#god their interactions in mother of exiles are just so good. it's so good it's so fun

[everythingwasalreadypicked]

So, uh supercalifragilisticexpialidocious everyone~

Alabaster rubbed his eyes and checked the status of his runes. He had 4, 5 if he was willing to take risks, hours before Lamia would caught up to him again.

He looked at the mattress on the floor of his temporary base. It looked...tempting. Maybe if he closed his eyes—

No. There was no time for naps. He needed to find a way to get rid of the monster on his trail. And another place to crash if-when Lamia would discover his current hiding place.

Research. Then back to the roads. He didn't have the luxury the simple mattress offered. He ignored the stinging of his eyes.

"You're never going to get anywhere with this."

He whipped around towards his mattress. And the figure sitting on it. The misty figure kept shifting like a kettle's steam. It's eyes; iris, pupil, sclera were all glowing green. Just looking at it hurt Alabaster's eyes.

He blinked a few times, trying to remember if there was someone here before, how it went past his runes; before panic hit him. It went past his runes.

He scrambled back, knocking down his chair in the process and assumed a combat position.

The figure sighed, furrowing it's brows in disappointment. "Were we always this paranoid?"

Alabaster tensed. "We?"

He watched in quiet horror as the figure had morphed to his look-alike.

"Yes, we. You're never going to get anywhere with this." It-he repeated. "You're drained."

Alabaster scowled at his doppelganger as he patted the spot next to him. "I'm not."

And yet, even as he said it he knew it wasn't true. He could barely keep his eyes open, or move his burning limbs. Last time he was running he had realised he had forgotten his spell book of all things, and had to go back which gave Lamia the opportunity to rake her claws across his back. They still hurt. And he had run out of both ambrosia and nectar, there was only so much he could do with mortal medicine.

"We are. And too proud to admit it." The doppelganger got up and strided purposefully toward him. Alabaster, instinctively took steps back until his back hit the wall. "But you don't have to lie to yourself, no matter how much I know we love to do it."

Alabaster breathed heavily as the thing pushed him against the wall. Gods, had it been this corporal before? Shivers went down his spine as he tenderly caressed his face. "You're not me." He choked out.

"But I am. Your darkest powers and deepest desires."

Alabaster blinked back tears as he held the wrist of the hand caressing his face. "What do you want?"

"We need to rest. I can help with that. And Lamia, too."

"How?"

"Let me take over."

"I can't," he swallowed, "I can't allow that."

The other looked at him with the care he hadn't seen in months, not since his exile, it made his heart ache. "No one you care about is alive, Alabaster. No one who cares about you."

'But me.' went unsaid.

"I'm tired." He admitted as he collapsed into the other's arms. Gods, did it feel good to be held again. There was nothing his mother could do in that aspect, not when the tyrants above the sky banned any physical interaction between them on top of his banishment, leaving them to only rely on dreams.

He felt number by seconds, as his brain started to feel stuffed with cotton and the joyful laughter of his siblings echoed around his mind.

"Then sleep, Alabaster. May you never wake again."

#supercalifragilisticexpialidocious #pjo #alabaster torrington #manipulation tw #possession #my writing #I was *not* expecting to write anything for this thing. But here we are ig #al is so so touch starved #my poor boy

[samsaintjames]

👀

So, you‘re getting actually two snippets, one from a Bering and Wells story, on which I haven‘t exactly been actively writing, but I must have reread it and fixed some typos because it shows up in my recently worked on tabs, so yeah. The second snippet will be from what I‘m actually actively working on.

This story itself is still untitled; the idea behind it is that the warehouse doesn‘t realize H.G. has been unbronzed by MacPherson for quite a while; and that he left her for a while to her own devices in Univille to get acclimated to the new world. And she just so happened to meet Myka (accidentally?) and they kinda… become friends.

And then kinda Time Will Tell happens and they go to London and that‘s when Myka realises, but doesn‘t say anything.

I assumed the same rough timeline as in the show, so the snippet happens after 2x7.

(I title my scenes always with what‘s kinda happening in them to have a better overview.)

caught red handed

“Let me get this straight. You’ve been in contact with H.G. Wells on numerous occasions after your run in with her in Tamalpais and you didn’t think to fill me in?” Myka winced at Artie’s tone; if she’d been a few years younger she would’ve probably burst into tears right away and even now she felt her eyes sting. She had never been good at handling it when scolded by superiors. “Well… we haven’t exactly been talking.” Myka could feel the blush creep to her face, her skin getting ridiculously hot. “So what else have you been doing then?” “Um…” Myka couldn’t remember the last time she felt that embarrassed in her life - and more or less living together with Pete that said something. She opened and closed her mouth repeatedly, but the words wouldn’t come; instead she could only feel herself blush even more. Pete was the first one to put one and one together. “Oh my god.” He looked weirdly proud at her. Claudia’s eyes widened in comprehension only a few seconds later. “Shit, you mean you were getting some from freaking H.G. Wells? How awesome is that!?”

Okay, and now for something completely different. It‘s a WoW AU with Jaina/Sylvanas endgame, that is titled „Rockstar AU“ at the moment and which I started writing october 2021, and which has quite a few words accumulated already.

The story is mostly Jaina centered and written from her perspective (though maybe once Sylvanas is there, I might throw in a few scenes from her perspective too, not sure yet).

The base story operates under the assumption that Jaina was kinda „exiled“ from Kul Tiras when she was 11 (though I might change the ages still) and after that grew up with Vereesa, Rhonin and Arator (who canonically must actually be around her age actually) in the floating city of mages - aka Dalaran. Oh yeah, in case it wasn‘t obvious the whole story is very AU, so some things from base lore obviously happened, but when they happened is different - most importantly, there never was a Scourge, Lich King or Forsaken; instead we have smartphones :D.

My plan is to show „now“ story parts, where Jaina and Sylvanas interact, interspersed with chapters that show Jaina growing up; my plan is to explain the present with the past, though I‘m not sure I‘ll pull it off.

And because I have sometimes only written small scenes and snippets for this story, you‘re getting several :D.

Dalaran, Jaina is 11

„What am I, the foster mother for Azeroths unwanted children?“ Arator grimaced, his ears moving downward at the sides of his head until they were almost drooping. Even Jaina could recognize the sadness of his expression. „She doesn‘t mean it like that.“ He whispered to Jaina, though he kept his eyes fixed on the ground instead of looking at her again and Jaina thought he had maybe said that more for his benefit than hers. They could not hear Rhonins reply to Vereesa, but whatever he said must have calmed her down so that her voice dropped as well, because the rest of their discussion did not carry outside to where Jaina and Arator stood.

This second snippet is last years rewrite of the beginning of the introduction scene from last year:

intro version 07.01.

„No.“ The temptation to just shove the missive with her orders and the accompanying information folder back into Anduin’s hands and close the door in his face is so strong, Jaina has to clench her jaw to fight the compulsion and push down the accompanying emotion of indignation and anger that threatens to escape the strong control she now needs to exert over herself at all times. Reacting on her anger, the possible danger of it aside, the scars starting on her hands and growing up her arms almost to her shoulders on both arms tingle as her temper flares, would not only be thoroughly unfair to her nephew, who, while obviously already knowing the contents, is nothing more than a glorified messenger at the moment, but also accomplish nothing. Shooting the messenger would not solve anything however satisfying it might be in the heat of the moment; but while Jaina might be considered temperamental - though elven standards differ slightly from human ones, and the dragons considered her laughably mellow - she has never been rash in her actions. Damn Khadgar, who knew her well enough to know that a) she would not like the orders he sent her and b) that despite that she would not explode directly into Anduins face, Anduin who is looking at her like a kicked puppy at her rejection because he obviously thought this - the orders he just delivered to her - was a good idea. „Jaina, this…“ She cuts him off, unwilling to hear what no doubt is a reassurance that she will be well and this assignment the perfect opportunity, even though the rudeness of her behaviour makes her uncomfortable. „No.“ Jaina shakes her head. „I will not spent the next year babysitting a rockstar to protect her from her apparently insane star allures, while Grommash Hellscream still runs free.“ There is more to it however that she does not voice, partly because it is none of Anduin’s business, but mostly because Jaina herself is still very much reeling from what she has already learned by only skimming over all that is included in the background information folder. Confusion, surprise and a near overwhelming sense of betrayal, as unfounded as it may be, make it impossible to articulate what is going through her head. Jaina has lived with Vereesa Windrunner since she was 11 and been called daughter by her during her youth; Vereesa‘s now 11 year old sons call her aunt (just like Anduin); Arator, Aleeria Windrunners son once punched the prince of Lordaeron and knocked him out cold because nobody was talking about his sister like that when she was 17; she has spent almost a year at Windrunner spire under Lireesa Windrunners care during the Legion invasion of the Broken Isles when she was 16; Lirath Windrunner has unsuccessfully tried to teach her to play the elven flute for years and been her date to several official banquets she had not managed to talk herself out of despite the only thing between them being a slight sense of sibling rivalry. She is so integrated into the Windrunner family that she has been a Proudmoore only in name for years; at least that‘s what she had thought until this very moment. Yet none of them, not even in passing, have ever mentioned that Vereesa and Alleria have a middle sister called Sylvanas.

#Bering and Wells #Sylvaina #my fanfics

[minty-mumbles]

