#even OMNI MAN got screen time

[evercornelias]

this is what it felt like watching every character grow and have their time to shine in the last episode of invincible except for my girl atom eve

#invincible #atom eve #samantha eve wilkins #eve wilkins #everybody’s happy except for eve i guess! #and debbie my beloved you deserve better #but at least she got well deserved screen time #WHERE IS EVE #mark grayson #even OMNI MAN got screen time #omni man

[evilwickedme]

Hi there I would like to say I’m interested in the deadpool homophobia rant

hi there! many thanks to you

so the "deadpool homophobia rant" is... a little complicated. I'll try to keep it short because God knows I talk about Wade too much as it is on this hellsite. the point, before we go into literally any detail, is that the writing surrounding deadpool's sexuality is deeply problematic, both in its representation and its consequences in-narrative to him as a person, but I'll try to just focus on the facts.

we all know that deadpool is omni/pan, right? wrong. well, not wrong. just not... quite as solidly canon as we'd like. this is the only reference the actual word gets in canon:

this is from the posehn & duggan 2012 run (my beloved), although don't ask me to hunt down the specific issue, please, that sounds like a nightmare. suffice it to say that it's from the letter section at the end of one of the issues and that it's the only time I can find the actual word referenced anywhere with regards to our boy. you may remember that it was confirmed at some point - yeah, in a since deleted tweet. despite being attracted to anything from aliens to death herself, wade is not allowed to go past plausible deniability when it comes to heterosexuality.

that doesn't mean that wade doesn't express attraction to men, because he does, and often.

(from deadpool team up #887)

(from an early issue of spider-man/deadpool. 2, I think. maybe 3)

(from the daniel way 2008 run, again, don't make me dig up an issue please, but it's the one where he teams up with spider-man to defeat hit-monkey)

(there's also a few panels floating around online where he expresses attraction to cable but I don't have those saved on my laptop. I remember seeing one where wade fantasizes about rubbing sun screen on cable's back? but again, do not have those saved.)

anyway, the point is, wade absolutely gets to express attraction to men, and constantly. but only at his own expense. only when the joke will land. only when he gets to immediately say "no homo". only because he's already quirky and weird and insane, so of course he's also attracted to men, he's not all there, after all.

I'll try not to let this cross over to a connected but wholly separate rant about the ableism in his writing, but it's all connected, at the end of the day.

and it would be one thing if deadpool wasn't a relationship guy. but, although he's absolutely terrible at it, deadpool makes stab after stab at monogamy - always with women. he's a sleezeball, really. constantly asking women out, super and non-super, whether they're in any way interested or not. posehn & duggan pull back from this a little, and instead have him get married to shiklah, in a special issue dedicated to "every time deadpool has gotten married" (or at least thought he did). they got a bunch of previous deadpool writers and artists to contribue to the issue. somehow every single marriage was to a woman, even if she was literally an alien. bc deadpool's attraction to a woman is a tragedy, but at least it's a story; wade's attraction to a man is a joke. his one "relationship" with a man is with madcap, who abuses him from inside his head. they call it "falling in love":

(from deadpool annual #1, from uh... 2013? 2014?)

... but madcap's nothing but horrifically abusive towards wade when they're "together" (as in fused together with madcap playing the role of "white box") and the first arc in the 2015 duggan run is madcap deliberately fucking up deadpool's life because he won't take him back. not exactly a positive canon relationship. shiklah treats wade better.

deadpool also likes to dress in a typical feminine or gay coded fashion, and it's constantly questioned or made fun of by the people around him:

(from the deadpool musical issue)

(I actually had to google this one, I don't know where it's from for sure but it's pre-2012 (cause... boxes) and I'm pretty sure it's from cable & deadpool. no idea beyond that what issue or anything)

we see a constant, then, of deadpool expressing attraction to men and his gnc presentation, and yet the narrative never respects him for it. it plays it for laughs, plays the plausible deniability card, and despite wade himself seemingly being comfortable with his sexuality it is never presented as a good thing or even a neutral thing. deadpool's sexuality shines through despite what seems to be the writers actively fighting against it. and it doesn't have to be this way. nobody made them write him as pan in the first place, although, yes, I'd be sad if he wasn't, and more importantly, nobody made anyone write his pansexuality like this. it's in the movies too, to a lesser extent. it's frustrating and exhausting and it's deeply homophobic.

I love wade. he deserves better.

#wade wilson #deadpool #dp #marvel #marvel comics #spiderman #cable #homophobia #homophobic writing #queer #pansexual #ask #anonymous

[spyslayerkaisen]

Happy New Year everyone!

It is now, as I'm posting this at midnight at this point, 2024 in my area. Sure, 2023 had plenty of shitty moments (which I am not gonna talk about here since I wanna keep things positive here), but this year is not all entirely doom and gloom, as there are plenty of positives that happened this year for me. Those include, from the top of my head:

* I got a brand new gaming laptop with an RTX 3050 GPU from NVIDIA, with my own money

* I saw The Super Mario Bros. Movie twice in my local theatre (I even saw a movie at my local theatres twice before back in 2019, being Endgame 4 years ago, meaning this is the second time I've done so)

* I got back into plush collecting. Sure my plush collection in the past few years was small, but it has been growing lately as I got more later down the stretch of the year.

* I've been trying out new foods my mum has cooked for the first time (one of which includes cheesy potato with bacon)

* I’ve gotten into anime series that I never watched before this year (such as Darling in the FRANXX, Idolish7, Ensemble Stars, and Bungo Stray Dogs, and I did rewatch season 1 of JJK and Spy x Family before season 2 of their shows came out (I finished Spy x Family season 2, but I still need to catch up with JJK a little later on) and rewatching Demon Slayer season 1 again managed to make me watch the Mugen Train arc (technically twice, first for the movie and second for the TV-adapted arc) and Entertainment District before the Swordsmith Village arc came out (I was gonna see it premiere at the movies, but I did not get to, but at least I saw the arc when it actually aired on Japanese TVs).

* I saw a Studio Ghibli movie on the big screen, for the first time (I have seen anime movies in my local theatre before though, but this my first Ghibli movie in my local theatre, and it was dubbed too, which I saw to hear Christian Bale, Robert Pattinson and Mark Hamill in a Ghibli film)

* I've gotten more posters throughout the year in addition to the posters I already own. This year, I got posters of Spy x Family, Yu-Gi-Oh! (Duel Monsters, of course), Fairy Tail, Jujutsu Kaisen, Zelda Tears of the Kingdom, Pulp Fiction, Spider-Man, Demon Slayer, Batman and even Bluey! (which Bluey is one of my favourite shows, so I could not resist) I need three more in 2024 then my walls in my room are complete

* I saw two Amazon Prime exclusive shows for the first time (Invincible and The Boys) and they both became two of my favourite shows upon seeing them. And hell, even 2023 was a great year to see them for the first time, as Omni-Man and Homelander are coming to Mortal Kombat 1 which made me a proud fan of both shows.

* I've gotten back into physical media collecting (well I stopped early on in the first half of the year when I got Zelda Tears of the Kingdom, and I thought I was not gonna buy anymore physical media after that, but fortunately, I saw on the internet that people I've known on social media still love collecting physical media as long as they are still releasing them (I'm glad my local JB is still selling them which is a good thing as people are still buying discs for movies in Australia as I saw, despite that Best Buy, on the other hand, is no longer selling them starting 2024), so because of that, I decided to get back into buying physical media again, which this year after I got TOTK back in May (which I pre ordered in January), I got Street Fighter 6 (which I still need to beat the story mode of that), Resident Evil 4 (still need to play more) for PS5, Mortal Kombat 1 (which I pre ordered, and hell, I even got on Steam recently so I can play it on either my laptop or the ROG Ally, which I’ll get to in a little bit, but at least I beat the Story mode of it), Super Mario Bros. Wonder (which I still need to beat), and Spider-Man 2 (which I also need to beat and get the Platinum trophy of it post-game) and I even started to buy physical media of movies/TV shows/anime series (I didn’t buy any shows this year though, maybe I will next year), which are Puss in Boots the Last Wish, The Wizard of Oz, The Super Mario Bros. Movie, Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse, My Dress-up Darling, Cinderella (the 1950 Disney Classic), Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (which I still own on DVD and I'll still keep the DVD, but might as well upgrade it to 4K) and recently, The Crow! (which I'll watch later on for its 30th anniversary and maybe again on Spooky month)

* I got the Platinum trophy for three more games (Spider-Man Remastered, Spider-Man Miles Morales, and Bluey the Video game, all for PS5) after Astro's Playroom), so hopefully in 2024 I hope to get more Platinum trophies for PlayStation games

* And lastly, to end the year off with a bang, I finally got the brand new ASUS ROG Ally, also with all the birthday and Christmas money I've saved! Since it is a Windows device and it functions as a gaming PC, I can use that as my new gaming PC (one of these days I will get a docking station for it so that way I can have my new Ally replace my gaming laptop (which I'll still keep for collection purposes) and use it as my new main gaming PC).

That being said, 2023 (despite all the bad things that happened then, including several that happened in my life) I thought was a mixed bag between shitty moments and good moments. It was a shitty year for the bad things that happened (which, like I said, I'm gonna keep things positive here), but the good things that happened to me in 2023 definitely unequivocally saved the year for me from being entirely bad (2020 was still the worst due to “we all know what happened then which I'm not gonna bother mentioned since I mostly focus on the positive oriented stuff, but hey at least it had a few good things that happened for me back then, such as when I got my PS5 pre-ordered and got very lucky when I got it purchased when it was still in shortage (when it first came out, anyway) in early December, and even pre-ordering my first PS5 title which is Spider-Man: Miles Morales before I got said console).

[nicoolios]

Romantic

Happy holidays @biotickaidan! Here’s your Holiday Harbinger present. My apologies for real life getting in the way and keeping me from posting this on time. You mentioned loving Mass Effect for the moments throughout the series that make it what it is, as well as the character storytelling and a love of both Kaidan and Ashley (which I wholeheartedly share!) I hope you enjoy! A big thank you as well to @masseffectholidaycheer for organizing this thing every year and pulling it off.

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/45047258

fanfiction.net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14198412/1/Romantic

Amelia Shepard was a lot of things, but she would never call herself a romantic. Romantics tended not to last long in the Alliance, and their numbers amongst N7s were even more dismal. It was hard to romanticize the worst-case scenarios, everything she was trained for, and being expected to choose who would die so more could live beat her down to the point where even finding little things to look forward to was getting harder. That's why turning to fraternization surprised her so. And when fraternization turned to an actual, genuine, using the l- word relationship? Why, that was about as romantic as she’d gotten in years.

She loved Kaidan and Ashley. The talks they shared in the middle of the night about Earth years ago, the way they immediately clicked as a ground squad, the hours spent exploring the Citadel together, even the aforementioned little things like making each other try shitty alien beer in Chora’s Den or taking notes on the most authentic Earth food spots in the Wards. They had a bond the rest of the crew didn’t understand. Commander Shepard didn’t treat them any differently from the crew when it came to missions, but Amelia definitely preferred their company and came to love life aboard the Normandy. Eventually that love spread to one man in particular, born of those late-night chats and impromptu food dates. Private walks on the Citadel. Huddled together in a bunk watching a vid on a small omni-tool screen. Amelia already up hours before her shift, figuring if she couldn’t sleep she might as well get some paperwork done, and finding herself with company. The soldier became the romantic.

Which was how Amelia found herself smooshed into Kaidan’s bunk on the lower level, fingers entwined in his shirt, enjoying the few moments alone before Ashley came looking for some pre-mission destressing. She had already almost gotten her head bitten off by Wrex trying to simply talk to him about the mission. He had to understand why krogan clones weren’t going to help cure the genophage, especially when created by an indoctrinated madman like Saren. He had to understand why going to Virmire was necessary, why destroying the factory was even more so. Emotions ran too hot, especially once Ashley got involved. To avoid anyone getting shot Amelia ordered him into confinement until they reached planet side. Aside from worrying about the general wellbeing of her ground squad, which was a full-time job by itself, all that was left was trying to relax so her friends wouldn’t yell at her for going into a mission already wired. She lived her life wired, finding it near impossible to relax, but saving herself the fight with her crew was worth it. Saving herself her friendships was worth it.

She laid with her head on his chest, one hand on his shoulder and the other playing with his shirt, legs splayed out, hair falling out of its messy ponytail to tickle his face. His arm was curled around her waist, his free hand playing with those fallen strands. Both were in rumpled fatigues ready to be swapped for armor. Both had circles under their eyes, Amelia’s forever more pronounced since she inherited leadership. Both were covered in bruises and healing wounds and scars. Both had no greater concerns than staying in that moment in time forever.

“You think everyone will be able to handle it?” Amelia asked. She caught herself from saying tomorrow, since she’d come to accept that by the same time tomorrow she might be dead.

Kaidan smiled into her hair. “You have a good crew, Amelia. They can handle it. And Wrex will come around. He respects you too much. So does Ash. She'll keep an eye on him. It'll be okay. You'll be okay.”

Amelia had more doubts to voice, more insecurities in her newfound leadership to sort through. Kaidan was the only person she trusted completely to say those thoughts without fear of them leaking to the entire Normandy crew. She had to share them now before the mission, before they could affect her ability to command a ground team. Just as she was about to open her mouth, still smooshed into Kaidan’s chest, the door to the bunk room swooshed open and a storm rolled in.

“What vid are we watching?” Ashley blew in, her personal vid collection on her omni tool already connecting to a tablet in her free hand.

Amelia and Kaidan tried to detach themselves from each other before Ashley noticed, resulting in the both of them ending up on the floor in a mess of limbs and military issue blanket. Their limbs were still partially entwined, Kaidan’s head propped up on the metal supports, Amelia’s wrapped up in her arms in an awkward angle under Kaidan’s shoulder.

Ashley froze mid-step. From the beginning she suspected there was something more going on with the two of them. She just didn’t think it would take Virmire to culminate things. Still. Good for them. “What’s going on here, Skipper?”

