#brain fart still going strong

[fintan-pyren]

Sometimes, life is busy. You shouldn't let that stop you from enjoying a good book, but who has the time to read the same words over and over again?

For your enjoyment and convenience, I have removed all duplicate words from the first Keeper of the Lost Cities book.

blurry fractured memories swam through sophie’s mind but she couldn’t piece them together tried opening her eyes and found only darkness something rough pressed against wrists ankles refusing to let move a wave of cold rushed as the horrifying realization dawned was hostage cloth across lips stifled cry for help sedative’s sweet aroma stung nose when inhaled making head spin were they going kill would black swan really destroy their own creation what point project moonlark then everblaze drug lulled toward dreamless oblivion fought back clinging one memory that could shine tiny spot light in thick inky haze pair beautiful aquamarine fitz’s first friend new life ever maybe if hadn’t noticed him day museum none this have happened no knew it’d been too late even white fires already burning curving city filling sky with sticky smoke spark before blaze miss foster mr sweeney’s nasal voice cut blaring music he yanked earbuds out by cords you decided you’re smart pay attention information sophie forced open not wince bright fluorescents reflected off vivid blue walls amplifying throbbing headache hiding sweeney mumbled shrinking under glares now staring classmates pulled shoulder-length blond hair around face wishing hide behind it exactly kind went way avoid why wore dull colors lurked blocked other kids who at least foot taller than survive twelve-year-old high school senior perhaps can explain listening your ipod instead following along held up like evidence crime though probably he’d dragged class natural history balboa park assuming his students be excited about all-day field trip didn’t seem realize unless giant dinosaur replicas came started eating people cared tugged loose eyelash nervous habit stared feet there make understand needed cancel noise hear chatter from dozens tourists echoed fossil-lined splashed cavernous room mental voices real problem scattered disconnected pieces thoughts broadcast straight into brain being hundreds tvs different shows same time sliced consciousness leaving sharp pains wake freak secret burden since fell hit five years old she’d blocking ignoring nothing helped never tell anyone wouldn’t you’ve above lecture don’t give asked pointed enormous orange duckbill center how lambeosaurus differs dinosaurs we’ve studied repressed sigh flashed an image card front display glanced entered photographic recorded every detail recited facts twisted scowl classmates’ grow increasingly sour weren’t fans resident child prodigy called curvebuster finished answer grumbled sounded  know-it-all stalked exhibit next over follow thin separating two rooms block muffled grabbed little relief nice job superfreak garwin chang boy wearing t-shirt said i’m gonna fart sneered shoved past join they’ll write another article child teaches lame-o-saurus still bitter yale had offered full scholarship rejection letter arrived few weeks allowed go parents much pressure young end discussion so attending closer smaller san diego college year fact some annoying reporter newsworthy enough post local paper chooses ivy league complete photo freaked wasn’t strong word more half rules unnecessary front-page articles pretty worst nightmare they’d newspaper complain editor seemed unhappy story run place on arsonist terrorizing trying figure mistake bizarre white-hot flames smelled burnt sugar took priority everything especially unimportant girl most ignore or used caught sight tall dark-haired reading yesterday’s embarrassing black-and-white looked seen particular shade teal smooth sea glass beach glittered flickered expression gaze disappointment decide shrugged leaning closed distance between smile belonged movie screen heart did weird fluttery thing is pointing picture nodded feeling tongue-tied fifteen far cutest talking i thought squinted brown uh yeah sure say reason felt conversation accent british somehow crisper which bothered know are suck words soon left mouth course boys cute made mushy perfect returned told hulking greenish standing albertosaurus all its lizardesque glory me do think that’s it’s absurd

isn’t see saw small t rex: big teeth ridiculously short arms fine laughed i’ll get meet turned leave just classes kindergartners barreled fossil crushing screaming knock step whole realm pain kids’ stinging high-pitched needles many once angry porcupine attacking hands darted rubbing temples ease stabbings skull remembered alone reaction locked forehead pained imagined seconds hushed blood drain mean created plenty racket shrieks squeals giggles plus sixty individual chattering away gasped solved earlier everyone boy’s distinct accented speaking totally completely silent possible whispered widened moved whisper telepath flinched skin itch gave can’t believe backed exit reveal total stranger okay holding sort wild animal calm afraid froze my name’s fitz added stepping name searching sign part joke joking thinking wobbled spent seven find someone else world tilted sideways steady here looking twelve we better question: want air jerked bolted door stumbling shaky legs rhythm sucked breaths ran down stairs burned lungs bits ash flew ignored wanted space strange come shouted picked pace raced courtyard base steps wide fountain grassy knolls sidewalk got inside because poor quality footsteps gaining wait pouring energy sprint fighting urge glance shoulder halfway crosswalk sound screeching tires reminded both ways terrified driver struggling stop car plowed right die second blur swerved missing inches jumped curb sideswiped streetlight heavy steel lantern cracked plummeted instincts hand shot pulling strength somewhere deep gut pushing fingertips force collide falling gripping extension arm dust settled floated feel weighed ton put familiar warned bringing trance shrieked dropped without hurtled watch yanking split crashed ground impact knocked tumbled body broke fall landed chest stretched flurry questions swirling coherent idea sat replaying sense need witnessed miracle tighten panic let’s overwhelmed plan resist street reached intersection north zoo where crowd during firestorm running missed hearing changed terrifying scenarios involved government agents throwing dark vans experiments watched road ready bolt anything suspicious zoo’s massive parking lot relaxed outside milling cars happen witnesses slowed walk breath promise sincere easier opened hesitated supposed am trust won’t considered father sent specific age observe report always talk frowned disappointed himself does means expected threw what’s wrong touched eyelids suddenly selfconscious figured again awe us stopped whoa hang ‘one us’ frowning spotted fanny-pack-wearing within earshot deserted corner ducking green minivan there’s easy we’re human stunned speak hysterical laugh escaped repeated shaking riiiiiight insane trusting kicked stomped telling truth minute last listen plea humans vanished gone reeling leaned argued taking clear set pole minutes ago almost three managed finally saying alien erupted laugher cheeks grew hot also relieved compose elf hung foreign object belong visions tights pointy ears danced giggling expect guess stick wavy spikes rock star good crazy agreed refused serious frodo ring save middle-earth toys hid corners showed oh ought folded slender silver wand intricate carvings etched sides tip round crystal sparkled sunlight magic asking rolled actually pathfinder spun latch top dangerous you’ll faded depends take concentrate matter happens proof prove whisk land curious harm someone’s willed palms sweat fingers laced stupid tingled everywhere scanning warning look scowled bit tongue concentrated racing seriously become those silly girls counted raising facet beam refracted tightened grip forward warm tingling million feathers swelling underneath tickling giggle melted goo keeping oozing blanket warmth wrapped faster blink eye might squeaked stood edge glassy river lined impossibly trees fanning emerald leaves among puffy clouds row castles walt disney throw rocks kingdom golden path led sprawling elaborate domed buildings built brick-size jewels each structure color snowcapped mountains surrounded lush valley crisp cool

cinnamon chocolate sunshine places exist less appear forgotten released realized hard squeezing unable castle towers oddly our capital call eternalia heard shangri-la lost cities you’d stories rarely ridiculous things elves burst quiet gentle breeze brushing soft murmur traffic hammering unspoken very silence rising tiptoes view streets ghost town building towered others stones emeralds banner flying tribunal progress everyone’s watching proceedings council basically royalty holds broken law they’re deal laws well shook wrap cringing question funniest glared funny regained control try cling remaining strands sanity sun casting ray onto leaping hitched ride headed impossible infinite travel haven’t theory relativity stumped dumbest i’ve albert einstein huh dumb argue confident unnerving harder waited feather sensation dryer scattering directions until rubber band later shivering ocean whipping glowed carved moonlight failed passed bring herself true science book read confused observed ‘hey learned smug grin best minds begin comprehend complexities reality elves’ ahead slowest trump proper education shoulders sagged sank four scenery blurred whether tears entire lie nudged hey fault believed taught i’d done works bells chimed large gateway floor-length velvet capes draped tunics emerged followed creatures marching military formation rocky pants muscles prominently flat noses coarse gray pleated folds armadillo goblins signed treaty hating trembling dressed forbidden lumenaria worlds gnomes dwarves ogres trolls mentioning focused motioned farther squatting betrayed ancient councillors intelligent rule planning war ancients violence disappeared forbid any contact devices working defend race famine problems chilled frigid wind licking who’d known must’ve after eventually evolved myths simple yes peeked glowing crucial identity clicked spinning thousand loud clang gate stepped shadows sleek cobalt home jolted mom bus bland boring stole incredible blinding swept smoky fresh surprised recognized plain square houses narrow tree-lined house ask lived coughed handle putting pollutes planet these aren’t normal chemical smells usually wildfires smell barbecue melting cotton candy burn rain arsonists admitted pocket hoping notice dad wants knows neither important meant mystery he’s happy careful please shown today thank act family doesn’t suspect squared courage telepaths special ability rarer ones thirteen six months corrected liking youngest manifest start reverberated scanned positive waking hospital moment forget hooked kinds machines hovering shouting barely separate hold happening group adults haunted worry brows narrowed doing extra private keep wall weak hated bossed answering concerned action worked imagining stretching shadow mine blurted pale process hardest worries live fumbled answers long trouble knees link amazing will tomorrow panicked battered cluttered living phone she’s receiver having reeled daggers calling wandering worried police sorry stammered convincing horrible liar scared mom’s anger concern nervously curly guy realizing lies based freaking walked trolley train teacher guard ugh complained closing adult rubbed wrinkle appeared stressed upset safe stand weirdo understood dangers teased tormented bullied deflate wish trailed close rest sister slipped pin painful tight hug welcome honey dinner ten amy upstairs kitchen unease twist stomach worn linoleum pastel tacky knickknacks ordinary glittering kissed cheek shabby briefcase table how’s soybean wink baby apparently pronouncing thousands times lid simmering pots garlic cream filled handed silverware turn crackin’ scooted plopped usual chair nine role mastered opposite lower average grades popularity sisters wondered definitely powers lowered breathing: inhale exhale repeat care nickname dizzy must lay should eat skipping acting fettuccine night favorite rich sauce sudden nausea tug eyelashes chewed bite swallow fork official thanks great homework sprinted bed hiss shattered marty pounding fluffy cat sitting tail slunk settling lap marty’s purring

confront downstairs settle explained blonde chubby brunette screamed throbbed deeper ripped apart blinked related change lots adopted poked brought e l fudges plate cookies milk getting sick palm fever tired cookie stumbled routine crawled blankets wrapping pillow dreams kissing tucked tradition breathe ella yep elephant stuffed sleep tonight um guys hugged tighter hours labor endured switched birth daughter doubt wondering anymore dreamed keebler perfected recipes liked oreos drown vat fudge woke overrated morning quick shower jeans shirt buttery yellow stripes item closet self-conscious wear gold flecks admit clipped toyed lip gloss snuck check crept yard blinking stuck contained next-door neighbor perch middle lawn forkle rearranging garden tableaux nosy checking effect beady bored hers loved sentences complaining 911 obligated gnome fraction inch gives headaches yapping interrupted ball fur streaked barking spandex jogging shorts chased grabbing dog leash clumsy lunge kneeled stroking wild-eyed panting creature drew growled strained mad sister’s hates displaying several halfmoon wounds bleeding scar suppose willing carry blocks seems winked piercing certainly yelled jogger guy’s louder chaos wonder grab drag should’ve trick react stopping tracks side man straightened height quite intimidating ordered glowered promised snorted grumbling moving explaining whenever appearance waiting incident eyewitnesses frustrating confusing bell rang lurking scream demanded loudly heads bad flashing cocky rush blush unanswered tries creepy snatch slow replayed scene remember growling forkle’s quietly quieter we’ll we’d eyeing suspected impending mischief leap english ditch yesterday strangle pull disappearing fail willingly use telepathy brushed whispering pushed further test tested permission assignment frustrated matters invading offense scrunch nod movement nearby oak drowned could’ve sworn jogger’s campus gestured tree either imagine adjusted shouldn’t anyway who’s committee sidelong heat breaking automatically furious enjoyed caused determines grinned future shield surveyed surroundings metal nearly everglen leading doors absorbs directly likes privacy stressful doubted king kong faint click swung inward striking clearing growing midnight cape fastened clasp diamond-encrusted wings lean vibrant resemblance alden introduced bow curtsy shake greet shy pleasure prominent kidding unusual flush smiled embarrassed fire alden’s injury muttered son shared kidnapping considering such might’ve paranoid has touch rude assure love kidnapper searched reassure kindness agree placed gently jacket ticked indeed fascinating sounding triumphant perfectly specifically nexus forgot covered dug cuff coat clamped bracelet wrist twisting fit snug comfortable accessory single jewel rectangle symbols letters spelled gibberish odd decorate finality safety precaution break particles carried concentration circumstances bare early fools overestimate skills fade cautious answered lose yourself able fully reform pulls forever goose bumps dimple cleared throat prefer reproving send mission collect long-lost guests wiped blooming red pink purple rainbow perfume flowers dizzying testing qualify foxfire paused fungus insulted prestigious academy named represents glow darkened comes ‘fungus’ strongest talent kiss goodbye excuse proud attend accomplishment earliest levels develops abilities continue studies elvin sneak work knowingly chills mixed night’s troubling revelation sickening councillor bronte difficult impress feels upbringing lack disqualify surprises existed miffed votes squat brown-skinned huge tended fairy tale plants slantways shuffled carrying basket twinkling fruit guessing pictured men hats statues servants stare choose safer gardens enjoy privileged taste gnomish produce lunch treat dig slimy tubers slugs hoped menu peeled meadow elegant manor entirely intricately numerous turrets gables rose tower resembled lighthouse braided foyer prism widest hallway fountains spouted streams colored water hall dead-ended encrusted jeweled mosaic

diamond unicorns amethyst spoke wealth squeezed formal dining sheer silk curtains drawing chandelier waterfall shimmering crystals platters fancy goblets figures jewel-encrusted circlets plush thronelike chairs surrounding curtsied necks clasps keys horribly underdressed fabrics except disguise kenric oralie football player toothy princess rosy ringlets met smallest cropped features finger pairs floor laughter squirmed joined pleased shape it’ll transformed noticing autorepeat: scooting oralie’s one’s died yet hurt immortal trace sorrow bodies aging reach adulthood wrinkles belongs yourselves guest uncovered grimace strips glop goop tasted juiciest cheeseburger stuff mashed carnissa root umber leaf tastes chicken animals tone ate toxic waste squirming grimaced vegetarians horror vegetables cheeseburgers tells swallowed mouthful thud discussing openly respond kenric’s jaws dry remembering warnings stay begun eight pass mentioned learn relax bronte’s icy gust common announced jaw flushing chagrined incredulous impenetrable key sentence ‘almost breached guilt conscience sounds infallible thinks likely exceptionally lift weight telekinesis recovering embarrassment shrank goblet accident raised lifting invisible scoffed unimpressed limitations unlike physical confidence clue giving blew pretending imaginary extend sharper worth saucers applauded excellent praise couple glasses determined stronger ounce core empty collective gasp including breathed celebrate cramped strain knocking thunderous collision open-mouthed shock hollered sealed clapped language guys’ enlightened leaped instinctive interesting babbling teasing noisy gripped ‘soybean’ mispronouncing blushed chuckled beside dusting waved insisted sighed suldreen stretch line rare species bird puzzle solve uncomfortable coincidence convince decision barked shoving moonlarks vote otherwise fight favor final fragile lovely empath emotions extended grasped delicate fear confusion sincerity describe azure settles revisited till adjust invoke demand probe planned arranged quinlin busy decipher fun training looks iffy ‘bothered’ dad’s reluctant emptiness exploded choked saving colder implications ditched stall punishment atlantis nowhere patch white-capped waves signs seagulls screech poop hardly continent tide pool triangular slip slick shoes match gown begged status noble members nobility offices empire waist beaded neckline dress costume seeing clothes: tunic embroidery edges pockets sewn sleeves exact size sit boots completed thankfully knowing biana comparison changing subject ledge engineered catastrophe compartment revealing bottles label bottle whirlpool uncorked flung blast whipped faces roar churning ladies suggested worse gulped maelstrom beneath salty sprayed jump push count dignity drowning flailing idiot formed tunnel dipping weaving craziest waterslide starting launched vortex sponge licked toe pack kittens minus kitten sprang cushion smoothed wet incoming rocketed slightly squishy packed sand gleaming metropolis dome beyond soared skyline bathing radiating spires network canals interconnected arched bridges pictures venice modern clean despite bottom underwater muted hum background seashell ear build stores power precisely amount changes plated reflect firelight illuminate sink wandered shops renaissance fair women’s gowns shifted advertised two-for-one specials bottled lightning fast approval spyball applications strolled hybrid chicken-lizard invented main canal hailed carriages floating almond-shaped boat rows high-backed benches elbow-length steered bench reins skimming surface eight-foot-long scorpion deadly pincers reared curled sting eurypterid stroked shiny shell eurypterid’s slice emitting low hissing petted harmless carriage quinlin’s yours fiber mutant insect doom probed gritted pressing hideous sonden’s office thrashed heebie-jeebies commute while secure needs protection file highly classified business district windows tracing bearing names treasury registry interspeciesial services unreadable random strings runes nonsense writing

