#i legit cannot think about them being friends for too long at a time

[softcenteregg]

//Please don't apologize to me about my life.//

I need everyone to understand how much I love that they’re friends.

#op #one piece #one piece nami #one piece jinbe #jinbe #jinbei #nami #op nami #op jinbe #stronger together #they make my heart hurt so much #this is far to large to be a sticker so of course I will do it #except it will make me cry all the time #i legit cannot think about them being friends for too long at a time

[stuckinapril]

don’t know if you’ve already shared (or if you wouldn’t like to) but i’d love to hear about your resolutions and goals for this year!

Hi so sorry for how late this is!! I have quite a few!

Ins —

Being more decisive. Trusting myself w calling the shots. Just making a decision and sticking w it.

Financial literacy

More reading. Just more.

Attacking things I’m uncomfortable with instead of shying away from them.

More silence. I don’t need to have my earphones in all the time

More time w family!!! I need to put in as much effort to connect w them as I do w my friends

Green tea every night

More pictures. I have a serious problem of just not being incentivized to take any

More scientific literature for fun!!

Piggybacking off that point—making it instinctive to apply things I study to real life situations. This is a niche one but it just helps me process stuff faster and I just think it’s a super dope learning technique

Pushing myself harder. It’s just not my preference to be mediocre.

Nourishing myself w my own affirmations. Cutting out my need for other people’s validation

Educational documentaries

Making more of an effort to connect w my Arab heritage

Being my natural self. It’s okay if I’m not bubbly all the time. Sometimes I just want to chill

Whole foods

Less phone time (I say this every year but like I want 2024 to be the year I’m truly disconnected/using my phone in a healthy way)

Body oils!

More tennis dates w friends!

10k steps a day

Sticking religiously to my hour by hour schedule

Keeping promises to myself as ardently as I keep promises to others

Being more bold w fashion!!

Hitting the gym 5 days a week

Reading more literature in Arabic and French

Learning how to cook. I cannot live off Siggi’s for the rest of my life lol

Exploring more music genres

Learning the piano!!

No longer feeling guilty for withholding information. Privacy is not a bad thing.

Getting more and more independent!!

Becoming the friend I want to be. Other people need to show up as well, but I can’t hold people up to standards I myself can’t reach.

Outs —

Centralizing luxury brands. Thinking that price equates to quality. The fact of the matter is quality equates to quality. Price is irrelevant.

Relying on snap judgment responses to situations. I need to learn to wait at least 15 minutes. I can be impulsive asf

Jumpiness. Nervous energy. I just want to be more calm and controlled in how I carry myself. I want to exude self-assuredness

Checking my phone first thing in the morning!!

Drinking less than 3 liters of water a day

Being available all the fucking time. If someone has an issue w me for being busy, maybe they’re not someone I want in my life in the first place.

Being too forgiving. Not immediately allowing someone back into my life doesn’t make me a bitch. Immediately running to fix things w someone doesn’t make me selfless. Being the bigger person in situations where I was nowhere near in the wrong doesn’t make me mature. It’s just symptomatic of a lack of boundaries.

Consuming dumb shit in the name of “keeping up w pop culture.” I don’t care about celebrity controversy #7282727. I don’t care about celebrity selfie #827226. It doesn’t elevate my life in any way. I legit just don’t care. And this goes for real life gossip w friends too

Taking too long to text back!! A day is fine, but sometimes I take longer and I think that’s a shitty trait to have. I can absolutely afford to respond to people faster.

Too much chocolate!! I’m a sweet tooth but I must preserve my skin/overall health

Motivation over discipline. I need to be attuned to discipline always.

Control freak antics. I can’t control people. It’s not my responsibility. They’ll act how they act. All I can do is control my reaction to it

Rumination/unhealthy venting. When I’m done w something, I’m done w something.

Overcompensating for other people’s shortcomings. It’s not my responsibility to coddle others. It’s okay if something is too much for me.

Having no boundaries w others. People aren’t entitled to private information. It doesn’t make me deceptive to withhold things—it just makes me selective. People need to earn private details about me.

Curating things I like. I simply like what I like. It’s not that deep.

#ask #2024

[bitimdrake]

pssssst hey quick question on the dl - who is helena bartinelli??

i cannot answer anon questions on the dl, so answer on the up-high, which she deserves:

HUNTRESS

a.k.a. Helena Bertinelli, a.k.a. Gotham's coolest and most notable antihero, crossbow-wielder, and purple bat-associated vigilante.

Helena was born to an Italian mob family, but spent her childhood blissfully unaware of the family business--until her entire family was slaughtered in front of her when she was eight. She stayed with family overseas for the rest of her childhood, learning how to fight and protect herself.

She came back to Gotham for both vengeance and justice, and became one of Gotham's many vigilantes. Though her focus is on the mob, she'll step in to stop any crime.

She's also a schoolteacher! Good for her.

She is discerning in who she chooses to kill, but she does kill. As you can imagine, this put her at odds with Batman for a long time. Helena is pretty much the premiere example of Bruce trying to claim control over every vigilante in Gotham, no matter how little right he has. The argument on killing/ethics is valid, but his default was basically "do exactly what I say and fall in line under my command, or stop completely," which is why he's an asshole control freak and why I'm constantly mad about how she was treated 👍

She was an absolute mainstay of the Batfamily before Flashpoint (2011) and it is personally hurtful to me that people don't know her. (Like, to be frank? She had far more of a presence than Damian or (living) Jason in the post-crisis era.)

You could count on seeing her in any major Batfamily crossover, from Cataclysm to Battle for the Cowl.

She was central to the biggest Batfamily crossover ever, No Man's Land, where Gotham was locked off from the rest of the country and turned into a lawless wasteland. Bruce left to sulk for the first couple of months and in absence of any other vigilantes in the field (only Oracle having remained in the city), Helena donned the mantle of the Bat for herself to protect the city. And when Batman came back, in return for all she'd done, she got...yelled at, assigned impossible tasks and criticized for not achieving them, her costume stolen and given to someone else, lied to, abandoned in the face of impossible odds, and shot multiple times protecting kids. Absolute fucking hero, honestly.

She also was on the Justice League for a while, though admittedly I have barely touched that run. To my understanding, despite nominating her for the position, Bruce was also the one to revoke her membership there.

Fortunately! things improved!!

In the early/mid 2000s, Helena joined the Birds of Prey, Oracle's team, and found legit friendships and support there with teammates like Dinah Lance/Black Canary. She finally got more respect in the community, and had a much better time.

Additional relationships include:

A big sister/annoying little brother type thing with Tim, who may disapprove of her killing but simply likes making friends too much :)

A great relationship with Vic Sage/the Question

One single issue where she met Steph that presented SUCH interesting potential that I desperately wish had been followed up on

On and off romantic/sexual tension with Dick, depending on the writer, which culminated in a single hook up that apparently most people around here would rather pretend didn't happen, though I really don't think it's that bad

A complicated relationship with Barbara, partially due to clashing personalities and conflicting morals (with Babs being nearly as much of a control freak as Bruce), and partially due to a shared history with Dick because DC loves making women be catty

Surely others from her first solo or time on the JLA that I don't know well enough to list!

She's rad and determined and takes no shit but cares a lot, and I love her. We deserve more stories tying her teaching day job into her night work. We also deserve more stories with her in general.

If you would like additional Helena beyond just cruising my tag, I recommend:

Batman/Huntress: Cry for Blood - far more Huntress than Batman, this is a great 6-issue miniseries about Helena reckoning with her past, ft the Question.

Batman: No Man's Land - if you have the time for it, a big storyline but worth it.

Birds of Prey vol 1 (1999) - Helena starts to appear around issue #57 and becomes a central character from there.

#* #ask #anon #*dc #dc #dc ref #helena bertinelli #huntress #batfam #batman #10to2

[strawberry-milkbunny]

I have no one to talk to about Tokyo Rev so here r my random hot takes that I need to say:

- Emma and Hina r boring and used as romance plot devices it’s okay to admit that Wakui can’t write women idk I don’t expect shounen/men to be able to write girls well (still cried when Emma died tho bc she didn’t deserve it!!!)

