#also this set didnt have to take sooo much of my time lmao but i had to gif this

[seawherethesunsets]

The aftermath of Gi Jeong's brilliant backup plan of facing rejection.

You said you’d pass out and pretend not to remember. I was sitting on the ground, so how could I pass out, you jerk?

#my liberation notes #kdramaedit #kdramadaily #asiandramanet #dailynetflix #dailyasiandramas #kdrama #lee ki woo #lee el #lextag #udeokmis #natahjikio #todramaism #bysya #mlnedit #ep 8 #the way i had secondhand embarrassment lol gijeong the mvp #also this set didnt have to take sooo much of my time lmao but i had to gif this #i want him to realise and think it's okay to give it a shot #i think she might have 2 man after her next ep #her boss and him

[marybatson]

Hello again wise oracle of the Batson knowledge ✨ I have a question, comics are complicated and rain is wet, what else is new? I wanted to read To Hell and Back but I wasn't completely sure what stories are set before that one. I think it all starts with Seven Magic Lands? But that's as far as my knowledge goes :/

lolol I think i can help! hmm while I’m here let me just give you the overall order we got when they kickstarted the whole shazam soft reboot (at least where i felt it began) until maybe present day bc i get that it can be a little odd trying to understand where current continuity really begins:

Shazam! (2018) / this is seven lands and yes you’re right, it is mostly what domino effects everything that comes next. but just know some lore “established” here becomes pretty wishy washy by the time we get to the present, including characterization sometimes, so take it w a grain of salt probably

Shazam!: Lightning Strikes (2020) / extremely optional and quick fun read about the other shazam user kids, but a couple side stories sort of additional to everything during Shazam! (2018)

Future State: Shazam (2021) / in my opinion, also an optional read. the future state storyline isn’t super important or relevant to where billy and co go afterwards but i did kinda like the speculative idea of captain-without-billy even if grimdark lol.

Teen Titans Academy (2021) / now this is where you would officially begin if you just want context for To Hell and Back. also must forewarn that this book isn’t actually…good…lol. but that’s just my own opinion…. To Hell happens in between issues of these so I would read the starting issues first then To Hell then again the last issues of TTA since that’s sort of where things leave off for the shazam kids until mary’s tncos

Shazam!: To Hell and Back (2022) / the reason why he’s joined the academy is bc he’s trying to find a way to get his powers back that he + the rest of the kids have lost/destabilized for some reason. the actual logistics of this is probably best not looked that deeply into lmao. anyway it brings back neron, who was brought back in Future State, but whose best appearance was his role in Underworld Unleashed (1995) and just for funsies (+ neron’s characterization) I’d recommend trying that out if you have free time

everything after this is pretty much just dark crisis appearances then dc’s dawn of dc lazarus planet stuff (dark crisis didn’t necessarily have much impact on the shazam storyline plus i didnt really read all that sooo not listing idk):

The New Champion of Shazam! (2022) / establishes mary + the kids minus billy

Lazarus Planet: We Were Once Gods (2023) / billy got saved by mary and malik white aka bolt aka read Black Adam (2022) if u havent…

Lazarus Planet: Revenge of the Gods (2023) / event stuff

Wonder Woman (2016) #798 / weave-in to Lazarus Planet, pertaining to mostly to mary’s story but billy’s a lil relevant

Shazam! (2023) / ongoing comic in continuity. the one where he’s officially “the captain” again.

i’m hoping I got it all but if anyone spots something I’ve missed lmk (there’s kinda a weird gap between 2018 and future state but that’s just bc he’s just doing other events i think….don’t rmr oopsie)!!! So sorry this was longer than you prob wanted. luckily all in all minus his appearances elsewhere billy’s own comics since 2018 have been pretty linear. the narratives and lore haven’t really been streamlined that well but it’s there lol

#asks #featheredmoonwings #billy batson #shazam #these aren’t even in my reading list bc I haven’t updated it but fhdjen I will…. #recommended reading #<to remind me to add later ksjjwmed

[udon-udon]

anyway, a big recap of my victoria bc trip

got up at 6:50 am ish and then headed out at 7:20 took the train and bus to the ferry terminal and then headed to victoria yay, lined up for a a breakfast meal for the ~experience~ and that pretty much took up most of the time. Arrived and took the bus to the royal bc museum, almost missed my bus due to it being full but someone pointed to the huge line to go take the other bus, got lucky there.

The Royal BC Museum was cool, though there wasn't much to it cause there were no feature exhibit at that time and one part of the museum was under reno, but it was still fun nonetheless!! I didn't realize how dark it was so honestly I was a lil spooked at times esp cause I was alone haha. Since it was a very nice day I went down to the Fisherman's Wharf cause I wouldn't have time on saturday and i heard the weather wasn't gonna be good on sunday. Most of the shops were closed for the season LMAOO so there wasn't much to see, but thankfully there was 1 fish n chips shop open and i bought some yum yum, it was very filling. Walked back to downtown and went through the Miniature World museum and it was super cute!!! It was also a lil spoopy for parts of it cause there were portions of it where it was dark and there weren't many people going through it.

Headed to the airbnb around 5 ish, and then chilled for a bit. Was wanting to order dinner but the place I wanted to order to was too busy at that time to take in takeout orders so i had to schedule it at 8 sobs but thats okay cause i was still full from the fish n chips, so i just chilled and tried to nap. The dinner was kinda mid ngl, wish i got the lasagna but i was like "but i can get lasagna anywhere else" it was okay but still LOL. also splurged and bought a cheesecake as well, that was pretty good though. couldn't finish it so i saved half of it for tomorrow's dinner.

The next day was con day!! I was supposed to go to a brunch place but i slept in a little and then when i got there, the line was pretty long and i didnt want to wait so im like eh okay nvm ima just go back home and eat the breadsticks i didn't eat yesterday LOL as well as the creme brulee given by the airbnb host they're so nice. And then I made my way to the con and omg it was a lot of walking lol. Got in and hung around mainly in the artist alley!! I was supposed to go watch the cosplay contest but i lost track of time and missed it LMAO OOPS. I spent waaay more than I thought I would, but very happy with my purchases and wish i bought more haha but my backpack literally would have no room for it. I spent the remaining time at my friends table til like 6:30 and made a new friend that was tabling with her, she was super kind and fun

Got home and picked up dinner on the way, ordered a mixed kebab meal set and it was so good and the portion was huge, very worth it and very delicious. Spent the rest of the night eating and showering and watching youtube and packed a little bit before leaving tomorrow.

Woke up the next day, final day, it was damn pouring in the morning sadly, so I just stayed in the airbnb until 10:50 and then made my way to explore the Chinatown (which I found out is the second oldest Chinatown in North America???? damn). Went to the little Chinatown museum and saw some cool stuff and then walked around the area and the shops nearby. Went to Boardwalk Burgers and chilled until it was time to catch the bus to the ferry.

I arrived hella early cause if I didn't take the bus I took, i would have been late to my ferry;;; BUT MY FERRY GOT DELAYED. So I just spent a lot of time sitting at the waiting area playing my 3DS LOL Made some progress in AA5 again finally, i haven't played it in sooo long ( i really should finish it, as well as spirit of justice, and i still have the great chronicles to play;;) Got on the ferry and played some more AA5 and holy cow the line for the cafeteria was so long im glad i didn't decide to eat dinner there cause I was originally gonna but thank god i didnt. Napped a lil before arriving at the bay aaaand then went home :)

Overall, very nice trip!! Even though I was alone, I had a blast exploring and seeing things and got to take my time to explore shops and whatever I wanted. I had no budget planned going into this and I probably should have cause I spent... quite a lot, but oop.

#adventures with udon

[jackienautism]

fe3h update! well i just finished my first playthrough and i am just sitting here.... the second to last battle was SO hard for me and it was definitely made harder by the fact that i like. played it weird. bc i thought if i just completely avoided her i wouldn't have to kill mercedes so i took all my units on a really weird path and then once i finally killed everyone else turns out. i still had to kill her.

i managed to get to a support between byleth and all of the eagles except linhardt (still mad about that.... i wanted to get the whole set </3), as well as marianne, sylvain, ingrid, and felix (who yeah, i did end up recruiting).

as for my ranking of the eagles... it's really tough to pick! it's closer to tiers for me, bc some of these characters are so close to each other in my ranking. i'd probably go... dorothea, caspar, bernie/hubie/edie, petra, ferdie, linhardt. dorothea and caspar are probably my absolute favorites now. and because of that, i think they're gonna be the eagles i recruit on my VW playthrough (and maybe. all subsequent playthroughs too LMAO) . from the lions, i think i'm gonna take sylvain again bc he's easy to get and he grew on me, as well as mercedes. mighttt also recruit annette and maybe ashe? i barely interacted with them the first time around but i hear ashe is interesting in VW and annette has supports with claude, but i'm also trying to limit myself here lmao. i'm probably not gonna try to recruit both of them, if i even recruit one.

anyway! i'm genuinely sooo excited for claude.... also since i enjoyed marianne so much, i'm excited for her to be like.. more relevant LMAO.

i'm also gonna look into how to like... successfully build my guys this time around because i have a feeling i was NOTTT doing it well at all. which like... i don't need to have the best builds in the world or anything, as long as i'm having fun i don't need to be doing things "right", but like. i think i could maybe be having a bit more fun if i. knew what i was doing lol.

thanks for letting me give you these updates lol! i am having sooo much fun.

HIII OHOHO HAPPY TO HEAR YOUVE FINISHED YOUR FIRST RUN :D AND THAT YOU REALLY ENJOYED IT.... i lowkey forget the second to last battle ebut i assume it was the one w/ dimitri right? or was it the silver maiden one w/ rodrigue? forgive me its been a bit since ive played crimson flower dfgnfg but anyhow! SORRY THAT YOUR DIVERSION MADE THE BATTLE DIFFICULT FOR YOU....AND THAT YOU STILL HAD TO KILL MERCEDES ANYWAY ):

and damn </3 atleast you got thr A supports between the rest of the black eagles! i suppose theres always next route or next CF route that you can get linhardt's... i could tell you the gist of it if you want but im sure youd rather get it yourself. speaking of A supports, which endings did you get :o? like between the other characters i mean?

good tier list<3333 dorothea at the top as she shoudl be. and edie and hubie togehter as they SJOULD be. dorothea snd caspar as your faves are such good choices... quite the duo. and them being the eagles you recruit in your other routes is very respectable as well.. still cant believe that youre willign to Not recruit everyone but i totally understand the mindset as well. angst is good. but it also hurts. MERCEDES..... ooohhh i love her oh so much. she would def be a good choice. good luck limiting yourself btw dfgkdnfg annette and ashe are very good very goodd. im not particularly attached to them as ive talked abt before but theyre both very sweet characters. and have a lot of substance to them. plus their family situations and whatnot are very sad. so yeah! recruiting any of the blue lions to learn more abt them would be a good thing to do! esp if you didnt interact w/ them much in CF

YESSS CLAUDES ROUTE WAS VEYR GOOD.... AND I LOVE HIMS O MUCH ANDHIS RELATIONSHIP W/ BYLETH.... and yessss marianne ): my girl.... i will say that something that happens in verdant wind def shouldve been saved for edie's route but :/ soon enough you'll see what i mean. hope you enjoy verdant wind!!!!

and kfdngdkfg yeah i feel that. its quite overwhelming at times isnt it? as logn as youre having fun though thats all that matter sbut i totally understand wanting to like know what youre doing. a few videos and reading up on classes should help! what were your guys' final classes if you don't mind me asking? if you think youd habe more fun if you knew what you were doing, then id def go for it! good luck w/ everything!

and omg of course!!!! thank YOU for being so kind to keep me updated and whatnot! i always enjoy reading what you have to say and how you've been doing in game and otherwise :] hope you have a good day / night!!!!

