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rrickgrrimes8 · 1 year

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Your Bear Part II

summary: you are found (part I)

Joel Miller x daughter!reader, Tommy Miller x niece!reader

warnings: angst, reunion, violence, infected, happy ending :))

not sure if i like this as much as the first part but i hope yall do. i just want to thank you all for the response to my past few fics (especially your bear). its been unreal. i stopped writing for a while and these were my first ones back so this was an insane response to it! thank you so much for your love and appreciation it really does mean a lot!

also! i tagged basically everybody who left a comment asking for part 2 - sorry if thats annoying idk ive never done a taglist before. thanks for the comments tho :)

masterlist

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requests are open

word count: 2.3k

22 Years Ago...

The world around you screamed for help. People ran around, skin on fire, missing massive chunks.

You wailed as they passed, hands tightened around your ears. You just wanted to find help. You wanted to save Sarah. This wasn’t what you expected.

“D-ad,” You cried, hiccupping, “D-addy!” You missed his touch. You missed his voice and his face. His laugh. You just wanted your daddy.

But which way had you come from?

You stood, idle, in an alley way you didn’t recognize, a man lay a few feet beside you. Blood seeped from his neck, running to kiss the tips of your shoes.

He twitched.

Your breath caught in your throat, the hair on your neck stood high. “D-daddy,” You whimpered, quieter than before, “Please.”

He looked at you now. His face grotesque, the shape of jagged teeth marked his greyish skin. White, stringy tendrils extended out of his mouth as he crawled to you – his legs being left behind as he did.

You screamed when his nails scratched against your shoe. In the panic, your bear fell from your grasp, landing in the bloodbath.

You tried backing up from the monster, but his hand stopped you. His claws captured your ankle.

You didn’t realise you were falling until your back hit the wet ground. You let out a shriek as he trailed up your body. “P-please,” You sobbed, “D-ad! D-addy!”

The creature didn’t even flinch. He opened his jaws further, searching for your small neck, ready to mark you just as he had been.

But a shot sounded off and his weight settled on your petite body.

A strong force tugged him off you, the same force pulling you into their arms. You wailed, fighting against the stranger’s grip.

“It’s okay, sweetgirl, you’re okay,” She told you, rushing you away from the scene, “You’re going to be okay; I promise.”

You didn’t know what to make of Jackson. It was nice, you supposed. Weird though. It felt like what you imagined before felt like. Not that you remembered much. You remembered how loud cars were, how the TV remote worked, how to strum a guitar.

You remembered your sisters voice, her hair, how smart she sounded even if you didn’t understand a word.

You wished you remembered your dad. He was a blur to you. Like you had missed a chapter of a book and now a new character had no face. You remembered his laugh though. It was sweet, slow. Like a lullaby. You recalled being held to his chest and feeling the vibrations.

You wished you remembered your dad.

Sarah had settled in quickly, at least that’s what you thought. She was happy to be around people other than her mom (you tried not to internalise it all that much).

In the week since you arrived Sarah had grown attached to the strangers that took you under their wing. You still weren’t so sure. But when Sarah made grabby hands to the older man and all she got was a dejected smile in response a part of you hurt. You didn’t understand why.

They’d kept their distance or rather he had. Ellie came round every day. She loved Sarah. She loved you, even if, like Joel, you were a little rough around the edges.

But for a reason unbeknownst to you Joel couldn’t be in a room with you for longer than five minutes. You didn’t let it bother you too much. You couldn’t. You didn’t want to make trouble and get the pair of you kicked out or worse separated.

Ellie had come to you earlier that day, smile wide, cheeks rosy. She had a glint in her eyes, a plan. One you really didn’t want to know about nor be a part of.

Excitedly, she told you about the couple who lived across from her and Joel - his brother. Tommy and Maria and the somewhat new addition of Lily, their little girl. Ellie had told them about you - although missing out some of the major minor details. They agreed to have you over she had said. And despite the age difference between Lily and Sarah the older girl was excited to meet her.

So, there you stood, Sarah shielded from the cold into your chest. You raised your hand awkwardly, knocking a little harder than you expected.

A woman opened the door. She was beautiful, smiley, friendly. You couldn’t tell if that was a façade or not. That made the nerves in your stomach stiffen. “C’mon in, sweetheart,” Maria ushered you inside after she confirmed it was you.

You forced a smile for her, “Nice place.”

Maria nodded, looking around the room proudly, “Thank you.” She urged you to take a seat, letting you know her husband, Tommy, was just dressing Lily.

“So, you’re younger than I thought you would be,” She confessed, “Not to be rude or anything.”

“No, it’s okay,” You cleared your throat, sitting opposite her, Sarah making a home on your lap, “I’m 27.”

“Wow,” She smiled, “And what about her?”

You stroked the top of Sarah’s head, where her hair had slightly begun to grow, “Couple weeks now.”

Maria shifted ever so slightly in her seat, unspoken sympathy in her eyes, “And the father?” You stilled, escaping her gaze you looked towards the coffee table, taking inventory of the odd books they had. “I’m sorry,” She spoke quietly, “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

“N-no,” You cleared your throat sheepishly, “There isn’t... her dad did what he had to.” You still remembered his screams.

“I’m sorry,” Maria frowned, hands soothing over her jeans, wishing Tommy would appear to aid the situation.

“Don’t be,” You said earnestly, “He got us here, right? One way or another...” Maria wasn’t sure you really meant that. The lost look in your eyes told her what she needed to know. As did your shaking knee. You’d give anything to have him back. She bit her lip, somewhat guessing the rest.

“Sorry ‘bout that,�� A males voice cut through the tension, “Wouldn’t stop squirming for the life of me.”

Maria chuckled opening her arms to grab Lily, introducing you as she did. He blanched hearing that name. He near screamed seeing that face - your face but so much different, so much more mature.

Tommy blinked a few times, wondering if his eyes were deceiving him. He whispered your name carefully, as if you were a wild animal, prone for violence.

Maria gave him an odd look, moving Lily over to you and Sarah. “And this is our sweetheart, Lily,” She told you as Lily began fussing relentlessly in her arms, desperate to touch the baby.

“Baby,” She cooed.

“Yeah, that’s right,” You mused, croakily, inching closer to the pair, “This is Sarah, Lily.”

Tommy wanted to throw up. He felt it dancing up his throat, teasing his uncertainty. He felt stuck. He truthfully didn’t know what to do or what to say. Should he straight out ask you? You didn’t seem to recognise him though. Maybe it was a clone? A doppelgänger? Should he run over to Joel’s for safety away from this confusion?

Joel.

Did Joel know? He had to know. He needed to know.

“Tommy what’s wrong?” Maria called to him. He choked a little, eyes trailing over to the plaque that watched over their new life. The plaque he knew had no place for your name. He knew it. You were here.

Maria followed his gaze, a weird feeling in her chest as she saw her husband so unlike himself. She read Joel’s daughter’s name. Sarah. Was he freaked out because they shared the same name?

She gulped - it wasn’t just the baby whose name was shared but yours too it seemed. You couldn’t be, right? No- You died. Joel was so sure you died and despite all Tommy had told her, all the hope he had for you, she always found herself on Joel’s side. Funny that. Any other situation she would’ve made a point to oppose the eldest Miller.

But now... You were just five. You couldn’t have survived on your own. You wouldn’t have had a life in this world.

But again, hadn’t you said you were 27?

“Go,” She told him, firmly, “Make sure.” Tommy nodded, failing to hide his tears as you watched in confusion and darted out of the room with a sense of urgency that unsettled your stomach.

“Is everything okay?”

Maria’s attention snapped back to you, “Fine... everything’s fine.”

A disconcerting feeling swam under your skin and a sudden resolve to flee hit you. “I- We should probably go,” You mumbled, bringing Sarah to your chest once more.

“Wait, please,” She attempted, “Just wait.”

You shook your head, apologising softly before rushing out of the house. You caught eyes with two men across the road - Joel and Tommy. They stood on his porch, seemingly arguing with each other.

You spotted Ellie watching through the window, a guilty look on her face - what had she done?

The brothers stared at you as you left the home. Their eyes didn’t leave you for a second. Tommy called your name, desperately but when he moved to catch up with you, Joel pulled him back.

He clenched his jaw as you rushed back to your home, out of sight. “She was my niece, Joel,” He scowled, “My fuckin’ family too.”

Joel shook his head, shaking off the shame Tommy was trying to force on him.

“You don’t get to keep this kind of thing from me,” He yelled, “You- You are unbelievable, Joel.”

“Unbelievable?” He mocked, “Is it so unbelievable that I didn’t want to advertise to the whole goddamn town that she was my daughter when, hell, I don’t even know if she really is!”

“Bullshit,” Tommy spat, “You’re not stupid. You knew. Of course, you fucking knew. You knew like how I knew. One look. That’s all it woulda took you. No… you knew. You were just too scared - like always. And that, your selfishness, takes us all down with you.”

“Fuck you,” He grunted, storming back inside.

“Christ,” Tommy mumbled, turning back to his own home.

You had a baby.

You were here, alive.

You steered clear from the group for a little while afterwards. The whole situation made you heart clench. It felt like a game that you didn’t know the rules of, but they did. All of them did and they were careful not to reveal anything. But you wanted to know - you needed to.

You knew it involved Joel or at least you felt like it had to. The way he looked at you when you first met. The way he spoke. The way he shook. It had to be him. He had to be the answer.

You gave up on your attempts to avoid them when you came to that realisation.

The same realisation that brought you here, at his front door in the middle of the night. You shyly knocked a few times - no response. You repeated the action with a little more force, a little too much. The door creaked open on the contact, but no one came to greet you.

You sucked in a harsh breath as you debated entering. The door was open right? Fair game? Silently you forced yourself to step inside.

Their home was dark - one lamp lighting a whole room. You frowned looking over to it. Someone had to be here, right? Where else would they be so late?

And then you saw him. Joel. The contradictory man. He was asleep. His body was sprawled all over the couch, an empty bottle of God knows what lay beside him as did what looked like... a bear?

Shakily, you took a step forward, his name dying in your throat as you saw the bear in a better light.

It was... yours.

Why would Joel have your bear? The bear that when you were a child was essentially an extension of you. The bear that chased away all the bad dreams. The bear that your dad had gotten you - your dad.

You gulped - the bear you hadn’t seen since the night you lost everything. Since the night you almost lost your life.

Joel shifted in his sleep, pulling the bear close to his chest, careful of its head as if it was a baby. Your eyes burned. A gasp escaped your lips. You could read the chapter now. You can see that character’s face - your fathers face.

Different but the same.

“D-dad,” You whispered before you could stop yourself and backed away.

Your back met the door, slamming it shut. The man jolted awake, alarmed eyes frantically searching the room before landing on you. They grew small, weaker, like he wasn’t all the way there.

Joel watched you closely, taking note of your falling tears, he spoke your name. You choked on a sob, hand clasping over your mouth. “Baby,” He shot up before he had a moment to think and approached you.

You didn’t flinch away, like he expected. You didn’t stop crying either. You studied him now. The wrinkles. The scars. The grey hairs. The same look in his eyes.

“How long have you known?”

He flinched at that. Your voice so familiar, so broken. “Since we met,” He didn’t have to try too hard to understand what you were getting at. He felt shameful, though. This shouldn’t have been the way, right? This felt too casual, too unknown.

You wanted to ask more, yell at him. Beg him to tell you why it wasn’t the first thing that he told you. But you didn’t. Instead you put one foot in front of the other, until you were mere inches from him. “Dad,” You shuddered.

He hadn’t realised how much he missed being called that, how much he missed being your dad.

“Babygirl,” He took your face in his hands, “My baby grown up.” He watched you closely, tears welling up, “I’m so sorry, babygirl. I’m sorry.”

You shook your head, slamming yourself into his chest, “It’s okay. I’m okay.”

“Oh, baby,” Joel wrapped his arms around you, hand cradling the back of your head.

“With me, babygirl,” He smiled for moment before letting it fall, “Don’t go away again, babygirl, never go away again.”

You smiled into his chest, whimpering softly, “I won’t, dad, I promise.”

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#joel miller imagine #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller angst #joel miller x daughter!reader #tommy miller x platonic!reader #tommy miller x niece!reader #ellie williams x platonic!reader #the last of us imagine #joel miller x platonic!reader

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greenglowinspooks · 6 months

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(DCxDP) Drowning in formaldehyde (Pt. 1)

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Tw: one instance of canon-typical violence (DC), vivisection mention

Will be crossposted to AO3 eventually

(Prologue) - (Pt. 2)

(Subscription post/masterlist)

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Danny has been working for Mr. Cobblepot for over a month now.

The first few weeks he was in the Penguin’s company, he couldn’t do much of anything. Instead, Mr. Cobblepot made sure that he was well-rested and beginning to recover.

Danny cried a lot in the first week that he was there.

He cried when he ate for the first time in years; the GiW had kept him on IVs and a feeding tube, so they wouldn’t have to move him from his surgical table.

He cried when he was given his own room to stay in, when he was brought clothes to wear, when he was given a bodyguard to protect him.

He cried when Mr. Cobblepot’s doctors told him that the damage to his vocal chords was likely permanent, and that he would never sound the same again. That he would find it hard to speak at any volume above a whisper.

Apparently, he had a lot more damage to him than he had thought.

The doctors said that the scarring in his brain stem suggested his entire brain had been removed and had regrown. Danny couldn’t really disprove that, and it did line up with a pretty substantial gap in his memory, but if that was the case then why couldn’t his voice recover too?

The scarring and incredibly new tissue that showed up in scans of several other parts of his body suggested that the GiW had done the same thing with most of his organs, as well as a few limbs, and all of the fingers on his right hand.

Danny could remember that. He just didn’t want to.

Perhaps it was the feeling of pity that kept Mr. Cobblepot so understanding of Danny’s slow recovery. That didn’t really matter much, though; Danny’s energy was focused on keeping his place here, ensuring that Mr. Cobblepot didn’t decide he was no longer worth the effort.

As it turned out, there was an easy enough solution to that.

Danny was the only one who knew how to properly operate and modify the weapons and inventions stolen from the GiW.

And so, Danny had a niche he could occupy. He could be useful, useful enough that Mr. Cobblepot couldn’t get rid of him, even if he wanted to.

And, as it turns out, Danny remembered quite a lot of the theories he heard while he was on the cutting board.

As soon as he had enough muscle control of his arms to do so, he was working away at the machinery created by the GiW and his parents.

No, not his parents.

Doctors Madeleine and Jack Fenton.

Regardless of their creators, he was able to understand them quite intimately.

Maybe it was because the ectoplasm flowing through the weaponry was his own, maybe it was because he had nothing to listen to for three years other than the excited chatter of his vivisectionists as they cut him open. Maybe it was because they were both simple weaponry without a purpose.

Danny found working on the machines soothing in a way that nothing else was.

The smell of oil and grease, the sounds of mechanical clanking and metal joints squealing, the feeling of cold steel beneath his fingertips.

The first thing he did to the machines was replacing the paint, from shiny white to a matte black. That way, they were recognizable as his own modified creations.