alphabet clueless chin jumble nah affected gap kid option country tests dropping member broad kelp ornamentation precise read: sonden: chief mentalist cube swiped elbow ping assurances humiliating bypassed receptionist dim damp stone desk dark-skinned chin-length seat ceremony unique understatement squirm handing lick dna unsanitary tiniest hologram center: rotating unearthly breathing prentice sacrificed double helixes sacrifice reasons fears hundred seventy-eight murmured began pacing invaded she’ll greatest keeper older midstep record share trained charge protecting currently hidden karaoke game sing off-key notes clearly eavesdropping strip slid winding stairway climbed oval footage brush projected chill aerial southern california lines circle area images deepened valleys ruled reflections note interrupting communicate waving warn turning overreacting glancing shuddered desperate kidnapper’s threatened easily implied nameless faceless entity quickly threatening authorities would’ve shivered accelerant chemicals leads lighting spilling oil blowing investigate council’s position here: takes visit babysitter decent equally spying steam secrecy existence discovered hoax search updated slight bypassing distracted evillooking matches keepers lagoon glint shimmery dunes lake west shore statue topped hollow iridescent film shimmered loop apparatus resemble bubble lifted clung shrieking levitate forming touching bubble’s rumble coming geyser shoot eleven crash below bobbed where’s scary pure joy popped whisked glaring gates flash strode olive contrast youth shone nerve summoning personal shorter intimidated difference sooner exiled clench fists backward tiergan aware opinion summoned convinced tiergan’s fierce crumbled crossing expert inventory widening whatever foxfire’s newest mentor puppy officially weirding becomes provide retired given persuaded return resentment mixture surprise hone assistance reasonable restrictions pretend opportunity silencing bet terrible mood mumbling mostly irresponsible manage choice benefit stares notify dame alina returning kept bruise meantime session listed remedial schedule lessons dummies correct assumption warmed tuesday brilliant panel everglen’s grounds sessions study student subjects one-on-one nerves one-onone succeed mention level grade relearning self-doubt heavier fragmented disappear explanation aside pleasant dis arguing overstuffed armchairs woman squealed snickered wife della pinched gesturing dear vanishers smiling musical hint della’s beauty tossed pursed heart-shaped parents’ combined gangly troll interceded borrow errands frumpy files requested denied request approve grady edaline case torn radiant parcels strobe unwrapped packages clasped cord neck choker pendant elf-y anytime fund’s activated fund register money standard dollars lusters laughing luster dollar crinkled ew insult afford differently limited seventy eighty makes sad curved window overlooking silvery floor-to-ceiling aquarium wingback facing piled books scrolls anxiety remind stacks newspapers circled crossed news removed drawer theories irritation super stuttered discuss faced solution allow ours they’ve effective immediately too-simple accept kick constant discovery longer unbearable loneliness friends grasping overwhelm areas access severely restricted dead deciding gravestones became vivid: grave tearstained draw suffer struck complicated relocated jobs erase tear obvious believing shutting function erased armchair scrubbed forbade sob occurred risking twenty alert plans clothes sees wiping focus bent unshed horrors cringed buried trembled bouncing busted eavesdrop grounded hugging worrying pouted pettiness bratty obnoxious pain-in-the-butt embrace struggles play daughters mouths senses hook hurry daze rememorize room: dusty available quilt mother tripped furry crouching releasing pathetic meow disk sleeping gas release drugging physically ill backpack slung giggled elizabeth clutching anywhere couch fingered ordering thirty crumpled burying recognize crouched smearing drool snot drugged sobs

overcame jerk washers bags regret bear slept finish hawaiian family’s limp determination taken fourteen cried assured stranglehold haunting gets hope personally oversee relocation flared wrung guardians title selected enthusiasm strangers elwin’s blue-crystaled temptation shiver raked bones orphan conservatory lead backyard security choosing saved ache suffering gift raise ended abandoned wipe elwin physician medical hate doctors brave regular nightmares brief stays struggled dragging direction drop free implying biana’s glare escape punch bathed gigantic glued cushioned cot syringe goes fidget spectacles scientist snapped painless orb flasher manipulate skilled orem vacker show eclipse biggest celebrations traditions damage permanent tensed food chance innocent cells dashing depending orbs squinting lenses stunningly lit dramatic expecting toxins research rifled satchel vials liquids major detox braced medicine syrups nectar unknown fruits tingly drink youth legends enzymes essential health refreshing downed contents gulp drank medicines list follow-up checkup whistled sometimes heated lame stinky stegosaurus shame horrified production wimp doctor phobia jumping needle strap bunch shots allergic how’d concrete nine-one-one unconscious genes kicking trigger bedroom canopied chandeliers room’s gotten deserve ruined chanting mantra shut pajamas tuck asleep belonging alive twenty-five catch breakfast clock shop furniture detoxes materializing clutched ghostly exotic heartbreaker fitted glamorous shopping explosion behold wardrobe outfits extras pick beat-up sparkly casual packing leaked days unpack hungry knotted sadly dampened preserve havenfield exciting jolie deny loss wonderful booming fenced-in pastures spread scrambled versions rehabilitation centers sanctuary protected trap nessie artist endangered gorillas lions mammoths extinct thriving herd woolly colonies saber-toothed tigers slack exists rob qualities provides thrive feeding hunt diet steep cliffs caves flower-lined using ropes lasso lizard neon beast protest drama queen husky male commanded beast’s heave feat twice snaarrll bucked guardian lunged tangled writhed losing balance verdi tyrannosaurus comments meeting jaculus winged serpent feeds support contain bloodsucking snake claws snout tremble lowering fangs glinted slobber motioning glimpse dinosaur-riding chiseled feather-covered james bond robin hood balding relate handsome feathery banged pet rub rex’s stayed docile unblinking separated verdi’s wound plugged slime death rot tuna fish combination kelpie dung bites jar swear edaline’s grady’s wary compared palatial estate mansion standards columns cupola roof entryway central upper floors cascaded ceiling wispy fabric turquoise amber curls similar circles fluff presentable rex picking playing rodeo cowboy nope wash staircase sadness lingered tea mallowmelt insist gooey cake fresh-baked chip soaked ice frosting butterscotch dripping hasty slices served nook grazing linens painted china homesick woken lushberry juice pop possessed conjurer form teleporting objects coolest unfortunately scraggly slurps burps letting friend’s ached grieve fished imparter simply strangled pounded reassuring deafening third star-shaped dangled glittery weaved carpet scent canopy occupied dressing bookshelves brightly volumes bathroom bathtub swimming biting awesome assumed jolie’s tour awkward delicious soupy pizza unpacking wrinkled scrapbook wherever welled remnants dried sixteen sunrise streaks blending mirror darken awake finishing hovered doorway interrupt riser shades clap bruises conjured bowl spoon banana bread tempted impose sloppy handwriting upside symbol corner: bird’s beak tickled babble scare extremely documents cipher moisture particularly believable prescribed drawn eager fidgeting ruffles simplest bought hi kesler groaned island mysterium identical mold vendors spices sweets buzzed crowded sidewalks working-class social rank ‘talent simpler correspondingly unfair born lesser lives type designed village avoiding whispers ruewen pretended different

store crooked nursery rhyme burps: merry apothecary belched maze shelves pills laboratory beakers bubbling burners rainbow-colored lab skinny tousled strawberry periwinkle blob tubes add amarallitine dex tongs vial experiment poured beaker sparked plume dirty gag concoction exclaimed hello ‘hello impersonation sludge eda scrap sheet kesler’s brother-in-law nephew practically monday al freaks dimples burped beanpole hooded cloak vika annoyance handiwork written girl’s bald scalp meanwhile stina ’cause twitched battling sell solutions sasquatch dent bony appendages children throttle hairoids stock week wailed ogre wicked misses responsible friendly rage here’s spat helping customers potent hat flinch useless buy countered retort stina’s oooh slammed fist timkin heks helps situation traditional absolutely brings stuffy nobles happier grinning mess tweak supplies armful worktable sneaky beard dex’s evil mortar pestle teach tingle attempt fifty-seven solo property collapse practiced checked displayed sliver percent chose he’ll hawk mentors monitor weakness expelled pushes transferred exillium swallowing bile mounting attack messy juline riveted gossip interruption interest hilarious bookshelf mounted cover camera summer flipping pages naked mouse suit disneyland dizznee photos honestly movies outlets flipped technology solar powered rifling sir conley’s luck lady galvin highest rate rig calming flooded seventeen gadgets chimes arrive uniform skirt leggings shirt-vest-cape combo laceup jerkin long-sleeved slacks waist-length superhero captain blueberry rescue meaning order demonstrate rid wimpy halcyon mastodons mascot birds storm mastodon ceremonies costumes glad idiots appealing crest triangle heart: scarlet eagle soaring talons chemistry equipment theirs adopting adoption adopt temporary enrollment manticore themselves parties dies span cope calmed orphans wylie whose recover connection blames wylie’s hanging leapmaster 500 lucky authorized 250 tons rotated five-story pyramid sharply angled u stained seventh amphitheater extensive fields grass hopelessly prodigies uniforms building’s finding ducked starts orientation principal reads announcements attendance collar track peal close-up stunning porcelain caramel-colored foremost whoever reekrod weekend mark punished fullest extent threat dangle continued detect ah spotlight hissed viper’s nest ssssssophie hole crawl concludes today’s nearest exception divided wing banners bore midflight halls quad throughout sparkling sapphire chatted doorways lining atrium spectacle creating marked rune locker mirrored lock uses gross faculty picks flavors pepper sneeze croak yelped stench rotten eggs dash diaper muskog wheezy snicker whirled towering mass frizzy cackling hags stalking hairs shave earth serum friday retorted raven swishing behavior phasers ashamed apologize obviously spend detention alexine stinks beet minions kinda frog fumes catching jensi rapid-fire speech talked buckets redder instructed honest ‘human girl’ ‘sophie’ whim elementalism pride backtracked twists turns drops warped wooden session’s zapped ‘zapped’ thunderclap eighteen tray electrocuted quiver conley hitting fluted botched sending tornado tornadoes mastering elements entering foods series stalls court mall recognizable eaten tables cafeteria whom discourage joining verge perceptible message clear: focusing bigger jensi’s acne braces fairly slicked greasy ponytails drooled setting bang c’mon dude unison ‘e’ duh drooly volunteered singed universe daunting exaggerated messing ‘dude’ killing explode cough pixielike rescuing tossing petite balled braids suicide overeager marella mare nicknames obeyed enemies honored pucker licorice lemon fan prettypants rather grumpy brat brother’s dreamy willpower copying sip looped defending dizznees triplets says ‘bad match’ genetically incompatible inferior aunt uncle superstrange celebrities famous vackers superimportant marella’s sympathy grandma heartbroken helpless veins hopeless cases guarantee scooping mammoth shudder awful afternoon feared astronomical

learning astin whispery complex maps planetarium effortless excelled hour survived approaching dragon hateful invited feelings letters: extinguished stuffing fill animosity deck ‘nice uncanny royal highness bothers remembers talented ‘deck beaming nineteen thursday disaster goal sandwiched colosseum pe vanity near door: sneakers ponytail owned ship slap reply lasted compare redek squish may fool stops idle threats grouped twos tromps manifested fifty-fifty manifesting mysterious remark required variable reign terror ‘everyone’ impressive jolt supervise caton titan god informed channeling supereasy channel parts body: heights speeds normally unimpressive attempts threes bumped defense appetite startled spaceship unremarkable studying superintently snapping scraping probing concept unsettling establish forcing eighty-seven puckered brow assume cheerful scraped intended drained steadying suggest ethics attached meganeura exercise annoy fidgeted cocked wanna buzzing dived vulture-size dragonflies patted freaky-looking bug blown gargantuan proportions creepiest disco balls grown monster enclosure phys ed intense emergency weirdest part: proven trustworthy receive assignments lectured responsibility detecting discover elite avoided mesmer nauseated wow sheesh inflicting curiosity won causes dara lecture: pyramids tidal army hairy hollowing himalayas strangest mumble creeped exile interested dying supertalented fundamental guilty underground eternity ruin fluke churned abandoning illegal washer alter dump brother secluded sorted reminding effort flavored flumes spritzed shove disturbing failing smirked alchemy pupil encouraging cracking melody ominous ingredients trophies gilded items pointy-toed suspiciously midas milky liquid dancing rushing rustle red-brown updo hunter silky decorated patterns swished slightest alkahest universal solvent stored itself dissolves wood flesh taxes substance alchemist wise teaching masters tincture poultice basic serums yellowed box flask jars iron transmuting metals recipe formula labeled instructions fiddled rechecked mistakes plunged whip fizzed rumbled jelly galvin’s exquisite dissolved luxurious damaged salvage welt healing ma’am murder retrieve afterward muttering incompetence flunk sprawled hallways stark ditching keefe gulon disheveled untucked popular belva crush blame 90 certain paid accidentally cue epic alina’s ugly crying treated whiter phobia consisted rooms: treatment beds brewing physician’s paperwork slinky scurried bullhorn demented ferret banshee adorable fellow dramatically wanting seize mmm-hmm acid mimed effects destroyed salve measured whap wash present laughs clarification confirming twenty-one embellished version destruction joked bottling anwen multispeciesial 324 faxon metaphysics complimented requests brown-eye create overnight granted incredibly challenging explosions occurrence unlearn lifetime knowledge levitating rainbows constantly messed highlight skill effortlessly amazed unwanted transmit else’s psychic photograph needing patient plague suspicion snotty maruca i-hate-sophiefoster club reaching growl jealous prettiest bedlam subdue chasing rabbits antlers swinging trunk lump verminion pen boosted mammoth’s trumpeted earthshaking squeal ringing mound timid twig hiiiissssssssssss uncurled rodent bulging hamsters rottweiler-size hamsterzilla trample japanese hamster cooed snaarrrlll impressed chase steer dashed catches fifty stupidest clod mud nailed grooowwwwllll fatal flaw pinned grunted press snarling squeeze verminion’s unlocked assortment spewed whined pile gloves shed trade trudged oversize squirrels rats identify burlap sack quivering snarl steeled shriek batlike heaved wool scratches leg outbuildings carefully organized veterinarian’s laid sterile spreading limbs smeared eyedropper dripped creature’s rewarded squeaky rumbling crackly purr smiles cage barrel soapy chain-sawesque snores vibrating brattail tuber sausage imp guessed six-inch venomous stings snoring vicious describing tame yetis outnumbered conked chipper iggy strand swell

generous hugs touches gestures glistened dubious trails twenty-two sharing congested warthog roommate snuggly sleepless spoil caring ultimate splotching championship sacks cheered sympathetic secretly celebrating partnered naturally teamed splotcher splattered loses winners person wins marks smugly win splotch splat deserved colorful prize contest pardon hopes wonderboy gagging rounds beat opponent knots backing aim ow raw telekinetic flushed compliment disqualifies pumped victory hotter cheering opponents experience duel beginner’s talents mighty competition grumblings battle odds experienced evidently four: sixes trella dempsey paired hopeful muster bested winner fluttered appears competitors betraying butt preference keefe’s chant ladies’ float clenched adrenaline surged audience back-up splotches rebound phenomenon weightless collided simultaneous fate collapsed twenty-three placing compress wincing muscle injured whermiwhahapped worse: laying banshees mortal danger stirred lucid winced stiff glands zinged collected rebounded bounce specialized hammered controls actual mix matched draining practice evenly awfully sidelines wobbling auditorium applause teensy annoyed copied blushing elbowing ribs tie protested declared excused lesson rejoin splotchers acted delivered p congratulations confirm bath lathering bathers soggy instinctively besides creased drive twenty-four meter one-third younger that’d wonderboy’s precious midterms score seventy-five recommend nissa tutoring consider tutor projection gagged flavor yell daily tore prattle chewy caramel peanut butter pouch cracker jack horse mane prattles’ unicorn pins collection examined digital 122 185 number eighty-five super-rare bitterness vaguely compute unexpected development century too-little-too-late branch other’s replaced beeline simultaneously sniff aw stuck-up snob wasted invite humiliate walking ambush capable teeniest details clanged cricket chirped embroidered satin sash wringing exhaled seeming makeovers wrestling polite fortunately braid flutter dirt pitter-patter eh sayin’ shooting quest grateful team jealousy guarded raid questers tagged sentry tabs isolate general nail targets listened softer instantly presence tremendous connected forest thundered vision racked credible crashing bushes partner deceive insists hasn’t secrets toes staying chain apologizing visitors sulking funk snipe wagged there’ve weekly jokes havenfield’s defied exams panicking passing guide narrowing shipped exam brass copper transmutations ideas challenges thwarted spilled gashrooms reek pored frozen cause shattering cheated accomplished cheat ideal dreading twenty-six tri-angular apex streamed pane angle reflection examining confessed forgave neutral violated ethical regulations expulsion suggesting argument ruling obey flourish bother violating reporting stifle closely icily respect authority advises wedding flapped nor pointless cheating tolerated huffed regrets confess serve minimum assigning becoming theme slipping unnoticed what’d gloomy atmosphere desks thumbs-up siren song appreciation art nature clapping earsplittingly shrill whine whale nails chalkboard toddler uncover broadening horizons claiming repentant company brand torture ballroom belva’s sirens dances edwardian claimed valin ponytailed promenade dancers valin’s sweaty chime stars shined brighter spit wickedly slobbery octaves fanned hmm irritated flattered scored points empathy forked smirk ironing holes stack detained increased practicing leaps eyebrow empaths powerful mundane purification vein easiest transmutation lockers traded twenty-seven banging annoyingly caps disqualified chorus groans nonstop cap smurf amalgam telepathic integrity wrote essay betrayal over debate automatic 100 last-minute mentally repeating tips negative vibes stress ethic claim fame skipped skip supportive doubting brag mercifully stalled magenta berries rusty discipline chosen purify ruckleberries fifty-five nasty impurities elderly human’s alchemists methods dive knife pierced berry dribbled pinky haggard glacial quarters

