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#i can't help but be terrified that my loved ones are going to die on me
astrxealis · 4 months
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dear gods i adore horror tbh but i am way too sensitive to it
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#idk how to describe 'sensitive' rn i'm dying in the head i should be asleep but Man!!!!!#i search up tons of horror stuff for funsies. movies uhh creepypastas stories real life events etc. fun!#BUT it freaks me out wayyy too much. bcs i really don't deal well w Those feelings of paranoia.#my imagination too good i was scared at night going to sleep bcs i'd imagine what to do if an intruder came in from the bedroom door#or bathroom door and think of how i'd escape Death.........#Did Not Help my area before was kinda yk. chillax. chillax meaning grassy tree-sy backyard overgrown trees#old-ish in a filipino chill neighborhood that isn't very fancy ?????? idk.#and the fact one time my dad almost died and someone standing close to him Did die so. haha. traumatized from that.#I WASN'T THERE..... but i rmbr my dad coming home and the news absolutely terrified me. anyway!#wow... rambling on tumblr at 3 and a half am... Nostalgic.#anyway yeah i love love love horror stuff but i am !!! so bad w them !!! like jesus christ i adore resident evil and bloodborne#is my whole bloodline. or something. but i can't even watch my twin kill 1 zombie in a re game Demo (she can't do it either)#and i can only make it to killing the first monster in bloodborne and explore a tiny bit where there are still no enemies. god.#AAAGGGGHHHhhhh ... and the first point of horror in omori then i stop playing for months...... even tho i rlly wna play more :((#2024 ........ cmon... i will try to overcome my fears more.#i've improved somewhat at least! ...from when i was younger. like. man. i could never stay in night-time in games ever.#ffxv? nah i always have to travel at morning. only when i got strong enough that daemons were nothing to me did i stop#getting scared. ouuughhh... and i always try to be stealthy in games........... for many reasons ofc but 1. Scared#okay i shut up now. apollo rambles of tonight: done and over!
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queerstudiesnatural · 8 months
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bunnyb34r · 5 months
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I know I should just block (and not OPEN) tags and posts ab '24 but my brain is stupid and likes to be informed even if it makes me worse
#marquilla#im not even joking when i say this next election makes me wanna kms so bad. im fucking terrified and i feel like we already know what's#gonna happen. not bc people arent voting or organizing i mean bc of how far the right has gotten and how angry they are that a#dem won so theyre gonna show up in droves and it's like god i wish we could idk have some safegaurds in place??? like oh idk you#incite an insurrection you Can't run for president?? but also that wouldnt fully stop shit bc florida has its own neo nazi running and#theres more behind him in the wings. but like idk man i just get so fucking suicidal thinking ab the future#and my drs. are like well then dont look at the news??? 'i sure dont' mkay thats great (not) but um i CAN'T not watch bc i need to#be informed i need to know. and they're like well then stop worrying ab it til election day?? LIKE THAT HELPS#so i just dont bring it up. and i just spiral and have breakdowns in the shower and think ab making a will and shit yknow normal stuff#bc this is fine! just dont engage! stop worrying it's like a year away! it MIGHT get better! idk Join in your community then??#like yes yes thats a start but with what fucking energy when im bedbound most of the time im not working and that doesnt stop these fascist#s like me helping the community garden would be good for the community and probably my mental health in general BUT that doesnt deal with#the actual fear that makes me wanna Kermit#like it really fucking feels like all i can do is pray and hope god somehow intervenes (rapture anyone?) and that things do go well and#that the outright outspoken nzis don't win but like I really just wanna die man#i know the outcome more than likely will not directly affect my life bc im white. cis passing. and can go back in the closet regretfully#but like that doesnt reassure me any bc i have friends and loved ones and generally just give a shit ab other people and how this WILL#affect them directly and that terrifies me. it really feels like we cant ever have a moment to just exist yknow??#idk man i just wanna die bc im so scared haha how fun (: how normal (: this is fine. everything is fine.
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neil-gaiman · 2 months
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Hi Mr Gaiman, I hope your day is going well.
I can't say I'm looking for anything other than the comfort of talking to someone I don't know, and I apologize that for some unknown reason you are the only 'wiser older being' I can think of other than God. I'm 16, and because of forces outside of my control, I don't know if i can continue living normally. My family is loving, I am safe in my home, I currently have it better than most of the people in my country, I am not suicidal, but I'm terribly scared. Every time I watch the news or see my parents/teachers talk to each other, I feel this unexplained sensation that my life is getting shorter and shorter.
Mr. gaiman, I feel like I'll never get to finish high school. I'll never get to visit my grandparents' old house since the town evacuated. My aunt and her family are still up in the north, they send us videos every time they see rockets in the sky, and I debate sending 'goodbye' and 'I love you' one more time just incase. I'm terrified for them, for the people under the rubbles of their homes, for the people in foreign places that still don't know if they'll live, for the kids with no parents, for parents with no kids. I remember being nervous to talk to my friends about what we'll do when we go to the army in a few years, but as long as we keep in touch we're sure we'll be alright. I remember what I wanted to be when I'll grow up, I wanted to move, get an apartment in Porto Fino or go to meet my uncles in Viana, and translate books.
I remember it was the last few days of holiday vacation before it started, I remember it was still warm outside, and I still possessed the privilege to live.
Mr. gaiman, these days I'm learning that while I get to be luckier than most by simply being alive, I will always feel just one alarm sound away from sharing the same fate of my great-grandparents. From a young age I've seen black and white pictures of them, and so many others, and was told: 'they were here, they were alive, and you get to live the dream they died for'. I don't want to die on unfulfilled dreams.
I apologize for making you deal with this, but I want to be remembered by someone from outside who will get to live longer than me, or so I hope.
I'm 16 and a half. My brother just turned 11. I'm about to fail the test I have tomorrow. My tattoo just fully healed - the flowers symbolize undying love. I learned English on my own. I collect records with my dad. I study American history. I love your books. I bake when I feel down. I am alive. I if I die I hope it will be in a bomb shelter.
All I can wish you now is luck, good fortune, and the hope that you and your loved ones survive and that the world heals. I hope your generation helps heal the mess that previous generations have left you in.
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K follow me Astarion just sees tav like loving on children wherever they go and hes like?????
And tavs like ive always wanted my own child but i didn't wabt to ask you with every
This sends poor starion into a crisis does he was children how many
I think I have followed you. Let's see!
So for this one we got a lil time jump, ambiguous and vague setting and timelines with game spoilers present. M/F pairing because that is my go to and pregnancy is mentioned. Vampiric pregnancy also so there is some weirdness there (i made it up no idea if it's dnd accurate). Vague Tav backstory of a wonderful mother and going off to become a cleric.
~
Astarion was well used to your antics by this point. You had a severe lack of instincts linked to self-preservation, which led to a consistent pattern of doing, frankly, stupid shit. Stupid, but kind. Nothing that Astarion hadn't adapted to, after nearly two years of being attached at the hip you became pretty attuned to your lover's personality.
He could even go as far as to say that he had grown to love your annoying predilection for pious morality. Perhaps he loved talking you out of certain virtuous dangers more, but still. He appreciated who you were, he adored who you were. But Astarion was no saint, despite his insistence on attaching himself to one.
Which is exactly why he was far from amused when you signed him up to babysit a couple of brats. All for acquittances he barely cared about.
But you at least had the good grace to look guilty, "I didn't mean to! But she looked so tired and she said their anniversary was coming up and it's not like we got anything for their wedding-"
That was a nice try, one that Astarion wasn't falling for, "We didn't know of their existence when they got married darling. Just because I can't remember their names doesn't mean you can trick me."
"I'm not trying to trick you!" You whined, arms crossed as you pouted. It sure felt like a trick, especially when Astarion knew that you were well-aware how easily he fell for your sulking. Adorable little monster that you were, "It's only three kids and a baby for one night, it won't be that bad! You don't even have to help-"
Astarion rolled his eyes as he sat next to you on the bed, "I didn't say I wouldn't help."
That seemed to do the trick to get the pout off of your face. You perked up immediately, looking at him like you couldn't quite believe it, "Really?"
"Yes, really," Astarion sighed as you tugged you closer. Sure he liked to bitch, but he really would do anything for you. Even extremely annoying things like this, "I'm not going to sit back and feed you to the wolves."
"They're not wolves! The oldest is barely five," You laughed as you let him manhandle you, settling you into his lap, "And I am sorry, I really wasn't thinking. I promise it won't happen again."
Astarion doubted that, not when he was well-versed of your weak spot for children. No matter where you went you couldn't help but fawn over them, not to mention the insane lengths you would go to keep any child safe. It was a complete and utter blind spot, your kindness extending to them all, even the little scam artists and hellions.
It was sweet, if not extremely worrying at first. Astarion had been terrified of you finding out his past. The things that he had been forced to do, the innocents whose lives he had destroyed. But not only did you find out, you were forced to see it. Both of you were, and it had been worse than anything Astarion could have imagined. He had always found a slight comfort knowing that those he captured would at least die quickly, that at the very least they wouldn't suffer the same agonizing fate as he, just an agonizing death. But no, even that small comfort had been a lie. The horror of finding them all down there has yet to be matched. He had never felt more self-loathing, more pure disgust than the moment he had found those children, tortured and pale, all because of him.
How you didn't see him for the wretched thing he was after all that, Astarion wasn't sure. But he was grateful. You were too good for him. A fact that he was devastatingly aware of, but that wasn't going to stop him from keeping you.
He still thinks about it on occasion, despite the fact that he had done all he could to right his wrongs. They all at least had a chance now to have a life worth living, Astarion could only hope that it would be used. Their future was out of his hands now, a small comfort.
But despite his complicated feelings towards children, he was more than capable of handling them for one evening. And in all honesty, he truly didn't have to do much. He was on self-mandated baby duty, because of course you had to help out the infant that would scream bloody murder unless it was being held. Keeping her tucked against him was a move of self-preservation, if he ever wanted to retain his hearing.
Most of the night was spent amused as he watched you entertain a gaggle of toddlers. You were so... creative with the ways you could defuse their antics. It came to you so naturally, nearly like you were a born mother yourself. It wasn't exactly surprising that you were fantastic with children, he had seen it time and time again. Arabella, Mol, Yenna, all of which still wrote you letters, visited occasionally. Staying forever attached, even from a distance.
Now that Astarion thought about it, it was odd that you weren't a mother. Odder still that you hadn't never even brought up the possibility of having children together. You were usually so open with your wants and always encouraging the same from him. Just one more thing he loved about you. But... why hadn't it been mentioned? Astarion had always assumed it was because you didn't truly want any of your own, that you enjoyed their fun innocence while avoiding the more laborious responsibility of raising them.
Though watching you take care of them all, changing diapers and negotiating silly arguments with a soft smile of your face had him rethinking his assumption.
"You're good with them," Astarion said eventually after you had successfully set the older three down for the night, the baby still stubbornly clinging to him, "I don't think there's a child we've met that doesn't adore you."
You laughed quietly, walking over to kiss him softly on the cheek. Your eyes wandered to the sleeping infant in his arms, still holding a piece of his shirt in it's little fist, "You don't seem to be too bad with them either."
"Newborns don't know any better," Astarion dismissed as he tried to put her down in their borrowed crib. Tried and failed, considering how the thing immediately started to whine the second he attempted to pry it's little hand away.
Oh for fuck's sake. Astarion wasn't even going to try and argue. Instead he unbuttoned his shirt and let it fall into the crib with her, seemingly doing the trick of stopping her from waking completely.
When he turned back you were staring at him with soft eyes, looking lovestruck at the simple act of him laying a child down, "Looks like she has pretty good taste to me."
"I don't think your judgment should be trusted," Astarion huffed as he walked over to you, grabbing your hand to drag you to the bedroom. He glanced back at you, his heart nearly skipping a beat from the sweet way you kept looking at him. It had his mind wandering again, those questions still nagging him.
Questions that he didn't have the courage to ask until dead of night, when he had you half asleep against his bare chest, "Have you ever thought of having children?"
He hadn't meant to blurt that out in the middle of the night, but Astarion apparently had a knack for starting important conversations at inconvenient times. Not that you minded.
You just cuddled into him closer, nodding against him with a sigh, "I've always wanted my own children. My own mother, Gods bless her soul, made it all sound so magical. Pregnancy, the early years, puberty, all of it. She loved it all. And I guess it rubbed off on me. It used to be all I could think about, before real life got in the way."
Astarion listened, a little annoyed at himself for not putting the pieces together sooner. You had talked so lovingly about your late parents, how you always wanted to be like your mother. Of course you would want children. How had he not connected the dots?
"But then I went off to the temple," You continued, "I completed my training, went off into the world to do good, blah, blah, blah. You know the story."
"So you grew out of the idea?" Astarion asked.
"Not exactly," You admitted, sounding a little guilty, "But I would never ask that of you love, it's not something you have to worry about."
That-what?
Astarion stared down at you, brow furrowed, "What do you mean?"
"I mean I know that the topic of children is... difficult for you. Considering everything you've been through-"
"I think you mean to say everything I've inflicted on others," Astarion interrupted, unwilling to allow himself grace. Especially when it came to the children of the Gur, "It was much worse for them than me."