#mine #text #asks #anon #my thoughts #my FE tag #FE #FE3H

[venusiangguk]

BUDGETING

dont know if everyone will still want to know on budgeting lol

I don't want to sound like a bitch yk

BUT

I think the most important thing for me was learning to give yourself the freedom to enjoy things like little by little

I used to do this thing where I was uptight for a super long time and then I wpukd splurge huge amounts and for nothing.

I'm not religious either but I truly believe that setting out a little each month/week for charity is great bc it's always comes back in a form that's greater you know.

Pay rise, new job opportunities, idk good things.

Ik it sounds cringe and gross but I think it's worth it !

THE STEPS LMAO

Okay so I always but in 40%-45% like in the bag already savings I mean (this can obvs be adjusted to fit your own needs but if say keeping over 30% is key!)

And work around everything else in the steps below !!!

If I was brave enough I would send pictures of my last year budgeting plan and how I managed to save !! But I'm not 😭😭😭

the first step for me would be to list your monthly income !

Monthly is way easier to work with and easier to adjust in the long run !

Second would be list out things that have to be paid always. So fixed expenses.

I.e rent, MOT, bills, food ( for this I would highly recommend just having a monthly shopping of like say £20-25 - seems un do able but isnt !!! Frozen veggies are your best friend:)) gym membership, spotify, prime all of that.

Third which is super important for me at least would be to set out a like reward bonus for yourself.

( in cash preferably- like so once it's gone it's gone you know- like monthly rewards for yourself - sometimes you use it and sometimes you dont!! )

Fourth - ALWAYS SET AN EXTRA LIL FUND FOR THE UNEXPECTED THINGS!!! ( car crashes, dentist, medicine if your toaster breaks if your fridge breaks !! all of that lovely stuffs 😃)

So when you look at all that infront you- really just scrutinise it.

Like -

How much of that do you really need to spend?

Is there anything you can cut out on ?

This is super important at least to me bc then I see that yh shit - that is crazy I'm spending useless money )

I think that also keeping student loans separate is SUUUUPER SUUUUPER bc it just. Idk if anyone else is like this but seeing how much they expected from me to be able to learn always depressed me so I made a separate folder for that- made it pretty so it didnt look sooo bad lmao ) but I think the biggest part was getting to grips that I had all that to pay back!!!

Then like random things :

Concerts, events, holidays.

Like make sure you have them planned in advance and make separate funds for all of them.

To cater to what they need! Like for a concert- hotel and food money and merch buying and army bomb and a NEW OUTFITTTT lmao)

And yh - I think setting up a teeny amount for charity or to help ppl is always great aswell bc well idk you feel good and it does always come to find you- doesnt have to be a large amount. Maybe even a food box every month or smn cute and sweet like that !!

This is how I did it : ( kind of irrelevant and just abt silly me lmao but maybe itll help(?))

So i used to work night shifts at this horrible packing place ( it was freezing too but the pay was so good! It was £15-18 an hr ( sometimes even more )and I used to work from 11pm-4am 7 days a week like I didnt take a day off until I quit and i did it for 2 years ! That was like 50k but I had a lot of things to pay off and my parents wanted nearly all of it back off of me 😃)

This is also the NOT the job I wanted yk? Like I used to work with a bunch of stinky ass men and it sucked but I had to do it bc well my parents kicked me out bc I was non religious looool.

I was never enough and I just got kicked out yk? ( oh no not my sob story but just to put it into perspective sort of like I was fucking depressed my money was going like wildfire )

So I had to kind of take everything/every opportunity. They expected a lot back from me too in that way like alot of my learning was going to them :/)

From 5-7

I worked at a bakery ! Cooking and baking and having fun! That was the best job I had the pay wasnt all that but it was something and I needed everything I could get ! It wasnt everyday either but so and so.

I also am bilingual so that way I was able to get a job as a teacher in a daytime school teaching which I did voluntarily! For the first year !

( I had this routine for 2 years!!)

So like I was getting an okay amount from these jobs but god heavens I was spending so unnecessary.

Like a high price for a shit apartment where I would have to pay for things to get fixed to and that was really expensive.

My parents also took alot first year earnings and that's when I was like well shit I have nothing I really need to like get my shit together yk?

There was student loan (- I dont want to like envoke sympathy bc of all this I just wanna like say that my money was kind of slipping away yk I feel like I'm being annoying 😭😭😭 ) - and just a whole lot of wasting on food ( my biggest expenditure- at the time I was struggling with binge eating and bulimia so 🙃🙃 yh )

Dumb shit off amazon, and like just crap you know

Also car petrol and mot and car stuff. and bus and train fares just money can go so easily.

It was just super super tiring to have juggle all these balls at once but when I got the hang of it like doing all those steps I felt more free and more aware of myself and I was able to enjoy while still getting yk the most out of what I do.

I work as a translater/teacher now so the pay is good and like using these steps is how I got the most out of myself

Uh idk If this even makes sense anymore and I'm sorry if come off as bitch too

I don't mean to or come with a sob story

I just think its important to like realise that no matter what and who in your life demands things from you - you always have to choose to look after yourself first- how you choose too look after yourself is ultimately how you choose to look after others too ! Take good care of yourself - give yourself a clearer mind and you'll be able to see a bigger picture- outside of the one built for you !!

If your struggling with other issues - mental health too it can help bring clarity to that too ! Bc it's some sort of semblance.

Gosh I feel gross what if you have to read all of this 😭😭😭

I hope it helps you ♡♡

Budgeting is really important bc we need to buy houses!!

Need property!!!

Start our own businesses !!

Become our own bosses !

It's just super important to know your expenses you can know yourself better too !

And you can be more mature and more self aware

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Gosh I really ate your ear off with this one

for everyone wondering about our bestie w 50k savings: this is her story !!

#u did a good job getting through all that and doing well for urself <3 #ask #anon #stellanswers <3

[petscrub]

long post about my show

sorry idk how to do a read more on mobile

sooo about my show last night lmao. i was definitely nervous and i think it ofc reflected on me during the performance which is like. ok. thats fine, i expected that. when i got there there wasn’t a lot of ppl there and i talked to a few ppl and they were nice and friendly. and then later i started to set up my stuff and we had to find the right plugs and cords and such for my laptop but eventually we got it working. my music sounded p good all loud and stuff. and then as ppl slowly started to come in i went up to perform and i felt a bit awkward mainly bc there werent too many ppl and i was just singing. i think what will help my significantly in the future is having something to do whether playing the guitar or piano (preferably guitar) bc i just do not consider myself a singer and for that to be the only thing going on for me was kinda taking me out of the zone. i danced a little but the crowd was like. not dead? but not very dance-y. i wanted them to really vibe and there were a few people who were but majority were just kinda softly bopping their heads or something which is fine ig. i thought i didnt sound very good on the mic (probs bc first time performing live and it was hard to hear myself) but then i saw a video of me singing later and i think it was decent and better than what i thought. i did have some fun and it was nice to hear everyone cheer and clap and what not after each song that definitely held me in there. but overall i think the vibe was not mine. like it was so indie which is kinda my thing but not entirely. it was almost like. straight white indie. not like gay indie u know ? everyone seemed pretty straight (lots of very obviously cis straight girls and boys). and they seem to be the kinda music lovers who probably froth at the mouth when listening to like. phoebe bridgers. idk i say this bc the guy who went on after me was very good but he just had his guitar and sang. no backup instrumentals at all. and he sounded great! but it was just that kinda vibe that was so different than mine. i knew absolutely no oneeee there. and everyone loved this guy after me bc they all KNEW him. like lifelong friends. and the straight girls next to me were like wetting themselves just watching him lmfao. i was like ok yea i dont see myself really making a lot of friends at this place. or in general anywhere hahahah. i talked to some guys who were really chill and nice and honestly i got much better vibes from the straight guys than i did from the girls ? idk. they just seemed like they were there for the cute boys while the guys were there bc they are genuine music nerds. and they were very sweet to me for the most part. very helpful as well. i just felt very out of place and uncomfy bc i obviously dont know what im doing when it comes to this kinda stuff yet. so i decided to leave after the second set and i felt kinda bad about it but my thoughts were building up and i was like ok i gotta go. so on the train ride home i felt intensely suicidal, like more so than i usually get. i cried on the train and i think its honestly mainly bc i dont feel like i belong anywhere and that i will never find a place where i do feel myself and understood and accepted. and i kinda spiraled. after some reflection with gf when i got home, i realized it wasn’t even so much the performance that made me feel bad but just the thought of loneliness and how i feel like i will never fit in anywhere or make friends that are really meaningful to me. it made me wanna give up in the moment. in music and in life lol but i do know i tend to be a black or white kinda person. anyway. hopefully for my next show ill be more prepared and also be able to play some parts of my music live bc i think that will be what saves me really. and makes me have a good time. and also hopefully i will be in an environment that vibes more with what im putting out there. although i did got a lot of compliments on my set, like everyone was pretty supportive. it just felt weird.

[certifiedceraunophile]

Hi! A fan of your writing here. I just love the way you write Caroline. An Avoidable Heart is my comfort fic and I am constantly in awe with the way you write and craft the dynamics in that story. Caroline's inner monologue is just priceless and God! I just love that intro scene where Caroline is walking into the Mikaelson compound with vampires and hybrids in the surrounding ready to pounce on her.

I would love to hear how you would have visualized Caroline crossing over into TO or not? Like in what season and why? How it would have likely gone?

Thank you!

