#good shit copypasta

[dangans-ur-ronpas]

by god tumblr polls are lawless places. i will vote as usual

#damn that shit got taken down?? crazy #good to know that some things never change. right dgr fandom? #anyways. hina won in my heart. that's all that matters to me tbh #if hina has a million fans im one of them. if hina has 5 fans im one of them. if hina has 1 fan thats me. if hina has 0 fans i am dead #idk how the rest of the copypasta goes but you get the idea #ramblings

[catboybitchboy]

Hey guys, did you know that in terms of monster and humanoid breeding, druids are the most compatible humanoid class for momsters? Not only are they generally healers, they are usually Medium, this means they’re usually large enough to be able handle monster dicks, and with their impressive Constitution Stats for higher HP and access to healing spells, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly nature based magic, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused druid would be incredibly wet or could cast a spell to make themselves wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the spells Thorn Whip/Entangle/Grasping Vine, Primal Savagery, Speak with Animals/Plants, Charm Monster, and Polymorph, along with that high Wisdom meaning they know about freaky shit, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their ability Wild Shape, they can easily turn into just about any creature you could possibly want. No other class comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your druid shake and beg. Druids are literally built for monster dick. Ungodly wisdom stat+high HP pool+healing magic means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more

#Vaporeon copypasta but make it D&D monsterfucking #fun fact I sent a screenshot of the original message I made of this to a friend #and it downloaded itself on her phone without her opening the app #so you know it's PRIME cursed material #nsft #nsftumblr #minors dni #nsft shitpost #I've been drawing a lot of my druid/cleric OC being a monsterfucker lately #but I don't wanna censor the good shit to post here

[histrionicscribbler]

CHATGPT LEARNED THE GOOD SHIT COPYPASTA?

#STOP THIS IS SO FUNNY #chatGPT #good shit #copypasta #peeb post

[blackbutlerfandomnerddomain]

CONTACT YOUR GOVERNMENT AND DEMAND A CEASEFIRE FOR PALESTINE

For Eu look up:

Voices in Europe for peace

For Usa look up:

US campaign for Palestinian rights

BOYCOTT FOR PALESTINE

FOA (Friends of Al-Aqsa) have organized a boycott in support of palestine. Here are the key companies to boycott:

HP (Hewlett Packard)

Coca-Cola

Israeli produce

We will be ending our call to boycott PUMA once the contract with IFA officially dissolves in 2024. Until then, we encourage you to continue boycotting PUMA products.

(Please help to spread the word by spreading this copypasta online and/or going to FOAs website where you can find posters to print out)

I'm not one to answer to political copypastas cause most times they either are a lot or they have misinformation so it's a awkward thing for me

BUT I will post and urge everyone to share this one because of the fact that not a lot of people know who's supporting who so I'll do it here

I'll leave a link here on what you can do peacefully and hopefully this will all end, cause honestly I don't think my heart can take any more divides like this

I know in hindsight a simple post on Tumblr might be enough for anyone, but the thought of hopefully we can have at least one year of zero war is something I want if or when I have kids of my own

#justice for palestine #boycotting #copypasta #be good people yall #also starbucks so be on that list cause of their own shit so #boycott starbucks

[jimbles-archive]

sign me the FUCK up 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌th 👌 ere👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my selｆ 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠＯOOＯOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit

do NOT sign me the FUCK up 👎👀👎👀👎👀👎👀👎👀 bad shit ba̷̶ ԁ sHit 👎 thats ❌ some bad 👎👎shit right 👎👎 th 👎 ere 👎👎👎 right ❌ there ❌ ❌ if i do ƽaү so my selｆ🚫 i say so 🚫 thats not what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ 🚫 👎 👎👎НO0ОଠＯOOＯOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ 👎 👎👎 👎 🚫 👎 👀 👀 👀 👎👎Bad shit

#good shit #bad shit #copypasta #meme

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

Shits Annual Old Inventory Sale (oops this shoulda been done during spring)

So with the arrival of our foster dog, my executive dysfunction has FINALLY taken a critical hit, which means I can get working towards shit I've been trying to deal with since February!

(ie killing old inventory and designing/releasing new pieces)

Doing a 30% off sale for these prints that are either a) going to be taken fully out of rotation or b) going for a bit of sabbatical before I redesign them to look significantly cooler/up to scratch with my current abilities

When these bad boys are gone, they are GONE. If you dm me for custom requests to buy a dead print I'll do so for you but the general listing will die when inventory is out. I've hyperlinked the shop listings to their bolded titles.

