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bestworstcase · 2 days

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the perennial Tai Discourse is really interesting to track bc, speaking broadly, the two major camps are just:

those who focus primarily on ruby’s recollection of her childhood and relationship with her dad (and filter what yang says through that lens such that “i had to pick up the pieces and keep things together when i was five” gets diluted into “yang had responsibilities as a child”)

those who focus primarily on yang’s memories and her arc in v4 (and tend to just ignore or minimize the things ruby says that suggest a positive relationship with tai, in particular often just flat out disregarding how excited ruby is to spend time with or receive care packages from him)

when it’s like. yeah that’s. literally the point. that ruby and yang had profoundly different childhoods.

they’re half-sisters in a story about fairytales and only one of them had a decent dad. rwby is unsubtly interrogating the fairytale archetype of the Evil Stepmother/Dead Mother with raven (not dead, but absent) and summer (villain, presumed dead) and that archetype quite literally requires its counterpart archetype of the Neglectful Father who remarries and tacitly participates in the Evil Stepmother’s abuse of his child from his first wife

tai is as much an exploration of the fairytale Neglectful Father as raven is the Dead Mom and summer is the Evil Stepmother. that’s. a core aspect of the narrative surrounding the rose xiao long family.

the Dead Mom often reincarnates as a bird or tree or similar spirit to watch over her child; rwby turns this on its head by reimagining the Dead Mom as an absent one. raven watches over yang in her bird form because she is too afraid to be meaningfully present; she isn’t dead, but her absence in yang’s life is so complete that she might as well have been, and the fairytale tension between the Dead Mom’s death and her lingering presence is explored through these cramped and inadequate half-measures raven takes in trying to have it both ways.

the Evil Stepmother is a vehicle for making the fairytale heroine miserable; she has no identity nor any reason for her monstrous treatment of the child who is not her own. rwby, again, flips this over with the mystery of summer rose. who was she, really? did anyone know? she was a good stepmom—she loved yang like her own daughter—but now she’s gone. she left. she never came back. she lied. she joined salem. why? what expectations did she feel on her shoulders? what broke her? why did she do the things she did?

lastly, the Neglectful Father must either be a love-blind fool or a weak, contemptible man with no love or loyalty to his own blood; he forgets his motherless child at the behest of his new love. rwby turns this on its head too by rendering tai as a human being—messy, flawed, fully-realized. wicked stepsisters exist for the purpose of being spoiled by the Evil Stepmother in juxtaposition with her cruelty to the first child, who is kind and good because she remembers her mother’s lessons. the fairytale children of these archetypes function as repetitions of their mothers. rwby makes that the central conceit of its spin on the Neglectful Father: what if he loved both the Dead Mom and the Evil Stepmother so much and then both of them broke his heart in mirrored ways, leaving him a single father to both of their children? if he sees raven in yang and summer in ruby, how does that color his relationships with both girls? if you take away the Evil Stepmother but not her daughter, does the Neglectful Father remember his first child? or are people more complicated than that?

and with all three, the narrative engages with these one-dimensional archetypes by constructing complicated, multi-faceted characters on top of them; by tossing the simplistic moral didacticism of a fairytale and presuming, first, that everyone is trying their best, that bad choices can be made from good intentions, and that no one gets it right all the time, or even most of the time. love and profound dysfunction can coexist.

ruby and yang had very different childhoods. that’s the narrative foundation the whole rose xiao long family is built on, because they’re a deconstruction of the archetypal fairytale blended family.

#this is also why every permutation of ''tai isnt rubys Real Dad'' is nonsense btw. ruby being yang’s half-sister instead of step-sister is #on purpose. the condemnation of the archetypal fairytale Neglectful Father is he mistreats his own blood in favor of another man’s children #and rwby uses his blood relation to both his daughters to question that framing;#the dynamic doesn’t become any Less dysfunctional if the favored child is equally the father’s by blood

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wondertwinsenthusiast · 4 months

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Think about Dick Grayson, such a loyal and loving person, having to leave Bruce and Gotham so many times over the years. Whether Bruce pushed him away once more, or maybe he just felt so sick he just had to leave. Sometimes nobody's at fault, it just happens. People drift away, and maybe Gotham was never truly his hometown anyway.

They'll never be 9 and 25 again, each other's whole world.

They say you never love anything the way you love your first child. Bruce will forever miss the little boy he took in, with great fear and greater love. He misses the little ball of sunshine that was shaking his chandeliers and rocking his world.

