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#bill istvan
skarsgod · 2 years
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Bill Skarsgård, 2022.
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rivermoon333 · 1 year
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An old interview excerpt from Bill... explaining his middle name 😆
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https://www.gq.com.au/entertainment/celebrity/bill-skarsgrd-on-family-fancy-parties-and-the-movie-industry/news-story/9eda4586ec5897c4b76302055af5c089
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anastasiaskarsgard · 1 year
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Barbarian would of been a way different movie if I had shown up at that house. It would of gotten real X rated real quick, and then when whatever is the bad guy in this show, showed up, I’d turn into an assassin and kill some evil entity buck ass naked, defending my new boo. Then after I killed whatever the fuck, it’d zoom in on my face and then the word barbarian would appear on my face.
Roll credits
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justapennywisefan · 2 years
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August 9th 2022
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Happy birthday, Bill Skarsgård!
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We all love you🤍🎈🥺
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filmkaosz · 1 year
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Bill Skarsgård – Wikipédia
Bill Istvan Günther Skarsgård
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poppyisnotaflower · 1 year
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Bill Istvan Günther Skarsgård is serving the wettest fuckin cunt I've seen with those fits and that accent as Marquis Vincent de Gramont
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minkyungseokie · 25 days
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Actors
Where I write for an actor or any of the characters they have played
Bill Skarsgård
Bill Istvan Günther Skarsgård is a Swedish actor best known for portraying Pennywise in the horror films It and It Chapter Two
Jacob Elordi
Jacob Elordi is an Australian actor known for Euphoria, The Kissing Booth film series, and Priscilla
Jeff Ward
Jeff Ward is an American actor. He is best known for his role as Deke Shaw in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D
Peter Gadiot
Alan-Peter Gadiot is a British actor. Gadiot is best known for his role as James Valdez in the USA Network show Queen of the South and for his role as Shanks in the One Piece Live Action
Milo Manheim
Milo Manheim is an American actor. He is known for his starring role as Zed in the 2018 Disney Channel Original Movie Zombies
Pearce Joza
Pearce Joza is an American actor, known for Mech-X4, Lab Rats, and Zombies 2 + 3
Charlie Bushnell
Charlie Bushnell is an actor portraying Luke Castellan in the Disney+ adaptation of Percy Jackson and the Lightning Theif
Taz Skyler
Tarek Yassin “Taz” Skylar  is a Spanish and English actor and screenwriter based in London. Kown to play Sanji in OPLA
Iñaki Godoy
Iñaki Godoy Jasso s a Mexican actor who is known for his role as Juan Ruiz in The Imperfects (2022) and Monkey D. Luffy in Netflix's One Piece Live Action
Morgan Davies
Morgan Davies is an trans Australian actor known for playing Koby in the One Piece Live Action. I love him sm
Tom holland + Zendaya Coleman
Thomas Stanley Holland is an English actor known for Spiderman Zendaya Maree Stoermer Coleman is an American actress and singer Spiderman, and more
Timothée Chalamet
Timothée Hal Chalamet is an American and French actor and producer.
Jacob Romero
Jacob Romero Gibson is an American actor. He is best known for playing Usopp in the Netflix series One Piece
Finlay MacMillan
Scottish actor who plays Enoch O'Connor in the film adaptation of Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children
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pascow · 2 years
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All actors have comfort zones. Some actors tend to only do parts where they can play in those comfort zones, and you get bored of them because they always do the same thing over and over again. I think if I have a goal, it would be to play so many different complete characters. That is something I really admire in other actors, being able to play this different range of characters.
Happy Birthday, Bill Istvan Günther Skarsgård!! b. August 9, 1990.
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colorful-white-ideas · 9 months
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FOR THE PEOPLE THAT IS FOLLOWING BOB.BY SILL ACCOUNT
I know alot of us are picking up the subject and assuming that the one behind the acc is Bill. I see the account has been gaining a good amount of female followers in the past few days ...
