#and she’s happy to do it because she’s being herself and doing what she wants and being who she wants

[helenanell]

A Breath of Life || Challengers

Pairing(s) : Reader x Patrick – Reader x Art – Reader x Tashi (sort of.) 

CW: MDNI - 18+ : smut, rough / manhandling. Infidelity. Angst. A lot of yearning. (They all want each other, badly.) Manipulative behaviour. Minor spoilers for the film.

Notes: Female Reader (AFAB Reader) - Absolutely no use of y/n, (because I despise it, sorry)

Wordcount: 9.7K

Summary: You met Tashi in your final year of high school and were more than happy to have lost a tennis match against her. Afterwards, the two of you become inseparable and you find yourself feeling for her in a way that you don’t quite understand.And then things get even more complicated when Patrick and Art burst into your lives. As the years pass, desire, love and hatred all get tangled together...and so do the four of you.

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The idea of meeting Tashi Duncan had been much more intimidating than the actual event itself. It was an odd thing, to idolise someone who was the exact same age as you—a girl not yet out of high school and still so chronically unsure of herself and the world—but it was impossible not to. 

You had watched every single match of hers that you could, staring for so long at the way she moved, that you were left with the afterimage of her burned into your eyes: She was in your thoughts constantly and always waiting behind your eyes when you closed them hoping for sleep. 

You were brilliant at tennis, you knew that you were. But Tashi played like it was the only way she could take oxygen into her lungs; each serve and shot an inhalation and exhalation. You understood, because you felt something similar.

For a long time, you had been ignored or dismissed in every aspect of your life, by everyone. But then you had found tennis, and you were really fucking great at it. 

 Tennis saved your life by making you undeniably tangible. Your existence could not be disputed when someone had to react to your movements, to receive something you had offered. 

It was no wonder then, that for as long a match lasted you were unhealthily obsessed with whoever it was that you were playing against. They made you real. 

But then you played Tashi. You had lost, of course, but it had been a close match, neither of you dominating for long before the other gained the upper hand once more. The gasps from the crowd had been the swelling of some great tide, breaking against your flesh and reinvigorating you like freezing water. 

Once it was over, you felt bereft of something vital. You felt as though you had slipped back into non-existence, only this time it was worse than ever, because your connection to Tashi Duncan was gone. 

But your body remembered. It ached and throbbed, rebelling at all you had put it through- no. All Tashi had put it through. You were desperate to feel it again. 

And your prayer was answered. 

She appeared before you like an angel.

Tashi jogged over to you as you gathered your things after the match, flushed and with beads of sweat glistening on her skin like crystals. And her eyes…they had been wide and dark and enrapturing. And then she had said the words that would change the trajectory of your life: 

“So, when can I play you again?”

━━━━∙⋆⋅⋆∙━━━━

Ruah is the Hebrew word that means God’s spirit, but it is also breath or air and is widely understood to be God’s presence in the world. 

You couldn’t remember when you had learnt the word, but you knew that in the Bible, God had created Adam by breathing life into him. Which was why, when anyone joked about Tashi Duncan being some kind of deity, you could not dispute it, because that is what she had done to you. 

Tashi had breathed life into you.

 Her presence in your life has allowed you to come alive even off the court: you finally felt like a real person. Thanks to her, you knew that when you put your racket down, you did not simply disappear. 

Tashi saw you, on and off the court, and you loved her for it.

But, by the time you were both accepted into Stanford, over a year after you’d first met, you still wouldn’t let yourself delve into that love, and work out the ways in which you felt it. Not only because, you’d only ever been drawn to guys in any romantic or sexual way, but also because you felt undeserving of her.

 How pathetic would it be for you, who crawled at your best friend’s feet, to look up and whimper out words of desire to her?

 You were blessed to have her in your life, let alone to be as close with her as you were. Love was so many disparate things; you could love her as a friend, and hold that carnal aspect deep down. Just having her in your life was more than enough. She was enough.

Or so you thought. 

At the party celebrating Tashi, the two of you had not yet left each other’s side. You were dancing together, close enough that you could feel the ecstasy of victory buzzing beneath her skin as she held your hands and pulled you close. Her hair was silken and flowing down her back and as you were tangled up with her, it tickled against your own exposed skin. 

“They’re still staring.” You whisper into her ear, laughing as she answers by twirling you around and then pulling you back in. 

You practically fall into one another, having to steady yourself by placing your hands on her hips, the beaded fabric of her dark blue dress digging into the palms of your hands. 

“Good.” Tashi answers, wrapping her arms around your shoulders.

She turns you enough that with your chin resting on her shoulder, you are looking right at the two boys who had been gawking all night. One dark haired with confidence coming off him in waves, the other more reserved, a different kind of potency bubbling beneath the surface.

The blonde’s eyes meet yours and he tilts his head, offering a delicate but untethering smile. 

“You’re going to have to talk to them.” You offer, still held in Tashi’s arms. “Otherwise they’re going to follow you around like lost puppies all night.”

You gasp and squirm away as your friend playfully pinches your side.

 “Do you really think they’re just looking at me?” Tashi questions incredulously.

You laugh at her shock. “Of course they are.” You say, gesturing up and down her form as she continues to sway to the music. 

“Oh my God!” Tashi exclaims, grabbing your hand and pulling you close again. “You’re such a fucking idiot! They’re looking at you, too!” 

You roll your eyes, but can’t help feeling a little buoyed at the prospect of being desired. “Yeah, right.”

Tashi shakes her head. “It’s a good thing you’re so oblivious, I like having you all to myself!”

Heat floods every part of you, acutely aware of the sweat trickling down the back of your neck, your skin uncomfortably warm. 

Only when the two of you have stopped dancing do they come over. 

Art Donaldson and Patrick Zweig saunter needfully into your life and had you known then all that would ensue, you still would have welcomed their approach. 

━━━━∙⋆⋅⋆∙━━━━

The four of you had wandered down to the beach. 

Art and Patrick were sitting on deck chairs that sat side by side, their legs stretched out and their gazes lustful, both of them looking at Tashi who was perched on a rock opposite them. In that moment, the moon seemed made only for her, the silver light lining her form. 

You sit on the sand near her, your legs pulled up to your chest. The waves softly hit the beach behind you, lulling you into an even more incorporeal mindset. All that exists to you, is Tashi and the two boys who so clearly want her. 

Despite how desperately you want to engage in their conversation, you’re exhausted and distracted by the knowledge that your parents will already be looking for you. 

You’ve rested your chin on your knees, your eyes drooping shut, when a voice calls out to you. 

“Hey, are you okay?”

 Art is crouching beside you, his hand on your back, his knees sinking into the sand, shifting the surface beneath you. You jolt at the contact, scrambling to your feet as Tashi chuckles.

 Patrick’s gaze flits between you and Art and then over to your best friend, his cheeks dimpled with a smirk. 

“I’m fine.” You reassure with a shaky smile, brushing sand off the back of your dress. “I should go though, my parents will be waiting.” 

“You can’t leave!” Patrick protests playfully, placing a hand to his chest. “You’ll break my heart.”

You grin, spurred on by his own smile and shrug. “And why should I care about that?”

Patrick’s mouth drops open in feigned hurt as Art chuckles, shoving his hands into his pockets and stepping away from you. 

You turn to Tashi, meaning to say goodbye, but she’s already up and hugging you. She often kisses your cheek as a form of goodbye, but this time she gets so close that her lips tease the corner of your mouth as hers make contact. You are electrified by it.

You know that she isn’t doing it for you, which is confirmed when she pulls away with her eyes flitting giddily between Art and Patrick who have both gone utterly still as they watched the display. 

 Despite the jealous ache that blooms, you play into it, because another part of you is excited at the thought of working the two boys up. You pull Tashi back into a hug, your hands resting dangerously low on her back as you squeeze her. She giggles into your ear. 

“You already have them wrapped around your little finger.” You say it quietly, but loud enough that you know the boys will hear. 

Over Tashi’s shoulder, you see Patrick smirk again and Art runs his thumb over his his bottom lip with a small smile on his face.

When you do finally pull away, Tashi smacks you on the ass. 

“It was great to meet to you!” Art shouts after you. 

“I miss you already!” Is Patrick’s shouted offering.

You just shake your head and continue on your path away from the beach.

Unbeknownst to you, three sets of eyes follow you until you’ve disappeared from view.

When you get home, you still feel the touch of Tashi all over you. But when your hand dips under the covers, something has changed. Because when you close your eyes, it’s not just Tashi you see. Instead, multiple people are fighting for dominance in your midnight fantasy:

You see Patrick’s licentious smirk.

You see Art’s coy smile. 

They’ve both invaded your mind, corrupted your thoughts that for a year had been so gloriously void of anything but Tashi.

And from that moment, you know part of you will always hate them. For so long, even knowing you can’t have her, all you’ve needed to sate yourself are thoughts of Tashi. But they’ve changed that.

You hate Patrick Zweig and Art Donaldson because they’ve made you want more. You want….one of them. You don't know why and you also don’t know which one of them it is. 

But what is clear to you, is that a new itch has arisen within you, and it comes with panic, because unlike with Tashi, you’re certain there’s a possibility that one of them might actually want to scratch the itch for you.

━━━━∙⋆⋅⋆∙━━━━

Had he known how furious you were going to be with him when you arrived, you doubted Art would have been so eager to invite you to have lunch with him in the cafeteria. 

Even when you slam your tray down and drop into the seat opposite him, he still looks happy to see you. He always did. It was infuriating.

“What are you playing at, Art?” You struggle to keep your volume down. You hadn’t wanted to yell at someone in a long time, but he had managed it.

Concern flashes in his eyes, but his lips press together in a way that tells you he knows exactly what you’re referring to. And yet he still asks:

“What are you talking about?”

“You’re fucking with Tashi’s head.”

“I would never do that.”

You scoff, stabbing the flimsy plastic fork into your salad. “Except you are, and I know that you’re doing it on purpose.”

Art pushes his own tray to the side and settles his elbow onto the table, resting his chin on his hand. “Yeah, how’d you figure?”

“Why else would you tell her that Patrick doesn’t love her?”

“Because I don’t think he does. Do you?”

You ignore his question, instead opting to pick up your apple and throw it at his head, hard. He catches it, that damnable little smile still on his face. 

“For fuck sake, Art!” You erupt. “She needs to keep her head on straight. Don’t upset her just because you want her for yourself!”

He tilts his head, blue eyes sparkling as he takes a large bite out of the apple. He chews for a bit before holding it back out to you, speaking through a mouthful:

 “You should have the rest of this, you haven’t been eating enough.”

“Fuck you!” You snatch it from his hand and shift in your seat, easily throwing it and landing it right in a nearby trashcan.

“Well that was a waste of perfectly good fruit.” Art licks some residue off his thumb and then leans across the table. 

You fail to snatch your wrist away before he grabs it. He’s gentle but firm, and as his thumb rubs along your pulse point, you feel the residual moisture from his own mouth he’d left behind, transferring to your skin.

“You don’t have to fight this hard to protect her,” Art presses. “She’s a grown woman.”

“She’s my best friend and I don’t want you to hurt her.” 

Art’s thumb stills, but he tugs your wrist a little closer. “Do you really think I could?” 

You scowl, pulling free of his hold. “You know, the way you and Patrick worship her isn’t the compliment that you both seem to think it is. You’re putting her up on a pedestal, practically deifying her, but she’s not invulnerable. She feels more strongly than anyone I’ve ever known and tennis is her life. If you get in her head and fuck up her game, It will break her and then I will break your fucking hands.”

This time when he’s smiles, it’s rife with fondness for you and it makes you want to punch him for the fluttering it causes in your stomach.

“You didn’t answer my question.” He says simply.

“What?”

“Do you think Patrick loves her?” Art repeats patiently. 

“Do you love her, Art?” 

“Can you please just answer my question?”

“I don’t know!” You throw your hands up in exasperation. “I’m not even sure I would know love if I saw it. All I do know, is that you both lust after her and definitely for each other too, even if you’ll never admit it. You’re all totally fucked.”

Art’s jaw clenches, the muscles ticking, but instead of irritation or anger at your outburst, his gaze softens. When he speaks, it is soft and achingly tender:

“You do know love. Because you love Tashi.” 

You let out an embittered laugh. “Of course I do. I tell her all the time.”

“But she doesn’t love you, not in the same way.”

You really didn’t know if he intended for that to sting, especially not with how gently he’d said it, but if he had, he’d failed. You came to accept that fact a long while ago, and while you would always want Tashi in some respect, it was not the all consuming desire it had been. The lust was gone. She was important to you. She was your best friend and you wanted to protect her. 

Unfortunately, the two men you wanted to protect her from, were the ones who had usurped her as objects of desire in your mind.

“Are you trying to find yourself a catchphrase before you go pro?” You sneer at Art. “I’m not sure how great that would look on a billboard for Adidas.”

“You deserve to be loved.” 

You had picked up your cup to take a drink of water, but upon hearing his words, you slam it down again and rise to your feet. He tracks your every move, as calm as ever.

 “I can’t talk to you right now, Art. You’re being cruel.”

You storm away from the table, only making it a few steps before you hear the scrape of his chair against the floor as he rushes to follow you.

 You’ve only just pushed open the door when he crowds up behind you. 

Art’s hand lands on your back as he guides you outside, his other hand rests on your arm and even after he turns you to face him, his touch remains.

 His hand is wrapped lightly around your arm, the other keeping you close- his palm pressed against your lower back. Anyone watching would think he was drawing you into an embrace. You almost shudder at the contact.

 Patrick has always been handsy, touching and caressing you under the guise of teasing, but Art has always moved around you as though you’ll disintegrate at the lightest touch. The way he’d held your wrist back in the dining hall and how he cradles you now, is the most he’s ever touched you.

 Your chest heaves as your flesh tingles.

Art’s head drops, his eyes on his own hand on your arm, as if he can’t understand why he’s holding you. His voice is strained:

“Patrick isn’t good for her.”

And just like that, you’re slammed mercilessly back down to earth. 

Art wasn’t touching you with tenderness or affection, you were just someone he was holding in place so that you had to hear him out. So you had to hear how much he wanted Tashi. 

“Oh, but I deserve to be thrown at him as a distraction so that you can have her?” You snap at him, more hurt than you’ll ever admit.

“You deserve whatever it is that you actually want.” 

Art sounds frustrated now, not at you…but perhaps at what he knows you won’t say. You do want Patrick. But you also want him. You had just never considered that he knew that.

But that’s not what you say. Instead you say–

“Go fuck yourself.”

“Do you want to know why he isn’t good for her?” Art presses, entirely unaffected by your fury.

“No, but I’m sure you’re about to tell me.”

The hand on your back pulls you a little closer, one errant blonde curl falls down from his forehead and brushes your temple. His breath is hot against your cheek. 

“Patrick’s not good for her-“ Art begins, his tone becoming embittered. “Because he wants you. He always has.” 

You rip free from Art’s grip with such force that the friction of it burns, his fingerprints leaving red marks on your arm. “You are unbelievable!” 

“I’m not lying. You know I wouldn’t, not to you.”

“You will say anything to have her won’t you?” You laugh nastily. “What’s the plan, Art? Do you think that I’ll try and seduce Patrick away from her now, leaving a space open for you to swoop in?” 

“Ask me how I know.”

“No.” You spit back at him. 

But you don’t move. 

Your body waits for words that your mind doesn’t think it can handle hearing. Something feels so close to breaking and you can’t help but feel like it’s to do with whatever force binds the four of you together. 