You nodded, knowing better than to try and fight him on that particular topic, "I understand, but my point is that I can live without them. You're all I need."
It was comforting to hear, an immediate balm to a brand new set of insecurities that Astarion hadn't been prepared for. But even so... he hated the idea of you sacrificing even more for him. It felt wrong, "But-"
"But nothing," You interrupted softly, setting a quick kiss to his mouth, I'm serious Astarion, you don't need to worry. I'm happy, I love you, and everything is fine."
"I love you too," Astarion murmured, at a loss to say anything else. But the conversation didn't end there.
Astarion couldn't stop thinking about it, even long after the temporary children were sent back home. ou seemed so... sure that he didn't want children, and a week ago he probably would have agreed. But that was back before he knew that he was actively keeping you away from something you wanted. Something you had dreamed about since you were a child. And it felt wrong to be the reason for that, so, so wrong.
He didn't even know if his true feelings on the matter were real. He didn't want children for many of the same reasons he never wanted a partner. The attachment to another was dangerous, he was beyond unequipped to deal with others, let alone care for them, and the entire ideology behind love was ripe for manipulation and heart break. But then he met you and everything changed. Suddenly, caring for another didn't feel like a weakness, it felt like the strongest aspect of his entire self. Taking care of you wasn't an unwanted duty, it was intimacy. Something that he now craved. If all of those steadfast ideals could fall apart simply through meeting you, whose to say he could even trust himself when it came the thoughts around having a child?
Would having one truly be so bad? A little piece of the two of you, alive in the world? And perhaps children were annoying but... Astarion would be lying if he said he didn't have a soft spot for them. He had kept his distance before, but now he was fully confident that he wasn't a danger, no with Cazador burned to nothing bus ash and his own bloodlust well controlled. And it's not as if he was incapable of being a father, worse men than him did it everyday.
It was a confusing place to be, this tightwire of indecisiveness. Confusing enough for him to start a bit of research. He was vaguely aware that it was possible for his kind to breed, but finding out the details was disheartening, to say the least. First he had to parse out the different horror stories of babes eating their way out of their mother's wombs with actual facts, which wasn't exactly pleasant. But the truth was that it was more than possible for the two of you to have child together. It had the potential to either be as noneventful as any pregnancy, with the cavate that the babe coming out looking slightly... dead wouldn't be a permanent state of being. Or it could be as risky as carrying a child could be, with pains and complications galore, even legitimate worries of internal bleeding from the wretched thing prematurely growing claws. Not to mention the occasional, intense blood lust that could occur, an experience that Astarion would prefer you didn't have to go to.
Looking into the reality of the choice didn't help as much as he had assumed it would. If anything it just made the whole situation more real. Even if he wasn't a vampiric spawn, childbirth was risky. Maybe not as risky for you considering how Astarion would move the heavens and hells to get you the best care possible, but still. The thought of you passing, leaving him alone with the child you wanted and would never see, would destroy him. Completely and utterly.
But then again... there was the magical alternative of everything working out just fine. The two of you were both beyond lucky in that regard, considering how you'd overcome mind flayer parasites and fought and won against a near god. It was more than possible that everything would be fine, that you would have a beautiful pregnancy that would end in an even more amazing child. Then two would become three, a family of his very own.
That... didn't sound too bad. Astarion was torn. On one hand, he was almost certain that he was willing to go through with it. Not just because he loved you and wanted you to be happy, though it was the main reason. But also because... he could be a part in making something good. A child that would never suffer the way he did, the way countless others had. One who would be loved, who would have the help they needed for their inevitable unholy hungers. Someone precious for the two of you to fret over, to adore and care for. He... wanted that. Or at least he would if you still did. Now if he could just figure out how to bring it up, maybe something could actually happen.
But luckily enough for him, you did the job for him. He had been pouring over another book dedicated to recording the births of Dhampirs in the area, only to be distracted by you loudly sighing behind him.
"What's wrong love?" Astarion asked, his eyes still scanning the page in front of him.
"Oh I don't know," You sighed, rounding the corner to sit on the edge of his desk, "I just can't help but wonder when you're going to explain why you've suddenly become obsessed with parenting books. And..."
You trailed off, ignoring his surprised expression to read the cover of what was in front of him, "'Vampiric and Mortal Love & The Spawn They Create'. It's not exactly your usual reading material."
Part of Astarion wanted to be surprised that you had already figured him out. He had at least been trying to hide things from you slightly, not that it mattered when you could read him like a book. And he supposed that blatantly reading things like this in front of you would eventually have an effect, even if he tried to obscure the titles.
But that didn't stop him from stuttering through a response, "Well-I, okay. I've just been thinking about options lately. Which you can't really do if you don't understand what they are. Hence the books."
You frowned at him, one leg crossed over the other, "Star, I already told you that you don't need to worry-"
"But I want to worry," Astarion interrupted, deciding that ripping the band-aid off would be the best course of action, "And if there is something I can be doing to make you happier than I should at least consider it."
"I'm not going to force you into this for that," You said softly, reaching out to twine his fingers against yours, "This isn't the kind of thing you do just for someone else."
Astarion was aware of that, there was an important truth to your words. But... "What if it wasn't just for you?"
You paused, your brow furrowed as you stared at him, "What do you mean?"
"I mean what if, and consider this purely hypothetical, what if I wanted one as well. What then?" It was as far from hypothetical as Astarion could get, but by the look on your face it didn't seemed like that needed to be clarified.
You swallowed, looking just shy of hopeful as you played with his hand, "I... well. I guess in that case we would have a lot to talk about."
That wasn't quite the answer he was looking for. He pressed on, "So if in theory, I did want one. Would... you still be interested in having one?"
With me?
He left that part unsaid as he waited for an answer, uncharacteristically nervous as you mulled it over. But you were smiling, bright and wide, giving his hand a little squeeze as you spoke, "I think that would be the only scenario where I would want it. If that's something you wanted."
"I think it is," Astarion answered honestly, done with being coy, "I don't know how, I... I'm not quite sure how I feel about you carrying something that could be dangerous. But... in general yes. I think I want this. I do want this. With you and only you. Whenever your ready."
The next part Astarion did see coming, his arms already open by the time you launched yourself at him. You straddled his lap, kissing every part of his face as you babbled, "We can wait! It doesn't need to be now but-I just-yes! Adoption, childbirth, I don't care. All I need is to have them with you. That's all I want."
"And that I can give," Astarion laughed, delighted at your reaction. He still had concerns, plenty of them in fact, but they were hard to consider when the woman he adored was so ecstatic.
He gripped your chin, chuckling at the whine you let out for him interrupting your onslaught of affection. You didn't have to wait long, not when he directed your mouth against his, kissing you deeply as a new wave of exciting, and slightly nauseating feelings worked through him.
He didn't know exactly what was going to happen in the future. He had no idea if he would be a good father, but he knew that he would try his damndest. He didn't know how the two of you would even procure a child, but he did no one thing.
With you by his side, it would work out. All of it, no matter how hard the road turned out to be. And that was all that mattered.
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ashwhowrites · 8 days
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AHHHH IVE BEEN WAITING FOR YOUR REQUESTS TO OPEN UP!!!!! I’m obsessed with your writing 😩 (I apologize in advanced for my gibberish below for I am VERY high 😂)
Anywho (and you can totally ignore this if it’s not your cup of tea):
Would you possibly do an angst to fluff Eddie x reader fic where maybe instead of reader being the popular one, it was Eddie instead? Like instead of everyone hating on hellfire, they think it’s super cool and so Eddie is super popular and reader is like a quiet nerd. And like reader has a big crush on Eddie and Eddie knows but always makes fun of her for it because of his reputation but he secretly likes her too and then the events of the upside down happen? Like maybe it’s reader who lures the bats away instead of Eddie but Eddie saves the reader before she dies from the bats and he admits that he likes her back and they start dating?
Again, if it’s not your cup of tea you can totally ignore it but you’re the only person I feel like would do something magical with this.
I'm honored you believe I can do something magical with this. I hope I won you over.
I think this might be my favorite Eddie fic to date. I hope everyone enjoys this as much as I do! Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻
⚠️it ends happy and I like the ending. So don't complain in the comments about "she shouldn't have taken him back" it's fiction and sometimes we just want things to work out so for this fic, leave that opinion to yourself. Saying that in the kindest way I can❤️
To die for
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Y/N wasn't the type to hang out with the popular crowd. She kept her distance and didn't interact with anyone. She focused on her studies and getting into the best school offered. No one wanted to stay in Hawkins, and she worked to get her ticket out.
Then she got a little distracted, and she hated to admit it.
Eddie Munson, the leader of hellfire. He was a punk, loved music, and caught the eyes of every girl. Y/N didn't see the attraction until they got paired to do an assignment in music class.
She twiddled her thumbs nervously when he walked over. She inhaled his cologne as he pulled out the chair next to her, his bright smile flashed her way as his cheeks scrunched. He was the only popular kid in music, and she was terrified to be paired with him.
But as they worked together, they talked about themselves. It turned out they had a lot in common. While the assignment was boring research, she couldn't help but be excited to go to music every day. The assignment was a huge part of their grade so the teacher gave them a month's worth of class to work on it. It didn't take more than one class for Y/N to be just as smitten with Eddie.
~~~
"I hate that we couldn't pick which musician to research. Like why can't we do Dio?" Y/N mumbled as she began to write down notes.
Eddie never lifted his head so fast, he looked away from the computer towards Y/N. Her eyes were on her paper.
"You listen to Dio?" Eddie let out a breathy laugh. He was shocked, to say the least. He never thought the cute nerd would listen to a band like that.
"Who doesn't," Y/N laughed, she finished writing the sentence and looked up. She gulped when she noticed Eddie's warm eyes staring at her. A smile of adoration on his face, it made her stomach flip.
"Damn, there's more than just brains and beauty to you, huh?" Eddie joked as he went back to the computer. His words repeated in Y/N's head as she sat stunned. Did he just admit she was pretty?
~~~
Y/N cleaned her room at a rapid pace. Eddie was going to be over any minute and she was terrified. She was positive Eddie had seen the inside of many girl's bedrooms and she did not want to leave a bad impression compared to the rest.
~
"Can we take a break? My eyes hurt." Eddie groaned as he fell back against her soft bed.
"Sure, I'll grab us some water." Y/N offered, as she went out of the room. Eddie stood up, and his socks landed on the soft carpet. He walked around her room. He took in her huge collection of books, many he never heard of before. He looked at her wall of music. Band posters were on the walls and cassettes were neatly placed on a shelf. He had to admit, she had great music taste.
Her closet was cracked open, and Eddie couldn't fight the urge. He cringed as the door creaked as he opened it.
"Pretty girl," Eddie smiled as he grabbed the acoustic guitar that leaned against the wall.
"What are you doing?"
Eddie jumped but kept a tight grip on the neck of the guitar.
"Uh, sorry. I was snooping." Eddie confessed, "You play?"
Y/N blushed at the thought of him snooping, embarrassed of what he found and thought.
"I've always wanted to, but I'm not very good. One of the things I couldn't teach myself." Y/N laughed sadly.
"Sit, I'll teach you," Eddie said, he sat on her bed
"Um, are you sure?"
"Pretty girl in my lap as I teach her the thing I love? Yeah, I'm sure." He smirked as she slowly walked over. She sat the water down on her side table.
She coughed as she sat on the bed, next to him.
"Can't teach you all the way over there," he teased, she swallowed her nerves when he moved behind her. He placed the guitar in her lap and wrapped his arms around her.
"You smell nice," Eddie said against her ear. Y/N felt her tongue go numb, too nervous to respond.
She placed her fingers on the guitar and Eddie's ghosted over hers. She tried to focus on his directions and movements, but his breath hitting her neck sent her somewhere down south.
After an hour, she successfully could play a few chords.
"That a girl," Eddie praised as he placed the guitar to the side. "Unfortunately, I have to go home."
"Oh um yeah, thanks for teaching me," Y/N said shyly as Eddie put on his jacket.
"Pleasure is all mine," Eddie winked.
Y/N stared at the spot where he once stood for what felt like hours.
~~~
After spending a full month together, Y/N didn't want it to end. Their assignment was turned in, and now they didn't have a reason to see each other.
Y/N found a way. She sat on the phone all night trying to win tickets to the Dio concert, on Friday night. She scored the tickets and couldn't wait to tell Eddie the exciting news. She raced through the halls spotted his curly hair and headed his way.
"Eddie!" She said excitedly as she bounced on her feet. She ignored all the friends surrounding him. Her eyes were on his. She felt her excitement dissolve when Eddie's eyes looked panicked. He looked at her and his friends, she swore he looked like he was going to throw up.
"Yo dude, who's this?" one of his friends said as the group laughed and nudged Eddie's arm.
"Some type of little girlfriend?" Another one was added on
Y/N blushed at the thought of being Eddie's girlfriend. It wasn't like she didn't think about it with all the flirting and soft touches.
But Y/N ignored in and continued.
