85. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE APP? digit it saves me money

86. WHAT IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR PARENT(S) LIKE? im super close with my parents and relatively close w my fiances parents as well

87. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE FOREIGN ACCENT? hmmm probs middle eastern

88. WHAT IS A PLACE THAT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO, BUT YOU WANT TO VISIT? seattle

89. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER? 3

90. CAN YOU JUGGLE? lmao no

91. ARE YOU RELIGIOUS? not really

92. DO YOU FIND OUTER SPACE OR THE DEEP OCEAN TO BE MORE INTERESTING? both but i tend to lean more towards the ocean

93. DO YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF TO BE A DAREDEVIL? not at all im a chicken

94. ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO ANYTHING? nope

95. CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE? y...es

96. CAN YOU WIGGLE YOUR EARS? n o?

97. HOW OFTEN DO YOU ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG ABOUT SOMETHING? when i am wrong lol i dont care too much about being right

98. DO YOU PREFER THE FOREST OR THE BEACH? forest 100%

99. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIECE OF ADVICE THAT ANYONE HAS EVER GIVEN YOU? trust your instincts

100. ARE YOU A GOOD LIAR? yes

101. WHAT IS YOUR HOGWARTS HOUSE? hufflepuff

102. DO YOU TALK TO YOURSELF? sometimes

103. ARE YOU AN INTROVERT OR AN EXTROVERT? v big introvert

104. DO YOU KEEP A JOURNAL/DIARY? no

105. DO YOU BELIEVE IN SECOND CHANCES? kind of

106. IF YOU FOUND A WALLET FULL OF MONEY ON THE GROUND, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? pick it up and return it to its owner

107. DO YOU BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE ARE CAPABLE OF CHANGE? yes but they have to believe in it too

108. ARE YOU TICKLISH? yes but u cant tell nobody knows ok thanks

109. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON A PLANE? yeah they’re cool

110. DO YOU HAVE ANY PIERCINGS? my ears and my septum

111. WHAT FICTIONAL CHARACTER DO YOU WISH WAS REAL? sam carter from stargate shes smart

112. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS? yeah i have 10 i think

113. WHAT IS THE BEST DECISION THAT YOU’VE MADE IN YOUR LIFE SO FAR? opening up to people

114. DO YOU BELIEVE IN KARMA? 110% yes

115. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES OR CONTACTS? glasses

116. DO YOU WANT CHILDREN? yeah i want 5 but i dont think i can afford that many someone start a gofundme for my future babeys

117. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW? my best friend

118. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING MEMORY? i told my middle school crush that i liked her and then she told everyone and thats the story of how i repressed me sexuality until i was 20

119. HAVE YOU EVER PULLED AN ALL-NIGHTER? many times

120. WHAT COLOR ARE MOST OF YOU CLOTHES? black

121. DO YOU LIKE ADVENTURES? yes but carefully planned and well thought out adventures where i have a checklist and a binder of all the information i need listen i am v anxious everything is scary

122. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON TV? when i was a baby i was on the news lmao

123. HOW OLD ARE YOU? 25

124. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE QUOTE? to thine own self be true wow super lame and cliche thanks im tired is this done yet

125. DO YOU PREFER SWEET OR SAVORY FOODS? savory i dont have much of a sweet tooth

#tagged #about #simself #i stayed up past my bedtime to do this #im sleepy

[addictedforbooksquad]

P I C K (S)  O F  T H E  M O N T H: S E P T E M B E R

City of Ghosts by Victoria Schwab

Josh and Hazel’s Guide to Not Dating by Christina Lauren

Sadie by Courtney Summers

Hard Sell by Lauren Layne

Bad Romeo by Leisa Rayven

Broken Juliet by Leisa Rayven

City of Ghosts by Victoria Schwab

Genres: Young Adult (Middle Grade), Fantasy, Paranormal

Links: goodreads | bookdepository

Synopsis:

Cassidy Blake's parents are The Inspectres, a (somewhat inept) ghost-hunting team. But Cass herself can REALLY see ghosts. In fact, her best friend, Jacob, just happens to be one. When The Inspectres head to ultra-haunted Edinburgh, Scotland, for their new TV show, Cass—and Jacob—come along. In Scotland, Cass is surrounded by ghosts, not all of them friendly. Then she meets Lara, a girl who can also see the dead. But Lara tells Cassidy that as an In-betweener, their job is to send ghosts permanently beyond the Veil. Cass isn't sure about her new mission, but she does know the sinister Red Raven haunting the city doesn't belong in her world. Cassidy's powers will draw her into an epic fight that stretches through the worlds of the living and the dead, in order to save herself.

Why we love it:

human + ghost friendship

great setting (haunted Scotland)

numerous Harry Potter references

spooky and fun

perfect book if you want to get into Halloween mood!

Trigger warnings: n/a

Josh and Hazel’s Guide to Not Dating by Christina Lauren

Genres: Contemporary, Romance, New Adult

Links: goodreads | bookdepository

Synopsis:

Hazel Camille Bradford knows she’s a lot to take—and frankly, most men aren’t up to the challenge. If her army of pets and thrill for the absurd don’t send them running, her lack of filter means she’ll say exactly the wrong thing in a delicate moment. Their loss. She’s a good soul in search of honest fun. Josh Im has known Hazel since college, where her zany playfulness proved completely incompatible with his mellow restraint. From the first night they met—when she gracelessly threw up on his shoes—to when she sent him an unintelligible email while in a post-surgical haze, Josh has always thought of Hazel more as a spectacle than a peer. But now, ten years later, after a cheating girlfriend has turned his life upside down, going out with Hazel is a breath of fresh air. Not that Josh and Hazel date. At least, not each other. Because setting each other up on progressively terrible double blind dates means there’s nothing between them...right?

Why we love it:

cute, funny and sexy

friends to lovers trope done really well

main characters are polar opposites and yet they fit so well

lovable heroine who’s unapologetic about the way she is (adorable, quirky, eccentric and she wouldn’t change for anyone

Trigger warnings: (somewhat) explicit sexual content

Sadie by Courtney Summers

Genres: Young Adult, Mystery, Contemporary

Links: goodreads | bookdepository

Synopsis:

Sadie hasn't had an easy life. Growing up on her own, she's been raising her sister Mattie in an isolated small town, trying her best to provide a normal life and keep their heads above water. But when Mattie is found dead, Sadie's entire world crumbles. After a somewhat botched police investigation, Sadie is determined to bring her sister's killer to justice and hits the road following a few meagre clues to find him. When West McCray—a radio personality working on a segment about small, forgotten towns in America—overhears Sadie's story at a local gas station, he becomes obsessed with finding the missing girl. He starts his own podcast as he tracks Sadie's journey, trying to figure out what happened, hoping to find her before it's too late.

Why we love it:

this book is like a small wave in #MeToo movement

doesn’t sugercoat sexual abuse

deals with a lot of relevant, important and difficult issues - pedophilia and sexual abuse and what mark it leaves not only on the victims but also on their families, how families cope with their children being kidnapped, how there are people in this world who take advantage of their social status and respect and it allows them to be someone’s abuser

the writing is fast paced and leaves you wanting more

it’s heart-breaking but impactful, it leaves a mark on you and makes you think

Trigger warnings: pedophilia, sexual abuse, parental neglect

Hard Sell by Lauren Layne

Genres: New Adult, Romance, Contemporary

Links: goodreads | bookdepository

Synopsis:

He’s a Wall Street wolf. She’s been hired to tame him. From New York Times bestselling author Lauren Layne comes a wildly sexy novel of business and pleasure. Twenty-eight and filthy rich, Matt Cannon is the youngest broker on Wall Street. He may be a “boy wonder,” but he’s every inch a man. Ask any woman—any night. But when Matt’s latest fling makes scandalous headlines, his clients get anxious, and his bosses at Wolfe Investments level an ultimatum: keep his assets zipped, get a “real” girlfriend, and clean up his act. Only one woman can help Matt with something this hard. For PR genius Sabrina Cross, the best fixer in Manhattan, playing Matt’s steady is going to be a challenge, even if it’s just for show. They already have an explosive history, she can’t stand the cocky party boy, and worse—she can’t stop thinking about him. So who’ll dare to break her “no touching” rule first? Because when that happens, Matt and Sabrina’s game of let’s pretend will get so hot it could set both their reputations on fire.