Art steps forward, closing the distance again, he raises his hands and rests them on either side of your neck, his thumbs pressing onto where your pulse is ratcheting beneath your fragile skin. 

“I know he wants you, because the night after he won our match- when he won Tashi’s number- he told me that I should fuck you.”

“Art.” You warn, frustrated tears bringing horrible pressure behind your eyes.

A small group comes out of the dining hall and have to split down the middle, because neither of you move a muscle. Art’s hold tightens, like he’s trying to leave a permanent imprint behind without it hurting you. 

He whispers now. “Patrick told me to fuck you. And I know him. He said that because when he couldn't have you, it excited him to think that I would. That I'd tell him about sleeping with you.”

“That was such a long time ago.” You say shakily, coming completely unmoored.

But Art won’t let it go.

“He still looks at you the same way, and that’s not fair to Tashi. You want to protect her, right? Well what will it do her when she finally notices the way her boyfriend is constantly eye-fucking her best friend?”

You hit out against his chest with a closed fist. The shock more than the force makes him stagger back. 

“You are so fucked in the head! You and Patrick are both pathetic little leeches who want the same girl, but can’t cope with the way it’s made them realise that they also want each other. You know what? I actually think so much would be solved, if you and Patrick just fucked each other!”

You start to back away and Art darts forward, trying to grab you again, but you smack his hand away and turn your back.

“Leave me alone, Art! And leave me out of your shit!”

He calls out your name with ragged desperation, but he does not follow. And even though he’s truly made your skin crawl, something about that makes you even more furious. 

Why won’t he follow you? 

Why do you still want him to?

━━━━∙⋆⋅⋆∙━━━━

You hadn’t spoken to any of them since your argument with Art. 

You couldn’t cope with the realisation that if any of them ever did feel any desire for you, it was only because they saw you as some sort of vessel through which they could access parts of the person that they truly wanted.  

You couldn’t even be said to exist in Tashi’s shadow anymore, you had simply been subsumed by it. Those two men, who you both despised and wanted desperately, would never see you, not really. To them, you were just part of her. But you would not let them ruin your friendship with Tashi. You just wouldn’t.

You knew when you arrived to watch her match that something wasn’t right. She was upset. You could see it in all the minutiae of her: in the way she took off her hoodie, in the way she picked up her racket. Something was really wrong. 

You walk through the stands until you come across Art. 

There are two free spaces to the right of him, so you sit down on the one furthest away, leaving a gap in the middle for Patrick to take up when he arrives. But then time passes and the match approaches and he still hasn’t materialised. 

You feel Art staring long before he makes his move. The air shifts as he shuffles over into the seat directly beside you.

“That seat is taken.” You intone harshly. Your eyes are fixed on Tashi as she prepares. 

“If it was, I wouldn’t have been able to sit in it.” 

“Sorry, I should have been clearer. I don’t want you anywhere near me, so I want Patrick to sit there instead of you.”

Your name is a tentative as he speaks it. “Will you please look at me? I can’t handle you not looking at me.”

Your gaze remains set on Tashi, she looks up and finds you in the crowd. The furious divot between her brow eases for a moment before her eyes snag on the way that Art is leaning into you. She turns her back on the entire crowd, but you know the gesture is meant for you alone. 

Fuck. What the hell had happened overnight? If it was Art’s meddling, you’d kill him. 

“The match is about to start.” You say coldly. 

 Art’s hand lands on your knee, but when you flinch, he immediately pulls it away. 

“I know I hurt you and I’m sorry. I- I need you to forgive me.”

You grit your teeth at his audacity. “Why do you need me to, Art?”

“Because I can’t stand the thought of you not being in my li-“

The match begins and Art never gets to finish his sentence. 

In fact, you don’t speak to him properly for almost a decade after that. Because Tashi gets hurt. Her sporting career ends in the blink of an eye and takes your friendship with it.

━━━━∙⋆⋅⋆∙━━━━

Both you and Art had sprinted down onto the court, your heart breaking in your chest as you fell to your knees beside your best friend, tears gathering in her eyes as she whimpered in pain. 

What had hurt the most though, was the way Tashi had shoved your hand away when you had tried to comfort her.

“Don’t touch me!” She had barked on a ragged breath. “Get away from me. Get away!” 

The hatred had dripped from her words and landed on you like a corrosive liquid. And as it had burned down to the bone, you had looked at Art and the apologetic agony with which he’d regarded you—even as he’d cradled Tashi’s head in his hands—told you what he’d done.  

He’d not only told you about Patrick’s supposed lust for you, but he’d also told Tashi. He had told her that even after her now boyfriend had won her number, he’d apparently been thinking about fucking you. Art had also definitely shared his little insight that Patrick didn’t love her either, which you quickly worked out had contributed to his absence.

So Art got what he wanted: he finally had his hands on Tashi and he’d done it by carving you and Patrick away. 

Art Donaldson was an attentive, gentle, even needy man, but you had been so stupid to think that meant he couldn’t also be calculated and cruel. Because of course he was. What else could win the heart of Tashi Duncan but brutal passion? It was part of what she loved about tennis: the unforgiving force of hits that once you met them, somehow felt like affection.

When Patrick had tracked an injured Tashi down, still waiting to be taken to hospital, he had been ordered away by both her and Art.

You knew that because he’d just told you. It was the first thing he’d said to you when you’d let him into your room fifteen minutes earlier.

Now, you were both sitting on the scratchy carpet of your dorm, passing a bottle of vodka between the two of you. 

You felt bereft. Your body wracked with sympathetic pain for the grief in your mind. You’d lost Tashi today, you knew that. And the man that had caused it, was a man you’d spent years yearning for. 

Art hadn’t only taken Tashi from you, but he’d violently ripped himself away too.

“Art wasn’t lying.” Patrick grumbles after taking another hearty gulp of vodka. 

“Please, don’t.” You beg wearily, taking the vodka from his outstretched hand and pressing it to your lips. Not even the burn of the spirit going down your throat registers.

“I wanted- want, both of you. You and Tashi.” 

He isn’t drunk, only tipsy, but he’s getting there, and his words are sluggish, laced with fury. 

“Shut up, Patrick.”

You fall down onto your back, resting the vodka bottle on your stomach, holding it by the neck as you stare up at the ceiling. 

Patrick has been sitting opposite you, but he moves languidly forward, crawling up over your body. He braces one knee beside your hip as the other slots between your legs. 

You blink up at him as one of his hands rests beside your head and the other falls over your own where it still holds the vodka bottle. You let him take it from you, placing it beside your body before the hand then moves to rest on the other side of your head. 

You’re now trapped beneath him, his lithe body hovering just above yours.

When he leans in, his alcoholic breath almost sears your skin as his lips brushed the shell of your ear. 

“Sometimes, when we were fucking I would imagine that you were with us.” Patrick’s teeth nip at your ear. “I asked her once, you know, and she slapped me. Called me a pig. I think she was just mad because she liked having you to herself. You were such a devoted acolyte, kissing the ground she walked on—“

Fury bursts within you like a solar flare, red-hot and ruinous. He was talking about her in the past tense, as if she was dead to both of you already.

Art groans in pain when you knee him in the balls. You use the chance to shove him off you and he falls to the side, knocking the bottle of vodka over. 

As you stand up, you feel the alcohol seeping into the carpet at your feet. 

“You are a pig.” You hiss down at him.

 It’s your room, but you find yourself storming towards the door. 

You don’t get far before Patrick recovers, clambering to his feet and easily closing the distance with his long legs. 

You groan in frustration as he presses you into the door, one hand above your head and the other wrapping around your torso, his fingers dangerously close to brushing your breasts over your tank top. 

“If I’m a pig, why did you let me in?” He pressed his face into your neck and breathes you in.

 Some of the vodka has evidently soaked into his shirt, because the scent seizes you with the same violence with which he had. It’s a secondary intoxication. 

You words come out weakly, and you hate that it’s because you’re using so much energy fighting the urge to press back into him:

“I felt sorry for you.”

Patrick laughs. 

The smug bastard actually laughs right into your skin, the vibrations travelling all the way down to where your body has begun to ache the most. 

“Oh, sure.” He coos patronisingly. “It definitely wasn’t because you’ve wanted to fuck me for years.”

You should fight him, but you don’t want to. 

You should protest when the hand that he has pressed to the door moves to pull down one of the straps of your tank top. But you simply don’t want to.  You want him. 

Art had been right about both of you.

No sooner has the thin strip of fabric been removed from your shoulder, than Patrick is clamping his teeth down on the exposed flesh. You yelp in surprise, the pain a burst of sordid pleasure. 

Patrick laughs again, the hand he has pressed to your stomach pulling you flush against him. You can feel his need for you pressing into your backside, but in case you had somehow missed it, he bucks his hips up into you. 

You gasp and he laughs again, his tongue now running over the aggravated skin where his teeth have left a dent.

“We both know what this is.” He goads.

“And what is it?” You ask teasingly, your head now thrown back and resting against his chest. He groans into your neck as you grind yourself back onto him. 

“Inevitable.”

“Are you just doing this to get back at them?” You ask, not daring to speak their names. 

An angry grumble you can’t quite make sense of tears out of Patrick’s throat just before he is forcefully spinning you around. 

You get barely a glimpse of his feral smirk before he is easily picking you up again and throwing you over his shoulder. The slap he delivers to your ass is punishing and stings furiously as he practically throws you down onto the carpet.

The bed is right next to you, but the asshole apparently wants you on the scratchy carpet and with a wet patch where the vodka has soaked in.

“I’m doing this, because I have wanted to fuck you, from the moment I saw you dancing at that party.”

 You’ve barely got your breath back after being thrown about, when he is grabbing your calf and yanking you down so that you’re laying completely flat beneath him. 

“But you only ever pursued Tash-“ 

He cuts you off from saying her name by leaning down and pressing his mouth to your still clothed breast. His tongue swirls over the fabric, your nipple growing pert. 

When his knee presses up between your legs, parting them forcefully, your head falls back, strands of your hair wetted by the spilt alcohol. 

When Patrick bites down on your chest far too hard, your hand instinctively comes up to slap the side of his head.

 You’re so shocked by your own burst of violence that you go still at exactly the same time as Patrick, both of you breathing furiously. When he does peer up at you, his dark curls slick against his increasingly sweaty forehead, menace dances in his eyes. 

“Do that again.” 

You wish you could have feigned confusion or indignation for even a moment, but your blood is pumping to all the right places to urge you to make terrible, delightful decisions.

 Your second slap connects cleanly with his cheek, your palm tingling with the force as his head spins to the side. 

Your handprint is already a pink mark on his skin when he wraps his arms around your torso, lifting you up just enough so that he can pull your tank top off and throw it to the side. Your chest is left bare to him and he wastes no time before peppering kisses to your sternum, to your breasts and your neck, his arms still wrapped around you, his nails digging into your back. 

The throbbing ache between your legs becomes far too much to bear, so you curl your fingers into his hair and forcefully tug him away from your chest- a bead of saliva stretching between your flushed skin to his swollen lips. 

You lean your head forward, taking his bottom lip between your teeth and biting, pulling at it until he groans pathetically. You let him go, beyond pleased when you don’t have to tell him what you want next. 

You don’t want to wait any longer. You haven’t slept with anyone since you met him and Art. 

Art.

 Is it wrong that as Patrick pushes your back into the carpet and pulls down your sweatpants and underwear in one clean tug, that you close your eyes and briefly imagine that it’s Art instead?

You might have found an answer if you had more time, but when you open your eyes, Patrick is over you, his shorts and boxers already discarded alongside your clothes. His shirt is still on, but neither of you have the patience for the second or so it would take to get it off him. 

Patrick smirks down at you before pressing two of his fingers into your mouth, you open gladly, your eyes locked onto each other as he swirls them around. When he’s satisfied, he pulls his fingers out, and then licks his own hand, mixing himself with you. 

He swipes his wet hand over your already slick core a few times before he’s pressing himself inside of you. Your arms curl around his neck as you wrap your legs around his waist. 

“Fuck.” He groans, his tongue licking up the side of your neck as his hips begin to move. 

“Patrick.” You plead, your fingers digging into the nape of his neck. 

He knows what you want, nipping at your neck before he is driving into you with bruising force. 

In that moment, as you’re joined in the way you’ve wanted since the moment you’ve set eyes on him, you realise thar Tashi isn’t the only person that can make you feel real. 

As Patrick drives into you–his lips and teeth leaving marks on your flesh that will be wine-dark by morning, and the horrible fabric beneath you leaving carpet burn on your back– you finally know more than tennis can make you feel alive. 

The sex is forceful and punishing, but fuelled by a genuine passion. Nothing but your intermingled breaths and the sound of your joined bodies fills the room. 

If the two of you hadn’t been so lost to your pleasure, you might have heard Art knocking on your door. But you didn’t. 

He did however hear the two of you, so he walked away. 

You wouldn’t speak to him or Tashi again for over ten years.

━━━━∙⋆⋅⋆∙━━━━

You weren’t in New Rochelle to compete. You didn’t need to. You were on the top of your game, ranked the third best female player in the world. 

No, you were in New York because despite your better judgement-- and the many years that had passed since you’d last seen him--when Patrick Zweig had called you, you’d answered. 

You hadn’t heard his voice since you had told him that for your own sanity, you couldn’t see him anymore.

For the two years you had been together after Tashi had banished you both from her life, you had let Patrick consume you. And you had never played tennis so poorly in your life. 

You hated what that said about you, that you had willingly discarded someone you had genuinely cared for to improve your ability to hit a ball. But hitting that ball was what kept you alive, not him. 

Not only that, it hadn’t taken you long to realise that you didn’t love Patrick enough to let him affect your career.

And yet when he had called, you’d answered. And when he’d told you that Art Donaldson had entered the Challenger as a wildcard, you both knew that you would come. 

From the moment you had booked the flight, to the first step you’d taken into the hotel, you had lied to yourself that you were only coming for the closure that you hadn’t received as a twenty year old. 

But when you stepped into the hotel lobby and saw Tashi disappearing into the nearby elevator, your self-deception shattered. 

You were here because still, after all the time that had passed, you ached for the way that you had felt when she had been in your life. You missed her. And you had missed Art. 

It was a sickening truth of your life, that while no one had fucked with your head or upset you as much as Art had ended up doing, no one else had ever been so attentive to you either. 

Art had watched you—watched out for you—even when you weren’t playing tennis. In fact, in moments of utter stillness, when you had been doing nothing even remotely remarkable, was when you had always caught him staring. He never shied away, or broke his gaze when he was caught, he’d just smiled as if he wanted you to know he would never feel shame for being found looking at you. 

And that had not changed.

You have been sitting at the hotel bar for ten minutes, feeling sorry for yourself and nursing the same glass of gin and tonic, when you feel someone looking at you. 

You turn your head cautiously, your shoulders sagging as your eyes meet Art’s. He’s sitting on one of the small leather couches tucked into the far corner of the darkened room. 

It had been an inevitability, but things would have been so much easier if you never came across him. 

You know you shouldn’t move- part of you had come for closure and you could get that just by watching him compete tomorrow, so you don’t need to talk to him. 

But then Art tilts his head and smiles at you like no time has passed and pats his hand on the unoccupied space beside him on the couch. 

You get down off the barstool.

 As you approach, he watches unflinchingly.

The last time you had heard Art’s voice, was when Tashi had suffered her injury and he’d been permitted to stay by her side when she had ordered you away.