“Oh, um, nothing. Nothing's going on, Ash. Just, uh...”

Kaidan never bothered attempting to offer an explanation. He gave a valiant effort to detangle himself and perched on the edge of the bunk, lending Amelia a hand so she could pull herself to her feet.

“Riiiiiight.” Ashley put one arm around Amelia’s shoulders and pulled her towards the door. Amelia reached behind her for Kaidan’s arm. He took it, forming a chain. “I’m assuming neither of you put any thought into this, so I went ahead and picked one out. You two procure the snacks. I'll pull up the vid.”

They were alone again as Ashley detoured into the common area, most likely for the last time in days, leaving them near the kitchens. As Kaidan moved towards the drawers Amelia stuck to his side. Ashley would be a few minutes yet. After all, Amelia was a romantic now. She had to act the part. And by this point, she had to admit, it wasn’t an act anymore. Amelia loved her best friends, the first she’d ever truly had, and beyond that she had Kaidan. She had family.

#mass effect #mass effect holiday cheer #Holiday Harbinger #biotickaidan #my fanfic

[nazmazh]

So, I'm talking with my friends, who are relatively big into Fortnite.

And they're explaining to me what today's update did to the game (me and the one's husband who is likewise not a Fortnite person).

And like, even though I'm not a Fortnite guy, I'm listening to this, and looking at what stuff has been posted to the internet.

And like...

Holy fucking shit.

It sounds like they're aiming to gut the whole core appeal of the game.

We're all just sitting here losing our goddamn minds at everything that apparently got pushed through in the new update.

I can't believe the speed at which Epic is looking to completely shoot themselves in the foot here.

It's like they sat atop their throne, and saw Blizzard/Microsoft, EA, CDPR, Unity, etc., etc. make massive blunders that utterly alienated large chunks of their otherwise passionate fanbases.

And decided that they could do that too! "We should emulate the unpopular moves those guys are making!"

Guns/weapons in the art/assets of your 3rd-person shooter-game where people expressly are being told to kill each other in-game?

Nope. Can't have that.

Not even in personal loading screen images that literally only the user will see.

No, there's no option for "I am 18+, I'm fine if I see this imagery. Here, I can prove this."

No guns in a shooter game. Not even empty holsters.

Borderlands Psycho-Man? Nah that skin's fine.

Michael "I'm from the slasher-movie codifier" Myers? Totally fine.

Funny jellyfish man that has a bandoleer? "FUCKING RESTRICT THAT SHIT IMMEDIATELY!"

Anyway, here's our new licensed character: "Omni-Man, from the famously all-ages property, Invincible!"

They're even locking skins that came out as part of bonus content that was sent out with today's release.

They couldn't even be bothered to fix their own "controversial" art assets before releasing it.

Because that'd be the more reasonable fix, if say, you're committed to this whole "violence bad" thing in your assets. Edit all the models and skins to remove those things, not restrict the content from the users who have sunk time and money into being able to use it.

But no.

They did not do that.

As my friend pointed out - The cornerstone of their legal defense against children playing this game has been "We are aware that there are many children playing our game. However, the game is rated T. You have to have an account to play - You must be of a certain age in order to make an account. Or have a parent give explicit consent to allow you to play despite being under that age. If the child lied about their age, the account must be terminated anyway, because it's invalid. If you gave consent for your child to play without really paying attention to the content, that's on you. At any rate, we have performed our responsibility with regards to child safety."

But... If they're expressly making this game more appealing to children, while still having the rating of T, then... Aren't they themselves actively encouraging children to play their game that is not rated for children? Which kinda invalidates them saying that children should not be playing this game?

And, and! Burying the main mode (well, two mode - Standard Game and Standard Game/No Build) in a sea of uncurated fan/player-made creative mode mods?

Like, it's like they're trying to frame those modes as just another possible experience, instead of like, the core reason people play the game.

Apparently the person in-charge (they got rid a previous creative/content director, if I'm understanding properly) has said something to the effect of "The MetaVerse-type experiences are why people play this game".

Not "They're a big part of the appeal, so we want to see how we can make that better/easier to access."

Just, essentially "This is the only thing we really care about now."

Like, I'm usually pretty skeptical of fanboy-type rage. But, like, nah, I'm all-in with them on this one.

It helps that my design-sensibilities-type-rage is almost never reigned it. This is pure stupidity on many, many levels.

It will be interesting to see how this plays out going forward. Will they realize just how badly they fucked up and revert things? Or will they double-down and lose their entire audience that actually pays for things themselves, and hope that little Timmy raiding mommy and daddy's credit card will be enough to sustain them going forward?

#fortnite controversy #I don't go here #but like holy fucking shit

[pastelroyce]

Before I Go, Let Me Say This

My part of the N7 Exchange event for queenofthejungle on Ao3. They had a lot of top tier ship suggestions but I was in the mood for mshenko (rather, when am I not in the mood?) with suggestions of angst and two dudes in love. This was my take on that!

Title: Before I Go, Let Me Say This

Summary: Shepard is on his way to the Omega-4 relay, but finds himself thinking about Kaidan and Horizon.

Words: 1,397

Rated: T (language)

Relationship: Male Shepard/Kaidan Alenko

Additional tags: light angst, angst with feels

Also available on Ao3

.

Commander Shepard was approximately 5 hours away from what could possibly be the last mission of his (second) life, yet in that moment replying to a damn letter was proving to be a more monumental task. The blinking cursor on his open message terminal mocked him from his position on the bed. Another screen behind it blocked out the rooftop view port of the Normandy, the letter Kaidan sent after their encounter on Horizon.

When he read the header for the first time his heart seized, petrified into a heavy weight, plummeted into the depths of his gut and lightened into a flutter all in the span of two seconds. It took one day to open the message and another three days to read it in full. Shepard read the letter over, and over, and over again until he could read it in his sleep–which he had in a dream a few nights ago.

Horizon was a mess. Horizon was an absolute cluster fuck of a premeditated mess that Shepard didn't think he'd ever forgive The Illusive Man for putting Kaidan and the colonists through. Horizon was what fully cemented the idea that Shepard was dead for two fucking years and all of its subsequent consequences, all of the possible ways it resonated with everyone he knew.

Of course Kaidan would be the first to apologize.

As Shepard read the message–at that point it became less reading and more scanning for important points–he could still hear Kaidan in the back of his head.

"You turned your back on everything we believed in! You betrayed the Alliance, you betrayed me!"

"I loved you. Thinking you were dead tore me apart. How could you put me through that?!"

"You've changed, but I know where my loyalties lie."

His words stung but after, once heads were cooler and Horizon was in another system, they weren't unreasonable.

Shepard had been the unreasonable one.

"I can see you won't listen to reason."

"The Alliance is going to blame Cerberus, just like you did."

"You saw what happened here!"

He definitely didn't feel like he walked away from that one on top.

Shepard wanted to write back, say he was also sorry and that he still loved Kaidan, maybe even more than before. The words never formed correctly, never deemed fitting for everything Shepard felt; the fifteen drafted letters saved in his terminal was proof enough.

Four and a half hours away from the Omega-4 relay.

With a resounding sigh, Shepard pushed himself off his bed and dragged his feet to the work desk. Maybe laying in bed was the problem; after all, his most productive report writing was done at that desk so logically he should be able to write the letter there no problem. What happened, instead, was that all Shepard could think about was Kaidan back on Horizon.

“Why didn’t you try to contact me? Why didn’t you let me know you were alive?!”

At the three hour mark that fucking cursor kept blinking on the still blank screen.

Fuck it.

If the mission did go FUBAR, if there really was a chance he wouldn't see the other side, he needed closure. Real closure and not a letter he'd forget about later. With a deep breath and a prayer he dialed up Kaidan's omni-tool.

"Commander Alenko speaking." That seemed too fast, too ready but Shepard could ruminate on that later. His heart leapt into his throat leaving his vision blurry and mind just a little gone. Kaidan repeated himself, his voice seemed too far away.

"Got your message," was what came out, low and hesitant. Shepard could have sworn he heard Kaidan gasp.

It was Kaidan's turn to go silent save for some rustling in the background and an automated door sliding. Shepard stood up in the meantime.

"John," came Kaidan's voice again, "it's…"

"Just," the longer they floundered, the less Shepard felt sure about what he was doing, "hear me out, okay? Two minutes."

A deep inhale came from Kaidan’s end but he quickly gave an okay. The floor was Shepard’s. For a split second he wished he had actually planned the call, rehearsed for maybe even a second because suddenly the words were just gone. Son of a bitch…

“John?”

"I," Shepard dragged a hand over his shaved head, "I'm…also sorry. About what happened."

"John-"

"I mean it.” When in doubt, spill your guts. “Sure I got angry, and for a while I felt like I was justified in that anger but shit Kaidan, how else do you cope with the fact you've been dead for two years?!"

"I was able to do it…"

Oh.

"Shit, shit, shit, I'm sorry. I didn't-"

"I know.” Kaidan’s voice was terse, like he was speaking through his teeth. Shepard could picture it perfectly in his head, the way Kaidan’s brow was probably pinched and how hard he must be trying to not frown. Their time on the SR-1 gave Shepard time to discover Kaidan’s tells.

“I need to backpedal. Uhh, another two minutes?”

“It’s been nearly ten minutes now.”

Has it?

Shepard checked the chronometer on his omni-tool. Sure enough the call was fast approaching the ten minute mark, and almost two and a half hours until they hit the Omega-4 relay. When did making a call get so difficult?

Well, shit.

“Anyway, Kaidan, I am sorry. I’m sorry for the way I acted on Horizon, but there’s something I want you to know,” he leaned against the fish tank, “if I had it my way, you would have been the first person I’d have gone after. Part of why it took a fucking invasion of a backwater colony to see you was partly due to being stonewalled in the beginning. Then circumstances came into play, and my current mission took priority, and…,” Shepard let his eyes follow the motions of a couple of jellyfish floating in the tank, “I just…had no idea how to approach you.”

Kaidan sighed. “Higher ups wanted me to investigate Cerberus, probably because our time hunting them gave me some credibility. You and I saw the limits their scientists were willing to go, but total resurrection?

When I first heard the rumors of you being alive, I refused to believe them, but…there was another part of me that hoped you would have tried to find me. God knows I did.” As Kaidan spoke his voice got lower so that by the end it was little more than a raspy whisper. “When I got approved for the mission on Horizon I knew Anderson would keep a tight lip about it.”

“Yeah. Wouldn’t even tell me.”

“Can you blame him? Could you imagine how mind boggling it is to see someone–someone who was dead for two years–back to life and working for known terrorists? The same terrorists you killed along with them?”

Just when Shepard felt he could breathe in, Kaidan spoke up again.

“Also, you didn’t know how to approach me? What is that supposed to mean?”

“Because, once again, I was dead for two years! What if you had moved on? What if you-”

“I could never.”

The certainty in Kaidan’s voice stopped Shepard dead in his tracks.

“I tried to but I couldn’t. I loved you John, and maybe I still do. You’re still the only one who can make me feel human.” Kaidan’s voice sounded heavy at that and Shepard felt his chest tighten along with him. God damn it.

“I love you too.”

Two hours and fifteen minutes until the Omega-4 relay. Shepard swallowed.

“Kaidan,” Kaidan doesn’t answer verbally, instead gives a small ‘hmm?’, “when I’m done with this mission I swear I’ll get back to you, no matter what.” Was it an empty promise? Maybe, but Shepard knew he would be kicking himself later if he didn’t say anything. As much as his drive revoked around saving the galaxy, Kaidan was in the galaxy, so it only made sense to make him a priority. Get in, beat collector ass, get out, see Kaidan. No ship in known existence had ever made it back out of the relay; something Shepard was determined to fight tooth and nail to change. The impossible seemed less daunting with the thought of seeing Kaidan at the end of everything.

“Yeah,” Kaidan said back, “I’ll be looking forward to that.”

#mass effect #commander shepard #kaidan alenko #mshenko #john shepard #pastel fics

[duhragonball]

Dragon Ball Super 097

Live!  At the Null Realm Fairgrounds!  It’s the Tournament of Power!

80 warriors from across the multiverse slug it out!  First prize: a super wish!  Second prize: Death!

Plus, check out the 60′s Batmobile!  On display at the fairgrounds!

And don’t forget Kids’ World, where you can meet Fred Flintstone and Spider-Man!

See KISS in a special live performance!  It’s all here at the Null Realm Fairgrounds!  Exit 103A off of I-69.  Be there!

Okay, so we finally made it!  We’re here!  The part where Dragon Ball Super finally gets good.  I would say “without any further ado”, but the Grand Minister makes a big entrance and insists on going over the rules one more time.  So it takes about five minutes to get rolling, but this is it.  The Tournament of power will start in this episode.

“Assembled gods and mortals, the Omni-Kings requested musical accompaniment for this auspicious occasion, and so we have provided it!  You wanted the best, you got the best.  The hottest band in the world!  KISS!

I needed a gimmick for this thing, a way to raise the stakes, and this is it.  While dozens of cartoon aliens and karate guys battle for their continued existence, I face a different challenge.  Can I liveblog the entire Tournament of Power while also assembling a kickass playlist for the arc?  A playlist made up entirely of KISS songs?  I have a chemistry degree and a one million word fanfic that strongly suggests that I have no limits. 

Anyway, the Grand Minister gives the signal and all these randos you’ve never heard of start fighting.

I remember during the buildup to thing in 2017, I wondered how Toei would even animate a battle royale like this.  Sure, you can kind of do close-ups of just a few characters on the edge of the stage, but you have to zoom out sometime, and what happens then?  Well, they solved this problem the same way Dragon Ball solves a lot of other problems: With explosions. 

For the next several episodes, everybody who isn’t getting screen time in this show will be firing off huge ki blasts with little to no effect.  And it’s glorious.

The Grand Zenos are blown away and we’re only a few seconds into this thing.