Why we love it:

group of friends with great dynamic

heroine who is an unapologetic boss lady 

H.O.T. (but also sweet!)

the main couple has a really interesting dynamic as well (enemies/frenemies who would take a bullet for one another and have carried on a casual sexual relationship)

once the heroine gets feelings, she admits it outright

we wanted to read more about them!!!

Trigger warnings: explicit sexual content

Bad Romeo by Leisa Rayven

Genres: Contemporary, Romance, New Adult

Links: goodreads | bookdepository

Synopsis:

When Cassie Taylor met Ethan Holt at acting school, sparks flew. She was the good girl actress. He was the bad boy about campus. But one fated casting choice for Romeo and Juliet changed it all. Like the characters they were playing, Cassie and Ethan's romance seemed destined. Until he broke her heart and betrayed her trust. Now the A-list heartthrob is back in her life and turning her world around. One touch at a time. Cast as romantic leads once again, they're forced to confront raw memories of the heartbreaking lows and pulse-pounding highs of their secret college affair. But they'll also discover that people who rub each other the wrong way often make the best sparks.

Why we love it:

(see notes for Broken Juliet, 2nd book in the series)

Trigger warnings: explicit sexual content

Broken Juliet by Leisa Rayven

Genres: Contemporary, Romance, New Adult

Links: goodreads | bookdepository

Synopsis:

How do you fix a love that’s been broken beyond repair? For years, Cassie Taylor tried to forget about Ethan Holt. He was the one great love of her life, and when he failed to return her love, a part of her died forever. Or so she thought. Now she and Ethan are sharing a Broadway stage, and he’s determined to win her back. Claiming to be a changed man, he’s finally able to say all the things she needed to hear years ago, but can she believe him? What makes this time different from all his other broken promises? Ethan knows he can’t change their tumultuous past, but if he’s going to have any chance of being with the woman he loves, he’ll need to convince Cassie that her future belongs with him. Don’t miss this stunning conclusion to the unforgettable love story that captivated over two million fans online.

Why we love it:

high score on “can’t-put-it-down-ness” scale, great pacing even though story is spanned over a few years

no cheating or unnecessary love triangle - the couple struggles to be together by overcoming their own demons

it kind of has an enemies to lovers trope going on and it definitely contributes to hotness factor

angst but the payoff with happy ending is very satisfactory

Trigger warnings: explicit sexual content

#dailylit #nadaily #litedit #city of ghosts #josh and hazel's guide to not dating #sadie #hard sell #21 wall street #starcrossed series #bad romeo #broken juliet #our edits #pick of the month #bibliophile #bookworm

[gecko-sims]

Simself Tag

Hey! So I’m almost finished with the semester, so to celevrate, I’m doing this thing! :D I’m just gonna say @berrysweetboutique tagged me because I’m a doof and nobody actually tagged me lol

i tag: You if you haven’t done it! Yes you, I’m talking to you.

traits: Creative, Clumsy, Hotheaded

You have to make a simself and put whatever you wish there, traits, anything about you.  After the keep reading thingy are +100 questions I found that you can answer if you want, but you don’t have to.

𝙌𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨:

What is your full name? Kristyn Jo is my legal name

What is your nickname? Jojo, Krispen, Loony. I prefer to be called Nova :)

Birthday? june 28th

What is your favorite book series? I’m a huge Harry Potter fan. I also have a book of short stories about ghosts I take literally everywhere.

Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? Both actually. Thought I don’t know if aliens have been here.

Who is your favorite author? I really like Brandon Mull!

