#but i think her passion and inspiration for cooking and the way it drives her really strikes me as a ravenclaw trait somehow

[catchabiifyoucan]

Note: please pardon my grammatical errors in advance since English is my second language, will travel with limited time to write, proofread and edit my blogs and tiredness/sleep deprivation.

February 8-9, 2024

Here I am writing while being in the middle of nowhere in the air. 4 hours left and 6 more hours to go. 10 hours flight time in total to Cairo, Egypt from Dulles Airport in VA.

I didn’t have a good sleep last night because I was very overstimulated, overtired and anxious about my upcoming trip. As I mentioned before that I haven’t gone on the solo international trip since 2012. I went to Nigeria alone when I just graduated from college and went there to celebrate my mom’s late 50th birthday.

Fun fact about me

Personally, I am not a social butterfly but love to tell stories through social media (instagram) where I usually share pictures/videos and real life experiences. I often make stories about my cooking/baking as I enjoy trying different cuisines/pastries. My kids love to try mine and give ratings.

I used to be a high school teacher for the deaf and left my career to become a full time stay at home mom. No regrets. I am very fortunate to be able to have good relationships with my kids. My kids are my everything.

I have a longtime dream which is to travel around the world with my family for a year. Before my boy(s) was/were born, we were a family of 4 and usually traveled a lot visiting different countries. But then having one/two more kids and COVID happened had pausing our travels. And it’s getting really expensive to travel with 4 kids now. I hope we will be able to travel and visit at least 2 countries within two years. Life happens, you know? I have passion for traveling because I find it very fun to discover the unknown and exciting.

N and S are my inspiration and my number one followers. They are mainly why I am so eager to write blogs again because I want them to jump into my world while I explore and learn more about my Nigerian culture. I simply love to tell stories and educate my kids about life in general. I am a teacher and storyteller at heart.

Anyway, let’s go back to the story about my first day of travel today. Day #1

I couldn’t sleep in the early morning, so I decided to bake banana breads for my kids (their other favorite pastry) and my sister and her family in Nigeria who I plan to stay with for a few days.

The bananas were not very ripe but will be in a few days so why not using them up before they turn spoiled.

Yes, I baked banana breads in 2-3 am in the morning because I couldn’t sleep due to being overstimulated. And I was thinking too much and very anxious about my upcoming trip to Nigeria. Like I said before, I had not gone on solo trip in a very long time.

After baking banana breads, I was watching a Netflix series for a little. I told myself I had to go back to sleep for 1-2 hours and I did. So yea, my sleeping schedule has messed up big time. And I know I will not be able to sleep well in Nigeria when I arrive there because it’s six hours difference between Nigeria and USA. Let’s see how fresh the bread will be after 20+ hour. Would they stay moist? I packed the bread for my sister and her family. Hoping they will like the bread. I couldn’t wait to eat a slice of banana bread whenever I get hungry in the plane.

I had hugged my kids close to my heart because they grow up fast before my eyes even blinked. And they are my precious gems.

After my kids going to school this morning, my partner, Harish, dropped me off at the metro station nearby. He couldn’t drop me off at the airport because it would be an hour drive each way. I could take an Uber but the fare is insanely and ridiculously expensive. No thanks! I am frugal and a hardcore hustler/ baragin finder. Thanks to my N, I was able to ride the metro for free using her kids ride free smart trip card. She has saved me $4-6!

The con about using the metro is the long ride- 23 stops and an hour trip. Harish said the metro (train) cars would not be very busy or crowded and he was right. It was not like before (pre-COVID). The cars were less crowded and quiet. So, I was able to rest a little and little sleepy due to baking banana bread and insufficient sleep.

Leaving my family this morning was not easy. I was surprised that I was not very emotional like crying or something. I guess I was too tired to feel sad or cry.

Arriving at the airport exactly an hour later. The silver line to the airport was added a few years ago and is now effective/convenient for travelers/commuters.

Dulles Airport is very extremely big and it takes a lot of walking from the metro station to the ticketing office. Lot of escalators and steps to take but here I arrived there before 10 am. My flight would be boarding around 1050. So I had some time to rest and talk a little on the phone with my loved one.

Not lot of people here- no long line for security checkpoint or checkin for tickets. Easy and quick.

When it was time to get into the plane, I went inside and found my seat. I was immediately upset because the leg room was so small. I kid you not. I am only five feet and 4 inches tall considering myself a petite short person and there was not much room left for me to rest my legs. My phone fell down by the side of window, and I had hard time reaching down because I couldn’t move, wiggle or bend my legs. What I always look forward going on international plane is food and entertainment.

Unfortunately, EgyptAir airline is the worst flight ever even though the plane has not moved yet. Why? No one cared enough to make sure I am accommodated or having full accessibility due to my deafness. No warm welcome. I waited and waited for the stewards to come to me and explained to me about the safety. Don’t think they knew. But one knew I was deaf because I asked if there is any movie that has English subtitles since I am deaf. The steward helped me and then said sorry. Believe it or not, there is only one movie that has English subtitles while the rest of movies/shows have Arabic subtitles. Oh great. I was like wow what would I do for ten hours if I never brought my iPad. Thank god I downloaded offline Netflix shows/series.

I guess I must be very tired because when I woke up I was in the air already. I didn’t feel the take off or anything. How strange. I usually am a very light sleeper and can feel movement easily. But no, I missed the takeoff. Oh well. And, I was not very comfortable due to very small space here. I fed up and decided to write a message for the steward. I explained that I would like to know if there was any important announcement for my safety.

I also told him that I want to sit alone because I do not feel comfortable tapping someone’s shoulder for him to move so I can get out of seat and go to the bathroom. I do not have strong bladder, so I can imagine how frustrated he would be if I keep tapping his shoulder or interrupt his sleep every time I need to go to the bathroom. The steward found three empty seat row and asked me if it was ok for me to sit there. Of course!

I feel much better after moving to new seat assignment. Finally, I can breathe and be more comfortable here. I took a nap and it was not that great or comfortable but it was better than nothing. More leg room.

Foods are not that yummy. Just ok-ok. Subpar food and entertainment. That is what I get what I pay for.

No snacks. Just one meal platter and one small sandwich. Don’t think they will serve any more food or snacks. Good thing I brought my own snacks to feed my hunger if needed. Can’t wait to eat that slice of banana bread that I made a few hours ago.

I didn’t sleep well because I swear I felt like I was in the snow globe that was constantly shaken! The plane was tumbling too often and too much. That scared me a lot because I didnt know if it was normal or could led to dangerous condition. Was it because of the bad storm or what? What caused the bad turbulence? How annoying! I felt like you had seen enough snowfalls, why keep shaking me up? You know?

I couldn’t think of any good thing about this EgyptAir Airline- I guess it’s just this very affordable fare to book with good itinerary. The layer is not too long though.

Sigh. Only three hours left now. Then a three hours layover then catching another flight to Lagos for 6 hours.

I do not know what time now is. I get lost with time and everything. Good disconnection I guess.

See next story for more pictures.

[ducknotinarow]

📝Nina Rogers

| Send me 📝 and i'll give you a random amount of headcanons/facts about my muse!

So similar to Richard we'll do some meta stuff though I feel there is more I can say on Nina? I'll also cover her relationship with Autumn since you don't get that much on the blog.

Nina is actually short for Valentina, so on official Documents and such she is listed as such. Mainly she just goes by Nina. Full name Valentina 'Nina' Sarah Rogers.

Even though shes adopted, i never gave her a last name from before cause shes just Rogers to me XD

Like Richard nina also had some character inspirations behind her creation I know I said one before but I'll repeat myself.

Rapheal from tmnt 2003. It's why her color is red and why Nina tends to deal with simallair story beats in a sense. I guess her Leo would be another oc that belongs to my friend Jasmine. They are rivals and yet they do work well together. They butt heads a lot and fight the second eyes lock.

Nina is far more sensitive so she gets angry easy and tends to rely on that anger when it comes to fighting. She just learned far sooner that isn't smart thanks to Steve. She still has her bad temper she just dose better at controlling it but like her Lantia blood suggests shes a hot head for sure.

Another inspiration because Sailor Moon seems to impact a lot of what I do XD. Is Makoto from Sailor Moon. I always loved how she was the tallest, and Strongest of the group but was also one of the most feminine characters in the series with dreams of falling in love, having a family, and being all into cooking.

Originally Nina used to have a ponytail for this connection. Nina does still have her more feminine trait now. Nina doesn't dress girly but she is very into beauty products also keep her out of the kitchen u-u.

Nina has been an avid fan of Steve for as long as she can recall. She got invested in him as she got older and learned about his story of being this poor sick kid from Brooklyn that became the Hero known as Steve Rogers. And it inspired Nina to do good for others despite her own situations. Being a hot head landed her in a lot of trouble for fighting, however. Steve didn't become her hero though till taking her under his wing and being a mentor to her.

Nina is a hopeless romantic in truth she's a sap for a good love story and claims shes a cupid, she has helped people get together in the end but she shouldn't meddle u-u

This is why Nina's own romantic history is a tad messy. She falls in love kind of easily in that sometimes a girl just says so much as hi and Nina's head over heels.

Despite her break-ups and such Nina has never been against dating and has had both short-term and long-term relationships the shirts being a month the longer ones about half a year or more. Her final relationship though is Autumn her wife.

Nina meets Aumtun in her second year of college, they meet in the campus library where Nina needs help finding a book for a mission because something just doesn't make sense to her. This kind of leads to a lot of thier interactions. Autumn's expertise makes her a sort of secondary source for Nina to hit when she needs help. Of course, the moment she heard Autumn's voice the girl fell hard. So it became a great excuse to see this girl more.

They start to date not to long after this meeting, Autumn was the first girl Nina ever dated who truly loved Nina for all she was and saw her as more than a strong girl. She saw ninas passionate side, her drive, and more importantly her brains. Autumn is the one who told Nina how she's a quick thinker even if she makes a mistake she's able to keep her brain working in stressful moments.

Something that stuck with Nina because she was so used to others thinking she was reckless or stupid no one else ever told her that before. Sure Nina's been in love before but that was when she truly felt something deeper for another person. Finally being felt seen in a way no one else ever has.

Nina lives for social media she has an account on a lot of the main sites.

Twitter: Where she is the most mainly to post updates on her hero work it's been a good way to connect with people and send out alerts for people to clear areas.

Instagram: Is mostly her posting pictures of herself around the tower leaving for missions or returning she never post the same days those go on just to be safe. Has posted many photos of Steve's dad get ups. Lots of Cooper photos

TikTok: Shes usually follows the trends roping Brook, Peter, and even Astrid into joining her. Peter usually has more idea on what's going on and tends to work the camera since he has experience. Lots of skits to trending sounds or dance videos

snapchat: this is mostly her and Aumutn just sending photos back and forth to each other

Nina deff had a Myspace back in the day, she has a facebook but don't use it when people left Myspace. She once had tumblr but she wasn't much of a blogger and just assumed that all it was for.

Nina always wanted to be part of a family. Her own was such a mess and torn apart. Mom didn't want a kid (fair) Dad was stuck with her and seemed to always wish to get away from her. She had a grandmother she often was dumped off to but they weren't exactly always wanting to babysit her.

You can say this adds a lot to her trust issues.And why she can be fast to pull others in despite it.

In truth the reason she can't stand Drac? he reminds her too much of her biological sperm donor. Nina doesn't care if she gets hurt its why she rushes into fights and takes all the hits she can so someone else won't have to. But she fears him hurting Steve again and Brooklyn. To her he hasn't done a thing to prove he won't leave them (I will say him leaving CABEL would be the start to her agreeing to reconsider)

It's unfair to Drac but that's a whole land mine for Nina an issue and area she doesn't want to touch on if she can avoid it.

Very rough I need to work on this but this is Nina's hero logo an 'S' with a star shape. Nina design a lot of her own brand in a sense even her hero costume she designs before having Tony get it set up to be made.

Next to Steve Nina also admires Tony Stark, mostly for his achievements in inventions and he's the reason she goes to school for engineering he encouraged it even. When she was first brought in he took note of her interests and ended up getting her a scholarship and more for her remaining high school years. This did cause some issues between them Nina not wanting a hand own but he made it clear it never was a hand out he truly thinks she has a mind that needs to be 'properly looked at' an insult and compliment. Tony is differently a second father figure to her no matter the verse. Often when mad at Steve it's Tony she goes too

Natasha is her third idol and the one she learned most her fighting from when she wanted to prove herself to Steve.

