#an author who murders

[givehimthemedicine]

"I can't lose you" vs. "You're not going"

so many times that Mike expresses love for El or concern for her safety, he frames it on himself, and how losing her would impact him.

it's true that Mike's adolescence shouldn't have to be so heavily shaped by traumatic losses. it's true that El shouldn't be obligated to keep putting her life on the line. these two have this repeatedly clashing survivors guilt / hero complex thing going on that makes this all so complicated. I'm not painting a 13 year old boy as bad for not articulating a complex issue. this isn't an anti-Mike post.

what I'm focused on here isn't Mike's thought process but what El actually hears come out of his mouth, because that's all she has to go on.

and what she keeps hearing from him throughout the show is that his love for her, and wishes for her not to die, tend to sound motivated by fears about the emotional consequences for himself rather than concern for her wellbeing.

2x9. El, about to walk back into the building where she was imprisoned and abused all her life and use her powers to a potentially life threatening intensity with the burden of the literal world on her shoulders, has to spend her parting moment with Mike reassuring him that he won't experience loss.

3x6. El, for the first time in her life finally hears someone say they love her, and in the same breath the frame gets pulled back onto Mike's own fear of loss again, because again it's about her risking her life / using her powers. (not to mention, after it's all over and done without Mike having lost anyone, she tries to follow up on the I love you and he pretends he has no idea what she's even talking about)

4x9. El hears Mike elaborate on the "I can't lose you" concept at length while in doing so literally (ofc unintentionally) causing her to lose Max. his long awaited love declaration speech is focused mostly on himself rather than naming anything he loves about El beyond her abilities. which seems to be the moment it really clicks for El that this ain't it.

now consider El's response to Max's death.

there couldn't have been a more perfect opportunity to give her Mike's usual line, "I can't lose you!" but they didn't draw that parallel.

even in the privacy of the void, El doesn't speak on her own loss. her words are a direct response and reassurance to Max's last ("I don't wanna go, I'm not ready!" -> "You're not going"), even knowing she can't hear her for multiple reasons at this point. she listened to Max. she doesn't make it about herself. her concern is framed solely on Max.

#character analysis #eleven #mike wheeler #didn't really mean this as an elmax post either #just as a look how the way el gets treated informs the way she treats others post #it's complicated because am I annoyed at mike for not listening to El and trusting her as the authority on her own powers? yes #is el also an abused child with a hero complex who doesn't know any better than to throw her own life at the problem and #perhaps mike indeed has a point that she should be stopped from doing that even if she's genuinely willing? also yes #do I know that someone going off to battle is a different situation than someone who's been straight up murdered? yes again #mine #analysis

[captainofthetidesbreath]

Midst is about a murder the exact same way that Disco Elysium and Pentiment are about a murder.

#They're about murder but also about ideology and authority systems and maybe trying to do what's right when there's little space to. #(And how extremely wrong that can go because of the weight of institutions and ideologies and history itself on everyone and everything) #It's about what you're told and who is telling you. About change and potential second chances. #About communities and societies and how we build them (for better and for worse) and what it is we owe and give and take from one another. #About realizing you can feel the world turning right here and right now. About change and its conditions. #Midst things #Midst #Midst podcast #Disco Elysium #Pentiment

[impostorsshow]

Going insane over yhs grian and time travel I've had a daydream for like a year now about the mcc hosting a special event where each team has a younger version of a previous event winner and the MCC deages and hosts a bunch of teens and young adults for a week to y'know make sure a deaged winner isnt too stressed out. And grian is the only winner on his team and although it would be okay to request to be put on a different team, grian assumes he can bullshit his way through whatever time period and that it'd probably pull from when he was on EVO and it wouldn't be an issue but instead it's yhs like a week after taurtis got hit by a car so he's an absolute mess that has been tortured by Sam and you do not have to be around that man much to be traumatized.

Grian is disqualified as soon as they find out he came from a permadeath world, much less had a panic attack over seeing smajor fall from a high place and they call in someone to replace him but it's too late now they have to babysit grian and like 4 other competitors that were just At the Wrong Time. essentially this would just pull from whatever knowledge I have but i am doing a binge of the series with a friend to reset my memory. Mostly, some key moments of this would go as follows [etophobia warning for the next part, or whatever it is the vomit fear thing EDIT CANNABALISM MENTIONED FUCK HOW DID I FORGET THAT]:

Grian covered his mouth, gagging and exiting the room as quickly as he could, turning down the hallway into a darker room and ducking over the trash bin, retching. He heard a sound to his left, and realized whatever room he had sprinted into had Lizzie and Joel in it [idfk], and god throwing up next to two adults was embarrassing. "Sorry."

