#but it is a 2024 goal to get seen by a doctor | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

7grandmel · 1 month

Text

Todays rip: 14/03/2024

My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil!

Season 1 Featured on: 7 Somari Dad Also on: Your Onii-Chan's Favorite Rips!

Ripped by Smoky

youtube

Look: It's a point I've made before and a point I won't needlessly harp on about, so let's get it out of the way: Season 1 of SiIvaGunner was, as most firsts tend to be, far simpler than what we'd get just a year or two later and beyond. But it was before SiIvaGunner came to be known for its lovingly crafted and detailed mashups like Hella Pummel, before the ludicrously in-depth projects like my rip :), before we'd start getting delicately authentic melodyswaps like Outertale of much of any original covers or compositions like Trial of the Heart. Back when the very idea of disguising video game music edits as normal, unedited music rips, was still something really novel. The novelty of the channel paired, with a lack of basically any set-in-stone recurring jokes other than Grand Dad, resulted in some true classics like Pikmin Park, Live and Ooooooooooooooh, Dr. Soulja - and, of course, My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil!.

Now, let's start with a bit of a disclaimer - there's obviously a whole bunch of baggage to unpack with the humor surrounding the Your Onii-Chan's Favorite Rips! album in general. 2016 was the absolute plateau of edgy YouTube humor being in the mainstream, right before LeafyIsHere, iDubbbz, Keemstar, Filthy Frank and all the others sort of petered out from YouTube's stricter moderation. It was, in no uncertain terms, the time where making fun of how weird anime could be was at its most trendy. The joke in My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil!, and the joke of almost all the rips featured in Your Onii-Chan's Favorite Rips!, is to reference the anime franchise Oreimo, one that's effectively built entirely around the theme of being attracted to your younger sister. Despite its incestuous contents, the series sports a poppy, happy-go-lucky, bubbly aesthetic - hence, prime material to make jokes about how bizarre it is for Japan to effectively glorify such taboo relationships. Now, this is far from the only risque topic that early SiIvaGunner chose to tackle, and even back then there were topics such as described in Stickerbrush State of Mind that were still seen as going "too far" - but many of those have faded away as distant memories overtime, rips which failed to gain much of any traction, only really remembered as an edgier footnote in the channel's legacy.

So then...what makes My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil! any different, worth highlighting here today?

Put simply, I don't believe its million-plus views come purely from Oreimo fans, or from people deep in the trenches who find references to weird anime to be inherently funny. I believe the views are there because of a far simpler, far more effective joke in play: the contrast between a song as bubbly as Oreimo's opening theme irony, and the vocals of E.G.G.M.A.N. and the character its attached to, is simply very funny. The original E.G.G.M.A.N. is sort of an industrial rock "anthem", where the titular doctor celebrates and glorifies his own destructive goals in a theatrical, self-aggrandizing, yet still aggressive way - an aggression that feels as if it disappears entirely without the track's original instrumentation. An aggression that, with the instrumentation replaced with the sugary sweetness of irony, turns into something purely theatrical, like a performance from a School Idol, a performance from the heart - which, given who Dr. Eggman is as a character, is obviously a very funny mental image. Pikmin Park was listed as one of the classic Season 1 rips above for good reason - it, too, plays on this same sort of contrast in songs used for a mental image that's simply too good not to get a chuckle out of.

Thing is, while Stickerbrush State of Mind was fondly remembered for just how much of a genuine banger it was, while Pikmin Park is considered a classic due purely to how well its joke works, I believe My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil! succeeds above both of them due to mastering both sides of the coin. It's already very funny as a concept due to the contrast in songs used, yet a similar BPM and excellent mashup work by Smoky makes the rip an incredibly fun rip to just listen to as a good piece of music, vocals and instrumentation working in harmony far better than they probably should. It is, in that sense, a shining example of SiIvaGunner's biggest strength, the ability to make its viewers smile both from its jokes and from the surprise of hearing good music. It's the perfect harmonization of two jokes, preserving the strengths of E.G.G.M.A.N's vocals whilst using every piece of irony possible to highlight this new cutesy feel - a deceptively simple joke executed perfectly, transcending the dicey origins of its conception and becoming far funnier in a completely different way.

18 notes · View notes

aimeedaisies · 1 month

Text

'He's frustrated': King Charles's nephew Peter Phillips says monarch's cancer recovery 'taking a little longer'

A senior member of the royal family has provided a major update on King Charles’ cancer battle and told Sky News Australia whether the monarch is likely to visit Australia as planned later this year.

Published March 24, 2024 - 8:00AM

King Charles has released a statement on Princess Kate’s announcement she will undergo chemotherapy. The statement, which comes from a Buckingham Palace spokesperson says King Charles is "so proud of Catherine for her courage in speaking as she did". King Charles, who is also receiving treatment for an undisclosed cancer, says he has "remained in the closest contact with his beloved daughter-in-law" after they both spent time in hospital together in January. Both the King and Queen "will continue to offer their love and support to the whole family through this difficult time", the statement added. Princess Kate was made aware of a cancerous presence following tests in the aftermath of her abdominal surgery in January.

Royal family member Peter Phillips has revealed his uncle King Charles’s cancer recovery is “taking a little longer” but insists the King remains in good spirits amid his health battle.

Phillips, 46, is the only son of Princess Anne and her first husband Captain Mark Phillips. He was Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Phillip's first grandchild.

At the time of his birth, Phillips was 5th in the line of succession to the British throne but has fallen down to the 18th position following the births of his cousins and their children.

Phillips is currently visiting Australia as patron of charity ISPS Handa, which supports disabled sportsmen and women, and sat down for an exclusive interview with Sky News Australia’s Royal Report where he opened up about Charles’s cancer recovery.

Peter Phillips told Sky News Australia that his uncle King Charles is "feeling frustrated". Picture: Sky News Australia.

“He's in good spirits,” Phillips revealed during the sit down with Sky News Australia host Caroline Di Russo.

“I think, ultimately, he's hugely frustrated. he's frustrated that he can't get on and do everything that he wants to be able to do.

“But he is very pragmatic (and) he understands that there's a period of time that he really needs to focus on himself.”

Charles, 75, was diagnosed with an undisclosed form of cancer while undergoing a separate procedure to treat an enlarged prostate in January.

Buckingham Palace confirmed the diagnosis on February 5, sparking a global outpouring of concern for the new monarch who only ascended the throne about 18 months ago.

Although Charles has mostly withdrawn from public life, he continues to receive his government red boxes and hold meetings with Prime Minister Rishi Sunak to ensure the United Kingdom can function as normal.

Phillips revealed that Charles was “pushing” staff to resume more of his royal duties against the advice of his doctors.

“He is always pushing, his staff and everybody and his doctors and nurses to be able to say ‘actually come on, you know, can I do this? Can I do that?’" Phillips said.

“So the overriding message would be that he's obviously very keen to get back to a form of normality.

“And he's probably frustrated that, recovery is taking a little longer than probably he would want it to.”

The monarch’s illness has cast doubt on a range of royal engagements slated for 2024, including Charles and Camilla’s first planned tour of Australia since becoming King and Queen, respectively.

However, Phillips revealed that Charles and Camilla are “very keen” to visit Australia as soon as the King’s health has stabilised.

“They would obviously love to see as many people as possible,” he said.

“You know, they are they are very keen and very active to be able to, you know, be seen and meet as many people as possible from all walks of life.

“And that is, you know, that is what their, their sort of set the goal on being able to be seen to be, you know, accessible to as many people as possible.”

Phillips sat down with Sky News Australia prior to Princess Catherine announcing her own cancer battle on Friday.

The Princess of Wales released an emotional video revealing she is undergoing chemotherapy treatment after being diagnosed with the disease earlier this year.

#peter phillips #king charles iii #article

10 notes · View notes

mama-ivy · 14 days

Text

Whumpril 2024

Day 14 - Urgent Care

Jessie's first thought when the news first broke a little over six months ago certainly wasn't that she would be in this position. She’d be lying though, if she said that this exact moment was not the second thought on her mind when she saw the newscast of the outbreak. Her first thought, of course, was the same as everyone else’s – what the actual fuck? And then her second thought was this: I have to find more insulin.

Ever since, she’s been thinking that exact thought over and over. Daily. I have to find more insulin.

She had called the pharmacy first. After waiting on hold for what seemed like an inordinate amount of time, she learned that she was not the only person having a similar fear. The pharmacy technician tried to reassure her that they would stay open as long as possible and supply whatever drugs they had on hand to the patients with long standing prescriptions on file with their facility. But Jessie was not an idiot. They would run out and quickly. Several calls later, she had learned that finding additional insulin was going to become near impossible. Her endocrinologist was giving out whatever samples she had and Jessie was welcome to some if she could make it to the office before some of the other patients. The big-name pharmacies and the manufacturers were handing out samples as well if she could make it there with medical records proving her diabetic status, but some of those places were days away.

So she had devised a plan. She would head to the grocery store first. It was located in a shopping center only two blocks from her house that also contained a vitamin shop. She would grab a little food, sure, but her main goal was the nutrition aisle. When she got there, it was a mad house. A sad little clerk stood confused in the center of the closed down checkout area pointlessly telling anyone who would listen to leave some things for other people. Jessie wasn’t sure why the overly stressed teenage boy was even trying. There were several people on the aisle she needed, but it wasn’t the swarm that some of the other aisles had. She had found an empty hand basket and grabbed as much as she could: Niacin, Vitamin E, Chromium, Glucose. On her way out she had been able to get some canned vegetables, but there wasn’t much else. The vitamin shop was only slightly less crowded, but got some things there also.

After dropping off her treasures in her apartment, she got into her car and drove to the pharmacy and then to the endocrinologist’s office. She had been able to get enough insulin to last about three months. She hoped her electricity would last that long. It didn’t. A week. It had lasted a week.