Nina’s favorite way to excuse anything she dose is say it’s because she’s [insert random star sign here] Nina doesn’t know her star sing nor understand anything about this stuff so she’s always saying whatever ones comes to mind

#muse| nina rogers #aflockofffeathers #madamkezzie #muse bio: nina rogers #meme answers #stay queued #((sorry work drined me soo headcannons I offer ^^; I didn't get to write tho so you got new meme stuff soon and such uwu))

[dollsome-does-tumblr]

because i have been in fandom since the year 2000 and therefore this is how my brain works, i think this is my current hogwarts house sorting point of view on the gilmore girls characters. how far off am i from what you would choose? (yes. this is THE most 2000s internet conversation to be having in 2021.)

gryffindors: lorelai, lane, logan, christopher

hufflepuffs: luke, dean, kirk

ravenclaws: rory, jess, sookie

slytherins: paris, richard, emily, taylor

#i know sookie seems like the pure embodiment of all things hufflepuff #but i think her passion and inspiration for cooking and the way it drives her really strikes me as a ravenclaw trait somehow #it's the creativity!!!! #also christopher strikes me as sort of a failed gryffindor #in that i think his values are to be brave and valiant but he can never live up to them #so i guess what i'm saying here is chris is peter pettigrew #i think logan is kind of in a similar boat though we briefly got to see him rise to his potential #somewhat same with dean because the concept of a hufflepuff with an anger problem is tricky #but i do think his core values are all hufflepuff-y #also i kinda feel like my slytherin section is too easy #but i really do feel like ambition is the driving factor for all those people! #is this a silly way to spend my wednesday evening #dollsome's deep thoughts #gilmore girls #also i like to think of lorelai as a gryffindor who would've been a hufflepuff otherwise #and luke as a hufflepuff who would've been a gryffindor otherewise #*otherwise #this is why together they are Good

[callmehopeless]

ALL TOO WELL

Adam Sackler x Reader

Plot: A passionate moment can make you feel like you're on top of the world. But when you're living in hindsight: it all comes tumbling back.

Warnings: Angst, unhealthy relationships

A/N: I can't stop listening to the 10 minute version of Taylor Swift's All Too Well, so I wrote a fic that took inspiration from it. But honestly - this is an amalgamation of my experiences, of that soundtrack, of Adam Driver's excellent portrayal of the deeply flawed and utterly shitty Adam Sackler, and the very real way relationships that are based on that sort of passion crumple under the weight of it. I don't skimp on the hard parts, so this is going to be a lot to read - but I think if you like my angst and my writing, you'll find it's one of my best.

THE FIRST KISS

"Feels like you're holding back, half the time."

Tree roots spread against his neck as he lays against the pile of leaves; shirt mussed by the dry dirt and mud as his lips press together, illuminated in grey light.

Breathless; you lay beside him - veins acrid and nervous. Too nervous, when your fingers find purchase on the bark of the nearby tree.

"Holding back?"

He laughs; all dimples and soft eyes.

"Fucking hell, Kid - you really want me to say it?"

He doesn't need to.

He plucks out a ticket from his pocket - front row, absolute middle - and tucks it into your pocket with the grin of a man who knows, honestly, that you'll show up. Show up to see him, in all his glory, loving every inch of the art he's subjected himself to.

And when you lean in - electricity, that first kiss, eyes fluttering shut--

--you miss.

When your lips meet his nose, Adam Sackler bursts into glorious laughter.

It's music, and you can't help but bury your face in his chest; smelling the aftershave and the warm scent of Autumn dirt on his skin. You feel the way it rumbles in your ears; feel the way his calloused fingers push your chin up, his thumb brushing the underside of your cheek as you lean against his chest--

"You're killing me," he chuckles, eyelids heavy with want. "Fucking killing me."

And when he pulls your lips down to meet his, that first kiss burns in your throat and aches in your soul.

Finally, finally.

Finally.

A HOMECOMING

His sister - he tells you under no uncertain terms - is fucking weird.

She's got this intensity that you can't find anywhere else: almost glorious in the way she grills him, even as she flattens her palm against your back and guides you to the sofa.

There's nothing to discuss.

Every visit is the same; her weird cooking, the smell of incense. Baby Sample tears up, somewhere between dinner and dessert - Adam cooing softly, letting her settle in his broad arms as you laugh over vegan casserole and stale chocolate cake.

Halfway through a game of cards on their makeshift dining table, long after you should've left - Adam squeezes your hand under the table twice.

He doesn't look at you. Doesn't say a damned thing.

You return the two squeezes, and his hand utterly engulfs yours. Fingertips glide against your knuckles, and you remark on just how wonderful it is to date your best friend.

He keeps your hand in his - resting on your thigh - and never lets it splay above the table.

Two squeezes are enough.

Always enough.

DRIVING ON

He always hated the fucking radio.

He told you that, over and over. His ex-girlfriends would insist on the noise, and the rental cars always came with these tinny stereos that played AM radio like it was the last bastion of a dying society.

Still, though.

When you're several glasses of wine down, - he lets you sing. Lets you sing along to the radio like it's the last chance you'll ever have. Even winds down the windows - lets you swear black and blue into the night that this moment is yours.

"You ever heard this one?" he asks you, dark hair whipping by as the New York skyline approaches fast.

And when he presses play, and starts out on the first Broadway tune - he squeezes your hand as it lays in your lap.

His voice is deep, and dark, and thick as ever. Chocolate and warm breezes, when he reveals those hidden notes he reserves just for you.

He reaches for your hand, when all is said and done, and you're giddy from laughter and the heady taste of pinot.

Squeezes it twice, and then lets it go.

You never asked why.

HE'S YOURS

"Adam!"

You burst out a laugh as his hands find the dip of your back - bending you against the counter, ravenously pushing his thick thighs against yours. In the darkness of your kitchen; Adam is every inch the nearly-tabloid lead of this romantic comedy.

His arms encircle you, and his grin pushes his freckles up to the creases of his eyes.

"Caught you."

He burrows his nose into the crook of your neck; in response, you shiver as he pushes you up onto the marble surface. Your tights, already laddered, are hitched up as his fingers dip under your skirt, his hands just begging--

"Not fair. That seems like--" and you cut out, pushing your pelvis against his thigh, "--subterfuge."

His mouth finds your collarbone, and he groans - huge, naked body pressing against yours.

"You have--" he shivers, hand cupping yours "--no idea..."

Maybe you didn't.

It's all you can think about, now.

AN INTRUSION

So she just loves him.

Of course she does - doesn't everyone? Doesn't every woman orbit around Adam Sackler, Broadway Star, like he's this fucking...this role model, this undeniable flame?

Of course she loves him.

"What is it?" he pries, and it's irked. Irked by something that spills out later - but for now, in this moment, it's just bitter. Frustrated.

This is work.

You don't look up from organising the cutlery.

"Nothing."

It's a full stop - and he doesn't dare take the fucking full stop for the end of the goddamn piece. He's learned to know the inflections that are endemic to a lie: he can perfectly replicate them, you realise, as you let a spoon clatter into the drawer.

It lands where it lands; you're only halfway here, anyway.

"It's not nothing. What the fuck is wrong?"

His deep voice breaks on the question, and you stare at the silverware like it'll fall away of you don't.

And when you turn to face him - something stings in the corners of your eyes.

"Fuck's sake, Adam - what do you want me to say?"

"I want you to tell me," he grits his teeth, full lips chapped, "what you're thinking."

He doesn't.

Not really.

You pause, and it's a dead giveaway.

"She's in love with you, and I--"

"--oh COME ON!" Adam's hands run through his hair, and his jaw squares as he takes a step closer to you, "It's fucking ACTING! BROADWAY. You knew what you signed up for when you--" he sucks his teeth, foot digging into the floorboards of your apartment when he curls his lip. "--I can't. I fucking can't go through this again with you--"

"She kissed you! She did it in the restaurant right in front of me! You didn't even--" -and oh god, the aching, the tears, it just- "you didn't even FLINCH, ADAM! You don't even fucking flinch! You just let it happen, like I was supposed to just...just fucking fall into the woodwork?!"

"That's what they do! That's press, and we have to...fuck, Kid! You knew this when you took this gig. I'm trying here. I'm fucking...I'm trying."

He squeezes your hand on the handle of the drawer, breath in your ear as his plush lips dust the tip of it.

"I'm sorry," he tells you, with all of the emotion he can muster.

And not quite the words you need to hear.

SO TELL ME

It passes your vision in vignettes.

His hands, calloused, tracing up your arms - kissing your shoulderblade backstage, lips pressed like a promise. His costume would scratch your cheeks, and you'd laugh at the way he'd put on this fake British accent: stupid, it was so fucking stupid.

He hated ice cream. Hated it. Fuckin' snot and bullshit, he'd let you finish off the pint, but lick the spoon all the same.

He sobbed like a baby at the end of Titanic. Kissed the corners of your mouth when you wore oversized jumpers. Too busy, sometimes, to tell you he'd be home from work late. Ate two and a half pizzas on Friday nights; had this keychain with too many stupid knickknacks on the ring.

Danced with you, when you'd put those old records on. Lathered you in the shower - draped his arms over you every Sunday morning, right before he made you a coffee and rearranged the magnets on the fridge into cusses and swears.

He always had dirty fingernails. Never quite showered off the sweat - jogging, always leaving his shorts on the couch. Kept his secrets close to his chest - kept you close to his chest.

"I won't make the same mistake," he'd whisper, "I made with the others."

I won't make the same mistake.

I won't make the same mistake.

I won't.

BUT SOME PARTIES

...some parties, in this New York skyline, beg for Broadway.

He's on billboards, sometimes. Sometimes he lingers on the twirling pictures that embed themselves deep into your mind, long after you've fucked some other man into the mattress.

Long after you've left behind those tree roots; the clumsy kiss on his nose.

You try to write. And dream. Try to believe. Pick up a hobby - why not try it? Try that little black dress, and sip a cocktail at the art gallery?

Why not?

What stops you?

Kaleidoscopes were for children, when you were young. Beads in a microscope you could shake and shake, and they'd make the scene change just so - even as you sip another cocktail, dig your nails into another friend's arm. Three months pass, and you feel the primal pull of a thought jitter across your brain.

Just nerves and endings, even as you purse your red lips together.

"You okay?" the man asks, expression twisting into a feigned concern.

Your lips quirk.

Caught you.

"Nothing."

And you give an award-winning smile.

Broadway worthy, even.

But you just squeeze his hand once.

That's all.

AND THEN

He writes a play; some years later.

You didn't expect that - didn't care to expect it, as you pack up your things. Leaving New York is just what you needed, even if you didn't know it yet. The past leaks into cracks; divots you were never quite sure were there, even if they haunted you.

You never took the spare tickets. He left them at the theatre for several months; then, as the years passed, he stopped hoping you'd find yourself there. You always had one for the door, and when this play came out - there was one with your name on it.

You took your lighter and set it aflame; let the text crumple to nothing.

And then, in a moment of madness, in an Autumn street of a New York evening - you bought one, all the same.

Back row, and nothing special. Nobody; crumpled, as you watched the curtains pull apart.

"Feels like you're holding back," he laughed, the fake limbs brushing his deep shoulderblades, "half the time."

Well, shit.

Her hands were more careful - her kisses more perfect. When she played cards; she always won.

Her voice hit all the right notes, in that crummy hire car.

Her hips devolved him to madness, on that damned kitchen counter.

He was always home early from work. He never cried too hard at the movies they pretended to see - kept some forced composure.

And when she reached for his hand over the table,

He took it, and squeezed it twice.

"What does it mean," she'd whispered, as the spotlight shone on a distinctly disheveled bed, "when you squeeze my hand twice like that?"

And the room had gone deathly quiet.

"Oh Kid," he'd sighed to her, brushing the hair from her face, "if you don't know now, you'll never fuckin' know."

You left that theater without seeing the rest of that damned play; ticket stump crumpled to shreds in your palm.

"I won't make the same mistake," you heard him say, "I made with the others." You let the tattered paper fall into the street; and that was all.

MEANWHILE

He likes it when it passes like a blur.

It's easier like that. Life should flow a bit - pieces should come together and tear apart, and Adam Sackler isn't interested in picking apart the distinction. He likes it best when he can work, and put his all into it: tell a story, and weave something from the potholes he finds as he walks on by.

She curls her hand around his bicep as the cameras flash; vultures, all of them. Pushing themselves onto him until he concedes - allows himself to be engulfed by it.

He reaches his calloused hand into his pocket, right as she plants a kiss right onto his cheek.

She squeezes his hand twice - as the show demands - and his hand curls in his pocket.

A frayed, yellowed ticket stub follows his index finger; he chases it, letting the feel of the worn ink placate his tattered nerves. A habit he's yet to abandon: Adam pushes his lips into a dimpled smile. Forced, and lifeless - and real as he can make it.

He squeezes the paper twice in his pocket. Feels it crumple, as it has a thousand times before.

Squeezes it twice, and then lets it go.

You never asked why.

Taglist: @maskheraid @abstractragedy @elfieboxcat @magikevalynn @tinyplanet-explorers @tashimaruecoco @little-elizabeth @guardianangelcas @iamsupremeleader @kyloskies @kirah35 @buckylokihoes @scheherazades-horcrux @psadpsyduck @wygal @benfreakingsolo @nerfherderbinniegirl @x-avantgarde-x @emily-strange @kowalskibro @nickangel13 @ninadewitt @magikevalynn @knittykitty13 @glitzescape @bigdickdriver @thevvitches @ah-callie @hplotrfan @atomsackler @direnightshade @ktellmeastory @goodboybensolo @insatiable-ivy @kylolover96 @callmemania-pls @deanskitten @direnightshade @livelongdolan @glassythoughts @mazeltovcocktail555

#adam sackler #adam driver #adam sackler x reader #angst #girls hbo #girls #adcu #cmhwrites #cmh #callmehopeless #hbo girls

[pokemonswshbutionlyplayedsword]

I recently read one of your posts about what the gym leaders dislike the most about each other, so I want to request a post about what they like the most about each other :)

Hell yeah, spread positivity.

Milo:

-Nessa: Her confidence. Milo admires the way she seems to never let anyone get her down.