So I just want to say this for the sake of the fandom:
PLEASE BE CAREFUL AND DON'T INTERACT WITH WHOEVER IS BEHIND THIS. Don't Dm him/her , don't send personal pictures, don't answer anything that profile might ask you , if they ever do.
If you want to leave a like or a couple of comments that's ok, that's safe in some way but please PLEASE don't go beyond that cause real life is not a fanfiction, we don't know for certain that the Real BILL ISTVAN GUNTHER SKARSGÅRD is managing the acc, we believe it might be him but there is no actual proof and even if it's really him that profile doesn't have his verified name ....
And we don't really now what this boby side of Bill could be capable of doing therefore if something goes wrong how would he be held accountable?
Besides this account can also be a prank account with a bunch of people of Bill circle ready to make fun or poke the fandom because they are bored... Be careful , keep an eye open , don't trust fully in people you don't and would never know.
Life is not fanfiction, Bill Skarsgård won't see your profile picture or your good comments and fall in love with you. It sounds hard but I say this cause women, especially young women are vulnerable out there and I would hate to see someone hurt by this. We women have to stick together , protect each other, just remember what Brian McGreevy ( Bill's friend and hemlock Grove author) did to impress teenagers before ... He used Bill's image, and Bill said nothing.
Stay safe out there.
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bskarsgardlove92 · 9 months
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Happy Birthday, Bill Istvan Günther Skarsgård!
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Happy Birthday, Bill Skarsgård!
I wish you all the best, happiness, health, luck and success!
I hope you have a fantastic day with your loved ones, lots of cake and beautiful presents! I hope you get everything you wish for! 🎁🎂🎈
You're the best! Jag älskar dig! ❤
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possession · 2 years
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Bill Istvan Günther Skarsgård is a Swedish actor, producer, director, writer, voice actor, and model. He is best known for portraying Pennywise in the supernatural horror films It (2017) and It Chapter Two (2019), based on Stephen King's novel of the same name. He also voiced the Deviant Kro in the Marvel Cinematic Universe film Eternals (2021). Skarsgård has also appeared in the comedy Simple Simon (2010), the dystopian thriller The Divergent Series: Allegiant (2016), the espionage thriller Atomic Blonde (2017), the comedy-horror Villains (2019), and the drama Nine Days (2013–2015) and the anthology horror series Castle Rock (2018–2019). He played the lead role in the Netflix series Clark (2022)
HAPPY 32TH BIRTHDAY BILL SKARSGÅRD
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skarsgod · 2 years
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evren-sadwrn · 2 months
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comparing bill skarsgård to MACHINE GUN KELLY is WILD. who is this rando compared to bill istvan gunther skarsgard 🥱/silly
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anastasiaskarsgard · 1 year
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OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!
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Bill is playing a pretentious, well dressed, asshole with questionable morals, and nefarious intentions?!?!
😍🥳🥺
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callmebrycelee · 6 months
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MY MAN CRUSH MONDAY IS...BILL SKARSGÅRD SPOOKY SEASON EDITION
FULL NAME: Bill Istvan Günther Skarsgård
DATE OF BIRTH: August 9, 1990
PLACE OF BIRTH: Vällingby, Stockholm, Sweden
AGE: 33
SIGN: Leo
BEST KNOWN FOR: Portraying Axel Cluney/Zeitgeist in Deadpool 2; Pennywise the Dancing Clown in It and It Chapter Two; Kro in Eternals; Keith Toshko in Barbarian; and Marquis Vincent de Gramont in John Wick: Chapter 4.
HEIGHT: 6 feet and 4 inches tall
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sweetbillwriting · 11 months
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Love Just Happens
A New Chapter
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Characters: The future's Bill Skarsgård and others close to him. The rest is my own characters. 
Setting: This story is set in the future but because it's hard to say how the world is then (and it isn't that important for the story) the future is similar to our time now, even with fashion and so on. 
Warnings: 18+, age difference, smut, alcohol, talk about death, talk about drugs, ageism, all kind of talks about pregnancy, abortion, kinks and fetishes.
Notes: I just missed them too much 🩷
This is not a political stance.