It was only a bonus that he didn’t catch his reflection in the metal surfaces this way.

Still, his reflection was starting to become more familiar to him. It was still strangely off-putting to see, but his face was beginning to plump out from consistent eating, and his skin was beginning to lose its unhealthy pale tone, going back to a more natural pinkish color.

His eyes still looked devoid of life, but that could be ignored as long as he didn’t look at himself for too long.

Danny sighed, leaning back in his chair as he wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. He was working on modifying the ectoblasters so that they could properly hit humans, as per Mr. Cobblepot’s orders.

He probably should feel some sort of moral conflict over it, but really, Danny couldn’t find it in him to care. Maybe it was some sort of deep internal flaw, or maybe it was because he knew that they wouldn’t be shot at anyone without blood on their hands. Either way, he didn’t have any qualms with what he was doing.

As Danny reconnected the circuitry within the gun, the indicator lights on the side of the muzzle blinked to life, a familiar neon green.

Danny would have to change that color too, he thought. Maybe red would be nice instead, or an icy blue?

He was pulled from his thoughts by the door to his temporary workshop opening. Danny looked up, and smiled when he saw that his bodyguard was the one standing in the doorway.

The man, known only as Derringer, was 6’2”, built like a tank, and known for his love of unusual firearms. He was also a big fan of card games, and had been teaching Danny how to play Blackjack during their meals.

He gently closed the door behind him, strolling into the workshop.

Danny hopped out of his seat, hugging the man tightly. Derringer laughed, patting Danny on the back as he clung to him like a koala.

“Good to see you too, kid,” the man said, his deep voice rumbling in his chest, “you just about done in here?”

Danny nodded, letting go of the bodyguard. He picked up the gun on the desk, handing it to Derringer, and pointed to the target resting in the far corner of the room.

Derringer glanced down at Danny, shrugging before aiming the gun.

He pulled the trigger, and a large scorch mark appeared in the center of the target.

Derringer whistled appreciatively, walking over to inspect the damage.

There was a deep dent in the center of the metal target, around an inch in diameter, and a large scorch mark surrounding it. The metal of the dent was white-hot, and the area around it was somewhat warped.

“That’s real nice, kid,” Derringer said, “don’t know how you do it.”

Danny grinned, baring his teeth at the man. He smiled back, ruffling his hair.

“The boss is gonna go forward with the Arkham raid soon, so long as your guns are ready,” he said, “he’s eager to try them out for real. You think you’re up to talking to him?”

“Yes,” Danny signed, nodding to the man.

“Good,” Derringer signed back.

Mr. Cobblepot, not wanting Danny to be limited in his speech by the damage to his vocal chords, had ensured that all of the people who interacted with him knew at least the basics of ASL.

When he wasn’t working on the ectoblasters, Danny was practicing his ASL with a dedicated tutor, or with Derringer, who learned the language when his mother had gone deaf.

“Can I eat first?” Danny signed, “I forgot to.”

“You forgot, or you didn’t want to leave your work?” Derringer asked, signing as he spoke, the corners of his eyes crinkled with amusement, “and yeah, the boss wants to talk to you in thirty minutes. You’ve got plenty of time before then.”

“Thank you,” Danny signed, “let’s go.”

“Hey, just a sec,” Derringer said. His face had dropped into something unusually serious.

Danny nodded, tilting his head as he signed a quick “what’s wrong?”

“You’re a good kid. Even after what you’ve been through, you’re…you’re a really sweet kid,” Derringer said, looking away. “But you…you can’t keep being sweet to everyone. You gotta act tough, alright?”

“Why?”

“You just…” Derringer sighed, combing a hand through his thick, curly hair, “a lot of the guys think that you’re too weak to be here. They’re calling you the Penguin’s pet project, and the problem is that they’re not really wrong. You gotta be scarier to survive, alright? Gotham’ll eat you alive if you don’t. Just make up a persona and roll with it.”

Danny nodded slowly, processing his words for a moment.

“Like a mask?”

Derringer laughed, a bittersweet smile on his face.

“Yeah, like a mask. Just don’t start fighting crime while you’re at it.”

“Okay,” Danny signed, his movements slow. “I can do that.”

“Good on you, kid,” Derringer said, ruffling his hair once more, “now let’s go get lunch.”

The two of them ate quickly, Danny’s mind on Derringer’s advice the entire time.

He was right, and Danny knew it. He’d seen the way that some of Mr. Cobblepot’s men had looked at him.

He wasn’t anywhere near big enough to pull off the looming intimidating look that Derringer did; his doctors back in Amity had told him that he would grow to be over six foot, but his time in the GiW seemed to have stunted his growth significantly. He was only around 5’6”, and it seemed that he was going to stay that way.

In the same way, he wasn’t nearly frightening looking enough to pull off the terrifying stares of the smaller individuals working under Mr. Cobblepot. He just couldn’t get the glare right; his face would always fall back to a blank, dead stare.

Though, maybe if he played into that…

A few minutes before they had to leave, Danny excused himself to go to the restroom. He stared into the mirror, looking into his cold, dead eyes, and let his face drop.

When he adjusted his stance, and kept his eyes a bit wider than usual, he looked downright unnerving.

Danny had already noticed that most of his mannerisms were…unusual, after his stay at the GiW base. Put simply, he had forgotten what it was like to be a human.

He had noticed that most of the people around him would avoid being in his presence, and had begun mirroring their body language as much as he could to seem more normal.

Maybe, though, it would be better for him not to.

He could lean into the whole thing. An unstable young adult, experimented on by the government for years.

Danny looked into the mirror, and wide, icy eyes stared back at him.

Danny left the restroom. Derringer turned to greet him, jolting when he did. After a moment, he nodded.

“That your new look?”

“Yes. Is it good?”

“Yeah. Freaky. Gonna take some getting used to, but yeah. Now,” he said, getting up from his spot at the break room table, “let’s go see the boss.”

Danny felt anxiety bubbling up in his chest, his entire body beginning to twitch. If Mr. Cobblepot didn’t approve of the weaponry, or if he thought they were underwhelming, would he be thrown out? Would he be tortured again, or killed?

Danny shivered when they came to a stop in front of the door to Mr. Cobblepot’s office. Failure wasn’t an option. He had to make sure this went well.

“You’ll do great, kid,” Derringer whispered, pushing the door open.

Mr. Cobblepot had been talking with a few other people, but their conversation died out when Danny and Derringer entered the room. Danny’s skin crawled.

“Ah, Danny! Just the person I wanted to see,” Mr. Cobblepot said, a large smile on his face, “Do you have one of your guns with you?”

“Yes,” Danny signed, nodding.

“Wonderful. I was just telling my associates here about your work. Do you mind giving a demonstration?”

“Where should I shoot? Do you have a target?”

Derringer was quick to translate. Mr. Cobblepot nodded, gesturing for a hired hand in the corner of the room to pull out a small wooden board, holding it up in the air.

Danny paled. He would definitely burn the man’s hands if he hit the target, even if he aimed for the furthest corner of the board.

Still, he was more terrified of disappointing Mr. Cobblepot than he was empathetic towards the man, so he drew a blaster from the holster on his leg and aimed carefully.

The blast hit the center of the board. The man holding it howled in pain, dropping the target and drawing his hand close to his chest. The nauseating smell of burning flesh filled the room.

Danny breathed shakily, in and out.

Mr. Cobblepot, for what it was worth, looked like he couldn’t possibly be happier. He and the others inspected the board on the ground closely, ignoring the hired hand as he ran out of the room, still cradling his damaged hand.

A large hole had been blown into the board, and a good portion of it had been incinerated.

“Look at that, ladies and gentlemen! I told you that Danny would deliver, and deliver he did! Imagine if that had been a person instead! Danny, what would you say would happen?”

Danny paused, trying to wince when he realized that the question wasn’t hypothetical, and Mr. Cobblepot actually wanted an answer.

“It would give them S-E-V-E-R-E burns,” Danny finger spelled the word that he didn’t know the proper sign for, “mostly S-U-R-F-A-C-E. It can’t P-E-I-R-C-E, because there is no bullet, just energy.”

Derringer translated for him.

Mr. Cobblepot frowned, and Danny frantically continued, “but it can be L-E-T-H-A-L! Burns on the head kill fast. Burns on the body make S-H-O-C-K, and kill. Strong I-M-P-A-C-T, too.”

“So they do still kill, just not instantly?”

“Yes,” Danny signed, “they’re fast. They hurt bad. Bad way to die, hurts a lot.”

“Well,” one of the other men in the room piped up, “I guess he’s not completely hopeless.”

“Of course he isn’t,” Mr. Cobblepot replied, fixing a terrifying glare onto the man, “it was my idea to bring him in, after all.”

“Danny,” Mr. Cobblepot said, turning his attention back to him, “we’re going to be collaborating with these fine individuals in the future. I’m going to need twenty guns ready for use in a week. You can handle that, can’t you?”

Danny nodded frantically.

“What kind?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Mr. Cobblepot said, waving his hand dismissively, “semi-automatic is preferable, but handguns and shotguns also work. Just make sure they work perfectly.”

The room was silent for a moment.

“Well, that’s all. You can leave now, and I’ll finish discussing the details with my associates.”

Danny nodded, signing him a quick “thank you, goodbye,” and slipped out of the room alongside Derringer.

They made their way back to Danny’s workshop in silence. Once they were inside, Derringer heaved a heavy sigh, running his fingers through his hair.

“You really think you can make that many guns that quickly, kid?”

“Yes,” Danny replied, “but I need your help.”

Derringer groaned, a smile on his face.

“Of course you’re putting me to work. I should’ve expected it. Now, what do you need me to do?”

“Well, first, hold this…”

—

#dcxdp #dc x dp #dp x dc #dpxdc #dp x dc crossover #dc x dp fic #vengeful danny #villain danny #btw Derringer is named after a type of gun #dw he isn’t the focus forever #I just felt like Danny could use like. a single person who isn’t trying to manipulate him #also I think he would get along very well with the goons :)#aside from. yknow. the whole target thing HDJDNDND #also there IS a lore related reason that his vocal chords can’t recover but the rest of his body can #you just gotta wait to see what it is >:3 #anyways. Arkham time next chapter #Awwawaw

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charlottecutepie · 4 months

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☥ Bunny meat (William Afton x fem!reader x Michael Afton)

Summary: He was a likeable middle-aged man who had wonderful children, his dream job and a beautiful wife. He never blamed himself for his own actions, or to be more exact, he never thought about their consequences.

author note: Ive been thinking for a very long time whether I should publish this fic here. this is my fav fic I wrote for fnaf, I especially like the way I portrayed William here. so please, if any of you would like to see this story here, can you leave a comment? It’ll help me to understand. I’m just unsure if I should post this fic here :’’)

tags: darkfic, unhealthy relationship, angst, smut with plot, p in v, dubcon, oral sex, rough and gentle sex, daddy kink, blood play, knife play, fear play, hurt/comfort, violence, gore/murders, child abuse, follows fnaf lore, moral and physical abuse, virginity kink, anxiety disorder, age gap, daddy issues, unreliable narrator, hallucinations, hidden pairing, William is sick, psychopathy, unhealthy narcissism

Chapter 2.

Chapter 1. Thoughts

Chilly spring night. Light wind and rain. It's so fresh outside that the opposite effect appears: you feel as if you are suffocating from excess air. Outside is your favourite smell of wet grass after the rain. Light smile appears on your lips, and you carelessly go out on the porch of your house, looking at the beautiful view in front of you.

At such moments, everything around seems to be a part of you, you feel some kind of connection with nature and this world. Peace, tranquility, two things what you lack in life.

Today was a bad day. Maybe tomorrow will be better? Tomorrow will be the same. And when will it be better? Does this hell have an end?

Your head is filled with bad thoughts. It feels like every day is getting a little worse than the previous one. You never understood why you deserved such treatment from your father. It was as if he was doing everything so that you wouldn't feel like his daughter. He never even called you that. Something bad happened in your family every day, mom and dad always argued, and you always ran into your room in a state of panic, anxiety. What if father does something to her? That's what happened a few years ago. When you called your aunt in tears, begging her to come, because your father broke your mom's leg and beat her to a concussion. You could have been next if your aunt hadn't arrived on time. That evening, the picture of father changed dramatically in your little child's head.

“Father” means something cold, something cruel. The one who can punch, beat, shout, scream. Abuse.

You live with this thought to this day, but the only thing that has changed is that now there is no father anymore. He died a month ago, which was a shock to your whole little family. You hardly remember what happened exactly on the day of his death, but you clearly memorised your mother who cried all night because she knew well that the only one who could work to feed the family was her husband.

And now, because of this husband she cannot find a well-paid job, because he took care to provide her with a serious disability. And you're too young to work, first you must finish school and university.

Your skin was covered with goosebumps, you went back into the house. Passing by mom's room, you made sure that she was asleep and went to your own one.

Tomorrow is another day.

…

June 22.

“Y/n, breakfast is ready.” you heard mom's voice from the kitchen. Telling her you'd be coming soon, you headed to the bathroom to comb your hair and wash your face.

On the dining table you saw a plate with your favorite breakfast. Pancakes with honey, it couldn't not make you happy. You smiled and sat down opposite your mom. Woman was in a joyful mood.

“Good morning, dear, how did you sleep?” she asked gently, examining your face expression. That's how your conversation started, about everything and nothing at once. She told something about her plans for today, for a week, about her friends, about how one of them gave birth again. You just enjoyed her monologue, sometimes nodding and shaking your head. It was nice for you to see a sparkle in mom's eyes, it was something strange and unique for you, but warming soul. “I absolutely forgot that soon is your birthday!”

“Oh, really? If you hadn't told me, I wouldn't have remembered…” you answered in confusion, fidgeting in your chair and twitching your leg. For some reason, the mention of your birthday made you uncomfortable. Probably because it will be your first birthday without your father. After all, when he was alive, you never really celebrated it. The maximum that was — sweets that your mother gave you in secret from him. You wonder what will happen this time?

“How are we going to celebrate?” Mom asked, smile on her face.

You looked at the floor, nervously fiddling with your shorts. You scratched your head, trying to think of something, but no idea came to mind. Your thoughts are empty again.

“It's your 18th birthday… We need to celebrate it well somehow.” for a second she paused, before looking at you with cheerful face. “Oh… Mr. Afton!”

Your eyes widened in surprise, because after the funeral, your family stopped communicating with Afton family.

“Mom, what are you up to?” you frowned. To be honest, you always got shivers running down your spine from his name, because your last meeting was at that cemetery, on the day of your father's funeral. Memories have entered your mind, forcing you to remember your last dialogue with Mr. Afton.

After the burial itself happened, you ran away from the crowd away. Your heart was racing like crazy, trying to jump out of your chest. You sat down on a wet bench, covering your face in hysterics. Tears streamed down your cheeks, dripping onto a puddle under the bench.

“Young lady,” a low-pitched male voice called you out of hysteria. “Everything is okay? You've been sitting here for hour.”

You opened your eyes and raised your head. Next to you was standing was a tall, middle-aged man with dark brown hair, dressed in black trousers and a jacket. He leaned towards you, holding an umbrella over your head. His face seemed painfully familiar, but because of the hysteria, you couldn't remember who it was.