"Grian! Are you alright? What happened?" Lizzie grabbed a convenient towel and offered it to the younger man, who took it and gratefully wiped his mouth. "Well, uh. Someone brought beef jerky as a gift for everyone and I couldn't stand the smell."

Lizzie and Joel glanced between each other, before Joel asked. "And what's with beef jerky? Are you really that picky of an eater?"

"uh." Apparently the light teasing was either not picked up or directly ignored by Grian, who just stayed quiet for a moment before covering his mouth with the cloth, only barely removing it to speak. "You wouldn't like beef jerky if... someone used it to ..trick you into eating your girlfriend-" and Grian turned and threw up again, hovering over the bin in the silence he created in the room because god that was a gross thought and stop thinking about it your gonna throw up again- Grian threw up again. He was going to need some water after this.

------------------------------

"Grian, how experienced are you with death? You seem to come from a pretty sheltered homeworld." Gem was walking with Grian, along with Etho to one of the training maps they wanted to show the younger. Something about jumping and swimming?

Grian smiled grimly, trying his best to ignore the thoughts that came up. "Uh, yeah. Very experienced, I wouldn't call my home sheltered in the slightest, it was incredibly dangerous. At least, high school was."

Gem grinned, patting Grains shoulder and Grain tried his best to suppress the shiver that came at the unexpected contact, much less from someone he barely knew. Grian wished he had his best friend here, but he was

"-die alot here." Grian caught the end of Gems sentence, blinking. "Huh? What about death?"

"oh, sorry, I was just saying you'll probably die alot here. It's really easy to fall off of Ace Races map."

"...uh, how far of a fall is it?"

"oh, it's not to the void, don't worry, theres a kill box down there far before you reach the void, don't worry."

"....okay." Grian didn't like the sound of falling, and with how casual Gem was being it couldn't mean actual death. But as far as he had learned from Japan, people would stab each other for fun, and getting a broken leg from a fall did Not sound fun. He would just have to take his time, even if it meant upsetting Sam the people who were teaching him how to compete. Why would the future version of himself risk dying after everything, anyway?

-----------------------------

And other iconic moments such as "Grain is Incredibly Aggressive at Rabbits and Also Deathly Afraid of Them And No One Knows What to Do About It" and "That One Trauma dump about Taurtis Getting Stabbed, Getting Into A Car Accident, And Essentially Dying That Every YHS Fanfic Has" I don't know why I'm advertising it it's just a daydream I can't write because I wouldn't be able to write a good enough variety of characters for MCC of all things

#tw emetophobia #cw emetophobia #istg everything tagged with yhs has to have a vomit tag with it #its a passage of rite into making a yhs post #yhs grian #yhs #grian #talk talks #kinda gross #im aware throwing up is gross hell i avoid things tagged emetophobia but like. yhs people know ya know #its just an integral part of writing yhs grian the way he gets treated in that show is fucking horrid #hell how everyone gets treated by sam and by the adults and authorities in the show is horrid you can tell how bad the person who made it i #oh yeah obligatory fuck samgladiator tag hes a shit person in yhs and in real life!! aside from murder yhs is just a self insert #I DROGOT THE FUCKING CANNABALISM TAG IM A FAILURE #cw cannibalism

[winepresswrath]

MXTX MC conflicts go:

Yi City: my boyfriend thinks I am a prolific murderer and specifically murdered a bunch of people his bff loves to get back at him. also that I tricked him into doing murders with me, for enrichment. I did all those things but did not anticipate having a feeling about his feelings.

Scum Villain: my boyfriend thinks I want to kill him but I don't.

MDZS: my boyfriend thinks I hate him but I don't.

TGCF: my boyfriend doesn't know I exist but I'm worried that once he finds out he's going to find my eyepatch ugly and my cavern of effigies offputting.

#it may be unfair to pull yi city #out of its published context #arguably it should be sitting at the doomed subplot table with Beefleaf and Qijiu #but I think it's more fun to treat it like juvenalia and this is my shitpost #and anyway it basically depends whether you decide Song Lan or Xue Yang is love interest coded #Xue Yang is absolutely living the full MXTX love interest experience except the author somehow didn't notice it's a romcom? #where is his third act where the mc realizes that all that lies between them is a big pile of misunderstandings and totally irrelevant #murders. he can make a zombie a-qing if he feels like it #sometimes I yearn to express my feelings about this body of work in graph form #love interest's ability to care about things that are not mc: down up down #love interest's ability to tolerate estranged bff #up up up #mxtx love interests wear grey and pink factoid is false #Lan Wangji who lives on a mountain and wears nothing but white #is an outlier and should not be counted

[scrollll]

Okay... so what happened to Nant after Phop knocked him out? Because he was found naked somewhere else AND died of an overdose and not strangulation...