First Paragraph of My Immortal - now I THOUGHT I'd purged my home of these prints LAST year but there are STILL FOUR STRAGGLER SETS LEFT that I found underneath some old renn faire gear in pristine condition so. Here they are. On sale. I wish to be free of my curse

Naval Seal Copypasta - Ahhh old friend, it has been a journey, for you are a meme of such tenure older than even the porn ban and one of my first designs, but today I free you. There are 2 copies of the first page only and 9 copies of the full three piece set remaining, I submit you to the void

Man Hook Hand Hook Car Door - To be honest, it's 2023 and this one has never been a super popular piece in the first place, and with 7 prints left I thought it best to let her go for the sake of space

Penis - I put wayyyyy too much hutzpah designing this piece in the first place and getting prints of it done cleanly were weirdly difficult, so I'm just gonna be cutting and running on this piece - props to anyone who can find allllll of the dong jokes I've tried to weave into the piece tho! There's 10 prints left, and out of those one is a weird and fucked up misprint with which i will be including a free sticker just for funsies

Limerick Rolled- This is a sabbatical one, I designed it years ago with MUCH less experience than I have today re: text spacing and would like to put her under a redesign. There are only 2 of these bad boys left, and I'll try to get her redesign up with all the others when I release 'em.

Do Good Recklessly - Another sabbatical design, I'd like to neaten this one out and rework the illumination a bit more cleanly. There's 8 prints left in my supplies, and I'll also try to get the redesign out with all the new print designs I've got planned for this summer

#long post #boost #reblogs support the artist #calligraphy #memes #sale

[kineticpenguin]

So I finished the Fallout series

And that was a mistake.

You know how like, 2 episodes in I said "the only character anyone involved in this show seems to actually give a shit about is the Walton Goggins ghoul"? Yeah, that stays consistent for the whole duration. You know how people use "NPC" as an insult? Lucy is worse: she's a BethSoft Fallout PC. She just steps on out of that vault with generic do-gooder personality, and basically everything brought to that character is entirely from the person playing her, certainly not the goddamn writers. Let me be absolutely clear: this is not Ella Purnell's fault, she is acting her ass off. It's just the writers gave her such trash to work with and the only button they have on their keyboard is "well that just happened!"

It's almost as bad for Maximus the Hapless Brotherhood Dipshit (Aaron Moten) but not quite. The writers thought maybe they'd do a fakeout to make you question whether or not he's a good guy or not, and absolutely did not commit. Another character where the actor had to do their best with nothing.

So obviously Lucy and Maximus fall in love and... here's the thing. She's smitten from the moment he first shows up in power armor, calls him a "knight," even though she's supposedly up to speed on prewar history and knows T-60 armor when she sees it. Why she just got obsessed with this idea that this guy is a Knight and not a remnant of the US Army remains to be seen, but I'm pretty sure it's because Todd Howard hears "knight in shining armor" and gets a big fat chub and dreams of being carried off into the sunset.

I can't even say Walton Goggins steals the show as the ghoul Cooper Howard, because most of this show is actually really all about him. He is the actual protagonist.

Overall assessment, though? God, where is the copypasta about Fallout 3... ah, yes. It makes about that much sense. They retconned the NCR into a fragment and then finished it off out of what I can only assume is 14 years of pure spite from Todd Howard. Why? Because they want you to know that it seems that Vault-Tec is bad. Uh, very bad.

Vault-Tec's bad, huh?

HEY FRANK THIS GUY'S OVER HERE WATCHIN' AN AMAZON SHOW OVER HERE THAT SAYS THAT VAULT-TEC... IS BAD!

It's a show with nothing for everyone. It holds its cards close to the chest so non-fans won't understand what's going on, and shits all over existing canon which fans won't like.

And also it just sucks. The plot doesn't make any sense and the fight choreography occasionally achieves "acceptable" at best. Battlefields populate and depopulate and repopulate without explanation. There is no flow to the combat. There is a moment in the finale where banner-bearers with the BoS flag and the NCR flag just rush at each other. BECAUSE TROOPS ATTACKING BY HELICOPTER AND PEOPLE DEFENDING THEMSELVES FROM THEM, BOTH SIDES USING MACHINE GUNS, ARE SO WORRIED ABOUT BATTLE STANDARDS LIKE IT'S 1844

Fuck this show.

#fallout #amazon fallout

[ur-dad-satan]

Some obey me things I don't think we talk about nearly enough:

Lucifer's glasses

Luci's cute little half-framed glasses are so fucking hot on him holy shit. Like I know they're some basic rectangle glasses and all, but omg they fust fit his face so well and he looks so good!!

Beel's Tattoo

AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! Beel has a tattoo on his right arm and it is so fucking hot. Maybe I'm a slut for a mf with a tattoo (I am) and Beel is literally already so fine. I think people always forget that he has a tattoo because like NO ONE talks about it. Give Beel's ink some love.

This specific picture of Diavolo

I don't remember what event or anything this was from but holy shit. I haven't seen anyone talk about this Diavolo card. Everything about this card is so fucking hot. The red horns, the black nails, and especially that choker/harness thing with the chains he has on?? Ugh, I need him to-

This Mammon Halloween card

I don't know what it is about this man in this costume (I'm pretending his DOGS aren't out) but I need him so bad. Like maybe it's how fucking cute his hair is or how his eyes contrast his skin in most immaculate way. Maybe it's his gorgeous little smile or his confidence in his pose. I have no fucking clue what it is about this card, but it should be talked about more.