First of all lovely anon gimme a moment to breathe, asdfghjkl why are people so lovely 😭😭🥺✨ It means sooo much to me that you’d take the time to jump into my inbox and send these kind words, like please I’m not worthyyyyy, But you make me smile and feel really freaking warm so *handcuffs your hand to mine* you aint leaving 💖✨💞🙃

But OK ALSO oh my god dude THAT CAROLINE WALTZS INTO THE COMPOUND AND TAKES ON A COUPLE HUNDRED VAMPIRES BY HERSELF SCENE???? Ughhhhh I’m sorry but I have SUCH a boner for Caroline in that, like my badass -I admit kinda op- QUEEN IS HERE and she’s fucking shit up, I’m sorry but I love that scene so much it’s so dear to me I was killing myself over how self-indulgent and grossly Over powered Caroline is but like idgaf man it’s such a hot scene and Caroline is practically invincible and we just love to see that, so seriously lovely anon, you telling me you LOVE that scene??? Puts the biggest smile on my face and reassures me a LOT bc I was whining and cribbing over how absolutely unbalanced that scene is to literally everyone BUT LIKE YOU JUMPING OUT OF NOWHERE and pointing that exact scene UGHH…...meant to fucking be the both of us 💖💞✨

And ALSO Caroline’s monologue is quite honestly the easiest inner monologue out of the three voices I wrote for that work, Klaus’s is the real pain in the ass tbvh like it is NOT easy writing pretentious besotted losers with a Kardashian complex especially when you need to make them sound cool when they’re the lamest OP dude bros to ever exist - and no I don’t hate Klaus although I seem to try my darndest to convince ppl I do- I just personally believe that a feral fucker like that with a thousand years of existence under his belt can grow a pair and graduate from his kindergarten level of emotional maturity to adult sometime soon, But then on the flipside he’s so grossly adorkably smitten and feral for Caroline plus hella horny for her all the time that its usually easy to write the trashed and devoted idiot he is into something pretentious and powerful and potent when relating to his unflappable arrogance and his narcissism, but sometimes I also need him to be *deep* and ffs profound for the sake of the plot and jfc my muse just wont work with me on that, she’s like I’m sorry I’m not about to bust my ass to make this mongrel intelligible like no sir all I wanna do is make him uncomfortably horny for Caroline and leave him like that.

So smh yeah the struggle is real….but lmao Caroline is just so precious and fiercely protective and just so achingly lonely in that story, so desperate for connection and trust and intimacy yet so guarded and impervious to everyone like it hurts me to write her like that but it really challenges me as an author to balance out her inherent light with the “void” I create in her and through her, so yeah it’s a very fulfilling task and I wouldnt change it one bit, and also I had to balance out her physical op-ness w half a millennium of the ugliest emotional trauma lol so I guess that figures, but the point being….once again I am overjoyed knowing that you liked a facet of the story that I tried so hard to make as authentically Caroline and achingly real and moving as I can and I cannot possibly feel more accomplished than rn for it so ty ty ty ty for reaching out to me and telling me *tackle hugs* It makes me GIDDY knowing that you enjoyed that particular part of the story like ugh stab me please you're too sweet.

And ok NOW, coming to The Originals part of the ask, (also please note that when I say TO headcanon; Hope does not exist, Hayley is a dead in a ditch and ofc Klaus will stop being that lil bitch they tried to pawn off as Klaus in TO) 

HEADCANON 1

Honestly my biggest headcanon when it comes to TO crossovers somehow always include non-humanity!Caroline like it’s just so perfect to me?? The opportunity to make shit BLOW UP b/w them like imagine the DEBAUCHERY, the heat, the SEXUAL TENSION, the repression of one Klaus Mikaelson, the EXPLORATIONS, and omg the role reversal when Klaus has to be the voice of moral reason between them and not bc he believes Caroline would not be able to stand herself if she does something heinous and monstrous but bc he wants her to be completely and utterly herself, and yk *aware*, when she DECIMATES ppl to the ground and is in full-on predator mode, like he wants her monster to come out and play with him when no part of Caroline is locked away or suppressed, so obviously when she is w/o her humanity KLAUS exercises restraint on her behalf, like can you imagine that, Klaus restraining himself and being the vague, extremely broken and just largely inaccurate moral compass between the two of them for ALL the wrong reasons- and the entirety of NOLA just standing there watching him herd this baby vampire who seems to be intent on riling him up and angering him when all she is doing is giving him a massive hybrid hard on, like IMAGINE THE GOODNESS of non-humanity Caroline wrecking NOLA and Klaus letting her wreck it bc he is helpless in the face of Caroline Forbes and also bc he is quite honestly *enjoying* the debauchery himself so why put a damper on the festivities.

-I might wanna add that I favour this headcanon a lot bc I genuinely do not even remotely *like* the idea of NOLA as Klaus's chosen place to set his roots so like I would love Caroline going to NOLA and destroying everything there just bc I detest NOLA and the storyline behind it in TO. (yes is it petty? Obvi, but like I am a petty soul and I make no apologies ma’am)

HEADCANON 2

So yeah that’s my main TO headcanon, but my other one being, one I talk about very frequently, scream about in tag rants to an obsessive level, and like this is a cracky one but still very valid, where Caroline rolls up to NOLA humanity intact and all, finds Hayley preggo and is just laughing her fucking ass off bc anybody ANYBODY, with half a brain and a two minute convo w klaus would know how UTTERLY stupid the entire baby shit is especially when it’s with an immemorable one night stand, and Caroline’s just losing her shit about how like an entire city is obssessed w this baby and she just straight up tells Klaus he’d SUCK as a dad (which he really does tho like he was a shitty fucking dad canonically too) and Klaus is just like *sigh* girl tell me about it. I mean basically he’s finally relieved that someone is on his side about the whole baby thing and how he definitely does not want his entire millennium of life to finally sum up to this one squalling leaking stinky infant/unicorn Hayley is apparently baking in her oven, and I say this headcanon is cracky bc klaus would never have put up w this mess long enough for Caroline to come in and sort it out, there’s this preferred method of disposal of his called heart ripping that would've been employed quite early on and honestly saved us all a lot of brain cells and minused years of life, bc let’s be real any Klaus who’s NOT a lil snivelling bitch wearing a Klaus skinsuit would’ve yeeted the baby and the mama first chance he got, and that’s just how I see it.

Lmao I really hope I didnt scare you away w my *strong* opinions Ik they can be a bit much but I enjoy having them so theyre not going anywhere, anyways this ask answer got WAYYYY too long but I’m hoping I answered your question well with this or atleast left you slightly confused and bemused over my feral screaming....either ways I’m really really really happy to have got your ask and the chance to rant so much bs, Twas cathartic and honestly I had nothing to do today so I was more than happy to dish this baby out for you. Thank you so much sweet anon for putting a smile on my face today I am absolutely HONOURED by your words you’sa cutie 💖💞✨🗣🗣

#first of all #LONG POST #second #I did rant a LOTTTT more than what was prolly expected but lmao am I sorry? #no #anyway so those are my general drivel-tastic thoughts straight from glitter graveyard brain #hope you enjo navigating through so much bs anon #and I hope someone puts a smile on your face that's as large and bright as the one you've put on mine today #anon asks #ask certified ceraunophile #anti the orginals #tvd headcanons #tvd #klaroline #anon youre the sweetest #shakes hand cuffed hand #you stuck w me lovely #💞💞

[im-a-meteorite]

i’ve been marathoning the harry potter movies since im in quarantine and i’ve been taking some notes. i’ll post them all bc why not 

sorcerer’s stone

harry knowing that there’s no post on sunday,, a genius

hedwig’s theme playing when harry looks out of the window and sees an owl flying by, very nice

hagrid doing magic at the house on the rock thing,, wouldnt the ministry be able to track that?? since there’s no wizard that lives there, they should be alerted?? or did they remove the trace from hagrid once he got expelled?? like does it work by the trace only or? bc if it doesn’t work by location then how would they know that a muggle witnessed the magic?? idk anymore

the kids staring at the nimbus 2000 and saying its the fastest model yet,, then the camera zooming on the handle w/ the background blurred -> the most straight forward foreshadowing

hagrid is actually the worst person to take harry on his tour situation,, like bro literally left him in the middle of a train station

the weasleys and harry going to the platform while theres a shit ton of ppl walking around,,, statute of secrecy where??

the great hall is on the first floor?? i thought it was on the ground floor

ew the hats

i wish the movies had dumbledore’s weird few words speeches

“theres not one witch or wizard that went bad that wasnt in slytherin” broooo

mcgonagall is so savage i love her

snape is an asshole

a crap ton of chessboards in the great hall study hall scene,, foreshadowing the challenges?

madam hooch really yeeted herself out of neville’s way

✨🥰 oliver wood 🥰✨✨

harry really wiped the troll buggers on his robe,, disgusting

snapes hair is lowkey on fleek tho,,

making most of the slytherins ugly bc they’re the “evil” house is just a disservice to all the inbreeding

hermione setting snape on fire is truly iconic and very extra tbh like sis why tf would u know a spell like that

seasonal transition wasnt that great tbh

overall the directing style is kinda basic

“not in the restricted section,,” rule breaking hermione is the best hermione

dumbledore’s handwriting is so extra and loopy like tf?? but it fits his character

the hedwig flying season transition was good

“immortal?” “it means you’ll never die.” “i know what it means!”

50 points each for being out of bed??? wtf is this point system

filtch saying there’s werewolves in the forbidden forest,,, thats illegal sir

hagrid calling the trio by their first names but draco by his last,, we love favoritism

harry’s thoughts r so ridiculous,, “snape doesnt want the stone for himself, he wants it for voldemort!” lmaoo wtf,, evidence pls sir,, u don’t even know he was a death eater. was it the bad vibes?? bc same

harry figuring out that the person who gave hagrid the dragon egg is voldy,, a genius

“kill us faster?? now i can relax!!” ron is so iconic i love him

“lucky we didnt panic!” “lucky hermione pays attention in herbology”

how is it that harry’s hand burned quirrel but not the skin on harry’s neck?? that shit makes no sense

yeah i really cant imagine this dumbledore fighting voldy in movie 5

hermione’s headband in the reunion scene is so cute i love it

chamber of secrets:

how is dobby even allowed to just jump on the bed?? like is it bc harry isnt his master that he can do smth like that

“dobby has heard about harry potter’s kindness” or whatever,, bro u work for the malfoys either the elves gossip or draco is waxing poetry about harry

aunt petunia saying “we have ice-cream” after that whole affair is just ridiculous

DIAGONALLY

this seems like the extended version bc i dont remember the borgin and bruks scene to be that long

the close ups with lucius and ginny’s books r insane lmao like chris columbus made it so obvious

also mr weasley’s acting is so funny like its so exaggerated

lucius malfoy is so dramatic and extra we love it

also lucius knowing hermione’s name and “draco’s told me all about you”??? bro whats with draco?? lmaoo

snape really got mad with the whole car business

mandrakes r fucking weird bro how did jkr come up with that

PERCY WALKING WITH PENELOPE CLEARWATER??? HOW DID I MISS THAT??

omg colin had so many lines?? wow

omg erol with the fucking howler,, iconic

ron’s facial expressions?? pure comedy, rupret is so good

LOCKHEART REALLY SAID “GOOD GIRL” THEN WINKED AT HERMIONE

“pesky piksy pescinomy” this bitch dumb

“why is it always me?” poor neville

omfg ✨🥰 oliver wood 🥰✨

ahh using the seeker position for fighting

ew draco used the m-word

the shit the basilisk is saying is so lame lmaoo

how does harry not recognize that he’s hearing a different language?? or does parsaltongue act weird

HOW IS THE WHOLE SCHOOL IN THE SAME CORRIDOR???