As for Team Universe 7, well, Gohan had a game plan, but he can only get half the team to follow it.  Goku, Vegeta, 17, and 18 all rush off to fight, and Frieza decides he can’t pass up a chance to enjoy his one-day pass from hell. 

From the bleachers, the gods wondered why they even bothered trying to prepare for this, which sort of proves my point about Episodes 68-96.  A lot of those episodes focused on everyone talking about this tournament and preparing for it, but most of those preparations amount to nothing. 

For example, there was a scene where Universe 3 showed off an enhanced fighter with special mechanical limbs designed for avoiding elimination and sweeping fighters out of the ring.  But Hit wrecks that dude right off the bat.

Oh, and Basil too.  Narirama doesn’t get eliminated in this episode, but it doesn’t really matter, since his whole game plan just got shot to hell.  And it only took a few seconds of this episode to introduce the dude and then take him down.  That other episode where he strutted his stuff was pointless.

Speaking of Basil, he manages to knock another fighter out of the ring.  This is Ryelibeu, one of the few contestants who has wings and could fly under the unique conditions of the Tournament stage.

But she’s so overwhelmed by the fall that she forgets to use her wings, and so she tumbles down into the abyss until she’s suddenly teleported to the bleachers.  Rumsshi is none too pleased about his team being the first to suffer an elimination, but Gowasu says there’s nothing they can do about it, which is the most Gowasu line ever.  Seriously, why did he even bother fielding a team?  I get the impression Gowasu would enjoy nonexistence.

At this point, the Grand Minister shows the Zenos how to use their GodPad devices to keep track of the ring-outs.  Nearby, a guy in a Fred Flintstone costumes watches on as they mark off Rylibeu.  Fred is eerily silent, as he isn’t supposed to say anything for this job.  But if he were the real Fred Flintstone, he would surely be saying “Yabba Dabba Doo!  That’s it for Rylibeu!”

Meanwhile, a bunch of guys try to gang up on Gohan’s squad, but they stand their ground and stay in this thing. 

There’s not much to call here.  It’s just absolute chaos.  Goku really wants to pick up where he left off against Top, but other fighters keep getting in Goku’s way.  When Top finally does fight back, some other guy attacks Top, so Goku’s going to have to accept the opponents that present themselves.

Goku catches a glimpse of Jiren, but before he can do anything about it, he gets grabbed by Nink, a big dope from Universe 4.  Nink doesn’t seem to be long on smarts, so his plan is to drag Goku to the edge and eliminate himself and Goku at the same time.  The spectators praise Nink for his smarts, as this is a great way to take out a team’s star player and gain an advantage, except, no.  This is a terrible idea.

Case in point, Goku only seems to be in a pinch because he’s trying to conserve his strength.  So when it looks like he’s doomed, he finally uses Super Saiyan Blue to escape, and Nink winds up eliminating himself for nothing.  The problem with this sort of strategy is that U4 only has ten fighters on the board, so they can’t affort to waste them like this.  Even if Nink’s plan had succeeded, that would only leave Universe 7 in a bad position.  The other six teams would be just fine, and U4 would have to deal with them without Nink’s help.  I don’t think that’s a bargain.

Also, U4 really had no idea what Goku was capable of, so they never stopped to consider if Goku could be eliminated this way.  It’s a bad enough strategy when it’s guaranteed to succeed, but when it’s a gamble?  It’s foolish.

But as Goku recovers from that near-defeat, he finds himself surrounded by Universe 9 fighters.  Looks like they’ve decided Nink had the right idea, but this time they’re going to use more manpower to make it happen.  What could possibly go wrong?

Meanwhile, Spider-Man is having a blast.

#dragon ball #dragon ball super #2023dbapocryphaliveblog #tournament of power #look i'm not gonna bother tagging everyone in this thing so just forget it okay?

[themovieblogonline]

Invincible Season 2 Teaser Gets Meta With Fans' Expectations

Invincible was one of the best new animated shows of 2021. Premiering on Amazon Prime Video, the long-awaited comic book adaptation blew everyone’s mind with its heartfelt story and brutal action. Even the animation style heralded back to Saturday morning cartoons. But with a successful season 1, fans have been anxious for any news of season 2. And with the release of a new Invincible season 2 teaser, it looks like we won’t have to wait too long. Well, hopefully not, anyways. Read on for more on the next season of Invincible. Invincible Season 2 Teaser References The Show’s Delay Invincible was a graphic novel series from Robert Kirkman, Cory Walker and Ryan Ottley. The series was so well done, that a film adaptation was in the works for a long time. The film adaptation saw Seth Rogen and producing partner Evan Goldberg attached as writers and directors. Those plans, unfortunately, never really went anywhere beyond the development stage. But a new animated series finally got made, with Rogen and Goldberg involved, and really took off! It was a great addition to adult superhero stories like Prime Video’s other original, The Boys. However, Invincible still had a twinkly-eyed, childhood wonder and optimism to it. It also subverted a lot of superhero tropes and expectations. The voice cast was fantastic with Steven Yeun leading the way as the titular Invincible aka Mark. But also J. K. Simmons as his father, Omni Man, Sandra Oh as his mom, and a plethora of A-list talent involved. So when Invincible season 1 was such a smash hit, fans wanted season 2. Like, right away. Which is a little unreasonable given it’s an animated show, which takes significantly longer to produce than live-action. Something that the Invincible season 2 teaser reminds fans of. Animated Shows Are A Lot Of Work Guys. Chill! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjDOpHuUppU The Invincible season 2 teaser begins with Invincible and one of his foes turned friends from season 1, Allen the Alient, sharing a meal at a burger joint. After some small talk, Allen asks Invincible when the world will get more of him. To which Invincible replies that he’s been busy with writing, voice-acting, animating, colour correction and a bunch of other stuff, related to the production of his animated show. As we see all those efforts reflected on screen. It was a meta moment when he’s basically pointing out everything involved in creating a show of this scale. Allen immediately dismisses most of this as ‘made up’, and forces Mark to provide a date. And so, Mark reveals that Invincible season 2 will premiere in late 2023. Not really specific, but at least we know that it will probably be in the second half of this year. The teaser ends with Allen revealing his inability to understand how Earth dates work. It’s a pretty hilarious teaser, but also incredible given when you realize that they must’ve animated, written and performed this just for a teaser itself. Unlike usual teasers which are scenes from the new season, it looks like Invincible either animated this whole sequence or repurposes an existing scene with new dialogue. But the latter seems unlikely. It’s a testament to how awesome this show is. But also lets fans know that the creators are listening and giving them what they want. Within reason. Invincible season 2 premieres on Amazon Prime Video in late 2023. Ish. Are you excited for the new season of Invincible? Let me know in the comments below. Read the full article

[knullanon]

invincible bullshit that i came up with 10 days ago i just forgot about it

ngaoevnbiaebiw its here @anxiousnerdwritings i hope you like it i got inspired by you to write this

words: 2196

warnings: past arguing, MAJOR SPOILERS FOR ENTIRE SEASON 1, shooting, arguing, past manipulation

“Reports of who killed the Guardians of the globe are starting to surface, with our agents finding out about the supposed killer: we know they spared Omni-Man, killed the rest of the members, and then fled. We also know they are not from earth. Lots of people have speculated that Omni-Man is the one behind these killings, however, the government has ruled out that being a possibility, since there was no evidence of Omni-Man doing these actions. More at 7 tonight on-”

The program stopped playing as you saw a contact appear on the top of the screen, and reading it, you immediately perked up.

Swiping on the green button, you happily said, “Hey, Dad! What’cha need?”

You heard a chuckle from the other end, before he said, “Hey kiddo, how you holding up?”

“Nothing much going on here, you good over there?”

“Yup, mostly everything is fine. You know my work, they always have something for me to do.”

“Hopefully that clears up soon.”

“Yeah, hey, listen, where are you right now?”

Ugh, not this again. Your mood slightly dropped as you remembered a few years ago, when you first met Cecil. He wasn’t as good as he is now, and he would always be asking where you would be. Even in school. However, that was all in the past, since you were older, he now knew that you were responsible enough to do things on your own. At least, that’s what he wanted you to believe.

“Uh, well, I was just gonna go hang out with some friends and then go back home. Why?”

“Ok, listen to me very carefully: one of my guys is gonna pick you up near Bridgetown, ok? You’re gonna get a bracelet from them and then I’ll explain the rest here.”

What the fuck? “Oh, um, ok, when will they be there?”

“About 5 minutes. Be there soon, love you, bye.”

He hung up the phone quickly, which was extremely rare, even for him, since he would never show his love to you out publicly and you would feel weird if he even did. However, on the phone or in private he was a completely different person, having a great personality and he was an even better dad.

Well, he did say to hurry up, and 5 minutes. You checked the time and when you saw it was near 1. You strided your way towards the street he told you to meet on, and cheerfully thought of the ways to hang out with your friends after whatever he wanted to do. Maybe you could go to the mall? Maybe the food court? You’ve been meaning to try those damn milkshakes at that new bar everyone is talking about, but it was always so crowded. You never liked crowded places in the first place.

Suddenly, your phone rang again. This time, when you checked, it was your dad again. Strange. It was weird for him to call you twice in a row. He usually got to the point within a few sentences.

Picking up the phone, you said, “Hey dad-”

“________, listen to me. Get to someplace safe now. Get out of the road. Get out of the public. I don't care if you have to go inside someone else’s house, just get out of sight.”

Stopping in the middle of the road you let out some surprised stutters. “Wh- Dad, what are you talking about?”

“_______, please, just listen to me when I say this, you are in danger and you need to get out of there.”

“Why? What’s happening?”

You were shuffling around trying to find a good place to “hide” while your dad went into complete panic mode in his voice. “_______, find a place to hide, and whatever you do, get out of open space.”

You heard him speak to someone off the phone, before he cursed out loud. “I have to call you back, but someone will be there, wherever you are, ok? I… I love you.”

Before you could answer him, he hung up the phone. Anxiety was the only thing you could feel, as you looked around the desolate neighborhood. There was a reason why you chose this area over others: it was quiet and small. Not only that, but the only people who walked this way were people who were not fond of bigger crowds. In fact, you haven’t seen anyone go this way for a long time. You always wondered why, since it was the perfect way to get robbed. Of course, that would never happen, especially with all those lessons from your dad about self defense.

The street you were on had walls surrounding the sidewalk to prevent people from going into people's backyards, probably. They were too high up to climb, and they were concrete, so it wouldn’t be easy to just hop over and call it a day.

However, you were almost at the end of the street, and you knew there was a little patch of bushes and leaves that would provide the perfect cover. They were almost as tall as your dad, which always made you wonder who was watering them to be that big.

Pacing quickly towards the end of the street, and seeing no one in sight made you let out a sigh of relief. Either dad was overeating or something bad was happening, and you don’t know which would be worse. When Cec- dad overrated, it always got messy, no matter what it was about.

“Why were you out so long? I was about to send a team after you-”

“Cecil, it’s fine, I just had to talk to my-”

“Don’t call me Cecil, and don’t try to make excuses, tell me who you were with right now or I swear to god-”

You forgot the memory almost as soon as it came up, instead choosing to focus on getting to the brush where you could hide until C- Dad came to pick you up. Wherever he was. Actually, did he give you a time that he would be there?

You got a weird feeling that made you sprint towards the bushes and dive in, like there was someone behind you. You ignored it and forced your way on all fours, ignoring the cuts and scratches you were getting on your arms and legs.

There was almost a whooshing sound above you, and you wondered if your dad sent a fucking jet to get you. But that thought left your mind when you heard it right next to you, along with the sound of someone making a harsh landing onto the street. You were able to hear the little bits and pieces of concrete fly off the ground to hit the ground again.

You stayed completely still, leaning on your arms while your body was facing the street. You heard something shuffle, like moving fabric around, before a familiar voice hit your ears.

“Who’s there?” they- he said, and you were about to cry out of relief when you heard it. “Omni-Man?”

~~~~~

“Cecil, why do you think Nolan would go after ________?”

“Why wouldn’t he?” Cecil didn’t look at Debbie, instead focusing on the map in front of him, wondering where Mark could’ve been.

“What reason would he have to go after them? I just- he wouldn’t just attack a child, would he?”

Cecil felt his head start to hurt. Goddamnit, why did Nolan want to go after you? You had nothing to do with anything, besides being Cecil’s daughter. … is that why he was after you? Just because you were related to Cecil?

No, Nolan wasn’t stupid. He knew you weren’t his biological daughter, Nolan knew Cecil took you from somewhere.

He probably thought you were just someone that he got for fun, which was the furthest from the truth. Cecil didn’t-

“Sir, we’ve found Mark Grayson, along with your daughter, not at the same locations, but-”

“Where is she?” Cecil didn’t try to hide his worry in his voice. It didn’t exactly help when the agent said, in a monotone voice, “She's with Omni-Man, sir.”

~~~~~

“________? What are you doing here?”

Peeking out from the bush, you saw Omni-Man walk up towards you and hold out his hand. You graciously took it, and helped yourself up. Even when you were standing at your full height, Omni-Man was way taller than you. Like, way taller. He could beat your dad within an inch of his life even with all of that combat stuff he learned over the years.

Of course he could, he’s Omni-Man dumbass. Ignoring the thought, you answered, “I’m, uh, busy.”

You saw him give a small smile. “You’re busy hiding in the bushes?”

“Yes.” you cursed internally for answering that so quickly like an idiot. You weren’t expecting him to let out a laugh. He continued while you stood there, confused as all hell.

Finally, he said, “You know, you’re a terrible liar.” You laughed along with him for a moment, before saying, “Yeah, I know.”

His face suddenly darkened, before he said, “So, why are you out here?”

The laughter in the air was gone now, only replaced by crushing silence as he waited for your answer. You felt yourself shrink under his scrutinizing gaze. He looked like he was judging you for just standing there. Well, he could’ve also been judging you because you were in a bush just 10 seconds earlier. After a few more seconds, you broke.