She packed up her car with her priceless possessions - food, a couple changes of clothes, her medication stash, a pillow and blanket, and a few photographs. If she couldn’t stay home, she’d go north. At least with summer coming, the temperatures would be milder and she may just last longer.

The gas in her car had lasted about 400 miles. She couldn’t see how she was going to get more since every gas station she had passed was dry. She had found an old shopping cart, loaded her things into it and started walking. Her doctor had always encouraged her to get more exercise, although she was sure this wasn’t what she meant.

She stuck to the populated roads. It would take longer sure, but there were more places to stop and more supplies to raid. At first, she saw quite a few people, but after a few weeks, there were fewer and fewer people to meet. She found random items here and there, a pocket knife and a tent, for example, but her main goal was insulin.

I have to find more insulin.

Day 192. I am having trouble catching my breath today. Insulin ran out four days ago. My legs don’t want to work as well and my feet hurt from all the walking. I almost didn’t break down my tent and stayed in my sleeping bag. I haven’t seen anyone or anything for a week. Just the trees. The road signs say that there is a town ahead. Maybe I can find a clinic to restock.

Day 194. My mouth feels like it’s full of cotton. My fingers and toes have swollen and I had trouble getting my boots on. Still no insulin. Still no town. Only the trees. My head is pounding and I started dry heaving. I feel hot all over even though the breezes are almost icy.

Day 195. I found the town. It’s so quiet. Like a ghost town in the old west. I found an urgent care and thankfully, it was open. The medicine stores are empty. It’s cooler in here though, so I’m going to stay a while. My legs hurt so bad. My toes are turning purple from my boots. My head feels like it’s going to explode and every muscle in my body is screaming. I just want to sleep. I’m so tired. And thirsty. And tired. Did I say tired already? I’m also very tired. I'm just going to rest my eyes for a few minutes. I need to find more Insulin.

@whumpril

#whumpril2024 #whumprilday14 #urgentcare #fatal illness #whumpee #swearing #oc

3 notes · View notes

becauseimanicequeen · 5 days

Text

RANDOM THOUGHTS: Manner of Death ep. 14 (rewatch)

(These are my random thoughts from my rewatch on the 31st of March - 1st of April 2024)

Since my rewatches may contain spoilers, I’m putting my random thoughts after the “Read More” link.

I can’t believe this is the last episode. It’s gone by so fast.

Anyway, I’m going into this expecting some assholes to be exposed, some more danger, Inspector M to be okay, many Tan and Bun moments, and a crazy proposal.

See, jealousy really is a cold-hearted bitch.

What is wrong with these characters exposing their secrets and goals to the people who will be the most affected by the repercussions if those secrets come out? I mean, if they didn’t want to kill you before, they definitely do now.

Bun, baby, you don’t have to ask Tan what he wants to be. The answer will always be “Your husband!”

Look at this asshole going for the kid first.

Inspector M is back! Look at him being all hot while fighting Gun (while he’s still injured). And he’s wearing black and blue (my weaknesses). And he’s being salty (my favorite Inspector M flavor). And the way he shoots Gun without even flinching! It’s much more fun to watch him when he isn’t giving me whiplash.

The way That is protecting Sorn! Why are they so fucking adorable?

Bitch, you’ve been fooled. You’ve made your bed, not lie in it. Or, more like, you dug your grave, now lie in it.

I always appreciate a clever tech whizz.

The way Tan and Bun reacted to the tech whizz wondering what Tan was hiding on his computer will never not make me cackle!

This music is giving me Game of Thrones vibes.

Thank every higher power that this tech whizz is smarter than these other two idiots. Yes, Tan and Bun are idiots at times. I still love them, though.

Mass upload that shit and let it spread like wildfire!

I’m so happy that Inspector M was the one who got to arrest the commander.

The realization on the judge’s face when he realized he was fucked was so satisfying to watch. I reveled in every millisecond.

I’m always down for a good revenge. Por getting rid of Rung was sweet.

I’m sure Inspector M and Oat hooked up after Oat helped the inspector. At least they did in my delulu-world. I mean, if we ever get Transplant, they can show us. But, until then, they live happily ever after in my head.

I love that Nam wants to become a doctor. That’s the kind of effect Bun had on her.

Look at That and Sorn being all lovey-dovey. I fucking love them! They should really be wearing helmets when riding that MC, though…

And now the craziest proposal I’ve ever seen. I want to slap Tan for doing this. But I also want to hug him.

And that was the end of Manner of Death. I love this series so much that I’ll come back to it again, and again, and again. And I will always hope for Transplant. So, when are we getting Transplant?

#manner of death #thai ql #thai bl #thai series #my shit #iq random thoughts

3 notes · View notes

la-scree · 4 months

Text

Yua and G'raha: Why They Will Never Be Comrades

Before we get into this bit of Yua’s Lore and why it happens, I will need to bring up some Content Warnings. It’ll be marked within the writing but also I’m just gonna say it here as well:

-Torture and Murder

-Suicide Ideation

-Isolation and Loneliness

I also want to point out that it's okay to like very different characters compared to myself. It's something I have to say because Fandom will Fandom but I'm not gonna be an ass just because you like the ketchup cat. We got enough bullshit in the fandom and I'm not the type to piss in someone else's sandbox. With that said…

You’ve probably heard me go on about how Yua has issues with the Scions’ resident catboy and speak briefly about why she feels that way. While I have my own critical thoughts, they do not go as far as how Yua views him. Not yet anyway but his simps (derogatory) are driving me to the point of hating him so your mileage may vary. You’ve heard me throw things such as ‘gets aggro pinged’ when it comes to their so-called relationship but I never really put into a lot of detail as to why. It’s taken me a long time to put it into words so I hope this goes alright, especially since so many things have changed since I had last written things on this (2021) and now it’s 2024. But before I explain why Yua doesn’t have love for G’raha, I’ll need to talk about some of her time before her arrival in Etheirys and why that part of her life made her the way she is.

A Traveler By Not Her Own Choice and Her Own Mental Struggles

Yua has been going through some intense trauma that hasn’t been addressed in years. To be more specific, she has CPTSD due to her time during Persona 4’s end as well as her time in Synodiporia, a game on Dreamwidth where she was constantly travelling between worlds. Within the True Ending of Persona 4, Yua faced the goddess of Death, Izanami (and her start of somehow always getting involved with Death deities) as Hope’s Representative to show that Humanity can make its own choices. During the fight, each member of the Investigation Team took a hit meant for Yua and as a result, died and got ‘dragged to Yomi’.

Yua watched all her friends get killed and dragged to Hell. That’s not a small trauma, even for a Wild Card and someone still in her teenage years. Moreso because she spent a lot of time with them and grew close to them given her lonely life before Inaba. Yes they got revived but still, that’s a horrible thing to witness! And before that, Adachi fought Yua and was left frozen while he pistol whipped her and did his villain monologue. Think what happened in the original anime but the only difference is Yua managing to break free and stab his hand with a piece of glass. Again, a traumatic moment during her teenage years and seen currently by Yua’s fear of guns.

It gets more intense when she was forced by beings called the Arcana to be a pawn in a game that will determine which would run the universe. And because of this, Yua experienced one of the very worst things that can happen to anyone: murdered then brought back to life constantly.

(CW: Talk of torture, death, isolation, and loneliness)

One of the worlds that Yua visited before the events of Syn happened was called Moebius: a sick and twisted prison the Arcana put the Travellers like her in as a means of punishment for telling a group in the previous world who they were and what they were trying to accomplish: it all depended on which Arcana was involved. The purpose of this jaunt was to make sure everyone dies…and replaced the original people with the Travellers. Or rather ‘overlays’ but nitpicking won’t help right now. And there’s another twist to this: there’s a time limit. If they don’t accomplish their goal, time resets and they would have to do this over and over again.

Some of these loops Yua remembers. Some she doesn’t. One she does was when doctors purposely cut her open as a means of torture with no anesthesia and wide awake, being one of her deaths. Another time was where they cut into her torso, another was other travellers killing her, the list goes on. Every single time, Yua was murdered and the scars quite literally remain. And every time she was killed, the arcana revived her like it was nothing. Like her life didn’t matter. This was the start of Yua’s spiral, changing from the positive girl who would be open to anyone to being closed off and much more harsh. This also led to her feeling isolated from the other travellers, including other versions of the Investigation Team when they did not know she existed. Basically, every single person knew Yua as her male counterparts called Souji Seta or Yu Narukami. There was an exception (sort of) with a version of Adachi, being in the role of the Wild Card where he did meet a girl named Seiki. However, she died in a car accident as a young child.

So there was another version of Yua out there…just dead. You can see why this doesn’t help.

She couldn’t really hold strong friendships or connections except with Adachi (who will be called Herodachi so it differs) and Minako Arisato, the FEMC from Persona 3 Portable. Even with those, the isolation grew strong as Travellers would sometimes get stuck within various spaces specialised to themselves called dungeons. What’s in a dungeon depends on the person and their emotional state. Sometimes calm and other times hectic and dangerous. Typically, someone stuck in a dungeon needs help getting out from others but there are very rare exceptions.

Yua was the only one.

She was stuck in her own personal hell of isolation, loneliness, and making sure she didn’t die to Shadows. She pulled herself out and while on the surface, this sounds heroic and shows how strong and tough she is but it wears on her the more the journey goes on. Others are trapped in their own dungeons and there is always help at the ready, including Yua because that’s how she’s always been: willing to help others, right?

She was always willing to lend a hand to help another in trouble…but no one ever came for her. Yua had to pull herself out of her dungeon not just once but twice. And yet no one came.

She began to feel hollow. Even while talking with others, she started to feel numb. The one who noticed was Herodachi and after speaking to him, he noticed her eyes looking distant, losing their light and life. He knew what was going on. And it was his words that helped pull Yua back from despair. Not completely but a small step:

“Hey…don’t go Empty on me.”