-Kabu: His advice. Kabu always seems to know what to say, and Milo really appreciates that.

-Bea: Her care for her pokemon. For as strong as she gets, and as hard as she trains her team, she always makes sure to keep her pokemon healthy and happy.

-Allister: His individuality. Milo knows Allister the least, but the fact that he stands out unapologetically is something Milo can appreciate.

-Opal: Her tea. Milo loves visiting Opal because she gives great tea and snacks. Visits are very pleasant.

-Gordie: His jokes. Milo and Gordie share very similar humor.

-Melony: Her cooking. Milo loves a good home cooked meal and Melony’s dishes are welcome in the middle of the Circhester cold.

-Piers: His ambition. Piers was scary to Milo at first, but once they got to know each other, Milo began to realize that Piers has a lot of goals, most of which are to benefit others.

-Raihan: The way he treats his fans. Raihan seems like the type to brag and boast, but Raihan is a really cool dude. Milo can’t stand people who flaunt things too much, so the fact that Raihan could and doesn’t is appreciated.

-Leon: The way he cares about other people. Leon is always looking out for other people, and he always strives to help others around him.

Nessa:

-Milo: The way he supports his friends. Milo does a lot for his friends and supports them no matter what.

-Kabu: His passion. Kabu very clearly cares about his career, and not much holds him back. Nessa is inspired by that.

-Bea: Her strength. Nessa appreciates that Bea is super strong and doesn’t let the fact that she’s a girl hold her back. Nessa’s all about girl power.

-Allister: His humor. Not many people hear Allister tell jokes, but Nessa gets to hear pretty frequently, and he’s funny.

-Opal: Her stories. Every times Nessa sees Opal, she has another exciting story to tell about when she was younger.

-Gordie: How he stands up for himself. Nessa is on Gordie’s side when it comes to the fight with Melony. The fact that Gordie keeps going with rock types no matter is really cool.

-Melony: The way she’s a mom to everyone. Melony takes care of people no matter what, and Nessa appreciates that. Melony proves that you can be kind and strong.

-Piers: The way he does music. Nessa knows how hard it is to be a model and a gym leader at the same time. She understands how much work Piers puts in to do music and pokemon training, even when no one sees it.

-Raihan: His personality. Raihan is a lot of fun to hang out with. He and Nessa have similar personalities, so they get along well.

-Leon: The way he looks out for the rest of the league. Leon is the reason Rose never got the chance to pass a rule to stop the Gym Leaders from doing outside work. Leon protected Nessa’s modeling career, despite all the trouble it put him through.

Kabu:

-Milo: His commitment. Milo always follows through on promises and agreements. Kabu really appreciates that.

-Nessa: Nessa’s work ethic. Nessa puts in a lot of work to do all the things she wants to do. Kabu knows that not everyone would be able to do that.

-Bea: How hard she works. Bea is always training. Kabu always admires those who work hard to get stronger.

-Allister: How advanced he is. Allister is the youngest gym leader Galar has ever seen. Kabu is very impressed.

-Opal: Her attitude. She’s always sarcastic and sassy, and Kabu thinks it’s funny.

-Gordie: The way he looks after Piers. Kabu has known Gordie since he was very young, and he knows that Piers is his best friend. Gordie has always been there to support Piers when he needs it, and it reminds Kabu of his friendship with Melony.

-Melony: She’s a good friend. Kabu and Melony have been best friends for a very long time. And despite how long it’s been, Melony and Kabu are still as close as ever.

-Piers: How hard he works. Not everyone sees it, but Piers puts everything he has into taking care of Spikemuth and following his own ambitions.

-Raihan: His passion. Kabu relates to and admires Raihan’s commitment to becoming stronger than Leon.

-Leon: His strength. Leon is so strong it’s unreal, and yet he’s still very humble. It’s a source of inspiration.

Bea:

-Milo: His physical strength. Bea loves to spar, and Milo is a formidable match.

-Nessa: Her involvement. Nessa is always seen doing something for her community. Bea teaches martial arts, so seeing Nessa teaching swimming is something they bond over.

-Kabu: His desire to better himself. Kabu and Bea train together relatively often.

-Allister: His childishness. No one knows Allister as well as Bea, and it’s refreshing to see him act like a kid.

-Opal: Her stories. Opal was very strong and chaotic when she was younger. Bea loves to hear about it.

-Gordie: His type specialty. Bea loves to train her pokemon against Gordie’s because of how tough they are.

-Melony: Her kindness. Melony is very strong, but she’s also very kind and generous. Bea always loves seeing her fellow female gym leaders proving their strength.

-Piers: His advocacy for his pokemon. Bea knows that Dark Type pokemon have a huge stigma, and she appreciates that Piers works to change that.

-Raihan: His drive. He’s great to train with because he wants to get stronger so badly.

-Leon: His generosity. Bea would understand if Leon refused to help the gym leaders so he could stay stronger, but Leon is always happy to help the gym leaders train.

Allister:

-Milo: His food. Milo always has something tasty to share with Allister.

-Nessa: How nice she is. Nessa is always thoughtful and kind to Allister. She laughs at all his jokes, so it makes him feel confident.

-Kabu: His stories from Hoenn. Kabu visits Hoenn pretty often and brings snacks and other things back for Allister. And his stories are interesting.

-Bea: Her care. Bea is usually seen as strong and cold, but Allister knows that she takes care of him. He thinks of her as an older sister.

-Opal: Visiting her. Visiting Opal is very nice. The visits are always peaceful and quiet. Opal gives him good snacks, and she seems to understand him.

-Gordie: His gifts. Gordie loves to give material gifts for any occasion he can. Gordie is a really good gift giver, too. Allister doesn’t know Gordie well enough to think of something better.

-Melony: How she takes care of him. Melony is very understanding and accommodating for Allister. She also takes care of Bea, which makes Allister feel better.

-Piers: He accommodates for Allister. Allister used to think Piers was loud and scary, but he’s actually really calm and quiet. Piers is able to take Allister somewhere quiet and keep people away when he’s overwhelmed.

-Raihan: His love of books. Allister likes to read, and Raihan is a good person to talk to about books. Raihan also lends Allister really good books.

-Leon: His understanding. Leon is very loud and energetic. He knows he’s a lot for Allister. He just really appreciates that Leon doesn’t get offended when Allister gets too overwhelmed.

Opal:

-Milo: His connection to nature. Milo gets plants, and bonds with Opal over the forests around Ballonlea.

-Nessa: Her advocacy for strong women. Opal grew up in a really sexist time. She really appreciates Nessa encouraging girls to be strong.

-Kabu: His humor. Opal thinks Kabu’s humor is hilarious. She gets along will with him and Melony.

-Bea: Her care for Allister. Opal thinks it’s fascinating that Bea cares so gently for Allister while she’s still so stoic and strong.

-Allister: His mystery. Opal relates to him more than anyone else. How different he is from others is endearing.

-Gordie: His kindness. Gordie is really supportive and kind to everyone, especially his friends. Gordie takes a lot of time to make sure his friends are okay.

-Melony: Her stories. Opal likes to tell stories, but she loves to hear about when Melony was young and wild.

-Piers: His resilience. Opal can tell that Piers is a survivor. He adapts to everything and has achieved success despite everything he’s been through.

-Raihan: His history knowledge. Raihan likes to ask questions about events that Opal lived through and Opal likes to share those stories with him.

-Leon: His care for Hop. Opal’s favorite side of Leon is the caring brother side. She knows how happy it makes Hop when Leon is with him. It’s heartwarming.

Gordie:

-Milo: His humor. Gordie likes to crack jokes with Milo because they always seem to land.

-Nessa: Her attitude. To Gordie, nothing is funnier than watching Nessa put someone down for being a jerk.

-Kabu: His involvement. Kabu is a close friend of his mother, so Gordie saw him a lot when he was a child. Kabu is like a father figure to Gordie in a way.

-Bea: Her eagerness to fight. Gordie loves pokemon battles against her because she understands rock types really well.

-Allister: His ambition. Gordie knows that Allister has goals for his future, and he can admire that.

-Opal: Her gossip. Gordie gets to hear juicy secrets, either from Opal herself or from Melony, who heard it from the source herself.

-Melony: Her love. No matter how much they fight, Gordie knows Melony was a good mother to him. He can’t hate her ever.

-Piers: His supportiveness. Piers has been Gordie’s best friend since they were children. Piers puts his entire self into being a good friend and helping Gordie. Piers has done a lot for Gordie, especially with the fight going on.

-Raihan: His energy. It’s tough to keep up with Raihan, but it’s an adrenaline rush to hang out because of how much always seems to happen.

-Leon: His involvement with the rest of the league. Leon could be some greater presence, but he isn’t. He’s a friend to the gym leaders, and stands up for them when they need. Gordie really appreciates it.

Melony:

-Milo: The way he takes care of his Pokémon. His flock of Wooloo are well loved and it shows.

-Nessa: Her unwavering determination. Melony admires the way Nessa sticks to her choices and hardly ever budges for other people.

-Kabu: His sense of adventure. Especially when he was younger, Kabu would take Melony on plenty of exciting adventures. Even now that they’re older, her best friend is still a lot of fun.

-Bea: Her care for Allister. Melony is one of the few who knows how kind Bea is to Allister. All they have is each other in essence. And Melony is glad Allister has a solid person to stick to.

-Allister: His childlike curiosity. Melony adores kids, and Allister is no exception. She loves that he asks so many questions and it always learning.

-Opal: Her wisdom. Melony is hardly ever caught off guard or at a loss, but when she is, Opal always knows what to say.

-Gordie: His independence. Even though Melony doesn’t like that Gordie doesn’t train Ice Types, she has to admit that he does well for himself. He’s a big presence without riding the traditions of his family, and he built that himself.

-Piers: The way he cares for Marnie. Melony has known Piers and Marnie since they were kids. Melony is grateful that Piers is such a good caretaker for Marnie, even though the fact that they’re in this position breaks her heart.

-Raihan: His generosity. Raihan is very famous and rich, so he’s always donating things or giving to the people around him. Melony thinks that’s a good attitude for someone like Raihan.

-Leon: His humbleness. Melony remembered when Leon first became champion. He’d been a little arrogant at the time, but he’s humbled himself a lot. She’s glad for it.

Piers:

-Milo: His open mindedness. Piers knows Milo was afraid of him at first, so he was surprised when Milo tried to get to know him. He’s glad for it.

-Nessa: Her confidence. Nessa never lets hurtful comments get her down. That’s something Piers admires and is a little jealous of.

-Kabu: His patience. Kabu and Piers aren’t the closest, but Kabu was there for Piers when he needed him. Piers had been a lot of trouble for Kabu to deal with then, but Kabu never lost his temper with him and was patient the whole time.

-Bea: Her relationship with Allister. Piers know what it’s like to be a kid responsible for an even younger kid. Bea’s not exactly in the same situation he was in, but he still admires her resilience.

-Allister: That he’s introverted. Piers relates to Allister not wanting to be around people. Allister also gives Piers and excuse to get to a quieter place to rest in big events.

-Opal: Her ability to read people. That skill has saved Opal and the people around her a few times. Piers included.

-Gordie: His consistency. Gordie has always been a safe haven for Piers. He’s always been sturdy and supportive and hardly ever wavers when Piers needs him.

-Melony: Her care. Melony is the closest thing to a mom Piers has ever had. He doesn’t know where he’d be if she didn’t insist on taking care of him any way she could.

-Raihan: The fact that he’s extroverted. Raihan can be a chore to deal with sometimes, but Piers also appreciates him because he takes the lead. It’s refreshing to just be dragged around and not have to make any decisions.

-Leon: His understanding. Leon has always been someone who wants to understand and accommodate people. He’s saved Piers’ hide many times because he made the attempt to understand Piers.

Raihan:

-Milo: His laid back view of training. Milo is a strong trainer, but he’s friendly about it. Milo makes for a good relaxing warm up or wind down battle.

-Nessa: Her attitude. Raihan and Nessa are a force to be reckoned with when they’re together. Nessa makes Raihan feel even stronger.

-Kabu: His passion. Kabu is an intense trainer because he wants to better himself. This is a trait they both share.

-Bea: Her intensity. Raihan loves training with her because it’s so difficult to keep up. Certainly, a welcome challenge.

-Allister: His mystery. Understanding Allister the way Raihan does makes him feel exclusive. Also, they talk about books a lot, and that’s fun.

-Opal: Her gossiping. Raihan loves to be in the know, and he’s glad Opal is willing to share with him.

-Gordie: Hanging out with him. Gordie is a fun person to hang out with casually. He always seems to know someone or have something to do.

-Melony: Her cooking. Raihan is a sucker for home cooked meals made with love. When he’s in the area, he always wants to stop by for dinner.

-Piers: His reliability. Piers puts up with a lot, but he always follows through on his promises. He may not seem like it at first, but Piers is a very trustworthy person.

-Leon: His strength. Raihan always looks up to Leon. He worries that if he ever does surpass him, he’ll be without a goal and start to decline.

Leon:

-Milo: His love of kids. Milo is an old friend of Leon’s, since they used to live so close together. Milo was always there to help out with Hop when Leon needed, and he taught Hop a lot of important things.

-Nessa: Her dedication. Leon knows she models and trains Pokémon at the same time. She works hard to do her best with both.