And yet even after so much time, when he greets you with a quiet ‘hello’, the pathetic girl who had pined after him returns.

You don’t respond as you come to a stop right in front of him, the tips of your heels right against the toes of his shoes, but you make no move to sit down. 

It’s of course not the first time you’ve seen him since college, or been at the same event, or even in the same room- you’re both highly successful tennis players, you couldn’t help but overlap sometimes. But neither of you have ever allowed yourselves to get close, or to even speak. 

It has been over ten years of your eyes connecting through crowds and across rooms that felt much larger than they were, simply because there was distance between the two of you within them. 

Art sits forward, his forearms resting on his knees. He’s fiddling with his wedding ring and you can’t bear to look at the familiar way his fingers carry out the gesture. 

When he looks up at you, it's so open and wanting that you almost turn right back around. But then you hear his voice again.

“Can I ask you to sit with me?” 

“I don’t know Art, can you?” 

He smiles, sighing softly as he runs his hand through his hair. It’s short- much shorter than the curls he’d had at college. You like it. It suits him. 

You shift on your feet, crossing your arms across your chest to cover up your nerves. Perhaps you can protect yourself if you look like you’re closed off from him and from…whatever this interaction is about to be. 

Art doesn’t say anything else, but he surprises you by rising to his feet. You stagger back, but his hand reaches out and lands on your side to steady.

His touch lingers for a moment too long, but he does eventually pull it away.

 But he’s still close, too close.

Your hands have fallen to your sides, so it is too easy for Art to reach out and brush his fingers against yours. He doesn’t intertwine them, but he’s doing enough to let you know that it’s what he wants to do. 

He whispers your name. “Will you please sit with me?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Art.” 

“When have you ever known me to have one of those?” 

You smile ruefully, but take a step back. His hand chases you, his fingers brushing against yours again as he tries to take your hand. 

“It’s been a long time since I’ve known anything about you.” You say, hating how sad it sounds. 

You should be angry at least. His meddling and his desire for Tashi is what ripped you all apart. And he has her now. They have a daughter together.

He doesn't get to ask you for anything, not even if it’s just to sit with him. 

You can’t trust yourself to sit next to him. 

“You do know me. Time can’t change that.” He insists, quietly but firmly. 

You scoff nastily. “I knew Art Donaldson when he was in college. The world famous tennis player who does AD campaigns for sports cars with his wife, is a stranger to me.” 

“Yeah.” Art laughs darkly. “He’s a stranger to me too.” 

You frown at him, growing angry. He seems exhausted and down-trodden. He’s clearly hurting and you hate that you know that—you hate that you‘d been able to tell that even from across the bar—because it means that he’s right: you do still know him. 

“It’s late, Art. You should get some rest. Big day tomorrow.”

You turn away from him and while he doesn’t reach for you this time, he does call out. You keep you back to him as he asks his question. 

“Who do you want to win, me or Patrick?” 

“Tennis can’t decide a victor between the two of you, Art. It’s never been able to.”

When you walk to the elevator, you feel a physical strain as you stop yourself from looking back at him.

━━━━∙⋆⋅⋆∙━━━━

You were right, tennis couldn’t decide on a winner: it was as fickle and incomprehensible as the human heart. Which was fitting, seeing as Tashi had always described tennis as a relationship. 

You had sat only two places away from her during Patrick and Art’s match, and you know she had seen you. But there had been no reaction, her face had been impassive and set on the court, her eyes hidden behind a large pair of sunglasses. 

Now, the match was long over and a result had been given. And yet there hadn’t been a victory for anyone. Just like you knew there wouldn’t be.

Something had happened on that court between the two men, some silent, inexplicable exchange that had altered the very fabric of them.

This time, when Art knocks on your door, not only do you hear it, but you answer. 

You feel almost shocked when you pull open the door to reveal him, dressed in a grey t-shirt and flannel pyjama trousers. You’re surprised at the sight as if you hadn’t known he was coming- as if you hadn’t readily offered up your room number when he had messaged and asked for it.

You’re also somehow certain that Patrick had given him your number, but you didn’t want to dwell on what sort of exchange had led to him handing it over.

Without a word, you step away from the door, self-consciously tightening the cord that holds the silk robe around your body. You stop and face the windows.

The curtains are drawn, by you stare forward as though the whole skyline is on display to you. 

The door to your room clicks shut.

You hear Art take off his shoes before his feet are padding towards you. 

When his arms wrap around your waist, you close your eyes and savour the sensation. He nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck, so you lift a hand and rest it on the side of his head. 

“I want to retire at the end of this year.” He says and you can feel his exhaustion in the slow breaths that coast over your neck. 

“So retire.” You answer softly, your eyes still on the curtains. “You’re tired.”

You know you don’t need to clarify. Thanks to the grateful press of his lips against your neck, you know he understands what you mean. 

Art is weary of all that he has to be when he’s playing tennis; he’s tired of the effort it takes to play the sport for not just him, but for Tashi too. His wife has been living vicariously through him. He’s been living for two people, taking the strain of two professional athletes combined. 

You know there had never been any point in competing with Art or Patrick, because Tashi would always love tennis the most. 

A shiver wracks your body as Art’s hand reaches for the bow that’s keeping your otherwise bare body concealed from him.

 “Can I?” His request is whined into your hair as he presses his face into the back of your head. 

Instead of answering verbally, you nudge his hand away and untie the robe yourself. Then, you take hold of both of his wrists and guide his hands onto your skin. You let out a sigh of relief when Art finally touches you the way you want him to. 

Your hands are still on him as his fingers move to cup your breasts, but he is the one guiding his movements now. He squeezes, his thumbs brushing over your nipples. 

“Art.” You rasp, pressing back into him wantonly. 

“Can I have you?” He asks, pressing open mouthed, hot kisses to your neck as he palms your breasts. “Please, let me have you.” 

“Stop fucking asking me and just do it.” 

You feel him grin against your neck just before he backs away, pulling back your robe and tugging it from your body.

The fabric has barely had time to pool at your feet when he’s grabbing you by the hips, his fingers digging in as he turns you. 

When Art’s lips finally claim yours, you moan unashamedly. His kiss is gentle but assured, you struggle for breath as he refuses to release you. Then, his hands are cupping your ass and he’s lifting you up. 

With his lips still moving hungrily against yours, Art settles you onto the edge of the bed. When he draws back, your lips chase after him and he smiles, grasping your face in his hands and giving you one more brief but searing kiss before he’s dropping to the ground.

 His hands press into your knees, forcing them apart as he begins to kiss and lick up your inner thighs. 

You prop yourself up on your elbows, watching where his mouth ravenously meets your flesh, tracing his path as he works his way closer to where you want him most.

When he reaches the top of your thigh, Art peers up at you through his long eyelashes, already looking drunk on you as he presses another kiss to your burning skin. 

“Lay back.” He instructs gently. 

But you’re too transfixed to listen- too desperate to see the moment his lips land on your core to look away.

He smiles at the realisation, delighting in your shudder as his tongue darts out and licks a line up your centre. 

“Oh my- fuck!” Your head falls back, already lost in the feeling of his mouth's devoted ministrations. 

As Art pleasures you, one of his hands skates up your stomach and gently presses down, asking rather than forcing you to lay back. This time you oblige, your eyes closed as your hands fist in the sheets. 

“You deserve so much more than I can give you.” 

You smile to yourself. Only Art could grovel as he gives so much pleasure.

Tightness begins to coil in your lower belly, but the moment he adds a teasing finger to his tongue’s movements, you realise you can’t wait. 

“Art- stop.” You gasp out, sitting up and resting your hands on his head. 

He halts immediately but doesn’t remove himself from between your legs. 

“Are you alright?” He asks, his hands rubbing soothingly along your thighs. 

“It’s not enough.” You say, tugging on his hair, trying to get him to come to you. “I need you.” 

Art doesn’t have to be asked twice, but he also doesn’t rush. He presses one last kiss to your now very sensitive folds before he’s climbing over you. 

You shuffle back, settling yourself onto the middle of the bed and even as Art takes off his clothes, he watches you. It’s as if he’s afraid that you’ll disappear if he so much as blinks. 

Now completely naked, he lays himself over you, his arms braced beside your head. He positions himself so carefully thar it’s almost as though he’s trying to fit himself to the shape of you- every divot and curve perfectly aligned sp that you’ll be fused together forever. 

As Art sweeps hair out from your face, his blue eyes bore down into you with an adoring intensity. 

You smile up at him and he rewards you by cradling your face in his hands, he lowers his head, his nose brushing yours as he gently takes your lower lip between his teeth.

Only when you understand what he wants and you open your mouth, does he kiss you again, his tongue delving in deeply.

As he seeks to consume you, your hands run down his back, squeezing his sides with your thighs. 

Art’s still kissing you as one of your hands reaches the curve of his arse, you dig your nails in and he jolts, his mouth moving away from yours and travelling down your neck. 

Tentatively, you move one hand around and down between his legs and when your hand wraps around him, he falters, his kisses stopping. 

“Is this alright?” 

Art moves again, licking the sweat slick expanse of skin between your breasts.

“Anything you do will be alright.” He assures, his lips brushing a nipple and making your back arch. 

“Do you want to have sex, Art?” You ask, barely restraining yourself.

His breaths are hot against your sensitive breasts when he answers. “Please.”

It is a joint effort as he slides inside of you. You gasp, arms wrapping around his neck as he presses kisses into yours.

Art groans as he begins to move achingly slowly, his hips rolling over yours with precision. 

You're happy like that for a few minutes, both of you revelling in your closeness after years subjected to absent desire for one another. But eventually, you want more.

You yearn for more force and luckily as you buck up into him, Art gets the message.

 As one of his hands moves behind your head, cradling it so that he can keep kissing you, the other wraps around your thigh, and pulls your leg higher over his hip, allowing himself to get even deeper. 

“You’re so beautiful.” He says in-between sloppy kisses, moving rapidly as you moan and whine. “You’ve always been so beautiful.”

Even with him inside you, making you feel more desired than anyone ever has, your mind drifts to that first night you had met him. The first night you had met Patrick. 

“You stared at Tashi.” You say.

You aren’t accusatory or upset, if anything the acknowledgement if it turns you on more. All four of you have always had a desire for the other, and it feels powerful to finally acknowledge it.

“-That night on the beach, you couldn't take your eyes off her. Neither of you could.” 

“I wanted you.” Art asserts with a particularly powerful thrust. “I- I wanted you so badly, but you went home.”

You nod, pulling him in for another kiss as you meet his thrusts. 

You understand his thinking. You’d often wondered how things might have changed had you not gone home early that night. If you’d stayed on the beach and then gone to their hotel room along with Tashi. 

Entirely content with just moving as one, you both fall silent and somehow Art curls over you even more tightly, like he wants his whole body to hide yours from the world. 

After you’ve both found your release he takes you into the shower and cleans himself off of your sensitive skin, each swipe of the washcloth accompanied by a kiss.

It ends up being time wasted though, because when you return to the bed, he takes you twice more.

━━━━∙⋆⋅⋆∙━━━━

You wake up with Art’s head resting on your bare chest. He’s laying on his side, one arm stretched out on the pillow above your head and his other hand resting on your hip. 

You’re sore in the most pleasant of ways as you sit up. You try to move slowly but Art stirs anyway, his head turning to press open mouthed kisses to your sternum. 

You rest your hand on his cheek, meaning to guide him away, but he moves so that he can kiss the palm of your hand instead. 

It’s only when you sigh into his touch, his eyes still closed as his other hand delves between your legs, that you realise why you had woken up int he first place. 

Someone was knocking on your door. 

And then you hear her voice. 

Tashi is calling out your name, sounding almost panicked.

 “Please, open the door, I know you’re in there.”

This time when you push Patrick away, he obliges, but far less quickly than you would have liked.

 In the time it takes for you to throw on your silk robe and gather up all of his clothes from the floor, he has barely got himself to stand up. He’s naked and blinking sleepily at you. 

When you shove the bundle of his clothes into his arms, he rushes to press a passionate kiss to your lips, holding the back of your head with his free hand.

You aren’t sure you want to know whether he’s truly still half asleep and genuinely hasn’t realised what is happening, or if he just doesn’t care that his wife is outside the door.

Flushed but furious at his casual demeanour, you push Art into the bathroom and close the door, just as Tashi knocks again.

 The repeated request for you to come to the door tumbles from her lips like a prayer.

You brace your hand against the door as you draw in a fortifying breath and smooth out your hair. You swear you can feel her through the door. 

The moment you open the door, Tashi is bursting in and closing it behind her. You step back, waiting for her to make the first move, for her to shout of attack or go charging into the bathroom. But she does none of those things. 

Instead, Tashi pulls you into a crushing hug. You go still, shocked but healed by it at the same time.

She pulls back, taking your face in her hands.

 “You’re a phenomenal tennis player.” Tashi says it rapturously. 

If you weren’t burning up at the feel of her hands on you, you might have laughed at how ridiculously perfect it was that those were her first words to you after over a decade. 

Tashi communicated and connected through tennis. She loved through tennis.

All you can muster is a very sincere: “Thank you.”

Tashi brushes your hair out of your face, tucking a stray piece behind your ear. You find your hands lifting, resting atop hers where they hold your cheeks.

“You need to let me coach you.” Tashi demands almost possessively.

“I have a coach.”

“They’re not me.”

“No, they’re not.”

And just like that, you were snared again. 

You had gone years without any of them, and with one word, you had allowed all three of them back into your life.

 Only this time, you know it might actually kill you if any of them leave. And perhaps it would kill them too. 

Only time would tell.

#challengers movie #art donaldson #art donaldson x reader #art donaldson x you #art donaldson smut #mike faist #patrick zweig #patrick zweig x reader #patrick zweig x you #tashi duncan #tashi donaldson #tashi x reader #zendaya #josh o'connor

[morgana-larkin]

Alright peeps! So I took a look at the poll and saw that most of you wanted the second part of 'Don't Call Me That' the most so here it is! There's everything in this one, heartbreak, angst, smut and fluff. A bit of a rollercoaster so good luck!

On another note: I'm working on part 4 of 'Mine' as that was the second most voted on. I also realise the poll is still open for another 4 hours but idc, you can still vote though!

Don't Call Me That - Part 2

Warnings: Smut, angst, lots of fluff (Not in that specific order lol), happy ending

Words: 4.2k

Melissa didn’t get any sleep last night. Everytime she closed her eyes, all she imagined was you kissing her, and nothing was on her mind except the thought of you saying you love her. You still love her, even after her breaking up with you.

Melissa walked into Abbott a little earlier, she needed extra caffeine considering she got 0 hours of sleep last night. She barely survived the day, not only from lack of sleep, but seeing you multiple times, and everytime all she thinks about is your lips on hers.

The next day she barely got any sleep, about 2 hours. The next day was the same. She thought that at least it was Friday and she could sleep in on Saturday. On Friday, everyone can clearly see the bags under her eyes as they’ve darkened over the week, and the way she can barely stay awake. Melissa thinks that it’s good her students have a test to do today and a book report coming up, and a couple other things she can get them to do instead of teaching.

At the end of the day, you go to walk to your car and you pass by Melissa’s classroom and you can see her asleep at her desk. You walk in and you see there’s no one else there, so you walk over to her and shake her a bit. “Melissa?” you say and she groans but doesn’t wake. “Melissa!” You just about yell and she opens her eyes but doesn’t move her head. You kneel down to her level and look at her. “Hey, saw you sleeping, you ok?” you ask her and she looks at you with the saddest eyes you’ve ever seen.