deducted mediocre performance forth whirlwind crack exhausted brutal slamming slumped that’ll public hooks presents spine cards schools hassle babysitters edged obstacle tugging stressing rigid suitable gifts jewelry charms charm twenty-eight unrecognizable streamers shrub toilet-papered tinsel confetti bubbles prizes popping appointment teal-wrapped package uglier hurrying plowing regain literally prying trademark smirks spoken sapphire-encrusted navy-blue intently hairstyle contrasted pristine infamous deflated wilted father’s oily insincerity resigned flame cassius lord performing unremarkably radiated apologies fos er disappointing scores fake critical said: creeps prize-filled prattles dwarf lollipop topple snappy comeback comment loser fails organize overflowing half-empty month misunderstanding shushed slim parcel chiming signaled parent-mentor conferences celebration feast unwrap snatching self ‘dear dance sometime vice president boyfriend rattled reader tease ribbon tapped gadget fingernail speaker thingies coloring dunno disbelief variety edible glosses speckled spider snapper plant fed spiders riddler writes riddle miniature violet thanked showing misty seventy-nine improvement range sensing tomato congratulated comfort sobbing partying included sneer party note: f snap k sugarplums boy-craziness necklace cuffs wristbands vanisher platter customs gelled perfection gym ornate immaculate alvar talks often rumpling fizzleberry wine juggling girlfriends hero beamed piddly quicksnuff emissaries tend conspiracy possibility myself pieced undivided swan’s curve pattern term replied active recently unauthorized investigation frustration twenty-nine alternate spending smelling clues accomplish consumed trapped counting resumed vacation finals received eighty-one eighty-three unacceptable prepared chorused poufy thrown towel drooped oven roasted frosters transmitting charts transmitted peed suffered rested cryokinetics freeze manipulating pyrokinesis mesmers inflictors monitored pyrokinetics inflict fire’s unpredictable truly forbidding pyrokinetic library surely three’s librarian banned archives libraries bust problem: section dire wolves peek promising bins mountain littered haphazardly spaces scan unrolled flip papers helpful lacy dulled childhood: strung lanyards dolls framed bone picture: breathtaking tragedy drinking leftover junk trunks piles unopened bin disturbed murky midterm roll scroll shelf sample starlight moonglade: fireflies flickering stellarscope upside-down spyglass view’s billions wad tag amaranthis memorized fourth lambentine bag spout wider scope knobs cluster dials stiffened lever thumb clinked rubini orroro azulejo cobretola indigeen scratching spectrum rearranged indigo zelenie isolated this’ll bluff scrounging elementine adjusting fidgety hummed shining teared welts frantic thirty-one blackish-purple blisters pot burns sprinkled powder adventure soaking numbs balm miserably regulate temperature palace crown nicer handful roots mutilating blades destroying bashing stubbornness reappeared ointment knelt furrowed fingertip rags longest hottest soapiest griffins discreetly boring-looking firecatching bode bundle solid downright incoherently darkly quintessence fifth element myth truest conditions blow metallic-toned bronze wildly flamed audible unmapped locations merit thirty-two platform thrones remotely procedure involving throne cushions tourmaline sturdy polished dotted onyx heard: clarette velia terik liora emery ramira darek noland zarina flicked mere evacuated three-thousand-year task undisclosed location trial salivating convict straighter dozen marched stationed bodyguards swordlike weapons belts fanfare blasted crowned amateurs seated sapphires shall world’s ungraceful consuming detector fuzzy lying endlessly jell-o hobbled astin’s honesty assigned emery’s argento auriferria pennisi merkariron styggis achromian slower plotting map cowering submit lists convenient judgment frightening hardened remained expressionless mediates telepathically consensus united aspirin unanimous

rise violates actions intentional accountable foster’s involvement addressing agreement millionth wished exchanged dimpling kiddo thirty-three banks sienna bark paintbrushes purfoliage palmae calls pures filter pollution freshest crispest tinge fuzzed hesitation observant instruction lurched sunset farthest councillors’ steadied emerald-encrusted circlet bowed pleasing honor beg refuse descryer response delightfully potential clamoring backfired speaks beginning optional 327 sensed crane sweeping peacock log dream softly regularly useful one-armed fiancé’s projecting vividly replace album dinner’s stroke retracted apology hurting tricks arches replica model thirty-four planted curl plotted page difficulties rivaled protect quieted los angeles hollywood trash conspicuous spider-man batman posed mann’s chinese theatre blended beams issued ‘forgot’ oblivious ourselves stubborn softened unwillingly seeped ‘got of’ ant pavement explore warring hurried consequences captured pleaded mercy prentice’s behalf oversaw shatters society metaphor insurgents rebellion kindest whatever’s decisions encouragement revelations ability-detecting exercises cornered superbusy insistent significant elf-ish onetime played envy tracked master tracking switch spots conspiracies investigating headway ignorance ever: permanently jarred conservation legitimate scientific principle nagging elixir nogginease limbium mineral supposedly resisted bike wheels giddy week’s supply unnaturally syrup absorb nauseating unfastening vest skin’s collapsing allergy dimmed cradling thirty-five fluttered chafed sandpaper wildhaired soothed sensations spectators cleaned vomit upright moaned allergies wits bullhorn’s trite soiled airtight vomiting swollen blotch-free humiliated undershirt noticeably absent dazzling alvar’s raptor disgusting decade spare injected steroids tied budge scolded showers heels crisis ushered deathly tough disasters blankly rests brothy soup elsewhere shadowy comforting yawn snuggled thirty-six squealing hundreds eagle-size pterodactyl somersaulted screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech stability rein speed momentum gained screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech torch pasture dispersed uncannily fried engulfed birdbath sparks jerking possess flareadon fire-resistant replay triggered animal’s cares octave higher killed resting flareadons volcanoes occur gildie strayed ‘flareadon female correcting wade debacle breaks wrestled socks shredded apparent vague emotion animals’ distances qualified lightened results defined iggy’s gildie’s paw tummy reward downy fury paled out-of-breath aura recoiling imperative vital violate risk humiliation fled her: cooperate freezing peered railing partial drifted bars errand thirty-seven mush nights begging blend processing forgetting tearing fluorescent locker: insider’s librarian’s timing shoe absolute librarians plastered sinking confirmed dog-ear chapter everblaze: unstoppable blind thirty-eight paper-strewn something’s ‘everblaze frissyn x stands detailed extinguish overruled excluded unheard indecision warred babies hatch extract unregistered code name: egg cast conventional purpose determine pregnant fertility posing implanted embryo manipulated outstanding retain discovering affects genetic anomaly renegades weapon ‘prodigy illegally forgiving messages suffocating choke word: controlled puppet issue triggers twilight proudly soothe facade crumble table: throaty fix drove wedge messenger delivering seal reseal rampaging limits chaise skimmed bead luminous nonluminous generated lumenite drilled clarify rip grubby paws riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip chunk possession skittered treasure retrieving tattered assess rug glue document accordance canceled thirty-nine heartbeat scrubbing choked-back muffle misery acknowledge gaping owe regardless charade  obeying command churn yeti ricocheted ooooookaaaaaaay slinking acknowledging attempting library-appropriate slothlike triple-check echoing phew scrutiny shrug candleshade overhead clipping playlist jarring numbness bass mature speakers bands sarcastic tune swirled seeping cracks triumphed

tiptoed rustled creaked padding crawling lonely forgive forty cheer stricken envelope headline: claims victims scrawl announcement corridor stark-white gulps sneaking suggestions weigh resolve admirer flood applying replacement heal eased uncertainty brothers recent discoveries recording spy undetected textbook dreaded licensed pathfinders restriction threatens ‘everblaze’ accusation fintan pricked balefire fintan’s requires fuel supported cosmic ‘fire ignite conclusive example surveillance ruining depths former dealing approved overrule objection trusted phantom rebels snatched emissary citizen confidential duly noted digging forty-one partly imprisoned sorting reminders pity tension distant lately preparing prejudice megacrush cave commands successful method unwrapping names: connor kate natalie freeman apply permit huddled thinner echoes evacuee note’s unquenchable abandon supporter afar forty-two stashed drawers ‘you threaten chaperone global dumped significance supplied clothing resistant fly willful punish facets stagger hills screeched tying pried displays seals survival glinting corneas swoop thickest raspy coughs locate singeing shift current overcome coughing inferno ouch thrashing clouded watery beads capped treats paced treating scorched angrier contorted squatted pee severe scalding plunked sticky-sweet healthy grim balled-up yelling homes camped affairs mesmerized desperation launching steal dumping tenderness justified reacts offer unintelligible agreeing concerns forty-three relatively illness actress w-what admitting lifeless freaky dumber connections traitorous resisting grasp peace decency furball storm’s appropriate cliff reveling shard clatter soothing relishing pulverized smithereens boulder violent frightened irrational fallen possibly smothered meaty cloaked swooped sickeningly nostrils sedative cursed rallied scuffle scuttled captor circulation rasped viselike lolled rescued forty-four bonds staging unfortunate complication fog scrambling muddled funerals pendants vise sweetness blackness necessary loomed constricted heaving choking gruff hyperventilating suffocates coated hacking nods croaked relocate stolen grunt syllable drugs mist strapped bound shivers eerie breathy wheeze venom trail gumption predicament footfalls disposed disappearance guts throb ignorant cackle toy reserve widen contorting poison ple clarity struggle overwhelming happiness rocked jostling rescuer foggy occasionally elevator altitude delirium parted flimsy fumbling promises caress weary forty-five searing heightened awareness sensory overload barrage cigarette butts alley surveying hideout interrogation kidnappers scoured alexandre desperately operates anyone’s him: upcoming rounded apologized broom peeking roofs yards landmark eiffel gaped graceful paris france french indian saris currency exchange robbing bank machine atm watches account measures ‘make work’ cameras covering buttons alarm bills robbed technopath froster internet café sandwiches cheese once-living boxy computers navigated web browser googled number-one result pont iii bridge seine lanterns shopkeeper sped excitement decorations horizon lamp nexuses lasts mathematics applied dawn forty-six melder stun evening strolls cloaks leader obscurer bends distortion coil rope goons goon pathways underestimate wire enhanced wishful swirl severing rapid duck whizzed seizure dusted flailed gurgling blank forefinger crescent shaped jagged cowl stumble scarred heft frenzy hatred writhing strengthened pumping pulse heavyset figure’s hideouts options battering crushed nearing tug-of-war lessened allowing glorious drift fading surrendered mind’s imagination funeral weariness overtaking hazy snow labored conscious sparkle freedom sweep forty-seven brightness peaceful wove persisted appeal surge newfound pooled aches splintered clearer enveloped strawberry-blond-haired numbing sedated tingles luxuriating gulping wetness numb shhh sniffled recognizing propped girly seasons faltered proves meaningful floppy snickers emergencies conversations flirting scratch

blasts streaking injuries concentration’s cell half-drained gaunt fleeing canceling flitted nuzzling scratched there’d yawned lights forty-eight covers washed sandor goblin bodyguard inflictor paralysis semiconscious incapacitated dormant trauma latent polyglot languages advance interrogated sandor’s bunny seven-foot-tall buffed-out overtime blindfolded seared monitoring proved arrested custody awaiting deaths tragic innocence error motivate condemning madness reluctance single-handedly now’s crescent-shaped recalled epiphany overweight swells digest explains operative guarding subliminal advantage activate developed who’ll address database detectives arson reigned supreme wisest greater questioned decades measure influential amok globe rejected imprison devastated uprooted supporters initiative resign outspoken recruited activity satisfied handled poorly kidnapped prisoner resolved disposal stamped justice voiced revenge birthday birthdays indefinite spans thirteen-year-old crushes plots rebellions grown-ups understands teenager accepted bargain relented insisting uncertain responding arrange forty-nine pedestal charges bylaws sub-bylaws committed transgressions minor tortured regal express safely accused drafting addressed firmly murmurs debated arguments raging attitude disrespectful rebellious overlooked gratitude however static rulers experiences inappropriate assign ‘already served’ sang admission din bursting provisional basis due aforementioned cannot proceed suggestion issues seats smoothing occasion fancier signaling require records indicate provided remain appreciated despised gladly nicely dipped textbooks someday squash toughest earn deserves murderous successfully fingering justifiably displeasure smirking retake propose alternative state events revealed therefore practical prudent career prospects shifting internal logical volatile qualifies majority erupting directing registered cuddly earned oneon-one immediate tangle concluded gathered twirling nudging trades sidestepped congratulate surviving multiple tribunals swirls diamonds feminine unlatch decides woven triply journey

#kotlc

[adorethedistance]

I Love You - Trevor Zegras x Reader (18+)

Hockey Masterlist

Warnings: swearing, SMUT, oral f!recieving, rough sex

Words: 1956

Summary: When Trevor accidentally lets it slip that he's in love with you, the heat of the moment confession turns into the fuck of a lifetime.

A/n: I wrote this piece in one sitting and decided to not proof it extensively lol. It's not bad tho so enjoy! Minors DNI pls pls pls

“Spiderman would not beat Captain Marvel in a fight!” I sit up to passionately declare to an amused yet startled Trevor. As I sit up to straddle his hips, he subconsciously draws his legs up to rest against my back. Trevor looks at me with gentle shock, clearly not expecting me to get so fired up about the statement he’d just made. 

I’d been laying with my head on his chest for a while as he and I talked about the wonders of growing up. Then, somehow, the topic of aspirations led to childhood, leading to superheroes, and now to hypothetical super battles. Once the initial shock wears off, Trevor’s eyes flash with stubborn delight and he pushes back.

“Spiderman would absolutely win.”

“Why?” I ask, preparing to deconstruct any argument he throws my way.

“He’s got Spidey-sense so his reflexes would be quicker.”

“Okay, that doesn’t mean shit!”

“Why not?!”

“Because Captain Marvel has actual powers and MCU spidey only has spidey-sense, which is really just mega anxiety.”

“No way!”

“You’re just mad because I’m right. JAMIE?!” I scream into the empty hallway. “Oh my god, wait, he’s not even here!” I begin wheezing laughing at my own brain fart. Trevor also begins to laugh, though it’s clear he’s laughing at both my wheeze and the embarrassing moment beforehand.

“I told you he’s out with some of the guys.”

“I forgot to ask, why didn’t you go with?”

“Because I wanted to see you,” he says as if that statement didn’t just make my heart swell a million times larger.

“Not that I don’t appreciate your choice, but you never miss guys’ day.”

“What? Yes, I do!”

“When?” At my question, Trevor pauses still trying to come up with an answer. “See?”

“Well, I’ve been trying to make more of an effort to spend time with you...”

“What? Why?”

“Because I love you!” Trevor and I both fall silent for a moment. Lips slightly parted in surprise.

“Did you just-?”

“I don’t think so-”

“You totally did!”

“Well…” He trails off again, “I do.”

Reaching forward, I extend both arms to hold his face and I lean down to kiss his lips. The kiss deepens as it lingers and I hum a happy sigh into the connection. Trevor finds our passionate rhythm and his hands that were originally resting on my waist trail down over my hips and onto my ass. I can feel him fighting a smile through the kiss, which causes me to smile. The small laughs between us are gone just as fast as they came, and I keep one hand on Trevor’s cheek while the other slips into his hair. Gripping my hand in the strands on his neck he moans softly into the kiss. 

The heat of the moment leads me to begin grinding down on him, desperate for any sort of friction that could provide release. I trace the tip of my tongue down his neck, nipping soft bits of his skin between my teeth. Trevor groans at the sensation in tandem with the movement of my hips. The sound is so erotic it makes me want to ravage him immediately. I pull off of his neck for a brief moment to mutter,

“Bedroom. Now.” And Trevor doesn’t need to be told twice. He sits up sliding one hand under my ass and the other across my back to carry me from the couch to his bedroom. I marvel at how strong he is, how effortless the motion is for him. Trevor tosses me down on his bed with ease, a lustful smirk occupying his features as he admires the sight of me between his unmade sheets. 

Before either of us can say a word, I’m tearing his sweatshirt and the soft baby tee underneath it, off of my feverish body. The choice to forego any kind of bra was purely coincidental. Or maybe I knew deep down that I needed him this bad. Regardless the action leaves us both topless, and his smirk now grows into a lustful grin. 

“Fucking hell, I’m a lucky guy,” Trevor says as he takes in the sight of my bare chest. I remain laying down but extend my hand to reach for him. Trevor takes the cue, interlacing our fingers before dropping his head to pull my right nipple into his mouth. I gasp softly as he sucks the hard bud, grazing the flesh with his teeth, causing me to moan fully. 

“Fuck.”

He puffs a small laugh of arrogance before harshly sucking a love bite into the side of my tit. He works quickly, placing a kiss on the mark once he’s finished before repeating the motion on my left side. I tangle both hands in the back of his hair. Gripping the tufts for my own expression of pleasure. My hands idly follow as he pulls off of my tits and leans up to kiss me once more. He sucks my bottom lip roughly before kissing his way down the length of my body.

The kissing ceases as he encounters the waistband of my pajama shorts. Hooking his fingers in the band he looks up, pausing for a moment to check in. I nod a fervent ‘yes’ and that’s all the encouragement he needs to yank off my shorts and my thong in one swift motion. He discards the clothing somewhere behind his body, staring down before meeting my eyes once more. He wordlessly quirks a brow. Such a fucking tease.

“Please,” I say, knowing exactly what he wants to hear. Trevor happily obliges, roughly lifting my legs. He braces himself with one hand on the underside of each of my thighs, pushing them so that my knees flank my marked breasts. His head dips lower. Licking the surface of my pussy with his wide tongue. I breathe out a pleasured sigh at the first contact. He continues licking up and down the length of my sex, lingering at the top to swirl his tongue on my clit. I moan softly at the action, causing him to swirl harder before sucking the sensitive bud into his mouth. 

“Ah, Trevor!” I whine as he continues to pleasure me. His hands drop from holding my thighs to then open me up more, momentarily pulling off of my clit. The right hand spreads my pussy apart while the left lifts from above; I shudder at the feeling of the crisp air against my exposed clit. He snickers darkly before licking the bud, causing me to cry out in pleasure.

“Oh fuck!” 

His pace quickens. The movement speeds up as I feel my high building further and further. And just as fast as he had begun, he pulls away from my core once more.

“Agh, you dick!” Trevor just laughs and fake pouts at me.

“What’s wrong?” He asks snarkily and I roll my eyes. The act is surrendered without much of a fight as Trevor unties the drawstring on his sweatpants and drops them. His boxers quickly follow; he's already the hardest he’s ever been. I sigh at the sight and then scooch further down the length of the bed. With my hips right on the edge of the mattress, he reaches down to slowly trace his tip through my slick folds. He moans at the initial contact. I can feel myself getting wetter as he does. The things this boy’s moans can do to me is humiliating.

Then, Trevor gently pushes the tip into my dripping hole. He takes a moment, allowing me to adjust to his size before pulling back out again. He fucks in and out of me with the tip until I whine out of impatience. Trevor takes the hint and without a moment to spare immediately pushes all the way inside me, bottoming out in one quick movement. I groan out a cry, relieved to feel him again, but desperately wanting more.