“C- Dad said to hide somewhere.”

“Aren’t you too old to be playing those games?”

“Yeah, I am, but apparently someone was gonna come and get me. He just said to get out of open space.”

You heard him mutter something under his breath, before he scratched the back of his head.

“Well, I can see why he would want that.”

“Really? Why?”

“A mob boss named Machine Head.” When you gave him a confused look, he elaborated, “Machine head was a guy who took down the new Guardians of the Globe along with… Mark. They thought they got him, but unfortunately they weren’t able to kill him.”

“How does that have anything with me?”

“... You’re Cecil’s daughter. Cecil was the one who found out about Machine Head. And took him down. Machine Head wants revenge against Cecil for ruining his plans, so he’s probably going to take it out on you.” When you still gave a surprised stare, he asked, “Do you really not have this happen often?”

“No, Dad keeps me inside alot…” your voice trailed off when you heard your phone ring, and picking it up, you saw it was your dad.

“Hello?”

“_________, I told you to get to somewhere safe!”

“I-I am! I’m with Nolan!”

“Hey, Cecil, don’t worry, I’m right here.” Nolan’s voice was filled with sarcasm, probably an old joke between the two. After all, they were both good friends to each other.

“No, you don’t understand, ______, listen to me-”

Suddenly you were grabbed by your arm, and dragged down. You were caught by Omni-Man before you hit the ground, though. Looking behind him, you saw two trucks coming towards you, along with multiple people in them, with weapons of all sorts.

You didn’t have time to ask who they were or what they wanted, as Omni-Man grabbed you and pulled out off the ground, and into the air. It took you a few moments, but you realized you were in the air. Flying.