Here There Be Monsters: Twilight

Werewolf Lore | Read on AO3

~~~

Twilight Aegaeon Giles

Species: Werewolf

Physical/Mental Age: Mid Twenties

Actual Age: ~80

Gender/Pronouns: Cis Male (He/Him)

Sexuality: Bisexual

Physical Appearance Notes: He does have the markings on his forehead. The marks are symbols of his devotion to the Moon god, or at least they’re supposed to be. The marks were put there by his parents, illegally, when he was a baby. 

Family/Friends:

Dusk: Twilight’s older sister, who wasn’t taken by their parents when they were forced out of Twilight’s birth pack. Twilight doesn’t know that Dusk exists, and Dusk assumes that Twilight is either dead or still with their parents, but she hopes he’s out there somewhere.

Midna: Princesses of Twili, a kingdom to the northwest of Hyrule. Twilight was friends with her, and had a crush on her, but when she revealed she as the princess right before he left her country, he felt betrayed.

Shad: Cute guy who comes into the bar Twilight works at a lot. Something’s not quite right about him and his friends though. Probably a bit too smart for his own good.

Uli/Rustl/Colin/Other Assorted Ordon Villagers: A nearby Pack that Time nudged Twilight into discovering/interacting with. The Pack is too far away for Twilight to visit every full moon, but close enough that he can have some support. 

Schooling: He didn't have a great education growing up, and dropped out of high school when he was about 16. So hasn’t gone to college. He's currently working on getting his GED online. Time offered to give him the money for it, and he’s seriously considering going for the experience. He doesn’t know what he would major in though, and he’s very hesitant to rely on Time that much.

Job: Currently in the workforce. He works at Telma’s Tavern, part time as a starbucks barista, and as farmhand at Lon Lon Ranch on the weekends.

Residency: Rents an apartment with Wild. The pair have been invited to move in with Time, but they are hesitant to do so. 

Other:

Twilight doesn’t trust gods, and has trust issues/issues with authority. He is very hesitant to pray to Time, only doing it in bad situations, such as in Caged Animals. He’s not religious at all.

He only speaks Hylian fluently. He’s semi-fluent in Twilit, but very rusty.

He really likes kids, and has a soft spot for them. Wants to have his own someday. For now he’s satisfied with wrangling Wild.

Summary of Past: 

When Twilight was a baby, his parents gave him the marks of the moon god. This practice was seen as archaic and outlawed in Twilight’s birth pack, so his parents were exiled. The pack planned to keep their two children, but Twilight's mother came back and stole him. His sister, Dusk, was left behind. 

He lived in the slums of Castle town with his parents. They weren’t horrible parents, but they weren’t good either. They were a bit neglectful and not very good at showing him they loved him, but they provided for Twilight decently well. His father had a bad habit of harassing the local werewolf pack in the area, who had denied them pack membership. Eventually, his father was tried by the Vampire council for this and was sentenced to a few years in jail for harassment and destruction of property. He never came back, and Twilight doesn't know what happened to him. His mother died of sickness one winter when Twilight was the equivalent of 16 years old.

After his mother died, Twilight wanted to get away from Castle Town. He moved to the capital city of Twilit, a kingdom just to the northwest of Hyrule. He was only there for a few years, and he met and befriended a local Twili named Midna. He didn’t know she was a princess for most of their friendship, as she disguised herself when she left the castle to get away from her duties. After a few years, he decided he was going to leave Twilit to go back to Hyrule. He was tentatively interested in looking for his birth pack, and it was pretty hard to find a job in Twilit. It was only at the last moment that Midna revealed her true identity to him.

The two of them had budding romantic feelings for each other, but when Midna told Twilight her true identity, it left him feeling betrayed, and like even if he returned, he wouldn’t be able to reconnect with her. He was left wondering how much of her persona was real and how much was just an act, leaving him to also question his romantic feelings.

Shortly after he returned, Twilight stumbled across a lone poltergeist, WIld. He was wreaking havoc on the Hylians who couldn’t see him. Twilight knew that the poltergeist likely didn’t have any memories of their previous life, and if they continued to do this to get the chaos energy they needed, they would be dealt with by the local vampire council, or maybe a nearby Demon. He took the Poltergeist under his wing, and started helping them find better, less destructive ways of creating chaos, and tried to help them recover their memories. They became very close quickly, although Twilight wasn’t successful in helping him with his memories

He got a job at Telma’s Tavern, working full-time as a server. The place isn’t the most upscale, but it pays well. There’s a group of regulars at the bar that come in and meet a few times a week. They seem to be work colleagues, but seem very hush-hush about what their job is. Twilight thinks that one of them, Shad, is pretty cute, but he’s hesitant to get invested in someone after Minda. Also, he knows he couldn’t be with a non-magical. Some magical creatures are okay with hiding their magic from their partners, or telling them illegally, but Twilight isn’t. (It made him feel a bit better about realizing this, as he figured he’d never be able to be in a relationship with Midna anyways, as she wasn’t magical.) 

It’s about this time that Twilight meets Time. The god sees these homeless magical kids and is immediately invested in them. Twilight is very wary of him at first. He doesn’t want to rely on a stranger's help, and doesn't want to be in Time’s debt. He knew Time was a powerful magical being from the start, but didn't know exactly what he was. Once he figures out that Time's a god, he’s even more wary. Twilight has an aversion to any sort of religious stuff, because of the trauma of being pledged into a god’s service without his consent, and feeling abandoned by said god. It takes a long while for Twilight to warm up to Time, and really it’s Wild who makes that first step. 

Twilight eventually gets another job as a Starbucks barista, and starts working at Malon’s farm on the weekends. That extra money, along with the money Wild is starting to get from his youtube channel allows them to get an apartment. Twilight starts slowly meeting the other people Time’s essentially adopted. 

He slowly grows to see this eclectic group as his pack.

#here there be monsters #linked universe #lu twilight #werewolves

[sunlightsshadow]

Heal What Has Been Hurt Liveblog

hello and welcome to the first of 5 initial (but probably not Only) posts recounting my liveblogging of Heal What Has Been Hurt by @sunlitmcgee

ch1: and the universe said "I Love You"

c! tech did one (1) good thing and it was burning the egg

gogy mention/pos

its only ch1 and they've already gone DadMode. hasnt even even , talked to the boy yet/lh

XD :D

ch2:Flower Gleam and Glow

"weirdo mother hen guardian angel nanny thing." hehehe

moths moths moths moths moths

Clara :D

ch3: I've Been Ghosting Your Dreams

i wonder how tommy feels about warm rain

my browser crashed god dad is too powerful/j

ghostbur :DDD

oh i have so many feelings about ghobur

ch4:Come, My Child

not lots of thoughts just enjoying the domesticity of the bois

did enjoy the star freckles tho

ch5:Like A Busy Bee Taking Flight

"large purple man" thanos/neg

compass compass compass compass (im wearing my Your Tommy compass my bf bought me <3)

heheh dad said pogchamp

ch6:Flying Like a Bee, Black and Yellow Energy

hehe derivikat lyrics

xd dad god. why is that form even still in your rotation/lh

ranboo/pos. i love all Ranboos

hehehe time to sin!

c! techno/neg

xd having several children who are gods and can take care of themselves and having to focus your attention on the whole of creation is different than abandoning your litteral tiny children to go adventuring w a gladiator who hears voices

xd you could have shifted forms dont yell at them/lh

ch7:Cold. Why You Gotta Treat Me So Cold?

weird schlatt tubbo/neg nightmare tubbo/neg

GOD I hate exile

I am so emotional over them GODS

I need someone to be proud of me like xd is proud of tommy

I want a god dad. the yearning is strong

ch8: sweet like honey

any time someone writes tommy saying the phrase "ill be good" istg i feel my heart break

back sore, clue #1

micha 🥺

ch9: I Think You're All Insane

_beloved family/pos

PUFFY!!

every time i manage to forget the captain is dreams mom someone reminds me :/(/hj/nm/lh)

no more memory broke :D

am i using that emoji to much? i do not care<3

god enderman lore/pos

ch10: Deep In The Meadow

i also feel Okay. this is a good place to be

there is something so personal about tommy wanting to end the cycle of abuse and worrying he'll end up like the people who hurt him

good people have intrusive thoughts tommy:(

ch11:Here it's Safe, and Here it's Warm

hehehehe Wings also toms XD would never leave you :(

"you'll instinctively know" its not instincts if it hurts Philza

god i fucking love the personification of instincts. so much. its such a cool thing

ch12:Why, Tell Me, Father?

tommy has a perfect comfy bed and doesnt wanna move. mood

tommy is starting to heal and i love that for him/gen

how DID xd figure that out?

ive just decided just now while rereading that xd was too nice to phil

"you're still here" im gonna SOB

heal! emerald duo/neg

I wanna hug tommy :(

ch13:It's a Promise for Life Between Father and Child

what if i just [takes a white out pen to tommys trauma] look now hes just a lil guy! (someone do this to me)

[beats the doomsday bitches over the head with a stick] i will actually never be normal abt c!tommy

mmmm i should play omori

tinyboo. itty bitty

i dont wana read the interaction w technoooo [reads it anyways] its important

Ghobur! he back!

i think more people should let ghostbur get angry

ch14:How Would You Know?

idk how phil cant sense the Pissed Off aura xd must be giving off rn

in which xd is my spirit animal

:D(malicious)-XD

i like his hat :(

somebody please do this w my dad

ch15: Remember to be Patient

i am obsessed w instinct stuff. lil baby birb go peep peep

i was so lost in the euphoria of birb i forgot to have thoughts

ch16:Fold Up Your Wings, Close Your Eyes

WING TIME WING TIME WING TIME

"it's beautiful… except of course for the unholy screams"

xd " claws" and " adorable" are not generally words that go together

he is SAD the baby is SAD :(

what would xd do if tommy turned into an actual baby?

"its me?" AWWWW🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

hes a baby

i will kill any god for him

baby boy

precious

oh boo even *mentions* agere how did I miss that the first time? tommy is simply baby

ch17: See the Sunset

cant see glass<3

i want a cool space blanket (I have a non-binary flag space blanket tho :3)

I also like when things make click clack noises… am i birb?

I love hiiiiimmmmm

ch18:Nothing Could Tear Us Apart

they can both be clingy it's okay

i almost forgot to open my document when I started reading again

[wilbur voice] quackityyyyy

hes not even actually here but I'm lobe himb

hehehe lovey dovey qpps/pos

i adore my qpps and my bf

GOD i am not NORMAL about platonic soulmate clingyduo there is nothing normal abt my mind state towards them!

"You were worth more than L'manburg ever was…" grrrrrr growl hiss its so GOOD

more baby birb🥺

ch19:Come out and Play

is he a demigod now?

bird time again!

i love instinct shit have i mentioned that?/hj

baby baby boy/pos

i was reading this the first time and I was just like. hes so small

i fuckin love my comfort chara using my coping mechanisms

And with that it's back to reading<3

#cass speaks #dsmp #heal what has been hurt #c!benchtrio

[shivasdarknight]

okay this got me curious now but do you think your wol’s parents would approve of your wol’s love interest(s)?

Short answer: it’s complicated.

Long answer:

Parents is a charged word for Surkukteni because there are her bio parents, then there’s her bio-mother and her mother’s wife, and then there’s the man she actually considers family, and oh my god.  I’ll just go over each person on their own.

Easiest is her bio-father because she does not know him.  She’s never met him, and it frankly may stay that way.  Kousuke Osada, an exile of Sui no Sato who’s now with the Malaguld, is a right and proper asshole.  Would he approve?  Maybe of Estinien, but very likely not but who fucking cares.  He’s very likely to be a homophobe and a transphobe, so let’s just move on.

Odtsetseg is Surkukteni’s bio-mother, and mother to Altan and Emegen (the two baby half sisters).  And she would not approve.  Partly because once she found out that Surkukteni was alive (after she’d run away 15+ years ago from the Steppe altogether), she became insistent on her coming back.  When this bitch was the reason Surkukteni left in the first place!  She’s a helicopter parent who belittles Surkukteni and doesn’t take her seriously.  She does not respect her accomplishments, she does not respect her agency, and does not respect her autonomy.  Estinien and Aymeric are absolutely not approved of, as Odtsetseg is a member of the Borlaaq tribe.  No men allowed, and they’re just keeping her from the tribe regardless.  Ysayle is...fine.  But why bother getting with a woman so clearly connected to Eorzea and not with the tribe?  Why get with two women - Ysayle and Venat - who are so spurred by wanderlust?  She doesn’t approve of it.  Bonus points for it being bad: she’s still insistent about this even after Endwalker, and Surkukteni has a son at that point - a son (Toskr) she’d have to abandon and her mother is asking her to abandon so that she, her two daughters (Allie and Yukiko), and maybe Ysayle can go to the Borlaaq tribe.  This is part of why Surkukteni didn’t want her mother knowing about her kids as she knew that she’d be asked to abandon at least one of them (later two, as she and Ysayle have another son, Tseren).

Ulan is Odtsetseg’s wife - the step-mother to Altan (and Surkukteni technically, Katsuro is...a weird situation as a castoff son of the Borlaaq), and sire of Emegen.  She’s a very strict woman who Surkukteni meets long after she’d run off.  Ulan mostly goes with Odtsetseg’s wishes and so she is very skeptical of Surkukteni’s choice in partners.  However, Ulan is one of the Xaelic Warriors that show up for the Ilsabard Contingency, bringing many of the Borlaaq’s own soldiers with her.  And it’s there that she actually sees Surkukteni in her element with her then-fiances (namely Estinien and Ysayle, but she also sees how the three interact with Aymeric).  And it’s very clear that Surkukteni’s element is as a Warrior of Light and with these people.  So while she can’t openly say she approves of it, she’s not going to be belligerent as there’s no point in trying to sway the mind of someone who’s already made it up.  They’re not on good terms by any means, but it’s at least a mutual respect of “mind your damn business.”

If it wasn’t clear by the other three, Kitase is the only one Surkukteni considers family.  He may be her old captain, but he might as well be her father at this point.  While he is a bit frustrated that she completely ignored his warnings about not meddling in Ishgard for her own safety, it’s still extremely funny to him that she came back (initially) with the damn Lord Speaker, an Azure Dragoon, and the Leader of the Heretics.  She had to go and just collect some of the most politically influential people to be with, huh?  He’s met with all of them to get a sense of who they are as individuals because he is genuinely worried about Surkukteni going through a repeat of what happened with her abusive ex, Misaki.  He met Estinien first - before DRG70, so he had no idea they knew each other - and figured he was fine, but then quickly figured out that Estinien liked Surkukteni which led to the prying and trying to see who he was and if he was a good fit (he met Kitase’s approval).  During 5.4, he meets Ysayle and picks at her to tease her, but she meets his approval.  Aymeric, he’s very outwardly exasperated by - “THE LEADER O’ THE NATION I TOLD YE T’ STAY FAR AWAY FROM?” - but he does think he’s a good guy deep down.  And Venat is about the only one he immediately and outwardly likes, though he will not let Surkukteni live down the fact that all 4 of her partners have blue eyes, and 3/4 have white hair.