They say the firstborn ages with their parent, that the two are maturing together. Dick will forever miss the man who wrapped his jacket around him and told him it'll be okay when he was sobbing on the circus floor. He misses Bruce's soft smile, the one he had when there were fewer wrinkles, white hairs, and all sorts of aches.

The persistent heartache that it is to love and to be loved by Bruce Wayne. The pain of having to be the one who leaves first.

Tiktok slideshows are going to be the end of me.

#i blame tiktok #tiktok slideshow #dick grayson #nightwing #robin #bruce wayne has issues #bruce wayne #batman #dc comics #batfam #dick grayson has eldest daughter syndrom #poems and quotes #dc #character analysis #dick grayson and bruce wayne #mother daughter coded #father and son #complicated relationships

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miso0soup · 1 year

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I need more of them

#thrud thorsdottir #gow thrud #gow sif #lady sif #gow fanart #gow #god of war #god of war ragnorak #gow ragnarok #i love complicated mother/daughter relationships

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possamble · 12 days

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What are your headcanons about Marcille's mom if you have any? It's interesting that what drew Donato to her was cause she lived the history he studied, or that was said somewhere at least. She must've had an interesting life.

so this was going to be just a normal answer but then I realized I have a Lot of Things To Say. so here goes, a compilation of what we know for a fact from the canon, what I've extrapolated from the visual cues and details, and my theories based on all of that.

Things we know for a fact about Marcille's mother because they were explicitly stated in the manga and supplemental materials:

She was a court mage for a Tall-man kingdom at the southern part of the Northern Continent

Donato, a court historian, fell in love with her because she had lived through the history he was studying, and he courted her for 17 years (age 15 to 32) before getting married

She was a cheerful person who rarely showed extreme emotion and took things as they came

She always cooked a huge meal for Marcille on her birthdays

She remarried a gnome after Donato's death and a short distance away from Marcille's childhood home

Pipi, Marcille's pet bird, was actually older than Marcille and originally belonged to her mother (bird died at 62)

She was extremely heartbroken when Donato died and ultimately ended up instilling a deep fear of mortality in Marcille with her words

the only time she showed extreme emotion in front of her family was when Donato could no longer eat his favourite dish near the end of his life.

She scolded Marcille for being cruel to ants (implying she can have a stern side when needed)

Things that are explicitly shown but mostly through visual cues

She has a very distinctive style of dress always involving a ribbon choker (mirroring Marcille's habit of always wearing a matching choker with any of her outfits that don't cover her neck)

She was almost stereotypically good at housekeeping and traditionally "wifely" things (very frequently depicted wearing an apron or doing some domestic chore when not at work, seems to have been an avid cook).

She knits? (also, note the affectionate smile as she's looking at Donato and Marcille reading a book together in the full panel)

She was as excited for Marcille's milestones as Donato was.

She didn't tell Marcille much about elven food

(there are a couple things that this panel in particular implies:

She lived a good deal of her life (if not being born and raised) in a mainly elven country in the West, implied by her knowing enough of an elven region's cuisine to prefer Tall-man food over it

seems to have a pretty carefree and casual demeanour overall, if this is how she replied to Marcille asking her about it (sounds like she never gave her culinary preferences that much thought to begin with)

slightly related to number 2, it seems like she and Marcille had a fairly casual parent-child dynamic (especially in comparison to the Toudens' memory of their father)

(local elf tastes Italian food once and never goes back))

However, she seems a lot more... serious in most of the other times we see her? Almost like the very stereotypical archetype of a graceful elf.

Subsequent conclusions about her personality:

Usually pretty carefree and cheerful at home, has been a loving and attentive parent throughout Marcille's childhood (while not being so doting that she didn't discipline Marcille).

Slightly more conjectural theories on her personality:

Had a much more graceful and professional personality at work, which would explain the more serious portraits we see of her.

Given that both she and Donato had positions at the royal court, it seems a little odd that she'd go out of her way to do all the housework herself, so maybe she just enjoyed doing it?

Now taping all the evidence together and toeing the line between analysis and fanfiction:

It's clear that she loved Donato very much and was utterly devastated by losing him. But there's one thing that really stuck out to me in what little we see of her:

Doesn't she seem... angry? The way she's gritting her teeth, clutching the tablecloth, and how this is the first and only time we see her eyes opened that wide. In the following panel, you see her being quiet and dejected after her initial outburst. She's still crying very intensely, but her brows are furrowed, and she's not really responding to Donato's affection in her body language.

We're not told the details of how she felt about losing Donato other than that it upset her. But this, to me, implies that she was angry and resented that he was aging, that the end of his life was approaching. An "it's not fair" type of preemptive grief. And if this was the first and last time she cried like this in front of her family, she was either very good at coping in private... or very bad at letting herself feel unpleasant emotions until they become unavoidable and end up overwhelming her.