"I scored tickets to Dio! This Friday night, you and me?" She was proud of herself for making it through the sentence without shaking.
Eddie's friends laughed....loud
Their screeches could be heard blocks down from the school. But she kept her focus on Eddie. He stood frozen. He didn't say a word as he stared back at her.
"Oh, how cute. Little nerd has a crush on ya, Munson!"
"Looks like someone has a date on Friday."
"Atta boy, another one on the list."
"I uh..uh" Eddie stuttered
"Do you think he's actually going to say yes?"
The crowd around them got bigger as the school watched.
Y/N felt his friend's words stab her in the chest. Now she felt like she wanted to throw up. Her eyes watered as she looked around, everyone was staring and waiting for Eddie's reaction.
"Are you going to say something?" She meant it as a question, but it sounded like a plea. Like she was pleading him to tell them they were wrong and that they had something. That their moments meant something to him.
Y/N saw the Eddie she knew disappear in his eyes, and she knew he was going to land the final blow. She stepped back as she tried to brace herself.
"Do I know you?" Eddie asked, he pretended to look confused as his friends laughed.
"Eddie, don't," she whimpered, but it didn't matter. It was popularity or her, and she knew it wasn't a fighting chance.
"Look, sweetheart. I am flattered, but there is no way in hell I'd ever go out with you." Eddie smirked as his friends nudged him and they all fist-bumped behind his back.
Y/N didn't say a word, she nodded sadly and turned around. She pushed through the crowd as the tears slipped down.
"Oh, poor baby is even crying!" A girl's voice announced, then laughs followed.
Y/N shoved the tickets in the trash before she ran out.
Eddie was dead to her.
~
Eddie gulped as she raced off. His friends still hyped him up as he felt the hallways closing in on him. He stepped forward as she threw the tickets in the trash, but he stopped.
He felt guilty, he felt so fucking guilty. He wanted more than anything to spend his Friday night singing along to his favorite band with the cutest girl he'd ever met. To hold her hand as they walked in, to dance like idiots during their favorite song, and to talk about it for days after.
But he panicked. He wasn't supposed to like someone like her.
~~~
After Y/N embarrassed herself in front of the whole school, her life went to hell.
She couldn't walk in the halls without people laughing and pointing.
She dreaded music class. She kept her head down whenever she walked in, she felt his eyes burn into her. But she refused to look in his direction. She should have known Eddie would only like her behind her bedroom door. She should have known he was incapable of liking her shamelessly.
The cafeteria was loud as Y/N walked to her table, Robin was already sitting and picking at her lunch.
"Hey Y/N!"
Y/N looked over her shoulder, she groaned when she realized it was coming from Eddie's table.
"Turns out Eddie does wanna see Dio!"
Y/N looked to Eddie who kept his head down. She looked back at his friend confused.
"Just with a hot cheerleader, not you!"
The table erupted in laughter as she bit her lip. She knew Eddie wouldn't speak up so she turned around and walked to her table.
"I'm sorry they are dicks," Robin said as Y/N sat down.
"It's whatever." Y/N shrugged
"Um Y/N?"
Y/N looked up and was shocked to see Eddie standing there. She looked behind him and noticed his table was watching.
"Yeah?" She asked quietly, it hurt to even look at him.
"I'm so sorry for everything," he whispered.
"Is it like a trap?" she asked confused, as she suspiciously looked back at his table.
"No, I just re-"
"Whatcha doing here, lover boy?" Eddie's friend appeared next to him.
"I was...umm" Eddie nervously stuttered, the panic in his body again. He looked at Y/N's sad face and back to his friend's accusing one.
"Not trying to talk her up, are you?" His friend asked with a chuckle.
"No, of course not! I was just telling her to stop calling me. Chick won't leave me alone." Eddie faked laughed. His friend seemed to believe him, laughing with him, as they walked back to their table.
Eddie looked over his shoulder and mouthed "Sorry" but Y/N rolled her eyes.
~~~
Even if Eddie agreed to go to the concert, he wouldn't have been able to go.
Instead of sulking in his room about his poor decisions, he was stuck in the upside down.
"Dustin and Eddie you go to the trailer and lure them to you. Then the second the bats come, get back inside the trailer. Do not come out!" Steve said, his finger pointed at Dustin.
The group went to their positions and prayed their plan would work.
~
"QUICK WE NEED TO CREATE MORE NOISE TO LURE THE BATS AWAY FROM EDDIE AND DUSTIN!" Steve screamed.
"I KNOW WHAT TO DO!" Robin yelled as she grabbed the radio.
~
A panicked Dustin screamed over the radio as the bats began to chip parts of the trailer away. Eddie tried to swallow his fear but he knew this was it. He lived his life, did he have any regrets? So damn many.
He hated that he couldn't fix things with Y/N. He hated that she wouldn't get the closure she deserved, she wouldn't get the apology Eddie had been practicing for weeks.
If he knew his life was going to end so short, he wouldn't have wasted it on popularity. He would have picked her.
Eddie closed his eyes as he felt the cold air rush in, the bats were loud as they began to swarm into the trailer. He cried out as the bats clawed and nipped at his skin. He yelled for Dustin to run and not stop.
Eddie wasn't sure who to pray to but he did. He prayed as his clothes were torn and he felt blood rushing down his chest.
Then suddenly, the bats stopped.
A loud ring of music began to blast, Eddie knew he left his guitar on the top, and the sound wasn't coming from it.
The bats raced out and chased the sound.
"Who's doing that?" Dustin asked
"I have no idea. You okay?" Eddie asked, checking on him before he grabbed his weapons.
"Yes. Let's go!" Dustin said as he climbed out of the trailer.
Along with the bats, Eddie and Dustin raced. Eddie ran as fast as he could and Dustin jumped on his bike.
Eddie ignored all the pain he felt as he kept running. As he got closer, he realized it wasn't a song. It was the same few chords over and over.
And Eddie knew those chords.
Eddie felt even more panic in his chest as he guessed who was playing it. In a selfish way, he hoped it was someone else. It was wrong but he prayed it was someone in the group, and not her.
"WHO IS THAT?" Dustin screamed as he threw down his bike and prepared his weapons.
"It's Y/N," Eddie gulped as his eyes took in the sight of Y/N playing the guitar. She didn't have any protection, simply standing in her normal clothes as she risked herself for everyone stuck in the upside down.
For a second, everything was silent. The guitar stopped. Eddie's eyes caught hers. Both stared at each other as time slowed.
"I FORGIVE YOU!" Y/N screamed, the tears flowed down her cheeks as she threw the guitar to the ground.
"NO!" Eddie screamed, but it was too late. The bats already found her. Her body was taken to the ground as she screamed in horror.
"GET HELP!" Eddie screamed at Dustin, he didn't look back at him. He just ran to her.
He started swinging everywhere, he heard thuds and screeches. Eddie used every ounce of anger and hurt that his body held as motivation to swing the shit out of these blood suckers. The agony screams coming from Y/N's lips made him move faster.
Dustin called for help on the radio, he wasn't going to leave them alone. He quickly joined Eddie and began to swing.
Eddie didn't have time to yell at him, in the moment he was grateful the kid didn't listen to him. Together they cleared the path towards her. Eddie thought he felt the greatest amount of fear, but when her screams stopped he knew he was wrong.
~
Y/N felt like she finally caught her breath. She gasped as her eyes opened. Bright white lights shined above her that caused her to shut them again.
"Y/N?" She heard a relieved voice say then a warm hand intertwined with hers.
She slowly opened her eyes, a familiar brown eyes looked back at her. He was covered in dirt, blood stained clothes but he still was the prettiest man she'd ever seen.
"Hm, even in heaven you look the same." She said, her voice cracking with every word.
Eddie laughed and grabbed some water. He softly put it against her lips and helped her lift her head to drink.
"Well you haven't made it there yet." Eddie joked. "You had all of us scared."
Y/N looked around the room, but no one else was there. "You are the only one here."
Eddie scratched his head, "they were, but the nurse said only one person at a time, and well I called dibs for six hours." He said as he looked at his watch.
"Why?" She asked, from what she's learned he wanted nothing to do with her.
"I know it's incredibly hard to believe, but I have feelings for you. I know I've been a dick to you and I'm sorry for all the pain I caused. It's pathetic that it took you nearly dying to grow balls and be honest. But before you showed up, I was positive I was going to die. And all I thought about in that moment was how you deserved an apology and that I regretted not taking my chance with you." Eddie confessed. His hands were still in hers as he sat on the chair next to her bed. His eyes were red, and his cheeks were wet.
"It is pathetic, Munson." Y/N snapped, but she kept her hands in his. His touch was warm and soft, a feeling that reminded her she was still alive.
Her heart wanted to hug him and cry. But her head wanted her to keep her pride and tell him to fuck off.
"Did you mean it? When you said you forgave me?" Eddie choked out, sniffling back his tears.
"I prepared to die and I didn't want to ruin your life even more." Y/N confessed, sadness flood through her body as she remembered how worthless she felt because of him. He was the only person in her life that made her feel loved, but hated at the same time. In the end, that was the only experience she had with love and she was okay to die with that in mind because at least it was someone she'd die for.
"You never ruined my life!" Eddie promised, his wet lips kissed her hand as he sobbed. "You are a gift in my life, okay? I've never felt so happy around someone and so alive. I'm an idiot and I made all the wrong decisions. But I swear on my life, I'll make this up to you if you give me a chance. I love you."
Y/N snapped her head as she felt her heart race. The machine gave it away as it beeped.
"You love me?" She whispered, tears flowing down her face as she looked into his eyes.
The Eddie she knew was behind them.
"So damn much. I know I don't deserve anything and I definitely don't deserve you. But I'll do it all right this time. It'll be us and that's all I want."
"Is that why you saved me?" She choked out, she remembered his arms carrying her as he screamed for help. The fear in his eyes and the panic in his voice. He didn't have to come save her, but he did.
"The second I heard those chords, my heart fell out of my chest and my only goal was to get to you before the bats did. I'm very angry with Robin for putting you in that position, but she knew you'd do it to save me. And you deserve someone who'd save you back."
Y/N didn't say anything, she unlaced her hand from Eddie's. He tried to ignore the disappointment he felt.
She sat up slowly then placed her hands on Eddie's cheeks, before he knew it, she leaned in and smashed her lips on his. He felt his stomach flip a thousand times as he reached forward to hold her waist. He kissed her back with everything he had left in him. The kiss tasted of blood and dirt, but it was the best kiss he's ever had.
After a few moments, she pulled away and gasped for air. Eddie leaned his forehead against hers, his eyes still closed as he tried to memorize the feeling of her lips on his.
"I love you too." She whispered, before her lips attached to his again.
Eddie meant everything he said. He was going to prove he was worthy of her and her love.
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Tags!
@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlxt
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iamasaddie · 11 months
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some rotten man
paring: dark!Joel x f!Reader rating: explicit (18+ minors DNI) word count: 1,2k~ summary: you really never thought you'd need this type of training. a/n: I'm all flavors of fucked up and so is Joel, make sure you check out the warnings before you proceed with reading! Special thanks to the literal love of my life, my emotional support human and beta @bearsbeetsbeskar <;3 warnings: dead dove do not eat; PWP (for real, no plot at all); implied non-con; explicit sexual content; rough oral sex (m receiving); degradation; spitting; face slapping (barely); no use of y/n ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴀ ᴡᴏʀᴋ ᴏꜰ ꜰɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴ. ɪ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴄᴏɴᴅᴏɴᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱɪᴛᴜᴀᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ᴅᴇꜱᴄʀɪʙᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴡᴏʀᴋ ɪʀʟ. ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ, ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ꜰᴏʀɢᴇᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴡʀɪᴛɪɴɢ ᴀɴᴅ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ꜰɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ɪꜱ ᴀ ᴡᴀʏ ᴏꜰ ʜᴇᴀʟɪɴɢ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘʀᴏᴄᴇꜱꜱɪɴɢ ᴛʀᴀᴜᴍᴀ ꜰᴏʀ ꜱᴏᴍᴇ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ, ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴɴᴏᴛ ᴅɪᴄᴛᴀᴛᴇ ᴏʀ ᴘᴏʟɪᴄᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴅᴏ ɪᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴛʏᴘᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴡᴏʀᴋꜱ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴄʜᴏᴏꜱᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴛᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴏɴꜱᴜᴍᴇ. ꜱᴛᴀʏ ꜱᴀꜰᴇ, ᴘʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴄᴇ ᴄᴏɴꜱᴇɴꜱᴜᴀʟ ꜱᴇx ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴘʀᴇᴀᴅ ʟᴏᴠᴇ.
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"Now, my little slut, you're going to open that fucking mouth of yours and I'm going to fuck it until you're so full that my cum gushes out of it. Do you understand me?"
You trembled under the man's towering figure, his bloodied hand gripping your hair so tight that tears started welling up in your red eyes.
"I can't fuckin' hear you, baby girl."
"Ye- yes." You stuttered out and nodded, but didn't do anything else to show your consent.
“Well then what are you waiting for, darlin'? Stick that bratty tongue of yours out."