Just like Cylva when explaining about Ardbert’s reaction upon learning who she was, Yua too was shown care and was undone. She broke down into tears and cried as he hugged her. Despite all of this, Yua’s traumas still remained. She cannot sleep without assistance and when she can sleep, there’s usually nightmares. She fears guns and doctors and hospitals by extension, refusing to be seen unless there is a dire emergency. She wants to be able to die without being brought back, having ideation thoughts of suicide and wondering if she’d find peace that way. She starts to look at Hope as a curse but she can’t bring herself to despair because everyone will depend on her. Her counterparts are typically male and the only counterpart who was in fact female is dead. Was she meant to be?

Safe to say that Yua suffers from CPTSD due to this…and G’raha’s actions in Shadowbringers sadly made them much worse. Remember the phrase ‘The road to Hell is paved with Good Intentions’ because that’s what happens and the consequences of these actions end up with him leaving in 5.55.

(End of CW)

Fighting Back Against An Idealised Version

One of the biggest reasons why this will never be is that G’raha cannot take off the rose tinted glasses of idol worship. In the recent lorebook, a passage stated that as the Crystal Exarch, he spread the story of someone called the Warrior of Darkness based on Yua from the memoirs from Edmont de Fortemps and his own biases from when he and her went into the Crystal Tower. Certainly it didn't matter that she threw him into a tent when they officially met because he was playing around and hiding the sand she needed in a den full of ixal. Or that Yua only saw him like a co-worker; someone who was fine and that’s it. His plan was basically to summon Yua to the First, let her hold a ton of tainted Light until the right moment where he can try to be a Big Damn Hero and take all the nasty aether along with himself and die.

In his eyes, Yua Narukami can do no wrong. She is strong, kind, sweet, caring, and cannot do any wrong. To him, she has no problem that she cannot overcome. She’s the Warrior of Light after all, the pinnacle of heroism. To G’raha Tia, Yua is Perfect. And how does his hero take this mindset?

Very badly.

During every single interaction before Rak’tika, Yua acts antagonistic because he keeps trying to change the subject, always hiding something. He acts like he’s apologetic for the Scions’ predicament but Yua refuses to hear it. After all, how could she trust a man who kept her in the dark and refused to show under his cowl? From the get go, Yua refuses to be anything like an ally to him, bringing up during their first Occular meeting that he’s not being nice but rather trying to not fuck up more. When G’raha says that he hopes that there is some form of trust between them after telling her the troubles of the First, Yua wasn’t having it.

"No, I don't trust you at all because you're practically holding people hostage and I got no choice in the matter."

Besides the idol worship, she absolutely hates her ability to make a choice and her bodily autonomy taken away. While yes he does say something along the lines of ‘you don’t have to do this’, there’s no other option. Just the illusion of one.

Yua usually cuts through the bullshit and will say things as she sees them; this is why she never gets involved in politics because she knows she’s bad at them. Any kind of potential idol worship she sees from him, Yua quickly shoots it down until she sees the results of it after Innocence’s fight and G’raha’s attempt at sacrifice. In fact, she managed enough strength to call him a ‘fucking coward’ and that distraction was enough for Emet to use the Gun Spell. The kicker is that moment pissed her off not just because of the idol worship but what his ‘heroic sacrifice’ showed her: a hollow message.

His words meant nothing because Yua attempted to try and understand him after Rak’tika, asking what motivates him but he side stepped her questions. When the ascian Emet-Selch was more upfront with her, Yua trusted him more. Even to the point of falling in love with him despite knowing what will happen. It pained her to kill Emet but she knew it needed to be done because no one else can save the fucking universe it seems.

G’raha’s sacrifice would be hollow to Yua, especially since she has seen several others back in a shadow world stand against a death goddess. And to keep Yua safe, each of them pushed her aside and took the hits meant for her. She watched them get dragged to Yomi and die. The friends she shared meals with, fought alongside with, talked to every day, celebrated festivals with, made a genuine connection with…that caused her pain and made her flashback. And it made her more angry because G’raha basically spat on the memory of her dear friends.

Yua only rescued him because he needed to send the Scions back home but outside of that, she couldn��t give a shit less about him. And why should she after everything he put her through like holding all that tainted Light and messing her body up more, doing things that brought back traumatic memories and triggering her cptsd? Hearing about his time travelling in order to save this timeline and mostly her? Boy howdy was she reminded of those Moebius time loops. She refused to talk to him outside of any Scion meetings because she didn’t want to break down and get triggered every single time, instead trying to take care of herself. But her breaking point and the Point of No Return was after fighting Elidibus in his Warrior of Light form.

You’re Not Meant For This Place. Don’t You Dare Grow Here

When Yua learned what Elidibus was, her plan was to defeat him and make sure he returned to the star and rest. Also because a primal being loose is not a good thing as most know by now. Because of her own circumstances and thoughts on death, she thought it was best. It sounded like it was going to go that way…until G’raha did a Very Big Stupid Thing by announcing that he was going to seal Elidibus in the Crystal Tower and make him power it until he is no more. It’s a Very Big Stupid Thing because to Yua, it’s absolutely cruel to force someone that shouldn’t stay to be used as a battery. Not only that but saying that he was going to trap the ascian made her flashback back to her own trapped life in her dungeon back in Liminal. She refused to let it happen and she tried to stop him but unfortunately, G’raha was quicker and casted Break on her. It lasted long enough for Yua to witness Elidibus being trapped and the one responsible still standing. Well, close enough since the magic ended up costing his body to rapidly turn to crystal. Seeing the horror and pain in Yua’s eyes, he tried to speak up but he only got a look of pure disgust and silence. This was the final straw for her as she felt a deep ache, a familiar gnawing at her soul…a numbness. She had witnessed G’raha Tia at his worst and Yua was not going to answer to him at all. Instead, she turned her back to him, quite literally and left him to turn to crystal all alone. Yua in pain could only think of one thing even in silence:

Suffer.

Yua’s heart grew cold that moment and the Scions noticed quickly when Lyna handed her G’raha’s crystal vessel and asked her to keep it safe on the journey home. Yua in turn responded bluntly and with venom that if she didn’t have a soft spot and cared about Lyna, she’d smash the damn thing. It was looking into Yua’s eyes that made Lyna not say anything, seeing the pain…seeing the light dim. His actions made Yua relive her fears, her worst moments and how could she talk to the Scions about them when they never knew she was from another universe? The only one who had any inkling was Krile and that was more of a forced thing back in Eureka.

Once everyone was back on the Source, Yua simply left G’raha’s crystal vessel to Krile and told her to do what she wished with it. She was going to take no part of what happened next and she was right. She didn’t want to see the face of the man who kept hurting her, even in the name of the greater good. It was bullshit and Yua would have shut herself in her house if it wasn’t for someone she had met while exploring Rabanastre and learning about Ivalice: Misija. Instead of the MSQ during 5.4 and 5.5, Yua was in Bozja helping Misija with understanding her ancestor’s role and to stop Misija’s former legion comrades from taking over. Didn’t mean they cared about the resistance but they had to work with them for their goals. It was during this campaign that Yua became more brutal on the battlefield, including breaking limbs of several Bozjan Resistance members who were nobles due to overhearing them belittle Misija and her origins. The other resistance members feared her but said nothing because this was the Warrior of Light and who knows what would happen if anyone pissed her off. Let’s just say thank god that Yua had both Misija and Estinien in her corner to pull her out of that despair.

It was because of them that Yua finally managed to gather her courage to do two things:

-Tell the Scions that she was Not Okay

-Challenge G’raha to a brawl

That second one is what I’m going to focus on for this since it does involve him. This may have sounded like something Yua shouldn’t do but she realized that using her words wasn’t going to be enough; sometimes you have to beat up a simp hard enough so they have to listen. And that’s what she did, even as he refused at first. But Yua wasn’t going to let him go until they settled things. No, she was going to make sure he sees and hears what she has to say. What happened was constant fighting back and forth with both weapons and words, both of them saying what they felt was right. G’raha tells her that he had no purpose, no hope, and did everything to make sure that the Source and the First wouldn’t fall and kill more people. That his life had no meaning and sacrificing himself would have been the best call. Only for Yua to tell him that she wouldn’t have seen him as such. Heroic sacrifices to her are never heroic nor are they noble; it’s just something to make the person feel good before they become food for the worms. Besides, if she can’t die, he gets no pass to fucking give up because of depression.

After all, she’s had thoughts of wanting to end it all. She’s gone through so many horrors and yet people expect her to grin and bear it. She’s the fucking hero after all, a godsdamned IDOL. Who the hells does this pathetic man think he is?! And she tells him that she will never forgive him for what he’s done to her. She would leave the Scions if it came to it because fuck being in the same space as the man who hurt her and being told to smile and nod and be happy.

No.

Fuck. That.

After this, G’raha does leave the story and stays as a Scion in the field. Yua never sees him again. Although I can’t say the same for other characters but that’s for another time.

I’ve constantly fought with myself since Endwalker’s release to figure out what kind of relationship would Yua and G’raha have. Would I follow canon? Would Yua be able to forgive him? Could they be civil? But the more people asked me about her story and seeing a lot of wolqotds on Twitter about the themes of their WoLs, I kept answering that Yua’s main theme was about Healing. Not really in the physical sense but rather her being able to open up about her traumas, being able to speak about her fears and make connections again like she did as a teenager. There’s no cure to CPTSD but having a good support system might help her in the right direction. I bet some who are reading this might be asking about forgiveness being needed to heal and move on. That in order to love, one needs to let go and forgive the one who wronged them. However, this is Yua’s story and in her case, she doesn’t need it. Forgiveness is earned and it’s not up to the person who wronged her but up to Yua. Being unable to forgive is not an evil thing. She has moved on and is slowly letting go of the pain G’raha caused by being able to talk about it and express her own feelings. She takes what she has learned and tries to do the things like communicate with people about her thoughts and feelings.