Barbatos in glasses

Just like Lucifer, Barbatos looks so fucking good looking already, but then he put on glasses?? Oh my fucking Diavolo. What's that copypasta from Instagram? No lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom, from the bathroom sink to the shower, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally, quadratic, exponential, logarithmic, while i gasp for air, scream and then upside down, on the floor, on the bed, on the couch, on a chair, being carried, against the wall, outside- etc. I need him

I'm not ashamed of anything, but I'm further away from doing a face reveal than ever now 💀

#obey me shitpost #obey me! #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me beel #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #addicted to fictional men #i need them #om lucifer #om mammon #om beelzebub #om barbatos #om diavolo

[happysadyoyo]

Friendly Reminder that Predstrogen/Avewy openly rape threatened a trans man <3

https://www.tumblr.com/gendiebrainrotreceipts/743065410048589824/

the fact you didn't even mask your sauce but linked to a radblr blog tells on the fact that it's radblr trying to instigate shit.

I haven't spoken much/at all about the avewy situation so idk why you're here except to try and stir up more intracommunity resentment and fighting. Given that you're clearly a radfem, that's kinda a given.

I, and many others, were already aware of Rita's transandrophobic remarks and stances. Literally going through Lou's own blog, whom is the person your radblr blog screenshotted, shows that while he was directly subjected to Rita's harassment, that he still believes that what is happening to her is not right. This is the stance of the majority of the trans people who use the transandrophobia word and tags.

To be clear, Rita is not a good person imo. From the little I've seen of her time on tumblr, she and I would've had some serious beef. That said, her situation has brought to stark attention something that black people, sex workers, and trans people have known about for awhile: tumblr does not give a shit about you and is rather terribly run.

The CEO's escalation of harassment to fucking xitter proves that we're as much in the hands of a tech manchild as xitter itself.

I've not been talking about Rita because the situation isn't news to me. Like I said, it's been talked about plenty before, but it's blowing up now partially because this is an attractive white woman who is being targeted by the CEO and it lines up with a sexual harassment copypasta being sent out to trans femme people on tumblr (second part is more of an extrapolation on my part). It's still in the limelight because said CEO has made it extremely easy to memeify his behavior.

tl;dr anon linked to a radblr blog to try and shit stir but did such a pisspoor job researching that if you just go to Lou's blog directly, you see him saying that just because Rita is a shitty person doesn't mean she deserves what's happening to her.

[simpletale-officiale]

farm sans!!

YIPEE!

farmer sans, he farm. hoohah! he likes to pretend to be a scarecrow, but he works with corn and cattle too, hoorah! his au is right next to the bar, so he likes to go there to drink, him and horror like to drink a lot! yay! farms personality is more laid back then the others, not reacting as cartoonishly to everything, likes eating and doing farm stuff, likes brewing his own beer and cooking some good ol meat on the stove, pretty much like your ol' uncle or grandpa out on the farm. says pardner and pardon a lot i got bored so, some miscellaneous outcodes and AU's are in the BAR SECTION

this is for general combo au asks as well as miscellaneous outcodes and aus combo asks? whats combo asks? for example, while you can ask the characters specifically associated with two seperate aus, like fell and swap, they answer the question, together! at the bar. but moving onto the characters specifically only askable in the bar starting with the focus of the drawing above, geno and paperjam! geno geno came from a AU where his brother tragically passed away, he wore his scarf in papyrus honor and became a sort of hitchhiker, one day he got beat up pretty bad when he found a grey, glitchy... block? he tried to lift it up and well suddenly he was in a dark glitchy space, bits and piece of his friends floating above him in pixel form he spent his time there for many, many years, eventually he sent out a signal through a similar glitchy block in an attempt to try to communicate with someone, this failed, but eventually he succeeded at escaping. alone in the multiverse, sans stumbled upon the bar, and decided to live there, never alone again! hes a little depressed, but less in the waa waa way and more in the soft kind of tired way. like for example he doesnt give a "hi!!" but a "hi......" paperjam pastel and error got a bit to.... errr, frisky lets say (no error doesnt have a penis nor nipples, but pastel does have the female parts, she can reproduce both sexually and asexually, the latter she can achieve through arousing means, but not necessarily inserting privates into eachother means. which gets her to be errrrr, pregrante) eventually she gives birth in a brutal manner, imagine the movie alien but instead of simple blood and whatnot your stomach slowly bulges until it explodes dropping a baby out. ink survived, but error had no interest in kids, ink didint really care, shes a hulking beast her instinct is to take care of the kid for a few months then leave it out in the wild to live but because paperjam is an interspecies baby hes a hybrid of error and inks anatomy so. he grows faster then a normal monster, but still has a moment as a child so, hes not ready for the big world yet, but ink didint know that, so she just dropped him off somewhere and left, paperjam grew up to be a sad child wishing for validation from his parents by any means, learned french to try to impress his mom. used to be a scam artist to try to impress his dads crime fascination, he only semi-succeeded with ink. sad, ambitious artist