#i mean the authorities did not look for a murderer #and i may stretch a little but if you strangle someone and push him down there will be marks of a fight on the body #signs of struggle and such that indicates that there was a fight #but there was not a word about it #all thought Nant died of his own fault and overdosed #now... who gave him the overdose? #playboyy the series #playboyy #too much thoughts inside my head #also how could've Phop moved Nants body somewhere else? this is a heavy object you try to cover so how???

[midnights-wish]

''More women are murdering people these days,' says Joyce. 'If you ignore the context, it is a real sign of progress.''

Richard Osman, 'The Man Who Died Twice'.

#thursday murder club #the man who died twice #richard osman #author #tmc #book blog #booklr #books #quotes #books and literature #books and libraries #books and reading #book quotes #reading #bookish #bookshelf #on my bookshelf #bookworm #book #book recommendations #bookblr #books & libraries #queue #progress

[facetsofthecloset]

i'm sure it's been said but i feel like both Raxtus and Ronodin can be argued as "the only gay kid in the family and consequently shunned/rejected" and it's like. so weird bc Mull is so Mormon he'd probably rather eat his shorts than even acknowledge the possible existence of gays but

i mean. Raxtus literally has a fairy form. he's a fairy dragon.

Ronodin was just emo lol

and they both get so thoroughly rejected and sidelined by their families their whole lives and it turns Raxtus into an awkward but basically decent guy who runs back to the approval of his family once he's performed masculinity/violence enough to be accepted, only to then realize that he's basically just being used and still not fully trusted/accepted and having to betray them to save his real friends

(who sadly are probably actually homophobic but that's ok bc they're not dragon-phobic so that works out for him)

while Ronodin's like "fuck it. chaos and murder then!" and can you really blame him? he spent his entire life trying to conform to the "right" (in this case, Light) way of life, started spending time with the outgroup and learned to question things, then was told he was "too corrupt" to remain in his home

like. the symbolism is right there.

it's so funny, because sure Raxtus isn't a bad guy, but Ronodin definitely is and he pretty much gets sent to a type of hell at the end of Dragonwatch

and while Raxtus gets kind of a happy ending, like, him becoming an effective killer in a war and being accepted by his dad for being Good At Murder in the first Fablehaven series is presented as a happy ending. if Celebrant didn't wind up being the main villain for Dragonwatch, that probably would've been the end of it! gay kid learns how to soldier and is finally accepted by his homophobic family bc he's finally aggressive enough for them to love him

(i mean i have MANY issues with Celebrant being the main villain later and the reasons he's framed as bad but like. that's a separate rant lol)

the queer reading is right there. but also it's very bad and you can tell completely unintentional. or at the very least highly repressed. idk man i don't look into Mull as a personal individual bc i doubt i'll like what i see and i don't care that much but Dragonwatch was SO MUCH MORE MORMON than Fablehaven already was and it's so weird, seeing the fingerprints of it all over.

i feel like he either has a new editor or he's been doing this for long enough and sold enough books that he has the clout to veto changes made by editors or SOMETHING, bc i feel like? he's gotten worse?? and more unfiltered?? that or something happened and he's like. even more religious than before or something idk

like fablehaven was just kinda generic/bland fantasy with some fun ideas for magic items/powers/one sentence character premises, with just a hint of sus Mormon ideology, and then Dragonwatch just went. Full Mormon.

but then there's somehow even more weirdly queer shit. like. he's repressing so hard he's approaching queer from the other side??

idk man i wish this deeply mediocre man's writing wasn't a formative piece of middle school reading, leading to me still giving more of a shit than i really should over questionable children's literature now