“Oh god, Y/n? I didn't recognize you, little one. Why are you sitting here all alone?” he smiled broadly as he sat down next to you on the bench, still holding the umbrella for you. “Your mom is looking for you, she's so worried. Her beloved girl is lost.”

You recognised this man. It was none other than William Afton. One of your father's friends, he often came to visit you, and your family also visited him. You were embarrassed by ignoring his questions because you didn't know what to respond. He's been staring at your face the whole time.

“Come on, princess, I see how cold you are.” with these words, he took off his jacket, putting it on your shoulders. “I understand how hard it is for you, honey.”

You haven't received so many nicknames from any men for all your 17 years of life. Never, not once. His voice at some point began to seem more comfortable and soothing. Because of all the surging emotions, you burst into tears again in front of him, no longer hiding your face. William, not wasting a minute, threw umbrella and took you in his arms, so that your face was hidden in his chest. His cold hands stroked your hair, soothing you, calming you. It may have looked strange from out of context, but you really needed support in such hard moment.

“Don't cry, Y/n. You'll be fine, little one.” he talked and talked endlessly, but because of your own tears and sobs, you ignored everything, only burying your nose in his chest more.

“He's the owner of a pizzeria! Do you want to celebrate there? I'm sure he'll give us a discount in honor of such an event.” her smile never disappeared for a second. You were already beginning to doubt at how real her emotions were.

“Are you sure? We don't have much money anyway…”

“Never mind, I want you to finally have the best birthday, dear.” she winked and got up from the table, putting the plates and mugs in the sink.

Your lips curled at the thought of having to see William again.

#william afton smut #fnaf x reader #william afton x reader #steve raglan x reader #fnaf william afton #michael afton x reader #william afton imagines #fnaf x y/n

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dollyhao · 6 months

Text

ameliorate; to make better

pairing: dina x reader

summary: dina is overwhelmed by all the things that happened in seattle…. and ellie, and being a single mother doesn’t make it any easier. when a sweet woman comes to make her life easier...better.

toni's note: there's nothing to warn about besides a bit angst, it doesn't really get angsty till the next part. im hoping i can make this into 3 parts. thank you for 800 followers by the way!

word count: 1k

you hear the sound of a wailing baby as you make your way back home, you follow the sound. you cant be too sure about these kinda things, what if something bad happened. you stumble upon dina rocking baby jj in a rocking chair on her porch, shushing him trying to console him. dina looks tired and overwhelmed, dark circles under her eyes and unbrushed hair.

you approach her gently not wanting to startle her, “hey, can i try?” you give her a gentle smile pointing at jj. dina tucks a piece of hair behind her ear nodding, “y-yea sure. you can try, hes been crying a lot lately.” you reach for jj bouncing and rocking in a comforting rhythm, chanting soft shushes. jj quiets down letting out a calm gurgle. you look back up at dina seeing her rub her hands down her face in an exhausted manner.

she chuckles, “i cant even get my son to be quiet let alone sleep, ellie was really good at that..” she puts her elbows on her knees putting her face in her hands. you stay quiet letting her have her moment, still rocking jj as he starts to doze off. dina seems to regroup, looking back up at you curiously, “would you like to come in? its getting cold out here.” dina offers standing up. “yea, thanks.”

dina walks into the house and you follow, “no. thank you. i appreciate what you did. “ “where’s his bed?” you ask now that jj is fast asleep. “he sleeps with me, the room is down the hall.” you go to the room, laying jj down, making sure hes comfortable before leaving the room. dina is in the kitchen making herself a cup of tea, “would you like some?” she glances at you over her shoulder. “yes please.” you stand awkwardly, hands in your back pockets swaying a little. she nods over to the living room with 2 cups in her hands. you follow taking a seat on the couch as she hands you a cup.

you thank her, taking a sip. “are you new to jackson? i dont remember ever seeing you before.” you chuckle, “no im not new, ive been here for years now.” you give a shy smile. “oh im sorry, i cant believe ive never noticed you.” “its fine. i preferred to stay to myself anyway. i work at the school. im a teacher,” you sit your cup down looking at her, “i always wanted to approach you, i thought you were beautiful. but you were dating jesse and then after you and jesse broke up, you and ellie made a nice little scene at the party.” you chuckle watching her face flush slightly. “also, im sorry about jesse…. and ellie.” she nods, quiet for a minute before replying. “thank you, for the jesse and ellie thing… and for calling me beautiful.” you smile at her.

you look outside seeing how dark it was getting, “i should get going.” you say standing up. dina stands up too, “thank you again. he probably would’ve cried through the night.” “of course, just let me know if you need my help again. ill be happy to help.” you walk backwards as you talk smiling at her until you run into a wall. “ah, shit..” you say rubbing the back of your head. dina laughs and follows you to the door as you turn around and walk correctly. “ill be sure to ask for your help again.” she says giving you a soft, genuine smile.

a week later, you walk into the dining hall as maria is walking out, “hey maria, is there anything you needed from me?” you wanted to make sure there wasn’t something you were suppose to be doing that you forgot about. “no. nothing that i can remember. im about to take this to dina, i wanna make sure shes staying fed.” “ill take it to her!” you say a little too eagerly for your taste. for the last week, you’ve been trying to find any excuse to visit dina and jj when you weren’t busy. dina doesn’t seem to ever object to the company. she appreciates you coming around and talking to her and playing with the baby. so when this opportunity pops up, of course your gonna take it. “let me grab myself a plate and ill take hers to her.” you say taking the plate out her hands. “well ok. thank you.” you smile before walking away.

you get to dina’s door knocking with the two plates in your hands. dina opens the door looking a little breathless, “oh, hey.” she gives you one of her soft smiles shes been giving you quite a lot. “hey, i brought you food. not sure if you ate or not.” “right.. food. i definitely forgot to eat. “ she says rubbing a hand through her hair. she gives another small smile, but this one doesn’t reach her eyes. “thats ok. i have food for you, lets not dwell to much on a honest mistake. k?” she nods. you hear a baby cry in the background, “i see you have two plates. wanna come in and eat? i was just feeding jj.” “id love to” you respond walking in.

you guys walk to the dining table where you find jj in a high chair. “hey baby boy!” you say tickling his belly, he lets out a squeal/giggle. you and dina sit on either sides of him after a minute, you see dina subtly go to smell herself. she lets out a wince, “um do you mind feeding him while i go take a shower.” you nod, “of course.” you say as you slide his food bowl over to yourself. you give dina a reassuring smile letting her know its ok.

when dina gets out the shower and is dressed, she walks in the living room while brushing her hair seeing you and jj on the carpet in her living room playing. she smiles, it felt good being able to enjoy a shower without rushing out to jj. she trusts you with jj almost the way she trusted ellie with him. yall look her way, both you and jj smiling at her. she comes and joins, both of you enjoying the sweet giggles of the cute baby.

(part 1)

#wlw #lesbian #the last of us #dina tlou #dina woodward #dina x reader #tlou2 #dina tlou2 #dina woodward fanfic

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sweetlittlegingy · 2 years

Text

Can't Breath Whenever You're Gone

✦ Previous Chapter | Next Chapter | Better Man Universe

✦Pairing: Father Figure Jake x Single!Mom

✦Word Count: 5.2 k

✦Warnings: Ansty, Fluff, slight smut (Jake calls himself daddy once), pregnancy, deployment, sad Maty

✦A/n: I have tried to post this like 8 times, it better work. I'm sorry for the wait guys, I hope you like it! Lots of love - G

✦Library (Follow for updates! I no longer have a taglist.)

The low ache in your back had become a constant; leaning down to pick up the second batch of laundry, the six-month belly just out of the way. Rising back up, one arm carrying the laundry, the other caressing your more than noticeable bump.

You feel a sharp kick, pressing your palm back into the spot, you can feel Little Miss move, pressing farther into your hand. A laugh falls from your lips, she wasn’t even here yet and she was stubborn just like her father.

The pregnancy came as a surprise, though you weren’t trying to avoid pregnancy, it still was a shock when you found out. The four pregnancy tests you’d taken, after being nauseous every morning for a week, proved that your family was about to grow by one.

The shock of it all, couldn’t stop the nerves from kicking in.

Your pregnancy with Mathew hadn’t been easy. Your nausea lasting the whole 40 weeks, making it hard for you to maintain a healthy weight. You ended up getting weekly IVs from the hospital and being up on two different nausea medications.

In the first trimester, this time nausea hit you hard and at all times of the day, the bathroom had become a second home, and Jake could barely handle it. Constantly at your side, holding your hair or rubbing your back. Mathew had been ecstatic when he found out, though the now six-and-a-half-year-old, had a hard time seeing you so sick.

Even having a conversation with your belly, telling the baby that they needed to be nice to you.

That was before you found out that you were having a girl, and thankfully the nausea had calmed after your fourteen-week mark, making your days actually enjoyable.

You’d been able to find out the sex of your baby just before Jake deployed when you were twenty weeks, and you’d both been thankful he could be with you in person to hear.

He’d been overjoyed when you the doctor told you. The smile never left his face on the drive home. Telling you, now that you had one of each, the next one could be a surprise.

You’d smacked him and told him, you wanted to get through this one before even thinking about another. Jake had only given you a teasing smile and kissed your hand, resting it in his lap for the drive home.

That was a month ago now, and all three of you were missing him terribly. Right after you’d found out you were pregnant; Jake had taken to talking to your stomach nightly. You’d told him that the peanut was too small, but he hadn’t cared. Holding nightly conversations with them, ranging from stories about flying, to what had happened during his day.

You’re sure that Little Miss had gotten used to her daddy’s voice, because now without his nightly talks, she has taken to becoming very active during the night. Mathew was having quite the time with Jake being gone as well. The first week he had cried every night and though his tears had slowed, the month had been wearing on the little guy.

Thankfully school kept his mind busy during the day, and Lacey had promised to call if he got upset during the day. Summer vacation was just around the corner for Maty and though he loved second grade, he was so excited about the year ahead. He was going full-time on base and Auntie Lacey, Bob’s wife, would be his teacher for third grade.

You were thankful for the relationship the two of you had developed over the last 2 years, she’d become one of your closest friends and was always there to help with Mathew.

When she found out that you were expecting and that the boys were getting deployed, she took up a permeant residence in your home. Taking over pick up and drop off completely, saying that your house was on her way to school anyway.

Your house was in fact a good bit out of her way, but you weren’t about to argue with the woman. Bob might have been quiet and shy in public, but his sweet, loving teacher of a wife, was anything but.

Lacey, like her third graders, was an endless ball of energy. She was the most positive person you’d ever met and extremely organized. But when she decided that something was going to happen, then it was happening. Her stubbornness rivaled that of Jakes. A fact that had you cackling, when the two of them bickered.

Placing the laundry away, you head back into the kitchen, looking for something to snack on before you start on dinner. Music streams out of the speaker on the counter, a playlist that you’d made after Jake threw you into the world that is 90’s country, on a trip to Texas. You’d fallen in love with the music, on a night out and always listened to it when Jake was gone.

You hum along to the beat of Brooks and Dunn, swaying your hips along to the music, hand resting on your bump. Little Miss takes to rolling around, clearly enjoying the music.

“You like that one sweetpea?” The song changes and she rolls again. “Your daddy’s gonna be pleased with your taste in music.”

You grab the strawberries out of the fridge, singing along to the music. Your mind wandering, sure that Jake and your little girl would have the exact relationship stated in the song.

“When she was three years old on her daddy's knee, he said you can be anything you want to be. She's a wild one, runnin' free.—”

The ringing of your phone cuts off your singing, Jake’s ringtone cutting through, and has you hurrying to pick it up. He rarely got to call you, the carrier was continuously going in and out of service, making it hard to talk.

You pick up the phone, lowering the volume of the music.

“Baby?”

“Hi, darlin’.” The sound of Jake's voice has you crying, your hormones working against you. The gasp that leaves your lips, alerts Jake of your crying.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

Your hand comes up, brushing the tears from your eyes, doing your best to stop them.

“It’s just my hormones Jakey.” You pause, trying to settle the quiver in your voice. “We just miss you.”

A sad laugh falls from your lips, wedging the phone between your shoulder and ear, you move to sit down. Both of your hands rubbing your swollen bump, calming yourself and Little Miss. She’d noticed you crying, when you were slightly gasping for breath, no doubt disturbing her.

“I know sweets, I’ll be home soon.”

You knew that he couldn’t give you a return date, the both of you silently hoping that it would be before your due date. While it was months away, this last month had gone by fast, and though you hadn’t told Jake, you were worried.

“How is everything? How are my babies?” His voice sounds tired, and you wonder how long it’s been since he’d slept properly.

He’d told you before, that sleeping on the carrier calmed him, and being able to do what he loved made the uncomfortable bed worth it. Though something had changed, shortly after Mathew had started calling Jake daddy, deployments started causing Jake more stress than joy.

He'd told you that he missed the both of you. Missed seeing you and Maty every day, but you could tell that there was more behind it. You hadn’t wanted to push him, but you worried and with you pregnant, the worrying had increased ten-fold.

You relay what had been going on in the last couple of days, and Jake silently listens. Humming occasionally, just happy to hear your voice and feel closer to you.

“She’s been moving around a lot more this last week and I’ve blown up like a balloon.” You’d loved that you could carry your angels, but without Jake here to love on you, your self-esteem had plummeted.

“I look like a damn whale Jake.” The topic causes another onset of tears to converge in your waterline. “And I can’t stop crying.”

“Oh baby, no you are so fucking gorgeous.”

“You can’t even see me, Jacob!” You didn’t mean to snap at him, and before you can apologize, Jake is laughing at you.

“Don’t need to see you, to know how gorgeous you look.” Pure love in his voice and has your tears drying up quickly.

“How did I get so lucky with you Mr. Seresin?” His laugh breaks through the phone, loud enough that it echoes in your quiet living room.

“I’m just that good Mrs. Seresin.”

Though you hadn’t tied the knot yet, the title became one used often. The engagement ring resting on your hand catches the afternoon sunlight and a soft smile graces your lips. “I love you.” The hand creasing your belly receives a sudden push and you watch as Little Miss turns, her outline faint through your tank top.

“I love you too darlin’.” You can hear the smile in his voice and decide to put Jake on speaker. Bringing the phone to your belly, you feel her move towards the sound as Jake tells you about his day.

“Darling, I think that someone is feeling left out of the conversation. I’ve got you resting on the belly and Little Miss is going crazy for her daddy.”

You hear the broken laugh crack through the phone and then you hear a soft sniffle.

“Hi baby girl, daddy misses you and your bubba so much.”

“Oh baby, I didn’t mean to make you cry.”

You hadn’t even thought about how telling Jake that the babies missed him, would make him feel. Though he was soft and sweet in front of you, in comparison to how he was with others, it was a rare sight to see Jake cry.

“No sweetheart, I just hate not being there. She’s never gonna be this little again, and Maty is going to third grade. I feel like I’m missing everything.” The shutter that echoes through the phone, has tears welling up in your eyes.

“I just never realized that it would hurt this much.”