What is your favorite radio station? Does the Welcome to Nightvale podcast count?

What is your favorite flavor of anything? Either apple of pumpkin. fall ftw

What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? Ballin

What is your current favorite song? my all time favorite is Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen, but lately I’m really into Venom by Eminem 

What is your favorite word? preposterous 

What was the last song you listened to? Dirty Car by Studio Killers

What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? Lucifer

What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? The Princess Bride

Do you play video games? I do a lot, but a limited selection

What is your biggest fear? ceasing to exist

What is your best quality, in your opinion? my ability to be enthusiastic about anything

What is your worst quality, in your opinion? My crippling insecurity

Do you like cats or dogs better? Both. Just both. Also. Lizards

What is your favorite season? FALL BBY

Are you in a relationship? HAHAHAHAHA. no. Unless you count @ponderingpigeonsims (she’s ma wife)

What is something you miss from your childhood? The ability to make a fool of yourself without getting weird all looks.

Who is your best friend? Sarah, my tall blonde friendship soulmate who basically just adopted me into her family.

What is your eye color? goldish brown

What is your hair color? brown (or any color that strikes my fancy)

Who is someone you love?  I love like 20000 family, but my grandmother might be the best person to ever person.

Who is someone you trust? my roommate

Who is someone you think about a lot? My brother

Are you currently excited about/for something? I’m always excited for Christmas

What is your biggest obsession? Top 10 creepiest countdowns

What was your favorite TV show as a child? lots and lots of things, but I adored Teen Titans

Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? I’m non-binary so...?

Are you superstitious? yes tbh

Do you have any unusual phobias? The thing under my bed grabbin my ankles

Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? I like both

What is your favorite hobby? looking for cryptids

What was the last book you read? Frankenstein by Mary Shelley 

What was the last movie you watched? To all the boys I’ve loved before

What musical instruments do you play, if any? i’m untalented

What is your favorite animal? Geckos :3

What are your top 5 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow? - There’s a lot! but I check @ratboysims @ridgeport @gunthermunch @tainoodles and @berrysweetboutique like daily

What superpower do you wish you had? telekinesis 

When and where do you feel most at peace?  Sarah’s house

What makes you smile? cats

What sports do you play, if any?  hahahahahahaha

What is your favorite drink? MONSTERSSSSSS

When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? I wrote one for my grandmother last week. 

Are you afraid of heights? a little

What is your biggest pet peeve? When people talk as if I can’t hear them

Have you ever been to a concert? No :(

Are you vegan/vegetarian? nope

When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? an actress rofl

What fictional world would you like to live in? put me in that My Hero Academia world plz

What is something you worry about? Losing people

Are you scared of the dark? yes :(

Do you like to sing? I do!

Have you ever skipped school? yes. Sometimes I just ca’t get up you know?

What is your favorite place on the planet? My Grandma’s backyard

Where would you like to live? Ireland

Do you have any pets? I have a old dog named Frisky, and a leopard Gecko named Wilson

Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? night owl like really bad lol

Do you like Sunrises or sunsets? sunsets

Do you know how to drive? no

Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? headphones 2000%

Have you ever had braces? nope

What is your favorite genre of music? I like pretty much freaking everything. Really like rock and heavy metal though.

Who is your hero? uhm

Do you read comic books? does manga count at all?

What makes you the most angry? needlessly hateful people

Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? real book

What is your favorite subject in school? besides studio classes, Reading 

Do you have any siblings? I have an older brother

What was the last thing you bought? paint for my roommate

How tall are you? 5′2

Can you cook? yuppers

What are three things that you love? scary movies, fluffy dogs, telling bad puns

What are three things that you hate? ignorance, people with no consideration, vegetables

Do you have more female friends or more male friends? i have a good mix

What is your sexual orientation? am a bi buddy

Where do you currently live? USA. send help

Who was the last person you texted? my friend

When was the last time you cried? two days ago watching a Shane Dawson video <_< I cry a lot

Who is your favorite YouTuber? Phillip Defranco

Do you like to take selfies? yes

What is your favorite app? i still play pokemon go

What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? no comment

What is your favorite foreign accent? Irish

What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? Japan

What is your favorite number? 13

Can you juggle? no

Are you religious? nope

Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? hecc yes

Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? very mildly

Are you allergic to anything? nope

Can you curl your tongue? no

Can you wiggle your ears? no

How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? every ten minutes

Do you prefer the forest or the beach? forest

What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? Be proud enough not to ask for help when you don’t need it. Humble enough to ask for it when you do.