- lol I LOVE Yuzuha and Senju tho

- I actually do like Emma and Draken together but I also firmly believe Draken is in love w/Mikey and was just projecting onto Emma LMAO

- Yuzuha is a lesbian

- Controversial: I don’t think Shinchiro was THAT great of an older brother. Like he was cool but he still introduced Mikey and Izana into the world of gang life/normalizing violence and yeah OG Black Dragons isn’t like that but….what do u expect when u form a gang??? .obviously there’s a high chance that it’s gonna develop into LEGIT gang activity

- As an adult and someone who was basically raised by an older sibling w/a big age gap (my sis is 7 years older) I kinda don’t blame Takeomi for being a bad older brother??? Realistically he’s a 17 yr old in charge of raising 2 toddlers like NO SHIT he did a bad job. At least Shin had his grandfather to help out but Takeomi actually had no one. Doesn’t explain y he’s a brokey LOL buttttt again I don’t FULLY blame him for being a bad sibling still hurt my boi Sanzu 😤😤

- I HC that Mikey is used to having a caretaker (Draken and later Sanzu) bc when Shin died he was so depressed and genuinely couldn’t get out of bed

- Takemitchy is also lowkey boring/typical shounen protagonist and canonically stinky like Hina could do sm better. This is personal preference so I find myself wanting more chaotic/dumb protagonists who are slightly morally ambiguous like Denji, Gintoki, hell even Naruto at times. Takemitchy didn’t get character development until BD arc and that’s just a bit too long for me….

- Koko and Inui r gay and dating 💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻

- the Haitani brothers r the kardashians of the TR universe they’re so embarrassing Deadass show up and pose/do absolutely nothing I LOVE THEM SHKSKSKSK

- I love how it’s universally agreed that Mitsuya and Chifuyu r the best bois

- I have mixed feelings about Izana. I genuinely do like him and DESPISE how he’s whitewashed by fanart

- I get it u genuinely just wanted to not be alone and found out ur adopted in the worst way possible but…..idk how that justifies killing ur own sister but u do u ig 🤷‍♀️ and u have KAKUCHO AS UR FAMILY WTH

- don’t listen to me tho I’m a Mikey and Sanzu stan LMAOO 🤭🤭🤭

- Izana is the definition of mommy issues and 100% had crunchy hair lik mans was homeless

- if I saw Izana IRL I would RUN 🏃‍♀️idk he looks a lil crazy

- also this man does not know Tagalog he didn’t even know he was Filipino until he was lik 12

- idk the Tenjiku arc is so funny to me bc Izana is deadass: imma kill everyone in Mikey’s life for revenge and Mikey is lik: bruh I didn’t even kno u existed until last week and now ur killing our sister UNPROVOKED ???

- Bonten!Mikey is a virgin/no libido mans is DEPRESSED

- wished the Bonten arc was longer simply for the outfits bc Wakui KNOWS FASHION but that shit was DEPRESSION

- 3 Deities Arc was amazing and also funny/serious at the same time. It literally was an all out brawl in an AMUSEMENT PARK

- fr tho wtf was Benkei, Wakasa and Takeomi doing there??? Like they’re canonically 27 GO GET A JOB STOP FIGHTING 15 YEAR OLDS SHKSKSKS

- U cannot tell me that Sanzu WASNT sad when Baji and Mucho died.

- Baji was straight up his childhood friend and the only one other than Senju who knows about the plane incident/Mikey’s possessive side. And In the OG!timeline I’m pretty sure Baji was the only friend Sanzu DIDNT attack. While with Mucho he was pretty much his older brother, Sanzu just decided Mikey was better

- Tbh if the dark impulses/Shin thing wasn’t real I would’ve firmly believed Mikey had DID or something. Which again made only worse by the fact that violence and death is such a regular thing in his life (GET THIS MAN THERAPY LIK WTF IS SHIN AND GRANDPA SANO DOING???)

- Kazutora going a lil crazy is lowkey expected and I hate how we only find out about his home life in the character books. This kid grew up in a physically and mentally abusive household (gaslight to pick between parents and as s/o who has experienced that shit it’s fucked up) and I rlly don’t think prison helped out his mental stability either no shit he tried to kill Mikey

- I don’t ship Mikey and Takemichy (despite the IMMENSE gay ness btwn them) firmly bc I think everyone can see how much power Takemitchy has over Mikey idk it has a weird power dynamic like if Takemitchy tried he could 100% control Mikey (platonically or romantically)

- Baji, Chifuyu and Kazutora r a throuple

- I HATE how Sanzu is reduced to this crazy drug addict. Sanzu is canonically smart, manipulative, and formally trained fighter. He also REMEMBERS the OG timeline, he had to experience Shin dying twice and everyone else die no shit he’s a little bonkers/needs drugs to take everything away. Plus his relationship to Mikey which tbh is a whole separate post

- controversial !!!: I ship Mikey and Sanzu or Mikey and Draken. Sanzu only bc this man has a big ass crush and deserves some niceness for once

- ppl write Kakucho as this shy, nice guy like ur not wrong but mans is also running UNPROVOKED into Yakuza offices like it’s the gym while dragging Rindou wit him 😭😭😭

- the haitanis r the best sibling duo

- It lowkey makes me mad in fanfics where Ran is depicted as cheating w/Rin’s gf like??? This man raised his younger brother himself u cannot tell me he doesn’t love his brother and would actually do that to him

- Ran would 1000% do anything for Rin and i firmly believe he kinda regrets not saying anything in court to prevent Rindou frm joining him in jail. Like saying he forced Rindou to kill someone w/him, abusing his brother at home, etc especially in the Bonten! tl he def thinks about wtf he dragged his brother into

- I also don’t think they’ve slept w/ the same person before. Idk I feel like they have diff types like Ran goes for more motherly/mature types while Rindou goes for sweeter/shy types

- Draken has road rage

- Yuzuha should’ve been taller like AT LEAST 5’7 bitch is related to Hakkai and Taiju for gods sake

- OG BD 100% thought Wakasa was a girl for at least a month. He’s canonically 5’3 and pretty.

- Characters who r 100% bisexual: WAKASA, Senju,maybe Hina, Draken (def in denial), Rindou, Ran (he’s a whore as long as ur pretty he’s down), Sanzu, Koko, Kazutora, Chifuyu

- Mitsuya had a crush on Draken

#tokyo revengers #i needed to get this out of my system #bonten #black dragons #tokyo revengers toman #toman gang #tenjiku #mikey sano #izana kurokawa #draken #tokyo revengers sanzu #haitani brothers

[beautifulpersonpeach]

Can I ask you some questions

1. What does karmy generally think about I army ? From what we see I army especially I jkkrs always see karmy as this ultimate power which can confirm something related to boy or jkk etc

2. Is there heavy homophobia in SK like I see Jkk bloggers always warning about which will affect safety of Jkk. I'm confused as when I see street interviews many Koreans seems open minded about it.

3. Is it true that Karmy indeed knows 'tea' lol. I always see bloggers here saying they are hiding it for jkk and boys safety and only share it in their cirlces. But I'm confused, there are antis in SK too and even ex fans can turn antis. Even recently we saw some I- jkkrs turning against JK because he was pushed by company. If one of them really has tea won't it be shared online and harm them which makes me think Karny also knows infos like I army except maybe they'll be seeing boys often.

***

Speaking for myself here.

1 - Every type of fan you have in i-ARMY, you have in k-ARMY, it's just that in k-ARMY it's the more intense version. The antis are more persistent, hateful and vicious, the cosplayers are more devious, the shippers more certain, the chartmys more obsessed and calculating, the solo stans more unhinged and vile, the mantis more extreme, even the OT7s are more intense in how hard they go for every member, more than anything I've seen on the i-ARMY side. But I do think the general perception Korean fans have of international fans (in general not just k-ARMY), is that many international k-pop stans are very easy to manipulate and rile up. Manipulation happens on the Korean side too but with foreigners it's way easier. And I don't think this disadvantage to international fans is just down to language barriers. Cultural nuances between Korea and most Western countries is what drives the bigger role, in my opinion. You simply cannot afford to be thin-skinned and simple-minded as a Korean person in regular society, and in the k-pop industry this is the bare minimum requirement to succeed as an idol for a reason. I mean, have you sat down to think about the sort of brutal honesty, cynicism, and vanity that's rampant in a culture, for plastic surgery to be so common it becomes banal?

Anyway, to answer your first question, k-ARMYs see international ARMYs as somewhat easy to manipulate, but at the same time very volatile and entitled. Sometimes. That first point though means you and I are not the only people who've noticed some people gobble up anything so long as it's in Korean, and that bias can be abused.