404 and king sans

bio: 404 was born omnipotent, automatically more powerful then all the other simpletons. he would become aware of how through an alternative reality known as the prescratch timeline where that version of him speaks of what he was destined for. nobody believes him however and that bitch error keeps harassing me about talking shit well you werent talking at all when you were sucking me off you fucking whore i thought we would have a fucking future togheter but you just a fucking slut fuck you never talk to me again bitch likes: chaos, delinquency, anarchy, NOT following the rules, 100 gecs (the one with the stupid horse), being powerful, super transformations, hyperpop, chains, gold, copypastas, big hot strong men that could absolutely penetrate me hard, 100 gecks (literally, i have 100 of them as pets and its awesome!!!), flexing, being totally dripped out, colors associated with errors, busting it down (gay kind not cool kind) dislinks: order, rules, politics, leaders, having to follow instructions, horror sans from the evil guys fuck you you stole my place on that group which im not that upset about anymore after realising they all suck anyways but i still hate you because you refuse to actually fight and keeps saying random quips everytime youre on screen like actually shut the fuck up, gex, women because im severely femalephobic and extremely homosexual so they terrify me, error (cheater and liar dont ever trust him with anything), ink who stole my man with her fuckin cursed woman parts and apparently in the prescratch timeline everyone calls her mommy????? im bouta yiik out man yeesh omnipotent brat with a big ego king sans a sans who believes himself to be the king of the multiverse, goes around ranting about how hes the greatest and how everyone has to BOW before him, most of the time just gets called slurs and has beer bottles thrown at him wears a comically large crown made of cardboard, plastic, and 5% metal. speaks like an old englishman

paper crane a bunch of sanses got ripped to shreds like paper! oh no! and then they got glued together again, hoorah! but the pieces were all mixed up so they just glued it into one single entity hoo...rah? cheerful, a little... soulless. means good, wants a soul, wants to feel alive again.

horror part of errors gang, but since errors gang hasnt been unlocked yet hes gonna be in this category for now. coming from an au where the core has a malfunction and undyne and alphys asked him to fix it, sans the mechanic errr kind of just slacked off, ate a sandwich took a nap wasnt really paying attention to the subject. eventually after 5 months of sans doing nothing alphys and undyne snap and hit sans in the head with a metal pipe, smashing his skull and sending him flying into the waterfall-snowdin river, after washing up ashore in snowdin, he kind of just forgot his whole interaction with undyne and alphys, and even if he did, he probably doesnt care, same personality as simpletale, but hes slightly more brain damaged so hes a bit more clumsy and endearing. seems menacing at first but hes harmless, beloved by everyone. loves getting wasted at the bar with farmer

#horror #horrortale #paper crane #simpletale #simpleverse #error 404 #404 sans #king sans #aftertale #paperjam #farmer sans #bar #pub #alcohol #undertale

[yooniesim]

So, I may be a day late, but I still want to make a little post for Simblr Gratitude Day 💜

To start off, my memory is pretty bad, so I just know I'm gonna miss tagging people... and honestly, there's way more people on here I'm grateful for than tumblr's limit of 50! So I'm starting out addressing everyone.

To everybody that likes or reblogs my posts, sends comments or asks, shares their sims with me, or uses my cc: I love you. Yes, you! I may be bad at answering back sometimes, but I cherish every interaction I get- a lot of the times they have me kicking my feet and giggling, or sometimes I'm barking and scaring my cat. Asks really make my day and even when I don't reply so fast, they warm my heart. Asks I've gotten on here have genuinely helped me in my dark times, and renewed my faith in this community as a whole, because some of you are just so freaking amazing and kind. Especially now with everything I've been going through, sims and being here has remained a comfort for me because of you all. Even if there's speed bumps from time to time, I truly believe there's more good here than bad, and y'all should be proud of yourselves and your capacity for endless kindness. Thank you!

Now, I'm going to address a few specific precious people I'm grateful for.

@wastelandwhisperer - Moon, my precious mom friend, I adore you. The joy, comfort, and hilarious memories you give me can't be understated. You deserve all the love and light in the world.

@neverheresims - God's eepiest soldier, what would I do without you? Thank you for always being genuine, reliable, and a true friend.

Vi - Thank you my sheriff, my paggro detector, my master of copypastas, my right hand catboy. Even though you're untraceable, I couldn't leave you out. I love you!

@divinedionym - Thanks for always being straight with me and taking NO shit. I truly admire you and your attitude, friend.