Bill crawled closer to the warm body in their bed. He would almost feel guilty the mornings he didn't lay close to Aurora. They weren't like most married couples, who had the luxury to wake up together every morning so when they did, Bill wanted to lay as close as he could. If he were lucky she would even let him slip into her as she started to wake up. He smirked to himself of the thought of getting a morning lay but realized after just a few seconds the body next to him was too broad and way too hairy. When he opened his eyes he looked straight into the dog Istvan's broad gray neck. The dog snored a bit but so did Aurora quite often even if Bill told her she never did. Bill gave the big dog a pat but missed his wife. His wife. That’s what Aurora was now. They had been married for five months with a small wedding at a vineyard in Italy. It was perfect. Aurora had been really sad for a few days before that because her father wouldn't be able to walk her to the aisle and talked about canceling just because she didn't want to go by herself. Bill's father saved the day by offering to walk with her and Bill liked seeing his father give Aurora a forehead kiss before giving her over to Bill. Her mother also thought it was beautiful and said Paolo would have loved it, especially seeing her so happy. Their marriage was as close as you can come to a fairytale with paparazzis, intrusive fans and jobs all over the world. Not many other couples would have been able to handle it but their relationship seemed to be stronger than they ever thought.
Bill turned around towards the nightstand to check his phone. Nine AM. October 5th. It was the day Aurora would come home to Sweden again from working in L.A. He stood up a bit more excitedly than was okay for a grown man and pulled on the pajama pants and t-shirt that laid on the floor, next to the other dog, Diana. He could hear that Aurora was home because Mariah Carey songs were lightly playing from the first floor. Mariah Carey would never be played if he was alone. He walked down the stairs and looked around for Aurora, she sat snuggled up on a couch under a window and looked out over the archipelago sky that now shifted in orange and brown.
"Hey babe," he said happily and sat down as close as he could to her and kissed her naked shoulder. Aurora smiled and dragged her nails over Bill's scalp and spread her legs so he could come closer so they could be really close. They made out softly with beating hearts and for Bill his sex had also started to beat in the same rhythm. She had been away for twelve days and for a newly wed couple it was like several years.
"Missed you so much Lou… Little Lou…" Bill said softly and he could feel her smile against his shoulder while they embraced. Bill kissed her neck and dragged a hand over her chest in her thin tank top. Aurora let him touch her but he reacted on how little she touched him. They had been away from each other before and when they would finally reconnect she would touch every part of him like she wanted to remind herself how his body felt. Still, even if Aurora wasn't behaving like she usually would, he pulled down his pants so she could play with his erection. She used to like giving him a blow job when she got home, like she wanted to remind him of who owned his cock and the rest of his body and soul. Aurora looked down at his big hard cock and Bill smirked a bit to himself because he thought she would say something about it, how big and pretty it was, instead he felt worried and surprised when Aurora just sighed deeply.
"Pull your pants up," she said distantly and moved away from him.
Bill swallowed hard and pulled up his pajama pants.
"I'm sorry…" He said doubtfully. He felt stupid for having been rejected and also a bit pathetic that he had immediately begged for sexual intimacy.
Aurora shrugged her shoulders and looked out over the backyard. Bill looked closely at her face and could now see that there was something. It was obvious Aurora had something on her mind.
"Is it something, honey? How are you?" He asked carefully and played a little with one of her white fluffy socks she had on.
Aurora looked at Bill who gave him a strained smile. She shook her head and leaned forward to give him a kiss. She couldn't fool him, even if her kisses were soft and everything he wanted. He had seen her face and had learned to recognize the feelings she radiated. Several thoughts jumped around as she kissed him a second and a third time. Has she met someone else? Was she bored of him and their simple life? Was she sick?
"Please… please Lou…" he said and pushed her away carefully when she kissed him a fourth time. He took her face in his hands and searched after her eyes.
"Please just tell me what it is."