It's not too remarkable a detail on the surface. It's even reminiscent of what the audience has seen of Marcille. But... when it comes to the big picture, you'd think an elf who voluntarily chose to marry a tall-man and have a half-elf child would have been better prepared for this.

It kind of recontextualizes her cheerfulness to me.

"I'm sure everything's gonna be okay!" (or some variation thereof, depending on what translation you have).

And this is stated to contrast her extreme grief when finally confronting Donato's failing body and eventual death. But I'm wondering if... maybe this optimism was why she was so upset. What if she went into all of it thinking "everything's gonna be okay"? What if she was a little young by elven standards, and just followed her heart thinking that her own resilience would get her through anything?

Of course, only to get completely overwhelmed when she actually loses Donato. She turns into a completely different person. And that's heartbreaking on its own-- but what the audience sees is the effect it had on Marcille. Can you imagine being her, watching your invincible and upbeat mother suddenly lose all the light in her eyes in one go?

I've already made a huge post about how I think Marcille models her "work persona" off her mother, but another thing that stuck with me as I was looking for more details in the manga was this:

copy pasting from the other post i made about it lmao it's like... the second she resigns herself to lifelong pain and terror, there's another portrait of her mother facing her like this. with their heads bowed, in mirrored body language of resignation and despair and sorrow. Except it's posed like Marcille is still looking at her mother but her mother is looking away.

It took me a second to realize, but I think that it's a visual metaphor for the fact that Marcille's mother was the only long-lived role model she had-- and she failed to model healthy grief for her daughter. I don't say this as an accusation or to disparage her as a character, but just as a matter of fact. In her, Marcille was seeing herself older and losing a short-lived spouse or loved one of her own, and all she saw was hopelessness.

But her mother didn't mean to instill hopelessness and terror in her. She wasn't really thinking of how it would truly affect Marcille at all (at least, that's how I'm interpreting her looking down and away from Marcille in the metaphor), she was just sad. And she, in her own way, was trying to protect her daughter and help her prepare for future losses.

What she meant was "loss is inevitable, and you have to learn how to be in pain but live on anyway." What Marcille heard was "loss is inevitable, and you will be scared and hurt for the rest of your life."

Again. Marcille's mother doesn't feature explicitly in the story the way her father does -- but in so many ways, her shadow, her silhouette, her reflection is always hanging over Marcille.

All that to say... headcanon-wise (everything from here on is 100% without evidence lmao), I'd like to think that she matured and realized that she failed Marcille. I imagine her being regretful about it, wanting a chance to fix it but never finding a way to insert herself back into Marcille's life when Marcille is so so so busy becoming the most accomplished mage possible. I imagine her being herself again, now, so many years after her loss and after remarrying -- but with her cheerfulness tempered with a lot more wisdom and the pain of having gone through loss like that. I think the second Marcille actually tells her what happened in the dungeon, she'd want to go running to her daughter again -- if Marcille tells her the full truth instead of just being embarrassed she let things get that far. (oh, the tragedy of her wanting to be more like her mother and an accomplished adult who doesn't need to be babied... being embarrassed to actually tell her mother how much she fucked up...)

There's also the tension of her having remarried -- I know that there's at least a little bit of resentment that Marcille harbours about that, because she's childish like that at heart even if she makes an effort not to externalize it. I think that her mother would be aware of that, potentially adding to her sense of guilt and apprehension at trying to reappear/intrude on Marcille's life. I honestly don't think Marcille has met her stepfather -- or even considers him a stepfather rather than "mama's new husband" and kind of a total stranger. I think she and her mother actively don't talk about it in their correspondence, like an elephant in the room.

but, ultimately, I think her mother is on her side no matter what. Ancient magic? Dark necromancy? Sure, she'll feel guilty and like she was partially responsible for setting Marcille down such a painful path, but she wouldn't care. that's her daughter!! she would've moved back west and been petitioning for her at the court, buying a house right next to the Canaries barracks and visiting her every day that she wasn't on a mission. And if her husband had opinions on Marcille becoming a "dark arts user," he either gets over it or it's divorce with him. Yes, she might have had her optimism completely humbled by losing Donato like that -- but she's still headstrong and self-assured and she doesn't care what people think of her. It's her way or the highway and she's always going to be in Marcille's corner.