Yua feels loved with her group of friends and loves and small family. She felt seen and heard and not given empty reassurances. She didn’t need to forgive someone who has hurt her to move on and feel like a person again. Someone does not need to forgive the people who have hurt them in order to move on and live a better life. Healing also means doing what is best for the person, including self-love and not offering forgiveness. And it’s something Yua is finally able to do.

#ffxiv #ffxiv wol #yua narukami #yua lore #g'raha fucked up big time #g'raha tia #cw: torture mention #cw: murder #cw: isolation #cw: suicidal ideation

2 notes · View notes

alyjojo · 2 months

Text

Love Reading 💖 - March 2024 - Pisces

Singles:

Who is Coming In: 5 Pentacles, King of Wands, Page of Pentacles

Regarding: 3 Pentacles

Long-Term Potential: Page of Wands

This feels more like something you’re entertaining in your head, because they show up as something platonic. A friend, coworker, favorite barista, etc. King of Wands, could be a fire sign, or just someone you find attractive, fun, exciting, they could be the life of the party or class clown energy, they like attention. They’re surrounded with sadness, heartbreak, could’ve just gone through a painful break-up or a difficult situation. You’re a friend to this person, maybe even offering comfort or being supportive to them. Romantic though? You wonder…maybe? Long term potential is no, you two may bring out the inner child in each other, and you have fun together or enjoy talking, but it stops there. Ace of Wands rev clarifies the Page, showing either there’s a lack of attraction, desire, motivation, the spark just isn’t there. Or there could be some flirtation to test the waters but nothing ever comes of it, no action. You two do have great chemistry as friends though.

Messages:

- Facial Hair 🧔‍♂️

- Older Man/Woman

MIRROR 🪞

- Mirroring Each Other

- Self-Reflection

- Introspection

- Inner Wounds

“Choose the path of nope today.”

Signs you may be dealing with:

Fire 🔥 Scorpio, Sagittarius & Pisces

Couples:

Them: Page of Swords, Ace of Pentacles, The Star

Regarding: 4 Pentacles

Okay, they’ve pulled the Narcissist card, but I’m not getting that vibe from them. Maybe, or their behavior may come off as that and you’ve wondered. They are incredibly narrow-minded, selfish, and probably controlling, they think they can tell you what you can and can’t do…maybe with money? I get ego big time, but not cruelty or the mind games that would come with that label. “I am who I am.” Resistant to change, resistant to outside ideas, a stubborn ass that can only see one perspective - theirs, and other people are wrong. Yes? That’s your problem. Well it’s their problem but it’s become your problem because you have goals over here and they’ve been getting in the way of that.

Now I do see some hypocrisy with them. Do as I say, not as I do. They could be someone who travels a lot, whether work or they have family & friends all over that they’re going to see. It’s like when they want something, that’s fine, but when you want to do the same thing, they have an issue. Or there is always money for their needs but not yours. Fk that 💯 It could be they don’t even invite you or ask you to do anything ever, but they’ll go all out for a social occasion, coworkers, something like that. You’ve probably called them out on their shit, and friends they talk to may have done the same thing - unbeknownst to you. They’re seeing the truth of the situation, where before they’ve only seen from their own little place in the world and judged accordingly. It’s a vibe of lacking empathy…jeez I feel like the more we go along here no wonder you think narcissism, if you do. Maybe, I’m not a doctor. Could just be emotionally immature. Whether yes or not, Spirit is validating your experience with that and Selfish both coming out. They may want to buy a car too - not for everyone. Like they can’t take you out but they can afford thousands down on a new car. Their priorities are they/them and what they want. They could be trying to work on it for you though, especially if you’ve called them out or held back from them altogether.

Messages:

- Selfish

- Soothing Presence

THE GOLDEN MIRROR 🪞

- Narcissist

- Love Bombing

- Self-Absorbed

- One-Sided

“Bye-bye, dumbass bullshit.”

You: 7 Wands, Strength, 3 Wands

Regarding: King of Cups

You’re sick of their shit 💯 You feel you have every right to be defensive of this person wasting time, breadcrumbing, giving you excuse after excuse on why they can’t do things, or why you can’t. You may feel held back from people you care about, specifically friends. But they can do it ok 👍 7 Wands shows a competitive vibe as well, feeling like you have to fight off competition, or “compete” for their time possibly. Because in the mutual energy, you’re both busy, so why is it your job to maneuver around this person’s priorities and stuff yours in a drawer? Particularly around money, that seems to be the thing they use against you, or a big one. You’re done 💯 Moving on and away from this, you feel you have every reason to enjoy your life without this person and you’re tired of feeling held back.

Messages:

- Kind 😊

- Moving Out, Moving On

PARTYING 🥳

- Time With Friends

- Having Fun

- Happily Single

- Living in the Moment

“A wise woman once said fuck this shit, and she lived happily ever after.”

Mutual: 8 Pentacles, 2 Pentacles, 2 Swords

Regarding: Page of Wands & Ace of Wands

Both of you are very busy people, you both have goals, dreams, things that excite you and motivate you towards a future you desire. No one has control over the other. You both go back and forth on whether you should talk to each other, expressing anger more than anything. You especially may not have said much out loud, just bailed. That could’ve left this person confused. There’s a lot unsaid and a lot unaddressed, it’s caused confusion on both sides, and stagnation towards improving this connection - if it’s even possible. Would you even want to? You both seem motivated to take action towards something new, new people, relationships, passions, etc. Both of you are changing and growing, and if anything, you could be doing this *in spite of* the other person. 5 Swords at the bottom is like both of you equally being like “fk you” to the other person, and moving on. The oracles here are beautiful, growth, letting past shit go, moving on and feeling alive again. It’s a good thing. I just don’t know if it’s gonna be together or not.

THE BUTTERFLY 🦋

- Evolving & Growth

- Next Phase

- Healing Inner Child

- Releasing the Past

Signs you may be dealing with:

Leo, Capricorn, Aquarius & Scorpio

#Pisces #love tarot reading #march 2024 #love #tarot #tarotblr #singles #couples

1 note · View note

qnewslgbtiqa · 2 months

Text

Doc Q: Rethinking your weight loss goals

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/doc-q-rethinking-your-weight-loss-goals/

Doc Q: Rethinking your weight loss goals

WORDS Dr Rhys Young

Already this year, I’ve seen a wave of folks eager to shed some kilos. It’s that post-New Year’s buzz – you know, the one that makes you think that this is the year you’ll finally start flossing daily.

But just like every other year, February is where most New Year’s resolutions go to die. Instead of getting caught up in the fleeting resolution craze, let’s talk about practical, long-term approaches to losing weight and feeling great if that’s something you want to do.

Ditch the scale

Tired of the scale giving you that judgmental glare, like a homophobic aunt at a Christmas lunch? Ditching the scale doesn’t mean giving up on your goals.

Goals could be to save some money by avoiding takeout, or feeling less breathless when climbing stairs or getting down and dirty.

There’s actually evidence that lifestyle changes are effective in reducing erectile dysfunction, and who doesn’t love a nice stiffy! The queer community has even more pressure when it comes to weight and body shape. Did you know that we are also more likely to experience eating disorders and body dysmorphia?

Sometimes what might feel like a healthy New Year’s resolution, might not actually be so healthy. A good place to start is to spend some time focusing on your health and how you feel, rather than just numbers.

NEAT tricks

Rather than signing a 12-month contract to a gym that you’ll never see the inside of (OK, I may have done this once or twice), I want you to focus on NEAT (Non-Exercise Activity Thermogenesis).

This isn’t about the heat between your thighs while watching Saltburn; it’s about incorporating more activity into our daily routine. Things like getting off the bus a stop early or walking your recently groomed poodle-cross around the block rather than just watching him at the dog park. And yes, you can count sex towards your step count. You’re welcome.

Rainbow plates

I remember as a junior doctor seeing someone in the emergency department after a cucumber had gotten stuck in an orifice it should not have been in. So if there’s one piece of advice I could give everyone, it would be to eat your veggies (and use sex toys designed for purpose).

We know that most Aussies aren’t getting the recommended amount of vegetables. Aiming for five serves of vegetables is easy if you make sure your lunch and dinner are at least 50% veggies. Also, the more colours the better – it’s like having a Pride flag on your plate. Who knew vegetables could be so inclusive?

Foodie Allies

I also want to acknowledge that understanding how to fuel your body can be confusing. You’ve got to juggle supermarket labels, fast food advertising, a new shocking Netflix food documentary every other week, and societal pressures for what healthy bodies are meant to look like.

To make life easier, hook up with a dietitian. For dietary advice, of course – although I hear they’re all pretty good in the sack. A dietitian can help create some realistic & healthy goals and then give advice to put you on the right track.

As 2024 pushes on, let’s remember: our health journey is more than just numbers. It’s about finding joy in being active, loving what we eat, and embracing our unique journey to health. And never forget: that cucumber deserves to be on your plate, not in your butt.

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

0 notes

newstfionline · 3 months

Text

Monday, January 29, 2024

More Renters Than Ever Before Are Burdened by the Rent They Pay (NYT) Half of all renters in the United States spend more than 30 percent of their income on rent and utilities, more than at any other time in history, according to a new report by Harvard’s Joint Center for Housing Studies. The center’s analysis of 2022 census data found that 22.4 million renter households are burdened, with a record 12.1 million spending more than half their income on housing. The surge in housing costs affects a wide swath of renters, from low-income households to higher earners. Middle-income renters earning from $30,000 to $74,999 saw the sharpest rise in cost burden since 2019. And a record number of Americans—653,100—were homeless on a given night in January 2023, the report found. “It’s definitely worse than it’s ever been,” said Cea Weaver, a campaign coordinator at Housing Justice for All in New York. “Middle class people, lower middle class people, working class people, they cannot afford their rent.”