“Am I dreaming?” she asks you and you tilt your head.

“What makes you think you’re dreaming?” you ask her.

“Because you’re here, you wouldn’t talk to me otherwise. If I was awake then you would just avoid me because I’m an idiot.” she says and you look down and sigh.

“Ok, come on. I’ll drive you home and then you can continue dreaming ok?” you tell her and help guide her up from her chair. You take her purse with you and help guide her to your car, as well as buckle herself in as she didn’t have the strength to do it herself. “Why have you been so tired this week?” You ask as you get in the driver’s seat and start the car.

“Because I’m being haunted by my stupidity.” She says and you snort, you then back out of the parking spot and pull out of the parking lot.

“What stupidity have you done?” You ask her.

“Breaking up with my girlfriend, Y/n.” She tells you and you then realise she has no idea where she is and might still think she’s dreaming. You know you probably shouldn’t but this might be your chance to figure out what’s really going on with her.

“Why was that a stupid decision?”

“Because I still love her so much. All I think about when I try to sleep is her kissing me or her saying she loves me. I can’t do this anymore, I need her.” She says and a few tears slip. “I’ve barely slept these past 4 days, I probably got no more than 8 hours of sleep combined. I’ve barely eaten as well. I broke up with her 3 months ago and I was still able to sleep and eat, I don’t know what changed.” She says and you think about it, you should probably help her out.

“Do you feel guilty all of a sudden?” And she lets out an airy laugh.

“I’ve felt guilty ever since I thought I should break up with her?”

“Ok, so not that then. What about the fact that she told you she loves you?” You ask her and she doesn’t say anything. “Maybe you thought her feelings for you would disappear when you broke up with her cause you thought that she would just find someone else?” You tell her and she still doesn’t say anything. You thought maybe she fell asleep so you glance over at her and she’s still awake. “Melissa?” You say and she looks up at you. “Did you really break up with me because you thought I should be with someone else?” You ask her and she sighs.

“Ya.” she says and takes a deep breath. “I was holding you back from everything you’ve wanted so I let you go so I wouldn’t be in the way because I love you and I want you to be happy, even if I had to watch someone else make you happy and give you what you want.” she tells you and her eyes slowly close and she falls asleep.

The rest of the car ride, you think about what she said. You’re honestly surprised by what she said. She thought she was doing something selfless for you, but instead just ended up hurting you both, she never meant to hurt you so much. And now you see the toll it’s taken on her to stick to her decision to try and make you happy. She’s willing to sacrifice her happiness for yours, you never thought anyone would do that for you.

As soon as you pull into her driveway, you gently wake her up. “Come on Melissa, you’re home, we should gotta get you to your bed and you can sleep comfortably, ok?” You tell her and she nods. She unbuckles herself but can’t open the door fully so you do that for her. You unlock her door with her key and you help bring her inside. You set her keys and purse at the door and you close and lock her door while she attempts to take her shoes off. You end up helping her with her shoes when she falls down and you help her back up and to her room. She falls on the bed when you get there and then you tuck her in, you go to leave after but she grabs your arm and you turn to face her.

“Will you stay with me?” She asks softly and you sigh.

“Ok, but only until you fall asleep.” You tell her and she nods. You get on the bed but stay on the covers instead of under and she wraps an arm around you. You admit that you do miss this and you miss her and her craziness. You turn around to face her and she’s still awake and looking at you.

“I do want you back, y/n.” She tells you and strokes your hair.

“What’s stopping you?” You ask her and she yawns and is slowly closing her eyes.

“The fact that you won’t be happy with me.” She says and falls asleep. You stay looking at her stunned and go over everything she’s told you, thinking that you weren’t you or she was dreaming. You then slowly crawl out from her hold on you and you replace it with a pillow so she doesn’t wake up.

A few hours later Melissa wakes up. She opens her eyes and realises she’s in her bed and has no idea what happened this week that well as she’s been so tired that the whole week has been a blur. She looks at her phone and sees that it’s 5:43pm and it’s Friday. She gets out of bed and hears some noises downstairs, she then grabs her bat and carefully goes downstairs. She gets to the middle of the stair when she sees you on the couch watching tv and she tilts her head and stares for a few seconds. She then continues down the stairs and you look over at her and chuckle.

“Were you planning on hitting me with a bat? You were friendlier when you were falling in and out of consciousness.” You tease her and she looks confused. “Do you remember anything from the end of the day to how you got home?” You ask her and she stares at you then shakes her head. “I found you asleep at your desk and then I drove you home. If you want I can drive you to the school parking lot to get your car and then go home.” You tell her, you don’t want to scare her if what she said while on the verge of sleep was true.

“You drove me home?” She tells you and you nod. “W-why?”

“Because I want to make sure you didn’t fall asleep at the wheel or stay at school overnight.” You simply say. “I bet you’re hungry since you also haven’t been eating, so I made you some mac n’ cheese.” You tell her and you go and get it.

“How do you know I haven’t been eating?” She asks when you reappear with a bowl.

“Cause you told me.” You tell her when you hand it to her and sit back on the couch. “Come sit.” You say as you pat the couch cushion.

“I wouldn’t tell anyone that.” She tells you as she obeys and goes to sit beside you on the couch.

“Wow you really don’t remember anything you told me.” You say and she freezes as she was about to take a bite.

“What do you mean?” She asks and takes a bite of the food.

“I mean we had a whole conversation while you kept falling asleep. In your classroom, my car and here, at your house.”

“What did I tell you?” She asks and prepares for the worst.

“Now I don’t want you to get freaked out ok? Cause you had no idea where you were or who I really was.” You tell her and that makes her feel worse.

“Y/n. What did I tell you.”

“You told me that you still love and miss me and you want me back.” You say and her eyes go wide. “You also told me the whole reason you let me go.” You add and she drops her fork. “And why you haven’t been sleeping, and you confessed that you’ve also barely ate in the past 4 days.” You finish and she’s just staring at you. After about 10 seconds she gets up and walks to the kitchen with her mac n’ cheese and you follow after her. She puts the bowl on the counter without much thought and she puts her hands in her hair. “Melissa?” You say to get her attention and she turns around looking scared and concerned. “What’s going on with you?”

“With me? It’s the fact that you weren’t supposed to know anything that I told you.” She tells you and she’s breathing hard like she’s on the verge of either a breakdown or lots of tears.

“Why? Because I’m just supposed to be happy with someone else as you suffer?” You tell her.

“YES!” She shouts and then looks surprised when she catches up with what you told her and what she confessed. “Since I already told you then I might as well say it. All those things that you want, you won’t get with me. But you will with someone else, someone else who wants to get married, have a family with you, wants to go out and be young and stupid with you. I don’t want those things anymore, and yes I do love you very much and do want you back. But I’m willing to put aside my happiness, if it means you get everything you want.” She tells you and you burst into tears, she immediately wraps her arms around you and hugs you. Your knees buckle and she guides you both to the floor gently and she keeps her arms around you the whole time. When you get to the floor, you place your head on her chest and she brings a hand to your head and strokes it soothingly.

You slow your crying down and sniffle a few times before you speak. “I don’t deserve you. You’re willing to give me everything at the expense of your own happiness. I really don’t deserve you.” You tell her.

“No, it’s me who doesn’t deserve you. You have been the bestest friend to me for 2 years before we got together, and after we got together you have shown me the best of love and care that I could ever ask for.” She tells you, and you look up at her and immediately kiss her. She automatically kisses you back before she has time to think. Once her brain catches up to what she’s doing, she doesn’t have the willpower to pull away, she used it all trying to stay away from you. Before she can register what she’s doing, she leans forward, bringing you back until you hit the floor of the kitchen. You make out on the kitchen floor for a good minute until you both pull away for air and you look at each other. Melissa suddenly is aware of what she did and she gets up before you could stop her and she scurries to the living room, you run after her.

“Melissa, would you stop running away from me!” You tell her and she’s turned away from you with her head down.

“You should leave y/n.” Is all she says and you walk up to her and spin her around.

“If you want me to leave then tell me while looking at me.” You say and she raises her eyes to your face and she’s crying.

“I can’t.” She says and you put your hands on her cheeks and wipe the tears away.

“Melissa, I want to be with you. If being with you means that I don’t get married, have kids or go to the bar every now and then with you then so be it. Because I’m only wanting to marry the right person, and that person is you. So if I’m with you or not, I’m not getting married. I don’t need kids to feel fulfilled, or to be able to say I have a family. I mean we can always get a pet like a dog, but you’re all the family I need. And I can go to the bars with my friends and be young and stupid with them from time to time if I really want.” You tell her and she starts crying even more.

“You shouldn’t have to sacrifice everything just to be with me.”

“Melissa, it’s not a sacrifice if what I’m getting is a life with you.” You tell her and you kiss her. Melissa immediately pulls back and looks at you, her hands on your head.

“Are you sure? You have to be 100% sure y/n.” She tells you and you think it over for all of 2 seconds and you nod your head.

“I’m 100% sure, I want to be with you Melissa.” You tell her and she smiles.

“I want to be with you too.” She says and this time she goes to kiss you. The kiss deepens and you start putting your hands all over her and you think you want to touch her skin and she’s wearing too much clothes, so you put your hands under her shirt. Melissa immediately pulls her shirt off so you can touch her and you unclip her bra and take it off. She’s always been the dominant one but at this moment, all you want to do is kiss her all over, so you walk forward until her back hits a wall and you go down to her neck and kiss and suck all over and she’s gasping under you. You then travel down to her chest and leave kisses all over until you attach your mouth to her nipples and start to suck and lick them. 

She’s bucking her hips under you and you know she’s not far away from pulling all her clothes off herself and guiding you inside of her. You’re working on her second nipple when she pushes you off and guides you to your knees. You go immediately into submissive like always and you pull her pants and underwear off. Melissa leans back against the wall and spreads her legs a little further so you can put your mouth there.

You attach your mouth to her clit and she starts bucking her hips right away and you pin her to the wall. Her hands go to your hair and she’s gasping and moaning at your touch. “Oh god, Y/n, that feels so good baby.” She says and when you know she’s getting close, you pull away and stand up. You push your body into hers and immediately insert two fingers in her and put your thumb on her clit. “God Y/N, I missed you so much.” She says and kisses you. She’s so close as she starts shaking but she doesn’t pull away from your lips like she usually does, you aren’t complaining though, you missed her as well and you’re enjoying kissing her again.

She comes not long after she starts shaking but you don’t stop, you keep fingering her and circling her clit and she lets out a high pitched gasp. “Oh god baby, yes, omg, don’t stop.” She says as she pulls away from your lips and gives into the over sensitivity.

She comes again not too long after the first and then you withdraw your fingers and put them in your mouth to lick them. She looks at you as you lick your fingers and you moan and that’s when she takes action. She picks you up and brings you to the couch, you’re so glad that she decided to remove the plastic as this wouldn’t be comfortable. She put you so you’re sitting in the middle with your back resting on the back of the couch. She starts kissing and sucking your neck and pulls your shirt off. She unclips your bra and yanks it off  right after then immediately brings her mouth to a nipple. You’re moaning and gasping under her and she smiles as she’s so happy that she’s back with you, she’s fully aware of how lucky she is right now and she won’t take it for granted. She takes more time on your nipples then she usually does and your patience is running thin as you’re dripping wet and you have a strong ache between your legs. 

“Melissa, please, I need you inside of me, please.” You tell her and she pulls back from your chest and smiles at you. She gives a quick kiss on your lips then leaves a trail of kisses from your chest all the way to the top of your pants. She quickly removes your pants and underwear, spreads your legs, leaves a few kisses on each thigh and then attaches her mouth to your entrance. You gasp as soon as her hot wet tongue is where you need her the most and she starts moving her tongue all over your entrance before entering her tongue in you. You moan as she starts sliding her tongue in and out of you and you're holding onto her hair for dear life. You start grinding into her mouth to try and get more friction so you can come and for once she lets you keep doing it, normally she would pin you down when you start grinding. Even in the middle of amazing pleasure, that fact is not lost on you, you notice it immediately then start to think of everything else she’s done differently. 

She kept kissing you when she was about to come and even when she came, when she usually pulls away as you love to hear her when she comes. She let you keep fingering her after she came and it seemed like she needed it as well, she only lets you make her come once as she usually ends up grinding your thigh when fingering you as she loves to watch you and it turns her on. She spent more time on your nipples then she usually does, to the point that you begged her to continue, and now letting you grind against her mouth. You put it all together and came to the conclusion, she’s letting you do whatever you want and making sure you feel good as she feels guilty. You reluctantly pull her mouth away and she looks at you confused,

“What is it baby?” She asks and her lips and chin is covered in your juices.

“Stop doing things differently, you don’t have to feel guilty ok. I feel really special about why you did what you did. No one has ever been willing to sacrifice their own happiness for mine.” You tell her and she smiles shyly.

“Of course, I’d do anything for you.” She tells you and you lean in closer to her.

“Then stop fucking me differently and start being yourself again.” You tell her and something flickers in her eyes before she pushes your head back to lean on the back of the couch then dives down to your clit and starts licking and sucking on it. Your fingers are still in her hair and you start grinding against her again, but this time she does pin your hips down. Then she does something she’s never done before, she snakes her hands around your hips and hooks her hands on your ass then pulls you up a bit and that gives her a perfect angle with your clit and you gasp her name out as you come.

She then immediately comes up and positions herself so her clit is on your thigh and she slides a finger in you and you moan as she starts sliding it in and out of you slowly. She then adds two more fingers and starts going faster while her thumb is on your clit and she brings her mouth near your ear.

“Unfortunately the strap is upstairs and I don’t have the patience to go get it, so we’ll have to make do with my fingers.” she says then adds a fourth and you cry out.

“OH MY GOD!!” You cry out as she fills you up with her fingers then her mouth goes to your neck and so much pleasure is coursing through you right now and you feel like moving but her grinding on your thigh is preventing you from doing that. So you do something else that will help stabilise you, you put your hands on her boobs and squeeze them. You don’t feel like that’s enough so you wrap an arm around her back and pull her into you more.

“Ooo” She says as she’s caught off guard by your actions. You come again about 5 seconds later and she doesn’t stop, she just keeps going until you come again and again and then you pull her away.

“Melissa, I can’t take anymore.” You tell her and she nods and gently pulls each finger out at a time. 

“Sorry I got lost in the moment.” She tells you and you smile but your body is shaking from the amount of times you came. She notices and then goes to your side and brings you both to lay down while she cuddles you to give your body the chance to calm down. You turn around in her arms then nuzzle your head on her neck and chest and she holds you tighter. “It’s ok baby, I got you, and I don’t plan on going anywhere again.” She tells you and you only nod as you’re falling asleep. She notices that you fell asleep and she gently strokes your hair. “I promise I won’t leave you again.” She whispers to you. “I won’t make that mistake again.” She says and presses a kiss to your forehead.

*3 years later*

You and Melissa are both standing in front of the house as you unlock it then Melissa grabs your waist before you walk in and she pushes the door open.

“What are you doing Mel?” You ask her as you’re smiling at her and she smiles at you.

“Well shouldn’t I carry my bride across the threshold?” She asks you and then picks you up bridal style and you let out a small squeal and then she carries you inside then gently puts you down. She wraps her arms around your waist and you lean into her touch and she puts lays her chin on your shoulder. You both then hold out your left hands and smile at the ring on both your third finger.