“i know the counter-curse that could’ve spared her” bitch the dirty looks he got?? omfg

the movies would’ve been 500% better if they had lee jordan’s iconic quidditch commentary

“scarhead” “TRAINING FOR THE BALLET, POTTER?”

“what did you expect?? pumpkin juice??” madam pomfery is a queen

dobby is dumb dumb

“who am i, hedwig? what am i?”

“reading? i didnt know you could read?”

“look at my face” “look at your tail!”

“you can’t cancel quidditch!”

“oh harry, if you die down there, you’re welcome to share my toilet”

lockheart: do you live here? ron: no *smacks him in the head with a rock*

“voldemort is my past, present and future” are all slytherins this dramatic??

the tension between hermione and ron in the last feast was insane

justin filtch fletchy is so ugly im so sorry i cant

prisoner of azkaban:

im sorry but harry doing underage illegal magic pisses me off every time

aunt marge 🤢

“do they use a cane boy?” “oh yeah, i’ve been beaten loads of times”

that whole scene is so chaotic

“you cant do magic outside of school!” “oh yeah? try me”

sirius really dumb for barking at harry like it makes no sense

the knight bus is probably one of the best things in this movie

“whatcha doing down there??” “i fell over” “whacha fell over for?” “i didnt do it on purpose!” “well come on then, lets not wait for the grass to grow”

harry leans over and looks for the grim, stan: “whatcha looking at?”

“yeah take it away ernie,, its gonna be a bumpy ride”

this whole thing is written and directed so perfectly

i hate how they replaced tom bc it really made no sense

all the bits of magic in the leaky caldron is so genius

fudge reminds me of trump but like dumber

the blue lighting and coloring is just great, it fits the colder vibe of the story (not like HBP with the hazy/blurry effect)

ugh the glass and mirror transitions are one of my favorite things,, alfonso curon really did that 

i love the weasleys,, also everyone looks great in this movie

omg the scene with arthur talking to harry about sirius with the sirius poster always being in sight?? amazing

contrast of light and darkness just echos the whole dementor vs patronus situation

i dont even understand why remus took the train other than for the nostalgia

the lights slowly turning off in the different carriages?? amazing

the visual representation of the dementors’ effect is great

REMUS!!!

i wish there was more emotion from remus when he’s talking about sirius,, like that was one of his only friends

snape clapping literally twice for remus,, ajhshsh

ahh the placement of the slytherin and gryffindor tables right beside each other to increase the tension and further the plot

oh yea the new dumbledore, also cool hat he has

omg the new fat lady painting

omg the candy scene?? so cute i love lads being lads. that scene just echo’s dumbledore’s light in the dark quote bc its storming outside at night and they’re creating a happy environment within the dark especially with the dementors

ah yes the clock references + following the bird to show us important parts of hogwarts and putting the whomping willow in the forefront

ron’s reading of harry’s tea leaves,, still on point tho. ron really has a knack for divination

buckbeak! omg drapple

draco is so hot especially with that ring also the slytherin pins??

“oh yeah, terribly funny, really witty. god, this place has gone to the dogs”

the kids look so messy i love it + harry’s uneven tie

HERMIONE CLINGING TO RONS ARM!!

“its killed me! your gonna regret this, you and your bloody chicken”

omg the boggart lesson

“riddikulus!” “this class is ridiculous”

fuck snape!

draco really pushed someone with his bandaged arm

remus is such an amazing professor i love him and i just miss him so much

ugh harry in this hoodie?? amazing

remus and harry’s conversation with the music :(( lily :((

wtf is that eye painting??

percy screaming about being head boy,, bro stfu

sirius is such a dramatic little bitch i love it

seasonal changes marked by the wimping willow

“turn to page 394”

what a fucking rude ass bitch,, i hate snape

harry really be seeing the grim everywhere

i wish they had “wheres wood?” “trying to drown himself in the shower”

winter transition with hedwig! + clock tower

“come and join the big boys”

i just adore this scene of the twins giving harry the map (bro i really want a series about the marauders)

whos that skinny bitch with draco???

harry’s way too rash tbh

also mcgonagall being also too nonchalant about the whole marauder’s situation?? like those werent your students

remus is a soft boy dark academia icon

if only dumbledore wasnt a dumbass,, remus could have been uncle moony raising harry with sirius

ron’s nightmare scene?? iconic

“my dad didnt strut. nor do i” umm james potter was also a drama queen sooo probably strutting

“you, YOU FOUL LOATHSOME EVIL LITTLE COCKROACH” “hermione no, he’s not worth it”

sirius’ dog form really looks like a rabid dog omfg

the part where hermione grabs harry while she’s on the wimping willow omfg

“only one will die tonight” YOU DRAMATIC BITCH UR NOT MAKING THIS BETTER

“finally the flesh reflects the madness within” “well you’d know all about the madness within, wouldn’t you remus?”

why the fuck is the shreaking shack is swaying in the wind??

QUARRELING LIKE AN OLD MARRIED COUPLE

why the fuck didnt they knock peter out?? like tf?? they’re actually dumb dumb there were so many ways for this to go right

this man really sent 2 13-year-olds on this dumbass mission

buckbeak really beat up remus,, “professor lupin’s having a really tough night”

harry’s a fucking psycho with this patronus bullshit,, i cant

can they stop screaming while flying on buckbeak?? someone might hear them

im still mad sirius didnt get his name cleared,, so much would’ve changed

“we did it” “did what? goodnight” i fucking hate dumbledore and his mindlessness omfg sometimes i wanna punch him in the face

fuck snape for outing remus as a werewolf,,, but also he really didnt have to resign. like istg wheres the marauder energy when it comes to defying everyone??

i wish the movies had went into the marauders’ history :(( its one of my favorite aspects of the series

#harry potter #harry potter movies #philosopher's stone #chamber of secrets #prisoner of azkaban #hermione granger #ronald weasley #remus lupin #sirius black #severus snape #albus dumbledore #minerva mcgonagall #movie marathon #notes #harry potter notes

[worldoftom]

hehe i love it!!!! im so invested in it!!! its different from what ive been seeing. i really like how its not a classic modern "we have to save the wolrd" plot thats been done a million times. i love the 19th century london plot twist and setting. and i didnt even realize harrison was playing a real life prince lmao i was like "oh orince leopold okay duh" and i also been enjoying the story behind sherlock and watson too. ngl i lowkey thought sherlock looked just like tom in cherry with the shaved head and scarf lmaaooo like i cannot unsee it. its just sooo good and i cannot wait to watch the finale tonight!

also i knew that linen guy was up to no good i was like like "i dont trust this guy hes too nice". and when leo and bea spent the night together and shes like "take off your shirt youre too pretty to be hiding your body" or something like that i was like "heck yeah eye candy" lol but then when she found out who he was my heart was breaking and when that blonde bitch tried to seduce him i was like "bitch hes taken" lol

Hehe so many emotions at the same time!!! I had pretty much the same reaction except I didn't see any resemblance with cherry 😂 it was refreshing to just see so many different people of different ages and backgrounds come together and not once did they tried to explain it within the plot!!!

#the irregulars spoilers #azara 💙 #muuts 🥰 #b answers

[grlfriends]

revolutionary girl utena review

ep 1-5

the plot is actually kinda different from what I thought ?? in my mind the plot was: utena was a girl in a princess school who each and every princess would be "conquered" (for a lack of better words rn) in a ceremonial duel by a prince who fancied them, maybe she didnt wanna wanna marry anyone or she liked Anthy already but anyway in my mind utena showed up in the ceremony with duel clothing and then, in a very brave tm like-scene, she would openly declare she refused to be conquered by anyone and tbh I'm not even sure how Anthy would come into the plot... but back into what actually happened in the episodes everything so far is very introductory and just showing what mechanics will be explored further down the line I think?? the op is really good too

also every boy so far reminds me so much of knights of the zodiac?? maybe it's just the design I guess...) and nanami can get these hands, jealousy is a disease and she's the sickest person on earth for all I know

dont ask me why bit I just feel like room of mirrors - gfriend has a very well fitting vibe for it but I'm not exactly sure why hm.... 🤔🤔

ep 6-12

ok so why does this school just have random animals around 😐 I could understand the horse but a bull and a kangaroo?? what ...

touga just says the most random dramatic things and then just casually says anyone who believes in friendship is a fool ?? the guy wouldnt last a day in the naruto universe tbh, he kinda irks me in some way but I'm not sure why so I'll live with this strange feeling for a while I guess

↳ okay so watching ep 10 made me especially kinda creeped out, I know I've watched only 10 eps so far but like can he fall downstairs and break a neck or something already ...

also haha what if I watched that bet on it fmv and gave myself a bunch of spoilers would that be funny or what 😍 this is why i cant have nice things yall.... hope my memory goes to shit when sleep so I dont remember about it this week while I finish it

I feel like the main thing on the episodes are parallels, one way or another I always feel like they're setting up parallels and giving me clues for a bigger picture and a deeper plot arc that is still to come and the bet on it fmv just made this impression stronger, also I wanna say it's done in a good way, one that is both mysterious (??) and "honey you've got a big storm coming" at the same time 🤔🤔 much to think about honestly

↳ just saw ep 11 and even though I already knew this was coming sooner or later it still felt like crap seeing utena lose to dick head, at the end of the episode when he says anthy was always just reflecting utena's own wishes for himemiya (in another way bc I dont remenber the exact words) it felt like 😐 bc yes I knew that (the way she was working her thoughts was simply a copy and paste of what utena was saying) at all time I kept those essays about anthy in my head, I dont think theyll be truly relatable to what I'm seeing rn but yeah anthy rights (even though I know you betray/cheat on utena down the line bc of the bet on it fmv but I'm sure you had your own motivation)