Aurora looked at Bill in silence while her eyes got more and more glassy. She didn't want to tell him but it was him that she needed. She looked down at Bill's t-shirt and dragged down the neckline a bit to look at his collarbones. He let her drag her fingers over his chest and feel his heart against her palm. He knew that would calm her down.
"I'm pregnant," she said suddenly without looking up.
"Hm?" Bill wasn't at all ready to hear that word and had pushed all such thoughts away because he knew Aurora didn't want kids.
"I'm pregnant," said Aurora again, a bit louder and looking at him with tearful eyes. Bill felt himself smile by thinking about Aurora heavily pregnant and then with a little baby in her arms but he wiped the silly smile away when he remembered that Aurora probably wasn't happy at all.
"Oh…" he said with furrowed brows and tried to come up with something to say. His ex's first pregnancy had also come suddenly but back then he was the one that had mixed feelings about it, now it was the woman in his life who had mixed feelings and it was her who had all the power in this. Of course he was pro choice and agreed that it was the woman's choice. It was her body but it still felt weird thinking she probably would abort their baby.
"So can you call our doctor?" She said and dragged her hands over her knees with a low gaze. Bill nodded, of course she must have a check up and he would be by her side the whole time.
"So she can find someone that can abort it," Aurora said with a harsh tone. Bill looked at her carefully.
"Stop looking at me like that," she said and stood up like she couldn't handle sitting next to him.
"I wasn't…"
Bill really tried to not show any emotions because he knew that would just create conflict but he couldn't stop the feelings within to spill out in his telling eyes.
"You know I don't want…" Aurora swallowed hard like she couldn't say the word and Bill just nodded. He looked at her standing in front of him with crossed arms in a short tank top and pink velour pants. She was so perfect and their child would probably inherit that from her. He lowered his gaze when he realized what he thought about. It wasn't a child yet, it was just a clump of cells. Nothing more, still he saw a baby with big brown eyes when he thought about it.
"I'm calling her tomorrow okay? I just…" he sighed and looked away but felt himself relax when Aurora laid her hands on his shoulders. She leaned her forehead against his and breathed him in.
"I'm sorry…" she whispered and closed her eyes so the tears wouldn't spill over.
"I'm sorry too…" Bill whispered back and pulled her into an intimate hug.
×××
Could you see it on her? Has her breasts become bigger? Her hips rounder? Maybe her face started to look swollen just like her friend Liv's face had done. Was the pimple in her forehead because of what was happening inside her body?
Aurora looked at her naked body in the bathroom mirror. She couldn't remember how she had looked before and imagined she was bigger. She didn't even know what week she was in. Maybe it was too late to have an abortion?
Her tits definitely were bigger. She had always wanted bigger boobs but now she didn't want it anymore. She just wanted to look like she always had.
"Are you okay, babe?" Bill asked when he came into the bathroom. He pulled down his boxers and made the shower ready for them.
"Does it show?" She turned to him like she wanted him to examine her body. Bill couldn't see much of a difference and dragged her naked body close to his.
"No. Not at all. You look like you usually do."
Aurora hugged Bill closer even if she didn't believe his words. She knew he had a thing for imagining her pregnant and she had even done some harmless role plays with him where she was pregnant just to let him live out his fantasies. Of course he wouldn't tell the truth because then she would probably not let him come close to her pregnant body.
Bill leaned down and kissed her deeply, she kissed back and let his hands explore her body. He continued in the shower and Aurora let him because it was nice to think about something else other than what was happening inside of her. After the shower he carried her to bed so he could more easily slip into her. She stood on all fours with Bill behind her, right then it was a relief to not need to look Bill in the eyes.
"Harder," she moaned and Bill did what she asked. He could hear that she was in some sort of pain but sometimes she liked that.
"Harder," she said again and Bill changed his position to be able to move faster. She made a cry when he got too deep and he at once stopped his movement.
"Babe? Are you okay," he asked and dragged a loving hand over her back. Aurora just answered by pushing back at him and pressed her cheek down at the bed.