@dyoreos - We may not both be active at the same time anymore, but I still think of you, friend! You've always had my back and I'll always have yours.

@nucrests - I'm so grateful to be your friend, and every time you share your beautiful content and gorgeous sims with me, it really makes my day. I adore you.

@cinamun - You probably don't know this, but in certain times when I was feeling low, your comments and kindness really lifted my spirits and made me feel like I belong. You're a lovely person and deserve all the love you receive, friend.

@woosteru - You won't see this bc you're retired so I can be sappy as I want, so there!!! I adore you, your sweet personality, and your sense of humor that matches just right with mine. (Nobody tell them)

@superflare - Lulu, you're an incredibly creative and intelligent person. I can tell you're going to go far in life and do great for the world. Be proud of yourself, always!

@fiftymilehighclub - Thank you for always being yourself, Manda! You're such a hardworking person that's kind but firm with your opinions and what matters to you. You're amazing.

@nicatnite88 - Tay, you're someone that's always empathetic, understanding and kind, yet hilarious at the same time. I look up to you as a person and admire your skills as a parent.

@pluto-sims - What do I say about Eli? Despite being unfortunately bri*ish, you've exceeded expectations in all other areas as a friend. I genuinely appreciate your presence and kindness in my life.

@bloody-soda - As one of my longest and dearest mutuals, peachy, my love for you can't be understated! I think of you whenever I see cute meme pics lol and you're so lovely as a person.

@wubblesgonefishin - Beautiful wubs, you're such a wonderful person with so much love to give! My day brightens every time I speak with you and I'm so glad you're back.

@toastie-sim - Meg! One of my few brain cells, I don't know what I'd do without you! You're so helpful all the time and unbelievably patient. I appreciate you.

...Phewph. Now that that's o- wait. You thought I was done??? Nuh uh, the king of long ass texts posts is not done that fast. Here's some more beautiful people I'm grateful for and love seeing grace my dash 💜

@simandy @void-imp @therichantsim @adelarsims @marsosims @shysimblr @1-800-cuupid @xldkx @xiuminuwu @hexcodesims @cassymblr @lotusplum @rebelangelsims @denzellion @strawberrylattesims @anachrosims @cowplant-snacks @fierce-trait @simanin @ghostwoohoo @llama-head @aghilasims @janjumjam @jellyfish-tea @bbdoll @puppycheesecake @mwvwv-sims

#ceci speaks #nonsims #text #simblr gratitude day #im telling u i missed ppl and im sorry #but just know i love u all!!!

[wigglebox]

Not a copypasta do you know any good resources for knitting I have been trying to learn and I don't understand what I'm supposed to do even though there are instructions 🫠🫠

Sure nonny! I'm more experienced with crochet but I do have my favorite places to go for knitting stuff lol.

So I'm not sure if you're right handed or left handed — if you're left handed just come back and tell me because learning how to knit as a lefty is a little harder, only because you have to read patterns a little differently.

But, to get started, Very Pink Knits is my favorite youtube channel, she's really great at showing how to do stitches. She's how I realized I was accidentally knitting twisted stitches for three years!

This is her YouTube channel.

She has MANY videos on how to do certain techniques for knitting and how to get started, even how to cast on!

Scrolling through, looks like she's starting on Crochet tutorials as well!

But she explains things very well and has a good tutorial lighting set up and everything. However, if you don't find her videos helpful, just keep typing in stuff into youtube and see what video tutorials are out there because there are many! Yarn companies, pattern writers, etc etc, they all have youtube channels. And, in the future, if you pick a pattern and find yourself getting stuck, a lot of the time the pattern maker will have a youtube video for you to follow to help.

I'm useless as making a video to help get started because I'm left-handed and I primarily crochet lol.

ALSO: SIGN UP FOR RAVELRY

There are communities, you can see notes people make on patterns to see if they had any issues you had, you can sign up to test patterns once you're getting good enough, and a lot of patterns are on there and you can really filter what you wanna find even down to the kind of yarn you have and how much of it you have. You can also save them as favorites and when you buy the pattern you can keep it in your library for safe keeping!

But here are some things to know that sometimes they don't tell you in these beginner videos:

When buying your knitting needles, don't use plastic for plastic yarn. If you're getting acrylic yarn, using plastic needles won't provide a kind of smooth working motion you need. Metal needles for plastic yarn. Slippery yarn like bamboo yarn or cotton or baby alpaca/merino wool can go on wooden/plastic needles. If they go on metal, you may have some issues keeping tension. If you google what kind of needles you should buy for what yarn you can also find this advice!

Buy shit yarn to practice with. If you have a Dollar General around you or anything, assuming you're American, get some of that yarn to first practice on. It's polyester/acrylic but it's so cheap that it's good to practice on. Don't get black! Not when you're first learning!