↳ saw ep 12 bc I just couldnt handle being in a cliffhanger and yeah it happened what I absolutely thought it would lmao not that it was that difficult to foresee but yeah, I kinda liked how utena did it for her instead of being like "oh I wanna save anthy from touga" and treating her like a damsel in distress (I know that's kinda her position as the rose bride for what I've been told so far and that this is a subject spoken about in many many essays on tumblr but yeah) bc so far she's been treated as a trophy and a way to get something else, for the green haired guy it was a way to see something eternal, for miki it was a way to hold on into his "shining thing" and for touga it seems (so far) like a way to manipulate (just like he does with nanami) and just mark his position as above everyone else as he seems to view himself?? man I might be saying random stuff rn but it kinda does makes sense in my mind with the information I've had to this point

ep 13-25

honestly 😐😐 through 9 whole episodes I felt like they were trying to make the side characters deeper and show their hidden face and motivations but it felt so shallow...... not even actually shallow, just not deep enough that it would make me care about these characters and the fact there was no actual build to showing us why we're getting to know these characters backgrounds was just kinda meh too, didnt really help that all episodes had all the same formula and the same timing just for the developers made in those episodes be forgotten at the end and also just that pink haired guy could be like "ah failure again", it felt like watching the same episode over and over again, it was really tiring and like?? girl help I do not care about these characters at all, I feel like it could have been done well (like the keiko ep in comparison to the furuba chapter that deals with the yuki appreciation (??) club president graduating.... the way this ep was done and setup didn't really bring me any emotions) overall not to my taste and tbh I feel like I could have skipped all those episodes except for maybe the miki and juri one so 😑

all nanami focused episodes are the worst so far, she's so boring and I cant stand now annoying she is, the diary episode?? the cow episode?? the episode when tsuwabiki fuels with utena?? honestly I know they're trying to show me a better and different side of her but it just doesnt!! work!! bc i feel no sympathy for her, my biggest wish rn is her and touga just disappearing and no more filler episodes🗣🗣

I thought akio was utena's prince?? but apparently he's just anthy's brother and like.. I'm do done with his little talks with utena and yadda yadda, I just wanna see their duel is that too much to ask I'm dying over here (if this lenga lenga continues until ep 25 i will be so mad bc why were so many episodes wasted on such boring and and not necessary side characters backstories?? idc about them at all man aaaaaaaaaa)

↳ ep 25 was good finally we got what we deserve boys 😭😭😭😭😭 can utena just beat up akio already I'm tired of his ass, he exhales both "I'm a feminist I even take women studies classes #herstory" and "if she breathes she's a thot" energy also he has 0 style that mullet is simply horrible I bet there's a hairstylist community who considers him a criminal bc like 😐 it is simply so bad (q bit less when it's tied up but when it's all lose jesus Christ)

also touga thinks he's suuuuch a genius, sooo smart like king, I do not care about you at all can you shut the fuck up please and can we tall about the pink haired guy episode?? wack. honestly thought it would be more emotional or something, I binge watched 12 episodes with his ugly haircut face and did not even feel a thing he can choke I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ANTHY TAKING A SWORD OUT OF UTENA'S CHEST??? OSCAR WORTHY KINGS❗❗❗and then her lame ass brother being like "oh ho ho idk idk" shut up no one cares no one cares I swear to you no one cares shut uuuuup

ep 25-39

first of all, ep 25 was good but kinda reminded me of the nine episodes (13 until 21) where absolutely nothing interesting happened so I hope I'm wrong also can I just say just seeing the preview of the next episode made me roll my eyes so bad I almsot saw my brain?? bc yeah I'm fucking tired of nanami fosuced episodes she's so annoying oh my god nobody cares about a goddamn egg and much less one coming from her let her die or something pls she's so annoying there's nothing I've learned about her that was not against my own will I'm basically rotting over here 🤒

↳ ep 30 has me thinking Akio has a foot fetish or something 😐 bruh leave utena aloooooone I already know your plans and schemes you're not fooling anyone that's embarrassing for u and also... utena you're not very bright are you.... you start seeing every duelist you face with the same exact car and then when you see akio has the same car you didnt even stop to think about it that 1+1 equals 2 ... girl help yourself 😐

↳ yet again another nanami focused ep 😐😐😐😐😐 even though I do understand her better now I still don't find her particularly enjoyable to watch, call me a woman hater but like. idk she's still a bit annoying to me (but touga is straight up evil and is manipulating her so I feel bad for feeling like that tho.....)

↳ ok last 2 eps to go but listen. I thought the akio duel would have happened much sooner, maybe on ep 33 max but well didn't this age well lmao ngl, it did seem a bit too slow paced for my personal taste but also I feel like there's a certain level of drama that comes with slowing the pace down....

↳ aaaaaa yall I'm kinda 😢😭 over the ending omg........... even though it took the best of me to keep going in some parts I still enjoyed the ending aaaaa I thought i wouldnt really like it bc I just usually dont enjoy this type of ending but stil 😢😢😢😢 wait for me utena 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 girl I cried and then anthy walking in the end god utena and anthy holding hands 😭😭😭😭 akio can suck my dick

there's obviously many things I've missed or that I kinda didnt really pay attendance to so please dont take this serious, I was just writing as I watched the episodes so it's more like a thought compilation than anything, still I can see why there's many essays written about it and why it is held as a masterpiece by so many people

#g.txt

[millennialzadr]

WHY I LOVE ZADR!!!

HEY GUYS WHASSUP? LMAO

So this is a whole ass giant long post of me absolutely spewing my feelings of love for ZADR, it was the very first thing I wrote when I made this blog and I think it’s a nice, positive thing for my fellow shippers to inhale and enjoy 👌👌

it was originally a reply to mitarashiart’s post about why HE loves ZADR (link in replies) but I decided to delete that and make my own post since MY WHOLE ENTIRE TEXT WALL WAS SHOWN IN THE REPLIES and drowned out anyone else who was trying to talk (thanks tumblr mobile u fuckin idiot)

I had also posted a summary of an AU that I’m working on in the original post, but decided to remove it since it just about doubled the length (I’m thinking about posting it separately along with the wips I’ve been putting together, we’ll see 👀)

But ANYWAY, here is about a million reasons why I think ZADR is the fucking best, so if you like reading gushy gay ship feelings, please enjoy ❤️❤️❤️

[Posted June 2019][WARNING, LONG ASS THOUGHT BARF]

SOOO, holy hell y’all my journey back into this fandom has been a wild and unique experience for me, i went from adding invader zim to my bookmarks on kisscartoon, rewatching the series, finding out theres a movie coming out, finding out there was a shitload of content i’d never seen before (commentaries, lost episode scripts and audios, panels, the COMIC, episodes i’d never seen because the dvd i used to watch was scratched!! and a FUCKLOAD of quality modern fan art like oh my GOD) and finally curiously googling ‘zadr’ (which i was way into when i was maybeee 13/14) to see if there was any interesting new art, and holy hell, mita (the artist above) singlehandedly THREW me down the hole into modern zadr hell, first with his absolutely stunning IZ art (all his art is dope tho check him out yo), then reading the above explanation put the final nail in the coffin like, 100%

so i wanted to add onto his post here on why this ship got me so fucked up, both for anyone who might be wondering why on earth i’m shipping two characters from a kid’s show (i’m very aware how weird that is at first glance trust me) and also so i can get some ideas down for possible future reference (will i ever draw them? maybe)

(first of all, a disclaimer, and this is not pleasant to write but it’s important to address for clarity’s sake: I have no interest in romantic or sexual relationships between minors, and do not ship zim and dib as they are presented canonically in the show (as children). what i’m interested in is the conceptualized relationship they may have as modern adults, and i view zadr more as taking the concepts of existing characters and experimenting with them with different interpretations, which i personally think is a constructive and fun creative outlet, especially if these characters hold personal significance for you (childhood faves of course). growing up together is an important facet of their relationship, and certainly they were important to each other even as children (see: mopiness of doom) but as an adult i’m personally curious about what kind of adults they might’ve become, and that’s the focus of my interest. i’ll still be reblogging regular IZ art because it’s dope but if you see shippy looking art of them as tiny lil beans its either friendship or chibis (and i personally headcanon zim as getting taller with dib but some people stick with his canonical height when drawing them as adults, which is super short. it still doesn’t mean he’s a kid). aaand i wish i didnt have to write this and it would just be obvious but we live in a sick sad world and it is sourced from a children’s cartoon so i feel its necessary. end of disclaimer)

NOW THAT THAT’S OUT OF THE WAY

- ok, first reason’s a bit obvious - the nostalgia. holy hell, the feeling of rediscovering a ship that was popular when i was a preteen during the mid 2000s and discovering a totally new perspective on it as an adult comes with an almost totally overwhelming sense of nostalgia and comfort, as well as inspiration!! the kind of art that seems so common for zadr, these sketch pages of scenes and expressions and visual gags where artists would just scribble every idea they had and LOVE doing it, this was exactly the kind of art that made me so passionate about drawing as a kid, and it still sparks such a powerful feeling of love and admiration for me to this day. fan content of iz and zadr is simultaneously achingly familiar and totally new and fascinating, and it just makes me SO damn happy to consume, it is most definitely my new comfort content. and just, GOD. THE ART!! SO GOOD. FUCK

- now for the characters themselves: for some reason i just really love the thought of a mid twenties, modern Dib?? lanky goth dork, disaster bi, depressed as shit, uses bad sweaters and memes to cope?? when i was a kid i didn’t even LIKE Dib, but now i totally sympathize with him! he’s just a hyper obsessive nerd wishing there was more to life than the situation he got stuck with, how wildly relatable. he was a pretty big asshole as a kid (even to people besides zim) but he was also totally isolated and constantly bullied, so there’s a lot of room for growth. i feel there’s a lot of juicy character development potential for that boy, and there’s always been a special place in my heart for characters who are totally sad and screwed and hopeless, but there’s one thing, or person, that means the world to them and could possibly save them…

- aliens. Zim. i love nonhuman characters, i love monsters, i love aliens, i love characters that don’t understand human shit (and thus have much less room for shame or fear bc theyre just totally oblivious the negatives of modern society) and need guidance (bonding!!) from their human. i also love morally grey characters and characters with skewed logic, they’re always really interesting, and Zim himself just has such a unique personality and set of mannerisms, he contradicts himself a lot and you can never quite expect how he’ll behave, and i love that in a character, it makes them super versatile and fun, especially since there’s so many different possibilities for their development. Also, Zim is a gremlin, a little shit, and a disaster. I also love those traits in a character. And don’t even get me started on his character design?? big sparkly eyes? expressive antennae? monster teeth? complimenting colors? he’s adorable.