"Don't fucking stop." She almost sounded angry but he did what she said and hit her cervix over and over. His brain became like mush while fucking her so hard and deep otherwise he would had thought about why she wanted him to give it to her so hard. She even bled but it wasn't anything Bill noticed until afterwards when he saw that his member was bloody.
Aurora pretended to fall asleep at once so she wouldn't need to talk with Bill about it. She just wanted him to use her body and not treat her like a fragile pregnant woman. To her surprise Bill was on to give her some rough lovemaking and it also helped her to think about something else. She even liked that it hurt and burned afterwards, it made her just think about that. She felt Bill's plump lips kiss her shoulder than he crawled closer to her from behind. Even if she thought she could think about something else but Bill destroyed that idea at once. He laid close to her and then dragged both his hands over her naked stomach and hushed. Maybe he hushed her but it felt like he had an inner conversation with the fetus.
×××
Aurora sat silent and looked at her platform Dr Martens. They were new and still uncomfortable to wear but with the awful weather in Sweden they would probably be well-worn in just a month. She sat in a white, fresh room on a beige couch. A hospital waiting room for rich people. Aurora had been just as comfortable in a normal hospital but because of her fame, her husband's fame and the sensitive topic she was at some fancy woman health clinic that smelled of citrus.
Bill cleared his throat next to her. He had a cold a few weeks ago and his throat was still raspy. She looked up at him. His hair was shorter, swept to the side and had a bit of a stubble. He wore the beige cable knitted sweater he had bought when they were in New York earlier that autumn.
"I love you," she whispered to him and laid her head against his upper arm. Bill looked down on her and gave her a forehead kiss. "Jag älskar dig," he whispered back and dragged his fingers through the ends of her hair. They have had some fights the last week after Aurora had told him about the pregnancy. Not really about the pregnancy but it was obvious to the both of them that’s what it was actually about. The day before he had watched her drink two big glasses of Amarone and he had watched her intensely. She was pregnant. When she had found him staring she had gotten angry but as usual she cried instead and he felt guilty. They wouldn't keep it so why would she stop drinking alcohol? He knew he was in the wrong but he couldn't stop seeing the fetus as their child.
"Aurora Lou Isaac?" Said a nurse who waited on them by the doorway to a corridor. Instead of looking at the nurse, Aurora looked at Bill, who gave the nurse a nod and an awkward smile. He took Aurora's hand and then followed her into the doctor's room.
Aurora hadn't been to a gynecologist in a few years and wasn't comfortable at all doing a check up or even an ultrasound. Bill saw her eyes tearing just by taking off her pantyhose.
"Are you okay, babe?" He asked the whole time and even if it was repetitive it was nice having him there, checking her.
"You're in week ten, so it's early in the pregnancy," said the doctor when they sat by her desk. Aurora just nodded a little while Bill chewed his lips and looked at her carefully. Bill gave the doctor a look too and she seemed to be uncomfortable. There were probably not many newlyweds who came into her office to have an abortion.
"It's just a pill, right?" Aurora asked while playing with the edge of her skater skirt.
"Yes, it's a pill you’ll take here then you’ll get some other pills to take home to start the abortion. If you want to, you can have some time with our psychiatrist."
"It's okay," interrupted Aurora with a small but determined voice.
The doctor nodded a little but then looked at Bill.
"Maybe you want to see her and talk a little?"
Bill licked his lips and smiled a bit uncomfortably but didn't say anything. The doctor waited on an answer and so did Aurora. She knew he felt differently about this abortion but they hadn't really talked about it because Aurora was afraid he would persuade her to keep it even if she didn't want to have it.
"I have another… Contact. But thank you," said he to the doctor who nodded a little. She looked at Aurora up and down, maybe because of how famous she was and was now sitting in front of her asking for something so private and sensitive or she looked at her because she wondered why a 28 year old, healthy, married woman didn't want to have children. Bill gave Aurora a look too who sat and looked at her long manicured nails. It looked like she was talking to herself.
"I think it's good if you go home to think about this, talk and prepare for the abortion but I put up a time for you on Monday to come here to take the first pill? Then you can start the abortion at home the following days."