(She also needs a name lol. I went with Juno, just to be cute about "Marcille"s closest real life equivalent being Marcella, which is the female version of Marcellus, which in turn is a diminutive of Marcus, which was derived from Mars. Absolutely in love with Marcille potentially being named after Ares/Mars the fucking god of war btw)

#asks #she could easily be interpreted as distant or neglectful after Donato's death too #with how little involvement she has in Marcille's life/the fact that Marcille doesn't even mention her when talking about her life prospect #and that's fair! I will argue to hell and back that she was a loving parent when Donato was alive #but there's nothing that suggests she remained a loving parent afterwards #I just think that like... parental relationships are so complicated in dungeon meshi #you cannot deny that the toudens' mother loved them dearly but that she failed them both miserably as a parent #and i think it'd be more compelling if Marcille's mother was a little like that too #not a totally and easily dismissable deadbeat #but someone who truly loves her daughter but was only human herself and couldn't be what Marcille needed at a crucial moment #and regrets it deeply #and that the distance between them is mutually self-imposed by complicated feelings of guilt and fear #and a little resentment from Marcille's side that she hasn't really properly processed #I don't know if I'll ever get around to writing it but i had this idea where Marcille does finally spill the beans to her mom and she just #immediately arrives in Melini #and its awkward for a bit but they do finally have a heart to heart and air it all out #and marcille starts freaking out that her marriage is rocky rn bc her new husband wants her to distance herself from marcille #on account of the crimes and all #marcille's like no you can't blow up your marriage for me and her mother just shuts that shit down #'you didn't choose to be born. i was the one who made that choice for you'#'i brought you into this world and i'll be damned if i don't take responsibility for that the entire way'#'you are entitled to *nothing less* than my unconditional love.'#and obviously that's not a sentiment that's exactly healthy as a universal statement about parenthood #but i think its what her mother would believe and what marcille needs to hear #and dungeon meshi does such a fantastic job at just... letting imperfect things just *be* without having to justify it immediately #it expects the audience to do their own critical thinking #and know that its not trying to make sweeping universal statements in every instance #marcilleposting #marcille donato

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yardsards · 11 months

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mostly joking toh theory: amity and emira are both trans girls, and the fact that they got to choose their names themselves is the only reason why neither of them ended up getting named "odalia jr."

#eliot posts #toh #the owl house #amity blight #emira blight #odalia just strikes me as the type of person to name a daughter after herself #i have a couple relatives who named their kids after themselves and it's always seemed so fucking weird to me???#like i cannot imagine being like. hi i'm eliot and this is my son eliot.#honestly thinking about it there's a good chance my dad would've tried to name me after himself if i were amab #my mother wanted to name me axl but i think my dad could've won her over #and either named me after himself #(either his legal name or his nickname‚ which was after an uncle of his bc he was apparently the spitting image of)#or named me after his own father. which would make me the third of my cousin group to bear that name #(though ironically only one of said cousins was named after our grandpa. the other was named after his dad who married in to the family)#also apparently even as an afab baby i was apparently the spitting image of one of those cousins #to the point where my mother told me her first thought upon seeing me after i was born was just ''oh god she looks just like [cousin]''#for an extra layer of Bullshit: vincent cat's name at the shelter was the same as my dad's nickname so i had to change it #bc having a cat with sorta the same name as my dad whom i have a Complicated and Bad relationship with would feel Weird #this is all irrelevant but i just need you to know how batshit the name situation on my dad's side of the family is #my mother's side is mostly uncomplicated except for the surname situation going on #like i have no clue who my mother's maiden name came from and at this point i'm too afraid to ask #but yea since i was afab my given first name was just a random name that my mother thought was pretty #my given middle name tho WAS after a family member #specifically my rich childless aunt on my dad's side #the original plan was just a second random name my mother liked but then i popped out prematurely on that aunt's birthday #so my dad's OTHER sister (who had barged in uninvited to the delivery room) told my mother #''hey it's [childless aunt's] birthday today. she's rich and has no kids. name your child after her and she might help pay for college''#but my chosen name and middle name are unrelated to anyone. just two names i really liked and thought fit me + my gender.

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madwoman14 · 9 months

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mothers stand still so daughters can look back to see how far they have come

miss greta gerwig do u want to fight or kiss

#not a gerwig film if it doesn’t dissect the complicated relationship that is mother and daughter #greta gerwig #barbie

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iamchickenhearmesquawk · 2 months

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Whenever I see Turning Red hate I’m kind of assuming they’re either eleven or 50 years old.

#it’s such a good depiction of middle school girlhood #and also complicated mother daughter relationships #among everything else #also a different ish style coming from Disney is always lovely #oh oh and the COLOURS #there was so much love put into that movie #turning red #anyway #mini rant

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sage-nebula · 1 year

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Something I think more people would benefit from is realizing that relationships are multi-faceted and can be more than one thing at a time.