So safe to say, Kitase is the only one that gets to meet her kids and she remains in contact with him.  That’s her dad, and she’s absolutely inviting him to the inevitable wedding that Aymeric wants to go through with (even though most of them are fine with leaving it at fiances lmfao).

#original #answered wol questions #surkukteni #surkie #wol #ff #ffxiv #final fantasy #final fantasy xiv

[baltears]

lane change i stan og charlotte now

#i used to find her boring and one note as a villain but now i think she is fun 😌 #and i think it's cool how halores is an evolution of both charlotte and dolores and has such a funky little identity crisis thing happening #very looking forward to seeing more of that #anyway i think i just. idk i love how she vibes with william i think it's funny that they're so similar in a lot of ways #(sickeningly wealthy and appear to have everything but their personal lives are utter trashfires that they failed at entirely) #(also their ambition and ruthlessness which is hollow at the core <3 in williams case a trauma response but charlotte is just like that) #i love the little hints of their dynamic we get sprinkled in the story here and there. they basically get along #and have something akin to respect for each other but also they're too similar to really fw each other and have no loyalty whatsoever #e.g. william immediately picking up on the fact that charlotte might be the mole the literal second it came up in conversation #and even just like. the fact that he basically handed control of the company over to her bc he didn't really give enough of a shit just then #i just think it's fun! it's a fun dynamic #and like obviously i prefer the dynamic of willores and i really hope that the way they interact in s4 speaks more to that relationship #but even if they take a hard left on halores and make her try really hard to just be charlotte the dynamic will still be really fun #god their interactions in mother of exiles are just so good. it's so good it's so fun #so incredibly entertaining both to see the shades of the authentic dynamic that used to exist between william and the real charlotte #and to also see halores having to mask both her identity as the mole (bc charlotte was) and her identity as herself (dolores) #in front of the person who arguably knows her best out of anyone. and then when she succeeds to get to smugly reveal it to his face #just. chefs kiss #idk what these tags are anymore but ANYWAY #i love this show <3 #westworld

[letsfluxshitup]

bonding b-over broken bones (ao3!)

(tw: a lil angst and a minor injury <3)

“I want to resurrect Schlatt.” Quackity blurted out, hands fisted in the blanket he’d wrapped around him.

“Ok.” Techno’s eyes didn’t lift from the thick book he was reading from, settled in a rocking chair in front of the fire.

“Ok? That’s it? You’re not going to stop me?” Quackity snapped, shrugging the blanket off of him. 

“Am I… supposed to?” Techno sighed, flipping another page in his book. He shifted slightly, shooting a look at Quackity over the top of his book, looking unimpressed.

“I want to resurrect a dictator, of course you’re supposed to stop me!” Quackity stood quickly, crossing the room in an instant and jabbing a finger into Techno’s chest. Techno batted his hand away like it was nothing, completely unbothered.

“Ok. Quackity… Don’t resurrect Schlatt. That’s… a horrible idea.” He drawled, already looking over the conversation. “You know if you wanted to roleplay you should’ve just said so—”

“I’m not fucking around, Technoblade!” Quackity’s wings puffed up from where they’d been settled against his back, desperate to look intimidating, to get Technoblade to take him seriously. “This isn’t a fucking joke! Don’t demean me, I’m gonna do it!”

Techno paused, head tilted to the side with a considerate look across his face, expression oddly soft in the firelight. Quackity decided then that he hated that look. He didn’t want to be pitied. He wanted to be taken seriously, wanted Techno to make him stop his self-destructive mission, for Techno to act like he wanted him around.

“Why do I feel like we’re talking about more than resurrecting Schlatt here?” Techno broke the silence finally, apparently finding what he was looking for in Quackity’s expression. “I’ll be blunt, Quackity. I’m a bit tired, of all the mind games, of all the political intrigue. If you want something from me you’re just going to have to say it.”

Quackity huffed, Techno didn’t fucking get it, and that was fine, it didn’t bother him. He wished Techno would just do things, instead of making Quackity choose. A small part of him missed that about Schlatt, about how he was just told what to do. Even with the others, he went along with what was said. Techno didn’t allow that, though, and he hated that.

“Why? Why do I have to say anything?” Quackity lashed out again, shoving at Techno’s shoulder. The rocking chair moved with the shove, but Techno remained stony, face impassive and blank. “I want to resurrect Schlatt. That’s obviously a horrible idea! Why won’t you stop me?” 

There was a long beat of silence as the rocking chair swayed back and forth, finally settling again before Techno spoke. 

“It’s your choice, Quackity. You can do what you want. I’m not going to tell you what to do, because I don’t want to. If you wanted guidance, or a helping hand, maybe I can help you with that.” Techno stood then, grabbing Quackity by the shoulders and leaning close. “But, I am not your boss. I don’t care what you do.”

Quackity felt his heart in his throat, staring into Techno’s eyes, the man looking more serious then he’d ever seen him before. Defensive, Quackity lashed out, arms flailing wildly as he stumbled backwards.

“FUCK you, I didn’t want you to care about what I do anyways, you ass-” He cut himself off with a shriek as he stumbled over the carpet, crashing down the stairs and landing at the bottom in a tangle of limbs and wings. 

He blinked and Techno was at his side, and he would’ve been impressed by the graceful landing considering Techno had just jumped from the second floor, but he was distracted by a horrible pain in his ankle.

There was a flurry of movement after that, Techno ordering him to stop squirming as he scooped him up before bridal carrying him up the stairs.

--

Techno carefully laid him out on his bed, and moved to look over his ankle. He was frowning and Quackity couldn’t help the squeak he made when Techno lightly touched it.

It was a fucked up way to ask for attention, Quackity knew, and he shouldn’t be so offended that Techno didn’t rise to the bait, but it was like he didn’t even consider it. And that hurt. 

“Well, Quackity, I think it’s twisted.” Techno said finally, deadpan voice cut with the slightest hint of concern. “Looks like you’ll be stuck here for a while.”

“Just call someone to come get me, I can still ride a horse.” Quackity huffed, arms crossed as he glared at Techno. He was still pissed, alright? It still smarted a little that Techno, apparently, didn’t care about him enough to stop him from hurting himself and others.

He huffed again, and stuck his tongue out at Techno when he shot him a questioning look.

“Unfortunately for you, a blizzard’s coming in. Even if someone could get here before it arrives, there’s no way you could make it back safely.” Techno moved to stoke the fire more, settling another log on the pile. 

“For…?” He prompted after a long lapse of silence, both of them just staring at each other, Quackity irritated and Techno puzzled.

“Whatever,” Quackity mumbled, fiddling with the edge of the blanket Techno had carefully draped over him. “You should apologize, you know.”

Techno blinked at him, looking genuinely confused.

“Whatever!” Quackity snapped, “Never mind, it’s whatever.” 

“Ok.” Techno responded simply, standing up from his squat next to the fireplace and stretching. He looked like he was going to say something before he was interrupted by a door opening downstairs.

“Techno?” Philza called into the empty bottom floor, stomping the snow off of his boots as he came into the house. He shook the snow from his wings as he stripped off his outer layers, meeting Techno’s eyes over the railing of the stairs.

“Hallo. Quackity’s here.” Techno said, making his way down the stairs to meet Philza at the door. 

“Oh? Quackity?” Philza paused, before whispering, “The loud one with the messy wings?”

At Techno’s affirmative nod, he beamed. 

“Such a good young man. Very… Nonthreatening.” Philza smiled at him. “Good friend material.”

Techno squinted at him.

“I’m not a child,” Techno huffed. “I don’t need you to approve of all of my friends.”

Philza just snorted, deciding not to call him out on how he practically preened when Philza voiced his approval.

--

Philza carefully stroked down the feathers on Quackity’s wings, loose feathers drifting slowly to the ground. Quackity was sat on a chair with a low back, crafted specifically with the winged hybrids in mind. His ankle was propped on another chair across from him, an ice pack on his ankle. 

Techno had been aggressively doting over him, adjusting his pillows and helping him drape the red cape Quackity had bullied him into handing over. Philza had gently sent him away, asking him to make them something to eat while he helped Quackity with his wings, amusement over the mother-henning palpable.

Philza didn’t miss the pout on his son’s face when he mentioned grooming Quackity’s wings, and barely managed to hold back a snort when he caught Techno shooting him a jealous look from the kitchen. 

The clanking of pans and dishes hitting together and the sounds of cupboards open and closing filled the background. 

Quackity cleared his throat, uncomfortable before falling silent again. 

Philza continued to groom his wings, silently amused by the squirming the uncomfortable silence caused. Quackity’s shoulders relaxed a miniscule amount and Philza pounced.

“Do you even know how to groom your wings?” Philza said abruptly, startling Quackity into a more rigid sitting position. The sudden movement earned a squeak as he jostled his injured ankle. Techno appeared at the doorway, a concerned look on his face, blue frilly apron on and dirty spoon in hand. 

Thank God, Quackity thought to himself, please help this is so fucking awkward. 

Philza just sent him his most disarming smile, earning him a suspicious squint, he’d taught him well, but Techno disappeared into the kitchen again without comment. 

I’m fucked, Quackity thought, cursing his lack of telepathy as his one hope of salvaging this interaction walked away.

Has it been too long now? Quackity wondered, does he still expect a response?

The silence stretched on for far too fucking long, Quackity shifting slightly in his chair as he tried to think of a way to save the situation. He glanced into the mirror hanging on the wall, Philza looking as peaceful and impassive as he had when they started. He nervously twisted a corner of the cape in his lap, and fuck Techno for leaving me alone with his dad you never leave your friends alone with your dad why would he do this to me, motherfuck-

“Quackity?” Philza chirped, sounding amused, “You alright in there?”

“Fine!” Quackity squeaked, cursing his high pitch and nervousness before clearing his throat and trying again. “I’m just fine, how are you, uh-, big man?”

Quackity flinched. Big man? Seriously?

“I’m alright. Joined this server, killed my son, my other son got exiled by my other other son’s government. Same old, same old.” Philza kept the same tone throughout, light and airy and Quackity winced. He hadn’t thought that through, fuck. 

“No hard feelings, right?” Quackity joked nervously.

“Should there be?” Philza said, suddenly dead serious as he made eye contact with Quackity through the mirror across from them. And, oh, yeah Quackity could see why Philza had the reputation he did and how did he keep getting himself into these situations, god fucking-

Philza snorted, patting him on the shoulder before standing and stretching.

“I’m just fucking with ya, mate, don’t worry about it. No hard feelings.” Philza smiled, but there was something a little too feral to it, too sharp to be completely friendly, and Quackity saw where Techno got it from. 

--

“I just— I hate all of this, L’Manburg, Manburg— after all of that started things started going to shit.”

Techno paused in his knitting, carefully set it down as he turned to look towards Quackity. Quackity was staring pensively into the fire, leaning heavily on one elbow as he studied the flames. 

Philza had disappeared down the staircase moments before, despite Techno’s silent pleading with him to stay, only giving Techno a smug look over Quackity’s head, and a promise to return with hot chocolate.

After it looked like he wasn’t going to continue, Techno picked up his knitting again.

“It’s just—” Quackity started, and Techno sighed, “everything sucks now! Everyone’s all up in arms about everything, and everything is all about ‘intercountry relations‘ and it’s dumb and I hate it and it sucks. Governments suck, Techno.”

Techno inhaled. Exhaled. He slowly set down his knitting, lest any sudden movements scare away Quackity’s one moment of clarity. They were few and far between, you really had to capitalize on what you got when you got it. They were very close to a revelation here, and Techno had to act carefully. 

When Techno turned to look at him Quackity was staring at him, expression open and vulnerable. 

“Be careful, Ducky, you’re starting to sound like me.” He deadpanned, finally breaking the silence between them.

It was almost funny how quickly Quackity’s face crumpled, cycling between affronted, bamboozled, then contemplative. The old ABCs of realizing you’re an anarchist,Techno thought, happens every time.

Quackity blinked twice, quickly, before shaking his head.

“Y’know what— actually, nevermind. I don’t— We can worry about government another day, alright, asshole?” There was no bite to his tone this time, still looking deep in thought. He huffed before shifting in his seat uncomfortably, looking into the fire again. 

“I think… We should talk. About our feelings.” Quackity’s speech was stilted, looking wildly uncomfortable and like he wanted to be literally anywhere else. Techno felt the same way.

“Ok.” Techno said finally, looking down at his knitting project again. “You can start.”

Quackity huffed, looking offended, before anxiously rubbing his hands across his thighs. Why did this have to be so awkward? 

“I’m a licensed therapist, you know—” Quackity started, hands waving as if gesturing authoritatively would give him more credit.

“You’re not.”

Quackity flipped him off.

“Ok, you got me— I’m not, but I think we could work with some I feel statements.” He spoke semi confidently, desperate to put on a front, but his wings’ anxious shifting gave him away. “I feel upset, because of what you said earlier. Or, I guess— what you didn’t say?”

“I feel confused, because I don’t know what I didn’t say that upset you.” Techno said, stuttering slightly over the sentence. A glance at Quackity proved that he was just as confused, and Quackity huffed, frustrated. 

Quackity flipped him off again before starting over.

“Ok, I see how that could be confusing. But, you—” He didn’t get to finish as Techno cut him off.

“I thought we were doing I feel statements. You can’t just ignore your own rules, you’re the one who set them.”