-Kabu: His want to be better. Kabu is always working hard, and it pays off. Leon cares a lot about people who want to be stronger.

-Bea: Her training. Bea throws everything into being a Pokémon trainer, and Leon looks up to her for that.

-Allister: He’s a prodigy. Allister is the youngest gym leader Galar has ever seen. He’s also very strong at the same time. Leon has high hopes for his future.

-Opal: Her experience. When Leon has a problem, Opal always knows how to help. She’s gotten him through a lot.

-Gordie: He’s fun. Whenever Leon needs to go out casually, Gordie knows how to help. Hanging out with Gordie is a good stress reliever.

-Melony: She cares about him and Hop. Melony is very sweet, and Leon knows that she took care of him when he was first settling into the league. He was very grateful, but not surprised, to know that she did the same for Hop later on.

-Piers: His dedication. Piers juggles a lot of things. Being a gym leader, his music, taking care of Marnie and Spikemuth. It’s a lot for one person, but Piers perseveres. Leon doesn’t know if he’d be able to handle all that.

-Raihan: His rivalry. Raihan is always at Leon’s heels. He inspires Leon to keep working hard for himself and the people around him. He knows how important he is for Raihan, too.

I tried to do my best but for some reason it took me three days to get through this.

#pokemon swsh #pokemon milo #pokemon nessa #pokemon kabu #pokemon bea #pokemon allister #pokemon opal #pokemon gordie #pokemon melony #pokemon piers #pokemon raihan #pokemon leon #ask #bigwagonpiepainter

[real-work-of-art]

Bitter

A/N: After months of absolutely zero motivation to write, a little spark appeared! Inspired by the song Bitter by Fletcher.

It kind of ends abruptly so let me know if you’d like to see a part two.

Thank you for reading!

Word count: <1k. Warnings: angst, mature language

Rage coursed through your veins as you swiped through the pictures on his recent Instagram post. Picture after picture of dazzling smiles and dizzying gazes that to any normal person screamed that these two were in love. But you knew better. You knew him better. He was dangling her right in front of your face. This wasn’t love. It was cruel bitterness.

You were lucky to call Harry your best friend for over eight years. Now you just referred to him as an asshole. You’d seen him date many people on and off over the years, and it was always the same game with him. So when the two of you made a drunken mistake, high off the adrenaline from his successful night, you thought you knew how the events would unfold. You would sleep together, he would go MIA for a couple of weeks, and then show up out of the blue for another go-round. But when you woke up that morning to him cooking you breakfast and making day plans for the two of you, your entire world went sideways, before crashing down and exploding.

Laying out Harry’s typical M.O. for him went poorer than you thought. Instead of handling it like an adult he threw a tantrum spewing out every friends to lovers cliche. He stormed out of your house that day and left every one of your calls and texts unanswered.

So this was his way of getting back at you it seemed. Showing you what could have been if you hadn’t ruined it. Frolicking on beaches while drowning in champagne and each other’s joy.

“Whatever I don’t need that,” you thought to yourself as you threw your phone at the couch cushion and made your way into your kitchen.

“I bet she thinks she’s found herself a real winner,” you mumbled to yourself as you tried to fix yourself a sandwich, struggling with the tie on the bag of bread.

You slammed your hands down on your counter— too angry to continue with your pathetic attempt at a distraction. Your body moved quicker than your brain could even process. You swiped your jacket off the back of the couch after snatching your phone and stuffing it in your jeans pocket. You slammed your door behind you and stomped out to your car. Adrenaline and furry pumping through your body. You sped the entire way, not a single concern for your reckless driving in mind. Only thoughts of hate for him and his stupid face flowed through your brain.

You pulled up to his gate and punched in the numbers that let you in. You slammed your car into park and watched as his front door cracked open. You knew he must have received the notification on his phone that someone was there but you didn’t let that phase you. You pounded your feet into every step with the meanest scowl written across your face.

“What the hell,” he began to ask but you didn’t let him finish. You crashed into him with a passionate kiss. His initial shock and confusion only lasted a few seconds before he wrapped his arms around your waist and returned your kiss with matched intensity.

You pulled away first, quickly pulling air into your lungs and exhaling a breathless “fuck you” as he walked you backwards through the threshold of his front door.

#harry styles writing #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x reader #harry styles blurb #I wrote this in like 40 minutes and said fuck it hit post

[romanticchemacademic]

Dear future health professionals and stem professors,

We need a revolution of thought. Only through a renaissance of pure and genuine passion towards medicine and other sciences will we have competent doctors, nurses, other healthcare workers, and teachers. We live in a world where people pursue noble professions for the sake of social and economic advancement. However, we lack individuals who love the process of learning and their career.

I recollect quite a marvelous excerpt written by one of the world’s greatest scientific minds, Albert Einstein. In his book, The World As I see It he writes:

ACADEMIC CHAIRS ARE MANY, but wise and noble teachers are few; lecture rooms are numerous and large, but the number of young people who genuinely thirst for truth and justice is small. Nature scatters her common wares with a lavish hand, but the choice sort she produces but seldom.

We all know that, so why complain? Was it not ever thus and will it not ever thus remain? Certainly, and one must take what nature gives as one finds it. But there is also such a thing as a spirit of the times, an attitude of mind characteristic of a particular generation, which is passed on from individual to individual and gives a society its particular tone. Each of us has to do his little bit towards transforming this spirit of the times.

Compare the spirit which animated the youth in our universities a hundred years ago with that prevailing today. They had faith in the amelioration of human society, respect for every honest opinion, the tolerance for which our classics had lived and fought. 

  I believe that one of the faults lies within education institutions. Educators rely on testing, textbooks, and detached memorized lectures. Lectures lack passion and another essential factor: the real practice. The theory is important but the practice is necessary to understand the theory. But without passion, nobody will learn to love the material being taught. Ibn Sina is known for being one of the greatest physicians and teachers of Islamic medicine. I am not completely sure whether what I am about to mention is true. But I read that when he lectured theory to the medical students at the Madrassa (University) he would show them how it worked. Besides medical history and theory. He also taught physics, astronomy, philosophy, and mathematics. However, he is also famed for being an excellent teacher duly because he would take his students to test out the theories and practice what they have been taught. If they were learning medical theory, they were taken to the hospital to observe patients and their cases. If they were learning astronomy, they would all gather in the evening to look up at the heavens to look at the constellations. Lastly, his passion for his vocation was the final touch. Educators without the drive cannot teach. Learning is about understanding oneself, others, and the world. Learning evolves our minds and our spirits by making us get in harmony with the universe. I believe this ties in with Aristotle’s famous saying, “The unexamined life is not worth living”. Though my interpretation may be a wee bit off, I translate it as thus; we can gather all textbook knowledge as possible but if we do not put into practice the knowledge learned, what is the point? I yearn and I pine to experience all that I have learned. I want to see why the theory makes sense in reality. I want to conduct experiments. So much potential is being wasted. Biology is the study of life. However, when I took the course, it was so cold to a point that it did not even feel like I was studying the human body but something alien instead. There is also such a rush to memorize material within a couple of weeks because of exams that the material ceases to be interesting and becomes more of an arduous chore instead. Our sense of time-shifted completely after the industrial revolution. Perhaps this is a reason why we feel the need to rush through everything and not take our time to study profoundly. 

We need another Scientific Revolution, curious minds thirsting for the acquisition of knowledge and unanswered questions. However, I believe that the leading force behind this is a necessity. I would like to mention an example to illustrate what I mean from a novel I read a while ago called, The Physician by Noah Gordon. A boy from Medieval Europe lost his mother from an unknown disease leaving him orphaned. He then grew up with the necessity to learn what the disease was and how to prevent other similar deaths, so that others do not suffer what he has suffered. He then worked with Barbers (people who performed medical procedures in Medieval Europe). But the medical knowledge these professionals had was not enough to answer his question. Thus, he traveled to Persia where there was a quite renowned and exclusive medical school. He did not have the economic means or previous schooling to attend but he impressed the headmaster with his passion and knowledge. Thus, the headmaster admitted him into the Madrassa. The European boy then invested all his time doing research, dissections and treating patients until he finally found out what ailment caused his mother’s death, side sickness (appendicitis). He figured out a way to treat this illness, removal of the appendix. From his initial necessity which was the driving force for him to pursue a medical career, he became a famous physician and felt that all his suffering and odyssey were worthwhile. The sense of necessity leads to the feeling of passion. It was his love for his mother that made him follow such a journey full of obstacles. I am beginning to apply that to my own life. I want to figure out my necessity which will be the driving force to power through university and medical school without ever feeling burnt out. I want to feel fulfilled. I believe this is what all pre-medical students and teachers should think about. What is your necessity? We are going to be dealing with human life, someone’s mother, father, friend, sister, uncle, lover, husband, or child...It is not something to be taken lightly. I know so many doctors lacking empathy because they went into the medical field with just the intention of being acknowledged as “Doctors” and getting rich. But I feel that even the most apathetic healthcare workers can become great empathetic professionals the moment they realize that something was triggered deep inside them, perhaps a loved one having an unknown disease. This would lead the apathetic doctor to do mass amounts of research to try to find a cure. This feeling becomes a necessity. A necessity to not lose the loved one. A necessity to save lives. Thus, finding passion, purpose, and becoming a better person. Though each person is different, we all share a selfish feeling. Most of the time we do not truly care about other peoples’ suffering until it happens to us. Once we are affected by something, we drive all our time and attention to find a solution or a way to deal with a problem. We become consumed and completely obsessed by it. I regard this as passion. I do not think passion subsides, it lingers on inside us. It is a fire that never burns out. I remember my high school teacher writing in my yearbook:

Remember a few things, BE PATIENT. You are eager and you will accomplish so much. But take your time, you are always rushing. Life is a journey, it is not about the destination. Be picky. You love everything with enthusiasm but enthusiasm can burn out. Find a fire inside yourself that burns for a long time.

-V

We cannot rush our personal legend. I believe it comes to us. It is Maktub (it’s written). But we also have to do something. Imagine you are on a stranded island but you have a machete, a fishing rod, coconuts, a cave for shelter, wood for a fire, an ocean full of fish. Everything required for survival is there, but you simply have to cut open the coconut with the machete, go fishing for food, fire to cook, and warmth. The fish isn’t going to swim right into your hands and the fire will not light itself. We must use our resources and do our bit. The Universe has a lot going on, we must help out a bit.

If you ever think about quitting, try to remember what made you start your odyssey in the first place. I do not know what my necessity is yet but that is okay. I believe it will come to me eventually. So for now, I simply love to romanticize academia. I like to imagine the: earthy tones of the universities archways, cobblestone paths, laboratories with clean Erlenmeyer flasks, beakers, pristine white lab coats, bunsen burner flames changing colors as different salts are added, Bromothymol Blue pen stains, elegant calculations inside a worn leather-bound notebook, formulas scrawled over the blackboard, forgotten cold Irish breakfast tea on the desk, academics discussing theories, applause from a successful experiment, gray rainy days spent inside the lab, Whitman, Hemingway, et Sir Arthur Conon Doyle being read during break, intellectual conversations with professors, chemistry reports being written, molecular models built, volumes of ancient words, fire slowly burning in the stone fireplace, trying to understand, looking at the constellations on a clear night in the astronomy tower, reciting poetry, Tchaikovsky playing whilst completing a long lab report on Lê Chatelier’s theory of Equilibrium, curious minds, sleepless evenings in the library, beautiful anatomical illustrations...Just imagining these things motivate and inspire me to continue my path. Though it may seem superficial, it awakens something inside me. I yearn and I pine to become a Chemistry Romantic. 

I want to conclude this letter by saying that pupils and educators keep ideals alive and can change them accordingly as well. We have the power to become excellent professionals or simply exist and do nothing for the human race. But if you plan on becoming a physician or educator, you must find the trigger which brings your passion to life, your necessity. Once you find that, you are guaranteed greatness and fulfillment. However, do not rush. Perfection takes time. A couple of obstacles should not hinder you from persevering. Many will tell you to give up but do not. That is the Universe testing you. Do your best until you master the topic. Once you know better, you are then able to do better. 