Community health centers serve 1 in 11 Americans. They’re a safety net under stress (AP) Elisa Reyes has come to Plaza del Sol Family Health Center for doctor’s appointments for more than a decade. Though she moved away a while ago, the 33-year-old keeps returning, even if it means a two-hour roundtrip bus ride. That’s because her two children see the same doctor she does. Because when she’s sick, she can walk in without an appointment. Because the staff at the Queens clinic helped her apply for health insurance and food stamps. “I feel at home. They also speak my language,” Reyes said in Spanish. Plaza del Sol is one of nearly 1,400 federally designated community health centers. One in 11 Americans rely on these to get routine medical care, social services and, in some cases, fresh food. The clinics serve as a critical safety net in every state and U.S. territory for low-income people of all ages. But it’s a safety net under stress. Since 2012, community health centers have seen a 45% increase in the number of people seeking care. Many centers are short-staffed and struggling to compete for doctors, mental health professionals, nurses and dentists.

Ecuador police destroy over 20 metric tons of cocaine (Reuters) Ecuadorean Police on Thursday destroyed some 21.5 metric tons of cocaine which they seized over the weekend as part of a military offensive declared by the government to combat organized crime. The drugs were found on Sunday stored in hundreds of blocks in storage space built under a pig farm located in the city of Vinces, officials said.

Argentina's new president says there is 'no Plan B' for the economy. (WSJ) Javier Milei says he is bringing a free-market revolution to the country’s long-troubled economy, cutting thousands of state jobs and slashing regulations on everything from divorce proceedings to the price of milk. But after less than two months at the helm of Latin America’s third-largest economy, the self-described anarcho-capitalist is already facing off against opponents in the streets and in Congress, where some of his overhauls have already been derailed. Its inflation rate is now the world’s highest, surpassing even Venezuela’s. In an interview, Milei said he wouldn’t waver from his campaign promise to shake up the state-controlled economy, despite the acute short-term economic pain it will bring.

U.S. war plans for Ukraine don’t foresee retaking lost territory (Washington Post) Still smarting from last year’s failed counteroffensive in Ukraine, the Biden administration is putting together a new strategy that will de-emphasize winning back territory and focus instead on helping Ukraine fend off new Russian advances while moving toward a long-term goal of strengthening its fighting force and economy. The emerging plan is a sharp change from last year, when the U.S. and allied militaries rushed training and sophisticated equipment to Kyiv in hopes that it could quickly push back Russian forces occupying eastern and southern Ukraine. That effort foundered, largely on Russia’s heavily fortified minefields and front-line trenches. The U.S. planning is part of a multilateral effort by nearly three dozen countries backing Ukraine to pledge long-term security and economic support—both out of necessity, given the disappointing results of last year’s counteroffensive and the conviction that a similar effort this year would likely bring the same outcome, and as a demonstration of enduring resolve to Russian President Vladimir Putin.

Ukraine says corrupt officials stole $40 million meant to buy arms for the war with Russia (AP) Employees from a Ukrainian arms firm conspired with defense ministry officials to embezzle almost $40 million earmarked to buy 100,000 mortar shells for the war with Russia, Ukraine’s security service reported. The SBU said late Saturday that five people have been charged, with one person detained while trying to cross the Ukrainian border. If found guilty, they face up to 12 years in prison. The investigation comes as Kyiv attempts to clamp down on corruption in a bid to speed up its membership in the European Union and NATO. Officials from both blocs have demanded widespread anti-graft reforms before Kyiv can join them.

What It Took Young People in China to Get Their Jobs (NYT) They knew the job market would be tough. None were prepared for just how tough it proved to be. China’s economy is struggling through a sustained slowdown, with real estate developers mired in debt, families fearful of spending and entrepreneurs hesitating to take risks. Joblessness levels among young people have hit record highs. We spoke to young Chinese about what it took to find their jobs amid such uncertainty. They described moving home with their parents, exhausting their savings, taking on unpaid internships or working two jobs. They also spoke of a generational disillusionment. Born in the headiest years of China’s economic boom, they grew up with more opportunities and more comforts than their parents—and also higher expectations. They were told that, with hard work and the right education, their futures were all but guaranteed. Now, those boom years are fading, as are many young people’s hopes—with unpredictable consequences for China and the world.

China is absorbing Hong Kong, as geography follows politics (Washington Post) The Sham Chun River and adjoining wetlands, which separate Hong Kong from the Chinese city of Shenzhen, have throughout modern history served as a physical marker of the differences between the two territories and their distinct systems. The river still flows, broad and slow, but the boundary it represented is dissolving. Two mammoth multibillion-dollar development projects backed by the Hong Kong and Chinese governments—including one that will straddle the banks of the river—will change the look, feel and economic pulse of Hong Kong, with one goal in mind: integration with mainland China. Over the next decade, new rail links, bridges, logistics facilities, schools, office buildings and residential towers will transform Hong Kong’s outer fringes and remake the quiet towns and wetlands of the New Territories into an extension of Shenzhen, a Chinese technology hub. New projects will bring Hong Kong fully into the “Greater Bay Area”—Chinese President Xi Jinping’s vision of linking nine Chinese coastal cities with Hong Kong and Macao, the former Portuguese colony, as a rival to Silicon Valley.

U.S. troops killed, wounded in Jordan attack blamed on Iranian proxies (Washington Post) A militant drone attack killed three U.S. service members and injured at least 34 in Jordan on Sunday, officials said, marking the first deadly military action against American service members since the war in Gaza triggered a steep rise in violence across the Middle East. The deadly attack targeted a facility known as Tower 22 in northeast Jordan, close to where the borders of Syria, Iraq and Jordan converge. A U.S. defense official said the one-way drone struck the base’s living quarters, causing injuries that ranged from cuts and bruises to brain trauma. About 350 troops are stationed at the base. President Biden blamed the assault on groups supported by Iran, generating immediate questions about when, where and how forcefully the United States might respond.

Negotiators Close In on Hostage Deal That Would Halt Fighting in Gaza for Weeks (NY) American-led negotiators are edging closer to an agreement in which Israel would suspend its war in Gaza for about two months in exchange for the release of more than 100 hostages still held by Hamas, a deal that could be sealed in the next two weeks and would transform the conflict consuming the region. Negotiators have developed a written draft agreement merging proposals offered by Israel and Hamas in the last 10 days into a basic framework that will be the subject of talks in Paris. While there are still important disagreements to be worked out, negotiators are cautiously optimistic. The hostages have been in captivity since Oct. 7, when Hamas gunmen stormed into Israel and killed an estimated 1,200 people and seized about 240 more in the worst terrorist attack in the country’s history. Israel’s military retaliation since then has killed more than 25,000 people, most of them women and children.

Where Is Hamas Getting Its Weapons? Increasingly, From Israel. (NY) Israeli military and intelligence officials have concluded that a significant number of weapons used by Hamas in the Oct. 7 attacks and in the war in Gaza came from an unlikely source: the Israeli military itself. For years, analysts have pointed to underground smuggling routes to explain how Hamas stayed so heavily armed despite an Israeli military blockade of the Gaza Strip. But recent intelligence has shown the extent to which Hamas has been able to build many of its rockets and anti-tank weaponry out of the thousands of munitions that failed to detonate when Israel lobbed them into Gaza, according to weapons experts and Israeli and Western intelligence officials. Hamas is also arming its fighters with weapons stolen from Israeli military bases. What is clear now is that the very weapons that Israeli forces have used to enforce a blockade of Gaza over the past 17 years are now being used against them. Israeli and American military explosives have enabled Hamas to shower Israel with rockets and, for the first time, penetrate Israeli towns from Gaza.

Houthi attacks in the Red Sea are idling car factories and delaying new fashion (AP) Car factories have idled in Belgium and Germany. Spring fashion lines are delayed at a popular British department store. A Maryland company that makes hospital supplies doesn’t know when to expect parts from Asia. Attacks on ships in the Red Sea are delivering another shock to global trade, coming on top of pandemic-related logjams at ports and Russia’s invasion of Ukraine. Houthi rebels in Yemen, seeking to stop Israel’s offensive against Hamas in Gaza, are attacking cargo ships plying the waters connecting Asia with Europe and the United States, forcing traffic away from the Suez Canal and around the tip of Africa. The disruption is causing delays and driving up costs. “What’s happened right now is short-term chaos, and chaos leads to increased costs,” said Ryan Petersen, CEO of the supply chain management company Flexport. “Every ship that gets rerouted has 10,000 containers on it.”

#headlines #news

0 notes

ghostlytravelerprince · 4 months

Text

01/07/24

Dear Diary,

I have been hit by inspiration, as usual, from where I least expected it. When I said this was my “bittersweet” era, I was naive to the amount of negative emotions I’d have to work through.

I feel fear and shame and danger because I’m sensing that my coworkers are cruel people — not evil, since it’s obvious they’re in a lot of pain — but still cruel. I feel ashamed that I entered the world of healthcare bright-eyed, believing the people there were as deeply empathetic as I. They’ve been chewed up and spit out by a system to the point where they devalue human suffering, and this deeply contradicts with some of my most core beliefs. I entered this profession not to emotionally distance myself from death but to fully envelop myself in it.

I now recognize that my peace can only be kept by, ironically, walling myself off from the people I wanted to be open to, while keeping my heart open to my patients. I am my patients’ advocate, not my coworkers’. I’m going to have to be uncharacteristically cold and distant from these people, which is okay because I find joy in the work itself, even if the people I work with hurt me and reject me as a freak. I know they’ve clocked me, they can tell there’s something different about me like all the mean people of the world can.

Except for this one resident — a psych resident. I need to know his name, and I need to talk to him. He’s shown good flags — a willingness to speak to people of lesser status than him as equals, an openness to rejecting his status as a doctor altogether, and a desire to thank others for their hard work. He’s the first I’ve seen like this (perhaps because he’s not in emergency medicine), and I need to talk to him about it. He has really kind eyes.