You take a few deep breaths, trying to calm your own tears not wanting Jake to feel even worse, and eventually, you both calm down.

Jake talks to your belly; you sit listening and enjoying the sound of his voice. If you close your eyes, it almost feels like he’s back home with you. Though your conversation is cut short, when you hear Bradley over the phone. Muffled voices ring over the phone, grunting and you swear you hear someone yell ouch, before Bradley’s voice yells out your name.

“Hi B, how are you?” You can’t help the laugh that breaks from you when you hear, Bradley telling Jake that he has to share. That he needed to check on his little sister and Jake could get over it. That thought is followed by the sound of a smack and Bradley whining over the phone.

“He’s mean with he’s not with you, Y/n. Control your husband.”

“He’s not my husband yet B.” You’re laughing at their antics, not having laughed this much since they left.

“No, he’s yours Y/n. No givebacks, his receipt clearly states non-returnable.”

The phone once again is dropped, and then you hear a door slammed. You were happy that they had each other, and knowing that they were together lessened your anxiety. They might fight like siblings, but they’d developed an unbreakable bond over the years.

It’s Jake's voice that comes across the phone once again, “I’ve gotta go, baby.”

The both of you are quiet for a moment longer, the lightheartedness of Bradley showing up suddenly gone.

“I don’t know when I’ll get to call you again sweetheart.”

Your heart slightly cracks, and the reality of your current situation sets in. Jake was in the middle of the ocean and not just for drills, but for an actual mission that could end horribly.

“I know.” You hate the way your voice cracks, hate that you are inevitably making Jake feel worse.

“Given Mathew a kiss for me Sweets.”

You hum quietly, too afraid to speak knowing that your voice would break. You’re both waiting, making the call last as long as possible, but Jake eventually breaks the peaceful silence.

“I love you, Sweets.”

“I love you too, Jacob.” The tears from your waterline fall, and you don’t bother to stop the sniffle that leaves you.

“You’ve gotta hang up baby, or we’ll never get off.”

Your heads nodding, even though Jake can’t see it, hating that he always made you hang up. It’d become a thing when you’d first became friends and now it was natural.

“You come home to us Jacob Grant Seresin.”

Your finger hits the end button before Jake has the chance to reply. Slowly bringing the phone down to sit in your lap, you can’t stop the tears as they stream down your face. It was never easy being away from Jake, but right now, at this moment you couldn’t remember a time when your heart hurt worse.

Sobs rack through your body, your hands faintly shaking as you lay down on the couch. Clutching the decorative pillow to your chest with one hand, your other rubs comforting circles onto your swollen belly.

…

You hadn’t realized you’d fell asleep until you hear the front door opening. Your eyes aching, the tears you’d shed emotionally draining you, and you wanted nothing more than to go to sleep for the night. Though the padding sound of small feet, has you rubbing your eyes trying to hide how much you’d been crying.

“Mommy!”

Mathew rushes towards you, a smile on his face as he goes straight to your belly. Lacey’s figure follows behind him, and you give her a warm smile.

“How was school?” You ask the both of them, though Maty is too busy talking quietly to your stomach. Rubbing in the place where his sister had just kicked, and places a soft kiss on the spot, before continuing to tell her about his day.

“It was good, happy that it’s the weekend though. Plus, Bobby called me at lunch, so thank was nice.” The smile that graces her face as she mentions Robert, has you smiling at the girl. The sight of her quietly spinning the wedding band on her finger, makes you feel not so lonely.

“Jake called today too.”

The mention of his name has Mathew’s attention instantly, no longer interested in telling Little Miss about his day.

“Daddy called?”

His voice is so hopeful, and you feel horrible that he wasn’t home, causing him to miss the chance to talk to Jake. They had only been able to talk once while Jake had been gone, and you could tell that it upset the both of them. Their schedule never seemed to match up, or the boat was just out of service. The one call had been a happy coincidence, having kept Mathew home from school after being up all night.

Which had been a problem in itself.

Mathew’s nightmares had slowed down massively since you’d gotten together with Jake, he’d filled a void that Mathew had, and now with him gone, it was like the void had reappeared.

You’d given up the idea of Mathew sleeping in his room, after the first week and brought him into bed with you. The both of you slept better having the other close, and the nightmares had slowed, though not gone away.

“Yeah, sweetheart.” A sad smile graces your face when you see how Mathew’s face drops. “Daddy said to tell you that he loves you so much though, and that he will be home soon.”

Mathew's faces drops, tucking himself into your belly and gives you a soft nod. Your hand combs through his hair, comforting him as much as possible. The tears that you feel wetting your shirt, have you pulling him up into your lap.

You see Lacey give you a sad smile, as she points to the door and tells you to call her later. Your mouth a thank you, while rocking Mathew back and forth. His tears eventually slow and turn into hiccupping sounds. He pulls away from your chest, a tear-stained face and you almost start crying again.

You give him a reassuring smile, hand brushing through his hair, and plant a kiss on his forehead.

“Daddy will be home soon, I promise buddy.”

“He’s saving people, right momma?”

“Yeah baby.”

This time it’s you that’s pulling him into your chest, doing your best not to cry in front of him. Tucking your head down to rest on top of his head, rocking the both of you to stop the tears.

The three of you had went to bed early that night, watching Toy Story in bed, and having family cuddles. You wrapped in one of Jake’s shirts and boxers, while Mathew clung to the blue plane blanket from Jake. His steady breathing calms you and lulls you into your own deep sleep.

…

One Month Later

You had officially reached 7 months and Mathew was starting his first week of summer vacation. May had flown by and you couldn’t believe that summer had finally started. Though California was warm year-round, the rising heat had been hell. You couldn’t seem to get cool, and your swollen stomach was always adorned in a sun dress.

Jake was still deployed, though Penny had mentioned that there was a possibility that they were coming home soon. Apparently, Mav had slipped up while talking to her, and she couldn’t keep it from you. She’d sworn you to secretly, meaning you couldn’t tell Lacey or Mathew, though you wouldn’t want to tell Mathew just yet. You were careful what you mentioned about the deployment to Maty, he and Jake were able to talk a few times within the last month, but he was still sensitive to the topic of Jake coming home.

You had your 7-month checkup today and Lacey was going to be picking the pair of you up, to take you. Walking from your shared bedroom, you call out from Mathew, wanting to make sure that he was at least somewhat matching.

He’d taken to picking out his clothes, stating that he was a big boy now and in charge of taking care of the house. A thought Jake had put into his head during their last conversation. Now that he was a big boy, that meant he could pick out his own clothes.

Peaking into his bedroom, you see him pulling a navy shirt over his head, happily surprised that the shirt parried well with his khaki shorts.

“You ready bubba? Auntie Lacey will be here soon.”

The turn of his little body towards you, has a look of concern painting your face as you see the pout marring Mathew's own.

“I can’t find my glasses momma, the ones like daddy’s.” His tone was clearly distressed and missing the sunglasses that matched Jake's own pair.

“Did you look on the counter sweetheart, I saw them there last night.”

A small shake of the head is all he replies before his legs are carrying him to the kitchen. Following behind him, much slower, you hear an “aha!” ring out that causes you to laugh. Coming to rest behind him, you gently kiss his head, when a knock sounds from your door. You hear the door open, and Lacey’s voice sounds out.

“Hellooooo, anybody home.”

“In the kitchen Lace.” Her figure rounds the corner of the kitchen and Mathew is hugging her instantly.

“How is my favorite nephew?”

A giggle erupts from Mathew’s chest and Lacey gives him a tight squeeze. “I’m your only nephew Auntie.”

She gives him a glance, acting as though she’s offended. “That may be so Mr. Mathew, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be my favorite as well.”

Her hands drift to his waist, picking him up and then promptly tickling him. The both of them giggling, as you watch on with a fond smile. Lacey’s presence in your life, especially in the last two months, was a true gift and one that you could never truly repay. Though you knew that when she got pregnant, you would be at her side, just like she was for you.

Reaching for your purse, you check the time and see that its 12:20 and your appointment starts at 1 on the dot.

“Come on you two, we’ve got an appointment to get to.”

Lacey ushers you in front of her, still carrying Mathew out to her car, and buckling him into the booster seat that she’d bought for him.

“We get to go see sissy today, right momma.”

Looking back at Maty, the biggest smile rests on his face. You’d told him at the being of the week, you’d had an ultrasound and that he could come into the appointment and see his sister with you.

“Yes, sweetie.” You give him a smile, before buckling up, as Lacey pulls from your driveway.

The car ride is short and filled with music, enjoying the breeze of the day. The drive to the clinic doesn’t take long and before you know it, you’re making your way in, ten minutes before your appointment.

Going to the front desk you give them your name, while Mathew holds your hand silently observing. The buzzing of Lacey’s phone has her apologizing before she heads outside to answer the call. You think nothing of her excusing herself, thinking that she’s only left in consideration of the other patients.

Your name is called and though Lacey isn’t back inside yet, you and Mathew head back with the nurse. She takes your vitals and asks you to lay on the table, handing you a blanket to rest over your lap. You mention that Lacey had to step outside, and the nurse tells you that she will bring her back when she comes back into the office. She gives you and Mathew a smile before she leaves the room.

Doctor Jones is punctual as always and greets the both of you happily, asking you to raise your dress so that she can start. The ultrasound goes well, Doctor Jones answered each question that Mathew had and stated Little Miss is doing wonderful.

“She’s measuring just ahead of schedule, looking to be about 30 weeks, so 2 weeks ahead. We will keep an eye on it, but as of today, I think we can expect her around mid-August.” Her eyes leave yours to look back at Mathew, “Just before school starts buddy!”

His eyes light up in excitement, “Time for daddy to be home too!”

Doctor Jones looks back to you, both of your smiles faltering slightly.

“Yes, baby. Daddy’s got lots of time to get home.”

The doctor goes over a few things to watch out for, before sending you on your way. The sonogram image of Little Miss clutched in Mathew's hands excited to show Lacey. The nurse leads you back out into the main office, and Lacey is sitting waiting for the both of you. Her smile is massive and more than excited to see the image Mathew holds up in front of her face.

Your hand rests on your belly, and a few sharp kicks have you sucking in a breath, ready to get in the car to sit down for a bit.

“Are we ready to head out?” Lacey is rising to meet you, holding Maty’s hand to walk across the parking lot and the other resting on the small of your back. You give her a gracious smile, muttering a small yes.

The drive home is quick, your body is already tired from the day, and the small nap you had taken while driving is suddenly interrupted.

“Daddy!”

Your eyes shoot open, and there in your front yard are Jake and Robert waiting. Mathew is flying out of the car as soon as Lacey is parked, and you can’t stop the tears from falling as you look over at Lacey speechless.

“Did you know?”

“You think I would have left that appointment, if the phone call hadn’t been important.” The teasing smile she gives you, has you laughing through the tears. Giving her a hand a squeeze, a silent thank you, before opening the car door. The door stops before you can get it fully open, your eyes meeting a pair of black boots.

Following the uniform up, your eyes finally settle on Jake.

Your Jake, with Mathew resting on his hip. The onset of tears is never ending, as sobs uncontrollably fall from your lips.

Jake falls to his knees, setting Mathew on the ground and telling him to go see Uncle Bob, his hands reach out brushing the tears from your cheeks.

“Hi Sweets.”

Your figure moves for him, arms wrapping around his neck as you sob into his chest. He mutters sweet nothings into your hair, brushing his hand up and down your spine. The other one falls to rest on your belly.

“Your home? You’re really here?” Your voice sounds so small and Jake's heart sightly aches at your question.

“I’m home baby. Not leaving you again Sweets.”

You miss the promise in his voice, only hearing his confirmation that he was here, with you and your babies finally. Your tear-stained face pulls back from Jake's chest and your hands are pulling his face down to yours instantly.

Lips meeting, slotting perfectly together after 8 long weeks apart. The tears coating your cheeks are no longer yours alone, pulling back you see tears lining Jake’s eyes. The smile he gives you, has you tugging him back down to your lips. His lips separate from your own lips; to your cheeks and jawline, peppering your face with kisses. Then moves down to your swollen bump and places a gentle kiss upon it as well.

You look up and see Lacey’s tear-stained face, Robert cradling her in his arms. The both of them enjoying the moment, as a small body comes tumbling back into Jake. His face moves from your bump, and he grabs Mathew tickling him, laughter falling from all three of your lips.

“Daddy, we saw sissy today!”

The photo Mathew still hadn’t let go is shoved at Jake, a large smile breaking onto his face as he grasps the sonogram. His hand moves to brush through Maty’s hair, bringing the little boy back into his chest, as he stares at the picture. His eyes move from the image, to your bump, and back to the image.

Jake brushes a kiss against Mathew’s head, then goes to stand up. His hand reaching out for you.

“Coming on darlin’, let’s get you three inside.”

His arms wrap around your waist and for a moment you fear that this is all a dream, that soon you’ll wake up in Lacey’s car, utterly alone.

You feel the hand on your waist give you a squeeze, your eyes meeting Jake's. Your foreheads rest against each other before a quick kiss is exchanged and you’re heading into the house.

Robert and Lacey stayed for dinner that night, the five of you deciding to order in pizza instead of trying to cook. You and Lacey worked in tandem cleaning up the kitchen, as the guys took Mathew out back to play.

He’d been so patient during dinner, eating a slice of pizza, then begged Jake and Robert to play. The guys had informed you that Mav and Penny were having a BBQ tomorrow night, celebrating a successful mission and that everyone was required to come.

You called Penny just after dinner, asking what she needed you to bring tomorrow, though she adamantly said you weren’t supposed to bring anything. After going back and forth, your sister eventually caved and told you to let Mathew pick out a dessert from the store. You complied and let Jake know that the three of you would need to stop by the store tomorrow, before going over.

Jake had walked Bob and Lacey to the door, telling them thanks for coming over, as well as thanking Lacey profusely for helping you while he was gone. The woman just patted him on the back, with a shrug of her shoulders, and stated that’s what family does. Giving her a nod, and then a wave to them both, he headed back in to find you leaning over the kitchen counter.

Sneaking up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist to settle just under your bump. With a lift of his hands, a moan left your lips, and you were settling back into his body. Your head leaned back, resting on his shoulders as the tension in your lower back dissipated.

“So good.”

A hum leaves his lips in acknowledgment of you before his lips meet the side of your neck. He traces a line of hot open mouth kisses along your neck, landing on the spot between your collarbone and neck. Sucking softly, on a mission to mark you after months away.

The haze in your mind is overwhelming as you push back against Jake, the feeling of his hardened length pressing into your lower back. You’d missed him so much and now with his hands on you, you felt like you could combust.

“Jake, what about Mathew?” You didn’t want him to stop, but you’d rather get Maty to bed before he saw just how his sissy was made.

Jake places one final kiss on your neck, before gently lowering your bump again, the weight of it settling in your back.

“I’ll go put him to bed, missed our nighttime routine, and you go get ready for bed.” You give him a questioning glance, one eyebrow-raising.

“Bed?” Your tone is slightly whiny and causes Jake to laugh. Turning your body to face him, he gives you a final kiss that has your toes curling.