Aurora nodded a little without raising her gaze. Bill nodded and looked at the doctor for her but swallowed hard.
"Thank you…" he said softly and then had an awkward last conversation, a summary of their meeting, before saying goodbye. When he stood up to go Aurora stayed in the chair, continuing to look at her nails.
"Babe? Should we go? Lou?" He asked carefully and put his hand out to her. "Lou?" He said again when he didn't get in contact with her. The doctor gave Bill an empathetic look while he waited for his young wife to bring herself together. He had understood this was hard for her but thought the need for a childless life was bigger but while watching Aurora's distant face he wondered if she didn't think the choice was so easy any more.
"Aurora?" The doctor put a friendly hand on her shoulder and then crouched down in front of her.
"Go home and think about this, okay? And remember that it's your choice and it's okay to change your mind," said the doctor softly to her. Bill interpreted it like the doctor believed he was the one who wanted an abortion but he didn't make a thing out of it, she had been able to reach Aurora who now nodded and stood up. He didn't feel comfortable that the doctor seemed to believe he was her older controlling husband but that feeling disappeared when Aurora pressed her face against his sternum and cried. He hugged his wife hard and just wished for her to be happy again.
×××
Neither Bill or Aurora were the type that talked with others about their relationship or other intimate factors of life. They spoke with each other and if they really needed someone else's view they selected the person carefully. For Bill that person most often was Gustaf, his older brother but for this he wanted to talk to the only person he had shared similar experiences with; his ex. It was maybe odd in some people's eyes but when it came to his experiences of pregnancy she was the only one who he had shared it with.
"We were at the doctor yesterday and Lou… She just disappeared into herself. Like I couldn't even come in contact with her," said Bill worriedly and dragged his palms up and down his thighs.
His ex hugged her coffee mug in her hand and looked between Bill and a picture of Aurora, their kids and her dogs on the wall behind him.
"I don't think many women take abortion easily… She probably needs time to really feel if it's the right choice and is morally okay," she said and looked at Bill who dragged his fingers over his stubbly jaw.
"But it is morally okay. Of course. She knows everyone around her thinks so."
"Yes but she probably questions that now when it is her own body."
Bill nodded. It was something he had thought too but it was more real when a woman said it. He could only guess how it was to carry something that might become a living human.
"What do you want?" His ex asked carefully. She had gotten used to seeing Bill and Aurora together and was happy seeing Bill happy, instead of that sad version of himself he was with Hilma. But it could still hurt because she knew Bill was her big love but Aurora was Bill's. It had been hurtful to read in interviews how he spoke about Aurora like the angel coming into his life and hear people talk about her Bill as a part of the perfect couple with another woman. She was happy for Bill, she was happy her girls loved Aurora but it was still an open wound.
"You know what I want… I just know Aurora would be such an amazing mom and I would really love to share all those moments with her you know?"
Of course she knew what he meant so she nodded but it felt weird that Bill would have a baby again, while she would soon be fifty years old.
"Does she know that?"
"Yeah. But it's not like if I told her she would change her mind?"
"But maybe that knowledge makes it harder for her to stand for what she wants?"
Bill was quiet. He didn't want to think he was the one making Aurora sad but he guessed his ex was right. The fights they have had showed the same thing.
"Maybe you should actually say that you are supporting her?"
Just when his ex finished her sentence he heard the entrance door. Aurora had come home early, he must quickly come up with an excuse as to why his ex was there. When Aurora came into the kitchen dressed in flared pants and a short hot pink and purple sweater his ex smiled at her but also gave her an obvious top to toe look. Looking after signs of pregnancy. Aurora, who was so sensitive, was also an expert at seeing such behavior. She gave Bill a hurt look.
"Fuck you. Fuck you." She shook her head and walked out from the kitchen.
"Lou…" he said regretfully and walked after her.
"No! This is not something to share! This is between us! As a married couple, or did you forget I am your wife and not her?"
Aurora cried and Bill just stood and watched her. He just needed advice, he never meant to go behind her back.