"They're not lovers, they're best friends!" They can be both, and in fact your lover being your best friend is often encouraged.

"They're just besties, they aren't found family!" Again, they can be both, these concepts are not mutually exclusive.

Relationships in real life are often multi-faceted. There are people who will say that their sister / mom / brother / other family member is their best friend with their whole chest, and mean it. There are people who are both coworkers and friends, or coworkers and nemeses. People who are acquaintances but also neighbors but also carpool mates but also constantly at odds as members of the HOA. People who are FWB but the "friends" part is very loose. People who are related by blood but can't stand each other. And so on.

Except for in very shallow situations, relationships are very rarely just one thing. If you start dating your best friend, they don't stop being your best friend. They just also become your partner. If two siblings end up deciding they're each other's best friend, they don't stop being siblings. And so on.

I know a lot of the issue in fandom comes down to characters themselves being seen as one-dimensional, and therefore their relationships often are, too. But people are usually more than one thing at a time, and therefore so are their relationships. And I think a lot of people would benefit from learning that sooner rather than later. Not just for fandom reasons, but for real world ones too.

#idk how to tag this #but when the whole premise of Gilmore Girls was they were mother & daughter & also bffs #when Ben and Leslie said ''I love you & I like you'' in their wedding vows #when the Doctor spent a whole year being tortured by the Master yet still sobbed over his death #people & relationships are complicated. it's not a zero sum game.

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filmnoirsbian · 7 months

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curious as to why you're not a fan of gerwig. (i'm not either tho!) would love to hear your thoughts.

It's not deep I just think her stuff is boring.

#asks #i haven't seen barbie but i fell asleep during little women #lady bird DID hold my interest but only bc complicated mother/daughter relationships are my drug. i still think it could have cut deeper

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akiizayoi4869 · 2 years

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Azula and Ursa: A Complicated Mother-Daughter Relationship

I've been meaning to do this one for a while now but kept on forgetting to do so. The relationship between these two is one that has always interested me because there is so much to it. Unfortunately though the writers have no interest in diving deeper into it because Azula isn't Zuko. It's a shame that they don't explore it further because this right here?

That is a whole lot to unpack. I really hope that these two can reconcile one day (seriously writers just do it already!) because Azula deserves to have a relationship with her mother. Ursa needs to own up to the fact that she wasn't a very good mother to Azula and make up for that. In this meta I will be explaining why Ursa wasn't a good mother to Azula.

Ursa failed to realize why Azula would act out

We all know that little kids do stupid stuff, right? It's a part of growing up. All of us were kids at one point, we all did stuff that we can look back on and think "Wow, that was pretty dumb. Why did I do that?" Sometimes we may have acted out in a way because we wanted attention from our parents or whoever our guardians were because we weren't getting enough attention. These actions could sometimes lead to a negative response from our parents, but that was fine because at least we had their attention.

In that scene in The Search where Azula burns that flower in the garden when she was walking behind Ursa and Zuko, that is exactly why she did it.

In the first panel we see Azula trailing behind Ursa and Zuko as they seem to be enjoying the conversation that they were having. Ursa was giving her full attention to Zuko and wasn't paying Azula any mind at all. So what does Azula do? She burns the first thing that she sees, which is a flower. Now going by what she did to Zuko, she didn't want him to say anything and most likely wanted Ursa to notice it on her own. Either way she got the desired result: Ursa was now taking notice of her. Yes, it was negative attention but it didn't matter. What did matter was that Azula was finally being seen by her mother. Even if it was only for a few short minutes. Ursa then shouts at Azula and tells her to go to her room, and then immediately her focus is back on Zuko.

Now, I don't necessarily blame Ursa for this, not at all. She was making sure that Zuko was ok since Azula just gave him a little burn. However, she failed to realize why Azula acted out that way. And no, Azula burning that flower doesn't mean that she is a sociopath. Keep in mind that this is the FIRE NATION, where people have magical fire powers. Azula was 8 or 9 years old here. What do you expect a kid who is that age with fire powers to do? What would you have done at that age with fire powers?

Ursa only scolded Azula but did not explain why what she was doing was wrong

Now this was something that I honestly found to be odd about Ursa's approach to parenting when I noticed it. If a child does something wrong, it's the parents job to tell them to stop and to explain why whatever it was that they did was wrong, and to not do it again. Now, Ursa does do this. But only with Zuko.