Reaching for your phone in your pocket to call your dad back, you realized you must’ve dropped it. However, you weren’t about to waste your energy trying to get it back. Especially not when you were high above the ground. So you simply hung on for dear life as Omni-Man flew away from the shouting people in the cars.

~~~~~

“Where is she?”

“She went with Omni-Man, sir.”

Cecil stood there for a moment, wondering what the fuck happened. It was obvious now that Nolan had no intentions to harm you, but why would he take you and not tell you anything? Cecil wondered before something was handed to him. “We found this near where they took off, sir.”

It was your phone. Completely crushed to bits. “Omni-Man took it from her and crushed it without her knowledge, sir.”

“You started to shoot at her?! What the hell were you thinking!?”

The men stood there, completely still realizing their mistake. “We’re not kids playing at some game, this is real life. And now- I-” he really wanted to kill Nolan now. Debbie was going to become a widow, and he really didn’t care.

Walking up to the truck that was nearest to him, he opened the back and shuffled around, trying to find something, anything that would be of use.

Then he found his favorite gun. The only one he could actually hold himself without another person that stopped Omni-man.

Loading the ammunition, he walked over to Donald, who had a tablet in his hand. “Sir, we’ve found where they’re going.”

Looking at the area on the map, Cecil tapped his wrist watch, and said, “Good. Get the backup ready, and get Mark Grayson. Get Invincible.”

#yandere invincible #yandere nolan grayson #yandere cecil stedman #originally i was gonna put the invincible logo at the end but i didn't want to do that much work cuz im tired rn

[chrisevansszn]

Valleys and Mountains Pt 5🏔

Final Chapter

1.7k

18 and up only ‼

“I want a fucking divorce!!”

“I’m not giving you shit.”

“Why??? So, you can have your cake and eat it too? Who do you think you are??”

“I want my fucking marriage and wife back. Is that so hard? Yes, I’ve been talking to Cree but its because you’ve been ignoring me.”

“You narcissistic fucker you!”

He shakes his head.

“You know what! Your right! I have been fucking Jason to get back at you. You don’t deserve me!”

What the fuck are you thinking!

Chris swings in your direction but punches a hole through the wall. You are completely frozen in fear. He steps back and looks at his hand. There is blood coming from his knuckles. He grabs a kitchen towel, runs the kitchen sink to wet it and wraps it around his hand. He walks out of the kitchen and up the stairs without making a sound or eye contact with you.

You bent over finally catching your breath as tears run down your face. You didn’t move for about 15 minutes, stuck in that one spot. You finally looked back at the wall to see the damage. A perfect hole all the way through. You grabbed a paper towel and wiped your face as you headed to your room. You went straight to your closet to grab your suitcase to pack up some clothes. A night or two at a hotel is a must right now. There is no way you are staying here! You haphazardly throw clothes and shoes into your suitcase. You heard footsteps behind you and slowly turned around. Chris was standing there.

The silence in the room was excruciating.

“I’m going to a hotel.”

“I will go if you want me to.”

You swallowed.

“No, I don’t want to be here.”

You stood up to walk past Chris, he grabbed your arm as you walked past. You turned and looked at him.

“Y/N, I’m sorry for everything. I really am.”

You pulled your arm away and continued to your bathroom to get more stuff. Chris followed.

“Are you invited Jason to your hotel?”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing! Fucking men!

“YOU HAVE A LOT OF FUCKING NERVE CHRISTOPHER! MEN WILL CHEAT AND FUCK UP THEIR MARRIAGE BUT THE MOMENT A WOMEN GETS EVEN THEY CAN’T HANDLE IT!”

“I can’t handle it!  The thought makes me so fucking sick!”

You rolled your eyes, grabbed your shit, and finished packing. You headed out the door with Chris on you heels. He didn’t say or do anything. He watched as you put your shit in the car and drive away. You went to an Omni hotel and booked for a couple of nights. You texted your boss saying you needed a couple of days off for personal reasons. Your hotel room was all you were going to see for the next two days.

Chris called but you let it go to voicemail, begging for forgiveness, and do go to marriage counseling. You didn’t reply back. The next two days you laid in bed, rarely ate anything, and had room service to bring you bottle after bottle. You slept and drank the days away.

Day two came and it was time for check out. You headed back home as it rained cats and dogs outside. You pulled into the driveway. Chris’ truck was parked. You took a deep breath and walked into the house.  Chris was sitting at the dining room table, he looked God awful. You can tell he hasn’t been sleeping. You paused and stared at each other.  

“Y/N.”

You waited.

“Yes.”

“I am so sorry about everything. Can we go to marriage counseling?”

Marriage counseling isn’t such a bad idea. This can only go two ways…the marriage heals, or the marriage ends. Do you even want to be married anymore?

“Sure. Set it up.”  You walked off. You had a lot to consider, you and Chris both did dirt maybe you can really patch things up and move forward.

The day has come, your first counseling session. Chris found a young lady who was well qualified. You did the whole introduction thing. You thought maybe this would do some good but let me remind everyone of what Christopher said.

“Chris & Y/N, thank you for coming in today. This is a place where you can express exactly how you feel. Now, who wants to go first?”

“I will.”, Chris said. “I think a divorce is the best option.”

You turned your head so quickly.  You couldn’t believe what this asshole just said.

“Wait Chris isn’t there another option here. I thought you wanted to save your marriage?”, the counselor said.

You didn’t say anything.

“I’ve been thinking, about everything. Both of us stepping out on our marriage, Y/N disappearing for a couple of days, and our fight.”

“I only slept with Jason to get back at you.”, you snapped.

“Don’t ever say his name in front of me again.”

“Or what? You started this whole mess!”

“Please now I need both of you to settle down. We have to have civil conversation here.”

You got up and walked off. You needed a minute. After all this man has put you though, he thinks he can initiate the divorce?? The doctors retrieve you from the hallway, and you go back inside. Chris hadn’t moved a muscle. You and Chris go back and forth, its literally the blame game.

Thank God you both took separate cars! This first session was a nightmare. What had gotten into Chris?

You made it home before Chris. He actually didn’t walk through the door until later. You sat on the couch waiting for him. A real conversation was needed.

Chris finally walked through the door.

“Chris.”

“What is it?”

“What was that shit today? You beg me to go to counseling and then you start off by saying you want a divorce? What do you want to do?”

He rolled his eyes. The fucking audacity.

“I’ve had time to think. I am sick of begging you to make this marriage work. I’ve done nothing but BEG you.”

“So, you want a divorce? Tell me now because I am not wasting my time going to counseling with you.”

He sat up and put it hands on his hips. You hated that shit.

“Yes, I want a divorce. I want to be with Cree.” He looked at the ground as he said those words.

“EXCUSE ME? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?”

“You heard me.”

You completely lost it.

“FUCK YOU CHRIS! I FUCKING HATE YOUR GUTS!

You went and pushed him on his face!

“Y/N, don’t do that shit!”

Chris gave you a slight push to put space between you two.

“Get out now…”

“I pay the damn mortgage on this home!”

“PACK YOUR SHIT AND GET THE FUCK OUT!”

Chris gives you a look. He walks past you and heads to the bedroom. You leaned back against the nearest wall. You had to take some deep breaths. You walked over to the couch and sat. You could hear Chris slamming the dresser as he packed up. Not a tear fell down your face this time, you just wanted him gone.

About 10 minutes later Chris walks by with a suitcase, grabbed his keys, his wallet, and walked out the door. You grabbed your MacBook and sat back on the couch with a glass of wine and begin searching for divorce lawyers.

You didn’t want to tell anyone what was going on yet. You were too embarrassed. After searching, you found lawyer and decided to call in the morning. You didn’t get any sleep that night per the usual. You headed to work the next day and called the lawyer to set up a meeting to get the ball rolling.

A week went by and you and Chris haven’t communicated not once. Jason was texting, but you weren’t responding at all.  The meeting with the lawyer was productive, she got all the paperwork together for you to get Chris to sign.

A few days later, you heard the door unlocking as you ate dinner in the kitchen while working. Chris walked in. He looked at you and you looked right back at your screen.

He walked over.

“I got the documents today from your lawyer.”

You looked up.

“Let’s talk about this.”

“There is nothing to discuss, sign the papers. If you want the house, then buy me out, if not…it goes on the market.”

You stood up to take your plate to the sink. Chris follows behind.

“I’m not ready to let you go.” He steps a little closer.

“This marriage is over.”

“Please Y/N.”

Chris leans in and kisses you softly on your lips, it caught you off guard.

“Absolutely not. Don’t ever kiss me again.”

“I’m your husband.”

“Does your new girlfriend know that you are here? I wonder how she would feel knowing you are making a move on your ex-wife?”

“Don’t say that.”

“Like I said, sign the divorce papers so I can move on.”

“Whatever. My lawyer will be in contact with yours.”

Chris walked away to the bedroom to get more clothes and such. He comes back out 20 minutes later.

“You’re already packing up shit?”

“Yes. When you sign, I’m out.”

He said something under his breath and headed out the door with his stuff. A couple of days later your lawyer called and said Chris accepted the terms.

A few weeks later you and Chris sat down with your lawyers to sign the divorce papers. As you both walked out, you noticed a young girl sitting outside the room. You finished up the conversation with your lawyer and headed out. You walked by and the young girl smirked at you. It had to be Cree. You stopped.

“Did you just smirk at me?” You wanted all the smoke.

“I’m just glad this is all finalized.”

“You must be Cree the whore. Well, best of luck to you.”

You turned to Chris.

“Did you tell Cree about you kissing me a few weeks ago when you came to get more stuff?” You faced Cree. “Don’t worry sweetie. I stopped him, but just know he was ready to risk it all.”

You turned and headed down the hall, and into your new single life!

Hope you all enjoyed this series! 💛

@whxre4cevans

@supernatural-fan151

@fallenoutofrose

@itscrazycherryblossomcollection

@coldmuffinpartycloud

@art-estrange

@coffeebooksandfandom

@arabescapr

@firoozehmoon

@mssukeyna

@tantricevans

@marvelfansworld

@pmb1976

@marvelsis

#chris evans #chris jamal evans #cevans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x reader #fanfiction

[batarangsoundsdumb]

yet another ask dump yeehaw!

do you ever think that jay's mother was one of those bitch who believes in horoscope and tarots and things like that and so he believes in these things too, or it is just me projecting?

sheila haywood took one look at jason's birthchart said 'nah this won't do' and left.

Wait, but what happens when the justice league does find out that Bruce and John fucked? Lmao it sounds like it would be hilarious, really, I don’t want a justice league that doesn’t make fun of Bruce for like his entire life.

barry runs out of the meeting immediately and comes back with an entire sti testing kit. diana fully seriously wants bruce to get tested while bruce is sitting there like 'come on guys, you're being ridiculous, i already checked twice'

john is standing in the corner clearly offended while bruce is just like 'don't even say anything, constantine, you fucked a shark'

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

on the one hand, good for him, on the other hand, bro, how do you still have a secret identity when your superhero name is just your last name,,,,

Your fic on ao3 was GOLD PLEASE CONTINUE I loved Dinah's cameo btw ( @purple-vixen

thanks so much! i already continued but this ask is like 10 years old because i'm a notorious procrastinator (also yes! i love dinah so much aahhhhhhhhhhhh)

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

bruce internally: holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit bruce externally: get out of my city, alien

AHHH ur multimedia fic is the only thing that brings me happiness anymore continue it forever pls

uhh thanks, but can't continue it forever because my attention span is that of a toddler on crack on a good day and i can't function without at least 10 things going on at the same time and music in the background

Oi, so I'm getting into dc and watching batman the animated series, and they use fruitcake a lot. Which I thought was very funny and wanted to share w you - Denilla

wait like fruitcake (food) or fruitcake (derogatory) ?

young justice 🤝 teen titans slut shaming batman

tim drake and dick grayson to their respective teams 'you guys stop it, that's my dad'

Happyhoganon: If an eighty year old Batman had fought crime in Gotham City for decades and the only threats to him and the city lately are a wheel chair bounded Penguin, your usual purse snatchers and a few con artists popping up every now and then, how well could the Dark Knight do in maintaining the peace in Gotham despite him being just somewhat fit to do that as an elderly man (which says A LOT given how old he is)

uhh he'll probably do what my grandpa does and that is ruthlessly prank them until they die of shame.

in the death in the family interactive movie there's an ending where Jason is tasked with raising Damian and he decides he's gonna raise Damian to take down the waynes and al ghuls which uh maybe isn't great BUT the idea of Jason raising Damian... PRICELESS. CHAOTIC. I just need more people to know about this :)

yes i saw that wow holy shit but jason would accidentally drop damian on his head one (1) hour in and jason just yeets him into the lazarus pit.

Headcanon: The Penguin has a really hard time fighting any of the Robins because of his avian obsession means there's always a small part of his mind that's like "Birb. Child. Protect" ( @subspacecadet )

as soon as dick becomes nightwing the penguin is like 'you know what, fuck this dude' and shoots at him.

Y'all talking about King Shark dating Constantine, let's not forget about John literally hooking up with Satan

listen there's a clear difference between monsterfucker and satanfucker in that king shark is literally a shark and satan still looks like a normal dude

Does everyone in Gotham think Batman is a teen dad?

everyone in gotham thinks batman has been around since gotham was founded, but they do think that bruce wayne is actually a teen father and dick grayson's biological dad.

why. why would you do that fancast when you know it will only hurt people

what? i loved my fancast it was really well done. i did it with good representation in mind and i really managed that with alfred pennyworth being ✨italian✨

Seeing james charles a jason gave me psychic damage how dare you i need to wash my eyes

well that's a you problem isn't it?

do you think dick grayson thirst tweets about nightwing just to annoy his family/cause problems on purpose in general?

he thinks nightwing is hot, next question.

holy jiminy cricket batman, its as cold as the good lords ass crack in here!!

i- what? this is why i don't fuck with english expressions it's way too goddamn weird

Brooooooo, your teen dad!Bruce au is soooo good. I've got brainrot.

Honestly if you ever write anymore, I'd read that shit twice. Sign me the fuck up. Good stuff, Good Stuff.

uh yeah i'm thinking about writing a fic, but i have exams coming up and i don't wanna fail because that would suck. but after i'll certainly be writing more tho

your teen dad AU is so great! bruce acting like a big brother for all of like a week before he's telling everyone about his son. what if in the AU dick meets the JL because they need to rescue him? maybe he's in trouble/kidnapped at a gala and bruce starts calling for JL. clark finds him and has to fly with dick to bring him home - that's how dick and clark meet and superman becomes dick's fave hero. he goes around the manor thinking he can fly with a red blanket draped around him like a cape.

actually- if you want a young dad! bruce fic with like that kinda stuff(just with damian) go check uhh- in for a penny by cdelphiki. it's really good and bruce is like 24/25-ish. (and dick's there!!!)

This account has solely convinced me that Tim is a trash goblin ( @hamilcat-and-magic-turtle )

because he is. that boy has slept in dumpsters on multiple occasions even if he is the son of a billionaire.

Okay but when you said victory dance I did think of the whole justice league defeating the big bad and then they all start flossing

well that's exactly what hal jordan does and that's why batman uses a gun now. no but the victory dance in my opinion is like the 'we're all in this together' dance from high school musical.

The horrors in Invincible s1 was nothing compared to the comics, I cant wait for s2

oh well okay, i mean i personally react to horror and violence by laughing awkwardly so i can't wait to be called a monster for accidentally laughing at a mass murder.

I'm currently watching Batman: The Brave and The Bold and- Bruce is just talking about Oliver like he's an old love (@nightwings-kid)

okay im going to watch that lmao that's totally and completely in character for him tho.

The invincible comic is like super gratuitous with its violence so much so I'm shocked the show was able to adapt it in a faithful way! Anyway had the show been live action it absolutely wouldn't have the same impact as it does as an animated show and I'm so glad so many people agree with me on that

also because a live action casting would've been like uhh amanda stenberg for amber, the dude- the guy from the supernatural but with a mustache for omni-man, and scarlet johanssen for debbie grayson

Debbie grayson is a milf, yes. You're welcome for the invincible propoganda, now you can questions your life. Bruce def seems like the perfect father next to Omni-man. Like they really took a rip off justice league and I was like well, now I'm attached even tho I was like hah I know who they're supposed to be. And then bam- death gore death gore gore gore sad Mark grayson just had to have daddy issues. Why does every character have daddy issues. I'm sick of the attacks

because daddy issues make a person arguably funnier, that's why i'm not even remotely funny (haha good dad flex). i liked that it was dark contextually, but not in the colouring, bc i hate when it's like 'uh yeah graphic murder and now a shot so dark you have to sit in a dark room and squint at the screen to faintly see the characters. (like dcau ugh)

About the Wayne insurance, for a moment I thought you would put the video with moans over the waves.

i mean- i could've done that, but rick rolling seemed more family friendly.

Its the first time in forever that im surpise rickrolled, i usually expect it. Congratulations (i really should know better this is tumblr)

i get rickrolled so often but i actually like the song so i dont really give a fuck

Actually, my information about Damian and John's kids is outdated because it was revealed that the old men telling the kids stories about the Supersons were actually Jon and Damian the whole time. I was blinded by my thirst for Grandpa!Bruce Wayne but I was wrong... I liked my version better, tbh (@artemisa97)

fair enough. but i'd honestly like to see damian and jon getting together, just because it's a really fun dynamic and their friendship was really cute when they were kids. (also idk maybe it would be nice to have one (1) main batfam/superfam character that's not cishet)

How am i JUST finding your blog skdskfkd you're so fucking funny and ur takes are hot

i thought u were calling me hot :( but youre not :( crime detected (but lmao thanks)

So I have depression and I swear that your memes are one of the few things that have made me laugh so thank you 💛🥺 (@katekanebadass)

aw you're welcome, and i hope you're doing okay!

The metropolis memes are so funny, I love them 💀😌

i think metropolis is also so fucking funny it deserves more attention imagine having your entire police force being upstaged by an alien from kansas and his kids

as an american i feel your complete lack of knowledge of us geography is just so sexy (platonic) ❤️

thanks so much (i also don't know any other geography, i'm not kidding, like you can tell me you're from hungary and it will just blank, there will be nothing that comes to mind)

In the DC universe they don't say "Can't have shit in Detroit" they say "Can't have shit in Gotham"

this just reminds me of that guy whose porch got stolen like the steps to his door, and i'm thinking of people living in gotham and waking up without a front door and going "can't have shit in gotham"

honestly all i know about chicago is the bean, so. what would gotham's famous sculpture be?

gigantic gargoyle statue in front of one of the police precincts because a villain thought it was a smart way to keep the police inside, but it's too heavy to move.

why tf do people go on about how batman "works alone" or how he's the "lone wolf" when he like 38290202 members in his family

bc people think it's cool that a grown man in his 30s has no friends or family instead of calling it what it is (sad)

Bruce is gotham's sugar daddy

why would say something so controversial yet so brave.

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

dick: gerard way are you in position, gerard way are you in position

tim: for the last fucking time, my codename is 'totally not count olaf' this week, abbafan 3000

dick: shut up my codename isn't 'abbafan 3000'

dick: it's 'abbafan number 1' and you know it

I have a feeling Tim drake is ur favourite batfamily member but okay u don't have favs if u say so ok

i mean he is, i won't deny it. but i love each and every one of the batfam just the same, i just have a weak spot for short dumbass nerds, because i'm a short dumbass nerd.

Omg i fuckin love boy meets world too fam shsjkfk

bro boy meets world was the shit!!! it was just fire and awesome and so fucking great like bro. it was so good im not even going to be accepting criticism

you know I find the whole "joker completes batman" thing a bit disgusting considering the horrendous stuff the batfamily went through because of the joker and let's not get started on the "joker has a point" thing like yeah he's this cool complex villain but he's absolutely batshit crazy

like yes! i get what you mean the joker just fucking sucks man he doesn't do shit for batman's character or the batfam he's literally just annoying as fuck. like the joker has a point' shit is so stupid. i will accept 'magneto was right' because he fucking was and i think he didn't do anything wrong, but joker? he's just like that. he's not even cool and complex he's just a weirdo with a bleach kink at this point.

ALSO YOUR RACISM POST- SO TRUE BESTIE

thanks bestie, i'm glad you agree.

in today's essay of why I think cass should become batman- I was thinking Tim would probably be the most efficient batman in many ways but I also think he wouldn't want to be batman tbh none of the batfamily members would want to be batman because they're trying to outgrow him but cass is the one who wants to represent the symbol that is batman

absofuckinglutely i will say it again and again that cass represents the batsymbol more than anyone in the batfam, in batgirl (2000) she literally didn't care about anything else than bruce's oath to not kill, she thought the batsymbol was more important than anything in gotham. she's just an excellent character because her motivation to not kill is not 'i'm scared i can't come back from it' or 'well my dad says no murder so i'll go along with it' but that she's killed somebody as a young child and she never wants to kill a human ever again and that's so fucking beautiful for a new batman like yes.

need more cass, duke and tim inclusion in gothamite memes

yes yes, a tall order of cass, duke and tim coming up in 1-14 business days

oldest to youngest batfam members cus I'm confused as shit

okay order of being taken in: dick, jason, tim, cass, damian, duke order of age: alfred, bruce, dick, cass, jason, tim, duke, damian (though cass and jason are around the same age general consensus is that cass is a little older)

I'm so confused Steph is a redhead?? like how was it that hard to get this right? the source material is literally right there and free

cw is jared, 19

do you receive anon hate? if so, how do you deal with it

uh no, i'm not remotely popular enough to get anon hate and i also don't say a lot of things that would attract anon hate, but i do send anon hate to @the-real-peter-parker because he forgot about the specialists from winx club