"Of course I haven't forgotten that… Babe, you're everything to me…"
"Then fucking show it!" She said with tears streaming down her cheeks and then ran up the stairs. Bill stood behind frozen. He felt awful. He had just wanted to get some advice from a person knowing how it is to be pregnant. He felt his ex's hand on his back but squirmed away.
"I think it's best if you go…" he said without looking at her. He knew it wasn't her fault but he also knew he would be even more upset at seeing her. He was so stupid.
Aurora sat on their bed and cried and tried to breath slowly. She knew Bill didn't mean to hurt her but seeing his ex made her feel even more awful about the situation. She had birthed three children with him, while she was prepared to kill the life they had created. She knew it was just a fetus, just a mutation of his sperm and her egg, things they didn't miss on their own. She knew Bill was liberal, even pro social democracy and had good values about women and also abortion but she also remembered his smile when she said she was pregnant. Of course he wanted it. Of course he saw it as a child. And now he was drinking coffee with the woman who had given him children. The better woman. She wished she had never been pregnant and never had wondered what Bill would actually feel for her when she killed their child.
Bill walked up the stairs slowly when his ex had left their house. Aurora really was everything to him but it was a difficult situation for him too. It wasn't as easy as he wished it would be. He doubted outside of the bedroom door but felt his body act on its own by seeing Aurora cry on the edge of the bed. He would never get used to seeing her cry even if she did it so easily, especially when he knew she cried because of him.
He thought about sitting down next to her but saw at the last moment that she had taken off her wedding rings and they laid next to her on the spot he had thought about sitting down on. He took the rings in his hand before sitting down and looked at them. They fit on his pinky and were in thin gold, one of them had a princess cut diamond but not at all as big as he thought she would have wanted. It was actually quite modest, classic. He wanted to comment why they were lying on the bed but also knew that wasn't the most important thing right now.
"I just wanted some advice…" he whispered to her and looked down at her thighs. Aurora nodded a little and dried her tears. She knew he just wanted advice and it was probably just her who made the situation into something else but her chest hurt anyway.
"I will support whatever you decide… I just want to see you happy, Lou. That's the only thing that's important to me. You know I would love… with you, but never ever if you don't want it."
Aurora looked up at Bill and dried her eyes. It calmed her, she even felt that warm sensation in her body but she couldn't smile. She nodded a little and sighed.
"I'm sorry I don't want it…" she whispered but Bill dragged her close to him.
"I'm sorry you feel like you must say your sorry for that. I knew you didn't want children. I wanted you anyway. I said that I just wanted you."
Aurora cried harder and crawled up into Bill's lap. She hugged him hard around his neck. He was such a great man. The kind of man you marry. The kind of man you have kids with.
Bill took her hand in his and put on the rings on her finger.
"My wife. The woman in my life. Never ever doubt that."
×××
The pill in the doctor's hand looked small and insignificant but it was the thing that would make the fetus stop growing, that would stop it from becoming something more. Bill sat next to her on the couch in the small room. It was meant to be calming but to Aurora it was chaos. She sat and watched the pill for a while and hugged Bill's hand inside both of hers. His hand was so much larger than hers that it actually was more logical she would hold it with two hands. She gave him a look with glassy eyes.
"Please can you..?" She nodded towards the pill in the doctor's hand and the glass of water. It wasn't like he could swallow the pill for her but he could give it to her, make himself a part of the process. It was probably what she wanted, to feel that she had his support. He took the small pill from the doctor and the water glass and turned so he sat more towards Aurora. The pill looked like any pill but it was something much bigger than it looked like. He put his hands out to her, like he was giving her communion and she looked down at it with the same serious expression.
"It's okay, babe…" he whispered and put the pill closer to her. Aurora looked down at it then up at Bill's face. She did that a couple of times while tears ran down her cheeks. She looked at the doctor.
"I need more time…" She whispered as she pushed Bill's hands away from herself like it could bite her or jump down her throat. Bill looked down at the pill in confusion but lowered it along with the glass of water and rested them on his thighs.