That said though, in the jikook community at least far as I know, many k-jokers are legit ARMYs who don't want to endanger the boys by spreading reckless information. Sometimes there are cosplayers and sasaengs mixed in, who do have ulterior motives / misleading information, but the community so far has been able to keep bad actors to the minimum. Overall though, what I really think is that if you actually respect the guys, the ultimate authority/power to confirm something related to them is the boys themselves. Their own actions and words should be clear enough, and your mind capable enough of arriving at a reasoned opinion all on your own. You can test that opinion against new information such as, a Korean person who claims they are more knowledgeable on the topic - because as I've said, Korean is very nuance-dependent and cultural insight is integral to always getting the full picture. Think about what the new information means for your opinion, and move forward with the opinion that makes the most sense to you at the end. Brownie points if you can engage in fandom with people with differing viewpoints, somewhat respectfully.

**

2 - Yes, there's heavy homophobia. And yes the younger generation is more accepting of it but that doesn't ultimately matter because of how Korea works. In my perception of it at least. The hate you get being queer in Korea, never starts directly. They target your friends first. Then your family. Your dad getting a snide comment at work here, your mom getting disinvited from the women's neighborhood meet-up there, your brother getting weird looks... And then there's the state restrictions: gay/queer couples cannot adopt and there are no protections under the constitution. So yes, technically people are out and people can come out and live relatively normal lives, but the path is extremely complicated. For someone like an idol, I'd imagine even more so.

**

3 - I won't waste a lot of time on this since I already said quite a bit in point 1. The one thing I'll say is if there's one thing you need to note about this industry, it's this: k-pop is so insanely competitive, people are so ridiculously wicked and psychotic that anybody who has dirt on you won't hesitate to use it at the first opportune moment. (You in this case being an idol/group.) Like, any 'tea' that's worthwhile gets spilled before long given the churn rate in the industry. And this is true to a large extent for companies too. For example, I don't think BigHit/HYBE is all that different from other k-pop agencies in this industry, but I do think they are in many ways better because if they were just as bad or worse than other agencies, we would've seen the paperwork by now. We would've seen the lawsuits, the weeping idols, the 'disgruntled staff' blinds (SM is notorious for being so good at this one), we would've seen that mess by now. Because many people don't hesitate to walk, especially in the case of abuse. Also, there is a very real limit to what even Korean people can know if they're outside the team's inner circle. Usually what counts as 'tea' is sightings and schedules, which if not illegal isn't damning in the least. But there are other kinds of 'tea' that's clearly malicious, but oftentimes that sort of hit is contracted. For example, things like the targeted attack Jimin faced regarding his missed insurance payments, myself and a few friends believe that was 'contracted hate'. Something that's unfortunately not uncommon in the industry.

**

K-ARMYs / k-jikookers are very similar in behaviour to i-jikookers, just more intense, usually / in my experience (including myself). So weigh their words/actions accordingly.

#sorry for the double negatives :) #jimin #park jimin #bts #bts fandom #fandom behaviour #fandom discourse #bts army #jikook

[strugglingatart]

Jr Year ep 3

This is me live blogging bc I need to get thoughts out also would love fandom friends full spoilers bellow the cut just so no one accidentally reads anything they don’t want to this will be long

EX GIRLFRIEND I will legit fight Brennan why did we at least not see it....

btw me saying I will fight brennan is mostly a joke like I get why we made all these changes, I don't actually love everything but I do trust all these people enough that it will serve the story and play out great

Immediately clocking the fairy festival (Frosty whatever it is I'm so sorry Brenan says it and then it's immediately out of my head) connection we love

love love looove the aguefort projections, so many Arthur statues!

Riz's manic energy is such a vibe, not exactly healthy but a vibe I get

the astral realm where all the dead gods go

lowkey love that Gorgug and Fabian are solid like the boys lowkey play them so dumb but that's just teenage boys for ya (also thought maybe Fabian would be in less trouble but still some so this makes my anxiety relax a bit, only issues we already knew off)

Actually for the wizards I'm really chill is an A+ and also probably true sentence

ah the answer I needed about Fig's multiclass

Ah the society of shadows again, and a college for sad alone adventureres lol

their record is bad but it should be worse when talking about the one person sports team is SO FUNNY to me

the friends bit is so good, everythig about it, all the laughing, Emily failing intentionally, Ally letting it work even tho it shouldn't, perfection

Lydia still making half orc meals we love and stan

Adaine-Riz friendship is SO IMPORTANT to me

the sibbling energy our girls have are amazing

the Thisstlesprings will literally just go into sex ed and Gorgug's reaction is gold everytime

"Can I run from you?" LMAO

ok I'm getting the silly energy they were talking about now

listennnn we are gonna get into Gorgug isn't a good barbarian according to his teacher again aren't we? it's why it wasn't pre approved? I will fight this teacher he literally saved the world twice as mostly a barbarian let him be a chill barbarian

WHY DID GILLEAR NOT TALK TO FIG

yes Fabian make Fig go to class

yay new lunch lad

also I legit thought the time quangle was just an explain continuity errors away and also get rid of the agueforts who break encounters thing but it might be related to the plot now that it's come back up in the recap and in the intercom in story

Fig has Gillear's luck confirmed ok

Zac's physical comedy continues to be SO GOOD

the sillies really are here I'm laughing so much

straight away this lady is insane

four different dogs is such a good burn, love agro Kristen

do not trust this people at all

ohhh skullcleaver, Katya's aunt? cousin? I don't recall the seven mentioning that

listen Fabian's house being party house is lowkey dangerous

Kristen being a disaster gay even when trying to help friends flirt is a mood and a half

ooohh I like mazey

don't trust the attomaton tbh

also yes I just thought of this now so it's late but going back to Kipperlilly whatever her name is, like homegirl can't make big institutional changes youre class president not on staff

rules always being followed to the letter is tbh scary there has to be room for interpretation, perfect order doesn't exist

YES PLOT love how it's already too much bc mood and "yeah I cannot think about that right now" and "embodyment of writers block" oh this season is gonna continue to hit me in the face

Wanda Childa is wild

she was a turncoat, more importantly she was a mirror

why is Ally's hey girlie voice so terrifying

fully forgot porter was the barbarian teacher and I will fight porter LET GORGUG MULTICLASS...

aaaa I'm going into a worry is here, legit thought it was gonna be in battle but I love Gorgug's energy here bc I've been there where you do things kinda nontraditional way and have teachers make the achivements sound so much worse just bc i didn't get there through the path they wanted me to take

love terpsichore immediately

they get 30's fairly often now we love level 10

fabian is such an arsty kid at heart and always was like Lou wanted to make a jock maybe but never did

listen trashbag sandwich is worrying but it was indeed fine

I get that Riz is type A but he is the non annoying kind

homegirl who desn't like technicalities and ppl gettign away with stuff got out in one huh? also I have no idea what that means the teacher found her? what?

Jawbone I love you and also I worry about how much I relate to Riz

I so hate this girl I'm with Adaine, she's the worst we've had

oh no the Applebee's

ok so I have a huge like essay somewhere about both why I don't like how Kristen is dealing with Cassandra but also how I 10000% understand her as someone who abandoned religion but was then forced to still be in similar roles and religious enviornments after that somewher in my head buut also who cares but just know it exists

omg Bucky giving her a hug I cry

Kristen is not doing well but that was actually a pretty good parental confrontation tbh I'm proud

oh damn poor Adaine I'm sosorry my dear you don't deserve this

Brennan really went you know what? we are not having your wildness work for you this time Emily, your shit is catching up to you

yay fig went to class finally

we got SO many designs with all the teachers and such and they are all so great

oh nooo Kristeeen, each step I take the step behind me vanishes is such a raw ass line like this poor teenager is legit so lost like someone help her please (also that was a relatable little monologue.. am I ok?)

love the cleric teacher a lot

ok but i love cassandra alright twilight, mystery and doubt are such a cool ass domain you can sell it and embrace it Kristen I belive in youuuu

but also again: a good ass teacher

awn I love that they're back in the forest

again Siobhan promised no taers and I have cried twice now maybe three times in three eps??? rude af

the bad kids should've helped with the whole Cassandra stuff I just realised I'm so sorry

oh shit not Kalina again.... I feel like i got stabbed in the heart

oh I am sooo pumped for next ep!!!!!

#fantasy high #dimension 20 #fhjy #riz gukgak #kristen applebees #fabian aramais seacaster #adaine o'shaughnessey #gorgug thistlespring #fig faeth

[pruning-the-minds-garden]

On Trust

Lets talk about trust in kink generally, and in hypnokink specifically. First, about Proximal Trust, then about Trusting me, and last about Accountability.

Something I want, I need people in the hypnokink space - and in general, really - to watch out for is Proximal Trust. This is when [Person A] gains a level of perceived trust or integrity in the eyes of other people, by being associated with (in proximity to) [Person B]. A concrete example: "I've seen HypnoDude being friendly with and sharing the content of SpiralChain for ages, and I trust SpiralChain, so HypnoDude has to be legit..."