In this scene, Zuko throws a loaf of bread at the turtle ducks. Ursa is shocked at this and gently scolds him. However, she also explained to him why it was wrong. He more than likely did not do it again after this incident.

When Azula burns the flower and then gives Zuko a little burn, all she does is shout at Azula and tells her to go to her room and think about what she did. I really shouldn't need to explain why this is bad parenting right here. And this is what I find to be odd about Ursa's approach to discipline. In my experience as the youngest child, whenever I did something wrong, my parents would scold me obviously, and depending on how bad whatever I did was, I would get hit. However, they never failed to explain why what I did was wrong. By explaining it to me it ensured that I wouldn't do it again. It's assumed that the youngest child often needs things explained to them more than the oldest child since they are younger and don't understand things like the oldest child does. Not to say that the eldest one shouldn't get things explained to them, because they absolutely should. My parents did the same thing with my sister. Seeing as Azula is the youngest child, it's baffling that Ursa never seemed to do that with her.

I have no doubts that this looked a certain type of way to Azula and made her think that something was wrong with her. "Why is she only like that with Zuko? Why is it that whenever he gets into trouble, she's always gentle with him and explains why whatever he did was wrong? What makes him so special? What's so different about me that she can't do the same thing?" These were the thoughts that no doubt ran through her mind, and she most likely felt disconnected from her mother.

Ursa did not try hard enough to connect with Azula

Now before anyone goes "Azula was always with Ozai! He wouldn't let her be around her mother at all because he wanted Azula to train constantly!" I just want to say this: that's a load of shit. That man was not around her 24/7. He was a prince, I'm pretty sure that he had plenty of responsibilities to fulfill, none of which included his children. Azula also wasn't constantly training, there is literally proof in canon that says otherwise. Ursa could have spent time with Azula. And yet we don't get the sense that she did. She was always with Zuko. Which, to a certain point, is perfectly understandable. Ozai did not give Zuko the time of day and treated him like dirt because his firebending didn't reach his expectations. So Ursa wanted to make sure that Zuko knew that he was loved by one of his parents. Which is completely fine. What isn't fine though is how she pretty much neglected Azula. And I get that her situation was hard because she was in a abusive marriage with a man who was also abusive to his kids. But she still could have put in the extra effort for her daughter. She sure did for Zuko. It's obvious that she saw Azula as a difficult child, and thus leaned more towards Zuko, who was easier for her to deal with. I'm sure that she could have found something to bond with Azula. Asking your kids what their interests are can go a long way.

So in conclusion, I don't think that Ursa was a good mom to Azula. Her situation made it difficult, but she could have done more. This doesn't mean that Ursa can't do anything to make up for this though. Azula is only, what, 15? 16? She's still a kid. Ursa has all the time in the world to make up for her mistakes with her daughter. She just needs to put in the effort and realize where she fucked up at with Azula. Of course this all comes down to whether or not the writers ever actually let these two reconcile at some point. I really hope that they do, because I refuse to accept this as an end to they're relationship:

#atla #azula #ursa #complicated mother daughter relationship #akiizayoi4869 meta

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sareesnotsorries · 4 months

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the burden of understanding your mother in a way no one else does

I love her. I hate her. I still flinch when she raises her hand. Her hugs are still one of the greatest comforts to me. She looks at me and sees herself and we shoulder that together. (She hates our broad shoulders.) We stopped saying, I love you. We can talk for hours about nothing. We have gone weeks without properly speaking. We have entire conversations during family gatherings with a single glance. Sometimes it feels like she doesn't even know me. I'm jealous of how gentle she is with my nephew. I wonder if she'll ever want to meet my kid. Sometimes I hate that I know her. I'm her most loyal guard dog. I know she's just trying her best. It's not good enough. It's not good enough. It's not good enough.

I deserve better.

So does she.

#i have always had a super complicated relationship with my mom #and recently things have just become even more complex because my extended family is so abusive to her #that quote where even if she didn't break all the cycles she still broke a lot #anyways i haven't written poetry in a while so i feel very unsteady but gonna post this before i overthink too hard #writing #spilled ink #on mothers #mothers and daughters

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quietwingsinthesky · 1 month

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Hiiiii! So, a few days ago you were talking about the whole thing with Amy, Rory, and River. And when I saw those posts a thought arose in my head and I wish to share it with you.

Since River grew up with Amy and Rory as Mels. And Mels was Amy's best friend do you think that they ever talked about children? Since I know that it can come up when talking with friends, and like... do you think that Amy might've ever expressed whether or not she wanted children?

And if she didn't, that Mels would've had to listen to her mother say that she doesn't want children? The idea is so heartbreaking and sooo interesting.