Melissa kisses your neck and then your puppy comes running in and Kristen Marie running after her. You and Melissa decided to adopt a little puppy a few months ago and you both are really happy with your lives now. Melissa re-thought her decision about getting married and proposed to you a year and a half ago, much to your surprise. Then you both agreed on adopting a dog and Melissa named her Bella. Kristen Marie takes Bella out one more time before leaving her with you guys. 

“Are you still alright with the fact that we got married?” You ask her.

“Oh, it’s more than alright baby. Cause I got to marry you, my happily ever after.” She tells you and you both kiss.

Taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta

@imaginesmultifandoms

@idonothingalldays-blog

@sexysapphicshopowner

@dvrkhcld

@lilfartbox1

@ricejucie

@unicorniusfallapatorius

Let me know if you want to be added!

#melissa schemmenti x reader #melissa schemmenti x oc #melissa schemmenti x you #melissa schemmenti #x reader #fanfic #abbott elementary

[strqyr]

genuine question: do people want bad, inconsistent writing? is that it? because that's the only way "taiyang is and always has been a horrible father and yang had to raise ruby all on her own and she resent him for it" makes any damn sense.

like. where's the resentment?

where is yang, while happy that ruby is one step closer to achieving her lifelong dream, feeling just slightly frustrated that she's once again sharing a room with her sister, when going to beacon was supposed to be a place just for her for at least two years without having to watch after ruby and feel guilty over it?

where's the resentment when tai sent zwei to the girls to be taken care of while he's away on a mission, placing that responsibility on yang again? why show yang instead being flippant about the whole ordeal, and shrugging it off like it's nothing, being ready to leave zwei alone in the dorm room for the week they're away because he has the absurd amount of food and a can opener tai provided them?

where's yang bringing up how she had to apparently grow up early because tai wasn't there, when she wanted to be treated like an adult?

where's the resentment when yang was about to leave home under the assumption it was her keeping her father from going after ruby, only to find out he isn't coming with her, once again leaving the responsibility of taking care of ruby on her shoulders?

because the show i watched, it doesn't exist. to even remotely get to that point you'd have to ignore ruby talking about their dad in a way that makes it clear he was present and raising them, you'd have to ignore yang having to wait for him to be out of the house to leave herself once again proving he was present and attentive of them, you'd have to ignore ruby's first happy memory being from that same time period (and with no corresponding sad memory to counter it), you'd have to ignore him reading them bedtime stories and taking them out for boba after school, making sure he's spending time with them even when he's busy with work.

you'd have to ignore that both yang and ruby have a good relationship with their father.

that is not to say tai doesn't have his flaws—every damn character in this show does—, but that's exactly what V4 is about. the rift that existed between yang and taiyang was his refusal to talk about raven and doing his best to prevent her from looking for her. that's it. just compare the difference in tone between yang's "oh, so now we can talk about her?" and "i don't know. some things you just need to be there for." and it's clear as a day where the resentment actually lies.

therein lies the core of the arc between yang and tai, and like many issues between characters in this show, it gets resolved: for the first time ever, he properly talks with yang about raven, and when yang is about to leave, he doesn't try to stop her like he has before; instead, he asks her where she's going, and gives information that might help make her journey easier.

if they intended there to be any lingering resentment from yang, 'boba' was not the way to do it. we know what yang's resentment looks like: anger, snappiness, the like. it's not quiet, almost somber.

they could have written yang treating tai's absence in vacuo as something she has come to expect from him, but they didn't; instead, she wonders why, because she can't fathom what could be more important for their father than being there, in vacuo, with them.

and that alone comes as validation for everyone who has wondered the same: why is tai staying in patch when everyone else is on the move? this is a character we're first properly introduced to as a father who has fallen asleep by his daughter's bedside waiting for her to wake up, a father who is almost brought to tears by relief that both of his daughters are back home and safe.

a father we last saw being absolutely desperate for his daughter to come back on screen when ruby's message cut short.

and beyond brings a sledgehammer and says yes, it is odd that taiyang hasn't left home to be by his daughters' side. wonder why that is, must be something important, wink wink ;)

and if you ask me, that sounds like a pretty damn good "long con", and damn good writing.

#rwby #taiyang xiao long #yang xiao long #ruby rose #the disrespect this family gets smh #make it make sense folks!!!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for asking my (36F she/her) girlfriend (32F she/they) to be out at work if she wants to become myanager ?

It's messy and complicated. I love my girlfriend very much and ultimately I think we are in a shitty situation with no real win and we have a different opinions on how to lose.

I am a polyamorous lesbian. I have a wife but I also sometimes have other secondary partners, and my wife does too.

I am happy to work in a place safe enough that I am out at work (about the lesbian part, not the polyamory part). My wife often comes at afterwork events and because she is a sweetheart, is loved by most of my colleagues.

I have been at this job for 4 years, that's how I met this colleague, Angel. This person looked familiar but I couldn't put my finger on it. We talked, grew a bit closer then I met them again outside of work, at a queer event of my city. This time I recognized them. Angel is trans, non binary and fem presenting, at work she is not out and present herself as a cis heterosexual man. We talked, I obviously swore to keep it a secret but knowing this part of her helped us growing even closer together. We have now been dating for 3 years.

Angel has a longtime girlfriend (childhood sweethearts even) as her primary relationship. Let's call her Valentine. Valentine is working in the same industry but not in the same company. Because it's a niche field, everyone knows everyone and we often meet at work events. I also like her very much and we are good friends. Val is terrified to be out as polyamori at work because she is afraid of what the gossip will do to her work reputation. Valentine has a more public facing role than Angel and I and I absolutely respect her desire to protect what she has.

Even if it doesn't look like it, I do like too to keep private and professional life separated… Angel and I mostly connected outside of the workplace at queer events and are also both deeply involved in the drag scene and the queer political scene of our city. We never flirted at work and have even never stole a kiss on workground. We just happened to fall in love anyway even if we recognized the situation was less than ideal.

Our company has been through a lot of changes recently. My teamleader is leaving and Angel(that previously worked in another department) has been asked if she wants the role.

She does.

I have more experience than her even if she has more seniority with the company. I have been pretty open about wanting a senior expert position rather than managerial one and that's why I have not been offered the role. I am really happy for her and think she will be a great manager and recognize it's a great opportunity.

But I don't want her to be My manager. It's a really dangerous position to have over a romantic partner and she recognizes that. Moreover even if we managed to keep our relationship a secret until now, we know it's a precarious position. If our secret would be revealed while she IS my manager it could be terrible for us. She could be accused of taking advantage of me, or me to want to sleep my way through the top. Keep also in mind that she is male presenting at work and I am publicly a lesbian so yeah… We are also in very committed relationship which is another mess… It would not look good for us should we be forcibly out…

That's why I want to go to HR while her candidacy is being studied and explains the whole thing or at least some of them. I don't want to leave my team because my mentor is there and not a lot of people are doing what we do but maybe we could sort something out together? I would agree for Angel to be the team leader if I have a separate manager… Or maybe Angel could be the leader of another team ? Or I could become a more independent team member ? Angel and I are publicly work best friends so it would made sense anyway for me to have a different manager to keep things more fair.

Angel doesn't want to, and Valentine is absolutely against it. Angel thinks it will ruin her chance at the position. Maybe want to sort things out After she has been offered the job, maybe try to work out how we would work at manager/managee for some time before calling HR. I would not be against waiting for a real offer but listening her talk, I am afraid she intends to push things forever. Angel is afraid HR will reveal our secret to everyone. I recognize our HR team is not the best and even gossipy but it's about really private and protected things (in my country) : our sexual orientation and sexual identities. We also have a very good Union (with queer delegates) and even if I am unsure about HR, I am sure the union will remember them the law protecting us here and will ultimately behave appropriately. But I recognized it's a risk.

I want to break things of with Angel if she doesn't want to go to HR. My wife says it's mean and manipulative to use this kind of ultimatum. The way I see it I am just protecting myself. Angel is putting her job before our relationship and I am OK with that, she is also priorizing Valentine's needs (as she should) but in this case, I should be allowed to do the same and protect myself and my job. From my point of view, Angel could : refuse the position, go to HR, or accept the breakup.

AITA for this ultimatum ? Valentine thinks I am. Angel is confused. My wife disapproves but loves me to much to call me an asshole.

#aita #am i the asshole

[deerlottie]

OKAY, SO, I DON'T THINK ANYONE HAS ASKED THIS BUT- HCS of proposing to the yjs? Like, would they propose or would reader propose. Also, how they would do it dhhshdhan

lottie: FOR SUREEEE she would be the one proposing. i think she'd try sooo hard to be subtle, but you know in an instant because she's so fucking nervous 😭 also didn't hide the ring that well...it'd be on a trip to greece - idk the first thing that came to mind was a little sunset picnic by the beach near ur hotel, little makeout session which turns into her getting emotional and pulling out the ring. she'd go on a monologue for like 10 minutes about how lucky she is to have met you and be with you and wake up every day to kiss you :( I feel like she'd just love a quaint little wedding with all your guys' friends and some family. doesn't have to be huge but if that's something you want, shes more than happy to oblige.

jackie: YOU WOULD! her ass would be dropping hints that she's ready for marriage and would get SO excited when you make up the worst lie when you're going with shauna to go ring shopping LMFAO. you have to wait until she forgets about it because she's on edge Every Day. i think she'd LOVE the attention if you do it in public... telling her you wanna go on a simple walk and she starts to realize you're taking her to where you guys went on your first date :( proposing to her at the exact table you sat at too 😭😭 ohh she'd be a mess. it'd take her like 5 mins to stop crying and say yes.

shauna: she would!!!!! this is probably cliche and corny as hell but i can't stop thinking about her saying she bought you a book because it reminds her of you and when you open it, inside is a poem she wrote about how she feels about you :( she includes lines from her favorite books and at the end of poem is "please say yes." you're confused but she tells you to flip to the last page and there's a ring. she's holding her breath for what seems like forever until you say yes and shes so happy :(( tbh i can see her just wanting to get married secretly and the girls finding out about it when they see that huge ass ring she got you.

nat: you'd propose. but i could also see her being kind of upset she can't afford an actual ring for you so she gets you like a ring from one of those quarter machines or some shit 😖😭 but its soo sweeet. she actually pours her little heart out and maybe cries a little...(she'll kill u if u mention this to anyone) but as for you, a simple dinner proposal is just fine. doesn't even have to be fancy - it could be a pizza shop you two frequent a lot and she'd be content. you'd do it in such a cheesy (no pun intended) way tho 😭 "accidentally" dropping your fork and asking her to pick it up for you and when she's bent down, that's where you place the ring on her plate. she scoffs but she's so enamored >__< will also flaunt that ring like there's no tomorrow!!!!

taissa: she would :P she told you very early on in ur relationship that you shouldn't even THINK about proposing because she's gonna be the one to do it. im such a sucker for halloween/christmas themed proposals so im imagining her doing it with christmas lights and ur too busy staring at how pretty she looks to notice the letters spelling out something when you help her put them up. thinking of the word "you" not lighting up properly so it just spells out "will marry me?" and you're like HUH!!!!! but ofc you say yes, and she gets you the most jaw-droppingly gorgeous ring ever that matches with a necklace she bought for herself :(

van: they would!!!! im obsessed with the idea of them doing it in a movie theater 😭 using their connections to have it display "y/n, will you marry me?" during the end credits of a movie you went to go see. and you HATE staying for the credits, so it takes a Lot of begging from van to get you to sit ur ass back down. the lights turning into a warm red color and van's VIBRATING beside you with a huge grin on their face as their message pops up. Trust that the ring box would be themed to fit your guys' favorite movie like the little nerd they are.

misty: oh, she would...if it was acceptable, she would've proposed one week into your relationship. caligula would 100% be involved. when you arrive at misty's house, caligula is carrying a note in her beak telling you to meet misty at the park. you walk around with her for a while and feed the ducks with her until she takes you by this totally not suspicious guy who's playing romantic songs on his guitar, which definitely sounds like ur favorite song....she gets down on her knees dramatically before proposing 😭

#.myworks #yellowjackets thoughts 💭 #yellowjackets x reader #lottie matthews x reader #jackie taylor x reader #natalie scatorccio x reader #shauna shipman x reader #taissa turner x reader #van palmer x reader #misty quigley x reader

[blitz0hno]

The reason the line "Happy or sad, why decide?" From Tear Drop sticks out to me is because it really does highlight Yuno's disdain for pity and projection

Sometimes people who think they are "empathetic" are just really stuck in projection without realizing, which is why ppl like "dArK EmPaThS" etc. use their fawning trauma as an excuse to be judgy assholes.

Like a sort of "If I was in that situation..." So like even if they Understand the Emotions they're still seeing it from THEIR pov, THEIR life experience and not the other person's.

And like. I keep thinking about how, if I want to live authentically, it's always gonna be blatantly obvious I have trauma.

But like. EVERYONE has some degree of trauma, it came free w your late stage capitalism and your parents being as dumb and scared as you are/neu i am talking like BIG picture here.

Like you can be bummed stuff happens to ppl and like bear it in mind if conflict gets difficult, but me and my system mates do NOT need pity, unsolicited advice, to be assumed attention seeking or untrustworthy etc.. I don't have bad intentions but plenty of people do so I have a survival mechanism for that. I play it close to the chest. So fucking what? Why does life have to get so complicated so fast, but we as people are expected to be simple? I can't even decide if I want to tell people what name I truly am In the moment. Sometimes I feel 35, at a time in my life when I'll be grateful if the earth is still here in my mid-twenties. I've done almost nothing and feel the weight of everything and I don't see a place for judgement in a world like that unless someone does something TRULY heinous. Preying on others, hoarding resources, abuse etc.. So who cares how I am living and getting by? Why do I have to be secretive about something that's not hurting anyone? "Good" or "bad," there are assumptions attached to my circumstances that I am not happy with at all.

This isn't like a vent or anything I just think that system or not, Yuno is in a similar predicament. She Knows she should not have to feel shame, but she does. It has been placed on her for years, so she rejects it entirely and seeks to empower herself. Living as she pleases and being a boss bitch yeah, but still having these delicate feelings that are just too complex for many people.

I feel like everyone feels that way about something

#tw existentialism #?? maybe #yuno milgram #yuno kashiki #my beloved #this is more abt me than her but I WILL dedicate a post to her EVENTUALLY i just wanna do her justice #milgram #i love milgram

[kajaono]

Anthony projecting his feelings for Kate on Edwina and how the show beautifully reveals this mistake later on

Intro: I already made a post about how amazing the after-failed-wedding scene is, and how Anthony is projecting his feelings for Kate on Edwina to still save the wedding, but i want to dig deeper into it this time. Stick with me here and excuse the horrible smartphone screenshots.

Anthony comes up the Edwina, trying to convience her to still marry him, saying: "What we share is greater than else."

Edwina doesn't seem convienced. She knows it is a lie, a lie Anthony might not even be aware of himself.

Anthony then proceeds:

You can see how sad, broken and tierd Edwina looks after this speech. Because... yeah the share a fate, a fate they didn't choose for themselves. But Edwinas is not necessarily a bad one. Its a privilege, the "once in a life time"-chance to find a husband and save her whole family. Yeah it is not easy, but it will be over at the end of the season. Can you compare it with being a Vicount? A title that makes him head of the family... forever! A title that makes him responsible for his whole family. A fate where is own happiness is always second, and his family always comes first. Can you compare that with being a diamond for one season?... I don't think so, Anthony.