“Fuck me, please,” is all I have to say before he begins thrusting in and out. The pace of his thrusts are steady and wonderful. If I’d know he could fuck like this from the beginning, I wouldn’t have wasted time playing false modesty. He continues to fuck into me, moaning at the sensation in time with his thrusts. 

“Harder,” I sigh and Trevor merely smiles. He thrusts with a bit more force but I can tell he’s holding back. “It’s okay,” I say tauntingly, “You won’t break me.” Trevor seems ignited by the promise and begins to fuck harder and deeper. I loudly moan out with each thrust, reveling in the pleasure of feeling him inside me. 

I can feel  my orgasm building but before I can utter another encouragement he pulls out completely. “Wha-” I try to ask but Trevor quickly uses his impressive strength to rough flip me over. Laying face down, on my stomach, he grabs my legs and pulls me back to the edge of the bed. From where he stands, he pushes back in to fuck me harder and faster from behind. I cry out in immense pleasure and reach my right hand out behind me. Trevor interlaces our fingers and uses the position to pin that arm on my back, using that as leverage to go harder.

I could scream with how intense the pleasure is. As he continues fucking me I feel my high building once more. Trevor senses my peak through the way my pussy is clenching his dick, and he begins moaning louder at the sensation. Fucking faster and harder, he holds one hand on my back, the other on my shoulder to keep my from moving away from the end of the bed. I use my free hand to grip the fabric of his sheets in my fist. Each thrust gleaning a louder, more intense cry than before, building higher and higher.

“Oh my god, I’m gonna cum.” I squeak as he fucks me hard. The swelling mix of his pants and moans indicate he’s also close. 

“Fuck. Me too, babygirl.” 

“Please please please please please,” I whisper as I near my high more and more. As my orgasm envelops me, I go silent reaching for the peak of my high. The intensity of my squeezing around his dick amplifies, and the added friction is enough for him to climax simultaneously. He doesn’t let up his pace, allowing the both of us to release at the same time. 

“I’m cumming I’m cumming I’m cumming,” I whine as he twitches, jerking slightly as he finishes inside of me. The both of us finish with a symphony of moans and whines, falling into one another’s pleasure as we do.

Trevor then pulls out of me and collapses on the bed beside me. As I turn over, I feel his cum start to leak out of me but I’m too exhausted to do anything about it. When I finally muster the energy and look up at his sweating face, I smile and laugh breathlessly due to the rush of endorphins.

“Holy shit,” I say as best as I can with my dry mouth.

“That was easily the best sex we’ve ever had.”

“Agreed.” We fall silent again for a brief moment, Trevor resting his eyes in the interim. I look at his handsome face and smile as I think about how he’s completely and utterly mine. “I love you, Z.” His eyes flutter back open and he smiles sweetly. He sits up to look at me fully and say,

“I really am the luckiest guy in the world.” Trevor then leans down and places a soft, lingering kiss on my lips. 

“I’ll get you a towel and then you should probably pee.”

“And they say chivalry is dead.”

#Trevor Zegras #Trevor Zegras fanfiction #Trevor Zegras fanfic #Trevor Zegras fic #Trevor Zegras smut #Trevor Zegras fluff #Trevor Zegras angst #Trevor Zegras x reader #Trevor Zegras x y/n #Trevor Zegras imagine #Trevor Zegras one shot #Trevor Zegras oneshot #Trevor Zegras blurb #Trevor Zegras drabble #Trevor Zegras writing #NHL #NHL imagine #NHL fanfiction #NHL x reader #TZ 11 #TZ 46

[weskin-time]

Just read both NSFW daddy Albert headcannons

May I request a part three whenever you think of more?

👉👈

Of course take all the time you need and no rushing yourself

Platonic friendship love to you friendo ❤

HELLO FRIEND!! sorry this took so long!!

Albert Wesker x GN!Reader

not edited or proofread

hope you don’t mind that instead of HCs i did,,,

Albert Wesker NSFW Alphabet

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He tries to be good at aftercare but he’s a busy man and sometimes he’ll just leave you after fucking your brains out to go do more work.

When he’s not busy he loves to kiss you in the afterglow. maybe one last bite to your neck before slowly kissing his way up to your nose.

He does clean himself off before helping you clean if the two of you can’t shower. if you can shower you bet his ass what a picking you up and showering with you.

he would just. plop you into a warm bath and leave you sometimes

he’s good at pillow talk tho

praises you for doing so good for him all while kissing you

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He loves his arms. Loves how strong he is and absolutely adores showing off his strength with you. Picking you up and fucking you against a wall, your legs hooked over his shoulders with your arms around his neck, him holding your complete weight by your ass as he fucks you silly.

He’s got super strength of a God so you’re not falling out of his arms any time soon.

He loves your neck. Honesty he loves all of you but he loves your neck and thighs the most. it’s a power thing for him to love your neck. he could easily crush your windpipe if he squeezes just a bit harder, he could bruise the soft flesh so easily, he could kill you with a flick of his wrist and snap your neck. the thought drives him wild.

Loves choking you. pressing his pointer finger and thumb right under your jaw making your head fuzzy. adores leaving kisses, bite marks, and hickies. if you let him he will bruise your throat with his hand.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He’ll cum anywhere

cumming inside you is his favorite place to cum, so warm inside you as you spasm around him. loves to scoop up any leaking cum and push it back in with his fingers.

also loves to cum on your face. just seeing you stained with him makes him hard again.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he’s an underwear thief.

he keeps them in his back pants pocket or jacket pocket.

yes sometimes he sniffs them.

sometimes if he’s hard he’ll go into the bathroom and cum in them, if you’re not around. tho he washes them and silently returns it to you bc ew crusty

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

well he’s got a kid so he’s sorta experienced

i feel like he’s not a sex god but he’s also not virgin levels of knowledge? you feel me?

he still knows what he’s doing tho.

also a very fast learner

you like him touching you in this one place? he takes a mental note of it and uses it against you

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

mating press.

he also loves doggy when his hand is on the back of your head pushing you down into bed as he fucks into you hard

loves you riding him. seeing your hips struggle after a while of thrusting, loosing your pace as your muscles burn, but still trying to fuck yourself on him trying to cum on his cock. if you stop your shaking legs and just beg him to fuck you, he’ll show you mercy.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he’s serious.

you might not be. i mean do you hear how corny half the stuff that comes out of his mouth is in RE5?? i couldn’t keep a straight face during his fight i was too busy making fun of him.

i feel like the only time he wouldn’t be serious is when there’s a continuous funny sound. like let’s say he’s fucking you and some air happens to get trapped and make a funny fart sound over, and over, and over, and over, he would snort and stop, fix the two of you then continuing to make your brain mush.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

he’s well groomed

i know he’s almost hairless in RE5 idc this is my head canon and i say he’s got a happy trail

artists please give wesker a happy trail i’m bEGGING

he doesn’t care how groomed his partner is as long as it’s not a 70’s porno bush i think then he would tell you to shave

doesnt mind body hair on his partner either

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

little intimacy honestly

most of the time he’s fucking you so hard you get cock drunk

if you ask he will be slower and more sensual

but even some nights he just wants to hold you. the nights when his red eyes are clouded with conflict, those are the nights where he’ll take his time with you

on these nights he wants to focus on you instead of a mutual pleasure.

he takes it slow, but not a snails pace. he wants to make you gasp, to shudder, to let you feel loved.

he’s not very good with people and not good at emotions either but, he tries for you. he wants you to know he loves you even if he isn’t sensual every night

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

he doesn’t get himself off very often

he’s a very busy man

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

i feel like he might be into texture play

leather and latex

he’s a sadist

authority kink (treat him like a god or a superior and he’ll fuck you so hard and good till your a babbling mess)

knife play

blood kink

size kink

i can make an entire list of what kinks i think Wesker has. and no they are not all self indulgent lol >:3

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

LOVES TO FUCK YOU IN HIS OFFICE.

i feel like he wouldn’t want anyone to see you two tho, he locks the doors

slightly public places are fun and fine for him but you belong to him and only he can see and hear you whining for him

loves to fuck you in either your bed or his if you two don’t live together

if you live together then yes his favorite place is yalls bed

shower is also a favorite for him

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

you.

literally just you existing gets him hard and horny.

also noticing how small you are compared to him. makes him feral

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

anything you don’t want to do he will respect and stay away from

i have a feeling he would try anything at least once

not into feet things no, or things that are considered ‘extreme’ fetishes like feeding, anything ‘filthy’, or balloons. those are hard No’s.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

prefers receiving

give him head and he will loose his own head

not afraid to go down on you and will never complain

he just loves to see you on your knees i front of him. seeing your eyes stare up at him through your lashes. you’re trying so hard to make him feel good and please him and it. drives. him. wild.

he’s very skilled with his tongue and mouth. the first time he goes down on you it might be new territory for him, he’ll be a little sloppy at first but he gets learning real fast

sit on his face.

he would prefer you to sit on his face in a 69 than have you lay down on your back

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

he loves to start out at a medium speed but mostly focusing on hitting you as hard as he can. it leaves you whimpering and gasping with how hard and deep he’s going

rough rough rough rough *chanting*

gripping onto your hips to help you meet his relentless fast thrusts, his tentacles wrapping around your throat, nails digging into your flesh

fast and rough but at a perfect pace that leaves you breathless and gasping with tears running down your face from how good he pounding into you

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he’s not a massive fan of them but sometimes they’re needed

like in his office if he’s horny and you’re there? fuck yea he’s gonna bend you over his desk and take you right there

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he’s cool to try anything once (within reason)

he can be risky

mostly risky in choking you till you’re about to black out. your vision going fuzzy and black spots appear. if you don’t like that then give him a little tap tap and the pressure is released.

Loves to put a vibe toy in you and control it when you’re out in public. you better learn how to suppress your sounds in public because whoooooo boy.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

,,, i’m scared of his stamina

in his boss fight he just falls to the ground and then gets back up in a matter of seconds

if he can recover that fast in a fight imagine how fast he can recover during sex

the hentai trope of fucking all night and into the day? yea he can make that a reality.

if you only wanna have one round? he’s cool with that, he’s not tired but he’ll still go to sleep with you (if he’s not busy)

if you want to fuck him as many times as your body can handle? the man loves a good experiment. he’ll fuck you till your about to pass out if you want.

will keep a chart of how long y’all fucked with how many times he’s made you cum and he tries to top it

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

yes.

to make you squirm yes.

use them on him too. yes.

gags? yes. blindfolds? yes. ropes? yes. he uses them on you.

get him a vibrating cock ring and he will go. f. e r a. l.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

WORLDS BIGGEST TEASE

He knows you love his voice. he uses it against you. like a little shit.

whispers dirty things in your ears throughout the day, telling you how badly he wants to fuck you, how hard he is, how badly he needs you.

loves to pin you against surfaces and kiss your neck, leave marks, and just leave you a panting mess then right when his hands are about to go up your shirt,,, he turns around and leaves you

but if you tease him? oh my gods. he will put you in your place.

tease him more often because it results in you being so sore that you won’t be able to walk for an hour or two after.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

HES VOCAL.

he’s constantly running his mouth with vile words in your ears

but when he finally does shut up he’s moaning and he wHIMPERS

he’s loud and proud and not afraid to make sounds, grunts, growls and purrs

during sensual sex he purrs <3

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Loves to have you wear his sunglasses on your head when he’s fucking you

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

he’s bigger than average, about 7 inches and he’s girthy af.

not so much that he can’t enter you, not enough where he’s going to break you, or have it hurt so bad but jjuuuusssstt enough for that good good hurt stretch

his cock makes you feel full

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

he got a normal sex drive i would say

tho sometimes there’s a spike where he’s just a massive horny asshole who needs to fuck you till you both are insane with pleasure

but he’s not constantly jumping in your pants

probably a bit higher than normal really

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

if he doesn’t have to leave to do work right after or it’s not a quicky he makes sure you fall asleep first.

he wants to make sure you’re at peace snuggled into him before he closes his eyes

he slightly snores :)

#tezi post #albert wesker #resident evil #albert wesker x reader #ask! #wesker x reader #wesker #resident evil x reader #resident evil imagine #albert wesker imagine #the mastermind x reader #the mastermind #the mastermind dbd #dbd mastermind #dbd x reader #dead by daylight x reader #dbd albert wesker #albert wesker headcanons #albert wesker x you #albert wesker resident evil #albert wesker dbd #re wesker #x reader

[gatzilksis-2]

10 Days Away (2)

(this story includes fart kink and other adult elements)

Part One: 10 Hours Away

chapter one here

Chapter Two: Gas & Gas

It had been just over 30 minutes from the rest area when a fresh fart silently surfaced.

I turned my head to see Jimmy smirking, making no effort to crack his window. In the front, Anna cracked her own. "Pew! No warning?"

"It's funnier that way." Jimmy's eyes sparkled with mischief behind his glasses, and his thick fingers stroked his goatee.

"I'm sitting up here clenching my cheeks for dear life, and you just let go." Kyle turned the wheel and shook his head. "Anna, dear, you might have to just deal with it. We don't have the time to stop every time someone has to fart."

Anna groaned in disgust. "Maybe we should've flown."

"It'd be just as bad." Kyle developed a pleased smile. "The elevation turns my ass into a noisy biohazard."

"More than usual?" I asked jokingly.

"Oh, yeah." Kyle took a deep breath, puffing his cheeks out. He leaned forward and picked up speed, weaving through cars in front of us. "I can't hold this much longer. It'll go up to my brain, and then I'll be a shithead."

Jimmy and I laughed as Kyle took the nearest exit. He entered the lot of a Shell gas station and parked at a pump. "Anna, you pump. I'm getting a drink inside."

All of us got out of the SUV, me standing behind Kyle. I shut my door, and his fat ass in shorts was right there. PWRRRRP! BRWAAAAARRRT!

I recoiled at the instant smell, mixing with gasoline fumes to turn my stomach. Kyle turned his happy, bearded face to me and patted my back. "That's a yummy new mix, huh?"

"Ew." I grimaced, his fart in my mouth.

Anna came around to pump the gas. Her eyes went wide, and a hand covered her mouth and nose. "Kyle! I have to stand there!"

"I said I couldn't wait!" Kyle left a peck on Anna's lips and walked off to the building. Jimmy and I followed with enough safe distance between, just in case Kyle dropped another one.

The gas station was one of the big ones with numerous fountain pop and coffee options and hot food. I grabbed a coffee cup and started fixing a vanilla cappuccino. Jimmy's large shoulder bumped me as he filled an even larger cup with regular hot coffee. He filled it an inch from the top and proceeded to top it off with creamer.

Jimmy was lactose intolerant, and coffee always sped his digestion.

"Tell me you're not giving yourself gas on purpose again," I said.

"I'm just keeping up with Kyle." Jimmy stirred sugar into his drink and pushed a lid onto the cup. He smiled at me and winked. FLRRR-RRP!

It was louder than we'd both anticipated, and the skinny guy at the register looked in our direction. He was ringing up Kyle, who had the biggest fountain pop and a couple packs of snack cakes.

Jimmy and I walked up behind him, staying two feet from his back. Even so, I could smell that Kyle had farted. The burger had made his gas worse, and the employee had to have smelled it.

I paid for mine and Jimmy's coffees while Kyle waited for us at the door. We joined him, only to step into another strong fart. I gagged, and Jimmy pushed open the door to let in clean air.

Kyle chuckled as he emerged behind us. I got back to my door, realizing Kyle's first fart hadn't faded. "Ew, still smells like fart over here."

"Good hangtime." Kyle gleefully opened his door and got into the SUV, his weight making it sink a couple inches.

I got in to Anna asking, "Did you use the bathroom and get it all out?"

"Again, not how that works, darling." Kyle started the engine and pulled out of the lot. "We're gonna have to fart in the car, and you'll have to deal with it. Maybe we'll get some Febreze if we see a Walmart or dollar store."

"Fine," Anna relented, arms crossed, "but you better not touch that window lock."

"I would never." Kyle told the biggest lie. He'd locked Jimmy and I in with his farts dozens of times. That didn't include the times he'd done it without me.

We got back onto the highway, and the vehicle filled with old country music from the radio. Jimmy was sipping his coffee much faster than I.

We weren't ten minutes from the gas station when Jimmy pointed his ass at me. He grimaced and closed one eye as he unleashed a silent fart. Jimmy held a finger to his lips, and I didn't say anything. He waited for his parents to smell it, grinning and clutching his coffee.

Anna sighed over-dramatically and pushed her window button. The loud, warm highway air roared inside, trying to force out the fart. But it was a thick one, and I knew various flatulent smells would be present for the rest of the ride.

#eproctophilia #farts #gatzilksis #eprocto #fart kink #flatulence #fart fiction #fart stories #male fart fiction #male fart stories

[southshoretides]

Type of Guy Who Fears The Void

On the object level, I think this DeBoer piece correctly identifies a certain type of person (aging white man who self-consciously and showily hates all aging-white-guy pop culture in favor of trying to stay hip), but as the commenters implicitly/explicitly point out, that type of guy is concentrated among the east-coast-grad-educated-tastemaker-social-media-part-time-writer set, i.e. Freddie's milieu, which he often tricks himself into believing is the only milieu in the world. Go to any bar in the Midwest and poll the natives on BTS-vs-Pearl Jam and you'll get different results. (Freddie is of course interminably contrarian relative to whatever his local milieu is, and if fate had brought him to Kansas instead of Brooklyn, he'd be the most red-tribe-hating, pining-for-Brooklyn's-loving-embrace guy on the internet.)

But the meta level of "People recognize that the world naturally puts them in stereotypical boxes and either fight to escape that or wholeheartedly embrace it" is something I think about a lot. That first paragraph was all about different Types of Guy, and that's all it is these days, isn't it? Type of guy, type of guy, type of guy. A whole generation of internet-raised autists can pinpoint your political beliefs based on how you dress or what kind of car you drive. "Guy who makes youtube videos while driving his SUV and wearing wraparound sunglasses" is a different type of guy than "Guy who insists that Carly Rae Jepsen is the best songwriter of the 2010s" but they are politically and culturally opposite Types of Guy, even though there's no rule that says Democrats can't drive SUVs or Republicans can't like Carly Rae Jepsen. But the trend-lines are strong enough that people notice anyway.