Let me let Gen. Ackbar tell you what that is -

There are a lot of people I talk to in the hypnokink community, who exist in a space where... well... it's not that I think they're untrustworthy, but at the same time I cannot attest directly to whether they are trustworthy and respectful partners. That's not because I have doubts about them as people, but because I have never interacted with them in that specific way. They've never been sexually, kinkstually or whatever interested in me, nor I them, and that is a very different level of interaction to, "hey how's the weather? You like D&D 5E? Oh cool, so what's your favorite kind of induction?"

I cannot, and you should not, assume that just because someone is able to maintain a friendship with me without setting off alarm bells in my head, that they are a considerate, ethical, and compatible partner. It is just not a good or safe assumption to make. Yes, a lot of really skeevy people will squick me out and I will avoid them right off the jump... but a lot of others won't.

Cloaking one's predatory nature or broken stair-ness in order to get in the proximity of trusted folks is a great strategy to get access to a more steady stream of potential partners, and so it is one oft employed. And, it often works. I cannot possibly vouch for everyone I interact positively with, nor everyone who shares my content, nor everyone who upvotes or likes my ideas. I can only vouch for the small circle of people I've actually had intimate interactions with or whom I've directly seen interacting in that way for a long enough time to feel comfortable drawing conclusions from said observations. I wish predators and unethical actors and broken stairs came with badges, but sadly they do not.

If you have questions about individuals, ask me about them in DM. I will tell you what I know, and admit what I do not (which is often a lot). I will be as honest and forthright as possible, to give you the ability to make an honest risk assessment for yourself. I'm always here to help, too, should things should go awry, in whatever way you deem necessary. I limit the extent to which I publicly call people out to those people who have, in my eyes, repeatedly and unapologetically done things that cross serious ethical lines, and for whom there is sufficient and publicly-available evidence.

On a related note, everything I said above about other people applies to me, too. I know I make a lot of content on ethics and safety and consent and that might recommend to suspicion that I'm "automatically" a trustworthy person. I'ma let Gen. Ackbar take that one again -

Don't assume you can trust me. I really do appreciate that I've helped people, it means a ton to me. It matters. I am really, really, really super glad to have made the amount of difference - however big or small it is - that I have. I'm grateful for all of your support and accolades and all of that.

However.

No amount of difference, no amount of kudos, no amount of good a person could do, ever, makes them automatically worthy of your trust. That goes double in an intimate, kink context. Always, always, always vett your potential intimate and kink partners as best you can. Just because someone has a bunch of good friends, that does not mean that can't then turn around and be a consent violating asshole in the proverbial (or literal) bedroom. Just because someone talks a good - or great - game, that doesn't mean that when push comes to shove they aren't sus as hell. Vett. Your. Partners. Please. Not doing so does not excuse unethical or injurious behavior on their part - that's their doing and their failing, not yours - but it will help greatly to keep you safe. In an ideal world it would not be required, but we don't live in that ideal world, and until we do we have to live in the one we do.

That brings us to Accountability. I've said a lot here about not trusting the wrong people, so I want to make something absolutely, crystal clear: if someone does something hurtful to you, that is THEIR fault, not yours. Where you put your trust and how you vett people does matter but it does not, in any way, to any extent, make the things that happen to you "your fault." Accountability for those hurtful, abusive actions is 100% on the shoulders of the people who do them. It will never be anywhere else. All of the above - vetting, proximal trust, etc - is said with a mind to practicality and self-protection, to keeping you safe in the future, and not with even a hint of suggestion of blame or responsibility for anything. I know that when you are in the grips of something like that it can be easy to get into a blame, shame or self-hate spiral, wondering how you could let something like that happen and... you didn't. Things like that don't passively occur, they are actively pursued, and done so in ways that specifically overcome or bypass or evade the protective mechanisms that we all use to keep that from being done to us. It's. Not. Your. Fault.

Is this in response to a specific situation? Yes. More than one, honestly. Am I going to spill the proverbial tea? If I was going to, I would have already. I value given promises of privacy and even implicit ones far more than the social currency of naming-and-shaming and "✨#drama✨". If the time comes for that, though, rest assured it will happen. In the mean time, I'll do what I can to see that people are safe, healthy, and steps are taken to prevent future harm, as appropriate. I care about this community and I want to do right by it, and by all of you, as best I can.

#hypnokink #hypnokink community #safety #consent #trusting people

[themurderofcrowscollective]

" Shall I have this dance? "

Ghost has danced with Death countless times and only watched Death take his friends and loved ones with no ability of doing anything to stop it even more. He likes to imagine he's Death itself, until the day Death arrived atop a black horse in his dream... or should I say vision?

- - -

You are Death, not in a 'I'm-so-war-torn-and-edgy' way but in a more legit way. You were once a man named Garret, you had been slaughtered in captivity of the enemy and then woke up to find yourself being interviewed by the former Grim Reaper who instantly hired you on the spot as the new Grim Reaper.

Your horse is apparently your old cat named Midnight reincarnated so when you found him, you two were happy to see each other and an old bond between you both came back from the dead.

Some perks of being the Grim Reaper is wielding the scythe, yes you'll admit you're still a dork, and getting to travel the world freely. Since you're as dead as a doorknob, you also get to see the spirit world so you're a frequent visitor to Japan for the festivals held by the Mononokes and Yokais.

- - -

Every Day of The Dead, you visit old friends who've long died and still use your skills of speaking Spanish so they don't get rusty. It's great partying with them, and speaking of languages, you've mastered every language before you were signed up for field duty.

One night after being a sweetheart to a lonely dying man, letting him cross over to the afterlife, you hear your phone go ding so you take it out and see you've been given a new assignment. What strikes you as odd is that this isn't your usual task of finding a certain person across the world to help them move on but... to find a group of people who need to stay alive.

You accept it anyway, whistling for Midnight who comes galloping with a whinny. " New task Midnight, I gotta keep a group of individuals alive this time. A little strange but I'm always one for something new. " The pair of you start heading off with a portal opening up quickly in front, which you both enter through.

Upon entering through, you're back in your personal room with a letter on your bed. Midnight morphs into a black cat and sits on your bed, meowing while softly papping the letter. " Oh, thanks Midnight. " You pick it up and start reading it.

" 'Dear Mr. Reaper, upon accepting this task you hereby are required to wear a human disguise and it is important you do so as to not startle anyone. You are still free to go about your other tasks but you cannot forget that your group of particular individuals are of great importance.' Wow they still always seem so posh in these letters. Anyways... 'Upon further notice, your records from your previous life will not be used but you will go under a new alias with a secret life. It is up to you to remain anonymous, and once your task is fulfilled, you will be free from this task and go onto other tasks.' " You notice there's another slip of paper so you swap it with the other letter. " 'Your task will last until the designated timestamps of each individual.' " Below is a list of names and the ages they die. John Price - Current age: 48 - Death age: 90 " Goddamn. " Kyle 'Gaz' Garrick - Current age: 28 - Death age: 86 John 'Soap' MacTavish - Current age: 28 - Death age: 84 Simon 'Ghost' Riley - Current age: 29 - Death age: 85 For a moment you think the last two names are going to die together until you find a little sidenote. 'Simon Riley and John MacTavish are to die at the same time. They are bound by the chains of Fate and their love is written in the stars.' Huh. You've heard of those kinds of deaths, where love continues to live on even in death. You know a few guys like that too, but you've never experienced it in person. There are other names too. 'Konig' - Current age: 32 - Death age: 80 Kim 'Horangi' Hong-jin - Current age: 31 - Death age: 79 Another pair bound by chains. Gary 'Roach' Sanderson - Current age: 27 - Death age: 75 Nikolai 'Nik' Belinski - Current age: 49 - Death age: 90 Alejandro Vargas - Current age: 42 - Death age: 83 Rodolfo Parra - Current age: 41 - Death age: 82 And that makes a fourth pair. You catalogue the four pairs bounded by fate and take a deep breath, folding away the letter and putting it in your pocket. Midnight meows at you softly. " I know, this'll be one of the longest tasks I've done. But at least it's not eternity. " - - - (Pairs bounded by fate are John x Nikolai, Ghost x Soap, Konig x Horangi and Alejandro x Rodolfo. Yeh.)

[st0rmyskies]

have you ever felt so anxious over writing something you just cannot bring yourself to start writing it? if so, how did you get over it? do you ever manage to write even when irl stuff is stressing you out? how?

ig what i mean is that writing is hard. how do you do it? have you ever felt like giving up on it? you just seem to write so much. ig i just want some advice, if you're willing to give it. i love your stories

-👁

Hey anon, thank you for the kind words and thank you even more for reaching out! This one is a little long so it's under the cut.