And still... still, Anthony tries to frame it like his and Edwinas fates are alike. And i think he really believes it there. He really does. Because, yes, he indeed shares a fate with a Sharma sister... just not this one.

And now the pre-sex-scene kicks in.

First at all, Anthony confronts Kate with: "Before we both finally do something for ourselves?". A really beautiful moment and already paralleling his moment with Edwina.

Because when Anthony utters these words you can see how Kate realize he is right. She has never done anything for herself, because she was always head of the family. Her family needs were always first, her own needs always came second. A fate she didn't choose for herself (you already see where this is going, don't you?)

Kate immedietly confirms Anthonys words. Everything she did was for her family. Like a certain Vicount perhaps?

And Anthony understands. Oh yes, he does!

Because, just like Kate he always took care of his family first. A fate he didn't choose for himself.

Wait, we heard that before!

And this is how the circle closes. Beautiful, isn't it?

This whole speech that he shared with Edwina, was never for her. It was always dedicated to Kate. He is just so deep in denial that he got a few things mixed up...

#anthony bridgerton #kanthony #edwina sharma #bridgerton #bridgerton season 2 #bridgerton parallels #whoopsie forgot to post that. but here you finally go

[icedragonlizard]

Headcanons for Susie's birthdays

HAPPY 8TH ANNIVERSARY FOR KIRBY: PLANET ROBOBOT!!!!!!

AND ALL THE CHARACTERS THAT DEBUTED IN THE GAME, INCLUDING SUSANNA PATRYA HALTMANN!!!!!

I have headcanons for what Susie's birthdays are like throughout her life... Planet Robobot's anniversary is the perfect day to post them!

Susie experienced a massive deprivation of birthday celebrations. A large chunk of her life, her birthdays weren't even celebrated at all.

During the first several years of her life, her beloved father was there to celebrate little Susie's birthdays and spoil her rotten with presents. It was such a wonderful time for her. She loved every minute of it....

.... But that never happened ever again after she got sucked into the portal that sent her to Another Dimension. That changed it all forever.

That marks the beginning of Susie's birthdays going completely uncelebrated for a very long time. There was no way for her birthdays to be celebrated during her time in Another Dimension. Her father wasn't around to do it anymore. There was literally no other lifeform in Another Dimension that was willing to wish her a happy birthday... Susie didn't encounter anything aside from predatory sphere doomers that were ready to attack her time and time again.

Man, it would've helped out SO MUCH if she encountered Magolor at that place.

Susie tried to self-celebrate her first birthday in Another Dimension, but it felt very empty to do so. It didn't feel nearly the same as when her father was there to help celebrate it with her, and it didn't really did anything to cheer herself up because she was still utterly miserable to be stuck in this hell dimension. It was all-around tragic.

She was forced to concede to not having her birthdays receive any sort of celebration whatsoever for a long time. It was hard on her. She was spoiled so hard by everything her father did for her when she was little, it emotionally destroyed her to have all of that be forcibly taken away from her. She was deprived of so many things after she got banished to Another Dimension. She was robbed of so, so much.

She was stuck in that place for more than a decade. She's had to go that long without any birthday celebrations. That's... that's so long.

And to make matters worse, it didn't even stop there! When Susie finally escaped Another Dimension to see her dad again, her birthdays still weren't getting celebrated at all. The deprivation went on for even longer! On top of her dad not remembering her being his daughter at all and refusing to accept hugs from her, it would come as no surprise that he also didn't bother celebrating her birthdays at that point. He simply didn't have the emotional attachment to do so.

He didn't even celebrate his own birthdays anymore after Star Dream ate his mind.

It got to the point where Susie just saw her birthday as something insignificant. She was already used to not having it celebrated at all after being stuck in Another Dimension for so long, and so she just gave up on the mere idea of her birthday completely when her senile father couldn't be arsed to do anything for it. Everything that happened to Susie had eventually conditioned her into not caring about her birthday. That's what happens when one gets so deprived.

However... things change after the events of Planet Robobot, when Susie's father dies, and she makes friends for the first time in forever.

At one point, Kirby asked Susie when her birthday was. He was curious to know. Susie reluctantly answered. She told him what her birthday was, but by that point she didn't care about her birthday anymore. She said to him that she didn't celebrate it at all and didn't even see the point in doing so, since she has no family to celebrate it.

That response made Kirby sad. He's a little guy with an enormous heart. He cares so much about his friends, that's why he asks about their birthdays because he really wants to do something for them.

A lot of things about Susie made Kirby really sad after they became friends. Even just losing her father was sad enough for him, but she had even told him some of her tragic story which absolutely broke his heart. He's came to see just how deprived she was of so many things. That she broke down crying when he gave her a hug for the first time was proof of deprivation of hugs. That she went through so many birthdays uncelebrated is also proof of deprivation. Just... uggghhhh!

She didn't deserve that. She deserved so much better than that, Kirby thought. He wanted to do something for Susie when her birthday finally came around. He felt like he had to! And so he did.

Who's to say that your birthdays can't also be celebrated by people that aren't family?

At one point, when Susie's birthday came up, she got met with something she never expected to see. It shocked her beyond belief.

Kirby, Taranza and Magolor arranged a surprise birthday party for her. Those were her three main friends at the time, and it seemed like they all cared enough to do something when her special came up.

Susie finally experiences celebration for her birthdays again. After well over a decade of literally zero celebration, it comes rushing at her like a train. These three people literally went out of their way to help Susie try to feel like her birthday meant something once again.

... At first, she didn't know how to respond. She was completely speechless as she was caught by total surprise at them doing this.

But then it reminded her of when her father celebrated her birthdays back when she was a little kid, and how much she loved that. Was it.... was it seriously that long ago when her birthday saw any sort of celebration? It.... it was. It was. And here it is, it's happening again.

Susie couldn't help it. After this pondering, she grew extremely emotional over this surprise party. She breaks down crying. Her emotions were all over the place during this party. It's not usual of her to do this, but she rushed to give hugs to Kirby, Taranza and Magolor to thank them for doing this. She didn't ask them to arrange a surprise birthday for her... they were under no obligation to do this, but they fact they chose to do it anyway made her emotions go crazy.

It meant the world to her that they did this.

They continued arranging these birthday parties for her over the years afterwards. And at some point, it no longer became just Kirby, Magolor and Taranza that were celebrating Susie's birthdays. The three Mage Sisters joined in on this after Susie became close enough friends with them to where they were interested in doing things for her birthday, too. There was a total of six people doing this for Susie.

Even after her first birthday party, she still finds herself getting really emotional at many of the following ones. After not having these for so long, it means absolutely everything to her that these happen. It makes her feel like an excited little kid when her friends come by to do this for her when the day comes each year. She loves it so much.

Susie cherishes these parties happening for her birthdays.

She's been having to relearn and unlearn a lot things after detaching herself from emotions for a long time. Post-Robobot is the best time for her, tbh. Her dad may be gone, and she's been really hurt by his death, but now she has friends that really care about her. They're the best thing to ever happen to her. Because of them, she's been starting to realize what it's like to feel loved again. That life will be okay.

Her friends are the reason she's been able to heal from her past trauma. They've thrown things at her like love, comfort, hugs, and giving her celebration during her birthdays. And after having none of that for so long, she slowly softens up as a person over time after getting all of this once again. She really needed all this, didn't she?

After what she's been through, this sort of thing was long overdue.

Susie... is still certainly not the most emotional person around. A lot of the time, she's still kind of stoic. And she doesn't have a lot of friends, as she's still not very open to making a bunch of them. But she really cherishes the friends that she DOES have, and they can easily elicit emotion out of her sometimes. Honestly, she's not sure what she would do without them. They've done so much for her.

Thanks to them, her birthday is a day of happiness and joy for her. After that not being the case for so long, they turn it around for her.

Going to give a special shout-out to Taranza, because he is Susie's closest friend. And he also does something peculiar in each of her birthdays: every time her party is over and the rest of her friends go home, he stays for a little bit. He and Susie have some heartfelt talks, and he makes sure she gets her barrage of tight comfy bear-hugs for her birthday. Susie loves Taranza's hugs. She loves how soft and fuzzy he is, and him having 6 arms adds on to the comfiness that she feels from his hugs. Over the years, he's been really good at comforting her, both emotionally and physically. Susie cherishes him a bunch.

Kirby, Magolor and the Mage Sisters all deserve a thanks as well. They, along with Taranza, are the ones that help Susie relearn the special meaning of her birthdays. She's gotten back something she lost here. And it's a really wonderful thing for her. She deserved this.

Happy birthday, Susie!

#kirby #susie haltmann #susie kirby #kirby susie #susanna patrya haltmann #kirby planet robobot #planet robobot #max haltmann #max profitt haltmann #star dream #robobot armor #haltmann works company #taranza #magolor #the mage sisters

[heavenlymorals]

(Warning: There are mentions of sexism in this post because I refuse to not acknowledge the time these people were living in and what that entails for men and women.)

The saddest thing about the Arthur and Mary romance is that it didn't happen because they were plagued by the same problem- family in 1800s America and what that entailed for men and women.

In Arthur's case, it was more obvious. He felt he had a debt to the gang, a debt he could never pay back- to Dutch and Hosea, his father figures who saved him, to the men he saw as brothers in arms, to the women he had to take care of and loved, and he could never for once think for a moment that he could also be kind to himself. Arthur Morgan, a strong man, a provider, a protector, someone that people NEEDED. Never once did people in the game ask Arthur what HE wants. It's always about their needs, and Arthur, being who he is, a selfless person to selfish people, would slave away to the ends of the Earth, to hell and back, just to be that pillar that they see him as, for Arthur Morgan is a man who had the world on his shoulders and couldn't, not even once, think about giving that responsibility to another man. He never could. His family consumed him to where his truest self, his most authentic self came only in the thin pages of a leather journal and the voice of lead. His family consumed him and the love he had for Mary, this want to have for once, something truly to himself, was inconceivable. How could he leave them? How? He couldn't. No matter how much he may want to, he just can't.

For Mary? Her family consumed her long ago, as soon as she was born, for she committed the cardinal sin of being born a woman in the 1800s. Whatever ambitions she had, they were impossible. The world made her horribly dependent from the moment she was born. Her prospects was being a lady, knowing department, and securing a marriage for the sake of her family and herself, otherwise, more likely than not, she will be thrusted into poverty or shame or both. And then she met Arthur and he showed her a world beyond the gilded age and she was happy because this love she had for him was her own and her experiences were ones that she wanted, not that her family wanted. She was happy with him, so terribly happy, but her dependence on her family crushed her- socially, economically, culturally. So when her family forced her to marry Mr. Linton, she agreed and forsaked her own love because how could she abandon her family? Her elopement would shame them and make her a disgrace to her sex.

They were both trapped by their families for different reasons but in the end, they decide to put themselves first and it was already too late.

When Mary called for Arthur, it wasn't for him and if it was, she masked it up by asking him for help with her family, the family that she forsaked everything for because how could she not? And Arthur helped. By God, he helped. Not necessarily because he wants to, but that's what love has done to him. It made him the one work stallion out of many who will one day be put down by sheer exhaustion of the weight on its back and the reward of very little. And Arthur would leave and go back to the gang, because how could he leave them?

But after years of abuse, loss of personhood, and the struggles of being a woman in 1800s America, Mary decides to be selfish. She saw how her father saw her as truly less than nothing when he decided to sell a broach that belonged to her beloved mother and then to be passed on to her. All that suffering she went through meant nothing because her father has shamed the family she tried so hard to keep happy and her brother was off to college and was no longer held on by the shackles of the wayward patriarch, Mr. Gillis. She decides to be selfish and asks Arthur to run away with her, so she can finally make do on that proposal long ago to be together, married and happy.

But Arthur then makes the same decision she made all those years ago when he proposed to her. He chooses his family. They need him, but maybe now it's finally over? He can pay his debt to them, have them live happy and free, and then chase his own happiness, his own treasure in the image of a wonderful and beautiful creature by the name of Mary Linton- and maybe in the future, Mary Morgan. After over 20 years- maybe he can be selfish.

But when he realized that these people that he dedicated his life to were draining him of life and hopes and dreams and gave him nothing in return but more troubles, it was too late.

He couldn't let go of these people who ruined him and Mary realized this. Her final letter was a heartfelt goodbye because as she finally broke free of those binds that tied her, Arthur didn't or couldn't. He made the same mistake as she did all those years ago and she couldn't handle such heartbreak anymore, for their souls were slaves to them who didn't deserve it.

And when Arthur finally did break free of those soulful chains, of those people who he loved so deeply, it was too late. Sickness turned a strong man to a husk and as he choked on his blood, he could only get solace from the fact that he tried. He tried to be his authentic self, he tried to be his own man with his own actions, he tried to be good, he tried to change, he tried, and his reward?

Choking and gasping on his blood due to actions in the past he never wanted to do but did anyways because the people he loved asked him to and he just couldn't say no.

Both Mary and Arthur loved each other. Fully and deeply but as their souls were entwined, their bodies and minds were held in bondage by a man's duty to protect and provide and a woman's duty of deportment and honor to families who ruined them. Both of them expect the other to forsake their family for them, but neither of them could do that at the correct time together.

All that remains of that love, true and pure, is Mary's ring on another woman's finger through her wish that Arthur could give the ring to another couple who weren't trapped in the same duty that they were, and that if they were, they had the strength to be selfish.

What a sad, sad story of two poor souls, Arthur Morgan and Mary Linton.

#arthur morgan #mary linton #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 #character analysis #story analysis #they make me so sad #they truly did love eachother #but it was never destined to happen due to the duties they had from both their sex #and their “duties” to their families #when they finally decided to be selfish and for once put themselves first instead of their family #it was already too late #😭😞

[dasinclair]

I see you ship Cecil/Debbie…

Any head cannons for them?

yes of course

so... i do think they're sort of "doomed in every universe" in that they can never really be together and they know that. debbie deserves better and they both know that. maybe they're a little afraid of the idea that they could be happy together. they know what they're feeling but they can't ever say it

HOWEVER debbie and cecil are very, very good at reading each other. they can have entire lengthy conversations through eye movement alone

cecil greatly admires debbie's strength and he also sees a bit of himself in her, especially after nolan's betrayal. he knows what it's like to carry so much pain that you deny yourself happiness and he just wants to take some of that burden off her

also she is of course the most beautiful woman he has ever seen in his life. but he tries not to think about that

debbie telling cecil she's always hated him isn't quite true. she HAS been deeply conflicted about him for a long time, yes. but she was (rightfully) angry, and she knew saying that would hurt him, and she can be a little vindictive when she wants to be

...and that's something cecil likes about her. not a lot of things can affect him like she does. she isn't afraid of saying whatever she wants to him, often things he needs to hear. kinda makes him feel like a human being again

for debbie's part, she knows cecil will stand by her even when she lashes out like she sometimes feels the need to do. he won't judge her even in her most desperate moments of weakness. it feels good to have that

debbie was warmer towards cecil early on because she was genuinely curious about him and his line of work. i think she'd actually be interested in the bureaucratic aspects of superheroism

the first time cecil had dinner with the graysons (debbie's invitation) he was very awkward and stiff and overly professional. debbie picked up on this and did her best to make him feel comfortable. that stuck in his mind, and he tries to do the same for her still

in general, cecil will remember the smallest personal gestures for a long time. he has a lot of things to keep track of, and he can't afford to be sentimental, but... maybe he's a little less efficient when he's around debbie

making her laugh is his favorite thing in the world. the few times it's happened it was usually something he said that he didn't even realize was funny

they take smoke breaks together and light each other's cigarettes. not often, but old habits die hard and they both understand. after a particularly rough day he'd probably let her put hers out on him if she wanted

if cecil ever let anybody into the goop bath with him it would be her. she's fairly open-minded from dating an alien so i think she would embrace the weirdness of it and treat it like a spa day

cecil once told nolan something along the lines of "you're a lucky man" and then backpedaled as fast as humanly possible as soon as nolan raised an eyebrow

multiverse bonus

in every dimension where debbie aligns herself with nolan, cecil comes to her personally in the hopes that she can be reasoned with and she'll let the gda keep her safe. in at least one of those universes, debbie takes advantage of this to kill him herself <3

there's also a few dimensions where they've died in each other's arms. these are probably the only ones where they can bring themselves to directly say that they love each other, because at that point there's not a lot else that matters

#dedman #cecil x debbie #debbie grayson #cecil stedman #smoking tw

[dustgeonmeshi]

HI CAN I JUST SAY. thank you for having SUCH good opinions of chilchuck (and his daughters) with izutsumi's dynamic!! I thought I was the only one who likes to think really really hard about them!! I have so many hcs about them and a playlist and at least 2k mad rambling in a gdoc somewhere. Like yeah... neither of them wants to admit it (Chilchuck out of professionalism and Izutsumi out of her independent nature) but they are both really good at providing what each other needs emotionally (1/2)

(putting this screenshot here for the sake of keeping both parts together!)