You opened your mouth, following his command. A deep inhale made your throat dry, but when you saw him pulling his cock out your throat became sandpaper. Joel’s cock was massive even with his height and broad frame. It was big to the point that even under different circumstances you'd find it terrifying. The head was deep dusty pink, slit glistening with beads of precum. He was thick, veins covering the shaft made it look even bigger and more intimidating. You tried to swallow with your tongue still licking air, but your throat just contracted, walls sticking to each other unpleasantly.
"You look hungry, little one,” Joel barked a laugh, “let me help you with that.”
He slapped his dick on your tongue, letting you feel the weight of it, before leaning back and furrowing his brows. Joel looked at you, your pathetic position sent shivers down his spine. There was just this one little thing… Before you could even brace yourself, you felt before seeing him spitting directly onto your tongue, and then putting his cock back where he thought it belonged. “Oh, yeah,” he almost sang with pleasure, “that’s better, isn't it?”
You just stayed still, getting used to the foreign weight in your mouth, the meat of his cock filling you completely even though you saw he wasn't halfway in. His hips rocked violently, the tip hitting the back of your throat and he threw his head back. His moan would be deafening if it didn't drown in the sound of you gagging and coughing. You knew that if you'd had anything to eat in the last few days it'd be already all over him. Reflexively, you pushed back as far as you could with your hands tied behind your back. One second his cock fell out of your mouth, and the next a loud slap and a burning sensation on your left cheek made tears spring out of your eyes.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing, hm?” Joel grabbed your cheeks painfully squeezing them between his fingers and yanked you back so hard that your face met his crotch. “Stupid fucking slut," his hand twisted in your hair, roping it around his fist. “We're just getting started.” 
You didn't know if he was offended or excited by your physical reaction, but the next time he snapped his cock into your mouth he went even rougher, keeping you tightly pressed even when you started coughing and suffocating on it.
"You either control your breath or you're gonna die on my fat cock, baby.”
His tone was playful, but by the way he gripped your head you knew he was dead serious. You tried to calculate his rhythm and the intensity of his thrusts to get a small window of opportunity to get some air into your lungs even if the air you breathed was filling you with the man just as much. The heavy odor of his musk and a salty hint of sweat.
With each movement of his hips he filled you a little bit more, you were almost grateful to him for not trying to squeeze his whole dick into your throat in one thrust. You didn't know if minutes passed, or hours, the only thing you felt was the overwhelming thickness of his cock in your throat and the pulsating sensation when he stayed inside it for a moment too long. He moaned, enjoying the feeling of your throat contracting around his aching shaft, trying to violently push it out when he forced it to stay in place. 
"Fuck, little one, I might just stay in your throat forever.” He whispered harshly, and it felt like his grip on your head became almost gentle as he let go of your hair and scratched the back of your skull with blunt fingernails.
By the time he pulled his cock out of your mouth you thought this was never going to end. You felt your throat burning, saliva dripping from the corners of your mouth as you tried to catch your breath, tears streamed down your cheeks in an uncontrollable stream. 
"Not bad for a first, hm, baby?" 
You couldn't answer, vocal chords betraying you, but Joel wasn't one to talk into the void. Once again he grabbed you by the hair, yanking it so hard you could swear he ripped a strand or two as he forced you to make eye-contact with him, his glistening cock a threat in front of your lips. "I asked you a fucking question."
"Yes." Your voice was hoarse and barely above whisper.
"Yes what, slut?"
"Yes, Sir."
Talking hurt even more than swallowing his massive shaft down your throat, it was like sandpaper scraping open wounds. Of course he couldn't pass up an opportunity to mention it.
"Got my little cockslut's throat fucked up, didn't I?" His smile was full of animalistic pride as he tutted and shook his head. Joel reached for your cheek with his hand and you braced yourself for another slap, but only a cruelly gentle caress followed. "It's okay, little one, I have the perfect medicine that's gonna cure all the soreness. Open up," he patted your chin, "come on, fucktoy, I'm not going to repeat myself."
As soon as you opened your trembling lips that were already torn on the edges from his abuse, he was quick to shove his cock inside your warmth. By the way you felt it throb on your tongue as it slid further down your throat, you knew that he was close. The man above you was groaning, with every violent thrust of his hips the rough material of his jeans met your burning skin, making you wince. You felt his hand slowly descend from the back of your head and curl around your throat. It was huge, big enough to easily grab half of your neck. You were barely able to inhale between his thrusts and you were terrified that if he squeezed you a bit harder he'd just end up shooting a load down a corpse's throat. But it wasn't his intention. Instead, he tightened his grip just right to feel his cock down your throat but at the same time not cutting off your air flow completely. 
“Ughh,” his groan was primal, reverberating from the depths of his chest and vibrating through all of his body. "Perfect. Fucking. Slut.” Each word was accentuated with a thrust, deeper and deeper, you wouldn’t be surprised if your chin was bruised from his efforts already. He squeezed your throat harder than before and moaned as he could almost feel his thick and salty load dripping down the inside of your throat. When you started thrashing, he finally noticed that your face got dangerously purple from the lack of breathing and pulled out, opting to squeeze your bruised cheeks instead. 
"That's it, baby, good job." He cooed with a sick sweetness. "You need some training, but it's okay. We've got all the time in the world, and I'm an excellent teacher."
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ghouljams · 1 month
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Has Love ever held Bug for Birdie for any reason and has Ghost seen her if she did? I just want to watch Professor Ghost have a moment when he sees how sweet Love is with a baby.
Love and Birdie don't have many opportunities to cross paths, HOWEVER, you're so so right about Ghost seeing Love with a baby bestie and I'm going to make it happen.
Ghost follows after Gaz, the two men discussing last night's footie match as they weave through the education department's halls.
"You coming for dinner?" Gaz asks, "Soap's already invited himself."
"Not doin' anything else," Ghost hums, eyes scanning the various posters pinned around the halls. Children's drawings and calls for volunteers, internship opportunities. The education building has always given him a sort of squirmy feeling in his stomach. He can't help but think about his nephew, what grade he'd be going into, whether he'd be doing well. Gaz smacks his chest to pull him from his thoughts.
"Giving you a ride, may as well stay." Gaz grins, and Ghost rolls his eyes.
"Just don't go handing me the baby again," Ghost tells him as they turn the corner to Birdie's office. Ghost stops short, gaze sticking to Love as soon as he sees her. Gaz grabs his shoulder to stop him from turning around.
Love smiles, grins really, lighting up the hallway as Birdie chatters away about something. She's bouncing Gaz's baby in her arms, the infant's head tucks against her shoulder as she rocks and bounces. Birdie spots them and waves, Ghost has to force his feet to carry him forward as Gaz drags him into the thick of it. There's not much that scares Ghost, but babies? Terrifying. His eyes stick to Bug, the tiny thing has their fingers wrapped around Love's necklace, the rest of them lax and sleeping against her shoulder.
Birdie says something and Ghost grunts, his eyes moving from the baby back to the woman holding them. Love glances at him, cooing softly at Bug when they start to fuss. When he'd thought about marriage he hadn't imagined kids. There were certain things, specific dreams, that always seemed off limits to him, parts of the Riley lineage that were cursed. It had felt like a noble sacrifice to have the name die with him.
But there was Love, there was a baby, a future, sleeping under her gentle hand, and there was a warmth in Ghost's chest that he hadn't felt before. "You like kids?" He asks. Gaz and Birdie discussing evening plans beside them hardly seem to hear the question.
"They're alright," Love hums, "I never think I want any until someone puts a baby in my arms, then it's like all bets are off." She laughs, the motion of it hardly jostling the infant. Ghost watches the way her hand smooths over Bug's back, gentling every soft breath the infant takes. "What about you?"
"What about me?" The question catches him off guard. Love raises her brows.
"Do you like kids?" She bites down her teasing smile, her teeth tugging at her lip. Charming, every inch of her seems tailor made to tug at his heart. Ghost reaches to uncurl Bug's tight fist, easing the chain of her necklace out of the baby's grip.
"This one's ok," Ghost supplies, settling the necklace back against Love's chest, "Liked my nephew."
"It's easier when they're your kids," She tilts her head for him, her skin prickling at the touch of his fingers. Ghost wonders if his hands are that cold. He hums.
"It is."
"Do you want kids?" Love asks. Ghost's eyes dart to her face, she isn't looking at him. Ghost looks at the baby, glances at the way Birdie smiles and leans in to kiss Gaz, a picture of familial bliss.
"I didn't used to," Ghost answers after a moment. That feels like the truth. He didn't used to, he didn't think about them, but now all he can think of is Love and babies: how pretty she'd be with one of his on her hip, what they'd look like, if they'd have his hair or if they'd have her eyes. If they were with her... maybe he does want kids.
He should start looking at houses again. They're going to need a yard, and more than just the main/guest bedrooms. He could do it. What's one kid?
Actually one kid might get lonely, things were always better when he had Tommy.
What's two kids?
Unless they're fighting.
Ok, three kids. Three kids, Ghost can handle three kids if they're hers too.
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You Can't Swim??
SUMMARY: The Octotrio don't know that you have never learned to swim. And you went to a beach. What could go wrong? WORD COUNT: 1.9k (I need to sleep)
WARNINGS: Floyd almost let you drown, reader kind of gets panic attacks? Idk (I'm the writer I should know, someone hit me), reader thinks about whacking Floyd, Azul is genuinely in love, Azul is also very traumatized I think, Azul overthinks A/N: Gotta love how I have no warnings about Jade I- Gotta love getting a fic idea about me being unable to swim- And I've had this thought swimming (lol) in my thoughts for a couple of days?? Idk if reader is the significant other of these guys or just besties. I think it leans toward s/o though This reads like a crack fic to me but honestly make sure you know how to swim so you don't die (i don't but that's not the point here) Maybe OOC Jade because he hides himself too well for me to get an accurate read on personality lmfao When Jade is genuinely sweet but the others are unhinged so naturally the unhinged ones are longer- I'm sorry I get no decent ideas for Jade </3 Another late late night post (it's 1:50 AM)
© kazumiwrites - All rights reserved; please do not steal, edit, copy, repost (etc) my work without my express permission.
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You had never learned to swim. It wasn't that you were afraid, really. It was just that you had passed the age where people normally learned, and now you were too lazy to and/or didn't have enough time. Whatever excuse to stop a nagging person.
Now, this wouldn't have been a problem if you never went anywhere near bodies of water. Which you mostly didn't. However, knowing merfolk was not the best idea if you didn't know how to swim.
Now you have gone to the beach with him, and that probably wasn't the best idea for either of you.
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Floyd Leech
You had been sitting on the beach near the water, absently looking over some shells as Floyd splashed around deeper in the ocean. The shells really were interesting - nothing like the ones where you had come from (although they had some similarities) and were colorful. So many shapes and varieties, although most were not intact.
You had been so engrossed in this, in fact, that you hadn't realized Floyd had been sneaking up on you. Before you could say another word, he playfully dragged you into the water. While you were fully clothed.
You weren't expecting to go into the water, but you should've known better with Floyd. He was playful and loved to do stuff like this. Usually if Azul was around, he'd have done something… But he wasn't here.
Before you knew it, you were deeper in the ocean than you ever had been before, courtesy to the teal-haired boy swimming and dragging you along. You flailed around a bit, eyes wide in panic. You were, quite honestly, terrified. And it obviously didn't help when Floyd just immediately let you go.
Was he an idiot or was he an idiot?
"Floyd-" You got out before coughing as water shot up your nose, still flailing miserably. It didn't work. You didn't know what to do. Surely, Floyd would help… If he realized what was going on. No matter what you thought, he was bright, wasn't he?
Not bright enough, it seemed, as he was still laughing and not realizing how actually panicked you were.
"Koebi-chan, you look so ridiculous like that," he laughed, almost in hysterics, and you would've smacked him if you weren't so close to actually dying.
And then you sunk.
Your desperate attempts to go to the surface were pointless as you didn't even know how to float or move around in the water.
After a few seconds, Floyd finally noticed you were gone and quickly dove under the surface. Maybe you were trying to get him back?
But his gaze immediately widened as he saw you literally sinking to the ocean floor. His eel tail moved quickly, almost without thinking as he shot to grab you and take you up, up, up so you could actually breathe.
When you came to, you were on the sandy beach again, Floyd leaning over you. His eyes, normally filled with a joking light, were unusually subdued.
"Koebi-chan, why didn't you tell me you couldn't swim?" A pout grew on Floyd's face. "If I knew, I wouldn't have-"
"Yes you would have. We would still be here, just having a different conversation."
"But-"
"No buts."
"I would've made it more fun-"
"Drowning in the ocean is the opposite of fun, Floyd-"
~Bonus because I don't know how to fit one into the story~ "I can teach you how to swim. You just go whoo and let your body move. Y'know. Like dancing." "No, I don't know, Floyd, and this is not going to help me with anything-"
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Jade Leech
Jade had been spending his time on the beach with you, but you were almost certain that he wanted to be swimming in the ocean. It was his natural element, after all.
"Jade, you sure you don't want to go in the water?"