But, I was so excited for this job in healthcare. Now I’m not even past orientation, and I already know this isn’t the place for me! I have a minimum of twelve months more here, so I’m going to have to be tougher and stronger than before. I’m going to distance myself from my work, and get my lifeline from my friends — this is an utterly new concept to me, since I’m committed to passion in work. But, I can see that what I enjoyed most about learning medicine was the process of learning new things and trying to push my mental boundaries. I know now that I will never go to medical school because the American healthcare system is antithetical to the actual beauty of medicine.

My goal for 2024 is to use these next months to develop discipline in a difficult environment with difficult people, and to save money for the future. I need this job to get me a laboratory position because I see now that I must be a scientist. I love caring for people, and I hunger for knowledge to change the world for the better. I will prepare myself for a PhD — in what, I do not know yet. But, I at least have learned that I will not do an MD. Already, a very successful start to my new year, even if it was born from fear and shame and childhood wounds.

When I go to work, I feel so lesser. People only need me for what I can do, in a way that makes me feel like an automaton. I’m forgotten about as soon as I leave a room, or I know they’re definitely talking about me negatively (because that’s how they talk about everyone behind their backs). They don’t acknowledge me when we’re the only ones in a room — I’m always the first one to say hello. But, he remembered such a minuscule thing I did for him yesterday. How could I have forgotten how nice it feels to be seen as an equal?

I’ve never said “I’m sorry” so much in my life because I’m falling into fawning behaviors. I’m so scared of these people’s cruelty. In 2024, I will have learned the Grey Rock mentality, and I will have learned how to guard my peace. I should have trusted Amber’s advice from the beginning.

I will say, firefighters are better people. They are solid in character, and I enjoy my time with them. They’re just a bit too conservative for my taste, and I need something more cerebral. The people in healthcare — like the stereotypes suggest — are mainly to be avoided and stonewalled, except for a few rare angels.

In 2024, I will have spent time working in a lab, preparing to apply to graduate school (perhaps a GRE?), and choosing a science of my own. I will become a scientist in Antarctica. I’ve always been talking about wanting to go. Antarctica and storm chasing will not be an “I wish”, but instead a firm reality. Maybe one day I’ll become a scientist in space. I’ll remain noble in science, like my dad. I’ll spend plenty of time with my friends, and I’ll reach out to others when my cup is leaking. Learning that, in my search for novelty, sometimes the best key to the next adventure comes from hunkering down with what you already have supporting you, instead of a flighty wandering to something new, something better. Sometimes you can find a new path towards exploration within things already familiar to you. Instead of looking for new friends, I’ll find strength in the friends I have that I know to be good. This will further me closer to my goals than any gamble on a coworker could. Capitalism makes humanity inherently difficult within that system.

So far, the data I’ve collected is this: I enjoy a job where I am busy all of the time, and where I’m on my feet. The labor does not have to be intensely physical, but I cannot stand to sit at a desk staring at a screen all day.

I also prefer to be outside, or at least interfacing with nature in some capacity.

I also prefer high stress, high octane environments. I thrive off of “life or death” situations.

There needs to be a cerebral aspect to the job — continuous learning and curiosity and humanity, not just being an automaton. Novelty and exploration are important to me.

There needs to be a tangible good produced by the labor. If I am going to give so many hours of my finite life to something, I want it to mean something to me.

There needs to be kind people, and stereotypes are typically true, unfortunately. The things people say about those working business, or HR, or healthcare spring from a place of truth. Find groups stereotyped as kind, like librarians or gardeners or volunteers. Astronauts.

Happy belated New Year’s Resolution!! 🎉

0 notes

sarah-dipitous · 4 months

Text

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 SURPRISE ROUND

The Church on Ruby Road

Surprise, bitch. Bet you thought you’d seen the last of me. Since I technically started in 2022, why not actually end in 2024?? (Honestly, I just did not account for a Christmas Special for Doctor Who. They’ve been a bit weird on those the past few seasons. But to be fair to me, my goal was only to the 60th anniversary specials so it’s not incomplete)

“The Church on Ruby Road”

Plot Description: Ruby Sunday collides with a man called the Doctor—and her life will never be the same

Girl, protect that child from the elements better if you’re going to abandon her like that, geez

Man, I thought it was just Moffat who wanted the Doctor to meet his new companion as a child all the time…but this one’s a BABY! (I’m trying not to pass too much judgement. He could have met Ruby as an adult and then traveled back in time to find the mother who left her on the steps of a church)

Oh, is she on one of those “who are your ancestors?” shows??

I’m not saying I LIKE whatever little aliens are causing mischief on this set, but I don’t DISLIKE them

This Christmas party scene, just how crowded it is, is making me nauseated a little

He’s over 1000 years old and yes, he SHOULD be in this club having an excellent time

Did David Tennant’s second go at the Doctor heal so that Ncuti didn’t have to just sulk in the TARDIS in all his free time?

I know this probably won’t be his official Doctor outfit but it should be. The kilt, the tank top, the leather jacket, the jewelry…love it all!

I no longer like these aliens. They’re just terrorizing Ruby

Kind of obsessed with this group of women: Ruby, her adoptive mother, her adoptive mother’s mother (maybe?), and this woman partly in charge of placing foster kids….because this is a family show, of course everything is best case scenario across the board

Whyyyyyy couldn’t this woman wait til AFTER Christmas to break this news to Ruby??? It’s also her BIRTHDAY!!! There’s no trace of either of Ruby’s birth parents, and you break that to her NOW??

The worst part about this woman blaming all her bad luck on meeting Ruby is that she’s partly right. It’s PARTLY right, but it’s not Ruby’s fault

Oh nooooo, the baby!! The aliens took the baby!! The one thing she wasn’t supposed to lose!!

I’m already obsessed with these two. I don’t know if I ship them or if I just like their chemistry together but there was an instant spark in the club and it’s only gotten better now that he thinks she’s crazy for jumping on the ladder from the aliens’ ship

Omg they really haven’t fixed Isaac Newton. He just called gravity mavity

His indignation at the goblins being called time travelers lmaooo. “Excuse me? They are not time travelers. Time travelers are great, like the best, like wow. These lot are just bimble” Helloooo?? I want him to dish all the hot goss about his long hot summer with Houdini

How does this wooden spaceship work?? I’m guessing it’s a spaceship because it still somehow needs ventilation shafts

Omg he really does have blue hair and pronouns, I’m liking this a lot

I FORGOT I DID HEAR THERE WAS A MUSICAL NUMBER FOR SOME REASON. Maybe we didn’t need that…

The Doctor flirting with Ruby’s grandma is actually quite sweet

No no noooo, this is such a nice flat. Don’t break ittttttt

HOW DID THEY TAKE RUBYYYY?? She was right there!! Omg. Not only did they take Ruby, they erased her from Carla’s memory. Whyyyy are the cracks closing up???

How do we get her back?????? This place is utterly depressingggg. Oh good, they can’t erase her, they just went back in the timeline and took her from the day she was left at the church, her BIRTHday. Time travel, we can do

Oh interesting they we’re not gonna get a Ruby’s birth mom reveal. I kind of like that…like, what would it actually do for Ruby’s character this early on? But also, it IS important for the Doctor to be able to let that go since he was also abandoned as a child and adopted

I love that everyone is so charmed by Fifteen. It’s INCREDIBLY easy to be

Are we going to get a proper return to form at least for New Who where the companion is full time? She doesn’t have a job

Ok but who is this neighbor?? Why does she know what a TARDIS is?!

#hellsite nostalgia tour 2023

1 note · View note

needloveandpositivity · 3 years

Text

It's been described as the worst year of my life packed into 3 or 4 months. And it has been. 2020 was so good for us. We grew closer in our relationship. I knew quarantine was either going to make or break us, and we are doing so well together. I love him with all my heart. But there's so much going on, I'm so exhausted.

We became really close with his aunt and uncle over the summer. We visited often, they came to visit here, it was a good relationship. His aunt became a confidant for me. We could talk about anything. Then his uncle decided to fuck off. Left with no warning. They had 1 fight and he was gone. Aunt was heart broken. My man went to pick up uncle, because my man has a huge heart. It felt like we got shoved in the middle of their separation. Aunt vented to me often about uncle. Trashing him left right and center. I didn't really like him in the first place, but he's family, I gotta tolerate him. But it's so hard to stay neutral. Not even a week after he left, he started seeing another woman. A woman who he had already cheated on aunt with in the past.

I did my best to keep aunts head level, so she wouldn't call, text, email, what ever this lady to try and ruin uncles set up he had. She was so angry. So bitter. And I understood 100%, I think her feelings were justified. He left her. Again. 3rd time he walked out on her because she was trying to help him sort himself out.

My birthday, I get a text message, my man's great aunt had passed away. The woman that uncle was living with passed away suddenly in her sleep. She wasn't a super healthy woman, I understand she had cancer and diabetes, she had basically given up. But she seemed to be doing well, all things considered. We had just seen her the weekend before, she was happy, joking with us. And suddenly, gone. In a text message. We went to see my family that weekend, my dad and my brothers birthdays are all around mine as well, so we were going to celebrate together. I let my parents know, my man's great aunt has passed away quite suddenly. No response. No, "I'm sorry for your loss" no "wow that's terrible, my condolences" nothing. Just oh, yeah I overheard your man say it to his mom earlier. Thanks.

I had 3 weeks off work between contracts. I tried to use that time to organize the apartment, sort things to sell/give away, but Toronto was shutting down again for lock down, so I couldn't really do much with the things I didn't want anymore. So I'm still sitting on those boxes.

The 3rd week, my man's mom came to visit for a few days, which was nice. Her and I get along really well. We went to pet smart, went for a walk, hung out, it was nice. But she left in the middle of the night, no text, no explanation. Just gone. I woke up the next morning looking for her, assuming she went out to smoke, and I couldn't find her. She must have noticed I was active on Facebook, because she messaged me like 20 minutes later, said her gut told her to go home, so she did. At like 3am.