@max1461 occasionally gripes about how quickly and thoughtlessly people transpose is-statements with ought-statements, or in other words, take objective factual data about something and try to force it into a prefab narrative. And it certainly is annoying, but to an extent it's like making fun of cavemen for thinking every rustle of grass is a tiger. That's what their environment is giving them, and it's what their brains adapt for. What our environment is giving us is an endless parade of people who eagerly and effusively promote their political and cultural opinions, and eagerly and effusively identify those opinions with such and such group, so no wonder it's so easy for even an amateur to unearth a Type of Guy. No wonder you can look at someone with a Roman-statue avatar and predict with reasonable accuracy his thoughts on young women who dye their hair. And I think this is something the internet makes worse, not better.

I think any objective accounting of the situation would have to conclude that it's easier to be an eccentric in 2023 than in 1993. The internet has allowed weird people to find each other, talk to each other, understand each other and themselves in a way that simply didn't exist before. At the very least, you don't get that "Am I the only human on earth who's like this?" feeling. And the cheap, Hallmark version of diversity/eccentricity is still a popular cultural value: those wall-hangings and birthday cards your aunt buys say "Be Yourself: Everyone Else is Taken", not "Yourself sucks, Be Someone Else." No one wants to be seen as the stodgy, bitter old fart. Part of it, I'm sure, is a cultural thing--Americans seem to obsess over individuality and being one's truest self more than others.

And yet...there's also this ambient sense that eccentricity-in-itself has been devalued in 2023 relative to 1993, at least in my circles. Everything from eccentric tastes in art ("What are you, some kind of hipster filmbro?"), sex ("Of course I'm sex-positive but weird creepy shit doesn't count!") or politics ("You don't really think that, you're just being edgy.") People who value weirdness and eccentricity for its own sake feel hemmed in by people who either openly see it as a threat to their own culture's local hegemony. A lot of the internet really does seem to live by the 'nail that sticks out gets hammered down' and sees that as a good thing. Seems paradoxical.

(For the record, I'm not laying the blame here at any particular subculture. Conservatives blather on about freedom and liberty and then say anyone who refuses to lick an HOA's balls is a dangerous subversive. Progressives say everyone is valid and beautiful and then plaster their spaces with various 'freaks DNI' equivalents, 'freak' status being determined by vibe-centric whisper campaigns. Liberals will Celebrate Diversity up to and no further than the point where it damages quarterly profits. No "name" group is immune to this, really, but certain subgroups are.)

A theory: the normie-weirdo ratio isn't particularly different than it used to be, but the way they interact is different. In the pre-internet days, the weirdos were well aware they were weird, and in having to navigate normie-land with psychological armor on, at least they might come to understand it somewhat. Now, for those who want it, there's an unending stream of validation and insistence that you're perfect the way you are. Without shading into the "can suffering be a good thing if it leads to change for the better?" argument, I think even people who are all-in on the answer being "no" have met at least one person defined by their self-actualization curdling into selfishness and narcissism, to the point where you can't understand how they function, in a way that is directly attributable to a having a stable of pseudonymous online enablers. That's a real phenomenon the way that "Shut up and repress, you freak" is a real phenomenon. They can both suck. They can even both suck in ways that make the other one worse.

The post-mainstream, pre-social-media 'Golden Age' of the internet was when it was basically a playground for weird people. Now everyone's on it by necessity, the weirdo-in-a-small-town dynamics are back, but now the whole world is the small town with the added "no one can ever really escape for good" dynamics of the internet tracking and recording and monetizing every aspect of human interaction.

The weirdos who are old enough to remember when the internet was their turf close ranks and start watching each other for the first signs of Turning Normie--itself something that's antithetical to actually following one's own star and drawing from whatever cultural tradition you find satisfying. The weirdos who aren't old enough grin and bear it because "you're constantly being judged by everyone" is just normal life for them. The stuff that's so popular that liking it puts you in the biggest box possible will benefit; stuff that was never gonna be popular under any circumstances will keep trucking. It's the cultural middle class, as usual, that suffers the most. Again, as I keep emphasizing, this cultural panopticon being both unending and global is unprecedented in human history.

I really think a lot of current cultural neuroses are due to this, although I can't really prove it and don't have the resources to research it. This sense of modern technology revealing to people how fundamentally uninteresting they are and rebelling against it explains a lot to me--the tendency of people to ideologically self-sort to narrower and narrower levels, the uncanny ability of observers to categorize even the relatively-novel versions of those self-sorts, the tendency of some people to just give up and openly embrace everything the hivemind says about them, "be yourself" as a zombified and omnipresent cultural meme when millions of people are struggling existentially with exactly that, every culture absorbing ambient victim-mentality and thinking they're the only right-living people in a world gone mad, the 'cultural class' getting deeper and deeper into objectively-adolescent pop-cultural obsessions and lashing out at the idea they should try something more challenging, the aging-out-of-relevance hipsters Freddie discusses being mortified by the idea of being perceived as exactly that.

The problem, for me at least, is that I understand there is a way out, and if anything it feels worse. I may be a bit younger than the type-case Freddie describes, and am not in an industry where I have to constantly prove my relevance to myself and others, but I am doing the opposite of aging gracefully. Instead of constantly trying to convince my social circle (I don't have a social circle) that having the political, cultural, and artistic preferences of a 21-year-old means I still am one at heart, I engage in the much-healthier practice of spending every waking moment fantasizing being 21 or 18 or, shit, even 14 again. I know nobody really likes getting older. I also think that if everyone was as obsessive and self-loathing about it as I am, society would cease to function. My regrets and pining are definitely unhealthy, obsessive and all-consuming, but I don't really talk about them because there's no way it ends other than "Yeah, that sucks."

But a lot of the people in Freddie's comment section are saying things like "Once I realized I was fundamentally unimportant and my opinions didn't really matter, I could get down to raising my kids/doing my job, which matters more than my feelings." And maybe ten years from now I'll be OK with that. Hell, maybe I'll actually have kids, unlikely as that sounds now. Right now that mindset sounds like a self-administered lobotomy. Maybe I'd be OK with it if I'd actually lived it up in my teens and twenties, tried to become an actual person and discovered what I like about myself, instead of just vaguely Following Rules and assuming there was a payoff to that. Maybe I'd accept that there comes a point in life where my destiny is to be a good parent/worker and that necessarily implies shaving off the hard bits of your personality. Or maybe even the people who were good at being young struggle with getting old. Maybe our cultural/technological moment is just making that a struggle for everyone. Guess I'll never know.

But as we creep closer to no one's parents, then no one's grandparents, remembering a world without the eternal and all-consuming Now of the internet, I suspect I won't be the only one aging with a complete lack of grace, and I suspect we as a culture are completely unprepared to deal with it.

#discourse #aging #culture #the internet

[kpopscruggles]

i just saw the first anton pic LIKE OOOH FUCK ME anyways so i thought of this trope - 🏳️‍🌈 (sungchan dont get angry pls baby) ALSO DIDNT PROOFREAD THIS IS ALL BRAIN FART AND IMPORPER RNGLISH SORRY IDK WHAT TO DO W PRONOUNS

i was listening to underwater by red velvet and lucid dream by aespa while listening so i recommend listening to that while reading

"its senior year y/n, and you're still watching his swim meet? you really lost it huh. that man is obvi straight/he obvi not into you."

"listen-"

"NO. you gotta stop being dumb, i heard his dating this wonyoung girl anyways. like, i get that he's like one of the ten men in the whole university not making you feel like shit for liking them but its been a year? all he did was look st you every time he wins" Your friend leaves dissapointed at you in the school gym watching another swim meet where your crush, anton is playing, but this time will be your last, you hope.

You spaced out during the whole competition, even after anton inevitably wins first place again. You even try to pass anton looking at you then losing his smile as him knowing how you feel but you subconsciously know it was just your delusion.

Everyone left, the gym lights are closed, and the only thing illuminating is the pool itself. You walk towards the edge and put your feet in it. "Is there going to be a man whos gonna love me? I swear i'm getting tired of me being single, why would i even be dumb enough to think that anton would even look at me like that i swear i gotta be d-"

"FUCK. BITCH?!/&:" You fell in the pool but you realized that it was the DEEPEST part of the pool and your ass cant swim

"I HATE THIS SM WHY IS IT SO SLIPPERY ANTON COULD LITERALLY STAND HERE WHY IS IT ACTUALLY SO DEEP" You say trying to save yourself from drowning but great at least youre not leaving college single, you'll end it with a black and white picture and a whole section of you in the yearbook.

You felt an angel holding you and raising yourself out of your misery. you didnt knew you were going to heaven with how much shit you did but- oh wait you're alive.

As you open your eyes you realized the guy that saved you was ANTON LEE ?/&,&,&,&?@?&??

and two things might happen:

one. anton is actually a hot buff merman (stfu 😘)

"h-hi" yn said to anton shyly "hi cutie what are you doing here, yk drowning in the pool hehe" anton laughed pulling himself closer to you. the two of you stared at each other with just a few inches away from each other. anton is strong enough to keep you and him standing afloat as he goes nearer to your face and caressing your cheeks. "You don't know how much i wanted to do this to you" Yn said getting their body closer. "Oh trust me, I saw how you looked at me everytime we see each other" Anton pulled you nearer to him and the both of you started touching each other. You held his body and felt his toned arms, abs, and TAIL??

"WOAH! Yeah this is a wet dream, yeah waking up now" Yn said out loud "Huh?" Anton said laughing "No Like, I love every moment of this like literally I had a similar dream where you're this hot merman and im this cute pretty merman hunter and you fucked me an-"

"OUC-Ohh" You didn't realize that Anton went behind you and pulled you towards him as he went to the end of the pool and started to suck your neck. "You still sure its just a dream?" Anton asked before sucking your neck more and leaving love bites on your neck "An-Anton- Ygh- Stop pls calm down"

"No, I've been wanting to be with you, love you, hold you, carress you, taste you for three years and you just say its a dream? I'm as real as i could be" Anton said sternly removing your clothes and throwing it off the pool. He hugged you from behind pulling you to his body as he placed his dick in your hole. "Anto- Babe" You kissed Anton while he keeps thrusting you in the edge of the pool. You can't handle the pace and you came before him.

"Pretty Baby already made a mess huh" He kisses your head "Don't worry i'm close too" You moaned when he played with you while thrusting deep inside you. you were overstimulated you dont remember much after that other than the pleasure that he was giving you and the kisses he keep laying on your face. The both of you cum in the same time.

"Woah, we need to do this with my human form" That statememnt waked you up from your high "YOUR WHAT" Anton just laughed before He carried you on the edge of the pool and pulled himself right after. And you swore you could make out him right then and there. So you did.


The two of you made out for god knows how long before he broke the kiss. "Babe. I'm strong but you holding my abs like that really hurt" Anton smirks before kissing you again "Wanna move this to the showers?" But you were busy being insecure with what he said before "Babe, I didnt say I dont like you holding me like that, I wished for you to hold me like that" He said and you smirked while laying on his chest "Can we stay like this for a minute?" You asked. He played with your hair "Ok" He answered and the both of you held each other's prescence for the next hour.

two. hes just a little shy baby

Anton just looked at you not muttering a word as he saved you from drowning

"Th-Thank You" You said shyly as you try to stand up to go to your seat while anton is just seated on the edge of the pool. "I have extra clothes if you do-" "No its okay" Yn quickly shutted the idea out.

"No its fine i insist" "Its okay, really wouldn't your girlfriend be weird-" Anton got visibly shocked when he heard that from yn. "Girlfriend?? First of all i dont have a girlfriend, second of all why are you interested in my love life" "Uh- Uhm well you're really cute and I-i think youre fine uhm sorry i'll just leave you alone now" you were scared (and kinda turned on) with how anton looked at you but you werent sure if it was because of how scary anton is or because of how embarrassed you were or if it was the cold but you started tearing up which was not anton's intention, he quickly went to you and started comforting you

"I'm sorry u-uh did i scare you I didn't mean it" Anton began rambling trying to calm you down "Its just that i was just surprised that people think me and my bestfriend who is obviously into women and has a girlfriend are dating and especially because you think were dating when i only had eyes for you, i like you okay, i like your glances at me, i like how you smile back when you look at me thats why i was surprised you didnt even look at me when i won, i like your little rambles when we see each other, i like the photos you send to me and the little storytimes you say to keep our conversation going, i like the way you look, i like your flustered fsce right now, Ugh" He went silent with the water from his body dripping as the only noise in the whole gym before screaming (but its anton his scream is probably like 4 decibles) "I liked you okay" He rolled his eyes before saying "And its really annoying that he keeps being oblivious on my feelings for him for three years just called me cute then saying he'll leave me alone because he thinks im dating this random ass girl"

Yn just laughed after the revelation. "PFft. Well here I am thinking im the one whos gonna ramble on how much I crushed on you since last year and how my friend keeps saying you and wonyoung were dating making me think i have no chance with you" Yn smiled before hugging Anton "I love you" yn said burying your head on his chest "Gimme a kiss" Anton said "No" You said looking at him. He pouted "Gimme a kiss" He said more whiny than the last time. You pecked his right cheek "Thats not what I mean" Anton rolled his eyes before looking straight at you "Say pleaseeee" You said teasingly. "UGH. Please Gimme a kiss" He received a peck on his lips and he was opening his mouth to yap about some nonsense when you shutted him up with a deep kiss he groaned before kissing you back.

You weren't shy to put your tongue in and as he moaned he put his tongue in too and the both of you started making out. Anton broke the kiss "I love you, I wanna be yours" He said albeit really randomly. "Don't worry i'm all yours"

The both of you went to shower and because theres no smut yet here it is

"You sure you wanna shower together? The cubicle is really small" Anton said "And you think i dont wanna be all up close to your body" he rolled his eyes trying to hide his blush.

"You can't keep your hands off me? I just opened the door" He said laughing at your horniness you just rolled your eyes then entered in the cubicle. Anton is really shy, REALLY shy, and it honestly turned you on. He faced away from you while he was busy showering so you wont see how red he is looking at you but that just turned you on more.

You held his face making him face you and kissed him. He was obviously stunned and his cute face made you squish his cheeks. "Let me show you what I'm all yours means babe" You kiss anton's lips, then kiss his adam's apple, marked his chest leaving hickeys on it, tracing his abs with your tongue and finally planting a kiss on his dick

Looking up was a sight to see, a flustered anton looking at you so lovingly but also so sexually. "Yn. I'm a virgin" He said pouting. "Don't worry I'm a virgin too" You said before trying to fit his dick in your mouth. You had a hard time pushing all in so you opted to teasing him by licking his shaft and kissing his tip and jerking him off but you gathered enough courage to suck it all in.

Anton was livid with what you're doing with him. He could hardly keep himself standing with him playing with your hair as a way to keep himself in reality. Moaning at every action you did to him. So when you finally put his dick in your mouth he felt estatic he moaned really hard before cumming

"Oh Fuck. Sorry, Shit. I told you its my first time and you did all that to me I thought you were a vo- Oh woah Ughh Yn what are you- UGH" To his surprise you didnt stop sucking even though you just had a load of cum that he kept for 2 weeks in your face.

"Yn. Ugh Yn. Ynnnn. UGH. I love you I love you" He kept on repeating these words while you were busy sucking him off again. He felt really good, He leaned on the wall and put his thighs on each side of your face and forced you to keep sucking while pushing his dick deeper in your head. It wasn't long before he came again.

"Yn, Oh fuck I'm sorry" He said but you just stood up giggled before swallowing every seed he released in your mouth. "I love you" He hugged you slowly and kissed your head over and over.

He saw how tired he looked and he cleaned you up and made you wear his clothes.

"You look good wearing my clothes" Anton said giggly. "I'll look even better if you take it off-" He kissed you "Yeah next time when your voice is not super hoarse cause of my dick" He kissed you again and it took all his might to not make it another makeout session

JBDBDNENSNDND OKAY BUT HEAR ME OUT!!! What if you think he’s a little shy boy but deep down he’s fooling you and he is a siren that’s like living on earth because he hates the ocean and wants too see the world (lil sprinkle of Ariel scenario) !!! (So scenario b for a moment)

After your guys little moment he starts watching you from Afar but slowly luring you into him and becomes addicted to your taste and smell. Almost to the point where when you get close he just has to put his lips on yours…nibbling slightly in your bottom lip

#🏳️‍🌈 anon #Anton smut #Anton hard hours #Anton hard thoughts #riize smut #riize hard hours #riize hard thoughts

[msjarvis]

9 people you’d like to get to know better

thanks for the tag to the amazing and so, so talented @notjustjavierpena ✨💖✨

last song: Thunder Road by Bruce Springsteen

color: purple.. in all its nuances, variations, undertones

currently watching: actually nothing. An unfortunate combination of lack of time, lack of motivation and battle with not the best headspace. I have so many titles between movies, series and animes in my "to watch" list that it's kind of embarrassing… 🤦‍♀️ Last things I actively watched (months ago now) was Ted Lasso. Kinda binged it in two days and LOOOVED it!

last movie: I rewatched Up From The Poppy Hill by Gorō Miyazaki (Studio Ghibli movies are my go to when my anxiety kicks really hard)

currently reading: the wonderful works of the stellar authors here on Tumblr. I'm kinda new in the Pedro Pascal / The Last of Us fandom and I am constantly amazed by the absolute talent of the writers. You guys are really all rockstars. In particular I'm slowly reading and rereading the works by: @notjustjavierpena : last amazing author I had the luck to find. Her Husband!Javi series is extraordinary, emotional, superb.. 🥹 @wheresarizona : first author I've found in the fandom. I know, I started with a bang..😃 All her works are absolutely stellar. Her Learning To Live series is breathtaking.. 😍 @kteague : the one who introduced me in the incredible world of Francisco Morales. The day I've found her Because of You series I've thanked the algorithm Deity! 😆 That series is truly one of my happy place.. 🤩 She also has series about Javi and Joel (this last one I still have to read it but I'm sure that it will blow my mind.. 😊) @macfrog : the Queen of cliffhangers and (sometimes) angst. She has a unique way to write about Joel... just unbelievably exceptional! 😌 @undercoverpena : if you are looking for a master author that will make you tear up, cure your soul, put a constant smile on your face and blow your mind with a Javi and/or Francisco story.. well you have found it... 🥹 @softlyspector : her writing is distinctive, special, unmatched... Her Honeyed series is a precious, rare gem.. 🥰 @bageldaddy : she's is the kind of author who manages to transport you to other places and other times with her writing. Her I Know It When I See It series is just astounding. It's more than a fanfic. It's a screenplay of a wonderful movie where while you read you can hear sounds, music, voices, noises, reactions. Just.. wow…🤯 @hier--soir : all her works are exceptional.. and her A Lover's Pinch series?!? Stuff to scream into the pillow for its greatness… 🫨 (and she has a detail of the painting "Narcissuss" by Caravaggio as a header in her blog! How 'effin cool is that!!) @darkroastjoel : stumbled upon her talent for her Javi fics. Her Javier has distinctive and specific "voice" that is just incredible. 🤩 Then I've found out that she also write for Joel.. and she has one series that I still have to read but, just from the summary, I am sure it will rip my heart in two. In a superior way, of course. 😬 @fuckyeahdindjarin : a valuable voice in the fandom who has my gratitude to introduce me in the weirdest world of Dieter Bravo and the magical one of Jack Daniels.. 😍 (still have to read her last installment of her Palomino series. It's just.. I'm not ready.. I'm not strong enough..🥺)

sweet/spicy/savory: erm... I can I say all three?!?!?😂

relationship status: single af

current obsession: is it really an obsession if makes you happy and helps you in the hardest of time?!? 🤔

last thing i googled: synonyms of the word amazing.. 😅 oh the joy to be bilingual (or at lest trying to) and having a brain that farts most of the time.. 😂

currently working on: being present... and happy.

tagging: well.. the ones up there. no pressure at all, of course.