Plastic/budget yarn is okay to make things out of, and don't let any knitter try to tell you otherwise. There's more forgiveness in the crochet community when it comes to yarn type because we use so much of it and make bigger things than knitted things usually are. Therefore, we can't always afford the big fancy wool and baby yak yarn blahblahblah. So don't let anyone shame you for using yarn from Joann Fabrics.

When you're done with your knitted project, BLOCK! Always block your things, even if you just make a hat or a scarf. It helps with the drape and it helps with being able to see the stitches you just made! If you're using plastic yarn, buy a handheld steamer [mine was like $30 on Amazon], rust-free pins, and knitting block foam squares. You don't have to buy them specifically for knitting like you can buy children's foam play squares, but i like the ones specifically for knitting bc they have 1-inch x 1-inch grids on them so i know how much to stretch my blocking out lol. There are tutorials online for blocking. It's tedious sometimes, but it makes a world of difference and IMO, as you're learning, always make a habit of blocking your stuff. I didn't do it consistently until recently and boy oh boy

Always make a gauge swatch. Once you're starting looking for patterns to make, you're going to see stuff that's like: 10 rows x 10 rows stockinette stitch = 4 inches ... or something like that. And sometimes they'll tell you whether or not your gauge should be blocked before measuring. If you get into crochet this is even more crucial because crochet is less forgiving when it comes to measurements especially after you wash and block stuff. I made a cardigan once and didn't gauge swatch and essentially it'd look great on a woman who is 7 feet tall but not so much on me lol.

That also being said, if your gauge is off, sometimes you have to change your needles. It depends on how tightly you knit. I am a tight knitter so I usually have to go up a needle size lol. If you're struggling, google how to correct your gauge and it'll tell you what to do if you have too many rows going up or going left to right. Or, too little rows.

WEAVE IN YOUR ENDS! With crochet, people have found workarounds [even tho i still think weaving in ends with crochet is vital] but it's really vital when it comes to knitting because the fabric is thinner and it's more unforgiving and it's always good to have some extra yarn stashed away between the stitches just in case you ever needed to go back and adjust something. there are videos out there on how to weave in your ends without them showing in knitting. It's tedious if you've done a lot of colorwork especially but it must be done!

Be gentle with yourself - knitting can be hard to learn at first bc you're learning how to work both hands essentially at the same time. Same with crochet. Knitting takes a little longer because your stitches are smaller so use knitting as a meditative practice and just get in the zone.

When it comes to knitting, I find that working on circulars helped me with my hand-eye coordination and my tension. However, that may not be as easy for you to start off with. And yes you can knit flat pieces on circular needles. The weight of the straight needles sometimes made my hands tired. However, there are tutorials out there on how to get started on both! Also, circulars are great for teeny tiny decreases in the round like for sleeves or socks — instead of working with double-pointed needles which are my nightmare lol.

But — you're not gonna be making a sweater likely as your first thing so here are some patterns that I think would be simple for a beginner knitter!

You will be making a lot of squares first lol. But it's good practice, and it's good to do! These are all free:

CARON SIMPLE KNIT OMBRE BLANKET SCARF

I have this yarn and it's very lovely, and the scarf itself is very simple to make and will be good, especially to learn stockinette stitch!

LILY SUGAR'N CREAM GET LOOPED KNIT DISHCLOTH

This is a cotton yarn available at most craft stores. This is a free pattern and you're essentially making garter stitch squares. I actually recommend this first because garter stitch is essentially the first stitch you learn, THEN you learn stockinette. The different being stockinette is when you learn how to purl. Garter stitch is when you're just doing the knit stitch on both sides so you get the little wavy-looking thing.

SEAFARING SCARF

This looks cozy lol and it'll help you with practicing ribbing! And this one is FANCY ribbing called fisherman's rib! This is a little more advanced but they have videos in the pattern explaining things like "knit one below."

If you're done scouring the internet for free scarf patterns and have looked at tutorials on how to work in the round, here are some simple and basic tops you can make [I'm unsure how you like to dress or your gender or your presentation so I'm linking sweaters that are on the more feminine side just because it's what I have in my list lol]

GINGERBREAD SWEATER

This is a basic, simple, top-down raglan sweater. Raglan sweaters are ones i prefer to do lol i like the slant at the arm.

CLASSIC RIBBED BEANIE HAT

I make these so much especially when I don't know what to do with my yarn lol.

If you want to start getting a crack on triangle shawls, here's a good free first foray you can try!

THE AGE OF BRASS AND STEAM KERCHIEF

This has some fancy eyelets but they're not intimidating! I promise!

And here's another basic raglan sweater you can try!

WARM-UP SWEATER

Again, another basic, no fancy stuff sweater that is good to begin with when learning how to make sweaters.

---

I know this is really long, I'm sorry nonny lol.

My favorite knitwear designer is Andrea Mowry who you can find here. She has basic patterns and more complicated ones. I find her patterns very easy to follow and she comes up with fantastic ideas. I was very close to finishing the bee sweater once lol. Find your Fade is a BIG one everyone made but that one is a commitment both of time and money so...