Are you a good liar? yes

What is your Hogwarts House? Gryffindor!!!!

Do you talk to yourself? i do, it’s good conversation

Are you an introvert or an extrovert? extrovert, until im not

Do you keep a journal/diary? tried to, but im not consistent enough

Do you believe in second chances? depends

If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do? try to find who dropped it

Do you believe that people are capable of change? occasionally

Are you ticklish? no <_< I swear

Have you ever been on a plane? yes

Do you have any piercings? just me ears

What fictional character do you wish was real? all of them. like all of them

Do you have any tattoos? not yet, but i really want one

What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? to stop caring about what people think of me so much

Do you believe in karma? hell yeah

Do you wear glasses or contacts? glasses

Do you want children? Kind of? Maybe? Possibly in like ten years

Who is the smartest person you know? I know of lot of smart asses

What is your most embarrassing memory? I have a lot and I think about them constantly. Weird things happen to me in bathrooms.

Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? yes. all the damn time

What color are most of you clothes? black bby

Do you like adventures? yessir

Have you ever been on TV? yeah

How old are you? 22

What is your favorite quote? shit happens

Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? sweet

#nonsims #simself tag

[foursprouthappiness-blog]

The Toxic Reality Of Living In Diet Culture And Why I’m Doing My Best To Leave It Behind

New Post has been published on http://foursprout.com/happiness/the-toxic-reality-of-living-in-diet-culture-and-why-im-doing-my-best-to-leave-it-behind/

The Toxic Reality Of Living In Diet Culture And Why I’m Doing My Best To Leave It Behind

Element5 Digital / Unsplash

Diet culture, better known as the disastrous amalgamation of pop culture, media, pseudoscience, and social constructs we are all systemically smothered by, is something I’d like to break up with. I’ve read and researched the topic, follow all of the #riotsnotdiets accounts, and talk a big game about body positivity. But despite my progressive exterior I secretly worry that I can’t completely break up with this destructive system. While it’s easy for me to champion healthy body and food beliefs for other women, I have a much more difficult time following through for myself.

Diet culture is unquestionably toxic, but trying to untangle myself from its totality is complicated.

The holy trinity (body “positive” statements, diet talk, and believing that all foods have a moral value attached to them) of diet culture is difficult to get away from. Individually these aspects can disguise themselves as innocuous, and they thrive in every corner of modern life, which makes escaping them seem impossible. It doesn’t help that engaging in some of these holy trinity behaviors feel good and connects us to other women in a seemingly positive way.

Julie Klausner, creator of Difficult People, is a woman who has long expressed her separation from diet culture. On one episode of her podcast, How Was Your Week, she goes on a high energy tirade where she discusses how if you were to put two women in a room, one who has just earned her Ph.D. and another who has recently lost weight, that the women who lost weight will receive more acclaim and attention. Julie points out the idiocy in this and the sadness of its truth.

Last year I found myself in an adjacent situation where I had lost a decent amount of weight around the same time that I started working a new job. My weight loss was a side effect of a serious bout of depression and anxiety, and it wasn’t something I was actively chasing. For months, anytime I met up with friends or colleagues my new, slimmer figure was the first thing they would comment on, and it was clearly the thing that people were most excited to ask me about. Julie K’s hypothesized musing was right. My new job was a significant promotion in my field, and yet it was my weight that those around me wanted to discuss. I knew all the weight loss talk was feeding into long-held, toxic beliefs about women and our bodies, but I also recognized that it still felt good to hear. People used phrases to describe me physically like well-rested, glowing, and most importantly good and skinny. 