- mutual obsession. for someone like Dib, who seems almost repulsed by how boring and slow the people around him are, Zim quite literally personifies Dib’s  escapist fantasies, both as an inhuman entity from beyond the stars, and as a person who’s knowledge, charisma and mystery far exceeds that of anyone Dib has met in his entire life. (so basically what i’m saying is that for a shunned, jaded misanthropist, an actual alien is terribly alluring, even if said alien is dangerous, stupid, and possibly insane). not to mention Zim vindicates Dib’s entire life passion, the supernatural! Even when their relationship is totally negative, there is not a single inch of room for Dib to get tired of Zim. as mita explained, they validate each other. for Zim, WHO AGAIN, IS TOTALLY SHUNNED, ISOLATED, AND HATED BY EVERYONE HE KNOWS, Dib is the only person in the universe who gives a single shit about him!! he gives Zim credit as a threat, a capable invader, which if you ask me is the sole thing Zim is after (he’s hellbent on his mission because it would win him the approval of the tallest, all he’s ever wanted is recognition from the people he thinks so highly of). He literally gets depressed when Dib isn’t around to pay attention to him, not even the tallest were enough to motivate him before Dib came back. these two have no one and nothing without each other, and while lifelong nemeses is fine and dandy, i personally prefer friendship, affection and love, cause i’m a softie like that. how could they possibly get there after years of actively trying to kill each other?? well, i think under just the right circumstances it could become a possibility after a long, long time.

- growth. i. love. me. some. good. character growth. especially for characters with trauma/mental illness, bc again, relatable. these boys have issues, and as mita mentioned, their canon stories are actually INCREDIBLY sad! but the happy thought is, they could recover! they could help each other recover, for little reason other than the two are the only source of happiness for each other. now of course this also opens the gate for angst lovers, but at the same time offers potential for comforting, uplifting content of the boys supporting and inspiring each other, maybe even to the point of becoming happy and healthy enough to create the lives they want for themselves (as in appreciating life and doing things that make them actually happy instead of the delusions of grandeur they both sought when they were younger). gimme that positive shit and let the poor beans be happy  щ(ಠ益ಠщ)

- LITTLE THINGS. LITTLE THINGS THAT ONLY COME WITH CHILDHOOD FRIENDS. WITH HUMAN/NONHUMAN. WITH THE SHOW’S WEIRD LOGIC. Zim being the person Dib knows best and vice versa. Zim having an involuntary respect/admiration for Dib because he’s tall. Learning each other’s needs, limits, and communication methods, both emotionally and biologically. Sensitive antennae. Affectionate bickering. Being less insecure bc your partner literally has no idea why you see your flaws as flaws. Laughing at the flaws they do notice because they make no sense. Zim only wanting to eat waffles and chow mein. Dib being forced to overcome his depression lethargy and stay hygienic/keep the apartment clean because Zim has a sharper sense of smell and is afraid of germs. Endless conversation about anything and everything because they’re from literally different worlds, and endless intrigue. TOUCHING. TALKING. DOING EVERYTHING LIKE ITS THE VERY FIRST TIME AND ALWAYS NEEDING THE OTHER TO GUIDE THEM. HOLY HELL THERE IS SO MUCH POSSIBILITY FOR TINY LITTLE MOMENTS THAT MEAN THE WORLD. FUCK. GOT ME FUCKED UP.

so that wraps up the why. fuck man. its just such a good ship. if you read this big ass text post, thank you for indulging me, i hope you enjoyed it! because i enjoy it very much 👀 so stick around if you’d like to for a shit load of IZ and zadr content on this blog, possibly (MAYBE) even from me!! come roll around in alien hell with me why dontcha ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ its a fun time! thanks for reading!!!

-

SO THAT’S MY MANIFESTO Y’ALL, FEEL FREE TO REPLY WITH YOUR OWN REASONS!! I WOULD LOVE FOR THIS POST TO JUST BECOME A BIG GIANT PILE OF LOVE AND YELLING!! GO NUTS! SCREAM ABOUT IT! INFODUMP! DO WHATEVER YOU WANT! I’LL READ EVERY LAST REPLY! Y’ALL DESERVE TO ENJOY YOUR SHIP BC IT’S LITERALLY THE FUCKING BEST!!! LOVE Y’ALL!!!!!!

#in this trying time of shippers being stressed over discourse #i offer a gift<3 because i love you guys #and we should spread the love #i want yall to go OFF #tell me every little fuckin thing about zadr that makes ur heart doki OK #LETS GO 👏👏👏 #invader zim #zadr #text post #my post #long post

[tfw-no-tennis]

tf liveblog 1

sooo welcome to my latest liveblog, i love talking so i decided to liveblog my re-read of the transformers comics, specifically mtmte/ll. so, here goes!

starting out today w/death of optimus prime...i read mtmte/ll about 2 yrs ago, and i almost immediately re-read it, this time w/ruth...the first time i read it i missed a LOT, and reading it again really helped me actually understand what was happening lmao. so this’ll be my 3rd time reading it overall! so SPOILER WARNING for anyone reading this, i have read the whole series and will be referencing stuff that happens in future issues (tho i doubt anyone will read these, which is completely fine lmao, i love hearing my own thoughts so these are for me first and foremost) 

on we go!

omg i forgot how dramatic this is. ok lets do it, monologue time

‘afterspark’...i love transformers words lmao

hvbhdjfsdf optimus being like ‘I'm still alive it seems...bummer’

gps meaning ‘galactic positioning system’ vbajkhfdsk again, love the terminology 

optimus rlly just went on the biggest bender of all time and then wandered into a city like ‘where the fuck am i. this is the future right?’ lmao bro

WHIRL!!!!!!! i forgot he showed up this early

RODIMUSSSS my fucking boi

and bumblebee and wheeljack! i remember first reading this and recognizing basically nobody aside from optimus lmao

ooooh is that cyclonus i see in the bg of rodimus’s mini flashback explanation?? MY MANNNN 

also i have no idea what they're talking abt vhbhadjskhfjsf I'm w/ya there optimus....i never read anything other than mtmte/ll so i really am not filled in on any of the other lore

ultra magnus arresting swindle in the bg lmao

i love the fact that there were all these like, refugee cybertronians all around the galaxy who didn't want any involvement w/the war for a variety of reasons...like, that makes so much sense!!! love it

god i love the politics in this world. its all so nuanced and interesting and grey, bc everyone’s side has Some logic to it

‘the decepticon pen’ vbhsdfhsajbfk i cant why did they call it that

oh god i almost forgot they threw poor cyclonus in there. let him live

[sees soundwave] <3<3<3

perceptor and rewind!!!!!!! 

rewind...so tiny and smart...love him

TRAPPED LIGHT....aughhhhh i love all the mfing FORSHADOWING stuff

THE MATRIX IS A MAP YEAH BABEYYY

the optimus prime effigy omfg

drift!!!!

also the fact that the knights of cybertron supposedly left cybertron abt 10 million yrs ago...in the grand scheme of transformers that's not even that long ago tbh

also bee is so ufcking tiny oh my god

oh god prowl. #1 jackass 

i feel like rodimus only understands part of what's going on and is like. ok this politics stuff sucks lets DO something

bumblebee out here quoting hsm 

hvabjdfbsaf i remember the first time i read this i lichrally didn't know who any of these characters were and finally when someone said prowls name i was like THATS PROWL?????? lmao

like as a kid i watched tf animated and the bay movies so all my lore knowledge came from there. and well also transformers was my first foray into fanfiction so theres that too lmao

‘terrible things happen in war. terrible things happen in peace, as well’ LOVE IT

oh yeah those i/d chips sure are FUCKED UP jesus christ

magnus: yeah I'm down for a road trip actually. this place blows 

also I'm sure magnus knew that rodimus & drift’s party ship would last about 5 seconds without some sort of solid authority to prevent everyone from dying immediately, so

i rlly love the conflict between the autobots and the nails bc both sides have really valid points abt everything

oof optimus leaving cybertron bc he recognizes that he as a figure represents the war...bro

bee rlly is hardcore in this continuity 

optimus silently handing bee and rodimus a half of the matrix and stalking off...peak tired dad energy

optimus orion: fuckkkk yea i can finally do shit without my hundreds of kids bothering me for stuff. exile rules

so that's it for this issue!! ill probably try to keep these shorter and more coherent than my hxh liveblogs lmao. not sure if ill do quite as much meta here as I did there, since this isn't the first time I'm reading this 

anyways, great start to a great series, i love the post-war setup SO MUCH, especially since so many other pieces of transformers media takes place during or before the war

and like, this feels pretty earned (at least to me) bc there WAS a bunch of comic stuff from the war period (not that i read any of it...)

god i wish idw didnt reboot the tf comics. there's so much more they could've done w/the post-war setting ugh

anyways, great start, cant wait to reread more!

#lj rereads mtmte #new tag hell yeaaaaaa baby #im probs not gonna put this in my regular tf tag bc i dont wanna clutter it lmao

[yuukei-yikes]

lost day hour should’ve been the end of kagepro babey

what is UP it's 2019 i am NOT ONLY talking about kagepro but im also gonna talk about a comic that came out like over half a year ago. Yeah

i've just been having too many feelings about it and it's my blog and i get to post whatever i want SO:

the lost day hour comic really was what would've been the perfect end to kagepro. like, kagepro in its entirety!!! songs, anime, novels. the comic just being THE ending.

haruka was the protagonist. in the songs, the "last" one (at least chronologically in universe) was from his point of view, but despite that the novels and anime did him dirty and never gave him his screen time, even outside of str. i mean even str isn't actually about him lol. haruka was never important enough, he's just the devise to make konoha tragic. but this time, it's post/during str and he's here!!!! he's the protagonist of the story!!!!

all the members of the mekakushi dan feel SO in character and everything they say really feels like a good resolution to all of their arcs.

kido speaks of family. she's really THE family character, not ayano. she makes sure to be the next big sister after having lost TWO (2) of her own big sisters. kido is the character to have lost the most family members: first her biological mom, after having to kill her own father lol she loses rin, then her new mom ayaka and her new sister ayano, and then her new dad kenjirou. even like that, kido keeps it together. she's never the one breaking down. kido is essentially what makes the mekakushi dan what it is, because she takes ayano's game and turns it into something seto and kano can continue feeling that comfort in. she takes over to be the leader and their big sister. SO OF COURSE SHE SAYS THAT FRIENDS ARE HER FAMILY. 

kano says confusing stuff but that's just him and i. Love it. like when i read the comic and i was talking to my gf about it and the first thing i said was that i loved kano's bit and that he felt super in character and i still feel the same!!! he gets asked what a friend is and his answer is basically "whoever makes ME feel like im a friend" and really that's just The Most Kano.... and it's so rewarding to read his part because it feels like he's being super honest? like his expressions and stuff, he looks like. vulnerable or smth. especially when he says "i say good things sometimes" AHHH HIS FACE THERE!!! he's not acting at all!!!