"I'm fine staying here with you, [Y/N]." He gave you a soft smile.
You shook your head. "We've come all the way here, you might as well go swim." You gave him a gentle nudge.
"Well, I'd like you to come with me, if that is possible?" He watched you quietly. "You never go swimming with me."
You paused. Although it was sweet that he wanted you to go with him… "No, I don't think so…" You trailed off. You never liked telling people that you couldn't swim. At this point, it was embarrassing.
The pair of heterochromia eyes staring at you only left you feeling more jittery. "…I, er… I can't swim. So going into the ocean with you sounds kind of like… A bad idea." You froze. "Did you use your Signature Spell on me?"
"Of course not, [Y/N]." Jade stared at you with eyes of hurt, one that looked almost identical to that of his twin's. Only, it was almost obvious that Jade didn't mean the hurt in his eyes. "You just trust me enough to say things to me."
You couldn't deny the truth there. You trusted Jade. "And you wouldn't use your Signature Spell on something so trivial, would you?"
"No, I would not." He shrugged. "On a different note, I can help you learn how to swim."
"I really don't need it-"
"What if someone tries to hurt you one day and they know your weakness?"
"Why would-"
"It's an example, [Y/N]. But if that person decides to do that, you wouldn't be able to do anything. So I should help you in case that scenario occurs."
You sighed softly. "Fine, I guess I can take lessons from you… If it's not too much of a hassle."
"Of course it would not be a hassle or anything of the sort." Jade inclined his head. "All to help you stay safe."
The day went on with Jade helping you learn the basics of swimming - he was a good teacher, which you were happy about. He was patient, and always was there if you ever started to panic.
"We wouldn't want you getting scared of the ocean now, would we?"
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Azul Ashengrotto
Azul had gotten used to you after a couple months. Sure, he hadn't opened up to many people in a while (only Floyd and Jade, but they also teased him constantly about everything, so), but you were soothing and nice. Sure, you teased him sometimes, but it was different. It didn't feel mean, you stopped as soon as you noticed him looking a little uncomfortable, and… He honestly felt like he could open up about anything.
So when it was decided that you two were going to the beach - together - alone? It kind of made him very messed up.
Would you like being at the beach with him? He wasn't completely against showing his octopus form… Would you want him to swim with you? Was he even ready for that?
Those thoughts led him down a spiral, and the day you two were to go, he had bags under his eyes and looked like he was half-dead.
You gently nudged him, murmuring how he should've tried to get more sleep for this day supposedly filled with fun, but he just shrugged.
Soon, you were at the beach, and as Azul saw your smiling face, his gaze softened a little. He loved seeing your happy face.
"C'mon!" You grabbed Azul's hand as you started to run to the water, ignoring his surprised stumbling as he was dragged along. He had a light flush on his cheeks that he was glad you couldn't see.
Soon, you had reached the edge of the water, splashing around in your sandals. It was really fun, even though you knew that you were going to be getting sand in your toes later on.
Azul just kind of watched on, a relaxed expression on his face. This really was soothing… Although he was still thinking about if the Mostro Lounge would be okay with him gone. Surely Jade would do something if Floyd got into trouble… Hopefully. And hopefully, no more dishes would break.
"What are you looking so glum for?" Your voice brought him back to his senses.
"Nothing, just hoping that Jade and Floyd can take care of things at the Mostro Lounge." He sighed softly.
"Oh, I'm sure they'll be fine. Jade's there, right?"
"He can cause as much trouble as Floyd, you know. Although he won't be outright about it." Azul shook his head, a small frown on his face.
"C'mon, turn that frown upside down." You moved closer to him, gently squishing his cheeks. "Today is for having fun, Azul."
"Yes, yes, I know." Azul couldn't help himself; he let out a soft laugh. A genuine one.
You smiled brightly. "You aren't charging me for hearing your little cute laugh?"
"I will charge you if you call it cute."
"Of course you will." You rolled your eyes before abruptly changing the subject. "So are you not going to swim?"
Azul paused. Did you want him to swim? To see his true form? There was an even chance. What should his answer be? "Er… I don't know?"
"Of course you don't have to, Azul, I just thought… I mean, there's no one around." You shrugged a little.
And now more pressure on Azul. Great. He was used to dealing with pressure, yes. Just not this kind from you. "Er… Would you come swim with me?" If you were with him, then maybe…
"No." Your lips parted, maybe to offer an explanation, but it was too late.
Azul was in a downward spiral. Why had you said no? Perhaps octopi merfolk were really too much. Perhaps you would rather be with someone with a pretty tailfin than tentacles. Or maybe a human, one of your own kind. Who said that you even liked him at all? Perhaps you were only with him out of pity, because he was that useless, chubby, good-for-nothing-
"Azul? Azul, are you listening to me?"
He snapped back to attention.
"Seriously, are you okay? Did you seriously get enough sleep last night?" You sighed.
"That's none of your-"
"It is if you're literally zoning out every five seconds." You rolled your eyes. "And anyway, I was just saying that I kind of can't go deeper into the ocean where you probably feel comfortable swimming. Because I can't swim." You shrugged nonchalantly.
But for Azul, it felt like a figurative bomb had been dropped.
You? Couldn't swim? Now that he thought about it, it did make sense… How you always looked so awkward and uncomfortable with water, especially when you came to the Octavinelle dorm. But seriously? How could you not know how to swim?
"Is not knowing how to swim… Normal?"
"Definitely not." You rolled your eyes. "But I'm just too lazy to learn now. And I have no time."
"You do if you have time to scroll on Magicam." Finally, Azul felt a bit better. At least you didn't hate him.
"And this time, I'll teach you how to swim. I'll even do it free of charge." Azul shook his head. "Seeing as I'm so generous."
"You sound like headmage Crowley."
"Do be quiet."
Azul was a pretty good teacher. He ended up not turning into his octopus form until nearly the end of the day, you were practicing your swimming and then just playing around on the sand, building sand castles, anything that you might do at a normal beach outing.
His octopus form was beautiful (as expected), and although you couldn't go to deeper waters, you enjoyed seeing him swim around, always eventually coming back to you.
"Today was truly relaxing, [Y/N]. We should do this again another time."
As always, reblogs and comments are always appreciated! ♡ Send your thoughts grr
Feel free to send requests! Check out this post for info ^^
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buttercup12233 · 30 days
Text
Alastor is such a Gary stu that wants everybody to know that he's "sCaRy" because he can have black eyes and red pupils, turn big, and shoot out tentacles. Like bro. That's not creepy. And most of his lines fucking suck. How does he know about modern slang? Didn't this guy die during the great fucking depression? Not to mention, this guy swears a whole lot. It would've been perfect if the only time he ever swore was when his staff got broken apart. That would've really shocked the audience. I wouldn't mind him saying "fuck" a few times, but when that shit becomes a common thing, that's a problem. Swearing wasn't common in the 1900's. So why is Alastor using it on a daily basis. He no longer stands out from the cast. He's just another edge lord. He says the most corniest lines too like omg everytime he says ONE embarrassing word, I have to pause from watching the show bc the guy gives me second hand embarrassment. He's trying so hard to be terrifying that it's not working. For some reason, Alastor just wants power.... I'm not sure if it was planned from the start, but the execution is dog shit in my opinion. Pilot Alastor was done better than this. The reason why pilot Alastor was so creepy and overall an amazing character, at least in my opinion, was because you didn't really know exactly how he was feeling, or what was going on inside his head. The whole point of him volunteering to 'help' Charlie run the hotel was that he could see sinners fail and give himself some entertainment. He even flat out admits it in the pilot. But then you just have that gut feeling that there's something more going on with Alastor. That he's probably planning something else than just finding entertainment. Let the 'him wanting power' be like a b plot if THAT was the case (explain why he even wants power too bc if he just WANTS it for the sake of it, then that's boring). And I think what was the most exciting thing about his character, was that he was mysterious. Notice how the only times he EVER used his power or lost his cool was when Angel Dust claimed that he could suck his dick, or when Sir Pentious interrupted his song and threatened to literally hurt him. I swear, this guy used his title as the radio demon for times when it was appropriate. That's what I loved about Pilot Al. He wasn't trying to be creepy unless it was needed. In this show, he desperately wants people to fear him. He even tries to pick a fight with everybody, even the ones who are kind to him. He's a complete asshole and a dickhead. And I'm just like "boo, fucking corny, bitch". Idk, man. It's pro just me. But I hate Alastor so goddamn fucking much. At least in the show. He gives me headaches, he's a Gary stu, and I can't believe this mf got away with talking trash to the KING OF HELL like holy SHIT. Why didn't his ass get humbled at the moment there? He just got freewill the whole time during season one without consequences. Besides Adam tearing his ass up.
Alastor is just so- ugh.
I beg for you guys to let me know if some of my points were invalid. I would actively listen to them. I was just in rage the whole entire time while writing this, so my mind was just clouded with 'wtf happened to the cool guy I once loved' and just...RAAAAAH. so please don't hesitate to speak out. I'm aware that not EVERYBODY will agree with what I say. But it's great to hear y'all's opinions about this. Thank you.
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luveline · 8 months
Note
Not sure if I’m doing this right because I’ve never really taken part in one of these but please can I request something for zombie Steve and reader with the below prompt:
𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝'𝐬 𝐨𝐤 —send me a hurt/comfort request for any reader and any character and I'll write a ficlet, 2k or less
Maybe like, some time shortly after they started to become romantically involved or after he first calls her his gf, and Steve has a bad day and is a little short with reader and she’s worrying he’s regretting crossing that line with her but then he reassures her he’s not regretting it.
Sorry if I’m doing this wrong and no worries if you don’t like it, I just seriously love zombie Steve, especially when he’s a lil grumpy grump but always wants to make up for it afterwards 🥰
luveline's 40k party ☆ thank you for your request, you did it perfect don't worry! steve zombie!au —steve gets stressed when food is in short supply, but he cares about you more than you think. fem!reader, 2.5k
cw starving / food insecurity
"I don't think we can make it another day if we don't find something tonight." 
Steve's shoulders go rigid at your statement, backpack reflecting glaring light.. It's dark as night, the room illuminated by two twin flashlight beams. New batteries have the lights constant and consistent. It's a shame you can't live off of batteries. 
You're hungry in a way you've never been hungry before. Never. You and Steve have been starving for days. You have a pounding headache leaking down into your teeth that's made you quiet and Steve is quieter, pointing his flashlight into the next kitchen cabinet. The only thing inside is dust, motes swimming in a sea of white. 
What's worse, you're terrified to hop houses at night, because from afar, deep in the forest surrounding the residential neighbourhood you're in, you've been hearing wolves. Deep howls chasing a filling moon. 
You're so hungry you've had to risk it. 
Your head is heavy on your neck as you look up into another cabinet. "We're gonna die," you say. You can't help it —maybe it's the genuine and inescapable despair of thinking you'll die, maybe it's his recent bout of loving affection, but lately all you do is complain. 
"We're not gonna die," Steve says. 
"You don't know that." 
"Yes, I do." 
"How could you? All these houses have been stripped clean, there's nothing left–" 
"I just know, alright?" 
He slams the cabinet door shut and stalks to the other side of the kitchen. These houses are huge, rich people places with endless bedrooms and their matching ensuites. He shoves his weight into the door leading to the garage. You don't have a choice, following him in. Steve wants space but he can't have it, splitting up makes you feel sick. 
Your hands under his t-shirt, his hands on your back. An admission. I've been calling you my girlfriend in my head for weeks. 
Your Steve's girlfriend. He's your boyfriend, and he's gonna get eaten by a zombie in a garage in the middle of nowhere suburbia and you'll be all alone without him. 
"Steve," you say, irritated. The garage is even darker than the kitchen, no windows for moonlight to crawl inside. He's turned his torch to the storage bins behind a black, sleek car. 
"What?" he asks, using the brunt of his palm to lift a lid.
"What do you mean, what? If I walked away from you like that you'd bite my head off."
"Jesus," he hisses, quickly turning his light away from the bin he's opened. "What the fuck?" 
You creep up behind him to direct your own flashlight. You don't want to talk about what you find inside. 
Defeated and distant and wishing things could be different, you and Steve clip your rucksacks at the waist and prepare to move in the dark from this shitty empty house to the next. You can't sleep; Steve won't say it, but you think he might be scared that you'll both be too weak to get up again if you lay down. This is the final push. 
You don't ask for his hand. He grabs one of your rucksack straps and you slink down the concrete steps of the house back onto the picture perfect streets. An entire apocalypse and the only evidence is smashed glass. The cold night bounces off of the sidewalk to chill your calves, your old jeans little defence against the cold. It's so, so cold lately. 
The next house is locked. You and Steve look at one another, and whether you can see him in the moonlight dregs or if your mind knows him well enough to fill in the gaps is anyone's guess. He looks reluctantly hopeful. 
You take a silent walk around the house checking for points of entry. When each door you come across is locked and each window tightly locked, you kneel at the garage door and force your icy fingers beneath the door. Steve helps, flat of his knife scratching the asphalt. You lose all the feeling in your fingertips as Steve struggles to get his hands under as well, but together you sigh, pained, and lift the garage door with the last of your strength. You army under first quickly, almost dropping the shutters as Steve follows. 