The words good and skinny are often heard together which has caused most of us to believe that skinny is good, and we all want to be good…and skinny.

While I had never felt more mentally drained and down in my life, I had also never received so much positive praise. The experience felt conflicting.

Losing weight has a hypnotic effect on others, especially women. People talk to you as if you know a secret and have accomplished a worthy feat. My diet at the time consisted of hardly eating and excessively working out in an attempt to boost my brains natural levels of serotonin/dopamine. During this time, I also developed a handful of mild irrational fears around meat, cheese, and processed food which likely occurred thanks to all the food shaming (vegan*) documentaries I was consuming on Netflix. At first, when questioned about my weight loss I would attempt a vague response like, “I’m just eating better and exercising more.” But after a while, I felt uncomfortable about being misleading.

I didn’t want to give truth to the deranged diet culture notion of simply eating better and exercising more equating to weight loss equating to a glowing appearance equating to a new job and better life.

Eventually, I mustered up a more truthful, “I just don’t eat a lot” or “depression,” which I would say adding a hard laugh. This laugh didn’t seem particularly helpful as people often looked uncomfortable upon hearing a closer version of the truth.

While giving out skinny compliments seems like a kind exchange, it’s just encouraging the cycle of placing ultimate value on our bodies. I know it’s tough, it feels good to get and give these compliments. I still accidentally tell women they look skinny as an automatic comment. It feels nice to make other people light up, and nothing does it as quickly as telling a woman she looks thin. Most people want to make their friends feel confident and happy, but we have to find better ways of doing it. I do think we should be able to compliment one another when we’re looking well rested and glowing, but maybe these adjectives don’t need to be so related to the actual skin in which we live.

As girls, I believe many of our first addictions were talking obsessively about diets and food. Some of my earliest memories of interacting with adult women as a child are sitting in the kitchen and talking about diets. Growing up my mom was a Weight Watchers discipline, and by age 12 I could rattle off the calorie count and point value to almost any food. Other neighborhood moms were impressed with my knowledge of points and calories and all things numerically related. Early on, I realized that talking about a diet was an essential part of being on a diet, and a great way to positively interact with other women.

As adult women, talking about food and diet continues to be one of the quickest ways to bond with one another. Food noise is something we all have in common.

I’ve yet to meet a woman who has never been affected by a cultural desire to lose weight and make her body “better.”

Diet talk is a quick way to connect and empathize with one another even though by doing so we are continuing to agree with the idea that your body is your value. While I try to not engage, I still get caught up in it at times because I worry that opting out completely will cast me out as a social pariah, and truthfully something about the chatter is addicting. The morning back to work after the winter holiday the first thing I asked my co-worker was, “What are you drinking? Are you on a new cleanse?” I couldn’t help myself, something inside of me desperately wanted to know. We then proceeded to talk about juice cleanses for 10 minutes before coming around to ask one another how our holiday vacations went.

Even more recently, I slipped up and found myself 20 minutes deep into a conversation about someone’s new life-altering diet at a family shiva. I sat with a plate full of bagel, kugel, and rainbow cake while a woman preached to me about the wonders of Keto. The woman explained how Keto focuses on our bodies natural ability to run solely on fats and proteins. Taking humiliating swallows of bagel and schmear, I actively listened as she continued rattling on about how since she started this new diet her body only needed to eat twice a day. The shame of eating more than two times a day immediately filled me.

The shame feels right though—it’s an essential part of diet talk. We want the shame. We hope the shame will force us to be good. While I know it’s not good for me, diet chatter does light up part of my brain sending out excessive levels of a pleasure chemical. Maybe it’s the learning part that feels good. Perhaps my brain thinks it’s about to gain novel, life alerting information that will bring an undiscovered happiness to my life.

Eating is one of the first behaviors we learn how to do on our own. It’s seemingly the simplest survival mechanism for humans.