But yeah! If there's anything else I can help you with let me know! I'm more experienced with crochet now since I've been doing it longer and made more things, so if you ever wanted to venture into Crochet I got even more stuff for you xD

Woof this got long. I hope some of this helped!

#long post #knitting #crafts

[sailorsenshishitposter]

Liquid Snake x Reader

Warning for language but it's part of the copypasta. Also British stereotypes in case that offends you.

Liquid Snake

You have a thing for bad boys, are attracted to English accents or you just have a massive inferiority complex.

First Date:

You are a soldier working on Shadow Moses Island. Your partner has just taken Solid Snake to a locked cell after bring tortured by Ocelot, now leaving you and the blonde alone together. He turns your way and you try not to shit your pants Johnny style. He looks at you, then places a palm on your shoulder. "Oi mate, I think ell be outta it fo' a while. Care fo' a spot o' tea?" You're not really left with much of a choice so you follow your boss.

You eventually reach a cafeteria for the staff. Liquid dumps all the coffee out of the pot and begins to fill it with earl grey tea. "You hungry?" You shake your head. You couldn't possibly eat after seeing what the man had for himself on a tray. "Nothing like good ol' beans an marmite!" He then grabbed the pot and drank it all, scalding his throat. "That was bloody good, that it was!" Was your superior some kind of freak?

He then went on a long speech about french infants or something? You didn't really care and started to zone out. You didn't realize you had fallen asleep until you woke up to liquids final words. "And next thing I no, the bloke is ripping out me vocal cords. That's wot I get for workin' with a red head who got his fashion sense from a BDSM club." Just then you heard a noise. !

It was none other than Solid Snake, having made his escape. Liquid was furious. "BRUV, HOW DID YOU ESCAPE!" His twin walked closer. "That's not important. I just came by to tell you that you're wrong. You can't download UNO for Xbox." Liquid then felt his veins begin to twitch. "Everyone has UNO dipshit. It came fo' free with your fucking Xbox!" His twin then gave him a smirk. "I didn't get it, I have the oldest Xbox known to man."

"No you don't, I bought mine on day one you fucking tard."

.....

"Well, mine didn't have it." He was determined to prove Solid wrong. The two men soon ended up in a screaming match, various swears tossed back and forth. "I DON'T FUCKING HAVE UNO MOTHERFUCKER!"

"GO TO IT IN THE ARCADE AND YOU'LL BE ABLE TO DOWNLOAD IT FO' FREE, YOU DUMB WANKER! IT'S A FUCKING CARD GAME, THEY DON'T EVEN CHARGE PEOPLE FO' IT!"

"I DON'T HAVE TWO, I DON'T HAVE THREE, I DON'T HAVE FUCKING FOUR, I DON'T HAVE SEVEN, EIGHT, NINE, TEN, OR ELEVEN!"

"YOU DON'T KNOW A GODDAMN BLOODY THING, IT'S FUCKING UNO, IT'S FREE-" Suddenly Liquid stopped. He raised his hand to his chest and gave out a weak cough. He then toppled over, a result from the FOXDIE. "Damn. Never seen someone get so angry that they straight up had a heart attack. Colonel, the plan worked. I'm bringing Meryl back and then we're going to pound town. Just don't expect me to call her afterwards." You couldn't hear the other voice on the codec call but you had a hunch that it was something along the lines of "Wait, what?-"

Shit. Well now you were out of a job. You went to the lab and found a computer already logged in. It was time to start looking for shady jobs on Craigslist again.

#mgs #metal gear solid #mgs x reader #Metal gear solid x reader #liquid snake #Liquid snake x reader #Mgs eli #Mgsv references #psycho mantis mentioned #shitpost #cursed #British #stereotypes #solid snake #Ocelot mentioned #you have uno #cockney accent #marmite #Snake and Meryl mentioned together at the end to a very confused Colonel Campbelll

[snackbyte]

my favorite things about mlynar nearl

Copypasta of my thread from Twitter bec I like the Nearls a lot and they’re some of my fave characters ever.

I wrote this thread before I got the chance to read Obscure Wanderer (I have now), but I REALLY like how he was written before that point. (MN & NL + his lines)

HG ACTUALLY knows what a cynical former idealist would look like. He's a tragic character and incredibly interesting to me.

He scoffs at what Maria, Zofia, and Margaret do because he doesn't believe in symbolic change or small movements anymore, and there's a real pain knowing it that comes from the people closest to him.

But at the same time, it's a reminder of his own personal failure, and a reminder of how much he's lost to a completely messed up system rigged against him. His answer is realistic for him, a grounded but cynical way of changing it while biding his time.

He STILL wants change, but he's broken. No longer an idealist, just trying to make strides for reform while playing the system's game, not realizing he's been consumed by it. So he shits on anyone else not playing ball just because he stuck himself in it.