Writing is fucking hard, isn't it. It takes a lot of time, a lot of creative work, a lot of energy that sometimes we don't have in us. Sometimes life gets in the way, or we're too tired from work or school, or we have other obligations to tend to.

First and foremost, it's important to remember:

You need to do what makes you happy.

This is your hobby, it's your free time. If that means you feel like writing 2000 words on Monday, awesome. By Wednesday, if you'd rather sit and play video games, that's cool; you don't need to write every single day. If you can only get 100 words down on a weeknight because you're tired or busy, hey, that's 100 more words than you had yesterday. It all adds up.

I was anxious about writing and sharing the ovi fic. I avoided putting those words down for months and months, just letting the scenario play out in my head instead. Eventually, I really just wanted to see it on paper, and I shared some of it with friends to get excited with people, and that encouraged me to keep going. For me, sometimes sharing and having others to get hyped with helps keep me going. Other times, I may write something completely for myself.

When irl stuff is stressing me out, I use writing as escapism. There are a lot of themes in my writing -- acceptance of people despite their flaws, working hard to be a good person despite setbacks, always getting up and trying again, fuck even just Hyrule being a med student -- that are directly related to my irl stressors. Sometimes I just put down fluff to make me happy. It doesn't have to all relate to a given plot. Hell, it doesn't even need to be the same AU. Just going with the flow at any given time helps me keep going.

There are other times when irl stressors are too great and I have to take a little break from writing, and that's okay too. I'm currently coming off of a weeks-long writing hiatus because health and work things were getting out of hand. And that's okay! You and I don't owe anyone anything. Don't let imagined deadlines or the audience of the internet make you crazy. We're legit just doing this for fun.

Do I ever think about giving up on writing? Yes and no. I have abandoned WIPs because I didn't like where they were going, or because I wasn't finding them fun anymore. Some days, words are hard and they just won't come. But in general, I always like writing and I don't consider giving up on it.

One thing I've learned is that you're not going to wake up every single day and want to be a ___, be that a writer, a doctor, a pilot, a car salesman. Some days you just aren't going to vibe with it, and that's fine. Sit with those feelings, let them come and go. Don't stress about them when they come up, because if it's something you really love, you'll always come back to it eventually.

Finally, don't measure your progress compared to anyone else - especially not to me!! I've written so much over the past few years because writing is my stress response. Truthfully, for a long time I was using it as an unhealthy coping mechanism. Everything in moderation.

I hope that helps, anon, and you can always reach out via the inbox with questions.

#stormy asks #eyeball anon #stormys writing advice ig

[ohanny]

another friday, another cutie pie episode! so here are my thoughts while watching the second episode:

kuea is absolutely not me because i would never check my email first thing in the morning, notifs be damned

also even if i did get good news, i would not have the energy to throw a full "blackpink in your area" on top of my bed

kuea: oh yes, i am a bit... sore lian: ¬‿¬

ugh, why can't you just talk to this man who just happens to be a supportive, relatively mentally stable, functioning adult who dresses nice, cooks you food, pulls out your chair and YOU ACT LIKE THE RETURNING HIDE AND SEEK CHAMPION OF 2022

lian: if you need help, you can always tell me me: IF ONLY

nonetheless, i've had a boyfriend for a decade and i feel as single as the last crushed pringle at the bottom of the tube of doom when zee looks at nunew

kuea, a lying liar who lies: kon diao texted me lian: i love you me: KUEA DO YOU FEEL EVEN A LIL BAD???

i love the mission impossible theme tune

nong diao squared ready to cover up crimes

yi can smell bullshit a mile away but unfortunately for him, he's also a weak victorian bitch who gets flustered by a cheek touch from a twink he (alledgedly) fucked in his car just last week

JUST SHOW ME PERTH YOU COWARDS chapter 2

diao is a good friend with a good brain cell. we all need a diao.

kuea: i have a lot to think about. me: you also have a lo to TALK about goddammit

meanwhile poor lian is just trying to plan his barbie dream wedding, oh dear

yi is here to be the best man but also to watch the world burn.

kon diao loves lists. kon diao is me.

the world does not deserve diao. this show certainly doesnt. if he was running it, again, it would be 5 minutes long. well, maybe 15. he would keep all the spicy bits.

this beauty clinic is totally not the sponsor of this series.

the totally not sponsoring intensifies

"how do i look?" EXACTLY THE SAME AS YOU DID 30 SECONDS AGO YOU BABY SKINNED MOCHI OF PERFECTION

i will never not mishear this as "cosmic-exo entertainment" and i am not sorry

uh-oh, their barbie dream weddings are NOT the same

lsakjfkasljfafj a nuer x syn intermission! and nuer has a less questionable shirt on!

you two (ಥ﹏ಥ)

but props to syn never hiding his intentions and props to nuer respecting his choices even if they make him a sad boy. SOME PEOPLE could never

hia yi is eternal suffering personified even at a cake tasting and quickly becoming my favourite.

foei: oh is it too crowded? do we need more room? the gays: *offended*

salaldkjf i am catching vibes. pls tell me they will grey's anatomy this and diao and yi will end up getting married in the barbie dream wedding horror show while kuea and lian elope in korea

"you can make the final decision" says lian, not having any idea they like the polar opposite things.

he is a smooth bastard though. "ah yes, my favourite wedding singer will be too busy being my husband"

"oh no, how will our suits match if we cannot see them?" you dumbo, you have kon diao, the wedding planner extraordinaire. he has a list for that.

diao has been calling out bullshit since birth at this point.

yi: ah yes, they are so compatible. diao: dude, they can't agree on anything. yi: which is not my problem.

yi really be like "pfffft, let them talk it out between them" as if we have time to be here for the next ten years. he really couldn't give less fucks, lol

DIAO LEGIT IS LIKE IZZIE PLANNING MERDER'S WEDDING

how can he answer cosmic-exo in that suit. go change.

oh, the straights are at it again

lian: thank you yi: oh, you already picked a suit? lian: yes yi: wow, i am so helpful. you are blessed to have me tolerate you.

i love how nunew's voice gets so much deeper when he switches to english

IF ONLY YOU WERE THAT EXCITED ABOUT YOUR OWN WEDDING

kuea: what should i do? me screaming at my tv: TALK TO YOUR MAN

diao is seriously like baby yoda and syn doesn't need to become a monk. he just needs to hang out with diao more for some deep wisdom and then keep living in sin.

nuer is a sweet understanding angel and syn is a pouty baby and i could watch these two forever

"it's our wedding, not just mine." except you have NO IDEA you're not getting your wedding but an industrial scale keerati legacy production

yi: see? they're totally on the same page diao: ...

who is this random laxatives lady and why does she look like she's about to place a curse on kuea?

lian: you pick kuea: i am fine with everything narrator: he was not, in fact, fine with anything

diao turn of the tap for fucks sake, it is very obvious you are not paying your own bills in this economy

diao: my dog is so smart yi: your dog is literally an idiot

oh god here we have hia yi talk about marriage and kasdjflkafj they might kiss and i can't believe i am about to say this but at this point diao needs to worry about me cooking that cockblocking dog :D

WE HAVE A STAIRCASE WITH A HAND RAIL? IN A BL?!?!?!

lian: *trying* kuea: cosmic-exo is calling, byeee

look at his sad eyes, he KNOWS

"why am i talking to a doll?" BECAUSE IT IS MORE LIKELY TO HAVE AN ACTUAL CONVERSATION WITH YOU. you deserve better, boo.

lian: aren't you kirin already kuea: but i could be cosmic-exo kirin in korea. lian: okay. kuea: ... wait what?

OH FUCK SCREW THE WEDDING WAS THAT PERTH I JUST SAW?!?!?!?