seto and mary work in A FLOWER SHOP!!!! THIS IS CANON!!!! no more shitty part time jobs because they either got a job together or opened their own shop and this is. the best news ever. it's SUCH a cool thing to show. if this comic was the end, wouldn't it be cute to say "oh seto and mary open a flower shop together in endgame"? i love it. they're so important to each other's arc... mary basically starting to live her life after meeting seto, and seto becoming this!!! BRAVE BOY after meeting mary since he has someone to protect!! their answers are based on each other and ARE THE SAME which feels so appropriate ;_; they really did change for the better after meeting each other. they're one another's most important friend!

momo says friends are the most important thing because she spent her entire life by herself. no brother no dad and no mom. hibiya acts like she's exaggerating when she says that but tbh??? she really isn't. she was always alone! of course that now that she has friends, they're her entire world to her. hibiya meanwhile is like momo: he's still figuring out what a friend is! but he chooses to be more skeptical and looks at it from another angle, and rather than HELL YEAH MY FRIENDS ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT he's like "dammit harukas right wtf is a friend". but that's super cool because at the beginning hibiya didn't even want to be with the dan in this comic he specifically tells momo he just wouldn't be there if he didn't want to be friends

hiyori is. probably my least favorite thing of the comic. i absolutely adore her it's not that i dislike her at all!!! she just... appears for such a short moment, and based on her story and the fact that she's A REVIVED character, her answer doesn't really grab my attention. she's confusing and ??? um, i would've liked it better if her answer was somehow connected to konoha because she's still mourning him, and like isn't haruka the (in?)appropriate person to hear this? lol. but overall, if this comic had been the ending, it's still good to see hiyori made it back! 

ayano's bit really makes me want to cry because everything is perfect in it. she made it back. listen an ending where ayano doesn't come back does make sense because kagepro is about moving on and with ayano surviving shintaro's manpain makes NO sense lmao bUT HEY. SHE DESERVES IT. so she's back! and she's wearing that cute dress and she has her scarf! she's on the SWING SETS WITH HARUKA and i know that's such a silly detail but im so happy about it because it feels so right to have haruka and ayano's interaction be in a place like that KSNXKSKSK and aghhhh how she asks the question back to haruka!!!!! that's so cool lmao and it's so in character ;; but also her answer is sooo fitting, she even says "the current me" like acknowledging she's not the same she was before. since she's a chara with mental illness that's nice to hear... and another cool detail is that we see her drinking soda with shintaro while they watch the others be silly SKDNSLDK like if this were the end, that's SUCH a nice detail to put since the comic doesn't require shintaro and ayano interaction at all, and both are important characters to the story and each other. so they're clearly hanging out and talking to each other so that's really good to know

shin and haruka are probably my favorite in this comic because their interaction is the most fitting thing considering their entire history together. like ever since their friendship was introduced in novel 6 it's been something important! shintaro and haruka really represent the side of friendship in kagepro because overall it's a story about family, and their relationship always represented this other angle of finding family in a best friend. in novel 6 haruka says that if shintaro isn't his friend by now then he doesn't NEED any friends. he's the reason haruka even realises he has feelings for takane, because it felt so right to call shintaro a friend but it felt off with her. neither haruka or shintaro ever had friends because takane and ayano are their love interests, so it's their first genuine platonic relationship ever. and they just continue appreciating that always! even in their interaction in the comic shin expresses that he's still not sure what a friend is, but if haruka is one he just wants to keep it that way. so their talk in the comic is fitting and it's super nice to see shintaro gets to reunite with his best friend.

ok and........takane...... everything about takane in the comic is good. she is SO cheerful. all of you DUMBASSES who "hate" ene but "love" takane can die mad about it now because newsflash ene IS takane. if you hate ene then you dislike takane when she begins her character development. it means you hate endgame takane. it means you hate the happy takane in lost day hour!!! she has come SO far. she smiles so much and encourages haruka when he was overthinking and didn't know what to draw. she just tells him the answer is easy and friendship is the mekakushi dan. SHE'S PERFECT have you seen how INCREDIBLY HAPPY SHE LOOKS?? no one else has this impact of character in the comic, everyone kind of acts the same in regards of attitude (except kano who looks v honest and over himself but still). in the fandom we always took it for granted that endgame takane is more cheerful than she was but lost day hour just. confirms it and it's done in the best way possible.

ok and of course im talking about harutaka too because 1) im biased and 2) harutaka IS the love story of kagepro and that's not bc im biased anymore, it just is. and it never had a good resolution... until this!!!!

haruka asks everyone what a friend is but doesn't ask takane. like really he didnt want to ask her in the first place because when shin asks who's left to ask harukas like "uHHHH one person but..." and like he doesn't just imply he wasn't going to ask her, but his interaction with her is soooo different from the ones he has with the dan earlier. with everyone else he just asks what a friend is but with takane he actually... doesn't? wh. why wouldn't he ask her im just. ok.

haruka in the beginning tells kido to think of it as an interview and essentially that's the feeling there is in each interaction but with takane it's different. he's not interviewing her. 

she shows up and sits next to him while he's trying to draw. they talk about WHY he's asking and about what he wants to do with his future. during the entire comic haruka is normal and friendly, and doesn't really act any differently, but with takane he seems a lot less formal and does things like allow himself to talk or get embarrassed when she immediately figures out he heard too much and didn't know what to draw.

their love story was always just left there as this tragic thing and as a fandom we always wanted their tearful reunion in the ending, but this is better. we finally know they actually do reunite. we always knew because in str takane is running towards him but this is... an actual interaction we're seeing 

they didn't only reunite, but we get to see they still have a close and comfortable relationship with one another. out of everyone haruka speaks with, takane is special. when his face appears for the first time in the comic it's a smile for her

and um, it may be because it's my otp and i've been waiting for this str content for YEARS and you know harutaka is my lifeblood 😩😩😩 but i believe it's already established to be more than a friendship at that point. i mean haruka wasn't going to ask her so jUSt saying man im not saying they're a established couple there im SAYING i think they're Something. i mean like haruka always said in novel 6, it felt weird to put takane in the friend category so in str it's the same, just very Obvious

BUT that's exactly why it'd be a good ending. it's up to interpretation. little things like that ARE fun and good to simply allow them to be heavily implied. just like with their jobs. because okay haruka wants to be an artist, hell yeah that's a cool thing to have as canon. BUT i think it's cool that just one character gets a canon detail of his future, the one who represents what growing up means. HARUKA of all characters, the one who for a long time thought he wasn't even gonna have the chance to grow up, which is why it's incredibly fitting that he's the one to represent this.

kagepro might be a mess and just a pain to be a fan of, but it's really a heartwarming and wonderful story about friends, family and love. this comic covers all of that. while they're answering this question, it's a good way to say bye to the characters individually.... and i mean. the comic's ending is literally the most perfect thing ever for a close, with the ENTIRE mekakushi dan having fun together and finally being happy and complete.

of course it's jin's series. they're his characters. we all understand and respect that, and if he wants to make kagepro never end like he claims then so be it but personally!!! it makes me really upset that it's gonna go on

anyway. that's it bye gamers

#kagepro #kagerou project #shut up val #long post #:pensive: #rants

[tellmesomethinggg]

****

linking this here bc it was technically a journal? i just don’t want it on my notes anymore and if i ever (likely not to) want to re-read for whatever reason. please note that i knew people would read this so things are censored and are the basic version. also there was a switch at one point from **** to chris because i didn’t want things to be read

(for later when i got time lmao)

Matt is a piece of shit that just wants to fuck -Chloe

well fuck

here goes nothing

the plan: don’t get drunk bc i got shit to do early next morning and ill tell him tomorrow when i do get drunk. spoiler alert that didn’t work

Gaby (coles gf) came too btw

so i had a smirnoff ice and said no more than two shots after so id be buzzed but not fully drunk (i ended up having three and was very much drunk)

me jon and gaby we’re talking about guys and i mentioned something about liking a guy or some shit and gaby looks at matt and then me and confirms it with me. then she tells me that apparently when she met me and a few other friends at the beach last quarter, that she predicted the two of us would end up together and told cole this. im like wtf how and she claims she’s psychic lol

later, Matt and i are on the sack and he looks at me and goes do you like me and im thinking well fuck so i say yes and he’s like well shit sorry but (and then i forgot exactly what he said) something along the lines of it’s not mutual or it’s not the right timing (i forgot okay) and then he gets up after a bit to go to the bathroom (I’m pretty sure cole went out too) and then me gaby and Jon have a chisme session and they think that he does like me but whatever

so the guys come back and at this point i really need to pee again so matt offers to take me and we start talking and he’s all, oh im sorry if i led you on and shit and im like it’s alright ill get over it, it just might be a bit awkward for me for a bit. but then on our way back from the bathroom he asks me , do you wanna at least kiss your crush at least one time and im like uhh yeah so he kisses me and then we start talking but i forgot about what and im kinda dizzy so he says, oh let’s sit on the couches for a bit before we go back, so we do and somehow we kiss again and then start making out

and at this point im like bitch there’s no way you don’t like me like why would you do that if you didn’t

so we finally go back and it’s been some time so the rest of em are obviously curious

matt goes with cole to the bathroom again and the three of us have a chisme session otra vez and they’re like yeah he fucking likes you he’s prob just scared bc of his last relationship

cole comes back in and basically backs up their side based on his convo he just had with matt

and so it’s decided that we’ll both sleep on the sack, Jon sleeps on his bed and the other two together in coles bed

he comes back and we all “go to sleep” but I push for him to hold me like he usually does whenever we sleep together and around like 2,3 am we both start making out again and just like uhhhh

also we’re both very much drunk but of course i tend to remember things whenever ive gotten drunk, however, he did not and so now we gotta talk and figure shit out and go from there

also im not telling Emilou or Hanna yet until we figure things out so

yeah

fuck

alrighty, so after last night, ive decided to do absolutely nothing about it and decided to just let things play out the way things do. i don’t wanna say something and ruin our friendship that we have bc i trust him a lot and like hanging out with him, so, i guess the end of this note for now, unless the situation changes anytime soon

Can Tim see what I write on this?     -Chloe

Yes -Janet

Hi Tim!

-Chloe

Tim pls respond.

-Chloe

Hi Chloe! Sorry I have been busy at home LOL

He responded I’m so happy!