Regards,

Confessions from a Chemistry Academic

#stem dark academia #dark academia #academia #stem #philosophy #academic universitylife #unilife #chemistry #medicine

[fandom-strumpet]

Blue Eyes

This fic was inspired by the song Emerald Eyes by Anson Seabra

Word Count: 1,527

It was a boring Saturday, you were in between bad guys and the rest was unusual but welcome. The Salvatore house was the ideal place to relax and hang out, it was much more spacious and some how more like home than your actual home. You had been listening to music through your earbuds on the couch, bouncing your foot to the beat. Kai sat across the living room, diving into one of the old books from Stefan's collection on the wall. After listening to Emerald Eyes you decided exactly what you wanted to do that night. Putting your earbuds away, you cross over to Kai and drum a little pattern on his knees. "Hey, Parker. I want to show you something cool tonight." Putting his book down slightly he looked up with a curious smile, his blue eyes gleaming in the sun beam streaming from the tall window. "What is it?" "I want to show you the state park, we'll have a picnic up in my favorite spot and look at the stars." You flashed him a cheesy smile and wiggled your eyebrows. Ugh, I am so bad at this flirting thing. "Sounds fun. It's about damn time we got out of the house. I'll get the picnic basket ready." Half an hour later and you were both packed up and ready to head out. Kai pulled his favorite blue car up to the front so you could both hop in. With a creak and a thud, you closed the passenger door and slid in close enough to where you could rest your head on his shoulder if you wanted.  "Which way is the state park?" Kai asked, putting the car in gear as you started to roll onward. "Just follow the highway and you'll go straight to it." you tried to give a confident smile but you felt so nervous inside. Tonight is the night. The car ride was a blast, you found the rock and roll station and Kai turned the volume up. With windows rolled down, your hair blew wildly as the both of you sang along to the blaring music. Rolling hills turned into pine tree covered mountains, rocky cliffs started to appear here and there. The fresh forest air filled the cabin and you knew you were close to the entrance. “Right there.” you motioned and Kai slowed down to turn into the park. You turned the music down to hear him ask,“Which way now?” “Go left, the scenic view starts there.” you squirmed playfully, excited for the nights events about to unfold. Kai responded in turn by bumping his elbow against you with a smirk. The drive on the scenic view was surreal, not much needed to be said as you stared out the windows in wonder of nature’s artwork. Wildflowers were scattered here and there, the tall trees making a scene just for the two of you, showing off the fluttering leaves and the sound of the birds chirping away. About 10 minutes into the drive you reached the top of the mountains. There were wide, open spacious views of the surrounding mountains and hills. A green valley spread below while to the right it turned into a beautiful rocky canyon. Kai pulled the car to a stop in the mini parking space by the covered picnic area. He reached back to pull out the large picnic basket which looked to be filled to the brim with food. “Is here good?” Kai motioned to one of the large picnic tables. “Nope!” you shouted, still getting the blankets out of the backseat, “Go out to the big grassy area and find us a nice spot!” You bit your lip in excitement and Kai walked around in the grass trying to find just the right spot. He wanted this night to be perfect. He had never really gone on trips with just Y/N before and it was exciting, he was new to emotions but he always felt a different kind when he was with her. There was some emotion that he couldn’t describe, he tried to talk to Damon about how his stomach did flips like he was going to puke, his heart raced and he felt warm, he wanted to know what it meant but Damon just laughed and walked away. Maybe tonight he would find out. At last he found the perfect spot and just in time as Y/N came over with the thick blanket to lay down. “Mmmmmm I’m hungry! What did you pack?” your hand bumped into Kai’s as you both tried to open the basket.

 “Ha..Let me get it out.” Kai winked at you. 

You playfully rolled your eyes, used to Kai’s pretentious flirting. Did his cheeks turn pink? No. No way, you’re just imagining. You scoot back, giving him room to spread out the assortment of food he had packed.

“Damn- I didn’t know you could fit that much food in there. This looks amazing!” 

Kai gave you a proud smile, “I’ve had time to practice my cooking.” 

Digging into the food, your stomach had a taste of heaven. Kai closed his eyes and enjoyed the warmth of the sun on his skin. You allowed your eyes to wander over him as he sat back on his arms peacefully. He opened his eyes and you cleared your throat, looking away quickly to avoid his suspicion. Once you were both full, Kai packed up the basket and set it off to the side. The sun had almost finished setting, the orange, pink and purple streaks quickly fading. Kai and you both laid down onto your backs with a content sigh. A chill started to kick in as the temperature dropped and out of instinct you both moved closer together. Kai’s put his arms up above his head to relax, for some reason it was so attractive even though he didn’t mean for it to be. His muscles flexed through his shirts created butterflies in your stomach. You could only imagine what it would feel like to be held in his arms. Kai looked up to the night sky, he couldn’t help himself from looking over at you. The way you gazed up in wonder, and how your eyes sparkled from the reflection of the stars. Humming, he allowed one of his arms to droop around your shoulder. You pretended not to notice, not wanting to make a bigger deal out of it than you should. Your heart said otherwise. 

“Look. Look right there at the colors changing!” you pointed, trying to show Kai the discovery you had made. 

“I don’t see what you’re pointing to.” he furrowed his eyebrows. 

You moved in closer trying again but he hummed a no in response. You made a risky decision but decided it would be worth it. You rolled on top of him, his chest pressed flush against your back and you held one if his arms against your stomach while pointing up to the sky with your other hand.

 “Look,” you giggled, “do you see it now?” You leaned your head back so you could look at  him. 

“I see it- what is it?”

“I have no idea- but it’s beautiful.” you leaned your cheek against his to look back up. 

Your smell was intoxicating to him, the rose aroma flooding his senses until all he could think about was you on top of him. He loved the feel of your body rising and falling against him.

 Kai breathed into your ear, “Just like you.” 

Your breath hitched, unsure if you really heard what you thought you did. Suddenly Kai’s hands moved to your waist to turn you over. He moved one hand to the middle of your back and drew lazy circles. The light breeze floated her hair into a halo, his breath caught at the sight and he moved his fingers through your hair. You loved the feel of his hand against you and felt a slight chill when the cold from his rings made contact with your bare skin. Even with the temperatures dropping, you didn’t feel the cold. You decided this was the moment. 

“I love you.” you said softly, looking at the man who was your all and everything.

“You- love me?” his hand froze on your back and he rubbed your cheek with his thumb.

“More than life itself.” you responded without hesitating.

“I- um- sorry, I get nervous around such a pretty girl. You make my heart race, and the smell of you absolutely drives me wild.”

You looked down and blushed. Kai gently brought his fingers beneath your chin and lifted your eyes to meet his. “I love you too.” 

Mind racing, his hand slid down to your throat. The cold of his silver rings gave you goosebumps and just like that- he pulled you towards him, lips colliding into a sweet and tender kiss. A kiss of passion that starry-eyed dreamers wait their whole lives for. The kiss between two people who have at long last found their soul mate. Time stood still, the universe paused to watch the epic moment of the beginning of a love story like no other. 

@rome5683​ @1-800-khaleesii

#kai parker #kai parker fanfiction #kai parker imagine #kai parker x reader #emerald eyes

[babyjamiebarnes]

Build-A-Bear

Part Ten

Featuring: Bucky x Stark!reader, dad!Tony, Peter Parker, Steve, Sam

Warnings: mentions of smut (bondage, anal play, breeding kink, slight voyeurism), language, mentions of arson

Summary: Now that reader is stuck back at her apartment, she can finally feel safe again — until that safety is completely compromised. And more than her physical safety is put on the line.

Author’s Note: I’m so fucking stoked for this chapter!!! This is when it starts to get wild!! I hope you all like it! If you even read this, you should let me know who you think the person in question is (you’ll know what I mean when you read it lol). And as always, feel free to buy me a coffee if you want!

Tags: @amourmarvel @fangirlvoice @kennedywxlsh @devilswaldorf @what-the-hap-is-fuckning @alyispunk @fredweasleysbitchh @wearegroot @sunflowerbebe107 @prestigious-tea @brckenmemories @angelbabymed

Series Masterlist

Spending the next two weeks sequestered in your apartment wasn’t terrible, but it just cemented your assumption that you couldn’t even pretend to be normal anymore. At least when you were at the Tower, you felt like another face in the crowd compared to the Avengers.

Accommodating your work from home setup wasn’t easy, but you all made it work. Peter worked with you when he was back for a weekend. He even helped you go through more of your fan mail, if you could even call it that. There were some parcels that were genuine fan mail, people wishing you well and young girls saying you inspired them to pursue STEM careers; there were some death threats that you had to send to local law enforcement to investigate; there were mostly creepy letters from men you could only assume were older than your father. One man wrote that he wanted to find out if you smelled as beautiful as you looked. Cringe. Another wrote about how he wanted to suck on your toes until they were wrinkly. Gag. The worst was a man who said he wanted to be sandwiched between you and your dad. Barf.

Steve and Sam used the scanner your dad made to check all your mail before it was even brought upstairs. None had been poisoned or set to explode, but some contained explicit items that you were more than happy to not see.

It was still slightly traumatizing when Steve waltzed in with a package in his arms and said, “Hey [Y/N], I didn’t toss this one because it doesn’t look like it’s from a person. Did you order something from… Romantix?”

You paused mid-chew as you, Bucky, and Sam all sat in your living room enjoying a nice Saturday lunch. Bucky wasn’t fazed, continuing to eat his food; Sam, however, busted out laughing.

“What’s in it, Steve?” Sam asked loudly, clearly trying to rile you up.

“Uh, all the scanner showed was a couple small golf balls -- I think -- and what looked like a top? And a remote.”

Sam kept giggling to himself, Bucky and Steve both looked confused as hell. You moved to grab the box from Steve but Sam beat you to it, tutting at you as you reached for it again.

“Uh-uh. We should open it to make sure everything is safe,” Sam teased.

“Everything in there is safe, I promise,” you swore. When you tried to steal the package back, Sam yoinked it further from your grasp with a devious smile. Your cheeks were burning hot at the thought of the inevitable. Sam was going to open your box, Steve was going to turn red as a tomato, and Bucky was… well, hopefully he was going to take you to your room for the rest of the day.

And before you could try to snatch the box away again, Sam ripped the packing tape off and pulled out the first item: kegel balls.

“What are those?” Steve asked.

“Don’t worry about it!” you shouted, grabbing the vacuum-packed, heavy silver balls from a still giggling Sam. He reached back into the box and you realized you may just have to suck it up and let him have his show-and-tell.

“Here’s that ‘top’ you were talking about,” Sam joked. And in his hands sat… the butt plug.

“Sam, stop! Literally no one here needs to see this except me and Bucky,” you whined.

“In that case, I’m curious. What else is in there?” Bucky asked, leaning forward to peek inside.

“Bucky! You’re supposed to be on my side!”

Sam shrugged and handed the box to Bucky so he could rummage through it instead. You couldn’t really complain as much now that your boyfriend was doing the snooping instead.

“What the -- oh,” Bucky said as he lifted the next item: a remote… tied to a pair of thin black panties.

“Why would those come together?” Steve asked. You weren’t sure if he was serious or not because he may have been born in the early 1900s, but he would’ve had to have checked out modern porn and kinks by now, right?

“Do you want to tell him or should I?” Sam asked with raised eyebrows. His lips were quirked in an annoying smirk. Bucky sat with a similar expression; at least you knew he had brushed up on modern sex.

“They’re vibrating panties,” you deadpanned. Steve fortunately didn’t look too surprised, he just raised his eyebrows and nodded.

“What’s next, Buck?” Sam prompted him to continue unpacking.

“Oh -- oh -- oh yeah. We can have some fun with this,” Bucky laughed as he lifted up the collar and ball gag.

“Damn, [Y/N]. You’re a freaky freak,” Sam laughed. Bucky didn’t even deny this; he just laughed with his friend before continuing with the last items.

“And…” Bucky started to explain. He quickly cut himself off when he saw what was in his hands -- and covering the bottom of the package. Dozens of pieces of lingerie, from skimpy little lace pieces to a loose-fitting satin teddy to a sheer black robe. “Oh, that’s for my eyes only,” he finally said.

Sam and Steve grumbled in response but didn’t push it. They probably realized getting a full reveal of the shit you and Bucky wanted to mess around with was more than they would’ve gotten if you had your way.

And just as you hoped, Bucky took you to your bedroom for a few hours. You found out you didn’t love the plug and the ball gag made you drool, but the collar had a little leash Bucky was able to pull on while hitting it from the back... you liked that one.

From that day on, you made sure to tell the boys when you’d have a package coming in. Bucky definitely perked up at the mention of more mail like that coming his way.

•

Two weeks after the Romantix debacle, Peter was back in town and stoked to help you go through mail again. He didn’t like all the creepy letters, but he was really good at making you laugh at them instead of constantly cringing and gagging. Bucky and Steve even sat to help, but Sam said if he was going to keep cooking for everyone, he didn’t have to sort through mail. And none of you wanted to pass up on his classic New Orleans recipes.

You all sat around your dining room table with your small dining TV playing old episodes of “Criminal Minds” as background noise. The amount of mail you received definitely dropped with time, but you’d still have a hefty pile at the end of the week. The creepy letters were shredded but you liked responding to the nicer letters, so there was a “shred” pile and a “respond” pile on either side of the “open next” pile.

You were all working in near-silence aside from the quiet dialogue on the TV and the occasional clink of pans from Sam in the kitchen. With four of you working, you’d be able to read through everything in about half an hour. As you neared the bottom of the pile, you grabbed a large manilla envelope and felt the weight of whatever was inside. It couldn’t have been dangerous because the boys scanned everything, but you carefully tugged it open nonetheless. You held it upside down and gently shook out the contents: a letter, a smaller envelope, and a DVD. A few people sent mix CDs or fan videos on DVDs and flash drives, so you were initially excited about this one… until you started reading the letter. The choppy typewriter print quickly turned muddled as your blood froze in your veins.

My darling [Y/N],

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? No, I don’t think I shall. I’ll cut to the chase instead: I’m the reason the world knows who you are. Guess I’m a little loose-lipped. Oops! But I needed you to know I’m serious somehow. Or else you wouldn’t see this as a true threat.

I know your little secret. I’ve seen more than I originally planned, but you gave me plenty to work with in my free time. You look beautiful while you sleep; you look even more beautiful in the throes of passion. But I’m not looking to have your body.

Unless you get $2,000,000 to your little doorman Matthew to bring to me by the end of the week, the enclosed pictures will make their way to the desk of daddy dearest. And we both know he won’t appreciate seeing who is penetrating his daughter.