“Bed darlin’,” His hand creeping up the inside of your thigh, underneath the sun dress, fingers grazing your clothed cunt. “You’ve got a long night ahead of you Sweets.” His fingers tease you, slip under your panties to run along your slit. Your legs tremble, hand clinging to his wrist, afraid that he’s going to pull away.

Jake smirks at you, so wound-up for him and he’d just barely touched you. The swirl of his finger on your clit has your head dropping back. He loved that you were always so needy for him, but you’d become exceptionally horny while pregnant. The pressure of his fingers leaves your clit, and a whine falls from your chest. Though the sound abruptly turns into a moan, when he sinks the digits into your heat.

“Jakey, —”

“I know baby. Such a good girl, fucking yourself on my fingers.”

His tone is condescending as he watches you push down into his hand. Though before you get anywhere, his fingers are gone and your eyes snap open. Watching as Jake licks your slick from the two fingers, pulling you in for a kiss that has you moaning. The tangy taste coating your tongue and making your arousal even more evident between your thighs.

The tap on your ass, has you pulling away. Your eyes blown out and filled with pure need, as you look at Jake.

“You’re not gonna be sleeping tonight, Sweets. Daddy has lots of time to make up for.”

#better man universe #jake seresin #jake hangman seresin #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin x you #hangman #gingy writes #top gun #top gun: maverick #top gun maverick #jake seresin fluff #jake seresin smut #jake hangman seresin x you #jake seresin fanfiction #jake seresin fic #jake seresin x y/n #hangman imagine #jake seresin top gun #jake seresin angst

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octal-alchemist · 3 months

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Want to go on T but hate needles?

I hesitated to start HRT for a long time because of my paralyzing fear of needles, and the stories I heard about testosterone in pill form. However. I'm now 101 days on testosterone!!

Here's my experience with testosterone gel!! (Spoiler: I highly recommend it.)

___________________________________________

At the start, I was applying one pump of gel to each upper arm and using the back of a spoon to spread and rub the gel in (carefully marked "t spoon" and stored with my testosterone gel). I was advised to only use the unbroken skin of my upper arm, and to carefully wash my hands after applying.

(Most side-effects associated with testosterone gel come from accidentally eating it, because most people rub the gel into their arm using their hands. Gel on hands then transfers to mouth. I try to avoid that by applying with a spoon! I do rinse the spoon and wash my hands anyway to be extra safe.)

After rubbing the gel into my arms w the spoon, I held up my arms and walked around T-posing for like ten minutes so that the gel could dry before I put on a shirt.

Initially I wasn't rubbing it in enough with the spoon, and I would see a white film on my skin after drying. Nowadays I rarely see that. The gel smells strongly of alcohol, similar to hand sanitizer, so that's also unpleasant. I've gotten used to it.

For the first week, (and ONLY the first week), I would see a rash appear on my arms after applying the gel. The rash was sudden and painful, but would disappear after 20 minutes. I also experienced two reynaud's attacks while the gel was drying during that first week. (I often have reynaud's attacks when anxious, and it was winter, so I think that's not the gel's fault.)

After that first week I never rashed again, and there haven't been any more reynaud's attacks during application.

What changes have I seen while using t gel?

Voice: After 4 weeks, my voice was noticeably different. Not so much deep, but sort of? wider? and my voice was cracking a lot. In the last 10 weeks it has been becoming smoother, richer, a bit deeper. I absolutely hated my voice four months ago, but now I get a bit of euphoria everytime I hear myself.

Emotions: From weeks 2 to 8, I experienced frequent fits of anger, irritability, crying, and horniness. Very weird to me because I'm usually levelheaded and have no sex drive. However!! in the last six weeks, even though we raised my dose, ive rarely been angry or horny. I also haven't been getting depressed, and increasingly I feel like I can cope with stress. I haven't cried in about five weeks. I spend most of my time feeling content. Every part of me feels better and healthier.

Muscle: I haven't been working out more than usual (oops), but I can see that my arms are becoming more toned. Won't share the photos because they're goofy but I keep doing the 💪 thing at myself while my t gel is drying.

Periods: I have still continued to menstruate regularly, having 3 periods in the last 101 days. My cycles were already on the long side at 35 days. However, those first two periods on T were painless and incredibly short; I bled for two days the first time and 11 hours the second time, and experienced no cramps, no dizziness, no migraines. (The most recent period was two days long but i did have cramps and a migraine T_T. Doc says it's because I raised my dose right beforehand, and I should stop menstruating entirely soon.)

Hair: I already had a bit of scruff on my neck pre-T, but that was mostly just on one side. I now have thick patches of hair under my chin on both sides and the chin itself is starting to fill in. My longest hairs are 5cm but curl. There are coarse hairs appearing by the edge of my lips. I have also noticed that my leg hair is becoming more coarse, and my right nipple has become a forest. Only my right nipple, for some reason! Very few people in my family are bald, but I was still a little worried so I've been keeping track of hair loss on my scalp; however it has been the same amount as usual. Hair still thick.

Blood test results: My pre-T testosterone level was 56. I was told that 2-70 are normal readings for a cis woman. At my 3 month checkup, my testosterone level was 251!! This is still low for a cis man my age (normal is like 650-800), and I wanted a bit more, so the doctor agreed to increase my dose two weeks ago.

Confidence: I am thrilled to see mirrors lately. My jaw seems more defined with the bit of hair to shadow it; my eyes are happier. I keep flirting with myself, partially to hear my own voice. I talk to my students about transitioning, and although a couple have been a bit transphobic, I've been able to laugh about it. I've gone on a couple dates and actually felt attractive and worthy of attention. I feel alive.

Bottomline -

testosterone gel is working wonders for me. I wish I'd known about this nine years ago, when I first tried to go on HRT. Instead, I injected myself with testosterone twice and took myself to the ER over the panic attack I had 🫠 (I don't miss being 19!)

I'm still a stressy motherfucker, and it feels so much safer and more comfortable to apply medicine externally. I know about the dangers of transference, so I apply the gel with a spoon and wear the same long-sleeved shirt throughout the day, careful not to expose others to the gel.

I have so much farther to go, but it actually feels possible now. Easy, even.

If you want to know anything more about this, please, please ask me!! I have anon on, as well!

#testosterone gel #ftm hrt #hormone therapy #non-binary #nonbinary #idk how to tag but i want people to find this. i want it to help #ftx hrt #transmasc #transgender #ask me anything #101 days on testosterone

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mistydeyes · 10 months

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building blocks and alphabet letters

┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ��┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊

summary: You and Kyle met in daycare. Contrary to popular belief, he wasn't quite the genius he was today. In fact, the first time he met you dad was when he was shoving toy blocks in his mouth. He hates that story but he'll make an exception for his young daughter who is terrified of school.

pairing: Gaz x fem!Reader (established relationship)

warnings: none :) just some good ol' fluff!

a/n: want more cute fluffy fics of the 141 being dads? I GOTCHU COVERED RIGHT HERE!! dad simon with two daughters has me hooked

┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊

You first met Kyle in daycare school. You couldn't have been more than 2 or so. This daycare took care of kids while their parents worked and tried to teach them something between snack time and playtime. Your father was with you that day and you had to show him what you learned over the school year. As you sat, perfectly pointing out each of the letters of the alphabet, you were distracted by another boy your age. "Honey, look over here," your father beckoned, trying to get your attention. But all you could pay attention to was the kid shoving blocks in his mouth while his mother helplessly tried to stop him.

Kyle hates that story with a passion. Every time you threaten to mention it, he gets red and demands you not to. To you though, it's cute seeing how his ears get pink and how he scrunches his nose. After 18 years of friendship and 7 years of dating, he's gotten used to your antics. This time, the story has a purpose. Instead of a drunk bar story, it's now something to relax your young daughter from her nerves about going to school.

By now your daughter was 4 and was frightened at the idea of leaving your familiar home. She was a spitting image of Kyle and loved the outdoors. You would always tease that Kyle was meant to be a girl dad. He was having a hard time now as he was trying to convince her to go tomorrow. "Ives, we talked about this, you're going to school tomorrow," Kyle began to say and you could see your daughter's lip begin to quiver. Kyle had been home for three weeks now and all your daughter wanted to do was spend time with the both of you. The last few weeks of trips to the cinema, the park, and going out to eat were coming to an end for her and it was apparent she was not happy about it.

"But I want to stay with Mummy and Daddy," she cried as she hugged you both tight. You gave Kyle a look of sadness at your daughter's wails. In between her tears, she choked out, "Daddy's never home I want to be here!" This time when you looked at Kyle, he wore the same expression of sadness.

"Sweetie, did I ever tell you how Mummy and I met?" Kyle asked and she turned to face him. As she wiped off her tears with her small hands, Kyle went into the story. "When I was only 2 years old, my Mummy and Daddy had to go to work and I couldn't stay at home," he began and had your daughter's full attention. She looked at him with her brown eyes and he sat her in his lap. "But it was okay because I met Mummy! She was the smartest kid there and we had so many adventures on the playground," you smiled fondly as he continued. "Mummy can tell you that Grandad thought I was an odd kid because I would shove blocks in my mouth, but Mummy was still my friend." he finished and gave you both a kiss on the forehead. "And look at Mummy and Daddy now! If I never went to school then I would never have met Daddy and we wouldn't have you," you finished and your daughter seemed to calm down. "Okay, only cause you went, I go," she said triumphantly and you three cheered in excitement.

Later that night when you put Ivy to bed, you and Kyle went downstairs to enjoy the rest of the night. "I didn't think you would ever tell her that story," you joked as you sat on the couch. "It was necessary," he replied and you both shared a laugh. "I still have the picture!" you said and scrolled to your phone to find it. In the photograph, sat you and your father smiling with an alphabet book and Kyle in the background, crying as his mother confiscated the blocks. "Never show anyone that," he jokingly threatened as he took your phone away. You got into a pillow fight as you fought over the picture and ended by resting on his chest again. "Mind telling that story again?" you asked and Kyle looked at you, curiously. "Never," he said and crossed his arms childishly. "Oh really? Not even for our second?" you smirked. It took Kyle all of two seconds to realize what you had just said. He embraced you and you told him you found out the news yesterday. As you lay in bed that night, Kyle thanked everything in the universe for letting you meet all those years ago.

#kyle gaz garrick #gaz x reader #kyle garrick x reader #task force 141 x reader #task force 141 #cod x reader #call of duty modern warfare #cod mwii #modern warfare 2 #call of duty #mw2 imagine #madebyizzie #gaz imagine #kyle garrick imagine #izzie is writing

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soquimic · 7 months

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some things i’ve manifested using the law of assumption —note that i’ve been using it to manifest for years, i was around 8 or 9, so it’s a lot—

1- when i was 8, i remember leaving the church and going home. i really wanted to go to the mall that day because it was almost xmas eve and there’s a lot of activities in my country, i also wanted to see the big xmas tree by the electric stairs. i remember that i affirmed everyday only one affirmation, i didn’t pay attention but lately i realized that ive always been living in the end and didnt realize because my affirmation stated the desire already fulfilled. i affirmed the whole day, i even went to the backyard and looked at the sky as if i was talking with god or something similar. i started affirming around 11 am and by 5 pm my mom was getting ready and i asked her “where are you going?” and she literally told me: i received your school grades, they are all good for me so im taking you to the mall. i lived happily the whole week because i thought that was my first encounter with god or something 😂😂

2- this was in my freshman or sophomore year, i really cant remember the time really well in this one but i do remember that my friend and i had fought and i was really scared because he ignored me everyday and we used to be really close so i reminded my subconscious everyday for like 3 days straight that they were not mad, they were just dealing with stuff or busy (yeah the gaslighting 😘😘) and nah, by day 4 he talked to me again and everything was back to normal like nothing happened.

3- food. yes, the thing i manifest the most is food because i adore eating. i used to live with the assumption: my mom is bringing me chocolate/cheesecake or pizza from work today. EVERY WEEK. and it would happen, i got used to it and stopped assuming random things that had to do with food.

i cant remember any other one, dementia patient right here 🚶🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️

as for my recent ones, ive got a bunch. im a very anxious person and tbh manifesting before was way easier than now. the pressure is killing me but i still managed to manifest stuff from 2021 to this day.

1- a boyfriend. yes, i manifested a boyfriend around april 2021. i didnt go into detail but he had everything i was looking for + he was amazing (at first ofc), he later changed and i had to start attending to therapy sessions cause i got diagnosed and im still traumatized. i forgot to script the loyalty part… so yeah he definitely did cheat and gaslit me. but he made me feel amazing while it lasted. we broke up around 2 months ago and we had 2 years together. i didnt manifest the break up, he did. which is good. the universe sent me signs cause days later after the break up i found out messages and stuff of him cheating the same week of the break up.

2- i manifested for my attachment to go away. note: im the type of person to get attached emotionally to people, i was emotionally depending on my ex, so as soon as we broke up i had a dream where somebody told me to just go out the day after and spoil myself. buy whatever i want and spend some money cause i was working so hard to buy the flight to go and see him. 4 days later when i found out he was with another person i cried in my way to work and i was feeling so well that day that i literally did my hair and makeup but it got smudged :(( but that was the last and first time i cried over him after everything was over. next day i woke up feeling positive and i suddenly let everything go. bad people eventually get what they deserve in life so i just got over it and im not attached to him or the old story anymore!!

3- i manifested new friends plus i contacted my old friends back. most of them were in bad terms with me cause i blocked them out of nowhere because of my ex, everything was so messed up but they forgave me and they are very good friends after all, they text me and hype me up every day so i cannot be more grateful :D

4- i manifested my sp :D after these 2 months i thought to myself: if that person could move on, you can too. so i did, although my sp and me are not fully prepared for a relationship rn, we’re both aware of our mutual attraction and promised to give us time until we were both fully healed 🫶🏻

5- MONEYYYYYY. yeah it sounds like im too ambitious when it comes to money but im soooo silly. i spend everything i get plus i need to pay for my own stuff at school. i dont like bothering my parents with my expenses —even though they are supposed to provide for me but i feel like a problem when i do that so—, i manifested money like 4 times this year??? first, my parents never give me more than 100 for my birthday and all of a sudden they gave me 500$??? i even posted about it my happiness was out of the roof. i went to the cinema w my friends to watch an anime movie that got released on my birthday yayayaya. later, i started working and got like 1,200 in the summertime and now i manifested more money this week TO SAVE. i literally by assuming got into the void and manifested a bag full of money. i wont stfu about it IM AMBITIOUS in a good way with money, i need to move out and start building my future (bro im still 17 😔)

6- clothes and makeup. uMmm im not a fan of makeup tbh buttttt i wanted to have some in case one day i decide to put some on, my skin has always been clear and pretty, my lashes are super long and my eyebrows are really thick so i only worry about doing a perfect lip combo. i got a box and 2 bags full of makeup <3 especially makeup of my favorite brands 😙😙😙 i also was able to buy clothes online very similar to the ones that i had on my pinterest boards ^^ but i kinda forgot to buy shoes.. BFFR 😭😭😭 ive been repeating the same 5 shoes, but im gonna buy some new ones soon!!