AAAAAAAAA i'm glad to find more people who enjoy their dynamic as much as i do!!!!!! i really love your ideas here and totally agree. like, yes!! chilchuck finds his fulfillment in caring for others, be it his daughters, his party members, or other half-foots. and pairing that with a girl who got used to looking out for herself with the nakamoto family leads to some really sweet stuff. it's nice that they don't desperately NEED each other (hence why i like to imagine she comes and goes as she pleases), but they consistently choose to be around each other because of that reciprocal care they provide.

(more rambling below the cut)

what i find so fun about writing about them is that you HAVE to write around their feelings. like you said, neither one of them would ever say it out loud, but they do care about each other. their acts of care are things like: chilchuck nagging izutsumi to clean up after herself and to wake up at a decent hour, and izutsumi continuously coming back to hang around chilchuck's house long after their time in the dungeon has ended. "I enjoy your presence, and I want you to stay healthy" but it's never actually said out loud.

i guess i'm always partial toward familial dynamics in media, so seeing the innate familial connection between these two (without it being confined into a typical nuclear label) sparked something in my brain. i'm really happy so many people enjoy the content i make of them :')

(also if you ever wanna link your chil & izu playlist or ramblings in my ask box, i certainly wouldn't complain...)

#ask #dust yaps #chilchuck tims #izutsumi #chilchuck & izutsumi

[astroyongie]

Astroyongie Podcast EP3 S1

Note: Please take I slightly. Thank you @kattyaskat for the notes <3

What happened between min heejin & hybe ent?

ADORE CEO and HYBE CEO were very closed. worked together for a long time. exclusive contracts. they both have a lot of shit on each other, but ADORE CEO the most. someone from outside offered something she wanted and she turned her back on HYBE CEO

Do idols ever regret not debuting in other groups? For example does Heesung of Enhypen wish he would've debuted in TXT?

not really since its not up to them to decide where they will be debuting. No Hesseung is happy in TXT

Can you spill the tea on X whole bullying situation with group? Also was there division because of the leader choice?

complicated so take it lightly. the competition started before the group debuting since their were put one against each other. X was actually defending A during the debut period from B,C and D. Eventually X became the pick. At the moment this are better, C reflected a lot on his actions compared to B

how Heeseung enhypen currently love life going on? is he happy and still with the foreign girl in the last reading?

yes

What are LSS gonna do after receiving critique after their Coachella performance?

Sakura: Took things very personally and is kind of hurt about the things people said about her on internet and stuff. I personally believe Sakura thinks that she has the potential and talent and she doesn’t understand why the people are being so mean about her singing skills. I don’t think she believes she needs to work more on it. She believes she has the talent and people are being bitchy about it.

Chaewon: Mostly same like sakura. She’s getting to work on her skills. She’s trying to go more into practice and stuff and doesn’t want to make the same mistake that she did during Coachella. She feels embarrassed about what happened which is why she is putting much effort into

Kazuha: Doesn’t give a damn about what happened. Doesn’t care about what ppl say about her and her group.

Yunjin: She is pissed off with three things. 1. Pissed with Her friends because of talking shit about her. Like being very negative in the internet. 2. Pissed about her members for being low quality in a way she thinks they were the ones making the mistakes and errors during Coachella 3. Pissed with company for not providing them time to prepare to perform. At the moment she is not taking any actions, she is very bitter about the situation

Eunchae: It’s trying to work on herself as well. She is very ashamed about the performance that they gave and she is trying to work on her skills and didn’t want to make the mistake she made in Coachella, just like Chaewon.

Can you maybe do a love reading for Maki from &Team?

At the moment Maki is single. Not looking for love at the moment because of his career and idol lifestyle is not allowing to have someone by his side. He is very invested in career to be with anyone. So single and not open to love at the moment.

Is BK identity already reveal?

No. Only can be checked next month with my pendulum.

Who is Jackson Wang dating? Non idol?

I think so, most likely a non idol. Not sure if they are Chinese or foreigner.

What does Jackson Wang and BIBI think of each other?

Jackson: thinks BIBI is a bit non-lady like. She doesn’t fit the cute lady type. She very restless, has a lot of energy, very impulsive with get ideas and herself and the way she is. He feels she maybe too much for him in being girly. Not a bad vision of her but that she is just too much for him to handle.

BIBI: She thinks he is some one who is very dependable, a very nice idol who has talent and stuffs like that. Thinks he is rich, luxurious and has a good life. She admires him in a professional sense.

Which cards in tarot/spreads /combinations would suggests a connection from past life?

This is complicated cause it will depend on the question that you are making the spread about. If you are directly asking the cards if X and Y shared a past life, you have to look for cards that are very strong. eg. the 4oW,2oC, The star, The judgement, The world. The lovers could also be an indication. Or the 10oC,9oC,6oC.

Does horror movies/ scary movies can lower people vibrations?

This in interesting cause many people are afraid of watching these type of stuffs because they think it attracts those paranormal/ghost stuffs to them- No, that’s not how it works. It does not lower your vibrations. What lowers vibrations is your environment and your own feelings, thoughts. Environment with a lot of pressure, stress can lower your vibrations. However, music can vibrate with you- if you spend listening to sad songs like continuously, that will have an impact. You can listen to sad songs but only when listened to over time frequently, it might impact.

Is it better to have high or low vibration?

It’s best to have Neutral vibration. It’s like having the best of both worlds. Because when you are low vibration-be it because of your bad mental health or physical health, that’s when you are more sensitive to negative things, it’s easy for lower things/beings to be in contact with you. You are vulnerable that time. But also when you are high vibration, you become like a radio. Especially Spirits that are stuck in the veil, they might be able to connect with you. That’s why neutral is best.

So I was practicing 2 hours singing a ballad, will this impact me? I don’t practice everyday but when I practice it’s usually 2-4 hours. It’s not always the same ballade, but does this have an impact on my vibrations?

No . Since you are doing something you enjoy even if it is a sad song/ballad.

Does all human races have a soul?

Yes

Can people in one body have more than one soul?

I don’t believe so. It’s not possible. Although there's the theory that who suffers from DID are a physical body trapping several souls

Can animals have a soul as well?

Yes all animals have souls.

. How is sohee currently doing and how is his love life?

I think you said he is happily dating.

#astroyongie #astroyongie podcast

[hazbinsimp777]

❤️Alastor x Fem Avenger Reader ❤️

Hello everyone! This is a new story I’ve always wanted to do, because I love Alastor, i love Hazbin Hotel and I always loved Marvel. So to me, the only logical thing to do was, mix all together. This will be a full on series! For clarification this would be an alternative universe to the MCU, but still the same characters and backstories! Hope you all have a great time reading!

The HH characters will not be in this chapter, but they will be in the next!

Y/n Roger’s Abilities: Flight, Elemental magic, telekinesis, energy blasts, Superhuman qualities.

GORE! DEATH!CUSSING!

~Chapter 1~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Avengers Tower, 2024, New York.

“Peter! Give me back my taco you bitch!” Y/n yelled, flying from the kitchen while chasing the boy, web slinging to escape.

“Come on Y/n! I’m hungry, a-and you know I’ve been doing a lot for Mr. Stark lately-” Peter said, defending his case and circumstances.

That is when Peter started to float up into the air, startled, he realized it was just you lifting him up. Bringing you closer to him, smirking, taking the taco back, “I’ll make you some tacos spidey just don’t steal mine.”

“O-oh thank you so much Y/n!” He thanked, getting dropped to the ground. You both always had this sibling-like friendship.

“No problem” The fellow young one replied, going back into the kitchen, making her spider friend a taco. Set it on a plate alongside with a glass of sweet tea. The young teen happily ate the meal with pure bliss. “Wow-Aunt May never makes stuff like this.” He adds, his mouth full of food, smiling.

That is when Natasha, Bruce, Clint and Steve (Your adoptive father) entered from the elevator, back again from a mission Fury sent them on. You were one of the youngest avengers, and you did pretty well for yourself, today was one of your days off actually. There was no training, no mission, no assignment, nothing to do. Alteration and Transmutation And you were happy like that.

“If you hadn’t killed him we would’ve gotten the classified information!” Natasha complained to Bruce.

“Hey if you want to complain you gotta tell it to the big guy.” Bruce told the red head, taking off his glasses and rubbing his temples.

“Okay no more arguing, we’ll deal with them next time” Steve said, a smile appearing on his face the second he saw you, “Hi Y/n.” He greeted, giving you a hug.

“Hey dad.” You greeted. Handing him some of his sweet tea, he thanked you.

“Doe, Tony Jr, what have you two been doing?” Nat asked the two of you, sipping some coffee she made herself.��

“This motherfucker took my taco” You pointed dramatically, rolling your eyes, earning a “language” from your father. 

“I gave it back!” Peter argued, giving a somewhat angry expression, crossing his arms.

“Stealing is stealing.” was the only response he got,“where is Tony?” You asked. 

“Oh he's still locked up in the lab.” Bruce said, “You’d think he is married to that place by now.” Steve added, walking out to go in his quarters. 

“See you later, you kids.” Bruce exited, walking out to the living room, followed by Natasha, they had a long day, it makes sense to go rest.

“Do we really have to keep reminding them we aren’t kids?’ Peter turned and asked you. Only a shrug in response, “Wanna go watch Star Wars?” Peter offered.

“Yes!” You answered, dragging him along with some snacks floating behind you. 

Yup that was an average day with the Avengers, after almost dying all the time, you all had formed some kind of bond. Especially you, Peter and Loki, all being the youngest on the team. Well, maybe not Loki, but in Asgardian years, he is twenty-two so, nonetheless still young. You and Peter got Loki in the Star Wars fandom, so you went to knock on his door, he answered with a book in his hand.

“Hello young Steven.” That is just what he called you, since you were so much like your adoptive father, except the more murder part. 

“Hey Lokes, wanna watch Star Wars with me and Pete?” You asked, a smile on your face.

The god sighed, closing the door, then opening back up. He was dressed in his pajamas. Snacks in his hand and an Anakin plushie. You squealed in excitement, grabbing his hand and dragging you along with him, when Peter saw the two of you walk in, you both were squealing in sync. Watching all the movies in your room, on your bed, all warm in a huge purple, cosmic blanket. This was your idea of happiness. And you really loved your life. Nothing was going to change that. 

~The Next Month~

You would be surprised about what can happen in a month, New York has a new threat. HYDRA arose to power again, and SHIELD didn’t even notice with all the cosmic threats going on. Your greatest enemy, Acantha, who had killed your entire family and accidentally gave you your abilities, tried to kill you multiple times, was the leader behind it all. Of course, this infuriated you, because all she wanted to do was wipe out all of the superheroes so she can be the only one with such abilities. And she did not spare any of her victims of the pain, sometimes torture. 

You would never admit it but you wanted revenge. Steve always said it's not the right thing to do. But she caused you so much pain, why not give her a taste of her own medicine, right? It's not something that could send you to hell. 

Fury wanted her and HYDRA gone. When finding out their location, it was time to attack and bring the whole operation down. Everyone was getting ready and geared up, that is until Bucky came up to you.

“Are you sure you want to deal with this doll?” He asked, always seeing you as a daughter more than a niece.

“Of course Buck! I mean, just like any other mission, no?” You said, adjusting your suit and hair.

“Just, don't only focus on revenge, not the best road to be on, I should know.” He patted your shoulder and headed to the quinjet. That really had you thinking, but pushing those thoughts aside.

You had stuff to do. You met everyone there, as soon as you took one step into the vehicle, your stomach dropped. Suddenly, you felt like something very bad was about to happen. Taking your seat, your dad noticed, quickly approaching you, taking a seat next to you.

“Nervous?” He asked, turning his head towards you.

“To be honest, yeah.” You answered, fidgeting with your fingers, looking down.

He put an arm around you, hugging you. “You are unbelievably strong, I know you can face this, as your father, I won’t let anything happen to you.” He reassured, you felt protected.

“Thanks dad, I’ll keep that in mind.” You thanked him, as we left for the pilot’s seat.

That is when Peter, Loki and Thor went to sit next to you. All three of you were always a chaotic squad. They were the best friends you ever had, not like you ever had any growing up. That's when you all started talking, always about the most random things. It was always great to spend time with them, even though Thor was always busy.

With the Quinjet landing, Steve started to explain the plan, for team 1 there was:

-Tony

-Natasha

-Bruce

-Clint

-Thor

Team 2:

-Steve

-Bucky

-Y/n

-Loki

-Peter

Simple enough. Team 1 is assigned to clear and attack the outside perimeter, take out guards, and other agents HYDRA may have in store. Team 2 is assigned to take out the main threats inside the base, even to steal classified files for future plans they may have. Of course, Steve had to say a short speech, ending it with, “Avengers Assemble”

And that is exactly what had happened. With team two, Loki had casted some Asgardian cloaking spells to become unnoticed by the cameras. Steve and Bucky took care of some guards that stood in their way to their control room. Not killing of course. You and Peter, had hacked into some doors in order to get inside the important information, but something wasn’t right.

That is when you looked into the surveillance cameras, it showed the outside, everyone had guns pointed to their heads. Bruce was passed out, only his shorts to cover himself, Nat and Clint were in a headlock by a guard, Tony’s suit was just stuck there, Thor has some kind of mystical handcuffs stuck to him. A wave of shock entered the room when everyone seen, Acantha, now all you felt was anger in your blood.

“I’m going out there.” You said bluntly, hands clenched into fists.

“Y/n no you are not.” Steve and Bucky said at the time in sync.

“I am not kidding, I’m going,” You protested, getting up and walking towards the door. But being blocked by Loki, Steve, and Bucky. Peter was still sitting down, clueless about what to do.

“I am finishing this, with or without you all.” You looked at them with a serious expression.

“Look Y/n-” Loki started, but then an invisible force pinned him to the wall, it was you.

Bucky had a look of disbelief on his face, you never done anything like this, to your cared for ones at least. Before snapping out of his phase of shock, trying to sneak behind you, until you shot some ice toward his metal arm, stuck to a wall by the arm. Steve threw his shield at your feet, not wanting to hurt you, but you caught it (using telekinesis), tying him with some tough tree bark to the ground.