And if that $2,000,000 doesn’t find me by the end of next week, the video on the DVD will be released to the world.

I look forward to our next interaction.

Your hands shook as you tore open the envelope to see what pictures this person allegedly had of you. At first, they were just creepy candids of you walking down the street, nothing the paps wouldn’t have. Then they turned into photos of Bucky escorting you through crowds… and then photos of you in your apartment.

You were sleeping in your bed in one. Then standing in your kitchen making breakfast in one of Bucky’s shirts. And then a shirtless Bucky was cradling your face and kissing your forehead.

The next picture was of Bucky standing behind you in the kitchen. His pajama bottoms — the pair you got him for his birthday — were pooled at his feet. One hand was pressing you to the counter, the other was hoisting your leg up to the granite as he drove into you.

“Oh my god,” you whispered, unable to speak. As you frantically flipped through the rest of the photos, your eyes flooded with tears and your breathing grew more erratic, grabbing Bucky’s attention, then Peter’s, then Steve’s.

But their concern meant nothing to you as you processed the images before you.

You on your knees with Bucky’s dick clearly between your lips. Bucky on his knees with his face pressed between your thighs. Your legs wrapped around Bucky’s torso as he moved you on his cock. Bucky’s hand wrapped around your throat as you rode him on the couch.

All the images looked like they were taken through your windows, like someone was somehow standing outside your apartment despite being stories above the ground.

“What’s wrong, doll?” Bucky asked softly. He gently touched your arm, drawing your view from the distressing imagery to his attempted comfort, though it unfortunately did nothing to calm you down. Not this time.

You looked up at him with tear-filled eyes but couldn’t bring yourself to speak. All you could do was shake your head and push the letter to him. You watched his eyes quickly scan the words before reaching for the photos. He didn’t snatch them away from you or even try to take them. He just held his hand out and let you shakily hand them over.

And then you saw the pacific blue of his eyes turn dark and stormy, his jaw clenching as he flipped through the pictures of you — you and him. His breathing grew more and more ragged the more he saw, until he threw the photos to the table with a loud, “Fuck!”

Seconds later, Sam dashed into the room as Steve sifted through the photos. Even Steve grew irritated at the sight. Peter and Sam quickly followed suit, only glimpsing a few pictures before getting the gist of the rest.

The room was silent aside from your quiet sobs. You and Bucky both stared at the disc lying between you until your eyes met. His usually pale blue irises were nearly black.

“I’m scared,” you whimpered. Despite being scared himself — and angry and frustrated and confused — he reached out to pull you into his lap and hold you. Keeping you close always made him feel better, even when it felt like the world was crashing around him.

“Close the curtains,” he demanded gruffly. Steve and Peter immediately jumped up and started pulling all your curtains shut, throwing your usually bright apartment into near darkness.

Bucky held your face between his palms, forcing you to look in his eyes.

“I know you’re scared, but we need to see what’s on that DVD.”

“I can already guess what it is,” you said through your tears.

“Yeah, me too,” Bucky agreed. “But we have to make sure.”

You simply nodded. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to your forehead, helping your breathing slow at the reassuring gesture. He led you into the living room with the DVD in hand. Steve and Sam stood in the living room, Peter sat on the couch. They all looked concerned for you, but tried not to show pity. You could tell they were all upset about this too.

“You can leave the room if you don’t want to see what I’m sure we all know is on this,” Bucky said. His voice was deep and gravelly, almost like his morning voice, but… mean.

You and Bucky sat together on the sofa across from Peter, all eyes trained on the TV as the screen faded from black to a slightly fuzzy shot of your bed. Seconds later, you and Bucky came on screen. And there was audio.

You giggled as Bucky’s body pushed yours to the mattress. “What are you gonna do to me?” your voice sounded.

“I’m gonna put a baby in you,” Bucky’s voice growled. “I’m gonna cum inside this tight pussy until you can’t take it anymore.”

“Jesus,” Sam grumbled. You would’ve laughed if the situation wasn’t so serious.

Bucky only let it play until clothes started coming off. That’s when he knew they actually had a sex tape of you two, especially considering the nearly two-hour time frame on it. Sending explicit pictures of you and Bucky to your dad was one thing, but releasing a non-consensual sex tape of you two was something else entirely.

“What are we gonna do?” Peter asked quietly. Your tears had finally stopped, but the concern in his voice almost sent you over the edge again. He was such a sweet kid and he didn’t deserve to deal with the stress of this with you. But you also knew he was your best friend — practically a brother — and he wasn’t going to let you fend for yourself through this, even with Bucky by your side.

“We have to give them the money,” Sam replied. “We can find out who the door guy gives it to and arrest them or track the bills, but we have to get the money.”

“I don’t have the money,” you confessed. Everyone except Bucky seemed surprised. “I make $200,000 before taxes. Before I got this new role, I made half that. Even if we don’t deduct taxes and the expenses I do pay for, I wouldn’t have even close to two million.”

Everyone went silent again until Steve finally spoke up.

“We need to talk to the doorman.”

•

Bucky stormed out of the elevator, rushing ahead of everyone with murder in his eyes. He gripped the front of Matt’s suit and shoved him against the wall, shaking the letter in his face.

“What the fuck is this?” Bucky was seething.

“What?” Matt squeaked. His eyes were wide as saucers. He was clearly not expecting this confrontation. Bucky just shook the letter again to draw the doorman’s attention.

“Wait. You got one too?” Matt asked. Bucky’s grip loosened as he stared at the shorter man in confusion. You instinctively looked at Peter, who looked just as baffled as you. “I-I got a letter like that. In my locker. This morning.”

“Show us,” you demanded. Bucky released him but Matt’s eyes saw the posse of Avengers behind you (save for Peter, who he probably assumed was either a friend or boyfriend — secret identity and all that) and he rushed all of you to the locker room.

It was a small room since there were only a dozen doormen in your building, if that. He opened his locker and revealed a letter that was nearly identical to yours, but with no mentions of his looks and a much different threat.

“They’re threatening arson?!” you nearly shouted. Bucky and Steve read the letter before handing it to Sam and Peter to check out as well.

“They included pictures of my mom and sister,” Matt explained, clearly scared of what might happen to him and his loved ones. “They know where I live and they know who I live with. I-I would’ve taken this to th-the police but I didn’t want to risk it.”

“They have the later date listed for him,” Sam said. “You had one week to get the money or they’d tell Tony, two weeks or they release the tape. Now we have two weeks to save his family.”

Everyone in the room fell silent once again. Eyes fell on you as Peter quietly repeated his earlier question: “What are we gonna do?”

Despite all eyes on you, you turned to Bucky, who continued to study the letter. His jaw flexed as he thought and if this had been any other time, you would’ve kissed the tension away.

“We’re gonna tell Tony.”

#bucky x reader #bucky x stark!reader #bucky barnes x stark!reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes series #Bucky smut #Bucky x reader smut #Stark!reader

[hanjizung]

𝕂𝕚𝕟𝕜𝕥𝕠𝕓𝕖𝕣  𝕕𝕒𝕪  𝟙𝟚:   𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖.

Felix x Reader.

Word count: 1.5k

♡ Warnings ♡: established relationship, smut, lingerie, fingering.

【ｐｒｅｖｉｏｕｓ　ｄａｙ　||　ｎｅｘｔ　ｄａｙ】

【Ｋｉｎｋｔｏｂｅｒ　ｍａｓｔｅｒｌｉｓｔ】

Felix had downloaded yet another one of the newest games that was famous on the internet.

You were happy to see him have fun, but he got so immersed in it that his life started to focus only on that game. He had no time for you anymore, everyday becoming the same routine.

He came back from work, ate dinner with you and then left to go 'shower' while he made you clean the table to turn on his pc in the studio room and update the game if needed, staying awake for hours playing and then heading to sleep.

The studio room was a big mistake, you realized. You thought you would be able to spend time there together, but Felix made it his personal man cave. Not a single time did you step in that room voluntarily, only when it was late and you had to drag Felix to bed to make him sleep.

You felt like a mother taking care of a teenage son who was obsessed with video games, not like a woman living together with her boyfriend.

That's why you decided it was time to take cards into the matter and intervitate with his addiction with that particular game.

You tried not having dinner ready to cook with him, but he opted to call for the nearest pizza place and have it delivered, waiting for it to arrive at the studio and telling you to please receive it. That was the first strike.

Then, you decided to be out all day, calling some of your friends to go dance with them in a girl's night outing, and all Felix said was 'have fun, baby girl. I'll stay awake waiting for you.'

Anr you were actually annoyed that he did wait awake for you. In the studio room, playing the game and only welcoming you back when you told him you were going to sleep. That was strike two.

You had a last idea to get his mind off the game,it was inspired by a trend on tiktok that was about taking off your towel in front of your partner while they played and film their reactions. But you had a twist to that.

Instead of going naked, you would be wearing his favorite lingerie, a matching pastel pink bra and thong with white thigh high stockings that you knew drove him crazy. I'd that disntger his attention from the game, you didn't know what else to do.

Felix came back from work, complimenting your outfit that allowed him to see the stockings under your dress as you had dinner together. He seemed more talkative that night, participating more in the conversation and making you all sort of question. You hoped that was a clue, meaning that you were doing things the right way.

He finished, helping you clean the table and then going straight to the studio room. He stopped showering before playing when he shamelessly stepped into the room to turn on the pc, so that was the time to execute your plan.

You were going to give him some time, walking to your shared bedroom and started to put on some makeup. It had been a long time since you last got ready to be on a date with him, so why not try and doll yourself up for a little? You fixed your hair, put on natural looking makeup and took off your clothes, except for the lingerie that covered you.

You made your way to Felix's hideout, knocking on the door before opening when Felix said 'come in.' There he was, all focused on the screen and clicking the buttons on the keyboard, groaning in frustration when his character died.

He stopped looking at the screen, turning to look at you while he opened a water bottle, his mouth hung open as he caught sight of you all dolled up for him. You smiled, opening your arms to hug him and straddling his lap, pressing your lips against him and kissing him passionately. The match on the game behind you was still going, neither of you caring.

"Are you gonna stop playing the game now? I've missed you, Felix" you said after you pulled away from him. He made you sit on his lap and returned his attention to the screen when a new match started, losing the previous one for being afk, the chat in the game calling him a thrower, the enemy team thanking him for letting them win.

"Just let me finish this one game and then I'm all yours, angel" you hummed, acknowledging him that you listened to his words. You made yourself comfortable on his lap, looking how he pressed the keyboard and flipped the mouse to accumulate kills and get the win for his team. He was so experienced with his fingers, knowing what to press and what ability he needed to help his team win. And then it hit you why he was so good using his fingers with you.

Seeing how he used them made you needy, his fingers danced through the buttons so beautifully, it made you want to have them deep inside you.

Without thinking, you placed your hand on top of the one he was holding the mouse with. He didn't say anything, so you left it there allowing him to move under your hand, staring at how he moved in the game. But he displayed the game's menu, and said:

"My teammates are gonna hate me for this, but fuck it. I don't care, I can't have you wearing this and sitting on my lap pretending like I don't want to fuck you numb" he exited the match, closed the game and allowed his hands to roam on your body, tracing the lingerie you were wearing with his fingertips. He rested his chin on your shoulder, one of his hands slowly going down and slipping past your lacy panties to touch you right where you needed him to touch you, pinching your clit carefully and making you moan, spreading your legs to give him more access to your sex.

You threw your head back, focusing on how Felix passed his fingers through your folds, his middle finger teasing your entrance making you sigh, meanwhile his other hand was busy squeezing your boob and pinching your nipple through the delicate material of your bra.

Just when you were about to tell him to stop teasing you, Felix inserted one of his digits inside your wet pussy, making you moan. It wasn't the part you wanted to have inside you, but it worked just fine.

"You're so tight, Y/N, God I hadn't realized how much I've missed you" you smiled after hearing his words but your face suddenly changed when he inserted another finger and started making scissoring moves.

Rubbing your clit with his thumb while he inserted and removed his fingers from you felt good, it gave you the pleasure you were craving since he downloaded that damn game. Your legs were now completely spread, resting on the armrests of the chair, one of your hands was holding Felix's cheek after being tangled on his hair before, while your other hand held his thigh to support you on the chair as you squirmed, victim of the pleasure your boyfriend was providing you with.

When he found your G-spot you almost screamed, holding tighter on his thigh, your walls clenching around him meaning that your release was just about to happen.

"You want to cum already, princess? Seems like you really missed me and didn't touch yourself. Such a good girl you are, so beautiful, waiting for me to give you the pleasure you need" he whispered against your ear, tone low and deep like he knew would drive you crazy. You just needed his permission to come undone, resisting the need of releasing your climax.

"Cum for me, angel" and you did, your juices covering his fingers as you moaned his name, a form to thank him for finally giving you the attention you needed.

"That was good, Felix, but I really need to have your cock inside me" you cried out, removing one of your legs from where it was and turning to look at him with pleading eyes.

"This is only the start, princess. I'm also dying to be inside you, feel how you take me so well. Let's go to the bedroom and continue there, hmm? What do you say?" you stood up, supporting yourself on the desk in front of you before making your way to your next destination, waiting for your legs to stabilize so you could walk on your own.

But Felix had no patience, throwing you over his shoulder as if you were a sack of potatoes and making you laugh.

"I don't think I can wait for any longer, I need you so badly" he explained. You passed one of his hands through his locks.