#cutie pie the series #cutie pie 2 you #episode recap reaction whatever #lian x kuea #yi x diao #the gays are at it again: wedding edition

[cathalbravecog]

Man... I can't stop thinking about the things that were talked about on the stream, especially the answer on my question - so... get ready for a ramble! its a long one. oops. i dont even know where im going with this, im just dumping my thoughts somewhere. half is about ttcc lore in general and the streams, the other half is about cathal and me projecting onto him deeper.

before i even hop deeper into this, it wasn't until early today that i learned that there was a whole drama about cranky's answers (regarding the graham and flint question and the whole "keep it sane" thing. i thought it was...off, but i understood it as 'do what you want people, just don't start any harassment because of ships and your favorite pairs'.

definitely could have been phrased better, though. at least we got a good response and an apology later from maven on twitter. but i legit did not know this was a drama until those twitter posts were made LOL. i dont interact with the fandom so i do not know how that answer was percieved by most. or if anyone except for me and my friends have had any thoughts about the question i asked that got answered.)

and what im tryna get to is that i get cranky isnt the one to be answering lore things, and probably didnt know what to answer... but it's still something to think about

because being told "cogs and toons just dont become how they are out of the blue" (paraphrasing here) as an answer to what cathal initially thought of seeing his dad be bet up and thrown off a tower is... confusing? he did say first and foremost that it has to be built upon before saying that. i understand that this is... a lot of characters! and cathal did have some focus on him thanks to the comic and they wanted to focus on other managers... but some have deeper, more intricate lore that's easy to grasp (especially the more, well, angstier managers like chip and misty.)

and we have gotten some extra lore for other managers like belle, mary, tawny.... thanks to thomas' rambles.

and it's definitely difficult for a team of volounteers working hard on a fan game together to make lore for all the characters, that are still very young in their *life span*, having been around for less than a year. despite ttcc being more character driven and focused on the cogs, it's still a game they have to run so they cannot focus on lore only and some game management has to be done first. there's a bunch of things they have to consider, like consistency and how fans may react, or possible themes or what they want the story to be...

and. yeah. its hard since. come on lets admit it. clash has an issue with how these are all given to us. hell, there's lore bits i still dont know about and im still learning because it's..so all over the place. a new player will not know about it. maven acknowledged this in the tweet and i really appreciate that, as it's honestly been my number one issue with clash, especially as someone who is there for the lore. (i mean, and the gameplay, i know some people who don't play the game itself much. well i sure do a little TOO MUCH because i have PROBLEMS. but im interested in the lore, too, yknow?)

some lore you cant learn from the wiki, and unless you interact with the community, you may never learn *where* all of this even is. if you werent live for certain lore there, it's hardly accessible to you. lore locked behind one time events, an arg website, wikis, discord chats... all that. it's hard to keep track of! i'm sure it's like that for both the fans and the writers. these characters are great, fun, and i love them, but the way we are given this information is... not the best. it's very easy to miss certain details.

it's especially bad if you're like me - only ever interacting with a close group of people you trust, (because people are scary especially a lot of... lore driven fans. yeahnoimeanshippers.sorry.and just big crowds of people in general) having only gotten back into the game recently AFTER most of the major lore events (first played once in 2019, then never again until january 2023) and also you dislike youtube and video content, so you dont watch it. something in your brain would rather if you step on a nail than watch a playthrough video (especially with commentary).

like in general it shouldnt be necessary to go through all these hoops just to know the lore! especially for things that may have little lore...

anyways, uh, back to cathal. i cannot stop thinking about this.

it definitely wasnt an answer to what i specifically asked - but possibly more so about... why cathal is the way he is? and despite what my brain and low self esteem during hard times may tell me - i do not believe that anybody is truly "lazy". i just dont think that exists. there's always some reason behind a person being unmotivated or lazy. even the little things!

but like... that's just kinda obvious. all toons and cogs have motivations. thats like... one of the basics of writing characters. have motivations for characters and reasons for why they are how they are. doesnt have to be anything tragic, just.... how they are as people.

it's totally unrelated to the question of what cathal thought about seeing his dad like that... but oh well! i asked that because i made up my own story around that already, and i just wanted to see what someone working on the game thinks about the same idea.

not to be Tumblr User CathalBravecog, but, of course I have projected heavily onto cathal. i have already stated how important cathal is to me as a character, especially with appreciating myself when im.. not exactly the most motivated. when im not doing much. taught me to appreciate breaks. hell! i keep preaching this myself. its okay to take breaks! and yet i often end up not doing it and i overwork myself on games and art and other things.

there's... a lot of things "wrong" with me that i don't have names for yet, especially due to not having a diagnosis for them, but they're very real feelings and they cause me to be unable to do things a lot of the time. various mental blocks and a new member of the gang... physical pai! hooray.

this... endless productivity we are forced and expected to do. it can take a toll on you. breaks are just as necessary and to say it's a thing that has to be re-learned is... sickening. hooray for living in a Corporate (clash) society, fellas.

one thing i can say is that i absolutely headcanon that cathal has adhd - though, maybe not the same type i do. i do not think he gets randomly hyper and wants to (and does) jump around everywhere and blurt things out randomly and impulsively. cathal here has the low energy, yknow.

i like that a lot of the content around him doesnt even describe him with the words "lazy" and "sleepy" instead.

every day is the same... even if his job is relatively simple, just watching over the camera feed - it's definitely boring... and having to do it every day is not rewarding. and being mostly alone and without consequence, he gives into wanting to do something else. he's got these huge screens and a room to himself, and he loves watching shows and cartoons... so he's gonna do that. it's more fun. it's stimulating. and especially with his dad being the one to give him his position, he knows that he's got nothing to really worry about there.

i also think it's a bit hard to be motivated knowing that... this war between the cogs and toons is just. endless. hell, again, he has to see his dad *everyday* be attacked by them. his body damaged after the fall - only to be fixed again. rinse and repeat. i would too, find it pointless. especially if you're like cathal, since i pointed out before that he is very kind and caring towards the other cogs. he's also thoughtful, noting that yknow... a lot of stairs to get to his room.

why do all that when you can chill... and feel good. do something that feels nice...

i don't have any names for this, but with how sleepy he usually is, that's definitely a thing to consider too. and just, from experience... being tired and/or sleepy it... dismotivates you even more. its so hard to start tasks even if you *want* to do them. and considering cathal mooost likely doesn't want to do his work on his own - then these tasks can be just. impossible to start.

like, i have struggled with this my entire life myself, just because of my adhd screwing with everything, but after getting covid and most definitely getting a form of chronic exhaustion from it.. things have been even harder. i pull myself through day and i barely have the energy to even start anything. sometimes i dont even do anything all day and... woops! still no mood or energy to do anything. i just work on random bursts of motivation and things that captivate me...

not sure how it relates to cathal, but, hey, if im personal here ill ramble about it too because WOW it has been biting me in the ass and i need to speak to Professionals About It

like... i dont think hes being "lazy" willingly, yknow? theres a reason behind it. it definitely is just... being sleepy, the comfort... the fun and stimulation doing something fun he's interested in (his shows) are just... stronger desires and way easier for him to get to. why struggle through something when it takes up all your energy, and then you feel no reward for it? yeah. exactly. even just "not feeling like it" is a reson. "not having energy" is a reason. hey, are these things to get better about if needed? certainly. i wish i could get help with this, it would help me in my life so so much. but should it be seen as ENTIRELY negative and as being a "hinder to society". hell nah. and i think thats swag. cathal is swag he can do this, good for him lmaooo. my brain is deteriorating i apologize.

there was... another thing i wanted to say, but i forgot. so i'll move on.

but just... yeah. i dont think cathal is just lazy. i dont believe in "laziness". he's got reasons for why he prefers naps and just... watching tv instead of doing his work. perhaps he does want to do these things, but gave up on trying. its not worth the effort, it does not feel good. its not stimulating enough to keep him going.

#long #ramble #cathalposting #i...may delete this later i dont know. i both wanna talk to ppl i know about this #but also Do Not Percieve me. I am Afraid Of What People Think #Stay Back Foul Beasts ! #alsoy eah i had other stuff to talk about...more on the negative side i guess but??? its. a bit difficult to #give and .. angstier things? negative thoughts? to a character who you see a lot of comfort in. they make you happy #they help you feel better about yourself. you want to see them happy. if theyre happy #youre happy. if theyre sad...well. you are sad. sadness is natural. its a real thing. it happens sometimes. its a part of life #and i have attached some of these things to cathal already. but a few things are hard for me to consider because of The Brain Worms. #i dont want to see him hurt either yknow. #anyways i hope you enjoyer my mental illness ramble. im not normal and you shouldve known that when you followed me #thank you for existing cathal ray toby braveswag #hey fun fact remember how i said i get tired of stuff myself easily well this whole thing made me tired. i was gonna #answer an ask but now im like. man. (melts into a puddle) #(doesnt take a break bc i need instant stimulation and makes things worse for myself) #do yall see why i like cathal so much now gamers? #ya. sorry this got personal. if any of you can handle reading this u deserve a reward. #and maybe i need to start talking about personal things this much. but whatever #this is my blog i can talk about anything and thats the COOL THING! #MWAHAHAHHAHAHA! #dies #ivegot a lot going on in my brain rn cant u tell

[yuujispinkhair]