1. Ingest food 2. Don’t die 3. Repeat.

We’ve managed to take this natural human need and turn it into an issue of morality.

The idea that food is good or bad is beyond damaging to our self-worth, and in recent years this trend has only been getting worse as we’ve started doing it to even the tiniest of our species, babies! Breast milk is better than formal milk, organic vegetables blended on a free-range farm are better than pre-packaged vegetable blends, etc. Cognitively I know food is just food, but emotionally it’s become impossible to feel that way. It feels like eating the good things means that I’m good. This thought is exacerbated by the fact that everything around me is telling me that this is true. Labels declare what is good and even worse what foods can be consumed guilt free. We are so accustomed to adding morals to food choices that we don’t even hear how psychotic it sounds when someone says, “I’m so bad I just ate ____” In fact, we usually agree with them and say how bad we are too. (If you need a reminder of how absurd this actually sounds watch this.)  

These days I’m trying my best to untangle myself from this food-self-worth mess by constantly reminding myself that food is just food and I’m attempting to disengage from diet chatter, but I still slip up and go back to my old ways like compulsively reconnecting with an ex. Even though I see that the totality is wrong, some parts of it feel right, and maybe I’m masochistic.

Walking out on diet culture is complicated. We live here. The damage of a system that values body type and food choices over personality is clearly detrimental and interferes with a million aspects of our lives. Somedays I imagine a time and place where my girlfriends and I have become so evolved that we eat without shame and talk about ourselves in a kinder way. Other days, I’m annoyed if no one tells me I look skinny because that stupid phrase is still feeding something insatiable inside of me.

I want to let go, but breaking up is hard to do.

#Happiness

[blondeandbubblyent-blog]

blonde & bubbly : 12/13

in this episode: it’s all about relationships. whose in one? who might be in one soon? with a very special guest host today.

sabine: hello and welcome back beautiful listeners to blonde and bubbly. i’m sabine and al-masri and with me is the always beautiful madison ware. and we also have our beautiful guest host sabrina castillo here.

madi: hiiii! it is so exciting to be back for a new episode with you guys! 

sabine: before we start, let’s open our bottle of the day which is a 2006 louis roederer cristal brut. so we had more than one request to talk about the relationships on the hills so that’s what we’ll do today. but first i want to just talk about relationships in general. madi, sabrina, what are your dating and relationship tips?

madi: oh i love this champagne so much! as for a dating and relatonship tips, i’d say is to stay true to yourself. don’t try to be someone you arent to please your partner. know yourself and your limits. i feel like, being in a relationship can be very exhausting? i dont know.. im not the best one to give advice so im gonna let sabrina go and take notes!

sabrina: be honest. if you aren’t happy, say it. if something’s bothering you, say it. for me, from personal experience, all of my relationships have ended because one of us wasn’t being honest about what we wanted. just be honest and let your significant other in. don’t hide things from them because you’ll never truly be with them if you can’t trust them enough to be honest with how you feel. 

sabine: and i would say that my top tip would be to say what you need to say when you need to see it. i have missed out on a relationship here because i didn’t say how i felt when i felt it and i have had breakups here because of that. wether it’s someone you are interested in or someone who you already seeing, you have to, have to speak up. 

madi: this is all so interesting, i’ve actually taken notes guys, and you should too! sabine wanna present the next subject?

sabine: yes, now onto relationships on the hills. so let’s talk about the oldest ones that are still going strong first. also shoutout to elijah for the amazing thread keeping track of relationships here, we appreciate it. now first we have kazi and mia who got together december of last year. we have q, sonny, and noemi who have been together since january too. belated congratulations to those three on the birth of beautiful baby winnie. we love her and you very much. ladies what are your favorite things about these pairs?

madi: i dont really know things about people’s relationships? i think they’re happy and that’s what i like. it’s weird for me to analyze my friend’s private things like that in details, i try to stay away from it. from what i can i see they’re all happy and complete each others so that would have to be my favorite things about all of them!