Like a week or 2 later she starts getting all distant, hardly responding to me, not giving me solid answers about Christmas plans, just keeps saying what ever. I asked her if something was wrong and she just kept saying no. It was like this for like a week or two and she just kept getting more and more snippy with me. So I finally asked my man like is your mom mad at me or something. But he's like no no she's fine she loves you why would she be mad at you, what could you possibly have done? And that's what I was wondering too, like, what can I do? What have I done?

Finally, she tells my man that she was upset with me, she thought I didn't want to see her on Christmas. That she was just an after thought. Because I offered to see her all day on December 26th. She took offense to December 26th because in her mind, December 26th is the left over day. The day that people who don't matter get. In my family, December 25 and December 26 hold the same value. We always switched back and forth with my moms family and my dads family for Christmas day and boxing day. This Christmas, with the covid rules and everything, my dads family was going to visit on the 27th, just a few of them, and mom's side was going to do Christmas day, since it was their turn anyways. So the 26th was completely free, and I wanted to give MIL our undivided attention. No rushing to another dinner, she gets the day. But she didn't want that. She wanted Christmas day. But she wouldn't communicate that to me so that we could arrange that for her.. so she thought I didn't want to see her. That she didn't matter. And she got all angry and distant about it without just telling me.

We finally got it sorted out, Christmas was super messy, my moms parents were being over the top about Christmas plans, they ended up canceling everything, and we ended up being able to see MIL on Christmas day after all. The whole time we were down there, I was anxious and uncomfortable. Trying to please everybody at the same time, and it was never enough. Nobody was ever satisfied by the time we could or could not spend with them.

Then, the 27th in the evening we had Christmas with my man's dad. Uncle was there. With this new woman. No heads up, we just walked in, and there she is. No introduction or nothing. Just hey welcome to Christmas dinner, have a seat. Like what? He knew we still spoke with aunt. He knew how heart broken she was. And now flaunting this new girlfriend at us???? I felt completely disrespected. Like he did it to get a rise out of me. Like he did it so that I would tell aunt and put fuel on the fire. He did it to make it hurt for us to tell aunt.

I was so excited to finally go home.

January 4th. One of the worst days of my life. I'm working from home, any normal day. And I get a text message from my best friends son. My best friend has tragically died of a stroke this weekend. I can feel my soul being torn to shreds. I screamed and cried for hours. I was able to calm myself just long enough to send an email to my boss, let him know what happened and i will be signed off for the rest of the day. My mom gave me a call as soon as she found out, one of her friends found out because she used to work with my best friend. She called me, and immediately she knew that I knew. I told her who told me, and I sobbed. She didn't stay on the line for very long. Just told me that if all I'm going to do is sit there and cry, then she's going to go because she had things to do. I wanted to tell her to fuck off right then and there. But I just said k and hung up. I called my man so he knew I wasn't working, that I wasn't okay. He hurried home that afternoon.

January was a rough, rough month. I felt right on the edge of crying every single day. I couldn't make phone calls without bursting into tears. I spent so much time just staring at the wall. I smoked so much weed just so I could get through an hour without crying. My eyes, my nose, my throat, my soul hurt just existing. Weed gave me that temporary relief.

Just when I started pulling myself together, making it through a day without sobbing, my dad texts me. My great aunt has passed away. At this point, I don't feel anything anymore. I don't want to cry, I don't want to feel. I'm just angry all the time. It's either nothing, or angry. There's no in between.

February I start to realize I'm really not okay. And I haven't actually been okay for a while. I haven't done laundry properly since well before Christmas. The apartment is a mess. And more and more often I'm thinking about walking out into the street just to hope someone will run me over. Then maybe someone will notice and understand how very not okay I am. Maybe I'll die? Is that really the worst thing that could happen?

I finally called my doctor when I started having some really physical symptoms. Thinking about my best friend, thinking about aunt and uncle fighting, thinking about MIL, thinking about anything remotely stressful or disappointing would make me shake. Like an uncontrollable shiver starting deep in my chest. Come to find out that's called heart palpitations. I've also been having these attacks, Ill be sitting on the couch, or fucking sleeping, and I'll wake up with a pain in my lower abdomen, super dizzy, nauseous, light headed. I sit in the bathroom and wait to either throw up, or pass out. Neither happen, and after about 20 minutes it subsides, I'm exhausted and I go back to sleep. My heart rate gets so high, so consistently during this time that my fitbit has started recording it as exercise.

I'm scared, obviously, that something might be seriously wrong with me. The nurse that I speak to on the phone doesn't think there's anything to worry about. She says it's just anxiety, she will book me in next week to be put on medication. At this point I'm not entirely convinced it's "just anxiety", so I made an appointment with a counselor. Even if it is "just anxiety" this is far more intense than i have EVER experienced in my life, and I've been diagnosed with anxiety/depression since I was like 13.

My mom doesn't care. I told her what was happening and she just said, I'm sure you're fine. I am super duper absolutely not fine. I haven't thought about dying in YEARS. The last time I thought about it was when I told my parents I was bi and my mom tried to leave. Went upstairs, packed a bag, and walked out the door. My dad chased her down and got her to come back in but like, what the fuck.

I'm almost 1 week on trintellix, I have to get bloodwork done this week to make sure these fun, awesome, never before seen symptoms are in fact just anxiety, and I see the cousellor next week to hopefully figure out what's going on and how to get through this.

I have plans, goals. My man and I are talking about getting married in 2022. Talking about buying a home in 2024. Children? Maybe. But I'd like to be around here to meet them.

So, here I am. I have people who listen, but I feel like I just rant at one friend way too much, and she's sick of me. Another friend that changes the subject when I get sad. Another who has told me she's sick of people venting to her, because she has her own mental health to deal with. And my man doesn't know how to help me. He tries, he really does. But he has bad days too, and I cannot help him while I'm down here. I can't pick him up while I'm still down.

I just need someone to listen. Someone to hear me rant and vent and get things off my chest. Because if I don't, I know I'm going to drown down here.

If you're willing and able to reach out, please do. If not, this will be the blog that I journal in, I guess. Where I write down everything that I want to talk to my best friend about. I know she can't respond, but I'm sure she's up there watching me, and I hope she's reading this to know that I'm trying. I'm getting help. I'm trying to get better, so I can do better.

#help #helpless #mentalwellness #mental heath support #anxitey #depression #depressing shit #im not ok im not ok im not ok #pls help #grief #reaching out #journal #recovery

2 notes · View notes

nannyfeline · 4 years

Photo

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Essential (to me) Episodes (+Garak)

I’m starting a rewatch of Deep Space Nine, but I’ve already seen it all the way through three times, so this time I’m focusing on just the “essential” episodes (plus the Garak-heavy ones).

This is a consolidated list of the episodes I’m watching so I don’t have to keep cross-referencing six other lists whenever I go to choose the next episode to watch. I’m putting this here for me to use, feel free to use it as a guide if you like or ignore it completely.

Season 1

Episodes 1 and 2 – Emissary: The first episode.

Episode 3 – Past Prologue: Bajoran terrorists are a thing. Garak is introduced. He makes a pass at Bashir.

Episode 13 – Battle Lines: Space pope goes to space.

Episode 19 – Duet: Cardassians and Bajorans (but not Garak).

Episode 20 – In the Hands of Prophets: Nurse Ratched is Vedek Winn and she bad.

Season 2

Episodes 1, 2, and 3: The show becomes reasonably good. There’s an attempted coup on Bajor, and the station is “abandoned.”

Episode 5 – Cardassians: Sets up some Cardassian background and has lots of Garak. Also Bashir.

Episode 7 – Rules of Acquisition: I mean, I guess. The Dominion gets mentioned, so sure, whatever.

Episode 14 – Whispers: O’Brien thinks everyone has been replaced by pod people.

Episode 18 – Profit and Loss: Quark, Cardassians, and Garak.

Episodes 20 and 21 – The Maquis: Yeah, sure. It sets them up. They’re important in other series.

Episode 22 – The Wire: GARAK! AND BASHIR!

Episode 26 – The Jem’Hadar: They’re important.

Season 3

Episodes 1 and 2 – The Search: Dominion stuff. Eddington is introduced.

Episode 3 – The House of Quark: Quark and a Klingon get married.

Episode 5 – Second Skin: Cardassians gaslight Kira.

Episode 7 – Civil Defense: Those old Cardassian safety measures on Terok Nor sure are tricky.

Episode 9 – Defiant: Riker and the Maquis. Or is it???

Episodes 11 and 12 – Past Tense: Sisko, Dax, and Bashir are transported back in time to approximately right now (2024, actually), and things are basically fucked but honestly not that different than real life in 2020. (In 1995, it seemed like we would never get to this point. 25 years later, and boy were we wrong. This one is important for understanding some memes, but it honestly may be depressing and triggering here in the summer of 2020.)

Episode 15 – Destiny: Sisko being the Emissary and also talking to Cardassians.

Episode 16 – Prophet Motive: This may be my imagination, but it looks like there could be foreshadowing for “Doctor Bashir, I Presume.” I don’t know, I haven’t rewatched it, yet. I honestly doubt they were thinking that far ahead. I’ll update after I’ve seen it.

Episode 18 – Distant Voices: Bashir is under telepathic attack. Reddit says it’s a good Garak ep.

Episodes 20 and 21 – Improbable Cause and The Die is Cast: Snap, Garak is doing some shady shit. It’s a tough watch if you want to keep Garak in the good guy column. Cardassians attack the Dominion.

Episode 22 – Explorers: Could be more “Doctor Bashir, I Presume” foreshadowing, but probably not. I’ll see.

Episode 26 – The Adversary: Founder infiltrates the Defiant.

Season 4

Episodes 1 and 2 – The Way of the Warrior: Klingons go to war and Worf joins the cast.