GUURRRRLLLLL

i just finished reading the last chapter of "to the end" and FUUCCCKKK...winter? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MEEEE?? you are HANDS DOWN one of my favorite writers EVER. the way you describe everything...you always use the most eloquent wording. you're like a visual artist, painting your vivid images in my mind so perfectly!

but listen. chapter 6? I SOBBED!! it wasn't just the story though...it's like when you hear a sad song with the most beautiful music and poignant lyrics. that's what reading chapter 6 was like for me...you moved me to tears with the way you conjured so much out of thin air. i felt EVERYTHING both sukuna and reader felt: the grief, the anger, the love, the fear, the uncertainty, the hatred, the despair, the anguish, the fury...you brought every single one of these emotions to life in 7k words. i felt that shit IN MY BONES.

how do you DO it, winter?? every time i think i've read your best fic, you go and outdo yourself. you are so incredibly gifted at this craft. i legit look up to you as a writer and an artist. and i also happen to think you're one of the sweetest, sunniest humans i've met in my life, both on and off tumblr. 💗 you're the bo to my akaashi. 🦉

i'm kinda sad "to the end" has reached its own end, but it's okay bc i know you're going to continue churning out even better work (which seems impossible, but again, you always somehow manage to top even your best work. and i admire tf out of you as a writer for the way you obviously push yourself to get better and better!)

sorry this ended up being so long 😅 i could go on and on about you and your godlike talent! i'm such a fangirl PLEASE 😭😭😭

(p.s. - i'd like to think that if the virus is ever cured, sukuna and reader will go on to have a little boy together and name him yuuji...and he'd have pink hair just like his dad and uncle 🥹💗)

KEL I READ THIS AND THEN I BAWLED MY EYES OUT BECAUSE I GOT SO EMOTIONAL AAAHHH THANK YOU SO SO MUCH!!! <3<3<3 This is so sweet of you!! And it means so much to me because I was so invested in this story. I lived in this world, and I suffered with the characters. I fell so in love with this version of Sukuna. Idk but he was such a disaster. He was so bad for himself, and that made me want to save him so much and love him even harder. I felt so protective over him :(( And the scene in chapter 6 where they confess their love is still something that makes me cry when I think about it. So it makes me all giddy when you say that you could feel all those emotions too!! I cannot even put into words how much it means to me that you enjoyed the story and especially chapter 6!! I AM CRYING AGAIN!!

Omg helppp I LOVE your headcanon about them having a little boy who they name Yuuji omggg my heart!! It's what they deserve! <3<3

Thank you again, babe! I will never forget this! It means so much to me!! Especially since I am such a big fan of you!! You are one of my fave writers and such a sweet and fun person! I am so happy that you are my friend <3<3

[magic-space-games]

What are your top 10 video games?

Thank you @disasterdrvid for the tag!!! (It's almost a month late, oop.)

Tagging @dreaminginstasis , @ventrue-rosary , @resplendentlytrite , @catcactusoww , @bloomingjellies , @poodlepalace (Take this tagging not necessarily as a request to do a post like this [though if you do that'd be cool], but more as me showing you the things I like in a show-and-tell style presentation.)

In no particular order:

Mass Effect (all of them, yes even Andromeda, I cannot and will not separate them)

I'm a simple queer. I just really like spaceships and alien dick.

Hitman: World of Assassination

I dunno what it is, I just want 47 to be happy, and Hitman's roguelike mode lets me do that. He has a nice house (which actually reminds me of the house one of my high school friends used to live in, so it's like a nice little throwback to simpler times.) He goes fishing. Sometimes he assassinates people in puzzle-like scenarios, making really bad puns and murdery innuendo the whole time. I love it.

The Long Dark

This game is so fucking pretty. A solid survival game without any zombies. (Also the viewpoint character is voiced by the same voice actors who voiced Commander Shepard, so I can make up little fanfics in my head about Shepard being stranded on a frozen planet, waiting for the Normandy crew to come rescue them. I may or mayn't have actually drafted out this fanfic in my head a billion times. Don't look at me.)

Dragon Age 2

Dragon Age 2 is the best Dragon Age game IMHO. More smaller scale stories in video games please.

Death Stranding

If I think too hard about the symbolism in this game I start crying. Hideo Kojima made this game for me. It the perfect balance of weird shit and hope. This game is so fucking special and important to me, and I played it at the perfect time.

Echo

Furry horror visual novels sure are something else, and this one grabbed me by the heartstrings real quick (I haven't finished any storylines yet, but I'm still really enjoying it!) I'm a sucker for stories about groups of friends returning to their small hometown to find it worse than they left it, which I'm sure doesn't say anything about me personally. (Also, it's free.)

Audiosurf

I have legit been thinking about streaming Audiosurf on Twitch so I can kind of be like a late night radio DJ with seizure-inducing visuals to go with it (though I generally play with a texture mod that takes out the flashing visuals and weird zoom stuff.)

Stardew Valley

I like putting little things in little squares.

Disco Elysium

This game 100% deserved GotY. So well written.

Pyre

Pyre is the best Supergiant game. I am right. You can't change my mind. It's literally about starting a communist revolution. It's found family. It's fucking BEAUTIFUL. The gameplay is FUN. And I'm actually good at it for once.

#long post /

[ackermansimper]

Hanji x Kenny, if it's alright, there's very cute fanart of them both, I know it's unusual but I'm kind of dying to see what it could be like XD still ♥ Thank you!!

YES. Congrats to Kazuhiro and Romi (Kenny and Hange's VAs) for their marriage. Legit didn't know for the longest time 😭

Kenny x Hange headcanons!

(sorta modern and canon AU?)

-Kennyhan, Hanny, Kenhan?-

OKAY so

Kenny and Hange would definitely be a fun couple. They'd cause chaos together and I'm here for it, honestly.

as soon as they got together, it'd legit be them poking fun at Levi. They'd be absolutely relentless with teasing and insulting him together

Kenny would probably have no idea what Hange is doing with their experiments and just fidget with random things in their lab

Kenny would playfully insult them and joke around with them a lot. Hange would never mind the insults as they NEVER took it seriously but the jokes would just keep getting thrown back and forth

Hange being so chaotic and curious is probably what pulled Kenny in

He'd probably be the one making the first move too. Again, Hange made Kenny interested with all their shenanigans causing him to start flirting with them

They might not even understand it at first, honestly. Like why is this old man here saying this random crap? But they'd reciprocate it whether they meant to or not. Either that or he got blown off by them giving him short answers as they were completely focused on an experiment of theirs

They'd probably playfully flirt at first though before making anything official. Especially after learning they both knew Levi

In fact, he'd be their first conversation. They'd definitely bond over the 'little runt' and it's probably make them really good friends

I think Hange and Kenny would begin hanging out together doing their own hobbies. It could be at the bar, Hange's lab, some random rooftop as they wondered how long it'd take for a human to fall down the roof. It could be anywhere. They'd both make fun out of anything

I honestly don't think their personalities would clash much. They aren't the most similar but they aren't too different. Kenny would enjoy Hange's energy and chaotic self while Hange would enjoy Kenny's toughness and somewhat funny self

They'd both be the life of the parties with no shame. Like they'd both just be some chaotic duo doing stupid shit and not giving much of a damn about what anyone else thought

Kenny would definitely still be the tough one though. Although both of them aren't too serious all the time, Hange would be a bit more open and fun. Even then though, they both know when and where to get serious

I honestly think conversations with Hange and Kenny would be the farthest thing from bland. They could both talk for hours on end about the most random crap that it's impressive..Although, Kenny would definitely be the one to lend it quicker..Hange just cannot be stopped.

Once Kenny and Hange were to get together, it'd be game on. They'd be together a lot. They'd tease Levi together, talk about random stuff together, experiment together, and work as a team in a way

Kenny wouldn't be too soft with Hange of course but would treat them as a very close friend of his which he usually doesn't do so it definitely means something.

He'd be more open with them though, probably more than anyone else. He'd still keep stuff to himself since Hange's got a big chatter box on them but he'd be a bit more open with them in particular

Overall they'd have a pretty solid relationship. It'd have some rough edges sometimes but it wouldn't be a bad one since they could match each other's energy

♥ Thank you for reading ♥

[chihirolovebot]

Hiiiii so I'm the writer of The Final Piece and I am simply here to rant and rave about Sleep Awake because it's??? occupying so much of my mind it's not even funny??? I literally binged the whole thing in like 2 or 3 days and the chokehold your writing has me in is insanity. This is gonna be long I seriously hope that's okay but there's SO MUCH I wanna say! I have talked so much about all of Sleep Awake to my roommate and sister and friends that they all have practically read it second hand through me just talking about it and how much I love it. You are such a talented writer, and I'm sure you already know that, but I feel the need to tell you anyway.