Fingertips aching with quick-blooming contusions, you attempt to help Steve stand. He ignores your offered hand. 
This house is the same as the other, so while it's dark, it's manoeuvrable. Same daunting marble staircases up on to a balconied landing. Across to the left is a lone bedroom with huge windows and a staircase to the attic, and across to the right a handful of equally spacious rooms. You hadn't bothered searching the bedrooms in the houses before, figuring that whoever combed the kitchens to the insane degree they have was as desperate as you are now, and would've already done so. 
But this house was locked. 
You're filled with aching hope. You need to eat. You don't want to die. You don't want Steve to die. If there's nothing here, you aren't sure you'll have the energy to search another granite kitchen. 
Steve wastes no time opening a cabinet. 
You both stand still in shock. 
Cereal. Boxes and boxes of cereal. 
"What do you think the sell by date is?" you ask. 
"I don't know." He pulls down a box. It's off by a year. Pulls down another. Off again. Something awful inside of you wants to tear into the cardboard and eat it anyways. Too bad food poisoning can kill you quicker than hunger. 
Steve leaves the cabinet door open and moves to the next, practically ripping it off of the hinges. Your torch beam shakes with excitement when you see the insides, golden cans stacked high. 
Steve picks one up. Tosses it aside. "It's cat food." 
Well, if all else fails. The thought makes you want to cry. 
The next cabinet is full of glassware, and the next china plates. Steve opens a fifth and sixth at the same time. It takes you a second to calibrate the sight in front of you. 
"It's not more cat food, is it?" you ask quietly. 
Steve breathes out hard, grabbing a handful of skinny cans, metal popping against the counter as he drops one. "It's fish. Tuna fish." 
And just like that, you get to live. 
The last cabinet has a short supply of soups and bare essentials, enough for a week between you both (rich people ate less processed foods, apparently). It's the fish that promises security, a hundred cans of bluefin, yellowfin tuna, a couple cans of caviar. 
You and Steve eat it in the kitchen with fancy spoons. The smell is undesirable but it doesn't make you feel sick until hours later, half asleep on the kitchen floor. 
You stand up, ushering him with you, and pull yourselves with heavy emphasis on the handrail up the stairs to the first bedroom you come across. You take your toothbrush from your bag despite the begging pull of sleep and brush your teeth, eager to escape the salty tang of fish. If Steve wants to kiss you tonight, you'd rather taste like Arctic Fresh than fish. 
"Can I have some?" Steve asks. 
You raise your brows, squeezing toothpaste onto his brush. While he brushes, you construct a little lamp using the low-power torch and a half full water bottle. The room is far less intimidating after that, light reaching into the corners and exposing the raw wooden beams above. Steve spits his toothpaste into the wastebasket and leaves the room. He returns as you're taking off your shoes, disapproving as he drags a chair in. He hooks it under the door handle, jigging it to test. 
"I can't wear them anymore," you say. 
"Okay," he says. 
You'd hoped finding food would make him less snappy, but no luck. He's even quieter than before. 
You get changed in silence, like you've both decided now you're not hungry that actually you'd been kind of filthy. It's just… your reality. You want to be clean, and fed, and brushed, but you're grimy. You settle for another layer of deodorant and a fresh pair of underwear. 
Steve is looking at you, half-naked. He's allowed, it doesn't matter, but he averts his eyes when you catch him and doesn't speak to you again. Thankfully, your sated hunger removes despair to some extent. You climb into bed and Steve slides in next to you, and for a few hours, you sleep. 
Waking up is a new agony. 
You're bad at being separated from one another, and finding him gone fucks you up. Your heart immediately leaps into your mouth, a raw, beating thing. The daylight disarms you at first, blinking against it, but proves to be your friend when you find Steve's shoes at the end of the bed. It's a marker, a note from him to you: I'm still here.
He's leaning heavily on the countertop in the kitchen  with a notebook laid flat and a pen in hand, tallying up the cans.
"Hey, you scared me," you say, his shoes in one hand, yours in the other.  
"Sorry." 
You put the shoes on the counter. 
You hesitate to touch him first. You'd been thinking last night before you slept, his hand near your hip instead of on it, that Steve's finally realised he doesn't want to be with you. Like a near death experience, he'd had an epiphany. Why would he want to spend the bare strands of a life that he has playing house with you? 
He didn't have a choice. One sudden day and you were his burden.
Steve takes your hand without looking. Firm, he squeezes his fingers between yours and pulls you into his side. "It's a month's worth of food, easily. But it might make us kind of sick if we aren't careful. There's Mercury in it. Less than the cheap stuff, but we still shouldn't be eating so much." His arm presses to yours. He meets your eyes over his shoulder. "I hate fish." 
"You're talking to me today." 
He looks down at the notebook, his eyebrows pinching in like you've stepped on his foot. "I– sorry. I wasn't very nice, yesterday, I guess." 
You're relieved to hear his apology, not because you really even want one, but because it means he isn't as mad at you as you thought. "I was complaining." 
"It was all shit. You're allowed. I… was stressed." 
"It was all shit," you agree, explaining away his bad mood. But, last night, he didn't wanna hold you. It sounds pathetic but on a small scale, this is your life. Any change feels foreign. 
"I wasn't mad at you for complaining." 
You feel the back of his hand with your thumb. Fine hairs, skin rough from a few weeks of the elements. "Thanks for clarifying." 
"I'm serious."
"So am I." 
Steve looses go of your hand to put his arm on your shoulder. His fingertips skirt against your back, tickling gently. His eyes are serious but his mouth curves with a smile. "Why are you upset?" he asks. 
"I'm not." 
"I think I'd know." 
It seems silly now to tell him with his touch, his face this close to yours. You take in a shuddering breath and his expression pinches. 
Steve stands as close to you as he can without hugging you. "Hey, tell me," he says. 
You push your tongue against your teeth, thinking. Tears threaten to collect, a burning lump bobbing in your throat at his question. 
"Do you ever regret this?" you ask. "Sometimes I think you do." 
"This?" he asks.
"Me and you." 
Steve laughs, and that really is foreign what with the last few days of moroseness you've had. It's not a humoured laugh, just a shocked one, the sound inking his words as he says, "We're not something up for regretting." 
"What's that mean?" 
"It means," —Steve ducks his head a little, eye to eye with you as his arm curls behind your neck— "it's not even an option. Us, me and you, you alone, it's not an option. I don't regret what's happened or what's happening between us. I wish… I wish I'd been less of a dick to you. I wish I was nicer to you now, and that's a shitty thing to say, but this–" Hid eyes flare with annoyance directed inward. "I get fucking abysmally moody because I can't believe I'm this bad at taking care of you."
You lift your chin ever so slightly and Steve kisses you. Sweet but a little rough, like he'd been waiting for an offer. 
"I don't regret this," he mumbles, tapping the tip of his nose under yours. You lift your head, and he fits another kiss to the seam of your lips. 
"You didn't wanna hug me or anything last night–" 
He hugs you immediately. "I'm sorry," he says over your ear. "It was just a bad day." 
"But I'm here with you. I'm having the bad day with you, I want to be there for you," you say, semi-desperate. 
"I'm sorry," he says again, relaxing as your arms fold behind his back. 
Steve pets your back. You wish things were different, that he could be hugging you somewhere different. You can picture it, Steve dropping you off at some college class or putting his hand in your back pocket on the way to dinner. Things could be so much better and they never, ever will be. 
You don't ask, afraid to even suggest it if he hasn't thought of it, but you worry Steve is with you out of habit. Bad habits are hard to break, but anyone can stop smoking if they really want to. He could move on.
He must read your mind. 
"Sorry," Steve whispers, leaning back to kiss your cheek. "I'm a shitty boyfriend sometimes when I'm trying to be good at keeping us alive. You're the only good thing. I'm really sorry, honey." 
You nibble on the inside of your lip and hug him harder. "Stop saying sorry. You didn't do anything wrong, I just think too much." 
He breathes out in surprise at your ferocity, dropping his head into the curve of your neck. 
"I'm sorry," he says anyway.
Unbeknownst to you, it's in lieu of a different confession. 
You crack a smile. Steve pulls away to fret over your face uselessly, wiping away things you can't see and smiling back like a guy in the movies, all confident and flirtatious. It's a stark difference to the previous gloom. 
"Let's go find some water," he says, taking the side of your face into his palm. "I smell bad and you're shiny." 
"Nice, Steve."
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weebsinstash · 10 months
Text
As much as I want to have children by this man, let's take a moment to sip our platonic yandere Miguel juice
-i can't decide which sex he'd be more partial to in a 'child'/you since in the movie there was Gabriella but in the comics he eventually has a son who becomes the next Spiderman but--
-as a girl i just naturally think of a lot of those sorts of gender specific ideas 👉👈 he's this big scary hulking intimidating threat and his "daughter" is the one melting his cold exterior
-doesnt matter if you're a grown ass woman, Miguel sees you struggling to braid your hair and suddenly here he is, full dad mode, doing it for you,and depending on how close you two are, maybe he disguises it with "ugh, stop spending so much time messing around with that. If I do it for you will you get back to work? 🙄", but really it's just your new self proclaimed dad/tio wanting to help braid your hair and help you feel pretty and, oh, how he can fondly remember the last time he helped braid "his daughter's" hair...
-of course this evolves to him just loving to do things with your hair. Braid it, wear it natural, style it, use products on it, hes got you. you were just trying to put your hair in a lazy updo like a ponytail or bun and this man doesn't let you leave until he's got you completely combed out, hair braided with ribbons, and of course this entire time youre awkwardly sitting there in a chair in his absolute cave of a workstation with this gargantuan 6'9 man there, "so how was your day? Staying out of trouble?"
-really I mean. Is stealing other people's kids NOT technically in character for him. You're unfortunate enough to trauma bond with this man and you're never getting rid of him
-you hear Miles Morales call him tio (as in the tio meaning dude) and you jokingly teasingly start calling him tio, which Miguel secretly pretends is the version that means uncle. You're just constantly joking around or looking up at him with these big pouty eyes, "but tio 🥺 can't I PLEASE--" and its like. Lmao people know that if they need to ask Miguel for a favor, that it increases their chances to have you ask in their stead
- I mean, as a female adult abused as a child by my own father, raised by a single mom myself, like...
Reader flinches away when Peter B goes to give you a supportive pat on the back or comes in for a high five after a mission and you force yourself to laugh because you're feeling more than just a little awkward and in the spotlight. "Oh, sorry, that was dumb!" And they eventually get you to kind of anxiously word vomit "my dad used to just kind of, rough me up sometimes when I did something wrong! It-it could've been a lot worse honestly, but, it-it just makes me kinda jumpy around guys sometimes! It's not a big deal, or personal or anything. I'm sorry if I made you feel bad 🥺"
Peter B, Jessica, and Miguel all there as older parental figures and also literal parents, immediately exchange looks and agree like "oh hell naw, don't like that" and you get silently adopted by all three of em right then and there
-if it's a physically abusive father and you're still the victim of abuse, I imagine your dad had some suspicious figures suddenly show up in the middle of the night to terrify and threaten the shit out of him and suddenly you aren't getting as manhandled anymore
-can you imagine, like, you show up to Spider Society one day with a black eye "oh, this? It's, it's nothing. My dad is just, he's about to make police captain and he's really stressed about it is all" cue all your friends mentally high fiving around the table because your abusive piece of shit dad is going to die and you don't even know. When it happens they'll all be "oh no, sweetie, I'm SOOOO sorry :(" meanwhile they're thrilled bc now you don't have any parents and they can weasel in there as your new family, schedule your birthday parties, monopolizing more of your time, things like that
-goddd I just imagine it could become some kind of weird fucked up enmeshed scenario where the structure it's providing for your life is actually good for you meanwhile Miguel is like, retroactively kind of soothing some of his trauma both from his own childhood and what happened with the second universe he broke that it's just like. You're a grown ass adult and this man is tucking you in goodnight and saying "te amo, mija" at the doorway and you bet his ass is going to stand there and not let you sleep until you say it back. He knows you're just absolutely seething at him and he'll still refuse to leave without a grumbling "te amo, papá 🙄"
-He eventually just has you doing so much shit and depending on him so much that it starts to become second nature to you. one day you're in the Society doing one of the odd jobs you're allowed to help with and suddenly you're thinking, "Ugh I actually don't know what to do next, I wish Papá was here to-- WAIT SHIT NO I MEAN MIGUEL--"
-lmaooooo as a non Spanish speaker I keep thinking of how awwwwwful it would be if he actually forces you to learn Spanish. Not inherently because there's anything wrong with Spanish, but, I'm not always smart, and I can just SEE him quizzing your ass, forcing you to have entire conversations in Spanish, always clicking his tongue or chuckling at you when you make a mistake and he just thinks you're so cute struggling to learn 🥰 man hears you're trying to take extra lessons from Miles and he instantly drops everything he's doing to go track the little scamp down. Insert meme "I can forgive being an anomaly but I draw the line at teaching Reader bad Spanish"
-siiiiiiigh eventually the day comes when you're in big danger and you need his help, maybe you disobeyed him and was hanging out with some other Spiders in another dimension when there was a sudden villain attack, and he comes to your rescue as a villain does something dramatic like has a gun to your head or a knife to your neck and the second you see him you're just overwhelmed wirh a sense of relief, calling out for him, calling him dad/tio/papá whatever, and he's just like 😭❤️ pumping his fist internally, like YES you are so grounded when you get back home but also 🥰 you finally called him dad without him having to twist your arm 🥰 nevermind if the "villain" who kidnapped you was actually a Spider who owed him a favor, and this whole thing was to teach you a lesson about listening to your Papá, that's not important ❤️
-Miguel who forces you to learn Spanish vs Miguel who forces you to be Catholic. I can excuse kidnapping and forced adoption but I draw the line at making me practice religion 💀 no but seriously, he probably does have certain morals and values he instills/forces upon you if he thinks you need them, and he'll probably be one of those fathers, "are you leaving the house dressed like that? Go change" and orders you not to hang out with certain people he doesn't approve of or thinks have bad character (like hobie lmao)
-bruh you two will be on a super serious important mission and this man will be like "it's dark, hold my hand so we dont get separated"
Eventually it comes to a point where you're, not perfectly behaved but, just about. If someone finds Miguel, it means you're not very far away, or vice versa. Members of the Society quickly learn not to make any advances on you or make any "adult" comments unless they want to get suspiciously hurt during a personal training session by the big boss himself. You think you're safe just cause Miguel isn't around? Nah, cause then you have Peter B and Jess keeping an eye on you, and, not that YOU'RE aware of the extent, but, if Miguel ever gets worried, he can just ask Lyla what you've been getting up to, since your modified little daypass has her installed into it and she can track your every move ❤️ helicopter parent? Oh honey, you have NO idea...