#i mean it seems like his wife may or may not have divorced him between the series's so maybe that had something to do with it #i didn't look too deeply into it i just kinda guessed from his about the author blurbs wording changes #also wtf was up with the weird borderline piss/humiliation kink thing in the latest candy shop war book? #like. that was. that was not funny at all if it was meant to be comedic. like the execution was SO BOTCHED if so #and if it wasn't??? it was just????? UNCOMFY??? #sorry i'm tired and kind of delirious and for whatever reason this man's writing's squandered potential still haunts me #like genuinely if i ever publish original fiction there's a good chance it'll be fanfic of this with the serial numbers filed off #like 'MINE I'LL DO IT /RIGHT/ OK GIMME' #fablehaven #dragonwatch #i know ronodin is overrated and like. yeah he's not really a sexyman to me but he IS still compelling as a character #i think he's funny i wanna be his therapist #like stereotypical him lying down on a chaise longue thing #but also i reserve the right to make fun of him so like. not a very ethical therapist lol #get it all out queer boy let's get you to a gay club and find some fairies who WILL accept you #just cool it with the murder and the manipulation a bit y'know

[chaoticwhoknows]

currently reading the atlas six and my current favorite pov is tristan solely bc he is like “everyone here is batshit crazy and im saying that as a guy with insane daddy issues, who was raised by a witch gang leader, and who just quit my job and broke up with my billionaire heiress fiancée to come to a mysterious academic cult” and it’s the realest shit. why is he the most normal. why is he the only one who is phased by anything that has happened so far. also he Fucks (literally)

#IM ONLY A HUNDRED PAGES IN SO BE NICE #like libby and nico (who went to magical nyu btw) are so unphased with murder #and he’s like ‘ik IM unphased about it bc of my Tragic Backstory but why tf are YOU like this #and. Well. #fair question there #anyway almost all of the characters have a body count atp and no one seems to care #murder is a okay ig #either it’s a testament to how messy their backstories are or it’s an oversight by the author #he’s also the only one who doesn’t just. immediately assume everyone else is useless #other than maybe libby #so he’s the least insufferable #i <3 my little gold digger #the atlas six

[capinejghafa]

I was lowkey curious if there was a romance aspect in Ninth House... so I googled it... and like...

#they are also both murderers who deserve each other fjfkjfjfjf #im dying this is so funny #this author needs to go outside more or something... #random #myra reads ninth house #i guess i got some mild spoilers but whatever its fine 😂😂😂 #myra's reading adventures

[kpopandbookschild]

Book poll round 2 #2

#renegades #marissa meyer #a good girl's guide to murder #holly jackson #the girl who could fly #victoria forest #the maze runner #tmr #james dashner #the giver #lois lowry #the wingfeather saga #on the edge of the dark sea of darkness #andrew peterson #twisted tales #disney #assorted authors #rangers apprentice #royal ranger #rangers apprentice: royal ranger #john flannagan #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc #shannon messenger #the lunar chronicles #cinder #anne frank #anne frank: the diary of a young girl #nutcracker #nutcracker and the four realms

[drumlincountry]

I'm so surprised to see so many ppl talking about the end of Young Mungo being depressing or dark........ like the middle is horrific! Many things in this book are horrific. but the end is a beautiful beacon of hope?

#I'm reminded that a friend of mine wasn't allowed to read Jacqueline Wilson as a kid bc their mother thought it was too dark #And that I and another friend of mine adored Jacqueline Wilson because she was the only author who wrote about kids like US #Not that my life has been very like the lives in Young Mungo #Well. No yeah it has. Been similar. To some of them. #He rejects toxic masculinity and the cycle of violence! #His family who can't accept him nevertheless protect him one last time while he leaves to a world with breathable air! #SPOILERS he even murders both his rapists #He does the minimum violence he needs to survive and escape and then he escapes and survives and runs away with his boyfriend??? #I don't see how that's depressing.... #Me Fein #Queer tag #Books #Young mungo

[godidontevenknowwhat]

Not to sound like a dick but I don't care.

Anyone who thinks Billy is a bully has obviously never been sincerely bullied before 🤷‍♀️ People who think Billy is homophobic have never dealt with a homophobe before 🤷‍♀️ And tbh people who think Billy is an irredeemable villain who deserved to be abused haven't dealt with abuse at the level he did or experienced a real abused person outside of them being portrayed as uwu soft babies in the media 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

#as someone who has been bullied received homophobic attention AND was abused by a parent i am the authority do not question me #billy hargrove #pro billy hargrove #antis interact and i'll murder you in cold blood

[midnights-wish]

''Ibrahim presses play, and they all watch as the figure in the motorcycle helmet walks down the row of lockers and stops in front of 531. The figure inserts a key. 'Looks like he's having trouble with the lock too,' says Joyce. 'Or she,' says Ron. Ibrahim notes that Ron is getting much sharper on his gender neutrality.''