7- colognes and jewelry 😘😘😘😘😘 yes, im a fan of these too!! my dad gave me a box full of earrings and rings. but not any kind of earrings, LONG AND BIG EARRINGS W UNUSUAL DESIGNS just how i like them. and some cute rings w rabbit, figures, etc. the colognes smell really well!! i got the nicki minaj perfume in all versions, dior colognes and a box with like 8 different types of victoria’s sprays 🚶🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️🚶🏻‍♀️

8- a good school year. its only been a month but ive made friends and i find a lot of people WHO SUDDENLY KNOW ME, waving at me in the hallways and im like OH YEAH HI even tho idk who they are?? it feels so goodddddd i feel like an it girl omg 😭😭😭 and also my grades are MAGNIFIC, i got accepted in our honors program and im currently a staff cadet in our military program I DID NOT EVEN KNOW IT WOULD BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO ACQUIRE A HIGH RANK HERE BUT I DID ITTTT I DID ITTTT IM LEADING :D

yeah i cant remember more but thats all i’ve accomplished so far, see u dont need the void to fucking manifest 🥱🥱🥱🥱 gurllll-

#law of assumption #manifestation #affirmations #void state #manifesting #success story

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kalcifers-blog · 18 days

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IRIS FILES - ROBBIE THE ZOMBIE

CW - Physical/Mental Deterioration, Derealization, Rotting Alive, Zombification, Bugs/Insects, Medical Horror

Word Count: 994

Character Count: 4,271

CLASSIFICATION: ALTR 181502

ALTR AGE: 24 YRS OLD

ALTR HEIGHT: 5 “5

ALTR SEX: X

ALTR STATUS: UNSTABLE

ALTR INFO: 18152 contracted an unknown illness after an encounter with ALTR 114209. He was advised to keep track of his symptoms in the form of a journal; IRIS Researchers have secured the journal to track 18152's both physical and mental development.

08/09/2016

“Not been great lately, I've had cold or flu symptoms for the past two weeks, really has been messing with my focus, not great for when I'm trying to study or play as well as I usually can but I've been pushing through it!

I'm still a bit shaken up from that creepy ass guy from last month- it messed with me. I'm glad IRIS is here to help out with my case tho, hopefully they catch the freak. I keep getting all fidgety and anxious whenever I'm out in public. I mean I guess that's normal after something like that but still, doesn't make it easier. I would hang out with friends to make me feel safer but I don't wanna get them sick, hopefully this'll pass

-R”

15/09/2016

“God my head will not stop pounding, I got my headache about 2 days ago, it started off only occasionally but god it just keeps flaring up and more often. My flu hasn't gotten any better. It makes it hard to do anything, I keep getting by, slowly but surely.

-R”

22/09/2016

“Been bed ridden this week- I thought rest would probably help but, every time I sleep I keep dreaming of that guy- I don't remember it fully and it's probably just some weird trauma thing but he keeps.. I don't really know how to describe it? He keeps warping. I don't know its probably just some dream shit”

29/09/2016

“haven't been able to eat properly.. keep feeling this itch on my neck, its not bad just annoying mostly. My phone hurts my eyes. Keep dreaming of creeper.im sure he didn't actually look like that. Sorry for the bad handwriting, I'm so tired nd my hands hurt. Might try sleeping again”

30/09/2016

“woke up and puked, pretty badly too- dreaming of that guy hurts my head”

05/10/2016

“Really should call a doctor I think. I did call IRIS, I'm sure I did, they said they'd send someone over. No one came- my body hurts, everywhere it's just this dull ache. I might try

and shower or something. I don't know what to do at this point- no ones coming I've waited and waited and no one showed. The itching got worse, I don't know what's wrong with me I just need someone to come help”

“Why is no one answering my calls???”

12/10/2016

“Tried to shower, clumps of my hair just- came out. I just cried something is wrong with me I called IRIS again I told them it was urgent and I need help. The creeper answered me. It couldn't have been real- but it made me throw my phone accidentally. It broke and I can't get it to work again. I can't keep going on like this. The itching keeps spreading too- it now feels like things are crawling in my organs. I can't scratch there”

“Threw up again, mostly blood- it was clumpy, I think it was bits of my throat. It hurts my throat to breathe let alone talk”

16/10/2016

“The man in my room can't be here- I didn't let anyone in, he shouldn't be here”

23/10/2016

“I found out why I feel like there things crawling in me. I threw up a dead bug. The itching keeps going. I think I need to leave”

“I left my apartment. The air stung and I felt everyone's eyes on me. I don't care i just need help”

“IRIS won't let me in. Or near anyone.”

30/10/2016

“They're keeping me here. They keep giving me things. They poked IVs in me- the skin just teared away. It hurt so much, it feels good to actually be given medication. It's not kicked in yet but I think it should soon. The nurse gave me a funny look when I described my creep to him. I don't know, I just wanna sleep”

IRIS Supplemental:

ALTR 181502, previously known as Robert “Robbie” James, was announced as clinically dead to the public on 05/11/2016. Within the IRIS Foundation however it should be known that ALTR 181502, while maintaining a “corpse-like” appearance, is very much alive. IRIS researchers and medics have been working on a plausible theory on the rapid and alarming decline in ATLR 181502’s health after an apparent encounter with ALTR 114209. This variation of effects with 114209 seems to be an outlier. But until a working theory has been confirmed, the containment is highly necessary for both ALTR 181502 and for the wider public. Some IRIS staff have left due to unknown illnesses after contact with ALTR 181502. Their symptoms are yet to be examined but they are all in highly secure quarantine zones until they are confirmed to not be carrying a “Zombie Virus” as the research staff seem to be calling it.

As for ALTR 181502- exact details of his initial encounter with ALTR 114209 are documented in his original report to IRIS. His condition remains unpleasant. And it seems the best we can hope for is to keep him in containment until we understand what's going on.

The journal, as well as the remainder of ALTR 181502's belongings have been quarantined or burned. We managed to digitise his IRIS issued journal for the research sake. In said journal we believe the figure he describes is ALTR 114209- as it is within it's behaviour to torment it's victims while they are in mental distress.

It was discovered, by one such medic, after attempting an autopsy on ALTR 181502, that he is very much no longer human. If the hive of moth larvae that has eaten away at all of his organs have anything to say about it at least. How he still is living, albeit not pleasantly, is about as good a guess as yours as it is mine.

End Supplemental.

#jacksepticeye #jse egos #jse #jacksepticeye egos #robbie the zombie #jse robbie #fanfic #IRIS Files #Kalcifers IRIS Files #horror fic #my fic

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bengiyo · 4 months

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15 people, 15 questions

I got tagged by quite a few of o you over the last few weeks, including at least @telomeke. Sorry this took a while, but I've been distracted.

1. Are you named after anyone?

Technically yes. I have my father's name as one of my middle names because my mom said we didn't make enough money for me to be a IV.

2. When was the last time you cried?

WATCHING GOBLIN TWO DAYS AGO OVER THAT DOG.

3. Do you have kids?

No, but I'm not opposed. It's just something I view as part of a partnership and I don't have one yet.

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

I played baseball as a kid, but everyone around me knows how to play basketball, football, and soccer.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Yes, but mostly to make highly-referential jokes for queer people.

6. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Generally their mood. I find myself reading body language to see what kind of interaction I'm about to have.

7. What’s your eye color?

Dark brown. I'm melanated.

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings. I am Black and gay. I get enough real moments where my fight or flight instincts get triggered without seeking that out for fun.

9. Any talents?

Maybe? I seem to remember the years that films came out pretty quickly. I generally have a pretty good memory, am a solid communicator, and feel like I'm pretty quick at problem solving. I am also a very good warthog driver in Halo.

10. Where were you born?

This is a security question, but I'm from the US Gulf Coast.

11. What are your hobbies

I love D&D, and have moved to Pathfinder 2e recently. I'm still having a ton of fun with the hobby. I like building stories with my friends and having those stories evolve out of the drama of adventuring. I'm also a queer cinephile and avid BL fan. Other than that, I'm a fan of cities. I spend a lot of time thinking about urban flood adaptation.

12. Do you have any pets?

My roommate has a cat. His name is Bahamut. He can be rather loud.

13. How tall are you?

I'm a short king! I'm 5'5"

14. Favorite subject in school?

Math and history. I like problems with mostly clear solutions and I like knowing where we came from. I'm kind of obsessed with the Bronze Age Collapse.

15. Dream job?

I don't dream of work, but I would like to devote my energy into sustainable urbanism. It'd be nice if I could make a living doing that and also enjoy my hobbies.

I think most folks have done this by now, but tag back if you do it after seeing mine!

#tag game

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delightfulcollectivetyphoon · 1 month

Text

heres the knifeplay as promised.

warnings: knifeplay, overstimulation, blood kink, praise, bondage, oral (f receiving), vibrator, cockwarming, hair pulling, p in v, mirror sex, edging, spanking, addiction reference, mention of a threesome (possibly foursome), mention of a breeding kink, squirting, aftercare, softdom!james, use of (Y/N) ONCE, angst, lactation kink, bondage, my insanely shitty writing

a/n- ummm yeah i might have projected my abandonment issues a lil bit jk a lot so yeah theres that and also UUUUGGGHHHH hes not a want hes a need. i NEED him to **** and ******* ******* ***** ********* **** * ***** *** *** ** *** ********* *** **

also im sorry ;-; i did minimal research on how it feels to lactate so um yeah sorry if its inaccurate anyways first time ive ever written a lactation kink and i fucking hate it :D lmao my writing not the kink. uuuh yeah finished this at 11 pm so sorry if its fucked up if you notice any errors at all, please contact me :)

His right hand tugged your hair, and his left hand held your wrists behind your back as he took you from behind. Tears had started to pool on the blanket below you; he had been edging you for about an hour now as he used you to chase his own release. The red easel mirror in front of you bore your helpless image under a man so heavenly you felt like praying every time looked your way. He stared into the reflection of your eyes as he chased his own release, slack-jawed and sweaty. When he finally reached his peak of ecstasy, he stopped thrusting and ground himself on your ass, length throbbing as he released inside of you. His balls drew up against your labia. You whined as the hot fluid spilled out of your abused cunt, dripping down and sliding over your clit. He groaned as you clenched around him, tearing every last drop of release from him.

"Please Jamie," you sobbed. "I need to cum so bad I'll do anything!"

The hand holding your hair let go and landed roughly on your ass. He gasped through his teeth at how you tightened at the impact. He brought his hand down again, and again. He watched the skin ripple with a great amusement. He could see the marks he made on your ass, proud that you were taking it so well. While massaging the pained flesh, he pressed his front to your back, and spoke,

"Anything?"

"Anything, please Jamie please!"

He pulled out and flipped you over. You looked so beautiful, your ruddy cheeks, your puffy eyes and lips, and the tiniest string of drool hanging from the corner of your lips. You looked at him in fear of his definition of 'anything'. He leered at you, then dropped to his knees and forearms, shoving a finger in your sore hole, and immediately took to sucking on your puffy clit. You screamed at the sudden overstimulation; your head fuzzy as your clit throbbed on his tongue. He lifted his head from your folds but kept a steady pace with his hand.

"You need to cum 3 times, okay? If you don't, you don't get to cum for a week. You don't get anything but my hand and my mouth, is that understood?"

"Yes," you slurred.

He dove back down and continued lapping at your nub. He had so far denied you 5 orgasms, and each one caught up to you in less than 2 minutes. You screamed as you gripped his hair so hard you were afraid of pulling it out. Your thighs closed around his head, suffocating him as he fingered you through your high. You saw stars as the orgasm worked its way up to its peak. You clenched so hard he could barely bend his fingers. The sound of your moans and the lack of air nearly made him cum again. He ground down into the mattress, moaning into your cunt as his cum stained the sheet. He continued to eat you out in a frenzied manner.

"It's too much," you cried "Jamie stop it's too much!"

He inserted a third finger as he lifted his head. He simply grinned at you, at your oblivious-to-what-was-coming expression. He pulled his fingers out, a mix of cum and spit connecting his hand to your hole. You breathed a sigh of relief as he sat on his heels, observing his work. Cum leaked from your cunt, your hole red and puffy. As you caught your breath, he moved so that he was holding you in his arms, his back leaning against the headboard, and his hands encasing you in a suffocating hug. He peppered kisses along your scalp, grinning as he caught your expression in the mirror.

"You ready?"

You stared back at him through the glass.

"For what?"

"You still owe me 2 more. And I don't think my baby could go a full week without cumming. I don't think she could last 7 whole days without my cock or mouth or fingers. Hell, you would beg me just to let you wear one 'uh my shirts."

You whimpered as he lifted your thighs so your calves crossed his. Your cunt was now directly facing the mirror, angry and sore. You whimpered as you realized you had to do this. He was right; you couldn't last a whole week without him. Hell, you couldn't even last 3 days. He was like a drug, once you start, you just can't quit. His hand snaked down your waist and onto your inner thigh. He rubbed the sensitive skin as he whispered praises into your ear.

"You're being such a good girl for me baby.'

"Love this tight little cunt so much."

"Let me take care of my pretty little girl."

"Let me make her feel good."

As soon as he muttered the last sentence, he began to very softly skate over your clit with his middle finger. You inhaled sharply as his free hand began to massage your breast. He toyed with the nipple, twisting it every which way. Since he couldn't suck on it, he put his finger in your mouth, making you coat it with your spit. You sucked on his finger slightly longer and harder than needed, just to spite him. He raised his eyebrow and began twisting your hypersensitive nipple again. You moaned as you grabbed his thigh with one hand and his forearm with the other. You felt another orgasm approaching. James egged you on, smiling as you tried so hard to accelerate your release. You ground against his hand, chasing ecstasy. It came with one hard twist of your nipple. You saw white, dotted with black. As he watched your release gush into his hand, he praised you through the aftershocks.

"That's my girl."

"Knew she could do it."

You sat there, gasping for breath. A thin layer of sweat coated your body, making your bodies skid against each other, which James used to his advantage. He had begun to leak precum down your back, and your squirming had only aroused him more. "Readjusting", or so he said, he thrusted once against your back. He hissed as he got his desired friction.

"You need help with that?" you teased, despite your exhausted state.

"Oh no, you're not getting out of this. Since everything has to be all about you." He was still pissed off because you had been flirting with other men, and one or two women right in front of him. He knew it was just to get him riled up, but he couldn't help it. Your punishment: edging. Each ruined orgasm accounted for one person you had flirted with. And he was great at keeping track.

You whined as he began his torture again. Only this time, he was whispering his filthiest fantasies in your ear.

"Wanna tie you up and make you wear a blindfold while I ruin this pretty little cunt."

"You would like it if I shared you, especially with one of the guys from the band. Don't lie."

"Gonna see how many times straight I can make you cum from my fingers."

"I should put a fucking baby in your womb. Watch as it grows, as your breasts grow. Milk you with my mouth every day. Knowin' I did that."

"Watch you fool around with one of the guys. But while he's fucking you senseless, remember who you belong to."