Moving on!

I absolutely adore the MC you've created, their development has been SO satisfying to read, their journey into learning that it's okay to live for yourself instead of for other people just makes me sob and punch the air. It's such a relatable struggle and I love that you incorporated it into their character, it gives them a level of depth where you physically can't NOT root for them after everything they've been through.

I'm also a HUGE fan of platonic relationships (I'm asexual I can't help it I love reading about friends sm) and when I got into your fic I felt like the skies parted when the first chapter note mentioned you were also gonna focus on the platonic relationships because I WANNA BE FRIENDS WITH THEM TOO NOT JUST DATE THEM. The locker trio already had my heart but as the fic went on I slowly started to really like the MC and Maki's friendship as it developed and now other than Kiibo's and Shuichi's friendship with them she is probably my fav. I'll save all that for another time though.

Also also also the whole third trial??? Literally couldn't have asked for anything better. Seriously that was the best change to canon, from start to finish I loved every second reading it.

Every character you write feels so canon I feel like I can hear their voices in my head, it's wonderful. And don't even get me STARTED on Kokichi's characterization and his relationship with the MC. It's become so ingrained in my head that I forget that he doesn't have them in canon lmao. The almost cat and mouse game between them has me gripping the sides of my head. I went back to reread the game of Karma chapter like 15 times because it's one of my favorite scenes of theirs. They have such fun back and forth banter, and even while they are arguing I'm just sitting there reading and saying 'THEY'RE IN LOVE YOUR HONOR'.

Kokichi's struggle to trust the MC until recent chapters is being so perfectly well done, because it's EXACTLY how he would act too. Also his complete denial of having feelings for them in favor of his mission to stop the killing game??? Ugh. I could go on forever about how much I love this fic and how it's completely changed the trajectory of my life lmao, but I think I've rambled long enough. I'm sorry if this was just a lot of word vomit to read, but I have been wanting to reach out and have been so shy about it because all of this is kinda new to me. I legit have never even used Tumblr until recently, so I'm still trying to figure it all out.

Anyway! I'm always looking forward to updates from you, but please take care of yourself in the meantime <3 Thank you for writing something so wonderful, it's really something special

HI MY LOVELY im sorry this has been sitting for a minute i needed to be in a space to be able to actually write out a long thoughtful reply. so here we are!!!

first of all HI HELLO!!! i had no idea you had read sleep awake what!!! im very sorry if you've commented before because i may have forgotten because it does get a lot of comments but. honestly i just wanted to leave a nice review of ur work and then i found out you've read sleep awake!!!! insane. i cannot believe u have TALKED ABT SLEEP AWAKE in real life hello???? malfunctions. thank u so very much that is literally the highest of compliments.

im. very emotional and happy u like my mc. they r my baby considering they r basically Me but also i feel like the stuff they struggle with is general enough to be relatable to a lot of people. and i am very glad their journey resonated with you at least a little.

the platonic relationships!!! grabs u by the shoulders and shakes u like a rattle toy. OH MY GOD. yeah. yeah u get it. i jsut simply think romantic relationships r not inherently more important than friendships, and with sleep awake specifically i do not think that mc could heal and go on the journey they need to go on if they were only close with kokichi. like for sure he's a big help and big part of it, but an mc without kiibo, kaede, kirumi, shuichi, tenko, kaito and maki would literally not exist as they are now. TO BE A COMPLETE PERSON u must learn from the people around u that u love and maybe even the ones u hate. i think that is so special and so important, not just in fiction but in larger life. like. people who focus solely on romantic relationships in long fics u bamboozle me. it keys into this idea of 'oh if ur broken u just need one specific special person to fix u' and like. no. maybe u learn to put urself back together with constant help from the people around u, from ur family and ur friends and ur role models. not just the person u wanna kiss. that is just me tho.

im rly happy u mentioned mc and maki actually!!! i find that most people rly like mc's friendships with kiibo and shuichi and kirumi, which is understandable because mc doesn't get a ton of time with maki but. i really like what i've done with the two of them?? idk that feels big headed to say but writing their relationship develop has been super fun and it's one of those things i didn't rly plan? it just sorta happened and now mc has maybe too many friends but yk what. we move. maybe the real sleep awake was the friends we made along the way.

hhhghgbfhh kokichi and mc's relationship makes me so mentally ill. in a good way. and im really really happy ur invested in it. like my god i have put so much time n thought into these babies and i feel like one aspect of writing their relationship i dont talk abt as much is how patient u have to be. i feel like u would get this too, writing a slowburn urself — u have all these ideas u want to incorporate and ideas of how they get together, their first kiss, their first whatevers but. u gotta lay the groundwork first. and with characters like kokichi and nagito it's gonna be like 90% groundwork because they have walls and complexities a mile high. but im super happy with how it's developing.

this was absolutely. a delight to read please do not ever worry abt being a bother or anything to me. u are sincerely always always welcome to jump into my inbox n rant or talk about whatever i mean it. anytime. i welcome it. i am a bit shitty at answering asks but i rly do try always to get back to long comments like these even if it takes a minute. thank u so much for this and i hope u are having a lovely day <3333

#oh yeah. starts crying. #dear venus. #🏚.sleep awake

[simptasia]

HI OKAY, SORRY! No I am the Aaron accent/Dialect anon and may have sent other anons, but that's neither here nor there, but I come with updates? So I was really interested in this especially with your answer (which thank you so much for answering by the way I really appreciate it like so much! And never apologise for taking time to answer anons your time is your time!!! Play Sims 2 it's the best and if you do answer do it when you want to and have time to again it takes brain time to think of answers so don't like, apologise for that!!! :^D) BUT ANYWAY did some lil looking up the internet and I came across a study done in Antarctica where this exactly is happening which leads me to believe not only would Aaron accent shift but everyone else would as well? Here's the link (https://pubs.aip.org/asa/jasa/article/146/5/3327/993882/Phonetic-change-in-an-Antarctic-winter) to a really interested article and a TikTok (https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGJVt8mfm/) in case you're like nah I don't want to read all that, but the gist is they sent 8 British people, 1 American, 1 German and 1 Icelandic person to a remote station in Antarctica for work, there completely isolated from the world for a few months working and when they came back they were all pronouncing their vowels more similarly than before, and they were doing stuff like pronouncing their vowels 30 milliseconds longer and doing something called o fronting which is putting the o sound in the front of the word. SO WITH ALL THAT, I NOW BELIEVE THAT NOT ONLY WILL ARRON AND JIN YEON WOULD DEVELOP A NEW ACCENT. Sorry for the cap locks and super long explanation but It's so interesting cause okay let's imagine a world where none of them ever left they stayed on that island isolated from the world in a small community, they would start to see the beginning of a brand-new accent. Even though most of the islanders are American like i said there from all over so different pronunciations you would have Kate's Iowa twang mixing with Danielle's French while simultaneously mixing with Shannon's Cali girl style and getting drenched in The two Brits and single Aussies many slang words and ways to pronounce them then mashing that against Hurleys gorgeous Spanish accent (which I went and listen to god is there anything that man cannot do?) . Even if we follow a normal timeline where they make it off the island, they may be changes in Kate and Hurleys accent from hanging around Sawyer/ Charlie too much. Humans are human you copy stuff of your friends certain pronunciations copying quirks now take that to an isolated island in the south pacific. Again, so sorry to fill your inbox with this nonsense, but just imagine Ben and Locke's terrible divorce also ended up in their accents copying each other due to the nature of everything. Like imagine you hate this guy on the island and months later your accents are literally copying certain or mashing with their's to form a new one I would be so mad, I really would start biting people.

ooh wow i stand corrected, maybe Aaron and Ji (and other hypothetical island babies) would sound more weird than i realised!

again, don't say sorry. what's nice is that LOST is so multicultural that one's mind can lead to wonderings like this!

oh, oh, what you said about ben and locke there reminded me of a headcanon i have about hurley and ben. basically that because they're gonna spend so much time together, they're gonna start affecting each other. like hurley dresses neater (button up shirt + his curls in a poytail), ben starts being more casual (looser shirts and more unkept, like unshaven). and this idea includes hurley becoming more articulate and ben speaking less formally. it's not a full on uncanny valley transformation but they have influenced each other

legit, ben and hurley end up like, a good marriage

without the sex. but that's just my opinion

#i went off topic but i didn't know what to say #but you sent so much that i felt like i needed to say more than ''ooooh good shit!!!''