Episode 4 – Hippocratic Oath: Bashir’s such a grown up now! Love it! Making big boy choices wrt the Jem’Hadar.

Episode 5 – Indiscretion: Okay, sure, I mean, if you’ve never seen the show, I guess this one is important. It introduces Ziyal. She’s a terrible character, but whatever.

Episode 7 – Starship Down: Fighting the Dominion.

Episode 8 – Little Green Men: THIS IS THE BEST EPISODE! Quark, Rom, and Nog are transported back to 1947 Roswell, New Mexico, and this is the episode that makes me also sort of ship Quark/Odo.

Episode 10 – Our Man Bashir: Bashir and Garak are playing a 1960s James Bond holonovel and have to save the crew when a transporter accident causes their patterns to become integrated with the program. It’s dumb and fun.

Episodes 11 and 12 – Homefront and Paradise Lost: Starfleet violating civil rights a bit to root out Changelings.

Episode 14 – Return to Grace: Cardassians gonna Cardass, I guess.

Episode 22 – For the Cause: Garak and Ziyal become friends.

Episode 23 – To the Death: Sisko and the Dominion work together for a common goal. And we get WEYOUN!

Episode 25 – Body Parts: Quark thinks he’s going to die, so he starts selling off his body parts. Reddit says it’s a good Garak ep, though.

Episode 26 – Broken Link: Odo needs the Founders, uh-oh.

Season 5

Episode 1 – Apocalypse Rising: Whoops, there’s a Klingon Changeling, now.

Episode 6 – Trials and Tribble-ations: Set during TOS “The Trouble with Tribbles.”

Episode 8 – Things Past: Several of the kids, including Garak, are astral projecting to the Cardassian occupation.

Episode 9 – The Ascent: I don’t know, Odo and Quark are hanging out, I guess?

Episode 13 – For the Uniform: Eddington is back.

Episodes 14 and 15 – In Purgatory’s Shadow and By Inferno’s Light: The Dominion’s a’comin’.

Episode 16 – Doctor Bashir, I Presume: Julian’s secret’s out. (My favorite Bashir/O’Brien interaction is in this episode.)

Episode 24 – Empok Nor: O’Brien, Nog, and Garak are scavenging on Empok Nor, sister station of Terok Nor. Spoopy.

Episode 25 – In the Cards: A dumb Jake/Nog fetch quest episode, but Kai Winn meets Weyoun, so… 🤷‍♂️

Episode 26 – Call to Arms: Okay, there’s definitely a war on now.

Season 6

Episode 1 – A Time to Stand: They a’fightin’.

Episode 2 – Rocks and Shoals: Hey, look, the kids are stranded with some Jem’Hadar.

Episode 4 – Behind the Lines: Occupied DS9.

Episodes 5 and 6: Favor the Bold and Sacrifice of Angels: Retaking DS9.

Episode 11 – Waltz: Now Sisko and Dukat are stranded.

Episode 18 – Inquisition: Bashir is accused of being a spy, because why not. Section 31 is introduced.

Episode 19 – In the Pale Moonlight: Lol Sisko is a fascist. Garak helps.

Episode 26 – Tears of the Prophets: The Federation goes on offense.

Season 7

Episode 1 – Image in the Sand: Things just keep going, you know?

Episode 2 – Shadows and Symbols: I’m going to give this one a miss, personally, but it introduces Ezri.

Episode 3 – Afterimage: Poor Garak.

Episode 6 – Treachery, Faith, and the Great River: Weyouns Weyouning.

Episode 8 – The Siege of AR-558: Fightin’.

Episode 9 – Covenant: Dukat is bonkers.

Episode 16 – Inter Arma Enim Silent Leges: Bashir and Section 31.

Episodes 17 through 19: Probably should watch these. Beginning of the end.

Episodes 20 through 24: Getting there.

Episodes 25 and 26 – What You Leave Behind: The finale.

#deep space 9 #ds9 #star trek #deep space nine #garak #(garashir if you squint)

16 notes · View notes

livinginlandmarketing · 3 years

Link

When Armando Navarro applied for UC Riverside’s medical school in 2017, he knew there was a lack of Spanish-speaking doctors — even in the diverse, Latino-heavy Inland Empire.

“When I got to UCR, for the first time I was seeing professionals succeeding in medicine who looked like me. That’s something I want to give back to future generations,” said Navarro, a 28-year-old from Southgate. “As a doctor, I want to be an entryway for families, who sometimes come in with limited knowledge or resources, to begin to understand their health. I see patients as my family members.”

Navarro’s school, the UC Riverside School of Medicine, aims to bridge the gap between Inland immigrant communities and quality health care. With help from a new endowment, the 8-year-old medical school hopes to diversify the local workforce by educating more minority students so they can become physicians.

A four-year, $450,000 grant from The California Wellness Foundation will help “build a new generation of diverse healthcare workers, by enabling underrepresented minority students to pursue careers in health professions,” a UCR news release states.

The Inland Empire is a “medically-underserved region,” UCR officials said. There are about 35 primary-care physicians per 100,000 people, compared to 70 or more per 100,000 people in other parts of California, the school reported.

UC Riverside medical students Crystal Witherspoon, 27, left, and Armando Navarro, 28, are seen on campus Friday, July 9, 2021. (Photo by Watchara Phomicinda, The Press-Enterprise/SCNG)

UC Riverside medical student Crystal Witherspoon, 27, seen Friday, July 9, 2021, wants to go into primary care or obstetrics and gynecology to help women in the Inland Empire. (Photo by Watchara Phomicinda, The Press-Enterprise/SCNG)

UC Riverside medical student Armando Navarro, 28, seen on campus Friday, July 9, 2021, hopes to stay in Southern California to help people with limited access to healthcare. (Photo by Watchara Phomicinda, The Press-Enterprise/SCNG)

UC Riverside medical students Crystal Witherspoon, 27, left, and Armando Navarro, 28, walk across campus Friday, July 9, 2021. (Photo by Watchara Phomicinda, The Press-Enterprise/SCNG)

UC Riverside medical student Armando Navarro, 28, seen on campus Friday, July 9, 2021, hopes to use his Spanish-speaking skills as a physician. (Photo by Watchara Phomicinda, The Press-Enterprise/SCNG)

UC Riverside medical students Crystal Witherspoon, 27, right, and Armando Navarro, 28, stand in front of the Orbach Science Library on campus Friday, July 9, 2021. The school has won a four-year, $450,000 grant from The California Wellness Foundation to diversify its enrollment. (Photo by Watchara Phomicinda, The Press-Enterprise/SCNG)

Show Caption

Expand

At UCR, minorities represent about half of the students enrolled in medical school classes each year, officials said. Of the 78 students set to graduate in the Class of 2024, 50% identify as “underrepresented minority students” — Black, Native American, Latino, Native Hawaiian or Pacific Islander students.

Dr. Deborah Deas, vice chancellor for health sciences and dean of UCR’s School of Medicine, said in the release that the grant will support operating expenses and enhance efforts to “recruit, train and graduate students from underrepresented communities.”

Dr. Emma Simmons, senior associate dean of student affairs in the School of Medicine, said the dollars will also be used to expand training opportunities and student-to-health professional pipeline programs. One such program is the Medical Scholars Program, which is tailored to undergraduate students with financial need who are preparing for careers in health or the biomedical sciences.

UC Riverside medical students, including Armando Navarro, are seen in November 2019 at a school-sponsored clinic for migrant farmworkers in Thermal. (Courtesy of Armando Navarro)

“We recruit heavily from local high schools, community colleges, four-year colleges and universities,” Simmons said by email. “The (funds) really make a difference in our students and future students’ lives.”

Officials said past grants from the foundation have helped ease students’ financial burdens, especially during the coronavirus pandemic. The money also allowed the medical school to bolster professional training clinics and launch wellness programs for students, such as yoga and meditation classes.

Judy Belk, CEO and president of The California Wellness Foundation, said in the release that diversifying the medical workforce is part of its strategy to provide “culturally competent” and “higher quality” healthcare for communities of color.

“Research affirms that when communities know their identities and experiences are respected, they’re more likely to seek out care and trust the treatments they receive,” Belk said. “We want to see more people of color becoming physicians because it’s a pathway to economic security.”

Armando Navarro, a fourth-year medical student at UC Riverside’s School of Medicine, is seen at his July 2018 white coat ceremony with parents Armando Sr. and Patricia Navarro, and younger siblings Vianney and Moises Navarro. (Courtesy of Armando Navarro)

A majority of UCR medical students are also first-generation college students, and the first in their families to finish college. Navarro, whose family immigrated to the U.S. from Mexico, fits both categories. The Riverside resident, a fluent Spanish speaker, is now in his fourth year and specializing in family medicine.

Navarro was inspired to help immigrant families after working at clinics in Riverside, Los Angeles and the Coachella Valley as a pre-med student and while in medical school. After graduation in 2022, Navarro hopes to stay in Southern California to help marginalized groups with limited access to healthcare.

He hopes more Latino and other underrepresented medical students go into the field to serve their own communities. It’s comforting for patients to have a doctor that can speak in their native tongue and guide them to better physical and mental health decisions, he said.

“As a provider, I want people visiting their doctor to feel understood, respected and empowered — it’s why I got into medicine,” Navarro said. “To help people who look like me.”

Crystal Witherspoon, a Crestline resident and third-year medical student at UC Riverside’s School of Medicine, is seen at her August 2019 white coat ceremony with her parents, Norman and Margaret Valentine, and her husband Michael Witherspoon. (Courtesy of Crystal Witherspoon)

Third-year medical student Crystal Witherspoon has a similar goal: to serve the underserved. The Crestline resident started at UCR’s premedical postbaccalaureate program, which helped her get into the medical school in 2019.

Witherspoon, who was born in Spain, said she has no medical professionals in her immediate family. She knew she wanted to go into medicine after seeing firsthand how health disparities affect the Black community.