"Please just throw that away…" she said to Bill and hugged herself. The doctor took the pill and glass quickly and as soon as Aurora couldn't see it anymore she threw herself in Bill's arms and cried hysterically.
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Bill didn't know what this meant. And for now he wouldn't ask. He stood in the kitchen, making meatballs as he listened to soft Motown songs. It was music both he and Aurora enjoyed and it wouldn't irritate or depress her. She sat so he could see her on the small couch in front of the window. She was dressed in pink flannel pajamas and looked out over the yard in silence. There would probably be some days where the both of them wore lounge wear and didn't talk that much. It had been a few such days when Aurora found out her ex, Timmy, had died of an overdose.
Bill knew she wasn't upset with him and didn't feel stressed about that but he understood that so many emotions and thoughts were flying around in her head and was careful with her. She needed him close but not to ask too many questions.
Aurora didn't know what this meant either. She didn't understand why she couldn't take the pill and tried to understand it herself. Did she want the baby? Or was it just a reflex? She looked at Bill's back while he made meatballs. He was dressed in a cozy looking gray knitted sweater and black sweatpants. He looked snuggly and she wished she could press her nose against his back and breath in that heavenly musk of him but something stopped her. She dragged a hand over her belly when she knew Bill wasn't watching. Her stomach was still as it used to be but her breasts were tense and felt swollen, the same way they could feel when she had PMS. She just wanted to be close to Bill but there were too many emotions, too many questions and changes that she had a problem letting him in completely.
She thought about calling her mother but she knew her opinion and how strong-willed she was, she would probably just persuade her to have it. She thought about calling Erica but Erica was pregnant at 32 weeks and would never understand. Maybe she would have called Sonny but he was a man, he wouldn't understand either. The only one she could really see herself talking to was Bill but he was the father. He was more a part of this than anyone else.
Suddenly Bill stood next to her with a meatball in his hand. Istvan sat pretty next to him and when Bill smiled and showed he wanted to feed her, Istvan whined with jealousy. Aurora giggled a little and took a bite of the meatball then gave the other half to the dog. Bill's meatballs were always good and real comfort food. She smiled at him and sucked his fingers from the grease. Bill smiled too and let her continue to suck his fingers while watching him with big eyes.
"Good?" He asked with a teasing smile when she sucked his long finger down to his knuckle. She nodded with the finger in her mouth and looked at Bill with big eyes. He could always make her think of something else than the hard things in life. Or maybe not all of the hard things.
"I must continue now…" he said pained but Aurora just nodded and took a hold of the hem of his sweatpants so she could come with him. Like he often did, he lifted her up on the counter so she could watch him cook and she sang along to the The Temptations song. This was how life should be. The simple life. Just the two of them.
Bill was happy seeing Aurora close to him again, she even sang. He looked at her discreetly and decided that he would talk to her the next day about what happened at the doctor's if she was still this way. Maybe she would be calm then and could talk with him without getting so emotional. He looked down into her pajama shirt when she leaned down and could see one of her breasts. They were bigger. Round and full. Would she just let him play with them a bit?
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She let him lay on her chest the whole night, even if they didn't have sex. His hands hugged her breasts and for the first time they weren't swallowed by his broad palms. It hurt a bit when he kneaded them in his hands but it was also nice and she wondered if he maybe would succeed in making her lactate. It was strange thinking she could probably do that and she got nervous when Bill the next day sucked her tit like he was a baby. Maybe it was weird that he was so fascinated by her breasts, maybe it was even stranger she let him do that when she would terminate the pregnancy. She felt his hard cock against her but let it be while he continued to play with her chest. His plan was to talk to her but now he was so pleased laying between her swollen breasts and didn't want to risk his VIP seat. Aurora dragged her hands through his hair while watching his tongue play with her nipple. She didn't know anyone that could look so erotic as he did. The perfect family father was the dirtiest daddy with her. Daddy, she thought again and let the word slip when his teeth scraped against her nipple. The word felt different now but still the same. She would always be his little Lou.
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To be continued...
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