You gasped at the last one, which earned you a slap on the thigh. The skin grew bright red, and it stung like hell. Your third orgasm hit you the hardest. Your eyes clouded over as your hips lifted off the bed, and you shot your fluid across the bedspread.

"Fuck! James...James...Uh fuck...baby...fuck!"

His free hand pressed on your lower stomach to keep you still.

"Shhh baby I know, I know. Fuck, look at that beautiful little mess you've made. So fuckin' perfect."

He held you tightly around the waist as you writhed. As you thrashed, you gave him the friction he wanted.

"Scoot forward a little bit."

You crawled out of the confines of his legs and watched as he jerked himself off. You felt like passing out, but you wanted to show your appreciation. You crawled forward to where your hand was in reach of his cock. You took his hand away from his length and set it on his thigh. You rested your head on the hand, prompting him to slowly caress your hair. You started out slow, twisting your hand around the base and rubbing your thumb over the head, making absolute sure you maintained eye contact with him. He came in hot spurts, and you watched as the translucent liquid rolled over your fingers. You brought your hand up to your mouth and sucked his cum off, hollowing out your cheeks. He brought both hands to the sides of your head to pull you in for a kiss; he loved tasting himself on your tongue. You straddled his thighs, gasping when you felt his spent cock rub against your clit. The kiss continued until neither of you could breathe; whether you had forgotten how or you were too busy enjoying the other, you didn't know. After what only felt like a few minutes, you separated. You didn't have it in you to walk, so James went to go get a towel. You could hear water running in the bathroom, and when he came back, he carefully cleaned your combined mess. He helped you get dressed and led you to the living room, where he sat you on the couch and ordered takeout, all while gently massaging your bruises and sneaking glances at your exhausted demeanor. The night continued on with a movie and some of the best Chinese you've ever had. It ended with pushing yourself further into him under the covers, so he could hold you closer.

When you woke up, you found yourself feeling sore, but ultimately refreshed. You could walk without wincing, which you thought was an absolute win. You made yourself a cup of coffee but waited until James got up to see if he wanted to go out for breakfast. As you put your mug in the dishwasher, you could hear the bedroom door creak open, and his heavy footsteps come down the hallway.

"Wakey, wakey sunshine. I was thinking about going somewhere for breakfast. Where should we go?"

"Give me like... 5 minutes and I'll get back to you," he grumbled while digging his palms into his eyes. You turned around to him sitting hunched over in a chair, hands still over his eyes, resting his elbows on his knees. You pulled up a chair next to him and set your hand on his back.

"Everything okay?"

He lifted his head and swung his arms down between his legs as he looked at you.

"Yeah, just didn't get much sleep."

"Why? What's going on?"

"Oh, nothin'. Just couldn't stop thinkin'."

"Do you mind me asking you what?"

"I'll tell ya later," he said, grinning. He stood up and walked over to the coffee maker.

"There's some still in the pot."

He hummed in acknowledgement as he pulled a mug from the cabinet. You watched him pour a cup and walk back over to you. He sat down and held the mug between his hands, enjoying the warmth.

"Did I do something?" you blurted.

"What? No, nothing." He set his coffee on the table and took hold of your chair, turning you towards him.

"You," he said, pointing his finger at you, "did nothing wrong, okay? I know you like to overthink things, but really, it's nothin' bad. And, I guess this defeats the purpose, but I have a surprise for you."

He spoke with a stern voice but lightened up significantly with his last sentence. You opened your mouth to speak, but he knew what you were going to ask.

"Do not ask me what the surprise is," he said teasingly. You laughed and stood, sitting back down on his lap, both legs on one side, facing him. You put your hands on his shoulders and pecked him on the lips.

"Not workin'."

"What?" you asked innocently, batting your eyelashes.

He set a hand on your thigh and rubbed the skin.

"You think you can bribe it out of me with a kiss, but it's not happenin' darlin'."

"What if I did more than a kiss?"

"Well shit. Guess I am a pushover."

You giggled as you stood, his hand flopping back down on his own thigh. You had turned to walk to the bedroom but were stopped by his hand on your forearm.

"What do you want?"

"In what category?"

He raised an eyebrow, his grip suddenly tightening on your arm.

"Hello, Earth to (Y/N). Breakfast, ya weirdo."

"Mhm, yeah, breakfast. I don't care, you pick."

He released you as you began your walk again, letting his fingers graze against your passing arm. A chill shot down your spine, engrossing your body in goosebumps. You tried to hide it as you rounded the corner. He watched you go, eyes everywhere but your head. Really has no idea what's coming, he thought.

A few days had passed before James would even travel below your navel again. You didn't know why he wasn't touching you nearly as often as he used to. Is the surprise a cold shoulder? One night, after James had finished with the dishes, and you had dusted throughout the house, he finally spoke up.

"Come sit with me for a second."

"Is this about why you've been ignoring me?"

"Well, yes. You really wanna know what I was thinking about a few nights ago?"

You fiddled with your hands in your lap.

"Of course! We haven't fucked for the majority of the week! Obviously, somethings up."

"Well, do you remember when you came back from the concert with me? And we were sitting on the porch?"

"Yeah?"

"When you sat down, you noticed my knife. You begged for me to use it on you."

"Oh." You thought that you had crossed a line. Maybe he had something in his past with knives, and you had overstepped.

"I just wanted to make sure you want it."

You looked up in surprise, finding him fiddling with his rings.

"Y'know, those scars don't go away easy."

"I thought you were dumping me... for having a knife kink."

He leaned forward, and grinned slightly.

"No, no. I am not dumping you. Never will, in fact. I mean it when it when I say you're mine. Forever."

You felt tears at the corners of your eyes as you processed his words.

"You...mean it?"

"Oh, of course I do. Which is why I've never used my knife on you. I wanted to make sure that you wanted me to cut you. Like I said before, scars are scars. They won't go away for a long time, and I just wanted to make sure that you would like them."

He finally wanted to use his knife on you. And the fact that he planned on being with you, not just as a casual thing, but being with you. You looped your arms around his neck as you let his speech soak in. No one had given themselves to you like this, and it felt euphoric that you finally had someone with as deep a connection to you as you did to them. He rubbed your back, holding your head on his shoulder. You could feel his hand nearly encasing your entire scalp, which did nothing but arouse you. You unraveled yourself from him but found your hair to be locked in a tight grip. He yanked your hair down, so that your neck was now exposed entirely to him. He ran his teeth over your throat, licking where it started to curve towards your chin. You gasped and gripped onto his shoulders as the hand that was massaging your back had snuck around to your front and began kneading your breast. You involuntarily ground down onto his lap, trying to get some relief. The hand holding your hair came down on your ass. You gasped, letting out a moan. He ran his teeth over your throat again, but this time deeper. He never broke skin, but he made sure to let you know that he could. He went back to toying with your breast, pinching and rolling the nipple through your shirt. Your clit felt like it was about to explode; it pounded harder than it ever had. You could hear your heartbeat in your ears as he leaned down to suck at your nipple. He had told you a while ago that he was exploring a potential lactation kink, which had turned you on to no end. You had always had smaller breasts, but you knew that regular feeding could enlarge them, which had made you that much hotter to yourself.

"James..." you moaned, "I don't think I can."

He let go of your nipple with a soft pop.

"What do you mean?"

"I've read that it can take hours for someone who hasn't given birth to actually produce anything."

"Well, do you have plans? 'Cause I sure as hell don't. Just this."

He returned to your puffy nipple, determined to get even the tiniest bit out of you. Hey, progress is progress.

Your hands roamed through his silvery hair, digging into his scalp whenever he would graze his teeth over the soft skin. You felt his rough hand slide over your breastbone; he was kneading the flesh. After what felt like only a few minutes, you felt a new, strange sensation. You went numb for a few seconds, but your nipple started to mildly tingle. You looked down to see the tiniest bit of white at the corner of his mouth. You nearly moaned at the sight of him. You messed with his hair as he continued. After a few minutes, he pulled away, continuing to rub your nipple with his thumb, soaking it in milk.

"Baby..." he breathed.

He leaned to kiss you, and you whimpered at the taste of yourself on his tongue. He pulled away, trailing back down to your breast. He sucked a hickey just to the right of your areola before continuing to milk you. You could hear him swallow every few seconds. It was only after your nipple was nearly sore that you noticed his hard-on. You didn't know how you had managed to ignore it for all this time; you were sitting right on top of him.

"Please...can I touch you?"

After a few seconds, he broke away and licked the overflow from his lips.

"As long as you be nice."

You reached your hand down, trailing your fingers along his tummy before resting your hand on his bulge. He moaned as you traced him through the denim, the vibrations sending chills down your spine. He pulled away so you could get off him, giving you easier access. He gasped through bared teeth as you unbuttoned his pants, relieving the pressure. You licked a narrow stripe from the base to the tip, licking up the precum that had gathered there. You licked the head once more before taking him in your mouth, not daring to bottom out on the first try. You worked your way down, pulling off and going deeper each time. He moaned as you brought a hand up to massage his sac. You snuck your fingers down just a half-inch lower, stroking his perineum.

"Fuck!" he yelled, pulling your hair.

"What the hell did I tell you?"

"To be nice," you said with a grin.

"Getting so close to my ass isn't exactly nice, is it?"

"I wouldn't be complaining."

"Yeah, we'll see how long you hold up."

He shoved his cock back into your mouth, groaning as you choked around him, your throat constricting.

"I'm gonna cum... Fuck! You want my cum in your pretty little mouth?"

You nodded as best you could, before picking up your pace, eager to have him fill you. He came as you bottomed out against him, swallowing as your nose touched his pelvis.

"Shit! Pretty mouths all filled up. Fuck, take it!"

He thrusted, earning him a loud gag from you as you choked on his cum. You swallowed again and again, draining him. He didn't stop until he could see his release dripping from the corners of your lips.

"Open."

You revealed your mouthful of cum to him, sticking out your tongue, letting some drip off the tip.

"Swallow."

It took a minute, but you managed to swallow all of it, licking your lips to get every last ounce. You opened your mouth again, showing him.

"That's my good girl."

You slumped against him, still lightheaded from his facefucking.

"Go get on the bed."

You walked excitedly back to his room. You had no idea what lie ahead, but you would embrace it with open arms. You laid down on the bed, feeling your shirt absorb what was leaking from your nipple. James came in after a few minutes, and you noticed the gleaming knife in his left hand. He crawled on the bed. He was on his hand and knees above you, tracing your hips with the point. You squealed as you felt the cold metal move along your waist.

"Now, you're going to do what I say, when I say it. Got it baby?"

"Mhm" you whined.

"Good girl."

You gasped as he sliced your shirt down the middle. The limp fabric was pulled back by his free hand, revealing your glistening breasts. Drops of white floated down your areola and onto your breastbone. He then sliced the arm of the shirt and stuffed it into your mouth.

"All mine, aren't you?"

You nodded, terrified. He was looking at you with a manic glare. You were terrified, and you loved it. He tossed the knife to the slide before sliding your leggings down your legs, tossing the pants to a corner. He picked up the knife again, trailing from your kneecap to the side of your panties. He flipped the knife around on your skin, cleanly slicing the lace. He took them in his hand, bringing them up to his nose before licking them right where your wetness had accumulated. He then gathered your wrists and tied the fabric around them.

"I know you like to get handsy, but if you're good, maybe I'll take these off early."

He tied a small bow before pushing you back against the headboard, so you were sitting up. He stood, walking over to the mirror directly in front of the bed. He smiled, then walked over to you, pulling your gag out.

"Such a pretty girl, huh? Who's girl are you?"

He took your jaw in his hand, forcing you to look at your reflection.

"I'm yours. All yours."

He smiled and leaned back, and you took the opportunity to look at yourself again. A hand came towards your cheek; first numbness, then pain. You tried to lean back before it could land, but you forgot that you were against a headboard. You could feel your cheek throb. You brought your hands up to it to try and soothe the pain, but your hands were met with his own. He grabbed your wrists and set them on your lap, before kissing the impact point. As he pulled away, you felt the very tip of his tongue stroke the already-visible bruise. He put your gag back in, tracing your bottom lip as he spoke.

"And don't you forget it."

You watched him walk to the front of the bed and strip. First his shoes, then his shirt, his pants, his socks, and finally his underwear. He was fully hard again, painfully hard. He gasped as the cold air hit his length. His cock was a combination of purple and red, and his balls looked excruciatingly tight. The tip was engorged, his slit leaking precum on the carpet. He crawled back on the bed, so that he was eye level with you. He kissed your cheek, his eyes almost apologetic. He slid himself back so that he was eye level with your heat. You were dripping onto the bedsheets, and your hole was clenching around nothing. He traced your labia with his pointer finger, teasing you. You moaned around the gag, tilting your hips forward. He smirked before slipping his finger into your hole. You whined as you fluttered around him.

"Who are you all wet for?"

"You!" you mumbled around the fabric. He inserted his middle and pointer in one sharp thrust, making you roll your eyes back. Every time he would pull them out, he would rub against the top of your hole, making you see stars. He darted his tongue out to wet his lips before latching onto your clit. You nearly screamed as he swiped his tongue over your clit while sucking on it. You came in no time flat. You convulsed on the bed as you released, screaming around the gag. He pulled himself over you, staring into your eyes as you recovered.

"All fucked out and I haven't even put my cock in you."

You watched him with misty eyes. He brought his hand down to his throbbing length and gave himself a few small pumps. He let out a groan and set his cock along your folds. He thrusted a few times, stimulating your oversensitive clit.

"You're gonna fuckn' kill me, y'know that?"

You giggled at his remark. He smirked at you before pulling back, and carefully inserting the head. The girth was almost too much. You could practically feel every vein running along the underside. He throbbed inside of you. You clenched at the feeling, earning you a gasp from him. He wore a look of rage before slapping the side of your breast, watching the skin ripple as you writhed beneath him. He picked up the blade and ran it down your chest, stopping at your navel. The knife left goosebumps in its wake. He lifted it and traced your left areola before trailing it to your throat, pressing.

"You have no idea how badly I've wanted to do this. Ever since we spoke for the first time, I knew I would fuck the light outta you while holding a knife to your gorgeous skin. Marking you as mine, with my cum and my blade. All mine."

He bottomed out on the first thrust, hitting your g-spot. You groaned at the contrast of the cool knife and his hot cock. You had acquired a thin sheen of sweat, both from premature exhaustion and fear. He began to ram into you, not caring if it hurt. You arched your back, pushing your chest closer to James'. He caught the stray drops of milk falling down your breast and quickened his pace. He had an iron grip on your waist, surely leaving a bruise. He hit your spot every single time, making sure to grind against your clit when he bottomed out. It felt like only a few minutes before you came again. He groaned as he neared his own sweet release, spurred on by your constricting hole and wanton moans. You stared at him through hooded eyes, almost communicating telepathically. He used his knife hand to pull your shirt arm out, soggy and damp with your spit.

"Unh...uh fuck! Jamie, Jamie please! Fuck I'm gonna...I'm gonna..."