“Ok- fine- I feel hurt, that you didn’t do anything when I said I was going to resurrect Schlatt.” At the blank look he received he continued, voice noticeably shakier. “I feel like you don’t care, because if you did care, you’d make me stop. Or tell me not to, I guess.”

Quackity finished lamely, hands dropping back into his lap as he glared at the fire. 

“Oh.” Techno said finally, nervously tapping on the table. “I can see how that would hurt. I’m— I feel— Do I still have to do this I feel statement thing?” 

Quackity snorted before waving his hand dismissively. “Just speak.”

“I think resurrecting Schlatt is an awful idea. Like, there’s no way that’s going to end well. But I don’t— I don’t know!” He looked frustrated now, running his hands over the knitted yarn. “I’m tired of being told what to do. Of being used. I didn’t want you to feel the same way. You’re your own person, Quackity, you can do what you want. I trust you.”

“Oh.” Quackity said finally. 

“Oh.” Techno agreed, staring into the fire again. 

“Thanks? For trusting me, I guess,” Quackity shifted again, adjusting his wings against his back.

Techno just grunted, before looking towards Quackity again. Quackity was looking at him, too, nerves written across his face.

“Can we be friends again?” Quackity blurted out, flushing slightly.

“Sure,” Techno snorted, grabbing his knitting before standing up. He settled down again next to Quackity’s chair, head resting on the side of his thigh as he continued his soon-to-be mittens. They were varying shades of blue, and Techno planned to line them with soft fabric. 

He’d noticed how cold Quackity got, the man used to the much warmer temperatures of Manburg. He was slowly working on a set of winter clothes for him, starting with the mittens. Philza had recommended starting small, after teaching Techno the basics. 

Speak of the devil, Philza came up the staircase carrying a tray with three mugs on it. After handing them out, he settled into the chair Techno had abandoned, looking unbearably smug as he took a sip from his mug.

Techno knew that look. Techno feared that look.

“So!” Philza said cheerily, gesturing at Techno and Quackity, “When’s the wedding?”

#technoblade #quackity #philza #ph1lza #my fics #every day i talk about quacknoblade crack wedding and every day i dont write about that im so sorry LKDJFLKSDJFLDSKFJ #uwu! anyways #ok to reblog <3 #quacknobros

[gaysneeg]

Brief Passerine summary for those who haven’t read it

I would order these points under chapter but I can’t be bothered, sorry :p

Also this is all mostly from memory, with limited checking to make sure I got everything so if I missed something my bad. If you let me know, I can add it! It’s also kind of messy because I rushed a bit, sorry!

Techno and Phil are introduced as good friends (both are gods)

Phil leaves Techno's side

There’s a time skip and Phil is now a king with two sons (Wilbur and Tommy) and a wife

Techno enters Phil's kingdom, meets the sons and reunites with philza 

Wilbur trains under Techno

Techno and Wilbur both have voices in their head but neither know about the other yet

Tommy braids Techno’s hair under a tree, Wilbur is there too and they bond.

Phil’s wife dies and he leaves behind Techno to care for a 15 year old Wilbur and a 6 year old Tommy

Wilbur becomes king

Techno starts training Tommy

Time skip again, Tommy is 15 now

Wilbur is king

War begins, Techno trains the troupes as general and Wilbur's right hand man

On a battlefield, Wilbur Techno and Tommy are all fighting

Niki and Tubbo are also there (Tubbo is not close friends with tommy in this fic) 

A god of war attacks Wilbur, specifically wants revenge on Techno

Behind Tommy’s back, Wilbur planned to blow up the entire battlegrounds in order to win. He blows a horn to signal soldiers to run and blows the place up. 

Tommy and Wilbur argue about this because Tommy disagrees with the choice

Not many survive, and the last one to die is Tommy who is killed by the god of war. 

Phil returns and the god of war dies. 

Phil notes that the “Green God” could bring tommy back (it’s Dream by the way)

They set out to find him to ask to bring Tommy back.

 At one point a plan B is made where Techno will give up his godship to Phil, this is just a plan if Dream doesn’t want to bring Tommy back. 

They get there and Dream is not very nice

He reveals he was the voices in both Wilbur and Techno’s head

Dream admits he has been controlling people in an endless loop for a while

He’s compared to a spider on a web which is pretty neat

Wilbur gets mind controlled by dream and immediately fights Techno

He breaks out of control eventually 

Derealization for the next few points

The 3 enter individual dream worlds. 

In Phil, he speaks with tommy and once realizing that it’s not real, he has a talk with tommy where he realizes he needs to fight back. 

In Wilbur, he plays violin for his mother, but snaps out when he realized he does not play violin. He talks with his mother for a while before snapping out of it.

Techno talks with his dead sister, where he snaps out of it once he realizes he doesn't remember her name. 

Derealization over 

Before going back to the fight, Techno and Phil have a private interaction where techno gives his godhood to Phil. Wilbur does not find out until later that Techno is now mortal.

Phil talks to dream during the fight where (Techno and Wilbur are not present) where he admits he knows Dream is afraid of him. 

In order to defeat dream for good and preventing him from returning, Phil wants to sacrifice himself to trap Dream away for good.

Wilbur is upset that Phil is leaving again but forgives him anyway and they say their goodbyes. 

Techno and Wilbur return to the kingdom alone. 

Tommy is buried underneath a tree, where Wilbur and Techno play a song 

Techno and Wilbur were being put on “trial” for whether or not they should be exiled for their mistakes in war. They were allowed to stay. 

Wilbur meets Sally and has a kid (it’s Fundy)

The end :)

I missed a few really sweet scenes and some really cool ones too, but this is the general story so it’s what I included. If you can, I highly suggest reading passerine yourself. It’s very well written and not as angsty as I expected it to be . Still very sad and bittersweet, though so be warned if you do. 

#passerine #passerine spoilers #tw derealization #tw death

[jaywritesfics]

Since requests are open could I get platonic c!Tommy x female! reader?

Okay, so reader is almost perfect Technoblade copy. She is god at PvP, genius tactician and can build very well.

She never settles down, or at least it seems like it. She has a base far in the nether, hidden from everyone but not many know that. To people it seems like she is always on her way, gathering resources and training, always on the move.

One day, she saves smol (like 9-13 year old Tommy) from mobs and decides to help him with training (reader is already an adult). They form a parent-child bond and reader becomes this mother figure to him. However, reader after some time wants to leave, and does so, some time before events of the smp starts. She was kind of controlling the whole situation, as in as long as she was there she was the mediator for everyone, basically unofficial ruler of the server. The moment she disappeared, everything crumbled.

So, time skip to Tommy's exile when his mental and physical health is declining, reader returns from her adventures and stumbles upon him. She is angered at what had happened and after taking care of him and making sure to bring him to the normal state, she goes straight to the cities to bring back balance by kicking some ass.

I'm leaving ending up to you, hopefully it won't be this complicated

Good luck ❤️❤️❤️

OMG I LOVE THIS!!! I’m sorry if this seems a bit rushed... (Because it was...) I really wanted to get this done before the school week because I have so much stuff to do. I will make a second part since this was kinda short and not the entire story I had planned. I will try to get the second part out as soon as I can but for now I hope you enjoy this! I hope I did your request justice!

|Burning Pile |Part.1| Platonic c!Tommy x Reader|

Warnings?: Swearing, Angst, and mentions of suicide.

Request?: Yes!  Thanks lukerycyja for the request!

Pronouns?: None used but female reader implied. Also sorry if this isn’t completely accurate to the canon smp storylie its been so long since I’ve watched any of Tommyinnits Lore streams due to school work, so please cut me slack if I messed up on any of that stuff...0-0 

Extra notes?: Part two is on it’s way soon!

“Shit…” You’ve been traveling the surface for hours and you just now realized you forgot your axe at your base. You groan in annoyance and find a nearby tree and sit down to relax because your feet had started to hurt and you open your bag and take out some apples to eat. You usually come to the surface every other month for food and resources, as you live in the nether and it doesn’t have cows and pigs… Well unless you can call those Piglin actual pigs.

“Okay,” You begin to say to yourself, 

“I forgot my axe and now I have to go all the way back to my portal…*sigh*, why do I do this to myself?” You take a bite of your apple and you just sit and take in the scenery. When you spot a couple of tree stumps and a wood wall not too far away from where your sat.

 “Oh shit.” You say aloud, dropping your apple. You hear the sound of humming coming from behind the wall and you stand up to hurry and get out of there…You never interact with anyone… your by yourself all the time... You used to have company though. A little boy you saved so many years ago. Tommy. His name was Tommy. You basically raised him for years… He was like a son to you. You trained him to fight and fend for himself when he eventually grew up and didn’t need you anymore. You haven’t seen him since you decided to leave. Why did you leave? You can’t quite remember. You hear a voice coming from behind the wall… it sounds so familiar. You near the wall and you place an ear against it to listen in on whoever is behind it. 

“Why Tubbo? Why. Why? Why?” The voice sounds even more familiar than before, Is it who you think it is? If so, who's Tubbo? Maybe it’s not him… It couldn’t be… You walk around and spot an opening and you peer around the corner. You see the backside of the person. Short yet untamed blonde hair, Red and white tore shirt and ripped tan pants. It’s him… It has to be… You step inside the structure, tears rolling down your face. 

“Tommy?” You say in a shaky voice. He turns around eyes wide. He has bags under his eyes, and the once light blue color has faded to blue-tinted grey. He stares at you and his jaw drops. A single tear falls from his eye then he shuts his mouth and turns away covering his ears with his hands.

“Dream whatever sick game you're playing I’m not falling for it! One of these days so help me I’ll kill you!”  Dream? Who is… Shit, You’ve been gone so long you can’t seem to remember a single damn other person. 

“Tommy, I don’t know who Dream is but… it’s me… Y/n… I- I’m sorry for leaving I just…”

“Just stop!” He throws a sword at your head but it just misses you and hits the wall beside you. 

“Now come on I taught you better than that…” You say to him, walking up to him and kneeling down to look him in the eyes. 

“It’s really me Tommy-” You try to finish your sentence but he already has his arms wrapped around you. You can feel teardrops falling on your shoulders and you can’t help but start crying too.

“Y/n… I missed you! Why did you have to leave! You bitch!” He hugs you tighter as he speaks, more tears rolling down his face.

“I’m sorry Tommy I just… I don’t remember… and- I- I’m sorry…” Your makeshift “family reunion” is interrupted by an arrow flying past both your heads. You stand up and turn around to see a tall man in a green hoodie with a mask with some silly face on it. It must be that Dream guy Tommy was talking about. 

“Who the fuck are you bitch?” He says pointing his crossbow at you. 

“What did you just call me? Also, a 5-year-old called, he wants his arts and crafts project back.” You say, he tenses up and takes a step forward.

“Leave now or I’ll put an arrow in your head, bitch.” He adjusts his crossbow and you reach for the bow and arrow on your back and in an instant you fire an arrow at him, piercing his arm. 

“Now I could have put it through your head but I like to look my victims in the eyes when I kill them… it's more fun that way.” You tell him with a huge grin on your face. He drops his crossbow and pulls the arrow out of his arm and takes an ender pearl out of his pocket and throws it in the distance and he disappears within seconds. You look behind you to see Tommy shocked and crying. You kneel down, pick him up and start walking him over to what seems to be his bed. You set him down and give him one of the apples in your bag. 

“Are you okay Tommy? You don’t seem well.” You tell him, wiping the tears from his eyes. 

“I’m- I’m fine-” He tries to get his words out but he passes out and you quickly pick him up and hold him in your arms. You can still feel him breathing so you don’t worry too much, but you also can’t help but cry. You lay him down and you put his blanket over him. You decide that he probably is just stressed out and needs sleep so you let him rest. You take this time to hunt down some cows and pigs for food. You walk around paranoid that Dream might come back and try to hurt you or Tommy. You bag about 2 cows and 4 pigs and just as you return from hunting you see Tommy sitting on the bed with his face buried in his hands. You drop your kills and you walk over to sit down on the bed beside him. 

“You feel a bit better? If so then I gotta ask you… What are you doing alone out here all by yourself? You’re only like what, 16 at most? When I left, you had friends and other allies… how did you end up all alone?” You question him, he looks at you angered,

“How did I end up alone? How did I fucking end up alone?” He then stands up and starts to yell at you,

“You fucking left me! You left me with nothing but a couple of years of bloody sword training and the mentality of a soldier! I thought you actually cared for me like a son… But no, you just saw me as another helpless little boy who needed your guidance… Well, I don’t need your help! I can’t be helped! I’m the one who got exiled. I’m the one whose friends betrayed him!” His voice goes from a yell to a soft stern voice.

“I tried to build a nation… It was amazing... but I fail at everything. It crumbled...I should have never even tried… I should have offed myself when I had the chance…” He’s on the floor on his knees, sobbing with his head in his hands again. You stand up from the bed and kneel down to hug him. 

“Tommy… I’m so sorry that that’s how you felt about it… I had no idea how I really affected you… Tommy… I- I’m so sorry… I do love you like a son Tommy... And you’re the best son anyone could ask for… your not a failure, you deserve to live… but may I ask…”

You release him from the hug and look at him in the eyes,

“What do you mean by exiled?” (you decide to skip over the whole “build a nation” part, because you really aren’t surprised by it.) 

“Tubbo- I mean Dream. Well… They banished me from L’manberg they banished me from my home!  They banished me here to live on my own… I have nothing…”

“You don’t have nothing… You have me. I’ll help you, Tommy.” Your blood boils. They banished Tommy... Why? You don’t care… either way, you’re going to kill them… Whoever this Tubbo guy is… Your gonna kill him and Dream. You stand up and bring Tommy to his feet and wipe away his tears. 

“Go practice your sword throwing Tommy, I’ll make us some dinner.” You say as you walk over to the sword he had previously attempted to throw at you and take it out the wall.

“Hey, my sword throwing is great!” 

“Heh.. sure.” You hand him his sword and he groans jokingly and he walks outside and starts throwing his sword at some tree. You chuckle at the sight and you start to prepare your guy’s meal. You also grab your own sword and examine it. You sigh,