Richard Osman, 'The Man Who Died Twice'.

#thursday murder club #the man who died twice #richard osman #author #tmc #book blog #booklr #books #quotes #book quotes #books and literature #books and libraries #books and reading #reading #read #bookish #bookworm #book #bookshelf #on my bookshelf #book recommendations #bookblr #queue

[k1rishiki]

the thing about the queer media tournament that really gets me is that last i checked there wasn't a single mxtx work on it. like not even the untamed made it in and don't get me wrong the og mo dao zu shi books are huge but cql is def more popular among tumblr circles. idk it just really rubs me the wrong way how every single piece of western media that ppl have ever gotten a lil bit aggressive abt shipping with is there and then for east asian media there's utena and madoka magica and the handmaiden and last i checked that was pretty much it. and then for the rest of the world there's next to/nothing but idk enough to really make judgements there.

#like. really? no mo dao zu shi? no scum villain's self saving system? no heaven's official blessing? no nana? #i can think of at least 10-20 pieces of media more deserving of being in there than some of the western works that got in off the top of my #head. yuri is my job (self explanatory). fate/stay night (most of the cast is bi but esp rin bc she says it out loud + saber trans coded). #fate/extra (red saber canon bi + nameless archer. stay night lancer. kirei and issei are all there). black butler (grelle trans. also #eric and alan from one of the musicals + alois from s2 of the accursed anime + nina and possibly mey rin are all gay) #toilet bound hanako kun (kou and mitsuba went canon). the evillious chronicles (michaela. clarith and bruno are gay. bohemo possibly trans. #gallerian possibly gay). requiem of the rose king (self explanatory). project sekai (mizuki trans. minori and rui possibly gay). #cocoon entwined (literally a yuri). fucking honkai impact 3rd (lesbians but i don't play it so idk who). any uc gundam series w char and #amuro but especially char's counterattack (char and amuro explicitly confirmed to be gay 4 each other by author + movie focuses on their #relationship). also mobile suit zeta gundam (char and amuro together + kamille is a boy's name!). turn a gundam (gay character). #iron blooded orphans (gay character). the witch from mercury (about a lesbian relationship). melty blood (ries and sion lesbians). #guilty gear (bridget (self explatory)). sailor moon (mainly uranus and neptune lesbians but also apparently there are a lot of gay #characters i didn't know abt in sailor moon). the illustrated guide to monster girls (yuri moment). dramatical murder (yaoige). slow damage #(yaoige). sweet pool (yaoige). ouran high school host club (haruhi gender stuff and also her dad's whole deal). cowboy bebop (ed gender #stuff). fullmetal alchemist (envy nonbinary). neon genesis evangelion (kaworu and shinji). like half the villainess isekai out there. #haruhi suzumiya series (the girl herself is openly bisexual). omniscient reader's viewpoint (danmei). fucking re:zero has a trans girl in i #for god's sake. we're well past 20 so i'm allowing myself more fate. fate/extra ccc (red saber again but also gil and caster and bb and-). #fate/hollow ataraxia (follows same cast as f/sn). today's menu for the emiya family (follows same cast as f/sn again. also the switch game #metatextually canonizes shirou's crush on lancer if the interesting descriptions from f/sn and the various bits from f/ha didn't convince #you). fate/apocrypha (rider of black + saber of red transfemme nonbinary and trans guy respectively. the former is also bi). fate/samurai #remnant (f/sr saber nonbinary. also gil is there and rogue archer is def implied to be bi in f/go). fate/zero (waver gay rider bi. saber gi #and kirei are all there and at their most bisexual). the case files/adventures of lord el melloi ii (waver spinoff (self explanatory)). #fate/strange fake (gil and waver are there. also false lancer nonbinary and jester trans). fate/grand order (has p much every character fro #the franchise and more. notably added trans anime girl leonardo da vinci). ok no more fate. since the tournament has a p liberal definition #of media i'm including vocasongs. magnet by minato ft miku and luka (lesbian song abt lesbians). erase or zero by hzedge ft len and kaito #(magnet for boys). himitsu ~kuro no chikai~ by hitoshizuku and yama ft len rin and miku (angel rin falls in love w miku. disguises herself #as a human man to be with her). i think i've made my point clear but add my initial list of the big famous ones (-nana) from the 1st tag. #romeo.txt

[r-biter]

You ever look at someone and go 'wow u look like my friends artstyle'

#anyway this one author whos also a murderer looks like andi could draw her so easily