You stopped midsentence as your eyes rolled back in your head. You convulsed wildly before squirting, soaking his abdomen and thighs. He came just by the sight alone. You weren't even coherent, just blubbering about how he felt so good. You clenched impossibly tighter around him, milking his balls of every last drop. You felt his cum fill your pained hole, felt him bottom out for the last time, grinding against your pelvis, making sure that he had made you give everything. You nearly blacked out. It took your entire being to stay conscious.

He took the knife from your throat before untying your hands. He whispered praises as he rubbed your sore wrists. He carefully pulled out, peppering kisses along your neck.

"I need you to do one more thing for me, sweet girl."

You were positioned at the edge of the bed, facing the mirror, with your back to his chest. You were sitting on his lap, his cock stretching your ass. When watching him stroke himself with lube, you ahd inquired as to why.

"You said you wouldn't complain. Breaking promises, now are we?"

You had refused, letting him penetrate your ass.

You held a vibrator to your clit, sobbing as the overstimulation consumed you. His arm was wrapped around the underside of your thighs, holding your thighs to your chest, your pussy on display. You could barely look in the mirror, your head not capable of rising that far. He was ghosting the blade along the underside of your thighs, deciding which one to cut. He eventually settled on your right one. Before he got to work, he held your head up with his left hand; he knew you couldn't do it on your own. You watched as he dug the blade into your skin. You moaned as you saw the blood drip thickly down your thigh. His eyes were fiery, his demeanor focused. You nearly screamed as he finished the curve on the J. He gave you some time to adjust before moving on to the H. He made slow, deep cuts, sure to leave scars. You had cum twice more with the vibrator, your cum and blood mixing on the towel beneath you. He ran his finger under the J, collecting as much blood as he could. He brought it up to his mouth and nearly came when he tasted you. Metallic and dark. Red and bitter. His favorite. He adjusted you so that you were farther back on the bed, giving him room to lay down. He lapped at your wounds, digging his tongue in slightly. He moaned as he cleaned you, awaiting the future, able to fuck you, able to spank you on his mark, able to remind you just who your holes belong to, who you belong to.

After he had applied a square bandage to your thigh, you sat with him in between his legs. His head rested on your shoulder as your arms crossed in front of you, holding his hands. UFO blared in the background, although neither of you cared much. You only cared about being with each other. That was all that mattered.

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WOW OKAY. *sobs, screams, dies* HOkay who let me have writing ability? I just wanna talk, I just wanna talk.

If you liked this, please comment and reblog! Comments mean more to me than you'll ever know, and so does sharing this with ur friends (online or real life). byeeee <3333

#metallica #james hetfield #papa het #james hetfield smut #james hetfield x reader #knifeplay #knife kink #blood kink #where tf do i sign up bro #over here shaking quaking screaming cumming sobbing throwing up #coming back to life #then dying again #lactating kink

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m0rbidmacabre · 2 months

Text

If you have Ghosts

Chapter 2

Summary: Swiss continues to struggle with emotional issues and is ordered to take time off by Papa IV. Dew is upset by Swiss's outburst and the two have a tense relationship. After a day of rest, Swiss proposes a game of chase in the woods, which escalates into a sexual encounter between the two. The story explores themes of power dynamics, emotional struggles, and interpersonal relationships within the group.

Warnings: blowjob, swiss & dew, ghoul on ghoul, angst, hate, sadness, feral ghoul warning, tour life, ghoul on ghoul, MFM, rough sex, anal, masturbation, depression, angst, fuck DEW, you hottie.

Notes: please ask in comments if you would like to be tagged in future posts

If You Have Ghosts

Chapter two

Previous chapter

Link to AO3

Returning to the ministry wasn’t as easy as Swiss as had initially thought, he was hoping that returning to normal life would help him, that his loss of control was somehow linked to being on tour but that wasn’t the case. He had spent his first week home sat in his room, hardly leaving his bed. He was trying so hard to rest and recover, but his body was refusing to let him. His pack had all gone back to normal ministry duties of guarding and taking care of papa, but out of concern, papa iv had asked Swiss to take some time off. Swiss found himself in Papa’s office the morning after they had all arrived home. Papa was quick to get Swiss into his office to see him. Knowing what papa wanted Swiss walked into the room shouting “Papa, I don’t want to take time off… you need me on duty.”

“We should be fine, eh; mountain and dew have agreed to do some double shifts... please don’t worry”. Papa explained, waving his arms around as he explained to the ghoul.

“But they need to rest too, I don’t want to be a burden, I need to work”. Swiss cried at papa, hoping that his displeasure would change his mind, but it didn’t.

“Please just take a week, take two. Just rest, relax... your health comes first. I will not have my ghouls struggling. we need you at full strength for when we find out what this issue is…”

“Papa, I’m fine…”

“No, Swiss… Listen to your Papa. it’s an order. In the meantime, I will do some research”.

Swiss sighed and turned around, walking straight for the door, his angst showing as he slammed the door behind him. Dew, who was on guard at Papa’s, shouted after Swiss as he stormed away.

“Hey, calm the fuck down…” he shouted.

Swiss turned around and flipped him off as he carried on walking. “Fuck you Dew, stay out of it” he shouted back at Dew who slumped against the wall with a large huff.

Swiss found himself back at the ghoul den before he knew it, walking straight for his room, storming past the other ghouls who were having a relaxing day off with pizza in front of the TV.

“Mountain, do you think I should go check on him?” Aether said as Swiss stormed into his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

“Leave him Aeth, it sounds like he needs to cool off”.

Aether got to his feet, anyway, ignoring Mountain and walked to Swiss’s door. He pressed his ear to it, hoping to hear if Swiss was okay but what he heard from the room was something that would haunt him. Aether could hear Swiss pining, crying, aching. Swiss was sobbing uncontrollably. It didn’t take more than a second for Aether to open Swiss’s door and close it behind him.

“Swiss, what’s going on? Are you okay?”

“Papa is making me... take time off” he sobbed, losing his breath halfway through...

Aether Immediately walked up to Swiss and enveloped him in his strong arms.

“Hey, it’s all going to be okay….” Aether muttered repeatedly while running his hands over Swiss’s dreadlocks, using his quintessence to help calm the heartbroken ghoul while pattering him with tiny kisses.

Papa IV had been feeling off since Swiss visited his office that morning, something didn’t feel right… maybe it was because his multi-ghoul wasn’t feeling his best, or maybe it’s because he was forced to make him take some time away from duties, knowing full well it would leave Swiss even more upset. The last thing Papa wanted was for the ghoul to feel like he wasn’t wanted or needed... Papa decided to take the rest of the afternoon off from working on ministry paperwork to go to the library and do some research into why Swiss might be acting so different to how he normally was.

Dew followed behind Papa as he walked to the library, they both walked in silence as they contemplated the morning. Dew had also been upset by Swiss’s outburst that morning, only Dew had more reason to be upset. Swiss had told him to stay out of it, but Dew only wanted to help the multi-ghoul feel better... To remind him that this wasn’t the place for him to take out his anger. He cared a lot for Swiss, they were close… or at least, he thought they were. it just didn’t go down how Dew thought it might. The fire ghoul had been thinking about it since it had happened, his upset only adding to his silence as he internally argued with himself.

“Here we are Dew, just wait outside please…” Papa iv asked Dew as they reached the restricted section of the old library. As you would expect the room was filled wall to wall with old books that were covered in a thick layer of dust and cobwebs, nobody but ministry heads were allowed into the restricted section, the books that lived here were often deemed too dangerous for normal eyes. Anything you would need could be found here, want to summon a ghoul? How about Lucifer himself? It’s all here.

Papa pulled out an interesting looking book titled ‘Ghouls: A Historical Perspective’, it was leather bound, the pages older then both Dew and Papa. He skimmed the pages, flicking to illnesses...

Papa sat for hours, unable to find the answer. Day light was fading fast and so was the lighting in the room, the candles doing their best to keep the room aglow were starting to die. He was starting to give up hope. “Maybe this was just a depressive state, like humans go through, maybe it will pass. Si… si, maybe…” He thought to himself with a big sigh as he scratched his head in confusion, slamming the book closed... he had found nothing that could help his ghoul and he felt bad about it. Dew stood outside the library waiting as Papa opened the door with a concerned smile.

Dew just smiled back as they began to walk towards Papa's papal chambers, both still stricken with worry for the multi-ghoul. Dew left Papa at his chambers and started to head back towards the ghoul den, it had been a long day, and he was tired. All he wanted was to curl up in his bed and sleep, forget about what had happened, forget that the search for answers wasn’t a fruitful one.

He walked through the door, and mountain was still sat on the sofa watching movies in his boxers.

“Hey Dew. How was work?” he asked the fire ghoul as he walked through the door to the ghoul den.

“Fine I guess….” He sighed.

“Hey, you know Swiss came home all upset this morning…... Do you know what happened?”

Dew shook his head in response, knowing full well what happened.

“Aeth has been in there all day. I think he’s been crying… maybe you should see if Aeth wants you to take over?”

“Nah I’m sure they are good”.

Mountain pulled a face, shocked at dews response.

“Oh. Okay...” mountain shrugged, knowing it was most likely an argument between the two after Dews reaction and went back to watching the tv as Dew walked past the sofa to the kitchen, where he grabbed a sandwich and then walked to his room, shutting the door behind him. All he wanted was sleep, to simply let go of today and start a new one.

Swiss woke up feeling a little better, Aether had sat with him most of the day. He knew that the quintessence ghoul was a good friend and having his support right now was what he needed. He appreciated Aether, like he did the rest of his pack. He knew that every one of them had his back when he needed them, and he loved them all dearly. What he didn’t think about was the incident he had had with Dew, completely overlooking the fact that maybe one of his pack was hurting from his actions the day before.

He got himself dressed in some sweats and trainers and decided that he may as well go for a run to make use of his time away from work. Walking into the kitchen he spotted Dew, who he shot a big smile. “Well, someone’s in a good mood this morning. I’m glad one of us is feeling better” Dew said to Swiss in response to his toothy grin.

“I’m going for a run, Wanna play a game of chase?” Swiss said to Dew as he walked towards the door.

“What, now?”

“Yeah, I fancy letting my ghoul flag fly.” He said with a smile.

Dew just nodded. Clearly still feeling off with the ghoul he loved more then anything, but he was happy to see him in a better mood, even if his own feelings were still hurt from the exchange they had. It seemed that Swiss hadn’t even noticed he had hurt someone who loved him.

“I tell you what, I'll meet you out there... let's make it more fun... let’s make this a hunt... Whoever finds the other first? Deal?”. Dew said with a smug look on his face, knowing full well that he was an expert when it came to tracking. Sure, Swiss had muscle, but Dew had brains, he wasn’t the fastest, but he could outsmart almost anyone before they had even noticed. he was clearly planning something.

“Sounds like fun… lets do it. I’ll see you out in the woods.” Swiss gave dew a tilted smirk and closed the ghoul den door behind him, before picking up a running pace towards the woods. He knew it wouldn’t be long until dew was onto him, he wanted to get as far out as he could. Dew was nimble, and while Swiss was quick on his feet, his talents lay in his strength. He bobbed and weaved between the trees, and it wasn’t long until he could hear the whistle of footsteps whipping around him in a haze. He picked up his pace, trying to avoid being caught, he wanted to be the one doing the catching, he wanted to be the one winning, but he knew dew would give him a run for his money. It’s one of the reasons Swiss appreciated Dew so much. He always cut out the bullshit and got right to the point.

“You're going to have to be quicker than that….” Swiss heard Dew laughing behind him.

Swiss dodged and whipped between some trees, keeping his pace effortlessly fast. It wasn’t until Swiss thought he had a chance to stop and take a break, he couldn't hear dew, he couldn't smell him… maybe he had lost him. He leaned against a tree catching his breath when all of a sudden, he was rugby tackled to the floor and punched hard across the face splitting his lip. The hand that had just launched into his face now pushing his head into the ground. Swiss growled baring his teeth. Dew was laying on top of him pushing his face into the mud.

“Swiss, you fucking pushed me too far”

“What do you mean you lunatic?!”

“Yesterday”

“Urgh, Dew... Fucking get over it”

A hard blow struck Swiss to the side of the head. Leaving Swiss to take a swipe at Dew, the both of them rolling around in the mud.

“You will fucking take this Swiss... you will” Dew shouted at Swiss as he turned him on to his stomach, laying all his body weight into his back.

“You’re being such a brat…” Dew hissed in his ear. As he unbuttoned his own belt, his already hard cock springing free.

“I’m going to fuck you now, and you're going to take it... You're going to enjoy it, and you are going to feel what it felt like to be pushed around”. Dew bit at Swiss as he pulled down Swiss’s sweatpants.

Dew began to bite into his neck, grinding himself harder against swiss’s butt cheeks as Swiss let out a moan.

“Fuck Dew... Fuck...” Swiss moaned.

“You want me don’t you Swiss, you want me to show you that you can’t push me around…”

“Fuck, Dew... Yes.” Swiss whimpered back to Dew as his face rubbed into the ground.

“You're so needy... here, suck…” dew slid his fingers into Swisses mouth, Swiss putting all the saliva around them as his slid his tongue around his fingers.

“Good boy, good…” Dew said removing his fingers and spitting in his hand to add extra lube.

Dew slowly slid his hand down his back as he continued to nip and bite at his neck. Reaching swisses butt, he slowly entered him with his two fingers. Swiss bit his lip, stifling an unearthly moan of desire. “How does it feel Swiss? How does it feel to let yourself go? To let me take you?”

“fucking good, fucking hot dew.. I need you” he whimpered as Dew moved his fingers slowly inside him.

Dew removed his fingers causing swiss to moan from the loss, he quickly spat on his hands and pumped himself hard causing his spit and pre-cum to leave his cock dripping. He positioned himself on top of Swiss “Good boy, swiss.. Good boy.” Dew moaned as he pushed himself inside him. Both of them quivering in response to the other. Dew continued to bite into Swiss, leaving little love bites all over his neck. “Everyone is going to know swiss, everyone is going to see that I own you” he breathed heavily to Swiss’s ear as he upped the pace. He began drilling into him, quicker, faster. Swiss lay on the ground, moaning and grinding himself again the ground below him so that his dripping cock also got relief.

“Please, can I?” swiss moaned...

“Can you what?… use your words” Dew breathed into his ear.

“Please, please can I touch myself” he moaned as Dew fucked into him.

“Urgh... Umm... Yes.” Dew moaned as he helped Swiss to his knees. Swiss immediately wrapped his hands around his own dripping dick, pumping himself harder and harder to match the pace of Dew who continued to fuck into him.

Dew moaned, feeling the fires in his stomach growing. He hunched himself over Swiss, taking another hard bite to his neck.

“Dew... Dew… can I?”

Dews breaths becoming hard, and heavy as the orgasm rushes to rift through him.

“Yes, baby. Yes... You can...” dew moaned out and he bucked into Swiss one last time. His body tipped into climax, filling Swiss. Moments later Swiss moaned as his reached his own orgasm, dews still semi hard inside him. He cried as he pumped himself to cum, letting it drip through his fingers onto the ground below them both, pooling.

Swiss stayed on all fours for a moment, while dew lay on his back trying to catch his breath. Both of them taking a moment to come down from the intensity of it.

“Fuck...” Swiss moaned...

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