What do you think about it?

no, no, see, you're so right and this drives me wild.

because, the way i see it, i don't think amy wanted children. she's somewhere on the 'hasn't thought about it' to 'vaguely negative feelings about it happening' range to me, which falls sharply into 'Not Happening Ever Again' post-s6. (specifically, in terms of having a kid herself, even if she could, i really don't think she would. i do love that she and rory end up adopting a kid later, because that does make sense, for amy pond who grew up alone in one universe with her family swallowed by cracks in time before the doctor helped her set it right again, for her to want to make sure another child won't be alone in the world like she was. getting off-track here.)

and that's so. because the first real memory river/mels has of amy is of amy shooting at her. and depending on how well the silence fucked up the rest of her memory, it might be one of the very first memories she has at all. that's how she met her mother, crying for help and getting a bullet instead. her mother tried to kill her, so of course, you have to think. she must have needed to hear that she was wanted, right? even if she was taken away, even if amy shot her, at some point, melody must have been wanted?

river is good at getting people to do what she wants, but she is very, very bad at subtlety. and mels is younger, has less practice, so when she wants to know this, she's just going to ask. blunt and quick, easy enough because amy's used to the way mels will open her mouth and you just have to be ready to roll with what comes out if you want to keep up. it's why they're such good friends (like mother, like daughter.)

they're nine, and mels asks if amy wants kids, and amy wrinkles up her nose and says she won't have time for children, obviously, once her raggedy doctor finally comes back. they're fifteen, and amy and rory dance will they-won't they in a way that makes mels twitchy to watch, and taunting amy about wanting to have rory's babies is a good way to get on her nerves. but amy calls her gross, tells her she's got more life planned than children would leave room for, and besides, imagine her, a mom? it'd be a disaster.

mels does. a lot. she looks at her mother and just sees her best friend instead. she's not even sure what she wishes was there, but. maybe amy's right. and besides. imagine her, a daughter, instead of the ticking time bomb she really is? it'd be a disaster.

they're sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, and on. mels stands on the outside of a love story that births a universe. and her. how do you compete with that? not that she would know, not yet, she hasn't been there. but it doesn't make her feel any less alienated when amy and rory talk in whispers about a half-remembered world that's bled through to this life, about roman soldiers and boxes and the big bang of belief.

all these memories, they never mention children. on amy's wedding day, she's different, not like someone remembering a dream but someone who lived it. rory stands straighter, won't leave her side, and they're both so much older than they were yesterday. maybe now, right? a wedding's as good a time as any to decide you want kids.

mels not being at amy & rory's wedding is such an obvious lazy way of them trying to explain why they totally didn't just throw this plot twist together at the last minute that i'm not even going to acknowledge it. of course she was at their wedding. she's their best friend. there's too many people around the doctor, and she wasn't ready today of all days, so despite this horrible burning need under her skin to strike, she stays her hand. doesn't let him dance with her because she might just tear his throat out if he gets too close. stays with amy and rory as the maid of honor should. she must have been there for the awkward questions that always gets asked, 'so, any plans for a baby?' 'when am i getting grandkids?' 'oh, you two are going to have gorgeous children together.' standing a few feet from amy in her wedding dress and watching her mother tense and grit her teeth and brush off the questions. watching her look nervously at rory but never ask if he means it when his mom asks him if he'd prefer a son or a daughter, and rory answers 'either one, some day, not anytime soon.'

god i'm just going on and on, aren't i. but really, what's it like to know that amy never changed her mind. the next time she sees them, she's already been born and stolen. i don't like let's kill hitler for. so many reasons. but there is something compelling about how recklessly river lashes out at the world, at the doctor. even her sacrifice at the end is almost suicidal, throwing all her regenerations into this man without knowing if that will even work or if it might kill her to do it. but it makes more sense in the context of someone who has reached the end of a long, long wait for some kind of indication, any kind, that her mother wanted to have her. and finally been told, no. she didn't choose melody.