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beomboomboom · 2 months
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Cockroach
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genre: fluff, established relationship
pairing: idol!Joshua x reader
summary: Joshua hates cockroaches. Never in a million years would he ever be able to kill one, but thank goodness he has you to take care of that.
warnings: mentions of cockroaches, a little bit of swearing
note: Definitely not me projecting from all the times I have been absolutely terrified when I would spot cockroaches in my room 👀. I hope you enjoy reading <33
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When stuck in a crisis, Joshua considers himself to be very calm and quick to problem-solve.
But when that crisis is a cockroach, all those previous statements are thrown out the window. Joshua is not calm in any way, and he is way too panicked to even have the capacity to think of a solution at that point.
"WAHHH-,"Joshua screeches as he practically leaps out of his seat and frantically runs to the other side of the room,"AHHH ITS COMING CLOSER WHAT THE HECK, GET AWAY YOU FILTHY CREATURE."
Hearing all the commotion, you quickly enter the living room to be met with a sight that makes you laugh and want to protect your boyfriend at the same time. Joshua is cowering behind a beanbag, his eyes wide with fear and hatred, as he looks over to the floor where a big brown cockroach is crawling towards him.
"SAVEMESAVEME," Joshua screams, pleading, once he catches sight of your figure in the room. Abandoning his beanbag that he was using as a barrier, he quickly rushes to your side and hides behind you, using you as a barrier instead.
"Honey, it's just a cockroach, everything will be fine. I'll kill it okay?" you reassure Joshua as you take hold of the heaviest thing closest to you—a SEVENTEEN album.
"OH YOU ARE NOT GOING TO KILL A COCKROACH WITH THAT-,"Joshua hisses while snatching the album out of your hands.
"WELL THEN WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO-."you begin to reply before getting interrupted by Joshua's screams of terror.
"'-AHHH ITS RIGHT THERE," Joshua screeches from behind as he wraps his arms around your waist tightly and digs his head into your shoulder, scared out of his mind.
"WHERE?! WHERE IS "THERE","you yell back in reply, Joshua's panic rubbing off on you. Frantically, you grab hold of the first thing you can get your hands on—a random box of crayons, as you try and locate the cockroach.
"THERE," Joshua screams again while pointing in the direction of the cockroach, which is now moving faster than ever before, probably feeling panicked because of Joshua's screams.
Smashing the box of crayons on top of the cockroach firmly, a moment of fearful silence falls upon you and Joshua.
"I-Is it dead?"Joshua questions nervously while looking over your shoulder, finally breaking the silence.
Lifting the crayon box slowly, both you and Joshua let out a sigh of relief the second you both spot the dead and smushed cockroach on the crayon box.
Defeated after the whole ordeal, Joshua flops onto his back. "You're a lifesaver, I thought I was going to die for a moment there."
You let out a laugh before rolling your eyes, "a tiny cockroach won't kill you."
Muttering a small "sure feels like it though" in reply, Joshua then gently tugs your body down so that you can lay your head on his chest.
As your head lays comfortably on Joshua's chest, Joshua can't help but notice how you and him laying together feels so warm and cozy. Sitting up, Joshua leans over your figure and presses a soft kiss onto your forehead. "I love you," he whispers with a gentle smile.
Smiling softly, you quickly reciprocate the kiss, but on the lips rather than forehead. "I love you too," you say with a laugh.
Just as Joshua is about to reconnect his lips with yours again, you gently pull away. "Joshua...I think you forgot I still have the dead cockroach in my hands"
"OH FUCK NO-, GET THAT AWAY FROM ME"
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Note
"when strangers mistake me for his father i don't correct them" just break my goddamn heart why don't you. i love this and the rest of your art so so SO much and i'm dying to hear more of your thoughts on tintin and haddock's father-son/chaotic uncle-nephew dynamic, because it's one thing i wish had been developed further in canon, especially with tintin's move to marlinspike hall
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Haddock and Tintin invented the found family trope! Their dynamic means so much to me, while my post canon series seems to be about Tintin and Chang's relationship it's actually more about Tintin and Haddock's found family bond and how it changes as Tintin grows older.
My thoughts on their dynamic are under the cut. It's Fathers' Day in the UK this Sunday, so happy Fathers' Day!
Haddock had a terrible childhood and has low self esteem, but values his ability as a sailor. Even that is shaken when his crew mutinies and kidnaps a teenager. As a result Haddock feels an enormous sense of guilt and responsibility for Tintin
He looks up to Tintin a lot, he inspires Haddock to always strive to be better!
He doesn't understand what Tintin sees in him but Tintin's positivity easily outshines any doubts about their friendship. Tintin brings that childlike wonder Haddock missed out on in his own childhood. Haddock goes out of his way to do stuff with Tintin he never got to do with his father, like going to the theatre or trips to the seaside.
Initially Tintin tolerates Haddock, but he proves himself with his sailing prowess in The Shooting Star. While Tintin is brave and proactive he's very introverted and closed off from people, having gained dangerous enemies at such a young age.
At first he's not used to having someone look out for him but grows to deeply appreciate Haddock. A colleague at work said Haddock is like that one middle aged guy you befriend at a job you got as a teenager and you become ride or die with through trauma bonding and I think he's exactly right!
Even though he's his best friend Tintin still keeps him at a distance. Haddock doesn't know his legal name or anything about his past. Tintin rarely opens up about personal problems out of fear of worrying him.
As Haddock has pinned so much of his self worth on Tintin, in my post canon series Haddock is forced to re-examine his friendship with him.
Haddock gets into a secret romantic relationship with Ramo Nash and gets some well earned down time from adventures, taking up painting as a hobby. It's the first time he's had time to find himself outside of being Tintin's adventuring companion, and realises he may have to make the painful decision between his best friend or staying true to himself. It's a decision he knew he had to make for a long time.
Haddock invites Chang to live in Marlinspike during his year as an exchange student in hopes he'll keep Tintin out of trouble. When Chang ends up joining in on the adventures instead Haddock is taken aback by how competent he is, and how seemingly effortlessly he is able to keep up with Tintin. Watching a younger fitter person does bring up some insecurities in him, but he later appreciates that this means he could sometimes take a break and let Chang go get shot at instead!
Tintin's tendency to keep his personal problems to himself drives a rift between them as he desperately tries to navigate coming to terms with being gay. Even though homosexuality was legal in Belgium at the time there's still a stigma, and Haddock and Tintin are terrified of losing each other's respect.
When Haddock finds out Tintin is also gay he is overjoyed, he vows to look out and to always be a safe haven for him. He grew up in fear and in the closet, so is determined to be the father figure he never had himself.
Haddock is very supportive of Tintin and Chang, but as Tintin grows closer to Chang and spends more time with him Haddock can't help but feel a little insecure. It's normal for parental figures to feel that way.
As Haddock grows older and less physically able to travel, Tintin worries if his deteriorating health is his fault. Haddock makes sure to nip this fear in the bud, and lets him know how proud he is of what they were able to do. As Haddock settles into retirement with Ramo, Tintin and Chang visit frequently to help take care of them.
Haddock never officially adopts Tintin despite everything, just in case the Haddock family curse still persists. Also "Tintin Haddock" is an absolutely awful sounding name.
Neither Haddock or Tintin can stand spiders. They get Nestor or Calculus to deal with that
imagine All of Tintin's Father Figures in a group chat in a modern AU, Haddock, Calculus, Skut, Mr Wang, Ramo Nash... The Council of Dads (Castafiore is in it too, she counts)
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idyllcy · 5 months
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for all time/lovebrush chronicles boys as cliché tropes
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word count: 645
summary: lovebrush boys as cliche tropes !
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Ai Yin / Ayn - Competitors - Whaaat? Why not Clarence ?? HEAR ME OUT.
You're a musician. You're like the musician ever— probably a pianist just to piss him off. The two of you always tie first for piano competitions. There's no argument. If he's there, you're there. If he's first, you're first. The two of you are both prodigy pianists and there's no room for argument. Thus arises the issue. Your name is always followed by his— or his name is always followed by yours. You guys hate it. Or so you say. Because when you're missing from a competition for the first time in years, he's very much confused as to where you are, and it almost feels empty without you. Wha— what did he just say? That was definitely not him.
Lu Chen / Alkaid - Deskmates - oh that's so cliché (I know)
The two of you are paired up as deskmates for the year. It's a little awkward at first until you get used to him, and then it just breaks into everyone else eating dog food (third-wheeling). He brings you breakfast because you skip eating it, and you fix his tie when it's crooked... he always picks calls for you when he needs an extra hand, you always drop everything you have to help him... you two are practically dating. Which raises the question. are you dating? Or is Alkaid just taking care of you because he thinks you're forgetful and clumsy? The love letter slipped into your desk seems to say otherwise, though.
Luo Xia / Lars - Arranged Marriage - I didn't think this could get more cliché
You get arranged into a marriage with him for one reason— your family's going bankrupt, so they have to sell their only child to the Luos because like. Idk that's a cliché, it's a trope, IT'S HAPPENING TO YOU. PERIOD. At first you're like terrified and he's super scary and cold and lowkey kind of rude, but he still kind of cares since when you first move in, he has the servants move all of your stuff, and yu almost feel like you're home. He's just not very vocal about liking you though; so when your family's business breaks out of bankruptcy and you're told you can divorce him if you want, and then he's like "no please don't take my spouse from me ☹️" and then next thing you know you're being pampered to the moon and back. (You end up staying with him.)
Si Lan / Clarence - Love at First Sight - HEAR ME OUT ON THIS.
You're an unassuming new student at school, completely unbothered. You do not know he's the student council president. You're just at the nurse's office because your mom's the nurse or smth. Then, he's admitted into the office because he overworked himself on accident, and you're like "errrr I'll help. sure" And what does he see upon first waking up? You. The sun behind your head gives you a halo, and you look angelic. He thinks he's hallucinating. "God, did I die?" "Erm... not quite!" Then you nurse him back to health, and he's having a moment (he can't forget you) but dw you eventually end up together 👍
Ye Xuan / Cael - Brother's Best Friend - you did not (oh yes I did)
Cael, your brother's calm best friend who seems to have no interest in dating anyone at all. Cael, your brother's best friend who's been there for you as long as you can remember. Cael, your brother's best friend who helps you through college hell, voice calm and soothing as you cry about the homework. Cael, your brother's best friend who never lets himself slip when you're around (regardless of how bad he actually likes you) Cael, your brother's best friend who tries his best to resist you when you're on top of him, breath heavy with alcohol and almost drunk. Cael, your brother's best friend who doesn't fight it when you pull him in for a kiss at the door when he comes to check up on you the next day. and Cael, who can't say no to you when you spill out your feelings for him on paper, spilling out his own when you meet up with him.
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First I Love You
Bayverse TMNT × Fem!Reader
This is self indulgent garbage I have made to keep myself distracted.
It varies from Drama to Fluff to Angst and Pre established relationship to a fucking year into being official to Y/N to she/her. No spicy tho. Good luck lol
-Raphael-
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It wasn't panic.
It wasn't. He felt excitement. Raphael was bursting with energy. Stomach in knots, head pounding, chest pushing and pulling oxygen as if it was hard.
It wasn't panic. Leo concluded the huddle with a nod. "Let's do this!"
"Turtle power!" The group shouted. Turtle and human alike branched off in different directions.