-Chloe

FYI im just going to add things at the top of the note so that its easiwr to see stuff when i add it bc then otherwise youd have to scroll a ton

and I’m dating shit so i know when I wrote stuff and my memory and yeahhh

FEB 15 1 pm

chillin in alp so lets get this chisme

alrighty so last night i stayed the night in pratts but it wasnt just me so calmate, it was me and jon bc long story short i was too lazy/dizzy to get up and jons roommate had her bf over. basically we both shared the bed, not a lot of physical contact but whateva

brb

anyways, there was also one point where he was watching a movie from his childhood and idk what tf it was but he was shocked that i havent seen those movies, so apparently now im gonna watch them so i told him for payback we gotta watch disney movies lmao

oh also! i fucking got back to my room and took a shower to get ready for class, and when hanna gets back from class shes all like oh you slept in HiS rOoM huh and i was like uhhh yeah and told her the truth like i was too lazy and dizzy to get up and then she didnt really say anything but uhhhh yikes

and then i mentioned this to emilou later when we were walking to class and shes like yeah idk why she did that that was weird and i was thinking like thank God she doesnt think the same as hanna bc shes also slept in his room on the bean bag a few times

FEB 14 2pm

heyyy its valentines day and guess whos still single and workinggg

so uhhh last night, around 1, both me and pratt finished our shit (hw and studying) and im wide awake so im like hey, brooklyn 99? (because i got him into the show and i love rewatching the show bc its sooo good) and hes down so we start watching in his room. were both on his bed but were sitting (for the tie being) and eventually i decide to lay down and use one of his pillows but its the flat pillow so i attempt to steal his other one, which he protests and we lowkey wrestle over it and eventually i fail ugh and i fall over in frustration and land my head on his knee and then just quit and stay there, but get this, he just deals with it and lays on top of me, like his head is on my side. granted we both also have pillows so like his pillow is in between me and him and same for me but like ughhh

and eventually i fall asleep for like an episode (?) and wake up right before 3 am, and then decide hey sleep sounds important bc i have an 8 am and so does he, so i sit up but im too lazy to get up right away so i sit and go through twitter and shit so chris just lays down with his head on my leg and i set my arm down on his chest and he falls asleep for a few minutes and then i finish going through my social media and every part of me doesnt wanna move, but im also in a position that would be uncomfortable to fall asleep in so i wake him up and then go back to my room

oh and the other thing i forgot was that for a good couple hours we were texting and joking around and yeahhh

i feel like im reading a lot into what happens but at the same time, like i doubt id be this comfortable doing shit with guys like this and idk about him, but like sometimes i wonder you know?

also, saturday night, as far as i know, its just me and him going to the basketball game bc idk who else is going (eye emoji insert here bc im on my computer lmao) so we'll see what happens

FEB 10 11am

okay soooo last night,

the plan was to get buzzed, just me and matt and watch Brooklyn 9-9 but then Anthony and emilou joined us so never mind. after a bit, Anthony leaves so he can answer a phone call and pratt offers me shot #1 and not emilou (she’s laying on the bean bag, I’m on his roommates bed chillin behind her so she can’t see what’s up)

we take two and im slightly buzzed but i think “hey lets see how much we can take before she notices” and he’s down so uhhh let’s get this

later we have to include Anthony and he’s down to see how much we can take and he just lets us continue, i get to 4 shots and he finishes the bottle so i can’t have a 5th

brb im gonna go eat with him

okay im back now...

anyways were both pretty out of it, emilou still hasnt noticed and anthony finds this all funny i assume and so do i , and eventually she finds out and then the two of them leave i guess around 2 am and the two of us are both on the bean bag and were both tired and drunk and drunk me like petting his hair and apparently holding his hand and well yeah i kinda hate drunk me bc if that wasnt obvious enough lmao :/

continuin, we basically end up cuddled together most of the night until we both kind of sober up hella early in the morning and kind of separate a bit

and so in the morning guess who brought it uppp and i at least have an excuse that i was drunk and not thinking and just kinda doing whatever drunk me wanted to do (but omggg his hair is so fucking nice to play with omg) anyways imma just die real quick bc idk what happens now

also since no one else was in the room literally no one else knows about this and i think were keeping it that way bc lets be honest if anyone found out about that i think id be screwed for secret keeping and then well yeah

FEB 8 1AM

i remembered:

sunday 2-3

i forgot this happened but before I ended up in chris’s room i was chillin upstairs watching tv and then he came out on the phone with some one and long story short he said something on the phone to his friend along the lines of “you’re gonna have me in your life for a long time” and when he was saying that i was looking at him bc soy chismosa and i was curious and he winked at me and I died

Monday 2-4

so the other thing that happened was I had lunch/dinner with him before my writing class and no recuerdo que decimos, but uhhhh yeah

i like hanging out with him

also, just got back from his room and am more convinced that he may not like me but actually just sees me as a friend but at the same time maybe he does but IDK

i hate feelings and it’d be so much easier if i didn’t have them sometimes lmaooo

FEB 7 5-7 PM

so im currently in the room rn so im gonna try to make this as chronological as possible

saturday 2-2

alrighty so mind you this is the day ive volunteered with ship and have spent the whole day there, (i dont remember why i thought this was relevant :/)

so saturday night, i go to work in his room around 8 (?) so i can work on my essay and finish my shit bc he has a bean bag thats hella comfy to work on

andd so later on, jocelyn comes in to watch anime with him and then after i finish we all decide to watch gabriel iglesias and ended up squishing together on the bean bag with me in the middle of the two of them

and so were all chillin there, laughing whatever and at one point chris fucking pratt puts his head on my shoulder for a little bit and i dIeDddd

and eventually i fall asleep when we start watching emperors new groove and mind you im fucking next to chris pratt like uhhhh my GOD

so i wake up once the movies over and then go to the bathroom and come back and by then he has taken over the whole bean bag and im sad that i cant just get back and go back to sleep so i go back to my room

(hanna doesnt know what time i get back i think and im pretty sure it was around4 am) (emilous also not here bc she went home for the weekend)

sunday 2-3

so i decide hey i was productive yesterday and decide to return to his room to work on shit and try to get as much done before work in theevening

i finish around 1/2? and then i tell him im bored and i wanna do something before work but idk what so he says lets go to the rec room and its just the two of us and its chillin and he puts me on his story playing pool lmao

and then i go to work :(

but then THEN later after work i go for a run and end up back in his room and theres a couple other people there and so were all chilling (mind you this is around midnight)

and somehow i end up falling asleep on the bean bag next to this girl jon from my hall and (this is a secret in a secret) but i hear her get up at one point and then chris pratt then joins me and during the night im tossing and turning and leaning on him a bit (ughhhh i died a shit ton)

monday 2-4

so in the morning around 720 or so i wake up pay dumb and am like oh whend you get here and he explains and then hes like yeah i dont really know the girl who slept in my bed (one of jons friends) and i figured since im more comfortable with you id just move here (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me upppp) [please note that when i say fuck me up i dont mean that type of fuck]

alrighty thats what i remember that i havent told you, and then the other bit from the screen record was tuesday and now its thursday and here i am in guess whos room again

possibly staying the night lmao

but jons also here so its not like im staying the night staying the night

[smireyac]

well well well wouldja lookie where we’re at now ⭐⭐

one more time around huh

lmao even got an hour till midnight again! its a talent at this point....

alright lets talk 2019

last year i said i wanted to make 2019 my year of DOING... bc 2016 was change, 2017 was getting used to and 2018 was getting too comfortable...

in all honesty, 2019 wasnt a bad year. in fact i have a lot to be proud of and celebrate! i think i accomplished a lot this year :^) as far as my goals that i made last year: 

-i wrote!! well not as much as i had APPARENTLY set for myself but a lot more than i thought i would!! so like my “goal” said 50k but like i almost immediately forgot about that and said my gaol was 10k [much more reasonable] which!! i did meet!! in fact i wrote 15,260 words of fun writing this year!! even if it was mostly brainstorming and i had said that didnt count... shut UP past me let me have this win!! i also said school work didnt count but if u *DO* count, i wrote an additional 13,165 words so :^p

-i went out!! not as much i woulda wanted but i went to 2 concerts and FINALLY (!!!!!!) got to see the book of mormon live on STAGE

-i made friends!!!!! ya kno i said 2019 should be the year of doing but really it was the year of friends, old and new... i hung out with joslyn at the fair b4 she moved branches... im a lot friendlier to the other peeps at the library.... and the peeps at the brig too!! even if im not there anymore

-oh yeah i quit working at the brig!! then came back for the summer lmao but i finally decided enough was enough 

-i got to see old friends!!!!! a lot of them!!! when i went back to miami for a week!! 

-wasn’t a goal i made for myself but i started playing dnd!!! and its been SOOO FUN!!!! 

as for the stuff i didn’t do, honestly im not even this surprised at this point but in 2020 we’re trying something different.. something new for the new decade 😎 were gonna be nicer... not just to other people, but to myself... shocking i know but like ive cursed and yelled at myself in every last one of these reflections and as you can see, its not super effective lmao

so lets get into the goals for the new year right? (i got like 7mins heh)

-we’re gonna keep “write” on here bc if u want to be a writer, u gotta write, right? lmao sooo how about we double the second goal? 20k words of fun writing for 2020!! you’ll beat that goal no problem, you were so close this year already!!

-i think saying “read more” was easy for me to ignore so if i make it a cool goal like “read 20 books in 2020″ then i might actually do it!! i was really gonna say 100 bc ve schwab does it but tbh its like last year when i said 50k words, its just not realistic so !! 20 seems reasonable bc i dont think ive ever even done *that* before....

-now.... drum roll please..... my most serious goal of 2020 is to.................. learn to drive!!! ta da!!!! i’ve been putting it off for whatever reason (i know the reason[s] but lets not get into it again) but i think i cant put it off anymore.... as much as i love public transportation (not sarcasm) and have no desire to know how to drive, i guess........ i can see why its a valuable skill or whatever............... so im gonna make an effort to learn this year.... like take the permit test and practice....... guhh... its the goal im least looking forward to but!! im gonna do it!!!

-now back to the kindness thing.... along with just being nicer to myself about the things i do, i also want to be nicer to myself about how i feel and how i look.... like i keep getting mad at myself for having feelings or not liking how i do something... i also want to be more ok about wearing clothes that fit tightly on my body... i want to be ok not hiding my fat and just exist in my body the way it already is.... while i was in miami, i wore a lot more revealing stuff and i just want to not think about how someone else might feel seeing my clothes cling to the softness of my body [i discovered your fat friend this year can you tell? lmao]

so yeah those are the main goals, honestly i have more but it doesn’t seem like the place for it and a lot of them are the same as every year anyway......

welp we’re 15mins into the new year and i want to rest so thats what im gonna do now :^)

thanks for listening

❤️

#omg i talk #happy new year