#like. to be clear also: i don't think the fact that amy didn't want kids and really didn't have a choice in giving birth to river #means that she wouldn't love river. i think it would make their relationship Complicated but i do think amy loves her. so much.#that's her daughter but it's also her best friend.#but like. god. to spend your whole childhood hoping you'll hear about some little glimmer of yourself.#a dream. a passing mention. a debate on baby names. anything. and to hear nothing.#and river is. like. she is really really bad at relationships right? we know this.#the person she's closest to is the doctor and she spends most of her life believing *he doesn't even love her*.#we're talking about someone whose base assumption about everyone is that they will try to hurt her at some point so she should always keep #one hand armed.#and her mother. didn't choose to have her. didn't have that choice. that has to fuck her up a little.#(and also serve as proof that river is. so so bad at knowing when she is loved. because maybe amy didn't choose to have her but she named #melody pond after mels her best friend. she has been choosing river every day for the past however many years since mels decided to come #here and be near her mom and dad even if only as kids. but river still can't see it.#and. given the nature of how the ponds disappear from her life. and we never get any closure about them and river.#you have to wonder if she ever did. river song do you know your mother loves you?#having the melody-as-river reveal be so close to the end of the season and then getting rid of amy & rory before they can actually do #anything with the three of them as a messed up little family unit is the show's biggest crime. because i don't know! i don't know if river #knew her parents loved her! i don't know if she *ever* came to terms with how she was born and how they didn't need to choose her then to #choose her now! i don't know if river ever really felt comfortable thinking of them as her parents rather than her friends?#according to the transcripts. river calls amy 'mother' twice. (and 'mummy' once jokingly.) she calls rory 'father' once. and 'dad' in angel #in manhattan. and it just. it drives insane right? it's almost weirdly formal. like the words aren't right but she knows she should say the #and. and. i don't think i'm ever going to get over river song.#i think that's the takeaway here.#ask #doctor who #river song #amy pond #rory williams

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self-titled-lives · 10 months

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favorite part of reading the screenplay for The Witch was realizing how adamant Eggers was about describing the sounds of the witch solely as “clickety-clackety”

#there’s a lot i have to say about this screenplay #like how did eggers right a complicated mother daughter relationship in the 1600s that is still relatable in the 21st century #the witch #the vvitch #robert eggers #anya taylor joy #ralph ineson #kate dickie #harvey scrimshaw #the witch 2016 #the vvitch 2016 #screenplay #script

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bluebelleix · 3 months

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(OLD)The Three Sisters of The Court

(They won't be that relevant to Claire' backstory now but they're still there)

They were first mentioned in Claire's introduction(?) and I gave in to give them designs.

HERE THEY ARE!!

Okay so,:

Technically they're the same age as the Headmaster, Meliadoul Amy and Innocent Zero, which is around 118 years old because they were each "blessed" by the God of Justice, Themis.

The oldest of them all is Liliane Laodice; although all of them work in The Court, she's the only who uses it as her main job. She mostly works as the Judge and handles the cases paperworks.

She usually doesn't go out very much so you might not even meet her in public. When trying to meet with her, her schedule is apparently "always busy", so there's already a small chance of meeting her.

Maybe do a crime and get to meet her in Court I guess lol.

The middle one is Elodie Laodice; she's the one who adopted Claire. If you're wondering why would she adopt a child when she's like really old, it's because she wants the law to change without really interfering directly.

She thinks the law around the magic world is getting, well, outdated because they haven't really advanced forward because of the law. Hence one day, she just.. decided to teach someone, train someone early on and change the fate of the world.

Of course she doesn't want to just train someone that's already mature because they might already be influenced that the world is "perfect". So she decided to adopt a child, a child that haven't even experienced the world yet and how it works.

Maybe they can have a different view if she showed them the flaws. If she gives an opportunity to them, would they take it and change the future?

..Onto the last one which is the youngest, Dinah Laodice. She currently works as a religious teacher at Saint Ars (I suspect that Saint Ars might be religious with like the theme around it lol) and a nun at the local church.

She's usually quiet and doesn't speak much and sometimes scares people every time she opens her mouth because they forgot she was there.

She doesn't open up very often and always leaves on time and just like her oldest, no one can really find after school. Students have said that they saw her in the school's courtyard but those seems to be rumours because no one really have evidence for it.

Elodie and Claire's relationship is uhh..hard to say.

Does Claire view her as a mother? Eh depends, from early on as a kid, Claire has always called her "miss". However she does feel a sting in her heart when she realises she doesn't really have anyone to call "mom".

It's not like Elodie doesn't view Claire as her own child but she doesn't exactly call herself a mother. After all, she already a few workers to take care of her while she guides her to a better future she can make.

It's really a complicated relationship but they don't talk it out because one's an older person that thinks what they're doing is right without thinking about the consequences while the other is a child who actually didn't really have any experience in the world and just follows along like a sheep.

..Claire does take it for granted though, after all, she could have a worst fate right? Being adopted by one of the higher ups is already good enough so she really shouldn't complained. She just needs to follow along the script that Miss had made.

#mashle oc #fanmade #oc x canon #mashle #saint ars #artists on tumblr #complicated mother and daughter relationship #sorta

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