sabrina: i love mia and kazi. kazi and mia. mazi. kia. i know they’ve had their issues but they always seem to come out stronger after them if that makes sense. i feel like whenever i start dating someone new, i always hope to be like them. not just like them, but to have a bond and love like theirs, i guess. like i want to be as in love with someone as they are and have someone make me smile and laugh like they make each other do so. 

sabine: we also have atlas & jinyoung, asher & jae, ace & larkin, thorne, elsa & kana, and xavier & karlie that have been going strong since the summer. in all of these relationships you can see how much love is present and you’re like “well this is a forever couple here.” 

madi: aren’t we a little obligated to say ‘’this is a forever couple’’ tho? because if we dont then we look like a jerk? and what even is a forever couple, we all die at one point or another so.. nothing really last forever.. i think i consider them more like old couples. grandparents couples. does that make sense?

sabine: now potential couples, one i want to get off my chest right away is cori and calvin. i think that’s going to happen soon. also mika and danny? are they dating or not, i have no clue. if they are, it’s not official yet because it’s not in the thread. damien and reina or damien and chanel? 

sabrina: i really like danny and mika together. mika is such a cool person and i think danny complements her really well because he’s equally as awesome. they both have such great senses of humor and they fit together really well. plus, they seem super happy with their relationship which is always an amazing thing to watch! and i haven’t really noticed any couples possibly forming except for flint and atlee. i KNOW they say they’re just best friends, but come on. that chemistry? hate to break it to you, but that’s not just friendship. luca and chanel seem like something might be happening there too. they’d be cute, they’re both super funny

madi: oh i thought mika and danny were dating already? im so behind in all this. potential couples.. hmm.. luca and chanel would be cute i guess.. i really think damien and reina would be good together, flint and atlee i’m not sure.. i dont see it. i see how people say they have feelings for each others but to me it just seems like flint is obsessed with her but in a friendly way? friend crush. they’ll probably date tho, everyone on this show who had a friendcrush dated them. 

sabine: now sabrina, couples we never got to see?

sabrina: there are so many couples i thought were going to happen and then didn’t. xavier and rowan, xavier and me, adrian and toni, antigone and jd, sawyer and thomas... i mean, so many! i know that, like, two of them happened for maybe two days, so i don’t really count those as actually happening. that probably sounds so mean, but. oh well. 

sabine: well sabrina we have a few questions for you but first, jesse says hi. 

sabrina: hi jesse whats up are you excited for vendettas?

 madi: Next one is for sabine and i and says ‘’ annoying and cliquey ‘’ ooh...

sabine: i can't apologize if you find us or the podcast annoying, that's your issue. no one is forcing you to listen to this. when we ask for feedback we mean stuff we can actually build off of. as for the cliquey part, we are going to try our very best to be inclusive of everyone on the cast. and if we're still navigating our way through this so please be patient with us.

madi: i’d like to add that if any of you guys would like to be part of this show all you have to do is dm sabine or me and we’d love to schedule an interview or something with you! next question: ‘’Sabrina! what has been your favorite moment on the show?

sabrina: i loved the press tour & kazi and mia’s wedding!

madi: two amazing moments! last but not least, can you talk to us about the time thomas thought you were sabine?

sabrina:  oh my god. ok so he tweeted something like “i like someone”, right? so i dmed him and was like omg who!! and we dmed for a bit like me convincing him to tell me, and so he was like ok fine... and he said he liked ME and i was like uhhhh okay. why? CUZ I WAS CONFUSED LIKE WE BARELY TALKED?? and he was like what do you mean why ?? and i said we barely talk and he was like “omg. wait. is this not sabine.” and i keysmashed and was screaming

madi: thank you so much sabrina for accepting to come on this episode of Blonde and Bubbly! i’d like to remind you guys that our bottle of the day  is a 2006 louis roederer cristal brut, it is amazing and a rec from me! we are madison & sabine from the hills, as well as sabrina, we’re all blonde and had too much bubbly so it’s time to say goodbye and we’ll see you next time!

#episode 002 #sabrina castillo