Side note: Just realized that I most likely got the purpose of this tag game wrong. Or, at least, I probably didn't interpret it to the best.😶

I should do a proper fic/author rec list... I need to do a proper fic/author rec list....... I'll do a proper fic/author rec list. 😬

Ok... byyeeeeeeee!!! ✨💖✨

#tag game #or appreciation/rec post #I think I've messed up.. sorry.. 😬 #I've actually just tagged the first 10 people that came on top of my head #there are so many authors and so many talented people #if you don't see your name up here is not because I don't appreciate you #it's because I've tried to restrain myself to not go full blown and do a mile long post #or because I've not yet found you #I really have to fucking work on a appreciation/rec post #again... ok.. byyeee.. ✨💖✨

[lesbx]

my objective rankings of (most of) the fallout 4 companions based on my opinions of them, mostly on how much i like them and how well written I think they are (or aren’t. in a lot of cases.) going from best to worst.

1: preston garvey. easily the best written companion, one of the like top ten best characters in the franchise, if not the best presented though. if he had not been designated as the lackey for the most generic and repetitive radiant quests in the game, he would probably have gotten to shine more as just a very good character

2: ADA. i just really like ADA i’m sorry she’s barely a character but i’m hugely biased bc i just like her

3: piper wright. Although not a companion I often travel with after getting to others, she’s still a really cool character. I like how she has unique dialogue animations and facial expressions to make her stand out as a very exuberant and loud person. her story is also pretty good, if pretty general. she mostly ranks so high bc it’s difficult to find faults with her

4: nick valentine. One of my favorite companions in the franchise, he just has such a rich personality and striking visual design, paired with a really strong narrative, good all around. Ranks below piper bc you can’t put him in any other outfits. peel that thang off of him

HANCOCK i forgot him. he goes here. i like him

5: codsworth. what codsworth lacks in plot, he makes up for in personality. i think him being connected to you from before the war makes for some interesting potential dynamics based on your chosen roleplay

6: curie: curie is really cute and good, i love her story and her comments on things. Only bad things about her are the weird tropes she falls into as a woman you essentially “make” and then can romance if you choose to. nothing too egregious, but weird writing

7: old longfellow. i think i just like this old fart.

8: danse. boring but nothing i dislike about him. his quest is good and an interesting twist

9: maccready. i like him, but his story is boring. i think the thing where they wrote him to be like really conscious about swearing based on his fallout 3 iteration is really really funny though

10: strong. i also like strong but he’s easily the weakest out of the companions story wise, effectively having nothing in the way of it. even his reasoning for following you is nothing you can act on bc his goal doesn’t actually exist and has no resolution. i usually like to make a settlement just for him and let him live quietly and peacefully.

11: cait. the only companion whose writing actively irritates and annoys me to the point of ALMOST disliking the character herself, although i do still try to like her despite it. one of the worst character plot lines bethesda has come up in the entirety of their work across all the franchises. just a miserable excuse for a character and story when it could’ve been so much better so easily, if they had had even one person with a brain in their skull in the building when they wrote cait, maybe she would’ve turned out better but here we are

companions who have been OMITTED from the rankings are dogmeat, porter gage, deacon, and x6-88. dogmeat bc he is immune to criticism by virtue of being a dog, and the others bc i simply have never interacted with them enough as companions to form an opinion. especially gage and x6, as i have still never like actually fully played nuka world, nor have i played an institute aligned character. if i had to just throw together a ranking for them though based on what i do know of them, it would probably be x6 > deacon > gage

[friedbaekhyunandeggso]

Reason ~ ch.7

Pairing: Female OC x Levi Ackerman

Tropes: Instructor x Cadet, Strangers to Lovers, Male MC falls first

Warnings: angst/slow-burn, strong language, upcoming smut(18+ readers only for those chapters pls 🙈), physical assault/violence, mentions of scars

Brief Summary: This story takes place a few years after the Fall of Shiganshina. Devon Alba is in her final year of the 101st Training Corps (844-847), due to her success as a cadet she gets the chance to meet Captain Levi. She doesn’t think too much of him until he catches her in the midst of doing something that she isn’t entirely supposed to be doing. But surprisingly, this leads to something unexpected...

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11

Keith, Monty and Devon stood outside the girls bathroom. They’d all just finished their classroom studies for the day.

Monty was excitedly going on about the health benefits of several herbs he’d learned about in one of his survival skill classes.

Keith leaned against the wall, “Monty, can we please talk about something interesting? You're hurting my brain.”

Monty shut the book in his hands, “Sorry, just thought you’d want to know that rosemary leaves are good for wrinkles.”

Keith suddenly straightened, “Are you tryna say I have wrinkles?”

Monty grinned while Devon jabbed him with her elbow.

“No-he is not.” she interjected.

She wasn’t in the mood to hear Keith go on a tangent about his looks. Keith was very sensitive about the upkeep for his ‘beautiful’ face.

“If I have wrinkles just tell me.” he demanded.

“He’s just messing with you, beauty queen.” she rolled her eyes.

He glared before slumping against the wall again, “Not funny.”

He then grumbled, “My mom still wants to see you guys come by to get free facials.”

Keith’s mother was a beautician—which was a relatively new career path but it was slowly gaining more traction. It was also the main reason why Keith cared so much about his face.

“Psh—as if.” Monty declined.

“Your loss.” Keith looked over at Devon, “What about you? My mom wants to meet you.”

“Me?”

He glanced away quickly, “And Imada.”

“She’s already met Imada.” she stated.

He suddenly appeared flustered, “Yeah well…you're the only one in the friend group she hasn’t met yet so she’s curious.”

He then faced Monty, “You’d probably be interested to know that Imada is coming to get a facial on friday.”

Monty’s face turned beet red, “Oh.”

Keith tilted his head—his tone mocking, “Not too opposed to getting a facial now, are ya?”

Monty glared.

Keith punched Monty’s chest playfully, “When are you going to tell her, big guy?”

Monty shifted nervously, “I really shouldn’t have told you guys.” he mumbled.

Devon smiled a bit, “Even if you didn’t, it wouldn’t be that hard to figure out.”

“What?!” Monty exclaimed in horror, “Am I obvious?”

Keith chuckled, “It’s not a bad thing. It’s kinda cute. You look like a lost puppy around her.”

Monty looked like he’d just been electrocuted.

“Relax. It’s really not that obvious but since we know you—it is.” Devon corrected.

Monty ran a hand over his face, shaking his head.

“It doesn’t even matter. She doesn’t like me.”

“You don’t know that though!” she rebutted.

“I do know it.” he sighed.

“Oh please,” Keith snorted, “Devon, why don’t you talk to Imada and see what she thinks about him?”

“Um..”

“Wait-but you can’t tell her that I like her.” Monty added, looking petrified.

“Guys, I really don’t think I’m the one for this,” she complained. “If she asks me why I’m asking about you-which she will-then I’m gonna have to tell her.”

“But you can’t.” Monty insisted.

“But she knows when I’m lying!”

Before anyone could respond, Imada emerged from the bathroom.

“Hey guys. I just heard someone rip the nastiest fart I’ve ev—“ she paused when she saw all their faces, “What happened to you guys?”

“Nothing.” They all said in unison.

Imada folded her arms, “You guys are horrible liars.”

Keith slipped his arm around Imada’s shoulders, “You know, the regular dumb shit. Just told Monty that you were gonna get a facial at my Moms on Friday and now he wants to come along to fix his wrinkles.”

“Wrinkles?” she giggled. “He’s only nineteen.”

“Apparently stress can give you wrinkles.” Keith informed her.

Imada glanced over at Monty as she lightheartedly asked, “MonMon, are you stressed?”

“What’s there to stress about?” Monty responded.

“I can think of a few things.” Keith said with a devious smirk.

Monty shot him a look, “I’m gonna beat your ass.”

Keith winked at him, “Spank me, Daddy.”

Keith bolted a second before Monty ran after him. The girls laughed in their wake.

Devon glanced around once-more before slipping into the kitchen. She closed the door behind her with a relieved sigh.

“There you are.”

She froze-nearly going into cardiac arrest-until she saw Levi’s slouched frame sitting on the kitchen counter.

She was speechless.

“You going to stand there all day? I’m hungry.”

She swallowed-her mind racing with a million questions.

“You…” she trailed off.

He looked over at her and raised a brow.

“Never mind.” she muttered.

If he wasn’t snitching on her then she wouldn’t complain. The whole situation felt so bizarre. Captain Levi coming back to eat her food? She didn’t even think that was possible.

She walked past him to the food storage freezer. She grabbed a bunch of vegetables before plopping them down onto the counter besides Levi.

She then went to the pantry to retrieve onions and canned beans.

He glanced down at the array of ingredients beside him, “How many more vegetables do you need?”

Despite his monotone voice, his sarcasm wasn’t missed.

She flushed, “That’s all. The recipe for this meal actually has meat in it but I don’t have that so… vegetables will do.”

After that, he let her cook in silence.

Every so often, in between glancing at the recipe and preparing the meal she’d shoot glances at him.

He’d slid off the counter and moved his perch to one of the stools nearby. She’d caught him looking at her a few times. Other times, he kept himself busy by wiping down his personal knife with a handkerchief.

Despite his downcast countenance, she couldn’t help but notice how handsome his side profile was. His nose was quite literally perfect. His roundish face would’ve given him a more youthful appearance had his half-lidded eyes and ever-present subtle scowl not existed.

She shook her head, refocusing on the task at hand-which was to stir everything together. After a moment of doing that, she reread the recipe to make sure she’d completed all the steps before returning all the remaining ingredients to their designated spots.

When she returned from the freezer she saw Levi standing in front of the stove. The lid of the pot in his hand.

He was still peering down at its contents when he said, “It looks like shit.”

She rolled her eyes, “Does it smell like it though?”

She took the lid from his hands and placed it back over the pot.

“Give it five more minutes and it should be done.”

Five minutes later, they were sitting across each other in the same spot as yesterday. They both had steaming bowls in front of them.

She reached out to hand him a spoon.

He took the spoon, “You said this was chili?”

“Yes-Vegetarian chili but yes.”

For some reason, she couldn’t bring herself to eat just yet. She was too eager to see his reaction first.

He scooped out a small portion and raised it to his lips. He took a small sip before taking the whole spoonful.

She saw him close his eyes for a moment-as if savoring it-before nodding in approval.

She smiled wide—wanting to jump up and fist pump the air but she contained herself.

She looked over to see him staring at her with wide eyes.

“What’s wrong? Is it good?”

“Yeah, it’s—“ his brows furrowed for a millisecond before continuing, “It’s good.”

She tilted her head-wanting to decipher his expression, “Were you not expecting it to be?”

“Pft. Cocky already?” he noted dismally.

“What—“ she then registered how her question had been taken. “No. But…I suppose, since you did come back for my food instead of snitching on me I am more confident in my skills.”

“I can still snitch.”

She reached out to take his bowl, “I’ll just take that back-“

He swatted her hand away, “Get your filthy hands away from my soup.”

She gasped before narrowing her eyes, “Oh so it’s your soup now.”

“Last time I checked the only reason you got to cook in that kitchen today is because I let you. So, yes, it’s my soup.”

She stared in astonishment before scoffing, “Whatever.”

“Don’t be a brat.”

She gaped at his brazen words, “I-I’m not!”

“Whatever.” he mocked her tone.

A slight laugh left her lips as she blushed-realizing how childish she had sounded. She glanced up when she felt his gray eyes boring into her face. It would’ve felt like he was glaring at her if that wasn’t his constant expression.

He gripped his spoon tightly, “You didn’t eat yet.”

“Oh-right.” she nearly forgot to try her own chili in her excitement.

She ate a spoonful and hummed in approval. It was hearty and flavorful. Much better than the bland soup they were typically served. Though, she couldn’t fault the chef for not making chili because it would use up more than half of the rare shipment of vegetables to serve all the cadets.

He watched her eat. It was oddly satisfying to see her eat so…fulfillingly. Something about her poise made him see just how grateful she was for each spoonful. He’d seen people eat like that before…homeless people.

Has she ever been homeless?

That pretty blush returned to her face and she lowered her spoon.

“What?” he said, his voice tight.

She avoided his gaze, “I can’t eat when you're… looking at me.”

He was silent for a moment-assessing her reaction.

“What’s there to look at?”

Her eyes widened, “A-are you serious?”

“Very.”

“But you were literally staring.”

“Was not.”

“Were too!”

“Such a brat.”

A slight chuckle left her lips before she raised a brow, “I didn’t realize Captain Levi had a sense of humor.”

“Who said I was joking.” he said, his face completely expressionless.

She ran a hand over her face, “You’re impossible.”

She swore she saw the corner of his mouth twitch but her view became obscured when he turned his head down to resume eating the chili.

She fell asleep that night feeling rather giddy. It was quite an unfamiliar feeling but she let herself revel in it.

Cooking in solitude every night had been her little secret. A moment in time that she enjoyed alone. And somehow her little secret had become a party of two.

And surprisingly enough, she didn’t hate it.

In fact, she kind of wanted it to happen more often. It felt nice to have someone else-someone new-around. Especially someone she knew she could learn so much from. But-just like herself-Levi wasn’t exactly an open book.

A small part of her wanted him to be—at least with her, anyway. But she didn’t dare get her hopes up. He was one of her instructors after all.

#levi #leviheichou #levi aot #levi attack on titan #levi ackerman #levi angst #attack on titan #aot #levi x reader #levi x oc #levi scenarios #aot fanfiction #levi fanfic #levi ship #levi fluff #captain levi #attack on titan smut #levi smut #attack on titan scenarios #levi x fem!reader #eren yaegar #levi x y/n #levi x mc #levi x you #levi hot #aot smut

[charcadett]

Soooo. This is incredibly niche. But I’m back on my Transformers bullshit so why not…. Mash my two hyperfixations together like a caveman trying to start a fire.

Pokemon Scavio Characters Transformers Alt Modes

Nemona - A motorcycle fits her well I think. She’d have a side car for her friends because they mean a lot to her. Only Penny is small enough to fit.

Penny - If we are going only Cybertronian animals. Turbofox because they look the closest to an Eevee. But honestly, I think she should just straight up have an Eevee alt mode.

Arven - Just. An oven. A big, giant oven. Bake a cake in him. I dare you.

Hassel - A dragon. One, I think it’d be funny as hell. Two, Predaking from Prime is hot and so is Hassel. And also: It’d still fit well with his from an ancient dragon trainer family who ran away to do music backstory. Except he’s the dragon.

Brassius - Something small and not built for fighting I think… Maybe a flashdrive?? To store images of his art and art history. I think it’d fit with how he was sickly and sort of weak when he first met Hassel.

Katy - A little volkswagen beetle. I was gonna just do an insect alt mode. Like. A katydid. But I think the pun with a little bug car is infinitely funnier.

Kofu - A boat. That’s really it, bro is a boat.

Grusha - A snowmobile, one of those really fast ones but an accident has rendered his tcog beyond repair and he can no longer transform.

Ryme - A speaker, kind of self explanatory considering her music career.

Iono - A camcorder! She makes guests on her stream hold her whenever anything good is happening. Also won’t stop recording people in real time.

Tulip & Miriam - They’re both jets. It’s said in game by one of the NPCs that Miriam used to be a model before she became the Academy’s nurse and I like to imagine her and Tulip as former coworker/friends. So they’re both jets and former seekers LOL.

Larry - I have no proof that transformers can have office supplies as an alt mode but this man screams stapler.

Rika - A dirt bike! I was gonna go motorcycle because sleek and she would love to do tricks, but a dirt bike would be good for her Ground-typing speciality. She’s always covered in mud.

Poppy - A little armored car! It goes with her Steel-typing speciality.

Geeta - The champion gets to be a triple changer. Jet and car combo. She has to go fast to get to all the places she’s needed at.

Clavell & Jacq - Both are microscopes, Clavell’s is a stronger one though I think.

Salvatore - A sports car, sleek and cool for a sleek and cool guy. He’s not big for joy rides though.

Tyme - An SUV. Very strong, sturdy, and reliable!

Saguaro - A tank! I think it fits well with his students thinking he’s a big tough guy, when he’s really a total sweetheart.

Raifort - A drone perhaps… Maybe I just have Earthspark on the brain but it’s small and it’d make it easy for her to access hard to get to historical spots. Also Raifort seems like someone who eavesdrops LOL.

Turo - Something stupid and machine-y. Like a centrifuge.