"No need to hurry, Lix. We have all night available"

"Then I hope you started praying already because I'll fuck you until you can’t walk tomorrow."

#skz smut #skz fanfic #stray kids smut #stray kids fanfic #felix smut #skz felix #kinktober 2020 #han jizung's kinktober list #day 12

[falseidol-falseprophet]

Secret Garden

Daylight is a privileged for the simple few.

You have to realize that not everyone can simply enjoy the golden glow of the midday sun. The way it blankets the world in warmth and gingerly guides life the way only the sun can. The way it convinces the sweat to fall from a brow; the way the leaves will dance under its lights, the shadows below following their lead. Clouds will part the sea of blue above and the sun will curl around them, the rays vast and endless, ever stretching on and out to fill the sky.

It is strange and unexpected; not impossible. He is sat behind a rock. He is aware his horns stick out and he is not particularly trying to hide. The feet of ladybugs across his knee joints and thighs will earn a small almost astonished huff from him. How dare something so small not fear him...But it was silently welcomed.

It just simply was.. inspiring. His fingers would twirl and tug the long blades of grass below him though he was always careful of the flowers.

This is something he is embarrassed about. Anyone would look at him and quickly assume him to be the first to rip them from their stalks, without mercy. But nature wasn't like humanity. Maybe they mirrored each other and moved together or at the very least around one another. But nature never turned him away. Nature did not belittle him for being a monster, it opened its arms and gave him a space to appreciate all it had to offer.

The grass below him would tickle the clawed pieces of the very tips of his fingers and he could feel the warmth of the sun on him. It was something vague and carried with it an all too known melancholy feeling. His head would bow and the sun would place itself upon his brow, a soft kiss and a whisper of calm.

He will pull the grass up much like a child. He will immediately feel the guilt turn his non-existent stomach but in this moment he allows himself to simply...exist. And how much more human could one possibly be?

If not to bask and be impulsive and a bit pointless.

He could feel the weight slip from his shoulders and his arms would unlock from their places. The purring from his core was loud, not loud enough to cancel out the breeze passing between his plating, cooling the wires hidden there. A gust at just the right angle would pull a soft whistle from him.

Revenant will raise his hands, and watch the wind carry the blades away and across the sea of green at his feet.

It is later in the afternoon and he has hidden away behind this rock...well, truthfully, he'd lost track of time. He'd ignored every summon, every beck and call and question. Aside from a handful of staff, nobody came looking for him and some days he preferred this to be the case.

Her hum would sit on the wind and for a second he had to make sure he hadn't imagined the sound.

Heavy footsteps accompanied the hums and he was hesitant to turn to look at her, too scared the guilt would consume him but he felt her sit beside him, and she pulled her knees to her chest and he could not find it in himself to resist her any longer.

The bright red curls atop her head caught and cradled the bright light of the afternoon sun and he watched her as she watched the world around them. Her eyes fixated on the Horizon, and that made sense for him, and for her. Always looking ahead, always focusing on tomorrow... It was that same drive and passion and ruthless kindness that allowed the two to grow as close as they had in the past few weeks.

Nothing compared to seeing her here though, like this. Sun kissed and brilliant. His jealousy was barely contained but he would bite his tongue.

"Why're you all by your lonesome, wee thing?"

"We all need a break every now and again--"

She would chuckle, sigh, stretch, and lean her head back to rest upon the rock behind the both of them.

"Cannae argue with that..." He would chuckle and join her, leaning himself back, arms snapping back into their sockets with a soft click and he could feel her eyes on him, searching, taking mental notes and he had to roll his eyes. Moments like this he thanked the lack of facial muscles for he could not even think to hide his amusement.

He understood that was part of the deal here, their friendship.

So carelessly using that word still made him feel strange...but it was becoming less heavy the more he did so.

Their late night talking-- and well-- days on end, talking, he'd allowed her to poke around in him numerous times. They were like children, really. He'd ask a question. She'd answer. Then it would be her turn... and it was the little things that kept him coming back. Like the way she would always pour him a cup of tea, even though he couldn't drink it, she knew he loved the smell of it...same with baking. Or she'd light a candle...

And there would be those moments where he'd come see her in the very early hours of the morning, right before the sun would announce itself, where she'd be asleep at her desk..or on the floor... papers scattered about her studio apartment or her lab... he'd lift her up, tuck her in on the couch or on the bed in her room on base, and let her embrace the rare moment of a full eight hours of sleep... cook her a meal so she would eat... her head stayed in the clouds. Always concerned with bigger and better things. Eyes always fixated on the future...and the past.

He adored that about her, though.

His wondering thoughts had distracted him from her leaning her head on his shoulder, and the sigh that left her lips. Revenant finally looked over and  down at her, bumping the top of her head with his nose.

"What is it, Mary?"

"The weights gettin’ to me, dearie..."

"I know..."

A pause.

"Do you think I'll ever get em back?"

His eyes moved to the edge of the world.

"Yes."

"Do ya mean it? Ya not jus yankin me chain, aye?"

A chuckle.

"I would never do such a thing, Doctor Somers. Scouts honor."

She nudged him, the laughter mixing with the warmth of the summer air the sun began to disappear.The lady bugs made their departure. The flowers around them began to lay themselves to rest. She'd stand up, dusting herself off and offer him a hand. Marys lab coat caught the wind, her free hand holding the goggles on her head in place. He would look up at her face and into her eyes. The smile there was warmer than a thousand suns...

"Come along little one, we've got a long night ahead of us."

He'd take her hand, and followed her into the base.

#revenant #horizon #apex #apex legends #one shot #apex one shot

[bitterfrosts]

For the character asks: Song Lan (obviously). Or Wen Ning, if you've already done him!

Why not both?~

SONG LAN:

Sexuality Headcanon: oh he is demisexual all the way! I can’t really picture him really being interested until he meets and forms a bond with xxc.

Gender Headcanon: Song Lan was always called a boy and had he/him used for him so I think for most of his life we was like “guess I’m a boy ¯\_(ツ)_/¯” and then again, met xxc who changes presentation and pronouns more than he changes hanfu (xxc that’s gross do ur laundry pls!) and Song Lan is like “ :o you can do that?” And xxc is like “??? Of course you can? Anyway please use they/them for me today I am in a mood” and so Song Lan is experimenting with it now!

A ship I have with said character: songxiao first and foremost! But I also like him with Lan Xichen and Wen Ning! ... Song Lan is pretty much my fandom bicycle. I feel like Song Lan is the type of guy that needs someone to look out for and coddle, so he gets along well with characters who would want that or need it, ie. xxc loves the attention and wen ning and lan xichen both need and deserve to be coddled for once so. >_>

A BROTP I have with said character: I like to think he keeps correspondence with lwj considering PARALLELS and imo he and mianmian would be bros too I think!!!

A NOTP I have with said character: ... I honestly don’t think I really have one? I’ve never seen a character that I didn’t think could have SOMETHING with him in some way. Even Xue Yang! Xue Yang has a ~thing~ for him (hatred or otherwise) that inspires a kind of passion and Song “obviously has the biggest dick in the series and you can’t tell me otherwise” Lan is ok with indulging it bc he has a thing for subduing him without having to be called on it. ...I forget where I was going with this... anyway no notps here! Song Lan harem rights!

A random headcanon: Song Lan CAN NOT handle spicy food in any way. Refuses to even touch it. He gives all spicy dishes to Xiao Xingchen who destroyed his taste buds with too much spicy food years ago.

General Opinion over said character: Song Lan is my favorite character in the series and by this point I think everyone knows. My ONE qualm is that a lot of us Song Lan fans tend to put him on a pedestal so to speak, and we can forget that he has flaws. Like he’s pretty vengeful and angry! We see that! It’s what ends up accidentally driving xxc away and caused his downfall at yi city! But aside from that... I love him and I will never not love him ❤️

WEN NING:

Sexuality Headcanon: Disnt really care either way until he met Personal Closet Key Wei Wuxian, then was all “oh don’t you just love when men? 🥰”

Gender Headcanon: HE 👏 IS 👏 TRANSMASC 👏 and wen qing does all his gender affirmative surgeries bc she doesn’t trust anyone else to do them properly and her baby bro can have whatever he wants!

A ship I have with said character: ningxian has a place always in my heart and tbh is actually my preferred wwx ship, but I like a little wangningxian also! Basically wen ning harem rights also. He deserves as many boyfriends as he wants.

A BROTP I have with said character: he and yanli would have been BEST FRIENDS were it not for shenanigans. They have similar personalities and they need friends!

A NOTP I have with said character: again, wen ning gets as many boyfriends as he wants. I suppose if pressed I wouldn’t ship him with any jins just bc ... yeah. But anything is possible? I’ve seen wen ning/Jin zixuan done before.

A random headcanon: the only reason he and wen qing lived for as long as they did is bc wen ning used to be a mama’s boy once upon a time and learned all mama wen’s recipes. Wen qing can’t cook and would poison them all. Seriously... au where he and yanli swap soup recipes when????

General Opinion over said character: I also love wen ning a whole lot! I feel like trying to find content specifically just for him as a main character like for fic is kinda hard tho? Like... he takes a backseat whenever wwx is involved unless you are digging for ningxian SPECIFICALLY. Which is understandable since he is a supporting character, but I think he deserves MORE.

#song lan #wen ning

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #480

“the doomsday clock was made by mankind”

Do you support PETA? No, because they are WAY too extreme. Have you ever lied about your gender? No. Have you ever had escargot? NOOOOOOOO. You couldn't pay me to try that shit. Have you played Breath of the Wild? No; Zelda games aren't my thing. I've watched Game Grumps play it, though. At what venue was the last concert you attended? Idr, somewhere in Raleigh. Who was playing at the last concert you attended? Alice Cooper. Maybe one day I'll have a new answer, lol. Do you have any anniversaries coming up? No. Would you try grapes on a pizza? Holy fuck, ew. Have you ever tried an oyster? How would you describe the experience? Oysters look fucking disgusting. Never. Has anyone ever specifically painted you a painting? Not a painting, no, but I've had drawings made for me. Would you ever want to try pole dancing? Nah. Have you ever had any sort of paranormal experience? Yes. Have you ever gotten something stuck in your skin? (ie: glass shard, gravel) Yeah, like splinters. And graphite. Do any of your grandparents live a nursing home? They're all deceased, but none did. Do you have a USB drive that is shaped like anything unique? No; mine is just a solid hot pink. What country would you like to visit most? South Africa. Whose birthday is closest to today’s date? (someone you know) Girt's birthday is the 10th! Do you know anyone in another country? I have Australian and European friends, yes. Have you ever wanted to be on a game show? Not seriously. Do you believe taking a picture of someone is taking a piece of their soul? Ha, this question makes me think of the quote from SOMA. Anyway, no. Do you have any friends with the same first name as you? No. How many states have you lived in? One. Pancakes or waffles? Waffles, so I can spread peanut butter on them. :') What is the saddest book you’ve ever read? Johnny Got His Gun. ZERO competition. What political cause are you most passionate about? Probably LGBTQ+ rights. Really just equality in general. Have you ever considered having children? The only time I've ever in my life thought I wanted kids was when I was with Jason. Hell, I wanted two or three. Now I'm just like... nah man no thank you. Have you ever considered acting? No. Who was the last person you slept next to? Sara. Do you think you can be in love and still cheat on your S.O.? Ha, no. What is the most embarrassing thing anyone has on video of you? I dunno. Did you ever get lost as a child? Once at the grocery store. A sweet old lady helped me find Mom. Do you know how to play any card games? The very basic ones, and Magic: The Gathering. What are you currently most looking forward to? Mom to feel better so Girt can come over. What is the best television show you’ve ever watched? Hm... Fullmetal Alchemist has a pretty bangin' story. What color are your parents’ eyes? Brown. Are you more dependent or independent? I've very dependent, honestly. Are there any stuffed animals in the room you’re in? Yeah, loads. I have a shelf full of my meerkat collection. Do you love animals? I adore them. I quite frankly don't like anyone who doesn't, because... how. How many people have you kissed in a car? One or two? Who made you mad last? My mom. She said something that just really hurt my feelings. How long was your last shower? It was longer than usual because standing, taking steps to turn, propping my legs up, etc. was fucking excruciating because my feet, ankles, and calves were so swollen. It's so fucking infuriating; in a previous survey I mentioned "oh it's because my body isn't used to getting up and down so much! it's improvement! :D", but no. The swelling was from sitting too long at the desk. My legs are so used to being propped up from being in bed that it caused edema when I was finally sitting. I went back to my fucking bed now because Mom mentioned that it could get extremely dangerous if the fluid buildup got too severe. And of course now that I'm back in bed, the swelling is receding. I can't fucking win. Have you ever had a really bad haircut? Looking back, I think the haircut I had before this current one was pretty bad, but at least it showed me I'd like short hair on myself. What’s your favorite DIY crafts YouTube channel? I don't watch DIY. What would be the best surprise you could receive right now? At this moment, just give me the magic answer to losing all this fucking weight and getting in shape and being happy. Do you usually forgive when someone hurts your or try to get revenge? I forgive too much. Were there any subjects in school that were really easy for you? English and most science. Did you ever skip a grade or get held back a grade? No. Was your first car used or new? I haven't had my own car yet. How often do you watch the news? Never. Do you have a fan in your room? I have two. Have you ever hatched an egg? In elementary school, as a class. It was a chick. :') I think it was in kindergarten? Would you like to go to a fortune teller? No, because I wouldn't support them spouting bullshit and lying to people. Do you chew gum on a daily basis? No. I've actually been craving gum for a long time now... For each person you’ve kissed, describe your feelings in one word: My feelings towards them? Jason: Remorseful. Tyler: Eye roll. Sara: thankful. Girt: love. Do you have “friends” that you actually hate? That's some juvenile shit. No. Would you rather get [another] tattoo or piercing? Gimme both, but if I had to pick, a tattoo. If you’re dating someone, how long has it been? It's been just shy of a month Feels a lot longer. If you’re a girl, have you ever had the urge shave your hair? Not shave my entire head, no. Do you live by a forest? Not anymore. :/ Do your parents drink? My dad is a recovered alcoholic, so he doesn't touch it anymore. Mom only drinks lightly for special occasions. Does downloading music without paying make you feel guilty? Yes, and yet I do it anyway. :x Does your house have air conditioning? Yes. What do you believe in more: Ghosts or demons? Ghosts. I don't believe in demons. Do you think they’re making too big of a deal over Michael Jackson’s death? Old survey is old, but no, not really. He was an absolute pop icon that was deeply loved by millions and millions and inspired the genre deeply. I wasn't even a big fan and yet I felt for those who were. French fries or onion rings? The former. I don't like onion rings. Favorite healthy snack? Um. I suppose apple slices w/ peanut butter, especially lately. Or strawberries. ]If you see a bee in your house... are you going to kill it? Bees honestly scare me, so I'm not touching it. Mom will have to get it, and I know she would kill it. Would you feel funny if you kissed somebody of the same sex? Done it before, and it didn't feel weird. If your best friend grabs your hand, what do you automatically do? I'd look at her and ask what's wrong. What’s something you can cook or bake like a pro? Nothing. Do you tend to flirt a lot, even when the person isn’t single? No, especially if the person is taken. Can grills be sexy on a guy? Grills are unattractive on everyone. Have you ever flown first class? Ha, yeah right. Are you the type of person who can shake insults off easily, or do they tend to stick around in your brain & bother you? They stick around for years upon years. Some I think I'll never forget.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''countdown's begun'' by ozzy osbourne