Wait how many languages do you speak??

uhh- 5 if you include latin, but that's a dead language and i'm really bad at it. but english, my native language, german, and french also, tho german and french not fluently.

You can mix aguaepanela with aguardiente 😈 and is tasty

okay but now i'm curious if the liquor deserves the 😈 emoji or if that's a you problem. but i googled it and it looks like something you'd take one sip of and then not remember the rest of your evening.

#i love all of you guys so much thanks for all these asks #some of these are literally from march but fuck it #the day tumblr puts dates next to anon messages is the day i close my inbox crawl into a hole and die #it's such a basic task to answer asks but i don't want to bother anyone with asks clogging up their timeline #and if i don't have a funny or good answer i'm like 'uhh okay won't answer it now then' #so this is for you #also i deleted a few asks because it gives me mental pain to see my inbox go over 50 and it's almost at 100 #i was complaining about having too many asks to the-real-peter-parker like months ago and then i had 45 asks in my inbox #now it's amassed to going over 100 twice #but no i love all of you and you're great and you're all fantastic and i lvoe you #muchos kiss kiss #kiss kiss for my kiddies lvoe you #invincible spoilers #dc #dcu #dc comics #ask #anon #bataranswers #i really wanna try aguapanela now i'm gonna see if i can find panela somewhere and review it for you babes #uh yeah that's it #muchos gracias for all your questions babes

[ramblinganthropologist]

Headache Relief

Summary: Alistair Shepard’s got one hell of a headache and the medicine ain’t helping. Lucky for him, he’s got another relief option. Problem is he didn’t expect to see Garrus Vakarian involved with that. Fuck, maybe he should’ve taken a double dose after all...

---

There were times Alistair was glad to be human. This wasn’t one of them.

“Fuck…”

The expletive leaked from between his teeth as he stepped off the elevator and into his private quarters. Right then he was running on instinct, heading towards his desk and the drawer that held his only chance of functioning at a lumbering pace. At least he didn’t hit the wall as he slumped down to dig – that was a nice bonus.

The bottle of pills hidden under some paper was half full. He shook two out, swallowing them with a bit of the water he always kept on his desk for that reason. Then it was straight to his bed. The only thing he remembered to do was click off the light as he collapsed face down into his pillow.

Biotic headaches: L2s might have gotten them the worst, but everyone had to face them eventually. Consider it the cost of doing business.

Colors bloomed behind the man’s eyes as he waited and prayed for the medicine to take effect. Part of him knew his chances were slim – his headache had started on the shuttle, so he was clearly out of the full range of help. Still, even if it took the edge off, he could function in an hour or so. At that point it was all Alistair could hope for as he felt the pain pulse.

Yep… he had definitely overdone it with the biotics. Simple mission, his pale and freckled ass.

“You think Miranda would have reinforced that.” His words came out low as he muttered them into his pillow. No doubt the camera she had planted in his room would pick it up, and frankly he didn’t care. It was another point of data that was going to go on his report of things she had messed up bringing him back to life. Was it petty to have a list of complaints with the person who brought him back from the dead?

Probably, but who cared. She’d left him with a functioning uterus, she could deal with the fallout.

At least it gave him something to focus on as he lay there in the dark, begging for some relief from the little pills. Thanks to his medic training, he knew how long it would take for the medicine to absorb into his system. Experience was an even better teacher, however – his biotics would make it go even faster.

It was weird – they were the reason he was taking the medicine, but they were also the reason it worked faster to relieve the pain. Talk about a catch-22.

Alistair laid there for what felt like an eternity, pain still throbbing against his temples. The soft glow of his omni-tool told him enough time had passed that the pills should have worked. Much to his immense displeasure, he still felt the majority of the pain as he rolled over onto his side.

In times like this, there was only one other hope of relief.

Slowly, the biotic rose to a sitting position, head still pounding. He went for the small table beside his bed, digging through the contents. Eventually, he found what he was looking for, buried towards the back. It took a few seconds more, but he pulled it free into the darkness of his quarters.

“Well… at least I don’t have to clean the one in my toolbox for its intended use.” Alistair grumbled to himself as he flicked his vibrator on to make sure it had enough power. He quietly thanked the universe that it buzzed to life as he clumsily unbuckled his belt, then slid out of his pants and upper layer of boxers. At some point, his packer slipped and hit the ground, but he didn’t care. Right then, it was in the way of pulling down his inner layer of underwear.

He lay back on his pillow, naked from the waist down. Usually, he would pull his blanket over so the Illusive Man didn’t get a show, but right then his brain was overriding whatever sense of shame he had left in him. The bastard could get what he paid for as he flicked the power to a medium setting and then applied it. The vibration soon started to flood through his body as he closed his eyes and waited.

This was always the most boring part. Unlike most people, Alistair didn’t watch porn. He didn’t see anything wrong with it, mind you, he just had no interest. The one time he had tried, he had wound up trying to piece together how it had been edited during one of the more heated moments between the actors on screen. By the time he had realized he had been trying to masturbate, his vibrator had long since died and he was long beyond his occasional need to get off.

Such was the fate of one on the asexual spectrum, he supposed.

“Damn it, can’t this go any faster?”

Alistair grumbled as he flicked the setting a little higher than he normally preferred. Then he shifted positions, pressing it a little harder in the hopes that might do something. The sensation was definitely building in his stomach, but it wasn’t nearly to the point he needed.

He sighed, closing his eyes once more. This was probably the point people made something up if they had nothing to watch. He had certainly tried in the past, particularly in his teens. However, those flimsy fantasies never really held up, and more often than not faded to the blackness of the inside of his eyelids within a few seconds. Whether that was because it didn’t work or he was just really bad at constructing sexy scenarios, he didn’t know.

At least it would be able to distract him while he waited for the vibrator to do its thing…

“Come on, think. You’re surrounded by muscular men literally every day, you have to have something in there to work with.”  

Of course, those people were under him now. It made it a little hard to picture anyone like them… under him. Such was the downside of being a commanding officer: anyone on ship was off limits.

…

Well, technically he WAS still considered dead by the Alliance…

“I am only considering this because I need something to focus on other than the damn ceiling.”

Alistair sighed as he did his best to try and imagine someone based on the people around him. Like always, a body slowly materialized with plenty of muscle underneath him, fully erect and ready to go. It didn’t have a face – it never did, thank God – and something about the skin seemed rather plastic-like. More importantly… they were kind of a dead fish. Even as he imagined himself lowering onto the dick, there was no reaction.

It was because he was still a virgin, wasn’t it? He knew he should’ve paid more attention to that porn, but could you blame him? He just HAD to know what kind of camera they were using to film the climax scenes, it worked so well in low light…

“Damn it, Alistair, fucking focus on the fucking…”

But it was no good – the plastic body remained lukewarm, vaguely thrusting in time with the vibrator pressed against his oft ignored clit.  He was right back to where he had started, and his head still pounded. Sighing, Alistair shut off his vibrator and sat up. As soon as he did, his omni-tool began to beep.

54.

“Great. My head hurts, and I’m hypo.” He didn’t bother with fitting his packer back into his underwear. Instead, the Spectre grabbed his boxers and padded over to his emergency sugar supply. A small pile of pixie stick wrappers soon formed as he tried not to mope too much about his inability to fix his headache. At least the sugar made his lips stop feeling numb, but it wasn’t like he had to use them right then.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair and dislodging the rubber band holding it back in the process. “Guess I’ll just try to sleep it off without the added headache relief.”

That was the great thing about being on the ace side of life – no lingering horniness thanks to his inept abilities.

With another sigh, Alistair made his way back to his bed. This time, he slid under the covers and closed his eyes. His head still pounded, but in the quiet of his quarters he found it a little easier to slip into sleep.

---

“Commander…”

“Vakarian, keep on. That’s an order.”

The body beneath him was hot, almost uncomfortably so. Without skin, the surface was hard and a little rocky where plates joined together. It was a little slick too, and not just because of the lube – carapaces were a fucking slip and slide in the bedroom if you weren’t ready for the angles. It was a little uncomfortable, but with positioning - and a little flexibility - things went where they needed to go.

The turian’s eyes were cloudy with blown pupils. He was breathing hard, grasping at the sheets. His erection had long since shown itself, now buried deep.  When he rubbed against it, the collision of their hips made him whimper.

“I can’t hold it much longer…”

He smirked and leaned closed to the strange neck ahead of him, lips barely ghosting against the hard skin. “Are you giving out on me, Vakarian?”

“N-no, sir…” He was panting, trying to rub. But there would be none of that. Alistair shifted his position to make sure he couldn’t find the relief. Beneath him, Garrus whimpered again, and his mandibles fluttered once more.

It was here that he took his time, carefully biting at the sensitive parts of the turian’s neck. The whimpering got so high pitched that the translator couldn’t work with it anymore, and his natural voice broke through. There was something primal about it, and even though he didn’t have full command of the words, it was enough to get him to smirk as he stopped biting and ran a carful finger between two plates.

“What was that?”

Garrus’ voice was breathy when the translator finally kicked in. “N-nothing, sir…”

His grip was iron on the sheets, and his entire body was trembling. There was the point of climax, and then there it was past it. Clearly, he was edging towards the latter. Alistair nodded as he shifted his position, lowering a bit more. Beneath him, Garrus whimpered again.

“You know what you have to say, Vakarian.”

The turian took a shaky breath, eyes so wide they reminded him of a cat. “Yes, Commander…”

Another shaky breath. “Permission to come aboard?”

It was at this point that Alistair shifted again, fully lowering himself against the turian’s sensitive member, nudging his head close to where he heard best. “Permission granted, Vakarian.”

With that, he rubbed the space between plates one last time, working a nail into right where it was the most sensitive. Beneath him, Garrus shuddered as he finally climaxed, his entire body shaking from the force. All the while, he held on, feeling the vibrations and pulse of the turian’s orgasm.

It was at this point he rolled off to protect himself from the withdrawal. The bad thing about turians was that their anatomy was all internal, regardless of gender. That meant Garrus needed to remove the condom before things got stuck and required an embarrassing visit to a doctor for removal.

“Sir… I…”

Alistair carefully removed the condom for the shaking turian, tossing it to the trash. “Can’t have you out of service, Vakarian.”

“Thank you…” Garrus’ voice was still shaky and going in and out of the translator, but his eyes were more focused. “And you, sir?”

This was the point the turian’s careful hand reached toward him, pausing. He knew better. But right then, Alistair allowed it with a nod. Cautious talons soon found his clit, already slick from a combination of the lube and his own heat.

Here it was faster. Garrus was a pro at getting him off with careful strokes that avoided the sharp side of his clipped talons. The heat was beginning to pool in Alistair’s stomach once more, but he fought back a grunt.

After all, it wouldn’t do to show that in front of his men.

---

Alistair’s eyes snapped open as he sat up. His head still ached, but it wasn’t really his focus then.  A familiar sensation of heat was growing in his stomach as his consciousness slowly filtered in. Without pause, he peeled off both the blanket and his boxers. Just like he thought, he was already wet and close to the point.

Barely breathing, he reached for his vibrator and flicked it on. Garrus’ strained voice and shaking hands were still in his mind as he leaned back and let it work. Just the thought of the turian so close to orgasm and unable to do anything about it caused him to shiver, and it was at that point that it kicked into high gear.

After a few seconds, he climaxed with a shudder and a quiet squeak of a moan. Sweating a little, he turned off the vibrations and just lay there in bed, staring up at the covered ceiling. Someone – probably his sister – had stuck glow in the dark stickers to the dark fabric stretched across the skylight. It looked like Orion’s Belt to him, not that he had ever seen it in person.

…

Yeah, he was definitely trying to avoid this.

“Man, fuck me…”

He sighed. On the bright side, the orgasm had done its job – combined with the medicine, it was easier to think now, and his pounding headache had reduced itself to a dull throb that he could work with. However, now he had a new headache as he sat up to head to the shower.

Garrus’ face was still in his head as he stripped and let the hot water hit his back. Just imagining it made his hand want to wander down from its spot pressed against the wall towards his clit. But he resisted the urge as he shook his head, water flying thanks to his wet hair.

“I can’t believe I went there with him. What the hell am I thinking?”

Alistair rested his forehead against the wall, groaning. This wasn’t the first time he’d had thoughts like this, though it was the first with someone he knew. As much as he hated to admit it, something about that kind of control excited him.

Which, given he was a fucking commanding officer, was a nightmare. It wasn’t like he got off to ordering people around, though; that was business, and he took no pleasure in it. These thoughts just popped up in his private life, in the rare internet searches he did in incognito and made sure his omni-tool was blocking everything out.

“And with Garrus… fuck.”

That was probably the worst part of all as he watched the water circle the drain. Things were better with the turian since they had met up on Omega, but there was being civil and… that. Honestly, it felt awful to him as he played it over again in his mind, closing his eyes tightly.

Awful… but also awfully hot.

His free hand brushed against his thigh, fingers finding his clit. As the water poured down, he rubbed slowly, playing the memory over in his brain. His mind kept focusing on the look on Garrus’ face, on his breathy voice breaking translation. Just imagining him whimpering on the edge of climax with nowhere to go made the heat pool in his stomach. Did the real turian look and sound like that when he was so close to the edge?

“Damn it, Vakarian…”

It came out under his breath in an octave he normally couldn’t hit unless he strained at the bottom of his range. Yet at the moment, it was almost effortless as he replayed the turian underneath him, writhing and unable to do anything about it.

Well, nothing except beg anyway.

Of course, there was a downside to jacking off in the shower. Given the fact he was just standing there, the motion activated lights stopped activating, and he was suddenly in the dark. The quick loss of light was enough to snap him out of the dream and take too quick a step back.

And then on his ass he went.

“Fuck!”

Alistair’s vision swam as he winced, reaching up to turn the water off as his ass throbbed from the force of 140 pounds falling onto it. Nothing felt broken, but there was definitely going to be a bruise once he dried off. Lucky for him, nobody was looking there anyway.

“Shepard, I detected a fall. Are you experiencing hypoglycemic shock?”

EDI’s electronic voice made the whole thing worse as he finally stood, soaking wet and feeling rather stupid. He grabbed for a towel and dried off, wincing as he reached his backside. That one was going to be spectacular.

“I don’t have my omni-tool on, EDI. I’ll let you know in a second.”

A few moments later, with a happy CGM, Alistair sat gingerly at his desk. Now he had two dull throbs to keep him company, along with the reminder of just what the fuck he had been doing a few moments prior. His cheeks colored as he rubbed the towel over his wet hair, trying to block it out.

“Shepard?”

Right, EDI…

“It’s fine, EDI. I just was in there too long and I slipped.” He paused, looking out from under the towel towards the blur orb. “Er, thank you for checking on me.”

What could he say, apart from jacking off to the submissive version of his crewmate, he was a polite man.

The orb clicked off, leaving him to his brooding. Alistair groaned a little as he felt the bruise throb once more. Maybe it was the universe punishing him. Didn’t matter, still fucking hurt as he finished drying off.

“I’m probably going to have to avoid Garrus for a little bit.” He frowned. “Can’t have that happen again. It’d be too awkward…”

But then his eye went to his schedule. His stomach dropped at the sight. Thanks to his headache, he had totally forgotten that he was supposed to check the turian’s new implants to make sure everything was ok. As a matter of fact, he had an hour at best.

He could go to Chakwas for that, right? Right?

“I’m so fucked.”

The human rested his soggy forehead on the deck, mentally willing wherever his dream had come from back to whatever hell it had generated. Lucky for him, he was good at repressing things. With any luck, he wouldn’t even think about it by the time the turian got there for the implant check.

After, though? Well… he was pretty sure he was fucked. Next time he was just going to take a double dose of pain pills. After all, with that new stomach and liver he was pretty sure his body could take that kind of beating. It would be better than the other kind, to say the least.

#ramblinganthropologist's writing #Alistair Shepard #Garrus Vakarian #I've been sitting on this a while because I'm not confident writing smut #shakarian

[redheadscribe]

My Invincible Review

Well, this is a little late, but hey, better late than never. My dad and I started watching this show when we were done with Falcon and Winter Soldier, and we wanted other shows to watch. I kept hearing good things about this show, and I have heard about the comic before. Once I watched the first episode, I was hooked, and I really want the second show to come out soon.

The story is about Mark Grayson, a sixteen-year-old boy who just started to develop his own superpowers. He is the son of Omni Man. Basically, this world's Superman, and as the series goes on, Mark learns that well, great power comes great responsibility, sorry not sorry. Aside from that lousy joke, Mark goes through the trials and tribulations of being a superhero and dealing with family drama and teen drama. This review will be heavy spoilers, and so I will go over each character and a few of the story beats. I have not read the comics, so this is all about the TV show.

Let's start with the adults of this series, beginning with Omni Man, voiced by JK Simmons, and JK Simmons excels at this role. He is terrifying, and he is a fascinating antagonist. I say antagonist because no true hero would beat their son into a bloody pulp. Anyway, he is a perfect character, and I enjoyed him. I was terrified of him whenever Deborah was trying to investigate whether or not he was involved with the murder of the Guardians of the Globe as I didn't know what he would do. Knowing that he killed the Guardians while the other characters didn't develop a lot of suspense had me on the edge of my seat. He is a monster, and I wonder what will happen in season two. Overall, I like Omni Man as an antagonist of the series.

Let's talk about Cecil Steadman, and I like him as well. I do not have that much to say about him, except he kind of reminds me a lot of all the government agents from Marvel and DC. Despite him working with the heroes, I enjoy that he would still have some dark moments like recruiting that messed-up doctor who created the reanimen. I am seeing him coming to blows with Mark and other heroes soon.

Now let's get into Eve's parents. I hate her father as almost calling his own child a bitch is not cool. Also, did he cheat as well? I mainly wonder because he was like, forgive Rex as he made a mistake and did no wrong. If he did cheat, I have a lot of questions to ask the mother. Eve was right to leave that toxic household.

Now let's go to Robot Man, and he is an exciting creep. He had to deal with a lot considering what his natural body had to go through, but he often meant well. However, when he started to have this creepy fascination with Monster Girl, I was very uncomfortable with how he interacted with her. I am not a fan of Rexsplode, but he had every right to be freaked out when Robot introduced himself in a younger version of his body. Also, why hasn't he found something to help Monster Girl? He said that he was doing this for her, but Monster Girl needs more help than him just getting a new body.

Next is Black Samson, and I like him. I was pretty happy when he got his powers back, and I love his character. I loved his interaction with the New Guardians. I apologize that I don't have that much to say about him, but I do like his character.

Lastly, I'll talk about my favorite adult character is Deborah Grayson, the best mom ever. Also, fuck you, Nolan, for calling her a pet! She is amazing. She can keep Mark human and remind him how important it is for a hero to help people no matter what. She reminds him that she is a human. I love how she took a role when she notices that Nolan is very suspicious because she knows what her husband is capable of. The poor woman had to see her own son get beaten to the brink of death by her own husband after hearing said husband call compare her to a pet and realize that all their years married were a lie. Someone needs to give this woman a hug.

Now let's get into the New Guardians of the Globe. Let's start with Shrinking Ray, as there is not that much to say about her. I mean, I loved her introduction scene, but she didn't have that much screen time. I would like to see more of her; maybe she'll get more screen time in season two, perhaps she won't. I also want to see more from Dupli-Kate(I don't know if I spelled this correctly). The only scene that stands out to me is when she was involved with Rex, and that's not cool.

Now let's get into Rex Splode. He basically has Gambit-like powers but lacks the charm and charisma and is an overall douchebag. I really don't like him at all, and he is probably the weakest member. While his powers could be helpful but he is not the best person personality-wise.

Next is Monster Girl, and I love her. I really hope that she would get her curse lifted. Aside from Mark and Eve, her story is probably the most compelling and pretty horrifying. If I noticed that I was slowly de-aging, I would be freaking out as well. I hope that she stays away from Robot.

Now let's get into the other characters that aren't really a part of a team. Let's start with William, and he is fantastic that Mark doesn't deserve some time. I would have been angry at Mark for being so obsessed with Amber and not helping find his crush, who was transformed into a horrifying cyborg-like man. Then again, I am not William, and he is a good friend.

Now let's get to Amber, and I love Amber; she is a great character and is not a bad guy. Amber wanted to break up with Mark as he was a terrible boyfriend. Also, I am glad that she didn't take Mark back when he revealed his identity. I mean, if William was okay with knowing Mark's identity, Mark should have stepped back and maybe talk to Amber about his superhero life. I feel that Amber knew about his superhero life during the college visit, and she had it with all the lies. That's just my headcanon, but she is a pretty cool person. I even loved her interactions with Eve and how she inspired Eve to go out on her own. She is not a terrible person. She is a teenage girl who is frustrated with being treated by a guy who would not leave her alone when she tried to enforce boundaries.