“Those bitches are gonna get what’s coming to them…” You whisper to yourself under your breath.

“Hey y/n! I hit my target!” Tommy yells to you.

“Good Tommy! I’m proud of you…”

#tommy mcyt #platonic tommyinnit x reader #mcyt fanfiction #platonic mcyt fanfiction #dream team #fanficion request

[teatimecrumpetsandsugar]

ethereal (voltron fantasy/royalty AU) (set up; part zero)

Heyo! It’s your friendly neighborhood Voltron fanfic aficionado- now your friendly neighborhood Klance writer but that’s honestly besides the point I don’t even know why you’d bring up my increasing obsession with them in this Klance fanfic that I swear everyone else will be in, too-

Today, I’ll be writing from a fantasy royalty AU with my favorite show cast ever, even though it may or may not be solely because I want to put water elemental!king!Lance in pretty dresses and makeup and just go crazy with my descriptions of gowns and other things.

I imagine, here, Lance would be from a kingdom with strong ties to Pidge’s kingdom, who has strong ties with Hunk’s kingdom, making them a powerful trifecta. I also imagine that Keith and Lance’s kingdoms are on very thin ice with one another, so Pidge encourages Lance to sit down with fire elemental!king!Keith. 

I also imagine that Pidge’s kingdom is closely allied with Allura’s and that the two of them grew up together, while she didn’t meet Hunk or Lance until she became queen. Also, I’d like to have my beloved Ruler Pidge go by she/they pronouns, simply because I see a lot of myself in the way she dresses and carries herself and I actually believe that these pronouns would fit her, alongside all pronouns.

Hunk and Lance likely grew up together in a very close ally ship and continue to be close friends well into adulthood because that’s just how they are. I can imagine Lance is very vaguely aware of Allura’s kingdom and would never dream of picking a fight with hers since, by default, allying with Pidge made him allies with Allura, but he probably doesn’t know her very well pre the canon timeline because I kind of want to build that relationship from the ground up to make up for what the show did to me-

Keith is definitely allied with Shiro, and Pidge and Shiro were always friends through her older brother, who, along with her father, abdicated from the throne and joined an adventurer’s guild instead (because they believed that Pidge would be a better fit for a ruler and decided that, given how they are, reconnaissance and exploration fit them better. She agreed with this insight, deciding to rule the kingdom the best way she knew how). Shiro, being a much more experienced king and friends with their brother, likely prepared them for the role as they grew into it; the two are on friendly terms, but allied isn’t exactly the right term as none of the people in their alliance knew Keith, so they weren’t sure they could ally with him. 

Lance met Keith at a gala years into his reign; they did not get along.

The system of Magic here will likely be dictated by what element one is born in the kingdom of, (i.e., Lance’s kingdom being the Aqua Kingdom, Pidge’s being the Spiritus Kingdom) and the strength of it in each person will be chosen based on a random set of variables that usually depends on the mood of the Gods corresponding to each element.

Lance- Water (Aqua Kingdom)

Keith- Fire (Ignis Kingdom)

Pidge- Life (Spiritus Kingdom)

Hunk- Earth (Terra Kingdom)

Shiro- Moon (Luna Kingdom)

Allura- Light (Lux Kingdom)

I imagine the reason an alliance is called for with Keith and Shiro’s kingdoms is because a traitor to Allura’s kingdom, either Lotor is planning on starting an entire mutiny with the ranks he’s managed to gather and then, consequently, conquer all of the rest of the kingdoms by force in the name of a long-dead kingdom- the Tenebris kingdom. His parents having died in the midst of a total economic crash caused by a codependent relationship with Allura’s kingdom whilst it was under her father’s rule, he was taken in by the state of Lux by Allura’s request, since they grew up together; unfortunately Lotor held lingering feelings of resentment- towards Lux, for causing the destruction of the only thing he could’ve ever considered his own by right, and towards his parents for always making him feel as if he was of no worth. He wants to conquer the entire world just to prove to himself that he is worth something, though, unfortunately, he’s on a path straight to death.

Might redeem him, might kill him off, might exile him- who knows at this point?

Hunk, I imagine, was a commoner who won the title of king through a series of magic-based trials (upon the death of the last ruler) and now keeps his entire family in the palace with him, using his title to take care of his family and citizens as a benevolent ruler. This likely happened when he was quite young- likely when he was 9 or 10, since magic is an innate thing and, in this kingdom, it’s tested in the youngest members of the kingdom in order to deem who is the most connected to their Goddess Terra.

Allura inherited her title when her own father died in the conflict with Tenebris- he went to battle with the people they’d unintentionally doomed in order to protect his daughter and his people, and died in the process; similar to her story in Voltron except her kingdom survives and Lotor and a select few survivors of the Galra become refugees.

Keith became king by beating the previous king’s son in a battle- his mother, being one of the higher ups in the government, sent word to him that the prince didn’t want to be king, so Keith wound up challenging him for the title. He won, successfully making his way into the world of prestige and getting closer to his mother. The prince left the kingdom shortly after- it’s believed that he ran away to be with someone, but no one is quite sure. All anyone knows is that he’s happy.

Lance wound up being king at a really young age- I’m imagining that, prior to his reign, his kingdom was incredibly strictly patriarchal. The previous king likely only had daughters, and the day of his death, Lance was born with incredibly powerful water magic. As a result, at the age of 6 years old, he was forcibly taken from his poor family and raised strictly to be a perfect king- however, he still saw his sister Veronica frequently in secret, the two of them sneaking around to eat baked goods and try on dresses together. When the palace staff found out, they tightened security and warned Veronica that she was no longer allowed to see him unless she wanted to be publicly executed. After his coronation (at age 8), however, he started making drastic changes to the laws that made the laws against commoners interacting with royalty more lax, and, once allowed to dress himself, started wearing dresses and makeup because it reminded him of home and made him feel as beautiful as he knew he was. He gets quite homesick quite often, and he’s still battling to get his family into the palace with him- he has, however, stripped the kingdom of its strict patriarchy. He constantly tells the kingdom that he hopes to one day pass the throne down to his own future daughter and still keeps the three princesses as his trusted advisors because he believes what happened to them was horribly unjust. The story will be told primarily from his perspective.

Shiro became ruler of his kingdom by fighting his way through gladiator ranks when he was only thirteen, winning the entire kingdom by brute force alone and leaving him with a lot more experience and trauma than he’d have liked. Being the oldest of the current generation of rulers and having inherited a kingdom that was closely related to Pidge’s and Keith’s, he guided them both through the process of becoming a ruler and the process of ruling, no matter how difficult it gets. It’s taken far longer with Keith than it has Pidge, since Pidge was raised a royal and has an innate sense of leadership and Keith is... interesting at the whole being a royal thing. Shiro, having grown up with Keith’s mother on the streets of the kingdom of Tenebris, was more than happy to take Keith under his wing- it helps the both of them come out of their shells more, so they have a mutual appreciation for one another.

I imagine this world will be vaguely futuristic and medieval at the same time- they’ll be able to have video conferences and reach other via communicators, holographic calls, things of that nature; but they’ll also be pretty old-fashioned in their manners of dress, their social systems, their currencies, and the vast majority of their laws. I hope that makes sense.

I wonder if it’s visible here that I spent three hours winging this and started getting more and more into it as I went, or if it’s obvious that I spend most of my time working with really obscure fantasy concepts. 

BAHDHAAHAHA I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY THIS- 

If you’ve got any suggestions for relationship dynamics (platonic, romantic, or otherwise), any pitches for traits you think the characters may have based on their slightly altered backstories, or any feedback in general, feel free to share- I hope you all find this as fascinating as I did while I was writing it!

Also, @keefsteefs It’s happening, I’m doing it, it’s gonna be so fricking awesome-

#voltron #voltron au #voltron alternate universe #VLD #Voltron legendary defender #klance #voltron klance #vld klance #voltron keith #voltron lance #voltron hunk #voltron pidge #voltron allura #voltron shiro #voltron lotor

[homestuckexamination]

They may not be inherintly bad because of the ages of Propaganda and Empress influence, but I have a really hard time finding good in Trolls who's evil are so deeply rooted, especially the higher Bloods like Chahut, Marvus and Trizza. But alright, let's say there was someone charismatic and knowing enough to lead a Troll to "the right path", it would be very hard since for that to work many others would have to be on board with that.

Chahut is liberal with murdering and killing because it’s normal on Alternia, but she’s actually very faithful to her religion, to the point of actually seeing how it’s not followed outside of Alternia as bad, which makes her resent Exile in general, and in turn, the whole vibe of the Empire. In doing so, she takes advantage of this despondency to give MSPAR a free pass in going to Clown Church like “What are they going to do, hah, cull me? Will be doing me a favor”, using her privilege to leverage for someone who may otherwise get in trouble without her around. Of course, Friendsim is not Hiveswap, but it does expand on the personality of the Trolls. Chahut’s notion of killing is skewed, but she has morals and isn’t just an empirical lackey, for example, which is saying something. Marvus on the other hand, while keeping appearances, is ABSOLUTELY not fucking deeply rooted evil, if anything Marvus seems to actually, genuinely be trying to subvert the system in some way, and helping turn it on its head every chance he gets- Giving Joey free passes while trying to convince the Purples the fake killings are real, helping her get the Tickets from Zebruh, offering Chixie a remote, safe way of broadcasting into Jeevik Week if you tell Marvus she’s the Mask, and humoring what’s basically an illegal theoretical law thesis to upturn the Alternian Legal System with not a single complain. He is still a Murderclown, he is still desensitized to Death, but to say he’s deeply rooted in evil and unchangeable is an entire misread of his character I feel, and if HE is an example of unredeemable evil, I’m not exactly sure what to say.

Trizza is just a dick and taking full advantage of her privilege, there’s literally nothing to defend about her-

Ultimately though, yes, that is the point? Alternia is decentralized and automated, the power structures incite this caste violence, Trolls are forced into Space Exile upon adulthood, the caretakers of the Mother Grub aren’t allowed outside interaction and then are sent to off-world cloisters... All of this, all of these, are cautions an evil Tyrant and a literal God have put into place trying to keep people from raising up against the oppressive regime. Gl’bgolyb is the biggest deterrent, threatening Condy can make her literally wipe out entire castes with a snap of her finger, and if unsatisfied if Condy was killed and people didn’t know how to handle this Eldritch Horror, it could end up wiping out the entirety of the Troll Race in one single glub. And yet with the threat of complete psychic annihilation, at least two MAJOR uprisings happened, that were severe enough and swayed the minds of the people enough that Condy had to change the way Alternia worked to help prevent it from happening again, and even with ALL OF THIS, Dammek is working with at least One Violet and revolutionary sentiment to change the system is something that exists within a lot of Trolls we’ve seen, and the teachings of these revolutionaries live on and are passed down long enough to have people actually working to ensure Karkat has a Lusus and stays off the grid by the time he lands on Alternia.

Alternia is a world designed to be hyper-brutal, crush revolutionary sentiment, and enforce casteism, violence and turncoating. And even THEN we’re constantly reminded of people lashing back against the system, breaking the rules, making exceptions, and trying to be themselves and be happy and aid those around them.

I reiterate. Trolls are People. They’re Humanlike in their way of being. There’s a inherent kindness and sympathy in them that cannot be crushed even by Alternia. To think they’re inherently evil and unchangeable misses the point of Alternia’s brutality, and ignores the strides they’ve made in TRYING to change the system.

#Trolls #Homestuck #Fanon #THeories #Hiveswap #Marvus #Chahut #Hiveswap Act 2

[dalekofchaos]

Why Voldemort is a terrible villain and how I’d improve Voldemort as a villain

As much as I like Voldemort, when you look back on the books. Voldemort is a terrible villain. Yes he has the Horcruxes and has loyal followers...but that’s it. In this post I will be examining why Voldemort is a terrible villain in Harry Potter and how I would improve Voldemort as a villain.

Let’s look at Voldemort’s track record

No clear motivations. The movies do absolutely nothing to flesh out Voldemort, but that's understandable, they're the movies. But even in the books, there is no clear reason for Voldemort doing any of the things that he does. During the flashbacks in the Pensive, Tom is a disturbed child who has a tendency to torture animals, lure other children to creepy caves and steal stuff - all of this is bad, yes, but why? Why is Tom Riddle "evil"? I know the explanation that the canon somewhat provides: that Voldemort doesn't know love/friendship/connection because he was conceived under the trickery of a love potion, and his mother was abused But, even if you accept that explanation, that does not justify Tom Riddle being innately evil and monstrous. Why is he racist/supremacist? If he really is a natural genius with a detachment from human emotion, shouldn't he also be detached from things like blood supremacy, ancestry and mortality? Just because he's a sociopath doesn't mean he will automatically turn into Hitler.

Wages a Wizarding war, but couldn’t even conquer his own Wizarding Nation

He couldn’t become Minister Of Magic. Instead he dicked around in Borgins And Burkes and instead wanted to become Defense Against The Dark Arts Professor.....for reasons. He could’ve used his power as Minister Of Magic to gain followers, especially the fanatic pure blood families and the impressionable Slytherins and cover for his Horcrux murders. But nooo.