[bellemorte180]

Je suis désolé

for @klarolineagainnaturally​, I hope this is what you were looking for. If not, I still hope you enjoy the read! 

​Je suis désolé

The one bad thing about New York City was the rush hour traffic. Blaring car horns, curses from angry drivers and a few fist fights were not uncommon during the commute from one part of the city to another. Departing from Wall Street towards Queens was at least an hour drive and Klaus felt the pounding of his chest the entire time. He inhaled the stale smell of the stained polyester seats and smoke from the cab driver in front of him. The shining summer sun lingered over the city and Klaus had the windows rolled down due to the air conditioner in the taxi being broken.

The taxi rolled to a stop in front of a dusty red brick building that was only three stories high, an address Klaus had given the man an hour previously and tossed the driver at least a hundred dollars more than the total of the fair. Klaus climbed out of the cab and stared at the building. His eyes moved up to the window on the top left and he could see the light on, telling him that she had not left for night. Klaus was prepared to sit on those uncomfortable looking brick steps all night if he had too until she returned home if he had discovered that she had left.

A thousand thoughts rolled in his mind and not a single one of them were calm. He had no idea if the night would end the way he wanted and by the way the heat was making his white button-down shirt appear damp was inspiring little confidence. He fucked up and Klaus knew that. It was something he had come to terms with days ago and was trying to make it right. This was his last stop and possibly the most important one. He climbed the stairs, took a deep breath and pressed the intercom button.

“Hello?”

“Caroline. It’s me.” He heard the click of the button on the other end and quickly began speaking again, not wanting to lose this chance. “Please, you don’t have to let me up but just listen. Please.” He heard the buzzing, letting him know that she was still on the other end of the intercom and he pressed on. “I’m sorry. I’m really really, sorry. I’m an asshole and I should have listened to you and not my bastard of a father. You were right because you’re always right and I should have trusted you.”

“You hurt me Klaus. Like really hurt me.” Her voice was small on the other end and it severed his heart in two. In the year that he had known Caroline and eight months of their relationship, Klaus felt as though he finally had a purpose in life. Her smiles, laughter and overall sunny disposition made the world make sense for once. No longer was he defined by his father’s hatred, the family name and company he despised. For the first time, Klaus knew what it was like to really love someone and be loved in return. Then Klaus’s pride and temper got in the way along with his never-ending desire to please the man he wished for a long time was his father.

“I know and I’m sorry. Can I please just…. I’ll do anything to make it up to you.”

“You get ten minutes.” He heard the door to the building unlock and Klaus all but burst through the door. He took the old stairway two at a time, passing an older woman who always gave Klaus the stink eye whenever he came to be with Caroline as he ran up to the third floor. When he reached the landing of Caroline floor, he did not even have to count the doorways until he reached hers; because the door was already open.

Caroline was leaning against archway into her apartment in black slacks, a button-down white shirt and her blonde hair was in a messy bun. Her make-up was minimal and her feet bare. Her arms were crossed over her chest and Klaus could see that she was tense; on guard and preparing for a fight. The sight made him hate himself all the more. The worried and almost anxious look on her face was not one he liked to see on her, especially since he was the one who caused it.

“You’re getting ready for work.” Klaus had seen that outfit a thousand times, both having taken her out of it and watched her put it on while he lounged from one of their beds. He mentally wondered how long he would have before Caroline had to rush out that door. He knew there was a chance she had to work due to her schedule being dependent on events and clients.

“Just got back actually.” Caroline pushed off the doorframe and stepped inside, letting Klaus into her apartment. Klaus looked around and saw that it was spotless, telling him that she had spent their week apart cleaning it from top to bottom; something she did when she was nervous or upset. Guilt settled in him again. “It was a late lunch meeting on Wall Street. Not far from your office. For the Salvatore Brother’s actually. You know Stefan, right? The man I wasn’t having an affair with.”

“I know! I know. God I’m so sorry. I cannot tell you enough how sorry I am.” Klaus looked at her helplessly and saw the pool of tears in her eyes. He wanted to step forward and take her into his arms, but he wondered if she would let him. “I am an asshole in the first degree. I do not deserve to be back in your good graces, but I can only hope that one day you will forgive me. Even if I have to beg every day for it.”

“Why? Why would you accuse me of such a thing? Why would you not talk to me if you were concerned that I was spending too much time with Stefan, who is my friend and completely in love with Elena by the way.”

“Mikael.”

“What?”

“Mikael told me he saw the two of you together. He said he didn’t want to see me in another relationship like I had been with Tatia and actually appeared to be acting like a father for once. He prayed on every insecurity I had and made me believe that you were using me and that you were sleeping with Stefan behind my back.” Caroline’s eyes were wide, and her jaw slacked, surprise written on her face. “But I can’t lay all the blame at Mikael’s feet. I knew he hated me, and I shouldn’t have believed anything he told me. All I can do right now is say I’m sorry. That I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t understand. Why would he do such a thing?” Caroline took a small step towards him and Klaus took that as a positive sign but did not want to push the boundaries that he would let her set. “We were together for eight months. Why now? Why would he lie to you about me now?”

“Because Elijah told him, not out of malice, but he told Mikael that I was going to propose.” Klaus told her in a hopeless tone, his arms hanging by his side in an almost limp manner. He took a step towards her and took one of her hands, waiting for Caroline to snatch it back. Perhaps it was out of shock, but she let him hold it, tracing his thumb over her knuckles. “I had the ring ready and, on the day that I was going to ask you, he came into my office and told me that he saw you and Stefan having sex in a boardroom during the fundraiser two months ago. Apparently, the truth was that he didn’t want his bastard son marrying someone who wasn’t from the Upper East Side.”

“What!? Stefan and I never, ever been together that way. Ever.” Tears were flowing down her face, a look of complete betrayal on her face. “I’m good enough to cater Mikael’s events and parties but not good enough to marry his son.” Klaus could not help it but reach out to her and pulled her to his chest. She went willingly and pressed her face into the button-down shirt; not caring if her tears stained his shirt. “What a fucking asshole!”

“I know. I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have listened to him.” Klaus whispered and held her close. “The passion you have for cooking and baking is one of the many reasons I fell in love with you.” Klaus kissed the top of her head, waiting for her to pull back from him. She didn’t. “I remember the night we met. You served me champagne when one of your waiters didn’t show up and you stepped up to cover him. I remember thinking you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen and spent months trying to get you to have dinner with me.”

“You were surrounding by woman in fancy dresses that night. I was in black slacks and a white shirt. I thought you were crazy to pick me over anyone of them.” Caroline’s muffled voice came from his chest. She nuzzled him slightly before pulling back and looking up at him. “Regardless of what Mikael did, you hurt me Klaus. Like really hurt me and I want to forgive you because I know that after Tatia, trust issues run deep with you, but you should know that I’m not her. I would never do that to you.”

“I know and I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.” He kissed the top of her head again, trying to show how much he wanted to amend his mistakes and just be who they were before Mikael metaled in their relationship. “If you give me a second chance, I will always come and talk to you first. I will not jump to conclusions and I will try and keep my temper in check.”

“Klaus, you jumping to conclusions and your temper are kind of a package deal when it comes to you.” Caroline muttered, knowing the worst parts of him and yet still fell in love with him anyway. “I love you. I really loved you and before we can decide if we want to have this again, you will never accuse me of that again. Ever. You will come and talk to me first before yelling and screaming and throwing wild accusations back in my face. Do you understand?”

“Yes. Completely. I will come and talk with you first, in everything. I promise.”

“Okay.” Caroline brought his hands up to her lips and kissed his knuckles. “There is one other thing. After that night, I was offered a job as a pastry chef at Dupain in Paris. I signed the portion of my catering company over to Elena and next week I was planning on flying out to look for an apartment.” Caroline gripped his hand, not knowing what Klaus was going to say. “I thought that we were done and the idea of being in New York, eventually running into you and the idea of seeing you with someone else…”

Klaus leaned down and kissed her lips, Caroline feeling the smile on them. He placed his hands on her face and looked into her eyes whenever he pulled away from her lips. The smile on his lips was wide and happy, as though he had just received the best news he had ever heard. He reached down and picked Caroline up, spinning her around; her laughter echoing through the room.

“I am so proud of you.” Klaus told her as Caroline wrapped her arms around his shoulders, not telling go even after he set her back down on the ground. “This is everything you’ve been working for since before I met you. Culinary school, the catering company, your never-ending baking and cake decorating all comes down to this moment. Paris! Caroline. You’re moving to Paris and I’ve never been prouder of you.”

“Really?!”

“Really.” Klaus touched her face again, tracing her cheek bones and just held her close. Caroline buried her face into his neck while Klaus rocked them, bursting with happy excitement at the prospect of her success. “Congratulations Caroline. This is amazing. You’ll love Paris.”

“But what about you? And us?” Caroline whispered into his neck. “I took the job because I thought you were disgusted with me and I was so angry at you for not trusting me. I thought we were done but if we give this a shot, how can I go to Paris? Your entire life is here in New York! Your family’s company. Your friends. Everything.”

“No. No. No. No. You’re not doing that. You are not giving up this opportunity for me. Absolutely not.” Klaus pulled her out of his arms and looked at her deeply. “I love you and I know how much this means to you. Do you remember that night after I finally convinced you to have dinner with me?” Caroline nodded. “We shared a bottle of champagne on the rooftop of my apartment and looked at the city below. You told me that your dream was to one day be a pastry chef in Paris and maybe one day own your own bakery. I’m not letting you throw that away for me. No.”

“But-“

“So, I’ll just have to move to Paris with you.”

“What! Klaus. That’s insane.”

“I want to marry you. That has not changed and no, this is not a proposal before you ask.” Klaus smirked at her when Caroline opened her mouth. Klaus placed his finger on her lips and Caroline couldn’t help but give it a light peck causing the smile on Klaus’s lips to grow wider. “When I confronted Mikael today about the lies he told me, I also told him I was no longer going to work for him. I quiet, signed all my clients over to Elijah and walked out after tossing my company car keys in Mikael’s face.”

“Oh my god. Seriously?!” Caroline gave a slight hysterical laugh. She reached for Klaus’s hand again and just held it, unable to let go of him just yet. Her blue eyes were wide, and a small smile played on her lips. “Good for you. Like, really. Good for you and about time! You hated that place. What was your plan after that?”

“I haven’t really thought much else through to be honest, I just needed to get here as quickly as a I could. Or at least as quickly as a taxi from Wall Street to Queens could get here.” Caroline laughed at the truth of New York traffic and shook her head. “But I have my trust fund that will last a long while and maybe I will give painting an honest go. Paris feels like the ideal place for that.”

“Yeah, I guess it really does.” A happy and an overjoyed laugh echoed through the small apartment and Caroline all but bounced on her feet. The mood in the air had shifted from one of pain and despair to bubbling excitement. There were many things that they needed to discuss and sort through but they both knew that this was a fresh start for them, and one away from his family that never really seemed to approve of their relationship. “We’re moving to Paris!”

“We’re moving to Paris!”

#klaroline #for lottie #hope it was what you were looking for! #a mix of angst #and a mix of fluffy