Now let's get into Eve, my all-time favorite character who is probably the most powerful being on earth. I know that Mark and Eve would get into a relationship soon thanks to some spoilers while surfing the web, but I am looking forward to the slow burn. She is the best character in the show, and her powers are fantastic. She is just the best; that all there is to it.

Now let's get into the main character himself, Mark. Now I just want to say is that I do love Mark. I love me, a character with flaws. I feel like he was spreading himself too thin, he wanted to date Amber and be a hero, but he was a terrible boyfriend. Mark, I love you, but when someone says that she wished to space give her space. The relationship was unhealthy, and I really wanted Mark to stop and let her go because he had so much to deal with. This is what always frustrated me. I mean, Mark caused a good majority of the relationship problems. I love him, but he had to stop.

The rant aside, I do love Mark as a character and a lead character as well. While he appears to be strong, he is a character who does not understand the responsibility of being a superhero. He has a robust power set, but he has no idea how to use it or what he is getting into. He does have the best qualities when it comes to being a hero. He is kind, always wants to help people with their problems, and just wants to be a good hero. He is an excellent lead, and the poor boy really has gone through a lot in a short amount of time. Still, he does have a great story, and his reactions to what has happened to him are pretty human. I mean, I would be happy if I learn that I have superheroes and then be a mess when I know that my father was insane.

Overall I loved this show, and when is the second season coming? I am not good at exercising patience! All of the characters are great, and the animation, from my limited knowledge, is fantastic. The plot is fantastic and fast-paced, and I cannot wait to see more of the show.

#invincible spoilers #invincible tv series #mark grayson #atom eve #invincible animated series

[funkypoacher]

Today Was Wednesday?

sharing a WIP, tagging some people. Post ‘em if you got ‘em!

@fandomn00blr @ofgoodmen @iawv @juniper-tree @serial-chillr @damejudyhench @the-laridian @captastra @jumpship90 @seraphym100 @noire-pandora and @ljandersen. if anyone wants to be added to this list, say ‘add me’ in the comments. or pm me.

From the Illusion of my Being Self-Conscious, or Even Conscious, chapter 6.

”So. This was my Skadi 560 Skater.” Shepard leaned the omni-tool’s screen towards him as he sat at her right. The pic came from the catalogue, but was no less impressive for it. Beyond the price tag and simpering guarantees, the snowmobile’s track was deep, angry, and evidently starved to tear up the powder. “I ordered it while waiting for word on my trial date. My accounts weren’t frozen yet, and I figured why not spend it?” Sitting back, Shepard gave the image another fond look. “Went with a civilian company, though I didn’t kit it out like I could have. Figured I didn’t need the seat warmers.”

”That is art, Shepard,” Kaidan gushed. His reaching over, and tapping the screen to enlarge the image, had Shepard leaning in again. “225-K an hour? Like being shot out of a gun.”

The mental imagery, and the man’s mess of admiration, made Shepard smirk. ”I never had the pleasure, unfortunately. We ever get back to the Van… I mean, it should be waiting for me, Reapers and riots permitting.”

“I had a Bonhomme sitting at my parent’s place waiting for parts,” Kaidan mentioned, finally allowing her to take her arm away. His own crossed his chest, then propped him comfortably on the mess table beneath. With one brow skewed, he added, “it probably needs a bit more than that, now,” in a raspy, far-away thought, before adding, “hell, it’d take a miracle to still be in one piece.”

Although suggestions of his parents’ place dispensed with a very tangible, mental image of Ling and Phil Alenko, Shepard avoided the ifs, whens, and have-you-heards. Kaidan would have given her the straightest of updates, but she didn’t want to burn him out—not after what had happened within the last two hours, nor with the hundreds of looming messages from the press regarding said “situation”. The Normandy’s commander and XO were trying to take a brisk breather before fresh hell flamed amidst the general pandaemonium, so Shep’s trap snapped shut vis-a-vis his folks.

It might’ve been more, though, she mused—more than avoidance bred from sympathy. She didn’t want to have to look sorry, and she knew it. Rannoch had been a shit sitch. The Geth VI nearly tossed her off a cliff; Admiral Raan barely saved her. And then there was That Thing she’d have to deal with soon. Shepard was tired—she knew if pressed to express physical concern over Major Alenko’s parents, she might cry over all of it, which was not exactly the ambiance they were striving for in the mess-hall. So Shepard didn’t frown. She didn’t even flinch.

Kaidan looked her in the eye. If there was blame in his words, it came from the reality of her actions. “I get that you had the credits, Commander. But why spend it on a toy? Back in the day, I remember you putting a lot into war bonds. Did the Alliance burn you so bad? To make you stop?”

Shepard half choked, half laughed. “I—hm. Sometimes you’re too sharp for my own good, Major.” Smiling, she shook her head. “It wasn’t that, actually. It was… Things change.”

Shoulders slouching, the woman similarly slouched through her memories. Her time with Cerberus had been oily alleyways, weird battlefields, and filled with strangers. In a word, it had been exhilarating (though, to bust out the thesaurus, it’d been terrible, heart-breaking, and sad). “I mean, you are right, I know it’s surprising,” Shepard continued. “There’s no better job for an adrenaline junkie than the military, but for me it was a means to an end. It was all about the career; the glorious retirement, the uniform candy, all that. With Cerberus… The time-table was different, you know? We were working towards one, specific goal, which wasn’t really expected to have any follow-up, so I wasn’t planning my next professional step. I wasn’t devoting all of myself to the Alliance’s agenda. It was me—my own thing. I had to get it done, and be thorough about prep, but I had time for me, and I had time for my crew.” Having been looking off as she monologued like a solipsistic actor explaining their ‘process’, Shepard realized she felt confident enough to look Alenko right in the face as she spoke of her Cerberus stint. “I found out I liked the wet work as much as planning strategy, or ordering troupes from behind the lines. I liked it, it wasn’t just part of the job. From there, it became enjoying target practice. It was really getting into the terrain vehicles, because we didn’t have a Cortez. And when I was in lock-down, it just seemed like something I really wanted to try. Although it’s for snow, and that’s not something we saw a lot of in Winnipeg, but it seemed really fun.”

“Fun?” Kaidan repeated the word as though ensuring they were talking about the same thing. Shaking his head, smiling, the humour sloughed off, leaving a steeling of his gaze. Sitting back, he read her expression. “You really didn’t expect to come back from the Collector base?”

“You know how it is,” Shepard replied, shrugging. “Expectations waste time.”

#i have no idea what name to give kaidan's dad #phil is absolutely a place holder #maybe peter? #i think originally i had alexis but i can't remember #does anyone know if he has a canon name??

[zet-sway]

THE FROZEN SEA CHAPTER 2

I've literally never done a chapter 2 to anything before. It's boring but whatever, I wrote it. Hopefully I can find the stamina to continue. Longfic is so difficult (╥﹏╥)

Word Count: ~3000 Rated: "T" AO3 Link: "The Frozen Sea - Chapter 2" Pairing: Thane / FemShep Summary: "When they finally disembark, she beelines for the elevator with a painfully stiff spine and heavy footfalls. In that moment, Thane can see the weight of her two missing years more clearly than ever before, her humanity practically seeping through the cracks in her hardsuit."

- - - - - - - - - - -

It's shortly after breakfast when Shepard appears in his room unannounced. Fresh mug of coffee in one hand and datapad in the other, she takes the seat across from him without a word. Her eyes are glued to the screen, worried, but focused.

"Shepard, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

Her mug hits the table with a soft thump and her eyes flick up at him from under her lashes.

"What do you know about the collectors?"

Curious, he leans in, hands folded. "I've encountered them before, although not directly."

Shepard raises an eyebrow.

"My work has taken me to some less than desirable reaches of the galaxy," he says dryly.

"Ever killed one?"

By now he's unsurprised by her direct questions, but it's enough of a hint for him to understand there's definitely something afoot. Thane shakes his head. "No, I've only watched from afar. The Collectors have a reputation for black market dealings."

The datapad flickers off as she sets it down and takes a sip of her coffee. Then she summons an image of a planet he's never been to on her omni-tool. Horizon, a human colony.

"This morning I received an emergency directive from The Illusive Man. It's very likely we're about to go head to head with Collector forces for the first time."

Ah, that would be why she's here so early.

"How much longer until we arrive?"

"Sixty minutes. Tell me what you know."

He pauses to consider what might be most valuable to the mission. 

"They fly, like insects."

Shepard visibly chokes on her coffee. "That's different." She transfers the planetary data to his omni-tool. "Suit up and meet me us upstairs in thirty."

With that, she gets up and walks out.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

They load up into the shuttle. Shepard is nearly silent but Garrus seems to be in good spirits.

"So the Collectors can fly? Is that right?" the turian asks, checking the safety on his rifle for the 6th time.

Thane nods in his direction.

"I guess we're about to find out. We'll give em' hell, Commander."

Shepard merely hums her approval. Her mind is elsewhere.

When the shuttle touches down, she's the first one on the ground, motioning for the others to hold position inside the shuttle until she gives her signal. It's not until she's confident that Mordin's protection against the seeker swarms is effective that she allows them to press forward.

While she forges ahead to clear the proverbial brush for them, Thane wonders about the duality of her. Kalahira's messenger, making every attempt to prolong their lives. The goddess does not take life for the pleasure of it, she needs them for the battle ahead. 

He wonders if she, too, will be swept up in the coming tide. 

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Fighting the Collectors makes her skin crawl. 

The drone of seeker swarms and collector wings never seems to fade out from her mind. Their flesh is… wrong, somehow. Filled with fluids, too soft, with unseeing alien eyes. Garrus bolts one on her flank and its head bursts like overripe, rotting fruit. She cringes and presses forward, Thane by her side tearing down barriers. He’ll have biotic burns after this mission if she’s not careful.

They’re armed with particle weapons - unsurprising given their intel. The air singes in the wake of each shot as they move from cover to cover. The deeper they move into the colony, the more horrors they unearth.

By now, Shepard is accustomed to the knowledge that husks were once people. But two years gone has brought frightening new context to that idea when she sees what other horrors the Collectors have in their arsenal. Grotesque amalgams of... things. People. Other creatures. What is she even supposed to call this four legged thing with a mass of human heads below it's carapace? Is this what the Collectors are doing with these people?

They manage a small number of survivors. Too few. But among them is Ashley Williams - a fucking sight for sore eyes if Shepard’s ever seen one.

"Ash, it's good to see you," she says, face splitting into a grin. It takes all her self control to not throw her arms around the soldier. 

Ever the professional, Ashley stands resolute among her Alliance compatriots. She's grown into a strong soldier, and Shepard beams with no small amount of pride.

"I didn't want to believe it was you. It really is you, right? Shepard?"

"It's me, in the flesh." Shepard says, arms outstretched in a proud gesture.

Ashley looks incredulous, her expression is hard to read. "And you too, Garrus - what happened to your face?"

Garrus flares his mandibles in a characteristic turian smirk. "Just a scratch, really. A rocket to the face will do that."

"Jesus, Shepard..." The way Ashley's tone trails off immediately makes the air turn sour. Her smile twists away into nothing. "You're really with Cerberus, then?"

"It isn't what it looks like, Ash." The words are thick in her throat. Even if it's true, the phrase sounds utterly hollow.

"I thought you died. I… we… had a funeral for you. People don't just come back from the dead,” Ashley says, eyes like daggers.

"I didn't believe it myself until I saw the final report. You can read it if you like," Shepard’s face scrunches up in discomfort. The photos still haunt her. "Meat and tubes, Ash.”

"I'm disappointed you'd even let yourself believe that." Her voice is rising, eyes narrowed in accusation and contempt. The look on her face is every bit as painful as her words.

Shepard chews on her lip, trying to think of something to say, anything at all, because after everything they’d been through, Ashley is one of the last people she’d have expected....

“Cerberus,” she mutters. “Shepard, I trusted you.”

Shepard loses focus rapidly after that, her mind forcibly shrouding the words in a fog if only to get through the moment, second by agonizing second. Some days it's like she's been resurrected into a living nightmare. The sting of rejection after two lost years burns like her lungs in the vacuum of space. 

"I woke up on a Cerberus operating table," she interrupts, loudly. "They told me the station was under attack, so I grabbed my gear and got the fuck on with it. And then they told me I'd been dead for two years." She takes a step back, eyes flicking out across Horizon's dull gray sky. "I didn’t ask for this. For all I know, The Illusive Man put a fucking chip in my head set to blow the minute I disappoint him."

She can feel their eyes on her. Garrus looks lost, Thane is stone still and motionless. The heavy silence threatens to crush her heart into a hundred cybernetic pieces.

"I'm just as confused as you are. But I'm trying to stop this ," she gestures around at the disquieting emptiness of the colony, the grisly remains of slain Collectors. Her heart is racing, her head seething with the heat of indignation. She can taste the bitter words that sling past her teeth, regretting them the moment they hit the air.

"I wish you the best, Ash. If someone ever undeadifies your fucking corpse against your will, I’ll try not to hold it against you."

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

No one speaks as they board the shuttle back to the Normandy. Shepard's eyes are glued to the floor, her shoulders slacked in an uncharacteristic display of upset.

Thane and Garrus exchange glances but neither dare to break the silence.

When they finally disembark, she beelines for the elevator with a painfully stiff spine and heavy footfalls. In that moment, Thane can see the weight of her two missing years more clearly than ever before, her humanity practically seeping through the cracks in her hardsuit. Garrus looks just as worried. They part ways at deck three. Shepard's eyes are distant as the elevator doors snick closed.

When she doesn't appear for dinner, Thane tries - and fails - to knock loose the worry. It's certainly no business of his, and if she wanted his counsel she'd have sought him out by now. Still, he's compelled.

He fixes a fresh mug of coffee, and a mug of tea for himself, before boarding the elevator.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

He finds her sat on the couch, smushed into the corner with a datapad in her hand. Eyes ringed with fatigue, she looks so much smaller than she had on the battlefield. This close to the hull, her cabin is colder than the rest of the ship.

"You didn't show for dinner. I brought you some coffee. May I sit with you?"

She heaves an audible sigh, as though reluctant to accept. "Sure."

Maybe he’s invading her privacy, but there’s something about the way she looks that’s more vulnerable than he expected. Her hair is mussed and she’s wearing a black sweatshirt. The zipper is pulled low enough for him to see her dog tags glimmering against the bare skin in the valley of her chest. If she notices his wandering gaze, she doesn’t seem to care. She's tending to her own needs - without the requisite to prove a damn thing to anyone, least of all him. 

He seats himself in an adjoining chair and passes the mug to her. At least she seems to enjoy the warmth in her hands, bringing it close to her face to inhale the scent of it.

"About what happened on Horizon-" he begins.

She sits up to face him. "Thane, I know you mean well. But please don't concern yourself." 

He can see the pain etched into her features, though. It's hard to imagine, but if he looks close enough, she’s there. This unguarded human, the same woman who put the fear of god in him just days ago. He decides it’s better to respect her boundaries, and stands to depart.

"I understand, Commander. I’ll leave you be.”

“Wait,” she says, tiredly. Thane pauses, waiting on her next words. “Sorry, it’s just been… a long day.”

Slowly, he eases back into his seat to wait in silence while she gathers her thoughts. 

"Did you hear about Eden Prime, two years ago?"”

“Yes, a Prothean beacon was destroyed there,” he nods.

“Yeah. That’s where I met Ashley,” she sighs, leaning back against the cushions. “A lot of things happened on Eden Prime. Video feeds caught Sovereign just before touchdown. We lost Jenkiens within minutes of landing, and Nihlus not long after. The Geth were there, Saren was there. The beacon exploded and knocked me cold.” Life changed pretty fast after that.”

The way she recalls the memory is disorienting. He reminds himself that it probably is confusing for her - and she’s probably better off for it. Sometimes life without perfect recall sounds like a blessing.

Shepard takes a tentative sip from her coffee before continuing.

“Ashley was with me when we stopped Saren. She’s a great soldier, and a good friend. The things we saw together, the people we lost... I never expected her to be so cold.” Another sip, and she closes her eyes. “Shit hurts.”

“I see,” he says, two nearly meaningless words in the storm of his own memories. He thinks of Kolyat, so small all this years ago. Somewhere, he's now a man with accusations and hurts of his own.

Thane shifts in his seat, refocusing his attention on Shepard. “What changed?”

“Cerberus,” she frowns. “She’s angry, and she has every right to be."

"The way you spoke on Horizon gave me a different impression."

"You're right, and I regret what I said to her. But I..." Shepard chews on her lip. "I don't want to... talk down on other soldiers. But I'm not surprised she doesn't see this the way I do. We didn't see eye to eye when Kaidan died, either. There's a reason we aren't all special forces."

Kaidan, Jenkins, Nihlus - Thane hasn’t heard these names before, but he decides now isn’t the time to pry. Instead, he asks, "You believe her military rank cheapens her understanding of what happened?"

Shepard shakes her head. "Not her rank. Her training."

That piques his interest. Thane sets his elbows on his knees and leans in. "You're both Alliance, how was your training different?"

Shepard stares at the ceiling as if searching for the words. Idle fingers trace her dog tags against her chest, holding them out to him. 

"This symbol, N7," she begins. "It's from the interplanetary combatives training program. N is special forces, and 7 is the highest rank of training. The duties and privileges are different, but N7 is... kind of like the Spectres, in terms of a kind of exclusivity."

She lets the tags drop against her chest, and this time she zips her sweatshirt, like she wants to forget about them. 

"You had to be selected?"

"Yeah, for candidacy." She stares into her coffee and downs the rest of it before lacing her fingers behind her head, eyes fixed firmly on everything but him. "No one leaves ICT unchanged. I thought it would be like a fucked up version of boot camp. It kind of was, but that's not what made it so hard. We were thrust on to the front lines, thrown into impossible situations. There were people who…" she leans down on her elbows and sighs, restless. "People die during these promotions, Thane. People depend on you for their lives and you-” she laughs, sort of, "You depend on them not to be stupid.

"You don't feel proud of what you've done. You just... you change how you look at the world. Every wink of sleep, every moment of rest, whatever. It has to be earned. They give you a mission, and you can't go home until it's done. Sometimes you know you're sending good, honest soldiers against fatal odds. It's fucked - it really is, but you're the last line of defense for that mission. And it has to get done, or even more people could die. So you fight - dirty, if you have to - anything to complete the mission without losing more of your men. Sometimes that means…" Her mouth twists into a lopsided half-smile that doesn't reach her eyes. "...the enemy of your enemy is your friend.” 

The enemy of their enemy - Cerberus. The entire ship understands this, but Ashley had not. Polarizing moralities, indeed.

"By the time I was promoted,” Shepard continues, “I got why every N7 I've ever met never stays in one place for long."

"I think I understand,” he says quietly.

A moment of silence passes before she glances at him, curiously.

"Was training like that for you too?"

Thane shakes his head. "Not quite. It was intense for different reasons. But I never knew anything else. Our entire lives were training and discipline. I rarely socialized outside of our…" he pauses, thinking. "I think the closest word would be 'monastery.'"

"Monastery?" Shepard asks, finally meeting his eyes. "Was religion part of your training?"

"No, but the… asceticism of our lives bore resemblance to a monastery." He holds her inquisitive gaze with a smile. "I started going to services just to get away from my studies, but eventually I found comfort in them.” 

The memories are pleasant, actually. Stealing away from the others for prayer service was like a special privilege. 

She smiles. "That's kind of nice, I guess."

He recalls the scent of incense, the chanting, the faces of trusted mentors, and when he speaks there's a hint of nostalgia in his tone.

"The priest became like a father to me, in some ways. At least, I thought of him often when..."

The words almost slip his mouth, but he catches them, freezing them in his throat.

When Kolyat was born. 

Slammed with the realization that he hasn’t felt this glib with another person in years, he fidgets uncomfortabltly. It’s a disquieting change in how he’s used to conducting himself. 

"Another time, perhaps,” he says. If he's lucky, she won't bring it up again.

Shepard raises an eyebrow, but there's no judgement in her gaze. She wrings her hands where they hang between her knees. "I get it. Some things are too painful."

Painful isn't quite the word he would use, but it’s close enough. In truth, the guilt is what withholds him. Like the more time that passes without his son, the less he deserves the memory of him.

"Sorry for all this. Honestly I... It's been two years for everyone else, but a few months for me. Sometimes it can feel isolating.”

He offers a kind smile, standing and collecting her empty mug. “I can relate. Those of us forged under extreme circumstances seldom find others who understand us.” 

She smiles, and this time it reaches her eyes. "Thanks for thinking of me, Thane."

"You're quite welcome. I enjoy your company, Shepard," he says, his voice warm. "I'll let you rest."

"Likewise." She stands to see him out, bidding him goodbye with a grateful hand on his arm. She seems more like herself. "See you at PT."

He leaves, back to the silence of his makeshift quarters to mull over their conversation. The ghost of her handprint lingers on his arm until sleep claims him.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

This is the biggest fanfic yolo I've ever done. Send help writing is hard lol ┐(‘～`;)┌

#zet writes things #thane krios #thane #fshrios #shrios #the frozen sea au

[omnivorousshipper]

TGIF!! FRIDAY!! Can I have the Shaws admiring a physical trait of their partners. Deckard touching Luke's tattoos, Roman with Owen's scars, and Hattie with Ramsay's hair(? IDK?)

Thank you Omni! Love seeing what you create every Friday! ❤❤❤

I absolutely love this friend!! These six would be so lost in their partners, they could touch and stare at each other for hours!

And awww!! Thank you so much!! 😭😘💕💕💕