When Voldemort DOES take power by force during the second Wizarding War, he does barely anything with it. Voldemort owns the government and has an army of evil. Where does he plan to launch his attack on the world? At a god damn highschool. Yes I know he attacked Hogwarts because of the last Horcrux. Didn't need to get that far if he didn't act like the world's worst Bond villain and monologued for enough time to let Harry either escape or for the Deus ex machina to arrive on que. The first two times it happens, yeah I get it. You're a villain who is up himself, shit happens. But by book 5 when he is still doing dumb shit it's unforgivable. How hard is it to issue a kill on sight order to your hordes of evil? I mean FFS you have legit werewolves on your side, who can sniff out a drop of blood miles away and yet you do nothing with them? Not only do you fail to kill a defenseless baby but you can't evil kill the kid when he's locked up in your second in commands basement.

He isn't particularly charismatic or a decent leader. He does have tons of followers, for reasons. Seriously, except for fear and opportunism I can't understand why anybody would want to fight for him. I mean, I get that he is basically magic!Hitler, but actual Hitler could at least hold speeches. Actual Hitler had arguments why his rule would be good for the German people. Voldemort doesn't. Voldemort treats his followers like shit and tortures or kills them if they aren't useful any more.

He didn't do his homework and doesn't knows the magic lore good enough. He manages to kill himself two times because of lore he really should have known about. The first time he fails to see the magic love-charm, the second time he doesn't recognizes the arcane rules of wand ownership. Those are stupid, avoidable mistakes for somebody that is supposed to be the greatest dark mage of his time.

He isn't even a particularly good mage. He manages to get statemaled by Harry and defeated by Dumbledore. He never does anything truly remarkable with magic that we haven't seen other characters do the same or better (the cave in book six is pretty good, but that's already has best showing). All we see is “AVADA KEDAVA.” Cool, I’ve seen every damn villain use that stupid fucking spell and yes it is a terrible spell.

His plans are... well, they are shit. If your plans get permanently foiled by a bunch of meddeling kids, you should think about retirement, not world domination. The plan in "Goblet of fire" only works out because of dumb luck. "Orden of phoenix" works out because of Harrys incompetence. The plan to kill Dumbledore only worked cause Voldemort used logic and had one of his followers do the work for him. The rest of his plans fail gloriously.

Voldemort's goals. He... wants to be immortal, but why? Because he's afraid of death? Why is he afraid of death? He literally spent his childhood cutting open rabbits. He excelled in all fields of academia and is arguably very intelligent; intelligence tends to negate superstition. Okay, fine; let's assume he's afraid of death. But even if we look for another explanation: maybe he wants to live forever in order to stay in power.

Voldemort wants power...Why does he want power? Why does he want to, quite literally, take over the world? It makes no sense. He has no reason to care about any of that. Even if he's prejudiced against Muggles, what exactly gives him the willpower to actually gather followers, build a legion of darkdoom evil squad and kill everyone? His motivations are never explained, and he is introduced to the story as a 2-dimensional "bad guy". Even from the 4th book onward, Voldemort is never actually fleshed out. He simply goes from bad guy to "extremely bad guy/"super fucking evil". It's shallow. It's a bad character. He isn't even a character. He has no depth, nuance, relatability or layers to him. He's just a textbook douchebag who exists simply to give the protagonists something to do, because otherwise the stories would just be about magic school.

Let's look at the closest and most obvious reflection: Adolf Hitler. It's painfully obvious that Voldemort's movement is based on Nazism. But if you read Mein Kampf, Hitler actually believed what he was doing was justified, and provided reasons for it which he thought made sense. Even if it was objectively flawed, he believed it. That's what makes a good character in fiction; even if they're actually batshit fucking insane and critically evil, you can make them relatable if you go inside their head and show the audience why they're doing what they're doing. Even if the audience doesn't agree with the character, the audience understands why the character thinks this way. Unlike Hitler's diary, Voldemort has no level of self-introspection, no actual justifications. He's a walking plot device, and that's ridiculously bad for a 7-book-long story where he's the main antagonist. I don't remember a single interaction, scene or exchange where Voldemort is shown to have any degree of self-awareness. The youngest we ever see him is when Dumbledore visits him in the orphanage, and by that point he's already evil as balls, for seemingly no reason. Even when Harry is talking to him in their final fight, Voldemort only hisses and spits out superficial threats and a shallow understanding of the events around him, and actually has no idea who he is, or why he's doing what he does. . If he were a realistic character, this lack of self-awareness would build up over time, would create self-doubt in him, and he would go through a character arc where he "found himself" and learned what he really wanted. And then, maybe he comes back and does some crazy shit, but this time he does them with glorious conviction, and has no shame in admitting it. The audience knows him now, and he's a great villain. But that's not what we got. Remember the 13-odd years Voldemort spent floating around like a puff of gas, possessing rats and squatting in Quirrel's turban? Why did his character not develop? HE HAD THIRTEEN FUCKING YEARS TO REFLECT ON HIMSELF. He literally had nothing else to do. He could've become such a complex character. Think about it: a bland, textbook villain gets cucked into infinity and now can't actually do anything but bide his time. It would clearly affect his personality, especially if it lasts 13 goddamn years. But when Voldemort is revived in book 4, he's still just "look how evil I am.exe". He had literally no character arc of any kind. That's actually impossible. No sentient human being can have the same personality, goals and motivations after over a decade of exile. He's a badly-written villain, plain and simple.

It seems like a very poor decision to make the antagonist of 7 thick books this unrelatable and bland. It also makes no sense because Rowling has written consistently excellent characters throughout the series. Why not make Voldemort a real character?

So here is how I would improve Voldemort as a villain

Motivation. So since it's universally accepted that Salazar was against Muggleorns because he grew up in a time where Wizards and Witches were being burned at the stake. What if Voldemort had similar intentions cause he grew up in a time during WWII and the Cold War and saw how powerful and dangerous the Muggles were becoming with their nuclear weapons and wanted to protect magic kind from the Muggles and viewed the Muggles invading a possibility. So he became Lord Voldemort and formed the Death Eaters to finish Salazar Slytherin’s work to protect magic kind against Muggles and Muggleborns. It could’ve started out as noble, but turned racist and evil in the end.  

As Tom Riddle, he becomes the Minister Of Magic or given a position of power secondary to the Minister Of Magic. The Lord Of Magic. It’s important that prior to becoming Lord Voldemort, he should hold a position of political power within the Ministry Of Magic. In Hogwarts, it is said as a student Tom was charismatic, charming and a wolf in sheep’s clothing. So why not use all that for politics? He could use his charm and political power to turn the Ministry Of Magic against the Muggleborns and against the Muggles. He would write a book explaining in detail why he believes in what he believes and that gives him the following he needs. The Book in question would be called “Magic Is Might!” The old Pure Blood magical families and impressionable young Slytherins would follow him like moths to a flame.  He could use his newfound political power to research all forms of magic and even the dark arts. He could make Horcruxes in secret. As Voldemort he would gather allies who were rejected by society like Werewolves and Giants. But despite what the Horcruxes do to his face, he could use magic to keep up appearances. He wouldn’t just be seeking to wage war with the muggles and muggleborns. First Voldemort has to take over the Wizarding world. 

Treats his followers like allies. Voldemort does not use fear and the threat of death and torture on his most trusted allies. Tom Riddle’s the Knights of Walpurgis hold key positions in Tom Riddle’s administration and then the Death Eaters are born and Voldemort treats them with respect and admiration. In a sense, he treats the Death Eaters like family.

The First WIzarding War should have been about Voldemort waging war on the other Wizarding nations. This would truly show how terrifying and powerful Voldemort really is. Would also explain why the other nations did not interfere in the second war, cause they were that terrified of Voldemort. The Order Of Phoenix was barely able to win and drive Voldemort from power. 

Voldemort’s fall was because he was desperate. He was ousted from power and Dumbledore, the OOTP and Aurors are on his trail. His body is failing him, so he desperately needs to create a new Horcrux. So he kills The Potters. He fully knew that Lily used the love charm to shield Harry from him. So He saw a way out. Voldemort purposefully destroyed himself so he could gain a new Horcrux. 

Plus, we can have Voldemort hide the Horcruxes in the nations he conquered. So Voldemort can hide them in -Russia -Germany -America -Hogwarts -France Obviously Nagini would be by his side at all times and well Harry is the last one. For context of how Voldemort conquered these nations. Imperio, subterfuge, and mass hysteria. He took out the Wizarding governments and implanted them with his thrawls.

Make Voldemort as hated as Umbridge. Here’s how.

In my hypothetical scenario where Voldemort hides the Horcruxes in different Wizarding Nations, make 8 books. Book 7 ends with everyone graduating from Hogwarts and the fall of the Ministry. 

This way, after graduation, the Ministry has fallen and it ends with the Big Seven on the run. In Book 8 they are all on the hunt for the Horcruxes. Not just for Horcruxes, but international allies to unite the Wizarding world against Voldemort. It ends with the final confrontation being at the Ministry. Voldemort's endgame plan is not just to wipe out the Muggleborns, but wiping out the Muggles. He has the Magic equivalent to a Nuclear bomb. Voldemort wants to destroy the Muggles and recreate the world in his image. Magic Is Might! He plans on using it and Harry has to stop him before it's too late

Voldemort fails because the Horcruxes are failing him. It isn’t immortality, it is only temporarily longevity and every time one of his Horcruxes gets destroyed, his body breaks down and his soul is in an even worse shape.  When Nagini is destroyed, it is over. Voldemort thinks if he can kill Harry, he will live forever as the prophecy states “only one can live forever.” so he believes if he could just kill Harry, he can win. But Harry deflects his curses and sends it right back at him. Voldemort dies as he did in the book. Powerless, alone and human.

#Harry Potter #Lord Voldemort #Tom Marvolo Riddle #Anti JK Rowling

[talks-refined]

Why azula, in my opinion, shouldn’t have had a redemption arc

i know it’s a complicated subject in this fandom but i wanted to give my two cents on it! i promise this isn’t me just going “booh evil”

okay so here’s the thing. the reason this is so complicated to answer is because it needs to ask pretty existential and complex questions like, can everyone be redeemed? how is evil made? how much of you is really only your upbringing? is it possible to be inherently bad? what do we fundamentally deserve? can you separate yourself completely from what you’ve been since birth and if so, what’s left?

now if you walked up to me and asked those questions, my answer would probably be something along the lines of “i don’t know, i just got here”. so that’s not what i’m gonna try to answer here

notice how i said “shouldn’t have had” and not “deserved”. i can’t tell you what azula “deserved”— probably a nicer childhood and therapy— but i can also say azula didn’t “deserve” anything. she’s a character, she’s words on paper, animation and voiced acting. there isn’t a real azula, an actual 14 years old child soldier out there awaiting to turn good. characters are story arcs, development, goals... what makes their value isn’t morals but what they bring to the story. and azula brings so much that, in my opinion, being ultimately redeemed would cheapen

first off: zuko. i’ve seen people say azula shouldn’t get a redemption arc because then her story would just be the same as zuko. it’s... not true, obviously, they’re different characters for a reason, but there is a part of truth i wanna point out here:

zuko and azula’s stories are diametrical opposites. two siblings, a boy and a girl, a firebending prodigy and one who’s average at the very best, one favored by his mother, the other favored by her father, one impulsive and one calculating. At the beginning of the story, one angry and unstable, the other calm and confident, one banished, desperate and without honor, and the other a princess and leader, acclaimed by all, who radiates regal energy.

“(ozai) said she was born lucky. he said i was lucky to be born. i don’t need luck, though. i don’t want it. i’ve always had to struggle and fight and that’s made me strong. that’s made me who i am.”

( zuko, to aang, season 1 finale )

that first sentence was the hook that told the viewers azula would come in the picture in season 2 and it tells you exactly the opposite dynamics their characters would develop on. azula is perfect, zuko is a failure is the message we’re supposed to get, at least that’s how they view each other and themselves, because that’s what their father taught them. but here’s the thing: luck is by definition elusive, and perfection is by definition unattainable. azula spends her life building herself around the vision that failure is inexcusable. because she’s at such a high place, because she’s so perfect, she can never fail, because she can’t and because she’s not allowed to. that mentality is bound to doom her, it’s inevitable. it’s a direct opposition to zuko, who builds himself in the fact that he’s failed so many times, that he made so many mistakes, that each taught him lessons. when zuko fails once, he knows he can get up because he was miserable for so long that it taught him he can survive anything. when azula fails once, she crumbles. azula is a cautionary tale of perfectionism, and cautionary tales can’t have happy endings. zuko’s approach of life has to reach a happy ending, because he’ll always look for one, it has to reach a redemption arc because he’s not scared of the mistakes he’s made in the past and he is always trying to better himself (the redemption comes when he realises he was trying to meet the wrong standards). azula’s approach of life guarantees a downfall because she’s convinced that failure is the end.

both their stories mirror each other, backwards. when we meet zuko, he’s failing, always, and when we leave him, he finally won. when we meet azula she’s winning, always, and when we leave her, she finally (by which i mean that it’s inevitable, not that it’s good) fails.

and there’s another reason (let’s pretend this is structured, okay?), that’s a little more complicated, and it has to do with ozai.

you know how ozai is barely present in the series? i’ve seen some people argue that azula is a better villain because she’s scarier or because we see her more. here’s the thing:

when you’re trying to portray something that’s really, really awful, it’s easier not show it. when you show something, in it’s entirety (in that context that would mean making ozai a deep, 3 dimensional character that we see develop) it’s... small. to define is to limit (- oscar wilde). when you only show small things tho, details, in movies it can be shadows, think the beginning of stranger things when you don’t see monsters, but can feel a threat, that’s when it can get scary as shit. because whatever limited, physical (or character-ial? is that a word) form you chose for the villain isn’t there in people’s minds, it’s only their own imagination trying to comprehend what you made them feel. and what people imagine based on only fear, or anger, is easily scarier than any five headed monster you can put onscreen.

that’s what ozai is: a looming threat. hell, i’m not even sure we see his face until season 3. he only has a handful of scenes. but i hate him. i hate him so much i could scream into a pillow and he’s so vicious it sends shivers down my spine. you know why? because of what he did to zuko and azula.

when you wanna keep your main villain mysterious, it’s good to give the audience characters that he’s interacted with. characters that he’s close to enough to have had an effect on them, so they can perceive a part of him. and boy did he have an effect on his children

( to be fair here: that idea and most of what i’m saying about it came from Overly Sarcastic Productions video on minions as a trope. it’s really good i love their whole channel, red is amazing)

season 1: meet zuko. he’s a sixteen years old. he’s a bad guy, but written so that you sympathise with him to a certain extent. then comes the Tragic Backstory Episode and you learn that he was challenged to a duel as a thirteen years old by his father after he spoke without permission in a meeting, begged for mercy, got half of his face burned off at the hands of his father, and was banished from his home to search for the avatar, who was dead as far as anyone knew.

now you’ve seen very little of ozai after this episode, but you’re ready to fight that guy, right? i know i am.

it gains a level of depth with azula. after being introduced to a character who is starving for his father’s love and approval, we’re introduced to a new character, who seemingly has all of that. azula is zuko’s ever winning rival. she has everything he wants, her honor, her title, her father’s favors.

(i think it’s worth noting that making your children compete for your love is already a red flag for noticing pieces of shit)

but it’s not enough. azula has everything, she is everything ozai values (cunning, strong, ruthless) and even then it’s not enough to please him. nothing will ever be good enough. and you see two children fighting, breaking themselves to please a father that is seemingly incapable of love, but keeps baiting them, giving them impossible standards to reach so they’ll always keep trying to please him.

okay, now you hate him, right?

but here’s the thing: because azula was a firebending prodigy, she got a taste of her father’s approval. he saw himself in her, where he saw too much of iroh and ursa in zuko. he was proud of her.

he was never proud of zuko. too soft, not strong, or fearless enough. because of that, zuko was never close to his dad. all he got was disdain. because of that, he forms bonds with other people (with his mother and uncle, at first) that expose him to another vision of life. and in exile, after chasing relentlessly, part of him is pushed to the realisation that he can live without his father’s approval. because he had to.

azula on the other hand, quickly becomes all ozai’s. from flashbacks you can clearly tell each of them gravitates around one parent, zuko around ursa and azula around ozai. even in her other relationships (zuko, tylee, mai...) she behaves according to what her father taught her, how to manipulate and hurt others

and ursa has flaws, god i’m not saying she doesn’t. that deserves a post in itself. but she values things like kindness, softness and love. ozai values strength, power and cunning. childhood is a formative stage: you often build yourself on the way you were raised. zuko had those conflicting values, because ursa, and ozai more indirectly, both taught him. but ozai isolated azula from other (adult) presences. this is more speculation but i really think it’s true, for what it’s worth. we rarely ever see ursa and azula interact, and when we do ursa is i think always? reprimanding azula for something that ozai taught her. it doesn’t seem like they spend enough time together for her to teach her daughter a better way.

that’s the thing. ozai’s “love”, or at least approval, was azula’s curse. zuko thinks it’s something he has to aim for, and later realizes it’s only ever going to be conditional and manipulative and stops trying. because he knew another way. but azula always lived with it. it isolated her, prevented her from ever finding a better way. his “love” is what did this to her

so yeah. none of this is saying that azula could never have been good. she was 14, she had a whole life ahead, i’m not some psychology master that can tell you exactly if it’s even possible to unlearn so much manipulation and abuse- i want to believe it is. but this is a story, and to me it’s the more nuanced, more interesting, better story they could’ve written. i think having those two very different and very paralleled stories, for a show that doesn’t shy away from complexity the way atla does, was very important.

while i was writing this, i showed it to a friend, who can speak for toxic households better than i can, and gave me a new perspective and the best conclusion: when in an abusive parental relationship, there’s always a tearing hesitation between ‘breaking free’ and doing what’s best for you, and staying loyal to your parent, someone you’re supposed to love and who’s supposed to love you. zuko is a message of hope ; azula is a warning

#azula #princess azula #atla #Avatar The Last Airbender #azula redemption arc #please be nice

[rpgsandbox]

     Mock-ups for the Legends of Avallen rulebook, artbook, and playing cards

"From that island at the end of the world, no soldier returned without tales of wonder – walking forests, talking fae, enigmatic shapes half man and half beast: things that you ought not to believe unless you see them yourself.” — Kaato the Sage, writing on the invasion of Avallen

Legends of Avallen is an indie tabletop RPG inspired by Celtic mythology and Roman-occupied Britain. In this fantasy world, players and gamemasters alike will play out tales and themes of humble beginnings, the clash of cultures, and the mysteries of the Otherworld.

Where other games skip the origins of your character, Legends of Avallen starts from the very beginning: you're an ordinary townsperson looking for an excuse to adventure. From those humble origins, you will quest out into Avallen, growing both in character and in power as you discover its magic. Soon you'll choose to follow a legendary path, learning the ways of the Bard, the Gladiator, the Magister, or many more. You will seek out lost relics, slay terrific beasts, riddle with the Gods, and change the fate of Avallen forever.

Avallen needs legends – how will you forge yours?

      Illustrations of a humble shepherd, a Vallic druid, and a Raxian slayer

What makes this game different? You do not begin as a great hero; instead, you have humble beginnings as a shepherd, blacksmith, scribe, or other base profession before rising up to become an adventurer with your friends.

Designed to be quick to pick up for new players and RPG veterans alike, Legends of Avallen uses regular ol’ playing cards instead of dice. Players flip cards from the top of the deck hoping that they'll match the colour of their attribute, with face cards and aces helping you get critical successes—or a critical failure if they don't match!

The system pushes gameplay away from the rules and into the players’ imagination, emphasising creativity, teamwork, and resourcefulness. Players that make the most of their surroundings, narratives, and set up team plays gain advantages (more cards to flip!) while failure leads to interesting decisions instead of the end of play.

Gamemasters can handily make adventures with scene templates, a mix-and-match monster maker, and Fate Cards that add tension, risk, and a ticking clock to scenes.

And of course, the Celtic-Roman inspired lore!

Legends of Avallen will release as a full coloured and illustrated rulebook containing a player guide, a gamemaster guide, and a lore guide. It will be approximately 150-250 pages in length, depending on what stretch goals are reached. It will be available as a PDF and hardback book through DriveThruRPG.

Legends of Avallen is set in an ancient world but is designed with a modern system

Exclusively available for this Kickstarter we are producing a full regular deck of Celtic themed playing cards featuring illustrations from the mythos of Avallen. These cards are not necessary to play Legends of Avallen but they will definitely look amazing and complement the experience!

Ace of Clubs featuring Llyr-Don the Ever Elder and Jack of Hearts featuring a Bwbach

We don’t know about you, but we love art and have a large collection of artbooks ourselves. We want to share that joy of art and the thought that goes into its creation, so we are also producing an artbook for Legends of Avallen. Exclusively available for this Kickstarter, it will show off the concepting and designs that create the world of Avallen.

Preliminary sketches and concepting for Eilir, the daughter of a minor Vallic noble who sided with the Empire. She gave up her birthright to follow visions that lead her to the path of the Druid.

The Pen-Coed clan worship the Ever Mother and revere the forests, building their hillforts around great oak trees.

Avallen, the main setting for Legends of Avallen, is a mystical island home to the Vallic, a divided Iron Age people. The Vallic clans each claim ancestry to a different kind of Fae, and historically have been in constant conflict. These clans are scattered across Avallen’s diverse biomes, worshipping gods that embody the lands—enchanted forests hosting mischievous Fae and druidic rituals; rolling meadows scattered with earthen fortresses and cattle-raiding Vallic queens; mountains shrouded in mist, hiding ancient sanctuaries and terrifying beasts, and so many more.

But let’s not forget the Otherworld, a place of legends that lies parallel to Avallen, it is the domain of their gods, the Ever Ones. It serves as the final resting place for the spirits of the dead, but also as the birthplace of creatures of myth such as the dreaded Ffieidd-Dra (Feithe-Dra) and the tricksy Fae. The Vallic people are cautious in their dealings with the Fae, and there are many stories of unwitting travellers who wander into this unearthly realm never to be seen again… or so rattled they never wish to speak of their experiences so long as they live.

Stepping into the Otherworld often leads to great fortune, as long as you can find your way back.

Magic is also bountiful on the island, running through it like a roaring river. It is powerful, flexible, and vicious; the average person would do good to avoid it most of their life. The Vallic have a natural affinity for the spiritual magic of the mystics, those that channel the natural forces of the Otherworld.

Avallen is not all nature, magic, and mysticism, though—a new kind of people have settled on their shores. This is the Raxian Empire, whose concrete buildings, urban living, taxes, and other cultural oddities made landfall on Avallen from the mainland to the south a generation ago. As the Vallic always have been, their response was divided. Some welcomed the Empire onto their land, while other clans put aside ancient rivalries to stand up against the invaders.

                Port Magnus, a Raxian town on the south coast of Avallen.

The arrival of a new culture also means a new way of looking at Avallen’s magic and gods. The Raxians consider the magic of the mystics far too unpredictable and dangerous; they much prefer the more logical spells of the mage, those that shape reality to their whim. And while the Empire exiled their own gods back on the mainland, there are a number of Raxians in Avallen willing to worship the Ever Ones. For strategic reasons, of course—worship means protection, favour, and influence over the Otherworld.

Your character will start with very little, the basic skill their Profession grants them and a pouch of coppers to their name. But as they venture across Avallen and have a hand in solving local problems, they’ll come to learn new talents. From their Profession school, a character will go on to select a base Class, and their world will be opened up to the arcane arts and styles of martial abilities.

Valens is an apprentice smithy and part of the first generation of Raxians to be born on Avallen.

With your adventure rising to more epic heights, so will your character’s abilities—as they begin to make a name for themselves across the island, your character will begin to walk one of the Legendary Paths, like the Druid or the Gladiator. These Paths offer even more powerful, more specialised skills and abilities that will change how you approach the game both in and out of conflict. Your talents certainly won’t go unnoticed by the residents of Avallen.

After his border town was ruined by war, Valens followed the path of the Slayer, vowing to hunt warmongers on both sides of the wall.

Finally, in the most legendary tiers of play, as your character finds mastery at the end of their Legendary Path, they will be forced to face their own flaws as they contend with the powers that be in both the mortal realm and in the Otherworld. Both your fate and Avallen’s will rest in the palm of your hand. How will you change Avallen forever? How will your character arc end? Will yours be a legend of redemption, or tragedy?

You can check out the Rules Summary here!

Legends of Avallen is designed to be approachable for new players and gamemasters alike, with over 20 of our playtesters having never played a TTRPG before! The game rules are introduced gradually as your characters advance, opening up new lines of strategy and deeper interactions for RPG veterans to master.

The simplicity starts right off the bat with character creation. You first determine your key personality traits, your starting Profession school—the job by which your humble townsperson makes a living—and finally, your score in four attributes—Vigour, Agility, Wit, and Spirit. That’s it! You’re ready to play.

When faced with a challenging situation your character needs to overcome, you will make a check with an attribute by turning over two cards from the top of the deck. Cards of the correct colour will add one to your attribute, while cards of the opposite colour subtract one. You'll be on the lookout for face cards and aces though as they add or subtract more, with faces worth two and aces worth three!

You’re not always confined to turning over just two cards, though. Interacting intelligently and creatively with your environment can grant you Advantages—extra cards to turn over. And when you’re at an advantage, you’ll take the two highest cards of all the ones you turn over, which means the better chance you have of achieving a critical success! Your allies can always help you in ways that give you Advantages, too. This will prove particularly useful for tough foes—it's better to work together to get one key hit in than have everyone chip away in futility.

Llysaera, Valens, and Eilir face off against a Draig. Overcome terrific foes using teamwork with a few decisive actions rather than many repeated ones.

But you can always find yourself on the flip side of a situation—at a disadvantage. In this case, you’d take the two lowest cards you turn over. While that means a greater chance of failure, there’s no need to worry—failure doesn’t mean the end of play.

When faced with failure, you have a choice: either sacrifice equipment or yourself to force a success, or choose to accept failure and take an Edge. Edges are face down cards, that can buildup through a scene, representing progress despite failure. You spend Edges when you like, adding them to your own checks or passing them around to your allies.