Raph looked over at you.
"Raph, I-"
"C'mon people, let's go!" Vern called.
Raph didn't know what to do, heart racing and blood surging. Making him jittery. He half-heartly ran after his brothers.
He couldn't help but glance back.
You had taken a step back closer to Vern. You were watching them go, frightened. He understood.
He could die or get taken away- this might be the last he would ever see any of these people ever again. Last time he would ever see you.
"You don't have to do that." You had laughed, smiling as he lifted your couch.
"You're not gonna do it." He teased, watching your dog fetch it's toy happily.
"It's an upper east side candy shop." Raph explained one night. "I know you like sweets."
You gave him the biggest puppy eyes, smile ear-to-ear, holding the snacks to your chest. "You're my hero."
God, had he wanted to kiss you. He almost did one time. Almost spilled his guts when you blinked tiredly up at him. The scales of his arm were imprints along your face. Marks a movie lengths worth in the making. They wouldn't fade for several minutes. It was so cute.
Your hand grabbed his once. Tugging him to the edge of the water, in an effort to show him something. Probably. He couldn't remember. He hid his shyness under the banter. Soaking up the feeling of your hand in his.
Raph couldn't stop thinking about you, anymore. He knew you felt something too. He was more than happy about that.
But it wasn't meant to be. He knew better.
"We can't do this." Raph had whispered two days ago. Pulling his hand away from your fingers. Pulling away from what had almost been a kiss. "It's wrong."
Something numb fell over your expression. Blocking him out. It broke his heart as you pulled your lips tight. Looking down and nodding. "Okay."
Raph had faced impossible odds before. But this was bigger. Scarier. He knew there was a chance he could never make it. A good one if this plan doesn't go well.
No.
He needed to do this.
His feet started to do their own thing.
"Raph?" Donnie called. Confused.
You turned back around, suddenly swallowed up in Raphael's shadow. "Raph, w-"
"I love you."
Her eyes widened, staring up at Raph.
"I'm fucking crazy about you." He whispered, terrified. "I fell in love with you, and I'm sorry I-"
"Raph-"
"You're the best thing to ever happen to me, and I've been wishing I could be the guy you deserve, but I'm not, so...so I just want you to know -"
"I-I love you too." She whispered, rushing forward.
Raph blinked. Relief overwhelming him before he could register what had been said.
"I love you so fucking much." His best friends small hands were quickly on his cheeks; the sensation like lightning on his scales.
It...probably wasn't the best kiss, in hindsight. He had done nothing but stare wide-eyed in disbelief as it happened, was happening, and happened.
She pulled back, her hands petting his face. His hands holding her head too. Her eye contact made his limbs go numb when she whispered, "Just come back to me, okay?"
Just come back to me.
"Uh...Okay."
She choked out a laugh, letting go of his face and pushing at his chest. "Now go get 'em tiger." It made Raph choke and smile back.
"Raph!" Leo shouted.
Ignoring Vern's expression of horror. Raph nodded to himself. "Okay." He said again. "Okay." He sprinted after his brothers on legs he couldn't feel, new energy driving him forward.
-Michelangelo-
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You weren't naive.
You knew he wouldn't be accepted by most of your family. You knew that a few individuals might even be dangerous to Mikey and his family.
But the key word was most.
The newest generations, relatives your age, were much more accepting of many things. Within reason.
With your boyfriends...predicament- it took some extra effort on your part to set up a meeting of some kind. A meeting in which both parties had nowhere to go but through the uncomfortable interaction. With no room for reactive actions. No access to immediate exits, phones, or weapons-
Good thing you were dating an actual angle.
Mikey could work a room so easily, it overwhelmed you. He had your siblings charmed within seconds; cracking wise while the first gawking and terrified reactions were water off his shell.
Now, your boyfriends social circle was that much bigger.
One thing led to another. Weeks went by, then months. It's how you two ended up here. You on your siblings couch curled up with a book. Chaos all around you.
"Aaand...boo!" Mikey leapt out from behind the doorway.
"AHHahah!" One of your neices squeeled and ran away, hands covering her face.
"C'mere, you." Mikey growled, his smile just as wide as he dramatically stomped after the four kids, his hands perfect T-rex claws. His shadow easily swallowing them as they hurried away.
"Mikey, you can't eat them!" Your nephew wasn't older than five, but he chased after the giant turtle man as they rounded the couch you were sitting on.
Mikey tackled your nephew to the ground expertly, the boy roaring in delight; getting tickled ferociously.
"Ahhh! Stopp!!" The boy was desperately trying to worm away from your boyfriend. "That hurts!"
Mikey let go, and the boy continued to giggle as he caught his breath, struggling to get up.
"Ya a'right?" Mikey smiled.
"AHHH!" One neice came out of nowhere, pouncing on Mikey's arm.
"Oh NOO!" Mikey cried as he fell expertly over, making the little girl laugh. Your nephew screamed in triumph, jumping on his shoulders.
The other two saw the action, and pounced.
"We gotchu!!"
"Oh no, oh no!!" Mikey whined, struggling carefully for their entertainment as the kids climbed on top of him. He went limp, a gross sound in his thoat.
The kids squeeled, tiny hands slapping him playfully. "We know you're not dead, Mikey!"
He didn't reply.
Your neice shook his shoulder. "My-ee?"
"RAH!" Mikey jolted awake, and they all screamed and scrambled away.
"Get back here!" He called.
The kids scrambled to another room, leaving you and your boyfriend facing each other where he was kneeling on the carpet.
"How are you doing?" Mikey asked, still smiling. He had glitter stickers all over him. And marker ink was all over his shoulder.
Your heart had swelled, closing your throat and misting your eyes. He looked good like this. Happy.
"I love you." You muttered.
Mikey jolted, his eyes blowing wide. "...W-what?"
"I love you." You repeated with a smile, voice breaking.
Mikey's jaw dropped, his hands lifting a little from his knees. "We're- I-I-I love you-"
"UNGUARDD!"
A pool noodle slapped Mikey's head from behind.
You laughed.
-Donatello-
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"All done." You whispered.
"Thank you."
You didn't look at him, setting down the needle and blood-soaked fabric.
You and Donnie were sheltered in the lab. Curtain drawn. He sat maskless and blind in his chair. Hands clasped between his spread knees.
He'd been quiet. Avoiding your gaze.
You stared at what would be a new scar on his face. Down his cheek and neck. You mourned the marring of some turtle stripes under his jaw.
Blood was crusted between scales around your messy stitches; and you slowly got to work of gently dabbing it away. One hand on his other cheek to keep him still.
You couldn't handle it alone anymore. Hurt that had weld up in your chest suddenly surged. Your voice began working again.
"Why didn't you tell me?" You whispered.
He didn't answer. But you felt a muscle clench under your fingers.
You bit your lip. Tears welling up at last.
Your proposal that fateful night hadn't been unique. At all. But the offer of another date night was ignored by him completely.
Ghosted. You had gone to April. Worried that something might have happened.
April's number apparently didn't exist anymore. Her face gone from her regular network. Nothing was said about it. As if you had made everything up.
You didn't have any other numbers. You didn't know where to find anyone. You'd begun to accept he had let you go. All of them. Suddenly. But they were gone, none the less.
You were not needed; and Donatello hadn't wanted you.
Then tonight, two hours ago; you'd received a mystery caller. Three times. Leo. Imploring. Needing more hands, because Donnie was down and out for the count. You had never heard the leaders voice like this.
Karai was now dead.
Everyone is home safe.
You felt tears finally spill down your cheeks. You pulled away, sniffing as you scrubbed harshly at your cheeks.
Donnie reacted to the sound as if shot.
"Y/N it wasn't -"
"You didn't tell me." You hissed. "That's all I need to know."
"It's not like that!" Donnie said urgently. "I couldn't -"
"I needed one text. N-not even that, just... something. Anything." You hissed. "I don't even ask for an explanation! Just saying it's unsafe to talk would have been more than enough. Y-you and I even have a safeword-!"
"I couldn't do that!" Donnie said. "They had tracked Splinter and April through our communications. My firewalls should have prevented the Foot from - I didn't - I didn't know, and I couldn't endanger another person I love the same way."
A person I love.
You gasped, chest heaving with built-up sobs. Physical pain struck you at his words. Shock. Denial. Two weeks. Nothing -
"You don't love me!" You choked. Insistant.
Donnie blinked, mouth dropping slightly open as he stared at you wide-eyed.
He took in a shaky breath. "Yes, I do."
You sobbed, squeezing your eyes shut as you scrubbed some tears away. "No, you don't, c'mon." It was the weakest you've ever sounded.
Donnie's hands snagged your elbows. Pulling you to face him so his hands could rest on either side of your head.
"You were in danger." His voice shook. "You were in so much danger - and I'd rather you think I left or was gone than ever - ever, see you hurt. Especially because I was too fucking s-stupid to protect you or my family."
You were silent. Staring at him like he was the last thing left alive.
He bit his lip, wet eyes sparkling with the most conviction you'd ever seen. "I love you so much. You're the best thing to ever happen to me, and I promised myself I would keep you safe, no matter what. If...If I could redo all of this, I wouldn't change anything." His voice broke. "It'll be different from now on, but...the thought of you somewhere out there hating me is better than the thought of you...not being here at all."
You hiccuped, face wet with renewed tears as you pushed forward. Kissing him.
-Leonardo-
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Leo hadn't liked you at first. At all, really. Comes with the territory, you thought. You didn't blame him.
The trust built slowly every month. Half a year went by before you could easily call him your friend, and you were good friends.
The problem was that you had started crushing on him. Hard.
One night, Leo had stopped you; rain pouring down as he - very awkwardly...asking you out.
You could tell that he had been terrified. It made your smile that much wider. Because you were terrified too. Over the moon. Finally.
You later found out the guy had actually the corniest, cutest list of dates he had been hoping to take you on. All written in a neat, dorky list in one of his notebooks. When you confronted him - he couldn't meet your eyes he had been so embarrassed.
Leo had been the one to ask if he could kiss you.
You had fallen in love. Not quickly. But you had admitted to yourself - looking up into those pretty blue eyes - that you were crazy in love.
And yet...
Leo still hadn't taken off his mask.
You asked once. "Am I ever going to see you without it?"
"Hell no." He huffed at you while he set your house plant back down.
"Scared I might find out you're a turtle?" You scoffed. "I have some crazy news."
"Nice try, but that kind of show-" Leo reached above you to grab a cup, then pointed it at your smug grin. "Isn't for free. VIP only."
"I'm not a VIP girlfriend?" You were outraged.
The curiosity was always there. But you didn't push. You knew it would happen eventually.
That moment came a week later. When you ran your nails across his scalp.
You quickly did it a second time after his tiny noise of happy surprise. A gentle scratch. Only slight pressure to the green skin.
"What're you doing back there?" Leo twisted, peering up at you from where he sat on the floor infront of you.
You kept at it. Smiling as you switched between scratching and petting his scalp, adding a second hand. "Just touching you. That okay?"
Leo's eyes fluttered before he turned back to the TV. His shell between your knees.
As time passed, Leo's head lowered. His neck weakening. He obviously wasn't watching anymore.
"You okay?" You giggled quietly.
"Mm."
"C'mere." You pat your lap. "Turn around."
Leo did. He paused, facing you. You stared back, smiling before pressing a hard loud kiss to the side of his snout. Pushing his head slightly with its force, making him smile and laugh.
God, you loved that laugh.
Your hands opened and closed dramatically over his form as he slumped his head into your lap, curling up close. You nearly giggled at how large his head was as he rested his cheek on a thigh.
There was one problem....
"Hey," you whispered. "May I move the mask?"
Leo froze.
"I can work with it." You quickly said, cringing. "You're okay."
"No," Leo said. "No, it's okay. Hang on."
Your heart leapt into your throat in surprise. But you bit your lip. You didn't want to scare him as he sat up and used one hand to loosen the knot.
Leo pulled it off swiftly. Never looking at you.
You stared.
You had convinced yourself it wouldn't be a huge deal seeing his face. It was a small mask. How much could it really hide?
Apparently, a lot. You felt your brain adjust to the ridiculous fact that it had been unprepared to have so much green to look at.
Leo moved to lean back down. You stopped him. That's when he looked at you.
Leo's eyes hadn't changed a bit. You realized that they looked even more gorgeous like this.
You're heart squeezed.
You'd been dying to tell him. Now more than ever.
"Hi." You whispered, smiling and petting his cheeks.
"C'mon," Leo winced. "It's not..."
"Tell me it at least feels better off..." the backs of your fingers pet down his cheeks before you pushed your nails along each side of his head. Across his temples and then along his scalp again. "It sure looks better off."
His eyes rolled closed. He pushed further into the contact, a pretty groan slipping out.
He stayed there. Leaned a little bit forward as he sat on the floor. His head being pet and scratched from where you sat in front of him on the couch. You pressed a few kisses across brow and nose when you felt his weight going lax once more.
Then holding his jaw, you pressed your lips firmly against his forehead.
Leo signed.
This was it. Time to tell him. You took a deep breath.
"I love you." Leo whispered.
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