~~~

Shobbs

Sitting up in bed, Luke was scrolling through his work tablet and trying to focus on several reports

Which was extremely hard when Deckard was laying across his chest and tracing his tattoos with soft touches

Honestly, Luke loved the attention. He never wanted Deckard to stop touching him so softly or looking at him with fascination

But...

"Deck, if you don't stop, then we might just have to go for another round."

"Hmm. I don't see anything wrong with doing that." Deckard purred and batted his eyelashes

"I do." Luke huffed, gently grabbing Deckard's hand and stopping it from touching his tattoos even more. "I need to get some work done before tomorrow, Deck."

The smaller man pouted at him

"I was just admiring your tattoos."

"I know, but you're doing it in a distracting way." Luke told him softly. Leaning down, he kissed Deckard. "Touch with your eyes, princess, not your hands."

Deckard just kept pouting at him, but did as he asked

---

Rowen

It was around noon when Roman woke up with Owen firmly wrapped around him. It took quite some time, but he was finally able to escape his boyfriend's hold and leave the bed

Luckily, Owen kept sleeping on, sprawled across the sheets

Smiling down at him, Roman ordered food for them. It wasn't everyday he got to surprise Owen with breakfast in bed after all

Waiting for their food, Roman looked down at Owen and couldn't help but admire how beautiful he looked

His face was lax with sleep, peace finally smoothing out the tension he held in his body

Reaching over, Roman gently stroked Owen's cheek and felt the raised skin

Owen's scars could have been worse, even fatal, but the Brit had survived against the odds

Roman couldn't help but marvel at how strong Owen was. He didn't know anyone else who could do what Owen could

He knew Owen would stare into the mirror, a haunted look in his eyes as he examined his own scars. And some days, he completely avoided mirrors all together

Caressing the scars, Roman understood why Owen didn't like them, but he disagreed

Owen's scars didn't make him look ugly. Nothing could distract from Owen's beauty

No, Owen's scars were a part of him

And Roman loved everything about him

So lost in Owen, Roman didn't notice the time passing by until his phone chimed with the notification about their food

Standing, Roman bent over to leave a kiss on Owen's scarred cheek before leaving the room

---

Rattie

Sitting next to Ramsey, Hattie couldn't help but keep glancing over at her girlfriend

Ramsey looked absolutely stunning as she was leaned forward to stare intently at her laptop, her hands typing a mile a minute

The soft glow from the computer screen washed over her face and made her look even more ethereal

How could Hattie not stare?

She was meant to be doing her own things on her computer, but Hattie couldn't focus

Ignoring her own duties, Hattie propped her chin on her hand and watched Ramsey work

They must have been there for a while, but Hattie didn't care one bit

After a while, Ramsey finally pulled away from her computer. A triumphant smile spread across her lips

"I think I did it- Hatts? What are you doing?"

"Watching you."

"Why?"

"Because you're absolutely beautiful."

Ramsey stuttered in confusion

"But I wasn't even doing anything!" She yelped

"You were focusing on something you loved." Hattie said softly and leaned towards her. "You have no idea how breathtaking you are when you work."

"Why do I feel like you'll tell me?" Ramsey smiled back, and leaned in as well

"Don't think I won't." Hattie murmured

Cupping Ramsey's face, Hattie placed small kisses along her cheeks, on her chin, the corners of her eyes, anywhere she could

Ramsey couldn't help the small giggles that escaped her as Hattie showered her in love

~~~

I hope you enjoyed friend!!

#shobbs #rowen #rattie #deckard shaw #luke hobbs #owen shaw #hattie shaw #ramsey #roman pearce #hobbs and shaw #asks #omni answers #omni writes