Peter and Loki managed to grab both of your arms, pinning to the ground, struggling to get out of their grip. You used your flight with your legs, lifting them to try to kick Peter in the face, he grabbed your foot with incredible reflexes, throwing you to a wall. Loki then charged at you, using his magic to make illusions of himself, surrounding you. Getting up, wiping some blood from your lip, you used heat to eliminate the fake Lokis, leaving the real one standing. Catching him off guard, you lift him into the air, then stick him to the wall with ice, revealing his jotun form slightly.

Being distracted, Peter took this chance to attach a web to you, pulling you towards the ground. Attaching webs all over your body, apologizing the whole time, getting on top of you, attempting to reason with you. You did not care what he had to say, breaking through them with pure strength, surprising him, you wrap your legs around him, throwing him behind you. The wall is now in ruins at this point, then, wrapping him with a bunch of tree branches.

“Told you, I’m going with or without you.” You said, now literally on fire, walking out.

“Did we all just get"bodied " by a teenage girl?” Bucky asked out-loud, still working on his slang. Peter gave him a smile, clearly proud of the old man, still not able to give him a thumbs up.

You flew to that very location where everyone was at,sparks of lightning radiating off of you. Your eyes glowing blood red, you were going to end her, give her the beating of her life, and brutally kill her once and for all. You then spot her, landing a few feet in front of her, with a loud gust of wind. A look of pure blood lust, anger and revenge written all over your face.

All the avengers were able to do was watch, Acantha, who had a pure shitty grin on her face, was right there waiting for you. Her dark magic radiating off of her, her necklace glowing along with her eyes. Both of you making eye contact.

“Wow, is this what you’ve been doing these past years, kinda pathetic if you ask me.” Acantha said with a smug smile, playing with her magic, she surely knew how to get under your skin.

This only angered you more, “You took everything from me, and now you are going to pay with your life!” You yelled while charging at her, making ice and fire kantanas for both hands.

“You can try, but it will be a very pathetic attempt if you ask me, against the most powerful dark magic wielder!” She said, making herself a magical sword, blocking your attack.

You both fought, almost dying multiple times. She lifted you up, punching you in the face with pure dark magic, sending you flying backwards. Catching yourself by making your own snow, flying back at amazing speeds. Pinning her down, tying her hands with lightning chains to the ground, now on top of her. Punching her with every element and with all the strength you wield.

“You took my family from me!”

Punch with fire.

“Caused me years of trauma!”

Punch with ice.

“You took my boyfriend from me!”

Punch with lightning.

“You took my home from me!”

Punch with a branch.

“You took my childhood from me!”

Punch with energy blast.

“You took my sanity”

Punch from your bare hands, angry tears falling from your eyes.

You just kept punching, being caught off guard, you felt a sharp pain from your heart. Stopping, looking at it, you saw a black, sharp object, coming from your heart, blood coming from your mouth. It was Acantha’s living magic. She then took this chance to punch you, she was beaten up, now you were weak. She walked up to you, standing above you, kneeling beside you as you struggled to breathe. Grabbing you by the hair.

“This is what happens when you mess with people beyond your league.” She whispered in your ear, a knife in front of your neck, slicing it.

Leaving you to die, a pool of blood leaving your body. All the Avengers were in tears, they cannot believe what had just happened. Steve, Peter, Bucky and Loki were all watching from that same control room. Steve tried to keep a straight face, but his eyes were full of sadness and lost.

His daughter, who he swore to protect, was killed brutally under his watch. Everyone had tears in their eyes, you were like family to them, so young and full of potential. That is when Fury and SHIELD agents came as backup. Scaring HYDRA away, including Acathna, evacuating the area. Eventually, they found the Avengers, all being released. 

Now all were gathered in the Quinjet, all in silence, the room was heavy and full of emotion. Fury walked in front of them, catching their attention.

“I am sorry for the loss of Y/n Rogers, I know she meant a great amount to you, a funeral shall be held next week on Thursday, I will give you time to mourn the loss of an incredible Avenger.” He said, then waking back to the pilot's pit of the jet.

No one dared to utter a word.

You woke up, looking at your surroundings, it was so dark and depressing. Looking at yourself, this certainly wasn’t heaven. You realize.

This is hell.

“Dammit.” You muttered.

~~~~~~~~~~~

I hope ya'll liked this! I'm posting this again because all of the chapters got deleted. Thanks to some amazing people who had downloaded some of the chapters, I managed to do this again! I am still working on some request, I'll just be posting a new chapter weekly.

Request are closed!

#hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel #alastor x reader #Fem! Avenger Reader x Alastor Series #the avengers #marvel #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor #alastor x you #alastor x y/n

[daffodilswilloutliveyou]

Okay so maybe someone already said something similar but I have something to say about Madoka Magica

It's about Homura, especially the events in Rebellion

I won't go over why people don't like it because I think they're wrong not to, nope, but il going to talk about the ending so warning spoilers I suppose?

Basically, many people stated that the conversation Madoka and Homura have in the flower field was the turning point that led to Homura becoming a demon, and I agree. What happens is that Madoka clearly said she would never willingly and happily give up her life and leave her loved ones, and that led to Homura deciding to separate Madoka from the law of cycle

HOWEVER there is something important to note !!

Unlike the other characters present in Rebellion who are basically the actual magical girls (plus Bebe), Madoka is solely the version of herself that Homura has in her head. An idealised version of her. Indeed, it wouldn't make sense if she was the real Madoka because then she wouldn't be able to come to her as Madokami, if she was inside the labirynth with the others.

She's only the reflection of what Homura wanted Madoka to be, and the moment Madoka sais she would never be happy doing what she did, it was only what Homura wanted to hear, a way to comfort her in her idea that that was not what Madoka wanted while, in reality, it was not what HOMURA wanted !

I think it's relevant because it completely changes the reasons of Rebellion's ending. Because instead of Homura's actions being done for Madoka's happiness, it was for hers. We tend to forget that the whole point of opposing Madoka and Homura is to oppose Selflessness and Selfishness.

Thanks for reading !

#madoka #puella magi madoka magica #homura #homura akemi #madoka kaname #analysis #pmmm #pmmm rebellion #puella magi madoka magica rebellion

[glitchylikeslego]

Show Me Your Moves! (Chapter 14)

AO3 STORY

WE'RE ALL CAUGHT UP WITH THE AO3 STORY! From this point on in the story, the chapters will be uploaded on here and AO3 on the same days :)

Chapter 14 : Return

Return deals damage and has no secondary effects. It has more power the more friendship the user has.

The Calabash.

Oh how you worried for MK’s mental state.

The thought of Mei ‘confessing’ to MK made you cringe.

When Sandy called you earlier, panicking that MK was missing, you tried to calm him down and explain that MK was most likely okay, but that didn’t help very much.

Instead of opening up shop like normal, Sandy decided to take the day off with his therapy cats and you went to Pigsy’s restaurant for the first time. Upon your arrival, Mei threw herself into you. “You’re okay!”

“Yeah, I’m fine? What happened? I heard MK went missing.”

“He just went on a delivery and never came back! We don’t know the specifics.” Tang explained as Pigsy was grumbling at his counter.

“I’m sure he’s fine. MK is super OP, right? He’ll be fine.” You comforted Mei by patting her head. 

Mei’s muffled “I guess…” Barely reached your ears, and she just shoved her face in your shoulder as she sulked.

Despite Pigsy being obviously irritated that MK hasn’t returned, he still looked really worried and stressed, same with Tang, who’s been chewing the same noodles for longer than he normally would.

You patted Mei on the head and pushed her off yourself and approached Pigsy. “Hey, I said MK would be okay, you just need to trust in him.”

You could hear a quiet voice in the back of your head shout out “hypocrite!” at you. Pigsy sighed. “Ugh I know, but seeing these orders stack up and him not answering my calls still worries me.”

You contemplated for a moment before taking the food into your arms. “I can do it.” You offered. They all looked at you in surprise, and Pigsy thought it over carefully.

“It can give me a good chance to try and look for MK too!” You added, and with that, Pigsy immediately agreed to it.

Mei, with the proposition that you could deliver things for Pigsy and keep a lookout for MK, immediately agreed to drive you around on her motorbike to help you. You spent the next few hours looking for the successor, but to no avail.

And while that was a total flop, it wasn’t all bad, as you ended up coming face to face with an orange cat, and was rescued by the little girl who owned it as her mother thanked you for the delivery.

You felt a cool dread in your gut.

Mei continued driving you around the entire city, even after you were all finished to look for MK, but he still hasn’t come up yet.

Just how long is he stuck in there for?

You and Mei return to Pigsy’s MK-less, both of you being tired from all the driving around, and Mei was sulking even more.

Pigsy and Tang looked at you questioningly, only to deflate again when you shook your head no. 

“I don’t get it. Where is that kid?” Pigsy growled in frustration. 

And speak of the devil and he shall appear. 

Or in this case, the Monkie man. 

In the entrance to Pigsy’s was MK, still slightly frazzled from the Calabash and holding his staff in his hands. 

“MK!” You and Mei exclaim in relief, and Pigsy storms up to him. 

“Where have you been!? You’re lucky those two volunteered to pull your weight for you!” And while he didn’t say it, you could tell Pigsy was relieved that MK was okay. 

And on cue, MK started crying in happiness that Pigsy was normal and not the fake one. 

You decided to tune him out a bit, just glad that everyone isn’t stressed that he was missing anymore. 

And you were startled when everyone began yelling at him. Mainly startled because Mei had screamed loud and it hurt. 

You snapped your lego claw the best you could next to where your ear would be and when you confirmed you still had your hearing, you approached MK and gave him a side hug. “I knew you’d be okay. What happened anyway?”

He shuddered. “Something that I don’t want happening ever again.” 

You nodded as the three continued yelling at MK and decided to be one with the moment, not ready to make another moment like this sour with your cynical thoughts of what’s to come in the near future. 

5 episodes done, 5 more to go…

… dammit brain. 

~~~

<PREV ~ NEXT>

#lego #lego monkie kid #lmk mk #lmk sandy #lmk x reader #lego monkie kid x reader #x reader #reader insert #platonic relationships #platonic #gender neutral reader #gender neutral y/n #gender neutral post #cross posted on ao3 #lady bone demon #lmk macaque #six eared macaque #lmk sun wukong #sun wukong #lmk wukong #lmk pigsy #lmk red son #lmk tang #lmk #lmk mei #lmk monkey king #lmk mayor #lmk porty clone #lmk artist clone #lmk delivery clone

[syrupfog]

I have a lot of trouble reading amnesia fics, and I’ve decided to dissect that. 

I think I just really struggle with reading the rest of the characters in constant emotional pain. I put myself in the shoes of the amnesiac and *i* feel guilty about not being able to remember them

So like. What would it take for me to write an amnesia fic? It would have to be one where no one is hurt by the amnesia. Maybe even one where amnesia is a good thing. 

I think it would start from the (3rd person) pov of the person waking up with amnesia.

And it would be written so we as the readers aren’t suffering from the knowledge that the character’s family/friends are missing them/looking for them/sad at being forgotten. 

So like. A lulaw fic maybe.

Law wakes up in the middle of nowhere. All he knows is his name and that there’s rage inside of him. 

I think we’d meet members of the heart pirates early on, as a promise to the reader that his crew aren’t in pain missing him. They haven’t met, haven’t formed a crew.

Actually I’d like it if the heart pirates (as we know them) are scattered between other pirate crews and Law eventually picks them out and adds them to his own. 

But that would be way later down the line.

I think it starts with him waking up in a little dinghy that’s washed ashore on an empty beach. No one around, totally lost, he tries to scavenge but all his inherent knowledge is how to fend for himself in city environments

So when a ship appears, he begs for a ride to… somewhere. 

He’s welcomed warmly, excitedly, by the captain with the scar under his eye. The others aren’t as trusting, and the archaeologist looks like she wants to say something, but stops herself.

They bring him aboard and he awkwardly tries to integrate while unsure how much to trust them. He feels anger inside, still, and nothing to do With it. 

I think eventually Robin tells him that she knows some of his story. Recognizes his tattoos.

He has his normal forearm and hand tats, but no hearts. 

She tells of a man who matches his appearance who is wanted for burning a country to the ground.

He was second in command of a powerful pirate named Doflamingo, she says. No one knew what transpired between them exactly, but there had been an argument, a fight between them, one that destroyed miles of land around them. Scorched earth. No one had seen either since.

Law doesn’t gain his memories there but he wonders if that’s true. He wonders if he’s a monster. 

What he knows about himself is he’s surly and can’t show emotions on his sleeve like the captain of his ship. He knows he feels rage.

He knows he doesn’t have natural warmth the way these people all seem to. A carefree joy and happiness that he’s surrounded by. 

He thinks he must be evil. 

He wonders what he’s supposed to do about that. Turn himself in?

Luffy says no, that’s dumb. You’re a pirate now, and anyway you don’t remember any of that shit so it would be stupid to turn yourself in. 

He makes it sound simple. 

Law doesn’t think it is.

Oh I think Bepo is on the straw hat crew. 

I think he’s drawn to Law. They make quite a pair, the timid apologizing bear and the quiet, angry man. 

I think when they reach a larger island, Bepo asks permission to follow Law. He’s worried about him. Doesn’t want him to be alone.

I think that’s the start of the heart pirates. 

Penguin and Shachi are on Kid’s crew, and I think Kid only lets them follow Law because Penguin and Killer are married so they’ll always have SOME loyalty to him.

But they find him much later, after Law’s picked up a small ship with Bepo. They have a run in with the Kid pirates because Kid had MET Doffy and Law at some point previously and he tries to fight Law. 

This is the first time Law learns he has a devil fruit.

Because he’s running from Kid (“I don’t fucking know you stop acting like I do!”) and Kid is confused why he’s not at the very least using room to get away. 

When he stops trying to beat Law’s ass (mostly because Bepo protects him), Kid very angrily explains.

About the op op fruit and about how Law had been the one to sever his arm. 

Law maybe has a panic about that. More proof he’s evil. 

Kid says with Law’s fruit he didn’t have to worry about bleeding out at least. He just. Didn’t have an arm anymore.

Was that a kindness? Who knows? 

(Eventually Law knows. He knows he was trying to help, knows there was something in him that told him enemies of Doffy were his allies). 

Anyway he gets Penguin and Shachi there. 

He still gets Jean Bart at Sabaody, the next time he sees Luffy.

He still keeps running into Luffy, the personification of warmth and the one who first saved him. There’s gratitude there. There’s love, later. 

His memories come back to him in nightmares. Flevance. Doflamingo. 

He doesn’t remember Cora.

He doesnt remember Cora but he does remember Doflamingo arranging a marriage. Charlotte Pudding (okay she’s like 10 years older in this timelines are hard). He didn’t tolerate her, but he could never disobey Doffy.

She DID escape the fire. He finds her over a year later. He gets back the memories she took, at Doffy’s command. 

He remembers Cora. 

The heart pirates get their name. 

He gets his heart tattoos.

He knows where the anger in him came from. Even when she took his memories she couldn’t take the love and anger buried in him. 

The next time he sees Luffy he’s a full fledged pirate captain with a crew who’s been there as he’s discovered himself.

He’s grateful to Luffy but Luffy doesn’t care about that. 

He cares about the first time he sees Law smile with real joy on his face. 

And then I dunno they kiss or something.

#lawlu #lulaw #my writing