Sada - Straight up a dinosaur… Thinking. Pterosaur?? Because Roaring Moon kind of looks like one. I know those aren’t dinos technically but whatevs.

Ortega - A car, but a pink one so he’s REALLY conspicuous. He’s the mechanic who built the star mobiles so I think it works.

Eri - A tank! Big and strong, though she prefers hand to hand combat and training rather than relying on her alt mode.

Mela - A flamethrower. Someone has to hold her, usually Eri.

Giacomo - A soundboard. His favorite sounds are “Bruh” and a fart noise. Another team star member who needs to be held.

Atticus - An arachnid, specifically a black widow. Not only does it help him make Team Star costumes with webbing, but also ties in with his Poison-type focus.

#pokemon scarlet and violet #crossover #i dont wanna tag this too much because incredibly niche and also i just want to stuff this in a canon and blast followers with it #if it doesnr show up atticus is a spider #‘An arachnid specifically a black widow. not only does ot help him make team star costumes with webbing but also fits his poison speciality

[austronauts]

Straight dudebro males in the hockey fanbase are incredibly and weirdly obsessed with mitch’s body and i beg them to STOP before they embarrass themselves further. PLEASE. 

Like, we know that men have been creepily fixated on Mitch’s body way before Mitch was even drafted to the NHL. It is genuinely impossible to look for old Mitch content without stumbling across at least 3 articles and disturbingly robust online discourse about how small and scrawny and “unfit for the NHL” he is but - 

Y’ALL. I! CANNOT! iMAGINE! the ENTITLEMENT of being some 38 yr old man, someone who listens to the Joe Rogan podcast and lives in a gaseous cloud of his own protein shake farts, thinking HE knows MORE about what Mitch’s body should or shouldn’t look like than MITCH HIMSELF (who’s been playing elite-level hockey since he was basically an ultrasound and is litchrally one of the best current players in the NHL) and MITCH’S TEAM OF TRAINERS (for whom maintaining hockey players’ bodies is their LITERAL ASS JOB) 

i am begging them to formulate a better understanding of the sheer range and variety of what athletic bodies can look like, and get it through their calcified gigachad brains that most elite athletes’ bodies are perfectly and painstakingly optimized to best succeed in their specific sport and roles! AND that having bulging biceps and a six-pack are not at all indicative of a person’s athleticism! How do EYE, a sentient potato with a wifi connection, KNOW THIS better than THEM. Like huh? You want Mitch to suddenly become Dwayne the Rock Johnson sized? But you’re still going to expect him to maintain his level of speed and ability to weave intricate plays? It doesn’t work that way, Brockinley.

i also bring this up because sooo much of the straight dudebro men’s obsession with mitch is SO mired in toxic/outdated notions of masculinity and plain old body shaming that have absolutely zero grounding in reality.

Like, “too soft and too weak”? He’s almost always one of the players who logs the most minutes on the ice, and is on both the penalty kill and the powerplay.

He “doesn’t care”? Do you think he would’ve lasted as long with the Toronto Maple Leafs, a franchise that has one of the meanest and rabid fanbases, if he did not care about hockey, his team, or winning.

It’s just so abundantly clear that these eejits’ definition of “strong” or “cares about his team” depend entirely on how many brawny teeth-shattering hits a player is willing to make or take. And I hate this because it’s this kind of idiotic perception that DIRECTLY perpetuates the exploitation of players’ bodies and culture of ignoring/minimizing short-term and long-term injuries in professional sports. 

And sure, Mitch is one of the most prominent young athletes in the NHL right now playing for one of the biggest NHL franchises. And you can’t be a famous professional athlete without making your body - the biggest and only asset you own as an athlete really - available for public scrutiny and discourse. BUT like, these MEN’S obsession with scrutinizing Mitch’s body specifically is just - I’ve rarely seen anything like it lmfao. 

They just hate to see pretty twinks succeed in HOCKeY, a SPORPS that they think is meant for strong brawny MANLY MEN who are all 6′3″ and 220lbs and aren’t afraid to lose all their teeth and retire at the age of 28 from permanent hip labrum damage and CTE. And I feel so sorry for them because :((((( Mitch still isn’t going to fuck you, lads! 

#it is friday and i had TIME to rant #also there's SO much discussion to be had about this intense public scrutiny of males' bodies and gatekeeping of masculinity #and how all of this directly leads to misogyny homophobia transphobia etc. that's already so rampant in professional sports and our society #in gENERAL but i won't go there rn #oh and the terrible underdiagnosing of EDs in men when CLEARLY so many of them suffer from body dysmorphia and EDs #anyway anyway anyway #let ppl just have BODIES lmao thank u #it's NOT THAT HARD

[bluesest]

A Doctor (70 followers Special)

My name is Evan and today I will tell an anecdote that happened in my work, I was 30 years old at that time, I was a doctor in a large and prestigious hospital, I have treated all kinds of patients, from the pleasant ones to the irritating ones, many times I They say I'm a good doctor and I just say thank you.

It was a great summer morning when my secretary let the first patient pass, he was a 35-year-old man, with muscles, a nice hairstyle and brown hair, the patient introduced himself: "Good morning Doctor, my name is Erick Fitsgerald ", I returned the greeting and asked: "What is your discomfort?", He replied: "I have come here because I have had a lot of stomach pain and uncontrollable diarrhea", I immediately laughed and told him that he was just exaggerating, but he with a serious tone told me: "Doctor, believe me when I tell you that liquid poop manages to touch my butt every 20 minutes, and it takes me 30 minutes to get out of the bathroom", those words aroused a strange feeling in me.

Immediately I started with the general medical check-up, that is, a check-up that I do to all people regardless of their discomfort or ailments, first I started with the temperature, normal for a 35-year-old man, then with my stethoscope I listened to his breathing and heartbeat from the heart, nothing remarkable, then I remembered his diarrhea and used my stethoscope to listen to the digestive movement and therefore his stomach, inside it I managed to hear how rivers of water collided with each other, and occasionally, underwater bombs exploding fiercely inside the rivers, I was thinking about the reason for these noises when the patient told me: "Doctor, excuse me for interrupting you, but can I go to the bathroom?", I already suspected what was happening and said "Can you hold on for a few more minutes?" patient refused and said: "No, this stomach is going to expel a lot of liquid right now!", the way he said it caused me the same strange feeling, and of course, I let him go to the bathroom.

The bathroom was relatively close to the office room, that bathroom was an exclusive place for patients, that's why the bathroom was inside a small room inside the medical office, I managed to see how Erick firmly put his right hand on his stomach while He walked to the bathroom in a strange way, Erick closed the bathroom door, I quickly put my ear to the bathroom door and managed to hear the sound of Erick's belt unbuckling, then he dropped his pants abruptly towards the white ceramic of the bathroom, I heard a thunderous fart thrown into the air even standing still, I assumed that since after that fart I heard how the patient sat down with force and speed on the ceramic, and there I heard everything, the sound of the liquid seemed like a clogged water hose releasing all the water that wanted to get out with strength, it was as if the hose were the intestines and the water was liquid diarrhea, a lot of wet and strong farts came out, that As they struck like lightning in the sea, I could only hear my patient's suffering.

Suddenly I couldn't stop feeling that sensation, that sensation came directly to my penis, as if it were magic, my brain sent liters of blood to my penis, I could swear that it was one of the most gigantic and furious erections I've had in my entire life. life, worried (and horny) I asked Erick what was happening behind the door, he replied: "Are you deaf? I'm literally (wet fart) expelling my intestines!", an idea occurred to me and I asked him that when Erick finished , Ahem "his work" did not flush the toilet because I was going to examine his feces for "Medicinal" purposes, he was surprised but he accepted, as he had said it took him 30 minutes to leave, he told me: "Be careful, better put on an anti-radiation mask", I told him not to worry and between closing the bathroom door, the smell was rotten, it reminded me of stagnant water from the drain, I slowly approached the toilet and when I saw its interior I was surprised, all the white porcelain became e In a dark brown paste, the water was completely brown and brown bubbles came out of it together with little pieces of solid shit, I don't remember why I did it but I took off my gloves, then I plunged my right hand into the putrid water, the water burned like hell and slowly smeared the shit on my penis and started massaging it slowly, as I did so an idea occurred to me.

Although I didn't wash my hands, I put my gloves back on and got out of there (without pulling the valve), I saw Erick sweaty and tired, I asked him what was wrong and he said: "I think I'll have to use the bathroom soon" , I told him that a brief solution was to massage his back and hips, he accepted, he took off his shirt and I took off my gloves, I began to massage him, he noticed a thick liquid and asked what that was and I said it was cream for massages, he said: "Doctor, sorry for destroying your bathroom", I comforted him and said: "Don't worry, everyone has diarrhea sometimes, I remember that one whole day I couldn't leave the bathroom and I ended up destroying a lot pants", he laughed and empathized with me, then Erick warned me: "That's what will happen if he doesn't let me go to the bathroom", I told him: "Relax and start shitting here, don't worry, it won't happen nor will I say anything", several bubbly farts came out of him, he excitedly opened the back of his pants and watched the process as the body expended. I used liters of brown water, I grabbed my penis and put it in Erick's pants and started to move slowly, as if I was having anal with him, Erick said: "I'm sorry about the mess I'm causing", and I replied: " Calm down... Everyone shits", after that sentence liters of semen came out of my penis and mixed in the diarrhea in my patient Erick's pants.

#Diarrhea #Farts #Coprophilia #Pants #Toilet #Illness #Doctor

[calciseptinefic]

a luxury few can afford

Marvel || Wade Wilson/Peter Parker || Part 2 notes: this fic is also available on ao3 warnings: kissing i guess

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Part 1

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When Peter gets home, he goes in through his bedroom window. It's on the seventh floor of a seven story walk-up and it faces an old brick wall; there's barely enough room between the two buildings for the fire escape, let alone a view, but Peter likes the privacy. He crawls in, landing on the welcome mat MJ bought him as a tongue-in-cheek house warming gift, and begins to undress. Mask and gloves, body suit and boots are left in a puddle on the floor. His web-shooters go in the top drawer of his bedside table, rattling around with spare cartridges. His phone stays in his hand.

He doesn't turn the lamp on. He just flops onto his unmade bed. Sighs. The old comforter is cool and soft against his back, and it makes him more aware of how tired he is. How his body aches, from the arches of his feet to the spot between his shoulders. He lets himself close his eyes and rest. Not sleep, not yet, but... rest.

It has been a long day. Even without the unexpected emotional rollercoaster that was the last half-hour with Wade, Peter's attended two classes and worked in his undergraduate lab; had lunch with MJ where she scrutinized the purpling bags under his eyes; went to a brief meeting with Jameson that ended, as always, with a headache; and patrolled for half the night as Spiderman.

Peter almost doesn't want to look at his phone screen. If he marks the time, it will make the lateness of the night real, make his tiredness real.

But he still needs to text Wade.

Groaning, Peter forces himself to turn on his phone. The white glow of the screen is bright in the darkness and it proclaims that it is 2:47. Below that are notifications, several of which are unread messages from Wade:

>> u left ur burrito >> [wade-mouth-full-of-food-scarred-cheeks-puffed-out-like-a-chipmunk.png] >> dinners on me next time and next time >> [heart on fire emoji] [taco emoji] [fart cloud emoji]

Warmth pools in Peter's chest. He double taps the picture so it fills his screen. Peter's eyes trace the exposed curves of Wade's face: his straight nose, his strong jaw, the high crest of his cheekbones. I kissed him, Peter thinks. And he kissed me back. And after tomorrow—

After tomorrow.

Peter worries his bottom lip with his teeth as he sets his phone face-down on his naked chest. A strange sense of dread-but-not-dread is curled up inside him next to his confidence and anticipation. He isn't nervous about breaking into one of Kingpin's facilities, hacking into their system, and downloading everything he needs—that Matt needs—to get the DA's office interested, especially not with Wade providing the right distraction. And he's not nervous about the blowjob he traded for Wade's help, either, despite his limited experience. He has everything he wanted, and more. So why is he...?

Peter's phone vibrates on his sternum.

>> [open book emoji] left on read??? [open book emoji] >> [ghost emoji] ghosted??? [ghost emoji]

Wade. The strangeness Peter feels recedes a bit. Maybe the weirdness is because of the late hour, because of his exhaustion, because of the turn the night took. After he gets some sleep, maybe the blank buzz of his thoughts will settle. He's just overreacting, overthinking, oversomething, his anxiety creeping in as he slows down.

<< About to fall asleep so... neither? << Laying down was a bad idea.

>> tired, bby?

<< Always.

>> so etch a little sketch for me sweetheart >> we can fill in the details in the morning >> [bob-ross-dabbing-paint-onto-a-canvas.gif]

"Happy little clouds," Peter says softly to himself, before responding:

<< You sure? I have class tomorrow. << I might reply sporadically.

>> whats life w/o a little surprise? >> besides ur brain is big n juicy >> [nerd face emoji] >> u prbly already have this masterminded

<< Of course I have a plan, Wade.

>> see? [eyes emoji] [eyes emoji] [eyes emoji] >> master. minded.

Peter types out the bare bones of his plans: the where, the when, the who, and the how. He has the layouts of the building they need to infiltrate, which he'll send to Wade from his laptop, and some other possibly vital pieces of information compiled into a folder. Truthfully, Wade probably doesn't need them. His role is to cause a distraction large enough to pull Kingpin's goons away from the room Peter needs to access, and if there's one thing Wade knows how to do, it's be a large distraction. Still, Peter types:

<< I can send them to you now, if you don't want to wait.

>> honestly baby boy im a guns a' blazin' katanas OUT kinda dude >> [will-smith-men-in-black-dont-even-worry-about-it.gif] >> hey non-sequitur but do u think aliens are real???

<< You literally got your arm chopped off by a Badoon weapons dealer last week.

>> u mean ARMS dealer right?

<< I'm going to bed, Wade. Goodnight.

>> [flexed biceps emoji] >> [flexed biceps emoji] >> [flexed biceps emoji] >> [flexed biceps emoji] >> [flexed biceps emoji] >> [flexed biceps emoji]

( . . . )

>> sleep tight petey pie

( . . . )

>> [flexed biceps emoji]

.

The next day, between his classes and a very sad, very soggy, half-priced bagel that masquerades as his lunch, Peter and Wade hash out the details. They pin down a time and two point five contingency plans. They also pick a rooftop rendezvous point where, at just past midnight, Wade stands with his hands on his hips and comments, "Well, this is very hand-wavy, but I guess that could have gone worse."

In the distance, another boom echoes through the night.

"Could have gone better, though," he concedes. "Man, I did not mean to blow that much shit up."

"Is it... supposed to keep exploding?" Peter asks faintly.

"Your guess is as good as mine. That C4 has been stashed in the depths of my closet for god knows how long. I didn't think plastic explosives went bad but hey, I've always been a guns guy." Wade takes a small square device out of one of the many pouches clipped to his tactical belt. He smacks it a few times, hard against the butt of his hand, as though it were a flashlight with dying batteries. "That or my wireless detonator is being temperamental. Encrypted radio signals my sweet left butt cheek—"

Another massive boom.

"Ah," Wade says. "I guess it is working."

"Just how much C4 did you rig?"

"A lot, baby boy. A lot."

Smoke rises against the skyline and the high, thin wail of sirens cuts through the ambient sounds of the city. Peter is both shocked and impressed by the level of destruction Wade managed to wreak in a single half hour. He can't say he's upset by it—Fisk is an evil cockroach who comes back no matter how many times he's been squashed—but it does make Peter worry for Wade.

"I realize this might be a belated question," Peter says. "But you aren't going to be targeted for this, are you?"

Wade shrugs, and says, "No more and no less than usual. One of the upsides of being a man for hire is that most people assume my actions are the dictates of whoever can pay me. No one knows the difference between that and when I do something for literally any other reason. And those shitheads," Wade jerks a thumb in the vague direction of the building he blew up. "They certainly aren't gonna realize that I'm helping out my friendly neighborhood Spiderman instead of exacting some form of revenge for a rival crime lord. I also miiiiight have gone around yelling, 'You know what you did, Fiskers!' for extra obfuscation. You know, as a treat." Wade looks away from his handiwork to Peter. "You get what you need?"

"Right here." Peter pats his thigh, where he stashed the flash drive in a slim, hidden pocket the exact size of a lighter. It is the only pocket he has and he always uses it for this exact purpose. Well, carrying flash drives and crumpled five dollar bills for the hot dog stand. "Just need to get it to Matt."

"A little late night assignation in the devil's secret lair?" Wade wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.

"Yeah, it's called dropping it off at his office and leaving immediately." Peter rolls his eyes. Then—because the night went well, because he's feeling good and flirty and maybe a little jittery—he says, mock flippantly, "Besides, I already have plans for the evening."

"Oh?" Wade says. "What kind of plans?"

"After I drop this evidence off, I'm going to head home. I'm going to take a shower, then text a certain mercenary my address. Then... well, I did offer a certain service in exchange for his services."

Wade hums, a small noise of acknowledgement, before stepping into Peter's personal bubble, crowding him. Only a sliver of negative space exists between them. Their difference in stature and build is emphasized when they stand together like this; the top of Peter's head grazes the underside of Wade's chin, and Wade's bulky frame is nearly double that of Peter's rangy limbs. Peter sways forward unconsciously, wanting to be closer.

"And what, exactly, is the payment for this mercenary's time and expertise?" Wade asks. His voice has dropped half an octave. It's the voice Wade uses when he's pissed off or about to do something reckless. Or dangerous. Or all of the above. It's the same voice Wade used last night, when he told Peter to shut up, when he told Peter exactly how he wanted him. Peter already knows he's probably going to develop an embarrassing Pavlovian response if Wade continues to talk like that.

Peter doesn't answer. He feels like he's boiling inside his suit. His mouth is dry and his tongue sticks to his hard palate.

"Tell me," Wade murmurs, tilting his head so his masked mouth hovers by Peter's temple. They still aren't touching. "I want to hear what you're gonna give me."

"My mouth," Peter manages to whisper.

"Your mouth." Wade presses a knuckle gently against Peter's sternum. Beneath the bone, his heart jackrabbits. "Gonna get you naked and put you on your knees."

Peter's eyes flutter shut.