The man literally took 10 years of his life keeping his head down against everything he hates, while also distancing himself and breeding resentment for everything he loves. He's such a GOOD cynical character.

Because among ALL the characters in Arknights, he /understands/. More than Ch'en who only begins to realize it after Chernobog. That you can't just punch a broken system in the face.  Even with sword and strength, he can't kill abstract, systemic ills with physical means.

But still, he fights.

Because while he is but a broken man, a shadow of a knight that could have been, a shell of the Nearl family's former glory—

He is not defeated, and his light has not been extinguished. He still hopes.

What a lovely, flawed character.

#arknights #mlynar arknights #mlynar nearl #nearl #margaret nearl #maria nearl #zofia nearl #blemishine #whislash #mlynar

[ask-zach-and-xania]

yo are we connected??

"Uhm, hello? Hello Hello? Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first night-" "XANIA SO HELP ME GOD, IF YOU MAKE THIS SERIOUS POST INTO A FUCKING COPYPASTA-" "FINE, FINE, UGH YOU ARE SUCH A MOODKILLER ZACH" "I know i am, but you know that i am more serious than you, you killing spree of an exe" "Do you wanna go right now?" "No not really "Good" "ahem Sorry for that y'all, so uh is this-OH SHIT THIS THING HAS BEEN RECORDING THE ENTIRE TIME FUCK" Xania seems to be laughing his ass off in the background while hanging from a vine from the ceiling The image that was taken was from Xania and Zach posing but Xania fell right after as you heard Zach laugh a bit before being chocked by Xania (ASKS ARE OPEN, CURRENTLY AVAILABLE ARE ZACH AND XANIA) (when will i get some screen time?) (i don't know OZ, i don't know we can only wait for them to discover the puzzle)

#send asks #ask blog

[autoandro-meda]

already sent this to a couple of blogs that aint answered me yet, need someone to acknowledge and praise a bit. im so desperate to start my medical transition that i lifted a couple bottles of testosterone supplements from my local pharmacy. i hope it does something, anything for me. im hoping.

Hey anon. Kink gloves off im gonna talk to you real serious right now.

Ill just rip the bandaid off: that is not going to do what you want it to do (transition you). Testosterone supplements either do one of two things; decrease estrogen production on a very small level/ridiculously high dosage, or increase existing hormone production. Unfortunately, since we typically dont produce testosterone already, taking a t supplement does not work akin to hrt. Im sorry to tell you.

I was barred from HRT for a good while due to my families rejection of it, my healthcare not covering it, and only having 4 clinics in the state that would actually treat me (despite having branches all over the state.) It was miserable, i was misgendered everyday and mostly gave up on binding or doing anything. Anon if youre not doing good right now doing risky things out of desparation isnt going to help you. At best youll stressed yourself over something you now have to hide and at worst you get caught.

I do not know your situation but here are some broad things i can suggest to hopefully try and help you out/relieve any amount of dysphoria:

-im not sure if youre in the states and if so where but plannedparenthood is the usually referenced for a reason. I got to my HRT appointment and had no insurance and not enough money. So they lied about some stuff to get my fees waived. If it is legal where you are at least google you locations treatment pages/insurance options.

-there are simple forms of voice training you can do that do help lift spirits a bit. Im sure theres tons on youtube but my usual practice was cycling through specific syllables at the lowest pitch i could possible for a bit. So like, for the duration of a shower id be prattling off strings of noises like "Beng Bong, Heng Hong, Seng Song.." or "ka-ku-ki-ka-ku-ke-ka, ha-hu-hi-ha-hu-he-ha" trying tk do it in routine. You can laugh, i hope its funny.

-im not saying go hyperdrive workout routine but if you have the ability to be a bit more active some how i suggest it. I took a hour walk most days before i could start transitioning and it didnt change much but it made me feel more confortable.

-if working out is something you would wanna look into theres a ton of options for high protein foods/drinks that do help with muscle development (i used to be more into em when i started my transition.) Check if theres a place by you that does whey protein smoothies im so goddamn serious they taste so good and are the main reason i have Something Resembling Biceps

-i am behind a screen. I have a sort of idea of how i come off to my followers but take it from me i am 1 year into my hormones and its not been a very massive change at all. I look almost the same in my comparison pics, i hardly have facial hair, you realize quickly this is gonna take time. Which i mention as to say your transition will always be waiting for you and while right now it may seem out of reach or impossible i promise that will someday change.

-tip from me: dont shit where you eat. If youre gonna shoplift dont go to a pharmacy thats local to you, try to go somewheres you dont frequent. But for real stop stealing dick pills bro.

-i am taking this ask in good faith because i dont want to potentially shut this anon out, but if this is a troll or copypasta youre a piece of shit.

-if not, sorry about above, i hope you know you have a place with trans men who would love to support you in this difficult process because we know. Its alright.

-you gotta keep trying. With love.

#ask tag