By the end of an adventure, your character and your companions will be exhausted, and their gear will be broken down, but they will be triumphant, and you will have many a thrilling tale to tell.

Don’t worry GMs, we've been thinking about you as well. While the players rise up to become legends, you are the hidden hero weaving the strands of fate to make it all possible. Legends of Avallen will come with GM tools that will help you focus on storycrafting, worldbuilding, and play.

Quickly create compelling content by adding your ideas to Scene, Quest, and Campaign templates that will be built to support Avallen lore and faction guides.

Find out what your players' characters care about most by raising the stakes with Fate Cards. Fate Cards represent risk and a ticking clock in tense situations such as sneaking through an Imperial camp, or exploring an opening to the Otherworld. When a player tempts Fate, the cards will decide if there are consequences.

Concept art for a Vallic town, get ready to bring it to life with your own NPCs and story hooks!

The system is designed so that so you can come up with NPCs and enemies on the fly, because let’s face it—the players always find a way to throw you a curveball! Use the personality system built into social encounters to come up with deep and interesting characters at a moment’s notice, and see how your players use those aspects to their advantage. And quickly slap together fiends, when your players unexpectedly wander into places they shouldn’t be, with the mix-and-match monster maker.

==================================================

Kickstarter campaign ends: Sun, September 20 2020 7:53 PM BST

Website: Legends of Avallen

#RPG #kickstarter #Legends of Avallen

[the-bloody-masquerade]

👀👀 mercurio for the character meme if youre still doing it?

(Ack! Sorry about the delay, but by god I am gonna finish these asks 😆) 

How I feel about this character:

Good man, the best, absolute treasure. Honestly my first playthrough, I roleplayed such a warm and friendly relationship between my Fledgling and Merc. He made quite the impression on me as a nice, calm, helpful man. I’d even just visit him sometimes and listen to all his new info. I roleplayed that my Fledgling found him calming to be around, and that Merc was basically his first mentor in undeath and showed him the ropes, a really positive influence on him. 😊

...And then I played Clan Quest Mod as a low humanity Gangrel woman and decided to antagonize him by insinuating I would tattle on his failure to LaCroix. 😬 And hoo boy, Merc can be RUTHLESS. I mean, even if it didn’t end up going the way he wanted it to, there was a reason this man walked into an entire house full of thugs and expected to be able to take care of it himself. 

I knew the beats of what would happen (and it like, physically hurt me as the player to be mean to him 😭) but I was NOT prepared for the cold glint in his eyes as he reveals his plan to not let you leave his apartment alive after you bring him the astrolite. Stone cold. 

And so I murdered him. 😅

But he was tough for my baby fledgling. I had to cheese the fight a little in order to take him down with the resources I had on hand. (And like, this is so early on in the game they gotta make him kinda easy, so I anticipate full strength, fully loaded Merc is a force to be reckoned with. 👀)   

Honestly I ended up reloading my file and replaying from my first interaction with him so that it wouldn’t come to that because I felt so bad. 

So yes, the man’s got a surprising harsh edge to him but if you stay on his good side he is a very lovely reliable friend. 

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

Honestly, not really anyone? If anything, I’ve had passing interest in Mercurio and LaCroix having a little something going on, but not shipping it in a super serious romantic kind of way. That idea’s kinda passed. 

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

We really do not see Mercurio interact with any character but the player. We do know from some context clues from Mercurio that he is familiar with Romero (”One ‘a my best customers”) so I like to think they’d maybe hung out once or twice. They’re both just kinda chill gun-enthusiast ghouls, so I imagine they’d have lots in common to talk about, but also the notion of the Camarilla Prince’s ghoul and the most prominent Anarch Baron’s ghoul (how scandalous!) just chilling together in the background having a beer, commentating on Kindred LA going to hell in a handbasket is amusing to me. 😆

My unpopular opinion about this character:

S’got a little bit of a face only a mother could love. (Could split wood with that chin of his 👀) Sorry Merc. 😅

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

I really wish we got to find out in canon what exactly was the trouble he got into in New York that caused him to flee to LA. It was serious enough that he wants nothing to do with police officers, lest they discover where he is. I wanna know the draaaama.

Honestly I would also just like to know his ghoul origin story too. Was he originally LaCroix’s ghoul? What were the circumstances around that? I’ve always found it strange that LaCroix and Merc are both from New York, and presumably LaCroix ghouled him like 30 years ago there. But now Merc is basically exiled from New York (for supposedly normal kine reasons,) and that happens to coincide with LaCroix leaving New York to go be Prince of LA. At the end of the day one of the best features of Bloodlines’ storytelling is actually all the things it leaves up for interpretation (especially nowadays it seems. It takes discipline not to just create elaborate backstories for every single character and vomit all that info up in the game) so I respect that these are things that we’ll never know for certain but like... I wanna know. 

#asks #pastelpasse #give me a character #memes #ask games #vtm #vampire the masquerade #vtmb #vampire the masquerade bloodlines #mercurio

[schrijverr]

I Wrote My Own Deliverance

Chapter 8 out of 10

Alexander Hamilton is reborn as Alex Hambleton. He is desperate not to make the same mistakes twice, but it seems he is stuck in the narrative, unable to get out. Familiar faces pop up all around him as he attempts to keep his previous life a secret and write himself out of the story.

On AO3.

Ships: none

Warnings: guilt, mentions all te deaths in Alex’s past and blackmail. Tell me if I missed anything or if you want me to tag something!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Washburn Pamphlet

by A. Ham

This pamphlet is written by Alex Hambleton to deny all rumors surrounding a sexual relationship with Professor George Washburn, Columbia University.

As much as I had vowed to myself not to end up here, I find myself once more having to publicly air my secrets to save myself. This might be news for people surrounding me, for I don’t go about telling everyone about my scandals of lives passed, it seems I have learned after all.

It is quite ironic that I am here once more for the sole reason of doing everything in my power not to be here.

And I could say that I am not.

Maybe I can claim that it is different, because I am denying the rumors and I am not in the wrong this time around. It is not even selfish motifs that caused me to reach for a quill, or, in this case, a keyboard.

But enough dancing around the topic.

I was aware that some people had thoughts and opinions about how I have gotten to where I am, but no one has had to audacity to come up and say them to my face with blackmail as motivation. Lets say I was quite surprised when James Richardson (no I will not be shying away from names) came up to me.

He told me that, unless I got Professor Washburn to pay him 20.000 dollars, the whole school would know how I fucked myself up the ladder by diving into bed with him each Sunday.

Seeing this was the first time I heard I was fucking him (Washburn had not been so kind to inform me, strangely enough), I was quite surprised. Although I have to admit that I cannot deny that I have been visiting the Washburn household each and every Sunday since the summer break, even going as far as to drive over to their summer home in Virginia.

Guilty as charged on that front.

Yes, I am confirming that this is true and I can understand how this feels more like a confession of guilt than the denial it is.

For you have to understand that you think in a too small time frame and in the wrong names. I have already said that I will not shy away from names in this pamphlet, so here I will drop the name of the person I have actually been seeing. I have been seeing George Washington, my General and President under whom I have served for many years back when I was known as Alexander Hamilton.

The time frame is not between the summer break and now, it is over two centuries ago when a great man saw my potential and helped me live up to it.

I am willing to go through the registration process to prove Professor Washington innocence, as well as my own, in the matter. I am also willing to do whatever is necessary to prove that I earned my spot in the accelerated track.

But this is the truth I can offer right now and I hope you will believe me on my word alone.

God knows I am aware that this sounds preposterous and outrageous, for why come out and tell you all now that I am a Founding Father when I could have done so without allegations that needed a story to be disproven?

Well, as everyone knows denying a rumor is the same as confirming it. And the truth is that I do not want to be Alexander Hamilton.

And why would I?

Why would I want to be that man. For all the musical tries to paint me as a hero, or misunderstood, I am so very aware that I did not deserve Elizas forgiveness. I know I threw away my shot the moment I didn’t say no (forgive the reference).

However, it is not just that. I do not want to be the man that did not come to his friends aid in France, I do not want to be the man that cared more about himself than his wife and the abused woman he took advantage off.

Alex Hambleton left Alexander Hamilton behind at birth.

I took this life, my second chance, to be better. I do not wish to walk the same paths and bring down those around me in my misery and mistakes.

Yet here I am.

I took the liberty of finding comfort in the one person who I knew would not share my secret, whom I’d be safe with as I always have been. The home where I could be the entirety of me, a combination of the Founding Father I used to be and the loudmouth student I am now.

And now it is not just me who has to pay the price when people don’t believe me. I tried so hard to write myself out of this story, to not make the same mistakes, but it seems that for all my trying I cannot stop being a death sentence for those around me.

My father still left, my mother held me again while she died, the moment I remembered who I was, was the moment I found my cousin dead. I did not want to believe that this would always be my life until the hurricane hit.

But there it was and it swept my hometown away with the waves and wind. My story is as set in stone and I, for all I claim to be an unstoppable force, cannot seem to move it.

Have you ever smelled death?

Have you ever looked around and seen bodies floating in the water and known that it was your fault?

It was my story that history forces to repeat, my story that caused the deaths of all those people and it is my story that forces a scandal into being and it is my inability to keep me from defending myself that makes me end up here.

Overwhelm them with honesty.

That is what my musical counterpart said and that is the footsteps in which I am walking once again. Though I hope that the small changes I have managed to make, will ensure that the results of my deeds will end up differently.

For those who knew me, I am sorry for the deceit. I hoped by not interacting, I would not pull you down with me once more. I do not wish my misfortune on you again.

But it is not for me that I seek your pity.

I am once more, begging strangers for kindness and understanding of my story. I hope you grant me this mercy and believe me, so that the one person who has always believed in me, no matter how much I did not, can keep his livelihood.

Let his story of success remain unchanged. Let him live his life in peace, knowing he did well and do not exile him in shame for crimes he did not commit.

Believe me not for my sake, but for his.

I could tell you stories of my past life in an attempt to prove myself to you. I could tell you about letters I wrote, words I said, people I loved and lost. I could tell you facts about myself that you can not verify, because I was the only person there to witness them.

But that will not do me any good.

So I write.

I write in the hope that you can find pity and understanding for the bastard, orphan, son of a whore that clung to the only rock, before the eye of hurricane had passed and he was swept up by forces of nature out of his control.

It is the only thing I can do.

I am not religious, yet here I am, praying on two knees to a God that has never listened to me, in the hope I have done enough to change the story I am stuck in.

However, I know my prayers have never been answered with anything but indifference.

Will my prayers be answered this time?

I do not count on it.

So, I will not ask you to pray for me. I will not allow myself to become a victim to lies and slander after I have worked so hard to be better than that person who was. I will not be threatened and blackmailed when I learned from my mistakes and I did not repeat that part.

Instead I ask you to pray for Washington as I am doing.

I ask you to pray for the kind soul that saw my potential and made sure that I could take one step closer to the future I wanted to achieve.

To pray for the man, who gave me shelter over the summer so that I would not be homeless. Pray for the man who gives me dinner one day of the week to ensure I do not starve. Pray for the man who let me read his recommendation letter an unnatural amount of times, so that I could ensure he only helped me based off the things I had achieved not his history with me, because he knew how important it is to me that I make my own spot in the world.

And I pray for his wife, Martha, whom I call Mama M, always have. Mama M, who has been there with open arms and soft words to fill a void that hadn’t been filled in this life or the last, since I was twelve.

I no longer care for your perception of me. You can keep your thoughts to yourself and I can move unaffected by hateful words that have followed me both lifetimes. I am used to it and I do not care about your words.

However, I do care for the two people who cared about me when no one else did. When no one else knew to care.

My shoes have always been worn out from the running I have to do to keep up. I work because I know I am too much of a minority to make it anywhere in the world if I don’t work thrice as hard as my peers.

Immigrant, Latino, bisexual, polyamorous, orphan, bastard.

These words have haunted me until I turned them into badges of honor and the only reason that is, is because I had a home to rest. A place to take of my shoes and get ready to face another day.

That place was the Washingtons home.

So, think of me what you want. Think me a liar who did not earn his place in the world, tell your friends how annoying I am and how you wish I had not made it through my hardships. I do not care for your opinion of me.

But keep them out of it, they do not deserve the slander of my presence for crimes they did not commit and rumors that are not true.

Be the change that prevents the tragedy of a history repeated.

.

Your obedient servant,

.

A. Ham

#RR writing #hamilton the musical #Hamitlon AU #hamilton #alexander hamilton #george washington #martha washington #james reynolds #tw: blackmail #tw: guilt #tw: death mention #tw: suicide mention