"You have such a pretty mouth, baby boy," Wade croons. "Fucking love it when you let me see you, mask rolled up over your cute little nose. Love it when you eat, when you talk, when you smile at me. Love it when you pout, when you frown. You chew on your lip a lot, did you know that? When you're thinking hard about something. Or when you want to say something but don't know how to say it." Wade's knuckle slides a little further down Peter's body, stopping just below his belly button. "And now you're gonna let me stuff it full. Do you like Thai?"

The sudden change in subject, the abrupt switch from praise to food preferences, is disorienting. Peter isn't entirely sure he heard right.

"W-what?"

"Do you like Thai?"

"Thai?"

"You know, Som Tam, Pad See Ew, Pad Kra Pao, Panang curry," Wade continues in that low, low voice of his, though the words are at odds with the pitch. "I told you dinner was on me next time. I thought we might like to change it up from our normal Mexican routine."

"Umm, yeah, I like Thai." Wade is still touching his lower belly, still hovering by his ear, still crowding him. Peter talks, but it feels disconnected from the way his entire being vibrates, a string held taut by Wade's fingers. "There was a place by Aunt May's work we went to a lot. I liked their Tom Yum and the, uh, mango sticky rice."

"Spoiled." Wade makes Peter's dessert preference sound like an extreme indulgence. "I'll get a little bit of everything then, when I come over tomorrow."

"Wait, what?" Peter's head snaps to the side so he can look at Wade directly. Their faces are less than a breath apart. "Tomorrow? I thought you were coming over tonight!" A black tendril of self-doubt climbs into Peter's brain. "Or do you... do you not want to?"

"Baby boy, if I did what I wanted, I would have fucked you raw the second I got my smoky ass up on this roof, so don't think those dumb thoughts that you're currently thinking in your usually brilliant brain." Wade rubs his nose against Peter's. His voice has returned to its normal register. "Of course I want to. But your tank is on empty. You're going to crash from the adrenaline in oh, twenty minutes, give or take."

"No I'm not," Peter says petulantly.

"Yeah, you are," Wade says back.

"Nuh-uh."

"Uh-huh."

"Wade, come on," Peter whines. He's less overwhelmed, now, and he can finally put his hands on Wade's firm chest without wanting to explode like Wade's expired C4. "Why won't you just let me suck your dick like we planned?"

A short pause. Then Wade mumbles, "Yes, I know he's begging, I'm right fucking here." Another short pause, like the missing side of a phone conversation. "Shut up, you voyeuristic parasites, this is my blowjob, not yours, and I'll get it how I want it—"

"Waaaaaaade," Peter cajoles, poking Wade in the ribs. "Pay attention to meeeeeeee."

"Sorry, sweetheart, the peanut gallery is going nuts."

"Bad pun, booooo."

"Can't always shell it out—"

Peter boos again.

"Okay okay okay, I'll stop." The white eyes of Wade's mask are curved into half-moons, the way they do when Wade is about to laugh. "Seriously, though. Not tonight. You're dead on your feet. I want you to swing your cute little butt to Hell's Kitchen, give the devil his due, then swing home and sleep for a minimum of eight hours. Then when you wake up, you're gonna eat breakfast and take it easy. Do whatever normal college students do on a Saturday. Study, play video games, doom scroll on Twitter, whatever. You are not going to text me until seven."

"Seven?"

"Seven pee-ehm Eastern Standard Time, for clarification. Not a minute before. Alright?"

Peter grumbles incoherently.

"Do it before then and ♪~I'll make you wait another night~♪," Wade sing-songs.

"Okay, Jesus, not before seven!" Peter laughs despite himself. "I can't believe you're making me wait to give you a blowjob."

"What can I say? I'm a man of hidden depths."

For a few minutes, they stand together quietly. Peter knows the night is coming to a close because—as Wade predicted—the adrenaline is fading out of Peter's system and being replaced by lethargy. Neither of them have real reason to linger on the rooftop save for the unshakeable fact that neither wants to be the first to go.

"Alright, alright," Wade says quietly as he takes one, two, three steps back. Peter's hands fall empty to his sides. "I know how much you hate seeing me leave but love watching me go, so..."

Wade takes a few more steps back. Stops.

"Seven," Peter croaks.

"Seven," Wade answers. Another several steps. "Thai?"

"Thai's good."

Another step. "Yeah that's—" Wade clears his throat. Step. He reaches the edge, calves bumping the concrete. "I'll just—ah, you know what? Fuck it."

Wade's boots crunch on the gravel as he stalks back to Peter, who's already yanking the bottom half of his mask up over his nose, ready for what he knows is coming. When they meet, their lips connect first; then Peter's hands are on Wade's shoulders; then Wade's palms are gripping Peter's thighs; then Peter's legs are around Wade's thick waist. The kiss is filthier, wetter, hungrier than the last two they shared, Wade's tongue and teeth unrelenting as he tries to taste all he can of Peter's mouth. Peter feels that instant dizziness once again. His entire world has narrowed to the feel of Wade against him, holding him.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Wade groans as his teeth move down Peter's jaw to his throat. Peter tilts his head back for him. "Can't believe I thought I was just gonna leave you—"

Wade bites into the soft flesh below the hinge of Peter's jaw, worrying it crimson, coaxing the blood as close to the thin veneer of Peter's skin as he can without breaking it. Peter sobs at the tide of sensation, hips flexing.

"Please," Peter cries. "Please, I need you to—"

"No," Wade growls against his throat. The grip Wade has on his thighs tightens, forcing Peter to stop rolling his hips against Wade's stomach. Peter doesn't wear a cup, just a plain jockstrap, and he's gotten so hard so fast it's painful. He wants to grind himself against Wade until he comes, but Wade isn't letting him.

"Wade, please—"

"I said no, baby boy."

"Please?" Peter tries again more sweetly. "I won't—I won't text you until—til seven, I promise, I promise, but—oh god—I need—"

"I know, trust me, I know," Wade says, soothingly. His thumbs are rubbing little circles into Peter's thighs. "I should have just left, but you kept looking at me and I'm selfish and I couldn't not give you a goodnight kiss. But that's all it's gonna be, Pete. A goodnight kiss. No more until tomorrow."

Peter makes a small noise of frustration and tries to break Wade's hold on his hips. He can't, even though he's physically stronger than Wade, because Wade has better leverage. Peter balls one hand into a fist and beats it against Wade's back, taking out some of his resentment on Wade.

"Asshole!" Peter chokes out.

"I know. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have, I know, but I couldn't help it." Wade tucks his face into the crook of Peter's neck again. "I'll make it up to you. Pinky swear. Just... let it out, okay?"

Peter hits Wade in the back again, because Wade is a dick, then clings to him, trembling. He's been violently yanked back and forth between arousal and non-arousal so many times in the past twenty-four hours that he doesn't know whether to be angry about it or sullen. So he shakes, torn by his frustration, and lets Wade comfort him.

"I hate you," Peter mumbles once he feels normal again. Impressively, Wade is still holding him. Despite his size, Peter is not light. "I know you said you didn't want an angry blowjob, but I have a feeling that's what you're gonna get."

"Then I get an angry blowjob." Wade lets Peter down gently. "You okay to swing around? I can call you a taxi, if you want. I know a guy. Good guy. Won't tell anyone he carted Spiderman around, because he knows I'll use his entrails as Christmas lights if he does."

Peter wrinkles his nose.

"God, you're so cute when you're grossed out." Wade boops the tip of Peter's nose. "But seriously, you good? You look like you're going to fall asleep standing."

Peter feels it. He's completely drained. Wade's acknowledgement of it makes him yawn, his mouth opening so wide that his jaw cracks. He'll be fine, though. He's swung home tired before. Hell, he's swung home with wounds and broken bones and blood loss before. He'll be fine.

"If you say so, baby boy," says Wade. Then, as quick as a strike, he presses a small kiss to Peter's cheek. There's a big, shit-eating grin on his face when he pulls back, and he dodges the half-hearted swipe Peter aims at his head. "Okay, last one til tomorrow, gonna go now before you kill me, toodles, exeunt stage right!"

The last bit is a shout caught by the wind as Wade flings himself off the roof. There's a grappling hook sunk into the ledge and a thunk as Wade's boots hit the side of the building. They're pretty high up, but Wade will be on the street within seconds; he rappels nearly as fast as Peter falls. Peter knows this because, a few years ago, Wade goaded him into seeing who could get from the top of the Chrysler Building down to the street fast, loser buys tacos.

Wade had bought tacos. It was their first meal together. The first time Wade had rolled up his mask and the first time Peter had rolled up his.

Tomorrow, they'll have another meal like that. This time without masks completely. And it's this thought that keeps Peter going for the next hour, fueling him through the trip to Matt's office; pushing him on the journey back home; and helping him peel off his suit and scrub the sweat and smoke off his skin. When he collapses into bed, he falls asleep almost instantly, and dreams of nothing.

.

Part 3

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#spideypool #spiderman #deadpool #peter parker #wade wilson #rating: e #pairing: wade wilson/peter parker

[youkidding-me]

This might not be news to anyone but still I have Thoughts on ep 11 and I'll fart them here.

Kinn and Porsche had a wonderful time this episode, they were honestly the happiest part of the entire episode. Last time we saw them this happy uninterruptedly was on ep 8. Let's put a pin on that.

One of my favorite scenes was when Khun asks Porchay about the protagonist and Porchay said that the protagonist doesn't die but the villain does. Like, it's pretty straightforward and I gasped so loud. I don't know why I didn't think it was foreshadowing the first time Khun asked Porsche about it but now it's quite obvious what they are doing. (Also khun is playing chess and winning and he said he is "loving to play" but i don't have the mental capacity to analyse that someone do it please.)

And then we have the pool conversation between Porchay and Porsche. The way Porsche insists he has to protect both of them and that he will be fine. I was hmmmmm the entire time becase this series literally never leaves a plotline go and I found it suspicious how they kept emphasizing that Porsche is no longer Kinn's bodyguard.

All this mixed in my brain and my conclusion is that something terrible will happen to either Kinn or Porsche soon. My guess is that it will be Kinn, because them saying the protagonist doesn't die might be to say he will (has) to survive whatever horrible thing he's going to go through. He could also get terribly hurt but not in a "protagonist won't die" way, but in a "the protagonist won't die, no one said anything about the other characters", which could be a way of telling us Porsche is the protagonist. Porsche could be the one getting hurt in this scenario, which would tie with his promise to Porchay.

I still think it's more likely that Kinn will be terribly hurt/ go through something awful that threatens his life because of a theory I saw a while ago (whoever has the post link it please) about how Porsche is the queen and Kinn is the king in the chess and even though taking down the king is the goal, the queen is such a strong piece that sometimes players put their king in check to protect her.

Anyway, because of their happy date this episode and how ep 8 was followed by ep 9, I fully expect whatever it is to happen next week.

#kinnporsche meta #kinnporsche #kinnporsche ep 11

[fablecore]

Feel free to ignore this, it Will Be Long, Probably.

I've been faffing around with this message for the past week or so but my brain won't let me rest until I word-vomit my adoration for your work and mind-mechanics at you.

I had to have re-read MNP about three or four times in said past week, and am currently on the probably fifth one, but who really knows at this point. I may have a slight problem.

The point I'm trying to make is that the pineapple witch has worked her magic on me as she has on so many others. Every re-read seems to pull me deeper. Even though I know exactly what will happen at this point, I still laugh at every mean quip, still gasp at every tense moment, still read through blurry eyes at Several Chapters That Shan't Be Named.

I honestly lack the vocabulary and word-sense to express myself properly, but I'll try anyway, because if nothing else your writing deserves to be sung its praises.

Your story made me honestly and critically consider the world with open eyes.

I find a lot of myself in Sophie. A little too much. A little too weird. A little bit sheltered, maybe naive. Blindfolded and ear-muffed would be a decent metaphor. It's been hard, growing out of that, but I've been trying. And reading your work has helped a lot.

Your writing, for lack of better wording, sparks. It's life, and joy, and familial banter, and struggle with all its ugly faces, and yes it's angry and vicious and unforgiving too. It slaps you with a novel view of the world and you either agree and move on or are forced to contemplate why exactly it rubs you the wrong way.

The care with which you crafted the story is evident in every word and comma and period. Several foreshadowed moments had me gripping my head and moaning in pain because I Knew what was coming, but I had to keep reading to find out how it impacts the world you built. The characters are lived in, and the dialogue flows so naturally it feels as if you're right in the middle of the bantering and arguing.

Which brings me to my next point: roomboom. I want to put them in my mouth and never let go.

They seem made for each other, and yeah they probably are, but you ruined all other Law ships for me. And to be honest all other OP crews too beside the Hearts. I love all the idiots to bits and pieces.

But back to roomboom. They're a particular flavour of weird devotion I didn't know I was looking for in my ships and will now never find again. I will be eternally forced to re-read MNP for a glimpse of what true love is. I hope you're happy.

The candid way they treat each other, the way they fit like puzzle pieces with their weirdo interests and weirdo personalities, the way they're their own people with Several Issues, but somehow seem to work out still despite their differences. The deep respect they have for each other and the people in their lives. The way they went from (I hate you and wanna beat you up why won't you die) to (I love you and wanna beat you up please let me die with you) is just... unbearable.

Their journey has been a long and winding one, amd still has some mole-hills ahead, but they've given me hope that for every weirdo out there, even a frizzy-haired, burnt-to-hell, panic farting alchemist-witch, there is an even weirder person waiting for them.

TLDR; I want to put the entirety of your writing into my mouth and swallow it, and also would it be alright to make a personal use bookbind of MNP because I need it in my hands.

(I'm deep in Cherry Bomb Alchemy atm, love how they already married and divorced like 5 times, peak roomboom energy, keep up the good work)

thank you so much, oh my goodness. my heart is so full ❣️ "for every weirdo out there, there is an even weirder person waiting for them" made me laugh. it's so true.

the thing about growing up is it never ends. it often takes a strong electric shock to get the ball rolling, and i'm happy mnp could be that for you. books were also my first step into the world beyond me. it's a really special feeling. for as long as we live, let's cherish it 😎 👍

please bookbind mnp! and please take photos! seeing it would mean everything to me, i think i would cry 😭🤍💗

i appreciate this message so much. i'm a slow writer, but i will keep trying my best. and i hope the world perceives you as wonderfully as you have perceived me. have a great day 💐💐💐

#letters #宝 #sophiefic

[knighted-princess]

So, one of the discussions on a future Mario Bros. movie idea got me thinking about making a new plot for a more Luigi centric sequel. After a spark of inspiration, here is my idea. (Also, feel free to critique or add as you see fit. This isn't a complete story, but simply just some of my ideas gently woven together. Brain fart moments on what to do with Mario and Peach for most of this! Sorry!!! Now, on with the show!)

Let's a go!

Luigi, being a bit more skeptical about the Mushroom Kingdom's magical dynamics, decides to hit the books for research. The Mushroom Kingdom must have some form of library, right?

If not, then castle probably has a whole collection of books and magical items. So, we put Mario, Princess Peach, and Luigi into the library looking into books on the history of the Mushroom Kingdom (with vague plot details or Peach's past or something).

Of course, Mario and Princess Peach are in love, but they are still figuring it out, so Luigi excuses himself to give the two love birds some space. He probably just heads to another row of shelves, (to keep some closeness to Mario,) but he finds a magical item, that catches his eye (I want to say a painting, so I will say a painting). There is a painting, and Luigi, having his not so great history of clumsiness, falls into the painting. Except, it doesn't break. Instead, he gets teleported elsewhere.

Luigi wakes up to a desert place, where some Big Bad Evil is trying to take over, but he spots a girl trying to stop it, leading a small resistance party. Of course, it's Princess Daisy, but Luigi just falls in love with her, (or admires her) without knowing that detail. He tries to help her, but after helping a bit, he ends up unconscious. (He probably got sidetracked by her beauty!)

He wakes up, and spots Daisy. They are both surprised that they found another human existing here, but she's even more surprised about Luigi's past destination. The Mushroom Kingdom doesn't exist on her map!

Luigi tries to explain his situation, and Princess Daisy suggests that it is related to something with the Big Bad Evil. However, in order to fix things, they must stop the Big Bad Evil.

Luigi is freaking out at this point, but Daisy encourages him to help her. (In the way that Princess Peach encouraged Mario, I could see a similar role for Princess Daisy.)

During the journey, Luigi starts to get more confidence in his abilities. (Maybe Daisy says that the guardians of some magical relic, that sent Luigi there, only allow heroes of legendary potential to travel into her land. Yes, maybe it's for his ego too.) Luigi asks how she knows about that, but Daisy cleverly dodges the question, by distracting him, an effective technique in both battle and awkward conversations!

Along the way, Luigi finds out that there are a lot of galaxies out there, and Daisy wants to explore them all. Daisy explains that she couldn't do that when she was younger because she grew up with strict parents, but now, she wants to explore the world beyond her kingdom/hometown. (This is before Luigi finds out she is a princess!) Luigi, being a gentleman, offers to help her see the world. He thinks about showing her the worlds that Mario has discovered around the Mushroom Kingdom. Since her name is Daisy, maybe she would like a bouquet of flowers from a meadow that Mario dragged him to, while talking about getting Peach a bouquet of flowers. Luigi smiles happily in dreamland, before Daisy knocks him back into reality.

(If we have to have a 1-up, I would like Daisy to find it and give it to Luigi. She gets embarrassed, much to her surprise and confusion, and tells Luigi that it is green like him, and that it is considered good luck to eat it, for it gives the power of second chances. Luigi, remembering the cool stuff that Mario told him about power-ups, politely accepts it and eats it. He decides that the universe is giving him a second chance to be strong enough to help the people around him.)

#mario #luigi #princess peach #princess daisy #super mario brothers #mario brothers #super mario bros #super mario #super luigi #luigi my beloved #thinking out loud #thoughts? #mario galaxy #1-up #1up #mushroom kingdom #sarasaland #luigi finally builds more self confidence #1 up #but no one has to die #mario bros #smb #mario movie #super mario bros movie #mario bros movie #the mario bros #mario and luigi #teamwork #build onto the romance between mario and peach from the previous movie into the new one #I am not an artist so I create through my words and music